#i start feeling marginally better from the vaccine and my one brain cell is immediately like ok time for sadness and angst

[sexyglances]

In the Half My Life MV, in the beginning the story is framed as Whale falling from the sky. A visual metaphor that I haven't seen mentioned yet, is how, when they're at the costume dance party, both Whale and Talay are dressed as Batman and Robin, two characters that are based on creatures that can fly. And Whale and Talay were having fun--so much fun--feeling happy and free and like they could soar together. But those were just costumes that mere men wore as disguises. These costumes could not cover up who they truly were inside, that the men who wore them would never be able to actually fly. After all, it was Whale who was trying to escape something that made him fall--not fly--into Talay's life.

So when Talay turned his attention from Whale and towards the possibility of another romantic interest, it made Whale feel like he was falling again, that he needed to escape into solitude again. So isn't it fitting that Whale went as low as he could go, he literally went underground into an empty, drained swimming pool. A whale should feel at home in the water, but Whale found the one place that should be full of water but was devoid of it. A place that would make an actual whale feel claustrophobic; the claustrophobia only amplified by the sounds of the open water lapping up on the shore that could be heard in the background. But Whale thought that maybe the claustrophobia could be comforting, maybe he could ignore the sound of the open surf beckoning him away, ignoring how the world always told him he didn't deserve a way home, but a way out. If he retreated far enough, went low enough, he could escape the weight that the fear of loss was pressing down onto his chest.

And then Talay shows up above him in his superhero garb, full of smiles and relaxation, bringing his camaraderie down to where Whale was wallowing. And maybe this was his way of rescuing Whale from his solitude once again. After all it was Talay putting his hands on Whale's face, it was Talay looking into Whale's eyes, it was Talay putting his head on Whale's shoulder. Was this him promising a companionship beyond friendship to Whale? The idea seemed impossible but also made his heart fly, so before he could talk himself out of it, Whale tried reaching for it, tried to manifest his soaring hope into reality.

But no, he asked for too much from this world. Whale tried asking for more and was once again told that he wasn't allowed to ask for anything. He can't ask people to be with him because he is the embodiment of a soul destined to be alone lest he be abandoned first. He lept towards Talay, wishing for a brief moment he could fly, but then he smacked hard onto reality. He wished for too much again. He cannot forget his life is only meant for solitude. And so Whale was left in that empty swimming pool, alone, in a place that would surely suffocate any whale just trying to survive, let alone breathe freely and fully. He's left with the bitter reminder that whales cannot fly into others' lives, but instead they're meant to swim away, letting their calls fade away into vast depths of the ocean.

#half my life mv #half of my life mv #idek what the correct name is whoops #earthmix #whaletalay #my meta #meta #i start feeling marginally better from the vaccine and my one brain cell is immediately like ok time for sadness and angst