#i wanted to draw some lov fluff ideas i had but realized it would take forever | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thatbangtanbloom · 5 years

Text

lost stars || jjk

Jeon Jungkook | lost stars

mostly angst, dash of fluff towards the end | jungkook x you

idol!jungkook, videographer!reader

Word Count: 2,728 (I got a bit carried away with this)

- “He wants the galaxy with her, but he is no bigger than a small star in the universe to her.”

She doesn't know how or why - maybe it is because the leaves crunch against the ground and gravity in the autumn or because the way he skips the sad parts in books, but she knows that the end is near and that Jeon Jungkook was not someone that her future forecasted.

She knows that when he learns the news that she has to move on, he won't understand, but it was easy to say that he rarely ever understood her. Maybe that was why she found it so hard to leave. The sun couldn't know what it meant to be the moon.

She could almost laugh, knowing that all of their actions together would be the last and he doesn't know. Silly Jungkook, barely knowing his right from left. How many lasts did she count that he did not even realize?

Their last time holding hands as he spoke animatedly about his new editing software he discovered; how he learned several new English words from his older brother, Namjoon, how for one last time he would be able to send her a cheeky bunny smile before the storm began. She knows that each second is one closer to despair and he is none the wiser. Perhaps ignorance was bliss.

She knows that this will be the last time he laughs at her as she tries to learn a new Korean word; the last time his eyes will crinkle into half-moon crescents that only Galileo could have known and she has to swallow the way her heartstrings pull. That wasn't how it was supposed to be. That wasn't what he was supposed to be.

She remembers the first time she saw him - in a mere stroke of fate from behind a screen to seeing him by mere luck a year later. She doesn't know why she is so lucky and why she is able to love a boy adored by so many but she does so happily. She is happy. She likes the way he laughs at her terrible jokes; how confused he becomes when she mentions something other than banana milk, Overwatch, or some athletic tournament.

And then she knows - she knows that something as imperfect as him and her is like a butterfly with its wings touched - a flower plucked too soon. Can't he realize how terribly imperfect they are?

“What are you thinking about?” He asks with a goofy smile as the two of them stand beside each other at the edge of the boat - only them two alone while the whole world slept - just to talk. Jungkook can not dare ignore the way his heart beats in triple time by just being near her and he knows that she is the one he wants forever with. Who else would give him the love and support he needed?

She sends him a lazy smile as she leans against the railing and shakes her head. He always asked her such simple questions - how are you? Did you eat breakfast? Were the hyungs too rough on you? You know I can take care of them if you ever ask. Questions that made her wonder if the phrase 'just friends’ applied to them.

Spoiler: It didn't.

It's something he will never admit, but it irked to him to no end that she never acknowledged him for what he was to her. He knows there is something more to them than her just informing him of his comings and goings - more than just purposely sharing food with her when he doesn't do it with anyone else - and more to them than just friends.

“I was just thinking about what I will remember when I grow older,” She replies as she taps her fingers against her cheek. She can't bare to look at him knowing that she will take the last look of him soon - to move on, not necessarily happy, but satisfied with herself for being able to leave just because she could.

“Just 'I’?” He whispers as he tucks away the camera he had been recording her with and bites on the inside of his lip. For years it had been just him in her focus, more than anything he wanted to capture every fleeting moment with her. When she talked like this - like she was moving on with no space for him to take beside her - he gripped the camera case closer.

She nods, not looking away from the moon high in the sky. She notes the way that the sun is tucked away, nowhere to be seen and she instantly wonders why Jungkook is there with her. Didn't he know better?

Jungkook bites the inside of his lip before he moves closer to her, letting his arm brush against her own as they stand side by side one another. “Do you have to be so indifferent towards me?” His intonation changes with each word and he is flustered to no end. Could she not feel the love that radiates from him?

“I'm not being indifferent… I'm being smart.” She replies as she watches the moon hover over the ocean, as though enticing the waves to pull them closer than what was gravitationally allowed. “Jungkook.. whatever this is… it isn't what is best for us. I don't want to lose myself while waiting for you to come back to me.”

Jungkook turns his head to look at her and bites down on his lip. “Are you breaking up with me?”

“Is there anything to break up?” She retorts, not able to look at him. She knows if she looks at him any longer that she will give in to his gentle gaze and soft words.

Jungkook doesn't hesitate to respond. “Yes. Ye,s there is.” He places his hand on her elbow to turn her to him and bites his lip. “I don't want you to run away from me the second I try to love you.”

Love? She nearly chokes on his words. “Jungkook..”

“I know that I'm lacking what you want.. I know I'm not brooding or strong or good with words like the guys you desire… but I love you with all my heart.” Jungkook's heart rattles against his ribcage and he wonders if he ever knew heartbreak than the look in her eyes. He hates how she could tell him to leave with tears in her eyes and his broken heart in her back pocket. “I am in love with you.. my heart bleeds just to be by your side and you pretend as though I do not understand how disappointed you look in me.” He bites down on his lip to try to settle his voice that rises in every octave.

The gentle sounds of the waves crashing against the boat is the only thing that fills the silence between the two of them. He wants her to say something - anything to reassure him that this is some cruel dream that he can wake up from.

“Do-”

“You don't love me.. you love the idea of me.” She replies as she bites down her lip. “You love the idea of someone loving you.” She whispers before closing her eyes.

“Answer me..” he whispers as he squeezes her arm gently.

She glances at him and shakes her head. “Jungkook, you can't feel that way.” She replies, ignoring his large eyes that bore into her own.

“Why not?” He asks. Jeon Jungkook hated to be told what to do, especially when it came to his emotions.

“For starters, you’re an idol.. Do you have any idea how hard it is to bounce back after a dating scandal?” She tries to reason with him, in efforts to mask her true feelings. She decides to continue, but the second reason is less effective than the first. “You only love me because I fill in the empty space of her.” She replies as she bites down on her lip. “Don't you think I realize I have feelings for someone who only likes the idea of me?” She takes in a deep breath. “You never cared about me. You only like the idea of me-”

“Isn't that the same thing as loving you? Seeing you for who you are?” Jungkook replies, feeling desperate. His lungs constricting as more time passes.

She laughed cynically and shakes her head. “That's just it… Jungkook,” She bites her lip so hard that she draws blood, tears welling up in her eyes the more time she spends with him. She hates it so much. She wants to erase. “I have always seen the way you look at her.. how happy you are just being with her.” She swallows hard, a lump filling her throat and her hands shake. She's doing it. She's pushing him away. She's moving on. “You love her so much that you never had any room for me.. so who are we kidding when I could never be her?”

Jungkook's eyes narrow at her words and his mouth falls ajar at her words. “W-what?” He stutters.

“I hope you find what you're looking in for her.” She replies in a tone barely above a whisper. “Because whatever it is.. it isn't me.” She replies - her voice barely above a whisper.

Jungkook pauses as he looks at her, eyes widening. Where was she going with this? “You're not understanding-”

“Why can't you say my name then?” She replies before raising her brows. “Why can’t you ever acknowledge me for who I am? Because you can’t. You don’t want to, and I’m not going to play second best when the guy I love is fawning over someone else. That’s not me, Jungkook, and I don’t want it to.”

And just like that, Jungkook experiences his heart break for the first time in his life. He sees it in her eyes, how tired she is of pushing away her emotions just to protect herself. He hates that he is selfish when it comes to her - that he wants her and her alone and no one else. He does not want to own her - never, that was not who Jeon Jungkook was - but he wanted her for who she was as a person in all her imperfections. He loved her for who she was, who she could be, and what she would be.

“Why is it that you make up excuses when I try to love you, Y/N? She doesn’t matter. She never did. She isn’t the one who I plan on spending the rest of my life with… she is not the one who cheers me up when I feel like the world is falling apart… She is not the one I can run to and tell my troubles. She is not the person that I trust, because the person that I trust is you, Y/N. ” He asks, glancing out to the waves that crash against the yacht. His elder members in the group now sleeping or staying late into the night to write music just as they always have. How very different their tracks of lives were, them finding their heart between the lines of sheet music and Jungkook about to have his town apart by the girl who has been by his side for the better part of five years. “Are you afraid to let me love you? Is that it?”

She looks down at her hands, how they tremble ever so slightly under the moonlight, how cold they feel against the metal railing. She contemplates what it would mean if she did listen to Jungkook, if she did consider what it meant to make that life changing cross from friendship to lovers. She wonders what it would mean to fall in love and to be loved.

But then she remembers that it will never happen, because Jungkook and her were so different. She was nothing more than a mere videographer, tasked by BigHit to record the seven members. She was meant to be behind the camera, isolated behind the lens when he was meant to be in front of it. She had plan to know her place and stay in it, but of course, it was a given that Jungkook did not care.

He dared to linger beside her as she edited videos. He asks questions, subtly staying in the contents department of BigHit for hours long after the other members have gone just to catch a glimpse of how she pouts when the editing software freezes or laughs when she adds the squeaky sound effect to Jimin when he does the slightest thing.

And Jungkook is desperate, because he is so in love with her that he can not breathe. He wants to hear her talk about her struggles after a long day of work, or how a particular class is giving her problems. He wants to be able to hold her hand when she feels like she is alone. He wants her to be the one he arm wrestles with at one in the morning just so that he can be the big spoon and nuzzle his face into the crevice of her neck. He wants the galaxy with her, but he is no bigger than a small star in the universe to her.

But he wants to be more than just the focus of a camera lens. He wants to be a part of the focus of her life, wanting to embed himself in every crevice of her life. He finds her breathtaking under the Malta moonlight, how the curve of her lips gives the slightest hint of a pout as he stares down at her. He wants to make that jump.

“Are you even listening to me?” She asks as she notices the gleam in his doe eyes. He looks hopeful, charming, every positive adjective in the English language that could illustrate his perfect simplicity.

Jungkook shakes his head. He was honest through and through. He had not been listening to her. He did not want to hear how they could not be together, a mere mess of words along the lines that he had once loved someone else, that he was an idol, and that she worked for BigHit. He wanted to risk it all if it meant being with her.

To put it simply, he was whipped.

“I want you by my side for the rest of my life. I want to wake up in the morning before you and cook you breakfast. I want to wake you up with kisses and slightly burned toast. I want to be able to kiss away all your troubles when the world seems like it is crumbling. I want to be able to run to you when I’m tired. Hell, I want you to stroke my hair and tell me I am doing okay after a long day.” Jungkook’s voice is strained, but he does not care. He feels like he is on trial and this is his last resort. He wonders if it would be too much if he dropped to his knees. He was not too proud to beg. “I want to be able to ask you to be my wife one day. I want us to have a house full of children where they all have your eyes on little me. I want us to garden together, and do scrapbooks or some shit where we look back fondly on who we used to be and smile because we never changed.Y/N… I want forever with you, by any means…. You see me for who I am, just some boy from Busan who likes banana milk and anime too much.. Please accept my love for you… because when I say I love you, I mean it.”

Silent.

She is silent throughout his entire confession. She considers the fallout this could have - how she could be risking it all for a mere boy with a bunny smile and a banana milk addiction to match… but it is hard to deny how his words and lopsided smile pull at her heartstrings. After all, everyone knows that the sun can not know what it means to be the moon. But what harm is it in trying?

Would you accept his confession? Feel free to send your reactions! Don’t be a silent reader~ :)

330 notes · View notes

rollercoasterwrite · 5 years

Text

Love Is So Nice.

One-shot written for Jjong’s Month .Here are the ones I wrote last year : Moon & Happy Birthday. And my other one for this year : Just For A Day.

Au where Jonghyun is a pink-haired barista whose dream is to be a full-time illustrator. He is older than Jinki. Minho is his best friend. Jinki’s studying in business management at uni. Also, being gay is normal, no one cares.

Plot : Jonghyun is 25 years old and has never been in a relationship. At this point, he has given up on the idea of having love in his life. Instead, he settles for having seven puppies one day.

Pairing : Jongyu

Genre : Romance, fluff, slice of life

Word count : 7.1 k ~

Love had always been a weird notion to Jonghyun. It had always been all around him in every shape or form, but it wasn’t something he believed in for himself. It’s not that he didn’t want it, but the stars just didn’t seem aligned to grant it to him.

He had always been weird, awkward, detached, but also too moody and sensitive to vibe with most people. He was a loner and despite despising that about himself, he didn’t know how to be anything else.

Social interactions were his bane and with the years he had just accepted that he couldn’t have the upper hand. He had tried to fake it until he made it, but he had just ended up feeling like he was putting on a show that didn’t have any substance.

He was 25 years old now and he was slowly starting to feel like maybe he could get accustomed to the idea of being with himself until his expiration date came about. Well, maybe he could get a few puppies to keep him company.

Yeah, that seemed like a good plan. He really didn’t need anybody to fill the social void that hollowed out his insides. He certainly didn’t need anyone to validate his existence, care for him, lov-

‘’ Hey, yo, Jjong! ‘’

The all too familiar voice got the pink-haired man out of his musings, making him scrunch up his nose in annoyance as the only human he could talk to for more than ten seconds came into his line of sight.

The tall lively brunette gave him a wide smile as he stopped in front of the counter Jonghyun was behind.

‘’ What are you doing here? ‘’ Jonghyun coldly asked as he grabbed a cloth and mindlessly traced circles on the vinyl structure he had been leaning on.

‘’ Um… isn’t this a café? Like you know, a place where people can sit and enjoy a drink and food? ‘’ Minho reminded, a note of amusement lacing his tone.

‘’ Yes, this is a café. But that’s not your scene, ‘’ Jonghyun retorted. His hand stilled over the counter. ‘’ So again, what are you doing here? ‘’

‘’ Can’t I just come by to see my best friend? ‘’ Minho pointed out with pouty lips and a bat of his eyelashes.

Jonghyun’s brows furrowed over his eyes at the annoying sight and the use of the term best friend. He didn’t understand why Minho insisted to define him in that way when he had a shitload of friends.

‘’ No, you can’t, ‘’ Jonghyun deadpanned. ‘’ You actually have to buy something. ‘’

Minho shook his head as a quiet laugh cracked his previous act. ‘’ You really are heartless, Kim Jonghyun, ‘’ he settled as he looked him in the eye.

‘’ I am going to buy something, but I’m waiting for my study partner to arrive, ‘’ he then informed.

That information made the other react instantly. ‘’ Oh my god, not again. ‘’

‘’ I know what you’re thinking, Jjong, but this is for real for real, ‘’ Minho immediately reassured. ‘’ I’m not getting that economics class at all and I can’t afford to fail it if I want to stay on the soccer team, ‘’ he vouched in a way that almost convinced the older one of his honesty.

Almost.

Jonghyun had seen this scenario unfold over and over again. Minho would find someone he liked in one of his classes, whether it be a man or a woman, would get them to study with him, usually in his dorm room, before ending the session with a late-night encounter between the sheets.

That ploy worked 100% of the time and Jonghyun had no trouble understanding why. Minho was probably one of the most attractive people he had seen in his life and compared to him, he was at the opposite side of the spectrum of social ease. He could get anyone comfortable with his charm and dashing smile.

Despite Jonghyun never openly agreeing to the self-coined term Minho used to describe this ability, he did believe he had this flaming charisma. And to be completely honest, Jonghyun was jealous of it. Maybe Minho didn’t really experience love, but at least he was getting some.

‘’ But why here this time? ‘’ Jonghyun couldn’t help but ask.

His question was answered with a roll of the eyes. ‘’ Weren’t you listening? ‘’ Minho reproved. ‘’ I really need to focus this time, so I thought it might help to not have my bed only a few meters away. ‘’

Jonghyun still had his doubts about the whole situation, but he let them slide. His friend’s conquests weren’t any of his business anyways.

‘’ Fine, ‘’ Jonghyun acknowledged before giving a look around his workplace.

His expression twisted in pure disgust as his eyes caught the same couple he had glanced at an hour earlier. Their sappy displays of affection hadn’t relented, making his desire to kick them out even stronger.

Minho followed his gaze and laughed. ‘’ Jjong, you really need to put yourself out there instead of hating on every lovebird you see, ‘’ he pointed out.

Jonghyun gave him a death stare. ‘’ I wouldn’t hate on them if they weren’t being so gross in public. There are other places to do that, ‘’ he sharply argued.

The brunette’s shoulders shook with laughter again. Before Jonghyun could even realize, he brought a hand to his hair and ruffled it affectionately. ‘’ Lighten up, Jjongie. ‘’

The older one all but huffed before the sound of the door opening caught his attention. Before he could bring himself to greet the newly arrived customer, Minho straightened up and charged towards him.

‘’ Jinki! ‘’ Was the name he heard the latter say before he trapped the smaller one into a hug. Jonghyun almost snorted when he caught the discomfort on the other’s face. Minho had never really known boundaries; he always acted on impulse.

‘’ Come on, I want to introduce you to someone first, ‘’ Minho indicated as he gestured for the other to follow him.

Jonghyun felt himself panic, but that feeling was cut short by his friend’s never-ending forwardness.

‘’ Jinki, this is my best friend, Jonghyun, ‘’ Minho filled in with a prideful smile.

‘’ Nice to meet you, Jonghyun, ‘’ Jinki said with a quick bow of the head before he flashed a smile of his own.

Jonghyun’s heart flipped inside his chest at the sight of it. He had never seen a smile so bright, so warm.

If it weren’t for the sound of Minho clearing his throat, Jonghyun probably would’ve stayed stuck in his stance for an embarrassingly long time.

‘’ Nice to meet you too, Jinki, ‘’ Jonghyun echoed as the cogs of his mind began moving again.

They held each other’s gazes silently for a few more seconds before Jonghyun remembered what his purpose was. He quickly bent down behind the counter and sprung back up with two menus in hand.

‘’ Here you go, ‘’ he quickly said before he turned the other way to make sure everything was in its right place.

He naturally eavesdropped on their conversation as he moved this and that around and pretended to wash a few cups that didn’t really need washing. It might’ve been only five minutes before Minho called him again, but that short lapse of time was enough for him to figure out that this study session might not just end with his friend getting a better mark.

‘’ I’ll take an iced black coffee and a blueberry muffin, Jjongie, ‘’ Minho indicated before turning towards the other brunette.

‘’ Oh, and I’ll have a macchiato with an almond croissant, please, ‘’ Jinki said with another warm smile.

‘’ Yes, sure. You guys can settle at a table, it’ll be ready in a few, ‘’ Jonghyun quickly uttered as he tried to ignore the acrobatics that his heart was doing again.

He almost sighed in relief as they finally moved farther away from him. He got to working on their orders, trying to keep his mind blank. But he found it harder than expected when the sound of his friend’s familiar laughter brought along with it a warm and full laugh, one that almost made him overfill the cup he was holding.

He caught himself just in time, silently cursing himself for his lapse in focus. What the fuck is wrong with me? He mused as a scowl darkened his features. Without the inkling of an answer forming in his mind, he gathered himself to get all the items on a tray and turned around again.

He was grateful that his grip on the tray was tight, because when his eyes caught chocolate ones again, he felt weak in the knees.

***

A few days passed and Jonghyun still held on solidly to his future plan of living with seven puppies (he had finally settled on a number). He had even started visualizing the house they would live in and was now thinking about the names he could give them. He had already decided on the first one and even knew what breed he wanted her to be. For whatever reason, she had to be a her and a dachshund.

The thought of it brought a small smile to his face as he poured some coffee in a to-go cup. The café was about to close and he couldn’t wait to settle comfortably on his bed to do some drawing. He had gotten behind on some commissions and needed to catch up.

Just as he was covering the carton cup with a plastic lid, the door opened, making him jump slightly. Before he could even think about being annoyed by the last-minute intrusion, an expression of surprise crossed his features as his eyes met the person who had just come in.

‘’ Good evening, Jonghyun, ‘’ Jinki timidly said as he hid his hands in his jeans’ pockets.

Jonghyun’s brows furrowed between his eyes in confusion. ‘’ Good evening… ‘’ he slowly replied.

‘’ I know it’s late and you were probably about to close, but I have to stay up to catch up on my studying, so if it’s okay, I’d really love to have a coffee to go. ‘’

The other’s fast-paced explanation took a few seconds to register in Jonghyun’s mind. When it did, he slowly nodded.

‘’ Can you just flip the sign outside for me so no one else comes in? ‘’

His request was heeded on the spot and soon he found himself looking into those rich brown eyes again.

‘’ So what would you like? ‘’ he instantly asked, already thinking of the relief he’d feel when he’d find himself alone again.

If it were any other customer, it wouldn’t have been such bother, but this was his friend’s… study partner, if there was any truth in what Minho had told him. Plus, he hadn’t forgotten about how unsettled he had felt when he had first met him.

‘’ Just a plain dark roast coffee, ‘’ Jinki naturally replied, his fingers tapping lightly on the countertop.

‘’ Okay, ‘’ Jonghyun acknowledged. ‘’ It won’t be long, ‘’ he indicated before giving his usual courtesy smile.

He got the machine going again and let it do its magic before turning around to pull out another carton cup and plastic lid. He felt overly conscious of his every move like it was usually the case when another human being was near him, but for some reason, it felt even worse now. He kept facing the other way until the coffee was ready.

A few seconds later, he was presenting the brunette with a freshly brewed coffee to go. ‘’ Here you go. Have a nice evening, ‘’ he quickly uttered.

His heart jumped inside his chest when the other’s fingers brushed against his to grab the cup. Jonghyun’s eyes widened at the feeling, making him turn around immediately.

‘’ Thank you, Jonghyun, ‘’ Jinki expressed in a soft tone.

Jonghyun didn’t say anything else, too afraid to embarrass himself even more.

He finally heard footsteps heading the other way and when the door finally closed on itself again, he released a long sigh.

He didn’t know what was going on, but he really hoped this was the end of it.

***

A few days passed without any other disturbing encounters and Jonghyun was more than happy about it. He had figured out the perfect life for himself and didn’t need anything or anyone to start messing with that in any shape or form.

Jonghyun knew himself. His heart barely needed a spark to create a full-blown fire. The last time that had happened, extinguishing the flames had been almost a never-ending task and from that moment on, he had promised himself he would never go through that again.

Fires were too dangerous and he was no firefighter.

He was only another young man trying to make his dreams come true by working in a café to support himself until his side gig could become his main thing. That was his path towards happiness. And a life full of puppies of course.

He headed towards another afternoon shift with that certainty in mind, a smile dancing on his lips.

But his smile fell as soon as he entered the café and caught a certain someone’s presence. Jonghyun headed straight towards the back, quickly greeting his colleague, before rushing to hide in the employees’ room.

Panic rose inside him as he thought of having to face the other again.

What is he even doing here?

Okay, Jjong, calm down. This is a café, he can come by for a drink.

But why here?

Maybe he’s meeting Minho here again…

Yeah, that’s it.

Calming himself down with that thought, he changed into his black uniform and finally stepped out to settle behind the counter. He immediately initiated small talk with his younger colleague to distract himself. The other went on about his day and Jonghyun tried really hard to pay attention, but it was practically impossible as he felt a gaze on him.

He didn’t dare look back, but there was no doubt in his mind whose gaze it was.

He prayed for Minho to step in and steal the show, but his arrival never occurred. An hour passed during which Jonghyun and his colleague had enough customers to distract themselves for a bit, but not enough that Jonghyun couldn’t catch the glances that were thrown his way a few tables away from where he was.

Soon after, his colleague’s shift ended and the traffic slowed down drastically, leaving him to panic again. He dared give a look towards his table and found him looking at his laptop’s screen, brows furrowed in deep concentration. The sight had Jonghyun captivated despite himself.

He suddenly wondered what this man’s story was. His passions, his dreams, his fears… Before snapping himself back to attention with a slight shake of the head.

No. I don’t need to know that.

What he did need to know was why this man had decided to come study here if he wasn’t meeting up with Minho. His mind kept running with the question on a track that seemed to have no end, making frustration grow inside him more and more.

Fortunately for him, the door opened just as he was about to lose his mind. His face lit up with joy as Minho stepped in.

‘’ You’ve never looked so happy to see me before, ‘’ the younger one bantered as he stopped in front of him.

Jonghyun immediately toned it down a notch, retrieving his more neutral expression. ‘’ I’m just relieved you didn’t stand up your study partner, ‘’ he casually noted.

Minho’s eyes widened. ‘’ Eh? ‘’

Jonghyun frowned. ‘’ Jinki’s been here for a few hours now. Weren’t you meeting up with him? ‘’

The same surprised expression stayed stuck on the other’s face before he turned around.

Jonghyun followed his gaze, but immediately brought it back towards the counter when Jinki looked their way.

‘’ Ah, Minho, glad to see you, ‘’ Jinki warmly greeted.

‘’ Same here, Jinki, ‘’ Minho reciprocated with a smile before turning back again.

‘’ We had no plans to study together, Jjongie, ‘’ he then told him as he crossed his arms on the counter.

Jonghyun frowned again when a mischievous smile crossed the other’s lips.

‘’ Why are you smiling like that? ‘’

‘’ Just because, ‘’ Minho shrugged before giving a quick look behind him again. ‘’ I guess Jinki really likes this place, huh? ‘’

‘’ He’s only been here three times, ‘’ Jonghyun retorted.

‘’ He came here another time? ‘’ The younger one all but yelled as his eyes doubled in size again.

The death stare Jonghyun gave him made him calm down. In a hushed voice, he said, ‘’ Jinki doesn’t even live in the area. He’s a rich kid, Jjong. ‘’

Jonghyun blinked a few times, his mind paralyzed from the new input.

Minho’s chuckle snapped him out of it. ‘’ That’s why he didn’t fall for my irresistible charm… You caught his attention. ‘’

The satisfied smile Minho was sporting as he looked at him made him want to punch him in the face.

‘’ Stop being ridiculous, Minho, ‘’ Jonghyun scowled.

‘’ Tell me that again when he gets into your pants, ‘’ Minho teased, wiggling his brows.

Jonghyun felt his face heat up at the gross thought. ‘’ Could you please shut up, Minho? ‘’

His words came out in a snarl as anger stepped in to shield him from the other emotions that were menacing to overwhelm him.

But Minho didn’t relent. ‘’ You’d be in luck, Jjongie. From what I could see, he’s packing good stuff down there. ‘’

Jonghyun turned the other way as he felt his ears burn. The other’s smug laughter only added salt to the wound, making him now wish his friend could disappear.

‘’ He’s cute, Jjongie… Very cute, ‘’ Minho said, a slight purr lacing his voice. ‘’ When he does come on to you, please don’t be jerk, ‘’ he then advised.

Jonghyun immediately turned back around at that. ‘’ Even if what you’re saying holds any truth, who says I’m interested? ‘’

A boisterous laugh left the other. ‘’ Oh my god, Jjong, please… ‘’

The older one’s jaw clenched. He didn’t know what was so funny, but he certainly wasn’t laughing. Maybe when Minho would finally shut his trap, would he tell him about his wonderful life plan, so they would never have another conversation like that again.

‘’ I’m happy for you Jjongie, I really am, ‘’ Minho voiced in a softer tone as he wiped away the tears that had pearled at the corners of his eyes.

‘’ There’s nothing to be happy about, ‘’ Jonghyun shot back before pointing to the door.

‘’ Can you please leave now? ‘’ he urged as his patience level reached under 0.

‘’ Of course, sweetheart, ‘’ Minho said a little too loudly to Jonghyun’s liking before he leaned closer to him and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

Jonghyun completely froze, dumbfounded by his friend’s action. He stared at him in horror when he finally pulled away.

‘’ What the fuck, Minho? ‘’ he raged under his breath.

The latter grinned. ‘’ See you later, Jjongie, ‘’ he replied with a wink.

Before Jonghyun could pull out an answer out of him, the tall brunette strode towards the door and left.

After a few minutes of staring in anger at the door, Jonghyun finally recovered his wits and remembered where he was and how he was supposed to act. He grabbed a cloth again and cleaned the spot on the counter that Minho had leaned on before giving a quick look around.

He felt his face get warm again when he found dark eyes looking right at him.

***

It was pouring like crazy outside and Jonghyun was counting down the minutes until he could get back home. No one had stepped into the café in hours and he was pretty sure no one would for the rest of the day.

Boredom was driving him crazy and the last cup of coffee he had just taken did nothing to alleviate his sleepiness. He had spent the whole night up working on drawings before having to come here to open the shop.

He was working solo from opening to closing since he was the only employee who didn't have academic constraints. He didn't mind it though; he had always preferred working alone.

Nonetheless, his brain still needed a little stimulation. Staring out the shop's window at the rain pouring had had its charm for a few minutes, but his mind had quickly asked for more.

It had started asking questions and going down certain paths, but Jonghyun had shut them down immediately.

His fingers were now itching to hold a pencil and draw, but he was scared that the moment he acted on his desire, a customer would walk in.

He let another fifteen minutes go by before finally giving in. He rushed to the back and came back with a notepad and a pencil. He naturally started drawing a dachshund because his obsession had just grown even stronger over the past few days. He knew he had to get one soon to make sure he’d stay on the right track. He smiled as he stared back at the puppy he had brought to life just from the touch of his pencil on a paper.

He then looked at the clock and scrunched up his nose. Only 10 more minutes had gone by. He gave a quick look to the door again before he flipped the page to start over on a new one. This time he just let his hand direct the pencil whichever way it wanted to go.

He found himself outlining someone’s face and got excited at the idea of having a new original character to work with. He operated fast, keeping his mind out of the process, every stroke of his pencil bringing him closer to a new life, to a new story to add to his imaginary world.

But when he stared back at the final product, his excitement totally dropped and in its place, fear rose fiercely inside him. Without thinking, he ripped the drawing apart in as many pieces as he could before throwing them out in the bin behind him.

Jonghyun stepped back away from it, still shaken by what had just happened. He closed his eyes to regain his composure, but the sound of the door suddenly opening put him on edge again. He turned back around only to have his heart leap inside his chest as he stared wide-eyed at the one who had just entered.

A soaked-looking Jinki shook off some water from his hands before stepping in further.

‘’ It’s open, right? ‘’ He asked with a worried look as he glimpsed around.

Jonghyun could only nod, shaken to the bone by the sudden overlap between his mind’s work and reality.

While he just stood there, the other moved forward until the counter became the only thing separating them.

‘’ I really need something warm right now, ‘’ he softly said before his face lit up with yet another big smile.

The pink-haired barista instantly grew hot in the face and shied away to keep himself safe.

‘’ You can sit… I’ll bring you the menu, ‘’ he managed to say despite the turmoil racking his body.

‘’ No need for that, I know what I want. ‘’

The instant reply had Jonghyun look his way again, a hint of surprise glinting in his eyes.

‘’ Oh, okay… ‘’

Jonghyun felt his chest and throat tighten as the brunette didn’t follow with any words, but instead gave him an intent look.

‘’ So… what can I get you? ‘’ he went on, his words tumbling out of his mouth with an uneasiness that just made him feel ten times worse.

‘’ I’d like a black coffee… ‘’ Jinki slowly said.

‘’ Okay sure, I-

‘’ And a date with you, ‘’ the brunette quickly added.

Jonghyun’s mouth fell open as his eyes widened in disbelief. If it wasn’t for the dark blush that instantly stained the other’s cheeks, he would’ve been sure his mind was playing tricks on him.

‘’ E-excuse me? ‘’ he blurted out nonetheless.

Jinki seemed to recoil into himself, but he still answered.

‘’ I'm sorry for being so forward, but after I saw you and Minho together I thought that I shouldn't lose my chance. ‘��

Jonghyun's brows furrowed at that. ‘’ Minho? He's just-

‘’ A friend. I know, I made sure of that, ‘’ Jinki swiftly cut in.

Jonghyun's mouth shut close as his brain imploded from all the other had just said.

‘’ Is that too creepy? ‘’ Jinki picked up as he watched the other's terrified expression with worry.

Jonghyun couldn't really say anything to that when he had just caught himself drawing his face on instinct.

‘’ I... It's just... ‘’ Jonghyun took in a sharp inhale, closing his eyes for a second.

‘’ I don't understand. ‘’

The words rang heavily in the air, leaving a few seconds of silence behind them.

‘’ What don't you understand? ‘’

The question came out of the brunette carefully, quietly.

Jonghyun's answer was much more assured. ‘’ Why not Minho? ‘’

Jinki's face lit up with surprise before it darkened with a frown.

‘’ He's not my type. ‘’

Jonghyun's shoulders relaxed unbeknownst to him, but his mind remained doubtful.

‘’ This doesn't make any sense... ‘’ He dismissed with a shake of his head.

‘’ You don't know me. So how can I be your type? ‘’

The words fell from his mouth sharply, making Jinki look back at him with shame, finally tearing his gaze away when his expression grew even more serious.

‘’ I don't know what to say... ‘’ Jinki shyly admitted as he stared down at the counter.

Jonghyun felt a hybrid sense of satisfaction and sadness swell in his chest at the admission.

‘’ Maybe it's something as shallow as physical or sexual attraction, but to be honest, I really feel like it's more than that, ‘’ Jinki suddenly shared as he seemed to emerge from a deep train of thought.

‘’ I feel like if we got to know each other, we could... ‘’

Jonghyun felt his heart race at the sight of the brunette blushing again.

‘’ We could what? ‘’ he pressed as he forgot himself.

Jonghyun caught the slight waver that troubled the other's gaze, making him even more impatient.

‘’ We could fall in love. ‘’

***

Love had always been a weird notion to Jonghyun. So weird that when the opportunity to experience it had knocked on his door, he almost hadn't answered.

Staying in with his imaginary precious puppies seemed like a far better and safe plan, but what Jonghyun realized was that love didn't just knock once and leave if ignored. It did whatever it took to get the attention it deserved.

Jonghyun finally gave in to the idea of considering their regular interactions as being something more than two people being polite with each other when Jinki held his hand one night after they came out of a movie theater.

The acrobatics his heart did at that moment made him sure his final minutes were upon him before he realized his heart only seemed to go crazy like that when he was around Jinki.

The feeling scared the shit out of him, but the patience and care the other deployed towards him comforted him enough not to skip town and hide away forever.

It was another few weeks before Jonghyun's heart condition worsened. He literally felt it burst inside his chest when Jinki first kissed him on the doorstep of his mother's house. The only thing that saved him from not collapsing to the floor was Jinki's strong hold around his waist.

That same night, Jonghyun decided that his heart wouldn't have enough space for seven puppies and a full-grown man.

One puppy and a full-grown man would do just fine.

That plan settled well within him until they had their first fight two weeks later. It was a misunderstanding about one of Jinki’s acquaintances, but before it could be cleared up, Jonghyun experienced the horrible pain of feeling his heart break in a million pieces. It took a while for it to hold together again, but with extra communication (which didn’t come to Jonghyun easy), reassuring kisses and time, it did.

And it changed. Jonghyun found himself being much more vulnerable and open which only made their connection deeper. In the process, he felt himself become more soft, needy and clingy around the other until he couldn’t get enough of the few hours they spent with each other almost every day.

One night, Jonghyun found himself asking the other to stay the night. It was his first time asking anyone to stay over.

‘’ Are you sure? ‘’ Jinki softly asked as he rubbed circles with his thumb over the other’s wrist.

They were standing in front of Jonghyun’s house again after an evening out to a restaurant and a follow-up at a small local bar.

Jonghyun had only had one drink, but still, he found himself blaming the alcohol for the words that left his mouth afterwards.

‘’ Yes, I think I’m ready. ‘’

He blushed furiously as Jinki’s eyes widened in shock. ‘’ You mean… ‘’

‘’ I don’t know… I just… I want you to stay, ‘’ Jonghyun sputtered as he fumbled with his own embarrassment.

‘’ Isn’t your family inside, I mean… ‘’

‘’ No, ‘’ Jonghyun quickly filled in. ‘’ My mom and sister went to visit family. ‘’

Jinki’s face relaxed before lighting up with a sweet smile. ‘’ I’ll gladly stay, baby. ‘’

Jonghyun felt his stupid, weak heart flip at the pet name. Before he could think more about it, he pulled the other inside and closed the door behind them.

That night Jonghyun finally let love inside. It spread through him like wildfire as it reached deep within him, making his heart stop momentarily before it exploded behind his eyes.

When he looked into Jinki’s eyes, he could see that his heart had exploded too.

***

‘’ Hellooo! ‘’

Jonghyun abruptly came out of the daze he had inadvertently been plunged into only to see Minho’s lips curl into a wicked grin.

‘’ I know that face. ‘’

‘’ Huh? ‘’ Jonghyun let out, dumbfounded.

Minho chuckled. ‘’ Jinki took your innocence, huh? ‘’

Jonghyun’s eyes widened before he felt heat flush his face, making him look away and grab a cloth again.

‘’ I don’t know what you are talking about, ‘’ he feigned as his hand moved in a circular motion over the vinyl counter.

The other snickered at that before leaning as close as he could from the other side of the counter. ‘’ So…’’ He all but purred. ‘’ Was I right? Is he packing good stuff? ‘’

Jonghyun glared at his friend’s malicious grin, very tempted to wipe it off his smug face, but too discomforted by his body’s reaction to the question to actually go through with it. Plus, he was at work, so he had to stay professional.

‘’ That’s none of your fucking business, ‘’ he simply retorted.

‘’ Oh come on, Jjong. I tell you everything, ‘’ Minho wildly protested as Jonghyun turned the other way to sort out some utensils.

‘’ That’s your problem, not mine, ‘’ he curtly dismissed.

There was a pause, but Jonghyun knew better than to turn back around. That’s exactly what the other wanted.

‘’ So it’s like that, huh? ‘’ Minho finally said, his tone heavy with frustration. ‘’ Fine. I can leave. ‘’

Jonghyun rolled his eyes at the other’s childish antics before giving in to his pathetic threat.

‘’ Stop asking me stupid questions and I’ll stop ignoring you, ‘’ he indicated as if it were the most basic principle in the world.

Minho snorted. ‘’ You should be extra nice to me. I’m the reason you met Jinki, ‘’ he reminded.

‘’ How could I ever forget? ‘’ Jonghyun returned, exasperation clear in his voice. ‘’ You keep reminding us every chance you get.

‘’ Do you want a medal or something? ‘’ he then added when he saw Minho’s expectant look.

His grumpiness quickly subsided when his friend’s expression suddenly became sullen.

‘’ No, I don’t want a medal, Jjong, ‘’ the tall brunette squarely replied. ‘’ What I want is for things to stay the same between us, ‘’ he then shared before his lips tightened into a grim line.

Brows furrowed, Jonghyun immediately asked, ‘’ What do you mean? ‘’

‘’ I barely see you anymore, Jjongie, ‘’ Minho answered in the quietest voice Jonghyun had ever heard from him.

That made his stomach knot with guilt. ‘’ I’m sorry, Minho… I just-

‘’ You’re in love, ‘’ Minho completed in his stead as the hint of a smile tugged at the corners of his lips.

‘’ And I’m so happy for you, I really am, ‘’ he went on to clear up the cloud of guilt he could see in his friend’s eyes.

‘’ Just don’t forget about your old pal Minho, ‘’ he finished, his smile still elusive.

‘’ I would never, ‘’ Jonghyun dismissed in a heartbeat, a little hurt that the other would ever think that. But he couldn’t blame him, he knew how he could be. That could only help remind him that he could do a better job at showing Minho how much he meant to him.

Minho’s face finally brightened into a real smile. ‘’ Great, ‘’ he acknowledged before going on excitedly.

‘’ When are you getting off, we could do something if you want… ‘’

Jonghyun offered him an apologetic look. ‘’ Um… Jinki’s supposed to come by later… ‘’

‘’ But we can do something this weekend. Whatever you want, ‘’ the pink-haired young man quickly proposed as he caught the immediate slump of the other’s shoulders.

That seemed enough to stop the wave of disappointment that had menaced to wash over the brunette.

‘’ Yaaay, ‘’ he cheered before laughing softly.

‘’ I’ll let you be then, I should actually be studying, ‘’ he then indicated, scrunching up his nose in disgust.

Jonghyun couldn’t help but laugh at that. ‘’ Yes, you should, ‘’ he encouraged. ‘’ Got any new study partners? ‘’

His teasing tone had Minho pouting. ‘’ No. I’m done with that. ‘’

Jonghyun brought a hand over his mouth as he laughed again. ‘’ Okay, if you say so, ‘’ he managed to utter once he settled a bit.

With a huff, the brunette said, ‘’ That’s my cue to leave. See you later, Jjong, ‘’ he added as his face relaxed into another smile.

Jonghyun smiled back. ‘’ See you soon, ‘’ he echoed before the other turned on his heel, walked towards the door and left.

For a few seconds, Jonghyun just stayed there, letting himself appreciate the fact that he was truly lucky to have such a friend in his life.

His eyes then travelled upwards to the clock before him as the image of another man he loved very much flashed in his mind. Excitement instantly tingled in his stomach as he realized that in less than two hours, he’d be able to see him again.

***

Jonghyun didn’t think he had ever seen something more beautiful than Jinki’s smile. His heart always stopped whenever he witnessed it and right now was no exception. As the handsome brunette walked up to him with a grin that reached his eyes, he truly prayed that his heart would remember how to work.

Fortunately, he didn’t die in the seconds that followed even when Jinki wrapped his arms around his small waist.

‘’ How was work, baby? ‘’ Jinki softly asked, smile still dancing on his lips.

‘’ It was okay… I missed you, ‘’ Jonghyun immediately shared as he wrapped his arms around his neck.

‘’ I missed you too… a lot, ‘’ Jinki said as he pulled the smaller one a little closer.

A quiet gasp left Jonghyun as Jinki claimed his lips. He sighed at the softness of the other’s lips and the tightening hold around him before a moan tore from his throat when Jinki’s tongue found its way into the warmth of his mouth to meet his. One of his hands instinctively went to the back of the taller one’s neck as the kiss deepened.

Jonghyun didn’t even mind that they were in front of his workplace, not when he was finally getting what he had been craving for the past two days. Closeness.

He didn’t let go of him even when they had to pull away from the kiss to catch their breaths.

‘’ What do you want to do? ‘’ he quietly asked in the small space left between them, his chest slightly heaving.

‘’ Whatever you want to do, ‘’ Jinki instantly replied, a sweet smile cracking his lips again.

Jonghyun averted his gaze as he felt himself blush. ‘’ I didn’t think of anything… ‘’

A soft laugh shook Jinki’s shoulders. ‘’ It’s okay, we can just walk a bit, it’s a beautiful evening. ‘’

Jonghyun nodded and a second later, they were walking side by side, their hands naturally finding each other's.

A comfortable silence settled between them, the fresh breeze of the fading day softly brushing over their skins as they basked in the simplicity of the moment.

An overwhelming sense of happiness took over the smaller one's body as he realized how perfect this moment was.

Under the darkening blue canvas that was the sky, adorned with accents of orange and pink, he was just a drop of life that had against all odds found his match amidst the ocean that was the billions of people on this planet.

The thought had a crooked smile tugging at the corners of his lips, his gaze mindlessly following the movement of his feet.

‘’ What are you smiling at? ‘’

The sudden inquiry made his heart jump inside his chest before he gave a look to his left. Meeting chocolate eyes, he said, ‘’ Nothing, I’m just… happy, ‘’ he pinpointed before a bashful smile swept across his lips.

‘’ I hope I have something to do with that, ‘’ Jinki teased with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

A soft laugh tumbled out of Jonghyun’s mouth. ‘’ You have everything to do with it, ‘’ he confirmed as he squeezed the other’s hand tighter.

The brunette grinned. ‘’ Same goes for me, Jjongie. ‘’

They kept on walking for a while, sharing smiles every few seconds, before the brunette brought them to a halt.

‘’ Oh, Jjongie, look, ‘’ he said as he pointed to the other side of the street.

The older one followed his gaze instantly. Embarrassment tightened his chest as he recognized the place.

‘’ Why would you even mention that? ‘’ Jonghyun reproached with a slight pout.

‘’ How could I not? ‘’ Jinki countered with a chuckle. ‘’ It’s where we had our first date. ‘’

Jonghyun snorted. ‘’ You called that a date? ‘’

‘’ Yeah, definitely, ‘’ Jinki answered on the spot. ‘’ After that, I knew I wanted to spend as much time as I could with you. ‘’

A furious blush colored the other’s cheeks as heat pulsed through his body. ‘’ Stop saying ridiculous things… ‘’

‘’ I’m not, ‘’ Jinki argued with a fond smile. ‘’ You were blushing a lot too that night and you were so damn cute, it was hard not to kiss you, ‘’ he reminisced as he brought his free hand up to caress Jonghyun’s cheek.

The latter’s lashes fluttered against his soft touch as he tried to calm the wild reaction of his heart.

‘’ I was a mess, ‘’ he persisted as he remembered how awkward he had been. That whole night had just been a stressful nightmare and he had been sure at that moment that the brunette would never want to see him again.

‘’ You were the most adorable mess then, ‘’ Jinki settled before planting a kiss on his pink shock of hair.

‘’ Whatever, ‘’ Jonghyun brushed off, still battling with embarrassment.

Laughing a soft, breathy laugh, Jinki said, ‘’ We can always have a do-over if you want. It’s right there. ‘’

Jonghyun scrunched up his nose in disgust. ‘’ I’d rather not. They don’t even have good rum. ‘’

‘’ Oh right, ‘’ Jinki instantly recalled. ‘’ Yeah, let’s find some other place. ‘’

‘’ How about we go to your place? ‘’ Jonghyun proposed, his voice low.

‘’ Do you have anything in mind? ‘’ Jinki inquired not without a hint of mischievousness.

‘’ No… ‘’ Jonghyun’s voice trailed as he leaned a little closer, lips almost brushing the other’s ear. ‘’ Just wanna be alone with you. ‘’

He glanced on the slow bob of the taller one’s Adam’s apple as he pulled back a bit, the sight making his stomach flutter.

‘’ That sounds perfect, ‘’ Jinki settled with a slight strain of urgency in his voice.

The next second he was leading them the other way, almost dragging the smaller one into a fast walk as if they were going to be late somewhere.

Jonghyun fought back a laugh at the other’s eagerness. ‘’ There really is no rush. ‘’

‘’ Hmm, I will have to disagree with you on that one, ‘’ Jinki replied, eyes set straight ahead.

Jonghyun now couldn’t help breaking into laughter at his boyfriend’s serious expression. The latter looked his way and a second later, his face relaxed into a smile.

‘’ I’m glad I was right, ‘’ Jinki pondered out loud.

‘’ Hmm? ‘’ Jonghyun hummed as a cute frown creased his brow.

‘’ About us, ‘’ the brunette shared. ‘’ Being with you … feels amazing, ‘’ he went on, his dark eyes locking with paler ones.

Jonghyun felt himself blush again. ‘’ I’m glad you were right too, ‘’ he said, his voice all but a whisper.

Jinki’s smile made him smile again before they both looked ahead, minds basking in the promise of another lovely evening together.

Jonghyun couldn’t help but think that love was still weird, love was still scary, but being with Jinki made all of that pale in comparison to what love felt to him right now.

It just felt…

So nice.

***************************************************************************************************************************

AFF AO3

#jongyu #jjongsmonth #sarastuff:jongyu #jonghyun #onew #shinee #minho #a few weeks later Jinki asks him to move in with him and Jjong says yes #and a few weeks after that they get the puppy and they call him Roo ofc because she pees on Minho when he visits them XD #this is my attempt at fluff #I'm glad I got it completed before the month of May #and ofc the song that inspired it was Love is so nice and towards the end also Anna Wintour cause that song is full of love too #tell me what you think #happy jjongsmonth #aff and ao3 links at the end #this story is semi-autobiographical XD

47 notes · View notes