#i think I've rambled long enough on that one

[lucabyte]

obligatory ramble about postcanon loop ask

also your art is amazing

Hiiiiiiiii :D thank you :)!!

and thank you for the excuse to post the. just absolute wall of text that i truncated down to form the tags of that post. (i did,,, hit the tag limit. i forgot tumblr had one of those...) so let me just paste that and tidy it up a bit...

I am putting this under a readmore because it's a bit long. but:

This is like. The General Context for all* of my postcanon doodles? (Except AUs obviously) Like this is the base idea I've been drawing them all in. So, feel free to backread with this in mind. I've basically had this 'postcanon' timeline set in my brain since finishing the game...

My general thoughts are that I like the idea of Loop (even if through dubiously ethical means) being able to slowly reintegrate with the party as a whole new person, because they are, in fact, their own person.

It's a muddle of thematic threads im pulling on and "wouldn't it be fucked up if", but. (at its core, it's powered by the fact that like, while narratively isat's theme of 'the only person who can truly take the first step to help you is yourself'. (wrt: loop helping the party help siffrin in act 5) which i LOVE AND IS GREAT NARRATIVELY…. would be super fucked up irl to learn that your friend 'learned as a lesson' while you stood by kinda uselessly. I know i'd be upset about it. but thats mostly background here. doesn't really come up. at least not until loop has to explain who they are and the party realises they had to fall back on literally themselves again for help, but i digress,)

The real core concept is: Occam's razor. It is like, inherently, a buckwild thing to accuse a person of being somehow a clone or copy of your friend. Even if they start vaguely alluding to a backstory it's far more likely they were some other person before all that. (I still think Odile has that theory in the back pocket but she's rational enough to know it's a really long shot without a solid explanation. and i think Loop deep down knows this, and would, if cornered into confessing, turn the situation around to go J'ACCUSE and make HER explain it instead. Ever longer dodging being direct with their emotions...)

And the party are nice! And if someone has changed and wants to keep stuff secret it's kind of not their business? (Though it's hard not to speculate… see: the main joke of the doodles) And they seem important to Siffrin so they just try to accept them abrasive quirks and all. And eventually the question of their prior identity just fades away since, well, they're Loop. Their friend Loop.

but yeah. personal headcanon is that a few months/weeks after picking up and getting aquainted with Nille** (since that was presumably the IMMEDIATE TASK postgame), Loop reappears (either after a literal period of nonexistance, or just spending a few months wandering the french countryside alone being attacked by wild dogs). Since Siffrin has had a while to be therapised by the party they're doing mostly okay, but Loop showing up and still being agitated/aggressive pulls them both into a bit of a backslide behaviourally and puts the party on the back foot again.

Hooowever, I do think that due to no longer being literally stewing in the worst pressure cooker of all time together, the two do mostly actually sort themselves out with productive conversation. (Via a cycle of: genuinely distressing argument -> weeeird lovebombing -> ok we're good -> repeat, that gets less intense over time)

Thus, allowing the party to just. Integrate loop as a new person. They and Siffrin shuffle into different ecological niches (Loop taking over stuff Siffrin is now too squeamish for, etc (see: hunting, mostly)), and while it's not exactly what Loop wanted they generally get that beggars can't be choosers and it's a pretty good deal. And the rest of the party does straight up just like them as a friend, especially when Loop quits trying to actively antagonise them after a few weeks of being around them, since they just can't keep up being mean to people they like forever.

As for how I think the truth eventually drags itself out. This is where I invoke The Isabeau Torment Nexus™. So its gonna get shippy here for a bit hold on.

Which is, I think giving them time before Loop reappears long enough that Siffrin and Iseabeau actually manage to become established, Isabeau has to be the one to nudge the pair of them and go. "Hey. You know we're in Vaugarde right. I'm okay with polyamory if we all communicate." Before Loop and Siffrin actually even acknowledge that whatever the fuck they have going on kinda looks a lot like a relationship of some kind. (or have already been agonising about that via fighting and arguing, depending) (Obviously this comes after Isa "Emotionally intelligent enough to keep a lid on the jealousy" Beau has managed to use that big brain of his to Not just go Scream somewhere on the daily because oh godddd they keep talking like theyre suicide-baiting each other jesus chriiist. is it overstepping his boundaries to bring that up?? god)

This, taking a bunch of the tension out of Loop and Isabeau's relationship (Since I imagine Loop is a. being weird for the obvious reasons and b. feeling kinda guilty about 'getting in the way of' Siffrin and Iseabeau), allows them to actually get close in a normal friend way. (I think an interesting turning point could be Isabeau actually taking Loop's side in an argument vs Siffrin, which would absolutely break Loop's brain. Especially if it's an argument that matters. Like what do you mean he isn't just going to play favourites. What?)

Then Isabeau, just actually open minded and charmed by Loop (and maybe even somewhat at Siffrin's suggestion?) tries to close the final open side on the polyamory triangle here and that's the final straw for Loop on "This lie by omission is too unethical to keep up, this is just actually sick and wrong. I can't do this while he doesn't know who I am." Though. Obviously it probably goes. Very poorly with emotions high like that. And the added element of several months of deceit. Getting dark here for a second but that dagger is going MISSING and so are THEY for a hot minute.

Then yaaay everything works out in the end 👍 yippieee!! all it took was maybe a lot of harrowed recontextualisation of all the weird shit your new friend said and did when it turns out they're your old friend. It's fine.

But yeah. this is basically the context all of my postcanon doodles have existed within? And those exist to give other people something to chew on. So this does too.

I suppose TL;DR: Imagine if sloopis almost fucking happens before isabeau knows who loop is. can you fucking imagine. can you imagine having to navigate that. nightmare.

*Yes this includes the implied cannibalism comic. Uhh. Comes part and parcel with headcanoning that Loop went way off the deep end similar to A5 Sif But Maybe Worse before giving in. Add weepy half-asleep confessions to murder wherever you see fit in your mind palace. 👍👍👍

**Re: Nille footnote. I don't have anywhere to put this besides here! I have some thoughts on Loop and Nille having an odd dynamic. I don't imagine Nille to be super gung-ho on trusting a bunch of adults (even if they are majority around her age) given their implied backstory. It's probably a big shock to the system, especially since Bambouche is a good couple hundred Kilometers up north from Dormont and these guys don't seem to have trains. She would've been unfrozen and without Bonnie for some time....

Which is to say: I think she's suspicious of them. I think she may be looking for excuses to distance herself, keep Bonnie safe. SO.... A new guy showing up? And antagonising the party? What do they know that I don't...? I should find out.

And since... Loop didn't ever know Nille, they have no ammunition or real reason to be cruel. Plus, if they're trying to stay on Bonnie's good side (SINCE... if Bonnie thought Loop was cringe they may as well kill themselves. In their mind.) they SUPER have no reason to antagonise Nille.

Mostly, they might be able to open up to each other easier than they can the rest of the party?

I feel like this resolves with Loop feeling compelled to apologise for what they and Siffrin let happen to Bonnie, though... Hmm... Depends on how you interpret Nille that they'd be glad nobody else had been told about that yet, or furious it had been secret this long. I lean toward the former.

#PHEW THIS IS LONG. i wrote some extra footnotes and tidied it up a bit. but uh. here you go! my personal headcanon baseline for postcanon. #i could probably elaborate more but that would get unwieldy. like i have opinions on loop's dynamics w each party member but. LONG POST... #lucabytetalks #isat #isat spoilers #in stars and time #isat loop #isiloop #sloopis #WONT be tagging everyone thats absurd. loop centric post though with a chunk about nille at the end #isat act 6 spoilers

[bewareofthenewphannie]

Hey sooo could u pls share the twitter essay here👉👈

context

thank you for the ask, I'm honored that you want to hear my thoughts on this, and thanks char for sending your anon over to me!

okay, you see the thing is, the reason I blurred it out is a bit anticlimactic: I have no actual clue what I was talking about.

I don't actually know too much about this topic of what the dynamics between dannies and phillies looked like in the past because I've only been here since november last year and have never seen someone really discuss this in depth, I've only seen it being mentioned in passing. So everything I wrote was assumptions I made based on vague posts and my general understanding of dnp's and the phandom's history. I feel like this was enough to get the gist of this across to someone who doesn't really know dnp (apart from my previous elaborate ramblings about them) but not enough to post it on tumblr.

so if somebody has any input regarding this topic please tell me! and if I'm saying anything that's wrong (which is very likely) please correct me, I'm genuinely curious to hear thoughts on this by someone who actually knows what they're talking about :)

I will put what I wrote, along with some commentary, under the cut!

(addition: as I'm writing this commentary I'm realising how little I actually know, so please don't take this as actual information but more as...an interesting case study of how a new phannie perceives the history of the phandom)

first of all some more background info:

the original question was "[are there any people who] only like one of them and hate/don’t care about the other one?".

some shorter messages leading up to the long one seen in the screenshot:

there used to be a dannie/phillie divide but afaik all the way back in like...2013. now there are obviously people who prefer one of them but not in a way that they actively dislike the other one. and within the phandom I don't think there are really people who feel indifferent about one of them cause yk the thing is, these days it's impossible to watch one of them alone. dan doesn't use his channel, we wouldn't even see him if it wasn't for phil and even when he did a live stream thingy for his solo tour, phil was there. and phil either includes or talks about dan in every video he makes. so I guess either you like both or neither, you don't really have much of a choice also, they make it so goddamn obvious how much they love and care for and apprechiate each other and what an important role they play in each other's life, it would be kind of weird to claim to be a fan of one of them and then hate the person they like the most, yk

this was asked in the context of us talking about why there's this phenomenon that if you have a group of famous people who are strongly associated with each other (for example boybands or actors that work together on a tv show), there'll often be one person that is "hated" by the fandom. Their hypothesis was that this happens when "the one hated is either problematic, doesn’t like the other(s), or is more successful than the other(s)".

okay first the relevant part of my answer: I think overall you're right. I feel like if someone's more popular an important factor for them being disliked is that it feels like they think they're better/more important than the rest of the group. or if they all started out together that they don't apprechiate where they've come from, which both obviously hurts people who like that thing this person dismisses. but this also goes the other way, the people who like that person who is more famous often dislike the others in that group for being "jealous"/"leeching" off of the more famous person's fame.

and finally the thing you actually asked about, the long messages froom the screenshot broken up into multiple parts with the afore mentioned commentary:

now the less relevant part which is just me yapping about dnp and why this didn't happen to them I can imagine that at the very beginning some people probably didn't like dan because he was just some random dude, just another fan, who suddenly was part of youtube and attached to phil.

did...did this actually happen? it seems plausible to me, and I obviously know about charlie etc but how did people really react to dan suddenly being part of the AmazingPhil universe? I know it was an entirely different youtube culture back then and everything happened on a much smaller scale, so it's really hard to estimate how people reacted to this back then. in fact, now that I think more about it, judging from old screenshots I've seen, even at the very beginning people mostly seemed to be quite supportive of them and I think dan got an overwhelmingly positive reponse to uploading his first videos?

can't tell you exactly what went down after that but I do know 2012 was incredibly difficult (long story). things were very tense and especially dan was reallyreally defensive during that time and he had his whole "we're two seperate people" phase.

okay, so if there was any time in the phandom where there was serious tension between dannies and phillies it must've been during this time, right? because from recent discussions I know that there was a point where especially phil wasn't exactly treated the best but I don't know when that was. I feel like it would make sense here though.

anyway, at some point dan surpassed phil's subscribers and I genuinely don't know but I would assume that strengthened that dannie/phillie divide.

Again, I don't actually know when this happened (I would assume some time around 2013/14?) and I have absolutely no idea what the actual reaction people had to this was. but if I know anything about fandoms, this definitely must've stirred up...something. I don't know how obsessed the phandom was with numbers but even if it wasn't that bad, I can't imagine this happening completely without drama attached to it.

but one thing you need to know is that phil was always incredibly supportive of dan and the other way round, dan never talked shit about phil.

correct me if I'm wrong, maybe we simply don't talk about this time that much (with good reason) and I know dan said and wrote a lot of things that were very dismissive about some stuff etc. but in the clips and old posts I've seen he still emphasised that they were friends and didn't hate each other.

and thennn they started their bbc radio show, their joint channel, released a book, went on tour in 2015/16, basically they fully embraced their DanAndPhil brand. this was their peak in popularity and from what I've heard people say that joined the phandom at that time this dannie/phillie divide was basically gone by then because yeah, people liked their seperate things but what really made them blow up was the things they did together.

this is based on something I saw the other day. some people who I know joined the phandom around that time were talking about how they luckily never experienced that dan vs. phil mentality. that's why I wrote the things before this paragraph based on the assumption that the worst bit of the dannies vs phillies thing was before that era and kind of fizzled out by the time tatinof came around.

thennn the hiatus of the gaming channel, coming out (soulmates etc.), dan disappers from the internet (phil's just always there chilling btw). okay the most interesting part comes now, dan eventually writes a book and goes on tour. alone. now if we look at our hypothesis this would be the perfect reason for people to start disliking him, but not with them. phil goes behind dan's back to promote his book, before dan leaves on tour they make this video (https://youtu.be/2M2dF_21ANc) [edit: this is dilm in case you're wondering] where they keep talking about ohhh we've never apart for longer than to weeks oooh how will we cope blah, disgusting. dan makes a youtube series promoting the tour which phil is heavily involved with. and yeah, dan has this "I'm a strong independent dan" thing going on, but it's mostly part of his tour persona. (and also he did have to figure himself out for himself because he's been attached to phil since he was 18, so literally his whole adult life.)

I know some people disliked dystopia daily (which is valid but just for the record, I will defend her with my life) and I know some people generally didn't like/were disappointed with what dan was doing during that era. however. I know that's not representative of the whole phandom and I don't think (look at me assuming things again) those people truly hated dan for it but more like wished that things were different.

and then and then! after the tour nothing...until *drumroll* the gaming channel is back! aka, phil pushed dan to start making dapg videos again and dan's actually enjoying it. and they're fully embracing their DanAndPhil brand again. tl;dr I think the reason why this divide isn't there between them is [because of] how vocally and explicitly they support each other.

THE END

if you've made it this far, congrats, you get a cat! ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

I genuinely meant what I said earlier, I would love to hear more "qualified" opinions on this! feel free to add to this post, completely unravel it...or ignore it if I was too offensively wrong about things :)

#misty says thing #dan and phil #answered asks #phan

[sleepgarden]

new headdress I'm working on for my shop. Lambkin, the pet name varré gives us in elden ring, is such a cute word. The pink yarn is very light against the cream, it's hard to capture but it "blushes" in light, almost disappearing under certain angles and light! Accented with antique lace, and it'll have a gorgeous matching ribbon and bows.

I haven't posted any personal work in a while so here's something I'm taking time on for myself ^-^

#Making egl garments has been a long time dream of mine... imagine I had cute little sleepgarden brand tags #Maybe someday.. #I'm going to be more realistic with my pricing going forward too. I have two other pieces planned #But im going to release things one by one as I make then instead of saving them to post multiple at a time I think. #Esp since I have less time lately. Anyways #I have another needlepoint that says pluto because I've been loving that word. It's so fun to say #It's in a delft blue colour in a different font. It'll probably be a belt cover #Idk who would want something that says pluto on it but I'll throw it out there for any planet and roman mythos fans lol #Okay enough rambling. I've been going through it. As always. My work has been falling behind though. It's nice to have something to share! #Goodnight ♡

[foxaoxarts]

BEE KISS TOMORR- *dead* /j

If anyone wants to watch me drawing this like a little victorian child then the timelapse is below the cut 🤣

(FLICKER WARNING. It's all through out so be careful!👍 )

#RWBY #Bumbleby #Blake Belladonna #Yang Xiao Long #Foxarts #YOUR HONOR I HATE THEM (that's a lie actually) #I'VE BEEN STARING AT THIS FOR 3(?) DAYS NOW AND I'M SICK #Technically this doesn't contain spoilers but let me know if I should add the tag! #In reality I think cloud scene will happen episode 7-ish BUT being delusional is what being a bee fan is all about- #This is the first time I've actually tried drawing a kiss sooooo hope it turned out ok xDD #I am the one who looks away when anyone kisses for more than 2 seconds so. #Kisses aren't very photogenic that's all I'll say (I had 3 tutorials open and 5 references pulled up) #This was so messy- I forewent line art because I hate it and I thought it wouldn't be bad to just clean up the sketch. I was kind of right. #Watching back the recording is funny because I've always known I'm disorganized but just watching it play out is hilarious. #Enjoy my little notes and doodles 😌😌 #They're so soft I want to scream. #I SURE HOPE I DIDN'T FORGET ANYTHING 😭 #Risking my livelihood for these stupids since 2020 *strikes pose* #Anyways that's enough of my rambling. #HAVE A NICE DAY Y'ALL!!

[azaracyy]

one of my finished ych commissions. other finished artwork can be found here. the tailmon is based on the twitter meme / trend of tailmon with pikachu build

#brace yourself long tags of rambling ahead #so i tend to ask my commissioner's permit to post a watermarked smaller version of the art on twt #im a person of my word so im not gonna assume or much less abuse that to simply cross-post to every platform im in #this one is a bit special bc the commissioner is an old friend #tldr we were talking about life and career being the typical adults and they randomly went 'ok draw smth for me' and just... paid #so it's like.... a joke commission? but also not bc the pyment is real?? #but yeah they left the decision of what to draw to me. i suggested what i was thinking of drawing and they went #'do it. finish 2023 with a bang' lmaooo idk if this is banger enough but i clearly had a blast. record breaking fastest comm i've ever done #back in school i doodled pikachu everywhere like breathing so it helped #apparently im given the freedom to share the art however and wherever i like too so yeah bc this is a meme and it is best shared with ppl.. #its kinda cool how we now have the ultimate answer to the question 'which is better digimon or pokemon' tho #upon which im just gonna show this chonky polite tailmon #tailmon #gatomon #digimon #png #finished commission #dood you probably wont see this but ty for the random commission :'))

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

on my quest to find more books to read this year, there's been something kind of heartwarming to see that of the books on hold at my local library, or on the weekly bestseller's list at my local bookstores, there's always at least one book up there that's about Palestine. It's at least nice to see that some people in my area want to learn about the historical context of what's happening now, and learn far more than what a few posts on their feed can tell them. It makes me hope that public perception will continue to change for the better - and that the kind of support I've seen in my area won't die down immediately after a ceasefire is called

#storyrambles #palestine #i'm always hesitant to make any posts about palestine given my lack of personal connection or deep knowledge beyond the #continuous reading i've been doing #but idk. i wondered if this might be nice to see for people who do have a connection and feel discouraged. #and well. i don't think there needs to be a personal connection for one to feel happiness in this sort of situation #it needs to be so much better than it is currently. but i'll be honest #i really thought these protests were going to peter out very quickly after they started. that people would say 'it's a shame' #but not act. i've seen the same thing from previous outrage. #and i think that's because outrage doesn't carry as long or as strong as knowledge does. #eh i'm rambling again. i guess it's just nice to see people caring. even when the people who should speak for us civilians do not. #it's a mixed bag of emotions. #all my love to everyone affected by this. i wish you didn't have to be as strong as you are. #but for as long as you have to. i'd like to stand strong with you. and i hope that's enough to see real change. #ceasefire now

[svtskneecaps]

feel like the global tasks sweep strat should probably be nerfed somehow. my thought would be, give each team an individual ten minute overall cooldown on global task claims. that is to say, a certain team can only claim one global task per ten minutes. say, deliver gas masks, and then in ten minutes you're allowed to deliver tea, and then after another ten minutes you can claim hot chocolate.

another teams would be able to claim a global task for bananas during this time, and their own ten minute cooldown would start.

(the global tasks can either keep their individual ten minute cooldown [i.e. after tea is claimed no one else can claim tea for ten minutes] or a slightly shorter cooldown, say 5-7 minutes)

when a global task is claimed, everyone is notified, right? if not, in my hypothetical, they will be.

then, a team trying to sweep six tasks at once would actually take sixty minutes to do, allowing another team to swoop in and have a chance to stop it in cinematic, entertaining fashion rather than tubbo having to grind resources and then log out in front of the merchant to counter this, which is boring for everyone (including the person delivering). plus, if a team cuts it down to the last second and ends up getting delayed, they physically wouldn't have time to make a delivery, meaning even being a BIT of a nuisance could be a viable strategy, even if you can't manage to kill; if you can STALL you could still wreck their plans.

that's my dream anyway idk i'm not a game designer. just think it would be interesting for most players

(i elaborate under)

red team would have to shake up their strategies, which is fun since they're a team that kinda has to rely more on strategy than outright brawn (overall the team's pvp can't be relied on unless they have carre or phil, as seen today when pierre, bad, and etoiles attacked phil cellbit foolish and baghera, and cellbit and foolish both died to etoiles in the attack, despite it being a 4 on 1 at the time. baghera was killed by bad soon after. phil was the one to get the kills. the first day, when blue attacked [niki, tubbo, and bad as i recall] carre got both kills)

the other teams would then still have a way to stop a global sweep since a sweep would have to start earlier, allowing not only more time to arrive at global to pvp about it, but ALSO allowing another team to swoop in and steal the goal out from under the team again

i'm gonna use it in a scenario bc i'm badboyhalo and i can't stop myself from making examples:

so, tonight, if the proposed cooldown was in place, bad and tubbo would both still had roughly 17 minutes when red team would have HAD to start the sweep process if they wanted all six global tasks: 1 hour until the server closed at absolute MINIMUM. more for safety's sake.

therefore, in this scenario, there's a lot to happen

blue team could wait at globals, knowing red will probably try this strategy, and attempt or perhaps SUCCEED in killing red. if they kill red entirely, the operation is a wash; red doesn't have to gear to come back from scratch and take out blue team, and even if they could, the travel time to return to globals alone would mean they wouldn't get all the global tasks, potentially meaning they don't take the lead. if blue team is unable to kill red and dies themselves or has to retreat, but succeeds in delaying red, red would face the same problem.

if red sends in all of the task items on one person, and that person dies, even if the rest survived, blue could loot the items from that person and would be able to either use the items themselves, if green is currently the owner, or could run away with the items, effectively wasting red's time and again, meaning they wouldn't get all tasks claimed even if they were able to overtake the runner and reclaim their items.

i'm unclear what would happen if red divided the task items between them since it seems like the person claiming the task doesn't have to have all (or any? again, unclear) the items in THEIR inventory in order to claim so long as a teammate is nearby with the items in their inv (evidence: pac's vod "voltei... o que tá acontecendo no QSMP?!" at roughly 3:00:00; tubbo claims tea and tea is taken out of pac's inventory. i don't know the limits of this strategy)

blue team also has time to swoop in and steal a global task out from under red during this time. say, if red team had claimed the task for 10 tea leaves, upping the price to 15 tea leaves, and then blue team snuck in and claimed the task and set the price up to 20 tea leaves, (since the proposed 10 minute cooldown on claims would be TEAM LIMITED; red's cooldown applying to red only and so on). if red waited until the last second, they wouldn't have the time to reclaim this task even if they did have the resources, possibly forcing them to start their sweep earlier to counter this possibility, at which point team members who had logged on earlier and are out of time by the end of the night, OR members who live in time zones that don't allow them to stay up until server close, may have an easier shot at participating in defending against a global sweep.

all of this DIRECT CONFLICT would make for good audience entertainment and heighten the stakes of an attempted global sweep, since it would practically have to be one team defending globals for an hour while they pipe all their resources into it, knowing that if they die another team could easily swipe their task resources and use it themselves (along with the rest of their gear). it makes it more interesting, while still mostly viable.

plus it would force more strategizing for red team which is maybe just a personal plus, i just really like seeing people planning both in advance and in spur of the moment. it's really satisfying to see how a plan comes together and succeeds or fails; plus, since red team is the main team using this strategy at the moment and their main draw and strength as a team is cohesion and communication this would be completely fucking riveting for me as a viewer so maybe this is just a personal thing. but i really really think it would be fun

but again, i'm not a game designer, or a qsmp player, or a qsmp admin, or honestly even really a gamer? so maybe i'm off my rocker and out of my gourd and this isn't viable or balanced in any way shape or form but YKNOW what is this blog except putting stupid thoughts into the void and seeing if this time the void spits back hate mail so. i'm folding this into a paper airplane and throwing it into the abyss. hopefully it made sense.

k love you appreciate you getting this far, have a good week!!

(i hope your team gets a win in dramatic fashion and celebrates together!!! i hope they come together and unleash a plan so spectacular it takes the server by storm!!! i hope it's so good it becomes a vod you go back to even years in the future!!!! i hope you have a good week!!!!!)

#qsmp #qsmp purgatory #shut up vic #block game brainrot #yes it's long beneath the keep reading no i'm incapable of being succinct #i color coded the important parts though i just wanted to try to be clear #examples are my bread and butter i do programming and math they make everything easier for me to understand #god i hope this makes sense to other people i didn't ask my biological peer reviewer so idk if this is stupid or not #tbh it's just a tumblr post so i guess it's whatever if it is but i put wayyy more work than necessary into double checking timelines lol #(i didn't watch blue today sorry :/ idr if i mentioned in the body of the post but i main red team) #(their energy is just more entertaining for me personally; though i kept an eye on pac once i could multi-watch!) #anyway other team mains feel free to weigh in if i'm making weird assumptions about what the teams are capable of #heaven knows my pov is biased here LMFAO #((for what it's worth i am fully aware this means red team aren't rly underdogs anymore and i super want them to be kicked in the stomach)) #((back to the drawing board; what will they do??? I WANT TO KNOW :O)) #((seeing them crawling back to victory from being like two pixels on the bar on sunday was great. more of that pls)) #idk i've rambled enough #long tags #ignoring daylight savings it's technically one am goodnight friends i hope this post doesn't suck hahahaha............... #OH AND IF ANYONE THINKS I SHOULD TAG SOMETHING FOR FILTER PURPOSES ABSOLUTELY LET ME KNOW #i want to be courteous but i think this post is pretty neutral in tone? but if you think it deserves a tag i will absolutely add it!!!!!

[nyoomfruits]

don't you worry about any of that! you write so well that I'll gladly read whatever you decide to publish 💛 I've been thoroughly enjoying not only your amazing lestappen, but everything you've been writing – you do you, and thank you!

aaaah deb please this is so nice ;-; <3

i've not completely abandonned lestappen (i did just come up with wholeass fake dating au that included a lot of clothes sharing between max and charles including the infamous quali pants) but i did suffer some serious writers block at the end of may (which i dont think i really talked about??) which left me not wanting to write anything and i got super frustrated with it.

anyway i've now gotten back to a point where i actually want to write things again so for now i'm just indulging myself writing whatever silly little stories i want in the hopes i'll eventually get to a place where i can write the Serious Big Fics again (like. you know. the roommates au lmao)

but i'm really happy to hear that there's people who will read anything i write it makes me feel very ;-;

#like lestappen is still my home base #but there's something delightfully fun about the lando/oscar dynamic that is just. curing my writers block in ways i cant explain #i think its the possibility for sillyness #like one of the ideas i have rn is a fic in which oscar does a lot of stress baking during race weekends #and like he leaves the baked goods in the mclaren hospitality #lando eats one at some point and is like. i am in love i NEED to marry the girl who made this #and oscar who is like harboring a serious crush for lando at this point is like. well i REALLY dont want to deal with the dissapointed look #on his face when he realizes its not a GIRL but ME who's doing the baking #so he says nothing #and then lando goes on this insane james bond esque mission to find out who mystery baking girl is #ropes oscar into it as well #and then during afternoons staking out the mclaren kitchens and patrolling the cafeteria or whatever lando thinks up #he slowly starts falling for oscar instead #oh and then there's also the werewolf au lmao #but i've been rambling for long enough and maybe like 2.3 people are insterested in this so you know #landoscar

[graham--folger]

*through gritted teeth* what the fuck do people want from a resume

#this semester i've had three different people look at my resume and all three of them were like contradicting whatever the other person said #one said add references. the other said don't add references. the other said no add them back in #one said add color. one said only do black & white. one said no you should have color #also in terms of content they all differed as well like. guys i just want to get this fucking internship so i can get out of here #i appreciate the feedback but i think it's made me more stressed in the long run #alex’s inane ramblings #plus just now finding out im gonna need to do a fucking seminar probably in addition to my internship unless i want to do 4 credits of #internship. i fucking hate seminars. and it's taught by my advisor who i like. but he knows how fucking quiet i am and calls me out on it o #the daily. which gets on my fucking nerves let me tell you #im the most non-english-major english major to ever exist #don't make me talk. please dear god don't make me talk #plus in this seminar we would be writing a 20 page paper. on american romance lit. #sorry dr. phillis but that sounds godawful #and if i decide to do the seminar it conflicts with another class i need to take so id have to talk to my graphic design advisor about maki #a substitution #hell on earth. why the fuck is graduating so goddamn hard #i don't have enough credits to be staying an extra semester so i have to get this all wrapped up by december #alright im gonna shut up now. college is hard guys

[mementoasts]

jonathan sims head archivist of the magnus institute london

#IM JUST POSTING HIM RANDOMLY BECAUSE I CANNOOOOOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME DRAW ANYONE ELSE. I HAVE APHANTASIA MAN IT'S HARD OUT HERE #i just started season 3 and heard him mention the graying hair i was like hm.. what if i tried drawring some characters. #i'm actually super happy with how he looks... i had some prior inspiration bc i followed one artist who's posted fanart b4-- #(which is how i first heard of the series) and so i already kinda had a picture of him in my head bc of that (i love their art sdfghgfdjh) #so i was jus sketchin and i was like.... yeah this looks ok. i wanted his hair to be kinda just pokin up every which way in front-- #--because i imagine him constantly running a hand through it. otherwise it'd look nice n tidy. i just sketched til it looked good enough #the eyes were easy because i wanted sharp and tired. the color was just me testin shit out and being like oooo that looks pretty #the outfit..... i just googled some like business casual stuff LOL. i thought it looked nice #bag and flashlight because he's dungeon crawling #he's also filipino for no reason other than i said so #OHHH YEAH freckles. freckles are cute. also worm scars. #i gotta say i didn't wanna put glasses on him but i thought he looked nakey without em.. but also it might be bc i was strugglin w lineart #the glasses make him look younger i think. which is bad!! he needs to look at least 35!!! #i dunno if i have it in me to draw the others;;;;;;;;;; martin i can't figure out a color scheme for-- and tim & sasha.... waauugghhh.... #it's hhhhaaardd because when i'm like reading anything i cannot *picture* characters.... i just get like..... a feeling yknow..... #again i already had some vague images for jon (and martin) bc i saw fanart before lol so that's what showed up in my head #i have a good *feeling* of what sasha should look like but i cannot for the life of me draw it.... #i keep sketching and going “noo this doesn't look like her” <- i DON'T know what she looks like #i've somehow instead ended up with a sketch that really feels like melanie tho lmao #if you're somehow at the bottom of this long ramble i will send you $500. #the void given form

[kingdom-falls]

Guess who gets to clean out about probably 10 gigs of Pinterest fanart downloads from Google Drive

#Not even joking my Drive is in shambles #Back before I joined Tumblr I was one of the Pinterest 'girlies' #So have So. Much. Supernatural and Homestuck memes and fanart on my Drive #It's ridiculous but I've put it off long enough #And by long enough I mean that I need to clean out space for me to hack my 3DS' #ramblings about nothing/everything #Update: There's so much JohnKat holy shit what was I ON back then #I was starved for gay content man #I don't think I've gotten to the JohnDave or DaveKat section yet #Please note I HAD NOT READ HOMESTUCK when I got INTO Homestuck #But I probably have art that hasn't seen the light of day in 10 years that I gotta get rid of so

[thefearhas]

get to know me tag game

Saw this and now I'm doing it, thank you @loserlesbianongsa!

RULES: bold the ones that are true and tag 15 people to do it.

APPEARANCE

Blonde hair // I prefer loose(ish) clothing to tight clothing // I have one or more piercings // I have at least one tattoo // I have dyed or highlighted my hair // I have gotten plastic surgery // I have or had braces // I sunburn easily // I have freckles // I paint my nails // I typically wear makeup // I don’t often smile // I am pleased with how I look // I prefer Nike to Adidas // I wear baseball hats backwards

HOBBIES AND TALENTS

I play a sport // I can play an instrument // I am artistic // I know more than one language // I have won a trophy in some sort of competition // I can cook or bake without a recipe // I know how to swim // I enjoy writing // I can do origami // I prefer movies to tv shows // I can execute a perfect somersault // I enjoy singing // I could survive in the wild on my own // I have read a new book series this year // I enjoy spending time with (a) friends // I travel during work or school breaks // I can do a handstand

RELATIONSHIP

I am in a relationship // I have been single for over a year // I have a crush // I have a best friend who I’ve known for ten years // My parents are together // I have dated my best friend // I am adopted // My crush has confessed to me // I have a long distance relationship // I am an only child // I give advice to my friends // I have made an online friend // I met up with someone I have met online

AESTHETICS

I have heard the ocean in a conch shell // I have watched the sun rise // I enjoy rainy days // I have slept under the stars // I meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // I enjoy the smell of the beach // I know what snow tastes like // I listen to music to fall asleep // I enjoy thunderstorms // I enjoy cloud watching // I have attended a bonfire // I pay close attention to colors // I find mystery in the ocean // I enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favorite season

MISCELLANEOUS

I can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // I am the mom friend // I live by a certain quote // I like the smell of sharpies // I am involved in extracurricular activities // I enjoy Mexican food // I can drive a stick shift // I believe in true love // I make up scenarios to fall asleep // I sing in the shower // I wish I lived in a video game // I have a canopy above my bed // I am multiracial // I am a redhead // I own at least 3 dogs

Tagging @hoppipolla and @zerberosa and anyone who sees this and wants to do it :), no pressure though!

#I thought I would bold more but I guess this is it :)) #Changed my nose stud to a nose ring a few weeks ago I think my face and nose really suit a nose piercing I'm glad I decided to get one :)) #Ngl at first I thought hm.. I don't travel too much but even going to the same place very often can actually be described as travelling.. #Those very very long car drives are kind of travelling I can't deny it.😭 #I want to be able to confidently say I can speak three languages kind of fluently. But my skills are not good enough.. yet. #I'm working on it. And even if my English is not fluent I am able to speak it and that's enough for now :) #I bleached my hair for the third time last year and now it's a bit damaged.. #The first two times my hair did not get this damaged..😔 But it's okay thankfully I love my natural hair colour too much to bleach all #my hair so I only ever got a few blonde strands :) #Also the Mexican food one.. it's not like I dislike it I just don't think I have ever really tried something authentic? #I don't know. I kind of want to try food from cultures I've never tried before but I need someone to come with. #There is actually a friend who suggested to go to a Mexican restaurant and she also said that she wants to try Vietnamese food.. #I'm gonna text her when I have time again. #It's getting really unrelated here but I would really like to try homemade kimchi one day because I want to compare it to something #I know from my culture bc I read that it's a bit similar. #I watched a Korean street food video with my mum a few months ago and there were a few dishes that locked similar to food we know. #Everything looked so interesting. I'm rambling but it's okay.

[boxchewr]

im not really a homestuck fan anymore nor do i ever have the patience or time to reread it properly but. i will still fight tooth and nail for the fact that there's still a lot of value to that comic

#text #it lands solidly in 'good' category to me it does a lot of things i like but a lot i can't stand #what it does well it does so so well and tho it's very obviously a thing that started in 2009 by someone from newgrounds #and by the end you can tell everyone was tired of it going including the author #and then the fucking. shitty ass followups that seem to actively mock and loathe the fact that theyre homestuck followups #i think the meat and potatoes of the comic itself can be incredibly good more often than it's bad #its Long As Fuck but you know every facet of the significant characters. you grow and bond with them so much #absurdly long stretches of nearly pure dialogue back and forth between characters on a page #and then the next page with even more dialogue back and forth them just talking going on rambles and making jokes #but its so natural and most of the main cast feel super real like these are just some kids having a conversation on skype or smth #also it's still one of the funniest things i've ever read no cap. some of the jokes still stay in my mind forever #its not at all for everyone. not whatsoever. its 85% dependent on you liking these characters enough to see more of them #and just wanting to spend time with these little losers and their dumb overly complicated game #but i did like them! i think abt these characters a lot in my random life still despite not interacting significantly with it in years #and i feel like people are kinda a bit too mean abt it nowadays. acting like it was all a waste of time and there wasn't anything good #when no i still like a good amount of it up until beginning-middle of act 6 onwards when it just gets too confusing to keep up with #i still suggest reading it if you have time. can look past a lot of the early acts saying slurs and such. and have interest in it #at least try to get to act 5 if not beginning of 6 and then go thru 6 until u can't stomach anymore of it or if u reach the end #bc yeah act 6 being a nightmare confusion world is a lot of why i think ppl think it sucks #plus the first acts being a bit. 2009 newgrounds core #but even in those acts there's still some good stuff i wish ppl didn't shrug the whole thing off #Just give it a try see if its for u or not #it was one of the biggest Things on the internet for a while for a good reason #and i think it's a shame that it's mainly just considered. something shameful to like and stupid and has no inherent value to it #when there really is still a lot to like #give it a whirl see how you feel #i'm still never personally touching it again bc of. Generally who i was when i was hyperfixated on it #so. lmao

[hailsatanacab]

Chapters: 2/? Fandom: Danny Phantom, Batman - All Media Types Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Danny Fenton & Damian Wayne, Batfamily Members & Danny Fenton Characters: Danny Fenton, Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake, Damian Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth Additional Tags: Good Sibling Damian Wayne, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Danny Fenton and Damian Wayne are Twins, Danny Fenton Needs A Hug, Implied/Referenced Torture, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Not Phantom Planet Compliant (Danny Phantom), Bad Parents Jack and Maddie Fenton, Gun Violence, Blood and Violence, Gunshot Wounds, Mugging, Medical Torture Summary:

“If you ever find yourself in danger, go to Bruce Wayne. He will help you.”

His mother had loved him, in her own way. If she hadn’t, she wouldn’t have helped him escape. If she hadn’t, she would have dragged him back to the League of Assassins, to Grandfather. If she hadn’t, he’d be dead.

She loved him, but she loved the League more.

Jack and Maddie Fenton loved him too, they did, but they loved their work more.

They loved their work more.

--

After his parents react poorly to his reveal, Danny escapes to the only person he thinks can help him - Bruce Wayne. He doesn't know what to expect when he gets there, but it has to be better than where he is, surely? He certainly doesn't expect to be reunited with his long lost twin brother Damian. It's funny how things work out that way.

-----

Chapter 2!! Chapter 2!! Chapter 2!!

#danny phantom #dp dc #dpdc #bruce wayne #batman #dpdceu #does the space count in the tag? idk #uh anyway??? new chap guys!!! come and join me in hurting danny! #half of me writing this was #oh no poor danny he's just a little baby he's just a child why are you being mean to him #the other half of me was #heeheeheheee and then he gets shot heehooohohoooehhee #i am Mean but also... can't deny the angst #this was only a little chapter and the next one BOY HOWDY AM I EXCITED FOR THE NEXT ONE #i kinda wanna post the next one sooner because things finally happen haha #anyway sorry i think i've rambled on here for long enough #my writing #uh wait should i tag the fic now? #uh. #this is where i forget what it's called lmao #close enough to be whole again #cetbwa #CETBWA what a fantastic acronym to say i love it

[a-passing-storm]

Do I need an electric guitar...

#(the answer is no) #(i do not) #(i want one. kind of badly. will i still want one badly in a week? hm.) #i've been thinking about getting an electric guitar for a couple weeks but... is that long enough #i don't think so. i have an acoustic guitar already. and bass is definitely my Primary Instrument (read like “preferred weapon”) #but someday... maybe i'll get an electric guitar. maybe. i don't know. #i DO have my own money now though. since i got a job. and i could certainly afford an electric guitar. but like... is it worth it #probably not. whenever i use my friends' electric guitars i am weirded out by how small they are and how bendy the strings are #like they are... soft. the strings. they are thin so they hurt a bit but they bend SO much. it's weird. acoustic has more resistance #or something. idk. but when i try to play electric the strings just w o b b l e. this is such a weird ramble it has such a weird cadence #but it's fine. #anyway acoustic guitar feels more like electric bass than it does electric guitar #to me. at least. i think i will still go to guitar center tomorrow to try some electric guitars out. but i won't buy one. #also feel free to read this whole ramble but replace “electric guitar” with “five string bass” because same thoughts #dante dicit #dante digreditur #bassist #guitarist #bass #electric guitar #guitar

[theninjamouse]

A purely self indulgent birthday reflection cause hey it's my birthday in 13 days. Forgive me if it's a bit rambly, I wrote it very late last night

I'm 30 years old this month. I've done a lot in my time on this earth. Doesn't always feel like it, but looking back, yeah. I've done a lot of things that most people haven't.

I traveled to Italy with a group of high school girls in my freshman year to perform in the New Year's Day parade in front of the pope. I wore a kilt. The air was freezing and my knee went numb from kneeling as strangers took pictures of us. I accidentally drank coffee and was terrified that I had broken my church's word of wisdom. I got an oversized hat that is now faded and dull and tucked safely in my chest of memories of that trip.

I worked at Disney World as a character performer. My wrist was fractured in my first 6 months by a man twice my height who decided to high five Mickey Mouse as hard as he possibly could and snapped my wrist back. I wasn't allowed to make noise on set, so I held in my scream until I stumbled backstage. To this day, 10 years later, that wrist still gives me pain when I overwork it or when the air pressure changes. I performed in front of thousands, I hugged even more. I had people cry with joy in my arms, I comforted those who saved money for years just for the chance to meet a character and found themselves falling apart because I was someone SAFE I was someone they loved and trusted. I've played peek-a-boo with babies that shrieked that bubbling laugh that only babies have. I've directed the hands of a blind girl over my character head and watched her smile so bright I was nearly blinded. I've tripped over my own dang costume and landed flat on my back and got up to people cheering when I bowed to show I was okay. I've been with Stitch and cupped my hands around a baby duckling to help it over a little curb because my hands were the only ones protected from the agitated momma duck. I have a tattoo of the last day I spent with Stitch on my thigh now because he was my favorite.

I begged the managers to train me in a show. A parade. Anything. I was told that it was up to faceless Casting who had never met me, didn't know that I would train and practice and do whatever they asked of me. I was never given a chance.

I was assaulted in costume, time after time until the final straw was an old man, drunk at 11:30 in the morning who humped me from behind, grabbed my chest and tried to rip my character head off. I was told I should've spoken to the restaurant manager on staff who had already left when this happened. I wanted to file a police report. I was told there was no point.

I put in my two weeks three days later. I received a curt acknowledgement and no thank you for four years of my life spent there. To this day, there is a part of me that absolutely aches to return. That wants to believe that things would be different now. I don't know if my broken body would allow it anymore.

I've skydived. Ten times I've skydived and nine of those were solo jumps. The first time I jumped alone, the terror that grabbed me by the neck had my whole body shaking as the plane climbed higher and higher. When it was time, the door opened, I was instructed to climb out onto the wing. The wind was so strong that my entire body lifted the moment my feet left the little step and I could only hold on with hands that were shaking so bad I knew I wouldn't last for long. I held on until I was told to let go and I-

Fell Down and all the weight, all the pain, all the fear was sucked away with the plummeting wind and I felt ALIVE in a way that I hadn't for years. I only free fell for a few seconds. The harness dug so tightly into my chest and thighs when the parachute caught that I was covered in deep purple bruises for weeks and I showed off those bruises with pride because I had DONE it, I had fallen through the air and landed and survived and I knew I would do it again and again and again.

I've climbed up aerial silks to dangle up in the air, twisted in the smooth fabric. I've climbed and climbed because I had to be strong, I wanted to be a performer that people would watch with awe because just because I left Disney, didn't mean that I had lost the ability to perform, right? I pushed myself too far, I damaged something in my elbow and I am afraid that the pain will never go away.

I've watched my younger brother lose his words. I still remember when he used to speak, in that way that little kids do. He was diagnosed with autism and several other medical conditions. My mom used to record videos of him and ask him questions for the doctors to examine his health and mental state. She asked him what his favorite movie was once. He answered "Space Chimps!" Then he said, "Happy, I'm so happy!"

That was many, many years ago now. He's an adult now. He doesn't speak now, not much more than basic words that we have to prompt him to use. He has seizures now. I've had to drag his thrashing body out of the bathtub to save him from drowning. I've pulled my car over and leapt out of drivers seat to help him lie down and watch for the signs that I need to call an ambulance. Last month, he had a seizure so bad that I saw light drain from his eyes and for a solid fifteen seconds, I was certain I had just watched my baby brother die. Then he breathed in and I nearly fell to my knees but I couldn't because there was still work to be done to make sure he was okay.

My other brother, the youngest of the family has autism and crohn's disease. Whenever we go on outings or family trips, he's glued to my side because I'm the oldest and I raised him when my dad was not allowed to live with us and I was the oldest of five and I had to be an adult at 14 years old. Whenever I visit, he wants me to hold him while he gets his shots done every Sunday at home. They're easier than the ones he used to have to do every month. Those were the hard ones, when I had to hold him down while the doctor tried to insert the needle, listen to him scream and tell him through my streaming tears that I was so, so sorry that he has to go through this. He got taller than me this year. He still ducks his head to my shoulder when he gives me a hug.

I've lost both of my grandmas. The one I was closer to just this year. She taught me to love stories and movies and books and I made it back in time to say goodbye. I had promised her a photoshoot with her and my grandpa. It wasn't the one I wanted, but I did it, with her stuck in bed, tubes attached all over and her smile wide and eyes present. She kept reaching up to touch my red dyed hair. She told me I was beautiful.

I've never seen myself as anything other than horribly, unbearably ugly.

The family dog died a week after she did. I couldn't attend her funeral because I had to go back to work several states away.

I quit that job soon after. I ran from a project that I am terrified to return to because my pain made me act rashly and I am still so afraid to show my face there again.

I spent 45 days in the woods in New York state working as a photographer for a youth camp, assaulted by allergies, a flooding room and mice and snakes making their home in my room. I traveled to the big city alone, stayed in a sketchy airbnb alone because no matter what, I wanted to see Alex Brightman in Beetlejuice the musical and I did not care that I was being stupid with my safety because there was a part of me that did not care if I didn't come back.

I saw it twice. I cried both times. It's a really, really good show. There's a bakery in Times Square called Angela's with the best strawberry shortcake I've ever had.

I have written over 760,170 words in stories written for Undertale. I've poured my heart and soul into my writings and I've met the most unbelievably kind people because of it. My best friends are in my life now because of those words I've written. I had my first relationship because of the words I've written. I've clung on to this little game and the stories that have come to life because of it with the desperation of someone drowning because it has saved my life over and over again. I have so many stories I want to tell, I have so many I want to publish as a physical books I can hold in my hands.

I've voiced ads on the radio. I voiced Frisk in an Undertale video that makes me a blushing mess to watch because I didn't realize what the full context of the video was. I still want to voice act professionally.

I've traveled all over the states as a photographer. I found a ghost town in the mountains of Montana and walked through the foggy and deserted streets and caked my work shoes in mud. The air up there was the freshest I've ever smelled. I once drove fours hours to do pictures at a school with 9 kids in total. I showed them all my gear and explained how it all worked and let them take pictures of each other. Maybe one of them will grow up to love photography, become one as well. Maybe not.

I've had so many close calls while driving drowsy that it's honestly a miracle I haven't crashed.

I think I need the same surgery my mom had for a hiatal hernia. I don't have the insurance or money for that, so I deal with fits of vomiting a few times a month and wiping my mouth and going back to work.

I just got a job with a traveling photography company for dance competitions. I want to hope that this is finally, finally the break I have fought for for seven years.

I am so scared that I will never fall in love and that no one will ever love me as a partner.

They say that your 30's are when you really start to figure things out. I don't know what it will bring. I'm scared and I'm tired all the time because I believed for so long that once I turned 30, it was all over.

But I'm still here. And I'm finding that life doesn't end once you hit 30. I'm trying to look at life as taking things event by event as they come. I'm trying to let go of the 'What If's' that have kept me running and paralyzed for so long. I've grown and I've changed and yet I still feel like the little kid leaving home for the first time at 18, with no idea of what was going to happen next.

I guess there's nothing to do but see what the big 30's will bring. I'm getting the feeling that my life is only beginning.

Happy birthday to me.

#the ninja rambles #long post #hey ninja who asked for this absolutely no one thank you #there's even more stuff but i've written enough i think #i'd like a little birthday cupcake please