#i realized its mermay season
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Mermaid AU Yellow and Blue
#steven universe#su#su au#my au#mermaid au#su yellow diamond#yellow diamond#su blue diamond#blue diamond#bellow diamond#my art#doodles#i realized its mermay season#so yeah i drew mermaid yell and bloo#actually i made my own mermaid au a month ago
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Writing Roundup 2020
This is a writing reflection I’ve been doing for myself every year for the last four years. Its a positive boost to myself see how far I’ve come and look back on my progress for the past year and look forward to the new year.
Everyone is welcome to use this same format if they’d like to do the same!
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Stats:
Words written:
330,000, which is nearly half of all the words I’ve written on Ao3 in the last three years.
One Shots Posted (all fics plance unless otherwise stated):
In the Arms of the Ever(pink?) Tree (4463 words)
For the Plance Secret Santa exchange. Post s8 date/not date on a snowy moon. Love confession.
Birthday Treats (2129 words)
For Pidge’s birthday this year! Domestic family fluff, breakfast in bed, plance kids.
Begin Again (Together) (4805 words)
Canon divergence from before episode one! Pidge and Lance are established dating when alien intervention brings them to where they are supposed to be: with the Blue Lion. Just a brief look into what the AU would look like.
Common Ground (4521 words)
A treat for my friends who introduced me to Magic Knight Rayearth and pointed out some fun character parallels. There is this beautiful art Arya made to go with it because we’re all trash for both series. Plance meet up with Fuu and Ferio post series for both couples.
Bonded To You (1808 words)
For the Langstron Halloween Exchange! Established plance with a baby Lance is trying to keep safe from a witch who would take advantage of the child’s heritage.
It Tasted Good (6785 words)
Pikelavar for Pikelavar Month! The premise is crack, but it's mostly treated seriously. Pike ate the Jewel of Jitan by accident and doesn’t realize it until Haggar finds them. Meklavar gets Protective.
The Remainder of Days (3188 words)
Part of my Bad Things Happen Bingo. Fantasy AU where Pidge is a minor forest goddess and Lance is her neighbor mortal farmer.
I Love You a Lily More Each Day (3232 words)
Another of the Bad Things Happen Bingo. Canon compliant where Lance is undercover at a flower shop and knee deep in an illegal smuggling operation.
Lease on Life (4978 words)
This one was also part of Bad Things Happen Bingo and was an experiment. It’s POV of an oldest plance kid, canon verse. Her parents’ Paladin days come back to haunt them one night. Some cute family stuff too in there.
Ready to Dance (4135 words)
For the Valentine’s Day exchange! Post series. Lance tries to get back into the party scene and Pidge rescues him from a disastrous night.
Loopholes (5476 words)
Technically I didn’t write this fic this year, but a very kind reader asked if I would post this to Ao3, so it was my first fic of the year on Ao3. It’s Lotura! Originally a gift for a dear friend I’ve had since elementary school. It’s a fantasy AU where Lotor stumbles into Allura’s kingdom needing help.
Next to Me (7311 words)
Also for Bad Things Happen Bingo, this is probably one of my favorite fics of the year. This is the canon verse AU that went all wrong in s7, and Sendak succeeds in destroying Earth. Lance and Pidge end up not only his prisoners, but also two of the last humans in the universe. Ends open ended, but it became a series in the end!
Into Me (14248 words)
The sequel to the above fic. There are two versions, this and the one below. The title tells all. Lance and Pidge come to terms with their new life aboard Sendak’s flagship and do their best to keep the other comforted.
Into Me (non-explicit version) (7228 words)
Exactly the same as the fic above, only this one is SFW
Sunshine (3831 words)
A Bad Things Happen Bingo! One of my favorite concepts. Canon verse. Pidge gets sick while she and Lance are on a scientific mission.
Showoff (635 words)
A really short fic for a friend on their birthday, featuring their plance kids!
Respite of the Heart (4181 words)
A fic I have been wanting to write for a very long time. I love the concept of Pidge as a Disney Princess in the sense she has the forest guardian theme and all these animals love her. So there’s some play on that as the Paladins stop for lunch on their journey back to Earth in early s7. Lance comes to a realization and they have a chat surrounded by the animal friends. @anchoredtetherart did a phenomenal piece to accompany it. Please look at it in awe here.
The Hardest Part (3960 words)
For Bad Things Happen Bingo! An AU of the episode The Reunion where Pidge doesn’t return when she’s supposed to.
A Planned Sacrifice (4988 words)
Another Bad Things Happen Bingo. Canon verse. Pidge assumes that being a sacrifice for the ‘forest god’ is strictly ceremonial and at worst a wild animal. It’s actually Sendak, who no one has seen since Shiro shot him out of the Castle. He remembers Pidge and is far too pleased to see her again, tied up on a silver platter.
Almost Forgotten, but Not Gone (3946 words)
Bad Things Happen Bingo. AU sometime in s1 where Haxus isn’t as dead as Pidge thought.
Touch (7519 words)
Written for the Lance Goes Boom bang! It was inspired by @fenixseraph ‘s amazing art here! It’s a different take on The Way Forward, where Pidge and Lance are separated from the rest of the team and placed in their own cell. And the Red Lion causes issues.
Chaptered Fics started/added to:
Wolf In Thieves’ Clothing (4516 words)
An AU of The Castle of Cagliostro from Lupin the Third series. Lee, you have my thanks forever for making me watch this finally. Pidge is a literal princess whose kingdom is in the middle of an internal coup. Lance is a gentleman thief who rides with his best buds Hunk and Matt. Their paths are destined to cross again when Lance goes back to the castle he used to call home.
Game of Love (4593 words)
The most crack of the bunch. AU of Fall the of the Castle of Lions where Sendak and Haxus get away with it all. Pidge and Lance are prisoners on Haxus’ new ship, and Lance finds an opportunity for eventual escape when he learns that Haxus has a crush on his second in command. Operation matchmaker begins. (happy ending planned for all)
What Tides May Bring (20704 words)
Collab with the fantastic @anchoredtetherart for MerMay! Established plance as mermaids and guardians of their elements with adorable mer child. Then angst because they are all captured by a ‘research’ institute.
Seasons of Magic (16546 words)
I actually added a chapter this year! Ongoing collection of one-shots with mage Pidge who lives in the country and cultivates her plant magic and makes potions with the assistance of her dragon familiar, Lance. Mostly domestic fluff.
Too Soon and Not Soon Enough (11438 words)
Added another chapter this year to my Keith-centric AU. It’s basically VLD but five years early and they’re all literally child Paladins. Keith gets to meet Krolia earlier and its fun to go into tween friendships as they try and navigate the reality of their situation.
Seeds (48833 words)
Added a ton earlier this year. A collection of plance fics all or mostly under 500 words. All meant to be adopted by others if interest strikes. Covers many genres.
Chaptered Fics Finished:
Resolve to Fly (75799 words)
Written for the Pidge Angst Bang. My artist @alchemie0 did an outstanding job capturing the feel of the fic. Look at the art here! Canon verse AU where Pidge encounters Haxus, who has crashed on Earth. She helps him repair his ship in excitement and good faith, which he pays back by kidnapping her. For two years she survives as little more than a housepet on Sendak’s ship. Gen.
Who's Protecting Who? (28989 words)
Also technically not written this yeah, but posted. A collab with Hush waaaay back in 2018. It's a plance Altean AU with Pidge as distant royalty and Lance as a bodyguard.
A Dish Served Cold (21533 words)
Finally finished this one! Canon verse in which Pidge accidentally runs into Sendak on an isolated planet. Sendak takes advantage of this encounter and tries to return to the Empire with her in tow. Much Pidge whump. Gen
Reflections:
Best title
I still really really love Too Soon and Not Soon Enough (11438 words). Because it's too soon for the Paladins to be Paladins, and for Keith it's not nearly soon enough for Krolia to return. It just feels like it has a lot of heart to it. I hope I can keep it going, but my ideas are incredibly scattered for it.
Worst title
Touch (7519 words). Yeah it’s a play on ‘Don’t you touch her’ but it feels soooo dry.
Best/worst last line
Best: This was really, really hard choice this year, but ultimately, making up for the terrible title, its Touch (7519 words)
“It feels good to escape the ship with all of his teammates, secure in the knowledge that he has a way forward not just as a Paladin, but also with Pidge.”
- Not only did I manage to fit the title of the episode in there, it's got that hopeful tinge to it and reflects on personal growth both internally and with Pidge.
Worst: This one isn’t necessarily bad from Begin Again (Together) (4805 words), but it could be better. It didn’t get quite the epic sense I was hoping to pull from it.
“Okay,” he smirks, hand firmly on the throttle. “Operation save Earth starts now.”
Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted?
Definitely wrote way more. Even with posting two fic that are essentially the exact same, I still ended up writing nearly half of my total Ao3 word count this year. (330,000/670,000). Doing Bad Things Happen Bingo was a bit part of that - I was very inspired at the beginning of this year - but also there were many events I participated in (8 total!!) on top of my personal projects.
What’s your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.
A really hard decision this year, because there are several that make me really happy. I think oddly enough though, it’s Game of Love (4593 words) because of its potential and how much crack it is. It has such whacky rom-com energy to it but also that underlying angst of the situation I can fall back on. My favorite trope to explore is what happens to the characters when they’re captured. I just really enjoy the concept and the challenge to make such a concept believable with minimal suspension of belief.
Okay, NOW your most popular story.
Using kudos as my gauge (and not counting the chapter fics), the winner is:
Respite of the Heart (4181 words)
Not surprising because Ivy’s art is STUNNING.
Story most underappreciated by the universe?
I think that’s It Tasted Good (6785 words), the pikelavar fic. Pikelavar is underappreciated in general
Story that could have been better?
For all I was excited to write Sunshine (3831 words), it didn’t quite fall the way I had imagined in my mind. I don’t know if it was the structure or I was running out of steam or what. All i know is that I wanted more but all I could concentrate on was that scene where he’s caring for her in bed. Maybe I was just too ambitious.
Sexiest story?
No brainer it's Into Me (14248 words). Literally. Which really shocked me that it happened. Didn’t think I’d write any smut at all, let alone this year. This particular fic just kinda called out for it
Saddest story?
The prequel to the above fic: Next to Me (7311 words). How much more sad can you get than Earth being destroyed, being Sendak’s prisoners all while trying to tell each other ‘i love you’ without seeming weird because you’re the last humans in the universe.
Most fun?
I think it's Ready to Dance (4135 words). Just Valentine’s fluff and impromptu slow dancing in the park at night.
Story with single sweetest moment?
I’m picking What Tides May Bring (20704 words). Listen, mer Lance and mer Pidge playing with their mer baby in their domestic paradise is probably one of my favorite things I’ve ever written. Dad Lance has my heart.
Hardest story to write?
The last chapter of A Dish Served Cold (21533 words) was like pulling teeth. I’m pretty happy with it in the end but at the time man it was so hard.
Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?
I wrote smut. It was...weird? But also strangely calming. I wrote more for another fic but it's still a WIP. I definitely need to be in the mood to write it.
Proudest Achievement:
The Pidge Angst Bang. Resolve to Fly (75799 words). Look at that word count. I only wanted something under 3k at first, so it was just going to be Pidge meeting Haxus. But by the time I finished that part it was already 10k. So even though I was going through a rough part of my life, I just kept going and it ended up being my therapy. I’m really proud of the fic and I love my artists’ pieces. It really lifted my spirits. (You should all really go check out the Ao3 collection of all the bang stories and art they are AMAZING you won’t regret. If you love Pidge angst they are all must reads.)
What are your fic writing goals for next year?
I’d like to finish my Bad Things Happen Bingo card and then focus on my current WIP, that includes the Seeds collection. There are days I still feel a bit overwhelmed, and I’m still trying to find a routine after moving. I’d like to do more events too, but I think I need to be more selective about which ones I do. I don’t want to burn myself out.
Apart from that, I’d really like to try and give back to the community more. I’d like to start consciously writing fics for others without an event to go by.
Past Years:
2017
2018
2019
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Mermay 2020 Day 4: Adjustment Period
Coral was definitely a woman who loved her simple village life. She married Maury who lived to fish and worked on making their house a home. She gave birth to a son who was following in his father’s footsteps to become a fisherman as well. Though raising Ronan had its ups and downs. When he was a boy, Ronan loved looking for the oddest things to bring home. At first it was just odd shaped rocks and shells, but then she had to put her foot down when he started bringing animals home. Coral had hoped that he had grown out of that fascination when he got older.
But he just had to bring an honest to god mermaid home!!!
Now Coral wished that Ronan just brought in another two-legged cat again. At least you can look up ways to take care of such an animal. No such luck with mermaids. The young mermaid seemed rather intelligent but just awkward, no doubt confused by her surroundings. With it being so late, all Coral could do was to make the couch into a makeshift bed and see what sort of seafood they had to make a late supper.
Ida didn’t seem to mind. She loved the feeling of the blankets and was amazed with the electric blanket when she was shown how it worked. Maury got to talk about how electricity works for a good hour as Ida thought it was just magic. Ronan showed her books and began teaching her how to read English. No doubt she was going to need some entertainment until they could find a solution to her mobility problem.
They enjoyed a meal of crab cakes and vegetables which they found that mermaids really love seafood. Ida explained that much of her diet consisted of seafood…raw seafood that is. Thankfully she enjoyed the cooked version. Coral was going to have to look into their food budget as they were going to have to get a lot more fish in the house. Maybe there was a place that delivered sushi somewhere.
It was the next morning, Ronan and Maury already left to get an early start on their daily fishing so that they could help Ida settle in later. Coral rose herself not too long afterwards and went to check on Ida. The mermaid was all wrapped up in the blankets sleeping soundly. Deciding to let the girl sleep, Coral went to set up an extravagant bath. Sooner or later Ida would notice the dried salt on her skin and her hair all messy and tangled. Looks like the first thing on the agenda was hair and skin care lessons.
Once that bath was full of hot water and bubbles, Coral went down to get breakfast going, breakfast fish tacos to be precise. Coral counted on the smell to rouse Ida so they could get their day going. Taking the finished plate, Coral placed the meal on the coffee table allowing the scent to fill the room. The effect was instantaneous, Ida sat upright wide awake.
“What smells amazing?!” Ida asked looking around.
“Breakfast my dear.” Coral held up the plate, “I bet you are hungry.”
The plate was completely spotless in minutes, “This is only my second meal on land…and already I think human cooking is the best thing in the world.”
“I’ll take those compliments to heart.” Coral smiled.
Ida then realized that there were some people missing, “Where are Ronan and Maury?”
“They went to the docks to get an early start to the day’s fishing.” Coral explained, “You see, fishermen need to work every day during the fishing season to make good money as the markets only buy fresh fish. If they catch too much in one day and it doesn’t sell, the fish could spoil and that’s wasted money.”
Ida nodded taking in the information, “And this is their work everyday?”
“There are some parts of the year where they don’t fish. Certain types of fish are only available in certain parts of the year. Also, it’s against the law to fish out of season. Fishing too much can hurt the fish population.”
Ida mulled over the information, “That explains why I see shadows of boats in only certain parts of the year. So this is a fishing day for them?”
“It is. But since they got an early start, they’ll come back early. Ronan was really excited to spend more time with you.” Coral teased.
A small blush creeped across Ida’s face. “So…what do I do now?”
“First things first, you are getting a bath.” Coral continued knowing Ida was going to ask more questions, “A bath is a necessity for living on land as we are not constantly in the water. You’re probably feeling the dry salt on your skin and you’re gonna have to learn how to take care of your hair.”
Ida held up the now rather tangled mane of her hair, “I suppose so.”
“My dear…let me introduce you to the wonder of bath time.” Coral grinned.
Let’s just say that Ida was in the bath for a good two hours. Turns out mermaids had no idea that water could be hot or could make bubbles. It took some time for Coral to help Ida scrub every inch of her as well as under her scales. Then it was time to tame the massive head of hair. Coral didn’t bother trying to time how long it took to detangle the hair, but she did use up her entire bottle of detangler spray. Fortunately, Coral knew how to tie the tightest of braids securing each strand then rolling it all up into a bun.
Ida was certainly impressed, “I never knew you could do all of this with hair.”
“I’ll be more than happy to teach you but first….” Coral slammed a huge stack of books onto the table, “Lessons on living on land.”
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Any more mermaid aus? I’ve blasted through your tag already....
Happy MerMay! Have a masterlist!
Stars shine bright above you, the ocean whispers below you - captainhurricane @aarnivalkeaa
16k. (Teen).
Keith keeps looking up at the stars, when he could be looking down at the ocean.
Baby I’m preying on you - reetsu
ongoing, 5/? chapters, 9k. (Explicit). Contains: rape/non-con, abo dynamics.
“Why are you doing this?”“Because Shiro loves you. That’s why I’m going to ruin you for him.”
[mermaid au where Kuro does something very terrible to Keith]
when freedom called my name - psyraah @shiroganedefencesquad
3k. (General).
Keith saves a merman. In the process, he saves himself.
“Let him drown!”
Keith winced. That voice was unmistakably Sendak’s. No one went against Sendak and, well, that was going to be that.
Deciding not to think about how much longer he had before they tossed him over the side of the ship, Keith peered through the hole in the hull to the wide expanse of the ocean outside, chains scraping on the damp floor as he shifted. He wondered where the mer had gone. Had he been able to find his family? Keith could only hope so—it had never felt right for the creature to be held captive. Keith had seen many atrocities in his years on the ship, but there had been something so wrong about holding the mer. The pained defiance in the creature’s eyes, the deep sorrow it held. It had been without its family.
Keith knew that feeling all too well.
So in the end, it had been an easy decision to make. An easy decision to choose freedom and life, even if it meant he condemned his own.
Stolen Fishes & Eggcellent Wishes - SuccubustyKisses
4k. (Explicit). Contains: NSFW content, oviposition.
“Keith, you know if I do something you don’t like all you have to do is say so and I will never do it again. I would never pressure you into anything.” Shiro lets out the same sentence he’s said many times before in many different ways.
The pufferfish drops into its new tank and Keith turns to Shiro, confusion knitting his brow as he holds the plastic bag to his chest. “I know that, Shiro. Why would you think you did something wrong?”
“Because every time I try to get intimate with you, you run away like I lit your ass on fire.” Shiro tries to not sound dejected, but he knows he fails as he looks up into Keith’s guilty face.
Sighing loudly Keith steps down from the stool. “I know, Shiro. I promise, it will all make sense soon. Just… please bear with me a little bit longer.”
Of Two Worlds - teicakes
16k. (Teen).
Shiro had always loved the stars.
He’d spent countless nights watching them twinkle overhead, spinning slowly around his head like a great distant halo. He’d tracked their patterns, followed his favourite constellations over the horizon and greeted them when the reemerged seasons later. Shiro had counted every falling star he’d seen, a running tally etched in the soft stones that made up his home. Some of them would spin around the horizon out of sight, or others would burn out in the middle of their path. No matter his best efforts, he’d never managed to find one that made it down to Earth.
Star 143 was different though.
Star 143 brought Keith.
Or else, Galra Keith crashes down to Earth only to befriend a stargazing merman who can’t take his eyes off him.
The Mermaid of Lake Altea - flukeloops @shiroisthenewblack
24k. (Mature). Contains: NSFW content.
The Mermaid of Lake Altea has been a story passed from camper to camper for almost ten years. It’s the tale of a lonely young mermaid who gets rejected by her crush when they find out she has fins. When camp counselor Keith hears it, he becomes obsessed with uncovering the truth. While projecting his own loneliness on the mermaid, he also tries to uncover his handsome, co-counselor, Shiro. Keith has fallen hard and fast for him, but there’s something mysterious about Shiro as well. What’s his connection to the mermaid? Will Keith’s quest for a mythical creature sabotage his quest to get with Shiro?
The Alien at Camp Marmora - flukeloops @shiroisthenewblack
ongoing, 6/10 chapters, 19k. (Mature).
Shiro and Keith are back at Camp Arus and madly in love. Alfor has to take a week off to tend to personal matters and has left his friend Kolivan in charge. Kolivan presents the staff and campers with Camp Marmora: a grueling 5-day challenge that tests their bodies and maybe even their minds. Will Shiro and Keith’s fairy tale romance stand through it all? What will the challenge reveal about both of them?On top of it all, the longer Shiro stays in human form, the worse his legs hurt. He’s afraid that he and Keith’s worlds will drift too far apart if he has to live in the water.[SEQUEL to The Mermaid of Lake Altea]
The Aquamarine Oath - gingayellow
584 words. (Teen).
Keith is rescued from the ocean by a stranger who seems friendly, but won’t leave his spot by the rocks.
Siren Song - TheAnxiousAce
ongoing, 6/? chapters, 6k. (Teen).
A Mer’s rite of passage, their transition into adulthood, is simple: choose a human, captivate them with song, and drown them.
What’s not so simple is what happens when a Mer chooses not to. And slowly falls in love.
Or: The Mer!AU nobody asked for.
no luck in swordfishing - shoutz @shoutzwastaken
6k. (Mature). Contains: graphic violence.
There are giants out there in the canyons, and a good captain can’t fall asleep.
“Hello? Are you okay?” Shiro calls as he sets foot on land. This island, unlike the bigger coast, is covered in sand from years of waves lapping against the shores. Shiro can see drag marks in it from where the stranger must have pulled himself onto land, disappearing where the tide has washed the indentations flat.
Shiro doesn’t think about why he had to drag himself onto shore until he gets a better look at his legs.
What he had thought were shiny or wet pants of some sort aren’t actually pants at all. He steps closer, and freezes. The guy doesn’t even seem to have legs, instead sporting one long appendage where two should reside. Tail is the first word that comes to mind, but it’s a ridiculous thought. Right? Mermaids aren’t real.
Right?
in the deep, deep blue i found you - captainhurricane @aarnivalkeaa
2k. (Explicit). Contains: fem Sheith, NSFW content.
Keith has been a diver all her life. She’s never found anything or anyone quite like Shiro.
series: Ocean of Storms - radiofreekerberos @radiofreekerberos
ongoing, 4/? works, 17k. (Teen).
When Shiro was ten-years-old, he lost his right arm in a boating accident and found a mystery. Part one of the Ocean of Storms series.
A light rain began to fall and the sea turned choppy, dark waves sloshing over the sides of the boat. Shiro barely noticed, his eyes cast unseeing at a fixed point on the horizon until something suddenly caught his eye, a luminous spot in the water. His brow knit as he watched it slowly gliding towards him; a lavender glow just below the choppy surface. It veered off at the last minute to glide alongside the boat, and Shiro tracked its movements with fascination. Whatever if was, it wasn’t very big. Maybe roughly his size, though most of its length seemed to be made up of a long and powerful tail.
series: Land and Sea - Angelicat2 @iamstuckinfandom
ongoing, 2/? works, 8k. (Teen). Contains: graphic violence.
When Shiro almost drowns in the ocean, he remembers waking up to the person who saved him. Months later, he finds him again.
“Thank you,” Shiro muttered as he grinned, feeling relief flood through his body, “For saving me. What’s your name?”
“Keith,” Keith stated with a somewhat raspy voice as he watched Shiro, “What’s yours?”
“I’m Takashi Shirogane, but everyone calls me Shiro,” he felt his cheeks warm up at the look Keith gave him, “But you might know that already.”
“I guessed,” the boy shrugged as he glanced away, “Heard…rumors.”
“Are they bad or good rumors?”
“Not sure,” Keith raised a brow, but Shiro could see the slight grin on his lips, “But the one about you being a damsel-in-distress was right.”
Cold Corners - catpoop @swummeng-geys
1k. (General).
Sheith Month ‘17 - 10/8: Prosthetic
(Merpeople!AU) Keith remembers Shiro’s capture like it was yesterday
Indigo - LittleKazoo
5k. (Explicit). Contains: NSFW content.
Shiro’s world was literally turned upside down when he was saved from drowning by a certain ocean beauty.
A Hidden Treasure in the Sea - TheNightOwls
2k. (General).
Nothing ever goes as planned, does it?In which Shiro is met with a mysterious figure when going out for his early morning jog.
Waters Of Red And Black (Sheith Positivity Week 2k17) - bisexualinspace
6k. (General).
Everything I wrote for Sheith Positivity Week 2k17!MerKeith and MerShiro.
every breath you take - arahir @arahir
ongoing, 4/6 chapters, 25k. (Explicit). Contains: NSFW content.
Keith takes a swim, gains a secret admirer, and finds something to live for.
There’s a cut on his bottom lip, a row of tiny lacerations that smart when he pulls at them to get a better look.
He doesn’t notice the bruise on his upper arm until the next day. He catches the edge of it at the corner of his eye when he’s pulling on a fresh shirt: blue lines, like stripes, but when he turns and twists to see how they ring his arm, he realizes what they look like.
The lines are like fingers. It’s a handprint.
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Going to do a bit of rambling since I haven't actually gone into my purpose for doing this blog or anything about myself really. It’s all over the place, my scatterbrain is strong tonight.
The main purpose, I work ALOT between April and October. Like live in management of my families motel, ALOT, now add a toddler on top of that noise. Flashback to the summer of 2017. I was averaging 90+ hours a week running the front desk here, while 5-10 months postpartum. I am an introvert, a socially awkward introvert. I naturally went into depression. I had actually been depressed but didn’t realize it until then.
I started antidepressants which worked for a hot minute and cause weight gain, that was wonderful. I hated myself so fucking much because of it. Switched to another and started counselling. That one stopped working and I decided I didn't want to play the pill roulette. I stopped taking them in February of this year, started working out and dieting to a point where I feel better about myself and got back into my nerdy hobbies that I had lost interest in because of the depression.
Some of my depression happened when I moved to where I am now. I’ve been here for several years now, and in that time I had to back off the hobby I loved the most, the hobby that gave me self confidence, and made me the happiest...well besides writing smut for my best friends. That was cosplay. I went to the first con since I got married in 2015 back in March and it was the eye-opener I needed to see that I had lost a piece of myself. I wanted to make more cosplays, and I still do. I had a cosplay page but I deleted it a few years ago for some reason...
I felt good enough to get back into drawing and writing to where I started this as a headcanon blog where I could just throw my ideas and dirty trash cannons up, I did a couple but while wanting to participate in mermay I got the bright idea to combine it with one of my favourite games which switched this to an MK sketch blog. I was going to do some Thrones mermaids but I was more inspired for the MK ones. I genuinely didn't think people would like my stuff. I’m self-conscious about my written stuff sooooooo I don’t post, like any.
My depression may be gone my anxiety has gotten worse over the past few years, but I’ll take that over depression any day.
But anyway, this blog is helping me cope with my crazy work schedule by keeping me in my happy place and getting me through this season. Which is a fucking lifesaver because I’m not happy doing this work but I feel obligated because if I leave my husband goes too and it's his family that needs us. Even though his mother thinks that someday I can be this extrovert who doesn't need a creative outlet to stay sane. Yeah...okay. Cool story.
When I say I appreciate you guys, I mean it with every fibre of my being. Thank you for liking my stuff, thank you for liking it enough to ask for more. You’re keeping me afloat from the horrid black pit of self-hate hell.
@serenaqueen181 thank you for being my desk relief and yay or naying my sketches. Lol. Now we need to get to October so we can start that cosplay workshop in the lobby.
NOW, to the stuff about sketches!
Update on requests. I’m not doing them in any particular order. Mostly things I think the ref I’ve already found would work for or ones that I’m inspired to do atm. I have about 5-7 I need to do or decline. I keep losing my list or my kid runs off with it, so I don’t have an exact number.
I switch moods like crazy so just because I don’t do something now, doesn't mean I won't later. One day I could be like I REALLY WANT TO DRAW SINDEL! And tomorrow is maybe like Kotal or a whole other fandom or something. Unless its Kano, I’m always in the mood for Kano. Maybe someday I’ll make a list of series and stuff I’m into. But today is not that day.
I promise Subscorp will happen, I’ve tried numerous times but I wasn't really digging how they came out. :(
Oct-March I should be way more active...Hell even September, hopefully. I don’t work during those months so fingers crossed. Should be working on D&D stuff cause I would like to get that comic off the ground X_X. But for now, while it’s balls to the wall busy I’m going to do what I can.
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Regarding ideas for after Inimitable, perhaps WinterIron Space Au? Setting it on another/multiple planets would leave plenty of room for worldbuilding. If Space is too open of a prompt, mermay is going on right now, so perhaps something with mermaids? No matter what you end up doing, I look forward to reading it! I always enjoy your writing.
I kept this around because I wanted to write a mermaid AU for you (and because I don’t typically write creatures like that so its a challenge). After seeing The Shape of Water I told myself I ain’t no monster fucker here I am writing a fuckin Shape of Water AU featuring Tony/ Rhodey. I have no clue if you even like that pairing but Ive had the idea floating around for some time so here goes. Sidenote: This got ridiculously long.
***
Rhodey is probably lucky that Sam has his back otherwise he’d be late to work every day. He has no idea how he manages given that he gets up on time every day, leaves with plenty of time to get to work every day, and yet he still only manages to punch in barely on time. “Rhodey, you seriously need to get your shit together,” Sam mumbles at him, handing him his punch in card.
He sighs, punching in, and sticking his card in the right slot. “I told you, I always leave with time to spare but this always happens,” he says. “Thanks though.”
Sam gives him a look but allows Rhodey his excuses before they set off with their daily tasks. Its the same shit every day and Rhodey has to deal with the fact that he’s smarter than everyone else in this fucking building. Sam too- while all the white guys were trying to figure out the math he and Sam usually have all their problems solved and then they’ve solved unanticipated problems with the new math before anyone even figures out the initial problem. But being smart and black isn’t exactly easy and even when Rhodey did manage to convince someone to listen to his solutions they resented him for having a solution to begin with.
So he and Sam clean things even though they’re way more qualified to do the jobs around them than the people currently working literally any other position. But Sam makes the work fun at least so when they’re outside of the prying eyes of those around them they talk about everything and anything under the sun. They’re talking about which color is the beset color when they’re interrupted rudely.
They get their orders to go clean a usually classified space and Sam exchanges a look with him before they shrug and move off to do their jobs. “You ever wonder if they send us to do these jobs because they think we’re too stupid to understand what we’re looking at?” Sam asks in a low voice as they move down the hall with their cleaning cart.
“I know for a fact that’s why we get these jobs,” Rhodey says.
“Too bad no one else likes black people either- it’d be kind of nice to sell these assholes out to prove a point,” Sam says.
“Probably not worth the results though,” Rhodey points out. “Better to just deal.”
Sam lets out a long sigh and they let themselves into the room they’re sent to clean. Rhodey’s eyebrows shoot up and he doesn’t have to look at Sam to know he’s had the same reaction. “What the hell happened here?” Sam asks softly.
Rhodey looks over the large amount of blood and water in the room and shakes his head. “I have no idea,” he says softly. They slowly set to work, cautious in case whatever it was that resulted in all the blood was still around. It takes awhile before Sam lets out a yell and jumps back, catching Rhodey’s attention. He looks over and raises an eyebrow. “Is that…?”
“A finger? Yeah. That’s… nasty,” he says. Rhodey wrinkles his nose and grabs a bag from the cart and carefully holds it open for Sam. He looks at the finger, than the bag, and back at the finger again before he raises an eyebrow. “You expect me to pick that thing up?” Sam asks and Rhodey shrugs.
“You found it, you deal with it,” he says.
“Yeah, I found it, you deal with it. I did my dues almost stepping on that thing,” he says.
“I am not touching that thing. You found it, your problem.” Rhodey rustles the bag a little and Sam gives him a dirty look, gingerly leaning forward so he can pick the finger up. He all but throws it at Rhodey, who lets out a loud yell and fumbling a little but ultimately catches the severed digit in the bag. “You are nasty. You can take this thing to its owner now, I want nothing to do with it,” he says, wrinkling his whole face in disgust.
Sam rolls his eyes, “fine, but you get stuck dealing with the mess,” he says and Rhodey sighs.
“Fine,” he mumbles. A quick glance around tells him its not that much work, but its enough work that its time consuming. Sam runs off and Rhodey sets to work on the floor, mumbling to himself as he sets to work mopping.
He’s almost done the floor when he notices movement out of the corner of his eye. At first he thinks Sam might have taken pity on him but he realizes the movement is from the wrong part of the room. When he looks over he doesn’t find anything so he goes back to work. It takes a few more moments but the movement happens again and this time when Rhodey looks over he catches what caused the movement.
Its… shocking to look at. Some kind of fish… man… thing. The red and gold scales are quite striking though, and so are the long, gossamer fins fluttering around his body. Its the gash in his side that catches Rhodey’s attention though because its darkening the water around it as blood leaves the body of the man in the tank.
The fish looks down, covering the wound with his hand before he swims off. Rhodey frowns, unsure what to do.
***
Its a whim to cook more eggs than he usually eats in the morning and its more of a whim to eat lunch in a room he isn’t supposed to be in but he also knows no one will look there for him. Its rare that people paid much attention to the help around them. He sits at the edge of the pond like space in the middle of the room, curious to see if its connected to the tank he last saw the fish guy in. He settles in, eyes on the tank as he eats his eggs.
That’s probably why he doesn’t notice the fish man sneak up on him, swimming quietly enough that Rhodey jumps when a scaly hand reaches out of the water and snatches one of his eggs off the side of the pond before swimming off, far less quiet about his retreat. Rhodey settles himself back in after a moment of watching the water before he turns his back to the pond again. Its on a whim that he looks over at the tank and he’s surprised to find his companion there, watching him with the egg in his hand.
Rhodey shakes his head, smiling a little before he turns back to his food. He notices that the mermaid doesn’t eat the egg until Rhodey does. It’s an obvious test to see whether or not the food is poisoned and its smart. It doesn’t occur to him until he’s on his way home that the fish had also intentionally watched his reaction to his stolen food. He wonders if he passed the test.
***
Tony really hates that Rumlow guy. He seems to think Tony has some secrets to unlock and even if he could communicate with these people in a language they’d immediately understand he wouldn’t give them information on principal. He doesn’t like being treated like shit for no reason. He does, however, rather like his lunch dates with the dark skinned man that feeds him… well, something. Whatever the oval object is it tastes much better than whatever the hell Rumlow tries to feed him. Plus he’s sure that the food is drugged because he always feels groggy after eating. Rhodey’s eggs- he had eventually learned his name thanks to that friend of his calling after him- at least help him avoid eating Rumlow’s food. Not much, but enough that it gives him more strength to figure out how the hell to get out of here.
Rhodey is feeding him eggs and chattering about his day- he’s figured out quickly that Tony understands even if he can’t respond- when the door opens. Rhodey lets out a soft string of curse words before he grabs his bag and runs off around a corner and Rumlow marches in. Tony sinks into the water a little, glaring at the man. He bit one finger off, he’ll go for his hand next. Fucking prick.
“What are you doing near the edge of the water?” he asks. Tony growls at him for lack of a better response.
Rumlow rolls his eyes, “get him out,” he says to his goons. They exchange a look with each other because they aren’t too stupid to miss the fact that the water is Tony’s territory. No one really fared well with him in here even with the fucking collar around his neck. He’s working on picking the lock on that.
They do eventually manage though because Tony still has whatever drug he’s being fed in his system and by now they’re used to this. If he were faster it wouldn’t be a problem, but he’s not so here he is, on the ground outside of the water gasping a little for breath. He can breathe outside of water but not much and not for long so he tends to save that for the real emergencies. When Rumlow asks him a question he knows Tony can’t answer and proceeds to electrocute him with that stick thing it quickly escalates to that emergency status. If not for his superior hearing he would have missed Rhodey’s small gasp but his hearing is built for water- he hears better than humans. Its a good thing now because Rhodey would have just given himself away if that weren’t true.
When Tony get prodded with that thing for the third damn time he notices the egg. He’s lucky Rumlow hasn’t noticed yet, or his goons, but he does notice a third human hanging back a little, examining the situation a little. His skin is a little darker than those around him and Tony has come to recognize that this gives him a lower status. He’s not sure why exactly- in his experience the darker skinned ones tended to be nicer. In his own home the pale parts of his skin are mostly irrelevant. They live too deep to see it most of the time and really only rise up high enough to see the colors of their skin during mating seasons. Tony happens to know he’s quite pretty- his striking colors are rare, but its fin color that matters, not the rest. But he supposes humans don’t have fins so they have no choice but to care about the rest.
“You need to stop, he has to go back in the water,” the man tells Rumlow but he’s shaken off.
“Shut up. You’re only here because you’re supposed to be an expert on sea life,” he snaps. “And when this one is dead you can be an expert on him too.”
Tony lets out an annoyed squeak and gets electrocuted for his efforts but the slightly tan man pulls Rumlow back. Bad idea considering he nearly gets prodded too. “You can’t kill him! He’s a rare species, you need to put him back in the sea!” he yells.
“You better stay in line or-” Rumlow starts but the other man rolls his eyes.
“Or what, Rumlow. You pulled me out of a war zone- you think you can do better than me watching my family die?” he asks. The room grows uncomfortably silent for a few moments before Rumlow, to Tony’s surprise, backs down.
“Put it back in the water. I’ll put in the order to euthanize it,” he says, looking at the other man as he says it. The other man offers a protest that’s quickly shot down and Tony is tossed unceremoniously back into the water.
When the brown man looks over to him Tony looks pointedly at the egg. Rumlow and his men are leaving, but he’s hoping he can communicate with this one. He follows Tony’s gaze and his eyes widen a little before he turns back to Tony, who looks pointedly to where Rhodey is hiding. Thankfully for him Rhodey is half leaning around the corner and jumps back behind it right as the other man looks over. He considers this for a moment before he nods to Tony, “I wil be back for you,” he says softly before bending and tossing him the egg. Tony catches it and disappears back into the water.
***
Rhodey is skulking the area around the classified room out when he feels a tap on his shoulder. He jumps, spinning around and relaxing when he recognizes the man. “Uh, hey?” he asks more than states.
“My name is Yinsen and I’m going to make the assumption that you care about the fish in that tank. You feed him.” Rhodey nods because he doesn’t know what else to say really. “We need to get him out and you would know this building much better than I would. And we have two days to do this.”
Rhodey swears under his breath, “I… might have some help we can use,” he says, hoping to hell Sam will go along with this.
***
Sam frowns at him, “why the hell do you care about the fish guy?” he asks as the man takes an egg gingerly from the side of the pond.
“Because he’s nice. He doesn’t seem to care much that I’m black,” he says. He listens to Rhodey, he knows this because he once gave a suggestion for getting that collar off and he followed Rhodey’s suggestions immediately. There was no hesitation, no condescending looks, nothing. He just listened and followed Rhodey’s advice.
“I don’t care if you’re black either,” Sam points out and Rhodey rolls his eyes.
“You’re also black, that doesn’t count. He listens though, and he’s intelligent. Plus they’re torturing him in here, you can’t tell me you’re alright with that,” he says. Sam is a better man than that, Rhodey knows. Off to the side Yinsen lets them work it out while he unpacks some things from a bag.
He goes to hand the mermaid a sandwich before he pulls it back fast, “wait, this has fish in it, is that cannibalism?” he asks more to himself than their current companion but his musing are interrupted by a hand sticking out of the water. Apparently not. Yinsen hands the sandwich over and turns back to Rhodey and Sam. “Are we all in agreement?” he asks and Rhodey turns to Sam, raising an eyebrow.
Sam lets out a soft sigh. “I’m going to regret this,” he mumbles.
*
Rhodey is in too deep with his fish stick but Sam doesn’t want to tell him that. He brings the damn thing lunch every day and its clear that this is an expected activity that, in the fish’s defense, it clearly enjoys. They plan based on Rhodey and Sam’s knowledge of the building and Yinsen’s knowledge of their fishy friend which is, admittedly, not much.
They’re prepared to move the mermaid when it reaches out to Rhodey, gently, holding its hand out. Rhodey frowns at it for a moment before it shakes its head and makes a ‘come here’ gesture that has Sam prepared to launch this thing off a building. Rhodey, damn idiot, goes over though and the fish reaches up and carefully presses its hand to Rhodey’s cheek. Sam lets out a yell when the fucking thing lights up and Rhodey gasps softly. He steps forward to help a guy out but Yinsen holds him back. It takes a few moments but Rhodey pulls back.
“He used to live in the Mediterranean Sea. In our language his name translates roughly to ‘Tony’,” he says. Yinsen gasps softly and Rhodey grins. “I knew you were smarter than Rumlow gave you credit for,” he says.
“Yeah, fuck Rumlow. And honestly fuck this psychic fish, lets just get this thing the hell out of here so we can go back to our regularly scheduled lives,” Sam says, waving a hand around.
“Can you-” Yinsen starts, walking towards Tony but he quickly pulls back, giving Yinsen a suspicious look. Yinsen looks hurt about it but Sam rolls his eyes.
“Dude has been tormented and tortured by scientists, he probably isn’t too keen to let you test out his… powers,” he says. The fish- Tony he guesses- gives him an appraising look then before seemingly approving and swimming away from Yinsen a little and towards Rhodey. Well isn’t that just freaking sweet. He shakes his head and moves the laundry basket closer to the pond.
“Alright fishy, get in the basket,” Sam tells him.
Rhodey gives him an offended look, “you could at least use his name,” he says.
“I don’t care about this fish’s name, I just want to get him out so I can go back to not worrying about being killed by Rumlow or something equally awful,” he says. “So in the basket,” he tells Tony.
Rhodey nods to him and Tony dives back into the water, prompting Sam to make an irritated noise. He resurfaces a few moments later lacking his metal collar though so Sam guesses that disappearance was necessary. They have to help him into the basket, which is only made more difficult by Tony’s clear preference for Rhodey but when Sam spies a few gnarly scars on his body he can see why that trust extends only to one person. They achieve their goal though and that’s when the move onto the second phase of the plan. Getting him through the building.
Thankfully Rhodey pushes the damn cart because Sam is too nervous to do much more than focus on being normal as they move through the halls. They’ve prepared for this of course, but preparation doesn’t do much to actually prepare you for the real thing. They make their way around the final corner when the alarm starts going off and Sam swears along with Rhodey and they start running. Sam all but throws himself in the back of the van, yanking the basket in as Rhodey tries to shove it into place. A gun goes off close to them and Rhodey yells, giving the basket one last shove before they’ve successfully got it in and he slams the doors shut.
Tony sticks his head out of the wet towels he’s currently housed in and Sam shoves his head back into the towels, “don’t stick your head out to be seen! Jesus Christ,” he mumbles just as the lights go out and Rhodey throws himself into the passenger seat.
“A little late,” Yinsen tells Rhodey as he steps on the gas.
“Just on time, we were a little early. I know my way around these systems, I could probably do a better job building them,” he says. Probably is giving the idiots who ran this place way too much credit. Both he and Sam were much smarter than any of the morons hired to work here. It had been easy to rig the system to go black for a solid half an hour while they made their escape. That and if they didn’t black things out they wouldn’t make it past the electronic gate.
*
Releasing Tony had been difficult, especially when they nearly got found twice but they managed. Tony hadn’t wanted to go, lingering way too long looking at Rhodey before he finally takes off into the sea.
*
It takes a long time for him to find Rhodey again and when he does he’s older. He lives by the sea now though so Tony works on getting as close as possible. The first thing he leaves for Rhodey sits there for almost a month before he finally finds it. Its a fluke that his second gift is found within a week, and after the third gift is found Rhodey knows to stick around for awhile.
When Tony finally catches him there he swims over enthusiastically, probably scaring the hell out of the kid he got stuck bringing with him but Peter will stay far enough behind to be safe. He’s heard the stories, seen Tony’s scars, he knows better than to be seen by humans. Rhodey grins when he sees him though and Tony reaches out immediately, pleased when Rhodey leans forward to offer his hand. He pulls Rhodey closer, laughing mostly to himself when Rhodey looks briefly alarmed.
He presses as close as he can, carefully pulling Rhodey’s head towards his own until their foreheads touched. Its a lot easier to do this that way. I’ve been looking for you he thinks at Rhodey.
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Okay, trying once more....
Notes:
I wanted to write a Flint/Hamilton mermaid AU (especially since it is mermay) but this came out first, so I guess it will do for now.
Historical note: bathing in a tub like the one in this story was not super common in the 1700's, but Thomas is an aristocrat and I feel like he would enjoy a good bath so...liberties?
Just try not to think about the poor servents who had to empty the tub.
Work Text:
It is three hours past the appointed meeting time when Lieutenant James McGraw, breathless and jittery with haste, is admitted to the home of Lord Thomas Hamilton and directed to wait in the library for his host. He is alone in the room and takes the opportunity to right himself; London is experiencing a hotter and more oppressively humid spell than is customary for the season. James smoothes the hair from his forehead and back into its orderly que and is nervously fiddling with the wide cuffs of his naval jacket when the library door creaks open.
“Apologies, my Lord—“ he begins before the rustle of silk and a soft purr of acknowledgement gives way to the sight of Miranda, lovely in her grass green gown, gliding to meet him. “James!” She embraces him, kissing his cheek which makes him blush redder now than it did a week ago when the only affair was taking place between themselves. It was somehow a more intimate gesture, that casual kiss, after knowing she had witnessed the glorious and dangerous confession of his love for Thomas. James ducks his head to hide the flush,
“Forgive me, Miranda, I was supposed to have met Thomas three hours past, but duties at the Admiralty kept me detained.”
“Not to worry my dear Lieutenant, Thomas only paced the floor inconsolably for a fraction of the time, sighing like a lovelorn—“
“Miranda!”
“Oh James I tease! You know I do! Come along now; my darling husband has instructed me to fetch you up and bring you to him” her eyes twinkled mischievously, “he is enjoying a brief respite from this damnable heat.” She turned and led a bemused James from the room, up the stairs and down a corridor that as yet, James had only traveled in darkness or in thrilling secrecy. Thoughts of Thomas and Miranda’s bed chamber and the pleasures to be found therein were making James’ breath come faster as he followed Miranda’s green gown down the hall and to the door of a room he had not entered before. She opened the heavy wooden door only a quarter of the way, pausing at the scene within, still blocked to James’ eyes. “He is beautiful, isn’t he?” She stood for a moment with fond, distant eyes before turning and ushering a now dry-mouthed and nervous James into the room.
“Have fun!” he felt her breath warm against his ear before his feet carried him forward and the click of the door shutting behind him punctuated his arrival.
The floor of the room was luxuriously tiled in hues of blue and turquoise, bare of ornament except for the dully gleaming silver tub in the center, in which Thomas Hamilton, pale and glistening with water droplets, reclined. The glottal sound of James forcing himself to swallow seemed a louder noise than should have been possible, almost as loud as the pulse beating reedy in his ears. Thomas opened his eyes, bluer in his current surroundings and brightened by the refraction of light and water and silver playing across his form.
“James! I am so glad you are here! I feared that you would not have time for me today at all.”
“Apologies, my Lord,” James was aware that he was being overly formal with the title, but just now, with Thomas unclothed and wet before him, the distance of the formal title seemed a matter of self-preservation. He cast his eyes about the room restlessly, trying to avoid fixing them on the temptation before him, and doubting that his mental focus could be recovered for the day. “I would not have been kept from you—from our appointment, that is—but at the insistence of Admiral Hennessy—um—that is I was required… required to--”Water rippling alerted James to movement—he realized his eyes had been solidly on the tile at his feet as he rambled.
“There is no need to apologize, I am aware that you have other demands on your time. However I should perhaps offer my apologies to you, it appears I have shocked you. I did not mean to cause you discomfort by receiving you in such an – unconventional—manner. I had arranged for a bath to cool me and I had just stepped in when you arrived. I do hate to waste all this lovely water, and in my eagerness to see you I may have been led by impulse more than propriety.”
James was looking at Thomas now, and as he did so he sensed that Thomas knew exactly what kind of “discomfort” James was currently experiencing. They had kissed—yes—kissed and fumbled and spent in one another’s presence, but James had not yet seen Thomas fully naked, and now that he had the opportunity he felt a thousand fantasies rush through his brain.
“Imagine, you not being led by propriety.” James licked his lips as he made his decision. He approached the tub with intent now, like a man compelled. And he was,came the thought as he fell to his knees by the side of the silver basin and reached for Thomas’ mouth with his own. “You are a siren, Thomas, here to tempt me.”
Thomas drew back to laugh delightedly before reaching his arms over the side to begin working at the jacket his lover wore. “A siren? Are all sailors so easily mislead when it comes to spotting mythical creatures? If so it explains a great many reports of sea monsters and maidens”
“Nonsense” James was free of his coat and rolling up his sleeves. “You are the very picture of a mermaid.”
Thomas’ eyebrow arched in question before drawing James’ hand down into the pleasantly cool water to grasp his hard and quite substantial cock.
“Fine, “James conceded with a light squeeze to the contrary evidence, “a merman then.”
Thomas started to breath more forcefully, and undulate softly in the water, seeking friction and sensation with an abandon that left James in awe.
Watching his lover, James noted the aptness of his comparison. Thomas’ body was pearl-pale, almost luminescent in the in the dappled light of the room. His normally golden blond hair was rain dark, disheveled, while his lips and cheeks flushed shell-pink. The water that covered him from the hips down obscured in such a way that his pale legs curled beneath him could almost have been a silvery tail.
Thomas allowed James to continue stroking him until the pleasure began to build too quickly, at which point he stilled the hand upon him and turned in the water, motioning for James to stand. This alteration put Thomas’ face just at the level of James’ waist. He turned and nuzzled at James’ still clothed lower body, pressing cheek and nose and softly parted lips to the fabric stretched taunt over his lover’s arousal, leaving dark, wet patches that felt incredible against sensitized flesh. James waited breathlessly as Thomas freed his straining erection and considered the length with a kind of fevered calculation.
“Thomas, you can’t mean to—“ James began, but stopped short the moment Thomas placed a soft, open mouthed kiss at the tip. James’ hands went immediately to the rim of the tub, gripping as fiercely as he was able. He had been on the receiving end of this act before—a couple of paid companions at the docks and a fellow sailor or two, back in the days when he was certain enough of his anonymity to engage in such—but Thomas—God! James wasn’t sure his soul wouldn’t leave his very body. Another gentle kiss, bestowed with reverence, and then Thomas was opening wide, engulfing as much of his lover’s cock as he could take in a single go. A keening noise rose from James’ throat. Thus encouraged, Thomas drew back and repeated the motion, sinking down a little further.
“Oh God! Thomas! That feels…fuck, so perfect.”
Thomas groaned in response opening his jaw wider and pausing with James’ tip at the back of his throat. He looked up at James, blue eyes shimmering through water-beaded lashes and swallowed slowly and deliberately. James made a noise that sounded almost tortured and only his iron grip on the silver rim kept him from melting to the floor. Thomas withdrew again, drawing in deep breaths and giving James time to master himself before resuming his worship of his lover’s cock. Deep sucking alternating with slower bobs of the head, and all the while his tongue licked and traced and circled James with a skill born of genuine enthusiasm towards the act.
Trying to prolong the pleasure warred with the desire to spend immediately. A part of James wanted nothing more than to fuck into his lover’s mouth and yield to the building desire to lose all control. In the past, James had not been overly careful with his partners; but Thomas, oh how very different everything was with him. The thought of using him roughly was both blasphemous and exhilarating. Would he allow it? Surely Thomas would not have experienced such treatment before.
As if sensing James’ reluctance, Thomas paused in his motions, pulling off, and then reaching to pry James’ tightly clenched fingers from their grip on the tub. He spent a few moments kissing and then sucking down each finger one at a time, watching the effect on both the face above him and the cock that twitched impatiently just inches from his mouth. Once each finger had been seen to, he placed the hand on the back his head and set his mouth in a soft “O” with the head of James’ cock resting against his lips. He locked eyes with James again, his message flawlessly conveyed.
“Fuck, Thomas.” James was having trouble drawing in enough breath to sustain him. He pushed slowly, watching as his cock disappeared past Thomas’ swollen lips, then he repeated the motion faster, and again, fingers clutching in the short damp strands of hair and forcing his lover’s head down to meet his arousal. ‘It’s too much’ was his last coherent thought as his hips began to flex and push helplessly forward, losing rhythm and restraint.
Thomas was groaning around the hot flesh in in his mouth, fingers pawing at the muscled thighs in front of him as James began to climax. Despite having no intention of pulling off, James’ tight grip on the back of Thomas’ head meant that Thomas could do nothing but swallow frantically around the cock shooting its seed down his throat. Unable to keep up with the volume of his lover’s spend, he sputtered and choked just a bit, his eyes watering and jaw protesting as seed spilled from his lips. The hand on Thomas’ head went from gripping to caressing as the last waves of climax dissipated, and Thomas was able to draw a shaky breath.
James watched in a daze as Thomas cleaned him thoroughly and let him slip from the warm heaven of his mouth when it became too much. “Fuck” he said once more as his legs gave out and he fell back to his knees.
Thomas made a small, needy hum in agreement and shifted so that he was once more reclined in the water, looking paradoxically smug and desperate.
“Please James” he keened, reaching for his lover again.
“What do you need, love?” James asked, purely for the joy of hearing Thomas say it. The feverishly bright eyes, pupils wide and dark, and the pretty coral cock jutting up from the water proclaimed exactly what his lover needed.
“Touch me James! Oh please, I ache for you!”
“What an enchanting siren-song that is,” James replied as he took Thomas in hand. The slide of flesh on flesh with the cool water around in between was a heady feeling, and soon Thomas was gripping the ledge above his head as he moved in time to James’ stroking. Water was lapping out and over the sides, drenching the knees of James’ pants and his discarded coat, but nothing could shift his focus from the writhing siren before him.
“I can imagine spotting you while out at sea, a merman come to lure and bewitch honest sailors into your embrace. I could not resist you,” he shifted to place a kiss against Thomas’ temple, “How could anyone?” came out in a growl as he worked more intensely at his lover’s cock.
Thomas nearly screamed at the more forceful stimulation and began to thrash his head from side to side. “Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.” he chanted bucking into James’ calloused hand. Two more sharp strokes and he was spilling, white pearls across the water’s surface and slipping through James’ fingers.
James watched Thomas fall back against the tub, eyes closed and chest heaving before following suit and collapsing to the floor again. He lay prone there, tepid water soaking into him from the puddles on the tile. Neither of them spoke.
Gradually, James’ mind found its focus, and he rose awkwardly to his feet, wincing at the protest from his aching knees. Sodden garments clung to him and James had no doubt that he made for a very pitiful picture. He was prevented from mentioning this by Thomas, who also seemed to have recovered, and rose without a shred of self-consciousness from the tub.
“Hand me that towel, if you will?” he indicated a cupboard in the corner with a towel and dressing gown hanging on it. “And you will have to get out of those wet clothes immediately. I will fetch you some things of my own and lay yours out to dry.” James did as instructed, remaining silent as Thomas dried off and donned the dressing gown. The last hour felt like something that happened in a dream, and James was afraid of shattering that dream with the wrong words. He knew better than to think that Thomas was unaffected by their trysts, but the sudden and fierce longing that welled up in him, even after (especially after) physical release should have banked that fire, left him wrong-footed. Even now, the thought of wearing his lover’s cloths settled hot in his belly, not lust entirely, but an emotion he feared to examine. Thomas anchored him with a shy hand placed on his now bare shoulder.
“You don’t have to say anything, love.”
James turned to meet Thomas’ gaze. There was understanding in his smile, and a bright hope in his eyes.
James had to kiss him again.
“ I cannot say anything, I don’t know how to say it, but –“
Thomas nodded into the shared breath of their kisses, “I understand”
And James believed that he did.
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