“…I haven’t ever known what I wanted out of life. Until now. I sort of want to be dead.”
Same Tori. Same.
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I came to put this here because it made me cry.
This is the song that Neytiri sings at the beginning of the movie and at Neteyam's funeral
I experience Neteyam
To the great mother my inside
You brought the ligtht
New life
Great joy that is in the heart
We thank you
For the nights of life
We thank you
For the days of life
O Eywa
O Eywa
Welcome, Kiri
I bring you to the family
I experience the light
A miracle arrives
A birth that comes from me
Great joy that is in the heart
Great joy that is in the heart
We thank you
For the nights of life
We thank you
For the days of life
O Eywa
This song was composed by Neytiri for Neteyam and Kiri, when she was pregnant/gave birth to Neteyam and when Kiri was born (both are the same age) that's why she says she experiences the great mother inside of her (referring to Neteyam, since he is her biological son) and about Kiri he says "welcome" and that he brings her to the family (since she is adopted) and this same song Neytiri sings at Neteyam's funeral, but the song was composed when her two were born first children (neteyam and kiri)
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"What do you want for Christmas?"
Die. To be dead.
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I'm thinking about suicide again. I just wish when i go to sleep that i won't wake up. Whatever my life doesn't matter anyways.
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I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless I am worthless
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one of the side effects of the knew anti-depressant im taking is low mood, seems a little counterproductive.
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I just want to talk to my friends. But they all have their own things to do. And they hang out with their other friends. I'm just so fucking lonely. I don't have energy to do anything, not even go to the toilet or eat or get up from bed. I'm so fucking pathetic. I'm always trying my best, but it doesn't work. I'm 15 in 3 months, i don't want to turn 15. I just don't. I want to die. I hate myself so much. I can't even look in the mirror without thinking that i'm fucking useless. And i'm crying, thats even more pathetic.
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So fucking jealous of people that have people in their life that try hard for them. They continue to try to help even when they’re being difficult and unreceptive. Meanwhile I’m practically begging and no one even glances at me. It’s not fair at all. Why do people like that get care but not me. I’m the one who spends all my time helping and being there for others. Yet no one is there for me.
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2024
Happy 2024 to everyone.. but for me this year start not very happy…
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