#i thank you again for writing this series and u r probably sick of me saying that but. nghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[garoujo]

i just wanted to say a huge thank you for not only reaching 20k followers right at the end of the year but also 4 all of the kindness i’ve been shown on this blog ! fank yew 4 letting me have this little corner of the internet as a little safe space ^_^

i wanted to do my own sort of ‘year in review’ i guess so i could kind of throw a spotlight on all of my favourite fics / blogs / artists that have rly added to my time here with everything they do <3 if you’re not included pls don’t take it personally i hav smol brain + also couldn’t involve everyone since theres so many !

WRITING SPOTLIGHT 2022

a small list of all of my favourite pieces of writing i’ve read this year, mostly for my favourite blorbos <3 please read the warnings before proceeding on creators blogs + b4 reading !!!

WHATS TAKING A LIFE OR TWO [IF IT MEANS GETTING TO KEEP YOU] — hanma shuji. ( @hijackser ) this is my absolute FAVOURITE SERIES PERIOD. obviously i’m actually insane 4 hanma but no this series made me EVEN MORE INSANE ! i’ve reread it an insane amount of times, i think about it 24/7. it is my favourite piece of writing to even exist.

SHOW OFF — hanma shuji ( @killsaki ) dallas is probably sick of me talking about this fic but ILL NEVER BE OVER IT ! favourite stand alone shuji fic ever ! everything about it is soooo perfect n so insanely him i could cry <3 absolute favourite shuji fic in the world.

ABSENTEE LOVER — hanma shuji ( @shoyoist ) ive read this an absolutely criminal amount, words cannot DESCRIBE !!! how much i love it like it has such a special place in my heart i adore him in this ! rekha never disappoints w the shuji content <3

CLOUD 9 AND SICK DAY — nagi seishiro ( @iitoshi ) everytime kai writes nagi i absolutely eat it up + these little drabbles are on my mind literally always !!! i will never be able to get enough w how well he’s written here EVER !!!

BLLK BOYS WORKING IN A PIERCING SHOP — multiple. ( @pinteukr ) i literally just read this, specifically nagi’s part but i HAD to include it because i was a MESS !!! ABSOLUTELY DONE !!! it is so good + this imagery / au is EVERYTHING 2 ME <3

PROPOSAL — nagi seishiro ( @tcshi ) i read this a few days ago + it’s still on my mind constantly hes just SO IN CHARACTER ! EVERYTHING IS SOOOO RIGHT !!! would reread one million times after !!! infact i’ll reread right after writing this !!!

WHEN THEY GET JEALOUS — multiple bllk characters ( @lalunanymph ) SO GOOD !!! SO CRAZY !!! nagi’s part had my toes curling n my feet kicking like akajakaka dawn !!!! i literally ate up every character honestly i’d read anything from u <3

SUGARSTREAM — gojo satoru ( @satorhime ) THIS FIC CHANGED THE TRAJECTORY OF MY WHOLE EXISTENCE !!! literally thee reason i became like actually unhinged 4 gojo satoru . it changed me down 2 the core it’s TOO GOOD !!! FOR FREE TOOO ????

BLOG SPOTLIGHT 2022

a small list of some of my favourite blogs who are also amazing writers + i recommend with my whole heart ! again i can’t include everyone but just know ily <3 again please read warnings byf !!!

@saetoshis + @goroushis — multifandom [+ genshin writing blog] nsfw + dc !

@getoswhore — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@bbiemilk — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@tetsutits — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@alhaithms — multifandom. nsfw !

@anantaru — genshin impact . nsfw + slight dc !

@blueparadis — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@itoshi-s — blue lock. nsfw + dc !

@ilykento — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@r-oronoa — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@touyyes — mostly jjk but multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@510hz — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@starlitheaven — jjk + hxh. nsfw + dc !

@torufilms — blue lock. sfw + nsfw !

@sailewhoremoon — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@dilu3 — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@shirohyorin — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@saneminx — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@takaholic — multifandom. nsfw + light dc !

@haruchiyos — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@satorini — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

@ohsatori — multifandom. sfw + nsfw !

@suget — mostly jjk. nsfw + dc !

@bleubrri — multifandom. nsfw + dc !

ARTIST SPOTLIGHT 2022

a small list of the artists who i follow + love seeing on my dash ! they’re just so crazy talented it’s insane <3

@tinymaru — reine is the one who drew my emmie x nagi fanart in my header and they are so craaaazy talented <3

@kita-dynasty — laine is SO AMAZING !!! every single time she posts i eat it up i could look at her art all day !!!

@omiishii — i’ve followed jace for YEARS ! and he only gets even better it’s actually insane !!! it’s just so amazing to see their art whenever i’m on dash <3

@omiyours — remi made my theme for me + she is so CRAZY TALENTED i just think she deserves absolutely everything 4 sharing it with people and being so kind <3

if you don’t want 2 be tagged pls let me know + i can take you out but i just wanted 2 do a little round up and also thank everyone 4 all the support they’ve shown me on this lil blog of mine <3 i am so very grateful ! again if i’ve not included u i’m super sorry there were so many !!! I STILL LOVE U I SWEAR !!! yay 2 2022 tho >_<

#໒꒱ ₊˚ — recs ! #I TRIED 2 INCLUDE EVERYONE BUT I EAT UP EVERYTHING SERVED 2 ME ILY ALL <3 #if ur not included pls know that i still love u w my whole heart !!! I SWEAR !!! #but fank yew everyone 4 all of the support + you all being super kind #and also 4 letting me scream all over ur dash aboht my 2d bfs how embarrassing 4 me but hello o_o

[gh0stlymoth]

[ID: digital drawing of a Jon and Martin from tma, depicting a scene from the fanfic “A Reprieve”. The two of them are sitting snuggled up on the floor in Jons library. Jon is a tall godly being with long wavy brown hair streaked with grey, a bit of stubble and scars scattered across his face and neck. He is wears what looks like a dark green robe. He has a purple blanket draped over his shoulder and martins’ shoulder, the blanket falling over martins’ legs. Martin is a fat man with freckles across his visible skin, and short, white curly hair and a bit of stubble. He is wearing circular glasses, a red lightly patterned shirt, and dark red pants. he is leaning on Jon’s shoulder, while Jon in turn has his head rested on martins, and holding up a book, reading it to jon. Both look content and at peace. There are several moths flying around them, some resting on jon shoulder or martins’ hand. Behind them is a row of a variety of library books. The drawing has a fuzzy edge to it. END ID]

So a while back, I drew a fanart for @dickwheelie amazing amazing Paladin/angel au, but because this series has lived in my head rent free for almost a year now, I drew another one. This time a small scene from “A Reprieve” because I read that scene and my brain went vroom. Jons library always is a little fuzzy in my head with it being on another plane and all and i tried to incorporate that a bit. 

I once again ask you to read this series, it’s ngh it’s arhgg it’s god it’s so good.

#the magnus archives #tma #jmart #jonmartin #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #paladin au #gonna be honest i am real proud of this one. #before i start rambeling in the tags a daily reminder to read this fic!!! #u might ask yourself why i choose this scene #it's because i am a huge fucking sap and nthg gets me like martin reading aloud to jon #i just had a really cozy image in my head when i read this ok #also because for other scenes i don't want to draw them i want to animate them sjfsgkgs #u can all be lucky that i have no skills in animation. yet. #anyway i took 3 artistic liberties with this: 1. jon takes the purple blanket from the prev fic because cozy #2. i made martins shirt less vibrant because the red was really vibrant #and 3. jon tided up some books form him and martin to sit which is why this doesn't look as messy as jons library would be. #also i wanted to honor the superior jon design by giving him his moustache but i couldn't make it fit ): #forgive me gwyneth #i thank you again for writing this series and u r probably sick of me saying that but. nghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[tempestaurora]

FANDOMS: Marvel, Voltron: Legendary Defender, The 100, Harry Potter, The Raven Cycle, Community, Avatar: The Last Airbender, The Umbrella Academy

NOTES:

i tagged every tumblr i could reasonably find. if you have more than one fic on this list, i have tagged you more than once. some people may be tagged like five times. i’m not sorry.

where relevant, fandoms have been split into general (platonic) centric fics, and romantic/slash fics. this is just because it’s easier than splitting it up into specific relationships.

at the end of every fic title/author line is a list of core relationships; fics are split between gen and romance depending on what relationship is considered centric. otherwise, fics are in no particular order. All fics are completed unless otherwise specified.

i added a read more because there’s over 100 fics listed here.

anyway, enjoy, thanks for the 3k followers

M A R V E L

gen centric fics

SHORT (0 - 5K)

K.I.D. by blondsak @blondsak | Tony&Peter

summary: “Hi K.I.D. Glad you’re awake. Do you know your primary objective?”

“To always look for ways to remind Mister Stark - that’s you! - that Kindness Isn’t Dead.”

“That’s right, K.I.D. Good job.” 

forty miles by peter_stank @peter-stank

summary:  the one where Morgan is sick and Tony is in way over his head, so he calls his spiderson for a little bit of help. Tony&Peter

from now on by peterparkr @peterparkrr |  Tony&Peter

summary: Peter’s sure that Tony and Pepper’s wedding will change everything. 

Machine Wash Hot; Tumble Dry Low by alice_in_ink | Tony&Peter

summary: Do you ever fall into sewers and then need your billionaire mentor to wash your super-suit? Peter Parker does too. 

Captain That by maddo | Tony&Peter

summary: Just a bunch of little anecdotes regarding our favourite spider and his Instagram account, feat. a meme-tastic Tony Stark.

Here's to all the new beginnings by Gruoch @groo-ock | Tony&Peter

summary: Peter gets a job. Tony is less than pleased. 

to know, to protecc, and to fuck with by peterstank and floweryfran @peter-stank @floweryfran | Tony&Peter, Natasha&Peter, Sam/May

summary: peter parker convinces the responsible adults in his life to join him on the world’s stupidest stake-out. 

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

i used to have nothing and then by dirgewithoutmusic @ink-splotch | Clint&Natasha

summary: “Clint,” Natasha said. “You’ve got to let me go.”

“Clint,” she said, and he let her go. 

the hearth by sagemb |  Tony&Peter

summary: What to Do When Your Wife Is Out of the Country: A Guide by Tony Stark

1) Gain partial custody of a child 2) Sleep on the couch 3) Have the child gain partial custody of you.

Love in Ones and Zeroes by forensicleaf @forensicleaf | Tony&Peter

summary: a boy, a bot, and a bond through the years. Tony&DUM-E

call you home SERIES by Madelinedear | May&Tony, Tony&Peter

summary: sometimes family is who you're born with. and sometimes family is a spider boy, a rich not-dad, and a kickass aunt. (or; tony, may, and peter find a place in each other's lives) 

Not-Uncle Tony by Jen27ny @jen27ny | Tony&Peter, Happy&Peter

summary: Happy is Peter's biological father, and Tony is there for the entire ride. 

Between how it is and how it should be by frostysunflowers @frostysunflowers | Peter&Bucky, Tony&Peter, Steve&Bucky

summary: ''Doesn’t Captain Rogers ever…wonder,'' Peter winced as he fumbled for the right word, ''where you are?''

Bucky smirked. ''Steve’s a regular mother hen. Used to be me that worried about him.'' He gave Peter a pointed look. ''Better question is, isn’t Stark wondering where you are?''

The Unfortune Teller by peterparkr @peterparkrr | Tony&Peter

summary: A woman in a carnival booth predicts Peter's death. 

all the things yet to come (are the things that have passed) by peterparkr @peterparkrr | Peter&Morgan, Tony&Peter

summary: The first time Peter sees Morgan is at the funeral. 

tony and peggy’s big day out! by floweryfran @floweryfran | Tony&Peggy

summary: “What’s happened this time?”

“Just a bombing,” says Peggy.

“At three in the afternoon?” says Jarvis. “Frankly, how rude.”

Blips on the Record by ambivalentangst @ambivalentmarvel | Flash&Peter, Tony&Peter

summary: Flash Thompson’s story is not simple, Peter Parker can always use someone else in his corner, and secrets are had and protected by all. 

aiding and abetting: a peter parker saga by floweryfran and peterstank @floweryfran @peter-stank | Peter&Avengers

summary: 5 times peter parker runs into the rogues separately + the 1 time they work together as a team. 

Tennessee Outreach for Spider-Man (and friends) by ciaconnaa @ciaconnaa | Harley&Peter, Harley&Tony

summary: in an attempt to help Harley beef up his college apps, Tony offers Harley a remote Stark Industries internship to help Spider-Man. It easily becomes his worst nightmare. 

Allston Christmas by Gruoch @groo-ock | Tony&Peter, Tony&Peter&Rhodey

summary: “You guys didn’t have to do this,” Peter says from where he sits squeezed into the middle seat of the U-Haul, sweat running down his back. The air-conditioning in the truck they’ve rented is broken, and even with the windows rolled down it’s hellishly hot inside.

“We wanted to,” Tony replies as he blasts the horn at a minivan with a “Harvard Mom” bumper sticker that is attempting to cut into his lane.

so happy together by floweryfran @floweryfran | Tony&Ben

summary: ben parker calling tony stark a twink for 13k words

LONG (20K+)

An Unofficial Introduction to the Avengers SERIES by Isnt_it_pretty_to_think_so @isnt-it-pretty-to-think-so-tr | Tony&Peter

summary: The Avengers meet Spiderman via the online world, and then meet Peter Parker in Stark's living room. It takes them longer than it should to put two-and-two together. 

what is and will be (is you and me) by momentofmemory @momentofmemory | May&Peter

summary: 5 times May was there for Peter, +1 time he was there for her. 

dear mr. fantasy by iron_spider @iron--spider | Tony&Peter

summary: He grits his teeth and turns around, and before he can even begin to trudge over towards Peter’s room, he’s stopped in his tracks. By a door. In the middle. Of the living room.

“Well that’s new,” he says, still rooted to the spot.

timshel SERIES by justanotherblond @blondieewritess | Bucky&Peter, Steve/Bucky

summary: The soldier doesn’t remember his son’s birth or how he came to be. He doesn’t remember bedding a woman and watching her belly swell, but they said the boy was his. He does know that he will protect and teach the boy within the confines of their cell walls. Even when the handlers berate him. Even when the good guys take him away. 

odd couple buddies SERIES by bysine | Peter&Bucky, Sam&Thor, Tony&Peter

summary: "You know you're not supposed to call him the Winter Soldier any more, right?" Peter says, while they handcuff him to a pipe. A pipe. "Also this whole thing is kind of messing up my schedule. My two overdue papers won't exactly write themselves."

i understand (i’m a liability) by floweryfran @floweryfran | Harley&Tony, Harley&Peter

summary: “I… am not being challenged in the right ways here,” Harley says slowly, carefully.

“Then move here,” Tony says, and Harley’s heart drops straight into his feet. 

Roundabout by Gruoch @groo-ock | Tony&Peter

summary: In which Peter attempts to survive long enough to graduate, Tony moonlights as a semi-professional party planner, and absolutely nothing goes according to plan. 

Uncle Steve's Fix-it Freelance Gig (and friends) SERIES by whowhotellsyourstory | Steve&Morgan, Tony&Steve, Bucky&Peter

summary: "You ever need help, and I'm not there-""Why wouldn't you be there?""You call Uncle Steve."

notes: probably my favourite post endgame fix it fic/series in existence

Dumpster Fires Verse SERIES by deniigiq @deniigi | Peter&Wade&Matt

summary: A collection of Team Red stories because they are all hot messes. Except Peter. Two-Thirds of them are hot messes.

Impression, Sunrise by ciaconnaa @ciaconnaa | Peter&Morgan

summary: In Peter Parker's eyes, Morgan Stark is a lot of things: a terrible pancake chef, a top notch negotiator, the world's cutest six-year old. But above all, she is his family. He hopes he's enough. 

The Room Where It Happens by notapartytrick @notaparty-trick | Tony&Peter

summary: At 7:36 pm on the 12th of May 2016, Tony Stark is put in the Room.

A twelve-by-twelve-foot shed, soundproofed, double locked. It becomes his home. It has to be, because there’s nowhere else.

At 4:22 pm on the 15th of June 2017, Peter Parker is put in the Room.

They make a living under duress, fearing at every moment the entry of their captor. Confinement halts their lives in their tracks, changes them both for good: breaks them and brings them together simultaneously.

“If someone has everything they need, but nobody, do they have everything? Or nothing?”

romance centric fics

SHORT (0 - 5K)

written in the star(war)s by ciaconnaa @ciaconnaa | Peter/Michelle

summary: Michelle looks at the nurse one more time, and despite the evidence, asks, “Are you sure it’s twins?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” the nurse points them out again. “One boy, and one girl. Due...May 4th.”

It only takes Michelle 2.3 seconds to realize the horror of that sentence. 

Steve Rogers is (Not) A Good Influence by stevergrsno @stevergrsno |  Steve/Bucky, Steve&Peter

summary: Steve Rogers' American Tour Of Waiting For His Brainwashed Boyfriend To Come Back And Blowing Up Hydra is interrupted when Tony Stark dumps Peter Parker into his lap.

Captain ‘Socialist Rage Muffin’ America by mybrotherharry @baffledkingcomposinghallelujah | Steve/Tony, Steve/Tony/Bucky

summary: It takes three months of dating Steve Rogers for Tony to understand why Aunt Peggy once shot at him in sheer frustration.Alternately titled, Honey, I committed treason again. 

Soft Spot for the Hell Raisin' Boy by ifeelbetter @ifeelbetterer | Steve/Bucky

summary: The Winter Soldier takes an interest in Sam Wilson. Bucky Barnes wants to tell him how to be Steve Rogers's best friend.

Cat’s Cradle by Traincat @traincat | Peter/Felicia

summary: The test was positive.

Felicia tilted it idly this way and that, sitting on the bathroom floor with her back against the cupboard. The floors and the counter tops were marble, and the shower door was glass. Every one of Felicia’s moves seemed to echo in the large room, even though she knew that she was making no sound.

The test was positive. She didn’t bother to check the box to make sure she’d gotten the little symbols right. She’d known before she took it.

“Well,” she breathed out, tilting her head back to inspect the ceiling. “Damn, Spider.”

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

cross this river to the other side by defcontwo | Steve/Bucky

summary: In 1943, the Howling Commandos wrote goodbye letters to be given to their loved ones in the event of their deaths.In 2014, Sharon Carter finds those letters in a tin can in an abandoned HYDRA base. 

Tony Stark Googled The Thing by mybrotherharry @baffledkingcomposinghallelujah | Tony/Pepper, Tony&Peter

summary: When Morgan is six months old, Pepper goes back to work and Tony takes over as stay-at-home dad. Discovering the mommyblogosphere is the inevitable next step.

Winter Soldier Program by NocturneByChopin | Steve/Bucky

summary: Here’s the thing: he’s got a bit of a secret. It involves a boy that went and became famous when Steve wasn’t looking. 

i was found and now i don't roam these streets by hipsterchrist | Steve/Bucky

summary: Bucky relearns himself and how to be on a team, the rest of the Avengers try to get answers, and everyone watches too much Criminal Minds. 

Between a Rock and a Hard Place by ciaconnaa @ciaconnaa | Michelle/Peter, Michelle&Happy, Tony&Peter

summary: Ever since her mother died a few years back, Michelle's relationship with her father became strained in their grief. One night, after she's forced to show up at Peter's covered in bruises and in need of stitches, she remembers that even the most unsuspecting dormant volcanoes can erupt.

Brooklyn by togina @toli-a | Steve/Bucky

summary: "Captain America, what's your stance on gay marriage?"

Everyone knows that, by now. Everyone but Bucky.

Steve Rogers at 100: Celebrating Captain America on Film by eleveninches, febricant, hellotailor, M_Leigh, neenya, tigrrmilk | Steve/Bucky

summary: Steve and Bucky find out Hollywood has been busy since they went away. A historical survey, including but not limited to: one set of exploded genitals, a brief interlude in France, Mel Gibson and other masterworks of casting, eight Academy awards, several dinosaurs, and something Tony Stark has ominously dubbed “the masterpiece.” Art included.

Project: Get Bucky Barnes a Dog by ruxian | Steve/Bucky

summary: Bucky Barnes does not have a dog. Bucky Barnes does not want a dog. Sam thinks that should change. Bucky does not agree. 

On My Radar by sprinkle_of_cinnamon | Steve/Bucky

summary: The Winter Soldier first noticed it when he was on the helicarrier.

The blonde’s shoulders were broad, incredibly broad.

They stretched the blue uniform in a wide span, drawing down to a narrow waist. It was a distinctly triangular silhouette. It was entirely improbable. And somehow it was strangely familiar.

The Winter Soldier raised his gun and fired. He didn’t have time for distractions, or Steve Rogers’ shoulders. 

LONG (20k+)

despite the threatening sky and shuddering earth (they remained) by praximeter @praximeter | Steve/Bucky

summary: “Those are pins,” Steve realized. He looked over at Hill. “The mask—it’s nailed to his face.” 

notes: may i say a massive fucking HOLY SHIT??????????? incredible. iconic. life-changing.

United States v. Barnes, 617 F. Supp. 2d 143 (D.D.C. 2015) by fallingvoices and radialarch | Steve/Bucky

summary: The Associated Press @AP Winter Soldier set to stand trial for Washington D.C. massacre and treason apne.ws/1og6SWE 

Bucky Barnes: Former Disney Channel Star SERIES by mambo @whtaft | Steve/Bucky

summary: "The question the entertainment world is asking themselves today is... Who is Steve? Hollywood superstar Bucky Barnes was spotted at a wrap-party last night, serenading someone named Steve onstage.” 

Not Easy Conquered SERIES by dropdeaddream and WhatAre Fears | Steve/Bucky

summary: In 1945, Steve Rogers jumps from a nosediving plane and swims through miles of Arctic Ocean to a frozen shore.

In 1947, Steve Rogers marries Peggy Carter.

In 1966, the New York Times finds the lost letters of Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes.

notes: if you’ve read stucky, you’ve read this series. i know this. just like i know that its the most GODDAMN BEAUTIFUL series ever written. no topping it. it’s number 1.

Strays by snarklyboojum @snarklyboojum | Steve/Bucky

summary: After finding himself alone for the first time in decades, the Winter Soldier learns how to be a person again. Mostly through caring for an orphaned kitten, countless rounds of YouTube roulette, and stalking Captain America. 

hold me until we crumble by queenklu @queenklu | Steve/Bucky

summary: “Sam told me you were watching Antiques Roadshow,” Natasha says, shaking out her hair. “I assumed it was a national emergency.”

notes: one of my favourite standalone fics i’ve ever read

half awake in a fake empire SERIES by idrilka | Steve/Bucky

summary: In the aftermath of Steve's return to the world of the living and the battle of New York, the academia and the Internet react.

by the river potomac i sat down and wept by peterstank @peter-stank | Steve/Bucky

summary: bucky barnes atones.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell SERIES by AnnaFugazzi | Steve/Bucky

summary: Captain America and Bucky Barnes were like brothers. Everyone knew that. 

Out of the Dead Land by orphaned account | Steve/Bucky

summary: Someone is building machines that look and act like people.

Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier tries to be Bucky Barnes.

V O L T R O N:  L E G E N D A R Y  D E F E N D E R

romance centric fics

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

called out your name (but it was too late) by arahir @arahir | James/Keith, Shiro/Keith

summary:  An old classmate watches Keith fall in love with someone else. 

so much for the after party by arahir @arahir | Shiro/Keith

summary: Shiro gets his groove back.

i breathe disaster by arahir @arahir | Shiro/Keith

summary: After the wedding, Keith leaves Earth in search of something he can keep. 

notes: what doES THIS M E AN?!!!??!!?!?! i cried over this ending. i cr i e d. actual real tears. it was so upsetting somehow. and i am so confused. and i went and found the author’s imagined ending in the comments to help understand the open one and it just made me SADDER. i think this is one of those fics that tries to teach me to read the tags and back away at the word “angst”. anyway, excellent, everything i’ve read from this author was incredible

LONG (20K+)

Alien Sex Fiend by Glossolalia | Shiro/Keith | WIP

summary: It started at a drive-in in the 1980s. Unfortunately, this is a love story; a love story about the frontman of Quantum Queef, a punk band, and a boy who rides a red motorcycle. Also, they fight aliens. 

notes: i’m OBSESSED with this fic. i have read it many times. shiro as a punk singer of a band called Quantum Queef????????? and the fact that it’s the only fic on this account???? absolute POWER MOVE.

T H E  1 0 0

romance centric fics

SHORT (0 - 5K)

golden gunned girls by littlearrows | Bellamy/Clarke

summary:  They’re not good girls. They have no reason to be. 

notes: i think about this fic approximately twice a week despite reading it five years ago. there’s a song called gold gun girls by metric that makes me absolutely feral and would be the dream theme song for the intro sequence of the girl gang tv show of my dreams

and then my soul saw you by synchronicities | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Lexa tells Clarke that love within the cluster is the worst kind of narcissism. Bellamy begs to differ. Sense8 AU.

givers prove unkind by emullz | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: a modern au in which bellamy is in a band, he writes an album about clarke, and she is his ophelia. also, marriage.

she sounds like sex on the radio by lecornergirl | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: “Wait, hold on,” Clarke says. “Are you suggesting I—in the booth?” But her tone is a lot sterner than she feels. Against her better judgement, she’s into it. 

notes: idk what to tell you. i have only bookmarked like three smut fics in my life. it deserves it ok.

the kids aren’t alright by opensummer | Multiple Relationships

summary: The Pacific Rim fusion seven ways. 

notes: probably???? my favourite? pacific rim au? i’ve ever read??? does so much with so little

Haven’t You Heard? The World is Coming To An End by Jenye @likcoln-blog | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: So where would you rather die? Here or in Jaeger? Pacific Rim AU. 

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

three points (where two lines meet) SERIES by PinkCanary | Bellamy/Clarke/Raven

summary: Clarke wears the two names on her skin like a badge of honour. 

Icarus Lives by karusarchive @cluelesskaru | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: No one could ever have predicted the kaiju were coming.  Clarke Griffin was in need of a new Co-Pilot. Bellamy Blake had just graduated. You can guess how that goes.

notes: if anyone knows me at all, they know i’m a MASSIVE pacific rim fan. like, own all the books and graphic novels and have multiple pacrim t-shirts kind of fan. THIS FIC was my first experience with that franchise. my first ever. i watched the movie BECAUSE of this fic.

Pony Regrets SERIES by Chash @ponyregrets | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Octavia drags Bellamy to a My Little Pony tournament. Bellamy is deeply upset about the whole thing, but then the girl running the tournament is really cute.

The Internet Is Forever SERIES by Chash @ponyregrets | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Apparently, the internet has been shipping Bellamy Blake (of Team Arkade) and Clarke Griffin (of Craven Cosplay). No one told Bellamy about it. 

Nothing Like Old Times by LayALioness @filmnoirsbian | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: “Clarke killed some guy and stuffed him in the trunk,” Jasper says delightedly. “Your cousin’s dark, dude.”

“Yeah,” Bellamy nods, trying to backtrack. Sometimes he wishes she was actually better at making things up. “She’s a…closeted Goth.” Terminator AU. 

the feel-good hit of the summer by disco_vendetta @errorofyourways | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Clarke Griffin and Bellamy Blake are sleeping together. (aka ROCK BAND AU) 

notes: i think about this fic an OBSCENE amount. it’s been five years since i first read it.

LONG (20K+)

Your Mess Is Mine by monroeslittle @argyledpenguin | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: modern AU, Clarke grows up with Octavia, and Octavia's brother. 

notes: the fic that got me into fan fic in the first place. top tier. 42k.

Love Will Come Through by monroeslittle @argyledpenguin | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: AU. Clarke winds up in an arranged marriage with Bellamy. 

Neeeeeeeeeerds by Chash @ponyregrets | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Clarke joins the Junior Classical League for two reasons: to appease her mother and to annoy Bellamy Blake.

Our Time Now SERIES by TazmainianDevil | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: The Ark may have been short on all resources vital to sustaining life but one thing they never ran out of was guns.On an Ark that has always been defined by violence, Jake Griffin manages to save his daughter's life and Clarke joins a gang to change the world.

Disney Channel You by Chash @ponyregrets | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Bellamy only goes to the open casting for Clarke Griffin's new Disney Channel show because Octavia begs him. He never thought he'd actually get the stupid part. 

And You Understand Now Why They Lost Their Minds and Fought the Wars by marauders_groupie @marauders-groupie | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Clarke doesn’t understand why they say that soulmates are one soul in two bodies. Her soul has five other bodies and she would give her life for any of them. Sense8 AU. 

notes: probably my favourite sense8 AU i’ve ever read?? and i have read Many

build this fire higher, higher toward the sky SERIES by adelicatepeach | Bellamy/Clarke

summary: Clarke's jaeger goes down on a Thursday. Pacific Rim AU. 

H A R R Y  P O T T E R

gen centric fic

LONG (20K+)

yer a wizard, dudley by dirgewithoutmusic @ink-splotch | Dudley&A Lot of People

summary: Minerva fished in her pocket without looking, because the only things allowed in her pockets were only ever exactly what she needed. “I've come to deliver this,” she said, “because Hogwarts by-laws require a professor to hand-deliver acceptance letters to Muggleborn families for their explanation and comfort." 

notes: i have only ever cared about two harry potter fics in my life. this is one of them.

the family evans by dirgewithoutmusic @ink-splotch | Petunia&A Lot of People

summary: What if, when Petunia Dursley found a little boy on her front doorstep, she took him in? Not into the cupboard under the stairs, not into a twisted childhood of tarnished worth and neglect—what if she took him in? 

notes: this is the other one

T H E  R A V E N  C Y C L E

gen centric fic

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

Helter Skelter by Anonymous | Ronan&Blue

summary: In hindsight, a road trip with your step-brother and his best friends in Gansey's dying Pig is not an ideal way to start summer break. Sargent-Lynch siblings AU.

meet hennessy by izzylizardborn @gaybluesargent | Hennessy&Jordan

summary: Hennessy had seen movies. She knew how this went. When it came to clones, there was always a good one and an evil one. She didn’t need to wonder which was which.

life is not a movie, maybe by coyotesuspect | Ronan&Blue

summary: Ronan gets kicked out of Aglionby and enrolls at Mountain View High for his senior year. The only problem is, no one remembers to tell Blue. 

Honeymoon by vexmybones | Ronan&Blue

summary: Blue and Ronan living together, no buffers, no bullshit, this is how they cope. 

the bugs and alphabet by Pi @rhea314 | Ronan&Blue

summary: In which Blue babysits Chainsaw, Ronan & Blue make angry art projects, and some conversations are almost had. 

romance centric fic

SHORT (0 - 5K)

Pretty Good, Right? by suddensingularity | Ronan/Blue

summary: Blue wants to have sex before her true love dies. Ronan helps out. Ronan/Blue

notes: yeah ok this is one of the three smut fics i’ve bookmarked its fun ok

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

It Had To Be You by shinealightonme @toast-the-unknowing | Ronan/Adam

summary: Ronan hates basically everything about their business, or that's what he tells Blue, but the worst part is that he's constantly meeting cute guys and none of them are single. 

darling, don’t make such a drama by shinealightonme @toast-the-unknowing | Ronan/Adam, Ronan&Henry, Ronan&Declan

summary: "Straight answers are boring," Cheng says, "and yes I do mean that for all values of straight. I do not need Ronan to share his tragic backstory, I would much rather deduce it on my own."

"Who says I have a tragic backstory?"

"With your fearsome glower and troubled good looks? If you did not have a tragic backstory it would be a waste."

 C O M M U N I T Y

romance centric fic

LONG (20k+)

Playing House by itsactuallycorrine @itsactuallycorrine | Jeff&Annie

summary: Six years ago, Jeff let Annie go. She never returned to Greendale, and he moved on. Now, he's a single dad to a one-year-old and he needs her help.

A V A T A R:  T H E  L A S T  A I R B E N D E R

gen centric fic

SHORT (0 - 5K)

call it dreaming by ciaconnaa @ciaconnaa | Toph&Gaang

After the war, Toph has nightmares. The screeching of metal, Sokka and Suki's screams, the snap of Sokka's leg as it broke from their fall. It's usually his confession that they aren't going to make it that makes her wake up in a cold sweat. She's anxious all the time now, unable to find peaceful sleep.

The cure is apparently to try and hold all of her friends hands for all hours of the days and hope that they're cool with it. 

what’s in a name by ciaconnaa @ciaconnaa | Toph&Sokka

summary: At her request, Sokka teaches Toph to write her name.

He learns a thing or two about the weight his own name holds in the process.

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

the beginning of a new and brighter birth by aloneintherain @captainkirkk | Zuko&Gaang

summary: “I’m so proud of you, my nephew.” Uncle cups Zuko’s face in his lined hand. The gesture is so tender, his palm so warm, that Zuko has to take a fortifying breath against the sudden swell of emotion in his chest.

“I want to be a good leader, Uncle,” Zuko says. “I want to look after my people.”

“You will,” Uncle says. “You are, nephew.”

In a new era of peace, Zuko works to be a very different Fire Lord than his forefathers.

the scope of blindness series by littlelionlady @thelittlelionlady | Toph&Gaang

summary: There are just some things that Toph's feet can't see.

Her hands can though.

Or, Toph learns what her friends look like by tracing their faces. 

notes: geniunely how goddamn beautiful is this. like. i cried. this is so soft and so cute and it made me feel SO MANY things

All The Gentle Creatures by Haircrescendo @sword-and-stars | Iroh&Zuko

It’s said that you can tell a lot about a person by how they treat animals. Zuko may be loud and stubborn and sharp but all the woodland creatures love him. 

LONG (20K+)

The Family You Choose by TunaFishChris | Zuko&Gaang

summary: Some people are born with soulmarks. Zuko has them, but his grandfather burned them off because they "make you weak."

Team Avatar has a few things to say about that. 

such selfish prayers by andromeda3116 @andromeda3116 | Katara&The Fire Nation, Katara/Zuko

Katara's ambition, so long set aside for the good of others, breaks free and sets fire to her soul. Or, Katara has a vision of her canon future, casts it aside, and becomes a world-changing politician instead. 

and love will be your teacher SERIES by Ford_Ye_Fiji @ford-ye-fiji | Iroh&Zuko

summary: "And you will know the pain of losing a firstborn son." Ozai loses Zuko. Iroh gains a son. And the future changes.

notes: excellent excellent excellent excellent makes me very happy indeed

romance centric fic

SHORT (0 - 5K)

on commitment by jdphoenix | Zuko/Katara

summary: “Just explain it to me again.”

“There is no way you can pass as my brother and we are way too conspicuous as two unrelated people, from different nations, traveling together. So we’re pretending to be married.”

we hold our hearts in silence by psychedelic_aya | Zuko/Katara

summary: Seventy years later, Korra tries to figure out Zuko and Katara. 

oracle bones by orphaned account | Zuko/Katara

summary: The foreign, pictorial characters that bracelet Zuko's left wrist have never been covered in any of his lessons. He cannot read them. And then he turns thirteen, and his father burns his wrist along with his face.

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

late nights/early mornings SERIES by shmulia @shmuliawrites | Zuko/Katara

summary: Whoever set off the fire alarm at 2 in the morning is on Katara’s shit list. Even if he is hot and shirtless. 

the thing about dancing by anodymalion | Sokka/Zuko

summary: The first time a attendant spills Zuko’s tea and doesn’t immediately fall to her knees, begging the Fire Lord’s forgiveness, it is not anger but a resounding warmth that fills his chest.

LONG (20K+)

Fate Deferred by catie_writes_things @catie-does-things | Zuko/Katara | WIP

summary: Aang remains in the iceberg ten years longer. He awakens to a very different world. 

The Sparrowkeet SERIES by audreyii_fic | Zuko/Katara

summary: Ba Sing Se has fallen and Katara has been captured by the Fire Nation; a more adult take on the potential progression of S3. AU series of interconnected one-shots. 

notes: i would die for this series, particularly the last instalment. i enjoyed every single fic and it was just such a GOOD STORY.

T H E  U M B R E L L A  A C A D E M Y 

gen centric fic

SHORT (0 - 5K)

you from yesterday by questors (sieges) @softpunks | Five&Siblings

summary:  The difference between who his siblings once were versus who they are now. 

Ghost Math by pinstripedJackalope | Five&Klaus

summary: Number Five needs a new hobby now that the apocalypse is off. He decides to help Klaus--and in turn maybe he'll help himself. 

Then There Was Two by AnneKatherine | Five&Vanya

summary: Reginald Hargeeves finally decides to allow Grace to name the Academy. Unfortunately, he's only willing to let her name the Academy, which Seven is unfortunately not a part of.

[or how Five gave away his name]

(he definitely didn't want one anyway) 

i tiresias (have foresuffered all) by ThatWeirdGuyInTheBushes | Five&Siblings, Five/Delores

summary: Five misses sharing his birthday, but Five has missed a lot of things.alternatively; number five, coffee, and the art of taking back. 

MEDIUM (5 - 20K)

The Five Vetting Process by jaz_hop | Five&Siblings

summary: In which Five is incredibly invested in the love lives of his siblings, because they're obviously too stupid to choose anyone worthy enough to be their partner. Otherwise known as Five being stupidly over-protective, and incredibly invasive in the hopes of keeping his siblings safe and happy... even if he is being a stalker and a dick about it. 

LONG (20K+)

You and I Together Forever SERIES by Ace_of_Spades_400 @ace-of-spades-400 | Vanya&Siblings

summary: What if it hadn't only been Five, what if it hadn't been Five at all?

A series of stories about what would have happened if Vanya had chosen a different sibling.

Sometimes the choice isn't hers.

Timeliness 1-2.1 SERIES by dgalerab | Hargreeves Siblings

summary: As the world ends, Five takes his siblings back into their child bodies on the day he originally left. With the knowledge of how the world ends fresh in their minds, the Hargreeves siblings do what they can to leave clues for their past selves on how to grow up a little less fucked up before returning to the present.

A present where they all have different lives they can't remember, there's a fun new apocalypse on the way, and Reginald Hargreeves remembers the day where all his children suddenly and inexplicably lost their minds and all respect for him at once a little too well.

Rare Birds SERIES by Cryptix23 | Hargreeves Siblings

summary: An alternate 2019 brings with it new problems and new dangers.

The two sets of Hargreeves children mix like water on a greasefire. It's hard to tell which group is unhappier about the situation -- the Sparrows, trying to navigate the minefield of their new siblings' many traumas, or the Umbrellas, trying to carve their place back into a world that forgot them.

Plus the whole saving-the-world thing hanging over them all.

Whether they like it or not, they're going to have to learn to work together. 

Partners, Parents, or None of the Above by DarkFairytale | Diego&Klaus

summary:  Kenny's mom assuming that Diego and Klaus were A) a couple and B) Number Five’s parents was both bemusing and amusing at the time. But that was because it was the only time it had ever happened. Now though? Now they just can't understand why these misunderstandings keep happening. 

#marvel #tua #atla #hp #the 100

[maggiecheungs]

2020 ~everything~ wrap

i finally have time to do all of the tag games that people have tagged me in over the past month or so! i cannot for the life of me remember who tagged me in which one, so i’m just putting ~everything~ in one huge post. if i tag you anywhere then consider it a standing invitation to do whichever of these you haven’t done :) in fact, this is me issuing a standing invite to any of my followers who wants to do it :) also, thank you all!

Creator Wrap: Favourite Works

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

this collection of philosophy quotes paired with thai bl series, (and its sequel) which is possibly my favourite thing i’ve ever made. for, uh, nerd reasons.

these gifted text post memes i made still make me laugh sometimes

this fic about green from 2gether, which i wrote in the notes app on my phone and published the same day. not my absolute best writing but i am very fond of it <3

i have a bunch fof friend zone dangerous area edits/shitposts which i like, but i’m particularly fond of my fzda as satire headlines (which now has a sequel!)

i also love my crisgood-walmart-lesbian post. i might send it in to gmmtv to try and convince them to do a crisgood-bffs spin-off

+ bonus: since i wrote this list i made this gifset (my first ever!) of jennie panhan in the shipper and i love her too much not to include her on here

+ extra nerdy bonus: this niche meme about Chinese philosophy, which still makes me crack up whenever I think about it

Favourite Creators/Follow Forever

i’ve completely lost track of who’s following who from which blog, so this is just going to be a haphazard, non-exhaustive list of people who i adore/admire/am vaguely intimidated by, mutuality be damned. maybe we talk all the time! maybe we’ve never interacted! maybe i am constantly there in ur tags... lurking... 👀... but if you’re on this list you have made me smile at least once this year and i love you for that alone <3

@wjmild kylie!! you make gifs of arm & tay & lee (separately or in various combinations) & the shipper & and kapook & random fluke pusit cameos & school rangers so i don’t have to <3 ilysm

@janeramida vianey, you have such impeccable taste in general, but your sizzy gifset in particular is so gorgeous it lives in my mind rent free

@applelapis bri, this post was a callout and i want you to know that it haunts me at night as i lie awake staring at the ceiling :((((( i hope you are happy

@gigiesarocha cata, i love it when you show up on my dash bc you have!! such taste!! also, every time you gif gigie i gain five years of life <3 pls continue doing the Good Work

@pvrrish​ eleni, i remeber legit thinking that this was an official poster when i first saw it, it’s so beautiful

@ahysopae​ juliette your khaithird fic is so good and it literally changed the way i think about khai (not an easy feat)

@kurosawadachi angel, whenever i think about grace’s speech i remember your gifset and get literal chills

@doctorbahnjit alexa, you have no right to be as funny as you are. your friend zone edits give me life

@khaotungthanawat sam, you’re probably sick of getting tagged in these lists by random strangers, but i just had to bc your gifsets are Pure Art

@tanwirapong roa, all your gifsets are so ✨iconic✨

faiza @asianmelodrama and rahul @petekaos! yours were the first two thai drama blogs i followed and for ages i lowkey thought of you as my fandom parents.

and some more blogs that make me happy: @curlykytta / @lee-thanat  / @fck-inspector-m / @pangwave / @tichawongtipkanon / @tawanv @kimmonv (violet istg i have spent more time this year trying to figure out how many blogs you have than i have spent admiring your gifsets. & i spend a lot of time admiring your gifsets) / @taytawan / @1akorn and @yihwas (and your radiant lovechild @lakornladies ofc) / @teh-ohaew / @vihokratanas (mel your gifsets are just so gorgeous) / @tootiredtoosadtooangry / @headcompletelyempty / @demiromanticmickey​ / and there are definitely more but my brain is a sieve so apologies if i’ve forgotten anyone!! i love you all!! 

2020 HIGHLIGHTS ✨

rules: list your top 10 shows (bl or not) you watched in 2020 (doesn’t necessarily have to be shows that came out in 2020 though!)

1. 2GETHER & STILL2GETHER

my first thai drama, and even after all the amazing shows i’ve watched this year, it still has a special place in my heart. watching 2gether was the first time i’d ever seen a queer romcom that just... was. for me, by the simple fact of its being, 2gether was revolutionary. and then still2gether came along and took all the best things about the first season and gave us something beautiful and quiet and lovely and just proved to me, once and for all, that queer happiness doesn’t need to justify its own existence. there can be gay cuddles on the beach for no other reason than that we want them. 

2. UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN

i don’t really have the words for this one but. it makes my heart so very soft.

3. FRIEND ZONE 2: DANGEROUS AREA

season one was mindless fun because everyone was an absolute trashfire and it was hella cathartic to watch, but season 2... wow. i love it for so many reasons: it has messy and authentic queer rep; the characterisation is excellent and i somehow care about all of the characters; amazing women taking centre stage(!); a wlw relationship with lesbian, ace and bipolar rep; multiple interesting plotlines; actual character development; arm weerayut as a chaos gremlin... absolutely one of my favourites of 2020.

4. CHERRY MAGIC

i don’t think i need to explain this one, which is fortunate, because i have no idea how exactly i’d describe the happy-warm-fuzzy-queer-seen-loving-affirmed-profound feeling that rises in my chest whenever i think about it. 

5. THE GIFTED: GRADUATION

confession: i liked season 2 more than season 1 (with the exception of the ending, which we don’t talk about). season 1 was enjoyable and interesting, but for me it was season 2 which made me love this series. it did some incredibly interesting and complicated things (even if it didn’t quite nail the landing): it pushed characters to the breaking point and wove so many layers into the story and questioned its own underlying themes. plus, watching it alongside everyone in the fandom made it 200% better. i love all of you and i love this show. egg girl 5eva.

6. THE SHIPPER

i 100% understand why so many people didn’t like this show, or found it problematic, but through some fluke it absolutely worked for me (even the ending). one day i will write an essay explaining my rationale, but for now i’ll just say that it’s one of my favourite shows about adolescence and queerness and identity and compassion and friendship and love that i’ve ever watched. 

7. YYY

this series is absolutely off its rocker, and it somehow managed to be one of the most affirming shows i’ve watched. it shouldn’t have worked by it did, and i love it so much.

8. 3 WILL BE FREE

absolutely iconic. amazing plot, stunning visuals, great characters, canon polyamory, jennie being incredible... what a series.

9. MANNER OF DEATH

i love the fact that this show exists; i love the mix of crime and romance; i love maxtul’s acting; i love the central relationship; i love bun. i know we’re not even halfway through yet, but this show is doing something special and i’m so grateful that i get to watch it unfold in real time. 

10. CHIHAYAFURU (SEASON 3)

odd one out on my list, but I had to include it. chihayafuru is my all-time favourite anime and it finally got a third season, which is somehow even better than the first two. mashima taichi is one of my favourite characters of all time and his storyline hits me on such a profound level. plus, in the years since i first say this show i’ve fallen in love with classical japanese literature (particularly heian poetry) so i had newfound appreciation for the karuta matches (aka i cried every time someone recited one of my favourite poems)

other favourites: together with me, he’s coming to me, sotus and sotus s, my dear loser: edge of 17, why r u, theory of love, wake up chanee!, gameboys, pearl next door, uta koi (anime), three kingdoms (2010), blood and water (netflix). (itsay would almost certainly be on my list if i’d had time to watch it. same with dark blue kiss, which i had to pause so i could do my assignments)

Final Thoughts

well, it’s been... a year (i don’t think anyone needs a reminder of the details) but writing this post has reminded me of all the amazing shows and people I discovered over the course of it.

thank you to everyone for being so lovely and creative and funny and quirky and kind and passionate. you’re all incredibly awesome people and i wish all of you the very best xx

#tag game #I think I was first tagged in one of these like three weeks ago? but I’ve been super busy #happy new year everyone #ellis talks #also I tried to keep this as short as possible bc otherwise I could have gushed for hours about you all #and this post is long enough already #but if any of you are in a low mood or want the unabridged version of my praise then message me & I’ll compliment you profusely to your face #:)

[dreamsafterhours]

college boyfriend!markhyuk au series: III (donghyuk's pathway)

a universe in which roommates!markhyuk meet each other's s/o in class

markhyuk are roommates, my/n and dy/n are roommates, mark and dy/n take classes together and so do donghyuk and my/n — how will their fates intertwine?

genre: fluff pairings: mark+my/n (fem), donghyuk+dy/n (fem), platonic!mark+dy/n, platonic!donghyuk+my/n format: dotpoint AU universe: non idol, college bf warning: some swearing

masterlist

or click here to meet your soulmate, eng lit!mark!

II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV

III: 별빛이 내린다 샤라랄라랄라라 (2+2=4)

the meeting of two souls: donghyuk & dy/n

welcome! back and to the next part

in which things actually happen! yay

so. up until this point

it’s been quite obvious i hope

that this is the one where The Soulmates Meet™

and this one right here is the one where donghyuk meets his future wifenew best (not) friend

dammit this is a set plot with SET relationships

yeah

major spoilers for future parts but hey :) y’all know it i know it let’s just.

let’s get to it!!

that day you accidentally sleep in after a late night and walk into your lecture looking pretty trashier than you would normally a few weeks into the first sem and you’re already tired it’s okay bby aww

and mark suggests skipping the next lecture and going for coffee instead

you’re like ok lmfao free coffee for me yay thanks marcus i owe you one

and to make up for the lecture he suggests he join you and your roommate with his own roommate in the library later that day to study the material you’d missed out on

so you’re like sweet study group hell yeah and apparently his roommate is also in biomed like your roommate? hey they might get along pretty well it’d be nice to have roommates in the same faculty hey

little do you know you little cutie you uwu

mark takes you to a cafe to buy you your favourite drink and a croissant bc you skipped breakfast again and he cares about his friends ok plus he was eyeing that donut next to the savoury menu in the glass cabinet and he would have felt bad if he got something to eat and you didn’t

you sit down, sipping your drink at the window seats and wishing your fatigue away

laughing with mark about what you slept so late for

my/n had been ranting about her love life again or perhaps lack thereof,,

don’t worry tho

after you’d gotten her to sleep, you’d gotten major feels for an essay question that you’d been tasked with due in a week but you hadn’t touched it until last night

staring at the prompt for at least half an hour trying to get your head around it and wondering what the hell you’d write about

but like they say

starting is half of it

so when you start spinning your words and getting into the writing mood

you accidentally wrote an entire draft without realising

albeit being full of loose ends and points you need to refine, etc., it was a decent body of work that you’d tackle for a few more nights before turning in

a skeleton, you’d called it

“a skeleton?”

“yeah. next thing i need to do is.. flesh it out”

“.. literally”

cue mark’s small pause

/inhale/

/MANIACAL LAUGHTER/

you know how mark’s laugh is very how do i put this into words hm dictated

you can HEAR each HA and they’re separate syllables yet sometimes they can vary in tone and length right it’s usually the more consistent HAs before he kinda loses it and starts throwing himself around

it was that laugh

honestly man finds everything funny his laughing threshold seems so low

and no matter how unfunny you are he WILL laugh at anything you say

and you’ve been doing it a lot lately

you could say literally any random thing and he’d already be ready to laugh (see Figure 1.1)

Figure 1.1

you: /snort/

mark, already giggling: “what”

you, still sniggering: /touches his elbow/ “arm knee”

mark: /inhale/ gotta live and breathe that oxygen

mark: HAHAHAHAhahAhaHAHAhahAhHa (decrescendo.. cRESCENDO)

^ that but looped, with intermittent slaps to your arm

anyways you never fail to make him fall out of his chair in laughter

but enough of that. dy/n is donghyuk’s y/n for a REASON ahEM

so after you finish up your breakfast at the cafe you go back to your dorm to take a power nap and recharge before your library session you were going to stay awake but mark forces you to take a nap and you’re like bro you just fed me caffeine now you want me to sleep??

then he tells you he ordered your drink decaf

you turn to him real slow

“.. you sick traitor. how dare you besmirch my name so. you scorn my forefathers and our dependence on the holy bean’s juices. betrayal runs rampant in your soul and mine stands at the mercy of your choices, them informed by the devil himself”

mark: /shrug/ “placebo effect yeet. hey, it worked for a bit. now you should really go home and get your sleep”

and he drags you back to your dorm and waves you off before going to his next class

you’re lowkey grateful for it tho when you take a shower and collapse onto your bed, falling asleep in what you think could be half the time you usually take

dreaming about losing your airpods and mark yelling at you to be more careful and then you two fighting bc you’d just lost your $300 bean sprouts but you could have sworn he took them

then police sirens went off out of nowhere and both of you were being arrested for assault and thievery

why you were the one being arrested, you had no idea but it’s a dream nothing follows the guidelines of hard reality anyway

just as you’re about to be handcuffed, you think to yourself, nope. i have a library session to attend. ain’t nobody got time for this shit

and you just

wake up

but the sirens are still continuing?? so you’re like ? is my building surrounded

they’ve come for me

even though you haven’t exactly broken any laws or have you

and you realise it was the alarm you’d set in time to get ready for your library session

so you grab your stuff and leave for the library, double checking with your roommate over text to make sure she was on her way

her lab class was taking longer than usual so she tells you she’ll be 10 or so minutes late

so you tell her you’ll be saving a seat for her and call mark to let him know you’re on your way to the library

“oh i’m already here lol. alright, i’m waiting for you outside”

and sure enough, you see him leaning on the wall of the entrance, eyes on his phone

you consider calling out to him but before you actually do, he glances up and spots you walking over tf do you have psychic spatial awareness mark

smiles and takes his corded earphones out

“you seriously need to upgrade those”

“they work fine”

“nop i’m getting you airpods for your birthday”

“dUdE thEy’RE tOo ExPEnSiVe. nO dUDE NoO”

“nOP. i’m GOING to buy you EXPENSIVE BEAN SPROUTS for your LIFE DEBUT ANNIVERSARY and you CAN’T STOP ME”

at this point i should just put /MANIACAL LAUGHTER/ and you should know what laugh i’m referring to

/MARK LEE’S MANIACAL LAUGHTER/

/MLML/ for short

nvm it’s fine it’s kinda fun to type /MANIACAL LAUGHTER/

literally mark laughs in bolded italics i’m just sad i can’t underline it on tumblr unless it’s a link lmfao

n e ways

i digress

you shush him because you’re about to walk into the library

“qUIET DOWN marcus” turn that sh down for quiet new dawn

the library is almost full for the day but after a minute or two scouring the building you find an empty four seater in the middle of nowhere it’s CRAZY you can NEVER find a MIRACLE like this life couldn’t get better

i’m sorry

you speed walk to claim it even though there was no one else in your vicinity to threaten your territory

mark laughs at you trying to get to the table as fast as you could without all out running

getting out your things, you send a photo of your seat to your roommate and tell mark to send it to his roommate as well so they know where to find you

you start watching the lecture online while taking notes and since you’re not in the lecture theatre you can talk more audibly with mark not that you don’t talk in the actual lecture too,,

maybe you do text a lot,,, during class

mark usually says things like “.. implications of what now?? interpretation of huh?” to which you reply “i want cheese when i get home”

and he has to stifle his laughter while you keep your straight face and continue writing your notes he admires this ability ngl

and so while you’re watching it on your computer

you can say things like “fuck. i want pickles”

and mark will /throw himself back/ and cackle and probably say some shit like “DIDN’T YOU HATE PICKLES??” between his giggles

and you’re like “yeah. fuck pickles but like. fuck. pickles”

he almost falls off his chair at this point

but when he balances himself again he spots someone down the corridor and wave them over

“oii! over here dude”

you turn to glance at them to expect his roommate, but you see your own roommate talking to someone and wave her over as well

“heYY my/n”

you see the other person turn to your roommate and tell her something, , then she says something back

which is apparently shocking to them, because he glances over at mark and then at you

and then he looks again when your roommate points straight at you

to which you’re like ?? hi? y u look me

and then they both start laughing

you wonder if they were laughing at you or smth until mark’s like “tf is that idiot doing”

and u look at him like ? what idiot

“that idiot. the idiot roommate i told u about. the one who called u a homewrecker”

and you’re like

wait

[info clog]

wait

[error]

“wait”

“what”

“that’s your roommate?” u point at the boy next to my/n, who r both still laughing at something going all “wOW r u KIDDING” he has a loud voice

and mark’s like “? yeah”

and you go

“.. the girl next to him is my roommate”

mark: “wait what”

that’s what she said

at that point they’ve made their way over to the table, still trying to hold in their laughter

you start to introduce your roommate to mark, who’s still confused by the situation

you: “mark, this is my/n, my/n this is mark”

my/n: “nice to see you again mark”

you: “wait. again?”

mark: “yeah we’ve met. hi my/n”

you: “what”

mark: “yeah”

my/n: “yeah”

his roommate: “yeah”

you:

you: “i feeling like i’m missing something here”

turns out

surprise surprise

that one friend that my/n had made in her biology class was mark’s roommate oh my god they were roommates

whose name, you are told, is lee donghyuk

magical moment

us watching: heh 🤤

u can’t help but do a lil body scan from head to toe bc he a fine piece of cake we all know that

honey skin, oversized white t shirt, black pants, sneakers and lighter brown hair that looks fluffy the type of fluffy that makes u wanna touch it

yes he’s good looking. yes

yaaaaas

then mark tells him your name

“she’s the one i said reminded me of you”

“r u talking abt me behind my back marcus??”

donghyuk laughs and holds out a hand for you to shake

“what kinda coincidence is this?? i adopt your roommate, you’re dealing with mine”

“oh you’re gonna have to get in line to adopt her, i’m her legal guardian, sorry donghyuk”

to which he goes

“lmfao then we’ll both be her parents”

“k but i’ll keep her on the weekends. you see her on the weekdays”

then he wipes his smile off his face and he’s like “who said we’re split”

mark and my/n are doing the /MANIACAL LAUGHTER/ at this point

mark: “so ,, seriously what are the chances”

you: “this quartet,, it’s fate guys it’s fate there’s no way about it”

yes it is. yes. it is

even that four seater table was free because of fate

donghyuk: “this calls for drinks later. we all free? no 9am classes tmr?”

my/n: “we have a physics prac at 8:30 dingus”

donghyuk: “ah shit”

you barely got any notes for that lecture for at least an hour because you end up talking altogether throughout the session but once you remember you’re in a library to study you request a ceasefire and agree to study for a bit which,, you gotta admit ,, isn’t really productive because you’re so excited to meet someone new

but the best part about the day was when you notice how many times mark is glancing at your roommate while she’s reviewing her notes, completely oblivious

donghyuk complains that he’s hungry after another hour or two and you suggest you all have dinner together

donghyuk leans back in his chair in a stretch, his jumper lifting up a little over his jeans and showing a bit of his belly “ah i’m craving chinese”

you perk up, “mE TOO”

so you all go to your favourite chinese place just outside campus where you find out that mark and my/n have the same taste and so do you and donghyuk

he points and u and goes “oH?”

“jjAMPPONG? U TOO?”

“the ONLY DISH EVER”

mark and my/n: jjajang is fine : )

you and donghyuk: “JJAMPPONG IS SUPERIOR”

give him a bro five with the shoulder bump and everything

the boys walk you and my/n back to your dorm afterwards

donghyuk and my/n end up walking in a pair and mark walks alongside you

mark mentions how it’d be fun if you made a group chat together

you: “do it”

“i don’t have your roommate’s number tho”

you’re smiling wickedly at his reaction “?? ASK HER FOR IT”

“dude what?? no u make one and i’ll add donghyuk to it”

“bRO JUST ASK”

“wHAT NO U DO IT THEN”

so u go

bet

and you call out the two biomed kids walking in front of you

“hey donghyuk! give me your number i’ll make a group chat”

“sure lol” and you open up a new contact to let him type his number into your phone

he saves his name as hot boi hyuk ✌🏻

which you just leave bc you’re busy making the group chat

mark is still astounded that you asked donghyuk for his number so easily

you: hi hello good day

my/n 🌸: yeetus meetus

hot boi hyuk ✌🏻: bow before me

you: here before me lie the beginnings of a new era

you: one born from blood and stone

my/n 🌸: tf is she saying

hot boi hyuk ✌🏻: idk but lets go with it

you: together we rise from the rubble and sort through the debris

hot boi hyuk ✌🏻: yas queen

my/n 🌸: i hate this gc already

you: and we WILL REBUILD THIS EMPIRE

read by marcus the fool 🤡 at 8:21 pm

safe to say you stay up for a good while talking on that group chat while mark just sits idle,,

you honestly don’t know if he’s consciously reading or not maybe he just left his phone on the chat

and thus our quartet is complete,,

and they all lived

happily ever after

but this isn’t the ending tho is it

wink wonk /waggles eyebrows/

this is but the epilogue to the prologue

that doesn’t make sense but n e ways

our quartet has not yet become two pairings

y’all just don’t know what the future has in store for you :)

click here to meet your soulmate, eng lit!mark!

II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV

taglist: @lavellanfriendliness​ 

shoot me an ask if you’d like to be tagged in future parts!

#dreamwritersnet #kwritersworldnet #neowriters #nct au #nct 127 au #nct dream au #markhyuck #markhyuck au #markhyuck x reader #mark x reader #haechan x reader #donghyuck x reader #mark au #haechan au #donghyuck au #nct college #nct college au #eng lit mark #paediatrics haechan

[tommyparkerr]

Promises BONUS I | Peter Parker x Reader

So, it’s not absolutely necessary for you to have read my series Promises before reading this, but I would highly suggest it! (You can find all the links in my masterlist located in my bio!) Plus, I’d be the happiest girl in the world if you did. :) For everyone who HAS read it, I hope you enjoy the first of the many bonuses I have planned. Ask and you shall receive!

Also, I kinda sorta am entering this as an entry to my own writing challenge? I took a prompt from it because I realized this fic had the exact same line, so...yeah. Join my Fix The Endgame Irondad Writing Challenge! I’m in desperate need of Irondad as of late for...*clears throat* obvious reasons. It’ll be fun, plus you get to add to a healthy dose of Irondad if you do! Check out my post for details :)

Prompt: “Take it back.”

Words: 3.2k

Warnings: No more angst, just fluff (hence why I’m writing the bonuses)

-Masterlist-

P R O M I S E S  -  B O N U S  O N E :

Three months later...

“Are you sure you’re ready?” Peter asked you for the tenth time today as he loaded up your things into the car. 

“Peter, we’ve been over this,” you said with a smile and roll of your eyes. 

He pursed his lips. “I know, but...I just wanna make sure, ya know?”

You took a step closer and cupped his face, bringing it down to plant a small kiss on his lips. “Peter,” you said quietly, your thumb stroking his cheek, “I’m ready.”

He nodded with a sigh. “Okay, I get it. I’ll stop asking.”

You giggled and pecked his nose before lowering back down to the ground. “We already told May, hun. We’ve got to tell them before she does or we’ll both be dead.”

“She said she’d keep it a secret!” Peter argued. “Is that the only reason you’re doing this?”

“Peter, honey,” you laughed, “you know your aunt is actually a terrible secret keeper, right?” Peter grumbled in acknowledgment but didn’t reply, leading you to go on. “And no, that’s not the only reason I’m doing this. I want to do this, Peter. It’s been four months now. Besides,” you said with a shrug, “I won’t be able to keep hiding my bump for much longer. I’m actually surprised no one has figured it out already.”

At that, your husband’s face lit up and he moved to kneel in front of you. His hand lifted your shirt just enough to lay a hand on the bare skin of your small-but-there baby bump.

“Hey, baby,” Peter said, his lips parted into a smile. “We’re going to Grandma and Grandpa’s house soon and we’re going to tell them all about you. So please don’t get too scared if you hear yelling or someone you don’t know yet touches you, like Grandma May did yesterday when we told her. They’re just excited, bug.”

As he continued to speak to your baby, your heart seemed to grow and your entire body seemed to warm. You couldn’t help but lay a hand over Peter’s as a smile broke out on your face, too.

“Hey, Peter?”

He looked up finally, his eyes twinkling in pure joy. “Yeah?”

“I love you.”

Peter’s grin grew larger, and he let your shirt drop back down as he stood to kiss you. “I love you, too,” he said just before his mouth met yours. 

After a few minutes of soft kisses, you gently pulled away and leaned your head against his chest. “We’re going to be late.”

“As if Tony’s ever been on time.”

“We are going to his home, Peter,” you giggled. “He doesn’t need to be on time.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Peter sighed, stepping back and moving toward the front door. “Why do you have to be so smart all of a sudden?”

You watched as Peter’s face fell after processing what he’d just said. A sick sort of smugness rose up in you (because years ago he wouldn’t have even realized the weight of his words and now, after spending a prolonged amount of time with you, he so clearly does), and when Peter turned to face you he was met with raised eyebrows and pursed lips. 

“Would you like to rephrase that, honey?” you asked with a small smirk, crossing your arms and tapping your foot for dramatization. 

Your husband swallowed. “You’re the most intelligent, most kind, and most beautiful woman I ever could’ve dreamed of, you always have been, and I’m an idiot?”

At hearing his response, you couldn’t help but let out a small giggle. You attempted to hide it, but maybe it was better you failed; otherwise, Peter may have gone into a stress-induced seizure. 

“Wait—you’re not mad?” the brown-eyed boy asked, blinking in surprise. You just giggled again, going up to him and reaching under his arm to open the door. Peter stumbled after you, locking the door to your apartment and fumbling for the other set of keys stuffed inside his coat pocket so he could unlock the car before you reached the doors. “Were you just messing with me? Y/N? Y/N!”

Your only answer was laughter.

---

“That wasn’t very nice, you know,” Peter grumbled as he parked. “Giving a man a heart attack at the ripe age of twenty-four is neither helpful nor desirable.”

“You’re still on that?” you laughed. “Peter, that was like”—you checked your watch—“an hour and a half ago!”

“What? I’m supposed to recover from a near-heart failure in an hour and a half?!”

You laid a hand on his, shaking your head and chuckling to yourself. Going along with the joke, you said, “Your healing factor will kick in soon enough. Spider-Man, remember?”

Peter grumbled something to himself and got out of the car, coming around to your side to open your door and help you out; your belly may not have been big yet, but it was growing and it was different and it was just enough to sometimes throw your already terrible balance off-kilter.

“I love you, Spider-Man,” you said softly, standing on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek. 

Peter hummed, annoyance apparently forgotten, and pulled you into his side, kissing the top of your head. “Spider-Man loves you, too.” 

You smiled and settled into a comfortable silence as you walked toward the compound. It didn’t last long, however. 

“Well...most of the time.”

He’d said this jokingly, but after being shoved into a nearby wall Peter chose to point out much more seriously how ‘surprisingly’ strong you were for a girl. 

You raised your brows. Peter gulped. 

And thus began heart attack number two for the day. 

---

“How’s work, Y/N?” Pepper asked as she continued working on whatever dish she was making tonight.

Before you could answer, Peter grinned and said, “She got the promotion.”

Pepper dropped the wooden spoon she was using out of surprise. Luckily, Tony had anticipated it and snatched it up before it hit the ground. 

“You what?” 

You bit your lip to hide a large grin. “Yeah. Yeah, I got it.”

Pepper blinked a few times. “But you didn’t even tell us you were applying for it! I mean, you told us about it and you told us that it had a lot of good benefits and you told us you’d be interested in it, but you also told us the position wouldn’t even open up until whoever held the position retired in a few years!” You opened your mouth to try and explain that that particular person had retired early and referred you to take their place, but before you could Pepper shook her head and swept you into a hug. “Nevermind all that—I’m so happy for you!”

You smiled and returned her hug, knowing it wouldn’t be the last emotional one tonight but not revealing anything that would let Pepper know that. Peter grinned from behind you, eyeing Tony and sharing a contented look with him. 

“She said it, kiddo,” Tony said with a surprisingly genuine smile when Pepper stepped away. “We’re happy for you.” You accepted his hug and hair ruffle as if you were his own kid; and, you guessed in the same sort of way that Peter was his son, you were his daughter. 

“Thanks, old man,” you grinned, ignoring the scoff he gave you in return. 

“Well, I just have to let this simmer for a bit, so if you’d like we can move to another room while we wait,” Pepper said cheerily. 

“That’d be great,” Peter quickly accepted, knowing your back was probably starting to ache and comfortingly but inconspicuously rubbing it as he led you to your favorite couch in the sitting room. You held back a sigh of relief as you sat down; you had expected to experience some back pain, as it was one of the most common symptoms during pregnancy, but you hadn’t been expecting to experience it this early. 

“What about you two?” you asked. “Is there anything new with you?”

Tony waved a hand as if to dismiss the topic at hand. “You know, even with one of us being an Avenger slash one of the universe’s mightiest heroes and the other being CEO of the world’s most successful enterprise, we haven’t seen much excitement lately.”

Pepper rolled her eyes. “I think what my husband means to say is we’d love to hear more about this promotion you’ve worked so hard for.”

Peter managed to cover his laugh with a cough, but you couldn’t hide your small smile in time. Tony grinned at your reactions and leaned back into the couch, crossing his arms behind his head. 

“Well,” you started when you were sure you weren’t going to laugh as soon as you opened your mouth, “I do get a lot more vacation time with the promotion, along with the option to work from home on days I’m not really needed in the office which is something I’m really looking forward to. It seems unreal, but I guess with great responsibility comes great power...or something.”

“Yeah,” Peter said, catching on with an eye roll and an amused shake of his head. “Or something.”

You grinned.

“How many days of paid vacation do you get, then?” Pepper asked next, eyebrows furrowed in concern. 

“Fifteen,” you answered. “But I’ve only been working there five years, so when I make it to ten years it then goes up to seventeen, and when I make it to twenty years I get twenty days. But that’s not including the sick or extended maternity leave.”

“Extended maternity leave, eh?” Tony spoke up with a twinkle in his eye. “You’re already figuring out how to cheat the system—I like it.”

This time Pepper pushed Tony aside until he was forced to fall sideways into the cushions, and it’s a good thing she gave that so much attention because if she hadn’t, she and Tony would’ve seen the look you and Peter had shared with each other and put the pieces together before you could reveal it yourselves. 

“We’re, uh, thinking of taking advantage of some of that vacation time here in about six months or so,” Peter started. “I get eleven days a year, so I’d still have some leftover by the time I went back to work.”

“Oh, good!” Pepper exclaimed. “You two deserve a break! Where are you going? New Zealand? I know you’ve always wanted to visit New Zealand!”

“Pep, you obviously haven’t heard the way this kid talks about England—they’re definitely going there,” Tony said, sitting back up.

Ignoring him, Pepper went on. “Or Thailand! I’ve heard you talk about Thailand a lot! And you eat Thai all the time—not that I blame you.”

Tony was about to open his mouth again to probably throw another guess into the conversation, but Peter interrupted before he could. “Actually...we were thinking something a little closer to home.”

“Okay, so Pepper was wrong,” Tony said, acting as if he hadn’t proposed an overseas country as well. “So...what? The Bahamas? Hawaii? Hell, Alaska?”

“No,” you said, taking the lead with a smile. “Home. We’re going to take a vacation at home.”

It was almost comical, the looks of confusion that appeared on their faces. It was something you rarely saw, and rarer more when it came from both of them. 

“Home,” Pepper repeated slowly, testing the word out on her tongue. “Okay, and what exactly does that mean?”

“It means,” Peter said, interlacing your fingers, “that while we appreciate the joke about cheating the system, Y/N didn’t get the promotion with extended maternity leave until after we found out.”

Silence. You gently laid a hand on your lower abdomen where your bump was slowly starting to show for emphasis, in case they hadn’t caught on. 

More silence, and then-

“Take it back.”

“Tony!” Pepper exclaimed, her eyes wide and blown up with mortification as she smacked him on the chest. 

“What? Being a dad makes me old enough, but a grandpa?”

You hid the smile on your face at Peter’s troubled expression. You knew Tony was joking, but Peter was a sensitive person who often took things too literal and everyone in the room (but Peter) knew it. 

“Seriously, Pep! I’m too young for this!” Tony was smiling, laughing at his own humor, but Peter didn’t see. He was too busy looking down at his lap. After that, one look from Pepper got him shutting up pretty quickly. “Kid,” Tony said more seriously now at seeing the look on his son’s face, standing up and taking a few steps forward to clap his hands on Peter’s shoulders, “I’ve never been prouder.”

Peter sagged in relief and threw his arms around his mentor-turned-father-figure. You didn’t even try to fight the hormone induced tears that came with the scene. Pepper smiled at you understandingly and made her way over, wrapping you in a gentle hug and whispering a small but heartfelt congratulations in your ear. 

By the time you broke apart you realized Tony was rambling in the kitchen while ‘cooking’ dinner, Peter obviously not listening to a single word. He was rather watching you with a loving smile and his own set of tears in his eyes, accepting Pepper’s hug and kiss on the cheek as she repeated Tony’s words and hurried to go fix whatever dish Tony was probably on the verge of ruining. 

Peter sat you both down again and scooted close, grabbing your hands and resting your foreheads together. “This is really happening,” he whispered softly in something resembling disbelief. “We’re having a baby.”

“We’re having a baby,” you repeated, letting your eyes fall shut at the odd sense of warmth that ran through you at the words. 

“Kid, are you even listening to me? This is important stuff, I'll have you know!” Tony’s voice floated in from the kitchen, making both of your grins enlarge. 

“Yeah, yeah! I’m listening, Dad!” Peter lied with a laugh as he pulled his head away from yours, letting you rest against his shoulder. 

“That’s what I thought! Now, I better be the only grandpa on this side of the family! You better not be asking Steve to be anything but an uncle; the same goes for the rest of the team! And while we’re on the topic, I still stick with my belief that ‘grandpa’ makes me sound old and uncool. I’m thinking Pops? Is Pops good with you guys?”

You couldn’t help but laugh into Peter’s shirt at Tony’s way of showing enthusiasm.

“Grandpa Pops! Got it!” Peter replied. 

“Watch it, Parker! I will resign from my grandfatherly position, effective immediately, if your kid calls me Grandpa Pops!”

Peter had nothing to say after that, only joyful laughter escaping his lips. You lifted your head and mindlessly brushed a stray curl off of Peter’s forehead. 

“I don’t know,” you quietly said with a small shrug and mischievous grin. “I think Grandpa Pops has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

“The day our little girl calls Tony ‘Grandpa Pops’ is the day hell freezes over and he kills us both,” Peter responded with a chuckle. 

“Little girl?” you repeated quietly, your heart skipping a beat at Peter’s slip up. 

Peter blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. “I, uh...yeah.”

A soft smile tugged at your lips. “Did your spidey senses tell you that, too?”

His cheeks turned even darker, but his smile grew. “No,” he replied. “Just a feeling.”

Your heart jumped again and you pulled Peter down for a kiss, ignoring Tony’s one-sided attempt at a conversation. 

“I think it’s a girl, too,” you whispered with a smile against his lips. Peter grinned at that and pulled you in for another kiss, one hand delicately cupping your face and the other resting protectively over the small bump that would soon be your entire world. 

“Hey, as long as that baby’s around we’re keeping it PG in this household!” Tony scolded, and you giggled, pulling away from your husband’s lips. 

You expected Peter to blush and stutter like he always did when you were caught showing PDA, so you were caught by surprise when he instead rolled his eyes, said, “Oh, screw off, old man,” and kissed you again, this time lasting much longer than before. It was your turn to blush, but that soon went away along with Tony’s indignant sputtering as Pepper led him back into the kitchen. 

Now it was just you and Peter and baby—your baby—and with another skipping of your heart, you realized this was your future. Not nervously listening for knocks on the door that would no doubt tell you your husband was dead. Not failing to calm down your crying child because they just wanted their dad and didn’t understand why he hadn’t held them in so long. Not figuring out how to be both a single mother and a widow in mourning.

No—your future was filled with tender kisses and ‘I love you’s and bright smiles in the mornings, fake gags when your child saw your tender kisses, sleepy yawns as they responded with ‘I love you, too’s, and giggles as they ate the Mickey Mouse shaped pancake on their plate. 

“What are you thinking about?” Peter murmured, and it wasn’t until he said something that you noticed you’d stopped kissing him. You wondered how long he’d been watching you. 

“Our future,” you responded quietly with a small smile. 

A smile spread over his lips too as well, and he raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” you breathily laughed, looking into the brown eyes you were determined to love for the rest of your life. You raised a hand to brush over his cheek, letting yourself memorize the feel of the smooth skin. “Our future.”

Peter took your hand from his cheek and interlaced your fingers, lowering them down to his lap. He placed a small kiss on your forehead, then on the tip of your nose, then slowly connected his mouth to yours. “Our future,” he whispered against your lips. “I think I like the sound of that.”

“Yeah?” you said with a grin, your eyes fluttering shut. 

“Yeah,” he confirmed, moving your interlocked hands to rest over your stomach. “Our future: you, me, our little girl, and whatever impossible things life decides to throw at us next.”

“Like calling Tony Grandpa Pops?” you grinned

Peter chuckled and closed his eyes, brushing his nose against yours. “I love you, Y/N Parker.”

Even after two years of marriage your heart still jolted at being called the Parker name, and, quite frankly, you didn’t think your reaction would be any different sixty years from now. Because sixty years from now you would still love Peter as much as you did yesterday and still be wondering what you did to deserve such a pure, beautiful soul. Because sixty years from now your children would be all grown up and you’d be left with much, much more than what you have now, and your love for your husband would have multiplied tenfold over the years. 

Because sixty years from now you’d both be in your rocking chairs sitting the same way you are now, saying your ‘I love you’s knowing that each one could be your last but not regretting a single thing. 

“I love you, too, Peter Benjamin Parker,” you whispered, your eyes closing and your hand squeezing his. “I love you, too.”

---

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#fix the endgame challenge #promises #bonus one #peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x you #peter parker fic #peter parker fandom #peter parker au #spider man x reader #spider man x y/n #spider man x you #peter parker imagine #spider man fic #spider man imagine #spider man fandom #spider man au #series #marvel

[wannawrite]

혼자야 - forever rain 🌫

blog navigator !!

day6 masterlist~

group: day6

members: park jaehyung, kang younghyun

genre: platonic, brotherly "fluff" :">>

a/n: jaehyungparkian but written with no intention of making it gay HAHAHAHA i really love their relationship +++ I WAS IN SUCH A BIG WRITING RUT so this was birthed ¡¡¡ originally a reject of my youngk series (when you love someone) LOL

imagine that brian doesnt know jae well yet and vice versa yEA HAHAHA this takes place before congratulations era~

_________________________

Just as the clouds shrouding the city in mist had so subtly predicted, it had began to rain, and it had began to rain mercilessly.

The raindrops fell from the clouds, plummeting towards Younghyun's bangs at a lightning pace as if the seemingly harmless, rolls of white and grey had finally reached its breaking point and decided to offload their anger on the public.

Gradually, with each droplet gathering into one big puddle, and escalating into a waterfall, he could see the drops draping precariously on the rough tips of his brush shaped bangs, as if he was wearing beads on the tips of his hair.

Younghyun sighed as a song he held dearly to his heart, the song that spoke for their hustling generation, Forever Rain started to play, perfectly in sync with the now, unlike him. He had sighed a lot of times today, but that was most probably, his expression to life most of the time.

His songs, too, were sighs of his own. Younghyun's self written songs were never a voice of his own-they were simply a insignificant puff of hot steam, emanating tiredly into the air like a ball of wispy feathers only to disappear into thin air two seconds.

This song on his phone too, was a sigh.

A beautiful sigh.

Just like you

If I could

Just knock on somewhere

If I could kiss

The whole world so hard

Would someone welcome me

Maybe embrace my weary body

His pretty, gradually angled eyes looked up to the sky with the gaze of a baby lamb-innocent and demure. The world seemed to stop for him as he saw the beautiful teardrops of the sky pour down, knocking furiously onto his shoulder and asking for an invitation to come in.

The clouds were of white, grey, and dark grey hues, all layered vaguely together in a gently fierce gradient as their feelings oozed out onto the lamp posts, from the tips of Younghyun's raven locks to the edges of his tailor made black shoes, skimming to the depths of the drain.

The sky when it cried was so beautiful, and so unjudgemental to whoever it poured out its feelings to.

However, beneath the curtain of his clustered, jet black hair hid Younghyun's gentle sigh-in the knowledge that he'd never be able to do the same with his group members.

Still, for the first time since he had come to the thriving, fast paced city of Seoul, Younghyun felt raw, enveloping love drip through every vein in his blood as he stood upright amidst the care of the rain, and listened silently.

____________________________

"Younghyun! What the heck, why are you standing like that there? You're a soaking mess, get over here!"

Revelling in the quiet of the rain caressing his ears gently and quickly, Younghyun hadn't noticed anything amidst his little zone of peace until his ears opened before his eyes did. Standing across the road was a tall figure with a striking, red umbrella domed over his even more striking blonde bangs.

"Wait, I'm sorry, I just-" Younghyun struggled to gather his words, scrambled across the road like the rain puddles as he broke from his standing position, with rising fear of disappointing his friend in his chest.

"You don't have to apologise. I know you've always liked the rain, you told me that." Jae laughed in his low, boyish voice before placing a hand on Younghyun, who had finally came back to reality and started to approach his friend. Knowing very well that it wasn't the reason for him standing there, the younger boy couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt surface to his forehead as he nodded slowly.

As both of them walked to the venue with a sudden, yet somehow not so awkward silence hanging around them, Younghyun knew, with an uneasy feeling in his heart-that someone that took to socialising like a duck to water, would never understand the pleasure of having something as insignificant as the rain to accompany them.

"H-Hyung?"

"Yes?"

"Have you ever felt lonely before?"

The squeaky sound of Jae's rubber soles ceased with his question, and they stopped walking, in sync with the previous calmness that had soothed Younghyun.

Filling the awkward silence was the pattering of raindrops, crashing louder on the field of ridges in the pavement but a little softer on their umbrella.

Suddenly, the rain didn't seem so comforting after all.

"Lots of times." Jae suddenly spoke to break the silence, with an unreadable, blank expression on his face. Not being able to see a smile spread across his dashing, clear cut features felt very foreign to the younger boy, and seeing Jae feeling lonely, felt just as foreign to him.

Surprise was evident on Younghyun's face as he susceptibly raised an eyebrow.

"You're joking." he said disbelievingly.

Jae shook his head quietly. "No, I'm not."

He looked to the floor with an unusual maturity emanating from his gaze, and paused for a bit before speaking again.

"Just because I have a lot of friends doesn't mean I don't feel alone."

Instinctively and unconsciously, Younghyun's lips parted ever so slightly, gaze transfixed sharply onto the sad sliver of light skating across the curves in Jae's small, miniscule pupils.

He never really saw Jae this sad over something as small as being alone. Over being away from home, sure-over occasional fights with members, sure-but never, the hollowness of not having someone by your side.

Then, an uncheerful-maybe even condescending, maybe even bitter laugh slipped through the gaps of Jae's loosely clenched teeth.

"Ah, Younghyun, I really, really can relate to All Alone more than you think I can." he said, tone a lot more gentle than before before continuing, "It's funny, isn't it? When you have so many people surrounding you but it makes you more lonely than you were before."

Slowly recalling the sting of past incidents, Younghyun found himself nodding as he replied, "Yeah. It really just feels like...just feels like..."

"No one really cares."

The same words had come out from the mouth of two seemingly different people.

Then, with a brief exchange of glances, Younghyun started to giggle with an understanding, almost happy feeling in the crease of his eyes, and in turn, causing Jae to giggle back.

They both stood stupidly in the crowd, in the prominent presence of the storm clashing behind them-laughing, laughing and laughing, before reality hit their smiles like a brick and put a halt on their silly fit.

"H-Hey, Younghyun-or should I say, Brian-" Jae teased, with the corner of his smirk digging a small dimple at the side of his lips and earning a slap from Younghyun- "whenever you feel lonely, talk to me, yeah? We can be lonely together."

Casually, he hung a lazy arm around Younghyun's shoulder, eliciting an endearing, hearty laugh from the younger boy.

In turn, Jae's smirk softened to a smile.

"I'm totally cringing at myself for saying this, but-I'm always there for you."

Feeling the warmth amidst the cold weather beneath the laces and crosses of Jae's soft, red jumper, Younghyun's heart blossomed a small spark of warmth himself-a warmth he had never felt upon arriving in Seoul.

"I'm always there for you too, chicken-hyung." he smirked, masking his gratitude well and subsequently, arousing a strong reaction from Jae. "Hey, excuse you, since when were you-hahahahaha-allowed to-HAHAHAHAHA-tickle me?!"

In the rain, as two children played, beneath his squeals of laughter Younghyun thought inwardly-that if this was really the after effects of the rain, he wanted it to rain forever.

THE END

_____________________

forgive me for how absurdly cliché this story is, this is just a warm up LOL i was having writers block after church camp but ughhh i learnt sm and grew sm spiritually <333 my life has honestly changed forever and isjdjsjsjdjs im so SOOOOO thankful rnnn hhh

anywaY like this was originally supposed to follow up w my current youngk series but i didnt really write it w my emotions so i was largely unsatisfied ://// so it was an unfinished reject sitting in my notes for a while and i really never intended to publish it HAHAHAHA until i realised i hadnt wrote in ages and then liKe i felt so so empty nd i felt like i had forgot how to immerse myself properly whenever i tried to start a chapter so all of them came out really fake and it was like a 8 year old composition quality work LOL but anyway even tho im not that happy w this either i needed smth to write (without having to think up an opening LOL IM WORST AT STARTING A STORY) to help me grasp my emotions better again <33 so i started today at "H-Hyung" HAHAHAHHAAHA obvi it has to be about my 2 day6 biases uwuwuwuwuwu

IF YALL CLDNT TELL BTW THe sCOPE OF THIS STORY WAS LARGELY INSPIRED BY MY MANS KIM NAMJOON UWUWUWU stream mono guys he deserves it :3333 alt this mixtape has been getting a lot of hypE BUT hehehe idk ilh and forever rain especially :)

also i apologise if yall are getting sick of seeing so much day6 on this blog lol as u can see i have been SO SO hooked onto their music and knowing more about them so ;------; i will write whilst i have the most inspiration to do so !!

thanks for sticking by my shitty posting times rip :"""" this is also to revive the blog because l and i r on vacay watch it slowly die for the next few days iM SORRY :(

from your favourite chicken and briyani enthusiast ^3^

(WILL BE EDITED SOON)

#admin n #day6 #jaehyungparkian #uwu #park jaehyung #kang younghyun #responsibilities = neglected #sorry for being dead

[sicklylittlesnowflake]

Ehi!! I just read your les mis fic and it's really amazing!!!Ｏ(≧∇≦)Ｏ I was wondering if you could write one with the Sickie scenario you reblogged with A being enj, B being R and C... I don't know actually... Ferre maybe?

(Okay so here’s the thing: I don’t know what I reblogged. I have a very vague memory of it which I’m certain is right for the most part but I may have missed out some of the detail on the scenario so apologies for that! I’ve said this before but I love writing les mis!! Also sorry if my translations are off! Not native French speaker!)

TRANSLATIONS:

J'ai mal a la tête-my head hurtsJ'ai froid Grantaire- I’m cold, GrantaireJ'ai sommeil- I’m sleepyQuest ce qu'il fait faire ? -What should I do? Je suis desolee- I’m sorryA tés souhaits- Bless youJe ne me sens pas biens- I don’t feel wellPrenons ta temperature, oui? -Let me take your temperature, yes?Tu as l'aire malade, Enjolras- You look sick, EnjolrasRestez au lit, oui?- Stay in bed, yes?Ou est Grantaire? -Where is Grantaire?

Grantaire knows Enjolras well.

He’s spent a long time watching him move, analysing every little thing about him, and he’d fall in love a little more each day. And ever since Grantaire realised that his love was returned, he could only fall deeper in love.

He’d fall in love with Enjolras’s hair in the morning, how soft and perfectly messy it was. He’d fall in love with the look of his sleeping face, so calm, so beautifully natural. He’d fall in love with the way he’d constantly tap his fingers on surfaces to cope, and the little noises it would make. He’d even fall in love with the little stutter and shake to his voice, and even how clammy his hands got when he was anxious. Which was a lot of the time.

But these things no matter how imperfect made Enjolras.

And Grantaire loved Enjolras.

He loved him and all his little quirks. He’d memorised them; a little cheat sheet permanently installed into his head. Grantaire knew when Enjolras was getting sick.

He knew when he came home and his jacket pockets would be stuffed with tissues. He knew when the very tip of his nose would be slightly pink and slightly dry. He knew when Enjolras wore old  hoodies for days in a row. He knew when Enjolras sneezed slightly louder, a little more powerful.

Enjolras pitched forward with a forceful sneeze that doubled him over, but managed to catch wth his sleeve. The sound was obviously strained, but not too successfully, like he had been trying to muffle the sound but had failed to do so.

Grantaire frowned and put down his paintbrush, sighing. It had been the 6th time in the past half hour, and he needed to draw the line. He approached him quietly, gently putting his hands on Enjolras’s shoulders and softly massaging them.

“Bless you, baby,” Grantaire whispered.

Enjolras jumped slightly, face still buried in his sleeve. After he pitched forward with another sneeze he cleared his throat and smiled at him wearily.

“Thank you,” Enjolras said.

Grantaire rested his chin on Enjolras head as he lovingly embraced him, “E, baby, I think you’re coming down with something.”

Enjolras cleared his throat and shook his head weakly, “I’m fine, R, I promise. Just a little tired.”

Grantaire frowned, “I don’t like you working like this. You’re worrying me, come to bed?”

Enjolras offered him a sympathetic smile, “I love that you care for me so much, but I am honestly fine, ‘Taire.”

There was nothing he could do to convince him.

Enjolras sighed, “Here, let me just finish this point here then I’ll come to bed, okay?”

Grantaire sighed and gave him and a sad little smile, whispering a soft little goodnight as he left a little kiss against Enjolras’s nose. He left shortly after towards the bedroom, but couldn’t quite get rid of the anxiety building in his chest once he heard the harsh and chesty cough that came out of his boyfriend.

Enjolras didn’t come into bed until many hours later, and as much as that worried him all Grantaire could think about was the oh so good warmth against his body filling him with love.

They could figure this out when the morning came.

Enjolras was gone by the time Grantaire woke up.

He’d left a note like he usually did, of course, because Enjolras was a sweetheart. However what Grantaire did notice was that Enjolras appeared to be quite late, probably from exhaustion and oversleeping,  given the fact his pyjamas were on the floor rather than in the hamper, the coat rack and the shoe pile was slightly messed up, and how there was no empty bowl of cereal left at the sink.

Grantaire frowned, unhappy that Enjolras had left the house sick and without anything in him. He shot a quick text to Marius telling him that Enjolras was sick and had no food in him. Grantaire sighed, feeling a little unsettled in his stomach and feeling a little anxious for his boyfriend. But he couldn’t waste the day worrying needlessly, Enjolras was strong and capable, he wasn’t going to die.

Grantaire just sucked it up and began to work on his art project. He lost himself in his skilful pain strokes and the beautiful colours that popped and complimented each other wonderously. He lost him in his art, each stroke of his brush calculated yet loose and free.

He was so lost in his art he had lost his concept of time, and his concept of his senses because he didn’t hear his phone ring or see it light up.

Grantaire finally checked on his phone at around quarter to four, and when he saw the text on his phone his heart sank.

Marius: E really is not doing good and he’s been sneezing and coughing so much so I’m trying to force him home (1:56)

Marius: Ok so I got him to go home and I really wish I could give him a lift or come with him but I’ve got a test and I feel awful but at least he’s coming home to ur loving arms!! :-) (2:48)

Grantaire looked over at the window and his heart sank deeper as he realised how hard it was raining.

He let go of a breath he hadn’t realised he had been holding and let out a series of rapid shaky breaths out of anxiety. He felt his heart begin to speed up and his blood run cold, as he scrambled to try and unlock his phone and try to contact him.

“Dammit, dammit, dammit!” Grantaire hissed, flustered, as he kept failing to unlock his phone. To him, every second wasted was him getting closer and closer to losing Enjolras.

Until he heard the relieving sound of keys being yanked into the keyhole, twisting and the door softly being pushed open.

“Oh my god,” Grantaire said in relief, a heavy weight lifted off his shoulders.

Enjolras came shuffling in, like a ghost, completely drenched and his clothes sticking to his skin. He looked the epitome of miserable, and every inch of Grantaire wanted to leap on him and make him warm and make him better again. He couldn’t handle seeing someone who was made of sunlight and moon dust so stifled.

“Hey,” Enjolras said weakly, his voice cracking and hoarse. He managed a weary, feverish smile before he was tilting slightly, then collapsing.

Grantaire rushed to his side and caught him before he fell, “Oh my god, E!”

He put the back of his hand against his cheek, “You’re burning up! Oh fuck, I gotta get Ferre..”

“J'ai mal à la tête..” Enjolras murmured into Grantaire’s sweater.

Grantaire froze. Fear seeped into his bones, his hands beginning to shake slightly in fear of his boyfriend. He loved him too much, and he wished he could take any pain away from him. Enjolras didn’t deserve it.

“J'ai froid, Grantaire…” Enjolras whimpered.

“U-uh, q-quest c-ce qu'il fait faire?” Grantaire asked nervously, beginning to panic. He wished he knew a bit more French.

“O-okay, lets get you out of those clothes and I’ll call Ferre, okay?”

Enjolras nodded tiredly as Grantaire tried to lead him over to the en suite bathroom. Grantaire passed him a towel to dry off on, and left him briefly to carefully select an old but well loved, royal blue sweater from Enjolras’s old high school and a warm, thick pair of jogging bottoms.

“Here, ‘Jolras, sweetie, you need to get changed..”

“J'ai sommeil..” Enjolras whined weakly.

Grantaire heart was aching, desperately wanting to kiss it all better, “I know, love, I know. You can go to bed soon, I promise, but you need to get changed..”

Enjolras nodded finally, until he was taken over by an intense coughing fit that had him doubling over. His entire frame racked with the awfully chesty coughs, face scrunched in pain as he continued to cough. His muscles contracted as he did so, a wheezy breath ringing out as he inhaled and then fell back into the tortuous cycle.

Grantaire rubbed his back soothingly, frowning as he helped Enjolras to remove his wet clothing and donn the newer, soft ones. Enjolras picked up the sweater before his breath started to hitch and his red nose twitched, and he was being taken over by a monstrous sneeze sprayed all over the sweater.

Enjolras sniffled weakly, rubbing at his irritated nose, “Je suis desolée..”

Grantaire smiled warmly and leaned in to kiss Enjolras on the nose, “A tès souhaits.”

Enjolras’s breath caught again and he sneezed violently to the side, the force of the sneeze clearly taking a lot out of him. Just as his eyes began to open, his eyes began to water again and he exhaled deeply to prepare himself for his third sneeze, which was even more desperate and ticklish than the last one.

Grantaire frowned and lead Enjolras back to their bed, tucking him in. It was then when Grantaire noticed how much he was shaking.

“Je ne me sens pas bien,” Enjolras whimpered weakly. He sounded so miserable it broke Grantaire’s heart, and it pained him how horrible Enjolras was feeling.

“I know baby,” Grantaire choked out before whipping out his phone and dialling for Combeferre, watching Enjolras toss and turn in a restless, feverish sleep as he waited for Combeferre to pick up.

“'Taire?”

“Oh thank god, Ferre!” Grantaire exclaimed, but still trying to keep his volume down for his sick boyfriend’s sake.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Enjolras! He’s burning up so bad and hjs cough sounds awful and he’s sneezing and he’s speaking French for fucks sake Ferre my French isn’t the greatest and he’s so delirious and I’m so scared and I–”

“R, man, calm down. It’s okay. You’re okay. He’s okay. I promise you everything will be okay, deep breaths, alright? I’ll be there in about 15, just try and take his temperature and stay by his side, alright?” Combeferre reassured gently.

“O-okay,” Grantaire stuttered as he put down and reached for the thermometer inside one of their drawers, opting for the ear one and approaching Enjolras.

“Prenons ta temperature, oui?” Grantaire whispered shakily as he gently inserted the thermometer into Enjolras ear. He waited anxiously for the click and his heart dropped when he saw what it was. He just hoped Combeferre would be here soon.

“Oh, thank god you’re here!” Grantaire exclaimed with relief, his voice shaky from worry.

Combeferre shot him a sympathetic smile, “Awh, R..Here, give me a hug, you look worried sick..”

Grantaire nodded weakly and collapsed into the hug, letting out shaky inhales and exhales. Combeferre rubbed his back comfortingly and gave him a smile.

“Now where’s the little shit?”

“In the bedroom,” Grantaire giggled.

Combeferre shuffled over to their shared bedroom, and frowned upon the sight of his sick best friend.

“Awh, no..what’s his temp?”

“103 on the dot,” Grantaire frowned.

“Go get him a cold towel, okay?” Combeferre asked softly, to which Grantaire quickly obliged. Once he left Combeferre let out a heavy sigh and shifted to position himself closer to the sick boy. He hissed a little at the raging fever.

“Jesus, E..What have you done now?” Combeferre said exasperatedly, loosely playing with his blonde locks.

Suddenly Enjolras’s face contorted into a pre sneeze expression and he quickly turned his head to the side and released three monstrous and sickly sounding sneezes that left him breathless and chest heaving for air. He looked around blearily through watery eyes and jumped very slightly when he recognised him.

Combeferre offered him a sympathetic smile, “Tu as l'air malade, mon ami.”

Enjolras nodded weakly, pawing at his nose, “Oui, je ne me sens pas biens..”

His eyes suddenly watered with tears, highly emotional from the fever that flushed his face a deep pink colour. “Ou est Grantaire?” Enjolras whimpered.

Grantaire returned with the cold towel, eyes widening upon recognising that Enjolras was now awake. He quickly ran over to him and jumped onto the bed to cuddle Enjolras into his arms.

“Jesus, Enjolras..you scared me so much..god, I love you so so much,” Grantaire whispered lovingly, pressing soft little kisses against his smooth skin.

“Je suis desolée, je t'aime..” Enjolras said feverishly, melting into Grantaire’s embrace. He pushed away, begin to cough violently into the crook of his arm.

Combeferre gave them both a sweet smile, “Now, E, you don’t want Grantaire all sad and worried, do you? You have to get better soon for him, okay? We’ll help you. Restez au lit, hm? We love you very much.”

Enjolras nodded obediently, which was slightly worrying that he wasn’t being a stubborn prick, showing the fact he truly had a bad fever. But he would be okay. He had two loving people by his side.

He had a friend and a boyfriend who would catch his sneezes and bless him after he sneezed,  who would rub his back whenever he coughed, bring down his temperature and cuddled him until he felt a little better. They would be there.

And they were, and slowly he did get a little better.

Enjolras’s theory was proven right because Combeferre and Grantaire were there for him. The past few days they’d take of him, and it had been a past few days filled with constant back rubbing and blessings. Sometimes Courfeyrac and Marius would pop up with soup or ice cream or simply to crack a joke. He’d felt extremely miserable, but now he’d felt a little less miserable. He still felt a little sick, but well enough that he was eager to get back to work, but that was strictly prohibited.

Grantaire on the other hand had also been miserable. He could barely sleep worried out of his mind for Enjolras. It’s not like the guy hasn’t been sick before, in fact he got sick more often than the average percentage, but something about the delirious French and him completely not noticing the lashing rain had set him off. Grantaire had been beyond stressed, and the same way Enjolras got his illness to begin with, he had taken ill by his stress.

It wasn’t too bad, he’d feel a little fever coming on, and he did feel a little stuffy. And apparently Enjolras was slightly more observant than he was because it took no time for him to notice.

The exhaustion had been far too much for him. Grantaire could feel it in his bones, seeping into them and he needed to get away from everything me take a breather. He’d left a movie for Enjolras in their bedroom, leaving in the guise of doing some painting, but ended up falling asleep on the couch.

He’d woken up some time later to a hand lovingly combing through his hair, and the sound of sweet and melodic humming. Enjolras looked down and a soft smile spread across his lips, leaning down to press a kiss against his hair.

“Hey,” He whispered.

“Hi,” Grantaire whispered back fondly.

“You’ve been a little quiet today, sweets,” Enjolras said worriedly, sitting next to Grantaire on the couch.

“Wow, you’re speaking English again?” Grantaire teased playfully.

“Oh, shut up,” Enjolras giggled, “but seriously, what’s up?”

Grantaire didn’t even have time to respond before Enjolras’s eyes were widening, and hand rushing towards his forehead.

“Oh, fuck,” Enjolras sputtered nervously, his breathing picking up a little.

“Oh no, I’m so sorry,” Enjolras whimpered, a little teary, “How long? I didn’t even fucking notice you were so caught up trying to take care of me and now you’re sick and I did this to you I’m so so–”

“Enjolras!” Grantaire called out, forcing himself to sit up, cupping his lover’s trembling face in his hands.

“Stop it, it’s okay, I’m okay,” Grantaire rasped out, “There’s nothing to be worried about.”

Enjolras let out a series of shaky breaths and tried to regain his composure, nodding weakly, “P-please, a-at least let me t-take care of you.”

Grantaire offered him a loving smile, “Okay, you can start by handing me those tissues.”

Enjolras managed a little giggle and reached for the tissues situated on their coffee table, handing them over to his boyfriend, allowing him to pluck one out. Grantaire steepled the tissue over his face and blew his nose, the loud noise making the most unattractive sound he had ever heard.

Grantaire cringed at the wet, soggy sounding sound that sounded a mix of a trumpet horn and a deflating balloon and went slightly red at that. He drew away the tissue and caught sight of Enjolras’s face, who’s face was a deep pink, lips pressed together tightly. His shoulders started to shake slightly.

“What?” Grantaire asked, a little bit of a giggle punctuating his sentence.

Enjolras burst into laughter, a kind of harmonious and laughter that was so bright and crisp it sent a little shiver down Grantaire’s spine. He couldn’t help the wife smile that brushed over his face.

“Sorry! I don’t mean to laugh, it’s just–” Enjolras couldn’t help but fall back into his little laughing fit, his entire frame shaking as he continued to laugh. Grantaire thought it was a good look on him.

“What? This?” Grantaire chuckled, blowing his nose again which sent Enjolras into hysterics again. He spent a good minute in his hiccupy giggles, he looked so cute that Grantaire just wanted to devour him.

Enjolras could barely breathe, “Fuck! I can’t–hahaha-breathe!”

Enjolras started to laugh at this ridiculous situation, until his laughs began to become punctuated with little coughs.

“Okay now, lets calm down,” Grantaire giggled, cupping Enjolras’s face and nuzzling his nose with his boyfriends fondly. They sat there like that, gazing.

“God, you’re adorable,” Grantaire whispered in a husky whisper.

“You’re funny,” Enjolras giggled as he ran his hands through Grantaire’s dark curls lovingly.

Grantaire pushed Enjolras away to cough a few dry coughs into his sleeve, causing Enjolras to frown.

“Here, let me get you some medicine..” Enjolras started, pushing himself off of the couch and retreating into the kitchen.

Grantaire let out a fond chuckle, stretching out against the couch and letting out a quick sneeze. He yawned, feeling sick but content. He had a boyfriend who was adorable and loved him so much, and seeing Enjolras laugh was so revitalising and so fresh. It was a good day.

Enjolras came hopping back with a packet of pills and a glass of water, a bright and wide smile on his face.

“I’ve got you some medicine!” Enjolras grinned, before his face scrunched up and he burst into a harsh sneeze that toppled him over a little so some water splashed over the edge and spilled onto the ground.

“Oops,” Enjolras said.

Grantaire burst into laughter and opened up his arms, “For fuck’s sake, come over here and give me a hug you piece of shit!”

Enjolras couldn’t help the fond smile as he rushed over and settled the items onto the coffee table, then proceeded to jump into Grantaire’s arms and cuddled him. He pressed soft little kisses all over him, each filled with love.

“I love you,” Enjolras whispered lovingly.

“I love you,” Grantaire rasped out before snuggling against Enjolras’s side, as tiredness suddenly began to sink into his body. His warmth was so pleasant and sleep seemed to be calling for him.

“You’re going to be okay, 'Taire. I’ll take care of you. Get some rest, I’ll be right by your side,” Enjolras whispered fondly. Grantaire could only nod in response weakly, basking in his warmth.

Grantaire knew Enjolras pretty well.

He knew that sparkle in his blue eyes, like light on a sunny day, whenever he looked at something he loved. That gaze would often be for him, and it never ceased to amaze him. He knew that warmth against his body whenever he was cuddled.

He knew that kindness and love in Enjolras’s heart and as long as he was here Grantaire knew he was going to be alright.

#enjolras #grantaire #enjoltaire #les mis #combeferre #exr #les miserables #sickfic #whump #les amis #sick enjolras #sick grantaire #victor hugo #les mis 2012 #tveitjolras #prompts

[tayegi]

im crying not only bc of your amazing writing, but bc i was scrolling thru my dashboard and i saw you answering all these asks about new rules and i’m so dump thinking that you set up new rules or sthg, i didn’t understand it so i read all those asks and fucking spoiled myself kmp, but on another note yOU FUCKING ROCK OMG NEW RULES IS SO AMAZING I LOVE IT 💘💘💘

Anonymous said:I'M LOVING NEW RULES SO MUCH just wanted to show my support. i love your writing in general don't get me wrong but new rules is messing with my heart and it's amazing

Anonymous said:Hi! I just read both parts for "New Rules" and I loved them! If this goes in the same direction as Dua Lipa sings (I guess it will) it sounds like it'll be very interesting. I love how everyone in the story is human, not just good or bad, you know? 90% of fics would've made Mijoo the stereotypical barbie bitch, but you didn't and I was pleasantly surprised! I also feel very identified with the OC. I really want her to open up and discover who JK really is, whoever that is. Keep up the good work!

jabaelashit said:Hey! i already wrote you a message on one of your posts but i just wanted to say that i am feeling so skabakks right now, I can't stop thinking about new rules and i'm torn between crying or crying but w angsty. I hope oc learns her worth and can understand she's just as amazing as mijoo, even better if we're talking about morals but oh well people fuck up:( I'm glad she forgave her but I hope she distances from her cause that gurl ain't having the same respect for the friendship as oc/1

jabaelashit said:and i also hope she gets to tell jimin her feelings not to like make him break stuff w mijoo, but to let him know she hadnt seen the note and to release some pressure and feelings cause oc bottles up so much and i just want to go and hug her and don't leave her until she understands shes fucking badass and cool and that the way she thinks is 👏👏👏 lu you've made me feel such a diverse amount of emotions i don't know what to do w myself anymore, your writing is amazing! love love loove you❣/2

Anonymous said:Hey!!:) idk if this is the right place to send compliments cause im really new to tumblr but THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR FICS. Tbh I'd buy it if you published a physical compilation;)

Anonymous said:Wow for the longest time I was searching your old username; idek why cause I’ve known you changed your username and have been keeping up to date with you LMAO this is what being sick and delirious does to me. ANYWAYS! Hope you’re not too down with the crazy anons your story is great and I’m thankful for the dynamic characterizations you create! It makes it so much more interesting cause you create many characters with depth!!

Anonymous said:Can I please just have your writing talent? The OC is just so real, and that moment when she's deciding what to do with Mijoo, and what she actually says at the end.... I can't actually put my thoughts into words. I'm legit stunned by the sheer amount of emotions I felt reading the second chapter. I genuinely adore the banter between JK and OC, I personally prefer people to be more direct with what they want, so I already appreciate them, but also Jimin's convo with OC... (1/2)

Anonymous said:Jimin's convo with OC... Idk about these other anons going off on Mijoo, I was more thinking 'why didn't Jimin chase the note?' and then he would have had his answer then and there. But that might have just been me... And also, thinking back to it now, when JK said 'I need you' and OC repeated it back to him like super softly, like she was surprised oh god, okay, my heart is breaking even more for OC now, idk if I'm reading too much into it. I love you Lu, I hope you're well, and happy! (2/2)

Anonymous said:I love your fics so much!! The sass is real esp with jungkook 😂

Anonymous said:Anyways do ya thang hunny ✨ Keep wrecking me with your writings 💞✨💞✨💞✨💞✨💞✨😩

Anonymous said:Read part 1 of New Rules and was like yeah thisll be fun, I'll have a great time. Then I read part 2 and ended up shedding some real tears at the end?!?! LU WHAT THE...... But really though its so nice to read a fic where the OC values friendship. The idea that its always girls against girls makes me sad.. we should be sticking together!!

Anonymous said:so... surprise surprise, dis gon be about new rules 😂 but I really wanted to thank you for adding so much of the oc's inner dialogue, and making her such a character in the first place. a lot of fics do not portray ocs with more defeatist attitudes, but yours does and I was glad, because I could finally relate to a fic :) also, coming back to the inner dialogue thing, it was so in depth that i could really feel what the oc was feeling, what she was going through. it was amazing ❤️ thank you!

Anonymous said:Man this is one hell of a good fic i’m highly anticipating the next chapter!!! Even though it seems like traditional frat fuckboy x ‘i hate frat bois but ye i’d fuck u’ type of girl it still is in a way a little different i just can’t quite catch how but nonetheless it’s amazing!!! Keep up the good work babe

oceanjoon said:ok so ur newest fic new rules literally is so real n relatable !! like honestly i understand seeking physical comfort in people u dont care about wen u r feeling down/insecure to validate urself n it just rlly hit home

kyarybunny said:Lu. At this point I have so many compliments to give you I can't really form it all properly. But I really am enjoying New Rules and this plot you're breathing life into! It's a different facet of your writing and I love how you can interpret every character's actions in a few different ways. Thank you for continuing to write and I hope you enjoy writing as much as we do reading/analyzing.

Anonymous said:Istg when I read the new chapter of New Rules I clenched my fist like that Arthur meme when it came up to the part about mijoo and the note. Girl got me heated lol. As usual, your works do not disappoint! I love your wittiness and how it shines in your writing. The remarks and dialogue in all of your series really proves your talent. You’re truly a gem amongst fanfic writers 💕☺️📢

Anonymous said:i was happily reblogging a few things on my dash and ch1 of new rules just came and i started reading WHERE THE FUCK DID I GET MY ASS INTO???!!!???!?! IT'S FUCKING AMAZING i don't know why i didn't start reading before. don't you ever dare stop writting, you're such a good writter and i enjoy your works very very much

Anonymous said:OC DESERVES HAPINESS JUST AS MUCH AS MIJOO. OC SHOULDVE PUT HERSELF AND HER HAPPINESS BEFORE HER FRIEND'S BECAUSE SHE IS TOO GOOD FOR ALL OF THEM DJFJFJ i hope one day jimin finds out about her feelings :(

Anonymous said:new rules just keeps getting better and better 😻😻

Anonymous said:Wow.. Okay.. I do believe chapter 2 of New Rules has officially ruined me. My heart was actually beating so fast through out the whole chapter, and it's still racing now too. I've thought this multiple times while reading your fics, but you're writing really is incredible. Your characters and the way you describe their emotions is so unbelievably relatable that the reader can't help but be sucked in. I always find myself becoming invested in your characters! Thank you for all the adventures!

Anonymous said:I felt so bad for the OC this chapter ;.; If I were in her position, I'd probably do the same since causing a scene is yes, immature and not worth the energy. But, if i could be a character in New Rules I'd probably be the other best friend who'll be like "guurl, confront her ass it isnt an excuse just because she's your friend." All in all I see the OC as the kind of person who'll go out of their way to care for someone to the point of disregarding their own feelings, which is unhealthy :( (1)

Anonymous said:(2) but thats what makes her such a relatable character. I really, really like that in your OCs. This is probably the second OC i emotionally relate to, first is Copper Girl. But yeah I'm just distracting myself from assignments lol this series is amazing and just you are amazing Lu!!!! ily!!!!! PS. Jungkook is still agsjshskll he's cocky but with OC he's quite vulnerable. I wonder why? Is it just a front or does he have other intentions?

Anonymous said:alternative ending to new rules: mijoo and mc are over their respective boys, does not bother to get into any messy scenarios like that ever again, love each other and support each other and is forever the friendship that everyone envies anD I HATE THIS SITUATION SO MUCH GODDAMMIT LU!!! UR REALLY TRYING TO TEAR MY HEART APART!!

marchxseptember said:OH MY GOD CHAPTER TWO IS UP. I HAD A FEELING SO I HAD TO CHCK UR ACC AND I WAS RIGHT. BRB GONNA READ

marchxseptember said:AND THE PLOT THICKENS. I JIST FINISHED READING CH. 2 AND I AM FUCKED UP. I HAD A THEORY BEFORE BUT NOW I HAVE LIKE 2 MORE IM CONFUSED. I LOVED IT SOOO MUCH. AND I HATE MIJOO NOW. I CANT WAITT TO SEE WHAT WILL HAPPEN. THIS WAS SO GOOD LU.

omg the amount of response ive gotten for new rules is unbelievable. I dont think ppl were even this into equilibrium. the last time u guys acted like this was during the golden boy trilogy and it really feels so good to have this again.

thank you all for your thoughtful messages and for giving this ridiculous little fic a chance. I love you all

#new rules #keehyung #lu answers

[whyisthisfrenchguymasturbating]

treasured mutual @sun-moon-starboy tagged me in this 👉😎👉 thanks for enabling my unhealthy hobby of oversharing on the internet

a. age: 18 b. birthplace: everett, washington c. current time: 9:42 p.m. d. drink you last had: i’m currently drinking a root beer e. easiest person to talk to: @andefox3 and @seven-sneaky-foxes f. favorite song: currently, susumu hirasawa’s “parade (instrumental)” g. grossest memory: when i was like 7 i ate an entire tub of red vines by myself and got sick for the whole night so that was pretty bad i guess h. horror, yes or no?: horror is my favorite genre of anything ever. all i write is horror and porn ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i. in love?: @seven-sneaky-foxes ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) j. jealous of people?: constantly lmao k. killed someone: i mean i constantly kill off characters in writing but what the fuck kind of question is this l. love at first sight or should i walk by again?: i don’t believe in love at first sight. infatuation, sure, but not like actual love. that being said i started dating my boyfriend approximately one month after we met and we’re still going strong ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ m. middle name: remus (for the exact reason you’re thinking) n. number of siblings: 3 o. one wish: lifelong happiness with my boi p. person i called last: my grandma, i think? q. question you’re always asked: “are you a boy or a girl?” alternatively; “are you really a boy?” r. reason to smile: mcelroy content, my friends, my boyfriend, animals, game grumps, the legend of zelda series, inside jokes, skyrim, taako, les mis, book smell, moving out of here, love s. song you last sang: vivaldi’s “duetto buffo di due gatti” (aka the cat duet) t. time you woke up: 6 a.m. u. underwear: i only wear boxers v. vacation: japan or greece, maybe italy w. worst habit: cutting probably x. x-rays: i have braces bitch i get x-rays all the time. i’ve also had ones on my foot and throat y. your favorite food: banh ran, turkey sandwiches, cranberry juice, strawberry banana smoothies z. zodiac sign: filthy aquarius

i tag @andefox3 @extrasmalldaddy @nerdycantaloupe @vacuum-tube-glow @bleeding-empress @fiddlekid @seven-sneaky-foxes and whom’s’t'ever else wants to do it

[feminismforme]

johncoveredinjam:

eatyourpaisley:

queenofadodi:

Men had no problem violating women’s bodies while they had on corsets, petticoats and farthingales, so what the fuck makes you think a short skirt has anything to do with it? thank you

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“As the grandchild of Polish and Russian Jews who lost them by the Nazis, no one wants wrenching denunciations of the Holocaust produced more than I do. What Hollywood refuses to admit is that “The Pianist” should never have been made, regardless of its inherent value. Why? Because its director belonged in prison, not in Paris pursing his art. You don’t get to do creative, fulfilling work when you skip bail … you get to hide in obscurity hoping not to get caught. Or, should we start giving Get Out Of Jail Free cards to every convicted sexual offender who might potentially write the next Great American Novel, paint the next masterpiece, compose a triumphant concerto? Oh, right, this logic only extends to already-rich, currently-bankable stars. Like R. Kelly, who released album after album while paying off witnesses and settling out of court with numerous victims to avoid ever having to face rape charges. Meanwhile, girls across the country get a message: If you come forward after a powerful man sexually assaults you, it’s your rapist — not you — who will receive protection.” — Corporate media’s rape problem: Supporting the stars, ignoring the charges (via azspot)

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“Don’t be slutty, don’t have sex. But be sexy. If you’re too sexy though and you get raped, then that’s you’re own fault because you’re not actually supposed to listen to us about being sexy, even though we tell you your value is derived from how sexy you are. If you get into a position of power, we will assume that you used your sex appeal to get there and not your brains and we will mock you even though we told you the only thing that mattered was your sex appeal. Make yourself accessible to me, but holy shit stop being so desperate and needy. Don’t be a tease. If we want to have sex with you, don’t friendzone us, even though we just fucking told you not to have sex.” — patriarchy proverb (via stfueverything)

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Male as protector ataulfomangos:

iambugbrennan:

Protection then becomes a pretext to violence.

Read Kathleen Barry As always, Charlotte Perkins Gilman said it best:

One new indulgence was to go out evenings alone. This I worked out carefully in my mind, as not only a right but a duty. Why should a woman be deprived of her only free time, the time allotted to recreation? Why must she be dependent on some man, and thus forced to please him if she wished to go anywhere at night?

A stalwart man once sharply contested my claim to this freedom to go alone. “Any true man,” he said with fervor, “is always ready to go with a woman at night. He is her natural protector.” “Against what?” I inquired. As a matter of fact, the thing a woman is most afraid to meet on a dark street is her natural protector. Singular

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bye at people who see others with plastic surgery and say “those aren’t her boobs/nose/ass” etc

um bitch yes it is

if she paid for it that shit is hers

did u knit that sweater ur wearing by yourself? no? did you purchase it?

then it’s yours bitch

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Why I Fucking Love Teenage Girls (A Personal Essay from an Almost Adult) fygirlcrush:

A few months ago, I went to a big family gathering at my grandparents’s house and ran into a cousin of mine. She seemed much older than the last time I had seen her (oh, the passage of time), so I asked her what age she was. She replied, “Oh, I’m fifteen.” And my immediate reaction?

“Oh my god, I am so sorry.”

She laughed, which gives me a little bit of hope that maybe, for her, being fifteen isn’t a complete fucking nightmare. But I think she recognized what I was saying on some level. Fifteen is, without a shadow of a doubt, the worst age. Wait, maybe fourteen. Thirteen? Twelve was pretty bad, too. Fuck it, they all suck. Nothing summarizes being a young girl better than this simple quote from The Virgin Suicides: “You’re not even old enough to know how bad life gets.” “Obviously, Doctor, you’ve never been a thirteen-year-old girl.”

It’s amazing, really. I spent my entire childhood counting down the days until I could be a teenager. I planned everything out perfectly: I would go shopping with friends by myself downtown by fourteen, kissing cute boys by fifteen, losing my virginity by sixteen, driving a cute car by seventeen, and off to university to have even more amazing experiences at eighteen. My life would be a fucking commercial, starring me, my best friends, and Jordan Catalano. It was going to happen.

Until it didn’t.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I actually had a few of those things on my list. I drove a pretty bitchin’ baby blue VW Beetle and I did end up going to university. I’m luckier than most. But where were the boys? Where were the cute clothes? Who took my fantasy and dumped a steaming bag of hot garbage juice on it?

We sell this idea of what you’re life is going to be to young girls from the fucking get-go. To be fair, that’s advertising, right? Selling you the life you want, no matter the age? Well, unfortunately, little girls can’t see through the bullshit. We internalize all of it. And that’s what makes the hardships of being a teenage girl sting even more.

I was thrown into the pot of steaming dogshit pretty early. I was wearing a bra at nine, dealing with self loathing by ten, and by twelve, I was officially balls-deep in it. And it didn’t go away. Between twelve and (I’ll be generous and say) seventeen, all the garbage just kept circulating in my system. It would just evolve, or die down, only to flare up at the slightest irritation. That’s what being a teenage girl is: you’re full of poison. Mostly, you just poison yourself over and over again, but sometimes some of it leaks out of you and onto someone else.

At twelve, most girls understand real sadness. Twelve, though it seems so young to us now, felt really old at the time. By this point, you’ve already been told how to be, and realized that you’re not measuring up. By twelve, your skin is already shit, and your body is too flabby or your breasts haven’t come in yet. Worst of all, when you’re a girl, by twelve you’ve probably already been in a situation that made you feel threatened sexually. Let that sink in. From the top of my head, I can think of four moments in my life, before the age of twelve, when someone crossed a line with me. Four. This is not abnormal.

By thirteen, you’re already prepared to destroy yourself. When you’re a sad teenage girl, you try a lot of things out, see which ways work best for you. It’s like you can feel the poison bubbling under your skin, all the time. I recognized this in other girls. I could see them clawing at their skin, lashing out at others, trying everything they could possibly dream up. So they cut themselves, make themselves sick, scream at their mothers, smoke, drink, send pictures to the wrong person, do things they might not want to do. Because literally anything, anything that might make things go away for five minutes, is worth it.

By fourteen, I felt like a veteran. In my mind, I had seen some shit, man. I had felt some fucking feelings. And honestly, I thought things were getting better. I was still a bit broken from things that had happen in middle school, but hey, this is high school! I had been dreaming about this forever! It has to be better, right?

At fifteen, the optimism in me had died. I woke up every day with an anchor on my chest. I went from a solid B student to barely passing. I wouldn’t go out with friends, because suddenly they were branching out, meeting new people, and I didn’t know how to handle that. My lifelong fear of men really didn’t do me any favors with boys. When you flinch every time they move a hand too quickly, and find it nearly impossible to look them in the eye without wanting to throw up, you don’t get asked out much. My mother didn’t know what to do with me, so I would spend all day, every day, locked in my room. University? Fuck no, man. I could barely get my ass out of bed as a basic daily requirement, how could I possibly want to continue my education?

Sixteen was… different. Good and bad. I had woken up from the dead, but it’s not like things just go away. I was doing well in school, I started thinking about university again, and I even hung out with friends sometimes. But things were not great internally. I gave myself over to some extremely unhealthy behavior, which went completely unnoticed. Whatever. It’s still kind of a blur to me. What can I say? I’m an almost adult, I’m allowed to not have everything figured out.

And then, like the rising sun, seventeen happened. I got better. I worked harder. I had a goal, and I was rising to the challenge. I actually enjoyed school, and sometimes, I even went to parties (and had a little bit of fun!). I gained enough control over my unhealthier behavior to start healing, even if the process has been painfully slow. I finally understood what it was like to wake up and be okay. I graduated high school and went off to the university of my choice. Not happily ever after, but I’ll save that for another time.

Now, if you’re still reading, you might be confused. Why am I listing off all the crappy shit I felt between the ages of twelve and seventeen? If you hated being a teenage girl so much, why do you love them?

Because even with every single fucking thing a teenage girl has to deal with, they still manage to do something so mind blowing, yet completely simple: love, unabashedly.

You know those girls everyone loves to shit all over? The ones who really fucking love something? Those girls, man. They take all that energy, all that circulating fire in their veins, and instead of letting it destroy them, they choose to love, ferociously. Be it a band, or a book, or a series of films. They do it to keep themselves sane, and yet we mock them for it. Teenage girls find a buoy for themselves in the sea of emotional ruin, and they hold on tighter than anyone else.

One of the most popular ways people like to hate teenage girls is to complain about their “insane” crushes on boy band members. Now, let me fucking tell you something: those big dumb crushes are what helps a teenage girl develop her sexuality in a safe environment that she can control. In her world, she can listen to One Direction and hear all these songs about how great she is, and how much these cute non-threatening boys want to make her feel special. Why is this so important? Because no one is pushing them. There’s no fourteen year old boy shoving his clammy hands down your shirt without your consent. These fantasy boys are not convincing a girl to send naked pictures, only to show all their friends and call her a slut. In the fantasy land of boy bands, the girl has all the power. And we need to stop judging them for wanting to escape into that.

I love teenage girls because even if they hate themselves, they love other people. I remember how I felt, seeing other girls go through what I was going through. It ruined me. I wanted so desperately to help them out of the muck, but when you’re submerged yourself, there’s not a lot you can do. Teenage girls understand, and they want to make sure no one else feels the way they do. I see it on websites like Tumblr all the time. It’s fucking beautiful.

I love teenage girls because society loves to blame them for everything. The self-obsessed teenage girl is always the face of the “problem” with youth today. Apparently, these superficial teenage girls who love their iPhones too much are the issue. Not, you know, the people conditioning them to believe that their worth is tied to how many Likes they got on their last selfie. No, you’re right, let’s focus on the girls who post on Facebook too much. Great.

I’m in film school now, so often I get asked, “What kind of work do you want to make?” Usually, I don’t have an answer. Good work, I guess? But thinking about it, I know what I want to do: I want to make movies for teenage girls. Stories about teenage girls with agency, who rebel, who take all that energy and channel it into something, even if it’s not necessarily positive. I want to represent the girls I love so much. Because I have been one of those girls, and I will always carry a part of that with me.

So just try and talk shit about teenage girls around me. Just fucking try it.

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commiekinkshamer:

i have no problem with pointing out that anyone of any gender can be an abuser, rapist, pedophile etc because that’s absolutely true.

but the problem with always emphasizing “yes but it happens to everyone, not just women (or people of colour, or trans* people, etc)!” is that it depoliticizes the issue.

violence is not an accident, it is reflective of social power relations that permeate society at every level

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“Like most girls, my daughter hears, “That’s a pretty dress, did you pick it yourself?” or “What lovely hair you have,” or “You have the most amazing eyelashes,” or “I like the bows on your shoes,” or “You are so cute” almost every time somebody engages in conversation with her.

If family, friends, shop assistants, complete strangers, and even Santa only remark on how girls look, rather than what they think and do, how can we expect girls to believe that they have anything more to offer the world than their beauty?” — How To Break The Ice With Little Girls That Doesn’t Involve Commenting On Their Appearance (via brute reason)

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“If you kill a person, you’re a murderer. If you steal, no one would hesitate to call you a thief. But in America, when you force yourself on someone sexually, some people will jump through flaming hoops not to call you a rapist.” — From my latest at the Guardian, When you call a rape anything but rape, you are just making excuses for rapists (via jessicavalenti)

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Men still have trouble recognizing that a woman can be complex, can have ambition, good looks, sexuality, erudition and common sense. A woman can have all those facets, and yet men, in literature and in drama, seem to need to simplify women, to polarize us as either the whore or the angel. - Natalie Dormer

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“Pornography reveals that male pleasure is inextricably tied to victimizing, hurting, exploiting; that sexual fun and sexual passion in the privacy of the male imagination are inseparable from the brutality of male history. The private world of sexual dominance that men demand as their right and their freedom is the mirror image of the public world of sadism and atrocity that men consistently and self- righteously deplore. It is in the male experience of pleasure that one finds the meaning of male history.” — Andrea Dworkin, Pornography: Men Possessing Women (via staininyourbrain)

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“17% of cardiac surgeons are women, 17% of tenured professors are women. It just goes on and on. And isn’t that strange that that’s also the percentage of women in crowd scenes in movies? What if we’re actually training people to see that ratio as normal so that when you’re an adult, you don’t notice? …We just heard a fascinating and disturbing study where they looked at the ratio of men and women in groups. And they found that if there’s 17% women, the men in the group think it’s 50-50. And if there’s 33% women, the men perceive that as there being more women in the room than men.” — Source: NPR: Hollywood Needs More Women

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“I don’t have the language for this substratum of violence we refuse to name as such. I don’t mean the non-rape-rape, the assaults that don’t result in bruises. This article is not a repetition of the now-cliché reminder that most rape isn’t a stranger jumping out of the bushes. I mean the texture of 20-something heterosexual sex in America, the insidious habits and habituations that look exactly like violence except, somehow, we’ve decided they aren’t violent. We chalk it up to awkwardness, or kink, or just plain old misogyny that is so commonplace and inevitable that resisting it would be like protesting the weather. I find that friends who have been raped before and named that for what it was are no more willing to insist upon the inexcusability of this excused category. Nor are the organizers, the feminists with boots on the ground and the right vocabulary at the tip of their tongues. A woman is only allotted so much anger in her life. In crossing that limit she is rendered hysterical and invisible all at once. What is bad enough to cash your tokens? We’ve decided that if it isn’t what we call violence, we will count our blessings and take it like a woman. (“Women are afraid that men will kill them.”)

The ubiquitous negotiations and morning-after bruises and disappearing condoms aren’t what we talk about when we talk about sexual violence.” — That bad (via brutereason)

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malesexistbehavior:

this-tragic-affair:

ok so all these guys who are like “men have it hard too!!! we’re expected to be manly and emotionless, we have feelings!!!” do realize that it’s other men who enforce those standards on guys. literally guys created those standards to be more powerful than women. so maybe instead of getting angry at women for talking about their oppression, realize that you should be fighting with women against unfair gender expectations and inequality

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“When you want to fall — fall. Evaporate and condensate, but when you rain, come down as a fucking hurricane.

If the birds stop chirping, if the sunlight forgets you, if you’ve got your shirttail caught in the fence of your spine, and you have no way of getting loose,

remember that I am here, that I will bail you out of your own prison, that I will lay with you the morning after you fall in love and tell you that it’s okay to love, that it’s okay to trust another human being with more than you knew you could.

I will tell you how I held you as a child, listened to your heartbeat on those sleepless nights, that I loved your small body and your pebble fists and blessed the skeleton inside of you —

that you are not beautiful because a boy tells you so, but beautiful because you exist.

And I apologize for giving you such nervous hands and a sine wave heartbeat. And when you start putting question marks after everything you say — know that

I may not always have the answers, but together, we can try to make sense of it all.

I’ll take you back to my West Virginia. My Gloucester. My honeysuckles and tool sheds. The chicken coops. The abandoned loves. I’ll show you what the August grass feels like. I’ll distract you with tree roots, with atlases, with lessons about the sea, and until your question marks are bent into arrows, I will not

stop. So shoot them blindly. Hurt and be hurt. Be the bird as much as you are the hand.

For I will stand behind you, breaking every vow that I made to protect you. When I notice your wings are peeking out from beneath your shirt collar, I’ll

tie my hands back from clipping them. I will hide every rope in the country so that the love inside of me doesn’t tether your ankles to home.

You are seventeen, and you are free.

But when you want to come home, I’ll be here. In the wind chimes, in the small moths that flutter towards your light, in the way dawn still breaks the same blue eggs in every place that you decide to go,

I’ll be here. Less a ghost than the wind. Less the wind than a soft hum in the back of your throat, telling you that it’s okay to sing, that it’s okay to bray,

that your song is a song that you’ll spend the rest of your life trying to understand.

That when the birds talk you into flying south, it’s okay to pick up and leave.” — "To My Daughter At Seventeen," Shinji Moon (via commovente)

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“What To Do When Your Boyfriend’s Asshole Best Friend Says, “Hey, Never Trust Anything That Bleeds For Seven Days And Doesn’t Die, Right?” OR The Only Poem I’ll Ever Write About Periods. Don’t excuse him because he’s had at least three lite beers and is sweating through his black button down that his mom or exgirlfriend probably bought him. Don’t excuse him because he’s been turned down by the last six girls he went on dates with after meeting them on tindr with a picture that’s seven years old Don’t excuse him because he’s usually such a nice guy because you don’t want to be a bitch because you don’t want to cause a scene because when you were seventeen your sister told you no one likes an angry feminist

Tell him, Hey, Asshole: Let me explain something to you. Every goddamn motherfucking month since I was eleven, a part of me tore itself to shreds ripped itself apart inside me and then remade itself.

So yes, I bleed for seven days and I don’t die You know what else can do that? Gods. Immortal beings. Things of legend. Fuck, I can even create life.

So I say, never trust anything that can’t bleed for seven days and not die. You know what that makes it? Weak Fallible Mortal. So let’s see, hon, What you’re made of. If you can bleed for seven days and not die.

Rip out his jugular with your teeth. And when he bleeds for seven seconds and dies, spit on his corpse and say, I thought not.” — Katherine Tucker (determined-in-slc)

-------------------------------------

“It’s not that women shouldn’t get plastic surgery; it’s that they should make every effort for that surgery to be invisible, seamless, unnoticeable. Good plastic surgery is OK, but “bad” plastic surgery — surgery that makes itself visible — now that’s abject.

Why? Because it shows that the work of performing ideal femininity is just that: work. And ideal femininity never illuminates itself as a construction; it must present itself as “natural.” Which is also why it comes as such a surprise when someone like Beyoncé speaks openly about the exhaustive regimen necessary to get her body into post-baby shape: It speaks truth to the lie of the effortless, immaculate, eternally young and fit female form.

Plastic-surgery shaming is thus tantamount to blaming the victims of this ideal for working so hard to achieve what we’ve told them, for decades, they must do. It’s bullshit, it’s unfeminist, and it’s just one of many ways in which society damns women for taking its ideals concerning sexuality or the body to their natural extension.” — What’s Really Behind The Ridicule Of Renée Zellweger’s Face

People were cruel about her appearance for years (I’ve heard those stupid lemon-sucking “jokes” countless times), then act shocked that she altered her appearance and criticise her for that as well. Whether you get plastic surgery or not, you just can’t win.

(via fucknosexistcostumes)

----------------------------------------

anonymous asked: As a guy in terrified. If I piss a woman off, all she has to do is falsely accuse me of rape, then my life will be ruined. I'll be labeled a sex offender and go to prison, because the judge always listens to the woman as they see her as a damsel in distress. I'm terrified. The accusations are happening more and more because of feminism. This is why we need Men's Rights.

okcreepsters answered: As a woman I’m terrified. If I piss a man off, he might threaten, assault, rape, beat, batter, or murder me; then my life will be ruined. I’ll be labeled a “slut” who “wanted it” and have my character dragged through the mud, either by law officers, my friends and/or family, or the court of public opinion, because of rape culture. Violence against women is happening more and more because of men like you. We are literally being killed, tortured, and abused by male entitlement.

This is why we need Feminism.

S

okcreepsters:

yeahlikethedeliveryservice:

If judges “Always listen to the woman” then why is it that 97% of rapists are not punished even when they have been convicted? And although nearly one in evry five women actually does report being raped, anywhere from 54% to 90% of rapes go unreported, because women know that 94% of reported cases don’t end in a conviction, they typically end in the woman being accused of being a slut, sometimes facing massive social shaming that can end in serious consequences, such as academic retaliation if you accuse the wrong boy at school, further sexual violence and even discharge from the military if you report your C.O., and the ever-present fear that a man you accuse will come after you, rape you again, beat you, possibly even kill you—and if they didn’t care the first time, why would they care if it happens again?

Trust me, sweetheart. your fear is completely unfounded. Men do not need activists for their rights. Men need to wake the fuck up to the privilege and rights they already have and stop acting like scared children every time the faintest whisper of a glimmer of what it must be like to be a woman threatens to become even the faintest part of their reality.

-----------------------------------------

clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead:

"The only thing more disturbing than that paradigm is the fact that most rapists are normal guys, guys we might work beside or socialise with, our neighbours or even members of our family. Where men’s violence against women is normalised in our society, we often we compartmentalise it to fit our view of the victim. If a prostitute is raped or beaten, we may consider it an awful occupational hazard ‘given her line of work.’ We rarely think ‘she didn’t get beaten – somebody (i.e a man) beat her’. Her line of work is dangerous, but mainly because there are men who want to hurt women. If a husband batters his wife, we often unthinkingly put it down to socio-economic factors or alcohol and drugs rather than how men and boys are taught and socialised to be men and view women.

…

What would make this tragedy even more tragic would be if we were to separate what happened to Jill from cases of violence against women where the victim knew, had a sexual past with, talked to the perpetrator in a bar, or went home with him. It would be tragic if we did not recognise that Bayley’s previous crimes were against prostitutes, and that the social normalisation of violence against a woman of a certain profession and our inability to deal with or talk about these issues, socially and legally, resulted in untold horror for those victims, and led to the brutal murder of my wife. We cannot separate these cases from one another because doing so allows us to ignore the fact that all these crimes have exactly the same cause – violent men, and the silence of non-violent men.”

from When Will We Stop Being Shocked At How Normal A Rapist Seemed by Jill Meagher’s husband

-----------------------------------------

“Female-assigned intersex kids’ vaginal canal size is also assessed by doctors, to ensure that it’s long enough to fit a penis inside of it. Doctors might surgically construct or re-construct vaginas, which can result in a host of health problems and necessitate multiple, multiple surgeries. This is especially the case since most intersex kids have these surgeries very young, and when their bodies grow into their adult forms, more surgeries are necessary to keep their vagina size in proportion. Non-surgical methods are also used to increase or maintain vaginal length by regularly using medical dildos to stretch the vagina over months and years. (It’s kind of like braces for your vagina, but much, much worse.) Just like there are no standards for how long a clitoris “can” be before it’s classified as a penis, there aren’t absolute standards as to how long a vagina is for it to be of “normal” length. I had a dilation procedure performed for almost every exam I had with intersex doctors from the time I was 8 until I was 16, so that they could check how long my vagina was as I grew. I absolutely hated these procedures. I mean, imagine a man as old as your father or your grandfather, who you don’t know, inserting a medical dildo into you each time you saw him, knowing that you can’t question the doctor’s orders and just accept that you have to undergo these uncomfortable procedures for your health. Imagine a decade or so later, realizing that these procedures did nothing to track your health, and had everything to do with grown men feeling good about the fact that you could fuck some dude someday like a “normal girl”. That all those traumatizing procedures weren’t actually medically relevant at all, and it actually was within my right to refuse those examinations.

I didn’t know any of that at the time.

I also had no idea that I wouldn’t want to ultimately have the kind of sex they assumed I’d be having, adding yet another layer of this-was-totally-unnecessary/messed-up to my history.

Other kids shouldn’t have to go through this. Other adults shouldn’t have revelations some day far into the future that what was happening to them WASN’T okay, and their traumatic feelings ARE valid, and the whole system of how intersex people are conceptualized and “treated” IS entirely fucked.

And it’s gotta change. We’ve gotta change it.” — Claudia at Autostraddle

I just read this article and was reminded once again how invisible the intersex community often is… we need to signal boost this shit to let people know that this kind of “medical treatment” is NOT okay.

(via bossybussy)

when something qualifies as rape or sexual assault in any other context it should not become magically acceptable when doctors do it.  i don’t know why that’s such a difficult concept for people to understand.

(via rapeculturerealities)

----------------------------------------

things i need white feminists to do before i will take you seriously callingoutbigotry:

eshusplayground:

so-treu:

i need you to come to terms with the way white women have facilitated some of the most unspeakable violence upon black and brown and indigenous people, bodies, and community. often in the name of white womanhood. often in the name of freedom. often in the name of feminism.

i need you to understand that you killed Emmitt Till. i need you to think about all of the black men and boys that have been murdered because either you accused them or your men took it upon themselves to defend *your* honor. i need you to look at pictures of lynched bodies and think about what role you played in it.

i need you to know the names of the women raped by U.S. military in countries we invaded, in part because feminists said we needed to save the women and/or children and supported the various invasions.

i need you to know that those reproductive rights you all are up in arms about were created via the destruction and maiming of black and brown bodies. i need you to know who Anarcha, Lucy, and Betsy are, and what was done to them. i need you to know the names of the Puerto Rican women who were lied to and who died so that The Pill could bring you your precious sexual liberation. i need you to know the central role white women played in sterilization programs that targeted black women, poor women, anyone they deemed too “feeble” to procreate. i need you to think about why more big name feminist organizations are up in arms about the most recent kick up about contraception than about sterilized black women getting compensated for what was done to them.

i need you to understand that at this point, it’s not about privilege. it’s not about you being able to find products that work with your hair no matter where you go. it’s about people’s lives. it’s about WOC lives and a centuries old disregard white women have shown for them. it’s about that fact that white women have been an active agent in the destruction of our communities, our histories, and our families. for centuries.

and WOC don’t owe you a damn thing. not. one. thing.

so get that through your skulls then maybe we can work together. maybe. A good resource on the dangerous, painful, and deadly medical malpractice and experimentation inflicted on Black women for the benefit of white women is Medical Apartheid: The Dark History of Medical Experimentation on Black Americans from Colonial Times to the Present by Harriet A. Washington

-----------------------------------------

In pop culture, girls who crush hopelessly on guys they can’t have are painted as just that – hopeless. Over and over again, we’re taught that girls who openly express sexual or romantic interest in guys who don’t want them are pitiable, stalkerish, desperate, crazy bitches. More often than not, they’re also portrayed as ugly –  whether physically, emotionally or both –  in order to further establish their undesirability as an objective fact. Both narratively and, as a consequence, in real life, men are given free reign to snub, abuse, mislead and talk down to such women: we’re raised to believe that female desire is unseemly, so that any consequent shaming is therefore deserved. There is no female-equivalent Friend Zone terminology because, in the language of our culture, a man’s romantic choices are considered sacrosanct and inviolable. If a girl has been told no, then she has only herself to blame for anything that happens next – but if a woman says no, then she must not really mean it. Or, if she does, she shouldn’t: the rejected man is a universally sympathetic figure, and everyone from moviegoers to platonic onlookers will scream at her to just give him a chance, as though her rejection must always be unfounded rather than based on the fact that he had a chance, and blew it. And even then, give him another one! The pathos of Single Nice Guys can only be eased by pity-sex with unwilling women that blossoms into romance!

—Lamenting The Friend Zone, Or: The “Nice Guy” Approach To Perpetrating Sexist Bullshit

----------------------------------------

Six in 10 girls quit activities they love because of how they feel about their looks

Sorry that this isn’t Architecture related, but this is a serious issue. I can tell you from a personal point of view that I actually quit hockey when I was younger because of my self esteem issues. Girls and boys all around the world find a sport they love, but have it cut short because they do not like the way they look.

Girls and boys need their coaches, parents, friends etc. to help them through this. They need to be told that they should focus on their love for whatever sport it is instead of feeling bad about the way they look.

Pass this on, and let people know that everybody has a chance to be who they want to be without thinking about the way they look.

------------------------------------------

When My Daughter Asks If Anyone Will Ever Love Her

writingsforwinter:

I will tell her, history is filled with ruins,

the history of love most all, and you may encounter several of them

along the way. But most of those ruins were caused by wars,

and your heart is so open and ready, so wanting,

that even a sniper would never dare to shoot it down.

I will tell her, you are skin filled with questions and bones

scored by bitten-back words, and yes, someone

will want to hear all of them one day,

no matter how long it takes to empty you

of the desire to apologize as soon as you open your mouth.

When my daughter asks if anyone will ever love her,

I will tell her, whether or not you know it yet,

someone you’ve never met before is hoping

to become someone you have met before, and will continue to meet

for the rest of your life.

Will tell her, the alphabet was created for communication

but you will know when someone loves you

by the way they forget every single letter

just by looking at the back of your neck.

Will tell her, you are beautiful in each time zone-

and one day, you will find someone

who will tell you so in every single one.

And finally, to my daughter I will say:

but all of this is unimportant

unless you love yourself. ------------------------------------------------------

wondermaid:

if you think gender has nothing to do with rape you need to fucking do your research

here look i’ll do some for you

99% of rapists are men 91% of victims are women no one is saying that men can’t be raped we would NEVER say that. but when we are talking about the prevalence of rape culture in a patriarchal society, that’s when we are focusing on women. and you all only ever bring up male survivors to derail discussions and further your anti-feminist (misogynist) agendas anyway. --------------------------------------------------------

mikroblogolas:

society teaches women that if they haven’t been kissed by a man or had sex with a man, there must be something wrong with them. men learn that if women don’t want to kiss or have sex with them, there must be something wrong with women (and possibly the government and world), not themselves. ------------------------------------------

Gender dictates our physical movement, how our walk should look, our mannerisms, how we sit, the tone of our voice, it dumbs girls down, it restricts our choice of childhood toys and teenaged sports, it chases us out of STEM subjects, it tracks us into lower paying career opportunities, it guilts us into constant caregiving, it despises us as we age, it mocks and belittles our concerns, it says we lie about rape, it prostitutes us, it marries us and beats us, it denies us control of our own bodies, it keeps our brain-dead bodies alive against our express wishes, so that the government may harvest another citizen from us, it aborts us or abandons us 10 days after birth simply because we are female.

Women and girls are oppressed on the basis of our biological sex. That oppression takes many forms. The social control system which is used to frame all of this oppression as natural and desirous is called Gender. Femininity, with all its harmful effects, is forced onto females.

” —

ppp

(via

radical-bias

) ------------------------------------------------------

modifiedmummytobe:

Instead of me having to explain why I don’t like rape jokes, how about you explain why you find them funny. ----------------------------------------------------- “

Radical feminists often argue that BDSM practice is about degrading, humiliating, violating and torturing women. It is patriarchal violence against women—whether it occurs in your bedroom, on your computer screen, or is simulated during your lunchtime book reading.

We do not blame women who participate in it, but we will analyze it through a feminist lens.

BDSM is the legitimization of domestic violence against women. Case in point: The Feminist and the Cowboy. Author Alisa Valdes wrote an erotic semi-autobiographical book about a dominant lover who violently f’ked her under the guise of consensual “play”. After her book was released, Vales wrote a blog post detailing the real life abuse that the “cowboy” inflicted on her. Though the abuse was framed as consensual in her book, her real life experience with the cowboy involved being raped, verbally abused, threatened, and abandoned once he discovered her pregnancy.

Similarly, during a recent BDSM play abuse session, abuser Steven Lock strangled a woman he had recently met on a dating site with a rope, chained her to his bed, lashed her 14 times, f’kd her, and then left her chained. She had to call a friend to help her escape, but Lock was cleared of all abuse charges once he claimed the assault had been “consensual”.

BDSM occurs in the context of patriarchal rape culture, where women always “deserve” the rape, violence, abuse and death that men dish out to them, and women who object to this treatment are called names, and dismissed out-of-hand.

One of the names we are called is “sex negative”, which as many of us know, is actually a code word for “frigid” where “frigid”, as many feminists know, is actually a pejorative referring to our refusal to please men. Radical feminists embrace our refusal to give a f’k about what men want, so we are happy to be considered prude if it means liberation for women.

We are also told that we are “slut shaming” when we object to BDSM, even though we know that no woman is a slut, and no woman is to blame for the ways that men abuse her.

We are told that we are “not respecting the agency” of women who “choose” to engage in BDSM when recognize that playing a submissive role in sexual situations is likely born out of Societal Stockholm Syndrome. We never, however, blame the women who participate in the practice– our blame sits squarely on the shoulders of men who dominate women.

In so blaming, we are told that we are “kink shaming” the men who like to beat and sexually torture women for fun. A good example of one such man is Snowdrop Explodes who was invited as a “BDSM expert” to talk about BDSM and abuse on the site Womanist Musings. It was revealed that this so-called “expert” had in the past blogged without apology about his plan to rape and murder a woman in his local park. These are the types of men we are “kink shaming”.

Women who suffer abuse from BDSM are often blamed for having not “said the safe word” when they express discomfort about the abuse they received, which is clearly a case of blaming the victim.

Often women who report on the abuse they experience are silenced, as Vales was when her agent forced her to take down her confessional blog post, or as her new boyfriend does by thanking the cowboy for “taming her”.

Radical feminist are infuriated by this normalization of male abuse of women. (Just this morning I saw a copy of 50 Shades of Gray for 30% off at the local grocery store ferchrissakes). But there is one objection sometimes brought up when discussing BDSM that I haven’t yet addressed. That objection is: What about the submissive men in BDSM? They consent to violent beatings and humiliation too, so how can you say BDSM is strictly violence against women?”

Firstly I’ll point out the fairly obvious: violence, humiliation, and abuse against any person is dehumanizing and wrong.

Leaving this point aside, however, I’ll note that the majority of BDSM occurs in a male-dominant/female submissive context.

In preparation for her documentary The Price of Pleasure, Chung Sun studied 50 of the 275 most popular pornographic films as noted by best-selling and most-rented list reported by Adult Video News. In the films, men being spanked constituted less than 3% of the total spankings that occurred onscreen. In fact,

“most of the targets of physical aggression were women, who usually responded with expressions of pleasure (encouragement, sexual moans, etc) or with no change at all in facial expression or interruption of action.” (quoted from Big Porn, Inc, page 172-173)

So we know that male recipients of aggression constituted less than 3% of the on-screen spankings tallied in the study. The fact that the vast majority of recipients of violence on screen in the most rented videos tells us something about BDSM. It tells us that BDSM is an instrument of violence, and the target of that violence is women.

Obviously, the small number of male submissives will never be able to “even out” the harms inflicted against women in BDSM. It is never okay for women to be abused by men.

Radical feminists know that patriarchal society is set up with a sex-based hierarchy, and that hierarchy is perpetuated using gender. Masculinity is the gender males are socialized into, and it consists in valuing domination, power, invasion, and taking-up-space. Femininity is the gender females are socialized into and consists in submission, powerlessness, having no boundaries, and taking-up-as-little-space-as-possible. As Lierre Keith puts it, “Gender is who gets to be human, and who gets hurt”.

In the context of life as a man in the dominator class, a small percentage of men may wish to “try on” what they perceive to be a feminized role during sexual interactions. They may find themselves turned on by imagining what it might be like to be sexually terrorized. They may get a boner from temporarily adopting the submissive—aka feminine—role. These submissive roles are often explicitly feminized, and submissive men are often referenced as “sissies”– a word used to humiliate men by implying that they bear some resemblance to their much-despised counterpart: woman.

But radical feminists know that “trying on” a submissive role is the action of a supremely privileged individual, who, as a part of his Sunday-Funday-f’k-fest, wants to “spice it up” by having his nipples tweaked. But he can always put away his ball gag and join the world of men and masculinity. We women, however, cannot escape the day-to-day sexual terrorism that he vacations in, because it is our lives.

The existence of male submissives in BDSM practice does nothing to excuse, nullify, or disprove the fact that BDSM is violence against women. We know that liberated sexuality does not follow the patriarchal model of dominance and submission, and that BDSM is the normalization of domestic violence.

” —

Liberation Collective: BDSM is Violence Against Women

--------------------------------------------------------

smoochums:

women grow hair on their boobs and their butts and their legs and their arms and their stomachs and their face and really anywhere their genetics decides to have hair and it is perfectly normal what isnt normal is men who have never touched a razor trying to shame women for not looking like a hairless baby ----------------------------------------------

shakethecobwebs:

deathexclamations:

shakethecobwebs:

boycott dudes who manipulate you into meeting their emotional or sexual needs but won’t date you 2k14 why the fuck are you interested in someone like that in the first place ? Fuck anyone who tries to manipulate you. manipulation, by its very definition, is not a choice.

so maybe you should take your victim-blaming somewhere else.

----------------------------------

“Under the current ‘tyranny of slenderness’ women are forbidden to become large or massive; they must take up as little space as possible. The very contours of a woman’s body takes on as she matures - the fuller breasts and rounded hips - have become distateful. The body by which a woman feels herself judged and which by rigorous discipline she must try to assume is the body of early adolescence, slight and unformed, a body lacking flesh or substance, a body in whose very contours the image of immaturity has been inscribed. The requirement that a woman maintain a smooth and hairless skin carries further the theme of inexperience, for an infantilized face must accompany her infantilized body, a face that never ages or furrows its brow in thought. The face of the ideally feminine woman must never display the marks of character, wisdom, and experience that we so admire in men.” — Sandra Lee Bartky,

Foucault, Femininity, and the Modernization of Patriarchal Power

(via

sociophilia

) ----------------------------------------------------------

altonym:

why does EVERY thing made for male survivors have to have some part of it that goes “SEE, this happens to MEN too” with the implicit tone of “so there, misandrists, the dark secret you were trying to hide!!!!”

like do you really think that for every pound not spent on male survivors, another chocolate truffle gets purchased for the minibar at the women’s shelter jazz lounge?? nobody gives a shit about survivors in general and that actually disproportionately affects women so I just don’t get what the point is, and I am literally within the subset you are claiming to speak on behalf of

say “these are male survivors”, say “the abuse of men can sometimes differ in nature” (because for some forms of abuse that’s true) but you do nothing for us by posing male survivors as a group as some kind of anti-feminist gotcha, it’s just dehumanising, it’s clear to me that people who do that don’t actually care about abuse survivors but do care about slam-dunking their angry message board reply ------------------------------------------------------

“The point is not for women simply to take power out of men’s hands, since that wouldn’t change anything about the world. It’s a question precisely of destroying that notion of power.��

― Simone de Beauvoir

--------------------------------------------------------

herbackrowkings:

lalondes:

>teenage actress’s private nudes get leaked

>teenage actress is reviled as a slut and a whore and a bad role model

>james franco asks a seventeen-year-old girl if he can meet her in a private hotel room

>james franco gets to go on saturday night live and joke about what a silly doofus he is for soliciting sex from a girl literally half his age ------------------------------------------------------

howunpleasant:

when i was little i actually questioned why girls were supposed to cross their legs and when i was told “because boys will look up your skirt” i said “then tell boys not to look up our skirts” and my grandma got really angry with me but my uncle thought i was great and gave me a high five -----------------------------------------------------

“To expose the victimization of women by men is to be blamed for creating it and for making women into passive victims. The liberals fail to recognize that women’s victimization can be acknowledged without labeling women passive. Passive and victim do not necessarily go together. It is the liberals who equate victimization with passivity. It is they who devise this equation […] It seems obvious that one can recognize women as victims of surrogacy, pornography, and prostitution without stripping them of agency and without depriving them of some ability to act under oppressive conditions.” — Janice G. Raymond, “Sexual and Reproductive Liberalism”. (via

womentoadmire

) --------------------------------------------------------

“Children who are victimized through sexual abuse often begin to develop deeply held tenets that shape their sense of self: My worth is my sexuality. I’m dirty and shameful. I have no right to my own physical boundaries. That shapes their ideas about the world around them. No one will believe me. Telling the truth results in bad consequences. People can’t be trusted. It doesn’t take long for children to begin to act in accordance with these belief systems.

For girls who have experienced incest, sexual abuse, or rape, the boundaries between love, sex, and pain become blurred. Secrets are normal, and shame is a constant. The lessons learned during sexual abuse are valuable ones for recruitment into the commercial sex industry. As Andrea Dworkin once said, “Incest is boot camp for prostitution.” Numerous studies estimate that 70 to 90 percent of commercially sexually exploited youth and adult women in the sex industry were sexually abused prior to their recruitment. No other industry can boast of such a large correlation between early sexual abuse and future employment. Sexual abuse lays the groundwork.” — Girls Like Us, Rachel Lloyd, p 65 (via

smashesthep

-------------------------------------------------------

“Rape jokes are not jokes. Woman-hating jokes are not jokes. These guys are telling you what they think. When you laugh along to get their approval, you give them yours.” — Thomas Millar,

Meet the Predators

 ------------------------------------------------------

“I reject all of this stupid, boring, outdated shit. I reject your numbers. I reject the idea that my personality is a negligible variable in the equation of my happiness. I reject the implication that you understand my relationship better than I do. Do not insult my intelligence by telling me that the best way to avoid divorce is to marry a stranger when you’re too young to even know yourself. Don’t try to bluff me into swallowing your lie that a world with more marriages is objectively a better world. You cannot trick me into believing that divorce is a failure of society and not a grand fucking triumph, and you will not drag me and the rest of society into the past with you.

It’s no coincidence that the people most concerned with clapping a chastity belt on the entire earth and swallowing the key are the people currently (and historically) in power in our country. And it’s also no coincidence that the people with the most to gain by maintaining “traditional” family structures—by keeping women dependent and docile and shutting everyone else up—have the least nuanced understanding of how actual human beings interact with one another romantically. It’s almost as if they’ve never known what it’s like to really connect with someone as a human being—to love a partner as an equal, not as a bank account or a body. What a pathetic, lonely life that must be.” —

Sex Is Not an ‘Economy’ and You Are Not Merchandise

--------------------------------------------------------

“The violence we teach our sons in teaching them to Be Men is the same that keeps us up at night worrying about our daughters.” — (via moeyhashy

) ------------------------------------------------------ “

Ambition is demanded of us because we know mediocrity is not an option. When society tells women that if we are just averagely good-looking, or averagely smart, or reasonably high-achieving, we will never be loved and safe, perfectionism is an adaptive strategy. We learn that if we want love and security, we have to be perfect, and if it doesn’t work out, well, that means we just weren’t good enough. And we know it probably won’t work out well. Girls aren’t fools. They know what is being done to them. They know what means for their futures in terms of money and power.

Girls get it. An under-reported, crucial facet of the study is the extent and cynicism of girls’ concerns about economic equality and unpaid work. A full 65% of girls aged 11-21 are worried about the cost of childcare, and while 58% say they “would like to become a leader in their chosen profession, 46% of them worry that having children will negatively affect their career.

Girls know perfectly well that structural sexism means they can’t have everything they’re being told they must have. They are striving to have it all everyway, striving to have everything and be everything like good girls are supposed to, and it hasn’t broken them yet, for good or ill. That’s is one reason young women still do so well in school and at college despite our good grades not translating to real-world success. It’s one reason we’re so good at getting those entry-level service jobs: we are not burdened by the excess of ego, the desire to be treated like a human being first, that prevents many young men from engaging proactively with an economy that just wants self-effacing drones trained to smile till it hurts.

The press just loves to act concerned about half-naked young ladies, preferably with illustrations to facilitate the concern. Somehow nothing changes. And maybe that’s the point. Maybe part of the function of the constant stream of news about young girls hurting and hating themselves isn’t to raise awareness. Maybe part of it is designed to be reassuring.

It must be comforting, if you’re invested in the status quo, to hear that young women are punished and made miserable when they misbehave.

I’ve said this before, but I’ll repeat it: for all those knuckle-clutching articles about how girls everywhere are about to pirouette into twerking, puking, self-hating whorishness, we do not actually care about young women - not, that is, about female people who happen to be young. Instead, we care about Young Women (TM), fantasy Young Women as a semiotic skip for all our cultural anxieties. We value girls as commodities without paying them the respect that both their youth and their personhood deserves. Being fifteen is fucked up enough already without having the expectations, moral neuroses and guilty lusts of an entire culture projected onto this perfect empty shell you’re somehow supposed to be. Hollow yourself out and starve yourself down until you can swallow the shame of the world.

We care about young women as symbols, not as people.

” — Girl trouble: we care about young women as symbols, not as people

(via sociolab)

-----------------------------------------------------

“It is not just sexual assault survivors who need their abortion covered. Yes, there is an added dimension of cruelty when you’re talking about denying women who get pregnant as a result of rape care and coverage. But we cannot create a hierarchy of “good” and “bad” abortions. Or of “deserving” women. One in three American women will have an abortion, and the circumstances behind that pregnancy is none of our business—and it certainly should have no bearing on whether or not women can afford to access care.” — Jessica Valenti,

Please Don’t Call it ‘Rape Insurance’: Michigan’s Anti-Choice Bill Hurts All Women

--------------------------------------------------------

“The messages you received from your family or your childhood experiences may have caused you to believe that assertiveness is unacceptable or even dangerous. Practice saying the following: I have the right to be treated with respect by others. I have the right to express my feelings and opinions. I have the right to say no without feeling guilty. I have the right to ask for what I want. I have the right to make my own mistakes. I have the right to pursue happiness.” — Nice Girl Syndrome, Beverly Engel

------------------------------------------------

Probably no man has ever troubled to imagine how strange his life would appear to himself if it were unrelentingly assessed in terms of his maleness; if everything he wore, said, or did had to be justified by reference to female approval; if he were compelled to regard himself, day in day out, not as a member of society, but merely (salva reverentia) as a virile member of society. If the centre of his dress-consciousness were his cod-piece, his education directed to making him a spirited lover and meek paterfamilias; his interests held to be natural only in so far as they were sexual. If from school and lecture-room, Press and pulpit, he heard the persistent outpouring of a shrill and scolding voice, bidding him remember his biological function. If he were vexed by continual advice how to add a rough male touch to his typing, how to be learned without losing his masculine appeal, how to combine chemical research with seduction, how to play bridge without incurring the suspicion of impotence. If, instead of allowing with a smile that “women prefer cavemen,” he felt the unrelenting pressure of a while social structure forcing him to order all his goings in conformity with that pronouncement.

He would hear (and would he like hearing?) the female counterpart of Dr. P*** informing him: “I am no supporter of the Horseback Hall doctrine of ‘gun-tail, plough-tail and stud’ as the only spheres for masculine action; but we do need a more definite conception of the nature and scope of man’s life.” In any book on sociology he would find, after the main portion dealing with human needs and rights, a supplementary chapter devoted to “The Position of the Male in the Perfect State.” His newspaper would assist him with a “Men’s Corner,” telling him how, by the expenditure of a good deal of money and a couple of hours a day, he could attract the girls and retain his wife’s affection; and when he had succeeded in capturing a mate, his name would be taken from him, and society would present him with a special title to proclaim his achievement. People would write books called, “History of the Male,” or “Males of the Bible,” or “The Psychology of the Male,” and he would be regaled daily with headlines, such as “Gentleman-Doctor’s Discovery,” “Male-Secretary Wins Calcutta Sweep,” “Men-Artists at the Academy.” If he gave an interview to a reporter, or performed any unusual exploit, he would find it recorded in such terms as these: “Professor Bract, although a distinguished botanist, is not in any way an unmanly man. He has, in fact, a wife and seven children. Tall and burly, the hands with which he handles his delicate specimens are as gnarled and powerful as those of a Canadian lumberjack, and when I swilled beer with him in his laboratory, he bawled his conclusions at me in a strong, gruff voice that implemented the promise of his swaggering moustache.” […]

He would be edified by solemn discussions about “Should Men Serve in Drapery Establishments?” and acrimonious ones about “Tea-Drinking Men”; by cross-shots of public affairs “from the masculine angle,” and by irritable correspondence about men who expose their anatomy on beaches (so masculine of them), conceal it in dressing-gowns (too feminine of them), think about nothing but women, pretend an unnatural indifference to women, exploit their sex to get jobs, lower the tone of the office by their sexless appearance, and generally fail to please a public opinion which demands the incompatible. And at dinner-parties he would hear the wheedling, unctuous, predatory female voice demand: “And why should you trouble your handsome little head about politics?”

If, after a few centuries of this kind of treatment, the male was a little self-conscious, a little on the defensive, and a little bewildered about what was required of him, I should not blame him. If he presented the world with a major social problem, I should scarcely be surprised. It would be more surprising if he retained any rag of sanity and self-respect.

” — From the 1947 Dorothy L. Sayers essay “

The Human-Not-Quite-Human” oh my god, this is from 1947. doesn’t it show how much things HAVEN’T changed that I read through this whole thing assuming it was from a current article or essay, until I got to the date at the end?

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kittiepawz:

Rape is the only crime in which the public strongly believe the perpetrator’s identity should be protected.

As rape is a crime which is overwhelmingly committed by men against women, policy enacted to protect the perpetrator’s identity would technically be sex discrimination.

The fact that rape is the only crime in which the victim is typically believed to be lying is due to the cultural myth that women are innately vindictive and attention seeking. This myth is so powerful that it has even filtered into the justice system; in both the UK and US it is not uncommon for detectives to assume a woman is lying about rape within the first 24 hours of meeting with her due to judgements about her sexual history or her failure to behave how a female rape victim is ‘supposed’ to act. The fact that only women are placed under this scrutiny when reporting rape is sex discrimination.

The fact that women like layla ibrahim, who had copious amounts of physical evidence and testimonies from professionals confirming that she was indeed raped, was sent to prison for making a false rape allegation, is not new or even particularly unusual. In 2012 30 women in the UK were wrongly sent to prison for false rape accusations. If you want to talk about people getting wrongly sent to prison, perhaps we should take a look at these women. In almost all of the cases it was discovered that the police failed to do their jobs (failing to follow up on witness accounts, failing to either collect or process evidence, forcing a confession from the victim when they decided based entirely on their own judgements that she was lying).

The belief that false rape accusations are incredibly common and women are very likely to falsify claims is sexism and, because of the fact that this sexism has real life implications for these women, it is discrimination. The fact that this point is proven over and over by legal professionals, academics and actual living proof of the countless women who have experienced this discrimination and yet people still choose to ignore the facts is willful ignorance.

Sexism is alive and well in 2013, and the fact that people who contribute to this discrimination can even attempt to deny that fact is truly astounding. ------------------------------------------------------------

“It can be said, quite credibly, that excessive consumption of alcohol is connected to a wide array of health and behavioral problems. It can also be said – credibly again – that the incapacitation caused by extreme intoxication makes women more vulnerable to sexual assault.

But here’s the thing: the first kind of connection is sustained by mere biology; the second is not. The nausea, the headache, the loss of concentration, the risk of addiction – all these ills are connected to excessive drinking because of the effects of alcohol on the human body, and they give men as well as women some excellent reasons to practice moderation.

But the special risk that drunkenness poses to women – that’s due to a social climate that tolerates sexual predation. When we tell young women to stay sober in order to avoid getting raped, we send the message that we do not intend to change that social climate, that we have chosen to regard misogyny as inevitable.” —

Advising Women Against Drinking Also Sends a Dangerous Method - Room for Debate - NYTimes.com

(via

brutereason

) ------------------------------------------------------------

“A false accusation of rape is, indeed, a fearsome prospect. But the likelihood of being falsely accused of rape are no different from that of being falsely accused of any other crime. And women are far more likely to be raped than men are to be falsely accused. The insistence on treating the two as equally prevalent issues is ….an entitlement.” —

5 ways sexual assault is really about entitlement - Salon.com

(via

brutereason

) --------------------------------------------------------------

“A woman from the audience asks: ‘Why were there so few women among the Beat writers?’ and [Gregory] Corso, suddenly utterly serious, leans forward and says: “There were women, they were there, I knew them, their families put them in institutions, they were given electric shock. In the ’50s if you were male you could be a rebel, but if you were female your families had you locked up.” —

Stephen Scobie, on the Naropa Institute’s 1994 tribute to Allen Ginsberg  (via thisisendless) Absences of women in history don’t “just happen,” they are made.

(via queereyes-queerminds)

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cunicular:

Your first time is NOT supposed to hurt

You are NOT supposed to bleed

If you bleed, that is NOT your hymen being ‘popped’, it is a tear due to lack of sexual arousal and natural lubrication.

This is all a MYTH perpetrated by men so they don’t have to make sure you are comfortable and sufficiently aroused enough before you have sex with them. It is an excuse to disregard and hurt you.

I just really want women to know this. --------------------------------------------------------

“When we talk about feminism we must also talk about race, because they are inextricably linked. What women of color go through is very different from what white women go through and you can’t ignore that when talking about feminism.” — April Householder (my feminist film professor)

------------------------------------------------------------ "Yes" doesn't always mean "yes" when you haven't created a situation in which your partner feels comfortable saying "no."

veeisagenderneutralname:

I feel like this should be obvious. But every time I see someone say “yes means yes; no means no” I cringe a little. Consent isn’t always that simple -----------------------------------------------------------

“[TW RAPE JOKES]

So here’s the real reason that rape jokes are troubled territory -

Because rape victims say so.

They get to say that. They get to feel that way. On this, they get to set the cultural rules.

It’s not about right or wrong, or logic versus emotion, or arguments of over sensitivity or hypocrisy - you have the free speech to make whatever jokes you want or talk about rape in whatever way you feel is illuminating. But they get to be upset about it. And call you on it. And be hurt by it.

But consider this:

You get to not be a rape victim.

They, however, are not afforded that luxury. Ever again.

” — Chuck Wendig (via

vickiexz

) --------------------------------------------------------

“And you tried to change, didn’t you? Closed your mouth more. Tried to be softer, prettier, less volatile, less awake… You can’t make homes out of human beings. Someone should have already told you that. And if he wants to leave, then let him leave. You are terrifying, and strange, and beautiful. Something not everyone knows how to love.” —

Warsan Shire, For Women Who Are Difficult To Love

(via

coyotegold

) ----------------------------------------------------------

“So if you want to be helpful, stop it. Stop it right now. Stop telling us we need to be less sensitive, or need to learn to take a joke. Stop explaining abusive behaviour to us. Stop implying feminists like being offended. Stop telling me you’d listen to women if we weren’t so angry.

Because I am angry and I’m sorry if anger makes you uncomfortable but for me, it’s a relief to realise after years and years of being quietly defeated, just how angry I now find I am. The anger reminds me that buried beneath the worthless, self-loathing teenager who whispers “it wasn’t rape,” whispers that I misunderstood, and that she will protect me by staying invisible, there’s another voice. That voice is tired of being told to shh. She knows it was rape. She always knew it.” —

An open letter to gaslighters on triggers, trauma, and women’s anger | The Fementalists

(via

brutereason

) ------------------------------------------------------

“Girls, adults are afraid of your sexuality. The moms who are teaching their boys that you’re nothing but a seductress if you dare go braless or post a selfie where your [gasp] shoulders are exposed are terrified. I’m not sure what makes them afraid. It’s possible that they think their sons will burn in eternal hell, that they’re worried you’ll knock on their door pregnant one day soon or something that’s less easy to identify. Just know that adult women who are concerned about teenage girls not wearing bras are fearful women. Know that women (and men) who are operating out of fear have no advice to give that’s of any value.” —

FYI: An Open Letter to Teenage Girls Who Don’t Always Wear a Bra | Jessica Gottlieb A Los Angeles Mom

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“The strong black woman is a complicated cultural myth. On one hand, she is a deeply empowering symbol of endurance and hope. Her unassailable spirit is uplifting. Her courage in the face of seemingly insurmountable adversity emboldens black men and women when facing their own life challenges. But in her perfection, the strong black woman is also harmful. Her titanic strength does violence to the spirits of black women when it becomes an imperative for their daily lives. When seeking help means showing unacceptable weakness, actual black women, unlike their mythical counterpart, face depression, anxiety, and loneliness. The strong black woman is not meant to be Pollyanna. Rather, she is expected to show negative emotion, but that emotion is anger, not sadness. The neck-rolling, finger-snapping, tooth- sucking demands of an angry black woman are entirely consistent with the myth of strength. But this no-nonsense, take-no-prisoners woman offers no expectation that the black woman is supposed to be happy, content, or fulfilled. Her sometimes explosive anger is part of what distinguishes her from the ideal of white femininity. This right to own and express anger is among the more potentially powerful psychological and political elements of the construction of black women’s strength. That the black woman is not denied an angry voice within an authentic definition of her femininity makes her a powerful ally for both black men and white women in their political struggles.” — Melissa Harris-Perry, Sister Citizen

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fuckingrapeculture:

iradescent:

Can You Tell The Difference Between A Men’s Magazine And A Rapist?

stfueverything:

Well, this is upsetting. According to a new study, people can’t tell the difference between quotes from British “lad mags” and interviews with convicted rapists. And given the choice, men are actually more likely to agree with the rapists. There’s a picture of an FHM cover at the link so that may not be safe for work.

-----------------------------------

“When you are hurting, there will always be people who find a way to make it about themselves. If you break your wrist, they’ll complain about a sprained ankle. If you are sad, they’re sadder. If you’re asking for help, they’ll demand more attention. Here is a fact: I was in a hospital and sobbing into my palms when a woman approached me and asked why I was making so much noise and I managed to stutter that my best friend shot himself in the head and now he was 100% certified dead and she made this little grunt and had the nerve to tell me, “Well now you made me sad.”

When you get angry, there are going to be people who ask you to shut up and sit down, and they’re not going to do it nicely. Theirs are the faces that turn bright red before you have a chance to finish your sentence. They won’t ask you to explain yourself. They’ll be mad that you’re mad and that will be their whole reason alone.

Here is a fact: I was in an alleyway a few weeks ago, stroking my friend’s back as she vomited fourteen tequila shots. “I hate men,” she wheezed as her sides heaved, “I hate all of them.”

I braided her hair so it wouldn’t get caught in the mess. I didn’t correct her and reply that she does in fact love her father and her little brother too, that there are strangers she has yet to meet that will be better for her than any of her shitty ex-boyfriends, that half of our group of friends identifies as male - I could hear each of her bruises in those words and I didn’t ask her to soften the blow when she was trying to buff them out of her skin. She doesn’t hate all men. She never did.

She had the misfortune to be overheard by a drunk guy in an ill-fitting suit, a boy trying to look like a man and leering down my dress as he stormed towards us. “Fuck you, lady,” he said, “Fuck you. Not all men are evil, you know.”

“Thanks,” I told him dryly, pulling on her hand, trying to get her inside again, “See you.”

He followed us. Wouldn’t stop shouting. How dare she get mad. How dare she was hurting. “It’s hard for me too!” he yowled after us. “With fuckers like you, how’s a guy supposed to live?”

Here’s a fact: my father is Cuban and my genes repeat his. Once one of my teachers looked at my heritage and said, “Your skin doesn’t look dirty enough to be a Mexican.”

When my cheeks grew pink and my tongue dried up, someone else in the classroom stood up. “You can’t say that,” he said, “That’s fucking racist. We could report you for that.”

Our teacher turned vicious. “You wanna fail this class? Go ahead. Report me. I was joking. It’s my word against yours. I hate kids like you. You think you’ve got all the power - you don’t. I do.”

Later that kid and I became close friends and we skipped class to do anything else and the two of us were lying on our backs staring up at the sky and as we talked about that moment, he sighed, “I hate white people.” His girlfriend is white and so is his mom. I reached out until my fingers were resting in the warmth of his palm.

He spoke up each time our teacher said something shitty. He failed the class. I stayed silent. I got the A but I wish that I didn’t.

Here is a fact: I think gender is a social construct and people that want to tell others what defines it just haven’t done their homework. I personally happen to have the luck of the draw and am the same gender as my sex, which basically just means society leaves me alone about this one particular thing.

Until I met Alex, who said he hated cis people. My throat closed up. I’m not good at confrontation. I avoided him because I didn’t want to bother him.

One day I was going on a walk and I found him behind our school, bleeding out of the side of his mouth. The only thing I really know is how to patch people up. He winced when the antibacterial cream went across his new wounds. “I hate cis people,” he said weakly.

I looked at him and pushed his hair back from his head. “I understand why you do.”

Here is a fact: anger is a secondary emotion. Anger is how people stop themselves from hurting. Anger is how people stop themselves by empathizing.

It is easy for the drunken man to be mad at my friend. If he says “Hey, fuck you, lady,” he doesn’t have to worry about what’s so wrong about men.

It’s easy for my teacher to fail the kids who speak up. If we’re just smart-ass students, it’s not his fault we fuck up.

It’s easy for me to hate Alex for labeling me as dangerous when I’ve never hurt someone a day in my life. But I’m safe in my skin and his life is at risk just by going to the bathroom. I understand why he says things like that. I finally do.

There’s a difference between the spread of hatred and the frustration of people who are hurting. The thing is, when you are broken, there will always be someone who says “I’m worse, stop talking.” There will always be people who are mad you’re trying to steal the attention. There will always be people who get mad at the same time as you do - they hate being challenged. It changes the rules.

I say I hate all Mondays but my sister was born on one and she’s the greatest joy I have ever known. I say I hate brown but it’s really just the word and how it turns your mouth down - the colour is my hair and my eyes and my favorite sweater. I say I hate pineapple but I still try it again every Easter, just to see if it stings less this year. It’s okay to be sad when you hear someone generalize a group you’re in. But instead of assuming they’re evil and filled with hatred, maybe ask them why they think that way - who knows, you might just end up with a new and kind friend.” — By telling the oppressed that their anger is unjustified, you allow the oppression to continue. I know it’s hard to stay calm. I know it’s scary. But you’re coming from the safe place and they aren’t. Just please … Try to be more understanding. /// r.i.d (via inkskinned)

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“What is interesting, is that the Frida Kahlo venerated by American feminists is a very different Frida Kahlo to the one people learn about in Mexico, in the Chicano community. In her country, she is recognized as an important artist and a key figure in revolutionary politics of early 20th century Mexico. Her communist affiliations are made very clear. Her relationship with Trotsky is underscored. All her political activities with Diego Rivera are constantly emphasized. The connection between her art and her politics is always made. When Chicana artists became interested in Frida Kahlo in the ‘70s and started organizing homages, they made the connection between her artistic project and theirs because they too were searching for an aesthetic compliment to a political view that was radical and emancipatory. But when the Euro-American feminists latch onto Frida Kahlo in the early ‘80s and when the American mainstream caught on to her, she was transformed into a figure of suffering. I am very critical of that form of appropriation.” — Coco Fusco (via plastickitten)

American feminists also rarely talk about her mode of dress as revolutionary in and of itself. It gets talked about as exotic and Mexican and unique, but in Mexico it’s always made very clear that she dressed the way she did as an expression of cultural pride that was not widely acceptable for her class and time. Her dress was revolutionary, anti-imperialist, and helped launch a resurgence of pride and awareness of Mexican culture that had been subjugated by centuries of imperialism.

(via pretended)

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resized:

youre-bey0nd-beautiful:

angrymuslimah:

“Gulabi Gang” is a gang of women in India who track down and beat abusive husbands with brooms. That’s not all they do - they’ve got more information on their website.

What else they do that is awesome:

Stop child marriages Persuade families to educate girl-child Train women in self-defense Oppose corruption in administration Create awareness about the evils of dowry Register FIRs against sex-offenders and abusive husbands Publicly shame molesters Encourage women to become financially independent

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I'm Not Like Other Girls. andthatlittleblackdress:

“I’m not like other girls, you know?” she tilts her head back and smiles strangely at me like she’s inviting me in on a little secret she’s been waiting to tell me “I’m different.”

When I ask her exactly what does she mean by that she shrugs rolling her shoulders up and down nonchalantly “just that - I’m just not like the rest. I’m smart. I actually eat I don’t wear make up - I’m just not like them.”

So you’re saying every other girl is stupid and every other girl never eats and every other girl wears make up every other girl is a mile high billboard six feet tall with photoshopped skin and a waist roughly the size of your ankle.

You see one of these girls in the mall and you turn your nose up at them sneering – how silly they are how stereotypical they are I’m not like them I’m better than them.

But in reality other girls don’t actually exist other girls is something told to us from the day we first learned that pink was our color and make up was our thing and our boyfriends are supposed to hold our purses and wait for us outside.

‘Other girls’ much like Snow White and much like Cinderella is a bed time story told to you every single second of every single day; you grew up learning to hate every other girl you grew up on the idea that what has been assigned to your gender - by a society and a media that wants to make money off of you - is something to be sneered at you grew up on the notion that pretty and thin are synonymous with stupid and vapid

But isn’t that they want us to be? Isn’t that what they’ve been telling us to be? Because if we’re not pretty and thin then we’re not worth anyone’s time but then if we are pretty and thin we’re turned into a joke.

A joke – like a 23 year old woman who’s been producing and writing her own music since she was sixteen years old being reduced to nothing more than the sum of her boyfriends a joke – like a 22 year old man who’s been producing and writing his own music since he was sixteen years old who is applauded and respected and even that boils down to other girls - other girls date your favorite boy band member other girls are pretty and thin other girls are ‘sluts.’

Other girls are the enemy pretty girls are the enemy because we’ve been taught that pretty girls get every thing so much easier but this is only true in the sense that they get the burdens that we all must face handed to them on a silver platter instead of on a wooden plank and is it so much better after all?

What is it that you hate so much about your own gender that compels you to separate yourself and claim yourself as above them? Don’t you see that when you divide us into ranks we create an enemy on the inside while the real enemy gets stronger?

--------------------------------------------

the fact that breast feeding in public is up for discussion

the fact that the sexualization of breasts has gotten to the point where it get’s in the way of it’s sole fucking purpose  

------------------------------------------------

“Yes, false rape accusations happen. Run the protocol anyway. I’ve heard that perhaps the military has the highest number of ‘em. True or not, RUN THE PROTOCOL ANYWAY. Because in 15 years of investigating rape accusations, I can count those that panned out as false on one hand. Meanwhile, the one time I almost skipped the protocol, the one time I almost didn’t believe a petty officer, because I was naive as an investigator and a young woman, because her commanding officer described her as “a party girl, always late, always out drinking, don’t bother with this one”, she turned out to be the victim of one of the most brutal assaults I’ve ever investigated. She shouldn’t have still been -alive-, let alone up and making the accusation. So let me repeat: five false accounts in fifteen years. And one time I almost failed a woman ‘cause of the bullshit way it’s normal to talk about us. Take your shipmates’ word, and then run the protocol. Every. Single. Time.”— JAG lawyer, speaking to my husband’s plant during Sexual Assault Prevention Month

----------------------------------------------------------

Women who served in Iraq were more likely to be raped by a fellow soldier than killed by enemy fire.

23-28% of women serving in the military will be sexually assaulted over the course of their service. And those numbers are rising.

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Too many young girls don’t know how to act when someone’s being inappropriate with them. They giggle or they try to brush it off. Don’t do that. Tell them to go fuck themselves - be a bitch. If someone’s being disrespectful to you, be disrespectful right back. Show them the same amount of respect that they show you.

---------------------------------------------------

“I raped that test in math cla–” No.

“I raped that game earli–” Stop.

“The other team totally raped us tod–” Shut the fuck up.

Do you see what you’re doing?

YOU ARE MAKING RAPE SOUND LIKE A POSITIVE ACTION.

YOU ARE EQUATING SEXUAL VIOLENCE WITH ACHIEVEMENT.

----------------------------

FOR DEFENSE OF RAPE JOKES:

To all those who don’t think the rape joke was a problem, or rape jokes are a problem.

I get it, you’re a decent guy. I can even believe it. You’ve never raped anybody. You would NEVER rape anybody. You’re upset that all these feminists are trying to accuse you of doing something or connect you to doing something that, as far as you’re concerned, you’ve never done and would never condone.

And they’ve told you about triggers, and PTSD, and how one in six women is a survivor, and you get it. You do. But you can’t let every time someone gets all upset get in the way of you having a good time, right?

So fine. If all those arguments aren’t going anything for you, let me tell you this. And I tell you this because I genuinely believe you mean it when you say you don’t want to hurt anybody, and you don’t see the harm, and that it’s important to you to do your best to be a decent and good person. And I genuinely believe you when you say you would never associate with a rapist and you think rape really is a very bad thing.

Because this is why I refuse to take rape jokes sitting down-

6% of college age men, slightly over 1 in 20, will admit to raping someone in anonymous surveys, as long as the word “rape” isn’t used in the description of the act.

6% of Penny Arcade’s target demographic will admit to actually being rapists when asked.

A lot of people accuse feminists of thinking that all men are rapists. That’s not true. But do you know who think all men are rapists?

Rapists do.

They really do. In psychological study, the profiling, the studies, it comes out again and again.

Virtually all rapists genuinely believe that all men rape, and other men just keep it hushed up better. And more, these people who really are rapists are constantly reaffirmed in their belief about the rest of mankind being rapists like them by things like rape jokes, that dismiss and normalize the idea of rape.

If one in twenty guys is a real and true rapist, and you have any amount of social activity with other guys like yourself, really cool guy, then it is almost a statistical certainty that one time hanging out with friends and their friends, playing Halo with a bunch of guys online, in a WoW guild, or elsewhere, you were talking to a rapist. Not your fault. You can’t tell a rapist apart any better than anyone else can. It’s not like they announce themselves.

But, here’s the thing. It’s very likely that in some of these interactions with these guys, at some point or another someone told a rape joke. You, decent guy that you are, understood that they didn’t mean it, and it was just a joke. And so you laughed.

And, decent guy who would never condone rape, who would step in and stop rape if he saw it, who understands that rape is awful and wrong and bad, when you laughed?

That rapist who was in the group with you, that rapist thought that you were on his side. That rapist knew that you were a rapist like him. And he felt validated, and he felt he was among his comrades.

You. The rapist’s comrade.

And if that doesn’t make you feel sick to your stomach, if that doesn’t make you want to throw up, if that doesn’t disturb you or bother you or make you feel like maybe you should at least consider not participating in that kind of humor anymore…

Well, maybe you aren’t as opposed to rapists as you claim.

----------------------------------------------------------

“Imagine you’re at a party. A guy offers you a drink. You say no. He says “Come on, one drink!” You say “no thanks.” Later, he brings you a soda. “I know you said you didn’t want a drink, but I was getting one for myself and you looked thirsty.” For you to refuse at this point makes you the asshole. He’s just being nice, right? Predators use the social contract and our own good hearts and fear of being rude against us. If you drink the drink, you’re teaching him that it just takes a little persistence on his part to overcome your “no.” If you say “Really, I appreciate it, but no thanks” and put the drink down and walk away from it, you’re the one who looks rude in that moment. But the fact is, you didn’t ask for the drink and you don’t want the drink and you don’t have to drink it just to make some guy feel validated.”

Why can’t you take no for an answer?” is one of the most powerful questions you can use in a social situation: suddenly, it’s your harasser’s manners on trial, not yours.

-----------------------------------------

“Gentlemen. This is what rape culture is like:

Imagine you have a Rolex watch. Nice fancy Rolex, you bought it because you like the way it looks and you wanted to treat yourself. And then you get beaten and mugged and your Rolex is stolen. So you go to the police. Only, instead of investigating the crime, the police want to know why you were wearing a Rolex instead of a regular watch. Have you ever given a Rolex to anyone else? Is it possible you wanted to be mugged? Why didn’t you wear long sleeves to cover up the Rolex if you didn’t want to be mugged?

And then after that, everywhere you go, there are constant jokes about stealing your Rolex. People you don’t even know whistle at your Rolex and make jokes about cutting your hand off to get it. The media doesn’t help either; it portrays people who wear Rolexes as flamboyant assholes who secretly just want someone to come along and take that Rolex off their hands. When damn, all you wanted was to wear a nice watch without getting harassed for it. When you complain that you are starting to feel unsafe, people laugh you off and say that you are too uptight. Never mind you got violently attacked for the crime of wearing a friggin time piece.

Imagining all that? It sucks, doesn’t it.

Now imagine you could never take the Rolex off.” —

The Wretched of the Earth: [TW: rape] On Rape Culture

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“The trouble is that, for women, being “nice” often translates into putting up with things we should never put up with. How many times has some creep sat uncomfortably close to me on the bus and stared me down, yet I’m too afraid to just get up and move, lest I offend him?

We smile when we’re harassed on the street or hit on by jerks. We laugh at sexist jokes. We learn that when we have strong opinions, we’ll be called bitches and that if we get angry, we’ll be called hysterical. When we say what we want, we’re called pushy or aggressive.

Part of learning “ladylike” behavior is about learning to smile politely when someone is being crude. Femininity has long been attached to passivity and to being docile. Men fight, women giggle and fume silently.” —

Women And Girls Don’t Need To Be Told To Be Nicer | xoJane

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“Don’t be too loud, too demanding, too nagging. You’ll scare boys away” or the dreaded “If he messes with you, its his way of showing you”. We equate harassment with attraction.

So you essentially leave male sexual autonomy with them, but female bodily autonomy is also men’s. We create a world where sex in its whole form is a man’s playing field, where male desires supercede. Where men get to be aggressive and chavinistic and they’re just victims to their male tendencies and should be synpathized with because “boys will be boys”.

-----------------------

next time you read about a man committing an atrocity against a child, count the seconds before someone says:

"but where was the child’s mother?"

"why didn’t the mother prevent this from happening?"

"honestly I think the mother deserves most of the blame here"

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because it would make more sense to unload a gun than to wear a bulletproof vest, but patriarchy exists ---------- I wonder how many rape victims have been told “I know you want it” and worked towards recovery only to have their rapist’s words spat back out at them over the radio in the form of a “sexy” pop song --------------------- “people ask, “Why did she go over that late?” and not “Why did he invite her over that late?” It asks “why didn’t she fight back?” and not “Why didn’t he stop?” It asks “Why did she drink so much?”, and not “Why did he give her doubles all night?” It asks “What has she done with boys in the past?”, and not “Why did he pick her?” It asks “Why didn’t she call the roommates for help?”, and not “Why would she want them to walk in to see her naked and being raped?” It asks “Why did she do nothing?” and not “How scary that must have been, being raped by a friend?”.” —

Sexual Assault in Mormon Patriarch

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“Feminists have always been accused of hating men because it is a very effective way of silencing a very threatening movement. In a society where women’s value is based on our ability to please men, and where men hold almost all the cards, the worst possible thing we can do is hate them. So when feminists point out and object to the oppression, abuse and discrimination perpetuated by men against women, this is framed as man hating in an attempt to silence us, in an attempt to ensure that we are vilified and ignored by the rest of society, so that male oppression of women and male privilege can continue unchecked.

No matter how we frame our arguments and no matter what kind of image we seek to project, as long as we highlight, object to and fight misogyny, feminists are going to be called man haters.

So I’m not going to waste my time trying to prove that I’m not.

— “Man haters?” by Laura on The F Word blog

-------------------

Why rape happens/why we have a rape culture:

1) The Myth of Fragile Masculinity.

From early boyhood, men are taught that their masculinity must be protected above all else, or else it will be lost. Men who have lost their masculinity are objects of contempt, derision and violent abuse, and have lost the right to be loved or respected by their fellow men and by their fathers.

Boys are also taught that masculinity is fragile and high-maintenance; you work to get it and to retain it, and the slightest slip can cause it to be altogether lost. You can slip instantly, with no transition, from the most popular boy in the room to the butt of everyone’s jokes: all it takes is a moment’s lapse in which you say or do anything that can be interpreted as feminine.

This is essential: Masculinity is fragile. The man who has lost his masculinity is, in the eyes of male culture, less than nothing, worse than dead. Therefore, force in defense of masculinity – like beating up a boy who accuses you of being a faggot – can feel to boys and men like a form of self-defense.

Masculinity is defined by what it is not. Being masculine means avoiding the feminine. Being feminine, even for an instant, means risking loss of masculinity. Empathy, in our culture’s warped conception, is feminine; thinking about other people’s emotions is feminine. Boys are taught to avoid empathy.

Masculinity is also defined by power-over. The man who is overpowered by others is less then a man; the man who has power over others is a man among men. Remember, masculinity is fragile: if you don’t have power-over someone, you’re in danger of losing your manhood.

Once boys become teens, masculinity is additionally defined by the absolutely crucial task of getting laid. Once again, masculinity is fragile: he who isn’t getting any isn’t a man.

Masculinity comes wrapped around a sense of entitlement. Men don’t feel grateful when the women in their life (mothers, wives, maids) prepare meals, make beds, or whatever: in our society’s warped view, the women are just doing what they’re supposed to, and men are just getting what they’re entitled to.

Statistically, environments which tend to have the most rape – middle and high school, frat houses, prisons – are also the environments which most emphasize masculinity, and where boys and men have the most reason to fear losing masculinity.

2) Low regard for women.

The fact is, women aren’t respected as equals, by and large. To some degree this is a self-perpetuating cycle: why aren’t women in more of public life’s highest-respected positions (Presidents, CEOs, Senators, etc.)? Because women aren’t seen as capable of holding society’s highest positions. Why aren’t women seen as being as capable? Well, just look around: there are almost no women are doing those things.

Women’s lower pay is both a cause of and a result of the low regard in which our culture holds women. That the huge amount of unpaid caretaking work our society requires to get by is overwhelmingly done by women, and accorded almost no respect (“stay at home moms just sit around watching TV all day, right?”), is both a cause of and a result of the low regard in which our culture holds women.

Women get paid less. Women get promoted less. Women get out of the house less. The work that women do is worth less.

Why do men rape women? It’s not because they hate women. Do hunters hunt because they hate animals? No, they hunt because hunting is fun, because they like the meat, and maybe because hunting is a way of male-bonding, They don’t hate the animal; they just consider empathy for the animal’s feelings irrelevant, less important than their desire for meat or fun.

This is why the “rape isn’t about sex, rape is about violence” analysis falls short. It’s not true and it denies the true horror of the situation. Rapists rape because they want sex; they don’t consider the woman’s feelings at all, because a woman’s feelings aren’t worth considering. They’re just women, after all.

3) Sexuality is something possessed by women, which is given to (or taken by) men.

That’s our society’s view of it. Look at the magazines on the racks – it’s pretty obvious why men’s magazines, wanting to sell copies with a sexy cover, usually use photos of mostly-undressed women. But why do women’s magazines do the exact same thing? Because to do a sexy magazine cover, you generally have to show a photo of a woman. Women are sexualized.

That’s also why women are taught to wait to be asked for a dance or a date, while men are taught to do the asking. Women have it; men ask for it.

This connects to the first point, too – the fragility of masculinity. Men who have lost their masculinity are, in our culture’s view, less than men, less even than women. They are the lowest of the low. One way to lose your masculinity is to be unable to “get” sex from a woman. This also breeds resentment of women (in much the same way that poverty can sometimes breed resentment of rich people): “how dare women not give something to me that I need so desperately? How dare women withhold from me the masculinity that I’m entitled to?”

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‎’Slut’ is attacking women for their right to say yes. ‘Friend Zone’ is attacking women for their right to say no.”

And “bitch” is attacking women for their right to call you on it.

---------------------------------

I am extremely, EXTREMELY tired of “real men have beards”/“real women have curves” posts and any variant of them.

You know what “real” people ought to have? Respect for other people regardless of gender identity/presentation, body type, and grooming choices.

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fun fact: dead rapists can’t become repeat offenders

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Don’t shame the girls who sent pictures of themselves half-naked to their significant others as a way to express eroticism which is healthy and natural…give the people hell who think it’s okay to destroy someone’s trust and distribute those images simply for entertainment purposes.

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"big strong boy" vs "cute little girl"

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“If you’re a “nice guy” to a girl up until you realize she doesn’t want to date you, then go on about how she’s a cold shrew that friendzoned you and how no girls date nice guys, like, nah mate, girls do date nice guys. You just aren’t a nice guy. You’re a passive aggressive beta with internalized misogyny and a serious victim complex.”

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“Does your boyfriend or brother spend a lot of money on skin and hair care products? Does your dad spend much time at the hairdresser or beautician?

In your city’s daily paper do most of the political news items feature women? Are most of the stories in the business section written by and about women? Is there a special ‘Men’s Section’ filled with celebrity gossip, fashion and beauty tips?

When you watch a big sporting event on TV, are the athletes usually women? When you watch female sporting teams are there hot guys in tiny outfits cheering for them on the sidelines?

Do girls you know talk openly about getting off while watching porn? Do they boast about their sexual conquests?

When you’re at the food court, do your female friends happily gobble down a large burger and fries combo while your male friends pick at a salad and sip diet coke?

Do the majority of the fathers you know spend most of their time at home washing, cleaning, cooking and taking care of their kids? Do you often hear mothers refer to looking after their own kids as ‘babysitting’? Have you heard women talk about earning brownie points for cleaning their own house and washing their own clothes? Are you sick of men going on about how hard it is to balance work and parenthood?

Are your male friends afraid to walk on their own at night? Do they avoid drinking too much in case they get raped? Do they dress to protect themselves from attack and always carry their keys poking through their knuckles? When they complain about all this do your female friends shrug and tell them that’s just how the world is?

If the answer to all of these questions was yes, wouldn’t that mean something was wrong? Is that still true if the genders are reversed? Does it matter?”

— Opening from Emily Maguire’s ‘Your Skirt’s Too Short: Sex, Power, Choice’

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“Labeling women as “crazy” is a way of controlling them. It may not be something planned or pre-meditated, but the ease with which men call women “crazy” says a lot about them. Calling a woman “crazy” is quick and easy shut-down to any discussion. Once the “crazy” card has been pulled out, women are now put on the defensive: the onus is no longer on the man to address her concerns or her issue, it’s on her to justify her behavior, to prove that she is not, in fact, crazy or irrational. Men don’t even have to provide any sort of argument back – it’s a classic catch-22; “the fact that you don’t even see that you’re acting crazy is just proof that it’s crazy.””

On Labeling Women “Crazy” | Paging Dr. NerdLove - Part 2

See also: “You’re overreacting.”

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Nothing pisses me off more than a guy who has no respect for women but suddenly becomes the overprotective father or brother when they share the same last names. -

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“When women scream you wonder what’s wrong with them. When men yell you get afraid about what they’re going to do.”

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“…If your first concern on reading about hundreds of self-reported attempted and completed rapes is whether the research supports the proposition that most men are in the clear…you need to get your head screwed on straight. Women worrying that you might be a rapist is not a bigger problem than women getting raped.” —Lyndsay, in a comment on “

Meet the Predators

"  ----------------------------------------------------- “

What if all women were bigger and stronger than you and thought they were smarter

What if women were the ones who started wars

What if too many of your friends had been raped by women wielding giant dildos and no K-Y Jelly

What if the state trooper who pulled you over on the New Jersey Turnpike was a woman and carried a gun

What if the ability to menstruate was the prerequisite for most high-paying jobs

What if your attractiveness to women depended on the size of your penis

What if every time women saw you they’d hoot and make jerking motions with their hands

What if women were always making jokes about how ugly penises are and how bad sperm tastes

What if you had to explain what’s wrong with your car to big sweaty women with greasy hands who stared at your crotch in a garage where you are surrounded by posters of naked men with hard-ons

What if men’s magazines featured cover photos of 14-year-old boys with socks tucked into the front of their jeans and articles like: “How to tell if your wife is unfaithful” or “What your doctor won’t tell you about your prostate” or “The truth about impotence”

What if the doctor who examined your prostate was a woman and called you “Honey”

What if you had to inhale your boss’s stale cigar breath as she insisted that sleeping with her was part of the job

What if you couldn’t get away because the company dress code required you wear shoes designed to keep you from running

And what if after all that women still wanted you to love them.

For the Men Who Still Don’t Get It, written 20 years ago by Carol Diehl. -------------------------------------------------

women are considered fragile but I’ve never seen anything as easily wounded as a man’s ego

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You know why women often say “nothing’s wrong” when something is definitely bothering them

It’s because men have been belittling, minimizing and mocking our emotions forever

And we are socialized to be as passive and undemanding and selfless as possible, and not to run any risk of bothering or angering a man lest he abandon or hurt us It’s not passive aggression, it is fear

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Some scary controlling people will tell you over and over how important consent is to them. They will tell you that they want to respect your boundaries, and that if anything makes you uncomfortable, they will stop. They will say this over and over, apparently sincerely.

Until you actually say no.

And then, suddenly, they create a reason that it wasn’t ok, after all, and that you’re going to do what they wanted anyway.

They will tell you that it *would* be ok to say no, and that of course they’d respect it, but you said it wrong. And that you have to understand that it hurts them when you say it that way. (And that you should make it better by doing what they wanted).

Or they will tell you that of course they don’t want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable, but you said yes before. And that this means that either it’s really ok with you, or that you don’t trust them anymore. And that you have to understand that it hurts when you withdraw trust like that (and that you should make it better by doing what they wanted.)

Or that they have a headache. Or that they just can’t deal with it right now. That maybe when they feel better or aren’t tired or grumpy or had a better day it will be ok to say no. (And that meanwhile, you should fix things by doing what they wanted).

Or that by saying no, you’re accusing them of being an awful person. And that they’d never do anything to hurt you, so why are you making accusations like that? (And, implicitly, that you should fix it by doing what they wanted.)

If this kind of thing happens every time you say no, things are really wrong.

No isn’t a theoretical construct. In mutually respectful relationships, people say no to each other often, and it’s not a big deal.

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See, what you need to understand is that “Not all guys like that” is never going to work. Because you’re answering an entirely different conversation than what women are actually saying.

You think women are saying “Every man is a predator and a danger to me.” And you’re replying, “But I’m not like that.”

But women aren’t saying that. They’re saying “There are too many situations where women have to worry about their safety,” and you’re saying “That’s not important.” They’re saying “Women are constantly told it’s their fault if something bad happens,” and you’re saying “Don’t worry about it.” They’re saying “Too often, women find their trust violated by men,” and you’re saying “But you should trust me!”

They’re saying “So many men have decided that what they want is more important than anything about a woman.” And you’re replying “I’m exactly like that.”

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“Princeton University psychologist Susan Fiske took brain scans of heterosexual men while they looked at sexualised images of women wearing bikinis. She found that the part of their brains that became activated was pre-motor - areas that usually light up when people anticipate using tools. The men were reacting to the images as if the women were objects they were going to act on. Particularly shocking was the discovery that the participants who scored highest on tests of hostile sexism were those most likely to deactivate the part of the brain that considers other people’s intentions (the medial prefrontal cortex) while looking at the pictures. These men were responding to images of the women as if they were non-human.” — The Equality Illusion  

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“As a Muslim feminist woman of color, I cannot relate to Slutwalks as it caters mostly to the definition of emancipation set by white women. Slutwalks deviate in terms of delivering the message against sexual assault. It turns a blind eye to women of cultures where flimsy clothes don’t necessarily lead to rapes. Muslim women get raped too. Nassim Elbardouh is right. “Do Not Rape” Walk sounds better. This isn’t to say that I don’t support Slutwalks. I simply can’t relate to a liberating movement that does not liberate nor acknowledge me. Western feminism, despite its undeniable achievements, still perpetuates the image of a white woman as the liberated one. If these feminists do claim to represent all women, they need to understand the dynamics of the cultures other women hail from. Don’t care if you’re wearing a thong or burka, no one has the right to rape you. Burka clad brown Muslim women get raped too. Represent us. I want a movement that represents me regardless of my color and creed. End victim blaming and rape culture by representing everyone.” —

Mehreen Kasana

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Why is it men always want to turn the extra room into a man-cave?

Screw you I’m turning that room into a lady cave. I’m going to go in there and read romance novels, crochet, preform witchcraft, scrap book, pet a cat, worship satan, and complain to my friends that you’re not satisfying me sexually. You can go fuck yourself.

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“Objectification is the opposite of empathy. While we talk about its effects on girls, the way it erodes their confidence, their self-awareness, their sense of security, we rarely actually discuss what the effects of sexually objectifying women are on boys and their psychological or sexual development. It’s not minor. It encourages them to think of girls and women as body parts for pleasure and use — literally, as “things” that don’t have autonomy or self-determination and whose permission is irrelevant. Things that are fungible and are violable. Things that should be silent.” — Soraya Chemaly,

Why naked pictures aren’t harmless

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The problem is not that our society has taught girls to not feel beautiful; the problem is that we’ve taught them that this means they’re not worth loving, not worth being, that they are somehow lesser because of it.

Let me tell you, despite what magazines and makeup companies and fashion moguls would have you believe, there is NO - I repeat - there is NO woman in the world whom everyone agrees is beautiful. Not a single one.

That would be impossible, not only because ‘beauty’ means different things to different cultures (did you know some cultures like their women fat as a general concept of beauty?), but because each PERSON is different. Women all like different things - tall, short, lanky, bulky, hairy, waxed… why do we assume males only go for one archetype? Because it’s been constructed for us as the ONE GOLDEN IMAGE OF BEAUTY to strive for (and even achieve, if we just buy ENOUGH of the RIGHT products - how convenient).

The reality is, no matter what you look like, *there will always be people who think you’re ugly* (ask Megan Fox, Angelina Jolie, etc.). So the issue is not that females in our society feel ugly - they ARE, to someone. I guarantee, no matter WHAT you look like, there will be people in the world who think you look like a cow. And - what’s more - no one ever made history just for being beautiful, no matter how good-looking they were (ok, Helen of Troy, but she was fictional, and she was also the daughter of a God, so good luck), so why are we so enthralled by the idea of being beautiful?

Instead of worrying about why we as a society make girls feel ugly, maybe we should worry about why our society thinks that being ugly MATTERS SO MUCH.

— @CallMeCalliope

--------------------------------------------------- “Girls and women of the world, could we stop apologizing for wanting and eating food? Because this is one of the most ridiculous things that we do collectively as lady-people, and not only does it annoy the shit out of me personally, but it is also INCREDIBLY SAD. Could we stop feeling “guilty” for wanting an effing brownie? Or a plate of fries? Could we stop actively seeking permission from our friends to go ahead and “be bad” and order the cheesecake? Could we all just go ahead and order whatever it is that we feel like eating, instead of saying, “Oh, I feel like a pig, you guys are just getting salads”?

Because—now I know this will come as a shock—WOMEN EAT. We get hungry. We get hungry for pizzas and Double Stuf Oreos and nachos and ice cream and giant French-toast breakfasts, and you know what? WE DON’T NEED TO FEEL BAD ABOUT THAT.

” — an excerpt from this beautiful article that everyone should read (x)

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History is not a long series of centuries in which men did all the interesting/important things and women stayed home and twiddled their thumbs in between pushing out babies, making soup and dying in childbirth.

History is actually a long series of centuries of men writing down what they thought was important and interesting, and FORGETTING TO WRITE ABOUT WOMEN. It’s also a long series of centuries of women’s work and women’s writing being actively denigrated by men. Writings were destroyed, contributions were downplayed, and women were actively oppressed against, absolutely.

But the forgetting part is vitally important. Most historians and other writers of what we now consider “primary sources” simply didn’t think about women and their contribution to society. They took it for granted, except when that contribution or its lack directly affected men.

This does not in any way mean that the female contribution to society was in fact less interesting or important, or complicated, simply that history—the process of writing down and preserving of the facts, not the facts/events themselves—was looking the other way.

” — Tansy Rayner Roberts

---------------------------------------------------- “Here’s the thing. Men in our culture have been socialized to believe that their opinions on women’s appearance matter a lot. Not all men buy into this, of course, but many do. Some seem incapable of entertaining the notion that not everything women do with their appearance is for men to look at. This is why men’s response to women discussing stifling beauty norms is so often something like “But I actually like small boobs!” and “But I actually like my women on the heavier side, if you know what I mean!” They don’t realize that their individual opinion on women’s appearance doesn’t matter in this context, and that while it might be reassuring for some women to know that there are indeed men who find them fuckable, that’s not the point of the discussion.

Women, too, have been socialized to believe that the ultimate arbiters of their appearance are men, that anything they do with their appearance is or should be “for men.” That’s why women’s magazines trip over themselves to offer up advice on “what he wants to see you wearing” and “what men think of these current fashion trends” and “wow him with these new hairstyles.” While women can and do judge each other’s appearance harshly, many of us grew up being told by mothers, sisters, and female strangers that we’ll never “get a man” or “keep a man” unless we do X or lose some fat from Y, unless we moisturize//trim/shave/push up/hide/show/”flatter”/paint/dye/exfoliate/pierce/surgically alter this or that.

That’s also why when a woman wears revealing clothes, it’s okay, in our society, to assume that she’s “looking for attention” or that she’s a slut and wants to sleep with a bunch of guys. Because why else would a woman wear revealing clothes if not for the benefit of men and to communicate her sexual availability to them, right? It can’t possibly have anything to do with the fact that it’s hot out or it’s more comfortable or she likes how she looks in it or everything else is in the laundry or she wants to get a tan or maybe she likes women and wants attention from them, not from men?

The result of all this is that many men, even kind and well-meaning men, believe, however subconsciously, that women’s bodies are for them. They are for them to look at, for them to pass judgment on, for them to bless with a compliment if they deign to do so. They are not for women to enjoy, take pride in, love, accept, explore, show off, or hide as they please. They are for men and their pleasure.” —

Why You Shouldn’t Tell That Random Girl On The Street That She’s Hot » Brute Reason

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things girls are made to feel ashamed of-

having periods choosing what they want to wear on their body wanting to/not wanting to have sex putting boys in the ‘friendzone’ standing up against misogyny ruining a boy’s life by telling the police that he raped her i could go on ----------------------------------------------------- “I will teach my daughter not to wear her skin like a drunken apology. I will tell her ‘make a home out of your body, live in yourself, do not let people turn you into a regret, do not justify yourself. If you are a disaster it is not forever, if you are a disaster you are the most beautiful one I’ve ever seen. Do not deconstruct from the inside out, you belong here, you belong here, not because you are lovely, but because you are more than that.’” — Azra T. “Your hands are threads, your body is a canvas” (via

thatkindofwoman

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Remember that intimate conversation you had with your son? The one where you said, “I love you and I need you to know that no matter how a woman dresses or acts, it is not an invitation to cat call, taunt, harass or assault her”?

Or when you told your son, “A woman’s virginity isn’t a prize and sleeping with a woman doesn’t earn you a point”?

How about the heart-to-heart where you lovingly conferred the legal knowledge that “a woman doesn’t have to be fighting you and you don’t have to be pinning her down for it to be RAPE. Intoxication means she can’t legally consent, NOT that she’s an easy score.”

Or maybe you recall sharing my personal favorite, “Your sexual experiences don’t dictate your worth just like a woman’s sexual experiences don’t dictate hers.”

Last but not least, do you remember calling your son out when you discovered he was using the word “slut” liberally? Or when you overheard him talking about some girl from school as if she were more of a conquest than a person?

I want you to consider these conversations and then ask yourself why you don’t remember them. The likely reason is because you didn’t have them. In fact, most parents haven’t had them.

” —The Conversation You Must Have With Your Sons | Carina Kolodny

-------------------------------------------------- “How is a woman supposed to win? If she primps, she’s capitulating to the patriarchy and not celebrating her true self. If she goes natural, she’s an ugly hag. If she sometimes wants to add a cool filter to her picture, she’s lying about how she looks and who she is: even though Instagram as a service was designed with the filters as its core, and they’re a huge part of how Instagram works and how the feeds are presented. This idea that women now need to exhibit perfection with a #nofilter tag is just as pointlessly oppressive as insisting that women get made up just to walk down the driveway to the mailbox.

Sharing photographs is supposed to be fun, not a constant battle with yourself and the people around you. When people have to stress out about the judgmental comments they’ll get on their selfies, it doesn’t really create an incentive for them to post them, and it definitely undermines their sense of worth and pride in themselves. Taking selfies can be incredibly empowering, but not when it’s emotionally fraught.” — Must Women Always Be Perfect? | this ain’t livin’

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the stereotype that women talk more than men is infinitely amusing to me because men are literally incapable of shutting the fuck up i hope this post gets popular enough that i hurt a man’s feelings

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“These girls. I remember them. They happened. They were there with me. They had red hair and bright red lipstick and they wore Boston Red Sox hoodies and they loved Russian literature and they had big, wily pet dogs and they spent the night.

I talked to them at parties or met them in the dorms freshman year or they were friends of friends who stroked my hair and said, “I just think everyone’s a little bit bisexual, don’t you?”

I loved them. They were real and they shared themselves with me and we spent time together at thrift shops and in classes and at bars and at friends’ dinner parties. We held hands while other couples passed around a joint. We buried our faces in each other’s soft necks under the covers. These were relationships. These were people I was with.

“I want us to be monogamous,” men say. “But you know, obviously girls don’t count.”” —Girls Don’t Count | Thought Catalog

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Characteristics of male power include the power of men:

1. to deny women [our own] sexuality

[by means of clitoridectomy and infibulation; chastity belts; punishment, including death, for female adultery; punishment, including death, for lesbian sexuality; psychoanalytic denial of the clitoris; strictures against masturbation; denial of material and postmenopausal sensuality; unnecessary hysterectomy; pseudolesbian images in media and literature; closing of archives and destruction of documents relating to lesbian existence];

2. or to force it [male sexuality] upon them

by means of rape (including marital rape) and wife beating; father-daughter, brother-sister incest; the socialization of women to feel that male sexual “drive” amounts to a right,(15) idealization of heterosexual romance in art, literature, media, advertising, and so forth; child marriage; arranged marriage; prostitution; the harem; psychoanalytic doctrines of frigidity and vaginal orgasm; pornographic depictions of women responding pleasurably to sexual violence and humiliation (a subliminal message being that sadistic heterosexuality is more “normal” than sensuality between women)];

3. to command or exploit their labor to control their produce

[by means of the institutions of marriage and motherhood as unpaid production; the horizontal segregation of women in paid employment; the decoy of the upwardly mobile token woman; male control of abortion, contraception, and childbirth; enforced sterilization; pimping, female infanticide, which robs mothers of daughters and contributes to generalized devaluation of women];

4. to control or rob them of their children

[by means of father-right and “legal kidnapping”;(16) enforced sterilization; systematized infanticide; seizure of children from lesbian mothers by the courts, the malpractice of male obstetrics; use of the mother as “token torturer”(17) in genital mutilation or in binding the daughter’s feet (or mind) to fit her for marriage];

5. to confine them physically and prevent their movement

[by means of rape as terrorism, keeping women off the streets; purdah, foot-binding; atrophying of women’s athletic capabilities; haute couture, “feminine” dress codes; the veil; sexual harassment on the streets, horizontal segregation of women in employment; prescriptions for “full-time” mothering; enforced economic dependence of wives];

6. to use them as objects in male transactions

[use of women as “gifts,” bride-price; pimping; arranged marriage; use of women as entertainers to facilitate male deals, for example, wife-hostess, cocktail waitress required to dress for male sexual titillation, call girls, “bunnies,” geisha, kisaeng prostitutes, secretaries];

7. to cramp their creativeness

[witch persecutions as campaigns against midwives and female healers and as pogrom against independent, “unassimilated” women;(18) definition of male pursuits as more valuable than female within any culture, so that cultural values become embodiment of male subjectivity, restriction of female self-fulfillment to marriage and motherhood, sexual exploitation of women by male artists and teachers; the social and economic disruption of women’s creative aspirations;(19) erasure of female tradition];(20) and

8. to withhold from them large areas of the society’s knowledge and cultural attainments

[by means of noneducation of females (60 percent of the world’s illiterates are women~; the “Great Silence” regarding women and particularly lesbian existence in history and culture;(21) sex-role stereotyping that deflects women from science, technology, and other “masculine” pursuits; male social/professional bonding that excludes women; discrimination against women in the professions]

Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence Adrienne Rich

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Male journalists, who are undoubtedly in the majority when it comes to rock journalism, are quite simply sick to the back teeth with women banging on about something men really don’t prioritize. Effectively (in conjunction with the managing editors and publishers of the music press—most of whom are male) they control which topics are covered, which bands are featured and how a magazine’s overall journalistic style is determined. Most editorial positions are taken up by men, as are most freelance positions, and despite half-hearted claims by certain editors about redressing the balance on their papers and magazines, women continue to find themselves marginalized.

No doubt this is why male journalists feel they can afford to declare the gender issue dead and buried. For them, it isn’t really an issue. It merely challenges their authority in a world where they know what’s what and who’s calling the shots. Even in this supposedly enlightened, post-feminist age, men still feel profoundly threatened by women.

” —Girls Will Be Boys: Women Report on Rock, Liz Evans

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“Women are sick of being typecast, stereotyped, and pigeonholed. They are not sick of being women.” —Girls Will Be Boys: Women Report on Rock, Liz Evans

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You are not a bad person for getting abortion, it doesn’t matter if:

you were assaulted your birth control failed you weren’t on birth control at all there is a medical issue you don’t want children you already have children and can’t handle another you aren’t ready you don’t want to be pregnant You are never a bad person for needing an abortion. There is nothing wrong with you. Don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise.

You are not alone.

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kaninchenzero:

"he deserves the presumption of innocence"

fuck that. this is not court, social opprobrium is not equivalent to the armed might of the state.

the only way to ensure every person accused of sexual violence is presumed to be innocent in every circumstance is to assume that every victim is always lying.

presuming the accused to be innocent is setting the standard for prosecution in criminal courts. the people deciding the case must begin by assuming the accused is innocent.

ONLY THE PEOPLE DECIDING THE OUTCOME OF THE CRIMINAL CASE MUST PRESUME THE ACCUSED IS INNOCENT BEFORE TRIAL BEGINS.

no one else.

we cannot apply the rules of criminal courts to every human interaction. they are designed to have artificially high standards because the state has an enormous amount of power over nearly everyone.

a victim of sexual violence does not have that kind of power over their assailant. victims of sexual violence only very rarely can invoke the armed might of the state on their behalf and risk further violence and humiliation if they do.

to move towards any kind of justice we — those of us who are not involved in criminal proceedings — must presume an assault has taken place and the victim can reliably identify their assailant.

otherwise we maintain the status quo where perpetrators of sexual violence can act in the near certainty they will never be even mildly inconvenienced for their sins. ------------------------------------------------------------ “

Does your boyfriend or brother spend a lot of money on skin and hair care products? Does your dad spend much time at the hairdresser or beautician?

In your city’s daily paper do most of the political news items feature women? Are most of the stories in the business section written by and about women? Is there a special ‘Men’s Section’ filled with celebrity gossip, fashion and beauty tips?

When you watch a big sporting event on TV, are the athletes usually women? When you watch female sporting teams are there hot guys in tiny outfits cheering for them on the sidelines?

Do girls you know talk openly about getting off while watching porn? Do they boast about their sexual conquests?

When you’re at the food court, do your female friends happily gobble down a large burger and fries combo while your male friends pick at a salad and sip diet coke?

Do the majority of the fathers you know spend most of their time at home washing, cleaning, cooking and taking care of their kids? Do you often hear mothers refer to looking after their own kids as ‘babysitting’? Have you heard women talk about earning brownie points for cleaning their own house and washing their own clothes? Are you sick of men going on about how hard it is to balance work and parenthood?

Are your male friends afraid to walk on their own at night? Do they avoid drinking too much in case they get raped? Do they dress to protect themselves from attack and always carry their keys poking through their knuckles? When they complain about all this do your female friends shrug and tell them that’s just how the world is?

If the answer to all of these questions was yes, wouldn’t that mean something was wrong? Is that still true if the genders are reversed? Does it matter?

” — Opening from Emily Maguire’s ‘Your Skirt’s Too Short: Sex, Power, Choice’  

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“Don’t marry a man unless you would be proud to have a son exactly like him.”

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Reminder: You are under no obligation to look pretty.  

fandomsandfeminism:

Not when you are laying around the house, not when you go to the grocery store, not when you sit in a classroom, not when you go to the gym. You are never obligated to get dressed up just so you are pretty for others.

Pretty is not the rent you pay to exist in the world as a woman. ----------------------------------------------------------

“The reason women are turning you down for casual sex seems to be that, for one thing, a lot of you are calling them sluts afterward. Also, a lot of you aren’t bothering to try to be good in bed.” — Terri Conley, professor of psychology and women’s studies at the University of Michigan (link

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Why is it not helpful to say “not all men are like that”? For lots of reasons. For one, women know this. They already know not every man is a rapist, or a murderer, or violent. They don’t need you to tell them.

Second, it’s defensive. When people are defensive, they aren’t listening to the other person; they’re busy thinking of ways to defend themselves. I watched this happen on Twitter, over and again.

Third, the people saying it aren’t furthering the conversation, they’re sidetracking it. The discussion isn’t about the men who aren’t a problem. (Though, I’ll note, it can be. I’ll get back to that.) Instead of being defensive and distracting from the topic at hand, try staying quiet for a while and actually listening to what the thousands upon thousands of women discussing this are saying.

Fourth—and this is important, so listen carefully—when a woman is walking down the street, or on a blind date, or, yes, in an elevator alone, she doesn’t know which group you’re in. You might be the potential best guy ever in the history of history, but there’s no way for her to know that. A fraction of men out there are most definitely not in that group. Which are you? Inside your head you know, but outside your head it’s impossible to.

This is the reality women deal with all the time.

” — #NotAllMen: How Not to Derail Discussions of Women’s Issues

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“You think I’m not a goddess?

Try me.

This is a torch song.

Touch me and you’ll burn.” — Margaret Atwood, from “Helen of Troy Does Countertop Dancing”

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“Once discovered he sought to justify and minimise the situation by one-sided arguments that ranged from - “it’s just guys’ stuff, a bit of fun, all guys look at porn, hey, get real - it’s the way the world is now.” The implication being that I was a prude, over-reacting and out of date. “It was just ‘fantasy’”, he said, and therefore not related to the real sex that we shared. My reply: “it’s obvious fakery for the women - you can see that” was met with “no, no, you have that wrong, they are genuinely enjoying it.” He knew. So it wasn’t fantasy then? I was supposed to believe it was just a mild diversion, when for the women it had to be real. Any suggestion though of the reality that women were coerced or treated badly was dismissed. They were fine, they were well paid. Self-delusional and ambiguous arguments ran amok. He seemed to have gone to a different place; to comment about the women in porn and me in a cold and detached way, to say things about women’s bodies, about sexual acts which came out of his mouth with swingeing bluntness. A layer of empathy had been ground away.” — Caroline (pseudonym) 2012 “The Impact of Pornography on my Life” in Bray, A. and Tankard Reist, M. (eds)

Big Porn Inc: Exposing the Harms of the Global Porn Industry

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“So, I ask to the women who are still not sure about rape culture, patriarchy, or male supremacy, if you see the problem behind a culture in which “no” is punishable, but where failure to say “no” makes any violation of your personhood your own fault. When you sit back for a moment and think to yourself that surely you can say no to men, and that I am blowing things way out of proportion, then at least do this test within your own life: Start saying No more often when No is what you really want to say. Establish firm boundaries with men and do not let up. See if the male you are saying no to immediately stops and respects your boundary, or if his automatic response, reflexive—as though he’s been learning how to do this since he was a boy, as though he sees no other response more logical than this—is to attempt to do what you have just asked him not to do to you. Notice how you feel when telling a man “no” as well. Do you feel butterflies in your stomach? Do you feel guilty (denying him his right of access to you)? Do you feel mean? Do you feel unsure at all as to whether or not you have the right to tell him no? It is very easy to feel that men are not so bad when you are still making sure to give them what they want.” — Looking Male Supremacists Dead in Their Dead Eyes (The Boner Busters Takedown)

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“This is hard to explain. Girls … " He trailed off, frowning in thought and rubbing at the bridge of his nose, then started over. "Boys insult each other by calling each other ‘nancy’ or ‘queer’ or ‘poofter’, and those things are insulting because they suggest you want to be a girl — and being a girl is bad, right? That’s the implication. If someone loses or gets tricked, they’re ‘fucked’. Girls get fucked, and boys do the fucking. Boys come out on top, and being on the bottom is weak. Bad. Girly. It says something rather awful about what we really think of girls, doesn’t it? God forbid any boy should give up his boy-ness to be a girl.” — Excerpt From: Minisinoo. “Aorist Subjunctive 04 - Past Present.” [x] (via hoodiecap)

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toebesity asked: I've asked before and maybe you didn't see it, or if you think this is repetitive/a stupid question, please tell me so I won't add to your inbox. I understand that marriage is a patriarchal institution and partaking in hetero marriage especially is not a feminist act, but is it an anti-feminist act? Also, do you have any suggestions for further reading about feminist perspectives of heterosexuality? I can't find many myself (maybe I'm just not looking in the right places?). Thank you!

evilfeminist answered: The following was written by feminist Michele Braa-Heidner.:

If heterosexuality was expressed in a non patriarchal, male dominated scenario, heterosexuality may have merit, but as it stands, existing within the confines of patriarchy, we must question it completely. Why do women want to be with men knowing what we know about men? Knowing that all men disrespect and hate women most of the time? Seeing the devastating results of male violence against women historically and currently? Seeing men dominate, oppress, violate and murder women? We must ask ourselves is our heterosexuality healthy or is it an adapted survival behavior in response to male violence against females? Since we don’t have any frame of reference for healthy heterosexuality where women and men are both respected free and equal human beings, we cannot say with any conviction that patriarchal heterosexuality is normal, healthy or natural. Since we don’t have any frame of reference of a type of heterosexuality that exists without the component of male violence against women, we cannot come to the conclusion that patriarchal heterosexuality is normal, healthy or natural.

When women against all logic and evidence, continue to have relationships with men, regardless of how they treat us, we must conclude that there is another mechanism in play here. When we begin to question heterosexuality, I mean really question it and dismantle it within the patriarchal confines, we expose the insanity of women “choosing” to be with men on male merit alone because the hard truth of the matter is that men don’t deserve women on merit alone. Consequently, this insane need for women to be with men begins to reveal itself as a symptom or reaction to the conditions of female enslavement and victimization. A means for surviving male violence. This becomes even more evident when you read the symptoms of oppressive/dominant relationships and how the behaviors of subservience are exactly the same behaviors as femininity. That even men display “feminine” behaviors when they are being dominated. What if women have adapted to male domination and violence by “sleeping with the enemy”? By getting close to their captors in an effort to be able to control their environment or to curtail male violence? We need to start asking ourselves these questions so that we can begin to analyze our relationships with men if we ever want to have healthy ones or further, decide not to.

If we do this, analyze our desire to be with men, we may find that there is no good reason. That our relationships are not based on reciprocal respect, but instead based on our own terror. Our individual man could be to us, a life preserver amongst a sea of potential male predators. We may find that on the surface we kid ourselves into believing that we need them or want them but underneath this surface level, we see that this is just a band-aide covering up our terror from the inherent memory, cell memory, of our violent enslavement at the hands of men. There is ample evidence that connects feminine behaviors especially in our relationships with men that mimic the behaviors of victims of Stockholm’s Syndrome.

Another factor involved here is that most male violence against women including rape is done by the men that women know or have relationships with, not by strangers. The nuclear family is the playground for male violence due to the isolation of women under the roof and control of individual men. We are constantly inundated with threats of violence from male strangers, but the truth is this compared to non stranger male violence is rare. I believe the reason for this that patriarchy has a stake in keeping women terrified of the strange man out there, outside our safe homes, because this terror keeps women in their place, within the confines of the nuclear family, the individual man and of patriarchy on a societal level. Women then cling to their “men” in an effort to stay safe from the strange violent males–out there. Women stay in abusive relationships because they have Stockholm’s syndrome, not because they are stupid or because they like it. She is merely trying to survive violence in the best way she knows how.

Women learn to see themselves as inferior and men superior because they must put themselves in their captors shoes to be able to feel safer to be able to figure out when an if he will be violent and try to curtail his violence. This is why women tend to dislike themselves and other women because they are seeing themselves through the dominant male eyes. Women then see themselves and other women as weak, stupid, petty and deserving of male punishment, yet another reason why women tend to like men over women. And this is also why women tend to compete with other women when it comes to male attention. Patriarchy teaches women this lie, that men are important and women are not; therefore, to be important, women must be with men thereby getting attention or importance through osmosis. All of these factors play into what we know as “heterosexuality” and all of these factors also play into the reasons for why we think heterosexuality is necessary. If we take these factors and or reasons out of the equation, would we be heterosexual? Would women want to be with men?

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I care about the problems of men. I care that the patriarchy tells men that they have to be stoic beasts incapable of emotion. I care that the patriarchy tells men that they are lust-filled monsters incapable of controlling their own libidos. I care that the patriarchy tells men that they cannot be raped or assaulted because the patriarchy believes women are too weak and inferior to be dangerous.

Feminists did not do this to you, other men did.

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“Stop apologizing to men for not wanting to sit with them, drink with them, dance with them, go home with them. You have not been put on this earth for their pleasure, their entertainment, to help them feel a little less lonely at night. If you do not want someone, are not interested in someone, don’t apologize. You do not have to be forgiven for the sake of someone else’s feelings. All you have to worry about is your own.

If you’re dating someone and they cheat on you with the girl sitting across them from the bar, or anyone for that matter, do not ask their name, why they did it, and if it was worth it. Just leave. Do not swear your revenge, or that you find the one who broke your relationship because the person who broke your trust is sitting right in front of you. The person who ruined what you had is the one who promised that they never would. Do not fixate yourself on what you should have or could have done, but what you will do, which is leave. You gave them a chance and now they can see it walk out the door.

You’re going to make mistakes and that’s inevitable, but what isn’t is making those same mistakes twice. You are supposed to learn from the pain, supposed to take it into your hands, hang it on your wall to remind yourself that you will never let it happen again. It’s hard stopping others from repeating their tragedies, but when it comes to your own, you are in control.

Love as many as you want. Kiss as many as you want. Fuck as many as you want. But when you do these things do it with all of you. Do it because you know it will show you something, help you with something, make sense of things. Never do a task that was assigned by someone else if you are not interested, not comfortable, unwilling. You can do anything you want to do as long as you know that there is only understanding and truth behind it. Never settle, never give in and never do anything that you don’t want to just because you feel bad.

Learn to say no. Learn to fight. Learn the difference between love and lust and learn to love yourself. If you love yourself, when you’re alone, you won’t need the presence of another just to make you feel at ease. You’ll have the power of healing in your very own body. You’re beautiful, remember that, write it down, scream it out loud and never forget. You have the entire world inside of your hands and the only thing you truly need to know to push through these trying times is that you can do anything. Now do it.” — "Tips for girls who are still growing up" Colleen Brown

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imreallybad:

imreallybad:

i wish men understood that when women are talking about feminism and rape culture and shit, it’s not just a political conversation. it’s not about being a “social justice warrior” or whatever. it’s about our actual lives being shaped by misogyny since childhood, and the daily reality of living in fear of violence. this isn’t a fucking game or philosophical debate. this is our fucking lives.

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“When 12-year-old girls are watching something like the CW’s long-running campy drama One Tree Hill (which aired from 2003-2012), in which actors like 25-year-old Hilarie Burton played 17-year-old cheerleader Peyton Sawyer, they’re not seeing an accurate portrayal of their future on screen. They’re seeing a glamorized vision of some executive’s idealized version of high school instead. When a real 16-year-old cheerleader flips on the CW and sees fellow pompom shakers who look like Burton or costar Sophia Bush, also well beyond her high school years, they’re looking at themselves at wondering why they don’t look like that in their uniform. Here’s the secret: they didn’t when they were 16, either.” — Samantha Wilson, Why Teenagers Need to Play Teenagers On Screen (via thunderboltandlightning)

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“Before you say yes, get him angry. See him scared, see him wanting, see him sick. Stress changes a person. Find out if he drinks and if he does, get him drunk - you’ll learn more about his sober thoughts. Discover his addictions. See if he puts you in front of them. You can’t change people, baby girl. If they are made one way, it doesn’t just wear off. If you hate how he acts when he’s out of it now, you’re going to hate it much worse eight years down the road. You might love him to bits but it doesn’t change that some people just don’t fit.” — inkskinned, “My father’s recipe for the man I should marry”  (via seaglassnserendipity)

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“Before I am your daughter, your sister, your aunt, niece, or cousin, I am my own person, and I will not set fire to myself to keep you warm.” — 1/? Things To Remember (via egracely)

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“Being born a woman is an awful tragedy. Yes, my consuming desire to mingle with road crews, sailors and soldiers, bar room regulars—to be a part of a scene, anonymous, listening, recording—all is spoiled by the fact that I am a girl, a female always in danger of assault and battery. My consuming interest in men and their lives is often misconstrued as a desire to seduce them, or as an invitation to intimacy. Yet, God, I want to talk to everybody I can as deeply as I can. I want to be able to sleep in an open field, to travel west, to walk freely at night.” — Sylvia Plath

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unclefather:

why does my dad have to give me away at my wedding? my dad doesn’t own me. that’s funny because one time when i was 13 my dad wouldn’t take me to get italian ice so i hit him in the back of the head with my flip flop and he took me. so technically, i own my dad and i should give him away at his wedding.

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“there’s a special place in hell for men who convince women their intuition is insecurity to protect their duplicity.” — dream hampton  (via locsnlyrics)

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“i don’t imagine my princesses in the same way others do, either kissing their husband and in marital perfection or the cynical version where they are drunk in the kitchen, living out their happily ever afters in a haze of poor decisions, no, i think cinderella becomes a fashion designer, i think she stops smoking and takes back her name and ends up making money and being a spokesperson for abuse victims, i think right now if ella was alive she’d be laughing over a pumpkin-spice latte and her empire is the most body-inclusive in fashion

i think snow-white becomes an activist, i think she studies genetics and i think she will allow no person with a disability to go homeless, i think whenever someone makes a joke about seven small men, she whips around and asks them what exactly their problem is because there is nothing wrong with any of her friends

i think aurora is a sleep disorder doctor and a psychologist, she uses hypnosis to help people who can’t quite escape the thicket inside of their brains and i think she’s working on developing a pill for people with chronic insomnia even though everyone still teases her about that one bout of narcolepsy and one day she admits she actually was awake for most of it and just studying

i think ariel has shut down marine life poaching in as many parts of her country as she can, i think that she’s got teams working to clean up oil spills and she’s building windmills in her backyard because she’d rather have the “eyesore” than know someone is drilling in her home, i think she has degrees in environmental science and marine biology, i think she’s got a side project for scuba divers and oceanography and is devising a way for mermaids to visit her land without giving up their tails

i think belle is a veterinarian and runs her practice out of her father’s house where his inventions have saved the lives of at least ninety dogs and i think that she is a teacher in her free time and has raised gaston’s eight kids to be nothing short of polite and well-mannered and i think that she takes frequent trips outside of her little quiet town but always comes home again

i think jasmine is a feminist in every aspect, i believe she works with shelters and soup kitchens and makes sure nobody starves in her city ever again, i think she sets up homes for homeless women, i think she marches in rallies and has a school specifically for gifted girls that were almost married off to strange men

see, i think when we cast these women as only a prize to be won and that their life stops as soon as the credits roll, i think when we joke about how everything went south right after it all, we’re telling girls, “you will regret that you ever fell in love or believed in magic when you were small,” see you can believe in happy endings, but believe too in the princesses themselves, believe that marriage isn’t the only goal a girl can set for herself,

believe that if these girls fought to stay alive when an evil queen was chasing them, if they fought to give up their nature for the chance of more adventure, if they fought the sultan himself and society’s expectations: something tells me that their happily ever after isn’t resting on their laurels, something tells me they’d seek just a little more, something tells me that they’d keep fighting until there is a happy ending for every single little girl

believe in yourself, princess, and know that even if you want a career and husband and twelve happy children, you are not deluding yourself of anything. it is completely possible to actually have everything

it is okay for you to want a job and a home and a family and a kingdom. you are strong enough. you would handle it.

please don’t let anyone tell you different.” — sit tall today, my love. your dreams are valid and you are always good enough. // r.i.d (via inkskinned)

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“Think about the first name you were ever called, and then think how long it took until you got called a pussy or a slut, or a bitch, or a whore, all of which are words that fall too close to ‘girl.’ Think about the first time you got called a ‘girl’ and they said it with a sneer. Like it was a bad thing.

For a boy, it is the lowest degradation to get called a girl. For a girl, it is the lowest degradation to get called a girl.

Remember, black widow spiders and female praying mantises eat their partners after intercourse. Remember, it’s the lionesses who hunt. They come back with bloody muzzles, dragging bloated carcasses as the alpha lion strides around with his mane puffing out. Remember, it’s only the female mosquitoes who drink blood. We’re the ones who do the necessary work, dirty our hands, fuck or fight or both. We’re often the smaller sex, which makes us a harder target as we slink close and sink our teeth in.

Remember: we’re deadly.

You should be proud to be called a girl.” — 'Most Female Killers use Poison,' theappleppielifestyle. (via birthdaybaby)

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“All too often women believe it is a sign of commitment, an expression of love, to endure unkindness or cruelty, to forgive and forget. In actuality, when we love rightly we know that the healthy, loving response to cruelty and abuse is putting ourselves out of harm’s way.” — bell hooks (via memoriasconsazon)

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“Thirteen? And it’s even worse because Bill Cosby has the fucking smuggest old black man public persona that I hate. Pull your pants up, black people. I was on TV in the ’80s. I can talk down to you because I had a successful sitcom. Yeah, but you raped women, Bill Cosby. So, brings you down a couple notches. I don’t curse on stage. Well, yeah, you’re a rapist, so, I’ll take you sayin’ lots of motherfuckers on Bill Cosby: Himself if you weren’t a rapist. …I want to just at least make it weird for you to watch Cosby Show reruns. …I’ve done this bit on stage, and people don’t believe. People think I’m making it up. …That shit is upsetting. If you didn’t know about it, trust me. You leave here and google ‘Bill Cosby rape.’ It’s not funny. That shit has more results than Hannibal Buress.” — Hannibal Buress, calling the shit out of bill cosby [x] (via bluemoonofkentucky)

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“When I was a freshman, my sister was in eighth grade. There was a boy in two of her periods who would ask her out every single day. (Third and seventh period, if I remember correctly.) All day during third and seventh she would repeatedly tell him no. She didn’t beat around the bush, she didn’t lie and say she was taken—she just said no. One day, in third period, after being rejected several times, he said; “I have a gun in my locker. If you don’t say yes, I am going to shoot you in seventh.”

She refused again, but right after class she went to the principal’s office and told them what happened. They searched his locker and there was a gun in his backpack.

When he was arrested, some of my sister’s friends (some female, even) told her that she was selfish for saying no so many times. That because of her, the entire school was in jeopardy. That it wouldn’t have killed her to say yes and give it a try, but because she was so mean to him, he lost his temper. Many of her male friends said it was “girls like her” that made all women seem like cockteases.

Wouldn’t have killed her to say yes? If a man is willing to shoot someone for saying no, what happens to the poor soul who says yes? What happens the first time they disagree? What happens the first time she says she doesn’t want to have sex? That she isn’t in the mood? When they break up?

Years later, when I was a senior, I was the only girl in my Criminal Justice class. The teacher, who used to be a sergeant in the police force, told us a story of something that had happened to a girl he knew when she was in high school. There was a guy who obviously had a crush on her and he made her uncomfortable. One day he finally gathered up the courage to ask her out, and she said no.

The next day, during an assembly, he pulled a gun on her in front of everyone and threatened to kill her if she didn’t date him.

He was tackled to the ground and the gun was taken from him. When my teacher asked the class who was at fault for the crime, I was the only person who said the boy was. All the other kids in the class (who were all boys) said that the girl was, that if she had said yes he would’ve never lost it and brought a gun and tried to kill her. When my teacher said that they were wrong and that this is what is wrong with society, that whenever a white boy commits a crime it’s someone else’s fault (music, television, video games, the victim) one boy raised his hand and literally said; “But if someone were to punch me and I punched him back, who is at fault for the fight? He is, not me. It’s self-defence. She started it, so anything that happens to her is in reaction to her actions .It’s simple cause and effect.”

Even though he spent the rest of the calss period ripping into the boys and saying that you are always responsible for your own actions, and that women are allowed to say no and do not have to date them, they left class laughing about how idiotic he was and that he clearly had no idea how much it hurt to be rejected.

So now we have a new school shooting, based solely on the fact some guy couldn’t get laid, and I see men, boys, applaudin him, or if they’re not applauding him, they’re laying blame on women as a whole. Just like my sister’s friends did. Just like the boys in my Criminal Justice class did.

This isn’t something that’s rare. This isn’t something that never happens, or that a select group of men feel as if they are so entitled to women that saying no is not only the worst possible thing a woman can do, but is considered a form of “defence” when they commit a crime upon them (whether it be rape or murder-as-a-reaction-towards-rejection).

Girls are being killed for saying no to prom invites. Girls are being killed for saying no to men. They are creating an atmosphere where women are too scared to say no, and the worst part is? They are doing it intentionally. They want society to be that way, they want women to say yes entirely out of fear. Even the boys and men who aren’t showing up to schools with guns are saying; “Well, you know, I wouldn’t do that, but you have to admit that if she had just said yes …”

If you are a man and you defend this guys’ actions or try to find an excuse for it, or you denounce what really happened, or in any way lay blame on women, every girl you know, every woman you love, has just now thought to themselves that you might lose your shit and kill them someday for saying no. You have just lost their trust. And you know what? You deserve to lose it.”

—cry laugh feel love peace panic:  

“Wouldn’t have killed her to say yes? If a man is willing to shoot someone for saying no, what happens to the poor soul who says yes? What happens the first time they disagree? What happens the first time she says she doesn’t want to have sex? That she isn’t in the mood? When they break up?" -vampmissedith.tumblr.com

THIS IS MANDATORY READING!

(via feminist-space)

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“Why for example, does a twenty-two-year-old man pursue a sixteen-year-old adolescent? Because he is stimulated by her? Obviously not. They are at completely different developmental points in life with a dramatic imbalance in their levels of knowledge and experience. He is attracted to power and seeks a partner who will look up to him with awe and allow him to lead her. Of course, he usually tells her the opposite, insisting that he wants to be with her because of how unusually mature and sophisticated she is for her age. He may even compliment her on her sexual prowess and say how much power she has over him, setting up the young victim so that she won’t recognize what is happening to her. Even without a chronological age difference, some abusive men are drawn to women who have less life experience, knowledge, or self-confidence, and who will look up to the man as a teacher or mentor.” — Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft (via tszarina)

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barber-butt asked: Would is possible to give your views on the harassment video, more importantly the post you re-blogged about the people saying hello. I've always been a fan of your views and respected your ability to speak out on things.. personally i think the ones saying hello are perfectly fine when done in a respectful way.. even telling a woman they look nice, providing its done correctly.. i think the video was great and it called out cat calling, and rude ways to approach or comment on people

chescaleigh answered: Not sure what else I can add, as I think locksandglasses summed it up perfectly. No, saying “hello” isn’t automatically harassment, but in my experience, men aren’t randomly saying hello to other men on the street. It’s behavior that’s specifically geared towards women, and more often than not it’s used as a way to strike up a conversation in hopes of it turning into something more.

Here’s the thing. When a guy says hello to me on the street and I say hello back, they almost always take it as an invitation to follow me and try to continue a conversation or get my number. If I don’t respond, I’m an “ugly nappy headed bitch”. This has happened to me with guys of all ages and all backgrounds. Even the old guy who looks like somebody’s grandfather has called me a “rude bitch” because I felt uncomfortable when he said hello to me late at night as I was walking home from the train. So it’s damed if you do, damned if you don’t.

But as mentioned in the previous reblog, when your entire day is filled with guys trying to talk to you, it’s hard not to perceive every interaction as threatening or uncomfortable. A woman in NY recently had her throat slashed by a guy because she didn’t want to talk to him. Over the summer another woman was beaten to death because she wouldn’t give a guy her number. Now on the surface, asking for someone’s number doesn’t sound like harassment right? Ignoring someone shouldn’t provoke anyone to violence right? But for these guys, our mere existence is meant to validate them. So saying no or saying nothing at all is somehow a threat. But what was even more terrifying were the scores of men on social media insisting the victim should’ve just given the guy her number, or that women don’t know what it’s like to be ignored. Most men don’t realize what it’s like to be afraid to walk a few blocks to your own home because you have to walk past a group of guys and you don’t know if you should speak or ignore them.

I’ve been threatened numerous times (once had to call the police) and even had a guy try to run my car off the road because I wasn’t receptive to “hey girl” and “you look nice today”. Once a guy told me to smile and when I ignored him he said, “careful bitch or I’ll make it so you can’t smile”. I have no doubt those men thought they were being “respectful” because they didn’t hiss or make lewd comments about my body. I don’t want to push for a world where we can’t say hello or give compliments to strangers, but I think people need to respect the fact that this kind of harassment is a constant issue and as a result, many of us aren’t trying to be rude, we’re just trying to protect ourselves and get through the day alive.

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flash-thunder:

Women make up 45% of the gaming community and 0% of the protagonists of the 25 biggest games of the year.

"Yes, but that’s still a minority! If more women played video games, there would be more reason to have female protagonists!"

Men make up 35% of the cinema audience and 84% of the protagonists of the 25 biggest movies of the year.

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some boy:stop generalizing all men some boy:as a guy, i have to say, this is just how guys are, this is what the bros are like, im just saying whats on every guys mind, if your man says differently he's lying, real men don't ____, im a piece of shit

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“I’m meeting boys who like Charles Bukowski and they all want to do brutal things to my body. They tell me they buy a bottle of whiskey whenever they get one of his books and don’t stop reading till they’ve gone through a pack of cigarettes. They blow smoke in my face and say, “He was the outcast king of L.A. Did you know that, huh?” “Yeah, yeah, I know.” I say. “He’s great.” A boy gives me a worn copy of On the Road and thinks he’s being original. “We should explore the road together. Would you like that, baby?” I take a sip of my water and look away. Yes, I’d like that, I think. But he’s drunk and imagining himself sixty years earlier, in the back of a bar, sweating to the sound of live bop. Still, I prefer him to the hungry boy that devoured my shirt and said, “You have a tattoo? What’s it say?” ‘mad to live?’ What, are you angry about living? Aw, I’m just kidding, come here, let me take off that bra.” The next boy I kiss doesn’t read. I ask him to come to a bookstore with me and he stays outside, sighing. He has no interest in words. He has no interest in me. I am thankful for him. For a few weeks, I am able to shed my habit of thinking obsessively and become a duller, rougher version of myself. I dump him when my fingers start turning imaginary pages in my sleep.

I go on a date with a boy who knows I like to write. He calls himself a fan of mine and swears he’s read every word I’ve put down. “You’ve got this voice that’s very modern, but also so classic.” I choke on my water as he says, “I read you to fall asleep.” I listen to him pant metaphors and compare my mouth to the sea. One day, he stumbles across my journal, and finds nothing about himself in it. “You don’t really love me, do you?” I shake my head. There is no use pretending anymore. He has read my poems about the boys I want to drown in me. His goodbye leaves my hands covers in ink. He wanted me so badly to be the sea, when all I am is a girl who writes poetry. I try my best to become poetry. I take a bath and stain the water with black ink. I cut my hair in a motel sink. I cry for people I have never met. I start smoking cigarettes. I use words like “presumptuously” and talk about “post-modernist new wave.” I walk the streets at 4 a.m. and smile at people coming home from a rave. I wear sunglasses indoors. I carry a 500 page volume of poems wherever I go. I drink coffee instead of water. I talk about the “advantages of using film and listening to records.” But no matter how hard I try, I am not the sea. I am a sunken ship that has drowned in everyone who touched me.” — Lora Mathis, “I Am Not the Sea” (via flythevinyl)

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“Black women wake up in the morning, look in the mirror, and see Black women. White women wake up in the morning, look in the mirror, and see women. White men wake up in the morning, look in the mirror, and see human beings.” — Michelle Haimoff, on privilege  (via purityhole)

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tarsussfour asked: Yo, I don't mean to disrespect your views or change your mind. Just pointing out that hating the opposite gender is what brought along sexism in the first place.

womxxn answered: If you aren’t trying to change my mind then why are you even talking to me about this?  Stop lying about your motives both to yourself and to me.

My hatred is reactionary, my anger is reactionary, my grief for my female sisters is reactionary.  I am reacting  to thousands of years of abuse and subjugation.  

My hatred and my anger will not stop until men stop raping, murdering, and abusing us.  My hatred will stop when there is no longer a widespread need for crisis centers for women because our boyfriends, fathers, husbands, and even strangers feel like our body is their property to rape or knock around.  My anger will stop when little girls aren’t being groomed for motherhood and  for dating men before we are old enough to tie our own shoes.  My hatred will stop when teenage girls no longer have to fend off the gaze and touch of middle aged men.  My anger will stop when women are no longer forced to sell their bodies for food, their sense of selves for a place to sleep.  My hatred will stop when men stop trying to force their way into our spaces, when men recognize that they have been enforcing and maintaining a system that knocks women to their knees so that they can feel tall.

My hatred, my anger, it is reactionary.  Male hatred, that is unfounded.

Spend your time telling them to not “fight fire with fire” or telling them that “hate breeds hate”.  

I am fighting fire with the only thing available to me, go tell men to stop fucking lighting the fires, then we can talk.

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anonymous asked: if you and your partner enjoy kinks that do not harm either of you AND do not involve anyone else what's wrong with that? i can see how non consensually it's oppressive and harmful, but when you trust someone in a relationship you should be able to have sex however you want. comparing a couple with sadist kinks to an abusive person in a relationship is a really serious accusation.

luaren answered: there is absolutely no good reason for participating in sex acts that mimic the trauma of others

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“The fact of the matter is that a comment like ‘nice ass’ feels crude and unpleasant and threatening, because extended from ‘nice ass’ is something slimy and threatening and gross, something sinister. Something claiming that ass as public property. It’s hard to articulate how this feels to someone who doesn’t get it on a visceral level — someone who hasn’t, say, walked down a dark alley in San Francisco on a quick shortcut, only to hear a low, rough voice saying something about your breasts, or your body, or your ass, or some other part of you. That voice isn’t complimentary. It’s asserting ownership, reminding you that you are vulnerable, reminding you that as someone with a body like yours, you are considered to be an object belonging to the public commons.” — ‘Why can’t you just deal with it?’ ‘It’s a compliment!’ | this ain’t livin’ (via brutereason)

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“In San Francisco last year, a man stabbed a woman in the face and arm after she didn’t respond positively to his sexually harassing her on the street.

In Bradenton, Fla., a man shot a high school senior to death after she and her friends refused to perform oral sex at his request.

In Chicago, a scared 15-year-old was hit by a car and died after she tried escaping from harassers on a bus.

Again, in Chicago, a man grabbed a 19-year-old walking on a public thoroughfare, pulled her onto a gangway and assaulted her.

In Savannah, Georgia, a woman was walking alone at night and three men approached her. She ignored them, but they pushed her to the ground and sexually assaulted her.

In Manhattan, a 29-year-old pregnant woman was killed when men catcalling from a van drove onto the sidewalk and hit her and her friend.

Last week, a runner in California — a woman — was stopped and asked, by a strange man in a car, if she wanted a ride. When she declined he ran her over twice.

FUCK YOU if you think that street harassment is a “compliment” or “no big deal” or that it’s “irrational” of us to be afraid because “what’s actually gonna happen.” Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you some more.” — Street Harassment: Is a Man Running Over a 14-Year Old Girl for Refusing Sex Serious Enough? | Soraya Chemaly (via qek)

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liesthepatriarchytoldme:

courtneyrael:

archmasterjazzy:

realjusticewesteros:

nietzschesghost:

liesthepatriarchytoldme:

The patriarchy told me that male rape victims are just as important as female ones.

(submitted by anonymous)

Editors note: Male rape victims aren’t less important than female ones? However,��� Male victims (of both rape and domestic abuse) are often laughed at by authority. No one believes them, and if they do believe them, they don’t care because “they’re a man”. People expect men to want sex under any condition, and to be impervious to violence, neither of which are true. Now, imagine knowing that telling authorities about your abuse would result in being laughed at and dismissed. A lot of male victims choose to handle their abuse on their own because no one takes them seriously. Maybe if we took it seriously, we could all see that it is much more common than we think. Maybe rather than separating male and female victims of rape (and domestic violence) we should focus on the larger problem, of abuse in general, regardless of sex/gender of the abused and abuser. You want to talk about being laughed at and dismissed? Let’s go.

Female rape victims are often laughed at by authority, too, and more often, because men are much larger perpetrators of rape and rape culture than women. Meaning more women are raped. You think only men don’t report rape for fear of mockery but women don’t? Puh-lease. If the female victim is overweight they’re told at least they “got some,” if they’re thin they’re told, “you wanted it anyway,” if they’re wearing revealing clothing they’re told, “you were asking for it,” or better, “you deserved it.” This happens CONSTANTLY AND CONSISTENTLY. And not just by the police. By their friends, by doctors, professionals, teachers, etc.

There are literally millions, MILLIONS, of rape kits sitting in police stations across America (and perhaps other countries) that will never even be reviewed by authorities because rape isn’t taken seriously by the US Justice System.

And like this user stated in a reblog about this ask, “Abolishing rape culture, which is primarily focused on women, will also reduce and/or eliminate male (and other gendered) rape.”

You focus on the MAIN issue, it lessens the smaller issues, and once that is solved, you focus on the smaller cases (which are lesser because you’ve focused on the main one…ahduh). It’s common sense.

And let’s be clear, we’re not focusing on “abuse,“we’re focusing on rape.Ya know, what this post is about. Makes me wonder if you even bothered reading the full post before barging in with your very wrong and uneducated male-centric MRA-style opinion.

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“When we discover that women are the objects of oppression and appropriation, at the very moment that we become able to perceive this, we become subjects in the sense of cognitive subjects, through an operation of abstraction. Consciousness of oppression is not only a reaction to (fight against) oppression. It is also the whole conceptual reevaluation of the social world, its whole reorganization with new concepts, from the point of view of oppression. It is what I would call the science of oppression created by the oppressed. This operation of understanding reality has to be undertaken by every one of us: call it a subjective, cognitive practice. The movement back and forth between the levels of reality (the conceptual reality and the material reality of oppression, which are both social realities) is accomplished through language.” — Monique Witti, One Is Not Born A Woman (via seebster)

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“There is no great stigma attached to being a rapist. Of course, it’s not a word anyone wishes to see applied to themselves. We’d all hate to be called rapists, just as we’d hate anyone close to us to be accused of rape. But when it comes to committing rape - actually having sex with someone who is not consenting? It seems a lot of us are totally cool with that. Go ahead, rape away, just make sure no one calls it by that name.

A 2010 survey reported by Sky News revealed 46 per cent of men aged 18 to 25 do not consider it rape if a man continues to penetrate a woman after she has changed her mind. Last week a survey conducted by Rape Crisis and Reveal magazine showed a third of women do not believe a rape to have taken place if an alleged victim did not fight back. It’s only eight years since a poll by Amnesty International suggested 8 per cent people believe a woman to be totally - that’s totally - responsible for rape if she’s had many sexual partners. The truth is, an alarming number of people are very comfortable indeed with the idea of rape in certain circumstances. Like George Galloway, they merely see it as “bad sexual etiquette.” Rape doesn’t horrify them, not a bit; rape accusations do.” — There is no great stigma attached to being a rapist (via evilfeminist)

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“It’s the Belle Knox brand of feminism. It says that if an individual woman consents to — or even enjoys — performing in pornography, it must be ok. It says that if an individual woman likes pornography, it must be ok. And not just ok, but potentially empowering. I have no idea why we would assume that only men’s sexualities can be shaped by porn or why, simply because a woman’s fantasies have been shaped by porn that means those fantasies and that pornography is necessarily feminist. I don’t give a shit how many people like porn. I don’t give a shit if you say you like performing in porn (most women don’t, for the record, but there are exceptions to every rule that you’re sure to find if you look). That changes absolutely nothing about what porn is and how it impacts our lives and society as a whole.” — Feminism is the new misogyny: On ‘Belle Knox feminism’ and the new backlash  

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“So why do I overreact more egregiously to criticism from women, when all of my childhood bullies were boys? The answer, I think, has less to do with the boys who bullied me, and more to do with the well-intentioned adults who tried to “help” me through that bullying: When I was a nerdy kid, adults regularly assured me that the abuse I suffered was acceptable because one day I would be entitled to constant positive sexual attention from women.

If you were a computer-loving male child who took a lot of shit from your peers, I suspect you heard something similar from the adults in your life. Maybe it was “Sure, things are bad now, but when you’re a little bit older, women will LOVE guys like you!” Or maybe it was “That kid who makes fun of you now will be working at a gas station when you run a big fancy computer company and marry a supermodel!” If you were once young, nerdy and male, it is not unlikely that your future sense of self-worth was funded with a non-consensual IOU from the world’s women.” — Matt LeMay, What (Else) Can Men Do? Grow the Fuck Up. (via sparkamovement)

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“Male survivors charge that feminists see rape as a “man vs. woman” issue… The distinction is that while many women, and some men, are victimized by rape, all women are oppressed by it, and any victimization of women occurs in a context of oppression most men simply do not understand. For myself, I don’t need for rape to be gender neutral to feel validated as a male survivor. And I certainly don’t need to denigrate women, or to attack feminists, to explain why I was abused by the (male) police, ridiculed by my (male) friends, and marginalized by the (male dominated) society around me. It is precisely because we have been “reduced” to the status of women that other men find us so difficult to deal with. It was obvious to me at the police station that I was held in contempt because I was a victim- feminine, hence perceived as less masculine. Had I been an accused criminal, even a rapist, chances are I would have been treated with more respect, because I would have been seen as more of a man. To cross that line, to become victims of the violence which works to circumscribe the lives of women, marks us somehow as traitors to our gender. Being a male rape survivor means I no longer fit our culture’s neat but spacious definition of masculinity, as one empowered, one always in control. Rather than continue to deny our experience, male survivors need to challenge that definition.” — Fred Pelka, “A Male Survivor Breaks His Silence”

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ptrslbrmn:

instead of proclaiming that every girl in the world is sexy no matter what why don’t we start talking about how it doesn’t matter whether or not you’re sexy because sex appeal is irrelevant and is used as a tool for male dominance

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“who taught you that the value of a woman is the ratio of her waist to her hips and the circumference of her buttocks and the volume of her lips? Your math is dangerously wrong her value is nothing less than infinite.” — ‘Greater than’ by Della Hicks-Wilson (via bighappybeauty)

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“After all, if you’re going to call yourself a feminist, you should be willing to back that belief up with facts, right?

And if you’ve got all the facts, it should be easy enough to convince him, shouldn’t it?

And after all, how is he supposed to understand anything if you won’t educate him?

He just wants so badly to understand.

If you don’t mind, could you start by providing him with some kind empirical data that women continue to suffer from systematic oppression? He doesn’t care about the past, and doesn’t want a history lesson. He wants to talk about the here and now. And from what he can see in the here and now, women are doing pretty well. After all, look at you! Smart, well-educated, pretty. What about your gender could you possibly imagine has ever held you back? If anything, it’s probably done you a few favours!” — “Why Won’t You Educate Me About Feminism?” | The Belle Jar

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“I discovered that TED and TEDWomen have never featured a talk on abortion. …When I asked around, the consensus was that the omission was simply an oversight. But it turns out TED is deliberately keeping abortion off the agenda. When asked for comment, TED content director and TEDWomen co-host Kelly Stoetzel said that abortion did not fit into their focus on “wider issues of justice, inequality and human rights.”

“Abortion is more of a topical issue we wouldn’t take a position on, any more than we’d take a position on a state tax bill,” Stoetzel explained. She pointed me to a few talks on women’s health and birth control, but this made the refusal to discuss abortion only more glaring. In the last three years, the United States has seen more abortion restrictions enacted than in the entire previous decade; the United Nations has classified the lack of access to abortion as torture; and Savita Halappanavar died in Ireland because a Catholic hospital refused to end her doomed pregnancy. Just how is abortion not an issue of “justice, inequality and human rights”?” — The Empowerment Elite Claims Feminism, my latest at The Nation (via jessicavalenti)

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“What if the cure for cancer is trapped inside the mind of the baby you’re considering aborting?” what if the cure for cancer is trapped in the mind of a kid born in poverty, who now lacks access to things like good nutrition, good education, a safe environment in their neightborhood, good medical care, and other things that help a child’s mind really grow to be everything it could be? What if it’s in the mind of a child who is denied all of those things but also has to face racial prejudice?

alternately, what if the cure for cancer is trapped in the mind of a 16-year-old girl who, due to a lack of support services and/or access to contraception and abortion, is now stuck working two fast-food jobs to support her and her kid instead of continuing in school?

(what if the cure for cancer would have eventually developed inside the mind of a teenage girl who made a mistake and was forced to drop out of school and never receive an education in order to raise a child she did not want?)

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