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queerhargreeves · 5 years

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De-aged Luther whump fic pls !! Where the family finds out that Reginald treated him much, much worse than they think (ex. Gaslighting, sexual abuse, pain, water and food endurance training), but Luther still thinks it's love?

wowie this is the second longest fic ive ever written?? i hope you enjoy anon and thank you for your kindness and patience!

TW: child sexual abuse and child abuse discussed

(gif by tuagifs)

The Hargreeves have had to put up with a lot of things that would drive most people to absolute madness throughout their lives. From the second each of them were born, their definition of what “normal” is would rival that of pretty much anyone. The seven of them were trained to be obedient soldiers in a goddamn science experiment by a man with too much power. This man wasn’t capable of love or compassion, no. Quite the opposite.

He treated them like they were shiny toys. Sir Reginald Hargreeves wanted them to reach impossibly high standards and would stop at absolutely nothing to make sure they got there.

They only had 30 minutes of designated “free time” a week growing up. The only time they could do as they please, within “reason”. Granted that didn’t stop them from sneaking out to get donuts after hours, Pogo keeping their secret safe.

“You all deserve to be children, Master Luther. All I ask of you is to not be too careless. We can’t have your father finding out, now can we?”

Daily rigorous training ranged anywhere from running five miles before breakfast to memorizing every pressure point in the human body and how they worked/functioned. Individual training, specialized by Sir Hargreeves himself, was another story in of itself. Water tanks, mausoleums, broken and straining limbs, tearing animals apart, throats so coarse and raw you couldn’t speak for a week, spatial jumps for four consistent hours, constant exclusion from activities …it was all the norm for these kids. Nothing out of the ordinary.

They have all gone through experiences that any average bystander wouldn’t even be able to begin to wrap their heads around. The Hargreeves have powers, yes. Their time traveling brother who left them 17 years ago came back, is nearly 60 years old, and was reverted back to the 13 year old body he disappeared in, yes. Their dysfunctional family may have caused the end of the world, yes. They avoided the end of the world, yes.

But this? Their big brother, their gallant leader, an actual child again? Now that is a lot to process, yes. Even for the ex-superheros.

It happened a few months after the family successfully didn’t cause life itself to end. They all had been making an attempt to start over with one another. The way they treated each other is what almost caused the end of the world after all.

It wasn’t easy, of course. Undoing a lifetime of trauma and repressed emotions wasn’t a simple equation or an overnight fix. It’s something that takes uncomfortable, late night hash sessions where every party involved opens up about things they don’t want to. It takes withdrawal symptoms and panic attacks. It takes realizing and acknowledging trauma and addressing it head on.

It wasn’t all tears and tension though. There were plenty of family outings, movie nights and, 2 AM impromptu baking sessions filled with nothing but laughter and comfort. They were getting better communicating with one another - they were getting better at simply existing together as an actual family instead of constantly working against their own.

The seven were out at dinner one night, Korean food per Allison’s request. The dinner went on without a hitch as they usually did nowadays, the siblings just enjoying one another’s company. However, it was after dinner when it happened.

Five noticed a man following them a bit too close for comfort as they were making their way back to the 10 seater van. It happened within seconds: an instant flash that rivals Five’s very own. One second Luther was trailing at the end of the group, listening to Ben tell a Klaus story. The next second there was a man sticking a syringe into his neck. And the next second he was on the ground, unconscious. Klaus, Ben, and Vanya rushed to his side, carrying him the rest of the way to the van. Allison, Five, and Diego stayed behind, going after the man who they didn’t even get a proper look at.

They all eventually regrouped at the house after having little luck finding the said culprit.

They were all clearly shaken after the attack. Five was, to put it quite simply, absolutely livid. He was infuriated at not only the situation itself but at himself for dismissing his instincts. Diego was also feeling quite a bit of guilt himself, but he’s been working on channeling those emotions in healthier ways. AKA no longer lashing out and hurting himself/others. Instead, he sulked silently. He played through the events that happened over and over again.

Allison was probably the most visibly distraught about the whole thing. Klaus and Ben had to quite literally drag her out of the infirmary after she refused to leave his side. She slept with her two brothers that night, wedged in between them. She couldn’t be alone. They all needed sleep and they knew Luther was in good hands.

Grace had assured them all that Luther would be fine, insisting that she would run tests on him as he got some rest. They were comforted knowing that their brother was out of the woods in terms of immediate danger of whatever substance was forcefully injected into his body. Luther would never leave Grace or Pogo’s sight for the night, the two of them adamant on making sure the six of them got some sleep that night.

None of them were prepared for what they found the next morning, however.

The six of them were all piled in the infirmary and there lied a Luther Hargreeves. A 12 year old Luther Hargreeves.

He looked so small in the bed; he was hooked up to monitors and his oversized sleeping clothes didn’t help either. His breathing was even. His chest was rising and falling in a slow, calm rhythm. His lips were slightly pursed open and he was snoring lightly.

“Holy shit.” Klaus was the first to speak up, staring in a mixture of awe and bewilderment at the small boy in the bed. “You’re no longer the babiest bro, Five.”

The statement hung in the air, thick and heavy. No one knew what to say or where to even start. Is his body just young? Or his brain too? Is it permanent? What does he remember?

“Oh, good morning children! I wasn’t expecting you all to be awake so early!” Six heads whipped towards the sound of their Mother’s heels against the hardwood floor as she walked into the infirmary.

“M-mom,” Diego’s voice shook, his eyes still glued at the young sleeping boy, “wh-what happened? Is Luther o…okay?”

“Yes dear, Luther is alright.” She said softly, resting her hand on Diego’s shoulder as she walked past him. She walked to the bed getting closer to the bed and removed one of the monitors from his chest.

“Your brother is going to be okay. It seems that he was injected with an age regression agent last night. I’m not sure how long it will last, but I’m hoping the bloodwork will give us some answers. What I can definitely say is that it will stop at this age. Luther is around 12 years old.” She explained, running a gentle hand through Luther’s hair.

“It isn’t causing him any physical harm. He was regressing quite quickly throughout the night but it stopped at 5:37 AM.”

Allison silently walked to the other side of the bed. She ran the back of her hand down Luther’s cheek, her expression soft. He looked so peaceful like this. The most peaceful she’s seen in ages.

“We…we have to be there for him when he wakes up. Luther, he was there for me after…” She paused, meeting Vanya’s eyes with a sad smile. She gave her a small nod to which Vanya reciprocated, signing “it’s okay” to her sister. They were both on good terms with what happened now. They talked it out, thousands of apologies and tears falling from both of the sister’s lips.

Allison’s voice was getting stronger every day but it was still important for everyone to be silent when she spoke so she didn’t have to strain more than necessary.

“He said he knew the comfortable dark place I was in. He didn’t want me to wake up to someone who wasn’t me anymore alone. We can’t let him go through this alone, we just can’t.” She took his hand and gave it a light squeeze, turning her gaze back to her siblings.

“Of course we’ll be there for him, Al.” Ben agreed.

And so they waited. They decided to take turns watching over him throughout the day. Diego and Five helped change Luther into the old academy pajamas before Allison and Vanya took on the first shift. Klaus and Ben went to the kitchen to make Alfredo pasta with extra chicken, Luther’s favorite dish. They remembered how insistent he was on the extra chicken when they were young.

“I need all the protein I can get! You all do too. But Five, you especially. You use up too much energy during training. This is far more nutritious and better for you than your peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches. We don’t need anymore nose bleeds. Go ahead and grab an extra chicken breast, yeah?”

Luther was always good at watching over his siblings, whether they liked it or not. Half the time it annoyed them all to no end - especially Diego. But Luther took his role as not just their leader, but as their big brother, very seriously. It was a responsibility he did not take lightly.

The pasta didn’t turn out as picture perfect as it could have if the two let Grace do all the work, but with her guidance they were able to scrap up a delicious dish between the three of them.

“Damn Ben, Olive Garden better watch out! We’re gonna steal their jobs!” Allison and Vanya could hear Klaus exclaim all the way from the kitchen, a small smile appearing on both of their faces.

“If nothing else, it’s comforting that Klaus will always be just…”

“Klaus?” Allison finishes.

“Klaus.” Vanya agrees, her gaze falling back to the boy in the bed. He was still sleeping soundly, looking as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

She doesn’t remember him being a deep sleeper - in fact, he was the lightest one of the seven. If Diego did so much as drop a book in his room or Klaus tumbled over his own feet, Luther would be in their room within a few moments to make sure they weren’t in danger. He lost a lot of sleep that way, but it never occurred to her until just now the extent of how much Luther did for them as children. Seeing him so young, so vulnerable looking was overwhelming. It was as if they were slapped in the face by past memories, repressed or otherwise.

“Mmmm…” Both women stood up at the mumbling, hovering over Luther as he started to stir in the bed. His eyes slowly started to flutter open after a few moments. You could see the realization of where he was wash over his face as he took in his surroundings. It was almost as if he was seeing right past his sisters.

“Luther?” Allison asked in a small, gentle voice. His eyes finally met hers and she placed her hand on top of his.

“M’am?” He looked down at their hands and back at her, then back down and back again. He blinked furiously, opening his mouth and closing it once more. He then whipped his head to Vanya as she tried her best to put on a gentle smile.

“Hey Lu.” She said softly.

“Vanya? Allison?” His voice went up an octave as he looked between both of his sisters. “What’s going on? Did I fail the last mission? Are you two hurt? I-I need to go back to the training room, find dad and explain! Maybe then I can -”

Allison and Vanya locked eyes as this answered a few questions. Luther definitely was mentally and 13 again, not just physically like Five. Allison’s mind reeled as she processed this, trying to think of how to even begin explaining what’s happening. Explain what has happened. Not only to Luther, but to them all.

Luther started to sit up, rambling on as he attempted to swing his legs over the bed before Allison and Vanya stopped him. Allison placed herself in front of Luther, legs shoulder width apart and hands braced on both of his shoulders. Vanya stayed at his side as she placed a firm hand on his upper arm.

“Woah, woah, woah not so fast there, Luther!” Allison knew his strength, even at this age, rivaled hers tenfold. He would only have to raise his pinky to push them both off him, but he didn’t. He let his sisters push him back in bed, but he stayed upright.

“Lu,” Vanya started, her hand still on his arm. “I can’t even imagine how overwhelming this all must be. Before I get the others I just need you to know that-”

“You’re all old.” Luther said simply.

Allison let out a small chuckle at the transparent comment and threw her head back ever so slightly. Luther had always been Mr. Obvious.

“You could say that, yeah.” Vanya scoffed, “I’ll go get the others if you’re ready?”

Luther drew his lips in a thin line, “What about Dad?” He asked cautiously, sounding all too much like the 12 year old he was.

“Dad…” Vanya looked up at Allison, wordlessly asking for help here.

“We’ll talk about it when Van and the other boys are here, yeah?” Allison reassured, trying to keep her best ‘mom’ voice on in an attempt to ease some of her brother’s evident nerves.

Luther just nodded at that answer as it was found satisfactory enough for him. Vanya gave his arm one last squeeze before disappearing down the hall. Within 30 seconds the rest of the Hargreeves came in the room, single file line. Luther watched every single one of them as they walked inside, his eyes wide and mouth pursed open.

Diego was always rough around the edges, but seeing him in all black, bearded, and scarred was certainly a bit unnerving. Klaus made him smile ever so slightly. It made Luther happy that Klaus was still oh so very much Klaus, even with a plate of pasta in his lanky arms. Eyeliner, skirt, and messy curls. Ben was a bit odd to see - blue around the edges and younger than the other two brothers before him. But Five. God that certainly put his head through a loop as if he hadn’t had enough of that already. He looked…just like he remembered. Small frame with a sharp jaw and the most intense blue eyes.

“Guten morgen, dear Luther.” Klaus said singsongly, placing the plate of pasta on the wheeled tray and wheeling it next to the bed.

“Vanya told us you woke up! Welcome back.” He sat down in one of the chairs in the room, the rest of the siblings also taking a seat.

“Thanks…” Luther drew the word out, “The pasta smells good. Thank you for that too.”

“Nonsense.” Klaus waved his hand in the air, “I’m just glad to see you’re okay.” He said honestly, crossing his legs and leaning down to rest his elbows on his knees.

“I-” Luther stopped for a moment, “I think I understand what’s happening. You’re all..older. But,” He turned to where Five was seated next to Ben. “Five?”

“It’s a bit of a long story, as this whole situation is. But I time traveled, managed to get stuck for quite a while, then came back in this body. I’m actually older than all of you, but that’s besides the point.” Five explained flippantly, “How are you doing, Luther?”

Luther gave a shaky nod as Five explained, “I’m um.” He gulped and looked back up at Allison who still stood over the bed. “When can I see Dad?”

All of the siblings tensed at the question, sharing looks with one another. Surprising to everyone it was Diego who spoke up first.

“Lu, Dad isn’t here.” He explained. “You don’t have to w-wor-worry about him anymore. It’s okay.”

Luther shook his head and a few dry chuckles fell from his lips. “Yeah, uh huh. And two times two equals three.” He spat.

“Luther…” Allison said calmly, “Diego is telling the truth. Dad is dead.” She watched as his blue eyes start to brim with tears. But Luther immediately threw his hand up to wipe them away. He shook his head again, this time more violently.

“No, no he can’t be… I-I didn’t report the last mission! I need to, I-” He started to try to get up once more, this time Diego and Ben rushing to the bed to attempt to keep him from getting up any further.

“Luther, it’s okay, please! Calm down.” Vanya said, voice shaking as Luther struggled against his brothers.

“No! No I need to get back to training! I need to go to the weight room! I-I can lift 2,000 pounds now! I need to show Dad! He’ll take me to the tree again if I don’t show him! Just LET ME GO!” Luther shouted, furiously pounding his fists against Diego’s chest. Diego and Ben held him in place best they could, letting their brother dispel the pent up frustration into their bodies. They could take it, for now. And it was evident he was running out of steam.

Vanya wordlessly sat down on the bed and wrapped her arms around his waist. He stiffened at the touch, his incessant pounding coming to an abrupt stop.

“Luther, it’s alright. You don’t have to train.” She gently pulled Luther into her lap. It wasn’t too uncomfortable as he was about an inch taller than her at this point. It seemed to do the trick. Luther let himself be held from behind, something she knew never happened to them as kids. They were all so touch deprived and it pains her remembering how much Luther would avoid any touch at all a few months back.

Vanya rested her head on his shoulder and he found himself leaning into the touch, finding comfort in her firm embrace. He can’t remember the last time he was held like this.

“Your body has been through a lot, Lu. You can’t go up and lash out like that, okay? At least not right now, not until we get more answers.” Allison sad next to the pair on the bed, running a hand through Luther’s soft, golden hair. He nodded, feeling his eyes begin to sting yet again with tears. He closed them shut as the tears silently fell down his face.

“This is a lot to process, Luther. You’re doing a really good job so far. We just want to protect you. You know that, right?” Five spoke up softly. It hurt him seeing his brother so panicked, so afraid. Five remembers Diego and Luther saying something similar to him when he was in need.

“I’m sorry,” Luther choked out. “I-I didn’t mean to.” He opened his eyes and looked up at Diego and Ben. Ben looked fairly untouched. His hair was a bit disheveled at worst. Diego, however, was another story. He had a split lip and red marks along his neck and whatever skin was visible. He didn’t look angry or upset though. His brows were furrowed in concern.

The brown eyed man shook his head, “I know that, Lu. Don’t worry, you’re not in trouble. I’m okay, bro.” He knew Luther must be thinking there is going to be some sort of punishment. There always was when Luther and Diego would brawl as kids. Well, when they weren’t asked to brawl anyway. But that wasn’t the case anymore.

“Luther,” Klaus finally spoke up after a few moments of silence, “What did you mean by the tree?” He remembers Luther mentioning Reginald’s ‘favorite place’ at his funeral, but he never thought to ask him anything more about it.

Luther tensed, his gaze falling to his lap. He clenched his hands tightly, adamant on not crying anymore. Crying was weakness and Luther absolutely had no room for weakness. He had hit that quota enough today for a lifetime. And he can’t talk about the tree. Dad said so.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Luther mumbled.

Vanya’s stomach dropped. Whatever this is, whatever Luther isn’t saying, is something they don’t know about and there’s a reason for that. They all had experiences with their father they didn’t want to share. But eventually they all did. Or so she thought.

“Dad isn’t…he can’t hurt you anymore. I promise.” Vanya reassured from behind.

Luther’s grip tightened and he felt the moon shape imprints go deeper into his palms, finding the pain grounding. He deserved pain when he acted out of line.

Allison swiftly uncurled one of his fists and wrapped her hand in his. She knew that old habit of his from when they were children. She’s watched Luther dig at his palms until they were bleeding during post mission briefing sessions on more than one occasion. And she isn’t about to let her brother do that to himself again.

“This is a safe space, bro.” Klaus pressed gently, giving him an encouraging nod.

Luther sighed, glancing up and at the faces around the room. They were all watching him with a look concern. But there was more to it. He saw it in the way Klaus’ lips curled up ever so slightly, he saw it in Five’s dimple and Diego’s eyes. They weren’t going to judge him or punish him.

“Whenever I did something wrong, Dad would, he just liked that tree. And when I-I messed up he would take me there.” Luther focused on the arms around his waist and the hand in his, “At first it was a time out thing. He would exclude me from activities, which he knows I don’t like. I wanna be involved.”

“That wasn’t enough anymore I guess. I kept messing up. So he would make me fast for days on end after missions. Or Dad wanted me to throw things until my shoulders dislocated. But that wasn’t enough anymore either,” He continued, “I deserved more than that. He started to make me…help him. A-and if I did it well enough, he insisted on ‘helping me too’.” Luther’s voice was barely above a whisper once he finished. The rest of the room was silent, Luther’s IV drip being the only thing audible in the room. No one, absolutely no one, was expecting that.

Reginald was an asshole, yes. They all knew that. It was common knowledge just like how water is wet. But Reginald being a pedophile? Not only was he emotionally manipulative, but also sexually? To his own goddamn child? That was a whole other level that they were not prepared to hear. There was no way to be prepared to hear something like that.

“Luther, you did not deserve a single second of that, do you understand me?” Diego demanded, tone soft but assertive. He had to learn about sex trafficking and sexual abuse victims during the Police Academy. And he remembers how that was the most heartbreaking lesson of them all.

He learned how, especially young boys, will dismiss and refuse to acknowledge their abuse. Even more so if it was from their guardian. “You are not a bad child. You do not deserve to be treated like that. We love you, okay? Did…did Dad make you keep it a secret?”

Luther gave a short, “He said if I told anyone h-he’d kill one of you and say I did it. He said I’d go to jail for murder. But I always did it! I couldn’t let you guys get hurt…Dad loves me. He punishes me because he wants me to learn.” He said as if it didn’t need explaining, looking around the room at his siblings. He wasn’t expecting to find every single one of their eyes to be filled with tears themselves.

“I didn’t mean to upset you. I-I’m sorry if I did something to-”

“Goddammit Luther, you didn’t do anything wrong! You didn’t. You’re a good boy, okay? Such a good boy, fuck.” Vanya squeezed her brother tighter, dropping her head in the crook of his neck.

Luther froze for a moment at the outburst before feeling something within him burst open. He was…allowed to be upset. He was allowed to be angry, to be sad, to be ‘weak’. A watery sob escaped his lips and within a second he turned around to wrap his arms around Vanya. They were properly holding one another now and Vanya let her brother grab her sweater in tight fists and cry. And he did so; ugly, heart wrenching sobs came from the small boy as he was being cradled in the small woman’s arms. His shoulders shook violently with each one. The rest of the siblings watched as this intimate moment unfolded before them. They all felt their souls leave their body, their hearts crushed.

After what seemed like a lifetime, Luther was no longer shaking and his eyes were dry. No one said a word. Were there words to even say? Allison wrapped her arms around her two siblings and Klaus got up to do the same. Then Diego, Ben, and Five. All six siblings wrapped their arms around Luther. Diego kissed the top of his head and Luther simply let himself be held for a few moments before breaking up.

Luther isn’t sure what happened in the 15 years or so he’s missed nor is he even completely aware of the situation he’s in. But one thing he can say for certain is he’s grateful for his siblings. Whatever they all went through in those years he wasn’t there for, it must have been painful. It must’ve fucking hurt. Because the love he’s feeling? The pure, genuine warmth and care? He couldn’t even begin to fathom anything like it - not in his timeline anyway. And he’s so glad he’s been given the opportunity to feel even a fraction of it.

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