clara becoming the doctor made them incompatible. they became one person as every lover wants but it tore them apart. ended their ability to coexist. they couldn’t survive as one. as the hybrid. they were monstrous. but for a brief time they got to fuse themselves together. exist as one entity. they got everything they ever wanted and it broke them but even then. even then. they still didn’t get to kiss. would it have meant anything at that point? were they beyond that? or were they still denying themselves it? was the hybrid that dangerous even without them completely completely giving in to each other?? was there still further love to be reached??? either way. just insane. no one’s doing tragedy like them
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Okay, I know that I put up a post speculating about how Chris would interact with Marisol, but rewatching his conversation with Buck is making me think of a possible avenue the show could go with his feelings on Eddie and Marisol's relationship.
Earlier, I said that that I saw Chris being distant with Marisol and not making an active effort in getting to know her because her being with Eddie meant that they'd be seeing Buck less. But now? What if Chris still ends up being distant and not trying to form a connection with Marisol, not necessarily because he hates the relationship...
But because he's just waiting for her to walk out just like his mom did with him and Eddie.
And as much as I hate seeing Chris be hurt, Marisol leaving is necessary.
Because she's gonna be the last person to leave.
And Buck is gonna be the first person to actually stay.
I really hope this made sense.
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just had a horrifying vision that after trackerbees break up kristen ends up living in Gilear’s old garage bedroom in the Seacaster manor 😭
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(Context: im thinking abt my post canon au, i explained on my ao3, u dont even have to read it just know its there)
Mizu revealing her being a woman to taigen AFTER he confesses his feelings to mizu AFTER being bested during their duel once again is literally so fucking personal to me. Jesus fuck... FUCK. Like. How overwhelmingly loved she must feel. How SEEN. Truly for once n not just but loved and wanted!!! Its so personal to me. Just. Taigen, losing, n then immediately leaning in for a kiss. Mizu is lost cuz what?? Why?? N taigen just. Confesses, but hes holding back cuz mizus reaction was not great and he doesn't wanna ruin the friendship they've formed these past months, they've grown so close so fast n its scary but so exciting n so right but if mizu doesnt want this then nothing is happening n its ok he has a CHOICE. Like. FUCK!! N then mizu telling taigen to wait and that night she reveals it. And its just sooo fucking intimate. Its so soft. And maybe taigen is confused but one look at how small mizu is making herself, like shielding herself from him. Like he gets it. The danger of it all. And its his promise to protect her if she ever needs to that does her in cuz. SHE HAS A CHOICE. TO BE PROTECTED OR NOT. THATS SO IMPORTANT TO HER. Yes, she can protect herself. Yes, it feels good to be protected. Yknow??
Mizu revealing her being a woman to akemi totally by accident AFTER they just had an argument abt women's choices in society AFTER mizu accidentally took one (1) big sip of sake, n then deciding fuck it im gonna win this argument, guess what akemi. And that's how akemi finds out. N Mizu thinks akemi is going to hate her, n she does for a bit in silence, but mostly shes just hurt? For herself AND for Mizu. Cause she understands, so suddenly, so intimately, how hard being a woman is and how mizu has had to hide as a man to survive (not even for plot reasons that we know, mizu being mixed AND a woman? Death sentence). And she just hurts. And they thought they'd always have this weird rift between them but they cry and they let it out (for Mizu, for the first time in YEARS) and its just. Its so emotional n so important and so personal and intimate. Its maybe winter all over again, a year has passed since theyd seen each other in kyoto, so much has changed and yet not rly and. They've grown but in different ways. Akemi, in taking life by the reins n being assertive and strong and so dangerously intelligent like shes always been but now, now its crucial to be that. And Mizu in realizing that she truly, truly wants to be loved so badly but to be loved is to be vulnerable and thats what scares her the most, to be weak; but ure only strong if u can be weak too, and thats what she learns. And i think this is where they really get deep into their feelings. Before it was a crush, an annoying one. Now? Oh bby theyre down bad. Yes they are.
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