#i think they look related and im right!

[might-be-a-potato]

acceleracers time !!!!! Did some quick screenshot redraws while I'm tryin to learn how to draw them (dr tezla beloved why must you be so hard to draw ;_;)

+ some bonus doodles vvv

#NEW YEAR NEW ME #IT'S ACCELERACERS TIME BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY #they mean everything to me <3 #I think my childhood show deserves some overdue love #help im in love with a morally dubious old man #<- many of you yellow bunny lovers can relate i bet #(looking at you spacie- we're still goin on that field trip right?) #vert wheeler #nolo pasaro #kurt wylde #karma eiss #shirako takamoto #deezel riggs #mitchell mcclurg #peter tezla #oh hi applejack #GIG acceleracers #acceleracers #acceleracers fanart #hot wheels acceleracers #tato doodles #wow that's a lotta tags fhjdkshfjdkhf

[nerdie-faerie]

I'm once again thinking about the missed opportunities to have Klaus and Kol bond more. Part of Klaus' whole motivation as a vampire is to get his werewolf part back and to finally be stronger than Mikael (sort of, I'm simplifying) both of which can be obtained by breaking his curse. But Kol? Kol is the only other original that can relate to having a fundamental part of themself ripped away from them. Klaus might not have known he was a werewolf until he killed, but he likely still had a connection he couldn't explain, as evident by him going to watch the wolves transform. And something he'd never been able to explain was now gone. He might only be able to realise the connection afterwards through its absence.

Kol though. Kol had grown up with magic, a connection to nature and the world around him in a way the rest of his siblings supposedly didn't have. And then he gets turned. And not only has his baby brother died, his father has just murdered him and the rest of his siblings after forcing them to drink human blood, which he'll later learn. Now, not only does he have to deal with the grief of Henrik's death and also his own but also the loss of his magic. A loss that's likely only worsened by Kol being a self-proclaimed child prodigy.

Kol is pretty much the only one who could understand what Klaus is going through with the binding of his wolf. We know Kol searched for ways to get his magic back/carry on practicing magic in the same way that Klaus was looking for ways to break his curse. While Klaus likely could still feel his wolf there despite being bound, Kol has no access to his magic anymore. I just think they should've been able to bond or connect over their shared loss of an intrinsic aspect of their selves at the hands of their parents

#TVD #The Mikaelsons #Kol Mikaelson #Klaus Mikaelson #briefly back on my the originals shouldve gotten to be a family goddammit and as someone from a big family im personally offended bs #i did right a lil snippet about them bonding over this that i havent posted yet for the joml verse but still think its an unexplored concep #need more witch!kol acknowledgement honestly. just need more content of my boy #anyway. klaus having a fascination with the moon and kol telling him about celestial events and how it affects his magic when theyre boys #klaus losing that connection to the moon feeling lost & extra tempermental feeling his wolf claw at its binds and vowing to break his curse #kol determined to get his magic back at any cost relating to that devasting loss and promising to help him find a loophole for his curse #kol who becomes extra reckless and determined when he learns that theres a way to break klaus' curse so maybe he can get his magic back too #that knowledge and recklessness combined with his loss of magic driving him to become the volatile vampire that we see #that leads to him being daggered repeatedly but that first time breaks something in that bond between him & klaus that never fully recovers #it makes him bitter and resentful only fueling his reckless behaviour particularly when there seems to be no leads on reclaiming his magic #that he becomes distant from his siblings in the process especially with finn still daggered but that distance only cements the idea #to his siblings that hes a danger and cant be trusted that he needs to be daggered if theyre to stay safe from mikael #the loss of his magic leading to his spiral as a vampire and him being ostracised by his family > actual tvdu kol canon #klaus being trapped in a room staring at the corpse of his little brother knowing he never repaired that relationship with him #and now he never can so he refuses to look away as penance and a reminder of his failings to his little brother #*edit: one of the reblogs on this post is the author of big bad wolf and honestly she does an amazing job at portraying the mikaelsons #as actual siblings if you havent read it its one of my favourites for characterisations but we need more 😭 i want it to be the norm

[melatien]

tiny yoichi (unwillingly) lures out soldiers by being his helplessness little self so his brother can strike

#bases are the most reliable way to find food afo found! #yoichi is crying bcuz he pitys them <3 #not because hes nervous #im gonna be honest i made this idea up on the spot when drawing this #pewdiepies new art video awakened something in me I NEEDED TO REMIND MYSELF I CAN STIL DRAW BANGERS TOO #i didnt disappoint myself!!!! competitiveness is my enemy and my bestie literally #anyways his right eye was an absolute horrendous nightmare to draw it was going so well until i did the hair then it ruined the eye #i actually thought yoichi was wearing shoes at this age but then i looked back at those chapters and realised yoichi was shoeless #WITH ONLY A BANDAGE ON HIS FOOT??!?!!?!? agony #can yoichi not make me wish he had something good in life for ONE SECOND #think of this as like how he responded to afo killing those people that (presumably) beat yoichi up beforehand #we dont know if hes crying because his brother is killing or if he was crying before being 'saved' #ill try do some fluff art soon ive been really interested in body horror related art lately so i wanted to play around!!! #i have a BUNCH of ideas written down ive yet to do #i just keep doing whatever i feel like #i am the master of ignoring the instructions and winging it #mha #my art #yoichi shigaraki #one for all #my hero academia #first ofa user #shigaraki yoichi #mha yoichi #tiny yoichi #tiny yoichi in his shabby little clothes #ive actually been dying to draw tiny yoichi again but KIDS ARE SO HARD TO DRAW!!!!! #i had an art moment though #HALLEJUHAH #art gods had my back fr

[oceanwithouthermoon]

the psychickers make saiki watch romantic killer and tease him cuz the protagonist is literally him if he didnt have esp

#im right #teruhashi and saiki relate to like. most of the conflict in the show though. #and the characters #theyre saiki if he didnt have powers and teruhashi if she actually registered her trauma #cough cough also kusuo and anzu r both characters that get aroace stereotypes pushed onto them COUGH COUGHHHHH #like its lovely to hc them as on the aroace spectrum but ppl in both fandoms do the whole- #'if u dont think theyre aroace ur supporting aroace erasure🤓' thing and its fucking stupid and gross #teruhashi would fucking cry at both saki and kazukis stories btw #i mean anyone would but it hits so hard for her #the fact that in the long run the thing that fucked kazuki over wasnt even his looks it was his genuine kindness. #that would give teruhashi a mental breakdown #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #saiki kusuo #toritsuka reita #aiura mikoto #akechi touma #pk psychickers #meows post

[transsextual]

had a really incredible moment this evening. went to my campus art market where one of my friends was selling the tank top i'm wearing - another friend bought it for me and i'm so overjoyed to have it. usually a fit that leans more Traditionally Masculine feels like a costume but tonight it just felt deeply correct and honest and warm. took the opportunity to take some indulgent little pictures because i do not think i have Ever looked more like myself. so happy.

#im like. slowly gently exploring butchness & ... what it means to me & ... trying to release the idea that it requires Masculinity.... #ive always felt pretty disconnected from masculinity as a whole but i'm starting to find points of entry that resonate really deeply #& along with that is like... esp when it comes 2 kink & leather & butchness - which r not intrinsically related but to me they r connected #theres this idea that like. i'm taking myself too seriously. and that nobody's gonna take me seriously. and that i'm too little too young #that im like #obviously inexperienced and a joke and failing and looking stupid . #but ... realized recently that . that's really just the trauma talking #and that i can just like. try shit out. and notice how it feels + what comes up #and then try it again if i so wish #and nothing i try has to be permanent or defining ... and that like . my desires and comforts and joys and needs Should Be Taken Seriously #soooo much of my like. impostor syndrome . has to do with worrying that im not doing it right when compared to other men #but like.... most of the kinky men / leathermen i see are 35+ and cis . #of course im not doing it like them . #so . looking to the queers i know. especially my fellow transmascs as well as lesbians . for like. reassurance and inspiration #has been very healing . & good for my heart & my soul. #:) #yeah . #i think i gotta go read butch is a noun. ... yeah #goodnight :) #speak #materialization #ok2rb

[marcmorrigan]

Released to [REDACTED]. SPK 02-04-10 6:45 PM

also released:

3 - One (1) sealed bag s/c cigarettes & lighter which were found in right exterior vest pocket of unnamed male accomplice.

4 - One (1) sealed bag s/c polaroid photo which was found in left interior vest pocket of unnamed male accomplice.

Note: victim posthumously identified as one Mail Jeevas, DOB 02/01/1990 (aged 19yrs at time of death). Request that Gevanni update documentation accordingly. - N

always thinking about the polaroids matt and mello didnt get to take + the amount of clean up and paperwork near and the SPK probably had to do after they seized all the kira case files from 'L'... also like. do you think near had to identify matts body. who else was there that couldve done it. anyway whatever teehee <3

+ 'clean'(er) version without all the scratches and stuff:

#death note #mellodramattic #mellomatt #mihael keehl #mail jeevas #my art #posts only show up in the first five tags right... whatevs thats plenty #literally based the caption off an evidence release related to the jfk assassination so if i wrote the documentation out wrong no i didnt!! #anyway. theyre trans + in love + deserved to take cute photos of themselves #and whenever i added the frame iwl ohhh. theres only one person who COULD have this picture. which is when i decided to add the blood stain #i PERSONALLY dont think matt and mello were in contact until after mells left lidners hotel but we can pretend. for the sake of the art #re: the date on the photo + mello not having his scars i mean #also mello is a type o negative fan you CANNOT change my mind its so real to me. i Know It. anesthesia is ON my mellodramattic playlist #obviously ref'ed from that one GQ shoot w jesse rutherford and devon carlson... idk them but i LOVE those photos theyre so fun #i need to look up more of taylor rainbolts photography bc i feel like theres a looot of potential insp to be had there for my work #ANYWAY! theres a plain-er version under the cut if u wanna see it w/out as many overlays and scratches and such #im so glad 2 be done w this piece i have been working on it on and off since. NOVEMBER OF 2022... #ITS AUGUST OF 2023 NOW. I DRAW AT A NORMAL SPEED DW ABOUT IT <3 #death note spoilers #<--- for my beloved nat

[carkali]

Something i'd like to point out

We can assume the final part of p2 of the canto was not only from heathcliff's perspective but dante's as well, considering we know they can look directly into their memories when resonating with them.

we did not get a new cg for carmen's appearance. This is something you could chalk up to time on the artist's part, and wanting to focus purely on "main" story cgs perhaps? But for this im gonna assume it was purposeful

For those who aren't aware or need a refresher, this CG is from ayin's perspective, from ayin's memory of laying with her in the grass in the past, in the first game

its personal, and there's only one body who could have this image in their mind.

when viewed this way, the lack of even a redraw feels more intentional 😀...?

#limbus company #dante #carmen #heathcliff #lobotomy corporation #canto vi #Yeah sorry #i think the intention the theory and the story is more nuanced than Oh so dante is just ayin #and i know this has a history of being a laughed at idea pretty rightfully so even #but im just trying to look with my eyes alone here and im noting this down as Something i saw #also id rather no comments on any perceived laziness by the artist because. well i am hoping you know about vellmoris situation #and how its probably not easy right now. Whole other post #canto vi spoilers #red string board #Ignore im just putting any uhh theory related posts or whatever in that tag for my own finding #I tried to keep this one really short since i just wanted to get it out there yeeep yep yep #More carmen stuff to come if i let it out of my head

[lord-squiggletits]

Thinking about IDW Optimus again and the fandom's aversion to even acknowledging he exists bc he's a cop or whatever and like. Most of the time people literally just replace him in fic with some white bread knockoff archivist/librarian, not even bothering to keep in IDW OP's personality (which just bolsters my theory that the problem isn't him being a cop the problem is that he's too multifaceted but I digress).

And it's annoying because you could totally write IDW Optimus as not a cop while still keeping his canon personality. You just have to realize that the reason IDW OP became a cop in the first place is because his formative experiences when he was young shaped him to basically have two priorities: 1. To help people and 2. To do it by being on the ground actively doing something about the bad things happening to people.

IDW OP would not be a fucking librarian or archivist because even though those are noble pursuits that can help people and change the world, and Optimus is educated/smart enough for the profession, he wouldn't be satisfied just teaching people or spreading information about activism or social-historical studies or whatever. He's a mech of action: he needs to be doing things right now, in front of him, to people he sees/interacts with in his own eyes, improving society with concrete actions rather than indirect action or abstract inspiration.

So basically the alternate job ideas I can think of for IDW Optimus are something like being a firefighter (or any first responder really) or even whatever the equivalent would be to international charity organizations, those ones that send volunteers across the world to do stuff like build housing/infrastructure or distribute food or whatnot. I mean I can't imagine that the equivalents to these things would be exactly the same in IDW Cybertron, so you'd have to get a little creative with it, but these are just some ideas of jobs that would fit IDW Optimus' personality while still filling the niche of "not a cop" for people who are just that opposed to it.

Though I think the revulsion against coptimus is annoying in general tbh because IDW is already a continuity that rejects the idea of easily defined good/evil people or groups. It feels like people really want Optimus to be a good person in a very sanitized and academically approved way, so he has to be nice and squeaky clean but also like, a perfect leftist who knows theory and holds the most progressive opinions on every single issue....

There is no room for the idea that good people join bad institutions, there's no room for the idea that the reason people think cops are good guys who help people is bc of the government propaganda everything is saturated with. Hell there's even later issues of the Optimus Prime series by John Barber where Optimus like, MULTIPLE FUCKING TIMES, is shown in flashbacks grappling with the fact that he as a cop/Zeta's regime that he works for might not actually be improving society like they say they are, and dealing with the fact that he feels more like a lesser evil compared to the Decepticons (perhaps not "lesser" at all).

It's like there's this idea in fandom of like, fictional media and opinions on media having to strictly adhere to progressive ideals at all times. So people just go "cops bad, this character is a cop, therefore they suck" without being willing to engage with the idea of like. IDW OP is born wanting to fight injustice and protect people -> a good way to protect people is to fight the people who are hurting them and committing crimes -> surely following the law is a reliable moral code to guide him in this -> becomes a cop because he's been indoctrinated into a society (much like our own) where he was told that the state/the law exist to protect the people and being a cop means you get to fight bad guys that hurt people. There's really so many interesting concepts there that could be (and CANONICALLY IS) explored about how good, well-intentioned people can be led to harmful actions simply because they have been fed the idea that the things they're doing are good/helpful/noble. Which is especially important for a character like Optimus, I think, who has a cultural icon status as The Irrefutable and Perfect Good, so it's really important actually to use IDW Optimus as an example of how even the most noble people you know have held problematic beliefs or done bad things at some point in their life. You know, because no one is born perfect and ideologically pure, and in fact society is constructed in exactly a manner to make people drink the kool-aid and believe that the systems designed to hurt them/others are just a normal, if flawed, society.

I mean the writing in IDW literally has Optimus deal directly and indirectly with the harm he's done as a cop and how people don't/didn't trust him because of that. I don't know what the fuck else this fandom wants if the source material literally saying "OP realizes that cops suck and he hurt people and earned their disdain by doing the things he did" doesn't stop them from going EW cop bastard sucks and is the worst Optimus. Like the narrative barely stops short of outright saying ACAB and Optimus himself would agree with this sentiment.

At that point, the collective fandom beef with IDW OP isn't because he's a cop and the narrative didn't do enough to condemn that. The problem is literally just that people don't read and don't care

TLDR: Consider the fact that good people can do bad things sometimes especially when living from birth in a corrupt society that thoroughly disguises its vices/oppressive structures as completely normal parts of existence

#squiggposting #idw op love #like honestly just admit that you havent actually read his parts of the story #or that in a continuity of moral grayness you insist OP must be the one person who's perfectly good #bc idk Optimus is supposed to be good and perfect bc nostalgia/marketing/mythology says he should be #also i feel like theres evidence here of a very juvenile mindset of like #to be good a person has to have all the right beliefs and say it in all the right ways #which is the mindset only extremely insular or inexperienced ppl could possibly have lmao #heartbreaking i know but IRL there are very few people who are and always have been progressive and perfect #there are ppl within progressive mvmts that have unaddressed harmful beliefs outside of their Chosen Issue #there are people who wouldnt ID as progressive at all but are still good ppl who act well towards others #like if youve actually interacted with ppl IRL you understand that if you reject everyone who isnt Perfectly Progressive #youll have few if any allies and possibly alienate ppl who would help/ARE HELPING #like idk do you know how many ppl i personally know who i think have some bigoted/problematic beliefs #but im still friends or collaborators w them bc i understand that theyre still good ppl learning and growing #like. learn to understand that 'goodness' doesnt always look like a walking leftist textbook please i'm begging #and in fact sometimes stories. esp adult and mature ones. will present you w problematic ppl #and you have to like. grapple with their flaws and explore the tension between intention and consequences #a bit of a philosophy tangent rather than anything TF related which is why i kept it to the tags

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

THE BEST OF SHENKO 1/?

The end of the world has a way of reminding you of all the things you forgot to say do. Mass Effect: Legendary Edition (2021)

#mira makes gifs ✨ #kaidan alenko #sophie shepard #EDI #shenko #fshenko #mass effect #mass effect legendary edition #dailygaming #OTP: you're real enough for me #i learned i am physically incapable of creating less than like 20 gifs at a time #but shenko stonks are up right now!! #gif’ing my favorite bisexuals gives me joy 🥹 #even though ME2 is dry as shit for shenko content like it’s literally the sahara desert #like a whole ass 10 minutes max of cutscenes between shep and kaidan like come on #like 2 minutes in the prologue and like 8 minutes of cutscenes on horizon #and then an email and looking at the picture in your cabin before the suicide mission #i'm so sorry y'all ME2 shenko canon is absolute shit (besides kaidan being rightfully angry on horizon) which is why we ✨ignore it✨ 🥰 #but i rant about ME2 VS treatment too much so i will not write another essay about it in the tags #i will say the EDI line isn't the exact quote from the game but i think about it a lot tbf #same with the quote i borrowed from anderson too lmao (which is also a tiny bit paraphrased) #i just love EDI asking shep for relationship advice when you get to follow shep and kaidan's relationship/struggles across 3 games #and anderson's quote about all the things you forgot to do in relation kahlee to is just *chef's kiss* when you think about shenko #like whether it starts in ME1 or ME3 shenko has some really fantastic moments across the series #two characters with strong morals who realize that they're falling in love and literally start to become each other's strength?? #their soft place to land?? their support when they need it?? shenko will always have my heart #also the shenko quotes you get are the most fire thing in the world #you're real enough for me?? you make me feel human?? i want to be your strength- your soft place to land?? shenko you will always be famous #I FORGOT IM GONNA FIGHT LIKE HELL FOR THE CHANCE TO HOLD YOU AGAIN TOO LIKE?? #but i’ll stop ranting now bc i do that wayyy to much in my tags lol. have a good day wherever you are! <3

[myonmukyuu]

I made a ship chart and it somehow became really complex and full of drama!!! (template)

#'yupomu looks really complicated' you might say #and you'd be right! #but please perceive lanzhu too I think her situation is more dire 😭😭 #im a lover of unrequited love 🥺 #im an AZUNA/R3 main so most ships are related to them #im pretty easy with ships otherwise hence the giant orange tier #myon speaks #love live #love live nijigasaki #most of the orange ships are me going 'lmao that'd be pretty funny' and trying to figure out how to draw the line

[samarecharm]

So funny that i find myself w less and less new music to discover compared to what i was finding in my teen years, and i am like 98% sure its bc i havent watched frag videos or amvs in over a decade 😭

#chattin #like nearly 60% of my songs are from my ipod. #my IPOD #hundreds of songs i found from watching High Art from before 2012 #i have songs from last fm that literally do not exist ANYWHERE anymore. like i gotta make an effort to upload some of these for ppl #whereas most of my newly discovered songs are from artists i found prior to 2012 (and theyre still making music) #artists adjacent to THOSE artists #video game music #and artists related to that music #so im not like. exposed to completely mew and untethered music yanno? #mew……i meant NEW 😭 #that one insane uno video had a really REALLY good song and i have no idea if it was made for the video or if it exists on ytube or bandcamp #and i absolutely count that as an amv lmao #i think its bc i dont play games that would make for good frags anymore like ovw and halo #and i dont watch anime anymore so i havent tried to watch amvs #like. there was a really good mp100 one but i wasnt invested enough to look for more 😭 #maybe i should ask my sister for some jjk amvs….theres lots of fighting in that one right? i think that would help #u have no idea what people deem a good song for amvs and thats what makes them so fun; i love knowing what people listen to #oh i just realized; i think i am showing my age; do ppl even call it frags anymore??? #is it an amv or a fancam?? or something else…i also dont use tiktok so im unsure of the terms there too…

[healingheartdogs]

Cardio said my echocardiogram ultrasound, exercise stress test, and week long heart monitor all showed no serious issues, my resting heart rate is fine, but that my heart rate does seem to rise very rapidly under even small amounts of stress (postural changes, taking stairs, casually walking around my house) and rises very high (160+ bpm according to the monitor) so now I get to be put on beta blockers to see if they work and if they do she said that is sufficient evidence to confirm for sure that it's POTS.

Obviously could confirm it as well with a tilt table test but those are TORTURE based off what I've heard from fellow POTSies so I am very thankful that she doesn't think that's necessary and will not be making me do one.

#i was not expecting to get dx and meds this fast tbh but im very happy about it #i think the fact that she also has POTS herself helps because she is very well acquaintaned with what it looks and feels like #and how hard it is to actually catch with orthostatics in office unless youre having a bad heart day #so my orthostatics not being within range was unsurprising to her and she was like #'that doesnt mean anything you clearly still have a heart rate issue going on even if it didnt show itself right now' #i didnt do shit the entire week i had that monitor on to like physically exert myself but my heart rate still hit almost 170 a few times #also the doctor who did my stress test asked me if i ever experience any chest discomfort or pain and i was like hm no dont think so #and he went 'your chart says you have palpitations though?' #and i was like '... those count as discomfort???' akdjaicidjwjcjsn the answer is yes apparently #im just so used to them now because i have them daily that they dont even really register to me anymore #unless theyre bad enough to knock the wind out of me or make me cough #they just make me anxious which... ig is also a form of discomfort #chronic illness and chronic pain problems though lol not having a normal baseline for discomfort and pain #ndr #not dog related #health stuff #not that anyone probably cares lol but im excited about getting things that have neen affecting me for years FINALLY figured out #im not crazy im just disabled!!!! #*been

[todayisafridaynight]

sorry if you've already been asked this but what did you think about eiji in iw? like idk i feel like they were trying to recreate a masato and ichi moment without actually having any of the elements that made their relationship narratively compelling.

as a whole, i thought eiji was at least a nice 'how he wished things couldve been' for ichi in regards to masato, but still being independent enough from the masato comparison to stand on his own as a character (or at least as an antagonist. his actions wasn't what was reminding me he was a masato parallel, but more so ichi's insistence he help him). i think thats why ichi and eiji's relationship don't have the same 'elements' that make their relationship interesting like masato and ichi's

#iw spoilers #not really but lol #snap chats #like what made masato and ichi interesting was their family dynamic and how they were narrative foils to each other #eiji isn't supposed to be that. both in-universe and meta wise he's just meant to remind ichi of masato not wholly replace him #and not replace who masato was in ichi's life. just yk. trick him for a bit fJALKAJ #i mean sure you can still find their relationship uninteresting with that in mind so just to me i thought it was cute at the very least #at least in that you can see ichi trying his hardest to connect with eiji #like you can tell he just doesn't want history to repeat even if he's mostly projecting his fears onto eiji #and the situation is not. equivocal LMAO but i digress #i don't feel strongly about eiji one way or another- i mean i liked how it was easy to tell he was going to be an antagonist vjlKJAJ #i dont mind that kind of thing though. i like being able to pick up on things being Not Right with a character or situation #so it was neat seeing how that culminated. still confused on what he was blackmailing chitose with but i assume it's family related #sometimes i think about how beau says eiji and ebina were meant to be rgg feeling bad about killing aoki and it makes me chortle vjalkvjla #anyway thats the end of my eiji prattle. oh ps i like how he actually had a chair that doesnt look painful to sit in #veyr cringe he turned out Not to be disabled but listen if i start talking about masato's disability again im gonna lose my mind #as i frantically close my thirty tabs about lung diseases/conditions and lung transplants and patients' anecdotes post operation

[epicdogymoment]

gender and sexuality labels are so fucking hard how am i supposed to know how what i experience (already hard to pin down) compares to what "normal people" experience (completely unknown to me)

#leologisms #smthn smthn gender and sexuality labels are social constructs that exist within the assumption of a 'normal' experience #and a) i have no idea what EXACTLY that experience is supposed to be like b) im not fully convinced it actually EXISTS #youre telling me 'normal' people all experience attraction/gender in this ONE particular way? for real? youve gotta be lying to me #even ''''''normal'''''' (allo cishet) people talk about how their experiences with romance dont align with how its commonly talked about #how am i (transgay autist) supposed to know exactly what a 'normal' experience is in order to categorise myself in relation to it #more and more i find myself attracted to ambiguous identities because i have no way of defining myself more precisely that feels right #not male or female or even nonbinary but simply transgender. if 'gay' didnt carry the meaning 'homosexual' id probably identify more #strongly with it too (rather than bi) #for a while ive been wondering about ace identities but ive been reluctant to actually explore them too deeply because a) im afraid of #stepping on toes (for some reason. i dont know why.) b) im sure these labels ARE useful for lots of people but man. considering right now i #in a sort of. 'dont look at it too hard' space wrt my identities i dont actually think id even feel very comfortable w any of them anyway #do i experience attraction in a normal way? maybe. define normal.

[creatediana]

"Lines Written Hastily on Someone Else's Desk" - a poem written 3/27/2024

I have to sneak into your desk— I've calculated every risk— I have to test out all your pens and blot out with them my chagrins. I have an urge for every ink— for every mark I make I rank the color and the thickness.—In my rainbow correspondent brain this is the peak of knowledge—yes, the summit of my study's bliss. I snoop and steal to these fair ends— my paper keeps exotic winds.

#been awhile since i posted any of my #handwriting #2024 #iambic meter #iambic tetrameter #quatrains #rhyme scheme #poem #poetry #poets on tumblr #i've probably written idk how many poems about how i love snooping through other ppl's desks at work #listen. i just wanna see what kind of writing utensils u got #and use them on myyyyy paper teehee~ more colors #awhile back at my sister-in-law's bachelorette party. all the other women were talking about #how they like to look in ppl's medicine cabinets. and i was like what? why? #bc my sister-in-law and her blood sisters were talking abt how u do it early in a relationship #and i just couldn't relate. and it wasn't like a deeply voyeuristic things. it was more like #they just wanna see what u keep and how. in ur bathroom setup. #i mean i kinda get it. it is looking at how somebody lives. #in some very basic ways that arent super personal but theyre not necessarily apparent when u meet them #but anyway now i think abt that every time i go looking through ppl's desks. im like Oh This Is What I'm Doing. #the creepiest thing i've ever done is sniff somebody's chapstick. i wanted to know how minty it smelled #i should stop this confessional right now

[imflyingfish]

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#i have no idea how to respond to the whole qsmp situation right now #i mean. i dont watch it or interact with qsmp ITSELF #only the fans around it #I have made fanart for it but not really because i have any particular attachment to specific characters but just because #its a very good springboard for character design and inspiration #Im very involved with the fanbase though as the QSMPnews discord is one of my main discords #and I mainly use the fandom space as a way of practicing/getting into foreign languages #although i dont watch qsmp it still has impacted my life massively in the last year #this clusterfuck of project management is difficult to unravel and know what to do with #and its difficult to know exactly where to turn your attention #or who to blame #since theres so many levels of miscommunication that hasnt been helped by the sharing of it online #i think. even if QSMP doesn't survive #it would be ludicrous to state it as an inherently harmful server #since there has been an evident change in the minecraft gaming space because of it in multiculturalism. #heck IM direct proof of that as someone who does not reguarly engage with the server itself via streams #the fact that as a result of a 21 year old kid deciding to start a sever I can end up with a group of spanish speakers trying to explain #various concepts to me in my language while i respond in theirs is. insane #so do i think that the qsmp will survive? #um. look i dont see how it can. #I've never thought that it could #but i dont think that im going to demonise fans or avoid content relating to it #considering how integral the fanspaces around it are to me and my personal quest for language proficiency #however I will attempt to keep qsmp posts on my french/spanish blogs #well that was. long-winded #idk this is a very self-centred look into the qsmp and this whole situation #obviously I hope that the staff get paid but. I really have no idea where Quackity Studios might get that money from or how the #server should either end or continue