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#i wanna give context but i think its best if i don't
1800classiccherries · 10 months
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Slideshow!
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⚘ 1610!Miles Morales x black!fem!reader
⚘ fluff! use of n word like once, teen romance
⚘ summary: Miles and Y/n make a slideshow to convince his parents to be able to be in his room with the door closed.
⚘ wc: 631
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You and Miles were on his bed, sitting in silence a foot or so apart, which was odd because you two were never normally this awkward. Occasionally one of you would glance at the wide open door, revealing Miles's parents walking by here and there, which is why you two kept your distance.
For context, when you and Miles first started dating, you two weren't allowed in his room and had to stay in a public space like the living room; however, y'all are obnoxiously loud. When you two were playing games, loud. Even just talking, you two laughed loud. Except, when it was a movie night, it was quieter because y'all were so wrapped up in the plot.
To be honest, y'all were fine in the living room, but it was rough always being told to quiet down. The volume of you two in the same room was too much, so Miles suggested to his parents that you two go to his room instead of being confined to only the living room. Under one condition, the door stayed wide open.
And so there y'all were sitting side-by-side in a semi-awkward silence.
You feel the weight on the bed shift closer to you, and an arm makes its way over your shoulder, "Hey."
"Nigga, what?" you say without thinking at his cheesy attempt to make a move on you.
With a pout, he takes his arm off your shoulder and leans back upright, "You ruined the moment."
You giggle at his pouting, feeling a little bad about your reaction, "My bad, stink, it was a natural reflex. Try again," you offer, tossing your locs over your shoulder.
Miles clears his throat before leaning back over, putting an arm over your shoulders again.
"Hey." He says with a smirk and a tilt of his head.
"Hi," you respond, tilting your head the same way, your eyes glancing down at his lips before back up at his eyes.
"You look really pretty right now," He compliments, leaning in.
"Thank you," you whisper with a smile, leaning in as well.
You hear someone clear their throat walking past the doorway of his room, causing both of y'all to quickly move away and back into the awkward silence.
~
A week or so later--that situation happening again and again--you and Miles were on Facetime brainstorming ideas for the slideshow y'all planned to make to convince Miles's parents (mainly his mom) to let y'all have the door closed.
The both of you knew it was ambitious to shoot for something so big, so that's why you had to create the best slideshow presentation of all time.
"Okay, what do we think about this template?" you ask, turning your camera around to show a classy slideshow template.
"Perfect." he nods, and you add him to the slideshow.
~
A few days of hard work and planning go by, and it's now the day you two scheduled to present the presentation.
In preparation, the two of you coordinated your most trustworthy-looking outfits and practiced how you would present. Y'all knew you both were being extra, but at the end of the day, it didn't matter because y'all were having fun.
"Greetings, esteemed guests," Miles opens, gesturing to the title slide on tv.
You and Miles alternated presenting slides, explaining how having a door closed is reverse psychology, decreasing the chances of anything happening. Also, the classic, if the door was closed, grades would improve (don't know how, but there was a graph to prove it), along with a few other random and made-up examples.
"Thank you for your time," you close, and the two of you bow.
Following suit, his dad gives a round of applause, "That was actually pretty impressive."
His mom sighs, "We'll think about it."
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Thanks for reading!
Ngl i wanna do a part two but at the same time i dont know if it'd be any good... if youd be interested in part two lmk
part 2
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bulbabutt · 10 months
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ok i wanna talk about tmnt 2007 and the way i think this is the best version of a leo and raph conflict, and also leo as a character
for context i've been talking about tmnt things kinda chronologically, so i'm gonna mention an unconditional understanding in 03 i bring that up in a previous post about that show and the family dynamics in it here if u want context for what i mean
i think this movie can really be appreciated for the place it has between adaptations, and the way character-wise everyone is more or less the same as they've always been but with a more interpersonal relationship as the focus. the main villain of this movie doesn't really matter, the conflict, the fights, that's not where the strength is (although, it is reflected in the conflict and ill get into that)
so tmnt 07 is one movie that kind of combines the 90s movies, 03, and mirage all in one place, and tonally is is similar to the show that will come after it, 12. if the 90s movies give us conflict between leo and raph, and 03 gives us the unconditional understanding between the two, 07 takes these two aspects and creates a story out of it. (debate in your own mind if this movie is a literal sequel to the 90s ones or not, its not that important)
the set up of this movie is we are in a post killing the shredder world. leo has been told by splinter to go get training elsewhere, there isn't much context for what happened to cause this, but i would bet its a similar cause to 03, where he had ptsd and lashed out at his father to which splinter sends him to his grandfather to get better advice than he thinks he can give him. the difference here is there is no grandfather hes sent to, he's sent on a journey of self discovery around the world to learn about it and himself.
the thing about leo as a character, and this goes for all leos, he's has a very black and white way of thinking. leo thinks he's been sent away because he's failing his family, that he's not a good enough leader. so he stays away for longer because he doesn't feel good enough. he finds a place where he can help and he does that. leo always needs a bad guy to fight, or else he's fighting his own demons. so he stays there for a long time. finding a place he can help quietly, never letting anyone see him, and becoming a legend to the locals because no one knows what's really going down.
april manages to track him down and tell him about whats going on with his brothers, how they're holding up without him and without being a team, and i think thats a good reminder for him that they miss him. he doesn't tell april but he finds a way home only after hearing about this. when he arrives and speaks to splinter, he says "i was so caught up in my own world i forgot about everyone else, i'm sorry i failed" he still doesn't feel like he's done anything of worth.
i'm gonna jump in here and say, you know how we all love rise raph? cuz hes the big brother and some traits that come from that are like being overprotective and taking on everyone else's problems and trying to handle emotions alone? well that's a trait thats usually leo's. but the difference with leo is sometimes that concept doesn't make you as likeable. sometimes it means you come off like a nagging mother hen who thinks they know best but in an arrogant way. sometimes it makes you mirror being a parent when no one asked you to be. leo's less of a passionate character than raph, hes more analytical and full of himself. he takes splinters lessons more seriously, and hes always trying to do whats best for everyone so they don't have to worry. this is something evident with 03 and 12, but its so specifically noticeable here because these traits make up the main conflict. i just want to bring that up so we start seeing leo as no different than some of our other favourite iterations.
splinter responds to his apology by saying "you owe me no apology, but perhaps you should talk to raphael, your absence has been particularly difficult for him, though he'll never admit it" but when leo greets him raph is brushing him off.
on raph's end, this is him being angry that leo left, and angry that hes back and everyone wants to pretend that he wasn't gone at all. as if the time he was gone didn't happen. hes lashing out because he too cant handle talking about these emotions. and hes lashing out by becoming a vigilante in his own right.
i see a lot of people misunderstand what raph is doing here, that "this is what the turtles always do" or "this is the same as what leo was doing how could he be mad" when that is not true. that's what casey does. its true that both leo and raph have been fighting bad guys on their own (as a way of dealing with their issues) but raphael has made himself a costume to disguise himself which means hes prepared to be seen. hes riding a motorcycle around, which is loud. this isn't stealthy, this is aggressive. his vigilante name is in the news. the turtles are ninjas, they silently help where they can and fade into the night and, very specifically, they work as a team. these turtles live in a dangerous world, what if something happened to him while no one else was around? they would never know because he never told anyone.
so raph is lashing out, and leo doesn't have a good way of dealing with it. he tries to slide back into being leader, doing what splinter says but he forgets how his brothers are, and with raph egging them on they get into fights they shouldn't. which leo specifically gets in trouble for, as the oldest brother, and as their leader. leo tries to be this better leader hes supposed to have learned to be, but it doesn't work and raph ends up back out there in his vigilante get up. leo tracks down said vigilante, and in his peak "leo knows best" moment, lectures him, not knowing its his brother. there's a scuffle, and the mask comes off. let me point out that casey knew this vigilante was raph but his own brother didn't, because leo has been gone that long.
so lets get into what this fight is really about. on the surface, its "wow you've been going out at night alone putting yourself in dangerous situations with no backup" and "so what you're just mad that i can do it without you" which leo would be right about. and this is the analytical leo, he really thinks that's all that's going on here. what hes missing is that raphael has missed him as a brother, and hes hurt that leonardo left and just came back no big deal. that he wants everything to be normal. raphael is always a character with big emotions and the only outlet he knows to express them is violence.
leo, who as we've established, went away to learn to be better for his family is angry that raph doesn't see that. he's mad raph doesn't appreciate the effort he went to, and he thinks he's just angry because he's not in charge. each brother sees the other as being arrogant.
this leads them to the big fight. no one can disagree that this is the best part of the movie (seriously watch the movie for this scene if you haven't seen it before) , but the real best part of it is that raphael wins. raph proves hes just as capable of a fighter as his brother, if not more-so. he uses those sais as they're supposed to be used, catching leo's swords and in a fit of rage he fucking breaks them, leaving leo defenceless and completely vulnerable to attack. you'd think he'd be smug that leo lost but he pauses, going through a lot of emotions in a moment, questioning what he's doing, why hes doing it. and leo finally looks his brother in the eye and sees raph going through something he didn't before, realizing raph hasn't been angry that he's back, but that he's angry that he ever left. they don't have a conversation, because raph cant handle all these emotions and he runs away, crying as he does. leo just watches him, taking it all in and realizing the error of his ways.
hearing leo scream turns raph around, but he's too late to help him, and this is where raph regrets his own actions because right then, leo is also proven right in his argument. because he gets kidnapped. if leo hadn't chased raph down, there is a very good chance that would have been raph being kidnapped. with no backup, with no one knowing what happened to him. that's why its important that the turtles are a team.
raph goes home full of guilt, and there's a good moment of showing how he cannot open up emotionally here, because he grunts, punches the wall, knocks over some weights and forces splinter to ask him what happened, because that's how raphael is. he laments to his father that he finally understands why leo is the better son, proving that to raph none of this was about their team, but about their family. conflating the two ideas in his head. splinter gives him a talk that mirrors what he said to leo when he returned earlier in the movie, encouraging him that he is a good son and brother. this shows that these brothers have very similar insecurities about their value to their family.
the rest of the movie plays out as you expect, they go save leo, they stop the bad guy, they reconcile and behave as the team they're supposed to be. but i just want to point out that the villains plot is mirrored in leo and raph's conflict. the 'villain' here is a brother who has been cursed to be immortal without his own siblings. for 3000 years he lived to regret his actions and decided to undo his curse, but he used the cursed stone versions of his siblings to do so. no communication, just thinking he knew better (which maybe he did) and lying about it. that caused them to lie to him right back, and try to overthrow him and destroy the world. this is just one family whose inner turmoil could have destroyed the world. you might say, oh that's not a very interesting turtles villain, but its not supposed to be. its not the focus.
this movie is all about the complicated relationship between a family, and i see so many people talk about it by trying to ask who's right and who's wrong. that's not how it works. life is more complicated than that, people are more complicated than that. its boring to look at this movie and just say "leo is wrong and raph is right" because that's not even how the characters see it. this movie is about leo and raph being mirrors of each other in their arrogance, in their insecurities, and in their stubborn pig-headed refusal to let the other know how they feel. splinter says as much at the start of the movie. this whole movie shows that without each other, they need to be fighting something so they don't get swept up by their own emotions, which they are both bad at processing. they are SUCH brothers. they are so similar emotionally, yet they have such a hard time understanding each other.
personally 07 leo is my favourite leo for his complexity, his flaws his strength, his growth. its sad we never got those sequel movies to get into the other brothers heads as much as we got into leo and raphs heads.
also nolan north and james arnold taylor gave the best vocal performances in this movie and they deserve all the credit for it.
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orionsangel86 · 9 days
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Content Filters - Your New Best Friend!
I dont think we take advantage of content filters enough. So I'm putting together a little tutorial in case anyone isn't aware of them.
Now we may all be aware of tag filters, both via tumblr saviour and also tumblrs in built tag filtration system.
But that still runs into issues as some people just dont tag their posts, and therefore some posts will still find their way to the dashboards of people that dont want to see certain content that they have blocked.
If you are in a small fandom, sometimes popular content that you arent interested in can become quite prevailent and unavoidable even if you have tags blocked. But there IS a way to avoid that content regardless of whether people are tagging their posts or not
CONTENT FILTERS.
Content filters work by blocking certain words that appear in posts. If there is a certain thing that you really want to avoid, you can just block that word or phrase and boom! You'll never have to see it and everyone will be happier for it. If you don't know where the content filters are, I can show you. On tumblr mobile go to account settings:
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Then scroll down to "content you see":
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Here you will find the filtered tags:
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And if you're anything like me you'll have a nice long list of blocked tags to curate your feed.
However if you just scroll down to the bottom of your blocked tags list, you'll find this:
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Here is where you add words you wanna block. You can block trigger words, you can block things like "blood" if thats not your jam, you can block "omegaverse" if that gives you a squick, and you can also block ship names and names of whole fandoms if you find them annoying (blocking Supernatural may help with your mental health lmao).
It can be overzealous, so its best to block phrases more than random words as those words can be used in many contexts after all (which is why its excellent for blocking fandom ships as those are usually portmanteaus that wont appear in regular language). Blocking the word "omega" may be a bit too wide a net for instance, but blocking something like "omega Dream" will work wonders and calm those buldging temple veins.
Now this is just a tumblr app tutorial but I believe the content filters are in the same place on desktop. Its not hard to find them and I strongly suggest everyone uses them.
We all want to have a peaceful pleasant fandom experience, and as always, the best way to do that is to CURATE YOUR OWN SPACE. I'm someone who loves searching in the fandom tags, so I dont rely on following/unfollowing to curate my feed. I often expose myself to things in the tags i may prefer to avoid, or maybe I follow people for some content but dont wanna see other content they reblog. Either way, the content filters protect me from triggers, things that squick me out, and content I just find annoying.
Whilst we can all ask that people tag appropriately, it is never the OPs fault if you have seen something you don't want to see. You have all the tools available to you to avoid everything you dont like. Use them.
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lamnwar · 2 months
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Hello! Very specific request. I have a job at a Themepark, basically I work as a Disney princess there (aurora). Its for children to sort of meet their Disney role models, favorite prince/princess. I read them stories, take pictures with them, etc. Could you sort of do a headcanon-esque scenario of how the gom will react to a partner with such a job? Maybe how some of them will be mildly jealous of the assigned prince? This was so embarrasing to type out omg if your uncomfortable with any part of the request/dont wanna do this lmk! No pressure, whatsoever. Love you, stay safe!
Hiiii thanks for the request! 💕 It was such a fun one to write and omggg you gotta be extra pretty to be working as a irl disney princess 😭
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SHE'S A PRINCESS // KNB Headcanons
Context: in which you work as a theme park princess and your boyfriend feels some type of way about it
Pairing: GOM x gn! Reader (gender not specified
Warning: fluff, nothing too serious, slightly suggestive but safe for all audiences!
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AKASHI
I don't think Akashi really went to theme parks as a kid so he's probably a bit surprised to know that playing a princess there is an actual job
Literally stunned the first time he sees you in costume like, his girl is just so pretty!!!
Would come on regular visit just to see you because my man is obsessed with how gorgeous you are and how well you play the role
The way you show so much grace and you are so nice to all the people that come to you
Would be the kind to take pictures of the public with you because he absolutely gets it, you are a princess
Talking of which, "princess" progressively becomes a new nickname he uses for you
He doesn't mind that you work with another guy as your assigned prince, but if dude tries to make a pass at you, he's as good as dead 💀
Smiles softly as he looks at children coming to you thinking you're the real character
And the way you're just so sweet with these kids aaaahh! my man just falls in love even more from seeing that
MIDORIMA
To Midorima, a job's a job, so he doesn't think much of it
He took some time before visiting you at the park and actually seeing you in costume
This DEFINITELY awakens something in him, trust me
Would obviously not admit to it but he really falls even more when he sees you in your princess get-up
He would occasionally visit you, but to make sure you're doing ok and is not too exhausted
He's such a meticulous guy that he'll sometimes help you out with your costume
Got a crease on your dress? he's on it already! Need someone to curl your hair at the back? he's your man
Not even surprised by the little kids who are convinced that you are a true princess, because you absolutely look the part
But sometimes these kids would get a bit sneaky and ask you if you really love the prince
It's hard to answer that question when you know that your boyfriend is nearby and he can hear you well
But you'll just look at Shintaro while you say "yes, I do love my prince" because thinking of him is the only way you can express genuine love
KISE
That guy could easily steal your job, let's be real
I mean he's just that pretty!! no offense to you but it's just the truth
When he comes and sees you at the park, you better believe people mistake him for a prince
And when they see the both of you together? Yeah, you might as well be a real royal couple
He's your best hype man too, goes around telling everyone that you have to be the best princess of the whole theme park
Doesn't mind the guy who works with you as your assigned prince, since he knows very well that he has nothing on Kise
I mean... he really can't compete
But he might a bit pouty when you play your role a bit too well, acting lovey-dovey with your prince for the public
He gets reassured when you come to him later and give him a kiss on the cheek
Not sure if it's allowed for you to break character like that, but it really doesn't matter if it's for Kise 🤭
AOMINE
Aomine kinda makes fun of your at first when you tell him that your job is to be a (fake) princess
But he's quick to shut his mouth the first time he sees you
Like... damn, that just unlocked a new kink
You're so damn beautiful he goes mad
Obsessed with princess! you
Has beef with a 6 yo once because that kid was looking at you for a bit too long for his taste
It's kinda funny because he's being ridiculous, but still
At first, very much against you having to work with another dude, especially when you have to play pretend a couple
But it doesn't last long because you told him once you're only his and it's enough to switch his mind
Now he brags to these kids that you're actually his
"See that gorgeous princess? Yeah she's in love with me"
"But what about the prince?"
"She loves me more than the prince"
A big PR disaster for the park, btw, but he couldn't care less
The most beautiful princess in the park is his, and he'll never lie about it
MURASAKIBARA
Very intrigued by that job of yours
What do you mean, you get paid to be a princess?
Honestly looking at him, you're confident he can book a job as a pretend royal
His physique is very prince-like, can't say that much about his personality
Anyways!
Comes to the park often so he gets to see you + eat nice snacks!!
Buys you food too when he's here, so you do not starve
Nods in agreement every time a kid points at you all impressed
"Yeah, she's indeed the prettiest"
Plays the game and tells people that you *are* a real princess
Weirdly enough, he gets hungry seeing you in costume
I mean that puffy pastel dress? Girl, you look like a pastry
Doesn't really like you working with a prince
He just doesn't get it! Like, what do you need a prince for? People like the princess more anyway
Even when you tell him it's part of the act, he's pouty about it
It's cute though, in its own way!
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my thoughts on spooky month 6
copy pasted from a page and a half of google doc. crying. spoilers inbound.putting it under the cut cuz its super long. also swear warning.
Ok to start off LILA. LILA MY GAL NO UR DOING UR BEST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Im crying im actually fucginf crying. She's trying. So hard. Skid is trying so hard. THEY'RE DOING THEIR BEST PLEASEEEEE. Father Gregor can go EAT SHIT. THEY'RE TRYING AND THAT'S WHAT COUNTS GODDAMNIT.
Susie… Susie no… please… she deserves better istgggggg. What happened to their parents? Are they actually just busy? Are they DEAD? Holy shit what if they're dead. Poor Pump, poor Susie, god please just let these kiddos be ok. PLEASE. ABUELO WONDER IS TYING SO HARD BUT SUSIE KNOWS IT ISN'T REALLY FROM HER PARENTS IM CRYING. SUSIE NOOOOOO
FATHER GREGOR I HATE YOU. ok well he obvs did some good but STILL. GREGOR. STFU GREGOR. I get that hes trying but U CANT JUST SAY ALL THAT SHIT ABOUT JUDGEMENT AND THEN JUDGE HER HER FUCKING HOUSE GOT BROKEN INTO!! YOU DONT HAVE THE FUCKING CONTEXT!!!! ARGHFDGHJSGHJKAGHSD. Also DAMN IS HE A CULTIST NOW?? IS HE DEAD?? WHAT?!?!?!
ROYYYYYY ROY MY BOI NOOOOOO poor guy :( i understand why he hates the kids they DID kinda ruin him so. At least he knows theyre trying now :( and ross n rob just ASSUME he did something bad isnt helping here!!!! I get that theyre also trying to help him and its nice to see him opening up to them about stuff (even if we dont get to know what specifically PELO WHY) but PLEASE get this kid an anger management class or smthn PLEASE. He needs SO MUCH THERAPY. I dont think hes gonna get therapy because im pretty sure his parents are Part Of The Problem but STILL.  Also FUCKER LITERALLY GOT POSSESED BY A DEMON?????? THATS GOTTA BE TRAUMATIC TF
Side note i love ross and robert dearly and i appreciate them doing their best to help on both sides i love them smmmmmm AUGH
KEVIN AND RADFORD FRIENDSHIP REALLLLLLLLLL i am SO fucking happy about that!!!! Also Kevin having conflicted feelings on the kids FAIR. Similar thing to Roy except hes an adult with a semi-functional support network and is able to understand that theyre just dumb kids and they dont actually mean any harm. He’s harsher on the hatzgang cuz theyre teens and old enough to know stealing is wrong but Skid n Pump are little kiddos they dont know better. Also him disapproving of father gregor REAL THO. also HE GOT POSSESSED TOO?? TRAUMA CENTRAL HOLY SHIT
PATTY DESERVES TO HAVE A GUN ACTUALLY. Also JOHN ANGST JOHN ANGST JOHN ANGST! IS HIS KID DEAD? IS HIS DAUGHTER OK HOLY SHIT. ALSO THEM HELPING THE KIDS PROPERLY IM CRYIG AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
WHAT WAS EVERMORE DOING WITH THE HOBOMEN???? HELLO??????
I SAW THAT CULT NECKLACE UNDER IGNACIOS SHIRT. I FUCKING SAW IT. CALLED IT BITCH!!!!!!
Rick just has the WORST luck lmao
STREBER IS ALIVE LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOO
DEXTER NO PLEASE AUGH…… HIS MOM TOO……
JAUNE AND ROSS’S DAD… HE'S REAL HE EXISTS!! I get ur trying jaune but that is NOT the best way to comfort poor lila… AT LEAST SHES TRYING THO I APPRECIATE HER
THE ENTIRE NEWGROUNDS ENDING?? THE THIEVES AND THE CANDY DEALER IN CAHOOTS WITH THE CULT???? HELLO??????
MOLOCH IS GONE. he deserved it but also THE KIDS ARE SO SAD ABOUT IT? Like they don't really get it but they just watched someone they thought was their friend DIE. HOLY SHIT.
finally. SKID AND PUMP. KIDDOS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ok for real tho theyre so much more self aware than the fandom and bulk of the show give them credit for?? Like Skid is VERY aware of his dad being dead/possibly missing and legit just doesn’t wanna talk about it. He knows what death is and he finds fun in it to cope. My poor sweet boyo… and PUMP. PUMP ANSWERING THE CALL AUGHHHHHH HE WANTS HIS PARENTS BACK IM CRYING. SUSIE AND ABUELO ARE DOING THEIR BEST AND HE'S TRYING SO HARD AND AAAAAAAAAAUGH. Also him getting possessed by Moloch while having Star-Eyes basically debunks the theory of the Star-Eyes being a form of possession which is FASCINATING. Anyway that scene with Susie and Pump got me misty eyed and then during the ending with Skid and Lila i actually genuinely started crying. I just want them to be happy. Please let them be happy. Please. PLEASE.
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julianalvarez9 · 1 year
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we need to talk / christian pulisic
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request: heyyy idk if your still taking requests but i rlly wanna see an imagine on christian and his girl bestie argue after she hears him say that he wouldnt date her to his guy friends and she comes downstairs and ignores all of them and dosnt speak to him for a while and when he does its all fuff x
summary: you ended up hearing something you wish you never did. maybe you shouldn't have been eavesdropping, or maybe you should have addressed the situation before it got until this point.
word count: 1.7k words
warnings: mention of the pandemic (briefly, just to give context to their relationship), declan being kind of a dick??? but not really
author's note: so i don't know if you meant for it to be best friends to lovers but since it's apparently all i can write about, here it is <3
christian and you had been living together since early 2020, right before the lockdown started. you had been having trouble finding another flat that was close to your job, and with your lease coming to an end soon, your best friend had the marvelous idea of sharing his home with you, for however long you needed. at first, you had opposed, not wanting to intrude in his personal space, but he reassured you each time, saying that he was away too often anyways so you wouldn’t even notice him. and he had been right, for the most part, until the pandemic hit and you two were forced to stay home. it wasn’t an issue, really, even though at first it worried you. would he get tired of seeing your face every day? would you get under his skin and bother him too much?
when life started getting back to normal, you tried talking to him about moving out, not wanting to bother him that much, but he completely refused, threatening to stop talking to you for s month if you went away. that's how you had ended up being his flatmate for almost three years now, and you couldn't complain, since it was incredibly easy to live with him.
you had been in your room all evening, waiting for him to come back after his recent trip to manchester, but decided to start making dinner before he arrived. about thirty minutes later, when you had chopped every vegetable you needed for the meal, you heard the keys unlocking the door, and just as you were about to go out to greet him, another set of voices alerted you that he wasn’t alone. christian thought that you weren’t home since the lights in the living room were turned off, and that’s usually where you used to be when he came back. he didn’t even think about checking the other rooms, too wrapped in whatever exchange the young american player was having with his teammate.
“i don’t know how you didn’t get with her yet. you’re taking your time, man” the other man joked, presumingly, to christian. you couldn’t really tell, since you weren’t actually seeing them, just hearing the voices that came into the room. to be honest, you didn’t even want to eavesdrop, but god, they were being so loud.
the chelsea player replied, and you could almost picture him shaking off his head like he does when you tell him a bad joke. “she doesn’t want me like that”, he said, and now you were curious to know who he was talking about, since he didn’t tell you anything about his newest romantic interest. the other voice retorted, not even a second after, “i’m sure 70% of the world population would want you like that.
god, how you wished to be in your room, comfortably tucked into bed watching something on the tv. maybe then you wouldn’t be hearing whatever witty remark his fellow footballer was making. it wasn’t news to you that, yeah, there were plenty of people who would want to sleep with them, but it didn’t seem right to you to hear how they bluffed about it. you wished that christian would stop him from going any further.
you were standing still in the kitchen, afraid that any movement you could make would alert them of your presence, and thus, discovering that you had been hearing everything they said. you figured from the sound that they were now seated on the couch, and you knew that there was no way that they wouldn't see you if you were to escape right now from the kitchen.
“no, i wouldn’t. she’s only my best friend, declan”.
“i guess she’s part of the other 30%” christian said, and you could hear the smile in his voice. he continued. “you don’t know her. she’s special, mate”. you felt the little tug in your heart, but tried to ignore it, since you were glad that your best friend at least had some kind of respect when talking about his romantic interest. the man laughed, like he had said something unbelievable. “so you wouldn’t date her if you could?”.
oh.
the cold that had invaded your whole body after hearing what he said had made you unable to continue hearing what they talked about, even if you wanted to. thinking straight, you didn’t have any reason to get mad at christian referring to you as his best friend ‘cause that's what you two were: best friends. still, it was like a bucket of ice water had washed over you, like receiving shocking news that you wished you could erase.
so they were talking about you?
and god, you wished you could erase the past five minutes, and forget whatever they had said.
along with the sudden cancelation of noise, it seemed like your legs had a life of their own, and before you could ‘cancel the action’ like you used to with your sim in the famous game, you were out of the room in direction to your bedroom, where you hoped you could hide, at least, for the rest of the day.
christian was shocked to see you leaving the kitchen, after being sure you weren’t in the house. it dawned on him quite quickly that you must have heard him and declan talking, and that’s why you had run away the way you did, and closed the door harshly, making him wince on the spot.
a few minutes later, you heard him knocking on the door of your room. and even if you didn't give christian permission to enter, he still made his way into the dark room, sitting on the edge of the bed. “he’s gone” he whispered, afraid to talk any louder than a mumble. he knew you were awake, even if you weren't facing him, only by hearing the sound of your breath. after spending so many nights sleeping together, you had grown accustomed to his warmth and learned the pattern of his breath, just like he had learned yours.
a few minutes later, once he realized that you weren't actually going to answer him, he continued. “i only said that to get them off my back”. you huffed, clearly not buying whatever he was excusing himself with, and turning to look at him, even in the dark, you muttered. “you don’t need to explain anything to me. i’m only your best friend, remember? nothing more”.
“y/n, we need to talk”.
in the last couple of months the relationship you had with your best friend had turned more… complicated, to say the least. you noticed that he had been putting more effort in your friendship lately, being the one to initiate movie nights and helping you prepare dinner when he was at home. at first, you brushed it off as normal things flatmates did for each other, right? but when his absence during away games started to weigh more, and you found yourself giggling like a schoolgirl at every message you received from him with variations of “hey, i sent you this because it made me think of you”, you thought that you needed to stop the feeling that was brewing inside you, fighting to not be silenced, instead, to be screamed for every awake soul to hear.
of course, you knew better than to fall for christian, so you never actually talked about it. never showing you cared, not even when he presented girlfriends, or he talked with you about the new girl he had been messaging later. so it was weird to you how the anger had slipped upon every self-controlled barrier you carefully placed to avoid getting caught, and was presented to the american player to dissect and inspect.
you heard his shuffling, and figured that he was anxiously brushing his hand through his hair, not knowing how to say what he truly wanted to. he managed to say “you know it’s not like that”, which came out sounding a bit broken due to how dry his throat had gotten in the past minutes. you repositioned in your bed, back against the headboard while crossing your legs over eachother. “how is it then? since you seem to know everything about us, christian” you bitterly said.
you knew that christian needed the psychical contact to keep his nerves even, so when he reached to touch your knee for reassurance and you didn't move away, it felt to him like he could actually get this right.
even when you were about to tear up at hearing the sweet words that your supposed best friend was speaking, he continued, trying to make his point clear. "that's why i haven't been with anybody else. I don't want to be with anyone that isn't you, y/n. you get it, right? i know you feel the same" he looks at you with pleading eyes, and even in the darkness of the room you can see his eyes glistening thanks to the moonlight illuminating his features. still,you were caught up in what he had said previously. "why did you say what you said then? why did you sound like the idea disgusted you that much?". christian let out a breath, cursing himself for not searching for you before he let his friend continue with his meaningless topic.
“you know it’s you. it’s us. you must know”.
"I want to be with you, truly. long term." he reassured, now coming closer to you so he could hold your hand that was resting over your knee. "declan wasn't talking long term when he referred to date. he knows how i get when the guys talk about you, he was just trying to piss me off".
"i didn't plan to tell you how i felt in the darkness of your room, to be honest" christian laughed, trying to lift of the mood a little. when you giggled in return, he bowed his head to give your hand a kiss, and he stayed there once you started caressing his hair with your other hand. "what if you help me make dinner and then i tell you how i feel?" you suggested, smiling brightly at him even if he wasn't looking at your face to see it. the american nodded, enthusiastically waiting to get some food into his stomach. after all, he had came home an hour ago and due to the little misunderstanding that you had, he hadn't ingested anything since the little protein bar he had eaten during training.
"please. i'm starving".
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reinedeslys-central · 2 months
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tbh I keep seeing the takes of ppl (and ballister) about ambrosius thinking he would kill the queen but not play freestyle jazz - and it totally makes sense and all with all the context -
BUT. I just wanna point out.
the look of indecision and shock/surprise on his face every time he sees bal after the incident, and even during the incident? the split second where he considers the other knights about to turn on him for knowing his partner best and steps up to lead the search saying 'before anyone gets hurt'? like say all you will (and I agree), but that scene to me reads exactly like someone trying to get to their lover first and protect them and prove their innocence before others can convict them sans trial (looking at you wangxian) OR, also, the realisation that you have to play it safe because the community has found out your lover is queer and the pitchforks are high, but you've always been the golden child / carrying a legacy, and you make the instinctive decision to stay safe for a multitude of reasons (after all, you can't shelter them by losing your rep too, can you? or so you think. same thing in the 'prom' teen-movie btw which is a whole thing to unpack on another day but this same theme is there!).
the first time he looks like he's against bal is after the director proclaims him leader of the search - and compared to his expressions all before then, it feels so much like a mask (mask-esque. not fake, just.. if you get what I mean? I don't really have the words this is just a brain vomit anyway, insert long discussion abt masks and conflicting emotions here ig) and it cracks immediately when he sees him breaking out of jail with nimona in the hallway. and honestly I'm down to give him a little slack after that because, comedically, he totally walked in RIGHT after ballister talked about murdering everyone, and then our boi didn't even manage to blurt out that he was innocent they just got caught up angstily staring at each other. which. :)
even in all the scenes that come after - yeah, definitely can see the totally-thought-he-was-the-killer-ambrosius-why-are-you-like-this angle. and i agree. bad moves all around, dude. but! my man lowering his crossbow in the market? I don't know about you but that doesn't look like a someone who's only holding back because he loves the target. that's a guy that looks unsure about the process the whole way through the scene. (bit of a stretch I know) and the thing that ties it together is the conversation with the director in the car. when he talks about feeling unsure of his legacy? the moment with the crowd and autograph? feeling like a traitor to his personal beliefs and the institution he was raised for? the hope, trying to discreetly make it to the car? it's all there, man. he's isolated from the only person that thinks differently, still outwardly pretending he's 100% with the institute's actions and lashing out with the things that still make sense and overlap with both mindsets.
yeah, ambrosius definitely messed up (ex. 1: arm-chopping as a love language of brainwashing omg pure gold) but? every step makes sense. i'd cut anyone a bit of slack for the doubt and wanting to reconcile their life when everything's turned on its head, especially after hearing bf in question saying he wants to murder everyone ^v^
and also i just. this movie is SO COOL for somehow touching on so many themes so core to so many peoples' experiences. TT y'all please go watch it it's free on yt until feb 26 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4CFWTYFRlw
definitely going to read the comic as soon as I can - I know it's supposed to be way darker, more subtle, with an ambiguous ending but that's it, so excited to see the original spin on this story :))
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vro0m · 7 months
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Brocedes hasnt been brocedes all year. Its just a lot more ovi now. We got a certified nico lewis situation at merc. Toto picking the wrong guy once again. Whats new?
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Okay first of all I wanna say this can't be a Nico - Lewis situation. There will never be a Nico - Lewis situation again. But I guess what you mean is there's an open, direct rivalry at Merc again. Which. Yeah sure. That's usually what happens. I'm not surprised it's happening, we mentioned it before.
(long post)
I'm not sure what you mean by 'Toto picking the wrong guy once again'. If you mean in the context of hiring George, I disagree because George is a very good driver. If you mean in the race, I highly doubt Toto is the one making the strategy calls in the middle of things. At the very most, the strategists tell him the options and he might green-light one of them.
They've been having strategy issues for a while now. That's also something we've talked about before. If anything, I'd say the issue lies with the strategy team rather than Toto or George. We've said the bad calls were hidden by the good car performance before but also I do think it's gotten worse. Back when it was announced that Vowles was leaving, I said not directly replacing him was bullshit. They claimed the rest of the department would just divide Vowles' workload between themselves. Toto said they'd been doing it already during the '22 season (when did the strategy issues ramp up? idk). What I said at the time was "someone is going to have to make the final decision on strategy" and "otherwise it's not gonna work". It might just not be working.
One thing I'll give credit to George for is that he's trying things. Hasn't there been a convo in the last few weeks with people (including me iirc) saying Merc is too conservative with the strategy? That they need to stop acting like they're at the front, defending rather than behind, chasing? Also isn't it kinda boring when the team doesn't give the car that's qualified behind a chance and only uses it to support the other? (Also with his quali performances lately, wouldn't that do more harm to Lewis than George?) I guess it's just the way being a fan goes, but I feel like every race weekend I see fans of either driver defending what or complaining about what they were complaining about or defending the previous race, depending on who they're rooting for the most. It's okay when it's their blorbo only (which again : just being a fan).
Anyway props to George for being a driver, and asking for more. That's his job. Sometimes it annoys me ngl. Sometimes I feel like he's acting too entitled during the races. But as I also said before, it's not particularly unexpected from a young driver. Lewis was really not that different in his days lol. They all have a chip on their shoulder and they are all essentially starving egotistical cunts. The older ones might just have learnt to hide it slightly better through the years. Slightly. Is Lewis being more of a team player? On track, probably so, props to him for that. Don't know how long it's gonna last in these conditions though, given that he's also a starving egotistical cunt. Off track, he's complaining very loudly and unsubtly about not being prioritised by the team in a not-so-great way imo. I'm repeating myself yet again but it's not as easy as just saying here's what needs fixing with the car, then claiming they're not listening to him when it doesn't suddenly work. Merc is truly fumbling with the development, and patience is not Lewis' greatest virtue lol. He's clearly getting frustrated with the performance, understandably so. I'm simultaneously pretty sure that's true for the whole team, not just him. So him saying they're not doing their best and voluntarily just not doing what he wants is probably not helping.
I do think that the team is gonna have to find a way to make it work between them two on track before they take each other out or straight up disobey team orders out of hunger or frustration. But well. Do I have to link the essay again? (Sorry for bringing it up 10 times a week.) It's not that easy managing intra-team rivalries and I see some people claiming they should pick a n°1 driver but how? Right now, Lewis and George are on par in quali (8-8). George has less points for sure but you also gotta take into account that he's had four terrible races in the year, not always by his fault (although sometimes yes). Outside of these four races, their results are very similar. This is not a Max-Perez type of gap by far. Lewis is most probably not gonna stay for 10 more years despite what he sometimes likes to pretend, George might. I'm still rooting for Lewis first and everybody else second but if you look at this realistically, it's not as simple as saying to George "look we're betting on you for the future, someday, but until Lewis retires you'll always be a second thought to us. But you know, still stay with us and take it lying down. Toodles!" He's completely right about it, but it's easier for Lewis to say "we're fighting for the team not for driver points" when he's the one ahead in the standings. Because what? You always always have to do better than your teammate. (Again, sorry for bringing it up constantly.)
In some way the issue with both of them is impatience. Lewis is impatient to have a good car again and he's starting to somewhat take it out on the team which isn't ideal. For all they looove saying we win and we lose together, that's not a supportive behavior claiming publicly they're just not listening to him. George is impatient to get track position and to beat his team-mate and he's rushing the racing too much, making rookie mistakes in the process (see Singapore) and demanding sometimes more than his due during races.
So yeah I think they need to rein them both in — one off track, one on track — but also without rejecting all new ideas and all questioning, both when it comes to the car and when it comes to the race strategy. It's not gonna be easy, but it's definitely gonna be very interesting.
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DR3 episode 10 Makoto Vs Munakata BREAKDOWN
recently someone else made a post about Makoto's feral-ness during the showdown he had with Munakata in episode 10, of course it's quite cool, but i feel some may take it the wrong way so i wanna set the record strait and also gush about stuff i love in that scene that people may not notice so first lets lay some context
future arc episode 10: prior to this Munakata has gone on a downward spiral of insanity being a knight templar and that his way is the right way and that he must kill all despair meaning everyone he even practically killed Juzo and even before his full berserk mode he was highly aggressive and hostile towards Makoto not listening to his words at all and belittling him, in short at the time he was far from "a reasonable folk" and Makoto at the time just had his girlfriend friend Kyoko die in which Munakata challenged him to a once and for all face off, in which Makoto bears his will and steady's himself, though being open about the pain in his heart of her apparent passing and this is important as his heart is his most powerful weapon ok now lets start
so we start with the precursor as Makoto walks to Munakata and they think over their ideologies. and how Munakata wants to pull a "kill them to save them" with Makoto and everyone cause he thinks despair must be destroyed and you know its interesting cause then Makoto says
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i remember it shaking me how steadfast and determined he was, to stop Munakata at all cost but i just want to point out something from here on out that i feel is very important to what we shall be seeing
Makoto Planed all this
not the before stuff i mean as soon as he walked in that room he knew what he would say and what he would do, he had his end goal in mind he even says so near the climax with the doors but even before that he planned what would happen prior it may not seem like it due to how he always seemed on the losing side and sure he probably didn't plan to get beaten up so much but he still knew what he would do and how he would do it, and people don't talk about that much but this all shows how Makoto is much more intelligent then we give him credit for, but I'll explain as we go on
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so then we start Makoto steps on glass to alert Munakatas attention, you can tell it's on purposes as there's no indicator of uncertainty or fear on Makoto's part, it's to say "i am here lets end this" as when Munakata speaks makoto still stands strong not faltering or fumbling. then he says "i wont hesitate anymore" makoto will face munakata head on and do what he needs to but even then befor anything he trys to talk down munakata saying how killing eachother is pointless and that they can still work together
of course munakata doesn't listen but no one can say Makoto didn't try
and that's when the chase begins, but who's the hunter and who's the hunted? that's what one must ask
so though munakata attacks makoto runs out closing the door as it's revealed in the end makoto knows munakata can't open doors and uses this to his advantage drawing distance and gaining time to make his next move, as
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open door which of course Munakata knows is a set up,
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but jokes on him makoto knew he would know it's a set up, or not, it's a win win either way because if he didn't know
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deep fried zealot on the barbie! but since he did know he survived which leads to the next phase of makotos plan. and if any of you are wondering why makoto would do such a thing
he was always feral! he just didn't have much chance to act on it because he's polite and sees the good in people, but even he has his limits, so you best start appreciating the kindness Makoto shows in you when he does, well on to phase 2!
cause munakata survives with his sword and shoots makoto with tengans weapon which hurts of course so makoto runs off as his blood leads munakata exactly where makoto wants him to be he even says so
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of course makoto knows about the fire extinguisher and he dosent just mean that but I'll bring that up in a second as we see makoto look around waiting for munakata who comes in soon after and makoto is hidden now holding the fire extinguisher to bop munakata on the head! which fails, he also throws it but that fails, now one ask if this could kill munakata but from my research it seems it would only hurt maybe konk him out as for something to hit your head and kill you it must be about 24 kg (52 lbs). for it to be lethal from arm length and the average fire extinguisher is around 5-10 pounds and as much as i like to believe makoto is this
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hes more likely this
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so that fire extinguisher is more then defiantly not killing just gonna sting maybe knock him unconscious which would be a win, but he failed but dont worry! this leads the phase 3! which brings up how before he threw it he planed on using it for its intended purpose, (which is a important part of phase 3)
because though it gets thrown away and jammed in the wall it BLOWS UP HITTING MUNAKATA IN THE BACK AND MAKEING A SMOKE SCREEN EVERYWHERE! which disorients and distracts munakata for makotos phase 3!
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JUMP HIM AND PUSH HIM IN THE HOLE!
which leads me to point out something genius The dud fire extinguisher? It was the same one that Asahina tried to use to cover their escape in episode 2. Likewise, the hole in the floor is the one Great Gozu smashed for an escape route in the same episode. In "fighting" Munakata, Makoto made use of observation, deductive reasoning, and a pretty good memory; skills that he'd honed in his own Killing Game, which Munakata had earlier derided for being too orderly compared to fighting in the real world.
which of course leads to the kicker as they are both down the hole, munakata apears to have makoto right where he wants him right there in on a silver platter for a kill, but on the contrairy, makoto has munakata right where he wants him as makoto reveals he knows munakats forbidden action, and thus makeing it so munakata cant kill him and has to listen. moral of the story
munakatas like "your plan faild i am not dead" makoto:
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this of course all leads to the epic confrontation scene
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it was with empathizing and saying these words to munakata did he finally pierce his heart and get munakata to back down...
so much for useless platitudes ay munakata?
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nblatinotails · 1 year
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I really really really wanna talk about sonic and tails individual retelling of their meeting/not meeting, it's driving me crazy ! Ok ! Quickly to clear up first, clearly these don't happen in the same universe, so clearly a lot of major components are different before we even get to see what's going on. In sonics recollection, the sky is blue, the grass is green, all is good :] cause he's there to stop a lot of the industrialization that Robotnik brings, the world isn't suffering yet. Tails flashback includes paved roads and darkned skies,,, no one to stand in the way of Robotnik, so progress trudges forward, bleak and uncaring. Ok, great, that's outta the way :]
I really wanna focus on the language they both use when describing tails, the bullies, and his life after- I think the contrast is just wild and so so so interesting to compare! Like it changes a lot of the context we view these situations in and tells a lot about the character that's speaking
SO
Sonic tells it this way: Tails was a 'happy, brainy fox' till some 'blockhead bullies' started 'picking on him for having an extra tail'. Sonic ran by and the kids 'lost interest in being jerks'. Tails began following sonic and the prime universe we know is set in motion.
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So already this is so reflective of sonics personality and how he perceived what was happening to Tails. Clearly he thinks Tails is a smart little kid, he's brainy, he's smart but he's a little guy. It's a nice term but it folds under the weight of what we usually expect tails to be described as, genius, brilliant. But the happy part is something that the story and tails himself argue against. Even in the prime universe, we know that tails was harassed relentlessly until he met sonic, we see in the flashback that this has already escalated to physical violence,, and they were just getting started. Sonic calls them 'blockheads', 'bullies' that 'pick on him', this language is tame and childish, its kinda downplays what we see, tho I don't think he meant it like that. Thats just how he sees it, it's kids teasing eachother,,, which makes sense for how an outsider would see it, no flack to him.. Or how an adult would soften a story as to not scare a kid, I don't think that's the reason, I think sonic just talks like that, but it's an interesting idea to think about how maybe he didn't wanna scare tails, or if he truly just remembers it as some harsh teasing.
But anyways, to Tails,, he's 4, he's scared and can't defend himself just yet, he can't do anything but take it and hope they leave soon. Also quick wanna point out the emphasis on an extra tail, sonic doesn't care, it's an extra, it's cool.. it's glossed over because its unimportant, just something that's included in the things that are happening, rather than being WHY they're taking place. So sonic runs by and the kids 'lose interest' in bothering tails (they get whooped and tails runs away), and Tails follows sonic, eventually becoming best friends and brothers.
A simple, friendly recap, it seems kinda sanitized,,perky. The way sonic recalls events are very straightforward and chill, I truly believe that he didn't look too far into the background of what he saw, just stopped it and carried on, bonus points for gaining a lil bro.
TAILS HOWEVER..
things are a lil different,, clearly in what happens after sonic didn't show up, but also in the way he talks about himself, his feelings, the actions taken against him.
Tails tells it like this: he was a kid, minding his business, but not his surroundings.. some creeps came along and picked on him for having ONE extra tail. He got a beating, a cycle that continued for years until he put his foot down. He used his 'cunning fox brain' to give him a real way to fight back. Now he needs no one. He takes care of himself.
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Aauuggwwwh
The emphasis on his youth, he was 4.
He knows he wasn't to blame, he was minding his own business, he didn't DO anything. But that little bit of self blaming language: I wasn't watching my surroundings. Like he's berating himself, like he could have avoided these kids finding him if he was looking out.
These creeps pick on him, cause that's what they are to him. they aren't 'blockheads', they aren't just bullies, these are older, stronger kids. They ARE creeps, they harassed him for YEARS for no reason. Except for the fact that he has ONE extra tail. Specifically 'one extra' not 'an extra', one. Because that's all it takes. So he shows them. He makes more. But before that, he gets beaten. Not picked on, not bullied, BEATEN. it AAUUGHHH it drives me crazy, look at how he perceives his bullies!!
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Like fucking monsters, chasing him in the night. I'm am not alright.
This continues for years. Chased and beaten and harassed, over and over and over again, until tails gives and makes something to protect himself, something to level the playing feild. And THIS is how he views himself while creating his augmentations.
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Another allusion to something menacing, something otherworldly. He's pulling himself up to their level, using his 'cunning fox brain'. A jab at sonics wording, yeah, but more importantly, a reference to how tails sees himself. He's NOT brainy, he has to be cunning, he had to be tricky and aware at all times. So now, he can fight back.. he's got these tools, he has his brain, he has protection. Now he doesn't need anyone else. He's grown up alone, take care of himself and his own problems.
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"DO BETTER OR STAY BITTER"
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Cr to @thespiritualgyalss
Do better or stay bitter
Table of context
1. It starts with you
2. Victim mentality
3. Self sabotage
4. Staying in the old storyIt starts with you
"Be honest with how much you let yourself suffer"
...When it comes to you giving up you need to remember that sometimes your doing this to yourself, You loop this over and over and you expect a change? It starts with you.
...Sometimes you have to be honest with yourself with how much you consistently give up.
...Discipline yourself, because if you keep doing this its gonna loop for the rest of your life. Until you see everybody getting results and you wonder why your not getting results.
Victim mentality
...When it comes to victim mentality it means when you blame everything but yourself. You do nothing to change yourself but you stay complaining why nothing works for you. Now unless your actually going through something than yes I understand why you feel terrible.
...Here's an example let's say your manifesting a specific person but every time something doesn't show in the 3D than your so quick to complain and tell people that your not with your sp. Your so quick to give up and assume that the method didn't work for you so you try again and again till you give up on everything. You always see yourself as the victim but the whole time your just not disciplining yourself.
...If you really want it you have to persist and stick to the new story seeing no movement in the 3D doesn't mean it's not working check your mindset before checking the 3D.
Self sabotage
...Sometimes it's not the circumstances that is stopping you from doing good sometimes it's yourself that is causing you to not move forward. When it comes to self sabotage you cause yourself to not wanna move forward because your scared of failure. You don't even try because your scared you will fail.
...not every unintentional doubt or thought that comes to your head is true well actually it's not true it's all within you that makes it true.
...When it comes to do something new your subconscious mind isn't use to it so of course it's gonna instantly fear and doubt. You are not crazy for feeling this way it's normal to feel this way.
...YOU GOT THIS DON'T LET YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS MIND MAKE YOU THINK YOUR DOING SOMETHING WRONG!
Staying in the old story
...STOP CONFUSING YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS MIND!!!
... Here's the thing it's ok to doubt and all of that but if you keep saying "oh this isn't working" or "why isn't it working" than ofc it's not gonna work. When it comes to wanting to see movement in the 3D you have to persist and stick to the new story.
...You don't have to always have the new story mindset where you have to believe or live in the end BUT it's best to try and persist as much as you can. Basically what I'm trying to say is that don't sit around and complain about how nothings working for you and that you should give up and let the 3D do what it wants even though your the one who makes the 3D be how it is because of your mindset.
...Ways you can do this when doubting is just affirming when you feel the need to. Reminding yourself that it's yours and that everything works out in your favor. Honestly working on your self concept could help this too. DO WHATS BEST FOR YOU!
LOVE, JADE
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doobea · 9 months
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Hello! I've following your blog recently, but I like your headcanons and writing style!! Your blog is so comfortable omgomg😭😭🛐🛐🛐
Can I ask any guys from bllk with tall reader? It's just that there are so few works about the tall reader aaaaaaaaa-
Perhaps the reader's height will be about 185 cm, but plus high-soled shoes and the reader's height becomes 192 cm??
Thanks in advance!! Good luck to you and take care of yourself!!
I would prefer to remain anon, but you can call me 🍥anon if you don't mind ٩( ᐛ )و
(Sorry for my English, this language is not my native language)
omg that's so sweet of you to say!! those vibes are exactly what I wanna give off for my blog so I'm glad you think that way ;-; and omg your english is perfect dw abt it hehe - i hope you enjoy!!
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contents: tall!reader, gn!reader, sfw, like super fluffy its insane, established relationships, narration heavy, word vomit, small time-skip for bachira, 5'9 isn't small but I guess in this context it is LOL characters mentioned: bachira, nagi a/n: imma be real for a sec... irl im like 5'1 (155cm) and my bf is like 5'10.5 (179cm) so im gonna try my best to capture some height dynamics here LOL
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Some people might say that having a drastic height difference could be a bit too much and that one partner may end up feeling insecure. Bachira Meguru didn't think so. Bachira never really gave a second thought to his height nor does he care that if some might call him short - it was never a concern. But one thing he will admit is that he absolutely adores your height and how you tower over him and everyone else in the class.
The silly crush started out so small that Bachira didn't even realize it evolved into something more until the day he memorized all your small habits. He took notice of how you had to slouch more than the usual student because the small desks didn't accommodate your height. When lunch came around, you were always the first one to get up and spend at least five minutes stretching out your limbs before running to the first-floor cafe. If there was an out-of-reach item, you were essentially the designated person to go to.
And he memorized your flustered profile - the way the blood rushed to your ears, how you shuffled awkwardly and tried to cover your face with your fingers - when he first confessed to you.
"I like you, do you wanna go out?"
He loved planning sleepovers with you when you guys were living separately, often too many times he's showing up to your doorstep with a bag filled with everything but a change in clothes just so he could steal your oversized ones. "Sorry that this keeps happening." He would say, but his infectious smile would give away his true intentions. When you guys felt comfortable taking the relationship to the next phase he suggested an apartment in the city. His kleptomaniac hands wouldn't leave your t-shirts alone after that.
Teasing and play fighting are common between the two of you, mainly because Bachira loves instigating and it always ends with him tangled between your long limbs. "I'm tired, let's just stay like this for the rest of the night, yeah?"
The only downside of the height difference is whenever photos have to be taken. It's either you take up the entire frame and he has to sacrifice his half or he has to find someone to take a full body shot that always ends up blurry because no one can hold a phone still enough these days.
"Hm, I don't look good in this one." You say, scrolling through the recently filled camera roll. "They made me look like a giant next to you, Meguru."
"Guess we'll have to hire a professional next time!" Bachira chimes and prays that you don't look through his phone history where he had recently purchased two shiny rings.
⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°
There are three things that most people know about Nagi Seishiro. One, he's basically a genius without even trying it's almost scary. Two, he doesn't really talk to anyone aside from Reo. Three, he is tall. Never does a day go by where he doesn't hear people whispering all the shallow reasons about how they're jealous of his stature - the common one being how it's the perfect height to gain a woman's attraction. But relationships weren't his concern, it wasn't even in the top five things that he cared about.
Not until you transferred to his school.
You immediately caught everyone's attention. You usually stand at the same height as his best friend but, due to your added platforms, you became the tallest student in the class. It wasn't a surprise soon after that everyone wanted to give you Valentine's Day chocolate, male and female students alike. You turned all of them down.
Strange, Nagi remembers thinking but he was glad that he had more breathing room now.
Before he knew it, you were slowly integrating into his circle - which really didn't consist of much but if Reo had taken a liking to you that must mean you're a good person.
"They're just like you, except more talkative." His best friend teased and Nagi couldn't help but grow curious.
The trio hangouts later turn into 'Reo forgot he had private tutoring again so I guess it's just us'. Which then turned into 'Let's hit up the arcade after classes' to 'Wanna study for this exam back at my place' to 'Wait, are we supposed to be kissing right now'?
Right, Nagi isn't used to the concept of being in a relationship.
He wasn't exactly sure what caused his initial attraction to you, but he was glad that he didn't have to strain his neck to kiss you, he was glad that he doesn't have to second guess about placing items around your shared living space since you can easily grab it, and he was glad that he can finally experience what's it like to be a little spoon.
"I gotta use the restroom, Sei."
Nagi groans in protest and tightens the grasp he has with your arms, sinking in deeper into your chest. "Five more minutes and then you can go."
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hi! I always find your takes on things really interesting and mentally stimulating, so I'd love to know your opinion on this one: recently I came across the take (from some generally very conservative and reliable Christian theologians/bible teachers, not reddit crackpots or anything like that) that the concept of "friendship" is not biblical, but that the only really biblical structures for human relationships are within a family context, specifically marriage and siblinghood. (now, a caveat: the people discussing this were doing so within the context of a greater conversation about some odd things that have happened within the side-b movement, but I still think that's a pretty extreme claim to make at any rate?) would you have an opinion that you'd like to share about this? personally I think it's a little weird and extreme to denounce friendship as a whole amongst Christians.
Sorry I got caught up in watching this video. I consider the 3 people in it to be very decent sources, indeed, though I'm much less familiar with Christopher Yuan. I had planned to read his book but haven't read it yet.
Mrs. Butterfield has a very interesting perspective on SSA issues given her background. I don't necessarily agree with her on everything, she has a few strange takes, for example she also espouses a view on "exclusive psalmnody", that is, claiming that Christians shouldn't sing hymns or other christian music, but ONLY the psalms because they are in the Bible.
Ironically, she HAS written a lot of stuff on the need for closer Christian community and relationships, so it may be that she is here attempting to "balance" this stuff or something.
So... looking at this video they start off addressing not "friendship" as such but a very specific concept called "spiritual friendship", which is a terminology used by specific groups. Now, I hope these guys are misunderstanding what's going on here because I would love to believe the best of the folks who are a part of this movement. But what they're attacking is actually this idea promoted by an organization called ReVoice that it's a good idea for SSA people to form these "covenental" relationships with a person they're already same-sex attracted to. He also mentions that the book says some people in these relationships "embrace non-sexual romance". It's also been described by some as a "sexless marriage".
Before I get into it one other thing I like about the video is that Rosaria makes a really great point about Gnosticism and "secret knowledge". The idea that there need be this new terminology or "neologisms" and concepts whose spiritual meanings are known only to the initiated and that they can only be understood because by those who have unique personal experience is a very gnostic idea.
And one thing Christopher Yuan is very correct about is that from this (Side B) movement there is a great deal of messaging ambiguity, which is a major complaint of mine as well about that movement.
Then they get on to this part of the video where it's discussed how some people think intersex conditions existed prior to the fall, which is a bizarre claim on its surface since these people are frequently very sick from their condition, as well as obviously the "He created them male and female" line. But that's not as relevant to your concerns.
But I understand why you feel concerned about aspects of the video & the messaging.
That's because isolated from the context of SSA, none of the things mentioned are actually bad things to do with your friends. Cuddling. Celebrating important dates. Even living together, or in communal settings (as much as they dunk on it because it's inspired by the monasteries) or moving from place to place together. So when does this become unhealthy? I don't wanna give an "I know it when I see it" answer but. I think it's when a person has a temptation and they're not fleeing that temptation, instead they're trying to see how close they can get without going over.
So like yes. Individuals called to celibacy can struggle with community and need to form strong communities, and I feel like it's adding to the Bible to arbitrarily condemn the forms this takes. (That is, to condemn communal living would be adding to the Bible.) Again I feel like also this conversation is missing an honest look at pre-20th century norms which might include unrelated adults called "Uncles" or "Aunts" living with a family (surprising number of cases of unrelated household members getting, "adopted" as it were or at least that's my impression). None of this stuff should be considered intrinsically related to sexuality in my opinion. By contrast, the concept of "romance" is intrinsically related to sexuality.
(As an aside, Yuan totally butchered the term "bromance" - this is an older term that actually has nothing to do with homosexuality, it's an ironic/humorous term for an emotional or close friendship. It's fallen out of general use now because people take the idea of friendships becoming gay too seriously and therefore the ironic intent is lost.)
Then later Rosaria Butterfield gets to the part about excessive androgen production in people with XX chromosomes, and her response to this is, "Or maybe the fall just caused us to desire things that God hates". My response to this is really, "does she even know what the word intersex means"?
To me those last two points contribute to my general sense that the commentators are willing to speak without fully knowing what they're talking about.
Back on the topic of "friendship", you have to realize that even if all Christian relationships ARE to be defined in a family context, we ARE family. All Christians are brothers and sisters. So I don't see that as limiting. [maybe this is the closest thing to an answer to your original question]
Personally my views are marked by the fact that I do NOT see a smooth continuum between "friendship" and "romance", as it is not a matter of degree but of nature. That's why I say "I know it when I see it." SSA creeping into a friendship will corrupt its nature in a way that any degree of closeness will not. I don't see any way of policing this by policing people's actions. It is not an external sin, it is a sin of the heart.
However, you can often realize people's intentions based on the words that they speak. I would urge people to distinguish their conception of close friendships from this terminology related to sexuality, marriage, or romance.
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headspace-hotel · 2 years
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Hey, I'm the Native person that originally commented on the way Land Back was being talked about and how it didn't sit right with me, and I kinda want to apologize. I was mostly expressing frustration with how a lot of "revolutionary" movements in the americas that advocate mass violence as their primary praxis (a la glorious revolution shit) coopt the ideas of Land Back as a sort of "I speak for the savages and this is what they want" strawman, and I should've thought better about how people might take that frustration and run with it in some ugly directions.
I dont really wanna engage with the amount of anti-Native stuff that some people have sent in, but I did want to give you a little bit more info on what Land Back and conservation means to me specifically, and its place in my peoples beliefs. Standard disclaimer, I don't speak for all Native people.
So, Land Back is about restoring a community ecosystem that includes the land and all its people (not just humans, but animal peoples and plant peoples too) as members of society that deserve respect and care. Its about placing ourselves in the context of the world we physically exist in, so we're not removed from the physical world or the natural world or each other, as humans. And it's a movement that recognizes that for the land that people call the United States, the people who have lived here for so long have learned intimately how to be a part of this community. It's not that we're inherently special. Like, Maasai people know more about their land, and Saami people know about theirs and so on and so forth. It's literally just taking the time to learn about it and getting to know it.
As a movement, Land Back recognizes that by moving Natives from our land, we weren't losing property, we were losing all of our social context. It's not like having a bank repossess your home, it's like being forced to live on another planet, where you don't know what you can eat or where is safe or how the animals will act or when the rhythms of daily life are best.
So, Land Back recognizes that we *had* a lot of knowledge, and we still *have* a lot of knowledge, but also a lot of it got lost or was adapted to a weird new environment. It says that giving Natives back their land allows us to try to save what we still know, and relearn and restore what we lost, and also learn more!
As our community has grappled with culture loss and people moving to cities and a lot of mass trauma around blood quantum and culture, there are these ideas about like, becoming native. And I think this is what you're getting at when you talk about the Appalachians, because people who've made their home there over the past centuries have often taken the time as communities to learn the land, and to work with it. And while that obviously doesn't make them NDN, it does make them more a part of their home, the way we became a part of new landscapes when we were forced from lakes to prairies, or from islands to scrubland, or from woods to city. We had to relearn, and I believe that all migrant peoples can become parts of their land.
This is getting long so I wanted to ask that for a lot of people, land back also means a lot of really important legal things. Getting our treaties honored and getting sovereignty over the places we live means that a) we can actually put into place the knowledge that we have eco-wise, but also that we can guarantee for ourselves that the government can't punish us for speaking our languages, that they can't take our children, that they can't force us to move again and again. I don't think a lot people understand how precarious our legal existence is, and how little legal right we have just to exist as a comunity. But I felt like sharing what Land Back meant to me in terms of healing our world, natural and relationship wise, in tangible ways, and how it hurts to have it taken and used as justification for the same kind of forceful violence that has done so much harm to my community.
(Addendum. Native tribes warred, and had territorial conflicts and stuff, but like, we also had diplomacy and a lot of peace time? and it's fucking weird how that's a gotcha for denying land back when there's like, not a single community on earth that hasn't experienced some sort of inter-polity and intra-polity conflict. We still deserve for our relationship to our home to be recognized)
ok now I'm done I promise. thx 4 listening
Thanks so much for all this, I felt my mind just expand a little bit at the part about cultural context— it's like a relationship that goes both ways, right???Like it's not just simplistically "we have important wisdom about this ecosystem/community," it's "this ecosystem/community has important wisdom about us"??
That's not....really what I want to say but I guess it didn't click before that the specific community of creatures and stuff in an area is so impactful upon culture, even though it's kind of obvious.
Like even the idioms I use and the foods I like and the motifs I recognize in poems are all connected to the plants and animals I know. Dandelions have meaning to me because...they're my neighbors, kind of, and I see them doing their thing, and they are so accessible as a symbol for tenacity and flourishing in spite of hardship and resistance to power because I have a relationship with them in some small way. And also on a more concrete and practical note, I can identify venomous snakes in Kentucky, but if you put me in, idk, Peru, I would just die.
I dunno. That bit just REALLY vibed with a lot of insights I've had recently while staring at baby trees, which have made me desperate to transmit them to other people, because an understanding of belonging to a web of connections to other creatures (trees are creatures dont @ me) is SO horribly missing from most modern USamerican culture and I feel that it's literally essential to our continued survival as humans, and also I just kind of feel a piece of my soul healing every time I can recognize a plant. It's literally like seeing your friend out in public somewhere. Hi!!! I know you!!!
So yeah. I think this perspective is neat.
And...I only have even studied in any depth like a fraction of the horrors that have happened to indigenous people on this continent, and the current political panic against supposed "woke" education in schools when they're already teaching straight nationalist propaganda in many cases...terrifying. And I don't really even have anything to lose, compared to the people actually getting erased. The highschool textbook version of US history where "we did all these bad things in the past, but we fixed them all, because we're americans and americans always come to the right answer in the end!" when...uh, No...I hope people seek out other resources (not tiktok) to learn the realities, and I hope that motivates them to care about the present.
But yeah do not feel the need to apologize, this message was a breath of fresh air compared to a lot of the comments I've been getting 😅
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qweerhet · 9 months
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i just wanted to share my experience. i dont wanna go into too much identifying detail but like. one of my best friends used to be my abuser. we were in an unhealthy codependent relationship for years, both abusing alcohol to cope with our traumas, and unfortunately abusing me as well. eventually we broke up and moved into different places, and both decided to stop drinking for our own sakes. after space and time we came back together to talk and have some closure. we both missed each other as friends. we set very clear boundaries with each other, and started hanging out more in slow and small increments. we both went to therapy, and not only did i process trauma there, i also got to speak to my abuser about it. and actually be heard. its shockingly healing to hear your ex abuser say "that was so fucked up what i did, and im sorry." sometimes these memories pop up still and we kinda have an understanding that me bringing it up is to talk through it with them, not out of anger. for some reason it really helped my healing to understand what my abuser had been thinking and going through themselves during the abuse.
people really don't understand when i try to explain it to them, they look at me like am an idiot, still being abused without realizing it. im not saying it was Easy, or without road bumps. we had fights a couple of times. but now, i feel so much more healed over that trauma than any other in my life. i feel actual closure, and i trust my friend completely now. i just want people to respect that, but oftentimes they don't :(
i don't really have much to say to this--just that i appreciate you sharing this, and that i personally resonate with a lot of it. i've had a similar experience--i don't refer to it as abuse for myself, because i don't think they had hierarchical power over me and i was genuinely just as toxic and violent towards them as they were to me during the period of time that was most harmful. but it was harm, it was emotional toxicity and power games, it was a lot of mutual toxic drug abuse, and it was sexual violence towards me specifically.
and... yeah, we broke up, and moved out, and both did a lot of trauma work and processing and community building and both giving and receiving emotional aid. and eventually, we got to a place where we started being friends again and are able to talk very openly about what we did to each other and why. and hearing "that was fucked up, i'm sorry i did that, and here's why it was wrong and how i act differently now" about the sexual violence i experienced... was the only thing that got me past the sexual trauma i carried with me from that time, in the end.
that's a personal statement. it's not going to apply to everyone, or even most people. but i really appreciated your willingness to share your experience publicly, and i'd like to reciprocate in turn for once. (probably not going to do more personal life experience sharing on this blog, or at least not in more detail than i have already, but i felt like this was an important one to share in this context.)
but yeah. it's really hard when people don't respect that or treat you like you're a naive idiot.
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Writing Pattern Tag Game
@bootlegfrank tagged me and @septiccoffeefreak - who shares this post w me because we're writing partners >:3 (frank tagged us indirectly. and then directly because i responded saying i was gonna do it. so in-indirect-diretly(??))
Rules: list the first lines(s) of your last 10 fics and see if there's a pattern. I also said where each one is from in case u don't wanna scroll through our ao3 and do the math urself!!!
all these fics except one r RPF, sooo BE WARNED. i'm putting everything under da cut, and i'm also putting my reblog banner since fanfiction!!! is!!! art!!!
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Seán’s about ready to burn his entire calendar.
from "Scheduling Conflicts and How To Cope - A Guide For The Busy Homosexual"
Tommy hates LA with every fiber of his being.
from "City Of Angels"
it's cold, and it hurts.
from "The Part Where it Gets Better (Lads rescue AU)", and also THIS SOUNDS SO WEIRD OUT OF CONTEXT LIKE WHAT'S COLD??? it's water. the water is cold. this is the character based one btw. WE FOUND IT, THE NON-RPF!!!
Tommy inspects Seán’s behelit tattoo carefully, running his thumb over it a little, then kisses it.
I fucking would. kissing all his tattoos right now. mwah. this goddamn MOOD is from "There's No Place Like Home"
Ethan N3st0r was not expecting Seán to still be awake at three AM, even though with jet lag considered, he really fuckin should have.
I censored the name for search but it's not like that in the fic, that's just for tumblr. anyway, from "Three Drabbles In Which Tommy and Seán are bad at Keeping Secrets"
Ethan's the one to bring it up first, on Brain Leak, of all things.
OPENING WITH ETHAN AGAIN LMAOO. this is from "And Suddenly, It Makes Sense."
"So, who would have thought, huh? T0mmy1nn1t and Jacks3pt1c3y3, famous YouTubers, passed away in their sleep on the same night."
censored for tumblr again. from "Count your Soulmates- There's only one."
Seán and Tommy have sleepovers sometimes.
from "kissing practice". very original opening line /sar /lh (also tbh i feel awful about em being evil in this one :( I know its fanfic and i can do whatever I want but like. idk. i'm not accusing em of being mean IRL okay??? OKAY))
Seán spends about fifteen minutes pacing and staring at himself in the mirror, doing breathing exercises his therapist taught him and trying not to rub or scratch his wrists too much.
from "Puppy Love", the closest we've ever gotten to full misce posting on main
They were gluing ducks to a jeep the first time it happened.
FROM "PETNAMES" AND ALSO THE BEST OPENING LINE EVER
INTERPRETATION TIME!!!!
soooo yeah!!! we like to jump right into action as well but I think it's safe to say our autistic ass habits of giving exposition for everything lead to the specific outcome of starting in the middle of a scene, WITH an explanation of the scene. like we're already in the middle of something going on but also sometimes it's exposition at the same time somehow?? or like right after these first lines. idk maybe that's just me????
the way it's usually less (character does this) and more (character does this BECAUSE ____ // character is doing this and FEELING ____) feels like it's trying to give context, to me. but again idk maybe just me
TIME FOR SEÁN'S READING:
@septiccoffeefreak - "What I'm noticing here is more along the lines of just, how we almost always seem to open with a person. Usually by their actual name(s) too and not just a pronoun. I understand what you mean, Tommy, but I don't personally get that vibe? You could totally be right, of course, I just don't pick up on that. I defenitely notice, though, just how many of these are sentences where the literal first word is a name. the two exceptions to that are the pronoun "they" (which is still a person- or two people actually), and then water.
I guess the dialogue could also be considered an exception, but I don't think it counts since it also directly references us as characters.
and that's not something you necessarily have to do. You could open describing scenery or objects, or with dialogue that DOESN'T have the names of the characters in it- you could open with wind through a blade of grass or a character cursing under their breath or someone's cellphone crashing to the pavement or something. So it's definitely an "us" thing, it's a quirk of our writing style and not just normal writing. I don't know if like, we ALWAYS do this, but I do know that in these ten fics you pulled we do. I wouldn't be surprised if we did it like literally all the time as well, but I'm not going to pretend to know every first line we've ever penned to paper. or...print?? I don't fucking know, here, I'm just analyzing sentences on the internet for a tagging project.
Sorry if this ramble is kind of long, I hope it's at least interesting though??? sort of interesting? kind of interesting, in it's own way, hopefully. at least mildly, like a video you didn't turn on but aren't really reaching for the mouse/remote on to change it. You know?? Yeah. Like that. Or more interesting then that, hopefully. Thanks for uh, reading or, whatever, listening if you have a screen reader i guess, I'm getting nervous and it's very obvious because i'm rambling so I'm gonna hand things back off to the birthday boy, Toms. wish Tommo a happy birthday or I swear to fucking god your liver will be missing in the morning and you'll find it at the bottom of your morning cup of coffee."
back to me:
LMAO
wow omg i love my babygirl,,,, that made me laugh >:p
ANYWAYS. i didn't notice that!! oh em gee,,,,, name moment.
YOU SHOULD DO THIS TOO AND SEE IF YOUUUU SEE ANYTHING!!!!!
I'M TAGGING @kalcifers-blog AND.... no one else because all my other mutuals who i know for a fact write have paused as far as i'm aware, bc they're into mcyt RPF like I am and the w1lbvr situation put them on hiatus. and i don't know if any of them are back to feeling up to writing stuff.
I don't write about w1bvr ever and didn't watch him so I wasn't that affected but a lot of people were even if they just watched so like... Kalcie ur alone on here i'm SO SORRIE. ALSO this is /nf so u don't have to if u dont want to :p :3 >:D :000 >:PPPP :000 >:00
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