#i was a child

[placetovent306]

"You are so mature for your age." Well, at least one of us had to act mature in this shithole excuse of a family.

#dysfunctional family #daddy issues #mommy issues #i was a child #child abuse #trauma #bpd vent #vent #vent post #bpd problems #bpd stuff #bpd #actually borderline #bpd feels #bpd blog #bpd shit #bpd things #actually bpd #bpd thoughts #bpd mood #i'm so tired #borderline personality disorder #borderline blog #being borderline #childhooh trauma

[i-give-u--stuff]

MARY CHRISTMAS. : DDDDD.

HAPPY HANUKKAH :))))))))

HAPPY KWANZA :}}}}}}

#meme #fnaf #fnaf movie #fnaf memes #five nights at freddy's #five nights at freddys #fnaf mike #five nights at freddys movie #fnaf fan art #william afton #fnaf meme #fnaf theory #i was a child #christmas #hanukkah #kwanzaa

[sometimesraven]

14 years since fish custard

Fourteen years since I truly saw myself on screen for the first time. A broken little girl who grew up too fast, whose entire self worth was based on her body.

Fourteen years since the loneliest little girl who put all her faith in a madman with a box saw on screen the loneliest little girl who put all her faith in a madman with a box.

Fourteen years since my only friends were characters in a daft little science fiction show whose only friend was a daft little science fiction man.

Fourteen years since I saw a character with all my coping mechanisms, all my abandonment trauma and self-harmful borderline-suicidal tendencies.

Fourteen years since I was first told I could still be loved despite them. That I wasn't stupid or childish or delusional for putting my love and faith and care into someone who nobody believes is real.

Fourteen years since fish custard and, ironically, fourteen years since the month I turned fourteen.

#vent #about #mine #dw #doctor who #i'm having a lot of feelings #i was a child #i didn't deserve that #and i will never ever forget that moffat was the first person to tell me that no #no i didn't deserve that #i deserved to be believed and taken seriously and loved #and most of all the Doctor would love me too

[r0tt3ncandyc0re]

How can you call yourself a human after the things you did to me?

#trauma #trauma core #vent post #childhood memories #tw csa #actuallyabused #actuallytraumatized #tw child s3xual abus3 #tw csa implied #tw sa mention #tw sa #i was a child #how could you do this to me #you sick fuck #i hate you #i want to unalive myself #you disgust me

[hey-i-really-miss-you]

#i was a child #i was never a violent monster #i was just a little girl #it me

[philsmeatylegss]

Me like 99% of the time: “Lol, yeah, I was super suicidal and severely mentally ill when I was 13/14. I was so cringe. Glad I’m better and can make light of the topic. What a wreck lol”

Me that 1% of the time: …I was suicidal when I was 14

#never realized how fast I moved on #I went from being super sick and once I got better I just erased the past #everything that happened then was something cringe my middle school self did #MIDDLE SCHOOL #I WAS A CHILD #no child should ever be so sad they want to kill themself #I guess I’ve never given it thought #never mourned or reflected what I lost and what happened to me #I guess it’s just easier to completely separate that part of me than remember it #because it’s painful and hard to remember #I wasn’t a good person then I was in a lot of pain and I was so young #no one wants to think about that #but now I have such a huge disconnect between that time of my life and who I am now #I’ve completely made that part of my life a separate entity #and it’s literally been this past month or two that’s i realized this #I’ve spent the past three-ish years just making fun of myself at that time period because it’s easier than thinking about that part of #my life #it’s a chapter I don’t want in my story but keeping it out leaves this awkward blank space #I’ve never been good at receiving apologies or praised for doing something hard #and looking back and admitting that I was so sick so young and was able to get over it is something that’s fucking amazing and fucking #horrifying and I’m allowed to feel those things without pushing it away and making a joke about it #this is so random I meant for this to be a lol relatable post #delete later #rae’s rambles

[soldier-poet-king]

And so begins the weekend from helllll

Father? In a pissy mood? Me, stuck with him in a car all weekend with 0 other people as a buffer? ALSO I have to do a long stretch of highway driving. AND go to an event for bro 1 who I am very upset with for being an all around asshole and don't want to see or speak to him.

#franposting #literally i cant even just nap im fucking driving #i am goinf to *** #highkey actually being at work would be better than this #goodbye weekend. goodbye mental health. goodbye will to live #these mfs need to go to marriage therapy or get divorced. do one. please. i cant take this anymore #hes all like. oh no how do u think i feel #BITCH how do you think /i/ feel after more than a decade managing ur shitty ass moods #I WAS A CHILD #i cant even play mean angry driving music bc hes THERE #i have to play smthn kosher and pg and not clearly Unwell #actually. actually. sometimes i hate my parents more than anyone else on earth #i DONT forgive them. im sorry. its hard to forgive when they dont make the slightest effort to change

[seductiveandcynical]

Maybe you weren’t a terrible person, maybe you were just thirteen.

#heartache #fuck this #i’m angry #grief quotes #i wish you could see this #i wish you were here #im cryin #i’m sad #fuck my life #griefsucks #depressing poem #trauma #i was a child #i deserved better #hurtquotes #parenting

[hiddenst0rms]

You know you’re in the trenches when you’re searching so hard for sickfics that you’re in Fanfiction.net accounts from the 2000s with the bios looking like “Hi guys XD follow me on MySpace” 

#truly historical artifacts #showing my age a bit here #if I find a fic from say 2006 and the author is clearly in high school #I'm like #wow #I was a child #and yet I can still enjoy them to this day #I wonder how these authors are doing

[placetovent306]

"But they're still your parents 🥺"

Me when my parents breathe around me:

#child abuse #daddy issues #mommy issues #fuck you dad #fuck you mom #childhood trauma #i was a child #actually bpd #bpd #bpd thoughts #bpd problems #bpd vent #vent #bpd blog #bpd feels #bpd stuff #bpd meme #bpd life #bpd mood #bpd shit #bpd things #actually borderline #being borderline #borderline blog #borderline problems #borderline thoughts #living with borderline #borderline personality disorder #mentally unhealthy #mentally fucked

[deepceruleanblues]

#quote #trauma #pain #loss #childhood #abomination #abandonment #relationship #hurt #it hurts #i was a child #mental health #depression

[nonbinaryspacegoo]

you ever look back at something that upset you as a child, now with the clarity of an adult, and realise that now that youre older and wiser and can see things from the perspective of the adult who upset you at the time and realise...

it was fucking worse and you were right to be upset and actually youre way more angry now that you can look at the child you were from the perspective of an adult was meant to protect and nurture children

#trauma #mine #childhood trauma #debating making contact with some old teachers and making them explain to my face what the fuck they thought they were doing #i was a child #i was a fucking child #how fucking dare yoy

[summer-soul16]

Who else when you were a kid thought that bonfires weren’t a thing you do in summer because it’s hot weather and bonfires are for fall and winter when it’s cold

#I was weird #and didn’t have bonfires very much at all #summer #summer girl #summer in my blood #summertime #childhood #bonfire #winter #fall #autumn #as a kid #i was a weird kid #i was a child #obviously

[skeletorswaifu]

Sam and Frodo love each other SO MUCH

I WANT TO BREAK SOMETHING! I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS!

hold my drink I'm burning DOWN MY HOUSE WITH ALL THE LOVE

#i love them #i used to think frodo was so annoying #i was a child #but he did so good! he tried so hard! #those eyes!!! #sean astin and Elijah wood have impeccable chemistry #frodo baggins #samwise gamgee #lotr

[fairybonesandstardust]

💀 i’ve never written a warrior cats fic in my life but i have planned put a warrior cats rp?fic? in my head. yes one of them featured the cats that lived in my house at the time. thank the lord there was no shipping going on (i think)

#i personified pets and gave them new names 😭 #warrior cats #erin hunter warriors #thunderclan #fandom things #text post #humor #i was a child #fanfiction #ao3 #ao3 funny

[zekekaiju]

One time I had a dream were I found out that the Loch Ness monster was actually a nuclear submarine being tested by the Scottish government. They wanted my help finding it because I was really good at swimming and might have been able to breathe underwater I'm not sure. I said "no way" but they said that my girlfriend was on board when it went missing and I said " gosh darn it Christy" and agreed to help find it. So I swim down and find a secret cave in Loch Ness with the submarine and my girlfriend. Plot twist there is also a plesiosaur in Loch Ness but it has been mutated by the radiation and now has tentacles that it can shoot laser beams out of and telepathic abilities. It wants my help using the nuclear submarine to take over the world ( I am in very high demand in this dream). Christy is already helping it but she might have been mind controlled I don't fully remember, but obviously I refuse. So the Loch Ness monster shoots some tentacle beams at me. I managed to dodge them but they are super radioactive so they'll kill me anyways. At this point Christy disappears so I assume she got away, don't really know. Since I'm dying anyways I figure I better make sure the Loch Ness monster also dies. So I taunt the Loch Ness monster with the fact that it's nickname is Nessie but it is a boy monster and that's a girl's name. This drives the Loch Ness monster into a rage and it starts blasting at me. At the last second I jump out of the way and the laser hits the nuclear submarine and causes it to explode killing the Loch Ness monster and giving me super powers. I was super strong and super tough and could make energy tentacles and stuff. The dream pretty much ended there. Below is my artistic rendition of what the Loch Ness monster looked like in my dream

#dreams #loch ness monster #submarine #nuclear #nuclear submarine #mutant #monster #kaiju #artwork #one time i dreamt #of monsters and men #mutant monster #loch ness #scotland #gosh dang it #christy #plesiosaur #i was a child #7 years old #maybe