#i wanna know other peoples fanfic preferences

[vampcastellan]

forever with him, luke castellan fanfic

summary: friends to lovers, sunshine and grumpy, apollo cabin main character <3

pairing : luke castellan x fem!reader

word count: 2.5k

warning(s) : lots of plot, some cringey fluff, cute kissing moments & use of y/n

dedications: my bestfriend honeymoomin. i hope you enjoy reading, i love you minnie !!

✩ ‧₊˚ author's note: hii first time poster here but i’m so in love with luke fics so i wrote my own :)

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everyone at camp half blood knows that the apollo kids are an embodiment of sunshine and happiness. no matter what happens, they always find a reason to make those around them smile and laugh. people gravitate towards the positive energy that being an apollo kid has, and you are no different. even the angsty and moody kids seem to enjoy your presence. luke castellan is the most popular example of this.

the horn echoes in the distance as you wake up, kids slowly pile out of your cabin and walk down to the dining pavilion. mixed foods are spread out for everyone to grab and enjoy. you grab a few small items, fruit, yogurt and an apple juice before heading toward your respective table. 

all cabins have their own tables, and all cabin mates must eat with their siblings. every meal, everyday, forever until they grow up and leave. luke castellan does not follow this rule. 

his brown curls are messy and falling into his eyes, it’s obvious he didn’t sleep much the night before. he walks to grab a plate of mixed fruits and walks towards your table. chiron tried to take away dessert privileges the first few times it happened but luke didn’t care, he still wanted to sit with you. eventually it was a habit for both cabins, luke ate every meal with you instead.

“rough night?” you ask, smiling as he slips onto the bench seat beside you.

“yeah, the twins wouldn’t shut up..” he trails off, slowly piling his plate of breakfast down into his mouth. luke was the head counselor for hermes cabin, which means he didn’t get to sleep until everyone else was taken care of. 

“wanna come to mine and help me study?” you chirp up and turn to look at him, his focus is fixed on the table in front of you both. the ares kids are fighting over who has to scrub toilets after losing the capture of the flag. clarisse la rue, their head counselor is repetitively smacking one of the trouble boys on the head until he stops yelling.

“uhh maybe later? i have training duty today for the new group that showed up last week” luke replied without even turning to look at you. he continued eating his fruit and even continued onto eating some of yours as well. 

“oh it’s okay, i can just study with someone else today” you smiled at him and brushed off how different the rejection felt today. 

“okay, come find me before dinner?” luke asked as he stood up from the bench and grabbed his remaining fruit left on the plate. 

“of course!” you cheerly replied and turned to look up at luke as he hovered over you. he quickly wrapped an arm around your chest and hugged you from behind, kissing your temple before walking off toward the fire pit. every demi-god child has to offer food scraps to their parent, as a form of admiration and love. therefore, the fire pit burns every minute of every day, basically for the rest of eternity as long as camp half-blood stands alive.

and let's just say the flames weren’t the only thing burning bright red anymore.

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you decided to study with annabeth in the athena cabin since luke ditched you for counselor duties. nobody can compete with the smarts of an athena kid, but you were pretty damn close. 

annabeth was incredibly talented in basically everything, but she liked to study architecture specifically. she could ramble about the history and purpose of buildings for days. you on the other hand preferred the easier topics, like high school english and ancient greek history. 

“are you going to tell me what happened at breakfast this morning or not?” annabeth dropped her pencil down and looked straight at you. the burn of her stare was starting to become undeniable to acknowledge. 

“what are you talking about?” you sigh and glance up at her, before returning back to the textbook sitting in front of you. 

“are you seriously this clueless? luke kissed you this morning in front of everyone. you have no feelings about that?” her dead serious look made you feel slightly disoriented. you wait for a few seconds before replying back to her.

“he kissed my forehead, beth. it's not like we made out in front of the entire camp. and why exactly does this matter anyway?” you glare at her confused, squinting your eyes slightly and tilting your head in a questioned manner.

“you really are clueless, aren't you?” she took a deep breath and collected her belongings. “luke has had a crush on you for years, y/n” annabeth beams at you and then your wrist. a thin beaded best friend bracelet sat by itself. luke had made it for you after you arrived at camp, that being almost 6 years ago. he wore his matching one everyday, refusing to take it off even in combat.

“i’ll see you at dinner!” she gives you a quick side hug and then leaves you alone in the cabin to gather your thoughts and feelings. 

and staying with your feelings is exactly what you did. the rest of the day you couldn’t focus on anything but the conversation with annabeth. did luke actually like you back? and if so, how did she know before you did? everything was becoming so complicated and confusing now.

clarisse stopped you on your way toward the training fields, she wanted your help fixing up and decorating a chariot for the camp’s racing event tomorrow. you, being an apollo kid, couldn't possibly deny her request. the two of you worked together for a couple hours, mixing scraps and parts into useful weapons. after she saw how distracted you were when you began painting small hearts along the doors sides, she took a pause. normally this could have passed without question for the aphrodite cabin, but ares? absolutely not. 

“alright, who has you in a love spell y/n? i appreciate the help you know, but drawing hearts on my chariot won't go well with me or any of my siblings.” she questioned you, removing the small hand held paint brush from your grasp. 

“hmm? sorry i’ve got alot on my mind” you quickly replied, giving a sympathetic smile as blush crept onto your cheeks. clarisse looked at you for a moment, sighed, and then walked back toward her side of the cart. she threw the brush back into the pile of others before continuing whatever progress she has at making some wheels spin faster.

“the horn will sound for dinner here soon, you can leave now. thank you for the help” she yelped from beyond the chariot, smacking around parts of steel.

you close your eyes for a moment and deeply exhale. like clockwork the loud conch shell announced that it was time for all demi-god children to meet in the dining pavilion. a sudden wave of worry had overcome your mind and body. 

luke always sits with you and the rest of the apollo cabin. there was no possible way to ignore his actions, or ask him to sit with his own cabin mates. making the friendship awkward wasnt what you wanted to do. this was undeniably going to happen right now, you just needed to act calm and chill like always!

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you slowly make your way out of the forest with clouded thoughts and a funny feeling in your stomach. you meet with annabeth again as you walk past the athena cabin doors. 

“hi y/n, have you seen luke yet?” she smirks at you and wiggles her eyebrows. you stop in your tracks and turn to dead pan her. 

“please tell me you were joking earlier.” you say with a serious face, thinking there’s no possible way that THE luke castellan could ever possibly like you back. 

“wait do you not like him too? i only told you because me and percy were tired of the constant flirting and neither of you were making moves.” she stops beside you and looks at you with a confused face. her happy and fun aura has since fallen after your recent question.

“that’s the issue beth, i’ve been in love with him forever! i never in a million years thought that he could ever feel the same until now. he’s so nonchalant and only ever talks about hooking up with one of the ares kids. i didn’t think he would want someone completely opposite of his personality…” you continue to ramble on, but annabeth’s focus slowly leaves and shifts to something behind you. a pale tone overtook her face about halfway through your speech

“are you even listening to me anymore??? i'm sorry, forget it, i’ll see you at the campfire.” you begin to turn around only to be faced with none other than luke castellan himself. there’s an awkward moment of silence before he speaks up

“you’re in love with me?” he questions, a slight blush is noticeable all over his face. his hands are tucked away into his pockets nervously.

“no no it’s not like- well yes but i can explain, can we talk? alone maybe?” you try to reason with him while hinting toward annabeth to give the two of you some privacy. she kindly understands and smiles at you before walking away and down toward the pavilion. 

“we can talk on the way to my cabin, most of the kids are already sitting down for dinner so it should be empty this time around.” he offers you a smile and extends his hand towards you. without skipping a beat you lace your fingers into his and prepare to walk toward the hermes structure. the silence between you is oddly peaceful, luke’s always been really good at making people feel safe even in the most uncomfortable situations. his hands are warm and soft, his thumb is gently rubbing along your fingers as he guides the way. 

“i assume annabeth told you” he glances down at you and then back up toward the graveled path. his grip on your hand is strong, almost as if he would die if he let go.

“uh yeah, she did..” your throat is suddenly very dry and you begin to feel that funny feeling in your stomach again. 

“i can almost feel the nerves radiating off you, take a breath y/n.” he chuckles as he pulls you toward the hermes cabin doors. gently releasing your hand to open it and gesture for you to enter first. you awkwardly walk inside and head toward the corner where his bed sits. you take a seat on the edge of his bed and glance around as if it's your first time in here. even though you’ve been friends with luke for half a decade, the new found feelings are making you feel like it's your first time hanging out together. he closes the door and walks over to the bed, sitting next to you. his thighs are practically touching you, his hand brushes against yours everytime he tries to move. the tension in the room is so thick you could cut it with a butterknife. 

“so do you wanna explain what i overheard you telling annabeth..?” he offers you the chance to talk first, but he doesn't look away from your guys feet on the floor in front of you.

“how much exactly did you hear?” you question him, turning to look him in the eyes. 

“would you be alarmed if i said everything?” he peels his eyes off the floor and glances down at you. his lips are pursed into a small smirk and there's a red tint that lies on his cheeks.

“oh great” you awkwardly laugh and place your head into your heads. luke carefully wraps his hands around yours, pulling them away from your face. he makes sure not to let go of them, as he places both of your guys hands into his lap.

“i like you, y/n. i’ve always liked you, i was just waiting for you to realize it…” his eyes are soft when you look into them. you can see as his eyes dart between your own and down to your lips. the room is suddenly hot, and you feel a gravitational pull toward luke. he must feel it too because within seconds both of you are leaning in. one of his hands comes up to hold your jaw. he’s pulling you into him, and quickly you are inches away from his face. there's a quick pause in his movement before he speaks up. “are you sure you wanna do this?” the gentle look in his gaze is the same he’s always given you. this whole time he was admiring you from afar, and you had no idea until this very moment.

a radiant smile overcomes your face, you nod your head and lean into him. luke’s other hand reaches up to hold the other side of your face. 

his lips finally meet yours, and the feeling can only be described as euphoric. you’ve dreamt of this happening for years and years, but nothing could compare to the real thing. his movements are gentle, guiding you through the moment. his lips are warm and welcoming. his hands move toward the back of your neck, tilting your head to the side and deepening the kiss. 

moments pass before you finally pull back, making an attempt at catching your breath. luke, refusing to let you go, happily places small kisses over your lips and cheeks. you throw your head backwards and giggle as luke wraps his arms around you. 

“i suppose this means you definitely like me too, right?” one of his hands is gently playing with the hair that frames your face, as the other is rubbing your back. “you’d be stupid to think otherwise, luke castellan.” you respond and smile, leaning into his soft touch. he takes this moment to kiss you once more before pulling you into his chest. the two of you sit there for a few moments, enjoying the moment. 

“we should probably go to dinner before chiron sends someone looking for us” he speaks and leans up. you follow his movements and nod your head slightly. luke stands to his feet and gives you his hand, pulling you to your own feet as well. he places one more kiss on your lips before guiding the both of you toward the cabin door. 

as usual he joins you and your siblings, the apollo cabin, for dinner. this night, he sits closer to you, holding your hand under the table and drawing small circles around your fingers. every now and again, you share a look and smile before returning to the conversion happening at the table. everything feels right, and you can't wait to spend forever with him.

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#luke castellan x you #luke castellan fluff #luke castellan fic #luke castellan fanfic #luke castellan oneshot #luke castellan x fem!reader #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan imagine #charlie bushnell x reader #vampcastellanwrites

[captainfern]

fern rant below lol

yk one thing i have noticed both on tiktok, here and the rest of the internet is the “pornification” of media

by that i mean the standards people are being held to in regards of sexual attraction or just “beauty standards in general” and how there is this sudden increase of ideals and values built on the foundation of toxic pornography

i mean there are several examples, but the most common ideals you see typically relate to someone’s body and someone’s body hair and i have a bit to say on the matter, especially as someone who creates “pornographic” content

let’s talk body first

you are beautiful. it does not matter whether the internet perceives you as anything more or less than that. you are beautiful exactly the way you are

the pornification of modern media will tell you that you have to look a certain way. you will be told you can’t be plus-size, or you can’t be too skinny, or you can’t be tall, or you can’t lack curves, or you can’t have hyperpigmentation, etc. don’t listen to that bullshit

you are beautiful and i luv you

i don’t want to see negative body image portrayed in fanfic: x reader’s can be plus-size, they can be tall, they can have no curves. they are x reader for a reason !!! the reader should be described as little as possible !!!

and in saying that, yeah, your favourite fictional characters would fuck a bigger person. they’d fuck a taller person. they’d love you for you and be completely and utterly obsessed with you. “but actually— 🤓☝️” shut up please <3

now body hair

its natural !!! it grows !!!

if you don’t wanna shave, don’t shave. if you wanna shave, shave. baby it’s your choice. do what YOU want. don’t let anybody else influence you and your body

the pornification of modern media has really fucked this kind of thinking up because people (a lot of men unfortunately) think they can dictate the way people / women present themselves ??? gtfo what lmao

“body hair is nasty, body hair is unnatural, body hair is unhygienic”— honey please don’t. it’s not any of these things. body hair is completely ok (and so is not wanting it on you ofc— as long as it’s your decision, not the persuasion of anyone else)

i saw a tiktok of these guys being like “oh i’d never have sex with someone who didn’t shave” and “ew i’d never eat hairy puss” brother you literally suck (it’s ok to have preference, but don’t make it out to be vile or weird or something other people have to agree with)

it’s natural. it’s normal. it’s perfectly hygienic if you keep it that way. if you meet someone like the guys i mentioned above, they ain’t worth your time

and yeah, john price and simon riley and johnny mactavish and kyle garrick would fuck you and eat you out if you didn’t shave cause they’re MEN

love yourself because you’re beautiful and i’m telling you so right now !!!

i felt the need to say this as i write pornography. i write x readers. i try to keep everything regarding body as neutral as possible (and if i ever fuck up, please let me know !!)

i often write about “fat” or “flesh” in my writing but that’s because i don’t see a lot of fics with it. if you want something different, specify in a request and i will write your request more to your liking <3 i want everyone to feel accepted and welcome here because it’s important !!!

on that note, you won’t catch me writing about “bare pussy” or “hairless legs” or whatever. i try to keep it all up to your imagination !!! (you will find hairy men tho !!! the lads i write for will always be hairy but that’s cause i’m a whore)

anyway i luv you and you are so so so beautiful and i hope you have an amazing day / night wherever you may be

this post is not an attack or anything of the sort. i’m just speaking my mind :)

lots of luv <3

#captainfern #fern talks about societal issues for some reason when she probably should be writing about john price or something

[dduane]

With regards to etiquette regarding authors and fan-works: how does this work with authors who participate in fandom subsequently writing authorized spin-offs or...whatever you'd call "I don't own this IP but I have permission to publish a thing"? Obviously "don't send someone fic directly so they can choose whether or not to engage" is a good rule to follow, but if you — as an example — read a bunch of Sherlock fic and then get hired to write a Sherlock novel, is that then legally problematic?

Hmm.

Let's first sharpen up the terminology a bit, so we can all be sure what we're talking about. The owners of a given IP may not necessarily be the ones tasked with the actual business of inviting others into the property to create new material in that universe. So for convenience's sake let's just lump the actual owners and the ones managing the IP on their behalf together as "the Licensors". The person/s allowed by the licensor to execute this new art, or to hire people to do it, is/are the licensee/s. (...It's actually a little more complicated than that, but let's leave it there for the moment.)

Now, about your first question: let me head first for a situation where I've been in the past, so I can tell you what I did.

Let's say someone who's read Star Trek fanfic—not exactly vast amounts, but some, a decade or so previously—goes pro and then gets asked by the licensor, "Hey, wanna write a Star Trek novel?" When that happened to me, I let my editor know that I'd read some Trek fic in my time, but would do my best to avoid any storyline that was anything like any fic material I could remember. And for a long time I had an informal agreement with Pocket Books—noncontractual, but one I adhered to rigidly—that I would avoid reading any Trek fanfic while I was writing Trek professionally, and would only read Trek material provided to me by the publisher themselves. (This habit has persisted for a long while, as—these days in particular—there's no telling when the phone might ring...)

Back in the day, this approach worked well enough to be going on with. For one thing, Trek fanfic was then way thinner on the ground than it is now, and (being printed pretty much exclusively in paper fanzines) was far easier to avoid. It also worked because I had no desire whatsoever to take the chance of borrowing anybody else's material to begin with. Then as now, I'd have felt that would've been seriously wrong—and anyway, I had more than enough ideas of my own. ...And it worked for a third set of reasons, peculiar to Trek.

Early on, the attitude of (first Paramount, then Gulf&Western, then... who came next? Viacom? Anyway—) the corporate owners was essentially, "We own this IP; nobody should be writing fic in it without our permission; if anybody gives us grief about one of our books being like something of theirs they wrote illegally, we'll come after them with the lawyers." This attitude was markedly not Roddenberry's (at least early on...). He absolutely knew about fic, saw it at conventions, and largely seemed not to mind. This weird dichotomy of stances contributed to an atmosphere in which ficcing fans were inclined to walk softly, try to keep from being noticed by the corporate levels, and (if they engaged with Gene on the subject) keep it very low-key.

Now around the same time I was doing my first couple/few Trek works, the profic/fanfic interface started to get spikier. This was at least partly due to the problems that followed Marion Zimmer Bradley's engagement with a fan writer in her Darkover universe. At least partly as a result of this, various pros' attitudes toward people ficcing in their universes noticeably hardened—the emphasis shifting from concerns about personal preference to sharper ones centering on the writer's potential legal exposure. (Though the two kinds of issue did sometimes get tangled together.)

So that bubbled along for a good while in the background, coming more seriously to the boil when the Internet became a thing, and fic started to percolate through it in newsgroups and mailing lists and (finally) onto easily accessible web pages; and most recently, into platforms like AO3.

And this is where the question of ease of access becomes a significant part of the equation, and the picture shifts equally significantly.

I can't help but smile at the phrasing "If you—as an example—read a bunch of Sherlock fic and then get hired to write a Sherlock novel..." Because though there may be some Tumblerini sitting at the bottom of the crater Daedalus or in the depths of Valles Marineris* who don't know about this, well, I'm a Sherlock fan... and this query is pertinent.

Let's say that Messiah comes, the King returns, and the BBC commissions Sherlock S5. And secondary to that, let's say that the production staff call my agent and say, "We hear you've got this hot licensed-property writer who's done work for all these different licensors. How about you ask her if she wants to write a Sherlock novel for us?"

And now we're up against it... because there's more than one kind of tie-in novel.

One is the kind where you novelize a script. Of agreeing to that I'd have no fear, because the boundaries of such work are tightly circumscribed. The writer's job in such a situation is to render the dialogue and visuals as gracefully as possible into prose, and otherwise to avoid unnecessary flights of fancy that might jar against the writers'/producers' creative vision. ...So if that was what they wanted, I'd pretend to think about it for a couple of days, and then have the agent call them back and say "Yeah, sure, let's do it." (And then the shrieks of delight would begin. Sometimes it's useful to live this far out in the country.)

But if they wanted an original novel? A new Sherlock story?...

I would have to say no. Because my AO3 bookmarks are hip-deep in Sherlock fics, and there is no way, NO way, I could say with my hand on my heart that I was sure I wasn't going to wind up, however accidentally, borrowing or restating something I'd seen of someone else's. If I accepted that job, and then (a year, two years, five years later) someone appeared with evidence in their hands and said, "You used a situation / language that's clearly mine", I would be utterly shattered.

And would it be "legally problematic"? You bet it would. Forgive me for not spelling out all the ways it could be Bad. But even if the situation was finally resolved in the friendliest way possible for everybody concerned, the fact of what had gone wrong would hang like a shadow over every other piece of licensed work I might ever want to do. (And there probably wouldn't be a lot of those.)

So realistically speaking, the ethics of the situation would make that a challenge I wouldn't dare take. I would walk away and try my best to keep to myself the annoyance that would follow. It'd be sad, but it'd be necessary: because the lines I expect to be drawn to protect me, I must also make sure will equally protect others. It's only right.

Anyway, thanks for the question(s). Hope I've sufficiently covered the ground; and HTH.

*I almost typed that as "Valles Marinaris". Yeah, the Solar System's biggest known crevasse now suddenly full of spaghetti sauce? I almost did that. Always proof your copy three times...

#fanfic #profic #and their changing interface

[h-harleybaby]

what would it be to sleep in one bead with kenny?

You mean bed? 💀

Definitely tho, love that trope

ONE BED TROPE w/ Kenny <33 (hcs)

• Uh-oh, looks like you have to share a bed with your favorite orange airpod! Whether it’s that y’alls hotel booked weirdly so you share a bed, or one of y’all stays at the others house and the only way for the parents not to find out is stay in that room, Kenny is kinda excited about it

• We know he’s a cuddler so if you’re good with it, he’s gonna be cuddling you all night

• Definitely makes some kind of innuendo about sharing a bed but that’s Kenny being Kenny

• Kenny has absolutely no problem sharing, but if you’re saying he should take the bed and you take the floor he’s not gonna have any of that

• That’s just how he thinks, plus he knows it’s not comfy so he would try making you take the bed. Ofc in cliche fanfic fashion y’all come to the agreement of sleeping in the same bed. It’s not even that bad why do people freak out about it???

• Kenny makes you as comfortable as he can. You wanna use him as a pillow? He’ll pat his chest and say he’s your pillow now. You wanna sleep on the other side with most of the pillows? You got it hun

• But he prefers cuddling, it makes things less awkward and he’s touch starved so ya know

• He’s such a caring guy <333

• If you let him, he’ll lay between your boobs and honestly, he thinks he’s in heaven. Probably makes a joke asking if he died and you’re an angel

• Doesn’t even matter if it’s mid day he can and will cuddle you until it’s night, and then he’s gonna cuddle some more

• Probably wakes up in the middle of the night to you curled up to him and he thinks it’s the cutest thing ever, if he can take a picture- h e w i l l (He’s gonna make it his Lock Screen)

#south park x reader #south park x y/n #kenny x reader #kenny mccormick x reader #h harleybaby needs help #Harley’s anons <33 #harley’s requests!

[theshelbyclan]

Baby Outlaw

Summary: Natasha has found out about another little girl who managed to escape the Red Room and she’s put Yelena onto it. But you escaped over a year ago and have no intention of being found (Part 1)

A/N: Here we go: my first not-Peaky fanfic on this blog. I started writing this one a while back and I’ve written a few more parts already, but I just wanna see first if anyone is interested in this one. Also, I wrote this one with an OC originally, but decided to post it as a reader insert, because people on here prefer those usually. Anyways, let me know what you think and whether you’d like to read more!

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

Words: 3228

*****

“Yelena.”

“Hi! Are you calling me from your superhero friends’ headquarters? Are they with you now? How is the god from space doing? Tell them I said ‘hi’!” She excitedly answered the phone, only to suddenly change her tone, “Wait, what is wrong with you? You sound so serious.”

Natasha was serious, “I need you to track someone down.”

“I am,” her younger sister still didn’t quite understand, “You gave me the file with all the girls, remember? I’ve been tracking them all down for the last months.”

“I know, I’ve heard.” Still there was the urgency in her sister’s voice and it didn’t go unnoticed by Yelena. “This one is special.”

“They all are.” To Yelena, this was a matter of principle; from faceless weapons they were now free women, all important and valued. Still she understood, “Special why?”

Natasha sighed on the other end of the line, “Do you remember everything Dreykov did after I managed to get out?” She tried to hide the guilt from her voice as much as she could, but didn’t quite manage it.

“Of course. The security got much stricter, punishments harder, and the chemical subjugation. No one escaped after that.”

“Well, someone did,” Natasha said sharply. “Another girl managed to get away, only a year ago. She escaped from the woods, when they were training her. During the blind dropping.”

Yelena remember that part of their training well. The young girls were dropped in the middle of the woods during the freezing winter and had to get back on their own. It had taken her days to do it. A lot of girls never came back. “But wait, that means she’s only small...” she wondered out loud.

“I think she’s twelve now, thirteen maybe?”

“How did she get away? The tracker...”

“She cut it out of her leg,” Natasha finished her sentence for her. “This must’ve been before they did the operation on her.”

“Umnaya devochka...” Yelena mused with some admiration in her voice.

“She won’t be in your files.”

“I can find her,” Yelena said confidently, “if you can tell me where she was last seen?”

“St. Petersburg,” Natasha was obviously rummaging through some files on the other end, “but that was almost a year ago.”

Yelena nodded and was quiet for a little while. Then she wondered, “Why is she special? To you. There were so many little girls. We all were little girls once.”

Her sister didn’t reply straight away and when she did, some emotion slipped into her voice, “She doesn’t have anyone. I checked. Dreykov killed her whole family. And she managed to get away, just her, but now she has nowhere to go and no one to go to. I think she deserves someone looking out for her for once.”

“I think so too. I will look out for her,” Yelena answered decidedly, “I will find her.”

Natasha felt a certain relief wash over her. She knew Yelena would understand. After all, if she didn’t, who would?

*****

Six weeks later, Yelena was staying in a small apartment somewhere in Camden Town in London. It had taken her quite a while to track down the little girl who somehow had slipped through Dreykov’s fingers. She’d survived the Red Room and found a way to use it to her advantage. Yelena decided that as soon as she’d found the girl, she would have to ask her a lot of questions on how she did it.

But the kid was slippery, as Natasha would say. In the last month, she’d moved cities twice and changed the name she went by four times. In St. Petersburg, they called her ‘Anya’ at one of the shelters where she sometimes went for food. In Berlin, the homeless kids mentioned a girl named ‘Lisa’ that fit her description. In Paris, she’d dyed her hair, clever girl, and went by ‘Cleo’ and then ‘Lilian’. Finally, Yelena tracked her to London, where she heard rumours of a ‘Maisie’ living rough, which was funny to Yelena, because that name did not suit her at all. She felt like she knew the girl already. 

But the trail kept going cold. Yelena was constantly chasing shadows and rumours, never catching actual sight of her. Until London. Up until a few days ago, the former assassin had spend days gathering information and had gotten a recent description. And then, when she wasn’t even really looking for her, she’d seen a kid on the streets. It was only a glance but Yelena knew it was her.

“Hehe, there you are, you little fish,” Yelena whispered to herself, as she observed a child that had gotten so good at not attracting any attention to herself, that Yelena noticed at once. Right now, she was walking around the farmers market in Islington and she’d already managed to nick two apples, some chocolate and some more chocolate, a can of coke and a loaf of bread. All the food disappeared into her seemingly endless pockets. Yelena smirked at the sight.

“Well, that explains one thing,” she told the little hooded figure from far away, “how you managed to survive the Red Room’s starvation techniques. Let’s see what you do next, rybochka.״

But as Yelena made her way to follow the girl who had just rounded a corner, she saw that she had vanished. “Shit,” she hissed and cursed herself internally for being spotted. Quickly, she started running until she caught a glimpse of the blue raincoat the girl was wearing. Fast a lighting, she darted through the crowds and Yelena had the hardest time keeping up with her. Through the streets she chased her, waiting for her to slip up somehow, but she never did. Nimbly, the girl suddenly sprinted into a narrow little street and Yelena almost ran by it. At the end, she jumped over a few cars and crossed the road, while Yelena had to wait for them to pass before she could follow. She was losing her, a twelve-year-old girl, and it bothered her immeasurably.

“Oh, come on!” the blonde called out, as the kid suddenly did a double take and disappeared into the crowds again. Full of frustration, Yelena shoved people aside left and right to her. And then, pure luck, she recognised the raincoat right in front of her. She grabbed it tightly and tried to tackle the girl to the ground, though carefully, very much aware that this was just a child. However, this child had received years of training in one of the most severe facilities on earth and as soon as she felt Yelena’s tightened grip on her shoulder, she spun around, ducked and flipped her assailant over her shoulder.

With an “oooff” filled with surprise and embarrassment, Yelena hit the pavement. “Seriously?” she muttered and in that moment, she locked eyes with the strange girl. It was like the world stopped for a few seconds. Yelena recognised both the fear and the resolution in the other’s eyes. She opened her mouth to say something to calm her down, but as she moved to get up, the girl kicked sand from the streets into her eyes. Spluttering, the assassin wiped her face and lost sight of the girl. When she pushed herself up, she was gone.

Cursing loudly in Russian, Yelena attracted quite a bit of attention on the crowded streets. She huffed with irritation and walked away. Then she took out her phone and called her sister.

“Did you find her yet?” Natasha answered by way of greeting.

“I lost her.”

“Again?” she sighed, “She’s only twelve, Yelena.”

Full of indignation, she protested, “Well, none of this would have happened if you would have given me the correct information sooner! She is too smart now.”

“Smarter than you?” Some sarcasm laced Natasha’s voice and Yelena could practically hear her smirking on the other end.

“I have sand in my eyes...”

“Poor baby,” She now not even tried to hide the humour in her voice. “Do you need me to come down there to help you?” 

“Yes,” Yelena replied at once, mainly because she just wanted to see her sister again, but reconsidered, “No. No, I know you are busy with superhero stuff.”

Natasha was silent for a little while, letting her younger sister sulk for a bit, “Stop chasing her. You’re probably only scaring her away. Remember what they taught us about being followed?”

“Find out who is following you and why.” The tactical theories had been an integral part of their training.

“Exactly.”

Yelena bit her lip and suddenly smiled, “I know where she’s going next.”

*****

As soon as you were certain you’d lost the assassin, you made your way back to Camden Town. For a couple of weeks now, you’d noticed someone on your trail and while you’d had your suspicions, your pursuer managed to remain in the shadows for the most part. Until the last few days: you’d decided to flip the tables on her and tried following her. This all went according to plan, up until today. Still, you figured you could use your little scuffle to your advantage, because now she’d be busy trying to find you. This gave you a chance to check out her apartment and learn more about her.

It hadn’t been hard for you to figure out where she’d been staying. In fact, it had been laughably easy, if you knew what to look for. And so, only half an hour later, you were standing in front of the right building.

Now for a way to get in. You debated climbing up the walls, but there were a few too many tourist out and about for your liking. As a stroke of luck, one of them walked up to the front door and was currently fiddling with the keys.

“Let me try,” you walked up to him with a winning smile. “My mum owns this apartment, there’s a bit of a trick to it...” Without suspicion, he handed you the keys and soon enough, you’d opened the door. “See?” you charmingly beamed up at him. He didn’t think anything of it as you followed him inside.

After waving after the tourist, you walked up the stairs to the third floor. You knew it had to be one of two apartments on the front side of the building. Singing some Russian song to yourself, you settled on trying one of them.

Forcing the lock was a piece of cake and it took you about four seconds to do so. After looking around for a few moments, you knew you’d picked the right apartment. Everything looked staged somehow: there was some furniture and even a few knick-knacks scattered around, but none of it really seemed to reflect a real personality. This was an assassin’s cover story, without a doubt.

“Bed first,” you whispered to yourself, as you lifted up the mattress to look for the most obvious hiding places. Nothing there. Then you checked a few random drawers and eventually made your way to the kitchen. There, on the table and in plain sight, you found a postcard yet to be sent. You flipped the image of Nelson on his column around and on the back was written: ‘The biggest poser of them all, just for you. Love, Yelena.”

“Yelena...” you tried out the name carefully. Suddenly, your stomach made a growling noise and you went in search of some food.

Just as you had your head stuck inside the refrigerator, you heard a sound behind you. Quickly, you slammed the door shut and ran for the bedroom window, but when you got to it, a blonde was blocking the way.

“Hi!” she cheerfully said, which only gave more rise to the panic you felt building up inside of you. So, she continued, “You know, if you are looking for more food, I can make us something.”

“Shit,” you hissed and ran into the other direction.

Behind you, you heard her call out, “You do not have to run, I am happy to cook us something. I am hungry too, you know!”

Not knowing what else to do, you fled into the little bathroom and locked the door. Breathing heavily, you tried your very best to keep your focus, just as you were taught. But panic settled into the pit of your stomach, because as soon as you laid eyes on her again, you were certain: she was a widow. And you’d rather die than be taken back to the Red Room.

“Little fish...” she called out from the other side of the door, “Please just stop. It is no use. That window will not open. I have tried.”

You tried the window and cursed again at finding she was right.

“Yes, much shit,” the voice confirmed.

You slapped the side of your head three times, telling yourself to snap out of it. The only way you are going to survive this, you told yourself, is by staying calm and thinking.

“I just want to talk. And eat.”

But her talking to you didn’t help. In fact, it only increased the urgency to flee you felt. Finally, you let yourself slide down against the door and sighed. If you were going to get out of here, you needed to find a way out of this bathroom first.

Yelena, on the other side, sat down with her back against the door as well. And even though she remembered being that age so well, and she understood all the fear and distrust you were probably feeling right now, she had a hard time finding the right words. So, instead she asked, “During the dropping, how did you manage to escape the dogs? I mean, you cutting the tracker from your leg was smart, I will give you that, but that also makes me wonder: why did they not notice sooner that it was no longer moving? And how did you manage to get out of the forest without dying of frostbite first? I just have a lot of questions, you know, and I really would like some answers, because now I feel stupid for not thinking about all of that when I had my dropping.”

“You wanna know so you can tell them where to upgrade their security?” The words had left your mouth before you could stop them.

“No, rybochka, of course not. Besides, there is no point now. The Red Room is gone.”

You sucked in a deep breath, hopeful for a second, but immediately telling yourself this must be a lie.

“You don’t believe me?” Yelena seemed to sense your emotions, “I have proof.”

Considering all your options quickly, you realised you didn’t have many. “If I come out, you swear not to touch me?”

You heard some movement outside of the bathroom and realised she was getting up. “I swear it. And if I did, you’d probably throw me across the room again.”

Furrowing your brows and wondering if this was another joke, you opened the door and moved out with your back against the wall. There you found Yelena, standing in the middle of the room with her hands up, and a slight smirk on her face.

“Dreykov send you?” you asked, still eyeing all the possible exits.

“Dreykov’s dead.”

You narrowed your eyes, “How do you know?”

“I blew him up. Boom. Just like that,” the blonde smirked again at the memory, “First, we set the Red Room on fire and when they tried to escape, I sabotaged the engine and blew up the ship as they tried to get away.”

“How?”

“I stuck my baton into the propeller and it exploded. Like fireworks,” Yelena nodded proudly.

You frowned again, “There’s no way you would have survived that.”

The assassin made her way to the kitchen, but continued in a conversational tone, “I almost died, but my sister jumped after me and attached her parachute to me. Natasha saved me.”

“Right,” you nodded slowly, still very unsure of what was fact and what was fiction in this story.

“Listen, rybochka, I understand you don’t trust me now. It is okay, but I just want to help you.”

You felt at the lining of your pocket to feel for the reassuring presence of a knife there. “Why do you keep calling me ‘fish’?”

“Because you are slippery and also cute.”

Some strange part of you did like this strange assassin that was probably send to kill you. She felt familiar somehow, like you’d known her for a long time.

“Now what?” you finally asked.

“Now you give me your knife,” she glared at you strictly, like you imagined maybe a mother or sister would, “the one you keep in your pants.”

Rolling your eyes, you produced the small weapon and reached out towards her. But as Yelena tried to take it from your hands, you swiftly kicked her to the side and dashed forwards.

“What was that for!” she shouted out, full of genuine hurt. With a growl, she dodged the next few blows you tried to land. Quickly, you became aware of the fact that she was a lot more skilled than you were but you had one advantage: she tried her very best not to hurt you. Guess there were some upsides to being only twelve.

Yelena jumped out of the way and avoided the chair you threw at her. “Enough!” she warned you, “Stop fighting me or I will have to fight back.” By way of an answer, you kicked the door in her face and sprinted across the little corridor.

This was your mistake, because in those few seconds, you lost sight of her. The moment you rounded the corner, you were tackled to the floor. Yelena quickly straddled your waist and pinned your hands as you tried to claw at her face.

“Calm down!” she instructed loudly, trying to make herself heard over your loud shrieks, “I do not want to hurt you!”

“Maybe I do want to hurt you!” you ground out. Again, you felt a part of you wanting to trust her, but you just couldn’t let yourself do it.

“So stubborn...” Yelena gritted her teeth, as she tried to keep your squirming form in place. “Fine,” she suddenly let go, “As a sign of trust on my part, I will not stop you. Go on, little fish, hit me.”

You balled up your fist and pulled it back, but for some reason, you couldn’t do it.

“Good.” She climbed off of you, “Now we can eat.”

You watched her walk away and wondered, “Are you the Yelena?”

“Yelena Belova, and yes, you have heard from me.”

You had: ‘the greatest child assassin’. It was like she could read your mind, “But I am not her anymore. I am free now.”

“How?”

“I will explain while we eat. Come, little fish,” with a small smile, she motioned for you to follow her.

“Stop calling me ‘fish’!” You got up and walked over to the kitchen.

Yelena was gathering different groceries and you wondered vaguely what on earth she planned on making with all of that. Meanwhile, she stated, “But I don’t know what else to call you. What is your name?”

“It’s Y/N,” you whispered, feeling more vulnerable than ever.

Yelena smiled warmly at you, “Y/N is a nice name, rybochka.”

*****

Masterlist

#marvel #yelena belova #yelena #natasha romanoff #black widow #black widow fanfiction #yelena x natasha #yelena x you #yelena x reader #black widow imagine #marvel imagine #marvel x reader #florence pugh #avengers #avengers x child!reader #the avengers #avengers x platonic reader #avengers x y/n #natasha romanoff x platonic!reader #natasha romanoff x reader #yelena belova x sister!reader

[qqueenofhades]

as a starting history major i wanna ask how do you read/evaluate academic history papers/books? i'm trying to avoid just blindly agreeing with whatever the author is writing because it seems correct. how can you tell what is good scholarship and what is more shaky?

This is a great question for you as a freshman history major to ask (many of my toiling colleagues and I can attest that we wish more of you would!) and shows that you're already taking initiative and investment in your studies and want to be the best prepared you can. So truly -- thank you! Us on the faculty/staff/administrative end of academia can feel as if we are pouring into an empty bucket at times, and it's always gratifying to hear otherwise. We really appreciate it.

As a college freshman and/or underclassman (or so I'm assuming) your first job is learning how to collect basic information from the things you read, collate and cite them accurately, and make them converse intelligently with each other in an entry-level piece of academic writing (such as an essay responding to an assigned prompt). So before you have to worry about understanding complex nuance and granular-level fact-checking, the first step is just getting comfortable with academic forms, styles, and conventions. There's an occasional anti-intellectual strand of thinking that pops up on Tumblr, basically insisting that everyone everywhere should be able to understand everything in fifth-grade words and if not then it's Elitist Gatekeeping, but this is a symptom of TikTok brainrot where people's brains have been literally rewired to only process spoon-fed chunks of incredibly simplistic (and uh, often wrong) information, and literally can't parse anything longer, even if it's written in accessible language. Yes, many academics are not necessarily great writers, but you also have to let go of the mindset that you can speed-read once and understand everything. You will need to slow down, take your time, and make a note of concepts that are confusing or that you want to double-check, words you need to look up, and things that make you say "hmm I should look into that more," whether because you're interested or they seem questionable. I always read academic texts or papers (I prefer hard copy, because I am Fucking Old) with a pen in hand, because if I don't, I often feel like I didn't read it at all.

Basically, this is an interactive process between you and the text, and requires you to develop a different kind of reading mentality than just buzzing through a novel or fanfic for pleasure. You have to expect that it will take time and that if you regularly skive off the readings, you won't be prepared for class, your professors will be annoyed, and you won't be able to write good essays, because you haven't engaged with the material. In your case, it sounds like that will be less of a problem, because you are eager to know how to do it right, but I can tell you from my experience that nothing frustrates us more than students who just won't do the reading (and you know, use ChatGPT to write their essays) because then what are you even DOING here? What do you want to get out of this? Why are you wasting your precious tuition money like this? Yes, you probably have to fill a requirement, but STILL. It's disrespectful to your teacher, who has invested a lot of effort in being here to help you with this and doesn't want you to just quit because it looks hard, and your peers, and to you. So anyway, /Captain Holt voice/ apparently that's a trigger for me. Basically, if you learn nothing else from this ask: please do the reading. Even if it's only to admit you need more help or want to talk about this concept in class or otherwise take advantage of all the structures that are in fact there to help you understand it! Thankee.

Likewise, because you're an underclassman, you have an advantage in that your teacher will select the class readings for you ahead of time. That means you will be receiving things that a professional has already checked, decided are useful and trustworthy, and you don't have to do independent research and vetting yourself (that will come if you decide for some godforsaken reason to pursue graduate and/or doctoral study). So you don't need to spend tons of extra time and effort deciding if the sources given to you in class are reliable on a basic and functional level; your professor has already done the work for you to make sure that they are. Your job is now to read those sources, keep a record of what they say (hence the aforementioned pen or other way to make quick notes) and figure out how to put them together in an essay. For example, if Author A cites Factor A as, say, the main cause of the fall of the Western Roman Empire, and Author B insists that Factor B was in fact more critical, what is your best approach to reconciling that information? You would search in the rest of those texts to see what else they say in support of their position, and you would probably end up with a qualified statement to the effect of, "While Author A argues A, Author B thinks B, representing the lack of consensus and the difficulty in attributing one single cause to an event as complicated as the fall of Rome." (And then because you're smart, you would go on to mention Byzantium and the Eastern Roman Empire and show that you are aware of the further context.) All of which is true! Historians do that all the time! You don't need to select THE RIGHT ANSWER and vigorously discredit all other theories, ever, and we tend to look suspiciously on people who do (cough cough Philippa Langley).

In other words, we are certainly not expecting you as a freshman, and even as a more advanced student, to be able to pick out ONE ANSWER from the material. We just want to see evidence that you have in fact read it, are able to evaluate and place theories side by side and possibly make a judgment as to which one you find more compelling, and also to properly cite where you got that information. We've seen a lot recently about plagiarism and that being the pretext on which Harvard president Claudine Gay was forced to resign (which is a whole other can of worms, but never mind). A lot of professors think that saying "Don't Do Plagiarism" is enough, but then don't explain what it is and the different forms it can take. It's not just a matter of copying verbatim chunks of someone else's work (or you know, ALL OF IT, like certain recently discredited YouTube scumbags) and acting like it's your own. If you are relying substantially on someone else's work, whether in their wording, arguments, conclusions, structure, or anything else, even if you've changed some of the words (yep, still plagiarism!), that needs to be cited appropriately according to the relevant style guide. Direct quotes from anyone need to go in quotation marks or indented blocks and have the author cited immediately afterward. History usually uses Chicago, MLA, or MHRA, and you can find cheat sheets for how to do that online. It's a pretty simple and straightforward style, and your professor will be extra impressed.

If you're expected to do an independent project or a senior research thesis, as some undergraduate history students do, then it will come when you have already had three years of experience in reading, evaluating, and writing historical scholarship, you will probably have a faculty member assigned to you for one-on-one mentoring and personalized feedback sessions, and they will be able to provide suggestions and support for useful sources. So even then, you still don't have to do it entirely on your own. They'll probably also be MORE than happy to debate with you which ones are good and which ones are suspect, because it's all a part of developing your ability to flex that muscle for yourself. (And as noted, faculty members Will Have Strong Opinions.) That likewise doesn't mean you just have to copy whatever they say (at least if you have a good teacher who wants you to think for yourself and not just be a mini-clone of their pet theories), but it means that by the time you reach that stage, you will have been prepared enough to feel confident in taking more steps on your own. I think not enough people realize that studying history (or anything, really) isn't just throwing you out there and being like "tough luck sucker, do it all yourself."

That's why academia is so collaborative, why plenty of historians with doctorates and tenure will still have to say "I don't know, let me get back to you" when someone asks them a question at a conference, and you don't have to fear that if you don't have The One Right Answer, you will be immediately exposed as a fraud and thrown out. History as a discipline is also moving away from the 19th-century German approach that attempted to systematize it as a singular social science with One Right Answer, and to focus more on multiple perspectives and incomplete answers. That's why the goal is not necessarily to know everything (which alas, is impossible), but to make better sense of what we can know and search for ways in which the existing record is flawed and needs to be revised, expanded, or reworked with new perspectives (which have existed all this time, but haven't been privileged by the white male western academy for the obvious reasons). And that work is fun and important! I don't want you to be scared of getting to that point, because someone will be there to support you the whole way and by the time you do, it will make sense to you in a way it probably doesn't right now, just because it's a new skill and like any new skill, it takes a long time to learn and to be able to apply confidently, consistently, and at a high level. And plenty of us who do it as a career still often have to say "I don't know, let me ask Dr. So-and-so who specializes in this," so yeah. It's a process of becoming comfortable with both learning how to answer what we can, and to ask others for help with that, and it never really ends. Which is the fun part. There's so much more to do.

Good luck!

#anonymous #ask #history #school stuff #academia: not even once

[olderthannetfic]

I don’t know if it's appropriate on this blog but I'm just going for it. How do people make friends in fandom? How do you all manage it? I've been bouncing from fandom to fandom for more than 15 years and have been mostly lurking for the better part of those years. It has been very hard to find friends just in general because of my shyness and all this antiship/proship discourse is making it even harder to even consider putting myself out there. Everyone just seems insufferable. Even the ship and let ship crowd.

A thing I've noticed is that while the proship spaces have better attitudes towards fiction/fandom/fanfic in general there exists this weird hate boner about people with canon ships (in my personal experience, just last week I stumbled on a tweet from a self identified proship account telling people that they shouldn't read fanfic of their blorbos because they are canonically together which made me go huh) and there exists this strange superiority complex, a "you're not enlightened like me" attitude (it's very strange and especially prominent among people who identify as proship and ship the big m/m ship in fandoms of material catered towards male audiences, ik this because I was guilty of this superiority too at one point). Honestly, this "enlightenment", the hypocrisy of preaching ship and let ship but only the way I deem correct (last week I saw a big a proship account shade shippers of a specific rival ship right under their thread about how we shouldn't generalize and I think I lost brain cells) and condescending attitude of "I am not boring like you" and "You're doing fandom wrong" is one of the reasons that has turned me off those spaces more and more. I've noticed it once and can't unsee it because it all gives off this mean girl (gender neutral) energy and puts me off interacting.

On the other hand a lot of the ship and let ship spaces that prefer the canon ships tend to be very anti adjacent even if they actually practice ship and let ship (screaming and crying about sexualization of minors, throwing out phrases like porn addict around). I've seen some very strange sentiments about Europeans there (like thanks for informing me that all of us are monstrous bloodthirsty cannibals I guess) and Japan (which is ironic because it's mostly anime fandoms doing it). It doesn't make me wanna associate with them either.

--

*dying*

Nonnie, do you know how staggeringly often I get this question?

A big part of the answer is to not be a lurker. There are reasonable people out there, but they're much less visible than loud assholes, so the best way to find them is for them to find you.

Many of my closest fandom friends are people I met offline, either because they live near me or because we went to cons together. Others are people who turned up in replies on tumblr regularly. You need repeated contact that's memorable enough to recall the person as a distinct individual. I sometimes find that hard online. It really depends on frequency and them having something to say plus a good writing voice.

I know lots of people are shy or prefer to be lurkers. I get why. But you'll rarely meet anyone that way.

[aziraphales-library]

Hello! Thank you all for your generous work in the community! after s2 I need some really fluffy fanfic because I ache,

I need something very very fluffy, totally non-explicit, asexual, I love some fat aziraphale related fluff, maybe a length of 4k-50k? It can be more or less. I have read everything from ineffablefool. human au are preferable, but if it isn’t it’s also fine.

Anyway, thank you very much for your time, I appreciate all you do <3 :)

Hi! We have tags for all this: #fluff, #asexual, #chubby aziraphale, #human au. Here are some fics that may or may not have already been recommended...

with the help of a cat, or two by whicorzoo (G)

In which the cat in the window of the flat right across from Crowley's is unfairly perfect, so on a particularly whimsical night, he decides to put up a sign in his window to tell his neighbor as much. By morning, he's forgotten about it, until he sees it in his window and regrets the decision entirely. He expects to have his cool, intimidating facade never taken seriously again. He does not expect a response.

The Art of Human Nature by IneffableDoll (T)

Crowley is a painter who has only ever had an eye for nature. That is, until a client named Aziraphale commissions her for a painting to boost her self-confidence, and Crowley discovers that her client is as beautiful as the Earth itself. Then she goes and catches feelings, because she’s a disaster.

Therein Lies The Beauty by BlackUnicorn (NR)

After receiving an unexpected invitation to his brother’s wedding, an unfortunate realisation about his old suit, and the inconvenient news that his trusted tailor had closed down, Azra Fell finds himself in Devil’s Wear and his world turned upside down. OR Two trans tragedies accidentally steal each other's hearts and then simply never give them back.

Around the World in 80 Cakes by cookie_full_of_arsenic (T)

This is a queerplatonic love story between Aziraphale and Crowley. Or possibly between Aziraphale and cake. There will be recipes because I'm extra.

Across the Line by hope_in_the_dark (T)

Ezra is a student in his final year at University College London, and he’s in love with a man he’s never spoken to. For months, Ezra has been tipping (and pining after) a musician named Crowley every time he sees him. He thinks that Crowley hasn’t noticed him, but Crowley has. A love story that begins with, of all things, the saving and handing over of a book.

Do I wanna know? by KissMyAsthma (M)

Aziraphale and Anathema are both closeted queer people, and they decide to do what any sensible closeted queer people do - they form a fake relationship, to shut the mouths of their families and shoo away unwanted suitors. Their comfortable arrangement is put into question when a school reunion makes Aziraphale reconnect - or connect, really - with his school crush, Anthony Crowley. But past is past, and now that they’re both adults, Aziraphale is just glad to make a friend. If the friend finds himself interested in Aziraphale… Well, there’s nothing for him to do since Aziraphale is taken, right?

- Mod D

#good omens #ineffable husbands #ineffable wives #fluff #human au #asexual #asexual relationship #chubby aziraphale #mod d

[pray4byron]

Okay, so, I don’t really know how this works, but I saw you were doing HH character mashups and I was like “huh, that sounds interesting, let’s give it a shot.” Fair warning, no god damn clue how to do this so sorry if it’s terrible. Platonic and romantic if you would be so kind (if not uh… sucks to be me I guess).

Okay, so, I’m about 5’2, cisgender female, pronouns are she/her. I grew up in a small town, and I have a very close group of friends that I don’t typically venture outside of. I’ve definitely got some form of anxiety kicking around in my brain, phone-calls, ordering at restaurants, and socializing in general are HORRID, and I’d much rather stay at home reading, writing, drawing, and of course consuming Hazbin Hotel content like my last will to live!

I’ve been described by others as a very intelligent individual, with a high work ethic, sarcastic humor, and a witty attitude. While I don’t like most people, most people tend to like (or at least tolerate) me. 90% of the time I’m wrapped up in some sort of hyperfixation. They take over my life and you WILL be hearing about them (I try to control myself, I swear). Uhh… not 100% sure what else to put here? I’m a sucker for emotional angst and hurt/comfort, and you BET that if I’m writing a fanfic, that’s what I’m writing.

Hope this is enough? If I did this whole thing completely wrong, feel free to delete this and cast me into the void to be forgotten as the cringe person in your askbox who didn’t have a clue what she was doing 😅. Anyway, uh… get to this when you have time. Idk how to end this. Hydrate? Yeah that works, cool. Ok bye,

okay so i didn’t get a gender preference for you (romantically), so i only did platonic cuz i didn’t wanna give you someone who doesn’t fit into what you’re attracted to, also cuz i have no clue who i’d give you for a romantic matchup anyway so i hope it’s okay haha, anywho i paired you with…

Alastor !! (Platonic)

Alastor has an appreciation for your intellect, let’s be real, he has a tendency to get irritated with people who aren’t as a efficient as him, so that fact that you are, makes him a lot less irritated XD

Also, he has an appreciation for your sarcasm and overall witty remarks as well, he doesn’t always understand them, per say, especially if their more modern, but he takes a moment to appreciate them nonetheless

#reqs closed #hazbin hotel #x reader #mio’s writing ! ☆ #fanfiction #x y/n #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x y/n #hazbin hotel x you #x you #mio’s matchups ! ☆ #alastor the radio demon #hazbin alastor #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor x reader #alastor

[musashi]

I’d LOVE to talk about it!!!! There is NOTHING like holding a physical copy of a fanfic you love in your hands, whether it is yours or someone else’s. Though I do recommend you get a physical copy of your own work first and foremost, it really cements the fact that you wrote a whole ass novel, or a collection of short stories. The first few fics I ordered were ones I wrote myself and I still go out into my living room to pull them off the bookshelf and just hold them, sometimes.

There are a lot of websites that exist where you can print books without publishing them. The website I use to print fic is Lulu. There are other websites but this one is my fave. Some people have probably written beautiful guides on book binding but I would rather just have a service do it for me.  i thought it might be fun to make a whole ass tutorial on my process, if anyone is interested? Because I really think this should be something more people do, I am telling you it'll change your LIFE. Wanna re-read that old fave in your bookmarks? Cut down on screentime! go GRAB IT OFF YOUR SHELF and settle in all cozy :3

SO: HERE IS A WHOLE ASS TUTORIAL ON HOW TO ORDER PRINT BOOKS OF YOUR FAVE FICS.

I use google docs. There are probably ways to do this in other word processing software but google docs is my friend. So this is how I do it. Google is also your best friend when figuring out how to make these adjustments in other word processors fghdg.

So you kinda want to set up the skeleton of your physical fic first. You wanna make a blank document, go to file > page setup and change the paper size to A5. This’ll put it in peak book format! Hurray. You’ll notice things are a bit cramped here but don’t worry, the margins are supposed to be like that. I like single spacing with the typical indent (.50) so thats what I do. I know some people prefer double spacing, so if that’s your jam do it! Just keep in mind it’ll make your book a lot thicker, it really depends on how you want to condense things. Font size is also a factor here. Personally, I LOVE to condense–12 point times new roman font and single spacing is my jam, heres what that looks like:

But again, depending on how long of a story/collection you want to make, you can space things out too. 

Make a nice title page! Mine are pretty simple, just the title and the username. Sometimes I’ll put the fandom name like ‘a [fandom] fanfiction’ but for the most part thats just for PDFs i share of my own fic. When it comes to my own fic I also like to put little dedications at the beginning for flair. Again, that’s just for me.

this is from my sicktember anthology, which is just all my sicktember fics in a neat little book. here's Down's:

this is my favourite part of printing my own books. i like to get sappy with it.

Add page numbers! This is something you can do automatically in most word processors. You can put em anywhere, I always put mine as footers ‘cause I really just like my fic to feel like a real book. This is under 'insert' in gdocs.

If you’re doing an anthology collection or a lot of fics in one book, a table of contents is good to have! If you apply a heading effect to each story/chapter in google docs, you can automatically insert a table of contents. I usually have to play around with mine a little (and edit it after, pin in that for later) but it’s a good thing to have. But in order to make a table of contents you have to actually have the fic in the doc, so let me teach you how to do that.

Congrats @pictureswithboxes, you are hereby my guinea pig. Because your fic is a good length and it’s the first one that isn’t my own that I’ve turned into a physical copy. Everyone please watch as I turn Turnabout Substitution into a book.

There are many ways and many formats you can download an AO3 fic in. Personally I prefer the HTML format–don’t ask me why, it’s just the best one I’ve seen for keeping things easy to edit and intact. If you work better in PDF or EPUB feel free to download those, but it’s my tutorial so you get HTML.

I drop the HTML file into docs. When you open it, you get this nonsense:

'cause that's a whole ass webpage, obviously. so open it AGAIN, this time using this button up top:

And that gives us… well, a lot more nonsense–it drops all the tags in, authors notes, whatever. You’re welcome to keep author’s notes if you like, personally I do without them (i love to read them digitally! I just keep them out of my physical copies) and everything is in 11 pt times font. The first thing I do is highlight the body of the fic and ONLY the body of the fic. I do this chapter by chapter.

Once I have chapter 1 highlighted, i change the font to my preferred size and typeface–in this case, 12 point times new roman. And then, with the body of the chapter still highlighted, i fix the margins/indent–left to 0, first line to .50, and right to 6.50. Then, with all of that highlighted, I paste it into my ‘book’ doc and all the indents/font choices carry over. Easy peasy.

I go ahead and make a chapter header. I think when doing a proper manuscript a chapter is supposed to start at the mid-point of the page, but i usually have the title at the top and the body text starting halfway down.

(my doc is in grey to avoid eye strain. if you do this, make sure it's white when you save it xD)

After a chapter–or any time you want to move onto the next section–use a page break! These are under the ‘insert’ tab. They will automatically jump you to the next page, and they will be necessary, for many reasons, but also because!!!

A new chapter should always start on the right page. In order to keep this correct, I take note of if my right pages are evens or odds in page number. Your first page will always be on the right. If you add a table of contents, it should also start on the right–so add a couple page breaks between the two to make a fully blank filler page. In my experience, because page 1 is always right, this usually means your right page will always be an odd number, but for some reason I'm having some weird mandela effect where i swear it wound up evens one time. huh. never hurts to double check! and triple check.

I ignore this all while I’m pasting the chapters in, but then at the end I go through all of them using google docs’ outline feature. Which is honestly NECESSARY for something like this, if you aren't already using it:

(anything marked as a heading will show up here! or you can highlight something, right click, and add it to outline manually. It's great!)

If my right page is odd-numbered, i check each of them one by one to make sure they all start on odd pages. I add an additional page break in the chapter before if they’re not, to make a filler page. it might feel weird to have all these blank pages in your doc but trust me you will appreciate them when you are actually holding the book.

As I am doing this, I also scroll up to the end of the previous chapters to look for orphans/widows. These are single lines that wind up on their own on the page and look kind of awkward and personally irritate me. Most word processors also have a feature to get rid of these, in google docs you just have to highlight the whole paragraph the line is in (or the paragraph before it, if it’s dialogue or a single line on its own) and apply a heading to it. You can highlight it and click ‘update heading to match’ to do this without changing the font. Good as new! It’ll show up on your outline on the side, but you can delete it by hitting the x beside the lines.

Another thing I do with the body text is i scroll through the whole doc and look for line breaks. AO3 has built-in ones you can insert, and you’re welcome to keep those if they are in a fic you like. Personally i prefer the look of a space to separate, though, so I actually edit them out and replace them with 3 line breaks. Literally just hit the enter key 3 times.

TS here is a case fic, told in the style of the ace attorney vn, which means each chapter has a few locations and timestamps displayed. I do 3 blank line breaks before these, and two after. Because it’s what looks nicest to me. You can play around with aesthetics and see what you like.

Once everything looks good, I scroll back up to update the table of contents if I have it. Google docs has a feature where you can ‘refresh’ it, but… I do not recommend this, because if you formatted your table (which you most likely did, it looks kinda terrible on its own) this will reset the formatting, and that will more than likely space out things or add unnecessary things (like those widows and orphans you marked before) which will add to your page count which means your TOC will be wrong ANYWAYS. So what’s the alternative?

Open your doc in two tabs. Same doc, two tabs. In one tab, stay on your TOC. In the other, click through your outline and input the new page numbers yourself. A little painstaking, but less prone to error. Easy peesy! Here's a bit of my finished TOC for my sicktember book:

Like all things, you can play with fonts and margins.

Your book is READY TO GO. Save it as a PDF, you can do this by hitting the print button in docs and most other word processors. Then instead of choosing a printer hit ‘save as PDF.’ Scuttle on over to Lulu and make an account. Yes it is worth it. Fic!

Lulu is awesome because it has lots of customization options. If you wanna get fancy with it, you could insert images into your PDF and get a colour book! But I just order print books, basic black and white. Once you name and upload your PDF, you can choose EVERYTHING. What kind of paper you want. If you want hardcover or paperback. The world is your oyster. Lulu will then give you a template for your cover, fitted to the dimensions of your fic book based on page number and what options you choose. They technically have a guide that lays this all out for you, but I find it incredibly confusing, so here is the streamlined wendy version:

There are a lot of options for how to make this cover. You can use an image editor, like photoshop, or you can draw fanart, or you can simply go into MSpaint and add some shitty little text to a solid colour if you don’t feel like anything fancy. A lot of people also use canva, which has tons of templates and assets you can throw together. I use canva so much i actually paid for a pro subscription lmao fsdghfgh but I also use photoshop a good deal. I made DTE’s covers in photoshop:

And Down’s cover in canva:

When I’m doing canva covers, I always just save the PDF, pop the template into photoshop, and then paste the images over it and rearrange them to my liking. I think Lulu also has an in-site canva editor but I don’t like learning new software. Photoshop is easy gfhfhg.

WHEN YOU ARE SAVING YOUR COVER. LISTEN TO ME. LISTEN THIS IS IMPORTANT ESP IF YOU NEVER TOOK GRAPHIC DESIGN OR HAVEN’T PROFESSIONALLY PRINTED ANYTHING. When you are saving your cover. SWITCH YOUR COLOUR PROFILE TO CMYK!!! Do not save it as RGB! RGB is good for digital graphics, but if you EVER print something you need to switch it to CMYK. I FORGOT TO DO THIS SOMEHOW when I printed my first two fic books, so their covers look a little washed out. When you do this in your photo editing software, they will look washed out there too–this is normal. They will print SO much better. Just trust me. 

Make sure you save your cover as a PDF and pop it onto Lulu! It’ll show you a preview of your book and cover which you can go by page by page to look for mistakes or anything you may want to change. In this preview the cover will ALWAYS look like a shitty, jpeggy mess. IT DOES NOT LOOK LIKE THAT IRL. I was so concerned fghfg but they print fine the preview just sucks.

wow so cool. this is for Down's hardcover which has a lot of margin. the closest summation of what your book will be like is to turn everything here off but the folds:

so cool. thats my book.

And you’re good to go! Enjoy your fic!!! PHYSICAL FIC IN YOUR HANDS!!! I got to experience the most magical thing recently: my friend bought a copy of Down, and then SHIPPED IT TO MY HOUSE, and i got to SIGN IT. I got to SIGN a copy of a BOOK I WROTE. They loved it that much. And I had the PDFs. PDFs I need to update, because I didn’t know half the shit I just wrote here when I made them. BUT I GOT TO SIGN MY FIC!!! SOMEONE LIKED IT ENOUGH TO BUY IT, AND THEN SEND IT TO ME, TO SIGN!!!

All the money here goes to printing costs, if that wasn’t obv. Paperbacks on Lulu can be under ten bucks depending on how thick they are, and hardcovers are usually under 25. It’s insane to me how cheap it is to print fanfic, and once you try, you WILL be addicted.

I tried to make this tutorial easy to follow, i hope it was! If anyone has any questions about the process, I am always happy to answer. Or, um, if you just want me to do all this formatting FOR you… I might be open to doing it for free. Mutuals get first dibs but I genuinely LOVE formatting docs for printing. I can’t help you with covers (i flounder even making them for stories I love) but I’ll always format a fic or several fics for you. Just HMU ghfghgf

#fic printing #fic printing tutorial #wendy rambles

[lollytea]

One of Hunter's bi awakenings was when he realized he wouldn't stop reading fanfic of Captain O'Bailey x reader (and male! reader if you wanna make it gayer) and he went "wait a minute..."

and I like to think that Willow's bi/pan/omni awakenings was probably being clingy with Luz. "Yeah, I just LOVE having a female friend my age that isn't Amity. She's so cute and cool and funny and pretty and I'd kiss her given the chance-"

I see Hunter as liking girls SO much. Like even as the Golden Guard, a few years before he met Willow, he used to fantasize about himself carrying out heroics and he always just included some pretty girl watching and being very impressed. He never really thought about other genders until a little while later.

Although I also like the idea that he had a baby crush on Steve at some point. That's so funny to me. Steve peaks his interest in other genders, so now he's a little more open to the idea.

There is some big strong violent brooding dude in Rulers Reach and Hunter is into him!!!

Afsvjdbk when Hunter reads Cosmic Frontier, his thoughts on O'Bailey is just like. He's me. I'm him. I think he'd be a very strict canon compliant bitch. O'Bailey has a botanist wife and Hunter is very protective of that relationship and can't deal with his wife being erased in fics. HOWEVER.....fics set before O'Bailey met his wife? Where he travels the galaxy and has a romantic tryst with some alien dude on another planet??? Hi, yes, Hunter is listening. Especially if the alien boyfriend is like. All fanged and furry or scaly or BIG or weird looking. Hunter is into monsters, I know he is.

Tbh I never saw Willow as having a specific awakening but rather it was just something she was always just naturally aware of. I often wonder how the lack of homophobia on the Boiling Isles effects how people come to understand their own sexuality, and I figure it just results in them being a lot more indifferent to it from an early age. Like even before Willow really developed any romantic feelings for anybody, she could easily picture herself marrying a person of any gender. She didn't really have a preference. She still doesn't.

She snuck into the YA romance section of the library with Amity when they were kids and she was enchanted with several characters of various genders. She liked the Prince Charming types. She skimmed through the chapters to get to the part where they take their shirt off. She liked the silly plucky girl heroines with swords.

If you think about it, her fascination with both Luz and Hunter was very similar. Like "WOW what a freak (affectionate) I need to study them." She was down to kiss Luz if she asked but she never really got to the point of seriously falling for her. However studying Hunter under a microscope sent her tumbling down a rabbit hole and now she's completely smitten with him.

[the-s1lly-corner]

I want to request like. A cuddling session with Slenderman, who is having a bad day and we comfort him

(つ≧▽≦)つ

I'm addicted to the idea of him pretending to be okay with people calling him monster, but deep down he has this longing for it to stop, since he wanted to get along with the proxies and others he deemed second family.

So he like, rant about his day while reader comfort him.

Maybe get him a little fluster aswell （〜^∇^ )〜

(Take your time and have a good day/night)

All Entwined in One Web

obligatory im stuck in the 2015 era of the creepypasta fandom and ive been mulling over this sort of approach in my head for the past month because i revisited an old slenderman x oc fanfic that had a death grip on me and shaped the way i will interact with + and consume creepypasta stuff for the sake of saving grace and not revealing HOW cringe i was im not going to drop the fanfic name (unless yall dm me because!! i still wanna support the author even if it seems theyre inactive now!) i blame this author for making me a demon sympathizer/j/lh written kinda different than my basic bullet list of hcs! got silly with this one, sorry if its jarring compared to my usual stuff </3 this post is mostly just my hc on like. slender (and by extension all demon characters) being neutral and a simple part of nature that stems from zalgo (yay im finally dropping zalgo lore for my au since he functions differently in my au/hc!!) so take this with a HUGE grain of salt since i feel this deters from the main take people use (that ive seen, at least) this one ended up being more.. sad than i first intended and imma be honest i kinda got into my feelings when i was writing this anywaus i hope this isnt too cringe since i dont talk much about my HUGEhcs/au stuff/rewritten stuff so!! plus i dont usually write BIG detailed stuff like this sobsob tldr; slenderman isnt good or evil hes just a neutral piece of nature in the world and hes trying to cope with it. the demon gods really fucked up by making him sentient and able to process human like emotions

death is a force of nature and people curse it for simply being a part of life; people curse wild animals for being, and people will curse the weather

in this universe, or timeline, demons exist in a similar manner. slenderman exists simply because hes a part of that huge web of nature. of course, that includes every single ugly instinct that humans hate so so much. and he can understand why, even if its his nature.

the one responsible for that web, is zalgo. the beginning and end of everything. neither alive nor dead, all demons stem from zalgo in one way or another.

a solitary creature that prefers to stay alone in the comfort of its home, it doesnt tend to reach out to harm others unless theres harm. only really attacking people that threaten to expose it or get too close...

except, you... you were the one exception. regardless of how you managed to worm yourself into his heart, and become his lifelong companion, hes grateful for your presence when things begin to build up.

he knows that in the eyes of others, he ugly and vile, but he knows that ultimately thats what protects him. he insists that its better this way, sticking to the forest away from the prying eyes.

SURE, he could follow in his brothers footsteps and make a false human body and try to blend in with the people. but is that really efficient? is that really something he wants? hes a powerful being but that would eventually take its toll on him..

ultimately he resigns himself into your arms; once oozing powerful and command, now crumpled and curled.

he never had a childhood, when zalgo created him, he simply.

was

no adolescence, no developing, no growing. he was always what he was meant to be, but he likes to think that when youre holding him, that this is what it feels like to be so small and vulnerable.

humans had it so easy, hed think. theyre born and they die and the process repeats itself for everyone. they dont have to be feared or hated, or kill to survive.

yes, to him, being mortal was far more preferable to being condemned to being a lonely hermit who corrupts and breaks everything it touches.

even with your comfort, theres only so much that you can do; youll eventually pass on as well and hell be stuck in his cycle once more

but for now, as you hum softly and whisper nothings to him as you let him crumble; hell let himself weep just this once.

because as much as he envies your life, and what humans have, he cant deny that he cant bring himself to truly hate them, because like him, theyre simply a piece of natures web.

#creepypasta au #creepypasta slenderman #creepypasta headcanon #slenderman x reader #slenderman headcanons #slenderman imagine #drabbles #angst #really im just being silly #creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #creepypasta x you

[teenandbeyond]

Levi Ackerman x M. Reader [Pt.3]

After reading a Levi fanfic, I got inspo to make a prequel to my Hero two-shot...now three-shot (technically). This is what lead up to parts 1 and two.

Want more from me? Masterlist 2

Here are Part One and Part Two.

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

⚔Love, Sweat, and Tears⚔ (AOT or SNK)

Warning(s): Fluff, cursing (I think? I don't remember), long, low-key angsty toward the end

Levi just wants some tea, turns out he gets something a little sweet, too.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

"Where are we going?"

"They say this place has the best tea around here, you like tea, right?"

Levi glared at the outside of the building they stopped at.

RoyalTea.

He was still deciding on what he thought of the name.

The outside had a creamy purple color with white and gold painted accents in well-placed areas.

"Wanna go in?" Gabi, one of his caretakers asked.

"They better have good tea."

"It's been open for a year exactly today. But apparently it's very popular," she wheeled him inside.

The second they were inside, they were hit with the scents of different teas. Though every individual smell complemented each other.

But the interior was what really caught their attention.

"Whoa...I don't think I've ever seen a shop this clean looking..."

Levi liked this place already, this place was anti-dirt.

Customers were scattered across the shop, talking to each other over white tables, sitting in window seats, and girls were crowded at the counter table.

They didn't look like tea drinkers, so why were they looking so eager?

"It looks like this place is taken over by brats."

"Hello, sorry for the wait. I got the blend you wanted in your preferred amount."

Levi couldn't see who the voice belonged to over the throng of ladies as he got closer to the counter to hopefully be able to order.

"Yes, [Name], this is perfect! Thank you."

You laugh, "It's no problem. You, ladies, might want to start buying in bulk, though. Your usual order of two pouches can last about a week just between 4 people per bag. But you come here every other day ordering more."

"Yeah, we just love tea so much! And we just want to support our favorite shop owner," one leaned in.

"We should go, customer service is shitty here," Levi muttered.

"Sorry, Levi."

"Thank you, I appreciate that. But ladies, would you mind moving since you've paid already? There are customers behind you."

"Oh."

They turned to the two dryly, glaring at them before leaving the store altogether.

"Sorry about that, some of my customers can get that way! You look like you two must be new. Would you like to hear the options of tea I have? I also have pastries if you're interested."

Levi dragged his gaze back to you and he swore he stopped breathing.

Who was this beautiful man? [Name] he heard? He was suddenly much more interested.

"Sir?"

"What?"

"Do you need some time to think about it?"

"No. What do you have?"

You began to rattle off all the types of tea you possessed, even some that Levi's never heard of, which you explained when noticing any confusion.

Usually, he didn't like when people talked so much...but he found he didn't mind when you did it.

Privileges of finding you pretty, he guessed.

He stealthily observed you, from your jaw to your white dress shirt to the beginning of your waist until the counter blocked the rest of the view.

After he ordered, since Gabi didn't want anything, you smiled.

"Want any sugar or honey with it?"

Levi cringed, "What kind of moron adds shit to their tea?"

You only chuckle at his language, "It actually isn't too bad if it's done right."

"Nothing belongs in tea," he glared.

You rang them up, "Three dollars–and Mr. Levi, I'm sure I could change your mind. I'm very convincing. I'm pretty good at what I do," you gestured to his cup, "Just see for yourself."

After he was settled, he took a sip and almost groaned at its taste.

He was coming back here.

And he did.

Again. And again.

Until it was a regular thing.

"Welcome back, Levi."

That smile was lethal, did you not know that?

"Hey."

At this point, it'd been months and Levi became a [Name] addict.

"Same thing?"

"Yeah."

After serving him, you prepped some tea leaves to grind.

He watched as you work, enveloping the quiet atmosphere.

"I'm so happy I have this place."

"Hm?"

"I uh...When I was a kid, things came easy. So they didn't feel rewarding...until I bought this place and grew a business from the ground up...It taught me how to work, it taught me discipline, it taught me that an easier life doesn't mean it's better," you laugh to yourself, "Sorry, I know you don't want to hear this."

"That why you opened this place? To work hard after having an easy life?" he subtly signaled he did.

You snickered, "I know that seems backward, but yeah. I know it's selfish since there are people out there who'd kill to have the easy life I had...but...I wasn't being fed, or stimulated, I had nothing to wake up for. Then I met a military police officer—a good one—and he--he worked so hard, he had a passion for what he did. I wanted that. I wanted to know what it was like to have a reason to live, to serve others. So I left an easy life behind for a life of work...but it was worth it. It's so freeing to live this way. I was never free when it was easy."

After that day, Levi realized he crushed on you, hard. He couldn't talk to you straight after that.

You leaned on an elbow behind the counter one afternoon, "Hey, Levi. You look really handsome today--not that you don't always look handsome, of course. But today seems a little different."

His cheeks flushed pink, "I-I didn't do much brat, just...changed my hair a little..."

And one evening, you got bold.

"Hey Levi, can I get your opinion as an avid tea drinker? I'd feel like you'd be a better judge than me who leans more toward alcohol."

"Wh-what do you mean?"

"I've been testing a new tea brew, but I need another opinion before I decide to add it to the menu or not. Can you try it for me?"

"Sure."

"It's still in my apartment upstairs, I'll take you."

"[Name], I'm in a wheelchair, I can't go up the stairs on my own."

"I know, here."

"Pu-put me down!" he flushed red.

"But you can't walk..."

"You could've just helped me up. The other leg is still fine."

"It's faster."

It became regular for you two to hang out in your apartment above the shop after closing, and one night, you kissed. Neither of you knew how it happened, but it couldn't be taken back.

And once you finally get Levi comfortable with the thought, you decide to try being a couple.

And Levi needed time to get used to the foreign type of relationship.

He had to get used to someone smiling at the sight of him.

He had to get used to someone's lips brushing against his skin.

He had to get used to someone treating him like a prince.

Someone celebrating his birthday that he didn't think was important.

He had to get used to someone remembering the little things.

Someone with an open ear to listen to the feelings he hides within his depths.

Someone saying, "I love you, Levi."

And him saying it back.

And after three years of dating, he had to get used to living with someone he was in a relationship with.

Had to get used to full, warm meals from morning to night.

Someone restoring him back to health when he's sick.

Someone soothing him from the nightmares, someone showing him how to sleep better. And waking to another warm body in a bed he shares (which he had to force, for a while you'd let him have the bed to himself in respect).

He had to get used to finding more reasons to smile, he had to get used to making someone laugh and smile with ease.

He had to get used to someone cleaning for him, someone who's very stubborn with what they allow him to clean, "I know you like to clean baby, but let me do it, let me take care of you."

He had to get used to someone cutting his hair for him.

Someone who didn't judge him for his background, no matter what.

"Levi, you're practicing your writing?" you leaned over his shoulder.

"Habit."

"There's nothing wrong with where you're from. Because without that place, you wouldn't have become the Levi I love now. So don't feel like you have to hide it or be ashamed," you kissed the curve of his neck.

He had to get used to someone being attentive to him and his habits and behaviors. Someone knowing him better than he knows himself.

He had to get used to being protected and fought for, although he still likes to feel like he can protect, too.

"Levi! Never do that again, do you know how worried I was?" you growled, running a hand through your hair, "I swear you want to make me go more insane for you than I already have...Do you not understand that I would shed blood for you if I had to? Please don't take me lightly."

He had to get used to someone reading to him, someone tucking him in.

Someone making him try new things, like sugar in his tea. He couldn't believe it.

Someone...calling him beautiful...

Someone bathing him and joining him sometimes just for the pure connection of intimacy.

Someone that didn't need to have sex with him to connect with him.

Someone that will ask him how he's feeling, and happily fill the silence when he doesn't want to divulge.

Someone who buys him whatever books he wants. Spoils him and works hard to earn back the money spent.

Someone showing their love in physically any way they could, showing what it was like to have a gentle touch.

Someone who won't let him go to bed angry.

"Please, don't leave me, [Name]!"

"What?"

"I-I'm sorry, I do need you! And—And not just because you take care of me," Levi looked up in desperation, tears welling up in his eyes, he regretted every nasty word he'd just said to you.

You look like a broken-hearted puppy, "It really hurt, Levi."

"I know...I know, I...I'm not good with this 'feelings' stuff. I don't know how to tell you things, I don't know how to show you I care about you. But I'm tired of people leaving me! And you're the only person who hasn't, I don't want to be the reason why you finally do. So please," he approaches you with shaking hands, his face burrowing into your torso as he grips the back of your shirt. "Don't leave me...Please. I love you, I love you. I'm sorry."

(But he didn't tell you the real reason he blew up at you that night...because of his own hidden thoughts...)

He had to get used to someone who cried from his tears, someone holding him tight, keeping silent about the tears he knew they felt.

He had to get used to having a reason to keep going.

He...had to get used to you...

The one he loved more than anyone.

The one he wanted for the rest of his life...

...and the last person he'd want to see at the end of it.

#anime #fluff #aot x reader #levi aot #aot anime #snk x reader #snk anime #snk levi #snk fluff #levi x reader #levi x male reader #attack on titan #aot fandom #shingeki no kyoujin #levi x you #levi ackerman #aot angst #aot fluff #snk angst #levi fluff #levi angst #captain levi

[idkwhatimdoingherehonestlyy]

Girl… you say you uncomfortable writing smut but repost stuff involving smut and follow smut writers…..

Like girl your hypocritical

And the fact that your too scared to write smut like your dumb af. If you wanna make it in the fanfic writer world you need smut or you’ll get no hype on your boring ass stories LMFAOOO💀

At the end of the day writing these non smut stories isn’t gonna get you anywhere hun <3 😭 much love ig🫣

oh.. look im sorry i dont mean to come off hypocritical at all…. that wasn’t my intention. i don’t write smut because it makes me “uncomfortable” and when i say that it just makes me feel weird because it’s hard for me to write! i mean im not good at all. aand im sorry my stories are boring. i tryyy really hard on my stories. i prefer reading other smut because it’s well written and i love supporting other writers…❤️. writing fanfics are fun for me and kind of a coping mechanism and im not worried about being suuuuper hyped as a fanfic writer i just want people to enjoy my stories as much as i enjoy theirs! im really sorry for being a hypocrite i didn’t know that was how i was coming off trust me! also with the smut thing im sorry i know it must be weird and ill try to fix my writing abilities but im just not good at writing smut. I feel bad i didn’t meet your needs or pleases as a writer and ill try to do better you can count on me for that!

#austin butler elvis #elvis #elvis 2022 #austin butler #austin!elvis #austin!elvis angst #austin!elvis fic #austin!elvis x fem!reader #austin!elvis x black!reader #austin!elvis fanfiction #elvis imagine #elvis x reader #elvis x y/n

[vivilingriphyn]

Love the art!

Though I must know, why is Skybound your favorite season?

Reasons why Skybound is my favorite season.

It has stood up to the test of times, especially in my mind in the most unhealthy way possible.

It's the only season where it has STUCK to me since I was 6 and to this day it was only season that keep popping back up and the season where it pulled something in my child brain and the start of my spiral on thinking more fudged up Scenarios in my heads, alternate possibilities and more way to make the season even more messed up than it actually was and as a kid back then that watched cartoon 24/7 and watching that season of Ninjago felt fresh and something I couldn't properly understand back then and that uncertainty of what the fudge was happening made me eat up that season out of pure curiosity and need to understand what was happening, quickly spiraled into an obsession.

That even my child self became quickly aware of and never spoke of Ninjago ever again since and stopped watching but it NEVER made me stop thinking about Ninjago ever since then if I see a lego my brain would immediately think of Skybound and begin to delude myself that, that lego piece was Jay and my brain would spiral once again into my internal world of fanfics, and even when I finally first joined fandoms like undertale, mdzs etc. if I have enough time to myself, my brain would quickly turn to Skybound every chance it gets.

My obsession turned to annoyance but also began to turn to fondness once more and into acceptance, that I just accepted I will never escape Skybound, that the first ever fandom I ever joined wasn’t undertale but Lego Ninjago before I even understood what fandoms were. And Skybound will forever be stuck with me for the rest of my life just like how Jay's trauma from Skybound will forever be stuck with him for the rest of his life.

Nadakhan might've not succeeded in breaking Jay entirely, but definitely succeeded in making me give in and accept that I will never escape from Skybound in the 10 years that I been obsessed with it to an unhealthy degree but it will still forever hold a precious place in my heart, because I wouldn't be the self aware fudged up person that prefers fanfics over canon that I am today.

Thanks a lot Nadakhan :)

Also this is just the major reason why it's my favorite season. Because I have such a goldfish memory but Skybound has clung to my brain for so long that it can just become my favorite JUST because of pure resilience alone. Also because I've been fighting to forget about Ninjago but Skybound and my Brain said no so it's the season that takes the number 1 spot for me when it comes to Ninjago.

And I honestly wanna say more but also can't say more as to why It's my favorite. I feel like I need to rewatch the season after 10 years just to refresh my memory. And ask that question to myself. Just why?

And finally answer questions that my child self couldn't ask others out of fear of being too out of place and being teased and bullied for something I held strong feelings and passion towards back then and now I'm coming back to this now and of course my immediate thing that I do the moment I walk a back into this fandom is to go I went to Ao3, went to filter, and immediately typed in “Jay Walker” and “Nadakhan”

And God I never felt more happy reading fanfics of these two for the first time. In 10 years of my obsessions finally coming to fruition and I will EAT UP every skybound fanfic, headcanons etc. out there.

Also Skybound was the season that securely made Jay my favorite character. And yes I've also been obsessed with him for over 10 years ever since I first watched Lego Ninjago, like a fudging yandere that has no other reason to love their senpai just to be able FEEL something.

Wodnwkdnas I'm probably just spouting out pure nonsense, and an empty meaning and reasons as to why I love Skybound but, eh people love things for various of reasons so I might as well tell as to why since you asked, also gave me an opportunity to rant so… Thanks! ^^

Also here's a WIP for a Skybound Drawing I'll be doing, that'll maybe be posted in the future along with some of my personal Headcanon that's related to skybound, cause when you've been obsessing with a season for over 10 years without rewatching it and basing everything from you goldfish memory, make you think a lot, especially a lot of headcanons ╮⁠(⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)⁠╭

[shyficwriter]

Temporary Home: Chapter 25

Guardians of the Galaxy fanfic | Reader x Guardians (With Yondu and Kraglin!)

Summary: Just as things are starting to look up- spiders. So many spiders. Will everything be okay, or will Reader crumble under the pressure?

Previous Chapter here | Next Chapter Here Or click here to: Start From Beginning

Author’s Note: By gods, I've been writing this chapter since MAY of 2022!! Also, for my records this chapter ends on day 72 of the Guardians living with reader. Enjoy!

Word Count: 7,668

Your little chat with Yondu had actually made you feel better, to your surprise.

Sure, you still had bouts of post-vulnerability-embarrassment, but you found that a weight had been lifted somewhat when you went to bed that night, and you couldn't deny that you actually did feel better in the morning, enough so that you actually got right back into using the remote to prank Peter, though you of course now refrained from using it when Yondu was also watching the television for fear of prompting him to tell Peter what he knew out of spite.

The next couple days your mood improved even further.

You decided to join another sparing round with the others, though you did avoid matching with Peter out of paranoia that he'd pull another stunt like the last time. You were teased for this, mostly because when it happened you had turned to see he was your next match only to audibly state, "Nope!" and motioned him on to pair with Mantis instead. This made the others laugh, but you simply rolled your eyes with half a light-hearted smirk and brushed it off.

The day after that you decided to finally show Yondu some "Terran Archery" as you had said you would some time ago. He actually caught on really well, though he didn't deny that he preferred his own arrow. Then, seemingly just to show off, he whistled to command his arrow circle you three times before taking off to shoot clear through your target and then come back to rest in his holster.

Pretending not to be impressed, you start to head back toward the shed to put your bow and quiver away. "You know, you still never really said how Fury allowed you to keep that arrow."

Yondu just grinned and shrugged as he followed your lead to return. "Like I said. That's for me to know."

"Come on now!" You scoff. "Surely after making me spill my life story the other night you can at least tell me that."

Yondu pretended to think, smirking all the while. "Hmm… Nah. Pretty sure we never came to any such agreement."

"Seriously?!"

"Yup."

You sigh, letting it go for now. "Well, can you at least tell me how it works?"

"Whatcha wanna know that for? Ain't like ya'd be able to use it." He grinned teasingly at you.

Whether he meant he wouldn't dream of letting you try it, or that it literally only worked for him, you weren't sure- though you had a suspicion it was the latter. "Just curious," you respond, "I mean, I showed you how humans do archery, figured maybe you'd at least tell me a little something about your space arrow?"

Yondu appeared slightly annoyed, rolling his eyes and stopping to turn to you. He realized he was going to have to give you the same talk he gave Quill shortly after he brought him aboard the Eclector as a boy. "Let's get one thing straight. I know you Terrans ain't know a lot, so it ain't fully yer fault, but here's a lesson. You and me?" He gestured back and forth between you. "We're both 'human-' Got it?"

Confusion prompted you to look back at him. Both human? That couldn't be right. You were from Earth. He was from a different planet- an alien. Did people on his planet call themselves 'humans' too?

He continued. "You Terrans might think you're the only ones in the universe, but that don't make everyone else less than human."

Oh.

The guilt must have shown on your face because he sighed and tried to curb his annoyance. Slightly. "You? Me? Both human." He points at you again. "You and Quill, ya'll are Terran." He points to himself. "I'm Centaurian. Different races, both still 'human.' Got it?"

You nod. "Yes. Sorry-"

He waved you off, seeming satisfied enough and wishing to change the subject. The two of you begin walking again as he spoke. "Anyway, the fin picks up my whistle and sends it to the arrow. Arrow gets the whistle and goes where -and through who- I want it to."

"Uh, that's it? It's that simple? Do a lot of people use that in space?" you ask, deciding to move forward in the conversation with him.

Yondu laughed out his nose. "It's the best explanation yer gonna get, and no, it's actually not simple at all, and no- I'm sure I'm the only one with something like this."

Your eyebrows raised. "Oh. Why's that?"

"That's enough questions about the arrow for now," he replied flatly. His expression was just as flat, and you couldn't get a read on the reason for his reluctance to talk much about his arrow. He didn't seem upset or uncomfortable. Was he was just a "keep to himself" type of person, or was he just good at keeping up a mask?

You relented, slightly disappointed, but deciding to push forward with another question as you neared the shed. "Alright then. Um, what is your planet like?"

Out of nowhere Yondu's hand connects with your side to give it a couple quick squeezes, which results in you jumping with a startled giggly shriek. He hadn't even looked at you before doing it, which only made it all the more unexpected.

It was over in an instant but you still glared at him indignantly, feeling your face heat up. "What was that for!?"

Yondu shrugged with a grin. "To change the subject. Worked, didn't it?" With that he continued off towards the house, leaving you alone at the shed.

You huffed slightly and just went to put your quiver and bow back away.

* * *

Later that day you fancied yourself a glass of juice after switching the laundry you had just washed over to the dryer. The plan was to enjoy it in the sitting room while you re-read one of your favorite mystery books. After pouring yourself a glass and placing the bottle back in the fridge you grabbed said glass from the counter and turned to walk back towards the sitting room. It was then that you saw a shot of brown dart across the kitchen floor.

Recognizing it immediately as a house spider you jumped nearly out of your skin and dropped your glass, spilling your juice all over the tile floor, but fortunately not breaking the cup.

Unfortunately, Yondu and Kraglin had walked in around this same time and saw the whole thing, if Yondu's chuckling was any evidence to the fact.

Cheeks heating up, you quickly grabbed a towel to clean up your mess. You expected to be teased about the spider, but instead you heard, "Damn, I know Krags is funny-lookin', but we didn't expect to startle ya that much!"

You glance up, not intending to argue but grateful they didn't seem to notice the real cause of your startle. Kraglin jokingly put on a disgruntled face towards Yondu for the insult before turning to look in the pantry.

Then you saw Yondu throw you a wink before doing the same.

So he did see… and he was covering for you? Why? Never mind. You weren't going to argue or ask. But you did think you should consider making a special trip into town tomorrow to get some repellents or maybe some traps.

Once your mess was cleaned up you left the kitchen- no longer in the mood for juice, or to read. However, you thought maybe you were in the mood to watch something on TV, and upon seeing that nobody was occupying the television you decided to scroll through Netflix, finally settling on a familiar movie you had seen several times before.

Miraculously you got through the whole movie without anyone even coming into the sitting room, and you actually started to wonder where the others might be before you glanced at the clock and noticed how late it had gotten. They must all be in bed, and you should probably follow suit.

Doing your best to be quiet as to not wake anyone you went about getting ready for bed in the bathroom. It wasn't until you were about to shut off the light and retreat to your bed after brushing your teeth did you spot another spider. It was perhaps half the size of the one you had seen in the kitchen, but that didn't make you feel much better considering it was still about 3cm wide. You had almost touched it when you went for the switch and jerked your hand back at the last moment, catching an exclamation in your throat.

The spider quickly scurried away before you could act and somehow you lost sight of it. Unwilling to stay up to find it you quickly shut out the light and left the bathroom. That was a problem for anyone else. Tomorrow.

For now you were definitely sure you were going to the shops in the morning for both repellent and traps.

Fucking spider season.

* * *

Despite going to bed late you managed to wake early, and you would have tried to sleep-in if you hadn't reasoned with yourself that the sooner you left the sooner you would be back with stuff to get rid of the spiders and hopefully keep them away. Also you had to pee.

It seemed no one else was awake, which you became grateful for as it meant it was unlikely that anyone heard the very loud gasp you let out the moment you turned from closing the bathroom door towards the toilet and found the spider from last night sitting on the opened toilet lid, taunting you.

You considered for a moment nope-ing right out of there to go use the toilet downstairs, but you could hear the sounds of someone opening their door and started to feel self-conscious of someone possibly seeing you flee one toilet for the other due to a spider. It also wouldn't solve your problem as you'd need to come right back to this bathroom anyway because everything you needed to wash up and get ready with for the morning was in here.

Damn it.

Ok. What were your other options?

Maybe flick it off with a towel? But then you'd have to worry about where it would run to after. The thought of it crawling up your leg while you did your business made you shiver and you immediately threw that idea out.

Well, what if you closed the lid? Maybe it'd fall off into the bowl and you could flush it away? But that would require putting your hand way closer to the spider than you were willing. You weren't about to risk it crawling on you. Also you had a feeling you'd need to slam the lid for that to work and you weren't thrilled about drawing attention to yourself.

You needed to find a way to kill it somehow, a feat easier said than done considering you couldn't stand the thought of getting too close to it and the fact that you really just wanted to be able to use the toilet, get ready, and get on with your day.

You looked around for something you could maybe squish it with, because as much as you wanted to avoid it you sure as hell weren't going to go ask one of the others to come kill it for you. You'd use the bathtub as a toilet before you did that. Luckily for you, you weren't nearly that desperate.

Speaking of the bathtub though, you spotted a bottle of shampoo. Considering it a good enough weapon, you snatched it up and aimed the blunt cap towards your enemy. Moving slowly, sure the spider would run if you made any sudden movements, you inch closer… closer… until smack! You finally darted your weapon forward and crushed the spider between the toilet lid and the lid of the shampoo bottle, grateful the spider also hadn't decided to make any sudden movements before getting squished. It would be very likely that you would have dropped the bottle in the toilet if it had.

You pulled the bottle away and found the spider-guts had decided to stick to the cap, leaving little more than a slight smudge on the toilet lid.

Grabbing a sheet of toilet paper you sat the bottle with it's arachnid corpse on the sink, intent to remove any evidence of your enemy's unwanted prior existence from the toilet lid before finally relieving yourself- deciding to wait until after you had done so to give the spider it's "sea burial." It might be dead, but still- no. Ew. It could wait it's turn.

After finishing your business, flushing your friend, and cleaning off the shampoo cap, you were finally able finish getting ready for the day, and thought maybe you'd reward yourself for your bravery with a muffin for breakfast.

* * *

You had just finished up eating and were about to get ready to leave when Mantis came over to you from the pantry asking if you could help her get the jar of peanut butter open.

Little did you know this would be the start of a chain of events that would significantly delay your morning plans.

For what felt like several minutes you did your best to open the jar but didn't succeed, so you handed the jar off to Drax who had just happened to walk into the kitchen, yawning and rubbing his eyes. Rocket filed in behind him, ignoring everyone as he made his way to the washing machine and threw something inside.

Drax got the jar opened in nothing flat, but he apparently had news for you; Groot had decided to take some juice upstairs and had spilled it in their room.

You sigh, but grab the mop as you internally begrudged Drax for not just cleaning it up himself instead of coming to tell you about it. Though, it was probably just as well- he wasn't exactly the most thorough of cleaners and you didn't want his poor mopping to leave a sticky juice residue behind.

As you filled a bucket you wondered how the tiny tree child would have managed to get a glass of juice all the way up the stairs without spilling any only to then spill it in their bedroom.

It would turn out, as you saw when you reached the stairs, he hadn't. There were little puddles of juice over nearly every step on the staircase. Enough so that you wondered how there was even any left for him to spill in his room when you finally reached the door and located the glass overturned in a puddle of juice near Rocket's bed- which was missing it's blanket. There was, however, no sign of Groot. You'd worry about that later.

For now, you had just never been more glad that you didn't have carpeting in your home- and idly wondered as you cleaned if Groot had actually managed to drink any of his juice before spilling it everywhere.

When you finally finished mopping you grabbed the first person you could find- in this case Kraglin, before tracking down Groot and having Kraglin translate that the wooden child was no longer allowed to carry liquids upstairs.

You weren't totally sure the message got across, but there wasn't a whole lot more you could do so you just had to hope the kid actually understood when he nodded in response and ran off. You awkwardly thanked Kraglin and went to return your mop to the kitchen.

It was there you encountered Rocket again, who opened the dryer and then gave you grief about having left your clothes inside.

You roll your eyes at him but say nothing as you snatch your clothes out of the dryer and move to take them upstairs. Might as well fold them now so you don't need to worry about them later when you get back from town.

Once your clothes were folded and you were putting the last of them away you think you might finally be in the clear to be heading to town when Mantis startles you by running up to you crying and holding her hand.

You almost scold her for scaring you like that when you see that she only had a paper cut, but you held your tongue and instead helped calm her down and find a plaster in the medicine cabinet.

Once you had her settled you headed to leave before anyone else could manage to stop you again, once more being startled by a spider in the hall and cursing the creature.

Soon after, Gamora came across you as you were pulling on your jacket, keys in hand. It was then you realized you hadn't bothered to tell anyone you were leaving and you thought you might do so then, but Gamora actually beat you to it.

"Are you going into town?"

"Uh, yeah actually. Did you need anything?" you asked, pulling up your jacket zipper. Silently you hoped it wasn't something else that would delay your departure even further.

"Take Peter with you."

Taken aback, you let out a surprised half-laugh and looked at her. "What?"

"I need you to take Peter with you."

You blink at her. "…Is everything ok?"

She glanced down the hall before lowering her voice. "Yes- it's just-" She frowned. "Ok, he's driving me a little crazy today."

"It's not even noon?" You raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"I know," she said pointedly.

You frowned. You hadn't intended to bring a passenger with you. "Won't he ask questions? I've never exactly brought him along willingly before."

"Somehow I doubt that will be a problem. I'm fully certain he's just being annoying because he's stuck here and bored."

You open your mouth to reply just in time for Peter to step out of the bathroom. To your surprise Gamora calls out to him and tells him that he's going to be accompanying you into town.

"Cool!" Peter says, going for his jacket as you blink at Gamora, who doesn't look at all apologetic.

Defeated, you sigh and just motion Peter toward the door, throwing one last glare over your shoulder at Gamora who finally mouths "sorry" just as you close the door behind you.

The ride into town was much less annoying than you expected. Instead of deliberately trying to annoy you, Peter seemed content with just listening to the radio the whole way into town, which wasn't at all unwelcome seeing as your thoughts were on what sprays or traps you might get this time around for the spiders, and considering how you weren't exactly looking forward to discussing the situation.

Eventually you reach the shop, where you manage to park, go inside, and grab a hand basket all before Peter tried making small talk.

"So, you're quiet today."

You glanced at him in puzzlement. "I could more say the same of you. Normally you never shut up. Maybe I was enjoying the quiet."

"Rude." Peter said, giving you a quick poke to the ribs.

You jumped and glared at him with narrowed eyes, to which he only grinned and mock held his hands up in defense as you walked past him and made your way toward the aisle where you knew the pest control items would be, trying to think of anything else you might need to pick up while you were in town, which wasn't a lot since you had just recently been in.

Unable to think of anything on your own, you glanced at Peter and asked him if he knew of anything he or the others might need. You knew the answer was likely also nothing, as Fury had just come a couple days prior with a restock, but it didn't hurt to ask.

"No, I can't think of anything. Wouldn't argue against some Oreos though."

This made you huff a laugh out your nose and as that aisle was coming up first you opted to detour and grab them on the way to your actual reason for coming to the shop.

As you were leaving that aisle Peter speaks up again. "So, I noticed you seem to be a little… less grumpy lately." In a joking tone he continued, "That mean you're finally starting to like us?"

"Don't read too much into it," was your reply. "Maybe you all have just gotten less annoying after a couple months. Or I'm suffering a weird form of reverse Stockholm Syndrome."

Sure, you could have said you had a sit down with Yondu where you spilled your guts. Could have mentioned how somehow you actually felt better afterward. Could have also mentioned how you had no idea why- since all that mandatory therapy SHIELD ordered you to take couldn't even do it. But you weren't going to. Just because that one talked helped didn't mean you were ready for a repeat of that vulnerability anytime soon. Besides, the more you thought about it the more you figured it was probably a fluke or something.

"Rude," Peter joked again, rolling his eyes and poking you in the ribs once more like before and jolting you out of your thoughts.

This time your reaction was to accidentally elbow him in the side, and you glared at him with wide eyes as he laughed and rubbed the sore spot. "That's what you get, now cut that out!"

There was a slight playfulness behind the scolding that didn't go unnoticed, but Peter once again held up his hands in mock-surrender. "Ok!" He could tell you were deflecting, but he wasn't going to push it.

By now you had reached the pest control aisle, only to find it wiped out of any kind of repellents or traps that might be useful against spiders. Perhaps if you had just gotten here earlier- but no. Everyone else in this area knew as well as you did that it was spider season, so you should have anticipated this. Better yet, you should have remembered to grab some stuff before the season came- though one couldn't blame you for being distracted the last couple months. Not like you had taken in a group of dysfunctional aliens or anything…

"Damn," you mutter under your breath.

"What?"

You shake your head. "Nothing." Ok. Think. Would there be anywhere else in town that might have anything still in stock?

"Aww naw!" came a voice from behind the two of you. Upon turning to look you saw there were a couple young men maybe in their early twenties. Clearly they had come looking for spider repellents too, and like you, were disappointed to find the supplies out of stock. Before they walked off the young man who had exclaimed could be heard saying to his friend, "This was the last place in town. Thought for sure they'd still have some in stock. Tough luck for us innit?"

Well, there went that idea.

Peter looked to you and caught you frowning. "Is there something I should know?" he asked.

"It's nothing, like I said," you reply, thinking to grab some juice on your way to checkout, realizing that much of what you did have at home had found it's way onto the floor. "It's just spider season… and I thought I'd grab some supplies before I had to listen to you scream like a little kid every time you saw one." Of course you were going to leave out the part that the real reason was that you really hated spiders. "Forgot about it until too late is all," you continued. "Been a little distracted lately." You throw him a pointed look as you said the last bit, knowing that he would know what you meant by it.

Peter frowned, offended. "First off- I would not scream like a little kid." He went to poke you again for the insult as the two of you approached a self checkout, but you smacked his hand away before it could make contact. "But that does explain so much," he added watching as you quickly scanned your small shopping haul and paid.

"What do you mean?"

"Why I've seen so many spiders lately." He replied, following you out of the store. "Saw three just this morning. Big suckers too- but I suppose that makes them easier targets to squish." He chuckled. What he wasn't about to say, however, was that he had actually called Gamora to come kill each one he saw.

"Oh," you reply, walking to the car. You did not like the sound of that. There had still been a part of you hoping that you wouldn't see much more than you already had. "Yeah- they come about this time of year- when it gets colder. I'm sure they'll have some more repellent in soon," you say, hoping he didn't notice the nervousness in you as the two of you reached the car. Once inside, however, you promptly dropped your keys before you could put them in the ignition. Nice. Real smooth. You continued talking as you reached down to grab them, "-or I can look into some home remedies. It's no big deal- they're harmless." That last bit was mostly a front to make you seem indifferent.

Harmless or not, you still hated them. It made you feel weak to admit it- not that you cared what they thought or anything- but showing vulnerability wasn't something you were used to. After all, you were still recovering from your talk with Yondu, and that was days ago.

Finally grasping your fallen keys you sit back up and insert the key into the ignition, but don't turn it just yet. You look to Peter now, trying to think of any other topic to switch to. Literally anything would be better than thinking about going back home to a house full of big-ass spiders.

Or so you thought.

You open your mouth to speak, intending to just pull a topic out of thin air, and then you hear it.

Blood turns icy in your veins as the awful wail creeps into your ears, and your chest tightens so that you can barely breathe. As your mouth closes, your eyes widen. However they do not focus on anything in particular- your vision beginning to cloud with images in your mind's eye. Broken glass. Twisted metal. Sickening yellow.

Peter sees the sudden change in you and speaks up in concern. "Agent?"

You don't even hear him, ears flooded with the terrible sound that's only getting louder. Turning away from him you begin to shake, now facing forward in your seat. No. No no no no. Please- Those words swim through your thoughts as horrific memories swim through your mind. Memories of pain… darkness… loss.

"Agent?" Peter says again, more concerned now. One moment you had been fine, and then you just froze- face falling into an expression of silent horror.

By now your breath is coming in an almost silent sob and you've brought one hand up to cover your mouth.

"Hey, hey- woah," Peter says gently, utterly confused about your sudden change in behavior but wanting to provide some sort of comfort. He reaches out to you and barely grazes your arm before you jerk away from him. Actually, he could tell it was less you pulling away, and more you had startled from the contact.

Terrible screeching. So much blood. Flashing lights. Please- No no no-

You seem to draw into yourself, and before long it starts to dawn on Peter what's happening. He had been too concerned with you to notice it before, but not only was it louder now, he caught a glimpse of it speeding on the road in the distance through the car window.

An ambulance, blaring it's siren. The sound he had played over and over that one night before realizing he really shouldn't have. Before he realized that sound had a dark effect on you he'd likely never understand. The sound that caused you to go out into the woods that night, the action that resulted in you getting shot.

Shit.

He looked at you, and could see you were barely with him anymore. Your gaze was distant and your waterline was flooded with yet unshed tears.

White sheets. Red stains. Darkness. Screeching. Pain. So much pain. Broken glass. Where are they- Blood. So much…

Peter felt he should do something, but he had no idea what to do. He knew of a couple guys on Yondu's crew that had PTSD, but he was never close to them. He had never witnessed anyone having a flashback before- if that's what this was. He had no idea how to help you. He couldn't mute the outside like he could the television.

Unless…

He knew it was a long shot, but it was worth a try. He reached over to the radio and hit the buttons, and turned the knobs, trying to get any other sound to drown out the siren that only seemed to be getting closer.

Unfortunately, nothing happened.

Fuck.

He looked and saw the key you had left in the ignition, and reached over to turn it, realizing that nothing in this damn vehicle must work without it. Stupid Terran caveman tech.

The lights on the dash came on. So did the radio.

Jackpot.

He quickly turned the volume knob and the music blared out, drowning out the siren. Having come on so suddenly and loudly, it also actually seemed to startle you out of whatever dark place you had gone. Not instantly, of course, but the resulting jolt managed to nudge your breathing towards a better rhythm.

You take a couple shuddery breaths as you start to come back around.

You are safe. You're in your car- but everything's fine. At least, as fine as it can be all things considered-

A blink made the tears finally escape your waterline and you quickly wiped them away, turning your face towards your window and away from Peter. You realized what happened and you wished he hadn't seen. You felt weak. In a voice that you tried to keep strong, you say, "I'm sorry."

Peter frowned. "Hey- don't do that. It's ok. You're ok." He glanced between you and the center console, and in what was probably a hasty decision, he reached across and pulled you into a very awkward hug.

Luckily for him, instead of being cross, this action, combined with the fact that "My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard-" was blaring on the radio actually made you let out a short laugh. "What- What are you doing?"

"You looked like you could use a hug, and I happened to have one ready."

You didn't know how to respond, so you just laughed again and tapped out, pointing out that the center console was digging into your ribs.

Peter released you and you each settled back into your respective seats, where you both sit in silence- aside from the radio- for a little while.

After spending that while staring at your lap, you think to turn the radio down to a more appropriate level. By now the siren was long gone. In reality it had likely only been present for a few minutes, but it felt much longer. Looking at Peter for a moment, you finally speak again. "Um, thanks. For uh, not making this any weirder than it had to be. Sorry you had to see that." 'So much for not showing vulnerability,' you thought bitterly.

Peter scoffed lightly. "Don't be sorry. Look- I know I might not understand, but I do know it's not your fault."

You returned your gaze to your lap and he speaks up again.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

You let out a soft chuckle and smile sadly before meeting his gaze again. "Thanks, but I think I just want to go home now."

"Ok." He wasn't going to press it. He was just glad you hadn't had to go through that alone.

And so were you.

* * *

The ride home was mostly quiet. Peter could tell that while you might have been pulled from the bulk of that darkness with his radio trick, it wasn't a magic cure. It wasn't as if he had snapped his fingers and made you "instantly better." He knew better than that, and knew he should probably give you space.

You had made one request, however. That Peter not mention the incident to any of the others.

He agreed, and when the two of you finally returned to the house the two of you went about like nothing was wrong.

For Peter, it was easy.

For you, not so much.

After putting away the messages and grabbing something to eat you decided to go upstairs to try some breathing and meditation exercises you had learned a long time ago.

The last time you had a bad flashback like that was years ago, and you were shaken for several days afterward. Hopefully you could skip that this time -if that were even possible. You honestly thought you had gotten past the flashbacks. It's not like you still broke down like that every time you heard a siren "in the wild." Hell, you hadn't even had one that night Peter played it over and over again, so you didn't know why it happened today. Sure, you had lost it and screamed at him, but it didn't result in a flashback.

Was it stress? Sure you had more than enough to be stressed about lately... but surely none of that could make the flashbacks return, could it? You tried to remember what any of those therapists had said, but came up blank. Maybe you should have paid more attention during all that mandatory therapy... Maybe you should call- No. No you'd be fine. You don't need to be digging into old wounds. You just needed to 'mellow out' and take it easy for a bit. Everything will be fine if you just relax.

The exercises helped just enough that eventually you felt up to do something else, and you decided that something else would be to open your laptop and try searching some DIY spider repellent methods.

Unfortunately, once you got to your desk you were greeted with one of the little bastards sitting on top of your laptop before it skittered away to hide somewhere else on your desk when it noticed you.

Nope. No fecking way. You are not going to deal with this now. The last thing you needed right now was to have fecking spiders piled onto your nerves- more than they had already been that is. Not when you also were recovering from the incident in town.

But you also couldn't just leave it in your room…

Ok. Breathe. Just relax and you'll be fine.

Thinking quick you grab a cup with some pens from your desk, dump them out, and look to see if you can find where the spider had gone. Obviously your intent was to trap it under the glass, maybe leave it to suffocate. The spider however, had other plans, as the next time you saw it the fecker was bolting down the side of your desk and quickly scurried under the door and out of your room. Nearly gave you a heart attack too, but at least it had left your room.

Even though it was gone the whole event had sort of turned you off from sitting at your desk for the moment. Turning to grab your phone from the bed, you decide to do the research in the comfort of the sofa downstairs instead, but not before easing your door open to make sure the spider wasn't waiting right outside. Fortunately it was nowhere to be seen, and you made your way downstairs.

In the sitting room some of the others were watching TV, so you opted to sit in the rocking chair instead as you did your research.

The results were halfway promising, though did leave you wishing you had looked them up before you left the store. The most effective DIY it seemed was peppermint oil, of which you had none. The next best bets were citrus and white vinegar, which you luckily did technically have both, but the remedy called for "fresh squeezed lemons or citrus peels." Currently you only had a little bottle of lemon juice. Hopefully that would do, as you weren't looking forward to making your house smell like vinegar.

Just as you were getting up to to attempt the DIY repellent you saw two brown steaks cross the floor from under the couch. At first you were concerned they were more spiders, but you'd only be half right. One was a spider, the other was Groot- chasing the spider.

Speechless and restraining yourself from picking your feet up into the rocking chair, you witnessed the wooden child actually take a flying leap and land on the spider, which must have been nearly as wide as your hand. Then, in a move you could hardly comprehend, he shortly wrestles with the spider before putting the fecker in his mouth.

Groot looked up at you happily with half the spider hanging out of his mouth, it's legs kicking erratically as he chewed on it. All you could do is stare in disbelief- barely able to comprehend what you just saw with your own two eyes. He… ate it??? Alive??? How-??? The legs!? The thought made your stomach churn.

It didn't take long before Rocket came along and starting scolding Groot, telling him to spit it out, that he doesn't know where it's been.

Groot, apparently unwilling to part with his impromptu snack, attempted to make a face at Rocket (as his mouth was still overflowing with spider) and ran away from him, upon which Rocket gave chase, continuing to scold him as he did so.

You blinked and just sat there for a moment, processing what you had just seen. Eventually you finally decide to attempt that DIY spider repellent, and that you might like a drink while you did so.

According to the website, you needed the juice from half a lemon mixed with water and to put it in a spray bottle. Unfortunately, it didn't say how much water. You also weren't sure how much juice would equal 'half a lemon.' Come to think about it, you weren't even completely sure you had a spray bottle.

Well, might as well try to find one first before bothering with the rest.

So, first pouring yourself a drink from an opened whiskey bottle in the fridge, you set out to look under the sink to see if you had any empty spray bottles down there- only to witness a spider scurrying away inside the cabinet as soon as you opened the door.

You jolted right out of your skin and shut the cabinet. Nope. Not dealing with that. Looked like there probably wasn't an empty spray bottle in there anyway...

Taking a long swig from your glass you decided to check the bathroom closets instead.

The downstairs bathroom proved fruitless, as did the upstairs, so you tried to rack your brain on where else you might keep one, if you even had one. The only other logical place might be in the cellar, as you were fairly certain you wouldn't find one in the attic. Even so, you debated going down there as you had a feeling you just didn't have an empty spray bottle at all.

With a sigh and another sip of your whiskey you decide to go for a look.

There was no spray bottle to be found down there. There were, however, several spiders, most of them smaller than what you'd been seeing upstairs, nesting in the corners of each room in the cellar.

At this point you were starting to feel slightly nauseous. Today was just not being a good day. First you wake up to spiders, then you can't find any repellent in town, then 'the incident'-as you were calling it, and now everywhere you turned there just seemed to be more spiders. To make matters worse you couldn't even bring yourself to run up the stairs to get away from them, despite your instinct, in case someone heard you and got concerned- because there was no way in hell you were going to confess that you were running away from some damned spiders.

Upon returning to the kitchen you finished off your drink to calm your nerves and decided you'd try cooking dinner in an attempt to further settle yourself down. A simple task to put your mind elsewhere. You'd be fine. Just breathe, and focus on another task.

Fortunately, dinner went just fine. Spaghetti was the choice you made, along with the decision to cook dinner for the whole house, and you managed to do so without any unpleasantness. Everyone even got along without any bickering when it came time to sit down and eat as well.

After the dishes were done you thought you could try to top the day off by curling up in your room with the book you had intended to read the previous day. Try to end the day on a better note and then wake up to better day tomorrow.

As you obtained your book from the sitting room you noticed everyone else was either watching TV or playing cards at the table. This meant you'd likely have the upstairs to yourself for awhile, something you wouldn't argue against. Some peace and quiet was sure to help in your quest to 'mellow out.'

Thoughts of cozying up in your warm bed to read helped make you feel better as you opened the door to your room and walked inside. You weren't usually one to curl up under the covers unless you were going to bed, but you felt like you were probably overdue for a simple comfort like this.

Just as you were turning back your covers & preparing to snuggle-in your eye caught something by your pillow.

You tensed as you thought you recognized what looked suspiciously like a couple legs of a certain creature that you knew all too well and very much despised, but then you relaxed again. Took a breath. Tried to think rationally.

Surely it's not. It wouldn't be. You've never found one in your bed in your whole life of living in this house, you highly doubted they'd start now. Peter must have somehow gotten your fake spider back from Yondu and thought he'd play a prank. Probably hoping that if you were focused on a prank war your mind wouldn't be trapped in any bad thoughts or memories. That was the case, surely.

Denial is one hell of a drug.

You rolled your eyes as you reached down and lifted your pillow up, only to drop it just as quickly and jerk back from your bed.

Not only was the spider real- and huge- it had a (slightly smaller) mate. Surprisingly they didn't seem phased by you uncovering them, or your sudden movements. They just laid still, as if asserting dominance.

No. No no no. Not ok. You couldn't handle this. Not in your bed. Nope. Nope nope.

Barely breathing, you didn't even have a chance to clear your head enough to think of a solution before one of them moved- and then you bolted.

There was a brick in your stomach and you needed air. Heart was thundering in your chest and your footsteps were coming a bit rushed as you descended the stairs, but you didn't care. You just needed out. You didn't even bother to grab your jacket and only moments passed before you cleared the back door and the cold night air hit you in the face.

It was only then that you realized you also hadn't bothered to throw on any shoes, and you had regained enough presence of mind to be grateful that at least the ground was dry as you made your way toward the shed.

Not really having a plan as to where you were headed, you stopped and rested against the backside of the shed. The wood was cold against your back as you took some deep breaths, attempting to keep yourself quiet and tell yourself not to scream. It was all you could do to keep the tears back.

Perhaps if the incident in town hadn't already taken a massive hit to your defenses you might be better able to deal with this, see that it wasn't actually a world-ending event, but you weren't exactly in a current position to think rationally. All you knew is that you were NOT okay.

Spiders were in your bed! How could you sleep knowing spiders were in your fucking bed?! The thought of them crawling on you while you slept was too much. Visions of giant-ass house spiders crawling over your face filled your head. As irrational as the images may be, you couldn't help but see spiders trying to crawl in your mouth- your eyes- You felt sick, and your shaking now had almost nothing to do with the cold. You didn't know what to do, so you tried to take deeper, slower breaths, trying to still your rapidly beating heart. You just needed a moment to pull yourself together and then you could think. But you couldn't think- all you wanted to do was scream-

"Bit cold to be wanderin' without a jacket on, don't ya think?"

A gruff voice had spoken up out of nowhere beside you, and they really shouldn't have done that. Sure, they couldn't have known your current state, or that because of it this startle would have triggered a fight response in you. But it did, and unfortunately for them, before you could even think you were already swinging out to deck whoever it was in the face.

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