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public-trans-it · 15 days

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I'm already know for being very opinionated and having some Hot Takes, but I still usually keep it in line and fairly reasonable. Typical "Unpopular (but still somewhat safe to voice) Opinion" territory, where I might get some blocks and some scowls, but like, nothing major.

However I'm... gonna be posting an uncharacteristically rancid take this time.

I cannot fucking STAND vibes based design. Its become a trend lately to explain game systems by vibes, and it feels EXACTLY like the tropification of romance novels. A thing so many other people have complained about far more than I have, where so many works of fiction are now just being advertise as "Its a queer little slow burn, found family story that features enemies to lovers" OKAY, BUT WHATS THE FUCKING BOOK ABOUT?

And I feel like over the past 15-20 years, the TTRPG industry has been having the exact same issue. I can go through dozens of listings on itch.io for indie games and not see a single fucking game mechanic mentioned, and its frustrating. "This game is about gathering your friends to turn your local farm into a sustainable commune!" WHAT KIND OF FUCKING DICE DOES THE GAME USE? DOES THE GAME EVEN HAVE A GM?

And like, this isn't just about the feel good warm and fuzzy games. OSR is JUST as fucking guilty in this. "This game is a black metal death crawl through your worst nightmares." IS IT A RETROCLONE? IS IT A RULES LITE D6 SYSTEM? HOW THE FUCK DO I RESOLVE AN ACTION? DO ENEMIES USE STATBLOCKS?

If a video game showed absolutely no gameplay in any of its advertisements, only showing concept trailers and cutscenes and talking about its plot, you would probably shy away and think the game isn't worth playing if it can't even stand on the merits of its own gameplay. So why the fuck are we accepting that as the norm in TTRPGs?

#special shout out to Avery Alder #Avery I fucking love your games #The Quiet Year is one of my favorite games ever #its pretty much my go-to for any campaign of any kind to give players control over the worldbuilding pre-session 0 #BOB is so well designed and such a rad way to handle diceless/GM-less design #and I ABSOLUTE understand the need for queer designers like us to carve out a space and stand our ground #in a hobby that has historically housed people who want people like us dead in a ditch #but the idea that BOB can only support inherently queer/marginalized stories is ABSURD #and the way every BOB game advertises itself/is listed on your site makes me want to tear my skin off #please #you designed a game #AN INCREDIBLE ONE at that!#please please let it stand on the merits of its own design instead of just the vibe its built for #I was about to post this on my game design blog...#but I really dont have the heart to do that. This isn't actually about game design and the industry its just... personal frustration #and the fact that the thing that makes me autistic about games to the point to where I have spent like 25 years studying them #is just... no longer even the main focus it feels like

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gavin-reed-is-gay · 1 month

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I don’t know if we’ll ever get a dbh sequel/dlc but if we did, the team behind it would be idiots to not make it centered on Gavin and Nines, given their popularity.

Frankly speaking, two characters who basically have squat in canon are two of the most popular characters in the fandom and their relationship is rivalling the most popular relationship not only in the game but in the fandom.

I mean, there’s TWO MOVIES DEDICATED TO THEM FOR GOODNESS SAKE.

Seriously, to not cash in on the shit would be so dumb.

#detroit: become human #dbh #reed900 #I’ll be honest #am I biased here cause I genuinely enjoy r9?#yes but logically speaking if they want a sequel to dbh to be just as popular as the first one #cash in on what is popular now #which is r9 #someone else said it before but the main characters stories have already been told #if a sequel/dlc were to be made this time it would be good to focus on the characters we didn’t see much of #and just because Gavin and Nines are popular in the fandom #doesn’t mean that we know anything about them in canon #mine #mine: texts #mine: dbh

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identityquest · 1 month

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lizzie get two wolves 👍

#strato.txt #oil painting #wip #im worried ive unbalanced the composition w the second one on the right tho... its so much closer to the edge #ugh whatever. aunt lizzie is the focus here #i wish i knew what she actually looked like this is just cobbled together from general features of my family #solid build... dark curly hair... bigass ears. she could be one of my cousins. she could be me #ok rq im gonna lay out the story in the tags for anyone who hasnt seen the previous lizzie art #my great-something aunt lizzie was disabled and couldnt walk very well and she died young #she wanted to see the second floor of the farm house real bad but no one ever carried her up there and she died before seeing it #they buried her in a long white dress somewhere down at the creek. we dont know where her graves lost unfortunately #the night she was buried something wearing a white dress walked into the house and up the stairs and disappeared #and sometimes you can hear her down around the creek screaming #somewhere along the line wolves got mixed into the imagery for me #my uncle told me a story about another 'white thing' that was wolfish and would jump on cars #so i just assumed lizzie was a werewolf my whole life #anyways. i think her staying after she died was a manifestation of her desire for autonomy. maybe #maybe if shed had modern accommodations she wouldnt have felt the need to stick around. or maybe she would have idk #either way i think death afforded her control over her own desires in a way she hadnt experienced before #and i think thats why she still hangs around the creek #i hope she would like this. maybe ill take it down there and leave it out for a night when its finished so she can see

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lauronk · 5 months

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the desire to work on bus fic

the desire to work on one of my many wips now that i did the game and am thinking about them again

#i have so many half baked ideas #so many ideas i want to work on #fanfic struggles #like why does my brain do this to me #pick one story and focus you useless organ #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #on the road again (there i go)#joel and ellie #the last of us

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 1 year

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riddle, rollo, and… ace?

This kind of fits in with my other posts speculating on Masquerade part II. The previous posts were about Rollo meeting Ortho and Lilia, respectively.

***Spoilers below the cut!!***

I’ve often seen parallels being drawn between Rollo and Riddle’s backstories, which makes sense 🤔 They are both stubborn in their worldviews and try to force their idea of what is “proper and just” upon others. When their views are challenged, they spiral into rages and insist that they are correct, and that everyone else is “wrong” or “the villain”. (And, of course, on a superficial note, they lean towards fire-based magic.)

But with that in mind, now consider… Wouldn’t it be a throwback to see how Rollo interacts with Ace? All the way back in episode 1 of the main story, Ace called out Riddle for acting like a tyrant. He has continued being the voice of reason for other characters acting unreasonable across various events and vignettes, such as Ghost Marriage (to Eliza) and Endless Halloween Night (to Malleus, in Ace’s Halloween vignettes). I can 100% see Ace also putting Rollo on blast for his actions (in a Fairy Gala: If-like scenario, so same plot just played by different characters) 😂

Ace comes from a particular background which can add to the tension and drama. He is also a younger brother, has a view of magic that is very positive (he wants to be like his mage older brother), and uses his magic carelessly (ie remember when he set the Queen of Hearts on fire) or for things Rollo would deem frivolous and unnecessary (like pulling pranks on others, as he did with Deuce’s birthday present). These are all traits that make Ace very similar to Rollo’s own little brother—a brother that, may I remind you, has already passed.

There also remains the unaddressed and unresolved conflict of episode 5 in which Ace expresses disbelief that Deuce unlocked his unique magic before he did (the duo spent episode 6 mostly knocked out). Ace must be harboring some frustrations that he was not able to keep up with his rival and friend in spite of being so sure that he would be the one to surpass Deuce. These are circumstances which make Ace uniquely like Rollo—feeling upset that he does not have his magic sooner, and some unspoken disappointment and guilt wrapped up in that.

So imagine Ace being one of the people to confront Rollo 🤡 and when he’s chewing him out, all Rollo sees is an older version of his dead brother talking back and disapproving of his actions. As the SSR trio of the current Masquerade event point out, would Rollo’s brother really have been happy knowing that he’s going to such extremes, and using his brother’s death and the claim that he is “saving” others to justify it? And now here comes Ace, telling Rollo all of that right to his face while also emulating a similar energy as his brother once did. It’s like Rollo’s brother has come back from beyond to grave specifically to tell Rollo he’s disappointed in him, to tell him what he’s doing is wrong-and that would still set Rollo off, sending him into a fresh fit of rage for similar reasons as Riddle. (Yes, we are coming full circle and bringing it back to Rollo and Riddle parallels.)

Because if what they’ve been doing all along was actually wrong instead of right like they’ve been viewing it... What did Riddle do all that studying in isolation for? Why did he have to conform to these rules all his life, only to now discover that he was wrong? Why was Rollo saddled with this burden of magic, and a unique magic which will always remind him of his younger brother’s ashen end? Why did he have to stew with all of these complicated emotions while everyone else openly indulged in the sin of magic?

“Then what was the point of it all…?” What was the point of all of their suffering?! Was it all meaningless? Were their efforts worth nothing? Are their feelings and personal experiences up until this point just... pointless? Neither Riddle nor Rollo would automatically take responsibility for their own actions, nor accept fault for their harsh worldviews, so they both lashed out in anger instead.

And not only that, but there’s also a bit of Rollo in Ace--that upset associated with not being inadequate or not being able to measure up to expectations, something that Rollo never acknowledged about himself. We get brief glimpses of Rollo doubting himself, implying that his magic is a burden or a curse, or claiming that he was not able to save his brother. Yet Rollo only continued to blame others for this and tried to overcompensate/overcorrect for what was ultimately a dissatisfaction he had with himself, rather than with the world. Ace could help really drive that home as he’s escorting Rollo down the bell tower (as he’s not very tactful with his words), with just a dash of understanding his situation--because Ace is likely confused in his own way, still trying to discover what makes himself “unique”, just as Rollo is left confused about where to go from here on out.

sahdbaodbsada I just think there’s something potentially interesting to be explored between Ace and Rollo! I also just love it when Ace does a good call out 😂

#Rollo Flamme #Ace Trappola #twst #Rollo Flamm #Riddle Rosehearts #twisted wonderland #Cater is a younger sibling too but #the relationship with his sisters is not a big focus #and then you have responsible big bros like Trey and Jack shaking their heads at Rollo #Leona had strong magic at a young age like Rollo’s lil bro #but also grew up cynical because he knew his magical strength was a source of ridicule #so he started off like Rollo’s lil bro but in essence grew up to be closer to Rollo #Kalim is over here crying for Rollo’s brother 😭#he has so many younger siblings himself #he can’t imagine the pain of losing one #okay but Oasis Maker vs Dark Fire who would win???#notes from the writing raven #disney twisted wonderland #spoilers #can you tell I just really want the main story to address Ace's lack of UM #and how he feels about Deuce getting his own #right before him #even though Ace has been bullying Deuce all along about it

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redlyriumidol · 1 month

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also in that interview with gaider when he talks about how everyone was disappointed with da2 when it came out, even though the developers thought that people would accept a smaller-scale game... it's funny and kind of sad when now almost everyone loves da2 and loves that it had a contained story/setting. for many of us it's now our favourite game in the series. it's really taken so many years for people to truly appreciate it lmao and understand what they were trying to do with it... I know video game fans tend to have knee-jerk reactions to everything that is even slightly different from what they were used to in previous installments but it would be sort of nice to go into things with a more open mind. different doesn't necessarily mean bad; da2 diverging from the style of origins meant they could tell a very unique sort of story, one that in my opinion is much more intriguing than the plots of either origins or inquisition and was necessary to set the stage for any other stories within Thedas. Da2 had its problems but where would we be without it

#dragon age 2 #dragon age #i know why people keep saying they want the origins back but personally i don't.#tbh as long as i can pick different races i'm fine with all the protagonists coming from the same place.#as long as there IS something of a place.#id much rather they focus on other things like the story of the game lol.#we're never getting origins back imo. it's too complicated. and i dont blame them #i do wish inquisition had had ONE race-specific questline. that would have done a lot imo #like just having one character from each background show up #imo they could do a sort of hawke family thing where the race of your family changes but almost everything is the same #but if your character is like.. an orphan who was adopted by pirates or something id be fine with that #dragon age talks

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everythingsinred · 6 months

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Family and the Institution of Alice Academy

Was thinking about this ever since someone (I forgot specifically who, sorry) posed a question like this in the GA discord, asking about (I think) Natsume's extended family or something like that. It was a really interesting concept that I've been thinking a lot about since it was brought up, so here are the thoughts I've accumulated. I'll try to be concise but I have a LOT of thoughts and my brain is messy.

My general opinion at the end of all this thinking I did is that I don't think Academy students typically have very close familial ties after graduating.

I think the most apparent reason for that would be that students are expected to graduate when they are twenty years old. Our main four are exceptions to the rule, coming to the Academy pretty late in life. Most children are taken early, as toddlers or even babies. Natsume, Ruka, and Hotaru's families did all they could to avoid Academy scouting. Mikan was entirely accidental--if she had never met Hotaru, she might have never even found out she was an Alice to begin with. That being said, most kids were separated from their families at a very young age, only to be allowed to reunite with them once they're already adults. For many students, they've been away from their parents for close to two decades.

On top of that, the Academy doesn't allow visitations or phone calls and severely restricts letter communications. Only one child from each class is allowed to return home for one week each year, and that one week does not do much to make up for all the time spent at school.

My point is that by the time students are allowed to see their families again, that familial bond has already been severed, for all intents and purposes. That feeling of closeness and protection no longer exists. Students will feel more closeness and connection to their classmates and even to their teachers than to their parents or siblings, and as a result, I can imagine many graduates not even bothering to visit their families.

While I was pondering this, I made the connection between Academy students and the real life example of a similar situation with Janissaries from the Ottoman Empire. Basically, Janissaries were children stolen from the subjugated people under Ottoman rule. They were taken for the purpose of a "child levy", also known as a "blood tax." Some children were even willingly given by their families due to the possibility of socially advancing, and because the children were promised first class status (sound familiar?). Essentially the children were taken, forced to comply with Ottoman standards and traditions (including forced conversions and circumcisions), and then trained for military service. These soldiers would actually end up being incredibly loyal and efficient, despite likely never seeing their families again.

(Edit: forced circumcisions are particularly heinous when you consider that the children were typically at least 10 years old at the time they were taken.... so.... uh.... not pleasant.... But also interesting that the Janissaries were typically much older than the Alice children at the time of being taken.)

That level of separation doesn't endear ties; it severs them. These Janissaries--very often forcefully taken from their families--ended up growing up with very little connection to their parents or siblings. The feeling of belonging to their previous communities was gone. Absence does not always make the heart grow fonder. This was done as a means of creating a strong military force but also to disillusion subjugated communities and tear away their hope. Their children could always be taken; their communities could always be crushed, even without the use of physical force. It's a very effective tool to oppress a group of people.

(There's actually a lot of similarities between Academy children and Janissaries beside the separation of children from their families. They were also paid for their service and were high ranking; the Academy students are given an allowance and many of them, despite being stolen from their families, have a sense of superiority over non-Alices. They feel like they are treasures, and are of higher value and rank. Additionally, Academy students, especially in the DA class, are highly trained and efficient child soldiers, much like the Janissaries. Janissaries are actually a super interesting historical topic and are worth looking into!)

We can even see the effect of this distance when Yuka escapes the Academy and runs away to her family. Yuka was essentially sold to the Academy, with her parents trading her in exchange for money and status. She was very young, far too young to really understand that her parents had abandoned her. As a result, she romanticized her bond with them, and the longer she was separated from them, the more that bond became fantastical. She made many attempts to escape the school to reunite with her parents and she fantasized about seeing them again. When she finally is able to, it's nothing like she imagined. They're cold, and unfamiliar. They don't recognize her. She doesn't know her brothers. They're related, but there's no real connection.

"I shouldn't have come here."

Yuka's is an extreme example, but I'm sure she's not an exception. For most Academy students, the almost 20 years of separation from their parents would be too much to ignore. They would not recognize each other, or be close. I'm sure many parents did not sell their children like Yuka's family did, but the bond between child and family had not been nurtured the way it should have been, resulting in coldness and distance.

Because of that, I doubt most students even bother seeking their families out, or even if they do, it's to visit a few times before starting a new life with a career. That familial bond, now broken, is difficult to repair. The connections people often feel with their families or hometowns is something Academy students instead feel with each other. They are all Alices, all in the same boat together. That feeling of superiority that many kids feel means they view each other as on the same level, and I'm sure that could interfere with family connection as well.

Thus, I don't think there's many multigenerational Alice families out there with close bonds. I don't think families like Natsume's have strong ties with grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins. Even the sibling bonds at the Academy are stunted, with the Imai and Shouda siblings being the prime examples of that.

The Imai siblings have a significant age difference, yes, but additionally the Imai parents had a very different approach to Hotaru after seeing what happened with Subaru. They refused to hand her over as easily, wanting to show her important things in life and build happy memories for as long as they could. Even when Hotaru does enter the school, it's more than six months before she even comes across her brother, since the high school and elementary school are not integrated with each other and they do not belong to the same ability class. Similarly, the Shouda siblings are in different ability classes but they have a much smaller age gap. Despite this, Sumire refers to her brother very respectfully, indicating that there isn't a particular closeness.

The Imais fight against this divide, and put in genuine effort into rebuilding their relationship, but it's a difficult process, and one they struggle to admit to for a long time and for various reasons. Familial closeness is not encouraged, not even within the Academy.

(Though Natsume's bond with Aoi is exploited and the school does rely on him caring for her to take advantage of him, but ultimately he is kept from seeing her. Thus, that bond is also severed despite being exploited.)

Additionally, it would make sense to me if many Alice graduates decided to, upon having children, avoid scouting, like Natsume's parents did, and thus ended up moving around a lot to escape Academy notice. Moving around like that and laying low means that you're not going to be hosting huge family reunions or inviting relatives over often, even if all the other points were moot.

Finally, I think all this creates further obstacles for Yuka's wish to "have a family." At some point she says that, for normal people, the desire to settle down with someone and start a family is a pretty modest goal, but for Alices it's almost impossible. Escaping from the school, or even graduating, is a struggle. And you can have a kid, but it's likely that child will be taken from you, just as you were taken, and by the time the child graduates, they will have no connection with you. Wanting to be a potential grandparent, for example, might seem like a definite impossibility, since being a real parent is impossible.

It's even more proof that the Academy exists as an institution to subjugate and undermine Alices, as children and then as parents. Ultimately, an Alice never has control, not as a child and not even as an adult. The pain doesn't end once you've graduated; in fact, it never does.

#gakuen alice #ga #my meta #ga meta #azumi yuka #hyuuga natsume #alice academy #yes there are kids who lose their alices and thus leave early #i think those kids might find more luck reestablishing familial bonds #also there seem to be a few powerful and intergenerational families within the alice system #but those families seem rather to be in control of the school... theyd be the puppetmasters essentially #and thus might not be as victimized as normal families like natsume's.... he clearly has no power or control in the alice world AT ALL.#so yes i think those big and powerful families are exceptionally rare and thus not as relevant to this post #theyre not 'subjugated' like most other alice families are... idk how else to phrase that #feel free to hmu with ur thoughts on this topic! its super fascinating to me as yet another example of the academys many atrocities #and one i hadnt even properly thought of to this degree until recently!#its so very fun to discover and consider new aspects of ga lore or implications in the story! i love it so much!#i just cant see myself ever getting tired of analyzing this manga #i didnt actually narrow in on any one character but yuka seems to be the best example of my points so i focus on her the most #if u want we can talk abt other characters and families and discuss how the academy affected those bonds!#what an interesting concept.... im having a blast thinking abt all this rn

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separatist-apologist · 2 days

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All the Arina art makes me so happy. They did such a good job with it. One day when I am confident enough I will get off anon and show you my eris Arina drawings cause they live in my head rent free and that's the only acotar related thing I can draw anymore.

Can u spoil some more of the amnesia fic any crumbs really for that matter it's been weeks but I am not over it 😭😭

Okay I found it, and turns out it actually does have a title. So I threw that whole little fit for nothing. I don't remember what I shared last time, and honestly I don't know why I'm sitting on this. It's done, just languishing.

TW for child loss beneath the cut

There she was, in that beautiful white dress. And Eris was smiling, broad and unrestrained, one hand on her hip, the other holding her hand. He certainly looked like a man in love. And she….she didn’t understand herself. What could Eris have said or done that ever would have changed her mind?

“I don’t remember it,” Arina replied, tossing the phone back to Elain. She wanted to watch herself spin in circles all night, hoping something might come back. Clearly that memory wasn’t special, so why keep watching? Besides, Arina wasn’t convinced this wasn’t all some elaborate prank. It was exactly the kind of joke Lucien would have found funny once.

She might have believed that theory more had Eris Vanserra not been wheeled up, his beautiful face bruised and swollen just the same as hers. She’d been fixated on his ringless hand and the tan line where it had once clearly sat. She had the ring he’d given her—broken and ruined in the wake of the crash.

She believed they’d been together. Just like she believed he’d nearly died. Elain told him when she’d been pulled from the car, Eris’s arm had been flung against her chest, causing the break. He’d tried to protect her.

It didn’t make sense. There was something she was missing beyond her memories. Some vital understanding, some puzzle piece that, even without her memories, if she had it, would make everything else make sense.

“You will,” Elain said, just as she had been ever since Arina had broken down sobbing, flipping through her wedding album. How could she lose five years of her life. How could she forget the man she’d tied herself to, the dating, the engagement, the marriage? Beyond that, she’d missed her own life—a career, her best friend having children, moving from California up to New York.

Half a decade, just erased.

That wasn’t counting the secret Arina was keeping, too scared to admit to Elain and certainly not to the dead-eyed Eris Vanserra. When she’d woken, she’d been alone. A nurse had been fiddling with her monitor, adjusting some medication hanging beside her bed. And when Arina, confused and aching and scared, had asked what had happened, the nurse had gone for a doctor.

She’d learned, then, that outside of the internal injuries they’d had to open her up to piece back together, that she’d lost a baby. And Arina, who couldn’t even remember wanting a child, or what man that life might have belonged to, had sealed away that information.

Eris Vanserra’s child. Did he even want that baby? Had he been happy? Excited? Angry? Arina knew she couldn’t ask him, though she’d been so afraid he might ask her and she’d have to break the news that he’d lost more than just his wife in that accident.

#sometimes i feel like no one wants to read another erina story #and i should focus on elucien #i just really like writing them

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