#i think it might be because people don’t know how tumblr blacklisting works

[rubberduckyrye]

Why I will never RB your Art if you say “Don’t Tag as X” (And why I will probably block you for it)

Okay so I’ve seen this. So many times in the tags, so many times on art posts that were otherwise good and awesome that I would have reblogged--but then I saw the “Don’t tag as X” thing, and rolled my eyes and chose not to RB the art. In some instances, I even block the artist.

Most of the time, this is in relation to ships and art that can be interpreted as shippy but the original artist doesn’t want their work to be interpreted that way. Which is the first red flag for me--art is meant to be interpreted in a million different ways. No two people are ever going to interpret any kind of art the same way as another person. So trying to control how people interpret your work is at best, a fools errand.

However that’s more of a petty reason above all else--the main reason why “Don’t tag as X” is a huge problem is, in relation to how people interpret things differently, is that no matter what you do, people WILL interpret your art in a certain way. A certain way that may involve being a trigger for them.

So let’s say I see an art piece that is... let’s say it’s for Character B and C. The artist asks me not to tag my potential reblog as BC. Let’s say I decide to oblige by the Artists request and don’t tag it as BC.

So let’s say we have Follower X. X used to heavily ship BC to hell and back, but because of harassment, they can no longer even look at B and C together without thinking about the harassment they faced. It’s a proper trigger for them. It’ll give them panic attacks upon seeing it.

Now let’s say we have Follower Y. Y never really shipped the ship itself, but their ex shipped it a LOT. Their ex was abusive. They associate the ship with their ex, so the ship is a trigger for them--just seeing B and C together triggers them. They get sick to their stomach upon reminders and avoid the ship for their mental health.

Follower Z is a bit different. They just don’t like the ship, and want it tagged for blacklisting purposes. Vague art of B and C being cute and cuddly included.

So now here’s a problem with “Don’t tag as X.” The artist doesn’t want me to tag their B and C art as BC. Except three followers really need that ship tagged as BC.

“But it’s not ship art!”

It doesn’t matter if it is, or isn’t “ship art.” Well what you mean is “romantic ship art” anyway, so any and all platonic art is a form of ship art, but I digress. It doesn’t matter if it was intended as ship art or not. People will interpret it as ship art regardless.

“You can make blacklist tags for those followers!”

No, I can’t. Not for everyone. I never said I personally knew X, Y, or Z as my followers. I can’t tag what I don’t know--and if I tried to tag every post with “(Follower) don’t look” I’d have a bajillion tags like that. It’s not practical.

“But tumblr makes you see tags in your activity feed and I don’t want to see people tagging my art as X!”

Oh well. Sorry, but I can’t really feel a lot of sympathy for people who are making it more difficult to allow others to curate their own experiences.

“But it triggers me to see my art tagged as X!”

That’s a right shame. However, you should be aware that even if people RB your art without the tag, people will still consider your art in a way you don’t like. This is something to discuss with your therapist or peers, because trying to police how others interact with your work is not it, fam.

“I’m still going to say don’t tag as X.”

Then be prepared to get blocked. I’m not obliged to RB your art, and I don’t want to see your art anymore if I can’t reblog it safely and add tags that I think are necessary.

“But you’re hurting artists by not RBing their work! You should just respect their boundaries!”

I am respecting their boundaries, but nice straw-man. Me not RBing their art is a form of keeping to that artist’s boundary. “Don’t tag as X”? Then I won’t reblog it, meaning I won’t tag it as X. Congrats, boundary respected. The artist might not like it, but that’s just how it is.

If they want their work to be seen by the mass public, they have to get comfortable with the idea that people are going to misinterpret their art and intentions behind their art, and that’s okay. If they are not at that stage of acceptance, they aren’t ready for it.

Anyway, that’s my Hot Take of the day. Brought to you by someone who’s seen “Don’t tag as X” one too many times.

#Salt fest #Can you tell I'm tired

[maybestronger]

A study of one Chrissy Cunningham (of Stranger Things fame) through the tropes of : All Guys Want Cheerleaders, Broken Bird, Cigarette of Anxiety, Hair of Gold Heart of Gold, Sacrificial Lamb, && Stepford Smiler!

Personals && those under the age of 18 (preferably 21) do not interact.|| 25+ Mun

MUN :

Name : Tara

Age : 29+

MUSE :

Name : Chrissy Cunningham

Age : 18 (As of her senior year in 86’)

Faceclaim : Grace Van Dien

LAWS :

NO GODMODDING : A little bit is okay here and there but please. Nothing big. If it moves the story along and your muse is simply flowing, go for it. But Chrissy is my character and I would prefer to play her how I see fit. That sound fair right? If you think something might be considered too big just to assume, please feel free to ask!

MUTUALS ONLY : I really hate to say it, but as it tends to make me uncomfortable when people jump into my inbox or IM’s with things when I’m not following them, its gotta be said? I usually look through my followers every so often though so if I’m going to follow you back, it should be fairly quickly. If you see something in the tags such as an open starter, that’s fine to reply to, but I reserve the right to not answer.

VERSES : Unless otherwise stated, I will place Chrissy in whatever verse I think fits the best. I would be more than willing to plot something out before hand with you though so all you need to do is slip me a message and we will figure something out! You have no idea how much I love to plot things. That goes for AU’s as well. I love them to pieces.

SHIPS : I ship Chrissy/Chemistry. I will not force a ship on you and if you are feeling as though I am, please come and tell me. I will change whatever it is that is making you uncomfortable though I do expect the same from you. And on the topic of ships, I as the mun am over the age of consent in every country and am therefore able to rp smut, and in most cases am willing to do so. That being said, I will not be rp'ing such topics with those that are below the age of 18. If you wish to fade to black or take things off tumblr (discord avaliable) please just let me know!

FORMATTING : I do not mind how you format to be honest. Although I do prefer small text paired with icons (gif icons are okay as well, though just know I only use icons at this moment in time), if that isn’t something you do, it’s okay! You can copy my formatting if you wish, but it is unnecessary, as I will likely not do the same in return. I’ve grown used to my formatting. I realize that this seems to be a large topic of discussion around here, but it’s all good to me haha.

IMPORTANT ADDITIONS : This is a safe place blog. Truly and wholly. Everyone from Billy to Vecna is welcome here. If you don’t like it, you’re more than welcome to block and move on, or simply blacklist certain usernames because I tag them each and every time I post a reply. If you do wish to interact but don’t want me on the dash for whatever reason, we can move things to discord if that would make things easier - it’s entirely up to you. Make your space comfortable. That goes for DNI’s as well - I don’t particularlly listen to them. I haven’t been in this fandom space for over two years now, so I know I’ve missed out on a ton of drama. And it isn’t something I really wish to keep on top of. If you have to unfollow in order to keep your peace, I won’t be offended. Just let me know if you’re still interested in interacting and we can figure out a way to work around it. <3 Stay safe out there folks.

#pinned #rules under the read more <3 #updated : #4/18/2024

[tractorbeamofwoe]

okay so I’m kind of in a weird place rn and idk what to do. I don’t really know how to explain how I’m feeling so just bear with me but I feel like I’m sort of losing interest in catb tumblr/the fandom (I think that’s become pretty evident over the last year with me reblogging mainly non catb related stuff). I think it’s mainly due to just not having any more new content to post about so seeing all the same posts on my feed is getting boring and talking about all the same things is just sort of losing its appeal for me. I’m over the split now, I’ve moved on.

TLDR (if you don’t wanna read my whole rambling speech below the cut): Basically I’m taking a break from/leaving catb tumblr in favour of other fandoms that are more active because I feel like I’m screaming into the void here currently but I am going to continue writing, though there will be some other fandom stuff thrown in there

But at the same time it’s losing its fun because I don’t talk to anyone really anymore. Like i barely get interactions anymore and I feel like I’ve been blacklisted or shunned or something ?? Like I feel like I’ve done something wrong so that I’m being ignored or there’s a quiet mutual dislike of me but idk what ? I can tell it’s stemmed from like the last two dramas that I got involved in but like considering some people reached out and were reassuring me and made me feel like we’re on good terms and now are just acting like I don’t exist...I’m ngl kinda stings a bit. I really loved and valued the friendships I had with people on here and I loved this tight little community we had where we’d all support each other but in the last year I think catb tumblr has lost that aspect.

I know I haven’t written much in the last year but even when I do it’s like months of work just for it to get one like and it’s just not exciting or rewarding or inspiring me to keep going anymore if anything it’s just becoming a chore and is kind of draining. I LOVE writing don’t get me wrong and I still have so many WIPs that I’d like to get finished but I just cannot be bothered to do that knowing I’m gonna be really proud of it and it doesn’t even get read.

This part is just aimed at the fandom in general so please don’t feel like you’ve done anything wrong but I think I’m gonna start unfollowing a load of catb blogs too. Because where I used to like every single post, every ask, every reblog, every picture on my dash and leave comments I now just skim through my TL and just sort of like the odd one or two posts. But that’s the thing, I always made an effort to like every post I saw so people felt seen and didn’t feel like they were screaming into the void, but I don’t feel like I ever got anything like that back and I myself these days just feel like I’m talking to a brick wall.

Like I said, I’ve still got loads of WIPs so I’m not gonna stop writing for catb (and this doesn’t apply to Inhaler, I adore the inhaler fandom on here and I’d like to spend more time getting to know my Inhaler mutuals. Still gonna write those Sam WIPs too) but I’m also part of so many more fandoms now that I’ve actually been wanting to write for for a while now but never did because I felt tied down to only writing for catb. I’ve been talking about the idea of rebranding for a while and again never really had the guts to do it but this time I think I might, just need to decide how I’m gonna do it first.

So I guess uh shameless self plug if you’re into britpop or stranger things or just movies I guess then stick around :)

[syscurse]

not trying to cause drama but what do u think about the pxrn videos and stuff being sent to anti endos? and anti endos getting hate anons from pro endos?

First of all, I just want to say that it's completely understandable to be overwhelmed by all of this. It is really overwhelming. I read the other ask that you sent and wanted me to keep private and I agree that it sounds like dissociation. I'd really encourage you to consider blocking or blacklisting the syscourse tag and unfollowing any syscourse blogs at this time. Even if it's just temporary. Please take care of yourself!

AFAIK there’s no solid proof about anything beyond he said-she said and anon asks. While it’s important to support people who are victims of online abuse, and never ever say they’re faking, I also agree that the way some people are handling these situations does feel a little odd. I can think of multiple reasons for that. For one, someone might not know that there are many things they can do to prevent anon hate & online abuse.

How to handle anon hate:

I’d really encourage people who are receiving anon hate to turn off anonymous questions. You can’t get anon hate if you don’t allow anons! You can do this by going to your blog settings.

Anons can also be reported and blocked. If you report them, Tumblr will be able to take action against the person behind them. Blocking an anon will block the person’s IP address. Be sure to report before you block, because I’m pretty sure blocking deletes the ask too!

Blocking doesn’t always work, though, so if you’re still receiving anon hate then you should, first, report it and then turn off anonymous questions in your settings.

Also, be careful about posting the anon hate. For example, if you received anon hate with a link to a virus, and you post that...you are now exposing all of your followers to a virus. Anyone could potentially click on it. 

If you have been sent explicit content, report that and DO NOT POST IT because you will technically be breaking Tumblr’s TOS by putting that on your blog. You should screenshot the evidence and report it.

Other precautions you can take:

Don’t share personal information on the internet, like your legal name or where you live

Don’t click on any links you receive from blogs you don’t know

Shut off submissions

Do not allow asks with media

Only allows DMs from blogs you follow

Consider remaking your blog

Consider using a different pseudonym

Hide your blog from search results 

Report any known blogs that are harassing you

Contant Tumblr’s help center for more information on what you can do

If you are being chronically stalked/harassed, SAVE ALL THE EVIDENCE

Some resources:

System Internet Safety (Resource Post)

Self help Resources

Coping with Syscourse

I want to say that if you are someone who is following a person who is constantly receiving anon hate...please check in with your mental health. Witnessing that can be extremely overwhelming and even retraumatizing. You are responsible for no one’s mental health except your own. Please take care of yourself!

I also need to be a bit blunt about something. This isn’t directed at you, anon, it more about something I’ve been seeing lately... If someone is genuinely being harassed or stalked, that is NOT syscourse. That's abuse. Abuse should NOT be used for discourse points.

I know someone who was genuinely abused by a pro-endo. Anti-endos took their abuse and used it to bolster their side. Basically used real genuine trauma someone went through as discourse points. Because of that, NO ONE BELIEVED THE PERSON WHO SURVIVED THAT ABUSE. They had to deal with people constantly fakeclaiming them and saying that their trauma was just something anti-endos made up to shit on the endogenic community. In reality, it was never about discourse to begin with.

Please do not use someone else’s abuse to make a statement on pro-endos or anti-endos. Don’t turn someone’s trauma into fucking discourse. It crosses too many lines.

That being said, I also understand what it’s like to question what’s real and what’s not. Especially as a dissociative person. It’s true that people do fake being cyberbullied sometimes. It’s pretty easy to do that online, especially on Tumblr where you could just send yourself an anon ask. But I don’t think it’s right to claim that people are faking, on the off chance they aren’t. ALWAYS give people the benefit of the doubt and believe people who confide with you about their abuse.

Although, there are some cases where people fake being cyberbullied in order to harm others. I actually had an ex-friend who did this. He would send anon hate to himself for ulterior motives. He did it for basically everything. For control, support, money, notes, followers, attention, and to bolster his side in discourse. He also did it to manipulate the people he was abusing. The only reason I know it was him was sending himself anons was because he got caught by his partner, who he was also sending anon hate to so frequently to the point that they started having nervous breakdowns thinking they were being stalked.

I’m not sharing this because I think you should doubt people, but I think it’s important to be aware of these possibilities and develop some healthy caution. The biggest warning sign imo should be your own mental health. Pay attention to that. You are responsible for your own mental health and protecting yourself from cyberbullying. The same goes for everyone else.

No matter how many resources and advice and helping hands I or anyone else offered to my ex-friend, nothing changed. He never genuinely tried to stop the anon hate, because in reality he didn’t want it to stop. He benefitted so much from it. Every time he hurt me and I tried to communicate it, suddenly he was conveniently flooded with more anon hate and I needed to immediately stop holding him accountable and start comforting him, instead. None of that is normal.

Please, if you’re ever in a situation like that, always choose yourself.

#syscourse #long post #abuse tw #stalking tw #idk what else to tag this as #sorry the last half of this sorta became a rant #i hope this helps a little

[ufuckingpastry]

hey not to start shit but since empires smp is a family friendly series and pixlriffs a family friendly creator and large portions of this fandom are minors do you really think its fair to put a post about an explicitly and exclusively nsfw thing in both of the main tags for that. like do whatever i guess but at 27 years of age do you really think putting that in a place where kids are almost definitely gonna see is fair.

In my experience, anytime someone says “hey, not to be [whatever], but…”, they are almost always trying to do that thing. And I fully recognize that you’ve probably come in here, Anon, to stoke a defensive reaction out of me in hopes to start some shit. I’ve been at work for 8.5hrs today and I’ve had my time to cool off, so you’re not gonna get an infuriated reaction or some kind of sassy response. 

TLDR: I use tags the same way that I’ve used them for the nine years I’ve been on this site. Which is mostly to help me keep some level of organization in my own blog, as well as make sure that I’m tagging for things that people might want to blacklist. Every fandom seems to change how they do things, and I’m still trying to learn all the nuances of the fandoms I’m in on how to tag stuff. So if you have a tag for me to use instead, let me know and I’ll start adding it to my posts so that I can make sure that any person who doesn’t want to see that content can avoid it.

For the writing challenge I’m doing, the tag you can blacklist is “kinktober fic fest”. Or, if you really just can’t stand to see me and the content I put out, the block button is right there, and I highly recommend that you use it. Blacklisting tags is actually a function that works on this dear site of ours, as long as people continue to tag their things.

For the record, nothing of what I write about in regards to SMPs has ever been about the real person behind the screen. I don’t write RPF. Anything that I write is about whatever character that is being played, with maybe some slight tweaks to help tell the story better. Empires SMP, especially season 2, is incredibly bold with their pole dancing jokes, or calling people ‘daddy’ with emphasis on “sharing their hard wood”, because that stuff isn’t really for kids. But those jokes are often in family friendly material because it’s going to fly over the kids’ heads. None of my fics are for kids, so I tag things to the best of my ability in order to make that clear.

Do you really think it’s fair to come into a random person’s inbox to tell them that they need to sanitize and censor themself for some hypothetical children that might come across that post? I put everything that was actually explicit under a read more that, by default, you have to click to see the rest. Which is very much like opening a bag labeled “dead dove, do not eat” and being infuriated to find there’s a dead dove in the bag. I recognize that maybe a community label should have been applied to the post, but I didn’t feel like it was necessary since the post was literally only about how I was going to tackle that writing challenge. 

You can be damn sure that any explicit fic I post on tumblr will be labeled correctly, to the best of my ability. Every bit of explicit stuff will be put under a read more, so you will have to click it to be able to view it.

And if some hypothetical children come across something that is very clearly labeled with the things they don’t want to see, and they’re still upset about it being in the main tag because I don’t know where else I’m supposed to put it, then, to be frank:

That’s not my problem.

Have a lovely day

#pastry noises #pastry answers #you get no other tags on this post anon

[transmalewife]

i’m a bit confused by the concept of tagging things as ‘not image described’. obviously when the op does that with the assumption that they’ll remove it if they see someone has added a description that’s great, but i regularly see people add that tag when reblogging posts with 100k notes and i find it hard to believe that they went through all the notes to find a description. at that point it would take less time to just describe it. but they tag it as not described anyway which means people who have that blacklisted won’t be able to see the post at all, even if there is another thread with descriptions going around. like the thought behind it is great but i think we should try to find a better way of executing it

#i think it might be because people don’t know how tumblr blacklisting works #in my understanding if even one person adds the tag the whole post gets blocked #i’ve also had people tag my posts described in alt text as not described #i’m not perfect about this either i’ve been steadily going back to describe my old pictures but yeah there’s still a ways to go #image id #mine

[incarnateirony]

This isn’t even really my personal take or what I personally plan to do, but seeing fandom unironically play itself on engagement time and time and time again, maybe this will break through to some people.

So you’re big mad about SPN! I might be relatively at peace with it, but you’re not! That’s fine. Allow me to actually help you guys learn how to send a message that doesn’t end up with the business team sitting smugly!

There was a nonnie a few weeks back that told me I was ~arrogant~ for telling them to stop engaging the content. Something about privilege. What Nonnie lacks perspective on-- on most social media platforms, any engagement is good engagement.

I’m using tumblr as the platform to even send this out because it’s the least important among social media platforms. It doesn’t clock on, say, Nielsen, and it’s ad space is relatively laughable despite trying to clean up its image. 

But just like I told everyone for the last two years, and just like the suit ridiculously preached to me as if I hadn’t already been preaching it: to them, all engagement is good engagement.

There’s nothing you can do this late to change anything. What you CAN do is send a message to the wigs by letting them know they seriously fucked up their demographics and understanding of a product.

That means stop using the hashtags on prime media. Don’t #SPN or #Supernatural. Don’t even talk about SPN or Supernatural hashtag or not. Don’t engage them. Don’t argue with them. Don’t even complain about them. I know it’s really, really tempting, but on a marketing level /that shit still benefits them./

I know people think they’re making some kind of Statement(TM) by ranting on and on and on and fucking ON about Supernatural for years at a time, but it’s still engagement. All you really accomplish is getting relative keywords and ideas blacklisted alongside the shit you’re constantly bitching about. If they’re getting engagement and discussion (good) but it’s constantly attached to one group of people or idea that is starting to become too aggressive, that group is now a blacklist group.

I have been trying to teach people this for years but nobody has wanted to listen and kept digging fuckin’ holes. But maybe, just MAYBE, now that the show is over, you can stop.

Don’t tune into channels re-airing it.

Don’t stream any services. Cancel any related subscriptions.

Don’t look it up on youtube (yes, I’m aware that means even my channel will suffer), don’t watch reaction videos, don’t go to articles that talk about it.

Don’t even breathe about it. It doesn’t exist. 

If you absolutely MUST buy yourself a copy of it, go to places like second hand book stores that sell DVDs, because the resale doesn’t go to them but it’s still a legally purchased product.

Get everybody you know to do the same. Spread this by word of mouth on other platforms that DON’T benefit them in any way: tell your friends in discord to adopt the habit, tell your friends in DM.

As it is even tumblr isn’t *totally* useless to them for PR, it’s still engagement, it’s just not as... important? And this sentiment needs to be posted somewhere to get it out there, so it’s the best go.

I’ll tell you what *doesn’t* hurt them at all: people engaging the content, positive or negative, for all eternity. Congrats, you’re part of the PR machine.

All y’all really do, doing that, is hurt each other. And they don’t care.

Welcome to marketing. It’s machiavellian, but it’s how things work.

So if you actually plan to like. Make an impact instead of make noise. Actually just. Stop making noise. Entirely.

#pr #marketing #supernatural #spn #blackout

[seesgood]

can we very gently talk about call out posts / culture really quick?  not in a judgmental way, but in like a: i just want to pose a thought and explain why i’m never going to buy into it and why i wish it would become less of a trend instead of more of one? and i’ll add the  disclaimer  here: i totally get not wanting certain people around you for various reasons, that is all your prerogative. that’s your comfort level. but in emphasizing “your blog should be a safe space” we’re kind’ve losing sight of the fact that the rpc should also be a safe space, and as much as your comfort and safety matter, so do other people’s. and not just the person who hurt you, but the third parties and other mutuals and 99.9% of people who are not at all involved in any way in whatever happened. so, anyway here goes, read it or don’t, we all have different opinions or reasons, i just want to be heard:

people are allowed to change.  think back to who you were last year. two years ago. think about the stuff you said when you were seventeen, or twenty-one, or hell whatever age you were. current-you would probably cringe at the kind of stuff past-you had to say. because you grew. you learned. you had life experiences. in hindsight you have the freedom to be like “oof yeah that was not the best version of myself right there damn i don’t want to be like that again.” the growing trend of ‘here’s a 10+ page google doc complete with out of context screenshots that sometimes date back to like 2017 or earlier’ makes this kind of change impossible. because right there, you’ve just frozen a person in time, probably not at their best, removed any and all amounts of context, and put it on the internet and let other people judge it for themselves. 

so that leads into another point that i want to just kinda present to the community at large: the act of documenting behaviors and storing them for months / years at a time, in itself creates a super unsafe environment, not just for you, your friends, the people who have hurt you --- but also for anyone else that isn’t at all involved in whatever happened. like, for example, i like to think that i’m a pretty nice person. i actively try to be a nice person. am i sometimes not having the best day? have people definitely caught me in bad moments? oh hell yeah. but am i, as someone who tries really hard to be nice and welcoming, constantly thinking through every message i send to someone knowing that a) i could have a reputation that makes them read into context that isn’t there and that could contribute to them misinterpreting words i meant in a different way, b) very aware that every post i make, ask i send, message i send can at any moment be screenshotted and posted and taken out of context and either serve as someone’s only opinion of me or pile on to someone’s existing opinion of me? yeah. so in my experience, and based on people i’ve talked to, we now have this thing where you can be surface-friends wtih a lot of people, but if you want to survive in the tumblr rpc you should really only have 2-3 people that you really trust that you can actually talk about shit with. 

and lately i’ve been seeing a resurgence of posts on my dash about like “bring back xyz in the rpc” or “the reason the rpc is like this is because of xyz” and i both agree and disagree with a lot of this, but primarily i think the reason the rpc is Off lately is because everyone and their cousin has a DNI, which is --- again --- your decision and i understand and respect that, but while you know the context of every name on that DNI, other people don’t. and to be honest: other people don’t really care and honestly maybe they shouldn’t care. --- and don’t get me wrong, your friends should care if someone has hurt you. that’s important. but joe billy bob who just wants to write their character with yours is going to read through your rules, they’re going to see “do not interact with me if you follow with or interact with these people you’ve never heard of and if you want me to tell you why just message me” (which no one is ever going to do, i’m sorry to say). and say, joe billy bob also followed that other person because they were like ‘omg this blog looks cool’ --- now joe billy bob, who just wants to write cool plots, is suddenly the middle-man in some type of drama that they do not understand, and maybe they’re able to remove themselves from the situation, but even then it’s still in the back of your mind. 

this is getting long. it’ll be longer, but let’s take a brief break for me to remind you that in some cases, it’s definitely good to give your mutuals and friends a heads up when someone has done something really, really bad. like, remember x amount of years ago when some dude was like ‘i’m gonna make up a new person and say they died by suicide as a social experiment’ or ‘hey this person actively tries to force very triggering plots about abuse / rape / incest onto people and has been doing so for years and does not seem to change their ways no matter how many people try to educate them’ that’s shit people should probably know about. and it’s also okay ( in my opinion ) for your friends to be able to message you like ‘hey i saw you’re writing with x and i just wanted to let you know i had this experience with them’ if that’s something they feel comfortable doing. and if they are comfortable with you still having the autonomy to make your own decision regarding the person. 

i’ll be honest, for a second: i’ve been part of friendships and groups that have turned really toxic for one reason or another. a handful of times. there are probably people out there that are like “yeah this chick is really fake and manipulative and etc, i was friends with her back in 2019″ which, okay. yeah. i’ve definitely done shit and said shit that was not the most representative of who i want to be and who i want to become, and you probably have to. because we are human beings and we are a product of our social groups and the community around us. and you shouldn’t be chained to a version of you that isn’t you anymore. people change. they grow. you don’t have to like them, but you should respect that sometimes people don’t mesh, and that doesn’t mean any of them are bad people, it just means the experience was bad. 

a few additional notes i would like to make but i’ve already gone on way too long:

90% of the callout posts that i’ve seen and the DNI’s that i’ve seen can, in my opinion, be classified as a friend group thing. you were friends with x, x did something, now y and z aren’t friends with x anymore. pain is a very, very real thing and people hurting you should never be minimized, but at some point i just want you to remember that not every friendship is going to end happily, but both you and the other party should be allowed to move on and grow better, healthier friendships after. rehashing Friend Group Gone Wrong instances removes that ability for not only person x, but also person y and z.

you putting out a callout says just as much ( maybe more ) about you than it does about the other person. which sucks. because i’d like to think we all have great intentions, and i’m not saying that you should swallow your pain, but it might not be the kind of thing that impacts the community at large, and maybe you should try to find a better way of working through it with a trusted friend(s)

i’m going to be very real and very blunt on this one: literally no one cares. i say that with love. i’m good friends with people who have each other on their DNI’s. establish a baseline of respect and ‘i’m not going to say anything to them about you and vice versa because there’s no need for me to do so’ and move on. but seriously. no one cares. most outside people read callout posts because they like being in the know about the drama, not because they actually care. 

person a and person b who are mentioned in the DNI / callout aren’t the only ones who are going to be affected. your friends, your mutuals, your writing partners are now all put in a weird spot where you have to pick sides on an issue you know nothing about and shouldn’t have to know anything about. you’re asking people to choose sides on an issue they cannot fully understand, and that’s not fair to them or to you. and it drives great people away. and then we all lose out on having more awesome people in the rpc.

you’re entitled to your safe space, but this is a public platform and you are also responsible for maintaining your safe space. you shouldn’t put it entirely on other people to do that for you. you can block, blacklist, make up funny names for, or spitefully erase from your many anything and anyone that you wish. but you shouldn’t make your friends do it for you.

there’s always an inherent power imbalance when any kind of drama occurs between those who have more followers / friends / connections and those who do not. and the smaller blog is always going to suffer a little bit more because they don’t have people blindly coming to their defense. 

bad moments, bad experiences, bad decisions DO NOT equal bad people. 

allow people to make up their own mind about something or someone

anywho, if you read through this whole thing i think i owe you financial compensation. but also thank you for reading / listening / considering. even if you rolled your eyes through the whole thing like “stfu lia” that’s fine. i’m just presenting an alternative thought. i’d like to once again state: i’m not judging you if you’ve made a callout/DNI or if you’re on a callout/DNI. like i literally don’t care. and frankly, in my opinion, i shouldn’t have to. because i, and you, and your friends, and your mutuals, and your non-mutuals should be allowed the space to make up their own opinion and mind on something or someone without being told that there will be consequences if they don’t agree with you. set boundaries. communicate in healthy ways. you don’t have to forgive the people who have hurt or wronged you, but you also don’t get to decide that their actions make up 100% of who they are as a person, or decide that that is the only side of that person people should get to see. 

#ʟᴇᴛ’s ᴛᴀʟᴋ ɢʀᴏᴜɴᴅ ʀᴜʟᴇs ⸺ psa. #/ long post cw. #when i say long i mean LONG #i could do an entire dissertation on this #i could do a ted talk #but ys know #if anyone wanted to do some ahem non-light reading this morning #*jazz hands* #( if you want to reblog this monstrosity you definitely can )

[yoificfinder]

Hello! Thank you for the work you do. I've found so many awesome fics through your tumblr which made my life so much happier. I was wondering if you'd please share any fics you or others know where Victor or Yuuri experience a significant disability that is new and that they are adjusting to. Thank you!!!

Hello and you're welcome!

I interpreted your request as them being injured in canon (or at least a 'verse where they are skaters) and here are my recs:

A Practical Guide to Winning the Olympics (Do's and Don'ts) by Anna (arctic_grey) [E, 106K]

When pair skater Yuuri Katsuki’s career comes to a scandalous end, he does not expect the retired pair skating legend Viktor Nikiforov to suggest that they compete together. But taking on a new skating partner is full of trial and error, and the skating world doesn’t know how to react when the Katsuki-Nikiforov duo, against all odds, starts doing well. The last thing either of them should do, as they strive for their last chance at greatness, is to fall in love. Yuuri knows he is damaged goods, and Viktor knows his body is starting to fail him. They have competitions to survive and medals to win. No, falling in love is out of the question; they’re just very good friends. And even if Viktor felt something, he’d never act on it, and even if Yuuri happened to be hopelessly in love, he’d be mortified if Viktor ever found out.

“Well,” Viktor said, “let’s summarise: I’m pushing thirty, have a bad ankle, and haven’t skated competitively in three years. You’re barely out of a doping scandal, coachless, and on the JSF’s blacklist. Hell, Yuuri – we might as well go for it, then. What on earth do we have to lose?”

When Viktor put it like that, it seemed to make an awful lot of sense.

Dog People by stillmadaboutpetra [E, 94K]

“I’m feeling like you have a mail-order Russian boytoy sleeping in your bed.”

“Phichit! Don’t call him that,” Yuuri snaps, ears scorched and heart kicked into fury. “Vicchan isn’t a – only you would say something – he’s just – it’s not – it’s not like that. It’s definitely not like that!”

Phichit takes a delicate sip of his tea, blinking far too innocently at Yuuri. “Oh? My, what a reaction. Tell me, Yuuri, what is it like? Because the prettiest boy I’ve ever seen apparently crawls on his knees for you and begs for your attention.”

OR

Yuuri thinks he's being scammed when the guy he almost slept with quite literally throws himself at Yuuri's feet and begs.

Olympic gold medalist Victor Nikiforov is, instead, casually falling apart.

here comes a thought by @crossroadswrite [G, 7K]

Yuuri dreams about his last competition a lot. How could he not when it changed his life so viscerally.

In his dreams, it’s always falling. It’s never hitting the ground, because Yuuri knows what happens when he hits the ground – torn ACL, mild concussion and a nasty bruise on his head that had lasted for weeks. It’s never the pain he’s afraid of in his dreams, Yuuri’s well used to pain.

It’s the act of falling, the promise of pain and failure. It’s what falling means. It haunts Yuuri, even now when the bruise on his head is completely gone and his knee is slowly healing.

(Or: Yuuri struggles with being forced into retirement by an injury, Victor struggles with getting Yuuri to talk about it, and they still love each other through all of it.)

lonely two-legged creatures by @poodlesandsucculents [T, 70K]

In a world where Yuuko stopped the triplets from uploading Yuuri’s “Stammi Vicino” video, Yuuri never returns to skating, and instead builds a new life for himself in Hasetsu. Three years later, an injury forces Victor into retirement just before he turns 30. Desperate to crawl out of the depression he now finds himself in, Victor decides to take his first ever vacation, and shows up on the doorstep of the hot spring resort a very handsome drunk boy once told him about at a party. Then he sort of never leaves.

Perhaps we are halves of the same star by llythl [T, 8K] *WIP

He does not know how to say, "I was supposed to go to you."

He does not know how to say - "You should know me," - and there is an accusation in that one, but he is not sure who it blames.

Yuuri's injury pulls him from the fated GPF. But Victor finds him anyway - and fails to recognize him.

Canon-divergent: Where those who are meant to - find each other in the end.

Other recs are welcome!

#yoi #yuri on ice #victuuri #injury #yoi fic rec

[nctsworld]

to support the nct writeblr community, i’ve decided to host a writing challenge! all works will be reblogged onto my blog and added to this masterlist for this challenge. 

please read all the rules carefully and blacklist #nctsworldfwc for those who wish to avoid the content! 

RULES: 

you do not have to follow me, but i’m always appreciative of those who do! 

must reblog this post to participate (likes do not count) 

all fics must include and focus on at least one nct member (other groups as side characters are fine)

fics must only be reader fics (all genders welcome); no ships please

must use at least any one of the prompts under the cut (feel free to use multiple and mix and match) 

all genres are acceptable (fluff, angst, smut, crack, etc.), as long as you make use of at least one of the prompts

if you are writing smut, please be 18+ 

mention and tag trigger warnings as necessary 

timestamps and blurbs are acceptable, but minimum 300 words

no limit on word count, but if it’s over 500 words, you must use the read more function 

tag your works with #nctsworldfwc in order for me to reblog and support your work! you may also mention me and hope tumblr won’t hide the notification

may submit more than one fic, but only a maximum of three fic submissions are allowed

deadline will be march 31, 2021 (i will stop checking the tag after this date, but feel free to submit it after this date and i’ll try my best to reblog and update the masterlist)

if you have any questions or need clarification, please don’t hesitate to send in an ask or dm me!

PERSONAL NOTE: 

i will try my best to read every fic and give feedback! however, depending on how many will participate, it might just not be possible, but i promise (as long as you adhere to the above rules) to reblog and support your work! 

i may also rec some people’s works, and not other’s. please do not let that discourage you from writing! everyone has different opinions, but remember that just because i may not like it, there won’t be someone out there who loves it (insert the holy shit two cakes writing meme). 

the aim of this challenge is to inspire the community to write and to support and read each other’s works. 

have fun and i look forward to all your fics!!! 

PROMPTS 

tropes: 

best friends to lovers

enemies to lovers

friends with benefits to lovers

roommates to lovers 

fake relationship/dating 

one night stand

there is only one bed 

childhood friends

holiday romance (eg. christmas, summer vacation) 

au’s: 

bartender au 

boxer au

coffee shop au  

college au 

flower shop au 

harry potter au

marvel or dc au 

office au (eg. ceo, assistant, co-workers, etc.) 

royalty au 

soulmate au

spy au��

supernatural au (eg. vampires, ghosts, demons, etc.) 

tattoo artist au 

theme park au 

dialogue prompts: 

“are you serious right now?” 

“are you trying to kill me?” 

“because i love you, you idiot.” 

“can i kiss you?” 

“do it again, i dare you.” 

“don’t lie to me.” 

“hey, you awake?” 

“how much did you drink?” 

“i could do this all day.” 

“i needed you. i needed you!” 

“i never wanted anything to do with you to begin with.” 

“i want you now.” 

“i’m waiting.” 

“i’m usually not this desperate.” 

“is this even going anywhere?” 

“prove it.” 

“spend the night with me?” 

“stop lying to me!”

“that’s not fair.”  

“the bed is cold without you.” 

“try to stay quiet.” 

“wanna bet?” 

“what are you staring at?” “you.” 

“you owe me a kiss.” 

“you’re mine.” 

“your wish is my command.” 

artist prompts (can use any song from their discography):

ariana grande

doja cat 

harry styles

keshi

lany 

maroon 5 

nct (all units) 

taylor swift

tinashe 

troye sivan 

the weeknd

we the kings 

song prompts: 

body moves - dnce 

candy - baekhyun 

dream of you - chungha 

fancy - twice 

good kisser - usher 

i like me better - lauv 

little things - one direction 

lowkey - niki

make love make music - castlecomer 

strangers - jonas brothers 

thinking out loud - ed sheeran 

movie prompts: 

10 things i hate about you 

a cinderella story 

how to lose a guy in 10 days 

looks that kill 

notting hill 

set it up 

starstruck 

to all the boys i’ve loved before 

tagging potential interested peeps: (and b/c you’re like the only handful of writers i really know sldfmsd)

@hyuckles-chuckles​ @immabiteyou​ @jeongvision​ @notnctu​ @ppangjae​ @sehunniepot​ 

#cee.txt #nctsworldfwc #nct smut #nct fluff #nct angst #nct fanfic #nct scenarios #nct imagines #if this flops uh yeah we're gon do a good cover up of this cause this is gon be embarrassing sflkmdf #nctcreations

[iamnmbr3]

Apparently, people are unaware that Tom Hiddleston is one of the executive producers of the show. So he has a lot of say on how Loki is portrayed. People are going around this site like he is doing this show against his will with how mad some are.. He is doing a live asking on Tumblr on the 14th after the last episode airs, so you can ask him personally about why the show does things you don't like, lol. 😄

Tom is one of six executive producers on the show. Several of those other executive producers are senior Disney execs and one is Kevin Feige, so all of those people definitely have more say than Tom does. Based on what Mike Waldron, the head writer and show runner, has said in interviews it also seems that the story and script were developed by him with some input from some senior Disney execs and no involvement from Tom. The script and story were also developed before the much hyped “Loki lectures” which I think were really just hyped up by Disney to give fans hope. 

Tom himself has said in an interview that 95% of his ideas were not used and that most of what he advised on was Loki’s physicality. Also I would never dream of harassing any of the people involved in the production. Why would I ask a question like that? Also, it most certainly will not be a chance for that. 

The interview is to promote the show and Disney content. It’s not like Tom just decided to get on Tumblr. This is a scheduled appearance. They’re gonna make sure the questions and the answers make the show look good and help promote and sell their product. They’re certainly not gonna give honest answers that might be harmful to the reputation of the show or Disney. That would almost certainly be a breach of contract. It would also get Tom blacklisted in the industry because no one wants to hire an actor who’s gonna badmouth the studio or the production they’re working on.  

I don’t even know what I would ask at something like that because I don’t have anything positive to say about the show and I don’t want to ask about past movies that I enjoyed because I’m sure since he has to support the show’s interpretation of Loki any answer he gave would just further retcon Loki’s original characterization. Like already a lot of stuff Tom has said about Loki recently contradicts not only past characterization but even his own past interviews. Because he has to carry the new party line. So what’s the point of sending a question? 

#nice try anon #asks #loki tv series #loki show #loki 2021 #loki series #loki tv show

[roleplayerconfessions]

681189287211958272 Hell no. I'm not sitting back and letting you post that shit without consequences, and I'm in a big mood, so you're going to get the full lecture from me, congratulations. Listen here: asking someone to change their threads with me to simpler formatting might be fine if I didn’t follow them, but many roleplayers want to follow their rp partners. What the hell do you expect me to do about all their other posts with overformatting? Every overformatted PSA and meme? Every thread with their partners who overformat? Do you expect my partners to tag every single post for me? Do you expect me to blacklist every new url they start threading with? Do you expect me to constantly be on edge because maybe, just maybe, they'll forget to tag something one time, and I'll see something, and it will trigger an attack that leaves me out of commission for weeks? Unable to work? Can you imagine how massive my blacklist would need to be, and how often I would need to keep updating it? And even if I was okay with not following someone, what happens if I want to catch up on their new headcanons? I guess I'll have to bug them to paste all their posts for me on discord? What a mess! I'm always out of the loop, and that feels horrible. Sure, Jan, that’s not stressful or demoralizing at all.

I’ve asked people to tag everything before, because assholes like you have goaded me into thinking I should suck it up and communicate, and nobody wanted to honor it, because virtually every single post needed to be tagged. One mistake and it was migraine hell for me. I didn’t want to risk people forgetting, and they didn’t want to risk forgetting and being responsible for my attack. And what about all the blogs I see when I browse tumblr like normal? How many people have you seen actually tag for eye strain on their overformatted posts so someone can blacklist it? I count one blog, out of hundreds. I can’t even look at unknown blogs unless I have someone confirm that it's safe for me. I’ve had migraine from gifs people don’t think to tag, from fonts people don’t think to tag, from people I don’t even follow, even though I've taken every precaution tag-wise. Gee, you wonder why people are frustrated with the formatting bullshit, and now only follow people who, like them, couldn't ever imagine formatting like that, or having it on their blog at all. Asking someone to only change my threads with them does dick. And you know how frustrating it is to constantly be reminded that almost everyone in the RPC doesn't give a rat's ass about you, because if they did, they would at least put an eye strain tw at the top of their blog for people like me? "Not many people have migraine", you might say. Guess what? 30% or more of the American population is estimated to have migraine, 1 in 5 women and 1 in 6 men, and that's only the people who have come forward about it. 148 million people worldwide.

Great, you have a sight impairment, you can’t fucking see things well. Maybe you can risk seeing a post because the biggest consequence for you is sore eyes and a headache if you force yourself to stare at it and strain to read. You're not the universal example of accessibility or disability. I’m not going to risk feeling like I’m dying and wanting to take a jackhammer to my skull when I see a post briefly. Migraines aren't "just headaches" either, so if you think I can just pop off an Advil to get rid of it, do I have fucking news for you. There are support lines for people with migraine because depression (and worse) is sky high, they are hard to treat if not impossible, and the management options suck. Half the time, they don't even work. You clearly don’t realize how little it takes to set off a debilitating attack that can leave me in pain for days, if not months. An attack that can leave someone in severe pain (icepick headache), unable to move (hemiplegia), unable to see (visual aura), unable to speak or communicate (aphasia, like what is happening to Bruce Willis), unable to be in light areas (photophobia), with ringing ears (tinnitus), nauseous out of their damn mind, with digestive issues, and almost useless from brain exhaustion and fatigue for weeks after the initial attack (postdrome), and I guarantee it can take a lot less effort to trigger that, than whatever happens to you because you're "losing your vision". You don't know what it's like to be in public, see some flashing shit on your phone, start getting aura, and realizing you have about thirty minutes to get your ass home or else you're in deep shit. I know for a fact if you were in my shoes, you wouldn't be such a prick. The amount of ableism and ignorance in your post made my eyes roll right out of my head, and I don't think they're coming back, they're in outer space now. I say this with great feeling: sit your ass down and shut up.

In response to this submission.

#Submission Replies #Muns #Accessibility #Formatting #Tagging #Triggers #Partners #Coarse Language #Self Harm Mention CW

[a-lil-perspective]

I have been silent for some time now. I have refrained from exhibiting any plaguing thoughts that might warrant me the label of “that person”, but I’m at the point where I’ve had my fill.

Ramble under the cut so as to not... offend or inconvenience anyone. There’s absolutely no obligation to read this. It’s Tumblr. You can block/ignore me. The option to do so is readily accessible.

I’ve been a Bad Batch fan since day one. While I didn’t start creating that very same day, it was relatively close. Point being, I’m a long-time dedicated fan. As the premiere to their series draws closer, I feel like there is going to be a great shift, rift here. That being said, I figured now is as good a time as any to make this post.

I love those boys beyond words. They’ve been the one constant in my life amidst a rapid and debilitating change. I love getting to give them life, even if my interpretations aren’t the most accurate.

Yes, I am a new Writer and yes, I am new to Tumblr, as I am sure both of those things are painfully apparent.

I get that it is impossible to please everyone. It’s something I’m learning more and more with each passing day. It’s something that gets harder to swallow, even more so.

I’d like to say that being here has been a largely positive experience, with all of these great connections and opportunities. But honestly? It’s been more isolating than anything. I’ve actually never felt more isolated than since I joined a year ago.

As a content creator or even just a general blogger, I don’t ask for much. I don’t ask for anything, in fact. I consider myself very low maintenance. I don’t demand/harass/play the martyr for reblogs. I have never mentioned it once, and never will. Some people on here are so damn passive-aggressive about it, and quite frankly, it’s embarrassing. It’s very stigmatizing. While I completely understand the frustration surrounding the like-to-reblog ratio, I think it’s neither tasteful nor reputable to threaten to call people out for not reblogging your fics. I wish I could say I was joking on that one. But I’ve seen it profoundly. Not cool.

And yet, no one says anything or raises any concern there.

Yet I make metas, harmless rambles, and I get shot down? Seriously?

—I need to “chill”, it’s “overkill”, I’m “overthinking”. I and my content are apparently just so damn arduous to interact with.

If you don’t like me, please just move on. There are plenty of other Bad Batch creators for you to enjoy. You know that. My work is absolutely not the final say, and I’ve never claimed it to be.

What is so wrong, with sharing one’s thoughts? Why do people inherently have a problem with other’s creative efforts? I see it time over again. Why do I feel like if I was making a bunch of smutty posts it wouldn’t be as much of a problem, that it in fact would be infinitely more welcome? (Absolutely NO shade to people who create smut, okay? I’ve made my own share. I admire those bold enough to do so regularly. I absolutely love them. Please teach me your ways).

This ramble really has nothing to do with the most recent event regarding my contributions. Rather, it’s a culmination of experiences over the past several months that have brewed and festered to the point where I can no longer keep downplaying it.

Social media, at its core, is one big popularity contest. It always has been, it always will be. But I’m not here to win. That’s never been my objective. That’s not what I’m about. Surprise (or not), I am not a popular blog. Not by a long shot. I’ll never claim otherwise.

I don’t ask people to view/interact with my content, I’m not an activist, I can’t even fathom exuding that kind of confidence. Even though I, admittedly, crave it. I suspect I crave interaction as much as the next creator. It’s a nice feeling. Yet there’s never been any obligation for it, especially with me, so I don’t understand what the problem is. As I’ve said, there are ample ways for you to block/avoid me. It’s the internet. In this day and age, there’s no excuse for viewing anything you don’t want to.

I came here in the hopes of finding like-minded individuals, uplifting and interacting, and exercising some otherwise stunted creativity.

All Tumblr as taught me is that creating and contributing is largely a thankless, empty endeavor. You can give and give and give and be reduced to nothing. There’s a profound imbalance between “giving” and “receiving”, and in regards to both ends of the scale, it’s became apparent to me that if you don’t cater heavily and in unreasonable degrees or get “noticed” by a popular blog, you get nothing, and your efforts are null and void.

Truthfully? I constantly feel like I walk on eggshells here, and it’s all I can do to not crack under the pressure, even though it’s my blog and my headspace. I should feel comfortable and free to express myself here, and I don’t, and I’m unsure of how to achieve that sense of stability. To be completely honestly I feel like a constant bother and a nuisance. When I post, I literally feel like there is a collective eye-roll that comes with people receiving a notification from my blog. Even though I know, rationally, that can’t be true, that’s an absurd level of thinking. I can’t say I can pinpoint exactly where it stems from.

But regardless: I hardly ever talk about/create the things I actually want. I only recently just got ballsy enough to share some metas, and we all know how well that’s going. I try not to have smut out of respect for my asexual/minor mutuals, even though the tag to blacklist is very much an option. I try not to bring up conflicting topics, Tumblr, political, or otherwise, even though with proper tagging I could. But I try not to even bring that into existence. Even though it’s my right to, I don’t.

I don’t actually feel like I fit into any narrative here, especially in the Bad Batch fandom; even though we are all basically the same steadfast group of bloggers. We all know who we are. We all coexist in the same space. It’s nearly impossible to be unaware of each other, at this point.

And yet, I’m not in a bunch of Discord servers or backed by a team of beta readers and all that jazz. It’s basically just me talking to myself out here. It’s very isolating.

Part of that—most of it—is my own crippling social anxiety, and the genuine belief that I don’t deserve to be in the same space/servers as all of these brilliant creators. Because I’m just me, and there’s not a whole lot of value there. With that mindset, it’s hard to actually feel like I belong anywhere. I know that is a mindset I have to conquer alone.

My excitement over my creations has largely dwindled into nothing. I seldom ever bounce my ideas off of others—another issue that stems from the fear of presenting as a burden—and even though I try to write for myself, even that fire has pretty much died out. I’m not even sure how or if I could even reignite it, at this point. It’s really quite sad. It makes me very sad, actually. All I wanted was to safely ramble, project all my thoughts and creativity that has otherwise been repressed through prolonged detrimental circumstances.

More than anything, I wanted to find and hold onto something that makes me feel useful, meaningful, happy. More and more I wonder if that’s even possible. I don’t think it is, not here. I often wonder if joining and sharing on Tumblr was a horrible mistake. I miss the innocent joy of when I first started creating. It was so simple. I’m trying to find that simplicity again.

But I’m burned out. I’m running on fumes. I have been for some time.

At this point it goes beyond just “taking a break” from Tumblr. It’s the fact that it all feels like this meaningless, monotonous cycle. I wonder every day if I am an isolated case in experiencing these emotions.

And yet, come tomorrow I will still be here, business as usual.

I’m not asking for sympathy or playing the victim or attacking anyone or trying to guilt-trip into more interaction. I am very aware of my shortcomings and incorrect mindsets. I’m just trying to make sense of it all. I feel very disconnected from everyone here and it’s lonely. This took a lot for me to share. I will most likely delete this because anxiety will eat me up, as it does with everything I post. Yes, everything.

#personal #lil rambles

[rpbetter]

"writes dubcon therefore is a freak who should be bullied off the site" ho boy i'm fed up with people acting as if consenting adults writing [insert "problematic" fictional thing here] is the worst thing in the world. seen way too many people justifying harrassment of REAL PEOPLE by "they write thing that triggers me". ok, and? mute the tags or don't follow! "it triggers someone" is not a valid reason to ban a topic. piano music triggers me yet i don't go around demanding everyone stop playing the piano.

Anon, not only is everything you said absolutely valid, but also, thank you for demonstrating that triggers are incredibly varied and as such, we cannot predict everyone's triggers. Making the entire "point" of banning for possible triggers invalidated as hell.

We should be aware of things like the most commonly occurring phobias (things like arachnophobia and coulrophobia that are, additionally, easily triggered by imagery) and tag them. We should be aware of very obvious triggers, that are, again, easily set off by imagery, like blood, eye trauma, and depictions of domestic violence. And we should always read and be aware of our writing partners' stated triggers so that we can tag them appropriately or even decide that it isn't going to work because our muse, canon story, or interests are going to present an unfair situation in this partnership.

But triggers can be highly unusual, as well as activated differently (even at different times) for everyone. I'm not triggered by seeing hotel rooms in pictures or movies, I'm not triggered by writing scenes that take place in them, but I'm triggered to some degree by being in one. It's outrageous oversimplification to act like all triggers are the same, they all display the same way, they're all going to trigger someone on the same basis, everyone's going to react the same to their triggers. There is absolutely no way to prevent 100% of possible triggers for 100% of the population, 100% of the time.

Add to this that way too many people trivialize triggers by throwing around that term to justify the banning of something that makes them uncomfortable or that they take a personal, moral issue with. "I don't like this" and "I'm grossed out by this" and "this makes me feel uncomfortable" is not being triggered. It's just a good way to weaponize the better nature of other people so that they comply.

Most people legitimately do not want to trigger someone, especially if they have triggers and know what it's like. Just like no one wants to be accused of cruelty towards trauma survivors in general, or be designated a pedo, rape apologist, or fascist. They're all things to weaponize in order to isolate, shame, and control. And that's really fucking gross. These are serious, real things that have no business being trivialized to police content, win internet arguments, or garner popularity.

The potential for someone to be triggered isn't a reason to ban anything; we have tags, we have blacklist.

While I'll be the first to say that tumblr's blacklisting can be as shitty as everything else on the site, the primary issue with running into content you don't want to see comes down to two factors: no one tagging/tagging correctly and actively exposing yourself to that content. Going through people's properly done tags and blog warnings about their content in order to "call it out" is actively exposing yourself by choice. You actual walnuts.

Calling people on on their "problematic" content is bringing those topics to the attention of other people. That's the whole point of this gross behavior: look at the freak pedo abuse apologist I found, they write dubcon!! Don't look if you'll be triggered uwu

Buddy, pal, my guy...you just put that on blast for anyone to run across. Maybe their blacklist catches those words in your callout post, maybe it doesn't. Maybe they think you're a safe space because you promote yourself that way, so they click it anyway. Point is, you just willfully and irresponsibly exposed people because it's more important to you to demonize a rando on tumblr RPing something you take issue with. Good job!

Furthermore, dubcon itself is such a hilarious issue to take. Do they realize that isn't always sexual, or? Not? I'm thinking not. Funnily enough, one of the oldest posts I've been working on for this blog is about exactly this topic, the myriad situations that are dubious consent. That doesn't have to be sexual, and neither does it have to be intentionally predatory. You can come up with some amazing character development with a lot of muses in the RPC with dubcon because almost everyone's muse has some manner of trauma that might negate their perception of their own consent...and what do you do then? Is it removing more agency from that muse to shut them down, or is that always the better option? Can you separate your opinion as the mun from your muse's natural reactions? How does this impact the muses involved not just that moment but the next year?

Point is, dubcon isn't always some rapey situation. Even if it was, even if someone is writing it that way, it's literally not your business or your problem.

There's one mutual-in-law on my RP blog that really bothers me. They write things that I find fetishizing, incredibly rapey, all around shit that bothers me. I don't want to see it, some of the things they write makes my damn skin crawl. This person doesn't know it, we certainly don't speak and I don't think they like me very much, but I've repeatedly defended their right, specifically their right as a person with some long-term callouts on them, to write what they want to. I have them blocked and their urls blacklisted so I never have to see my mutual reblogging their threads. It's not a problem because I don't click "show anyway." Why would I, if it genuinely bothers me so much?

That's how you handle things that bother you; you use the tools available to not interact even by accident. Not by launching a morality crusade.

If any of us want to write what we enjoy, we have to allow others that same freedom. It's always a matter of time before this policing grows to include more and more topics, it's been used multiple times to get well-meaning people who don't fall into the general demographics to police queer, BIPOC, and other marginalized groups off of platforms. We've been fortunate in most of the RPC that it implodes on itself before it gets all the way there, but even so, you can see it.

It starts with things that produce a visceral reaction in the great majority of people, positions this with a repeatedly condemned idea presented as solid fact that fiction is reality, and you've got the start of something awful. Today it's something you don't like, maybe even something that triggers you, so you either support it or you quietly allow it to happen. Who needs to write that "freak shit" anyway, can't they just be gross privately? Six months from now, it's something "problematic" that you enjoy like violence that's canon-typical for your muse, or your OTP because they're gay and that's fetishizing, they're cis male and female but one or both is bi and that's bad representation, or they canonically have a rocky relationship so that's romanticizing toxic/abusive relationships.

If you can't care for any other reason, you really should care about how it is going to impact you sooner or later. In an environment like this, you can stay in your space, put warnings on your blog, and tag properly and you're still going to get a callout if the wrong person finds your blog. Just takes a single person with more time, energy, and skewed ideas of justice than they have reading comprehension or common sense.

Again, I cannot encourage people enough to give warnings, but it's difficult to ignore why those warnings are slipping; they're a way to be found, designated as a Problem, and called out. Look, it's another reason why callouts actually make things worse, not better! People put that shit in their rules so you can avoid content, they're being responsible and interested in promoting a safe RPC. Let them do it, damn.

You can't tag everything, and if you've never experienced what a giant series of repetitive tags is like on a screenreader you probably should before you tag seven paragraphs of possible issues. You can tag for visuals, you can tag for the obvious things, and you can tag for what's in the rules you agreed to when you followed/followed back. But you should also warn people that you write "dark topics" on the tin, and expand on that in your rules for specific things like graphic violence, toxic relationships, dubon, and addiction.

That's how responsible adults, not over-aged children, make better decisions about their mental health and general comfort. Not by appointing themselves the watchdogs of the damn RPC, here to protect you whether you want to be or not, find that incredibly insulting or not when you're in one of their categories of people who must be protected, by forcibly banning Problematic Everything. Problematic, of course, being entirely in the eye of the content police.

It's fiction. No one and nothing real was harmed. It's great that you are so invested in the fictional world and people that make you happy, but take a fucking big step back into reality. The real people you're harming with your bullshit had every right to peaceably exist. If what they're writing is triggering to you, stay. away. from. it.

Without any coincidence whatsoever, that's how you get from the base-point of Problematic Material to Problematic Mun. Yeah, it's just fiction, it's just RP, but I also took something out of context OOC or was upset by their tone on their own blog or couldn't exercise the minimal adult logic to remove myself from their presence OOC as well. So, now, you've got OOC behavior being added to the callout, if it wasn't already. Everyone is now ableist, transphobic, racist, and a misogynist because it lends that visceral reaction to the callout and ups the game from just being "y'all so gross you aged up a cartoon character to ship" to "this is REAL and it won't be tolerated! OP is actually a pedophile, they told a sexual joke in a discord server with a minor present and I have the receipts!"

What are the most storied callouts in the entire RPC? I'm absolutely certain the same names came to mind no matter what fandoms you're in, and one of them was "Matt." Another was probably "Ares/Snow". They're all successful and keep being brought up out of the closet anytime people are bored enough because their primary punch is the mun themselves being a predatory threat to the community. The mun is verified to be a bad person. Well, of course, that's got to be repeated, it worked. (Even if it did not, at all, work and only made it harder for people to avoid any of these muns.)

Are there people in the RPC who are legitimately a problem? Absolutely, yes. We're all supposed to be adults, however. Part of being an adult is having and acting upon one's agency. If someone is coercing you into things you are not comfortable with, shut it down. If you have difficulties being certain of those situations, run it by a trusted, honest friend or available, impartial source in the RPC for a second opinion. If you can't handle any manner of confrontation, there really are situations in which it's perfectly alright to block someone without any discussion. It's just the internet, you're in control of your space. Own it.

Minors are a whole other can of fucked up worms I'm not even getting into right now except to say that because a minor exists in a space they were told to stay out of does not mean we ban all topics inappropriate for their consumption.

tl;dr: banning shit doesn't work anyway, the whole idea is predicated upon some incredibly problematic takes IRL, and no, there's no justification for it outside of intense personal problems with one's own importance. That energy would be infinitely better spent volunteering one's time to help real people in crisis or after surviving one, or even oneself in developing some healthier approaches and thought patterns.

#hey what if we all start saying we're triggered by callout culture is that bannable then lmao #vespertine #drama cw #bsnf #callout culture #tumblr rpc #rp problems #also thank you again anon I hope you're having a great day!

[crushpdf]

Tumblr Etiquette Masterpost

Hi! Because I have (1) anxiety (2) been on tumblr for more than a decade, I have assumed the incredibly narcissistic position of making a post about how to interact with people on tumblr, since I think I’ve mastered the basic rules.

UPDATE: I started drafting this post a while ago. I'm not calling anyone out. I mostly made this because I realized I had a shocking number of followers who are new to tumblr.

In this post I’m covering Asks + Anons, Reblogging + Liking, Following, Tags, and ~Making Friends~.

TL;DR: tumblr etiquette is about social norms. These are the norms I have observed in my time here. You’re free to blog as you choose, but tumblr is a happier place when everybody is following the same guidelines.

Yes I use the words like “have to” or “rule” in this post. No, none of these are actual rules. Do what you want, but be prepared to face disgruntled users.

Let’s get started!

All About Following 

Rule #1: You do not have to follow anybody you don’t want to. You do not need to let someone follow you if you don’t want to.

Tumblr is technically a social media site. If you want to grow your social circle, follow your mutuals’ mutuals. The internet is like real life. You do a Group Hang, and then eventually you get to the one-on-one friendship. (Please refer back to Rule #1)

Some of your mutual-in-laws might feel slighted if you follow everyone except them. That’s okay. (Please refer back to Rule #1) You might feel slighted if you’re the one not being followed. That’s okay. (Please refer back to Rule #1)

Tumblr is technically a social media site, but it’s also a place to see the content you like, not just the people you like. You can be friendly with people you don’t follow, or who don’t follow you. Some users are amazing people who just post the wrong content. That’s okay.

If someone posts content you don’t like, unfollow them. If you don’t like someone’s personality, unfollow them. Don’t be an asshole, don’t hate-follow, and don’t stress yourself out.

Asks, Anons, Messages

I tried to organize my thoughts into paragraphs. I really did. But talking to people on tumblr is messy if you do it wrong, and I’m just going to bullet-point some etiquette guidelines.

Rule #1: You do not have to answer any messages you don’t want to.

Your 500 word message should not be the first time a user sees your name

.....Before you get Venting Privileges, a user should recognize you from the tags you leave on their posts, or the comments you leave on their fic, or the other shorter messages you’ve sent them, or from being mutual-in-laws, literally whatever. But it’s Not Cool to dump things on people who don’t even know you.

The anon button should be used in two scenarios only:

.....1, to send a positive message. Not neutral! Positive message, the kind of message you send with heart emojis.

.....2, if you don’t want to admit personal information about yourself. The Venting Privileges Rule still applies even if you’re on anon (ie: you can’t vent! Because they don’t recognize your username!) and “personal information” does not include unpopular opinions. I’m talking messages like “Saw your post about living in Houston, and I agree!”

.....(Okay, three scenarios: if someone specifically asks for anons for an ask game or something!)

If you don’t want it posted publicly, don’t send it over an ask. Send it as a DM. You can always kindly request that the recipient doesn’t publish it, but typical tumblr etiquette is that asks get published by default.

Personally, if I follow someone back I like to introduce myself! Many of these conversations end after the “hi” stage, and I never force friendship upon someone. But many of these conversations also work as ice breakers, and make it easier to send the second message, and the third. Don’t worry that you’re being rude if you don’t do this—it’s also totally normal to just keep blogging as usual!—but it’s helpful in making friends.

If you reblog an ask game from someone, it’s just common courtesy to send them an ask of your own.

Tags, Blacklists

Rule #1: You do not need to use any tags you don’t want to.

(Are you sensing a theme? But this one gets a...)

But, be prepared to face disgruntled followers over this.

Tags are useful in so many ways. They’re a great place to organize posts so you can find them more easily later on! They’re a great place to show off your personality! They’re a great (and quiet! More on this later) place to show appreciation for content creators.

They’re also so incredibly helpful for your followers to avoid content they don’t want to see. If you’re delving into a new fandom and are about to reblog twenty posts in a row, tag it. If you’re liveblogging a movie, tag it. If your post (especially your photo posts) contains any common phobias or unpleasant things (gore, spiders, etc) tag it. And if one of your followers asks you to tag certain content, even if you don’t really understand why? Tag it, or else expect to lose that follower.*

*This isn’t about your follower count, btw. This is about being a decent person.

On the other hand, use blacklists and filtering liberally! If a user does tag their content, you have no right to complain about their posting it. Just filter it.

Reblogs, Likes, Comments

Tumblr is a blogging site. It functions on reblogged posts. That’s just how it works. This is not one of those sites where you scroll for hours clicking the like button.

Here are what likes are for:

Showing support for someone’s personal posts

Showing appreciation for someone’s tags

Admiring content that doesn’t exactly align with your blog (different fandom, inappropriate, whatever.)

Saving a post to find later

Showing double the love!

Here is where likes are most disappointing:

The original fic, artwork, or edits of your fellow tumblr users, especially in your fandom

(If you’re someone who regularly reblogs things, I’m not talking to you. You’re allowed to simply “like” posts. I’m talking to those users in my notifications that, day after day, like 35 of my posts and reblog exactly 1 of them.

Just reblog shit.)

Also, remember how I said you can quietly show appreciation in the tags? Only comment directly on a post if you are sure you’re adding something worthy to the post. If you’re just saying “haha me too!” or “I remember this!” just leave it in the tags. (Reminder! You can do what you want! It’s your blog and I’m not the police! I’m just teaching you etiquette! And the polite thing to do is to leave personal commentary in the tags!)

Let’s recap:

Aaaaand: Making Friends

Start small. Introduce yourself after you have mutually followed each other.

Leave nice things in people’s tags. They notice.

Send ask game messages.

Show off more of your personality. This isn’t a one way street!

.....You can do this by, well, reblogging things. Also by tagging things. Also by just making original posts.

Do not go zero to one hundred. You wouldn’t sit next to someone in class and start talking about your trauma (even if you heard that they share your own!). So don’t do it online.

Like people’s vent posts, and their asks, and their tag games. Reply to them, too.

Honestly? Do more tag games! If someone says “anyone can do this and say I tagged you” take them up on the offer! Tag other people you want to get to know more.

Last but not least, you do not owe anyone anything on tumblr, and no one owes you anything. Ignore the rude message. Block the annoying tag. Follow the users you like even if they don’t follow you back. Do not tell people to post more of X. Do not tell them to post less of Y. Do not ask them why they don’t follow you.

It’s so much easier to press the unfollow button than to be a dick.

#i have zero idea how to tag so i will just say #masterpost

[comfy-whumpee]

Whumping Safely 101

Many people in this community have mental health problems, face various types of discrimination, and have complicated relationships with some parts or types of whump. In particular, I aim this at people who care about the experience of survivors and others with triggers – partially because I am an abuse survivor who often flirts with triggering content as part of my love of whump.

Keeping your blog safe is difficult, takes effort, and is never a perfect process. But as the community grows and grows, it’s really important that we hold ourselves to a high standard. I would argue that this is a responsibility of all content creators, but especially those of us in the messy playground of whump.

I’ve got three sections in here: content warnings, writing with care, and community interaction. I’ve tried to make it navigable. It’s about 1.8k words. Shorter than a lot of drabbles! I welcome good-faith criticism on this topic and further questions on my own views.

Content Warnings

The biggest responsibility, in my opinion, is empowering your reader to make their own decision on whether they want to expose themselves to your writing. This also happens to be by far the easiest way to help people whump safely.

What to warn

This is a big and ever-changing topic. Some things you should warn for as a rule of thumb are anything NSFW, pet whump and box boy whump, drugs and alcohol, medical and hospital content, graphic gore, intimate partner violence, and animal harm. It can be tricky to draw the line of what counts – what needs a warning? If you’re in doubt, just warn it anyway. It doesn’t hurt.

If someone requests a trigger be warned for, even if it’s something that feels obscure or tame, show compassion and agree to the request. This is someone who cares enough about being able to read your writing that they wrote in! They want to be able to read it and enjoy it. You’re being complimented.

Otherwise, look at what other blogs tag for. You’ll see some variation in styles and levels of detail, but it’s a good way to gauge what people think is warn-worthy, when we’re often writing stuff that would already be R-rated in mainstream media.

Read Mores

The easiest way to make sure people don’t see your triggering content is to use a cut. Tumblr is not a very functional website and likes to delete cuts, but a cursory check of your posted content will usually tell you whether it’s worked. With asks, cuts are very spotty, so don’t be afraid to post an ask response separately with a screengrab of the original question. People often then respond to the ask itself with a link to the post, especially if it’s a whole drabble. Tumblr is weird and bad so just do your best.

Content notices

I.e., a quick summary before the drabble, usually in bold, to state what will be coming. I like to distinguish between using content notes (CN) and trigger warnings (TW) to indicate severity. Others might use the old phrase ‘dead dove do not eat’ to indicate this is a heavy piece, and often you will see qualifiers like ‘intense’, ‘mild’, ‘mention’, ‘referenced’ (i.e. it is discussed but not actively happening), and ‘implied’ (as the opposite of ‘explicit’). I’ve also seen a couple of people use ‘vibes’, which is a really nice way of demonstrating that it’s there, but not the focus. A quick paragraph like this, or just a line, lets people make a quick risk assessment on their reading.

This is also important if you’re sending in asks or requests to people. If you want to ask about something triggering, send an inquiry first about whether the blog is okay to hear it.

Tagging

Tagging is a chore, but it’s your primary way of warning people about your content. The main benefit of tagging is that you can be as detailed as you want, because can be tagging for content in general, not just triggers.

In a best case scenario, you’d tag the kind of whump you’re doing, tag triggers, tag characters, and even your ‘verses, because tagging is your index for your blog. If you tag reliably, you help your future self and your readers find stuff, and you also make your blog really dang safe. People who have unusual triggers can blacklist tags, and will pick up on your content tags to help them.

Don’t just tag your own writing. Tag your reblogs, tag your prompts, tag your asks. Yes, edit your asks to add the tags. Tag your images and gifs. Tag your images as images and your gifs as gifs.

If you aren’t up for detailed tagging for whatever reason, just tag for triggering content, and add stuff to that list if you’re asked to. My usual technique is to make a mental note of tags while I’m formatting and editing before posting.

Be aware that your first five tags will be used in search results. If you’re using tags that are associated with kink too, such as ‘shibari’, you might want to rethink your tag order if you don’t want interaction from those blogs. Also think about what tags might come up in non-whump contexts, such as ‘collar’ or ‘PTSD’. Some tactics for getting around this I’ve seen are adding ‘whump’ after the content or writing the tags in past tense (i.e., ‘collared’).

It is also a good idea to watch out for when you might be reblogging something whumpy that is intended as kink / porn / fetish, especially in images. Tagging these as spicy / nsfw / kink is a sensible move.

Writing with Care

Okay, now for the harder stuff.

I mean here to lay out some guidelines for how to write in a way that helps your reader build good faith. This is a much more nuanced topic, and it’s different for everyone. There will always be differing opinions on what should and shouldn’t be written about, what a good depiction of a sensitive topic is, and how to discuss that topic. I tried to strip this back into absolute basics that I hope we can all agree on.

Maybe your whump involves abuse. Maybe it’s gaslighting. Maybe it’s severe mental health problems, or addiction, or slavery, or you write about or analogise real-world issues. Whump deals with the dark stuff, and that’s a big part of its appeal. But don’t ever forget you’re writing the dark stuff.

(Try to) Know what you’re doing

Some of us play fast and loose with plots, medical accuracy, worldbuilding, and other things that get in the way of the pain we crave. This is all well and good, but when we start using whump that speaks true to people’s lived experiences, we shouldn’t be careless with it. I’m particularly talking about things that get represented poorly in mainstream media, such as abusive relationships, issues around marginalisation, mental illness and disability.

Be critical of media that you’ve consumed. Think about how its depicted things that you want to depict in turn. Look for opinions on fictional representations of those issues. Be aware that you might be more ignorant of things than you realise.

Look at how others are writing these issues, particularly if they’re writing from a perspective different to yours. If you haven’t personally experienced what you’re writing about, e.g., if you don’t have PTSD and you want to depict a character who does, seek out stuff written from or with experience. Listen to the experts.

If you’re looking for stuff about representation specifically, I recommend this collection of posts about ‘Braving Diversity’ cultivated by Writing With Colour, who are in themselves a fantastic resource for this topic, and have recommendations for other blogs that deal with intersecting issues.

Listen to others

Missteps are inevitable. Nobody is perfect. If constructive criticism is offered, that’s also a compliment to your writing. Someone read your work and thought about it, and thought you’d care about improving it. They’re offering themselves as a resource for helping you see your work in a new light.

Criticism is hard and sometimes hurtful, but even if we don’t think it’s accurate, there’s often a grain of truth in it. If someone tells you that your writing is harmful, think about why they’ve said that, not whether or not they’re correct. This is an opinion! Opinions are subjective! But what drove someone to send that in?

You don’t have to respond to all your criticism and definitely don’t respond straight away. Being respectful to those who are trying to help you means taking the time to consider it properly. Sometimes, they don’t need a response. Others, you might want to learn more about what they think before deciding. You might have already discussed the topic, in which case, you might just want to reblog your previous posts.

If it’s sent in bad faith or is outright hateful, you’re well within your rights to just delete it and move on. You might get the same criticism over and over again, and that’s exhausting, and you don’t have to retrace your steps for everyone.

But if it’s new, even if it puts your hackles up, you can always stop and wonder why someone felt that strongly about your work.

Take a step back

One of my better-known characters is a pet whumper who conditioned his victim to adore and depend on him. It’s not always easy to represent how deeply messed up that is within the text – though I think that’s part of the challenge – but in meta-commentary, I am always describing him as a creeptastic bastard lacking compassion and self-reflection. I hope to always give the reader the confidence that I know just how wrong it is.

This is a really simple thing you can do just to give readers good faith in you. Show that you know what you’re writing is dark and messed up. Show your understanding for the issues you’re handling and that they’re complicated. It might seem self-evident, but when you’re writing the really dark stuff, or unhealthy relationships, or institutionalised whump, you can inadvertently create the impression that you just think it’s fun. The fact that it’s fiction does not automatically absolve you. Show that you care about doing it right.

Community Interaction

I’m going to keep this one short and sweet because I will almost entirely be preaching to the choir here.

Be polite to others. Imagine saying what you’re saying to their face.

Don’t send anon hate. Just don’t. If you can send criticism off anon, do so.

Nobody is obligated to interact with you.

Nobody is obligated to monitor their own reader base.

If someone says do not interact, do not interact.

If someone says do not interact, why they’ve said that is none of your business.

You don’t need to spread the word about someone’s bad politics.

Ask yourself if your input is needed, or if what you’ve said has already been said.

You don’t have to take a side.

Take care of yourself. Take breaks. Remind yourself that whump is a small part of the world.

That’s all from me, folks. Stay safe.

#discourse...adjacent? #whump community #whump etiquette