#i was given so much FOOD in this scene ALONE!!!!!!

[skrunksthatwunk]

ok so. kiwami 2. rooftop scene. the ending. it's a bit of a clusterfuck but i wanna talk about one detail, a problem they bring to your attention by Fucking. Talking About Her.

haruka is watching all of this unfold.

[this post is like 4.5k words long + pretty critical + has spoilers for kiwami and kiwami 2, and really minor/vague ones for a couple others. they're not that bad though, trust me (and i added a warning in the one place it is major)]

ALSO CONTENT WARNING i'm gonna talk about kiryu's passive suicidality a good amount in this one, so stay away from this if you think that might affect you negatively/you'd be better off skipping it. i'll also make a tl;dr (which i will highlight in red) at the very end if you really wanna know what my point is that will exclude those elements <3. i am also going to use a lot of choice-based language in regards to kiryu's contemplation of suicide because i think it's the lens through which the games treat the topic, but i personally don't find it a productive or realistic way to look at suicide or suicidal ideation at all. someone dying by suicide absolutely does not mean they don't care about their loved ones enough to fight on or whatever. i love you, and proceed with caution on this one.

(also i'm using the kiwamis as my point of reference because i uh. don't have a ps2? those are the games that i played, and though the differences are likely slight, i wanna be clear about that. also,, ignore the watermark on these screenshots,, i didn't notice them and i'm not retaking them. we're all gonna have to settle for youtube cutscene comps for now xoxo)

first, we have to talk about the ending of the first game.

[note: i am Really Really Confident kiryu has a conversation earlier in the game about his going to jail in nishiki's stead being him running away and choosing not to resist his two options (go to jail or let nishiki go to jail) and define his own path, fighting his way against fate to make it happen. part of why i'm so confident it exists is because it made such an impression on me at the time. it's pretty important to my interpretation of things but i also can't find it for the life of me, so uh. sorry ✌️ i really tried. this post's takes/analysis will be dependent on this scene existing, so keep that in mind. if anyone knows where to find the scene/screenshots of it, lmk and i'll add a follow-up with it]

kiwami stuff

so as she's dying, yumi tells haruka this:

that she may be dying (painfully, and right as she's getting everything she wanted), but she doesn't regret it, because at least she did something rather than running away from it all. that you shouldn't run away, ever.

shortly thereafter, when the police find kiryu and haruka, this exchange happens between him and date. here's the play by play:

date tells kiryu he can get him out of trouble with this, and that if he doesn't, he'll get life in prison; kiryu declines his help:

kiryu is so devastated (understandably) by the back to back losses of the three people closest to him that he resigns himself to life in prison, and the death-in-effect that would be. he would prefer to waste away rather than struggle through a life without them. prison was monotonous and isolating, but coming back after a decade was overwhelming, and coming back to everything being so warped and twisted, and then losing the corrupted scraps he had anyway, well. he wants to go back to sleep. he doesn't want to be in a world where everything's the same except he's on his own. better to return to safety, to die slowly in a hell he knows well than weather a new one where he has control and agency, and thus one where he has the ability to fail and to lose anything at any time. he explains to date that that loss is why he can accept his death:

date shakes him and asks him if there's really nothing left for him, no reason to keep living at all:

then echoes yumi's advice to haruka:

which makes an impression on kiryu:

date gives him a reason to live in the form of haruka, saying she'll be on her own again if he goes to jail. he hijacks kiryu's tragic protector complex to keep him alive, because she needs him, and because she's someone precious to him:

after the dust has cleared,

kiryu and date also have this exchange, where date tells him to stay away from the cops (and presumably arrest and a return to prison, the aforementioned fate akin to death), and kiryu cites haruka as his reason to stay away, one he holds to with no uncertainty (showing again that he's accepted date's logic, that his reason to keep living even when it's incredibly difficult is to care for the more vulnerable haruka). given the weight of the consequences, to me, it feels like date's telling him not to be alone with his thoughts or something. it's almost frightening:

so, what's our takeaway from kiwami?

kiryu lost everything and hit rock bottom, but he chose to fight, and to live life on his own terms, even when it got difficult. that's the narrative life lesson he had to learn to avoid repeating the events of 1995. he made that choice for haruka's sake. it's seen as growth.

and without him, haruka would've just returned to the orphanage (assuming she could make it back to sunflower at all) with no one who knew or understood what she had been through, no one to mourn with her, and no one to give her the attention, care, and protection she needs. kiryu knows what it's like to be an orphan with a limited parental figure who only checks in every so often (kazama, "aunt" yumi), and what someone will do for attention/affection from that person (via both himself and nishiki swearing up, climbing the ranks, etc. arguably haruka coming to kamurocho by herself to find "mizuki" is similar), and what it's like to lose them anyway (again, kazama, yumi). their situations parallel each others' somewhat, and that binds them further. and after losing everyone (which he blames himself for to some extent, as one can probably assume from this and 2, and something key to his arc in later games), he chooses to protect her. and this time, he won't fail. at least partially because failing would hurt him, too. he'd have nothing left again.

okay. now we get to kiwami 2.

if you forgot, the context is basically:

everybody's fighting on the roof of a building which i'm sure will not be a running theme or anything as the series goes on

there's a bomb that's about to go off and they don't know how to/can't defuse it

ryuji shot the twist villain to death, but took fatal hits to do so

sayama's like hey!! let's get out of here!!! and kiryu and ryuji are like nooo we have to settle this oughh it's punchin time and they stick her on an elevator and send her down so she doesn't have to watch

ryuji loses. sayama returns, they have a cute sibling heart to heart, and ryuji dies in her arms. sad

kiryu is in rough shape as well, and there's like 2 minutes left on the bomb's timer

here's the scene itself:

sayama tells kiryu they have to run, and kiryu says he can't. the gist is "let's run!" "you go without me" "i'm not leaving you!" "i'm in no condition to run" "i'll carry you then!!" sayama: *sees how fucked up kiryu is, realizes he's Going To Die Anyway* "ok, then i'm staying with you!" and then further bickering about that, before they give up and make out (as one does i guess)

date (he's here now) yells this at them from a helicopter:

before someone else in the helicopter tells date this:

we get this shot of haruka calling out to kiryu as the helicopter swerves away:

and kiryu and sayama have this exchange about haruka where they say they let her down, but that she'll understand:

then they hug and the bomb ticks to zero right when the credits hit. in post credits it's revealed that the twist villain defused the bomb when they weren't looking, betraying his co-villain for reasons i truthfully do not remember and am unwilling to look up. it's not about that right now.

so, how does this scene interact with the ending of the previous game?

the short answer is "badly <3" but here's the long answer:

it's about choices.

the thing about fiction is that anything you want to have happen, as a writer, can happen. it may not be effective, internally consistent, or logical, but you can write it regardless. audiences suspend their disbelief for the sake of engaging fully with your fiction, but everyone has a threshold past which they will stop being engaged in a story and either become uninvested or annoyed. writers usually have lines they're unwilling to cross as well. but in almost every story, there's at least a couple of places where they stretch reality a little to make the narrative they want happen. this is not a bad thing at all. that's how stories get told.

now, i'm gonna be real with you. i don't care about how feasible plots are like 95% of the time. it's not something i think about much, nor is it something i prioritize. i am a very character-centric media consumer, so if world building and/or plot are a bit stale or contrived, that doesn't really bother me much so long as i'm invested in the characters involved. some people can't stand plot holes or the ways musicals burst into song or whatever, and that's fine for them. but it's not something i tend to find that all that important.

this is all to say that i have a sorta affection for rgg's flavor of bullshit pulling. and it is a powerful flavor, maybe even an acquired taste, but i can and do rock with it so long as it doesn't damage the characters too much. this is why i'm not making a lengthy post howling into the void about joji kazama or the second joon-gi han or how many secret relatives there are. those things are silly and endearing and a clumsy yet heartfelt part of a series i care about very deeply. i'll joke about it, but i don't consider it much of a flaw. it's more like personality. flaws are texture, and they help a piece's identity. point is i am very, very willing and able to suspend my disbelief for these games in exchange for a good time, particularly via good characters.

(if you want another example of where i draw the line from within rgg, the answer's the YAKUZA 4 SPOILERS INCOMING rubber bullets twist, because i think 1) it's actively horrifically stupid (especially retconning a scene we SAW HAPPEN. WE SAW BLOOD ON EACH IMPACT, AND RUBBER BULLETS DON'T OFTEN BREAK SKIN THAT DEEPLY (THEIR DAMAGE IS MORE PERCUSSIVE THAN PENETRATIVE). THESE EVENTS HAPPEN IN THE SAME GAME YOU DON'T HAVE TO RETCON IT JUST REWRITE IT. OR DON'T SHOW THE HIT AT ALL SO THERE'S MORE PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY. DON'T DO THIS JUST TO HYPE UP YOUR SHITTY VILLAIN NO ONE CARES ABOUT. and 2) (a bit more importantly) i think it actively removes saejima's primary internal conflict for that game, that being his intense guilt over the 18 murders he thinks he committed, one i was invested and interested in. but this isn't a rubber bullets post.)

characters in this series walk off a lot of life threatening injuries. they survive miraculously, they escape in the nick of time, and they pull through in the end. kiryu still somehow hasn't killed anyone. almost every game in his saga ends with an "is kiryu gonna make it out this time?!?" shortly followed by a "yeah lol. lmao" postcredits reveal. kiryu fucking punches a marble statue into dust in the first game. having a story that asks you to suspend your disbelief so much and so often means that when a decision is made, it's not the writers saying, "well, this would have to happen so we are obligated/forced to write it happening" so much as "we wanted this to happen for some reason(s)," because you already know that they're not guided solely by logic. again, this is true of all writers, it's just amplified in stories like these because they've already given you so many hard mode suspension of disbelief moments (they've broken you in like leather, yeah? or like how obvious internet scams allow for self selection by being so obvious that only the most vulnerable people would fall for them. they curate an audience willing to play along with their bullshit flavor so they can tell a story that's more likely to satisfy that audience. in a good way, in a fun way! mass appeal is overrated). there is not much limit to what this series is willing to try and sell you.

so when ryuji takes lethal damage taking out the big bad, that's a choice. when he doesn't die immediately, that's a choice. when ryuji and kiryu send sayama away in the soon-to-be-forgotten elevator so they can settle this like men or whatever despite the literal actual bomb about to go off, that's a choice. when sayama comes back, that's a choice. when ryuji does die, that's a choice. when kiryu determines that he can't escape in time, that's a choice. when sayama is unwilling to leave him, that's a choice. when she says she'll carry him out and there's an elevator right fucking there and then she's like never mind i guess i won't anymore we're dying together right now kiryu like they're not gonna even try?? wouldn't distancing themselves from the blast give themselves a better shot, something that's super possible given the 2 minutes they have with that elevator??? sayama you met him like a week and a half ago why are you ready to die with him that's not a plot hole i just think that's kinda strange whatever anyway, that's a choice. when kiryu stops arguing with her so they can kiss (next to her brother's corpse), that's a choice. when date shows up, that's a choice. when the helicopter can't save them because the bomb was going to go off too soon, that's a choice. when they put haruka in that helicopter and take her away, let her only impact be reminding kiryu and sayama that they can't help her, that's a choice. when they spend their last moments talking as if they're already dead, then simply waiting, that's a choice.

they're all choices that the writers made for the characters, and we are asked to believe them for the sake of achieving the writers' vision, as with any story. the only problem is that the writers' vision here fucking blows.

i'm not saying it would be realistic for kiryu and sayama (and even ryuji) to make it out alive, but it wouldn't be out of character for the series in the slightest. kiryu is suddenly unable to power through here, and that's a choice. so, what is their vision?

put simply, i think they wanted a romantic last stand for kiryu and sayama, a tragic scene of doomed, devoted lovers. and i think they wanted an edge-of-your-seat fake out death. they wanted spectacle.

here's how some specific choices they made undermine all that shit we talked about earlier from the first game.

once again, kiryu is called by date to live, to pick himself up and keep going, no matter how impossible the odds are. he's even reminded by haruka's presence, his one anchor in keeping himself going. the growth he had in the parallel scene in the previous game is challenged, and he fails.

it's not enough this time. and that's a choice.

it's also one i can't think of a good reason for, and that's the real kicker.

characters can have developmental backslide just like people do, and if they're given good reason for it, it can be just as, if not far more compelling that purely linear growth (i am a chimera ant arc enjoyer, and that's all i'll say. sorry if you haven't seen hunter x hunter. uhh. i am also a zuko avatar enjoyer if that helps). but i can't think of anything that happened in that game that would cause this from a character perspective. if anything, kiryu should be less likely to do this intentionally. he's spent around a year raising haruka, and a year has passed since he lost his loved ones. at the very least, the pain should be more dull, though it is established through an early nightmare sequence that his ass is (justifiably) not over it yet. given that their deaths were the initial motivation for his willingness to rot forever, theoretically, he should be more motivated to stay alive than before now that he's got more investment and stability in his life outside of them, particularly when it comes to haruka, his reason for surviving. and if the ongoing nature of the trauma was the motivator for this, then they should've had it affect him more past that nightmare scene (it really serves more as a recap of the last game than anything else) so it didn't come out of nowhere. so the reminder of the lesson that saved his life and then guided it for at least a year afterwards, one that the whole resolution of the previous game relied on heavily falls flat for... some reason.

i think this is a good time to mention that, generally speaking, you don't write arbitrary choices into characters. sure, people in real life are often sporadic, but when analyzing fictional characters, every choice is filed into a portfolio of characterization that can and should be analyzed. going for pure realism can obfuscate their development, motivations, themes, etc. their choices and reactions may be unorthodox, but they must be internally consistent. this is very related to how i view plot contrivance as well. characters drive the plot, not the other way around. stories are about the ways characters affect their worlds/lives and vice versa, and they're the human face to the themes and ideas the writers are trying to explore and express. maybe my stance on this seems hypocritical. i don't know if it is. but to me, plot issues are usually a matter of engagement and investment, while character issues are a matter of substance.

i hope this doesn't feel patronizing explaining all of this, but i want you guys to know where i'm coming from in my analysis. starting at my base philosophy on writing is the easiest way to do that, i feel. defining the terms of the debate, and all that. anyway

and i mean, look. they survive because "it was defused the whole time we just didn't see it happen", so it's not like narrative tension or realism or whatever was THAT big of a priority overall. if it was gonna be a cop-out anyway, they should'nt have ruined kiryu's development too, yeah?. and sayama fucks off to america after this game anyway, so it's not like the doomed lovers thing had much payoff or meaning after this one (though you could argue that's more an issue with yakuza 3 than yk2, which has some merit to it). which means that they chose to sacrifice kiryu's prior development and internal logic for the sake of cheap tension for their finale that was both kinda illogical in and of itself (the elevator!! the elevator!!!) and a romantic climax that neither required nor really benefitted from this staging. (like. you coulda had them make out and then get saved by date, or kiss on the elevator in a "it's moving, but will we make it in time??" way or whatever. look i'm not saying those are great options either but they're SOMETHING okay. it would remove/reduce the amount of time wasted on characters sitting around with their thumbs up their asses for no reason in this finale).

instead the message of this finale is that, actually, sometimes it is impossible to change your circumstances and fight for your own way out of an awful situation. and what should you do about this unfortunate truth? uh. die! i guess. it's the exact opposite of the encouraging, optimistic message of the last game. zetsubou chou pride my ass.

note: i feel i should mention that when suicidality is brought up within the series (particularly in substories), it is always something someone has to overcome themselves through wanting it badly enough. they simply need the inspiration and the motivation to keep going. it's arguably treated as a moral obligation. frankly, the series is broadly very meritocratic (<- bad) when it comes to this topic (and others, but that's a Whole Other Thing. see akiyama's weird loan shark tests as well). sheer will and resolve is enough to conquer any problem, be it physical or mental/emotional, and it's irresponsible to act/feel otherwise. this is the logic the games operating under, and kiryu is often the mouthpiece for this bootstrap-pulling "tough love" sentiment. so when kiryu "chooses" to die, yet faces no emotional fallout from date, haruka, or anyone else, it feels very out of place. it's not just an odd choice; it's specifically, once again, an odd choice to make in context of the game/series/character it appears in.

kiryu's just like eh, haruka'll watch her only family die right as she gets some sense of tentative stability and lets her guard down after a devastating month the year prior (and a relatively dismal upbringing before that) that we trauma bonded over. sure, she likely came to view me as the one who would stay no matter what, who was too strong to be taken out, who she could always rely on, and so i know that dying would hurt her immensely, but she's smart enough to know it'd happen eventually. her eventual recovery means it's okay for me to do this (somehow, in a way it wasn't in the first game). it's an excuse within the narrative's logic, and one it is uncritical of simply because it's kiryu. he gets a pass.

and i think with the previously mentioned passive suicidality and general series-long mental health issues kiryu displays (i mean. yakuza 5's literally his depression arc), this could be retroactively seen as an interesting choice, like a piece in that particular narrative. i don't even dislike that viewing, especially in terms of fan approach. but (assuming this went down the same in yakuza 2), they likely didn't have that in mind. all they had then was the first game and the movie. and they took the first game's Entire Message and contradicted it for nothing but a scene they wanted to have happen because it'd be suspenseful and/or emotional (without actually doing the work to earn it). and they're not fans trying to analyze his character, they're the ones making choices for him. and they chose to massacre my boy. and if the subject of kiryu's mental health was a priority of theirs, why didn't they explore that? haruka and date's feelings on him not resisting and their words not being enough (whether that blame is justified by the narrative or not (it shouldn't be btw)), the uncomfortable drifting that resigning yourself to death and living afterwards anyway often brings, literally any conversation about it besides the minimal shit we get post credits of date being like "did you know about the bomb not having a fuse?" which like. bad answer either way (which is why they weren't straightforward about it, the cowards). you can't just be like "oh uh. idk he just gave up this time. yeah he was gonna die on purpose for some reason. good thing the bomb was fake lol" and then pack up and go home!! that's stupid!! any merit the idea of kiryu dying by suicide in this scene and in this way could have had from a character-based perspective loses its weight because 1. it didn't happen (for kinda stupid reasons), which makes it fall flat and 2. no one is really affected by the fact that it almost did, including him. they sacrificed his ass and replaced it with nothing, even when there could have been interesting outcomes to it.

so the narrative effectively chose to kill him by making the situation impossible, and this impossibility is ultimately arbitrary, given the series' usual approach to miraculous, illogical escapes. that, or the choice to stay was up to kiryu and sayama, one that 1. doesn't make sense and is actively regressive in context of kiryu's arc in the only other game in the series (as well as his whole saga in retrospect) and 2. one that contradicts how the series sees/treats resignation to death/death by suicide in all other contexts without being addressed, challenged, or condemned in ways it would in all other contexts. because they don't want you to think about it like that. they want you to think he (and the narrative) had no choice, that it made sense to do that. but it didn't. it doesn't.

and look, honestly? if i was bleeding out and had like 2 minutes to live, there's a non zero chance i'd say fuck it and kiss a girl too. i get it. but i am (and this is crucial) not a fucking yakuza character. and i'm certainly not kiryu kazuma.

tl;dr (basically just rephrasing the second to last main paragraph)

there are not sufficient character reasons for kiryu and sayama not trying to escape. additionally, because the narrative regularly facilitates even less likely escapes, it's not so constrained to logic and reality that it couldn't pull this one off. the choice to let their situation be impossible this one time was a cheap and arbitrary way of forcing a scene they thought would be cool and dramatic, and in doing so they chose to cannibalize a key emotional note of the previous finale (namely kiryu's mission to dedicate his life to protecting haruka) for hollow last minute stakes-upping in this one. it is then completely disregarded anyway. god damn.

#got so into this post that i used tumblr on my laptop for the first time to surpass mobile's image limit #i also added transcriptions in the alt text (which i should do more often) #actually thinking about it in the movie kiryu teaches haruka that lesson about stumbling on.. and she's the one to ask to follow him... hm. #just interesting given that the movie came out before 2. i don't think it makes much of a difference to the post it's just neat to me #one of my favorite parts of writing this was skimming through a bunch of yk1/yk2 cutscenes and noticing how often kiryu pats haruka's head #it happens a lot more than i remembered and it's very sweet to me. get bonked little one <3 #another good thing was realizing you can edit tags when you're not on mobile.... fucking life changing. i have lost hours to mobile tag #editing and i'm not even kidding about that #speaking of editing this one took like 6 hours.. my brother used “yakuza autism” (verb) for me earlier and it's so true. source: this post #i did have a short break to get food bc i hadn't eaten all day but that's mostly because i woke up at 3pm. anyway #also if you like kiwami 2's ending you're not even remotely alone. i looked at the comment sections of the scene comps and ppl love it #and more power to you!! i like it when people enjoy things. and tbh i DO have feelings that i'm supposed to about that ending #i just also have feelings you're not supposed to. like. anger. i guess. #rgg #ryu ga gotoku #skrunk meta #aww yeah it's a new tag babeyy #yakuza kiwami 2 #kiwami 2 #yakuza #like a dragon #yk2 #kiryu kazuma #sawamura haruka #sayama kaoru #maybe my thoughts'll change after replaying the games...? it's been like a year and a half since i beat yk2 so i am a bit fuzzy on it #yakuza kiwami spoilers #yakuza kiwami 2 spoilers

[etheries1015]

We share the love language of biting. Now imagine TWST beatsfolk has that as an actual sign of courting. Like you're chilling with Leona, not dating or wooing him, and then you bite his cheek in affection. And all of Savanaclaw is shocked because among them, it's the same as i.e. proposing marriage. The utter chaos XD

OHH MY GOSSSHHH YOUR BRAIN >>> I LITERALLY LOVE THIS SO MUCH??? HAHAHA SODEFHSELKJD i'm gonna expand on that for a few characters...

Accidentally courting them

General warnings: Gender-neutral reader, not really proof read lol. Obvious Malleus and Lilia favoritism <3 I also decided that they ARE dating in this scenario, I think its cuter that way in my head heuheu

Featuring: Leona, Ruggie, Jack, Malleus, Lilia, ... and Rook HAHA.

TW: none! Just a bunch o' fluff of biting your non-human lover without realizing it was a sign of courtship <3

Leona

It was a typical day for Leona. You two were sitting in the lounge where most of the other students lingered, Leona becoming rather... possessive as of late. Instead of resting in his bedroom away from prying eyes as you had requested from your lover, he ignored all your feeble cries requesting privacy. Instead, he holds you in his lap without worrying what others are thinking. A form of showing others you were his, and his alone. You were conflicted in your feelings, staring at him. His eyes were closed, but he could feel your gaze burning into his head.

"How long are you-" Then it happened. You gave in. You gave his cheek a bit of a nibble. All of the sudden the chattering stopped, all eyes were on you, before they start patting Leonas back and giving him congrats while a few seemed to pull presents right out of their asses.

"Wha- what's going on?" Leona grumbled with a light blush before growling and pushing the face of someone who tried to hand him another gift.

"You all look like idiots! You know biting means something different to us. Don't be dumb." Okay, now you were extra confused. Seeing your utter ignorance, Leona sighed.

"Biting in our land is a sign of courtship, herbivore." ...Oh. You blush deeply and hide your face in his chest, Leona looking away flustered and ruffling your hair.

"Try again in a few years, and I just might bite you back."

Ruggie

You were walking down the halls with your boyfriend when suddenly you had the urge to just...bite him. an overwhelming sense of love and affection for the fact he had given you some of the bread he (probably legally) got ahold of. You smiled fondly at the bread and back at Ruggie before placing your mouth on the bulb of his shoulder, causing him to yelp in suprise and dropping his half of the bread.

"wha- huh?! What was that for?" He became flustered, bending over to pick up his bread and slowly move away from you with bright red cheeks. You furrowed your eyebrows and hugged yourself, almost embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, I just...I dunno," Your cryptic and non specific response left him with his jaw open and eyes wide, spluttering out things like "We're still in school! I don't have the funds yet-" before a familiar fist came and knocked the back of Ruggies head. Leona stood there smiling in amusement and chuckling at you.

"I don't think they know what that means to us beastman, Ruggie." Even more confused then before, you asked for clarification.

"You just asked him to marry you with that bite of yours, herbivore." Now YOUR mouth was wide open, and Ruggie managed to get flee from the scene without much notice from you nor his senior.

Oh brother. You have a lot of communicating to do with that one.

Jack

You were sitting at the lunch table eating away at your food when you noticed...Jack's biceps. You marveled at the sight of his bulky arms- it's a wonder to you how he managed to become so strong and have the motivation to train all day. With a burst of admiration, instead of biting into your sandwich - you took a bite into his muscle. He yelped in suprise and just stared at you, face slowly turning red. Ace and Deuce laughed at his reaction, ready to ask you what was up before Jack took it upon himself to... well, flustered and rapidly spit-firing plans.

"W-we are still so young! Are you sure about this? I-i never knew our relationship was at this level!" He grabbed both of your hands and looked you in your (bewildered) eyes.

"If you're serious about this, I promise I will protect and love you for the rest of my life. But before we go ahead with the ceremony, I want you to meet my parents and get their blessings. Oh, and I need to get a stable job after we finish school first, too, so I can support you and our future. know we haven't talked about marriage before but-" You quickly cut him off in astonishment before crying out,

"MARRIAGE?! Jack, WHAT are you talking about?! I am absolutely not ready for marriage! What got into you?!"

...Queue Ruggie and Leona hysterically laughing at your utter confusion, reveling in the ignorance of it all for a few moments longer before explaining properly what you had just committed yourself unknowingly to.

Malleus

You were laying in the bed of Malleus Draconias's dorm, scrolling on your phone whilst his tail wrapped around your waist as he sat next to you reading a book. You sighed lightly and leaned your head back against the board of the mattress, turning slightly to look at your handsome fae lover. Your eyes then went down to his pale and perfect skin of his neck, the way it was free from all blemishes, smooth, and bright. Something about it made you want to taint it a light shade of red... He felt you shuffle slightly to adjust your body to be in just the right position where his neck was in full view. He glanced over to you feeling you wriggle free from his tails grasp, tilting his head seeing the look in your eyes crazed as you leaned over and just...chomped down on his collarbone.

You felt his tail twitch and his hands quickly throw the book he was reading aside to grasp your wrists, turning your body around and pinning you to the bed and carrassing your cheek with his tail.

"Biting..." He murmured, "Does this mean the same to humans as it does to Fae? You wish to be wed?" Your jaw dropped and cheeks took on a rosey hue, stuttering over yourself.

"W-wed?! I mean, I like to bite when I feel affectionate b-but marriage...I mean maybe one day b-but-"

"Biting in Fae culture is a sign of courtship and ownership. How brazen of you to mark me," he chuckled, "I shall take it you wish to own the next king of Briar Valley?" You could tell at this point Malleus was teasing you, something he picked up from the time you two have been dating.

Malleus could not help but return the favor by riddling your body with his own bite marks. Although he understood you perhaps did not have the intention of marrying him with your silly little form of affection, he knew in his mind with every bite that he was very serious about your future with him.

Lilia

Lilia already knew that biting in the human world did not mean marriage, yet was akin to something more of "cute aggression." So when you have the habit of biting him in the privacy of yours or his room, he knows you simply meant it as a form of affection, letting him know that you had an overwhelming sense of love for the old fae. He bit you back consistently on many occasions, it just seemed to be the perfect form of showing love for one another.

You didn't actually know it meant something much deeper, until you were in the diasomnia lounge and unable to control yourself as you grabbed Lilias hand and bit down gently on his wrist. You couldn't help it, he was being so entirely silly and loving towards you, that you couldn't help but show this public display of affection. Much to everyone else's dismay, however. Sebek stares at you with his mouth agape, sounds of disbelief escaping past his lips yet a sentence unable to form. Malleus as well seemed surprised at this.

"(y/n)," Malleus said, "You wish to marry Lilia?" You coughed at the sudden question and let out a feeble and awkward chuckle.

"I mean...I wouldn't mind one day, of course. We haven't really talked about it. Why the sudden question?"

"HOW DARE YOU," Sebek cried out after finally finding his words, "How dare you bite Lilia and be so insolent as to not move forward with your actions in dignity! YOU MUST TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR PROPOSAL-" Lilia started snickering, cutting Sebek off with a wave of his hand.

"It's quite alright, Sebek. Biting means something much different to humans than Fae, I suppose this is the first you had seen us put on a show of affection, hence your confusion." He turned to you, who had furrowed eyebrows and pursed lips at Sebeks sudden outburst.

"Biting, my dear, is a form of courtship to us fae. It is a sign of ownership," He chuckled.

"Why didn't you tell me that?!" You exasperated, "I mean, it wouldn't have changed anything I have done, but I would have been more careful about it... especially if it means something more to you," Lilia gracefully explained he understood it meant something slightly different to humans, before gently grabbing your hand and raising it to his mouth.

"Well, now that you understand what it means," He put your ring finger into his mouth and took a bite at the base,

"Would you like to bite me once more, my dear?"

Bonus:

Rook

You bit his arm and he immediately was on one knee.

"Was that a proposal? You know mon cheri, biting one affectionately is often a declaration of courtship-" You hit the top of his head and walked away from your interesting boyfriend.

"You're not a beastman or a fae! I'm never biting you again!" Your face red and folding your arms, turning away (ah, his cute tsundere lover.)

Oh woe is Rook! He begs and begs you to bite him more, he wants to be covered in your marks. It means you were claiming him as your own, right? RIGHT??

~~~

This was so fun to write DFSEFDSFIHSLDKJF thank you for the brain rot heuheuheueheueh

Masterlist

#Twisted wonderland #Twst #Twisted wonderland x reader #Lilia vanrouge #lilia x reader #Malleus #Malleus draconia #Malleus x reader #rook x reader #rook hunt #Leona kingscholar #leona x reader #twst fanfictions #ruggie x reader #Jack howl #Jack howl x reader #Twisted wonderland fanfictions #twst fanfics #twst x reader

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

The Princess & The Playboy (Part 1)

Summary: After one of the reader's last concerts of the year, she unexpectedly runs into notorious playboy Dean Winchester, quarterback of the LA Wolves. Only Dean's a big fan and he seems to want more than just a photo if given the chance...

Masterlist

Pairing: NFL Quarterback!Dean x Pop Star!reader

Word Count: 4,400ish

Warnings: language, family trauma/angst, kidnapping

A/N: I promise there'll be more Dean and reader interacting in person next part! Needed to set the scene with this!

_________

You groaned the second you were alone. You’d survived the summer tour but you were exhausted. All you wanted was a greasy hamburger, chicken nuggets, and to sleep for a month. After changing into a pair of joggers and oversized hoodie, you texted your bodyguard Eric, telling him you wanted to get out of there quietly. He knocked twice on your dressing room door before entering with a smile.

“Great show tonight,” he said. You rolled your eyes, Eric grabbing your backpack for you. 

“Like you pay attention to anything besides harassing the security team,” you said, resting your forehead against his strong chest. “I never want to tour again. I’m so tired.”

“You’re just cranky cause you’re hungry and need sleep,” he said rubbing your back. “You only have two more shows this year and then we can sit on the couch eating cookies and binging divorce court.”

“This is why I keep you around, buddy,” you laughed, taking a deep breathe before looking up. “Speaking of food-“

“Let’s get you out of here and full of some chicken nuggies.”

“Back in five,” you said to Eric thirty minutes later, your wallet in hand and panic button in your pocket. He let you go out without it sometimes but not after a show and especially not when you were in the press so much lately. 

It was nearly midnight as you walked into the nearly empty McDonald’s, a guy in a hoodie at the counter with his back to you. 

“Hi,” you said, stepping up to the other register. “Can I get a quarter pounder with cheese, a medium fry and a twenty piece chicken nugget with barbecue sauce? Oh and a bottle of water.”

You paid, the girl behind the counter staring at you like she recognized you but was too nervous to say anything.

“Holy shit,” said a male voice. You glanced left, the man in the hoodie pushing it down to reveal him in a black baseball cap. He was incredibly handsome and had such pretty green eyes. Something seemed vaguely familiar about him but you couldn’t place it. “You’re Y/N Y/L/N…and apparently you eat like a linebacker.”

“Dance on stage for three hours every night and you would too,” you said, the man humming.

“Do you mind if I get a pic?” he asked. 

“Sure,” you said, the man handing his phone to the girl behind the counter who eagerly took a few. He was practically giddy when he got his phone back, a bag of food coming out for him.

“Thanks for indulging me,” he said. You noticed a few strands of confetti on top of his hat and smiled. He must have been at the concert. He almost walked away and out the door when he spun around, parting his lips. “Can I give you my number?”

“Sure,” you said again. It was much safer to just take the number and hand it off to Eric to do a background check on the person than try a rejection. The man scribbled it down on the back of your receipt, your cashier now acting as his wing woman and making sure he had a pen.

“I uh, hope to hear from you soon,” he said, flashing you a wink before leaving. You eased when he was gone, the girl at the counter handing you your bag of food after a moment. 

“He’s so hot, isn’t he?” she said, your eyebrows raising. Not the reaction you were expecting from her.

“Mhm. Thanks for the food. Have a good night,” you said, quickly leaving. You ducked outside, Eric waiting in the backseat for you. 

“Any trouble?” he asked, nodding to the man farther down the parking lot, slipping into a large SUV.

“Just a fan,” you said, handing him the paper with the guys number. He gave you a side eye as he took it from your fingers. “He was harmless.”

“I’ll check it out to be sure,” he grumbled, stealing a fry from your bag. “Did you get me-“

“Yes I got you your nuggets,” you said, Eric relaxing back into his seat. Your driver headed for home and in twenty minutes you were on your couch chowing down. Eric was at the kitchen counter, lazily scrolling through his phone, probably grateful that you were secure in the house for the night.

You watch his eyes go wide, gaze shooting to you.

“I swear I didn’t do anything.” You kept eating your burger, Eric silently watching you. “Dude, you’re freaking me out.”

“That fan from McDonald’s posted the pic of you,” he said. You rolled your eyes and got up, sulking over to him.

“Oh tell me he’s not some whack job.”

“He’s Dean Winchester,” he said, showing his phone to you. You shrugged, walking back to the couch. “Dean Winchester? NFL quarterback? Three time Super Bowl winner?”

You stared at him, Eric groaning. 

“He’s the quarterback for the LA Wolves…he went to Kansas State the same time you did, Y/N. You probably went to his football games.” He rolled his eyes at you. “How do you not realize you’re taking a picture with a sports legend?”

“I must have missed it with all my free time over the past dozen years with all the touring and ten albums and other shit in my life. And frankly you’re the one that told me it doesn’t matter who it is, I need to be careful of everyone, whether they’re famous or not.” He sighed, putting his phone away.

“Alright, I get your point,” he said, returning to eating. “Dude’s kind of a player anyways it seems like. Nice guy but I know you’re more the sensitive guy type.”

“Emotionally available,” you corrected, plopping down on the couch once more. “Why would you think he’s into me anyways? Plenty of people are fans without wanting to get in my pants.”

“Well, it’s Dean Winchester so he definitely wants in your pants,” he joked. “Also the caption, genius.” 

You quirked your eyebrow, Eric tossing his phone over to you. You pouted when you went back to the post, actually reading it this time.

DWinchester67 Y/N Y/L/N Saturday Night Concert at the Wolves stadium. AMAZING TIME with the crew. Worth getting ragged on by the boys all week for taking them to the show just to see them belt their hearts out to #FinishLine (video soon)

Then had the awesome luck to snag a pic with Y/N grabbing a midnight snack. I was dying on the inside at meeting my crush. Sorry for being awkward when you were trying to get your grub on. Next time it’s on me ;)

Your eyes met Eric’s when you finished, his chicken nuggets nearly gone. 

“Yeah, like no reason he’s into you, right?” smirked Eric. You grumbled, returning to your late night dinner. “I’ll background check that number in the morning.”

“He’s a player that wants to have sex. Don’t bother with the background work. He’s harmless.”

“As you wish, princess,” he said with a little bow, earning himself being hit in the face with your balled up burger wrapper. “The abuse I put up with. Tsk tsk.”

“Yeah, yeah. Tell that to your generous benefits package,” you said, Eric chuckling as he double checked the back doors were locked one last time. “Eric…”

“Mhm,” he hummed, ruffling your head gently as he walked past the back of the couch. “See you in the morning, kiddo.”

“Night. Oh!” you said, sitting up on your knees on the couch, Eric throwing his head back. “It’s nothing bad! Just…can you ban everyone from the house until ten? I really want to sleep in and try to catch up.”

“You want me to fend off your team? After Dean Winchester posted that? What do I get out of this?” he teased, crossing his arms. You batted your eyes, jutting out your lip. “You got to do better than that.”

“I’ll buy you box seats to an LA Wolves game of your choice?” He looked blank faced which meant he was really tempted to take the offer. But Eric didn’t like extravagant gifts from you for doing his job. He already said his paycheck was more than enough and he barely accepted the Christmas and birthday presents you’d get for him.

You held up a finger, Eric calculating the move.

“Give me one good reason for not accepting.”

“First off, it’s too much. Second, I’m your primary protection agent and need to be available-”

“Please Eric? They’re going to be vultures in the morning with that whole post and you haven’t had a day off in six months. You’re as exhausted as I am. I’m asking as your friend, not your boss.” He grumbled, shaking his head. “Is that a yes?”

“It means I’ll think about it and I’ll see you in the morning,” he said. “We’re going to watch football all day. I’ll teach you all about it.”

You growled, Eric snickering the whole way out.

Dean POV

The first game of the season was always a good one. The team was healthy. We had home field advantage for once. 

And I really enjoyed the hell out of playing football in a packed stadium. It wasn’t an ego thing like for some people. No, I loved putting on a show and entertaining people for a few hours a week, give them a fun escape before they had to return to the reality of their lives.

That’s what football had always been to me and I knew for most fans, it gave them that same sense of belonging.

And women tended to really like seeing a bunch of muscular men run around in tight pants.

“Winchester, surprised you’re here,” said Michael. I glanced over my shoulder in the locker room, a big smirk on his face. “I thought you’d be in the burn unit with how hard you crashed and burned with Y/N Y/L/N last night.”

I rolled my eyes at the taunts of the room, ignoring them as they riffed on me for a good ten minutes. When Benny walked in though they finally calmed down, Ben taking a seat in his cubby beside me.

“Let me have it,” I sighed. Benny leaned in close, covering his mouth from the rest of the room.

“If you really want that girl to go out with you, you got to do more than make an insta post. She’s classy. She’s not going to fawn over you like every dipshit you’ve dated because you’re good looking. So you better impress her.” He gave me one last look before reaching down to his duffel and pulling out his cleats.

He had a point. Y/N had never cared for cocky flirts. I could remember her in college, always spending time at parties with the shy academic guys that chatted her ear off about music theory and english papers. I swear the only time she gave a single jock attention was when she’d grab a guitar in the late hours of the night and sing a song none of us had heard before. She could stop a group of drunken college students in their tracks with a single note. Nowadays her music was all pop but back then, just her and a guitar…I’d have sworn an angel fell out of the sky straight in front of me.

No woman had made my heart swell up with comfort and longing the way she had the night I laid eyes on her for the first time. 

The years had done little to diminish a teenage boy’s crush. If anything, seeing her last night, getting to talk to her for even a brief moment, made my insides burn hotter than before. Maybe it was only a crush, an infatuation with a beautiful woman with an even more beautiful voice.

I felt Benny’s stare on me as I lazily watched my feet before me.

“You’re still in love with her.” He said it as a statement so I didn’t respond. I’d never claimed such a thing despite Benny insisting on it back in college. But he’d always been good at sensing those kinds of things.

Or at least he wasn’t afraid to say it out loud.

“I talked to her in english lit once, about you.” My head snapped up, eyes wide as he was now down to his boxer briefs, tugging up his pants. “She heard what happened to Sam.”

“Why are you bringing up Sam?” I whispered, giving him a hard glare. Benny smiled, curious since he knew not to bring him up unless I did. “Half the school offered their condolences. Of course she-”

“She didn’t. She offered…hope. Apparently her little brother went missing once too.” I turned my head away. 

“Everyone who knows anything about Y/N Y/L/N heard that story. Congrats. We both have little brothers that were kidnapped and never heard from again. Fucking awesome we can share that trauma,” I spit out. Benny leaned in close, gripping my shoulder.

“She wrote a song for her brother. Finish Line. She showed it to me long before she got famous. Look up who it’s fucking dedicated to and maybe realize there is a deeper reason why you fell in love at first sight with that girl. I have a feeling she’s the only girl in the world that could get you and you knew it long before your head did.”

I was seething, storming out of the locker room and into a trainers room next door, quickly shutting the door behind me. What the fuck was Benny thinking bringing Sam up right before a game? I could handle thinking about a girl but Sam?

I angrily typed Finish Line dedication into google, freezing at the short paragraph that appeared as the top result.

Chart topper Finish Line by Y/N Y/L/N was notoriously written by Y/L/N in her senior year of highschool after the disappearance of her younger brother, Max. Max is presumed to have been abducted while walking home from a friends house. The music video of Finish Line states the song is “For Max & Sam” although Y/L/N has never stated who Sam is. Fans theorize “Sam” is a representation of all abduction victims however…

I immediately tapped on the youtube video of the song, scrolling all the way to the end, bottom lip wobbling as I read the stark white letters against the black background.

She never gave me the time of day back then yet she knew who I was, what it felt like to have a piece of you go missing and you couldn’t do anything about it. She put my baby brother in a song for her baby brother and we weren’t even friends.

I swallowed thickly, forcing myself to calm down. 

“Sammy,” I whispered, closing my eyes. “Is this a sign or something? Is she as fucked up as I am and the world doesn’t know it? Is that why she’s never been seen with a boyfriend her whole career? Did she shy away from connections when I buried myself in meaningless ones? Are we both so screwed up on the biggest stage in the world and that’s why I still feel breathless when I see her? Tell me I’m not crazy, Sammy. Tell me there’s a reason I’m still head over heels for this girl.”

I slowly opened my eyelids, staring at coach who was staring back at me on the other side of the room by the far entrance. I quickly cleared my throat and turned to leave, coach’s whistle stopping me in my tracks.

“I don’t know who the hell you’re talking about son, but my advice as someone who’s been married longer than you’ve been alive…you know when you fall in love. That’s the easy part. Admitting it and trying to get the balls to say it to her face is the harder part.”

“Sir, she doesn’t even know I exist. Or barely knows I do,” I said quietly. “I should-”

“Your little brother, god rest his soul, wants you to be happy, Winchester. So shoot your shot with this girl so you can stop having an existential crisis before my home opener, got it?” I glanced over my shoulder, coach’s face surprisingly soft for how close we were to game time. “She must be special to tame you.”

“She had me the whole time. The rest were me trying to forget.” He nodded, picking up his playbook again.

“Then go get this girl so you have your answer,” he said. “And stay out of my training room before games. Only place they can’t find me.”

“Yes sir.” I ducked back into the locker room, Benny gave me a raised eyebrow, silently asking if I was okay. I nodded and sat down to tie up my shoes, an idea sparking in my mind before I opened instagram. “Ben, take a picture of me.”

“Good god,” groaned Michael from my other side. “Like your insta doesn’t have enough shirtless selfies.”

He snagged my phone out of my hands, sighing as he took a photo of me smirking in my cubby.

“I regret being your friend,” he said, handing it back to me while Benny chuckled. 

“Same, Michael,” I smiled back before I was on insta and typing furiously. I posted before I could stop myself, Benny and Michael sharing a look and immediately going to their own phones. But they weren’t fast enough apparently.

“Winchester are you serious?” shouted Gabe from across the room, the whole team looking at their phones now.

“Yup,” I said, standing and tugging on my under armor v-neck, my shoulder pads and then my jersey. 

“You can’t force a girl to go out with you!” he shouted. 

“I’m not forcing. I’m offering a donation to her charity if she does feel inclined to go out with me,” I said with a shrug. Benny grabbed my shoulders, looking at me like I was crazy.

“Five million dollars? That’s not what I mean when I said impress her you idiot!” he said.

“That’s what the picture was for,” I said with a wink, my phone already buzzing non-stop at the incoming flood of texts and calls. “You think she’ll take me up on my offer?”

“This fucker’s really about to get a fucking date with Y/N Y/L/N through a fucking bribe,” said Michael, shaking his head. “Dude, you’re crushing so hard it’s in psycho territory.”

“One date is all I want,” I said, smiling when coach walked in, rolling his eyes at me. “Come on boys, time to focus on the game!”

Y/N POV

I was currently hiding in my bedroom, reading a book on Sunday evening, Eric doing his best to get my agent and manager and PR head out of the house without force. As expected, they’d reemed my ass out for not capitalizing on the Dean Winchester picture in the moment but I didn’t care. I didn’t care about hanging out with pretty fuck boys for publicity’s sake.

But I had followed him on my private account no one knew about. It’d taken a moment but I remembered who Dean Winchester was in our college days. He was flirty back then I remembered. And a good football player I guess. But I just remembered what happened in the spring semester, how the whole campus knew his pain before he had a chance to even process it.

My heart ached for a boy I’d said nothing more than a passing hello to at parties. 

I still felt that ache whenever I sang Finish Line. I’d never realized Dean went on to his own version of fame all those years ago. But I knew the hurt still existed in his heart. There was no healing it but some part of me wished I could soothe it for a moment. I forgot in the music sometimes. Maybe he could do the same when he played his games.

Maybe I really should have talked to him last night.

My phone buzzed and I saw a new post, this one of him making my jaw drop. “Hot damn you are good looking, Winchester.”

Then I shrieked when I looked at the caption.

DWinchester67 Hey @Y/NY/L/N it was fun running into you last night. How about you take me up on my offer and let me buy dinner for our first date? 

Oh and to sweeten the deal, I’ll donate five million dollars to your charity if you say yes (plus another million for each touchdown I throw tonight, those are freebies for ya). 

You got my number so waiting on you sweetheart. ;)

Eric was in the room before I could raise my head, eyes darting around the room before he determined there was no threat. 

“Jesus, girl. I swear if you saw a bug-”

“Dean Winchester asked me out. Publicly.” Eric narrowed his eyes as he tucked his gun back into the holster. 

“Okay…you made it clear to the team today you don’t want anything to do with a publicity stunt. What’s the problem?” You tossed the phone to the end of the bed, Eric sitting on the bench at the bottom to pick it up. He did a double take, eyes skirting to meet yours. “I’m doing a full background check on this man. He either really wants in your pants, to profit off you or he’s obsessive. To be honest, I don’t like any of those options.”

“Me either but five million dollars to the charity? Plus more? That could help kids, Eric. We could find a safe way to do this, right?” He pursed his lips, nodding once.

“One date at a place of my choosing. My team will be there in the background and I’m going to talk to this boy and let him know all of the ways I can kill him if he tries anything.” You smiled, Eric handing the phone back. 

“You’d kill your favorite football player for me. You’re too sweet Eric,” you chuckled. He stood up, adjusting his sports blazer.

“You know why I stuck with you when my agency assigned me to the Princess?” he asked, a dry laugh leaving his lips. “You always listened to me. You didn’t always agree but you listened and we could have conversations. We could have conversations about safety without you acting like a brat or me like an asshole. You respected me and that earned you loyalty all these years later.”

You stared your hands in your lap. “My parents lost one child. I don’t want them to lose another.”

You were surprised to find him come closer, sitting on the edge of the bed, turning to face you. He tucked your hair behind your ear, smiling softly. 

“Don’t lose hope now, kiddo. I’ve always admired that about you.” You looked away, Eric stroking your cheek with his thumb. “Someday we’ll find the truth. I promise.”

“My mom wishes it were me,” you said, shaking your head. “If I didn’t make my parents so much money I’d think they’d be plenty happy to let some crazy fan take me away forever. All because I was five minutes late to pick up Max and he decided to walk home.”

“Hey!” Eric gripped your shoulders hard, hard enough that you felt the strength of his hands down in your bones. He was always so gentle you with guiding touches here and there you often forgot he was as deadly with his hands as he was a weapon. 

You met his gaze, Eric sighing.

“That is not true and you know it.” His stern expression softened when you shook your head.

“She told me the day we had a funeral for him Max should have been there and I should have been the one missing. So I know, Eric.” He pulled you into a hug, letting you squeeze him tight.

“I know she did,” he whispered, your chin resting on his shoulder. “She has so many regrets from that time and knows what she said broke something with the two of you. But I have had countless conversations with them over the years. I know you trust me so trust me when I say, you are their world and it would destroy them to lose you. She always asks me if you’re happy because she says you put on your fake smile for her. She doesn’t blame you one bit for it.”

“I hate when you have points,” you said, closing your eyes, getting another squeeze from him. 

“Happy to help my buddy. So you don’t give up on Max yet, alright? Everyone else has. If he’s out there, he needs you to keep going for him.”

“No wonder your team adores you. Soft cuddly bear under all the threats of violence aren’t you?”

“It’s how I land so many chicks,” he chuckled. He kissed your temple and stood, cracking his back. “Respond back yes if you want to. Let me look into this Dean Winchester before you agree to anything else though.”

You hummed, clearing your throat when Eric was in the doorframe. “I-I do remember one thing about Dean in college. He had a younger brother Sam that went missing too. Never found him.”

Eric kept his back to you for a beat, nodding once. 

“Do you think Dean is a bad guy?”

“Gut check says no. Probably just wants a hookup,” he said before stepping out and pulling the door shut fast behind him. “Rowan, I swear to god you bother this girl tonight and I’ll shove my glock up your ass.”

“He asked her out! I need to talk to her!” he yelled back on the other side of the door. You sighed and put on your noise canceling headphones before going to instagram and tapping on his post. 

Y/NY/L/N @DWinchester67 One date. As friends Winchester

Not five seconds later you received a winking emoji and “friends” in response. 

“Dear god, you’re going to be a handful, Winchester.”

________

A/N: Read Part 2 here!

#supernatural #spn #dean winchester x reader #football au #au #dean winchester x #dean winchester au #spn au #spn fanfic #dean winchester x you #football player!dean x reader #series #supernatural fanfic

[krashoutluv]

You’ve been given AK Jason so much love thx ☺️ if it’s not too much… what are some of AK Jason’s comforts? Does he have comfort foods? 🥘 Does he like the sound of the rain? 🌧️ Naps on the couch ? 🛋️

Thx 🥰

ill give this man love anytime💟

and its never too much anon, i love writing for him and yall!

Comforting Ak!Jay

(IM SO PROUD OF THIS I 💟 MY AUTISM)

(ngl this also just turned into my character analysis of Ak!Jay’s psychological gymnastics from Comics ((AK Genesis & Batman: AK)) and games) (still wrote the comfort shit tho)

hc, but i dont think any jason todds like the rain. it reminds them too much of the time he was a kid, didnt have a place to stay and went to sleep cold and wet

or when he was still young and with his family, his apartment would get flooded.

BUT ANYWAYS—

alone, i dont think jason can comfort himself very well.

beats himself for it when its over, drops him back into a spiral

just very much not healthy

HOWEVEER with someone is very different ,,

I Ramble Abt Jason Todd

post writing this, i feel like that one tweet thats like, ‘i never realized she was holding a plate of corn in this scene.’

Ak!Jays spirals or episodes come from two things, his self-esteem or self-worth, along with his lack of self-identity

Ak!Jason (Post/During AK) has a very hard time with his self worth, it solely stems from wanting to prove people wrong about himself. he obviously doesn’t like being perceived in the wrong way.

Ak!Jason (Post/During AK) says he’s move pasts his traumas, yet his identity and reasoning is constantly rooted in them, leading to so much contradictory dialogue and mental FUCKING GYMNASTICS.

ak!jay juggling if he wants to be loved by batman/batfam or wants to end it

i think he often ponders if he was better off being killed by the joker, or if he can really be redeemed from his actions as Arkham Knight by helping Gotham as Red Hood.

and if it’s enough for the people around him or someone to accept him.

if he can truly ever be loved

he has a lot of crisises about his identity and purpose more often then not b/c he cant find a reason for either besides his own anger and approval addiction.

, his biggest fear is losing, being worthless, and unwanted.

his constant drive is winning and proving himself as the best.

it causes his always feeling the need to prove himself, just so that hes wanted.

full pic is him on hid knees begging alfred for help,, my baby—-

the first introduction of his internalized self-deprecation is with his father, other then the Arkham Knight Annual

though he rejects this “truth” in the Annual, showing his determination to prove himself more then what Bruce and the Joker idealizes him to be, I think its a good mirror into Jasons mind and what really makes him start cracking

Ex. , his biological father canonically telling him he was a loser growing up, and his mom seems to personify/objectify Jason as gothams gravitation keeping them in gotham.

another example is the way he is talked to throughout scarecrows psychotropic

throughout the comic and game he goes between or showing a desire for a connection with bruce and praising joker for his upbringing, then chastising them.

its very clear jason has an identity issue, with him isolating himself because he believes he is too broken (game dialogues), his need for validation stemming from his childhood, his fear of abandonment, and overall internal dilemmas of wanting a connection or not. obviously hes not good with working out his emotions on his own without doing considerably impulsive things.

jason wanting to be his own person v jason wanting to be a better person for the people in his life

He see’s the place he was tortured as a rebirth for him, along with his plan to destroy Gotham and Bruce.(AK: Genesis)

This only comes from his desire to want his own separate identity, by ending these cycles of Bruces actions and Gothams nightmares he also believes that he will be truly free.

his only true identification with himself is anger and resentment, being built, gravitated, and broken by anger. feeling like hes always losing or lost, and his desire to just win something and therefore be wanted

okay to stop a fuckton of more rambling jason todd, abandoment issues, jealousy/obsession issues, need for connection, validation, relationships, self-destructive isolation, brainwashing induced perception issue, intense mood swings which also cause perception issues.

i guess it could try to be argued that Jason doesn’t actually want validation bc he got over the psychotropic; but i disagree with the way he constantly talks about being underestimated and feeling like he has to prove himself throughout the comics and his dialogue with Barbra in game.

i also want to make it clear that throughout the ak!comics he does help civilians so it does really have morality for other people. He does separate Gothams Gravity from the people, and claims the worst of the worst (villains and such) are the people who succumb to gotham.

(im only stopping bc im on mobile and couldn’t put anymore pictures)

im so upset.

theres so much i didnt get to talk abt

Ok Actually Comforting

so its pretty god damn hard to comfort this dude, he’s a chronic over analyzer, could probably turn anything and everything you say against himself or you, and yet would crave validation and intimacy.

which makes him a bit of a trip,, but i love him. so.

a lot of the time you’ll have to go with his flow

if its really bad he’ll isolate himself, he feels like he’s letting you down by breaking in front of you. He can’t let you see him as weak because to him its a liability for your relationship.

as well as the fact that his perception becomes very extreme/warped when very emotional. he’ll can range from believe your lying to him, to he’s not worth that kind of comfort and he’s wasting your time.

it takes a lot of patience for him to accept that he isnt an inconvenience to you and you do actually care

overtime, a lot of fucking time, he’ll slowly come around to this. instead of leaving for days or weeks at a time, Jason will leave for at most a day or two, but around midnight he’ll be home craving your presence.

he cant be alone again, he really doesn’t wanna be alone again, he needs to make sure you don’t wanna leave him.

probably just goes to sleep facing you, or holding your hand if hes feeling especially mushy.

he’d be so quiet, having the internal battle of leaving you or letting him feed into his desire of just having you around him.

In his words, needing a home. feeling safe, and warm. (I LIED I DELETED TWO PICS TO SHOW THIS)

jason thinking of alfred as home>>

Jason needs that in a partner! Someone who is warm to him! someone who makes him feel wanted or needed! Someone who makes him feel safe!

I think if you catch him just as he gets triggered/begins to spiral, you can help him not crash out.

Being over the top mushy with him isnt gonna work, he needs someone to ground him and be 100% with him.

sometimes he doesn’t need to talk or just doesn’t want to, again presence.

but acknowledging him every now and then to make sure he knows your not brushing him off or forgot about him.

when you’re in a closer relationship he definitely just wants you in his arms, needs to hold you close.

Home-cooked meals with him, justing going about your life with him, making him feel wanted, making him feel acknowledged.

i think he’d open up every now and then, but i think he’s also still a self-assured person who needs guidance at the right time. to just be sure he’s on the right path and youre with him.

one of his triggers is his own jealousy, accidentally making him feel like he’s replaceable or him believing you’ll get tired of him.

he needs so much reassurance.

just be there with him, guide him, love him, make sure he’s on the right path.

he needs a lot of things, sometimes its naps, sometimes its food, sometimes just to be in your arms, sometimes to help you cook, sometimes watching you work, sometimes he’ll have you lay your back on his chest and read with him, sometimes he just wants to fall asleep with you, sometimes he wants to cry in your arms, JUSDHRIDJDJDISO JASON TODD COME HOME WE MISS YOUUUU

HES MY HIGH MAINTENANCE GF

this was so satisfying to write i <3 jason todd

rq/inbox is open !! if you just wanna yap or wanna request somethin’ go ahead!

#jason todd #jason todd x reader #arkham knight x reader #jason peter todd #arkham knight #skullkidwithsunglasses #i ramble about arkham knight heheheej #jason todd headcanon #red hood headcanons #red hood x reader #red hood

[janisbuggybones]

Rent-a-yandere!....please, we're begging you take them off our hands.

Janis Foster (my oc) × gn!reader

Cw: yandere, rent a partner situation, trans girl yandere, poly relationship kinda, pretty short idk what else I could say, pretty boring tbh (only realizing this as I got to the elevator part :( )

Og idea is from @moyazaika on this post that I kinda spit balled off of and then got the motivation to write again.

You can't believe you found yourself coming to this. One too many late night browsing sessions led you to get overwhelmed with adverts about this new fad in the dating scene. Rent-a-yandere, the hottest site online where you could find a devoted lover for cheap.99 per hour. In all honesty, it did seem appealing when compared to the heartbreak and trauma you've expierienced prior, but you dare stoop so low?

"Hello darling, are you (y/n) (l/n)?" A tall girl said from behind you. She had beautiful pearly paper white skin and matching hair put in one long braid. She had piercing red eyes and dare you mention her height? She was at least nearly twice your height, but her body wasn't well built. She couldn't have been living very healthily If she was that skinny. She had a large chest, despite her skinny body, well in her description it had said she had some cosmetic surgery done before. It didn't look fake or anything and it's not like she showed it off. She wore a modest black turtle neck with small embroidered hearts on the cuffs and chest of the sweater. The sweater was paired with some baggy black jeans and simple black work boots.

Fuck yes

"Oh, yeah that's me...you're Janis Foster, right?" You found yourself asking after getting over the height difference. Shit, were you being rude? She's really pretty, come on, don't fuck it up.

"Yep, the one and only. Honestly I'd be surprised if anyone got me confused for someone else." She smiled softly, her soft pink lips looked tantalizing. "Well, let's be on our way then. I've arranged a breakfast date for us before a big day of fun" She said as she grabbed your hand with her own cold and large hand. Her nails lacked any polish and were neatly manicured.

You remembered you picked the option for her to come up with the itinerary. You hoped it wouldn't be too exhausting, the public can be a bit overwhelming. "A-ah okay!" You find yourself smiling slightly as you went along with her.

She took you to an animal themed Cafe nearby, themed after your favorite pet animal. "I thought you'd like this, darling" She giggled as she checked you both in, having made a reservation. You recall mentioning your favorite animal in the description of yourself they required you to give them.

"Nice and quiet, and they limit it to 10 customers in here at any given time, so I won't have to worry" She giggled innocently but you read between the lines. It made you blush at the thought of such an attractive woman getting jealous of you.

You two were taken to your seat, a seat in the back where one of the animals sat on the table. You promptly gave your order and she gave hers before you were left alone with her.

"Honestly I'm not much of an animal person..I feel like it's a good bit of upkeep that i couldn't keep up with. But I do have a little lavender bunny at home. His name is Geo" She said, starting a conversation as she looked around.

"Oh? Is he purple? I didn't know bunnies could be purple" you said, interested as you looked at the calm animal on the table before it left, instead taking the window sill beside your table as its resting place.

"Oh they do, it's a bit rarer than your average bunny so he cost a good bit, but he's Oh so adorable" She smiled, her bluish eyes landing on you. "I'd say nearly as much as you, cutie" She teased, which left you blushing slightly as you avoided her eye contact for a second.

"O-oh yeah?" You smiled slightly, you never were able to take compliments well.

"Mhm, oh look, food's here" She smiled as the waitress brought your orders. Janis had ordered a simple cup of juice, a bagel, and small bowl of a variety of fruits.

"Thank you for coming here today" the waitress said with a smile as she walked to serve another table.

Janis stared at her for a second with an unreadable expression before turning to you. "In my opinion, breakfast isn't that good. Lunch and dinner foods are far superior" She said with a sip of her juice.

That statement had ignited a conversation that then strayed to your favorite foods and then on to other topics as you ate and enjoyed her company. She wasn't too overwhelming and was sweet up until you two had been finished for a good bit and were asked to leave because her reservation had ended.

She pouted but complied, leaving with you to her next planned activity.

"You had mentioned you liked anime and movies, so I thought we could see that new studio ghibli movie together?" She said with a contagious smile. "You know the guy who writes them and all, Hayao Miyazaki? He keeps announcing his retirement but then goes back to the studio with a new script each time, it's pretty funny when in the interviews with employees they complain about that." She giggled.

"Oh? I can imagine the frustration they must feel" you smiled slightly as you two entered the theater. You then realized, shit, this place is gonna be crowded. Fuck, you hoped it wouldn't be too overwhelming. She then promptly paid for your tickets and some snacks to accompany your movie viewing.

You two passed the many movie posters on the halls as you walked to the movie screening. Dread hit you as you opened the door and you two went in, only to crumble away when the theater had been empty. Did she really book this entire theater room for you?

"Yeah I'm not too good in a crowd either, I'm a walking distraction" She smiled slightly as she led you two to a good pair of seats in the middle of the theater.

"U-uhm I don't know what to say-t-thank you, this is crazy. How did you get your company to pay for something like this?" You found yourself asking. "W-wait sorry I didn't mean to say that, I'm sorry..." you apologize a second later after seeing how that could be offensive.

"Oh? They'd never pay for something this expensive. While their other services are much more profitable, my section doesn't get nearly as many sponsored activities like this. I paid out of pocket so you wouldn't feel wierd in the crowd, darling" She smiled. God that smile, how she acted, you swore you'd fall for her before she fell for you.

Her explanation left you blushing and wordless as adverts started rolling on the big projector screen. You unintentionally just ended up staying quiet and watching the movie with her. At around the halfway point of the movie, when you both finished your snacks, she had began holding your hand. It shocked you at first, before you relaxed, discretely returning the gesture.

The rest of the movie went along swimmingly. The plot was heart wrenching and hadn't made you cry, but did arise sadness in you.

As you two walked out the theater and you winced at the bright light, she prosed a question.

"So darling, my place or yours?" She asked "for our next little activity I have planned, a baking sesh" She added with a smile. "I had cute mochi and cookies in mind" She smiled "though mochi isn't baking, it's versatility as something you can shape into a cute thing is almost unmatched" She said

"O-oh-um" you said, taken aback by the idea. You had liked cooking to an extent and mentioned that, but wow. She really planned this out and it left you blushing again....wait...wasn't it in the terms and conditions that neither of you could go to the others house?.....maybe it was for their other service, rent-a-darling? You couldn’t recall and your place was a mess. "My place doesn't look the best...is yours okay?" You asked shyly

Janis giggled "of course! Anything you want is okay with me darling" She smiled as she held your hand and went with you in the direction of her apartment.

Surprisingly based on her ability to buy out a whole theater for you, her apartment was relatively average, though it ran a bit on the pricier side because of the economy lately. The inside looked clean and nice, and the elevator ride was relaxed as she started a conversation about her apartment complex.

"I dont mean to show off where i live, but i hope you like it. When I started living here, it was actually way cheaper than it is now, I'm glad they never raised the price for my rent though. I'm kind of friends with the owner. Not in a wierd way, but we hang out like once a month. They're in my friend group I've had since middle school" She said as she watched the numbers on the small screen above the door go up.

"Oh, that's interesting. I wish I had something like that with my landlord. I've recently been trying to save up for something I want, and it's not going too good in all honesty..... Damn gacha games, am I right?" You smiled, feeling comfortable, but then suddenly worrying you overshared.

"Oh don't get me started! I started playing this gacha game that recently came out and ahhh! The skins look so good, but two are locked behind a pay wall each update" She huffed slightly. "And all the characters have such diverse designs and tons of different ethnicities, how could I not pull for them all and be absoloutely broke in unilogs?" She laughed softly before the elevator stopped, the 6th floor. "Alright now to 603" She said as she held your hand and walked to her apartment.

Nothing was out of the ordinary about her apartment, it was pretty plain actually. Apart from the squishimallows instead of pillows on the couch of her living room. The kitchen was lightly messy, a bowl and cup in her sink with a few pieces of silverware and a stray rag just on the counter.

"It's not much, but it's comfortable for me" She said "well, settle in, I have to go check on geo real quick, I'm sorry darling" She said, excusing herself before leaving to the other room.

"It's fine" you find yourself saying quietly, overwhelmed by the events of today. This was all crazy....how were you now in a crazy hot girl's apartment?! The one chronically bitchless person of the high-school friend group, in this stunning woman's house? It was unbelievable...until you considered this was a paid date. Then reality sunk in. Shit...should you ask her out for real? Would that be okay? Would she be okay with that? She wasn't much of a yandere...it'd be okay, right?

"He was such a hungry little boy, he ate down all his celery in a minute" She giggled happily as she came back and saw you still had your bag with your outing necessities on.

"Oh want me to take that for you?" She offered and you obliged.

"Oh thank you...I feel like I haven't properly thanked you enough today" you said as you looked around.

"Oh don't worry, the pleasure is mine, darling" She smiled "now, shall we get cooking?" She smiled as she put on a pink frilly apron. Shit...you didn't know how to feel.

"Alright" you offered in response with a fake smile as you took the apron She handed you. It was your favorite color and had a lap pocket and chest pocket shaped in hearts of a slightly brighter color.

You two then spent the next couple hours baking cookies and making mochi, before settling down on her couch and watching the news, because nothing else was on, as you enjoyed the fruits of your labor.

"It's not too sweet is it darling? I heard cookies need some salty aspect to balance out all the flavors" She smiled softly as a missing persons report came on over the tv.

Geo Archviste, a 5'4" man with black and white naturally colored hair and blue freckles. Missing since this day 3 years ago, he would have been 21 by now.

That was terrible, his family must be haunted by their missing son...wait-

"Darling?" She asked, as you kinda ignored her prompt for conversation. "Everything okay?" She asked.

"Uhm yeah- that missing persons case...just seems sad." You found yourself saying as you swallowed the crumbly cookie.

"Oh...yeah...that boy was actually my ex...we broke up a year before he went missing but we were still on good terms" She said sadly. "I miss him...I named my little bunny after him" Janis said as she looked down.

"Oh I'm so sorry, I didn't know......I hope he gets found" was all you could find yourself saying, but something didn't seem right. Not that what she said had any contradictions, but you just had this uneasy feeling. "Um restroom?" You asked

"By the door with heart decals on the left down the hall, darling" She smiled sadly and you excused yourself.

You walked down the hall and found the room, but the heart decorated room piqued your interest. She wouldn't mind...right? You opened the door and were met with darkness until you cut on the light and saw a figure sitting on Janis' bed, restrained on his feet and hands heavily.

All you could really see was their perfectly trimmed black and white locks that hid their sleeping face...matching the picture of the man on the missing persons report.

Chills ran down your spine as you went to grab your phone but it wasn't in your pocket. Shit you must have left it behind....how could you sneak out with the missing boy?

You struggled with yourself over this until you heard Janis coming and ducked into a open closet after turning off the light, shutting it behind you.

"Geo darling, I'm back" She smiled as she cut the light on and walked up to him. He looked at her tiredly and sniffled quietly.

"Remember my side gig to try and find you a buddy we can both love?" She asked "I think I found the one, they're so cute! And we baked some things, you could probably smell it" She giggled "I'll give you some when they leave...if they get to. I haven't decided if I wanna reel them in or just go in all at once and kidnap them like I did you" She said happily

"I'd say just kidnap them, two minds are better than one" he sighed, implying you could help him escape her.

"Come on now, I love you...you love me, i know it" She huffed

"Yeah true..which is why I want you to get help instead of doing this to me...." he sighed

"Stop it, i don't need help" She mumbled

"Yes you do. I love you and want to be with you, but you did this and refuse to get therapy. I only broke up with you because you killed my friend, remember. Get your head out of the past and live with me now. I'll stay and all like I've said repeatedly- just come-" he said before she interrupted him.

"Shut up! I don't need help! I'm perfectly fine and you need to shut up. You're only still tied up because you tried to escape the other month!" She shouted, less sad and more angrily.

"That was last year! I've been good for you so I can do normal couple things with you and we could have found our third lover together!" He shouted back, making her tear up.

"Shut up! I'm going back to (y/n)....I promise you'll love them as much as I do" She said shakily before you backed up a bit too far and bumped against the wall.

She looked dead at the closet in shock before walking up to it and opening it.

"Darling?"

#yandere #janis foster #original character #trans yandere #trans #yandere oc #tw yandere #date-a-yandere #Rent-a-yandere

[decayedgloria]

losing myself in your forever

ft. Childe

There is a secret that you keep from your lover, but there may be more than just your identity that lies hidden between you and him

Tags: Childe x afab!reader, adeptus!reader, morning sex, smut only in the beginning, fluff, somewhat canon compliant, cursing, nsfw, platonic!zhongli, fwb (ish?), use of russian/chinese nicknames, pwp, praising, may make a part 2, this is much more plot than I am used to, mdni, nsfw under cut.

Word Count: ~2.6k, not proofread

The early morning rays shined softly into the bedroom you laid in, snugly tucked into the arms of your lover. You lazily traced his freckled forearm as you hummed, contentedly listening to his shallow heartbeat as he slept. 

This scene was not unfamiliar to you. After a night of lustful entanglement, you always wake up in Childe’s arms, your limbs tangled with his as you recount your liaison with a hazy grin. More often than not you always awoke before him, which gave you ample time to take in the sight before you.

Waiting for your lover to rise was one of the few things you came to enjoy after the first few times you were in bed together, watching his battle-worn chest rise and fall with each breath as his peaceful face rested. His face was not usually so, it was filled with mirth and bloodlust during the day, but in these rare moments of tranquility, they were a world away.

As you kept humming, you felt him stir under you, finally waking up. You gave Childe a small smile when his eyes opened, revealing the prettiest blue hues- something you’ve always attributed to uncut noctilucous jade.

“Good morning my love.” You place a chaste kiss on his lips, which he returned in slow earnest. Grinning, he brings a hand to cup your face as he does, gently caressing your cheek with his thumb. 

“Morning, kotichek.” His voice was still low and raspy from the night before, sending delightful shivers through your veins. Hearing him speak in his mother tongue certainly didn’t help, either. Your eyes bore into his as you kiss him once more moving to sit up on his lap, earning a chuckle from him.

“Has anyone ever told you that you sound so alluring when you say that?” You cheekily press your chest against his, teasing him just a little. Your hips were angled in a way that hovered your cunt just above his already-hard member, and you bore your eyes into his own half-lidded ones.

“Only you.” And your chest swelled with pride, just a little, at his words. Whether or not it was true, you didn’t care. As your lips touched Childe’s once again, all you knew was that in this moment he was yours. 

Never in your thousand years of living have you had someone like this. Someone to hold you so tenderly as he slipped into you, soft groans emanating from his chest. His hands were firmly on your hips, rocking you gently as you continued to kiss him, albeit sloppily. Your hands tangled themselves in his ginger hair, pulling him closer to you as he devoured you.

Being an adeptus was usually a lonely experience. Living in solitary in Jueyun Karst had given you no experience with humans and human emotions whatsoever. While you weren’t completely alone, sometimes you craved interaction with someone who wasn’t an adeptus as well. Which brought you to Liyue Harbor months ago, against the will of Cloud Retainer and your brother, you still went to the city to search for anyone, really, who was willing to be your friend.

Who knew such a cute Snezhnayan boy eating at the same food kiosk as you could be so much more than that?

Your pace became faster and more erratic as you both felt your orgasms come closer. Now you were practically bouncing on his cock, moaning his name as his hands traveled across your body, pinching and squeezing every crevice.

“You make me feel so good, kotichek…” He groaned, pressing his head into your shoulders. “Pussy’s so good only for me, right?” Unconsciously pulling him closer to you, you grind your hips deeper into his as you continued your pace, a light sheen of sweat beginning to form over your body as you do so.

“Yes, yes- only for you! Ah- your cock feels so good inside me…!” You whined deliciously. Childe grinned hazily at the sight of you, taking in how you writhed against him in pleasure. His hands made their way to your breasts as he gently kneaded them, rolling with your nipples in between his thumb and index finger.

It only took a few more thrusts for you to reach your high. You threw your head back, almost screaming, while your cunt squeezed his cock- causing him to cum inside you. Panting, you keep your position on top of him, slumping in his arms as he catches your breathless form easily.

Childe plants a kiss on your shoulder blade, holding you in his arms tenderly as your body recovers. “Did you enjoy it?” He always asked you that question, even if he already knew the answer. From your shaky legs to your puffy lips, he could already tell; but Childe preferred when you told him directly.

“I always enjoy my time with you, tián xīn.” The name, which used to be unfamiliar to you, came easily across your tongue now that you’re in front of him. You suddenly sighed, rolling over to the other side of the bed to let him get up and ready for the day.

“You aren’t gonna get ready?” He asked as he swiped his scattered clothes off the floor, getting ready to take a shower. “Not busy today?” 

“Mm… it’s not like I can walk anyways, so no. Not busy.” You shook your head, a light chuckle escaping your lips. Childe laughed in response, something that never failed to make your stomach do flips.

“You did ask for it, kotichek. I’m just simply here to deliver.” Your thighs were starting to sore and burn, though it was nothing compared to the wounds you’d been dealt during battle. Not that Childe would ever know about those, or about the fact that you weren’t human at all. 

It’s for the better, you reasoned with yourself. Had he known, you doubted that he’d stay with an adeptus like you. Immortal, forever living while he would most likely die in battle or due to age. It saddened you, just a little, that it was the reality you had to face sooner or later, but just for a little bit, you can keep this charade going.

You were lost in your thoughts when Childe waved his hand in front of your face, causing you to blink. You hadn’t realized you were so wrapped up in your thoughts that you completely missed him finishing his shower, and now bidding you goodbye.

“Thought I lost you for a sec.” He cheekily grinned, giving you a kiss on your forehead. “What were you thinking about?”

“Nothing… it’s nothing.” If he noticed how quiet your voice was, he didn’t show it. Instead, he kissed you again, this time on the lips. “I’m going to see my brother today, I think. I might visit him at work.” You gave him a reassuring smile, “Be safe, tián xīn.”

His expression dipped a little as you said that. Unbeknownst to him, you knew he was a Fatui harbinger. However, they can’t all be bad, right? Certainly not him, who showers you with warm kisses and the sweetest affections when you’re together. Childe said so himself that he would die before ever thinking about hurting you, so what’s there to be afraid of?

“I’ll try, kotichek.” He gave you one last kiss before exiting the room, closing the door behind him gently. You sighed once more, sitting on the edge of the bed to dangle your feet while your thoughts rant rampant and your chest tightened with every breath.

Perhaps consulting your brother would give you a solution.

-

When you stepped into the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor to ask for your brother, Hu Tao all but gawked at you from behind the counter.

“Mr. Zhongli? You’re his sister?” You had never met the young girl before, so it wasn’t surprising for her to look at you with such… curious eyes. Her gaze made you feel like you were laid out on an examination table, being investigated for some sort of anomaly. You shook off the feeling as you returned her smile politely.

“Yes. I was wondering if he’s in right now?” The girl shook her head, pointing a solemn finger to the double doors.

“Aiya, he’s out on personal business right now. I think he said he was in Liuli Pavillion?” Hu Tao brought her hand to her chin, thinking. “That’s probably where you can find him. But, aside from that, would you be interested in pre-ordering a coffin for your funeral?” You look at her quizzically, seeing as her expression was bright and mischievous despite talking about your death.

“Ah, no thank you. That won’t come for a long time.” You smile nervously, getting ready to leave the parlor.

“Never say never! After all, our archon just died, so really it could be any of us next!” You shook your head.  Was this really how they advertised? It was a bit crass; you wondered if they had any customers at all at this rate. 

Making your way into the restaurant, you find that your brother’s meeting hasn’t started yet, giving you some time to chat with him. As you walked in, your brother was sipping his tea, opening his eyes to look at you.

“Gēge, how are you?” You greeted the man politely, “I hope you aren’t too busy yet.”

“What a wonderful surprise, mèi mei. Please have a seat, my meeting won’t begin for a few minutes.” His reassuring smile calmed you a little as you pulled out a chair, sitting on it before letting out a relaxed breath.

“What’s been troubling you now, little rascal?” You perked up at the nickname, the tips of your ears turning pink. Was your expression really that obvious? Zhongli only chuckled at your reaction, looking at you expectantly.

“I- Well, uh…” You weren’t sure how to begin your question, or even if you should ask it at all. Nervousness coursed through your body under his watchful gaze, eyes flitting around the room as you try to steady yourself.

“In all my years of knowing you, you have never been this shy. Tell me, what’s gotten to you this time mèi mei?” Now he was concerned, shifting towards you eagerly as you take a deep breath.

“Well… I’ve taken a mortal lover…” Your voice became quiet, red suddenly blossoming on your face as you look down in shyness and partial shame. It was a bit embarrassing to admit to Zhongli that fact but considering the rest of the adepti and their feelings towards humans, you hoped that he was at least understanding of your situation.

“And I don’t know if I should continue it or not. Y’know, since I’m not exactly mortal and all… Basically, how do I tell them?” 

“Hmm…” Zhongli thought for a moment. You couldn’t make anything of the expression on his face, but you hoped he wasn’t disappointed or angry. It wasn’t likely, but when it came to you, he was awfully protective; you were his precious sister, blood or not.

“What’s their temperament? You cannot know how they will react if you do not know their personality well enough,” He concluded, “Do they at least treat you well enough?” That sentence was laced with a dangerously low tone, his golden eyes suddenly darkening at the thought of someone hurting you.

“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that, gēge- he’s wonderful.” A small smile graced your features as you thought about Childe. “He’s thoughtful, considerate, he’s a lot of fun. He’s also quite handsome, I’d say.” Zhongli relaxed a little, yet again sipping his tea as he listened to you ramble on about your lover. 

He would be lying if he said you weren’t cute at this moment, who would have thought that his rambunctious, troublemaker sister would have found someone who she cherished in that way? The thought warmed his heart. Perhaps a meeting with this individual was in order.

“...and he always gets me the foods I love from Xinyue Kiosk.” You hadn’t noticed you were rambling until Zhongli cleared his throat, snapping you out of your small tirade. Sheepishly, you silence yourself rather quickly, listening to what your brother had to say.

“If he is such a good man, with a good temperament, and loves you so, then you have nothing to fear mèi mei. Humans are simple creatures, after all.” He gave you a small smile, which comforted you just a little. His response managed to convince you of telling Childe, and you decided that the next time you would see him would be the time to do so.

“I am curious about this mortal. Do you wish to introduce me to him someday?” 

“Yes, of course. I’m also curious if he’d meet your expectations, gēge.” You let out a giggle, thinking about the meeting already. Childe wouldn’t know that Zhongli was an adeptus, much less Rex Lapis, so you were confident that he wouldn’t be intimidated away. Though, you had to be sure that your brother wouldn’t pull any fast ones on him…

Suddenly, the door to the restaurant opened, and you could hear footsteps of multiple people walking in. Probably your brother’s guests. You stood up from your chair, as did Zhongli, as you both got ready to bid each other goodbye.

Your brother pulled you into a warm embrace, which you returned. “Make sure to inform me of your decision, mèi mei. Until next time-”

“Hey.”

You break away from the embrace hastily, not wanting to embarrass your brother in front of his guests. As you whirl around, you prepare yourself to bow apologetically to them, until you caught a glimpse of who they were.

There he stood. Childe, looking just as surprised as you were as his eyes darted between you and your brother suspiciously. Behind him were two others, a blonde outlander wearing foreign clothes, and a floating child. It felt like an eternity that you both stood there in shock, only being able to look at each other until Zhongli cleared his throat once again.

“Welcome. Pleasure to see you again, Childe.” He greets them, casting a side glance at your agape expression. “Please, let’s have a seat. My sister was just about to leave so we can start discussing our pressing matters.” 

When you said you wanted Zhongli and Childe to meet, you didn’t mean as soon as possible. No, not like this. Not during a business meeting- wait. Him being here… that meant Zhongli already knew Childe. Ah, you weren’t sure if that made the situation easier to handle or not.

“Yes. I was leaving, sorry for the inconvenience. I’ll take my leave now.” The words practically fly out of your mouth as you rush past Childe and his party, missing his hurt gaze following you as you did so. He wanted so badly to follow you and ask you what you were doing here, were you really Rex Lapis’s sister? Who were you, exactly?

Zhongli noticed everything. From the way you tensed up when Childe entered the room, and how you seemed to avoid him when leaving. You were never one to do that, you always took the time to chat even a little. And Childe… the look on his face when he saw you indicated something to Zhongli that there was something going on between the both of you. How his gloved hand twitched to the direction you left in, almost instinctively, and how his eyes followed you across the room.

The adeptus closed his eyes for a brief moment, the twitch in his eyebrows so subtle that it almost seemed like it didn’t happen. Under the guise of pleasantries, his golden eyes stared right into the harbinger’s soul, almost wanting to claw through him as he talked apprehensively.

Of all the people in Liyue, why must it be the fucking eleventh harbinger?

i am exhausted. this fic was born out of three restless nights. i need sleep.

Anyways sorry that this isn't like a simple one shot :/// i had a jam going and i needed to write it out. i think there will be a part 2 tho, like very likely, but it'll be much more angsty bc i need to practice writing angst lol

expect a sundress szn for some other characters in the future, working on one rn

#genshin imagines #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin smut #genshin childe #genshin zhongli #genshin impact smut #childe x reader #childe smut #fluff #afab reader

[theodysseyofhomer]

when i insist on odysseus as a rape victim i'm not trying to absolve him of patriarchy. he is, in many ways, a hero of patriarchy. even if i think some of the people who use him that way rhetorically have probably not read the odyssey, let alone understood its nuances, the cultural world of the poem and the narrative itself are patriarchal, and odysseus is both a product and perpetrator of that. but when i read about calypso forcing odysseus to have sex with her, i will still call it rape, not because i like him as a character, although i do, but because i think to not do so reveals a very troubling attitude toward rape and patriarchy in the ancient context and now.

i've tried and tried but i don't know how to have this conversation with someone who is determined not to accept the premise that, in the text of the odyssey, odysseus has no choice in the matter. if they've read the text, it's right there. from what i can read of the greek, it's there (ἀνάγκη, force, constraint). i've never read a translation where it wasn't there. if they just don't care, that pretty much kills the discussion.* but sometimes they'll try to sidestep it, bringing up that the text implies he slept with calypso willingly at some point, or arguing that she doesn't explicitly compel him on the last night they spend together before he leaves ogygia forever.** to be frank, that's not the point. i'm not trying to absolve him even of the accusation of cheating on penelope. i'm not saying he was faithful to penelope. i'm saying he was still, at the point that we meet him in the odyssey, raped. period. i'm saying that's important in some way. i'm saying that using that word is important.

odysseus has power, as a man in a patriarchal society, but that power is not absolute. power is never absolute. i've heard it suggested that in the ancient context, the rape of odysseus is comic, in the sense of affirming life even in its indignities, and in the sense that humiliation is amusing (i have a lot of disagreements with the article, but it has given me endless food for thought). i'm quoting at length here, but bear with me:

Athena leaves Odysseus lingering on Calypso’s island in what is certainly the most unheroic, most challenging of all the trials that befall him on his return home. The narrator describes Odysseus as desperately wanting to leave Ogygia, crying in homesickness, but having to stay and, more to the point, share Calypso’s bed. I mentioned much earlier that an audience of that period would not expect celibacy from a married male away from home. Yet the situation must produce, it seems to me, quite another reaction in the males in the audience when the narrator emphasizes Odysseus’ profound unhappiness with the arrangements. In a patriarchal society of that time, where marriages were arranged and wedding nights were more likely than not sanctioned rape scenes, households teemed with female slaves, the highways and byways with prostitutes, men were no doubt accustomed from puberty to have their way easily with women, and on their own terms. Nothing in their experience would prepare them for enforced sexual servitude to a woman. [...] With this episode, the narrator has introduced a comic counterpart to the ubiquitous comments on the faithful Penelope’s celibacy, that is, the image of her husband manfully performing his nightly duties in the home of the insatiable Calypso. It is comic, yes, but also every man’s deepest fear.

why is it comic? because it's a reversal of expectation, of roles, of fortune. why is it unexpected? because it exploits the fear that a man could be treated by a woman the way he treats a woman; because a woman becomes monstrous by acting like a man. these are misogynistic ideas and fears, and they sound strikingly modern.

which means that: i understand the impulse to salvage calypso's image. i understand how it could be interesting or productive or empowering maybe, for some women, because homer is so concerned with any fault in penelope's sex life (reinforced by clytemnestra’s, and those of the slave women that odysseus and penelope own) and seemingly not at all with odysseus’. but calypso is arguing for the right of female gods to treat human beings however they want to, not for the rights of human women.

it also means that: the rape of odysseus becomes remarkable, when the rape of countless others is not, because of who he is. it's humiliating for him to be treated like a sex slave because he's a man and a king; other slaves are just slaves. similar logic is found elsewhere in the odyssey (it's humiliating for him to be treated like a beggar, but the other beggar in the house is just a beggar). this is not a text that believes in equal rights of any kind. but i think we have to ask the question, is it not rape because of that? should we not call it rape because he's a man, because he's a man who perpetrates specific evils, because other people have it worse? and why do i keep arguing that his situation is important to remark on?

god. i don't know. sometimes? just because we don't.

i've lost count of posts like this, comments like this, attitudes like this, of how many times i mention the odyssey and immediately hear about calypso, of how at best odysseus weeping on ogygia becomes the butt of the joke. and i'm not sorry that i don't find it more progressive than treating calypso as a shrill misogynistic stereotype. i do not find it interesting or original to take a man who is not in the position of power in a sexual encounter and say that he's being either disingenuous, ungrateful, or mystifying.

when we refuse to name what calypso does to odysseus as rape, absolutely regardless of what we feel for him, just that it happened, that that's what's going on, i think we do something sinister, potentially to real people. especially because this exists in a text where slavery is also often unnamed in translation and discussion, and other forms of rape and captivity and human suffering, and i think we need to name them all, without being afraid that naming one will take away from the others. saying odysseus was raped doesn't mean we excuse the intense misogyny penelope is subjected to, the enslaved lives of melantho and the other hanged women. it all matters. it's all important.

*as does the suggestion that odysseus could be lying and actually had a great time. but odysseus isn't the one telling us what's going down on ogygia; the narrator is. when given the opportunity, odysseus himself says very little, only maintaining that his heart wasn't in it. of course odysseus could be lying. he could always be lying. but calypso is the most relevant counter-perspective we have, and even she doesn't claim that odysseus wants her, just that she thinks he ought to be happy with her. it's to her obvious frustration that he isn't. without another authority in the text, saying "it could be straight lies" is a conversational dead-end.

and if, by the way, there's a lost version of the odyssey in which odysseus was philandering, and the version we have was written to clear him of those charges... it's still the version we have. how we deal with it says something about us.

**if i say "calypso raped odysseus" and a hypothetical person (actually several real people i have encountered) makes this counterargument, that implies that the threat of force is, then, what? not real? if 'at some point' being willing means that the harm of whatever came after that point is negated, it casts him as someone who mopes around out of boredom with an equal partner, when the text seems much clearer on the point that he's in this position against his will than under what circumstances and for how long he might have slept with her willingly. they are clearly not equals by the mere fact that she is a goddess; his mortality is, in calypso's eyes, the barrier between them. rip to everyone who finds the decision to leave ogygia a "surprising choice" but i am never less surprised by odysseus than when he's handling calypso as delicately as possible, in order to leave her as fast as he can.

#anna.txt #a tag for bitching #rape tw / #slavery tw / #one day i'll exhaust everything i have to say on this subject. and then you'll be sorry

[dreamescapeswriting]

Together ~ MYG

WORD COUNT: 3.7k

PAIRING: Yoongi x fem!Reader

GENRE: fluffy, established relationships, arguments, trust-issues, fighting with one another, betrayal, married in secret, @minyoongiownsme

⤜Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - April 2023

⤜MASTERLIST

The man of your dreams was standing across the stage from you as you did your best to pretend as though being this close to one another wasn't sending your heart into overdrive. Over the years of dating Yoongi, you'd become a master at hiding your true feelings for him in public and the same went for him. Both of you were enigmas to the outside world and no one would have known the two of you were dating unless they were close personal friends.

Of course, there had been the odd occasion when rumours were circulating but they were all quickly put the rest leaving your relationship a complete mystery to those around you. Besides close family and friends that were. The rest of Yoongi's members all knew about your relationship since you'd been around them often enough and a few of the idols in the company you worked for knew too but there was one thing only you, Yoongi and the courthouse knew and that was that you were secretly married to one another. It had been almost a month since the two of you decided to get married to one another and you had no regrets - besides not having some family by your side of course but everything else had been perfect.

Since you hadn't told anyone about getting married you hadn't had to worry about making wedding plans. There was no stressing about who was going to sit where and who wasn't going to be able to eat certain foods and all of the different catering to everyone else. It was a stress-free time and something you weren't ever going to regret ever again, Yoongi caught your eye and winked when he knew there were no cameras on him and your whole body flamed. Today the two of you were hosting a live music bank together and watching the final performance take place. After this, you had plans to go home and meet up with Yoongi before he would be staying at his own place for the next week or so. He had filming to do for a behind-the-scenes video, it was him giving a tour of his home and since he couldn't exactly tell everyone he no longer lived there he needed to act the part.

The music died and you took in a deep breath, slowly walking to your spot on the stage beside Yoongi and turning to look up at him as you spoke,

"I remember when I first started training under FYJ and being able to debut was one of the scariest but also most exciting things," You turned toward the camera when it moved closer and smiled as some of the girls came running over to you and Yoongi to do an after performance interview.

"I was so nervous they had to change my outfit about three times if I remember rightly, I was just too anxious and sweating too much." You pouted a little making Yoongi chuckle, he'd heard that story before and every time it made him smile.

"But you ended up great. How do you girls feel after your performance?" Yoongi questioned, handing his mic over to one of the girls in the group and letting them answer some fan questions as well as questions you'd been given on the cards in your hand.

"I'll meet you back at our place, I'll make sure no one is following me," Yoongi stated as you both waited near the back exit of the venue you were at. After your interview with the girl group you'd been let go and sent home, only now the two of you were alone you didn't want to say goodbye to him.

"I'll heat up the blankets and we can get an early night if you want," You looked up at your husband who smirked down at you, wrapping one arm around your waist before pressing your chest against his. 

"I have better plans than an early night," He chuckled as he felt your body heating up against his touch and you whined softly pushing him away before standing up straight and heading for the door.

As soon as the doors open you were met with flashing cameras and tons of people screaming all kinds of questions at you. It wasn't completely unusual for this to happen but the kinds of questions they were asking were.

"When did the two of you decide to get married?!" One reporter screamed while shoving a tape recorder in your line of direction, you stumbled backwards a little knocking into Yoongi who was careful not to let you fall.

"When did you start dating? Is this something to help you out in your career?" Another question shot at you as you looked up at Yoongi for some help. Panic began to bubble inside of your chest as you listened to them firing off questions at you, how had anyone even found out about this? The courthouse had signed an NDA so they were under strict rules not to tell anyone about anything that happened that day.

"Do you have plans to work together in the future?"

"Was this a shotgun wedding? Are you expecting?!" The questions continued to come out as Yoongi helped you toward his car, there was no use both of you trying to leave in separate vehicles when it was quite clear they knew the two of you were together.

"Do you live together?! Are you going to be getting a new house together?!" The questions and shutter sound drowned out the second the door to the car shut and Yoongi turned to look at you. He looked as though he was ready to fight someone for leaking private information while you were busy trying not to cry about everyone finding out about it so suddenly.

"We should go to our managers, it's the only way any of this is going to be resolved," Yoongi said to you but you continued to stare down at the glovebox in complete silence. How were you going to recover from this? You were already under fire from some publication companies, they accused you of only hanging out with certain idols for some attention and some even went as far as to say that the only reason you were making it in the idol world was because of who you were friends with.

"We'll get this sorted, we can either deny it or come out with our heads held high," While Yoongi continued to drive and plan how this was all going to work out you were too busy spiralling into how this was all going to ruin everything you'd built for yourself. There was a very high chance you were going to get fired from FYJ as well as face some tricky business with your contract. Not to mention you were going to have to face a lot of backlash regarding your fans, none of this was going to be easy and all of a sudden it felt as though the world was being swept out from right beneath your feet. 

You couldn't remember the last time you spoke, you didn't remember how you got into the office you were currently sitting in and you certainly didn't remember your manager and the owner of FYJ arriving at the HYBE building you were suddenly being held up in.

"I'm just saying if they'd have come to us before doing something completely idiotic such as this. We could have stopped this from happening," Your manager - Hannah - stated in a matter-a-fact tone, your eyes slowly moved to look at her and you could already tell she was pissed about all of this.

"Idiotic? What's so idiotic about me wanting to marry my girlfriend?" Yoongi placed his hands on the table, ever since both your manager and his own had arrived he'd been battling them alone on this and he stared at you worried. It scared him how quiet you were being and he was beginning to worry you were regretting getting involved with him in the first place.

"You could have come to us. You should have told us this was what you were going to be doing," Seojin said to Yoongi, shaking his head before rubbing the top of his nose and letting out a sigh. All of them were trying to come to terms with what was happening and trying to come up with a plan on how to get on the good side of the media.

"We could tell them it's all a lie," Hannah suggested as she flicked through her phone trying to see what fans thought of the secret marriage. In the time it had taken you and Yoongi to arrive at HYBE there had been photos of your wedding leaked to the press. Someone had taken pictures of the two of you signing your marriage certificate, as well as the ceremony itself. There was no hiding that this was all real, there was no time to try and tell them it was for a music video either.

"We could tell them it was for something they're filming," Seojin stated but you rolled your eyes, taking in a deep breath as you turned your head to look at Yoongi. He was staring at you waiting for you to say anything, to try and help him in this whole thing so you looked down at the table. Slowly you ran your tongue along your bottom lip and shook your head at everything. 

"We should tell them the truth," You stated, slowly looking up at Yoongi but quickly averting your gaze and turning to look at Hannah who was biting her lip.

"We can't say it's a music video, we can't say it's some challenge. It's better to just tell them the truth." You looked to Seojin as Yoongi took your hand in his grasp and squeezed your hand softly, slowly lifting it up to his lips and kissing it. 

"How are you going to handle the backlash? It's not as though your career can really handle it at this point," Hannah stated blankly, she wasn't going to beat around the bush when she knew this could either be the worst thing for you or the best.

"I didn't marry Yoongi to get ahead in my career and as long as we know that, that's all I care about," You shrugged a little and let out a small breath as you tried to think clearly about everything. There was going to be backlash and you needed to be prepared for it all, in the meantime all you wanted to do was hold your husband,

"We'll reschedule the home tour video. Maybe we can get fans interested in seeing your own home," Seojin said before turning to Hannah who was already calling some of the media outlets to try and get a spin on the story.

"Hey, don't go getting quiet on me now," Yoongi said as you both walked through the front door of your shared place you dropped down onto the sofa, running your hands over your face and trying to come to terms with what was happening.

"I didn't want any of this," You whispered and shook your head, you didn't want people to think less of you because you were dating someone and you definitely didn't want someone to accuse you of sleeping your way through the industry which is something you'd seen on the drive home.

"You didn't want to marry me?" Yoongi questioned jumping straight on the defence making you sigh at him, of course, that's not what you were saying.

"I'm saying I didn't want people to accuse me of sleeping with you so I could make it in this life," You scoffed, throwing your phone down onto the table pissed off by what people were saying about you. You never would have imagined something private between husband and wife would lead to this massive fallout. Some fans were okay, they were over the moon about the joining of their two favourite idols coming together but of course, there were a few that were angry about it. Upset with the fact that you were no longer single when a lot of the idol image was for the idols to be there for them to brand on fans wanting to date or to make them seem available. It was what sold in the industry and why a lot of contracts included a dating ban so that they would appeal more to fans around the world. 

"But we know it's not true, you said so. You said us knowing the truth is all you care about," He stated, walking closer to you and reaching his hand out for you only you stepped away and it was as though his heart had just been smashed into billions of pieces.

"Yn," He whispered not trusting himself not to break down if he spoke any louder.

"I just need some space...Being told I'm a slut...Or worse, it hurts Yoongi," You squeaked a little as you felt the tears beginning to roll down your cheeks, quickly swiping them away as Yoongi watched you.

"We don't go through things alone. We fight things together like a husband and wife should," He said slowly, there was no way he was going to leave you alone in this when he could see how badly it was tearing you up inside and he bit his lip.

"Maybe we rushed into it." You rushed out, trying to get him out of the house. You needed to be alone, to cry and wallow in some self-pity for a while you just needed him away from you for a little while.

"You don't mean that," He stuttered a little, looking at you with tears in his eyes. He knew you were upset but he didn't want you to say something you were going to later regret.

"What if I do?" You croaked out, staring at him through bloodshot eyes and shaking your head as you thought about everything. If the two of you had gone through the right channels and been careful with everything none of this would have happened,

"Look, you're not the only one facing a backlash with this. You think people aren't saying cruel things about me?" He didn't raise his voice, not even once he just stared at you and shook his head.

"You're not the only one going through this."

"But I'm the only one with the chance of never recovering. My career is fresh, and fans might never recover from this. You've seen what they've been saying about me. Everyone knows it's always worse for the woman," You mumbled before sighing and looking at Yoongi who just shook his head at you, turning and heading right out of the front door without another word about it. As soon as the door shut you collapsed onto the sofa, crying into your hands as you whimpered. You'd always had a harder time showing your feelings to those around you and it was easier for you to cry when you were alone. 

Days had passed since you'd last been with Yoongi and you'd mostly been laid in your place feeling sorry for yourself. Friends and family had all contacted you to congratulate you on the marriage but you'd mostly sent them straight to voicemail, choosing to ignore them rather than face the problem head-on. Except right now, Jin was standing in your living room and mumbling about you living in filth.

"If Yoongi were here, he'd hate you for this." He mumbled lifting up the dirty clothes from the floor and throwing them into the washing basket that was in the kitchen. When you'd not bothered to call Jin back he decided that enough was enough and he was going to come around and see if there was anything he could do for you.

"Yoongi isn't here so I don't have anything to worry about," You hissed out harshly, you'd been the one to push Yoongi away so you didn't know why you were so surprised about him not being here.

"No. He's not. He's out trying to fix everything while you lay around and do nothing." Jin mumbled at you, sitting you up straight on the sofa and taking away the blankets you'd been using to sleep with before he threw those into the wash.

"It's bad enough you hid it from me. ME! Your best fucking friend!" Jin yelled out dramatically doing his best to make you smile but seeing that it wasn't exactly working he sighed and shook his head at you.

"Turn the news on," He ordered before starting to take care of the rubbish that was inside the living room. You'd practically been living in the living room, only leaving when you needed to get clean clothes or to use the bathroom since you saw no use using the huge bed you shared with Yoongi when he wasn't there to share it with you.

"Why? Are they running another article about me being a bad person?" You weren't stupid, you'd seen the coverage about you only being with Yoongi for the popularity and it had been soul-destroying to you. You thought you'd have been able to handle it but it hurt knowing that's what people truly thought about you all this time.

"Just turn it on," Jin called from the bathroom before you heard him pottering around in the kitchen, you knew there was no use fighting with him since he wasn't going to drop anything until you did as you were told.

"Today we're joined by someone very special and we're spreading a warm welcome to him," You frowned at the newscaster before the camera panned to the seat beside her and Yoongi was standing there. Your mouth ran dry and suddenly your heart was in your throat and you could barely feel it beating. What was he doing on national TV?

"Thank you, I'm both happy and saddened to be here today," He explained, looking into the camera with a weakened smile and you felt your chest deflate at the sight of him doing this alone. You knew that HYBE were more than likely making him make a public statement and if you'd been stronger they would have made you join his side.

"I'm here today despite the disliking from my manager and company." Your heart was back to beating rapidly in your chest as you swallowed dryly shaking your head. There was no way he was going against company policy to do something like this,

"It's come to my attention that my marriage to my wife is under extreme scrutiny without reason. People are acting callously toward my wife and I will no longer stand back and allow it to happen," Tears began to well up in your eyes to the point where everything began to blur and you struggled to see the screen.

"Yn, I made a mistake walking away a couple of days ago and this is how I'm going to fix things. We're supposed to face our struggles together and I plan on doing that, every day for the rest of our lives." He spoke so clearly, you were already standing up and hunting around for your phone desperate to let him know you were going to be here too. 

"I'll see you soon, I love you." He said again before the camera panned back to the newsreader who was already tearing up and thanking him for coming onto the show to speak to everyone.

"Yoongi," You sobbed into his shoulder as he continued to hold onto you, his arms around your waist tightly as you cried into his neck and he sighed happily.

"I've missed you." He told you before kissing your shoulder, bringing you tighter to him as you sniffled a little, 

"I missed you too. I'm so sorry I pushed you away," You pulled away to look at him and you could see the bags under his eyes. It was clear he hadn't been sleeping properly and you hated that you'd been the one to cause all of this.

"Every step of the way, I'm here." You promised as he took your hand in his and squeezed it softly. Both of you were standing in the porchway inside of your house with a whole media circus outside waiting for you to comment on some things. You'd been avoiding it for so long that it was about time you made a full official statement and showed the world that no matter what they said none of it would matter.

"Good, because I'm getting shit from the boys for them not being invited," He told you making you giggle a little, your heart picking up as you thought about the boys rambling at him for not coming to the small wedding you had.

"Hoseok is insisting we have a small party with everyone, I'll see if I can get us out of it-"

"Don't. Let's do it. We can have our friends and family around us as we celebrate our marriage." You whispered, pressing your lips to his cheek and smiling at him as he nodded at you shyly pulling you back into his arms and relaxing a little.

"Let's go out and face this, together." You whispered before wiping your eyes and trying to make yourself seem a little more presentable before stepping out in front of all of the cameras out there.

The media had died down after a while, allowing your relationship with Yoongi to be smooth sailing once again. Though there were the occasional articles trying to claim you were only with him for fame but they were quickly removed or even shut down by your managers. Some were even sued if they were spreading anything harmful toward the two of you. The boys were also very happy that you let them throw you a small party to celebrate your marriage, though they'd made you both wear something as though it was a wedding and made you exchange your vows in front of everyone, all in all, it had been a perfect day and night.

Tagline: @millenniumspec @chiisaiblog @rjsmochii @tinyoonsblog @sw33tnight @taestannie @cherrybubblesandvodka @army24--7 @acciocriativity @mitzwinchester @heyjiminnie @halesandy @jin-from-the-block @aerastus @namjooningelsewhere @ratherbfangirling @psychosupernatural @lyoongx @periandernyx @laylasbunbunny @royallyjjk @critssq @lenfilms @btsiguess-kpop @meowmeowisdaname @imafivestarkpopstan​

#bts #bts x reader #bts imagine #bts imagines #min yoongi #yoongi #yoongi x reader #yoongi imagine #yoongi imagines #min yoongi x reader #min yoongi imagine #min yoongi imagines #suga #suga x reader #suga imagine #suga imagines

[penvisions]

return the favor {chapter 22}

Pairing: Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Smuggler! Reader || M! OC x Pre Boston QZ! Reader (flashback scenes)

Summary: Memories often spring up at the worst of times, but as you continue to travel alone there's not much else to occupy your mind.

Word Count: 3.5k

Warnings: minor character death, m! oc death, canon typical violence, canon typical language, cursing, insult, sexual content, non con, allusions to non con sexual advances, allusions to p in v, unprotected p in v that results in pregnancy, kissing, pregnancy, symptoms of pregnancy, mentions of nausea but no vomiting, allusions to child loss, fighting, blood, reader gets injured, joel gets injured, guns, gun violence, self-depreciating internal monologue, if i left anything out pls lemme know!

A/N: trying something new with this chapter, i hope it reads well! thank you to everyone who participated in the poll for the next few chapters of this fic! this one is a little shorter, but the next one will be a doozy. my mind is a little overwhelmed with school and tutoring and four different WIPS

ao3 link || series masterlist || main masterlist || ko-fi

Joel was trying.

He was trying to tamp down the anxiety he knew would thrum in his veins the second the gates of Jackson closed behind him. Back out in the unknown and unpredictable landscape. Winter was granting him a passive day, no snow, no biting wind, cloud coverage clear for the sky to shine a light blue to crystal clear you would think it was a brisk summer day. But the pause in extreme weather aside from the near freezing temperature did nothing to quell the pulse beneath his skin.

He was alone, traveling with a teenager he had come to care about in a dangerous way.

The journey had been meant to be made with Tess, first. Strong-willed, no-nonsense saint of a woman for taking what he could offer her and not asking for anything in return. Just wanting to share space and renown within a controlled setting that allowed for them to execute their runs and make what passed for a decent living back in what was left of the quarantine zones. To share their bodies when human nature sparked connection in the oldest and most instinctual of ways. She had turned an eye to his abuse of the very same things they traded for food, for water, for supplies for their shabby apartment that had seen far better days before they stepped foot inside.

Then journey was then meant to be made with you. A surprise in the moments after her death. Skilled in many things and willing to help a man suddenly saddled with a teenager he had no clue how to interact with. But he had, once upon a time. The situation tasting of irony and self-destruction. Selfless to the point of disembarking on your own path in the wake of his own attempt at running when faced with something too real for the world. Maybe in the Before times, it would have worked out. Perhaps a meet cute as he delivered his brother to an urgent care for a drunken blunder, a work accident he himself fell victim to, or a begged visit for Sarah should she had fallen off her bike or taken a tumble in soccer practice. Maybe then it would have been given life, hopeful glances and lingering touches that would have turned into nervous dates. Nervous dates that would give way to regular familiarity and then heated nights beneath sheets of his bed.

But it had never should’ve blossomed in the now, in the after. And yet, it had tried.

Ellie was mad. She wasn’t trying.

Not the first day at least.

Speaking when spoken to, ire and hurt flaring uncomfortably in moments he could sense weren’t aimed at him. At least not completely. Aimed at you, for going back on your word. Something you wouldn’t have had to do if he hadn’t screwed up so monumentally by falling for you. He had been wrong in his accusations, throwing the proposition you made to him all those days ago back in your face. Like you had forced yourself on him, forced him into thinking of you that way, of wanting you that way. But it had been him, his decision to take you up on it in his grief. Wanting to feel something other than the gaping hole that seemed to eat up more and more of him as the years went by.

But instead of just taking his body in the ways he allowed you to, you had also begun to heal that black hole he was made up of. Slowly and so minimally at a time that he hadn’t noticed until it was too late.

He stopped and made the time to teach her how to shoot the rifle, hoping it would help to bring her out of her shell. And it worked, he silently thanked the universe, it worked. She was cracking jokes and quipping like normal. Mirth lighting up her eyes and questions flowing from her. And he indulged them, as best he could. Telling her of how he supported himself before the world fell apart. About how he always dreamed of singing and making music.

But just as everything seemed to be on the mend, it was broken once again.

With the crack of a wooden bat.

“A-Angelo?” You voice was as shaky as your reaching hands, fingers brushing against the man’s face only a few steps away. He was older, that much was certain. Only a year apart back then, back when the world functioned in an entirely different way. Only a year apart, but two decades of time separating you now, turned into completely different people. A wave of emotions at finding your family by pure chance and circumstance in the wilds of a state you had never been to before while on your way to look for them hit hard. You both surged forward and embraced, the man’s arms coming around you and tightening.

“I thought it was you, the hair,” He choked out, deep voice cracking. He was so broad, tall frame looming over you, developed fully into a man who had survived the worst of nature and humanity. Just as you had grown into a woman who took nothing of ill nature aimed at you, taking the things that had happened to you and using it as a foundation to be stronger.

“It’s me, I’m okay.” You gripped his shoulders tight, pushing him back a little to look him over.

“No injuries, no bites, you’re okay?”

“Yes, yes, I’m okay….We both are.”

That’s when your mind decided to remind you of the other voice you heard, the feminine one.

A young girl, no more than her teens and far too skinny was half concealed behind a tree trunk a few yards away. Her eyes were brown, honey brown and beautiful and they reminded you of so many people lost to space and time. They shown just as Taylor’s had done, once upon a time. Like you had both talked of wishing to see on a bright new, chubby face…

“Oh.” The phantom jolt of a kick felt through the skin of your aunt’s stomach so many years ago sprung to life in the palm of your hand. “Oh, Angelo. I’m-I’m so sorry.”

He detached from you, taking a few steps toward the girl, now in between you both equally. He held out a hand to her, his gloves tattered and stitching frayed in certain places.

“It’s okay, she’s okay. She’s family.”

“You’re so beautiful,” You gently coached her out, hoping nice words would help her to feel safe. “I’ve never met you, but I’ve waited a very long time to. You- you can call me by my name or Bean, if you’d like?”

“This is our cousin, from mom’s side. Do you remember her saying that we needed to go East?”

A small nod, wide eyes taking in the situation.

“It was to find her. She’s good, smart, she can help keep us alive.”

“You’ve been doing good on your own.” She didn’t move, not taking a step to back away and put distance between you nor toward you in a hesitant greeting. Her wide brown eyes were alert, telling of the things she’d experienced and been witness to. Of how cautious she was in the face of new people, a good thing to be but completely unwarranted in this particular case.

“Yes, but…Adela, we…we need help. This season, it’s harsh and we don’t know this land as well.”

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, I know we’re practically strangers but we are related. I know that doesn’t mean much these days to some people, but it means a great deal to me. I will do everything in my power to protect you, just like your brother.”

Hours later, after a shared meal and an introduction of your gifted appaloosa, camp was made and secured. Adela was fast asleep, one of the blankets you had tucked underneath the saddle wrapped around her small frame inside her sleeping bag. Light snoring sounding from the bundle she made against the horse.

“We’re the only ones that made it.” Angelo said before you could even figure out how to ask after everyone. Outbreak day a rather taboo subject amongst those that survived it. For Joel, at least, for you it was easier to divulge but still not a light subject to talk about. You had been willing with Ellie, with Maria.  The first to quell her curious questions, to allow her another perspective on the events before her time that shaped the world into the one that she knew. The second to appeal to her, to connect with someone who felt comfortable.

“We didn’t know anything was going on for a while, you know how it is working in a ware. house all day. But when I got home that evening, apparently grandma had passed during the morning. Scared the hell out of everyone when she came sprinting into the living room and lunged at dad.”

“I…I can’t imagine, I’m so sorry. I know I had a missed call from the house that day, but I had been running late. And then, you know….”

“It’s okay,” One of his gloved hands reached out, taking the closest one of yours and squeezing. “We both made it, Adela made it. I love our family and cared so much for everyone, but this world is too harsh for them. It was always going to be us and that’s the only comfort I have in what happened.”

Silently agreeing, you squeezed his hand back. He was right, your grandparents had softened in their age, his parents and your father caring for them together. Soft in their endearment too, not suited for a life of constant unrest, of constant fear and paranoia. Of scrounging for food and basic supplies, having to defend what was yours by any means necessary.  

“I was traveling with a man from Boston QZ and a girl, we were trying to find her family out this way. The last lead would’ve taken us to the University of Eastern Colorado.” You admitted over dinner the next day, having taught Adela the basics of how to properly interact with a horse, how to climb up in the saddle. While she was tall, she was skinny. Alarmingly so, but Angelo assured you that he always made sure she had enough to eat. He was willing to go without to provide for her, to ensure her still growing body had as much as it needed, or close to it at least.

“We were just there,” He took a breath, savoring the smell of the coffee that you had brewed for him as you all settled around the fire for the night. Scraps of foil that had contained easy, portioned meals to through on the fire that Maria had provided you with. “Well, around there. We came across a group of people settled into an old lodge town. Not to far from the city actually.”

Something about the man’s tone had you delaying your questions until Adela had laid down to rest for the night, tired from the day of interaction. But she was warming up to you, a familiar comfortability between you both as you talked to her about her mother. She admitted quietly that Angelo wasn’t willing to talk about their parents, people she had never had the chance to meet. The chaos of Outbreak day and those following it too much for him to talk about.

“We-uh, we left the group pretty quickly.” The man cleared his throat, turning around to ensure that his little sister was indeed asleep and not feigning it in order to eavesdrop. “The leader, god – what was his name? It doesn’t matter, he was so nice at first. Preaching about how people need to stick together, that his flock chose him to lead them and look after them.”

Your heart sank to your stomach, religious fanatics always putting you on edge. The way they manipulated the words of the bible in order to further their own agenda. And the way Angelo described him as initially nice and welcoming. A ploy, a trap laid out to ensnare people.

“But the first morning there, he came to visit us in the small set up they provided us with. Asked Adela to go out on a walk with him while I was still asleep. She hadn’t wanted to go, but felt obligated. Like he was just going to give her a tour or somethin’ and it was harmless, ya know?”

The rush of blood in your ears was loud, but you strained against it, needing to hear the words coming from the man beside you.

“He- that motherfucker, he exposed himself to her. Said that if she wanted to stay and use their resources that she needed to earn her keep. She begged me to leave right that second, to gather our stuff and make a run for it. But I don’t her we needed to act like nothing happened, to wait until nightfall and take what we could. So we did….but if you said you were traveling with a girl…brown hair, short, scar in her eyebrow?”

“Yes.” You breathed out, body thrumming with fear. No….no…there was no way Ellie could’ve been taken by the same men. She wouldn’t willingly go with anyone, had been hesitant to even let you or Joel out of her sight for too long….That meant…Joel had to have been injured in order for them to steal her away from him.

“She was unconscious, they were…they were carrying her into the settlement.”

Your head shot up, drink spilling over your hands cupped around the thermos.

“No.” You stood, hands steady despite the flood of emotions raging around in your mind. “No, no, no. I know those people, without them I wouldn’t have made it back out this way. We traveled from the other coast.”

It was late, but you didn’t care. You were gathering everything you needed, your pack and half of the food supply.

Adela roused at the noise, springing up and reaching for your hands.

“No, please, don’t leave us. We’ve lost too much already.” Tears were in her wide eyes, tugging at your heart in more ways than one. You crouched down in front of her, clasping your gloved hands around her own. Giving her your undivided attention.

“Honey, please, listen to me. I’m- I – I don’t want to leave you two, but I have to. Please understand. The girl that you saw, that was…she’s important to me. And she needs my help. I’ll see you again, I promise. I swear to you, Adela, I will see you again. Behind the walls of Jackson, we can…we can have a life there.”

Standing, you pulled her into a tight embrace.

“I’ll tell you embarrassing stories about your brother from when we were little.”

Pulling the map from your pocket, you circled the spot for Jackson with a marker.

“Here, this map will get you back to a settlement. Jackson. It’s large, has walls, it works. Ask for Maria or Tommy, tell them my name and that I sent you. Tell them you’re my family, you are. Take this,” You moved to wrap your old coat you had draped over your lap over the small frame of the girl and push the map that would lead them back to Jackson in the man’s hands.

The man surged up and gripped you tight in a bear hug, his body wrapped completely around you like he would do ever since he had begun to tower over you as children.

“Please, be safe!”

“Seek refuge in Jackson. I’ll return there, I promise.” You urged as you mounted the horse, reigns tight in your hands.

You clicked your tongue and tugged hard, urging the horse forward. The sound of hooves beating on the frozen ground was the only sound in the quiet, frozen night.

The remains of the a few bodies were scattered about the derelict campus that had been the destination sought out by them. Joel and Ellie. Those you were searching for nowhere to be seen, only hints of them in the bullet casings, the torn-up dirt, a bat broken in half- the jagged ends of one piece soaked in a deep red stain of blood. Joel’s, if your cousin’s words and your spiraling thoughts were correct.

Internally cursing at the man for pulling it out, for not waiting for a better moment, for not thinking in the haze his mind must’ve been.

Just as you began to trace the trail of rather fat droplets, you heard the crunch of someone stepping on fallen leaves behind you. Before you could even turn around completely to face them, someone was wrapping their arms around your neck, cutting off your air.

Your last thought was of Angelo and Adela. Of Joel and Ellie.

‘It was hot. Sweltering. And your dress was too tight over your swollen middle. It was a small bump, barely visible from the front, more so from the side. You had thought you indulged in too much food one evening after a deer had been caught but the teasing jab soon delved into something more serious. Especially when the swelling hadn’t gone down in the following days and nausea became a morning ritual.

You had been ecstatic, a first for you. And exciting thing you had always wanted. A faint thought you hadn’t entertained even in a working world, a notion you hadn’t thought possible at all with the demise of the world. When you had told him, Taylor had shared in your excitement, immediately beginning to hoard everything he could loot from the nearby state park. Gathering everything you could use, whether it was to repurpose it or store it for the future.

You had found a pocket of happiness and security in the rubble of the world, hidden deep in the forests of Tennessee in the form of a man who welcomed you into his space when all you had wanted to do was run. Finding yourself injured and needing aid, he had offered it to you.

What had begun as a small stay to ensure you would heal okay, that your stitches were secure and wouldn’t pull. But the conversations that flowed from one to another over those first few days tied you to each other. Braiding together your futures in such a wonderful way. There was no way to know how badly the universe would fray the untethered strings.

The only consolation was that the nights were cooler, the evenings and mornings twinged with a chill that signaled the end of an unseasonable warm fall. But as time moved on, Taylor had pleaded with you to consider staying close to the cabin. You had agreed, the symptoms of your pregnancy making it hard to do much of anything for long. Hunting and patrolling far too much for you to handle at the moment.

You were tending to the horses when he appeared behind you, arms snaking around your shoulders. The tickling of his facial hair sprouting giggles from you. The horses snickered, sharing in your delight. After securing them back in the modest stable, large hands were wrapping around you and sweeping you off of your tired feet.

“C’mon, princessa, let’s go have a nap.”

“But I don’t wanna,” You whined, not wanting to waste the sunshine while it was still showing, winters notoriously gray and overcast in this part of the region. The looming mountains casting dark shadows over pockets of land. Thankfully the cabin wasn’t in one of those regions, hidden well by the tall trees and stained a dark green all along the roof to avoid searching eyes to those at a higher altitude.

“Who said we were gonna sleep, silly girl?” Taylor swooped down to kiss you fully on the lips. Stirring warmth in your core. With a deep laugh at the chasing of your lips after his, he carefully rushed up the stairs and through the front door. “I’m gonna devour you, you’re too good looking a snack to leave untouched.”

“Oh hush,” You curled your hands into the long hair he had tied into a bun at the back of his head. Taking the band from around it and causing the strands to cascade around his handsome face.

“Glowing and full of me, carrying our baby in your pretty little tummy. Good god, you’re constantly on my mind, princessa, you’re my entire world.”

“And you’re mine, mi amor.”

Bubbling giggles flowed through the cabin as he made his way up the stairs and through the small landing. Into the bedroom that you found happiness in the midst of the fallen world.’

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dividers by the lovely @saradika-graphics

taglist: @furiousmushroom@sawymredfox @ayamenimthiriel @bookloverkat @rosaaeles @narcissa-anastasia @littlemisspascal @oscarissac2099 @ghostwritesthings @76bookworm76 @elli3williams @sarap-77 @christinamadsen @vivian-pascal @dugiioh

#dev writes #fic: return the favor #tlou #tlou fic #tlou fanfiction #tlou fanfic #the last of us #joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfic #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #ellie williams #platonic ellie williams

[scekrex]

Hurt/comfort anyone? 😌

We all know Adam's "big and tough" act, how he gloats before anyone that he's the absolute best since he's the og dick and he's the reason the rest of the mankind was created, but what about Adam just being Adam like anytime else, especially the scene in court and Sera just talking his ear off about him acting irresponsibly and just revealing the exterminations to everyone in the worst way possible, just giving him a good ol' talk, but not in a nice way, nope. She crushes his ego in a way before leaving him alone in the room, saying she has stuff to attend and he's just standing there, all deflated and his mask glitching from how many conflicted feelings fly over his face, he's resignated, he's even sad a bit, but also angry. At Sera, at Heaven, God even, but mostly at himself since he knows he fucked up another thing in his life that he was trusted with.

He goes back home to unsuspecting of anything reader and just passes by him, not saying a word, even tho reader tried to greet him and hug him, but was unable to since Adam just brushed past him quickly. There was a heavy air surrounding reader's husband and he grew concerned, so he went to check up on him, seeing Adam just curled up on the bed, wrapped up in his own wings, shielding himself away from the world, not a sound coming out of him, but reader knew something shitty happened and just gets behind him, hugging him tightly and gently petting his wings, not saying a word to let Adam calm down and speak when he's comfortable enough to do so. Adam just smashing himself into reader and asking quietly if he was actually so bad at everything that he didn't deserve anything good in his life, if that was why everyone he cared about before left him and even now no body cares in the slightest bit about his existence. Basically just Adam having an existential crisis and reader being his anchor, trying to tell and show him how it actually is and not what his mind is telling him.

This sad, wet cat bitch needs validation and love like no one before 😞🤘

Muah ❤️

Adam might be an insecure piece of shit underneath all that narcissistic bullshit act of his but he's my insecure piece of shit and I love him.

If I'm so wonderful then why am I so misunderstood

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language, hurt (with comfort)

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

“Adam,” the older seraphim raised her voice against the first man loudly, it echoed through her office with much more power than the first man had expected it to, he flinched a little at her tone, his wings dropping to their lowest. “Sera, I-” Adam wanted to explain, wanted to turn it into the stupid joke it had been, but the older seraphim had enough of it. She had enough of Adam, she had enough of his behavior and she was about to let him know. “You’re behavior is no longer accepted by us,” she started what would turn into a monologue, Adam made himself appear a little smaller at her words. “You walk on heaven's holy ground, eat the food our Father provides and whenever someone does not show you respect, your first argument is that you're the first human,” all of the things Sera had listed were true, well they had been the most obvious ones but that didn't make them less true. “And yet you behave like one of them sinners,” that however caught Adam's attention. He was what? How dare she insult him like that, he was very much not acting like a sinner. Or was he?

“You walk heaven's streets with curses on your lips, you dirtied your own purity by sleeping with so many women and men, you behave like a total child and don't know when to stop and where to draw the line and I personally am under the impression that we let your behavior slide for way too long,” she stared Adam in the eyes, giving the first man the most serious look he had ever gotten from the seraphim. The brunette lowered his head in defeat, Sera had often given him shit for being too loud, too much of this, too much of that, she had told him he wasn't behaving like the pure first human should - but it wasn't Adam's fault, not really, because how was he supposed to behave ‘normal’ when God had given him two wives just to take them from him again when he was alive? How was he supposed to fit in and act like everyone else when all that would bring him would be pain?

“Maybe divine judgment failed you. Maybe you should have ended up in hell amongst the other sinners. Father certainly wouldn't have liked it, not after Lucifer's fall, but it would have been the correct decision.” And that made Adam crumble into pieces - at least mentally. Because deep down inside he knew she was right, that no angel other than him dared to stain the name of the Father above, no other angel dared to behave as reckless and merciless as he and his exorcists did. And yes, no other angel than him had slept with so many women and men - a thing he used to be proud of. Before he had met you, before you had become his lover, before he had committed himself to you and only you. Before you, he had been different.

She smoothened out her hair, straightened her back and looked down at Adam, “I have to attend an important meeting. You shall leave and overthink your actions, Adam.” And with that she left him there, leaving him as she had shattered not only his ego but the last piece of confidence he had held inside of him. It took the brunette a while to realize that Sera was not coming back to comfort him, to tell him that she had been too harsh, why should she? She was right after all, Adam was a horrible person, he knew that, had known it ever since.

-

When the door to your shared apartment opened and Adam walked through it, you were quick to get up and greet him with a warm hug, expecting your boyfriend to be just as excited to see you as you were to see him. But he wasn't, in fact he didn't even look at you as he crossed the living room in order to get to the bedroom, no ‘sup babes’, no ‘Fuck I've missed ya stupid ass' no fucking nothing. The tips of his feathers were dragging on the floor as he walked, a sign that something wasn't right - Adam always made sure that not a single inch of his beloved wings was touching the dirty ground, even in your apartment. The brunette clearly wasn't in the mood to talk, yet you went after him to let him know that he wasn't alone, that you were there no matter what was wrong.

You opened the bedroom door quietly and what you saw shattered your heart. Adam was laying on the bed, his body looked like a ball made out of feathers, he had curled in on himself, his wings shielded him from all of reality, from whatever was hurting him right now. Yet you saw how his body shook, the first man was crying.

Wordlessly you closed the door behind you, trying to do so as quietly as possible. Then you walked over to the bed and cuddled up behind him, one of your hand gently found its way into his hair, petting it just the way you knew he liked it whenever he was feeling upset about something, the other hand of yours smoothened out the feathers covering his wings, gently rubbed the little gap between where the wings grew out of his back - you were very aware how sensitive that area of the angelic body was given that you yourself had experienced it before.

For you it was ridiculously hard to keep quiet, you wanted to talk to him, wanted to ask what was upsetting him so much, why he was crying, what there was for you to do to make it better, but you didn't. You remained quiet, Adam had made it clear that he preferred not talking about it at the moment - or maybe he simply found himself unable to do so, you weren't quite sure which was the case but either way you respected it.

A small smile appeared on your face as the brunette leaned into your touch, he tilted his head backwards, sad, puffy and reddened eyes watched you as you continued to pet his hair without a single comment, if Adam wanted to talk, you would listen. If Adam wanted to stay quiet and enjoy your presence in silence you were fine with that as well. For you it simply was important that the first man knew he wasn't alone. You were there to provide comfort and a safe space he desperately seemed to need.

“Am I as fucking terrible as people tell me I am?” there it was again, his unnecessary cursing, fuck Sera had been right. He rolled himself over, buried his face in your neck and pressed his body against your own. Your body warmth calmed his nerves, made his mind quiet down for even just the tiniest moment, but it did cause it to quiet down. “Is that why I only have Lute and you left? Because I'm fucking terrible? Because I don't deserve damn good things to happen to me?” his voice was really just a whisper yet you understood every word perfectly fine, even if it was mumbled against your skin. Your hands remained on the gap between his wings and in his hair, giving Adam the stability he craved. He needed someone to cling onto, he was too unstable to hold himself together so you did that for him. “No,” your voice was soft and warm, yet serious, it caused Adam to blink in confusion. “I don't deserve you,” was the next thing he said, and that was where you drew the line, you gently tilted his head upwards, then placed a soft, loving kiss onto his lips, “Bullshit Adam, you're wonderful and I love you.” “But I’m not. I curse a-fucking-lot, I can't keep shit together, for fucks sake I can't even do the simple things like telling you I fucking love you every day.” And yes, that was true, but that didn't cause you to love him any less, if anything it was things you loved about him especially. “I don't care about all of that, I still love you.” “Will you leave me too? Like Eve? Like Lilith? Once you finally fucking find someone better?” You shook your head lightly, placed another kiss onto his forehead, your lips kept resting against his skin as you spoke, “No, dummy. To me there's no one better than you are. You're the best for me and you'll always be.” Adam didn't answer you.

He clung onto you even tighter, wrapped his wings around you and held you close. He didn't believe you, simply couldn't, not after what Sera had said. But at the same time the first man trusted you with his existence, so why would you lie to him? His inner conflict was silenced as you pulled him into another gentle kiss. You couldn't help but hum a soothing melody, “You’ve already changed so much, so many things you've done,” you felt as Adam's eyes fell shut and as his body relaxed underneath your touch. “So many songs you've sung, and in the end, they will still hold their grudge,” you felt him nuzzle against your skin, felt how his breath evened out. “There’s something I've been dying to say, more than anything,” you smiled as you sang the last part, feeling Adam's fingers digging in your skin as he tried to pull you even closer - not that it was nearly enough though. “More than anything, need you to know I love you more than anything.” The first man pressed a sloppy, lazy kiss against your jaw before he fell asleep, from his lips fell a quiet, “More than anything.”

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x male reader #male reader #adam x y/n #adam x reader #adam x you

[moderndaylestat]

I MET SAM!!! AGAIN!!!

Yesterday was a fever dream. I didn’t think I’d get to see him let alone talk to him but it happened! Here’s the whole story:

@suikamelon6 found some info saying the base camp for the Newsreader filming has been set up. I decided to go check it out after work since my office isn’t very far away. It was raining all day and I had no clue if Sam was even filming that day but I decided to take the chance anyway. And I’m SO glad I did!! turns out Sam was filming and I found out the actual filming location (it was a completely different place from the base camp). I made my way there.

They were mainly filming inside a venue so I couldn’t see anything, but there was going to be an outdoor scene too so I stuck around. I was there for around 15mins and then a crew member came over to tell me that Sam and Anna would be arriving soon. Then a car pulled up right in front of where i was standing on the street and Sam was inside!!!!! Thank god I was given a heads up beforehand because otherwise l would’ve had a complete meltdown if Sam in full costume just got out of a car right in front of me 😭

I said hi and Sam looked at me like he recognised me and was like “you were at the Newsreader premiere!” HE RECOGNISES ME!!!! he knows who i am!!!! This is the best thing that’s ever happened to me!!! Anyways, I asked for a photo and he said yes as long as I don’t post it until the season is out. We took some selfies and i’m short so he bent down to fit in the photo 😂😂 I’m sorry that I can’t share the pics yet because OH MY GOD HE LOOKED SO FUCKING GOOD!! He was in full costume, Dale wig and all. He was ✨glowing✨ !!!

He then filmed inside the venue and in the meantime i met up with Suika and another friend as we waited for the outdoor shoot. It was a short scene of just Sam, it was done in 4-5 takes and we saw the whole thing! He was so focused during the entire shoot, it was evident that he puts a lot of thought, effort and concentration into his acting.

Afterwards we talked to Sam some more. He’s so down to earth and easy to talk to! For someone who’s supposedly introverted he’s actually very chatty, he jokes around and makes you feel at ease. It’s like talking to a good friend! I asked him if he’s going to the Newsreader event on the Gold Coast and he said he’s not sure yet and then he was like “wait, are you going?” Gold Coast is like a 2hr flight away from Melbourne, it’s kinda far! I said “I’ll go if you go” and he was like “haha you can just see me here”. He’s so right, i’d much rather not spend all that money on flights and accommodation if I can just keep seeing him in my hometown.

Anyways ahhhh Sam is so lovely and engaging in conversation! And so humble and hardworking too! He grabbed food immediately after he stopped filming, he probably didn’t get to eat between takes. i was like “you must be exhausted” and he just shrugged and smiled. What a sweetheart!!!!!

I had such a wonderful experience, Sam was amazing and all crew members were incredibly lovely, telling us where to go and what was happening. I had the time of my life!! Forever grateful to my crazy good luck about being at the right place at the right time. Sadly I didn’t take any pics of the set, I didn’t want to get in trouble. Maybe next time they film in public (IF there is a next time!!) i will have more pics and things to share with you! 🥰

#sam reid #the newsreader #dale jennings #interview with the vampire #lestat de lioncourt #iwtv

[pearbunny]

the bucket list ✘ [one]

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summary: Fly to Korea. Check. Buy a bouquet of flowers for a stranger. Check. Have said stranger come along with you to accomplish your bucket list? Well that wasn’t on the list, but falling in love was. 

pairing: han jisung x afab!reader

genre: 18+ [MDNI] strangers to lovers, non idol au, crack, mostly fluff, later chapters to include: angst, comfort, smut.

general warnings:  tourist!mc, adult themes including but not limited to: suggestive content, nudity, cursing, mentions of death in later chapters, eventual smut. 

word count: ~3.6k 

chapter content: mentions of food, excessive lip biting as a nervous habit, cafe employee!seungmin, stranger danger tbh don’t be like o/c, Lee Know mentioned, but not present. 

author’s note: I've never written for stray kids and most of what i write is typically on the sadder side so fluff isn't my strongest point but i've had this in my head for awhile. feedback, reblogs, likes, v much appreciated. :) updates will be sporadic, but i'm aiming for once every two weeks.

You shield your eyes from the beating sun above, pupils unadjusted from being on a plane for the past 12 plus hours with the window shut. You let go of the suitcase you had been dragging along behind you to fish your phone out of your back pocket. Humming to yourself, you check the map, trying to find your way to Seoul. “Ah!” You say into the air, which grants you a couple of curious and annoyed stares. You duck your head in an attempt to be unseen, embarrassed by the attention. You make your way to the train station and purchase a ticket. It doesn’t take long for the train to arrive, and soon you’re sitting with your backpack in your lap and your suitcase between your legs.

According to the tourist guide you had pulled up on your phone, the train ride would take around 40 minutes. In the meantime, you rummage through your backpack to look for an old loosely bound book. You find it after digging past your makeup bag and some snacks you had saved from the flight. With a hum, you search through the pages, and after some flipping, you land on the correct one. Your index finger traces down a list, and randomly you stop it. “Buy a bouquet for a stranger.” 

You chew on your lip, a habit you picked up whenever you found yourself feeling uneasy. You may not bethe most outgoing person, but you aren't completely against socializing. 

It’s just … going up to a stranger in a town– let alone country– you’ve never been in was 1000% terrifying. 

Before you know it, the intercom announces your stop and you're scrambling to gather your belongings. You make your way out of the station and suddenly, you hold your breath in awe at the scene in front of you. There were so many people, walking in every direction. You hear little tidbits of their conversations: where they were planning to go for lunch, the new restaurant that opened up in Itaewon, what someone’s boyfriend had given them for their 100 days. The sounds of a city fill your ears. 

If you're being honest, it was a little overwhelming. For a moment, you have doubts of why you had gotten on that plane. You shut your eyes and count down from 7. There, your breathing is even, your head’s a little clearer, and you realize that you had a goal to accomplish. You couldn't back out now, you refuse to be stuck in your old ways.

‘Flowers first,’ you think to yourself. 

After a couple of blocks of lugging your suitcase behind you, you find a quaint little flower stand. A young woman and what seem to be her grandfather were the owners of the stall. You stand there, staring at all the options. The young woman approaches you, her hands placed inside the pockets of her green apron, “Hi, do you need help picking something out?” 

“Hi, yes!” you quickly blurt out. “I just wanted a bouquet that would make someone’s day.” You give the woman a meek smile. You recognize the characters on her apron to read Minji.

“Is this for anyone special? Your mom, maybe?” She starts to pull at a couple of arrangements, one bouquet made of mostly carnations. 

You shake your head, “No…” You hesitate as you wondered to yourself, ‘Do I tell her it’s for someone I don’t even know?’ You chuckle at the thought absentmindedly.

Minji takes that to mean something else, “A boy perhaps then?” There's something a little suggestive in her tone, complemented by the raise of her brow in your direction. 

“Oh, no no!” You shake your head for emphasis, furiously denying it. “Absolutely nothing like that.” You find yourself laughing at the predicament. “I’m actually going to give the flowers to a stranger.”

“Oh–�� Minji looks pleasantly surprised, “That’s very kind of you. I have just the thing then.” 

You stay in place while Minji goes to the other side of the flower stall to wrap up the bouquet she hand picked. Soon, she comes back and you make an expression of gratitude. “Minji, you really didn’t have to do that! I could have just gotten one of the premade ones.” You pout, looking through the flowers as you take the bouquet from her. It was very simple, three medium sunflowers, some Queen Anne’s lace, and a few branches of baby blue eucalyptus.

“No, don’t worry about it. What was your name again?”

“Y/N”, You give her the appropriate amount of money. 

“Well, Y/N, I hope you brighten someone’s day!” Minji smiles at you and bids you farewell as you turn and leave. 

“Now who do I give this to?” You hold the bouquet in one hand while you pull your luggage, the sound of its wheels on the concrete trailing behind you. 

You stop at an intersection, scanning the crowd for someone that seems approachable. Will it be the middle aged woman holding the hand of a small boy while they cross the street? Maybe it would be the man in a suit that was on the phone, oh he was looking in your direction. He glared at you. 

Okay, so not that guy. 

You were about to give up until you spot a young man, about your age give or take a few, walking in your direction. He was still crossing the street, but he had a certain pep to his step, like he was listening to a really good song in his headphones– which given the fact that he did have headphones on, he probably was. He seems approachable, even down to his outfit: white tee loosely tucked into black jeans a black belt to match his shoes, and gold metal thinly rimmed glasses. 

“Um, excuse me!” You step towards him, holding the bouquet of flowers to your chest at first. 

“Yes?” The man stops in front of you and stretches one side of his headphones away from his ear to hear you better. 

“These are for you.” You extend the sunflowers towards him. 

He looks around, a bit confused, then takes his headphones off fully, letting them hang around his neck. He takes a step towards the side, which you follow, so you’re out of the way of the traffic of people. “F-For me?!” He seems surprised. You can't blame him, you’re a total stranger. He gestures to himself, placing his palm on his chest. “I think you have the wrong guy!” 

You shake your head, the corners of your lips turn up in a slight smile, mostly out of embarrassment. “No, definitely for you”. 

The stranger takes the bouquet in his hand, examining it. “Who put you up to this? Was it Lee Know Hyung?” He looked back at you, raising a brow. 

 “I don’t even know who that is, I promise they’re for you!” 

You notice his shoulders relaxing and he pinches at one of the blue eucalyptus leaves, feeling its texture. “But… why?” 

You also relax and release the breath inside your lungs you didn’t know you were holding. He seems to at least be open to accepting the gift now. “It’s just something I wanted to cross off my bucket list: give a bouquet of flowers to a stranger.” You smile up at him and you hope that the man in front of you can sense how sincere you are and didn’t think you were an absolute lunatic. 

“Well, thanks.” He slowly starts to smile and suddenly his eyes notice your bag and your suitcase. “Oh, are you visiting?” 

You nod your head yes, “I am! I’m actually here because visiting Korea is also on my bucket list!” 

His eyes grow wide, surprised by your seemingly adventurous personality. “You must have come a long way then, your accent is definitely not from around here.” He motions over to a bench a short walk away and the both of you make your way there. 

“I will take that as a compliment.” Momentarily, you check your phone for the time. He must have noticed you doing so, because he motions to get up. 

“Oh no, did I keep you?” 

“Not at all, I’m just realizing what time it is back home.”  

“Oh, you must be jet lagged, do you need help getting to your hotel?” 

“I don’t have to check in until later,” you lie. You don't even have a hotel yet.

Oops.

"Well, in that case...." He seems nervous as he stands up, very subtly back and forth on the tips of his toes to the back of his heels. If that isn't enough, he rubs the back of his neck before he clears his throat and looks down at your sitting form. You look up at him as if you hadn’t been watching him the entire time. “Is grabbing coffee with a stranger on your bucket list too, then?” 

You can't help but smile, a smile that pulled at your lips wide enough that it made the corner of your eyes crinkle. “It’s not, but I’m sure I could add it in.” 

“Great, then I’ll make sure it’s an extra good café with instagrammable latte art!”  He extends out his hand to help you up. 

Once you stand up, you reach for your suitcase, but he beats you to it. Instead, he places the bouquet of flowers into your hands.  “You carry that, and I’ll take these.” He slings your backpack over his shoulder. 

“No, please let me. It’s really no problem for me!” You hold the bouquet of flowers to him, as if it's a trade off. 

“It might be no problem for you, but what about me? You’re gonna slow us down carrying these things and the café spot gets busy in the afternoon!” He starts to walk away, looking back at you with a smirk after a couple of large strides. 

Well, at least the stranger you picked had a sense of humor and wasn’t some asshole who would have rejected the flowers. Snapping out of your thoughts, you realize he really isn't going to wait for you and hurry after him. 

The stranger— you still don't know his name, by the way; you've had no opportunity to ask—wasn’t kidding when he said that the café got busy. You were both lucky to grab a table on the outside of the establishment all thanks to your hovering and his remarkably subtle ability to place your suitcase in the way of other hopeful individuals looking for a seat.  

Your eyes wander around the place, looking for a waiter or waitress to come and take your order. You desperately don't want to be the one to start conversation. You feel a little awkward sitting down with a guy you just met.

“I’m Han Jisung, by the way.” His voice cuts through the clinking of mugs, the soft hum of the people waiting for a table, and the occasional sound of the cars driving past. 

You bring your eyes back to him, a little caught off guard. He smiles in a way that shows the gums and it's kind of cute, while his eyes crinkle into half crescents. You can't help but smile right back at him. “I’m Y/N.”

Jisung leans forward, into the table with his arms crossed. “So, what brings you to Korea, Y/N?” 

You reach for the old beaten notebook in your bag and place it on the table. “I have this bucket list,” you open the pages and start flipping through it. There were a bunch of pages with cursive scrawls in paragraphs, some doodles, and eventually you stop on the page with the bucket list on it. “Just a bunch of things I wanna do before I die…” You give him a lopsided smile. 

Jisung’s eyes look through the list, then he point at one half way down the page. “Well, you can now cross going to Korea off. “ His index finger drags across the page at another item, “And the bouquet one.” 

“You’re right, thanks.” You take a pen from the front pouch of your backpack and cross those off. 

“How long is your visit?” 

You peer up at him, chewing on your bottom lip. He has an innocently curious expression on his face and you can't help but thank whoever's in charge of fate. Jisung is nice and welcoming, which is just what you need in a country you had never been to before. “About two weeks.” 

“Do you plan on doing more of those here?” 

You nod with a smile. “I do! As many as I can anyway.”  Talking to him isn't as awkward as you think it would be. He's definitely to thank for carrying the conversation so naturally.

“Hi can I take yo—“ a young man, probably around Jisung’s age comes to your table with a small notepad in hand. He has medium brown hair pushed back, a wide smile, and kind eyes. He's wearing a pair of khaki slacks and a nicely pressed dress shirt underneath his navy blue apron. “Oh, Hannie! Hey!” 

Jisung stands and pulls the newcomer into a short hug. “Seungmin!” Jisung motions to you at the table. “This is Y/N. A new friend of mine.” 

You smile at Seungmin and stand, bowing your head slightly. “Hi, nice to meet you.” 

Seungmin motions for you both to sit back down after introductions. “Ah, order whatever you guys want, it’s on the house! I hope you guys didn’t wait too long for a table.” 

Jisung shook his head, sitting back down only after you did. “It didn’t take too long, but this place is crowded! You guys must be doing really well lately.” 

Seungmin nodded with a sort of  crooked grin, “Yeah, well ever since those KPOP idols were seen here, this place has been swamped.” He raised his brows up and down mischievously, looking at the both of you together. “We’re looking for help!” 

Jisung scoffed and playfully rolled his eyes. “No thanks. Y/N is just visiting.” He leaned closer to you, as if the next part was only meant to be heard by you, though he was definitely talking loud enough for Seungmin to hear. “Besides, the last time I helped out he yelled at me for eating a pastry.” 

Seungmin playfully hit Jisung’s arm with his notepad. “It wasn’t a pastry, it was your seventh one of the day.” He cleared his throat. “Anyway, what will you be ordering?”

You looked around, unsure of what was good there. You wanted to get an idea from what others had ordered around you. Everyone seemed to have an iced drink… and they were all really dark coffees “A vanilla iced latte?” Your sweet tooth would never let you have coffee without some kind of creamer in it. 

Seungmin nodded and scribbled it down. Then, without looking at Jisung, he said, “Americano, iced. And a slice of cheesecake.” 

Jisung feigned a look of offense. “Am I that predictable?” 

Seungmin laughed. “Honestly, no. But your orders are.” Seungmin placed his notepad in his apron pocket and went back into the cafe to fetch your orders. 

“Ah, that was Seungmin. He and I go way back. Now he helps run this place!” 

“That must be difficult, but this place looks great.” 

“Yea, he’s always been a caffeine addict. One day, he decided that if he was going to be making coffee everyday, he might as well make money off of it.” Jisung chuckled to himself, then glanced your way from across the table. “Are you staying close by? I could walk you to your hotel after If you’d like” 

You laughed nervously, avoiding eye contact, “Well.. actually…” your voice trailed off, catching a glimpse at his expression before spitting it out, “I don’t have one… yet.” 

“You don’t have one?!” He had raised his voice slightly, startling a couple of people at nearby tables. 

“Yet! I said yet!” You nervously played with the pen in your hands. 

“You came to Korea without a place to stay!?” 

“I literally bought my tickets two hours before the flight took off!” 

Seungmin came back with your orders, just in time to catch the last bit of your conversation. His eyes widened in shock. 

“TWO HOURS?” Both Jisung and Seungmin echoed you simultaneously. 

You grabbed your iced vanilla latte and started chewing on the straw. “I mean… it probably sounds a lot worse than it is...” 

Seungmin bent down at his knees to rest his arms on the table, head tilted. In that position, he really reminded you of a puppy. “Are you rich?” 

“Umm, definitely not." You placed your free drink on the table and chuckled at the thought.

Jisung raised a brow in your direction, “So you’re broke.”  

You grabbed your phone and checked your bank app. There was a silence that passed, the boys watching you carefully. You exhaled slowly and put your phone on the table, screen down. “Not like broke broke.”

Seungmin stood back up and forcefully put his hands on Jisung’s shoulders from behind him, giving them a squeeze for emphasis, “Well it’s a good thing that Hannie has a spare room, yea?” 

The two of you exchanged looks until he finally said something, “I mean… Yeah… I guess I do.” 

Jisung shot Seungmin a glare as he went back into the cafe then looked back you. You were still staring at him blankly, not saying a word. You were going through the logistics of it all in your head. It would be a free place to stay, but he was a complete stranger. This whole thing was a spontaneous trip, it was supposed to be a way for to come out of your comfortable way of living. You had been complacent, and quite honestly, staying in one place wasn’t going to help your mental health. But neither was staying with a stranger. 

“It’s not like I’m an ax murderer or anything.” 

Your silence was met with Jisung shrugging and grabbing his pastry off the plate in front of him. He broke it up into smaller pieces before stuffing it into his cheeks. He looked a little silly, reminding you of a squirrel with puffed up cheeks. “Or you can find a hotel room with all the money you still have saved up.” 

You were quickly reminded of the lack of money in your bank account. “Okay yea,” you mumbled under your breath, “lead the way.” 

Jisung gave you a short tour of his place. It was on the seventh floor, two bedrooms, one bathroom. A small kitchen with an equally as small island, enough for two people to eat at. He had a black couch facing a TV that was hooked up to a play station, probably the newest one. 

You came out of the bathroom after showering in an over sized gray shirt and navy blue shorts underneath. You were towel drying your hair when you noticed he was at the sink. You sat at the island, his back to you.  “Thanks for letting me stay with you.” 

He seemed busy with something, but he looked over his shoulder at you. “Yea, no problem. Don’t worry about it.” 

Seeing as he was a bit busy, you went into the spare room you were staying in and grabbed your notebook. You decided to bring it back to the island; if you were going to stay with Jisung for at least a couple of days, you were going to get to know him. He definitely seemed and had proven himself nice enough.

“Is that the list again?” Jisung asked you when you sat back down, still focused on whatever it was he was doing. 

“Yeah, it is.” 

“Cool!” He threw something away in the trash under the sink. Whatever it was he was working on, he placed it in the counter next to the sink. 

“What kind of stuff do you think you could cross off?” He turned around and leaned on the island across from you. His head tilted, curious as he looked at you with warm round brown eyes. 

You couldn’t stop yourself from smiling. “Let’s see.” You opened up to the page, looking over the list and reading off a few at random.

“Paint a portrait. Sing at a karaoke bar. Fall asleep under the stars. Watch the sun rise—“

“Those are easy! You traveled all the way to korea for that? Where are the fun spontaneous ones?” 

You sighed and ran your hands down your face. “I have those too, but they’re embarrassing!” 

“Try me.” 

You held your head in your hands, looking down at the book to avoid looking at him. “Crash a wedding.” 

“Ooo that sounds fun. What else you got?” 

“I booked a flight to Korea in two hours isn't that spontaneous enough?!” 

He shook his head, still smiling. 

You looked back down. “Goskinnydipping...” You mumbled very quietly and quickly, then cleared your throat trying to glaze over that bit, hoping he didn’t hear. When he didn't react, you continued. “Get a tattoo.” Slowly, you looked at him through your damp hair that fell over your eyes. 

“Okay. Let’s do it.” He smiled at you, mischievous one. 

“Get a tattoo?” You panicked and you could feel the heat rushing to your cheeks. Had he heard you? 

“Let’s accomplish as many things on your list as we can while you’re here.” 

You looked at him with a brow raised. You didn’t even know what to say. “Like… together?” 

Jisung nodded simply. “Yes. Together. Why not?” 

“More like why? Why would you do that with someone you just met?” 

He mimicked your raised brow, but the smirk remained. “You bought me flowers, remember? We’re basically dating now.” 

Huh? He was joking, right? 

“Just kidding. But come on, think about it! It’ll be fun! Plus… do you know how to get around Seoul?” 

Again, he had a point. 

You bit your lower lip and scanned the room trying to avoid eye contact. It was then you noticed that the thing he was working on was the bouquet of flowers that you bought, stems cut and placed in a tall glass. 

You smiled and finally nodded, “Okay.” 

“Okay?” He looked at you with wide eyes, smirk growing into a smile, excited that you had agreed. 

“Yea. Let’s do this.” 

author's notes: if for whatever you want to be added to a taglist, let me know :)

taglist

@burningchaosdeer

#han jisung x reader #skz x reader #han jisung fanfic #han jisung #stray kids x reader #jisung fic #jisung fluff #skz fanfic #jisung smut #han jisung smut #han jisung series #jisung series

[hedawanheda]

secret recipe- prologue

Clarke has been given six months to find a serious and genuine relationship or else her father will hand over the company to Cage Wallace. Lexa just wants to cook.

or

Lexa is the Griffin’s personal chef.

Clarke Griffin is a leader. She’s a girl who knows what she wants and she doesn’t care how she gets it. When she talks, people listen. When she walks by, people stare. She exudes a confidence and energy that makes everyone who knows her respect her, while also fearing her a little. Her life is dedicated to her work, the Fortune 500 company her family had built from the ground up.

So when her father announces at his retirement party (that she flew all the way from California to attend and moved back home for this promotion) that his temporary successor would be Cage Wallace, she is understandably pissed.

“Don’t cause a scene,” her mother whispered harshly to her as she watched Cage walk up and shake her father’s hand. Clarke was in utter disbelief, waiting for her to wake up from her nightmare or for Ashton Kutcher to come out and say she was punk’d.

Cage caught her eye, sending her a gloating smile as he posed for the papers. Clarke felt the heat rise to her cheeks as her anger began to take over, clenching her glass so tightly that she was surprised it didn’t break. That should be her up there.

As the applause for Cage continued, Clarke downed the rest of her drink. Then the rest of her mom’s. Then she flagged down a waiter who was passing out shots to celebrate Cage’s promotion and Jake’s retirement.

And then she doesn’t remember the rest of her night.

She wakes up in her childhood bedroom which she miraculously got to somehow in her drunken state. The sun shines into her eyes way too early, rousing her from her deep slumber. Her rumbling stomach, pounding head, and dry mouth are too much to ignore, so she dragged herself out of her bed and trudged her way down to the kitchen in search of a greasy breakfast and some aspirin.

She opened the refrigerator and let the cold air hit her, taking a deep sigh and rubbing her forehead before searching for the orange juice. When she found it, she took a swig from the bottle, letting the citrusy flavor cost her parched tongue.

“Good morning, Miss Clarke,”

Clarke dropped the bottle of juice, startled by the other presence in the room. She was so hungover that she didn’t realize that she wasn’t alone.

“Holy shit- Lexa?!” she gaped. Clarke hadn’t seen Lexa since the girl went off to culinary school in Paris a decade ago.

“Welcome home,” Lexa smiled, ignoring the blonde’s disheveled appearance. Clarke was grateful for that, considering she was in a pair of flannel pajama bottoms and an old oversized college sweatshirt. Her hair was piled into a messy bun, and she undoubtedly had bags under her eyes from her late night. “Can I get something started for you?” Lexa asked politely.

“Huh?” Clarke was so shocked from seeing her old friend that she didn’t take in her appearance. Lexa was wearing a white chef’s coat and black pants, her hair tied back in braids. She was standing behind the kitchen counter, hands folded behind her back with an array of skillets and knives laid out in front of her.

“For breakfast,” Lexa explained patiently. “What would you like?”

“What are you doing here?” Clarke asked, answering Lexa’s question with one of her own. “The last time I heard you were at some Michelin star restaurant in the French Riviera.”

Lexa pretended that she didn’t hear that. “There’s pancakes or waffles, I could also do crepes if you wanted those. Omelets, eggs Benedict, frittata-“

“Wait, hold on-“

“Oatmeal, French toast, bagels-“

“Can you just stop for a minute-“

“Your dad has me hide his sugary cereal from your mom, I can dig that out-“

“Lexa! Stop listing breakfast food!” Clarke said, exasperated. “What are you doing in my house?”

Lexa paused, looked down and avoiding Clarke’s eyes. “Isn’t it obvious? I work here,”

“But… why?” Clarke was genuinely confused. Why would someone give up a great and promising career to cook for her parents?

She didn’t get her answer, because her father entered the kitchen with a bright and cheery smile on his face. Clarke instantly scowled. She may not have remembered how most of her night had gone, but she remembered being burned by the person she called her father.

“Good morning, sweetie. Good morning, Lexa,” he said gleefully. He walked over and kissed the top of Clarke’s head, ignoring his daughter’s sour face. “Isn’t today a glorious day?”

“I see you’re enjoying your first day of retirement, sir,” Lexa grinned at him. “Shall I prepare your usual?”

“Please. But add extra bacon, I feel like celebrating,”

“Didn’t you and your bestie Cage do enough of that last night?” Clarke grumbled. Jake turned to her, smiling, and placed his hands on both sides of her face.

“Lighten up, sweetie. I’m sure once you have some food in you, you’ll be happier,”

“Food won’t make me happy,” Clarke said through squished cheeks. She removed her father’s hands from her face, angrily crossing her arms. Jake chuckled at his daughter’s death glare.

“You’ve haven’t had Lexa’s cooking in a long while. She’s like a food Midas, anything she makes turns to gold,”

“What happened to Alie?” Jake’s smile fell while Lexa looked down at her hands. “What?” Clarke asked again, looking between her father and Lexa. It was weird seeing Lexa at the house and not having her mom there, the chef the Griffins had since before Clarke was born.“What are you not telling me?”

“My mother passed away last year,” Lexa said quietly, not meeting Clarke’s eye. “Cancer,”

This morning has turned out to be quite the surprising event for the blonde.

“Excuse me?!” Clarke said angrily, turning to her father. “You didn’t think of mentioning this to me over the past year? That the woman I’ve known for as long as I’ve known you died?”

“In his defense, she wanted to keep her illness private,” Lexa explained calmly. When Clarke looked at her, her gaze softened. She wasn’t the one Clarke was rightfully angry towards. “The funeral was a small affair. Just family,”

Clarke frowned. Wasn’t she considered family? “That still doesn’t mean it was okay not to mention it to me,”

“You’re right,” Jake sighed, holding up his hands in surrender. “I’m sorry, that was wrong of me. Why don’t we sit down and have Lexa make us a nice breakfast. I’m sure there’s something on your mind,”

//

“Why did you pass over me for the promotion?” Clarke asked as Lexa slid plates of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast in front of her and Jake. “Why did you choose Cage of all people?”

“I know what you think of him, but he’s actually a brilliant man,” Jake started digging into his meal, talking with his mouth full. “Difficult, but brilliant,”

“But I don’t understand. You’ve been preparing me to take over for you since I started at the company. And I actually worked my way up from the bottom,”

“Cage is only a temporary solution,” Jake explained. “He will be interim CEO for the next six months before I decide if you’re fit enough to take over,”

“And what do you consider that to be?”

“How do I say this?” Jake rubbed his chin. “Clarke, you need a life,”

Clarke looked and felt offended. “What are you talking about? I have a life,”

“You’re a twenty eight year old workaholic who’s never had a serious partner before. Your mother and I are worried about you,”

“And where’s Mom now? Work.” Clarke snapped. “And the partner thing? A little misogynistic, don’t you think?”

Jake sighed. “Honey, don’t start. If I gave you the position right away, you would never find time to settle down,”

“So what are you saying? I can’t get the position I earned until I get hitched?”

“Not exactly,”

”Not exactly?”

“Well, not married per say, but a relationship, yes,”

Clarke stared at her father, eyes widened in disbelief. “You’re serious,”

“I am,” Jake nodded. “You need to get out there and actually live in the world, Clarke. There’s so much more to life than an office.”

“I do yoga,” Clarke pointed out. “Work’s not my entire life,”

“Honey, I don’t think you realize how sad that sounds,”

Clarke slumped down in her chair. “I could just hire someone, you know,”

“I know. But I’m using the honor code here. I just want you to be happy, to settle down,”

“I can be happy and not be in a relationship,”

“But you’re not,” Jake folded his hands on the table, pushing his empty plate away. “Just try. Put yourself out there. As long as I see you’re at least making an effort, the gig is yours.” This made Clarke sit up straighter in her chair.

“Really?” she asked. “So I have to just go on a few dates?”

“Emphasis on the effort, Clarke. And besides, six months is a long time, who knows? Maybe you’ll find your person,” Jake smiled warmly at his daughter, who rolled her eyes. “You’re a little too old for that now,”

“And I’m also a little too old for you to be telling me what to do,”

Jake sighed. “This isn’t a punishment. I really do want what’s best for you Clarke. Six months. That’s all I’m asking for,”

“Fine,” Clarke huffed, throwing down her fork on her partially eaten plate. She had lost her appetite, no matter how good it looked. “I’ll agree to this, no matter how dumb it is. It’s not like I’m actually going to fall in love just because you gave me a deadline.” Jake smiled, doing a little happy dance in his chair.

“I think this is going to be good for you, Clarke,” he said. Lexa came in and began clearing away the dishes as quietly as she could, trying to go unnoticed. Clarke watched her, not wanting to look at her father’s triumphant grin. She didn’t realize her eyes were trailing the girl until Lexa left and her father cleared his throat. When she turned back to him, his grin was faint, but there was a twinkle in his eye as he looked between Clarke and the doorway where his chef exited.

“Something amusing?” Clarke asked.

Jake chuckled. “No, nothing at all,”

read on ao3!

#it’s suuuuper short i just wanted to get the gist out there before i dive in!! #clexa #clexa fanfic #clarke griffin #commander lexa #clarke x lexa #fic: secret recipe

[hermesmyplatonicbeloved]

Two POVs of Percy & Poseidon in HoO: The Neglectful Parent and the Helping Behind the Scenes Parent

Sometimes I like to think that after Percy returns home from the nightmare that was HoO (and Tartarus) he's big-time angry with Poseidon.

I mean, he was kidnapped, brainwashed and manipulated by Hera (using Annabeth's name no less), and then barely got his memories back before getting thrown into a second war and ended up falling into hell. And when he gets out, he sees Poseidon just casually :) chatting :) with :) Hera :) Like if I was him that would've been my villain origin story. The gods need me to save them? Fuck no. If they're not strong enough (or willing) to protect their own rule and kingdoms, then maybe they shouldn't be ruling at all.

Like I think that pre-hoo Percy and Poseidon were building a good relationship, and Percy would've kept all the gifts that Poseidon gave him (sand dollar aside). Maybe stick some of it up on the wall. Maybe make something, like a family sketch of him, Tyson and Poseidon he commissioned from Rachel. After HoO he's so angry and hurt that he just tears it all down. Rips it to shreds. Sally and Paul hear the racket and come bursting through the door hella worried only to find Percy looking furious with his eyes full of unshed tears with everything that Poseidon gave him (aside from Riptide) in pieces at his feet.

(Meanwhile Poseidon has no idea why his child is so upset. He believed whatever lie or excuse Hera spun to cover her ass and doesn't know how much Percy went through, and he's in for a very rude awakening the next time he tries to talk to Percy).

On the other hand, I like to think that Poseidon was paying attention (as best he could with the Greek-Roman split) and helped Percy out, and its just the fact that Percy had so little POVs that we don't know that Poseidon was in contact and helping out.

Like sure, Poseidon/Neptune wasn't able to help Percy against Polybetes, so he gave Percy power over poison so Percy could protect himself.

Percy fell into Tartarus where Poseidon couldn't reach or help him? He had his power over poison from Poseidon that saved him from Akhlys. Poseidon also went to Hermes and made sure that his temple in Tartarus was constantly stocked with food, and maybe sent a few of his elite Cyclops to find/help Percy since he couldn't go due to the Greek-Roman split + Zeus's rules. The cyclops just weren't able to find Percy because Percy and Annabeth's whole strategy was 'move fast to keep ahead of the hoards of titans/giants/monsters chasing us down,' so while their enemies couldn't catch up with them, neither could their allies.

And then afterward. Its canon that Poseidon appears to Percy in dreams to communicate (SoM), and that he shows up after the big battles to check in with Percy in person to see if he's okay (BoTL) so maybe he did that when Percy was alone in his cabin on the Argo II? Or when he gets back to Sally's apartment after HoO? And Percy just didn't want to tell anyone because 1. all the roman demigods are terrified of Poseidon/Neptune, 2. Annabeth does NOT like Poseidon (or his kids - Percy is the only exception) and they generally don't talk about Poseidon in a family context so why would he tell her, especially after she was scared to tears of his Poseidon given powers and 3. Percy isn't close to any of the other people on the Argo II (Piper - he thinks Percy needs to be controlled - the one thing the sea hates, and Leo - who's terrified of Percy).

#percy jackson #poseidon #percy & poseidon #pjo #hoo #heroes of olympus #percy jackson and the olympians #annabeth chase #rick riordan #percy #riordan verse #pjo hoo toa #pjo fandom #headcanons #pjo fic ideas #sally jackson #percy jackson whump #tartarus #percy poison control

[motherofplatypus]

A short fic of that scene where BDubs ask Grian if he wanted Scar to be killed. Don't expect good grammar, im just a platypus. Here's to you @morickkk mate, dont think I didn't mean it when i said im currently writing one lol.

Also don't expect proper grammar. Im just a platypus.

***

"Hey! You want me to kill Scar?"

Those words flowed like thick mud into his ears. He wasn't sure if he heard it correctly, especially with Jimmy being a new voice in his head and nearly drove him into madness 5 minutes into the session.

So Grian waited for a few seconds for his brain to actually understand what BDubs just said. And as soon as his brain processed those words that almost sounded like an ancient language, he came to the realization that the words meant exactly what they meant, and his heart sunk into his stomach.

Scar? Kill him? Kill Scar? His brain jumbled up with the idea of the businessman had his blood drawn out of him.

Blood on his hands. A lifeless body beneath him, drowned in a pool of crimson blood, adorned with sands, poppy, and lilac. The rustic smell of blood filled his lungs, and an apology that echoed in his head.

Grian choked up. Whatever he had for breakfast crawled their way up to his throat. He barely just able to keep his food inside him. The acidic taste left a lingering sting in his throat, but it was nowhere near as bad as the imaginary scent of blood in his nose.

He can't let it happen. He can't let Scar be killed. He can't...he just can't. It doesn't matter if it's a task or just plain revenge, he can't let it happen.

Grian is aware that Scar's position as of now is far from good and trustworthy. He had played the role of a villain for 3 sessions in a row. He had griefed, burned, destroyed, stole, hurt, lied, and scammed everyone and everything. But it was all because of his task.

Grian remembered when he asked Scar to be his friend, but couldn't say yes because his task was to do the opposite of anything people said. He saw the desperation in his eyes, the loneliness. How he laughed while his eyes screaming for help to be saved. He's not a bad guy, at least not as bad as everyone thought he is.

It was all because of his task.

"Can we still be friends?" His voice echoed, gentle and desperate as a red name could be. Poppies and lilacs in hand, an offering for a partnership.

Grian won't allow it. He will not let Scar get hurt, let alone be killed. No. He rejects the idea of Scar getting killed.

"Say yes."

Grian's mouth closed as soon as it opened. His body is no longer his when those words were spoken. Jimmy had given the order, and it's his task to obey.

His body trembled, resisting the influence of his so-called Guardian Angel. It was painful. It was agonizing. The more he resists, the more intense the pain he felt all over his body, like hundreds of tiny blades twisting inside his body, slowly making their way into his heart.

Still, Grian resisted. Resist the influence and control the other had on him. If succeeding meant he had to relive that moment again, he'd rather be a failure.

Persistent as he may be, it was only a matter of time before the pain won him over. Before the pain became too much to handle. Before resistance became obedience.

His lips trembled. The word is already at the tip of his tongue. Mustering what's left of his strength, he resists once more, to no avail.

"Yes." Grian had finally spoke.

And he crumbled from within. His heart was crushed and shattered. The joy and laughter that came from everyone around him sounded like a mockery. A mockery for his attempt to resist.

Grian felt his limbs went numb. The word he said may not came from his heart, but it came from him. He said it, with his own mouth and tongue. With his own voice.

A smaller voice within his head spoke to him, telling him he did a great job to resist. That what matter was that he tried. But an even bigger voice told him, his own voice, that he's a failure to keep Scar save once more.

#i wrote this while waiting for my bike getting fixed lol #secret life #life series #limited life #grian #goodtimeswithscar #goodtimewithscar #hermitcraft goodtimeswithscar #hermitcraft grian #third life #3rd life #3rd life smp #life smp #double life smp #secret life smp #desert duo #desertduo #secret life spoilers #gtwscar #gtws

[deepouterspacecandy]

Chronicles of Ember: Part One

Violence and sexual themes. 18+ only

Sometimes, when you’re alone and feeling nostalgic, you travel back to the memory of her simply to remind yourself it happened. It was real. Her touch engraved in your mind and hidden at the depths of your soul.

A towering pang wrenches at your chest every time you let yourself remember, really remember the brush with fate you experienced that morning.

The universe gifting you more than you bargained for during an otherwise dreadful scavenging effort. And it’s the skiff you notice first, with each trip down memory lane.

The way the pebble-strewn shore had nearly swallowed it whole. You can still taste your salt-bitten lips as you approach the small boat, gnawing at the dry skin you’d long since given up finding a consistent remedy for.

You weren’t sure what you’d find as you crept closer. History and hard lessons failed to remind you to scope it out from a higher vantage point before making your approach.

Sure, the scene appeared harmless from a distance, all wrapped up in giant swaths of dried kelp and peppered with barnacles.

A beautifully cruel trap. A stroke of dumb luck between strangers at the darkest edge of a desolate coastal town.

__________

“Holy shit.”

There were no supplies inside this boat. No ropes, no fishing line. If there was ever food, it would be difficult to find proof of it.  

Instead, and to your utter amazement, there lay two frail bodies with just enough colour left in their cheeks to prompt you to check for a pulse.

“Holy shit,” you repeat, louder this time. The emaciated forms don’t so much as twitch and you’re not as relieved as you might otherwise be.

Huddled together, they appear lifeless.

You check for obvious signs of infection and its feeble work. Something, or someone, riddled one of the motionless bodies with injury. You knew a knife wound, or two dozen, when you saw them. These weren’t bites or scratches. But maybe you were just hopeful.

“Can you hear me?”

It had been weeks since you’d seen another living person.

You climb inside the boat and lose your footing, algae thick beneath your shoes. You catch yourself before you end up in the same unfortunate condition—piled on top of them like a soggy bag of laundry.

Your knee catches the sharp-set limbs of the woman below you and you hear her groan.   

“Oh god, I’m so sorry!” you say as you kneel beside her. “I swear I’m not trying to hurt you.”

Deep-set scars paint the face of the boy curled up next to her, the rest of his body littered with lacerations, many healing badly. A side effect of a brittle immune system, you suspect, but you’re no doctor.

This world is unkind to most everyone in it, and you presume these two have survived more horrors in recent months than most face in their lifetime, based on their physical condition alone.

The harsh reality of the matter is that there’s no workable way for you to transport both to a safer location. It’s a twenty-minute hike to your current hideout, and that’s on a good day. Today didn’t feel like one of those. Rain is coming down in a drizzle, but it’s only a matter of time and you’re sure the screams you hear beyond sight belong to an unwelcome visitor or two.

“I don’t know what to do,” you say.

The bodies inside the boat offer no suggestions. Another shriek rings out from afar and your heart hammers inside your chest.

“If you can hear me, please open your eyes.” You wait for the flicker of eyelids or a cough. Anything to show there’s something left to save.

The scream you hear next sends a frigid chill down your spine. You twist awkwardly to investigate and immediately regret the decision. One hundred and fifty feet away, maybe less, you see it, extremities flailing in the distance like gangrenous, water-logged tree branches.

“I think he’s blind, but we don’t have much time,” you say, mostly to yourself. “Hey! You need to wake up. Now.”

The woman groans again as you shake her ailing body. You squeeze her shoulder harder and while you wish there was time for a gentler approach, you also recognize the abject danger you’ll face in about six seconds if you don’t make an escape.

“I really need you to get up—do you hear me? He’ll tear us all apart.”

You swear the woman mumbles something, but the sky tears open, giving leave to sheets of rain that thrash against the boat like a drum.

It’s impossible to focus through the pounding in your ears.

You lean in, close enough to feel her erratic breath on your face.  

“Lev,” she rasps. “Take Lev.”

“What?”

She grimaces and clenches her teeth, her trembling hand weakly pushing the small body next to her.

You gripe, “I can’t move him by myself,” but she falls quiet and a sobering realization dawns on you.

She may have used her final breath to save this kid. It’s worth attempting, if for no other reason than to pay tribute to her last wishes.  

You turn around once again to gauge the distance between you and a brutal death when you notice the weather has given you a leg up. Raindrops reverberate off rusty debris on the beach, disorienting the plague-ridden creatures that inexplicably travel in packs during your most vulnerable moments.

Although you’re not built for hauling the sick and wounded, you lift the boy until the boat lets out a deafening creak. It immediately draws the attention of a writhing monster, whose click-clack squalls turn your stomach sour.  

You strip the coat from your back and place it over the woman you’re forced to abandon.

“I’m so sorry,” you say. “I’ll try to lure them away from you.”

******   

Embers explode from the firepit and land directly onto your lap. You leap from the mossy log and flail around as if they have set you on fire.

His laughter booms.

“You little shit,” you say, and it only serves to make him laugh harder.  

“My bad,” Lev smirks, proud to overuse the phrase he adopted from your experience with the old world. “It was my turn. I’m just trying to be useful.”

“Oh yeah? And you figure setting me on fire is the best way to accomplish this?”

Lev giggles and drops another log onto the flames, this time with more precision. “You’re being dramatic. It wasn’t that bad.”

“Tell that to the hundred tiny holes in my pants. I think you singed my leg hairs.”

He shakes his head, but the smile hasn’t left his face. In the year or so you’ve been travelling together, this might be the happiest you’ve seen him. You’d gladly accept another bucket of embers in your lap to witness it again.

“I guess we better try that camp after all,” Lev says. “Maybe they’ll have clothes. You’re going to need new pants.”

“And all thanks to you.”

“You’re welcome,” Lev retorts.

While his sense of humour has only improved, this kid has always made you laugh with a combination of his sheltered upbringing and naturally playful disposition. There’s darkness in the experiences he’s endured, but it hasn’t altered his humanity.

Which is more than you can say for most people you’ve encountered on the road.    

“You’re probably right,” you say. “We’re running low, and I don’t think we’ll last much longer out here without better shelter.”

Lev’s smile fades. “They have tents. Good ones.”

It was the first thing you noticed. A group with large canvas tents and an abundance of ammunition, unlike any you’ve seen outside quarantine zones.

“It’s dangerous,” you say. “We’ll have to wait until it gets dark and even then, we’re walking a thin line.”

“What line?” Lev asks before shooting you another playful smirk.

He understood more than he let on sometimes.

“If we only take what we need, we should be able to get in and out of there before anyone notices.”

Lev nods, his attention lost to the pop and glow of the coals. He collects a handful of leaves, damp from the forest floor, and balls them up in his hands. They sizzle when he tosses them onto the fire, and you watch as their edges curl. He repeats it until there aren’t any leaves within arm’s reach.

“You doing okay?” you ask.

He frowns and ponders, pulls his knees to his chest to rest his chin. You figure it’s a step in a healthier direction. A few months ago, he might’ve recited the easiest answer before changing the subject. 

“I miss her.”

“Your sister?” you ask.

“Everyone, I guess. My mom. My sister,” Lev says as he reaches for the crooked stick he’d been using to poke at the campfire. “Abby.”

You resist the urge to ease his grief with a string of useless discourse, but it rakes at your soul to see his expression fall. If there’s anything you understand at your core, it’s the anguish and despair the loss of a loved one can leave behind. You find it hard to swallow as you wrap your arms around yourself and listen.

“Sometimes I play it out in my head over and over, you know? Trying to figure out what I could’ve done better or quicker, or—I don’t know,” he explains, blinking back his sorrow. “Everything always happens too fast.”

He’s right. Between survival and catastrophe, there’s rarely time to pause and even less time to calculate. It’s a breakneck world where the infected aren’t the only ones looking to cause destruction.

You wish it could be different for him.

“I’m scared something will happen to you,” Lev says. “And then I’m alone. I don’t want to be alone.”

Your vision blurs and you concede to spilling a few futile words. “Well, I’m not going anywhere. Not if I can help it, okay? We’re in this together.”

“Even when I try to set you on fire?” Lev says, rubbing his palms against tired eyes.

“Yeah, even then,” you chuckle. “But you better watch yourself, because I hold one hell of a grudge.”

Lev sticks out his tongue in mock defiance before curling up to get some rest.

You wonder where he learned it from.

Based on his stories from his life with the Seraphites, you doubt it was a tolerated form of communication, even between siblings.

“Thank you for not leaving,” he whispers, and it strikes through you.

You wait for the easeful rise and fall of his chest before letting yourself shed silent tears. One for every collective piece of heartache, neither of you will find time to heal.

“Thank you for giving me a reason to stay.”

----------

If there were such a thing as past lives, it’s unlikely you were a notorious thief or covert operative—especially since you’ve spent an excessive amount of time lurking around a camp you planned to rob with zero advancement.

The makeshift barracks are crawling with soldiers draped in military fatigues, their bedraggled boots bludgeoning the muddy ground with every step. It has you frozen in place, sweat dripping down your back against the subtropical air.

“Food, shelter, disappear,” you chant under your breath, eager to feel that surge of effective fear Lev always talks about.

Instead of valuable terror, what you discover is that it would take multiple trips from the base camp to your small plot of land to manage building a complete shelter and a fierce pit settles into your abdomen.

You kneel and observe. If you’re sneaky about it, you’ll have a better chance leaving with a backpack full of ammunition and a stray weapon or two. Perhaps a hearty meal to boost your energy reserves so you can both return in better shape.

Or maybe it’s finally time to think about moving on and going about searching for a more permanent home. Before the thought of disappointing Lev can permeate, the whiz of his arrow flies past your head and sinks into the canvas behind you.

You spin on your heels to find yourself face to face with an angry gunstock. A burst of intense pain radiates through your jaw, accompanied by the metallic taste of copper pennies and a warm trickle down your ragged shirt.

Another arrow lashes the canvas, this time with a soldier pinned to it by the bulk of his shoulder. He cries out for his comrades and if you weren’t so dazed from the blow to your face, you’d have the good sense to run.

“Don’t you fucking move,” a stern voice warns. The frigid muzzle of a pistol presses into the base of your skull, the heat of a formidable body searing you from behind. “You move, and I end you where you stand.”

You struggle to snap back, reaching an instinctive hand up to your face instead. Your chin is a throbbing, tender orb as you slip your tongue across your teeth to check if there’s been any casualties behind your split lip. Thankfully, not. Dental care wasn’t exactly abundant in these parts.

The troop gathers instantaneously, surrounding you and your captor, and your body becomes a strained rope threatening to break. You’re acutely aware of the hand at the small of your back constricting your wrists. Maybe if you just twist—

“Don’t,” she snarls before yanking you closer.

Your shoulders ache.

“Who are you with?” she asks. “How many?”

“None,” you croak. “Nobody. I’m on my own.”

A gruff soldier trudges toward you, and you’re confronted by his rancid breath. “Bullshit,” he all but spits in your face. “Someone is slinging arrows and you either tell us where to find them, or we find them and make sure it’s the last arrow they shoot.”

“Please, just let me go,” you say.

The soldier pinned to the canvas seems to have a much worse go of it, his breaths becoming laboured as his gaze loses focus. It’s a frenzy of tending to his wounds and searching for the person responsible.

Lev has the astonishing gift of becoming a ghost when he needs to make himself scarce, but this group has clear militance and strategy that the two of you lack, especially in your bloodied state.

“We need a plan, Anderson. He’s bleeding out.”

A huff of breath hits your neck, and it’s miraculous her grip hasn’t eased up. Your shoulders and wrists are desperate for respite.

“Let me go,” you say. “I won’t be any trouble. You won’t see me again.”

The woman sniffs and clutches you harder. “I’ve heard that before. Fool me once.”

Her anger radiates with every twitch of her tight restraint, and you understand. But this fury feels deeper than it should.

When a soldier calls out from the field about a boy with a recurve bow, you lose composure and resist her stranglehold, lunging yourself forward. She fumbles but uses it to her advantage, taking you to the ground.

Gravel and twigs grate the skin on your arms as she flips you onto your back.

You shout in the face of the woman holding you hostage. Wriggle and try like hell to drive your knees into her back as she straddles you.

“Relax,” she says, and it’s an order. You crane your neck, desperate to locate Lev among the bedlam. “Hey—fucking relax!”

You don’t relax and you do not stop trying to break free. She grabs your face to redirect you and it’s the first time you cry out in pain. It shocks you both, her hand retracting so fast she takes her whole upper body along with it.

“I won’t let you hurt him. I swear to God if you touch him, I’ll kill you myself,” you spit and she’s still staring down at you like she can’t believe she caused pain to a stranger that, let’s face it, she is well within her rights to accost.

“Nobody is killing anybody,” she says, her brows furrowing into an irritated arch. “But you did this, okay? You and whoever you’re with. Why the hell wouldn’t you just approach our camp like a normal human being?”

“Oh, hilarious,” you retort, back to writhing against the unpleasant grip of her iron thighs. “I’ve seen your group, and every group like it. You’d have killed us on site.”

“You’re wrong,” she says, her tone arctic and deep. “We’re not all the same.” She gestures to the injured soldier being transported into a Humvee on a cobbled together stretcher. “But this shit has consequences.”

The Humvee is past its prime, but it starts up with a roar, soldiers packing in like a clown car. Your hip bones are raw from the friction of this brawny woman on top of you, and you’re not all the way convinced she won’t knock your lights out, so you relinquish any attempt to escape.

“What kind of consequences?” you ask.

She narrows her eyes at you. “What would you do in our boots?”

“I wouldn’t be in your boots,” you grumble. “I don’t fuck with community anymore—people are untrustworthy,” you continue, giving her a once-over, “and violent.”

“Are you referring to people who roll up and steal shit for no reason, or just the ones who hold you accountable for your stupid ass choices?”

Before you’re able to retaliate, her gaze wanders into the far distance and her unforgiving grip on your body slackens. Her eyes become fixed on the only person on this planet you care to protect.

“No. No! Please don’t,” you beg, but she’s on her feet faster than you can blink.  

You scramble to put yourself upright and slip on the muddy ground before regaining composure. Your heart falls through your body as you watch this woman barrel toward Lev, helpless to prevent it.

You run toward them, fuelled by the ice-cold panic coursing through your veins and suddenly you’re clinched to her back, arms around her neck, weightless against her force but determined to take her down.

She’s agile in her movements and shrewd in combat.

You’re on the receiving end of her expertise.

The soldier holding Lev separates the two of you before the world shrinks in a way you never expected.

“Abby,” Lev chokes out. His bottom lip is wobbling, and you’re fighting to catch your breath before it clicks.

Abby is on her knees by the time Lev wraps himself around her neck, this time with no threat of bloodshed.

This is the person Lev has been holding out for all along—the person preventing the two of you from moving on to a more stable environment and you get it now.

You see why he needed to check the beach often. You understand why even after all these months and the deterioration of hope, he still dragged you down there from time to time.

What if she made it out? What if she comes looking?

You notice her for the first time when she spins to look at you. Steel-blue eyes, red rimmed and damp, raking over your form. She is rugged, and scars of every shape and size carve her face. But when she tilts her head, she becomes feather soft.

“You’re the one who saved him,” Abby says, her voice high and thick with emotion. “I thought it was a fever dream.”

Speechless, you feel yourself shrug.

She frowns at you, and then you hear it. The most melodic amalgamation of joyful laughter between Lev and Abby, while the combatants still lingering in the camp, gather in relative confusion. The soldiers murmur among themselves, and you’re suddenly overwhelmed by the worry of what to do with your hands.

“What now?” you ask.

Abby dips her head before finding your gaze. “I don’t know. We head back home.”

“What—what exactly happens when we do that?” you stammer.

“Well, we ask the boss how to handle you,” she says. “Maybe get this kid a bite to eat.” She gestures at Lev but locks her eyes on yours.

“Is your boss the scorched earth type? Because we didn’t mean to hurt anyone, and I’m not looking to walk us headfirst into trouble.”

She tucks a tuft of hair behind her ear, tidying up the mess you made of her low ponytail. Abby looks nothing like the frail human you found at the water’s edge. She is a mighty force, restored and rosy-cheeked.

Your fingers are a pretzel, and she studies the way you twist them together to soothe your nerves.

“I’ve got you,” Abby says. “Both of you.”

“What about your boss?”

“Right. Scorched earth and whatnot,” she smirks. “I think you’re safe for now.”

“You think? Well, that’s great.”

If you grab Lev and run for the hills, you might have a fighting chance at survival. Perhaps you’re overestimating your ability to outrun this absolute behemoth of a woman, but you’ve never been one to throw in the towel.

Abby orders her group to call for transportation and to prepare to move locations. They all seem to scatter in the wind, gathering supplies and organizing their gear.

Oh.

“You’re the boss,” you say.

“Yes ma’am,” she says, stripping off her sweater and handing it to you. Underneath is a tight black shirt you’re loathed to linger on a little too long. “Something like that. Play your cards right, and I might just show you how well we operate.”

Lev beams at you. “You can trust her,” he says.

Abby gave you the shirt off her back—that counts for something. You turn it over in your hands and there’s a patch stitched neatly below the collar. You skim over it with the pad of your thumb and let out a deep breath.

----------

The drive to their settlement calms your racing heart. Despite a serious reluctance to leave yourselves vulnerable, there’s comfort in an armed and disciplined group surrounding you.

Abby and Lev shift between gabbing and sharing their stressful trials and tribulations. You overhear bits and pieces about the weeks leading up to their separation and it adds up to exactly the state you found them in. You try to mind your business, but the journey Abby traversed just to get both feet on the road to recovery captivates you.

She slept for nearly a week after reuniting with the Fireflies. You suspect she battled profound grief the moment her eyes opened back up. If Lev’s own voyage is anything to go by.

“You like cats?” Abby asks. It isn’t until Lev elbows you that you realize she didn’t mean the question for him. “You know, with the whiskers and the purring?”

“No, I know,” you say. “Uh—yeah. I mean, it’s been a minute since I’ve spent time with any. Cats are alright.”

She chews on your answer without breaking eye contact.

Heat creeps up your neck.

“Cool,” she grins.

You need a quick distraction and make a point of staring through the windshield, sitting rod straight in your seat. You swear you hear Abby chuckle in tiny, quiet puffs of air, but it’s simpler to concentrate on the weathered trail nature has reclaimed.

“Almost there,” Abby says, tapping on the driver’s shoulder. “We’re going to hang back for a bit. I’ll bring them around in the morning.”

He nods and surveils you through the rearview mirror.

“Hang back where? You’re not separating us,” you say. “I’m staying with Lev.”

“Easy,” she warns, but she appears oddly gratified by your proclamation before giving Lev a nudge. “Quite the guard dog you’ve got here, huh?”

Your antics, as usual, amuse Lev. “Yeah, we’re not a bad team.”

“I can see that. Got room for one more?” she asks.

Lev grins, and before you know it, you’re the three musketeers.

The military vehicle lurches to a squealing stop, and you’re ushered onto a driveway overrun by weeds. Beyond it is a decaying structure snaked through with vibrant vines. Broken windows reveal the interior’s abandonment, but on the porch, a beautiful wind spinner catches the light.

“It’s a little rough, but it’s got potential,” Abby explains. “Good bones, as my dad would call it.”

“You live here?” you ask.

“I do. Well, sort of. I’m needed in town, so I stay there sometimes, but I’m trying to build something more permanent, I guess. I was going a little nuts without a project.”

A makeshift greenhouse rests to one side of the property, busy nurturing plants and vegetables you notice through the glass. Your stomach growls.

“Plenty of that to go around,” she says, nodding at her garden. “Venison too. We just got back from a buck hunt, so you’re right on time.”

“I could eat a whole deer,” Lev groans.

“Oh, yeah? I might be able to arrange that,” Abby chuckles. The steps that lead to her front door are rickety and she reaches her hand out for you to grab.

You hesitate before accepting her assistance.

“Thanks,” you breathe. “I’m pretty clumsy.”

“I figured,” she says, and her smile rivals the wind spinner.

Abby is a gorgeous woman, and the acknowledgment of it deposits a hard lump in your throat that you’re forced to swallow around. If you hold her hand all the way into the living room, it’s strictly for safety reasons.

“Home sweet home,” she announces, dropping her arm around Lev’s shoulders. “You’re getting tall, kid.”

“And you owe me a deer if you want me to keep growing,” Lev says. He leans into her and your heart squeezes.  

Their bond gives you hope that chosen family still matters in this world.  

Abby gives him a playful shove toward the staircase. “Go grab a shower, Goober. You stink.”

Pure excitement breaks out all over his face and he’s upstairs in record time. You haven’t set up camp near fresh water in ages and the thought of a hot bath is ecstasy.

“Any chance you’ve got a tub?” you ask, toeing at the dusty carpet.

“You bet,” she says. “I’ve gotta be honest—I didn’t take you for a bath girl, but it makes sense. Being clumsy and all.”

“You’re quite the comedian.”

“That’s what they call me. Abby, the comedian,” she titters. “The water tank is about as magnificent as this house, but it’ll do the trick if you wait a while. I can boil some water if you want.”

You fidget, and she picks up on your lack of enthusiasm. It’s a long-broken habit to accept any favours.

“It’s the least I can do,” Abby continues, and she mirrors your anxious hands.

“I tried to rob you.”

She draws her bottom lip between her teeth and steps closer. A breeze drifts through the fractured window and lifts her woodsy scent. An intoxicating blend of fresh pine needles and the sea helps your shoulders drop from your ears.

Abby raises a slow hand to your chin. “I’m sorry we did this.”

“You did nothing. I earned it.”

When she disappears into the other room, you take inventory of the few luxuries she’s placed around her home. A shelf packed with war-torn medical books. Another, littered with novels and wrinkled magazines. Oddball lamps, placed strategically around furniture to indulge her hobbies.

Maybe the two of you have more in common than you expect.

“Here!” Abby announces, and you jump nearly an inch off the ground. “Shit, sorry—I didn’t mean to spook you.”

“It’s fine.”

She flames up into a crimson red, peppered down her neck and onto her collarbone. “Sit down,” she orders, gesturing to a lonely Lawson chair. “Please.”

“Why?” you ask.

When she huffs in what you can only perceive as annoyance, you fight back a smile. Lev and Abby share characteristics only you would likely notice. Little idiosyncratic behaviours buried from the naked eye.

“I’d like to clean that up for you, if you’ll let me.”

“Is it that bad?”

Abby winces. “I don’t want it to get infected. An ounce of prevention, a pound of cure. It’s more relevant than ever lately.”

You amble past the couch and pause when you hear her slide a chair across from yours. It’s shrill as it drags across the floor, and your breath catches.

“You startle easily,” she says, and it’s to herself more than anything—reminiscent of a doctor taking notes to save in your personal file folder. “I promise I won’t hurt you, okay? Please let me take care of this. I’ll be gentle.”

“Gentle Abby. Any association with Comedian Abby?”

“They’re one and the same. I’m extremely dynamic.”

Your uncertainty fades as you drop onto the reading chair. It’s rather comfortable for a piece of furniture you suspect is on the wane. She taps your outer thighs, and you make room for her between your knees.

“Wow. You’re pretty confident for a nerd,” you tease. “Do they know their boss reads romance?”

Her mouth quirks up into a half-smile. “You’re awful nosey for a scaredy cat.”

“I’m observant,” you correct. “One of many skills I’ve gained.”

“Now who’s the cocky one?”

Lev, for an archer of stealth, shocks you both into submission with his thunderous jaunt down the stairs. His hair is a porcupine, sticking up in every direction. Haircuts have been sparse and poorly done with a dull knife until now, but it has made for some funny conversation along the way.

“Can I eat?” Lev asks, making his way into the kitchen. Cupboard doors squeak open and closed, and he hollers to make up for the distance. “Oh man, look at all this food! What’s this brown leather stuff?”

The corners of Abby’s eyes crinkle as she gazes up at you. She hollers back, “Jerky.”

“Can I eat it all?”

Abby’s glee strikes a match to your chilly skin and melts you like ice. You want her to take her time mending your wounds and the thought sets free a butterfly net of flutters between your ribs.

“Knock yourself out,” she shouts.

“What does that mean?” he shouts back, muffled by the jerky you suspect he has shoved into his mouth with both fists.

Abby wrings out the cloth she’s been using to clean the dried blood from your face. She soaks it in a basin of warm water before repeating the process, pressing it to your lower lip. Your eyelids fall as she dabs and glides the spongy cotton along your chin, collecting stray droplets of water as they escape down your neck.

“Is this okay?” she murmurs. “Does it hurt?”

It’s a concerted effort to speak. “No.”

She stops.

“I mean, yes, it’s okay. It feels good—or you know. It doesn’t feel bad.”

Hidden behind your sleepy eyelids, you avoid the embarrassment of your tangled words. Her hand cradles your jaw as her breath chills your wet skin. A deep ache blooms at your core and you catch yourself squeezing your knees against her in response.

It has been a lifetime since you’ve experienced euphoria from human connection. You gnaw on the lip she’s trying to mend, and she delicately scolds you.

“Tired, sweetheart?” she murmurs, and you’re fading fast.

Staying alive has cost you the lavishness of meaningful rest. Inside the walls of Abby’s peaceful home, knowing that Lev is safe, you are losing the resolve to combat sleep. You whimper as the heat of her body abandons you, but before you can protest, you’re off the chair and in her embrace.

“What’s wrong?” Lev asks. “What’s happening—she’s okay, right?”

Abby’s whisper reaches your ears, but your energy has drained from every muscle. “She’s okay. Exhaustion has a way of catching up. I’m going to get her to bed.”

“Good idea,” you hear Lev say. “Make sure a blanket covers her feet. She won’t stay asleep if you don’t.”

“Gotcha. Thanks,” Abby says.

The creak of the old wooden stairs and a pair of powerful arms lull you into a potent slumber.  

#abby x you #abby x reader #abby the last of us #abby tlou #tlou 2 #abby anderson #abby x fem!reader #abby x y/n