#i’m mess

[mumblesplash]

(teaching my art class)

me: and what’s the number one rule when designing characters with wings? …well?

a handful of students, sighing reluctantly: no good fa-

me (interrupting them): NO good-faith attempts at realism, EVER. you want all the bird dweebs and physicists jumping ship as EARLY AS POSSIBLE so they’re not around to cinemasins your ass when you get to the cool parts of your story, and…ugh, what now, gerald

gerald (my least favorite student): why not just do some minimal research instead of-

me: listen you little shit i can and will singlehandedly tank your 4.0 gpa

#mumbling #don’t worry i’m not actually an art teacher i would never #no one deserves that #the art class is a metaphor #man when i was in high school i did NOT fully register how messed up it was that teachers could just do that #like the gym teacher at my school would give straight-A 4.0 students bad grades as some kind of power trip #for underperforming on athletic tests she didn't even pretend to prepare us for

[starspilli]

morning kori. she’s lovingly watching dick burn the shit out of her pancakes

#my art #dc #dc comics #koriand’r #kori anders #starfire #kory anders #titans #dickkory #teen titans #dc titans #dc fanart #there was a dick piece that went with this but i just couldn’t get it right. sad #also. i’m getting more used to the tablet messing w colours but omg it was so bad this time so they r still a little off

[st4ngray]

Flowey collective [part 2] cause I still desperately need him to explode /affectionate

#undertale #undertale yellow #flowey #frisk #uty clover #artists on tumblr #art #digital art #my art #writing this post while in a car #do not like it’s so shaky I can’t see what I’m typing half the time- #if you see me post this earlier #no you DIDNT SHHHDJKDK AA I MESSED UP POST SCHEDULE

[davidtennan-t]

don’t look at me

#I’m a mess #david tennant #doctor who #dt #donna noble #ten x donna #fourteenth doctor #catherine tate #wild blue yonder #bernard cribbins #wilfred mott

[cupcakeslushie]

I just wanted to draw a baby. Just an absolute little man. A small guy. A widdle dude.

Thank you @somerandomdudelmao for this adorable infant Leo.

#rottmnt #rottmnt fanart #tmnt #tmnt fanart #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise leo #future leo #cass apocalyptic series #cass apocalypse fanart #my art #I’m sure I’ll just be a screaming mess when he’s thrown into the Kraang deep end #somebody protect him #how does he look so small in his gear Cass??

[mo-mode]

Okay, but has anyone mentioned yet that Grover is also a vegetarian so when he says “Thanks for the emotional abuse and the cheeseburgers,” he’s like doubling down on Ares’ shittiness?? Ares even mentions how practically all satyrs are vegetarian or vegan when he said all they do is eat tofu. I bet when Grover said that at the end, he was cursing him out so thoroughly on his head, Ares could hear it. “Thanks for the emotional abuse and cheeseburgers you @&!$ing $!@? and you didn’t even get a %£#!ing salad. Oooo you got a big &$%! plate of fries? Whoop-dee &!#@ing doo!! What kind of #&*!ing god are you? A piss poor @#!$ing !%@$ one. Athena’s owl my €@%#.” That’s probably why Ares didn’t bother with the paper towels.

#like that must have been so insulting #I have a dietary restriction myself and if someone was like yeah I got all these massive entrees that you can’t have but oh! we got … #you a plate of fries cuz I know you probably haven’t eaten in like an entire day? I would be PISSED #yeah Grover get his ass #Grover probably sat in silence for thirty minutes staring at that massive plate of burgers then thought yeah I’m gonna mess this bitch up #and psychological warfare Grover was born #grover underwood #percy jackson #pjo #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians #pjo tv show #pjo spoilers #percy jackson tv show #percy jackson the lightning thief #pjo series #ares #ares pjo

[tobisaw]

art dump It’s mostly tommy sorry

#and also mostly blood ! #some of these are kind of old. i’ve been messing with my designs a bit recently #hlvrai #tommy coolatta #hlvrai tommy #dr bubby #hlvrai bubby #benrey #benry #hlvrai benrey #hlvrai benry #tw blood #tw nosebleed #my art #now don’t post again for another week i’m going to be out of state

[kaijukebox]

Ah yes, returning to my Jmart roots.

-

No refs today

#sorry hugs are a damb mess I’m just tryna get back to where I need to be!!!! #IVE MISSED THEM #TMA #the magnus archives #Jonathan sims #Jon sims #martin blackwood #jmart #jonmartin #100hugs2023 #hug 84/100

[kate-komics]

I only cried twice while drawing this.

#bill and frank #the last of us #the last of us spoilers #tlou #tlou spoilers #how dare they #fan art #digital art #i’m a mess

[bunn13z]

i want to sit all pretty on someone’s lap and let them have their way with me. just having them grope me and play with my tits and ass as i grind against their thigh. being a good little bunny in their lap as i moan and whimper until they decide to fuck me.

men and minors dni

#need someone to put their hands on me #just grope me like i’m a toy #want to be a moaning mess on someone’s lap #sapphic nsft #wlw nsft #lesbian nsft #men dni #minors dni

[watchyourbuck]

There’s something about Eddie saying he’s a nester yet being completely incapable of doing such nesting with any of the women we’ve ever seen him with. Shannon was not only his wife, but Chris’ mother, and yet he didn’t feel ready to let her see their son once she came back… I’d even be willing to say he convinced himself into redoing his life with her because it made sense, and not because he was in love with her (again). Ana, however lovely she was, was also very clearly the product of Eddie putting Chris first. We see this when he has The Conversation with Buck: “Chris loves her”, “is that enough?” and soon we find out it isn’t. “We became a ready made family, and I’m not ready for that”. Finally we have Marisol, who he shoved inside his house only to kick out a few days later. But then… cut to Buck and Chris playing video games together, and doing some sort of scrapbook thing for Christmas, and visiting Santa, and going to the zoo. Cut to Buck picking Chris up from school, and being the first person Chris calls when Eddie breaks down (and goes to when he’s mad at his dad). Cut to homemade meals and difficult talks at any of their kitchens, and carrying each other physically and emotionally through the worse possible times. Cut to “there’s no one I trust with my son more than you,” and “this changes nothing between us.” Yeah,,, Eddie can’t nest with the women we’ve seen him with, because he already nested with Buck.

#can u tell I’m a mess again #these gays have it out for me I swear all I do I think of them #911 #buddie #911 tv show #evan buckley #911 abc #911 fox #evan buck buckley #eddie diaz #buck x eddie #buck and eddie #911 spoilers #911 season seven #911 season 7 #911 show #911 s7 #canon bi buck #bisexual buck

[lazycranberrydoodles]

everybody go home. this is my magnum opus

#HELP THIS IS KILLING ME #the original version of this had hua cheng in a ‘i have a CRAZY wife she hates STUPID PEOPLE and LOVES DOGS and im NOT AFRAID TO USE HER’ #but if hua cheng was at midwestern gas station number 472 in the novelty slogan tshirt aisle #she for sure would get some sort of ‘your wife (woman symbol) vs MY WIFE (wonder woman silhouette)’ #or ‘trophy 🏆🏆 WIFE’ #or possibly a ‘return to wife if lost’ #or ‘i have a SMOKIN HOT wife’ #or ‘im the BOSS til my WIFE gets home’ #or ‘5 things you should know about my WIFE: 1. she is my queen 2. she is a bit crazy 3. she can whoop your ass #4. she says whatever she is thinking 5. mess with her and theyll never find your body’ #or ‘i go to work so my wife can COLLECT SCRAPS’ #or even at worst. ‘ my wife is the PRINCESS the mouse LOST’ #xie lian would be initially embarassed. but you know her ass would be wearing a ‘proud PROPERTY of an AWESOME WIFE’ shirts @ heaven meetings #or ‘i’m not scared of ANYTHING - my WIFE is a CALAMITY’ #which was sold as a metaphor for your wife being mean and powerful. but she wears it straight. #or even ‘im not GAY but my WIFE is’ lmfao #anyway. #tgcf #tian guan ci fu #hualian #hua cheng #xie lian #hualesbians #modern au #tgcf meme #my art #art #tgcf shitpost #lmao #mxtx

[artistmarchalius]

Cockney Rhyming Slang Phrases Part 1

Part 2

In a previous post I went into Cockney rhyming slang history and gave some tips on how to use it.

In this post I’ll give you some commonly used Cockney rhyming slang phrases, phrases that I find funny, as well as some phrases that I think would be useful for Spider-Verse fic writers specifically.

So let’s get started!

A-B

Adam and Eve - Believe

E.g. “I don’t Adam and Eve it!”

Apples and Pears - Stairs

E.g. “He fell down the apples.”

Aunt Joanna - Piano

E.g. “Play me a song on the old Joanna!” Or “Get on the Joanna and we’ll have a sing song!”

Barnet Fair - Hair

E.g. “How do I fit my barnet under my mask? Wouldn’t you like to know.”

This is a very common Cockney phrase; you’ll hear a lot of true Cockneys talking about getting their barnet done.

Barney Rubble - Trouble

E.g. “Looks like someone’s lookin’ for a Barney!”

Bread and Honey - Money

E.g. “I ain’t got enough bread for that.”

Bird Lime - Time (in prison)

E.g. “He’s doin’ bird.”

Bird lime is a sticky substance you spread on trees to catch birds (now illegal, thankfully). You can understand why people relate it to feeling trapped.

Boat Race - Face

E.g. “He’s got a handsome boat!” Or “Shut your boat!” Or “I’m not just gonna show you my boat race, mate. Secret identity and all that.”

Bottle and Glass

I’m going to let you figure this one out.

E.g. “Look at the bottle on that guy!” Or “I slipped on the steps and went bottle over tit!”

Brass Tacks - Facts

E.g. “Let’s get down to brass tacks!”*

*Some people think that this phrase originates from the Cockney rhyming slang, however others say that it is referring to brass tacks used in upholstery or tacks that were hammered into sales counters to indicate measuring points. I don’t have the answer.

Brown Bread - Dead

E.g. “He’s brown bread!”

This is an example of a Cockney rhyming slang phrase that you don’t abbreviate. You always say “brown bread” and never just “brown”.

Bubble Bath - Laugh

E.g. “Are you having a bubble?”

This is meant more in an irritated sense rather than joyful laughter, like saying “You must be joking!” Or “Are you having a laugh?”

Butchers Hook - Look

E.g. “Let’s have a butchers at that.” Or “Take a quick butchers at this!”

It’s good to keep in mind that there can be multiple Cockney rhyming slang phrases for the same word, as well as multiple Cockney rhyming slang phrases that start with the same word. For example, ‘Birds Nest” and “Bristol and West” both mean chest, and “Birds Nest” and “Bird Lime” both can be abbreviated to “Bird”. For the latter, context is important for knowing what someone is talking about.

As always, I’m not an expert; a true Cockney would know far more than I do. I just want to share the knowledge that I have. I hope that someone will find this helpful, informative, or entertaining at the very least.

I’ve got more Cockney rhyming slang phrases coming, but if there’s any other areas of British slang you’d like me to go into, let me know and I’ll see what I can do!

Happy writing and happy speaking!

My other British slang posts: Cockney Rhyming Slang, British Police Slang, Terms of Endearment, Innit VS In’t - a PSA

#hobie brown #spider punk #atsv #hobie brown fanfiction #writing help #cockney rhyming slang #british slang #fic help #across the spiderverse #hobie brown fanart #writing #writing tips #comic #language #I messed up the alphabetical order #my bad #just one of those things that reminds me I’m dyslexic

[bisexualnonsense]

My partner made a comment about how this episode fed into “bury your gays” and like, while his heart was in the right place with the critique, I felt so strongly the opposite way

Like on its face, yes, two gay men died…. But like, in a show about a zombie apocalypse where we’re tracking at least 1 Major Character Death per episode, Bill & Frank are triumphant compared to every other character. They got to live to be old and gray together after a life of relatively peaceful flourishing. They chose their deaths on their own terms, a luxury most people don’t get in this world. They got to die together, in each others arms, neither left to live and suffer alone. They got to go with dignity, autonomy, and love, in peace, together. They got to choose. They made their end meaningful. They were happy and satisfied and fulfilled. Everything that gay characters are so often not afforded in life, much less in death.

Not only that, but narratively speaking, their deaths were used in exact opposition to “bury your gays.” The trope was created to reinforce that being gay is a sin, that gays must die as punishment for their evil ways. It’s intended to be a narrative consequence, the moral of the story, a warning to its audience.

But the deaths of Bill and Frank were used as closure to a story arc about living a happy, fulfilled life with your partner. Even further than that, their arc was used to demonstrate that there is meaning in life because we choose to create meaning, that purpose is found in each other, in loving someone, even at the end of the world. They are held up as an example of what to strive for, of a reason to keep living, of something to pursue. It is completely antithetical to bury your gays and is in fact a brilliant subversion of it in that it grounds the purpose of the narrative itself.

Tl;dr: TLOU really said love wins.

#the last of us #tlou #hbo the last of us #hbo tlou #the last of us spoilers #bill and frank #look I’m still a mess but I’m SO glad it didn’t end with bill getting shot and dying right there #the gays stay winning #the absolute best way to go is together with your partner in their arms in peace #this is my hill and I’m dying on it #this just means a lot to me ok #truly the representation we deserved #berry your gays

[limepigeon]

after trying to upload this 6 times with various dimensions and tumblr still insisting on making it blurry I give up, here it is

#bg3 gale #bg3 #Gale #gale dekarios #bg3 fanart #baldurs gate 3 #I spent too long on this and then tumblr picture quality keeps messing it up I’m cry

[bingqiv]

i think there’s an inherent sadness and pain about dhawan coming after gomez. like gomez’s master had finally became friends with the doctor again despite everything. she died for him (twice if we count simm’s). after so long they finally stood together on the same page with mutual understanding and a hope that their next lives would be kinder and perhaps they’d be standing together.

yet dhawan went home after regenerating. came to the understanding that he was nothing to the doctor but a speck in her past. just as small and tiny as her companions and the flood of insecurities that haunted him since the day he left came back. he was never an equal and never would be and the doctor knew it (had known it all along). so he had to make himself an equal and worthy enough to stand against the doctor (never with. for how can you stand with the sun. instead you have to eclipse it take away its warmth and life)

a post-gomez dhawan is just fun.

#fun but i’m a mess over him #the universe could never have them stand together for long it would probably implode or something #also thirteen doesn’t do anything to disprove the dhawan’s unravelling which makes me sad and instead makes it worse #the only exception is o which is wild that the doctor is always instinctively drawn to the master’s disguises #i need to write my master/thoschei essay #thoschei #the master #the doctor #dw #doctor who #dhawan!master #gomez!master