#i was dying inside. so scared | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ihaveitprintedout · 8 months

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when you're in a normal conversation and they bring up the F1 driver you're obsessed with and you have to pretend you only like them a normal amount and not a psychotic amount

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creekfiend · 10 days

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I think the very worst thing about being this sick and in being this much pain is just the bone deep exhaustion I feel

I want to connect with the world and it's like trying to touch the sky when you're lying at the bottom of a well. I can reach my arm all the way up as long as it will go and I can't touch anything I'm too far down and I can barely even see it from where I am and there's no way I can reach it at all

#and I'm so tired I'm so so tired I can barely feel the anger and the terror I'm so angry and I'm so scared and I'm so tired of being #like this #I want it to be a different way I want to be a whole person #and I don't even have the wherewithal to feel that I can feel it but I can't feel it all the way because I can't feel anything #I can't feel anything all the way there's something wrong with me there's something inside me that's just wrong #sick #i feel like maybe i am dying.

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dutybcrne · 28 days

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Imagine if the remaining Khaenri'ahns, due to the influence of the curse or affliction of Abyssal energy they've been exposed to are able to see like. Warped visions of their old comrades/people via the leylines or in domains from first glance, where it would take others direct exposure or even special abilities to even begin to see them-

#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//Kae as a kid seeing like. Spectres hanging around a domain and being creeped out #//Meanwhile bby!Luc is nonethewiser and happily tromping on over to pat the door of the domain to Prove he ain't scared of NOTHIN #//Kae trying not to scream and pull Luc away as he unknowingly makes the spectres part around him (bc his Vision) on his way #//Kae finally breaking through his terror and rushing forward to wrench Luc away when the spectres start acting weird and crowding him #//Cringing as he can almost feel them touching his head; whispering abt his role as Khaenri'ahs last hope while Luc yells at him #//Kae; older now; going to that same domain & being almost greeted by Them as he heads inside to investigate just What was going on there #//Getting a NASTY slew of Visions and torments bc he was WHOLLY unprepared for what they were tryna show him #//Dainsleif being Haunted by all the spectres in the Chasm; seeing shadowy figures everywhere he looks/walks #//Stalking him; whispering to him; calling his name; his title; begging for mercy; to be Saved; when he can scarcely do so for himself #//Bc that Abyssal device drained the HELL out of him; and with it amplifying the energy afflicting him; he can almost make out the faces #//Of each and every shadowy spectre coming at/near him. Can almost SEE the tormented faces of the Husks as they Challenge him #//Of HIS comrades; HIS people; hearing their dying; agonized screams through the agony of the Abyss's corruption #//The more affliction with Abyss energy; the clearer yet more Gruesome the images get #//As if it was always TEMPTATION in order to get the person to corrupt themselves more with it all along #//Baiting the person with things they can be intrigued by; be Desperate enough to seek out; feel GUILTY of and try to 'save them'#//Only to end up Ruined themselves when they fall far too deep into its clutches-#//Eh; idk where I was going with this lmao #//An attempt at horror plottings perhaps #//I do miss being able to fully; tho got a lil practice running Boo.thill hcs

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ducktollers · 8 months

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imma keep it real with u guys idk how im gonna stand the anxiety this semester . and i must stand it i have no choice

#grin and bear it. i am so TIRED of grinning and bearing it #actually im not grinning . im glaring to stop my eyes from watering or staring at my hands fidgeting while i bear it #university is just like. i dont belong here. i shouldnt be here. ur all so passionate abt this and i didnt even do the reading.#im too scared to make eye contact or talk . and then i get sad and insecure abt always being the odd one out. while i glare at the floor #every semester i say my name and lie and say sheher pronouns and it makes me taste bile. and i cant stop sweating. and i hate it here.#someone has to sit right next to me and suddenly my breath probably stinks. i probably stink. my skin looks so bad. my hair looks so bad.#and i stare at my lap and see my big ass thighs and im like Oh yeah im a woman. thanks i hate it. if i dont wear a binder i feel sick #if i do wear a binder i cant breathe and cant stop sweating #im tense all day. my whole body hurts. im too anxious to eat. i should bc my stomach will growl.if i eat my stomach will gurgle loud anyway.#i need to get out of here. im so close to the end. ive been dying inside for years. ive never been anything but a student. im terrified.#🙂#u know. its like that #x

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theskoomacat · 2 months

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my brain wrote such a fun little book of poetry by a beetle in today's dream, like damn. i didn't know i had it in me. the beetle itself was absolutely stellar too

#me and my dad somehow pissed off a god of some elf? ant? guys and were to obliterated by the god #some otherfsiry godmother-like entity showed up saying they can do nothing to help us #and looked at me like at an idiot as i blissfully read the small book of poetry and cradled the beetle #i would die happy #dream tag #real talk. i've recently become aware just how many of my dreams recently have me... unsettled in the dream #to the point of me willing to classify them as stress dreams despite me being annoyed and not scared in them #like. a milder example is me trying to show a homeless guy a very cheap but tasty diner but i kept missing the turn and getting us lost #just Annoying #then i dreamt i got stabbed in the stomach be a large object but my mom(?) applied stitches so it just annoyingly hurt on the inside #and i was sure i wasn't dying and i wasn't panicking at all but we couldn't get to the hospital for some reason #now this dream where i'm basically scheduled to die but i feel happy #it's like stress is threatening me with a larger and larger weapon every night but i just go Eh.

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jessahmewren · 9 months

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#I would like to report that my former psychiatrist has friended me on fb #I cant believe all those years of being totally honest and raw about how screwed up i am didnt scare her off #but oh well #here goes nothing #Jk i'm dying inside i love her so much

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lapelle-du-bubblegum-vide · 1 year

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Ok, so I just opened tumblr, not watched Tommy’s lore yet, and why is the dash on fire????? Why am I seeing people panicking and comforting each other????? I’m so scared????

#i genuinely am #I’ve been here for almost 2 years I have no means to watch the lore yet and omfg it’s like seeing people screaming and shouting #at something through the window but you don’t know what and why and everything inside is calm #I am so fucking scared of what I’m about to watch #and if someone read the tags I’d really appreciate an answer to this because oh christ am I dying right now #dream smp #c!tommyinnit finale #c!tommyinnit #calls from the void

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queen-scribbles · 1 year

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So fighting Hundred-Face last night went well. :)))))

#queen in mendev #ya know how in pillars of eternity pallegina was my ''OH FUCK i'm in trouble'' when she starts dying companion?#basically invincible and carried me through a lot of fights?#if she's dying we're probably gonna lose(damn lagufaeth >.>)?#yeah seelah and lann are that in wotr #so you can imagine how much internal screaming was happening when they BOTH hit orange😅#sosiel actually went down bc he kept failing the save against a spell effect and i couldn't get him to move out of its range #took three tries before woljif ACTUALLY turned off the one generator #and immediately after leaving blackwater i went and did weary guardian #where trinne had to 1v1 a lilitu for a couple minutes before everyone else caught up #most of her current spells are buffs/crowd control with a few damage things but the lilitu kept SAVING against those #so safe to say she and lann each scared the pants off each other inside a 24 hour period #just fun couple bonding things :)))

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cutemeat · 2 years

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i rlly truly feel like Dennis’ “bondage facility” 100% had a safeword (hint: its “spiderman”) but Dee was just deflecting with her whole ‘no no u dont get it… the fact that his prisoner cannot escape is Really what’s getting him off’ cuz thats how SHE is but she is in denial n cant admit she has those predatory behaviors lololol

#i just feel like the fact they wrote her saying ‘i know my brother better than anyone else’ indicates the subtext is that she uh.#really Doesnt anymore #thats whats funny to *me* at least so thats what inread into it LMAO #esp after their convo abt what the implication means in s11… the disconnect rlly happened there #anyway #dennis chose ‘spiderman’ as his safeword cuz hes a huge fucking dork n thought ‘oh haha.. spiderman cuz ‘with great power comes great #responsibility’ haha isnt that clever… tell me im clever. tell me im smart . please. (dying inside)’#imagine u book a dom n he just starts crying while explaining his safeword #Thats dennis #thats why no one ever got thru it cuz he couldnt even get them thru the instruction portion #im srry idk what im doing tonight but im having fun #maybe I’m just too far lost in the sauce but i just cant take him seriously or be scared when he had a Jurassic Park ref in that video #i just CANT ok #parker texts #rape mention tw #??#just in case

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be-good-to-bugs · 2 days

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UGH why does eating always make me feel like throwing up :/ that is the opposite of what i want

#the bin #i feel less bad todaynthan i usually do. i think. but physically my body feels terrible. i am also still super stressed and sad but. i dont #feel as utterly horrible as i usually do so thats good i guess. i wish i could turn it into something productive but thats fine #i mostly wishbthat i could being myslef to do something fun like watch something or whatever but my brain still says no #and i wishbi could draw but my brain says no to that too #well. i can probably actually afford some weed after all bc itll peobs mostky be gas i gotta pay for for thw trip so #idk when ill see my sister next but ill have to fully figure this out then. and i gotta measure the inside of her boyfriends car so i can #know how much i can pack. i can also probably afford to get the things i wanted for my siblings from here before i leave. maybe.#gas will be a lot but they still owe me $300 so that helps a lot. i should be able to afford the trip fine. im really sad i have to leave #most of my stuff though. i dont trust my sister with it. but i dont have a choice so whatever. ill just have to deal.#well. im glad i dont feel so empty and horrible now. i hope it lasts and i can do something with it. its probs bc i had a meltdown honestly #ive felt like maybe thats what ive been needing to feel better. things still suck but i feel marginally better #usually i try talking to my mom just to get an ounch of social interaction and also i can complain abt stuff to her and she doenst tell #anyone. she has issues but shes pretty good about my privacy i think because shes scared id stop talking ti her if she broke that trust #which is true. i would probably stop talking to her. that was originally the plan before she stopled being such a bad mom anyway so #but idk. i havnet talked to her since she asked if i was coming to the funeral and i said no. she wasnt mad at me or anything but i havent #talke to her about non dad dying related stuff in a bit so. i shouod tho. im moving and i need to find out when a good time for that is.#and make sure she knows around what time i had been planning. and i need to know if she got an update about some stuff too.#also helath insurance stuff. im assuming she didnt end up getting a chnace to add me yet considering what happned. shes been busy #but my tooth pain has gotten even worse this past week so id like to see a dentist in june if possible bc god this thing hurts so bad

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suncaptor · 2 months

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every time I speak to anyone I am convinced it is the last time I will. every day I expect a crisis to occur or am faced with an impending one. every time I use my body I expect it to hurt. every time I think I could look forward to something I know it won't happen. every time I try anything I know for a fact I'll fail. I am certain in my doom to such a carefully constructed extent, and so much of it is logical and realistic. I am hopelessly hopeful about obsessive determination to improve. But also hope is a disease I refuse to ever let in. maybe this is making my life worse. even if it's completely real.

#mage of doom hours✌️✌️#i keep trying to allow myself to feel grief and violation and anger to see if it could make me feel anything again #but honestly I think maybe it's the hope that's blocking me #and while a large large part of that is because of years if seeing how it always goes badly and i never should to protect myself #maybe a larger part is if i let myself hope I am scared I will hurt someone #but hope also just hurts me like nothing else.#i think about 2020. i was so funny. i keep trying and changing and planning and letting people somehow supposedly in #but there is a wall around everything and that's because i am terrified of hope beyond anything else #and it's like maybe i DO need to learn to not treat the hope i can't kill like some type of plague inside me #but how can I when every time I do it hurts me more than anything else? when I am smart enough to know better? when my brain knows better?#i just want to be able to care about fiction as much as I used to so I wouldn't need :////// i was so good at using that to shield me from #everything. i don't know if its spn fandom dying or the isolation i felt last year and loss or if its just #well i had to step back from letting sam thoughts live at every given second bc it was just so fucking triggering #not that that's the cure :/// but like whatever if I can find joy and life and a reason to live in anything lmao #incoherents

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upsetbitch666 · 2 months

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#i’m so jealous of cora it feels like it’s eating me from the inside out #like this fucking poison starting in my chest and spreading throughout my entire being #with your just absolutely fucking adoring boyfriend #over the fucking moon with excitement #talking about baby names #entering raffles winning diapers #planning a baby shower #buying a house #she’s only 20 and it’s so ugly and rotten of me to be this jealous of a 20 year old #but that also makes it worse #you have everything i wanted #you have fucking everything i wanted and i hate you for it #i don’t #i love her #but man sometimes when something happens like she just gleefully announces she’s having a boy i just. god i kinda hate her and that’s awful #man she had a pregnancy scare while i was pregnant and i told myself if she was i wouldn’t have an abortion #and she wasn’t but then a month later she sure fucking was #and then the other day when she casually said she wishes i didn’t have an abortion so we could raise our babies together #oh man that just fucking. absolutely shattered me.#i want my mom so bad. i want to wake up and have her dying be a bad dream and go upstairs and cry my eyes out to her #about how i had this awful dream that she died and i had the worst three years ever #and how happy i am she’s alive #and watch a fucking musical with her #i miss her so fucking much it literally feels like there is this ugly gaping fucking hole right in my chest that everyone can see #i am a 24 year old girl we aren’t meant to be without our moms #we aren’t meant to be without our moms at 21 or 22 or 23 either #it’s just fucking. not fair. why couldn’t the abusive one die sorry that’s harsh i know #how long do you think i can cry before i run out of grief #i think if i let myself i could cry forever

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sensitivegoblin · 3 months

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Vent

Tw: sa, sucide, self harm

#cutting while listening to depressing songs is the only thing that empties me out and makes me numb #poison from hazbin hotel is fucking me up rn #I'm Angel dust....I wanna put myself into harms way just to feel something or to feel nothing at all #I wish everything wasn't just in my head cus everyone looks at me and doesn't see a problem #but inside I'm fucking suffering #it's a long story but I was supposed to hang out with my sister then #then it turned into my freaking out about something an her telling me my life sucks #she's not mean at all but she doesn't realize she's talking from a completely different perspective #there's a line in the song '#my story's gonna end with me dying to your poison #I got so good at telling you what you wanna hear i disassociate I disappear #that is my life to a perfect T #I wish I was brave enough to kill myself cus I'm scared and sick mentally #I don't have anything to live for #my presence doesn't make anything better #another line is 'whats the worse part of this hell? I can only blame myself'#it's my fault that I traumatized myself by being on kink tumblr since before 8th grade #I knew it was wrong so I tried to do it in the right ways'#I was desperate for attention and I broke myself in the process #my family would be sad and devastated I believe that #but in the end it would be for the better #no one can help me because I'm the reason I'm broken #I'm absolute trash wtf is wrong with me no matter what I'm just fucking garbage #I should've never told anyone about my dream I wasn't SA'ed this is just another attempt at attention what the absolute fuck is wrong with m

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osaemu · 5 months

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GOJO SATORU: IT'S GONNA FEEL SO GOOD, I PROMISE!

.ೃ࿐ he's dreamt about fucking you for months, and now that you're finally in his sheets, he has no intent of letting you go—especially when he finds out that he's your first time. NSFW

contents: fem!reader. virgin!reader. kinda sorta subtle coercion, corruption kink, slight dubcon, fingering, p –> v, lots of praise!!, mentions of prior dirty dreams (about you).

author's note: had this stuck in my drafts for a while so uhhhh. yea enjoy. tagging @mymegumi bc i love selene ꨄ︎

"please, baby, it'll feel so good," satoru cooes, threading his fingers through your hair and pulling your face closer to his. "i promise i'll be gentle."

you shrug, scrunching up your nose at satoru hesitantly. "i don't know..."

your boyfriend presses his lips to yours briefly and smiles tenderly. satoru's soft eyes are fixed on you, only you as he widens them pleadingly. "i wanna teach you how to fuck. please, sweetheart, we can stop anytime. jus' wanna make you feel good, i promise!"

it's only partially a lie—yes, satoru certainly wants to teach you to fuck, but he's not entirely certain that he could just stop anytime. especially because he's well aware that fucking a virgin is such an addicting experience—satoru knows you're gonna be so tight that you'll just suck him in, and he isn't that confident that he'll be able to stop once he's started.

but whatever, that's a problem for later—for now, he's focused on persuading you to spread those legs for him and show him your pretty pussy.

you pause, considering his proposal. after a couple seconds, you nod hesitantly. "you promise you'll be gentle?" you ask meekly, averting your eyes.

satoru nods, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. "of course—now c'mon, let's get those clothes off of you, baby." and a couple agonizing minutes later, you're half naked underneath a shirtless satoru, and his fingers trace the inside of your thigh.

"so first, i'm gonna make you cum on my fingers, 'kay?" satoru informs you. "needa loosen you up so you can take my dick."

"o-okay," you whisper, swallowing nervously. "i'm a little scared," you admit, fiddling with the waistband of your lacy underwear. "will it hurt?"

after a moment, satoru nods in response. "at first it will. but then you're gonna feel so good, i promise."

"you promise?"

"i do."

satoru tugs down your panties and grins at the sight of your pussy, untouched and reserved just for him. he's dying to just fuck you then and there, rough and no prep, but he made a promise. and satoru has no intention of breaking it.

"ready?" he breathes, positioning his fingers just outside of your entrance. when you nod, he shakes his head. "i'm gonna need to hear it from you, baby. use your words."

"i'm r-ready," you confirm, inching your thighs farther apart for him.

"good girl."

then satoru slips his fingers inside, and you can't suppress the sudden moan that slips out of your lips. to you, it's embarrassing, but to satoru, it's music to his ears. he steadily pushes his fingers farther and farther into your tight cunt, and satoru can't help but marvel at the way you just suck him in.

"you're so fuckin' tight," satoru mumbles, eyes fixed on your pussy. "and so wet, too. i've barely even touched you, fuck."

it's agonizing, really—the sensation of having someone else's fingers inside of you is so new and so strange that you can almost ignore the pain (which is present but not as throbbing as you had feared). satoru makes sure to be as gentle as he can, which unfortunately isn't quite as gentle as you'd like—but it's not too rough for you to handle.

satoru starts widening his fingers in a scissor-like motion, stretching you farther apart to make room for his already rock-hard dick. you squirm around him and whine about how deep his fingers are, but satoru dismisses your complaints with a laugh. "c'mon, this is barely the beginning. if ya can't take this, how're you gonna take my dick?"

a couple minutes later, when satoru finally deems you loose enough, he pulls out his now-drenched fingers. looking you in the eye with a smug smile, he slips his fingers into his mouth and licks your slick off of them. "mm, you taste so good, pretty. lemme see if you feel as good as you taste, yeah?"

and that's how he convinces you to keep your thighs nice and spread wide open for him as he positions the head of his dick at your entrance, practically trembling from the effort it takes to not just pound into you. you're so compliant and perfect for satoru, and it takes every ounce of his willpower to resist the urge to push you up against the headboard and fuck you until you pass out.

but somehow, he manages to control himself. "alright, baby, this is gonna hurt," satoru warns, touching his reddening tip to your soaked pussy. "you ready?"

"y-yeah," you breathe, distantly noticing the way your hands start to tremble. satoru exhales softly and shakes his hair out of his eyes before gently pushing himself inside of you, and the first thought that enters your head is that he's ridiculously big—it feels like you're getting torn apart every second he goes in farther.

"satoruuu," you whine, starting to paw at his chest when he goes in farther, and it's too much, too fast, but he only grins down at you in response. "it hurts, ow... y're too—"

"uh uh, just shut your pretty mouth n' take it," satoru groans, shifting the angle of his hips and going in a little deeper. you cry out in pain, face scrunching up in an effort to numb the stinging sensation around your waist. satoru dips his head and kisses your forehead, murmuring praises on how well you're doing.

"it'll feel so good soon, i promise, baby," he insists, pressing his lips to the spot in between your eyes. "you're takin' me so good, fuck— agh, you're so damn tight, this one's gonna hurt like hell, but you can take it, yeah? my pretty princess, you'll do anythin' i say, won't ya..."

satoru doesn't give you a chance to respond before he says something about this being the last stretch, but his words don't really sink in until he's two more inches deep into you. his last thrust is so sudden and jarring that it makes you cry out his name, over and over and over until the pain evident on your face starts to turn into something that looks a lot like... pleasure?

a self-assured smile grows on satoru's flushed face when he sees the chance, and a thousand more words of praise fall from his lips. your vision's a little fuzzy in the corners, and your mind is all but gone—it's hard to focus on anything but the slowly fading pain.

satoru starts to move his hips back and forth, easing your loosening cunt into him and nodding at the way you slowly start to show signs of wanting more. your eyes brighten up a little and you seem more alert the longer satoru opens you up.

"startin' to feel good now?" he asks, smiling smugly when you nod your head. "yeah, told you so." the prominent blush on his face starts to creep down his neck, and when you reach up and tentatively touch his cheek, that's when he loses it.

it takes every drop of self-restraint in his body to not flip you over, face-down and ass-up and fuck your tight cunt the way he's dreamed about for months. satoru's imagined it for so long that it's practically a reality for him—the way you would whimper his name and claw at the sheets, the way you would cum all over him too many times to count, all of it. he's seen it a thousand times in his head, but having his fantasy so close and yet so far drives him insane.

but as you smile up at him, the almost unnoticeable tremble in your bottom lip assures him that this probably isn't the time. after all, you're not leaving him anytime soon, so he might as well train you first before even attempting any of that on your perfect, untouched body.

"what do i do now?" you ask, and the simplicity of the question is almost childish. especially when satoru almost laughs in response, soft blue eyes glinting with amusement.

"jus' lie there and stay pretty f'me. and keep your legs spread wiiide open," satoru cooes, shaking his hair out of his eyes only for it to fall right back in.

"yeah, you're doin' so good that i don't even buy that you were a virgin—or are you just naturally made for me, huh? maybe that's it, 'cause i swear on my life that i've never fucked a cunt this fuckin' pretty, heh."

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thesaurus · 6 months

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// finally reached self-awareness level where I acknowledge that I'm doing things* (*organizing things, ie deep cleaning my freezer, switching my closet to fall/winter for real and ACTUALLY being real about what I don't ever wear) to have some level of control over my life

// anyways my therapist (regarding the persistent texting efforts) told me, excitedly & kind of pleasantly surprised, "you're really trying!"

// "yes! thank you! for noticing!"

#what is persistence if not... contuing to do it but more scared?#continuuuing #also one of my MANY organizing/home stuff library books talks about having an intention for specific spaces #and that can be like “having someone over on short notice and not dying inside!” which I think mine is #for my whole (tiny) aptt #also being able to see all my clothes (which I love) so I can actually wear them all regularly

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screampied · 2 months

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can you do soft sukuna after an argument vegas for fluff pretty please i think we deserve it after all you've done to us

໒꒱ ₊˚ ‘ MAYBE I’M THE PROBLEM﹒⺡ SUKUNA RYŌMEN. ’

sum. gn! reader, angst with c-comfort, he’s a softie at heart, fluff, petnames, ty lucy for beta'ing <3

“what’s with you today?” sukuna furrows his eyebrows, and he lightly grabs your wrist. you face him only to briefly look away with a stubborn scowl. “you didn’t have to do that. i can take care of myself.”

he was referring to earlier…how careless you were, at least from his perspective. throwing yourself in danger just for sukuna. perhaps it was stupid, but at that particular moment—you didn’t have a thought that crossed your mind.

“well, i did,” you mumble, and sukuna bites his tongue from the inside of his cheek. his nostrils flare before he grabs your shoulders.

“what are you not getting? and if you died trying to protect me, then what?” and for a brief moment, it was dead silence. you stared at sukuna, and you can’t remember a time he looked like this. sukuna was … scared. the more you looked into his dark eyes, once full of arrogance and wit — instead, his pupils dilated and widened. his thumbs gently pressed into your skin, and then he continues to speak. “how can you even be calm about something like that?”

“i wouldn’t have to do things like that if you’d just be more careful,” you chastise, a sudden wave of gloom spraying over you. sukuna kept pausing every few seconds, as if he was carefully thinking of what to reply with.

sukuna’s almost got a glare before he sighs. “i told you. i can take care of myse—”

“no, you can’t sukuna. you know how many times you’ve almost died? the countless days where i’d be worried sick about you. if anyone’s reckless, it’s you. and you wonder why i act like this, it’s because i’m in love with you, you idiot.”

you don’t even register your words, it’s as if you’ve been yearning to get that out for ages.

sukuna grows mute, trying to figure if he actually heard what he’d just heard. you…you were in love with someone like him?

the awkward silence was deafening, a single tear strolls down your cheek before sukuna’s face suddenly softens.

he brings a thumb up to your cheek, swiping the tear aside before muttering in a raspy, “you love me?”

“i thought it was pretty obvious,” you grumble, avoiding his eye contact. your heart ached, never in your life have you felt this vulnerable. saying it out loud only made you flustered immensely quick. a soft smile goes against his lips — you didn’t answer his question, but he knew the answer. you loved sukuna. “but whatever.”

“oi. don’t ‘whatever’ me,” sukuna mutters, cupping both sides of your face. he has you stare right into his eyes, the eyes where most see a cruel villainous person, you see the softest eyes imaginable. reserved only for you. “look at me,” and you finally meet his gaze, a smug grin slowly tugs against the corners of his mouth. “you’re in love with me.”

a weird tingly feeling crept up inside your stomach, and you give sukuna a glare. “you know,” he keeps speaking, a soft finger stroking your cheek. “instead of almost dying for me, you could have been normal and just said, ‘i love you’.”

“…shut up,” you grouse, entirely abashed. he found it cute seeing you like this. in the midst of your mini tantrum - sukuna hums to himself, leaning down to kiss your forehead.

“hmpf. well, i suppose i love you too, brat,” he utters, watching your face briefly light up at his words. sukuna saying it back couldn’t have made your heart swoon even more, but it did. “and i’m sorry for being so careless.”

you felt butterflies collide inside your tummy before you blink, ears perking at his first initial words and you pout. “you suppose?”

sukuna looks down at you before he awkwardly pats your head. “i … love you,” his voice was a mere soft rasp. studying his stare, sukuna started to grow a tad bit embarrassed. even more than you. as his fingers softly roam through your hair, he leans up close to your face and scoffs. “happy now?”

“i love you more,” you smile, feeling more relieved. he’s taken aback once you hug him. sukuna’s always been so stiff at something as simple as a hug. your frame held his waist tightly, and he’d never admit it but it was adorable.

sukuna scowls. “…. you’re squishing me.”

“shut up and hug me back.” you sigh, only taking this as an opportunity to squeeze him tighter. he was so warm.

usually…sukuna wouldn’t let anyone get this close, yet alone do this. a simple affectionate hug.

he groans, slowly wrapping his arms around you. “you’re so annoying,” and as your head rests against his chest — you look up at him, a soft smile goes against your lips. “pain in my damn ass.”

“talking about your ass isn’t romantic, ‘kuna.” you raise your brows . . . obviously kidding, but he groans.

with an eye roll, sukuna does the unexpected and pulls you up close towards his face. with a perplexed grin, you watch as he grabs you into a chaste kiss. it takes you by surprise, your hands remain flat and still before you wrap your arms around him. sukuna’s soft with you, you made him soft—and he hated it, but a tiny part of him secretly loved it too.

abruptly, he pulls the kiss away before glaring at you. “i love you.”

“i love you too, kuku.”

“…..call me that again and see what happens.”

#★vegasbaby.#sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #ryomen sukuna x reader #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk fluff #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jjk drabbles #jjk fic #sukuna fluff

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