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#i’m probably being way too dramatic of course
exopelagic · 2 months
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bittersweet sequel to ice hockey is great post <3
#man. I love my hockey friends#next week will be our last sessions running the club. which is so messed up how has it been a year#and we all got pizza tonight and turns out a bunch of them got together to get the three of us flowers and chocolate which was so sweet#I love them all so much I’m so happy I did this#but god idk#rn is a flux period. in more and more ways now we found out tonight the future of the club is Very very uncertain on basically all sides#so it’s not like I’m gonna stop being involved in running it bc one of my best friends is now president so like. I’m being there for him#and I gotta sort a bunch of shit anyway bc it’s gonna be a rough few months#but also in that like. i will FINALLY get told my masters supervisor in the next few days.#and which one I get WILL change the course of my life in a big way like I’m not being dramatic saying that#so it’s been hard to think abt what the future will look like and that’s been on my mind#and also god I just love my friends so much and I am Scared of the future. I probably shouldn’t be. probably. but everything feels weird#me and closest friend here Will be living on opposite sides of the city again next year and she won’t be doing ice hockey as much#so we’ll see each other maybe less unless we make more effort. and we do already we see each other a bunch and we text#god I’m bad at endings. I’m way too sentimental and the flux periods are so good for low level anxiety like this#I’m also worried for her bc her boyfriend graduates this year and is gonna do a masters in Australia. which is insane.#and I think they both know they can’t do long distance like that and he’ll be there for two? years? maybe one? but like. shit.#they just Know this is coming and I am terrified for them both. in the way that tonight I recorded them skate-dancing together bc I knew#they’d both want that memory#I’m just having a hard time thinking abt what my future is gonna look like and that’s kinda hard on me bc so many things are changing#simultaneously. like I have my last lectures ever on Monday bc my course finishes teaching early. like that’s insane#I’ve done almost a whole degree. and I’ve been running this club for a year. and I’m abt to start a whole new thing and I don’t know what#idk. I’ll find out what the future looks like I just gotta take it a day at a time but that’s Hard. which is how it works I think#point is I love my friends and I think I’m going to miss this time a lot#even if a lot of things have sucked very bad this past year. a lot haven’t and this has also changed my life. which is messed up to think#and I do know a good chunk of things!! like two of my friends are sticking around another 2 years here which I didn’t expect and I know#where + who I’m living with. and I know vaguely what the Shape of the next maybe 4ish years are. bc I know I’m taking a year out to work#and then doing a phd. I’m pretty sure that’s what I’m doing and if not I have time to adjust to that too#I know that I’ll be studying smth I rlly like no matter what happens. and I know I’ll be able to see a lot of my friends a lot more#luke.txt
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lovebugism · 6 months
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ok reader x eddie having a casual conversation about sex, talking about what they're both into, leading to some smut??? just hearing what eddie's into sounds so hottttt (i imagine its filthy,, sorry)
ty for requesting! hope you like it!! — a failed date with eddie leads to a night in and several confessions (established relationship, mostly fluff, talks of sex but no actual smut 18+, 1.6k)
fictober (㇏(•̀ᵥᵥ•́)ノ)
Eddie Munson is a hopeless romantic.
Not because he loves like it’s breathing (though some would argue otherwise), but because his attempts to be affectionate with you are complete and utter failures.
He had a whole romantic day planned. A late lunch, a quick walk, and then sunset at the park. Honestly, it probably would’ve been a pretty metal date if it was any day other than this one — the biggest flood of the whole goddamn year.
You got to the diner just fine but had to rush back to the trailer in the rain since he didn’t have his van. Thankfully, it waited to outright pour until he got you home. Now, his leather jacket — which you’d used as a makeshift umbrella — hangs beside the opened window to dry.
The orange autumn breeze rolls over your bare bodies like silk (because, of course, an innocent shower after getting drenched in the rain couldn’t not end in getting dirty again).
“Was all this just a ploy to get me into bed?” you tease, tracing the freckles on his back with the tip of your finger. “’Cause you coulda just asked, you know? I would’ve said yes.”
Lying flat on his stomach, Eddie laughs into his folded-up arms. His deep brown hair brushes his pale shoulders when he turns to look at you. His smile is swollen and rosy and crooked.
“You got me, princess. Making my girlfriend walk in disgusting weather was all a part of my evil plan.”
“I wouldn’t say it was evil.”
“No?”
“Sinful, maybe. Sexy, even,” you joke with a lopsided grin. “But no, not evil.”
“Is that so?” he lilts as he rises on his elbow to prop his cheek on his fist.
You shake your head and roll onto your back. Your eyes flit to the spotted ceiling. A smirk blossoms on your lips. “I feel like evil would imply that it was hurtful in some way. And that thing you did in the shower felt way too good to be evil.”
“What thing?” the boy wonders with pinched-together brows.
You shoot him a look. “You know…” you hum vaguely, expectantly.
“No. I don’t, actually,” Eddie laughs, mostly at himself. “I’m kinda dumb, in case you forgot.”
“You’re not dumb, Eds.”
“Stop being sweet. You’re deflecting.”
You concede with a small huff. “That… That thing. With your mouth. When you pressed me against the wall and— please, don’t make me describe it, Eddie,” you ramble, then cut yourself off to whine.
He meets your grimace with a boyish grin. “I don’t know. I kinda like hearing you talk about it.”
“I’ll die,” you deadpan.
“You’re so dramatic.”
His words are harsh, but his pink smile is kind. He kisses you with it after — a smacking peck to the corner of your mouth that migrates rather quickly. He sprinkles his lips along your jaw and chin and neck. 
That’s where he lingers. 
Eddie finds your pulse point and goes a half-inch higher, just like he did while he was fucking you against the shower wall. You nearly came the first time he kissed you there. 
He sucks at the delicate skin until he leaves another faint mark. The feeling of his tongue and teeth on your newfound sweet spot makes your toes curl. It has you moaning out loud before you mean to.
His lips audibly smack when he pulls away.
“That thing?” he wonders, smiling down at you like he already knows the answer.
Your thighs clench together. Your bones are made of mush. “That thing,” you repeat in the affirmative.
“Well, if we’re sharing secrets…” Eddie singsongs, then leans in all close like he’s about to spill the latest gossip. His fingers spread out along your bare waist, eyes sparkling with mischief. “I really liked it when you got all mean.”
You hadn’t thought much of it, then — when Eddie edged you on the counter with his fingers and laughed when you writhed. 
You didn’t even let him make it up to you after, just sucked him off and told him he wasn’t allowed to touch you. “Don’t cum ’til I tell you to, understand?” you’d said. “Or I’m gonna get myself off, and you’re gonna watch.”
He was a good boy for you, though, and you let him fuck you in the shower.
Your nose scrunches in muted embarrassment. “I wasn’t being that mean, was I?”
“No. I mean, you could certainly get meaner…” Eddie assures with a shake of his head, then grins as his fingers crawl up your ribcage. You fight back a shiver. “Which I think could be preferable from time to time.”
“So, you want me to be more… dominant?”
He shrugs a pale, freckled shoulder. “Yeah. Sometimes. I like watching you get all dumb for me, don’t get me wrong, but every time you get a little mean, I almost cum in my pants.”
The blatant confession makes you go slightly stupid. You just nod at him, lazy and unblinking. “Yeah. I can do that. You know, if that’s what you want.”
“I do want,” Eddie hums, matching your sloppy head shake. His nicotine-coated breath fans across your cheek. “Very, very much.”
“But not all the time, though, right?”
“No. Not all the time. Just… sometimes— when the moment’s right or whatever.”
“Sure…”
Eddie’s grin broadens when you trail off. A faraway look glazes over your eye. His brows raise expectantly. “What’s that look for?”
You blink rapidly as you descend from the clouds. Shaking your head, you dismiss him. “Nothing. Nothing— I just… I did kinda like not letting you come right away.”
“Yeah. Me too,” Eddie concurs, suddenly breathless.
Your gaze flits to his, mousy and twinkling. Your hands fidget above the covers. “And I kinda wanna try letting you cum and maybe… not stopping…”
Eddie’s eyes go wide. His mouth opens to respond, but he forgets how to speak. He barely remembers to breathe.
“Is that… Is that weird?” you ask, forcing a laugh at his unusual silence.
“No!” he blurts, sounding much louder in the honeyed quiet of his bedroom. “No, that’s… That’s really hot, actually. Like, really hot.”
He zones out just like you had. The imagery of it all makes his stomach whirl. He’s done it to you a number of times — brought you to the edge and kept on pushing you over until you pushed him away. But he’d never thought about ever doing it to himself till now. 
Actually, there’s quite a lot of things he’s done to you that he might enjoy himself if he thinks about it.
The thought alone opens a world of possibility in his wild, wild head.
“Can I tell you about something I was thinking about the other day?” he wonders suddenly.
Though slightly startled by the blurted question, you nod. “Of course.”
His gaze flits away from yours. His hand fidgets at your waist, fingers softly scratching at your burning skin. “You know my handcuffs? The ones I clip on my jeans sometimes?”
Again, you nod.
“Well, I— I have the keys, you know? So it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if we— you know— if we used them…”
“On me?” you press, brows pinched in distant concern.
Eddie shakes his head immediately. “No. I know you don’t like that.”
“So… on you?”
“Yeah. Maybe. If you want,” the boy mumbles, suddenly shy in a way you’ve only seen a handful of times — including earlier, when he was begging to cum in your mouth. “I just think it could be cool, you know? Like, you could tie me up and just… use me. If you want,” he repeats.
“Use you?” you repeat with a soft laugh.
He shrugs. “Yeah. I mean, I don’t— I don’t really care about getting off as much as I care about you getting off, you know? I just… wanna take care of you. Want you to take what you want.”
You open your mouth to respond only to find that all words have lost meaning. Your brain is a jumbled mess of alphabet soup. So you just nod, dumb at the very thought.
Eddie’s hand rises from the covers. His palm settles warm at your jaw. His fingers smell faintly of sex as his calloused thumb smooths across your chapped lips. “You could, like, rub yourself on my cock. Get yourself off on top of me,” he murmurs lowly to you, a quiet and crooked grin pulling at his mouth. “Wouldn’t that be metal?”
“Yeah…” you answer with a sigh, getting lost in the daydream right along with him. “Wouldn’t put you inside me at first, either. Not until you’re begging for it.”
His smile widens. “Exactly.”
“Then I’ll ride you until you make me cum.”
Eddie nods, egging you on. He tucks his face into your neck, if only to conceal how ardently he’s blushing. He hides his pink cheeks between your jaw and shoulder and kisses you where he knows it’ll drive you crazy. 
“Mhmm?” he urges, muffled.
You sigh a faint moan. Your fingers curl in his wild hair. You press your lips to his temple and continue. “And I’ll let you come, too. Eventually… But I won’t stop.”
“Fuck,” he groans into your pulse.
“Not until you’ve filled me up three times—”
“Oh, fuck…”
You tug at his hair with a soft, stern touch you think you could learn to master for him. His lips click faintly when he parts from you. He blinks down at you with glassy chocolate eyes.
“Something like that?” you wonder, feigning innocence with a sweet-sounding lilt.
Eddie nods, sloppy and stupid. He stammers. “Yeah… Yeah. Some—Something like that.”
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curseddollfaye · 1 month
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Imagine Gojo as a girl dad and his little twin comes home from school one day after a long day of preschool. Her white hair pulled up in two pig tails as she chatters your ear off when you pulled up home and unlock the front door. Your laugh muffled by your hand as you walk down the hall with your daughter skipping ahead of you.
“Papa! Guess what!” She yells as soon as she spots him in the kitchen, already preparing her favorite after school snack; Dino nuggets and ketchup
“Princess! Oh daddy missed you soooo much!” Your husband as dramatic as ever helps her remove her backpack and put her lunchbox to the side as he lifts her up and tosses her little body in the air. The kitchen echoing with the sounds of your daughter content with being in the safe arms of her father.
“What is it you want to tell me hmm?” He presses a big smack of a kiss to her forehead as he moves to fix her plate for her while she waits on the island counter. A cheeky smile on her face which scares you sometimes on how much it looks exactly like Gojo.
“Go ahead baby tell daddy what happened at school” You nonchalantly him fixing a pigtail.
Your daughters eyes sparkle as a plate of nuggets as ketchup is presented to her. Taking t-Rex shape and generously dipping it into her ketchup. “I’m getting married Papa” She says it so seriously it’s comical how Gojo’s brightened up face falls.
You swear you see the last of air escape his lungs, leaving the man breathless and stressed.
By a four year old.
“W-what? To who?!”
“Jack! He goes to my school Papa!” She laughs as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
Of course she wanted a wedding just like the pictures her mama showed her from their family picture album.
“Well you can’t get married” You snort a laugh as he sends you a glare. How can you laugh at times like these? Your little girl is fixated on getting married to some bastard 4 year old who probably says the same thing to all the other little girls! That just won’t do.
“Im going to need to have a talk with him”
“No papa you can’t until the wedding! Oh by the way, I needs some monies” Gojo’s twin mumbles.
The act the same too You think watching the gears in Gojo’s head turn.
“Well you can’t get married” He shrugs
“Why?” your daughter frowns.
“Ah man you havent heard? They just ran out of weddings baby girl. Who knows when they’ll restock”
“Oh” his sweet baby frowns, he swears he sees her almost tear up but he quickly intervenes.
The next best thing next to a wedding.
“But daddy will take you out for some ice cream and buy another toy you can pick out! You wanted that new bluey toy this morning right? The one from the tv?”
“Satoru she just got that massive Barbie dream house delivered the other day she doesn’t need-“
“Yay!” Your daughter squeals and tosses herself into her fathers arms.
Problem solved for now , weddings are discontinued in your house until further notice…
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mooshywrites · 3 months
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Could I request headcanons for Astarion, Gale, Wyll, Halsin, Dammon, Rolan, and Zevlor react to his shy gender neutral crush accidentally sitting on his lap? They get off immediately while apologising the moment they realised!
A/N - Ahhhhh this prompt idea is so adorable ;-;!!!!!
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Masterlist
Art commissions
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Astarion -
~ Astarion would definitely not let you forget something like this.
~ After a particularly hard day full of fighting, I can see the whole camp deciding to relax and pass around one or two (or a case) of wine.
~ The alcohol goes straight to your head and you’re tripping over your feet in no time. This isn’t a problem, that is until… you stumble and trip your way right into Astarion’s lap
~ Your cheeks get all red, your words coming out with a plethora of excuses and Astarion basks in your embarrassment with glee.
~ He’s secretly loving it for another reason, that being the closeness of you against him now. You’ve been much too shy up to this point to even look him in the eye, let alone touch him
~ You’re falling over yourself trying to get up, apologizing more times than anyone can count and of course Astarion has all the petty things anyone could ever say
~ “If you wanted a place on my lap, you need only ask, darling.”
~ He loves it even more the next morning when he notices that now you can’t even look in his general direction without turning a beautiful shade of red
Gale -
~ Gale would be all jokes if you accidentally sat on him, trying his best to ease the awkward tension
~ “You know, I always thought I looked like an awkwardly plush chair” he would tease, lending a hand to help you up
~ I think he would love the flush to your cheeks, knowing you’re absolutely mortified by the experience.
~ He wouldn’t tell a soul about it, not even in jest. He knows how shy you are and knows the accident would only embarrass you further if your other companions caught wind of it, even if part of him wanted to brag
~ Instead, he would playfully point out ever tripping hazard while with you, leaving it an inside joke between the two of you
Wyll -
~ I can definitely see you losing your balance while practicing a difficult attack, landing right into the Devil’s lap
~ Wyll would be as charming as ever about the whole situation, making a dramatic flourish as he “caught you”
~ He’d probably rave on and on about how the ‘Blade of the Frontiers’ often had to catch damsels in distress as they fell into his awaiting arms. Everyone else may think this was because he was a braggart, but you knew deep down he did it to ease your embarrassment
~He would definitely be kind enough to ignore your reddened cheeks, whispering that everything was absolutely alright as you shot up practically shouting an “I’m sorry”
~ From that moment on, though, he always made sure to be the closest one to you, making sure he’d be there if you needed a knight in shining armor’s lap to save you again
Halsin -
~ You would be immensely tired after a long day of traveling, not even looking where your feet planted as you plopped down on what you thought was a log.
~ You practically jump out of your skin when strong arms wrap around you casually, Halsin continuing on his conversation with the others as if nothing happened
~ You would feel the red hot embarrassment in every nerve of your body, hissing to Halsin to let go, apologizing for sitting on him
~ He would cling on for a few moments, letting out a deep chuckle at your blunder
~ “Think nothing of it, my heart, I simply thought you wanted to sit somewhere softer than the ground. Would you prefer to sit on me if I were a bear?”
~ You couldn’t even answer him, smacking his chest and jumping out of his arms
~ Thank goodness it was dark, you wouldn’t want anyone seeing the goofy smile on your face paired with the knowing grin on the gentle giant elf
Dammon -
~ Dammon would be so generously kind as you accidentally sat on him, helping you back up, worried he made you uncomfortable
~ He would definitely be the only one to be more embarrassed than you, his cheeks the exact same shade of red. He’d try to play it off, but the cracks in his voice gave it away immediately
~ Both of you would be an adorable mess of apologies and stutters, trying to ignore how nice it was to be that close only moments earlier.
~ He would finally clear his throat, trying to change the subject as the red in his cheeks began to even seep down to his neck.
~ You both finally relaxed a little, smiling relieved smiles
~ That is until a very loud, very obvious Astarion would gesture between the two of you, “When the hell are you two going to finally admit you like each other! Seriously, this is getting difficult to watch”
~ It would take days before the you and Dammon could make it through a conversation without sounding like a bumbling lovesick kit after that
Rolan -
~ If anyone could be more awkward than Dammon when you sat on his lap, it would absolutely be Rolan. Apparently the invisibility spell he was trying out worked a little too well.
~ You would let out a shriek as you sat down, expecting the chair to feel… well… like a chair. You spun around to an apologetic smile and hands held up in defense
~ Both of you would choke out an “im sorry” at the same time, giggling a little breathlessly
~ “What the hell were you doing as a chair?” You’d complain, trying to swallow away the embarrassment, not knowing it was written across all of your features
~ “We’ll, technically, I wasn’t a chair” He’d say defensively, his cheeks turning a deeper shade of his already crimson skin
~ Neither of you spoke of it after, but you definitely didn’t miss the way Rolan seemed extra attentive in the days after
Zevlor -
~ Zevlor would be sickly sweet about all of it, a little disappointed when you didn’t stay for more than a moment
~ You’d make up for that when your sweet quiet voice would squeak out some apologies, eyes looking anywhere but him. He so very loved when you were embarrassed like this
~ He’d brush it off quickly, pulling up your hand to kiss it gently
~ This would make you blush more but that was probably his whole goal to begin with
~ “I’m completely at your disposal.” He’d say, taking every opportunity to memorize the shy smile you gave him
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rensblade · 4 months
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𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐃.
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⟢ warnings/notes: husband! jing yuan x gender neutral! reader. toothrotting fluff, cute domestic banter tbh. husband yuan nation, please rise. not proofread, we die like tingyun. might be ooc. pls lmk if i got any of the hsr terminology wrong.. appreciate any type of feedback & please please pleaseee send me reqs if u have any ✩
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“beloved, am i really that bad of a general?”
the all too familiar baritone of your husband’s voice fills in your ears, as you raise your gaze from the distance, only to watch him sulk from where he was sat upon the seat of divine foresight.
to anyone that squints, would be graced upon a phenomenon all too odd— jing yuan, one of seven arbiter generals, pouting.
“and what.. exactly makes you think so, ‘yuan?” you already knew the answer, but you still entertained the fact he was pouting, almost comically the same way yanqing does, when you deny him from making impulsive sword purchases.. or the same way mimi, your household lion, scrunches up her face and paws at your clothes when you tell her that she won't get any more snacks for the night.
said man sits up from where he's at, and abruptly makes his way down to where you're seated— at his desk. sorting through some of the things unattended earlier during his earlier escapade to fyxestroll garden.
“well.. you know.” he deadpans, staring down at you. you have to keep in a giggle, finding the way he waited so patiently for you to finish with the work at your side, almost akin to your precious lion who does the same.
you heave a sigh, but in an amused way, as you stack the last documents into a neat pile and turn in your chair, and upon being graced with your attention; your lover nearly falls dramatically into your arms.
“i can't help but think i should just hand over my resignation early. you know what, fu xuan probably saw this coming,” he fake-wails, as you caress his hair, cooing at the man who was currently at your feet.
eventually, he relents, when you tug a little hard on his fluffy white mane. “darling.. is this about cirrus?” the mere mention of the heliobus makes jing yuan glower, and you practically have to bite back your laughter at the expression, opting to clear your throat instead.
he stays silent for a second, then scrunches his face. “..absolutely not,” he retaliates in a serious tone. then, he slumps forward again, almost nuzzling into your lap as he tries to hypothesize. “it's just. i need some constructive criticism, before i actually hand over my position to someone else, you know,” he reasons, but you know better.
“right, why of course.” you humor him a little bit longer. pushing the general’s buttons has always been your favorite past time activity.
he pulls away, getting on his feet before he gathers your hands into his and gives you a solemn look. “you get me, my love. this is why we're married.”
that makes you crack a smile. jing yuan only raises a brow, but returns the smile nevertheless, a little hesitant. “yuan, i love you, but. you mean solid constructive criticism like.. i don't know, maybe it's about time you retired and took a big fat cat nap?” you suggest with a snort, and jing yuan simply huffs. (yeah, mimi definitely got the attitude from her dad).
you shake your head, dragging him to sit next to you as you elaborated. “in all seriousness.. you're not a bad general. not a bad mentor, father or husband, jing yuan. don't let that silly heliobi’s words get to your head.” the tall man, lets you cup his face, squishing his cheeks as you pepper kisses across them, as if to prove your point.
he simply gathers your form up into his arms, holding you tightly and you can't help but relax into the warmth he emits. he's truly a big cat. “you know, i’m starting to think this must be how birds that nest in your hair must feel.” you point out with a false-huff, after a minute of silence.
jing yuan chuckles at that, purposely tugging you by the waist; flush closer against his torso as he nuzzles into you— pale locks of his hair cloud your vision. “why, of course. a wise, little sparrow, you are.” he snuggles against you, golden eyes softening as they examine your reactions. “in fact, my favorite.” the baritone of his words send a pleasant wave of warmth through your body, you can feel him smile against your skin as he litters little kisses here and there.
to be fair, if you were held prisoner in his gentle yet steady hold forever, you were more than willing to be reduced to a mere bird, for eternity. okay, and maybe you would miss making snarky rebuttals at the general, but that's about it.
as you're resting yourself against him, a thought crosses your mind, and you'd bask in the silent affection but your loud thoughts cut you short. “and for the record, you still should've let me kick cirrus’s butt.” as expected, a hearty laugh booms from the man’s chest, the vibrations making your body tingle.
“i love you.” he says, practically purring, as the gigantic man nuzzles even further into the crevice of your neck, pressing yet another kiss to the spot he loves. his hair tickles your neck, but you love the familiarity of it all.
what a heavenly life you live, as the general’s personal songbird.
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rensblade, 2023. please do not steal my writings or headers, i put a lot of effort into this. reblogs & comments are appreciated! pls send me asks/reqs, i write for most genshin or hsr or jjk characters as of now. thank u once again <3
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loveinhawkins · 25 days
Text
ao3
About twenty minutes into the hike, Steve hears Eddie’s breathing change.
They’re bringing up the rear, but they’re still close enough for some of the group’s conversations to be within earshot—Robin and Nancy leading in a silently agreed upon formation, despite Dustin holding the compass. That way, no matter what, the kids are shielded.
Speaking of the kids, they’re currently having a passionate discussion about who among them will reach the Gate the fastest—and yeah, there’s not a chance in hell that’s happening, Steve thinks, but they don’t need to know that yet.
It’s when the debate specifically turns to who’s the best swimmer that he notices the switch in Eddie’s breathing, air sucked in through clenched teeth. A glance behind confirms Steve’s suspicions; Eddie’s breaking away from the party, his face white, eyes steadfastly on the forest floor.
Steve leaves him be, doesn’t draw any attention to it—but he keeps watch in his peripheral, so he spots exactly when Eddie staggers off, soon swallowed up by the trees. He can still hear his footsteps, though, which is reassuring.
Slowly, making sure it seems casual, Steve bends down and picks up the smallest rock he can find, rubs his thumb across it to make sure the edges are smooth enough.
He throws, hits his target: the back of Dustin’s head.
Predictably, Dustin whirls around, mouth already open to voice his indignation.
Steve quickly puts a finger to his lips.
While Dustin doesn’t look all that thrilled about it, he obligingly stays silent. He’s damn quick on the uptake, of course; Steve can see the spark of understanding in his eyes when he notices that Eddie is missing.
He steps forward with urgency, but Steve’s just as quick to shake his head.
No, it’s okay. I’m on it.
He knows it’s not a coincidence that Eddie left so quietly—that having the kids see him in another moment of vulnerability is probably too much to handle on top of the ongoing nightmare he’s found himself in. Steve gets it; God, if he were in Eddie’s shoes, he’d be taking any opportunity that he could to get some privacy.
Even without words, it’s obvious that Dustin wants to protest, frowning hard.
Steve raises an eyebrow meaningfully. Dude, trust me.
Dustin heaves a silent, dramatic sigh, but he nods all the same.
Steve gestures for the water bottle Dustin’s got in his backpack. Mimes for Dustin to throw it to him.
Dustin brings out the bottle, but doesn’t throw it immediately, like he’s doubtful Steve will make the catch.
Steve rolls his eyes. Seriously? Dickhead.
Dustin rolls his eyes right back.
When he throws the bottle, Steve catches it one-handed as a point of pride.
Dustin’s theatrics grow: he gasps, all slack-jawed, wide-eyed disbelief; Steve flips him off.
Then Dustin taps his watch deliberately.
Steve softens, gives him a brief thumbs up before following where Eddie went. He looks back a couple of times, reassured by the sight of Robin and Nancy stopping and rearranging themselves so the group formation is kept up in his absence.
It doesn’t take long to find Eddie. He hears him first, harsh, bitten off retching—and while that’s not exactly a surprise, the sound still makes Steve’s heart sink.
Eddie’s doubled over, leaning against a tree with one hand. Steve feels a sudden impulse to pull his hair back for him but resists it—remembers Eddie violently flinching away from any touch in the boathouse.
So he just makes sure his presence is nice and obvious without being overwhelming—takes leisurely, even footsteps. He sits down opposite, just close enough that Eddie could reach out if he needed to.
But he doesn’t. He’s barely stopped retching before he’s trying to straighten up, grip slipping against the bark. Steve winces at the thought of splinters digging into his palm.
“Woah, man, take it easy—”
“M’fine,” Eddie mutters. He scoffs harshly, wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. He’s shaking. “This is kinda normal for me now.”
His head’s still half bowed, hair falling across his face like he doesn’t want to be seen. It doesn’t stop Steve from noticing the evidence of tears on his face; he thinks they’re simply from the exertion of throwing up, but he can’t be sure.
“Just—just give yourself a minute,” Steve says. “We’ve got time.”
He stretches out right there on the ground, slow and deliberate. It takes a second or two before Eddie—after another wobbly attempt at standing—mirrors him: sinking down until he’s sat, back pressed up against the tree trunk.
Steve listens to his breathing. It’s lost that nauseated gritted teeth sound, but it hitches once, twice, and then—
“I can’t stop—” Eddie covers his face with his hands.
Steve shuffles closer. “You’re okay.”
But Eddie shakes his head. He drops his hands, leans his head back against the tree. His eyes are distant. Haunted. Steve doesn’t need to guess about what he’s seeing.
“Eddie—”
“You know the funniest thing?” Eddie gasps out, like it isn’t funny at all. “I keep thinking if—if only I hadn’t ditched swimming lessons, I might’ve l-learned something fucking useful.”
At a loss for what to say, Steve tries for something normal. Thinks back to high school, something far away from all of this…
“You showed up to swimming,” he says. “I remember.”
He does, though it’s faint.
Honestly, he spent as little time as he could changing in the showers, wanting to make the most out of time in the pool. He didn’t even goof off with Tommy H or any of the other guys, preferring to do solo laps in the deep end. It was repetitive, calming; he treated it like a vacation from the adrenaline of being on the swim team.
Then came that November, and the whole routine became an escape from much more.
Eddie gives him a look that might’ve passed for amusement at one point, if his breathing wasn’t still so shallow.
“Yeah, I—I showed up for, like, the first week, Harrington. Fucking Lewinsky stole my clothes, you only let that kinda thing happen once.”
“I’m sorry,” Steve says sincerely. “I didn’t know.”
A wan flicker of a smile passes across Eddie’s face. “Of course you didn’t,” he says. It’s not an accusation. “You were, like, way too busy being part fish.”
Steve huffs a laugh through his nose, but Eddie doesn’t join in. Instead his breathing quickens, like the distraction of high school hasn’t been nearly enough.
“It’s just—I should’ve been more—should’ve known h-how to—” He shakes his head again. Swallows. “After Chr—”
He chokes on her name.
Steve reaches out, only to hesitate and leave his hand hovering in the air between them. “Hey, man, there’s nothing you could’ve—”
“What if it’s not a coincidence?” Eddie whispers. “What if there’s—there’s a… there’s gotta be a reason that—that it’s me.”
Steve moves closer still. Draws back at the last second; Eddie’s still trembling.
“That’s bullshit,” Steve says firmly.
Eddie laughs bitterly. “Is it? D-don’t fucking kid yourself, Harrington, s’not exactly looking good. Two people died r-right in front of me, and I just…” He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes. “I’d arrest me.”
“Stop, would you just—”
“Come on, man. You’ve gotta know, even if Wheeler and Buckley are still too polite to say it.” Eddie’s voice is soft in resignation. “I’m just wasting your time.”
It’s Steve’s turn to scoff. “Do you seriously think we’d be doing all of this if we thought you were a lost cause?”
Eddie shrugs, the sleeves of his leather jacket scraping against the bark. “There’s only so many signs a guy can ignore, right? Hell, even my watch has stopped, like I’m literally outta fucking time.”
“Okay, no wonder you failed English,” Steve says, “that is overwrought as shit, dude.”
The jab doesn’t quite land—his barely concealed worry just makes him sound sharp. Fraught.
But Eddie’s eyes widen in surprise, and he finally seems speechless, and this is it, Steve realises, the one chance he has to get through to him.
“Nothing prepares you for this shit, Eddie,” he says—thinks of 1983, of seeing the impossible. Terrified out of his mind. “I mean it, there’s nothing you could’ve done. Nothing,” he adds pointedly, when it looks like Eddie might protest. “Chrissy, Patrick, it’s fucking awful what they—but it’s not—not a, um. Not a reflection on—it’s not your fault.”
It’s not enough, Steve knows it—feels acutely like a shitty school guidance counsellor, only able to parrot empty platitudes. He has to dig deeper.
He looks at Eddie directly, unflinching. Can read the fear lurking in his eyes, the one he keeps dancing around.
A fierce emotion floods Steve’s chest—like being flung into the deep end without warning, the water already over your head before you can take a breath.
He’s felt it before, mixed up in a wave of anger as he watched Powell raise that goddamn picture to the camera.
Don’t you go believing a word this town says about you, Eddie Munson. Don’t you dare.
Steve braves a touch, places a hand on Eddie’s knee. Eddie doesn’t move.
“You’re not the curse, Eddie. There’s nothing wrong with you.”
Eddie shudders. He looks away, but not quick enough to hide the definite tears this time.
Steve waits. He doesn’t move his hand for a long moment.
When Eddie’s finished roughly wiping at his face with his sleeve, Steve hands over the water bottle. He’s silently relieved that Eddie takes it without a fight, like accepting even this smallest amount of help means there’s still a part of him that hasn’t given up yet.
There’s still hope.
After a few sips, Eddie sets the water bottle aside. He’s breathing deeper now, and when he looks up, his eyes have that keen, almost analytical gaze.
“What’s…?” he murmurs, and then he’s the one that’s reaching out, as if without thinking, fingertips lightly brushing against Steve’s forehead.
He feels cold, Steve thinks. Like he’s still half frozen from falling into the lake.
“Did you… cut yourself on something?” Eddie says.
Steve’s about to say no automatically before he remembers.
“Right, yeah. Um, our flashlights kinda… exploded when…”
He trails off. Watches with sympathy as Eddie fills in the gaps.
“Oh,” Eddie says very quietly.
He keeps following the trail of the cut—Steve can still feel the chill of him: the light pressure travelling across his skin, like Eddie needs the motion to stay calm.
“Ow,” Eddie says, hushed, almost as if it happened to him, too. “You’re lucky you didn’t get glass in your eye, dude.”
Steve doesn’t say what he’s thinking—that he’d have dealt with it, that he would’ve been fine—because he thinks he understands: that maybe by focusing on something small, it helps keep Eddie here, temporarily blocks out the sight of Chrissy and Patrick’s deaths.
He checks his watch. They’re just creeping up on fifteen minutes; they’d better make tracks soon.
He stands but not abruptly, conscious of not rushing Eddie unnecessarily.
“If we cut across, uh, this way,” he demonstrates with one hand as Eddie gets to his feet, “we’ll catch up pretty quick. Don’t need Henderson’s compass to tell me the way. Honestly, he acts like he knows places better than me when I’ve known them, like, all my life. He does it all the damn time.”
Eddie lets out a laugh that still sounds slightly wet; he sniffs as if to cover up the sound. His smile is shaky at best, but it seems genuine.
“Man, he does that to me, too. What is up with that? Last week, he swore he found some shortcut to the Hellfire room that I’d be totally unaware of, like I’ve not spent forever in the damn building.”
He falls into step with Steve as they walk on, and Steve catches the very slight grimace he makes as he swallows.
Steve checks his jeans pocket. It turns out luck is on his side, at least for this: he’s got a couple of mints, still unwrapped.
When he offers some to Eddie, he gets a heartfelt thanks in reply. But at the same time, Eddie also looks suspiciously close to fighting a smirk.
“What?”
“Nothing!” But the smirk’s definitely won; Eddie tucks the mint into the corner of his mouth as he says, “Just didn’t realise I was getting the full Skull Rock experience.”
It takes a second for Steve to catch on. “The experience—?”
Eddie’s smirk grows. “Your reputation precedes you.”
Steve snorts. “Fuck off, are you twelve?”
“Maybe,” Eddie says, halfway to singsong.
Steve shakes his head, half in amusement, half in thought. Sharing juvenile kisses with girls at Skull Rock feels a world away, almost like it happened to someone else. That’s not even why the mints were in his pocket in the first place—not that he’s gonna put a dampener on Eddie’s teasing or anything. In truth, the habit began the night after Starcourt, using a mint—despite his stinging mouth—to help keep himself awake.
Of course he doesn’t say all of that. Chooses instead to nudge Eddie in the side, fighting a smirk of his own.
Eddie acts like he’s been dramatically winded in response, makes a crack about how that move wouldn’t fall under the Skull Rock experience.
Steve thinks he’s getting a handle on how to read him, charting the improvement of his mood through just how stupid he sounds—when smiling no longer seems like it’ll fracture his face from the strain.
By the time they catch up with the others, they’re both stifling laughter (Steve keeps having to remind himself that this is technically a stealth mission), Eddie reaching across to mess with Steve’s hair in retaliation for being repeatedly nudged in the ribs. His hands feel warmer now, Steve realises with a smile, as he pushes Eddie back with a forearm against his chest.
For the most part, it looks like their disappearances haven’t been noticed—Nancy quietly moving to rejoin Robin at the front as if by chance. Steve knows better, knows everything has been carefully coordinated to look that way; as Eddie relaxes at his side, he feels a rush of gratitude for the group’s tact.
Granted, Dustin kind of breaks the illusion when he turns around and starts walking backwards—but what he lacks in subtlety he makes up for in entertainment: using needlessly big, questioning gestures, brow furrowed in concentration.
When Dustin widens his eyes impatiently, Steve relents and nudges Eddie again. “He’s not gonna stop til you respond, trust me.”
“Hmm? Oh.”
Eddie lifts up Dustin’s water bottle with a grin and gives a thumbs up with his free hand.
Dustin brightens, replying with a thumbs up of his own—still stubbornly walking backwards like it’s simply his preferred way to travel.
“Gonna bet on how long it takes for him to fall flat on his face?” Steve says in an undertone.
Eddie snorts in a way that can’t be disguised as anything else, though he gives it a shot with the world’s least convincing cough. He gives up in the next breath, chuckling through a, “Steve,” in joking disapproval, like Steve’s such a terrible influence, which just sets them both off again.
Dustin’s probably too far away to hear them properly, but he’s clearly got the gist, eyes narrowing in suspicion. He does a series of emphatic gestures that Steve can’t make sense of; it just looks like he’s doing a complicated mime for charades.
Eddie must get the same impression because he soon calls out with a shit-eating grin, “Book or movie?”
Dustin flips them both off, but he can’t quite pull off the deadpan expression, his lips twitching, and Steve knows for sure that he’s hiding a laugh when he turns back around to walk with Max and Lucas.
Eddie smiles as if he’s noticed the same thing. He jostles their shoulders one last time, and it feels like there’s something more intentional behind it. A touch that lingers.
It’s easy when there’s still a long walk ahead of them—when there’s still daylight—to be convinced that they’ve got all the time in the world. Steve’s become kind of an expert at it: in his head, he could make swimming lessons last forever.
But even that old trick doesn’t last; he feels the clock restart as soon as that damn vine wraps around his ankle, cold and unyielding.
In the split second before being dragged under the lake, all he can think is thank God the kids aren’t here.
The thought follows him all the way into The Upside Down—later joined by the fervent wish that he could somehow summon up Dustin’s water bottle, as his head spins through the hopefully staunched bat bites.
“Christ, Harrington,” Eddie says when the dizziness persists, and Steve barely catches himself before falling against a vineless tree. “D’you ever take your own advice?”
“What?” Steve says faintly.
He screws up his eyes, forces himself to blink until his vision doesn’t waver—braces his weight against the tree with a sigh, ready to push himself up—
But Eddie’s hand is suddenly on top of his, halting him.
“Just… wait,” Eddie says. “Just a minute.”
Steve doesn’t know if it is a minute; he tries to keep track in his head, but the seconds slip away from him, and all he can focus on is each breath he takes, until they lose that gasping edge, grow deeper. Slower.
The world sharpens around him, like he’s been underwater without realising and has finally broken through to the surface. He feels the muted scratch of damp wood beneath his palm. The pressure of Eddie’s hand—not enough to hurt, but enough for Steve to tell that he’s still freaked out.
“I’m okay,” he says, looking Eddie in the eye. Does his best to silently project the sentiment of I’m not gonna collapse on you, I promise. “We’re not far from Nancy’s place.”
He can see a flicker of light just ahead, off to the side—thankfully not spots in his vision, just the flashlight he gave to Robin and Nancy; he’d tried to make it sound like he was doing them a favour when he actually thought it’d be best to leave both his hands free, just in case he did end up collapsing. At least he’d have a chance to brace for a fall.
There’s an uncertain air to how the girls are walking, and Steve suspects they feel a little like him: at a loss without the kids sandwiched between them. Now the usual priorities are thrown to the wind; what do you do when you want to shield everyone, all at once?
Eddie’s surveying him like he’s far from convinced by his definition of ‘okay.’
Still, he laughs weakly and says, “Good to know your navigating skills still work in this fucking hellhole.”
Steve’s hand shifts beneath Eddie’s as he stands up properly; it’s only then that Eddie moves away.
“Not far, not far,” he’s muttering under his breath, like he’s trying to reassure himself. His voice cracks in quiet desperation, “God, how long have we even been down here?”
Steve glances down to his wrist. He’s met with a watch face that’s smashed, jagged cracks running through it so he can’t even read the time it must’ve stopped at.
“Hey,” Steve says wryly, tilting his wrist so Eddie can see, “we match.”
Eddie doesn’t laugh, doesn’t even crack a smile. His eyes just go all big and dismayed, like he’s looking at something far worse than a broken watch.
Steve suddenly wants to tell him that it’s fine, to cover up his wrist like it’s somehow more gruesome than the wounds on his stomach—maybe it is, because Eddie keeps staring like he’s bleeding out right in front of him.
“Shit, Steve,” Eddie whispers with this horrible, helpless little laugh—almost like he’s on the verge of tears. He sounds like he did after throwing up, trying to say that something was funny when it was anything but. “You’ve had that forever.”
And Steve feels a rush of something still too big and complex to name, flickers of emotion too rapid to keep track of: the initial pang of sadness he’d pushed aside because the watch had been his grandfather’s, after all; wondering faintly what classes Eddie had shared with him, that would allow him enough time to notice something so small, you’ve had that forever—
So what? Steve thinks. So what, what does it fucking matter?
He’d rip the watch off if it’d help, Eddie’s too, stamp and grind them down until they’re indistinguishable from the ash in this place, and who gives a shit if it’s overwrought, it doesn’t have to mean anything—they still have time; they’re owed it.
He doesn’t do any of that, because the ground shakes again, and he’s ready—anticipates the stumble Eddie makes and reaches out to correct it.
They land safely away from any vines.
Eddie’s hand is clamped around his wrist, right at the part where the watch strap used to rub against his skin—back in sophomore year, when he’d always put it on too tight in fear of losing it; “Sorry, sorry,” Eddie’s mouthing, out of breath from the fall, but Steve’s holding on just as tightly, can feel Eddie’s pulse thundering beneath his fingertips.
And it’s so fast and frantic that Steve thinks he can hear it, too, a sound that he can’t get away from, in spite of it all: like a clock ticking. Counting down.
WRIST WATCH The explosive time shackle That never goes off Eternal zero Synchronize your deaths —Philip Murray
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seoktized · 2 months
Note
i saw requests open i would love to see how you think riize would be as boyfriends? your writing is really good so i thought this would be a good idea! thank you 🩷
of course thank you so much for the request!!!! here is:
☆ RIIZE as boyfriends!
ot7 riize x fem reader
warnings: cursing, fluff!!! riize being the best boyfriends 🥹🥹
req/asks are open <3
note: i didn’t know if you wanted texts or actual writing so i did both!!
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shotaro
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theeeee sweetest bf ever!! the cutest too. i feel like he’d always send you his dance videos bc dancing is his passion and he wants to show you how he’s improved! shotaro would probably drop everything if he had to in order to help you out or talk to you. so sweet i want a shotaro 💔
eunseok
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no hear me out i feel like he spoils you BUT NOT ON PURPOSE he’s jsut out one day and then he sees smth that reminds him of you and suddenly your room is full of stuff he’s bought you! you beggg him to not buy anymore because there’s literally no room but next time he’s out he buys more 😭😭 always calls you pretty girl, baby, doll… etc. just an overall sweet boyfriend (can you tell i’m eunseok biased LMAOAOAO)
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he’s like annoying but in a like boyfriend annoys you way yk? like ugh you’re so annoying i love you 😭 yes he may be like a Giant but he still wants to be babied by you! will do anything and everything to see you smile. best cuddler me thinks .. to add onto the loved to be babied like if u two are watching a scary movie or smth he is like hiding in ur chest or smth 😭 he’s so cute
wonbin
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he’s just 😭 dramatic but in a cute way. thinks the world will end if he doesn’t see you like everyday, which is impossible with his job so he’s always a lil sulky. but as soon as he sees you!!! this man if he could climb in your skin he would. lovesss to cuddle and lay there w you. he also lovesss to play the electric guitar for you. (you didn’t hear it from me but he also lets you play in his hair and style it all cute)
seunghan
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PERFECT BOYFRIEND 😭😭😭 so endearing and sweet. knows what to say like allll the time. he always has you blushing like.. girl. me next. will drag you along to play games with him (if any of you know of valorant, you’d be like his pocket sage) another pet name enthusiast!!! like he’ll never miss a chance to call you pretty girl, baby, love, angel, ETCCCC. will have u Dizzy bc of how sweet he is :((
sohee
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sobbing because he’s like the cutest bf ever!! cuddles enthusiast!!! he’ll pout until you come cuddle w him😭 he also always buys you food and is making sure you’re feeling good!! will give you princess treatment if you’re not </3 he also always pushes you to be your best!! he loves so see you thriving, seeing you happy makes him 10x happier :) sweet boy
anton
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yk how eunseok was like “anton always sends shorts in the gc” well yea you are a victim to the 393 shorts he sends daily. always sending cute things n bein like omg baby it’s us look 💔 anton i cry. sweetest bf ever he loovvesss to buy you things and would give you the world if he could :( his fav activity to do is to make songs for you or take you swimming !! he loves to show off his skills so you can tell him how cool he looked.
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chastiefoul · 1 month
Text
wriothesley who’s always very composed but breaks when this happened.
“yes, she said so when i was drinking some tea with her and neuvilette!” you claimed excitedly, but wriothesley has his cup mid-air, hanging awkwardly as he stared at you. he blinked, and then blinked once more, as if processing the sentence you just said.
“you.. you went to drink tea with them?” he asked quietly, hoping for a certain answer. “yes?” you answered just as quiet, sensing the drastic change of the atmosphere. he put his cup on the table, as he fold his hands the gesture was almost like a slow-motion. “without inviting me...?” he whispered, the rough of his voice made it almost impossible.
now you understood the problem, as the guilt arises.
“wriothesley i have a sound explanation for this,” you sat across him, putting both of your palms on the table. the male crossed his arms. “do enlighten me, then.”
“tuesday, 7 a.m. you told me you were going to be busy all day. so of course being a considerate lover that i am, i didn’t tell you since i knew you probably couldn't make it.” you nodded to yourself, pleased by the lengthy excuse you gave him. but judging by the blank expression of your boyfriend it was clear that he didn’t feel the same way.
“tuesday, 12 p.m. on fortress of meropide coupon cafeteria table number 2. we were having lunch together and you mentioned nothing of the little tea party i'd speculated you're having. why is that? the only thing i’m hearing now is that you couldn’t be bothered to mention it to me or at least pretend to invite me out of formality.” he raised an eyebrow questioningly. what’s your excuse this time, hm?
“speculation? is that what you’re basing your entire argument on, wrio? i must admit i’m a little offended that you would deem me that untrustworthy that you would accuse-“
“was i wrong?”
“no, no you weren’t. i had the tea party right after having lunch with you. and you’re right i could’ve mention it to you, but i didn’t.”
wriothesley only shook his head, dissapointed that he had to find out this way. he stood up, continuing  the dramatic parade. and you just had to hold your laugh in, since you rarely get to see this side of his if it wasn’t about his dear tea. “how could you, (y/n)? you know how much i loved tea,” he said, sighing as if you just did the cruelest crime. “wrio, i’ll make it up to you,” you said, approaching him as you put a hand on his chest.
“yes, i’d like to hear more of that.” he nodded solemnly, although the sulk in his demeanor was still apparent. you planted a kiss on his lips and he clearly didn’t expect that judging by his surprised features. “you’re trying to get me to go easy on you, aren’t you? alright, i just need a hundred more of that for you to at least make up half of the crime  you did.” he leaned down, fully believing that you owed him at least two hundred kisses. you just laughed at the siliness, “that’s way too much! how about this then, what if i arrange us another tea party? and i’ll invite even more people.” you offered, grabbing a hold of his face. he pretended to think hard about it before breaking out into a smile. “now that’s something i could get on board with.”
he held you close, resting his head on your shoulder. “thank you baby.” you only chuckled at this rare indulgent side of him, another side you wished you could see more of. “and can i please get invited to every tea party you’re having in the future?”
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denwritesandcries · 4 months
Text
Hold to my Hand – Hazel Callahan
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Pairing: loser!hazel x fem!reader
Summary: You might be a little – completely – obsessed with your girlfriend's hands and apparently she enjoys that a lot.
Word count: 2,3k.
Content: cursing, fluff, kisses, slight jealousy, hazel being a loser AND a mess, soft gfs.
A/N: So… women, right? Women with rings and cold hands… right?
English is not my first language.
“Babe, stop that!”
“What?” You said, “I’m not doing anything.”
But you were.
You were sprawled out on your girlfriend Hazel's bed, a book from your English class abandoned in front of you while your girlfriend had a laptop open on her lap, the cute look of concentration from before replaced by red cheeks and nervousness at your actions.
It was no big deal, actually, your girlfriend was simply very easy to flustreat; you had one of her hands in yours, leaving feather-light kisses along her calloused, ring-covered fingers, sending goosebumps across her cold skin.
“You’re distracting me,” she whines, looking away to a random spot in the room, “I can’t type like this.”
You huff, climbing higher on the bed to be at her height, keeping your grip on her hand and glancing at the laptop screen.
“Boxing and wrestling techniques?” you read, letting your head fall to rest on her shoulder, “Will you really gonna start a fight club with Josie and PJ?”
Hazel immediately perks up, telling you all about the idea that she and the girls had at lunch – you're sure 80% of it must have come from PJ, but you don't have the courage to interrupt her – and how they're going to get along and have fun with this and Hazel will teach everyone self defense techniques. She looks so much like a happy puppy that it warms your heart.
Unfortunately, you can't give her full attention to the conversation, being too involved in the way she gestures to process anything else.
Okay, maybe you're a little – just a little – obsessed with your girlfriend's hands.
“...You sure you don't want to?”
“Huh?”
Hazel's voice snaps you out of your reverie and she's staring at you with bright, expectant blue eyes.
“Are you sure you don't want to join?” She repeats.
“Hm-hm,” you mumble.
“Please?” She asks softly, “For me?”
You look away from her, because there's no way to deny anything if you're looking at that needy dog face, and you keep yourself looking at the old judo and jiu-jitsu trophies that she keeps on the shelves in the big room.
She really wants you to be part of this, but you know PJ and Josie are probably only doing it because they want to fuck someone and Hazel because she wants to make more friends, but the most you'd get from this club would be a broken nose or tooth, so no, thanks.
“I can come to see you at meetings and give you moral support, love.”
It's not exactly what she wanted, but you know you won. Hazel completely softens the moment you call her love, every single time.
Hazel lets out a long dramatic sigh, giving up her laptop and turning to wrap her arms around you, burying her face in your neck.
“Fine, but you’ll definitely change your mind when the club finally starts!” She declares.
You scoff, sinking into her touch when you feel her hands spread on your hips beneath your shirt comfortably.
“Do you really want to get into this with those two, Haze?” Your question breaks the established silence, somewhat uncertain.
Your girlfriend unfortunately had a tendency to not notice or just not stand up for herself when someone was mean to her and PJ and Josie weren't exactly known for being gentle with people, so Hazel running something with them made you quite apprehensive. Of course, you wouldn't do anything to change her mind since it was something she really seemed to want to do, but a little caution wouldn't hurt.
“Oh, they know what they're doing, babe,” she squeezes you a little tighter, “They were in juvie!”
You laugh, “No, they weren't.”
“Still.”
You keep your word and start attending all the fight club meetings – under PJ's complaints that you're not really doing anything –, busying yourself with cheering Hazel on during her turns and talking to Mr.G about any nonsense stuff that he wants to speak in the stands. It's actually quite fun, but you don't change your mind about the fighting part.
You start bringing water bottles as a treat to the girls while you're there and take on the role of tending to all of Hazel's injuries when it's all over – which is a lot, since they don't really seem to know what they're doing in the moment –, you find yourself being very good at it and probably would have become the whole group personal nurse if it weren't for the possessive look in bright blue eyes and the sad pout on Hazel's face when she watched you wipe the blood from a cut on Brittany's cheek and put on one of the cute little band-aids that were supposed to be only for her one day.
Besides all that, the most important thing is that you have a free pass to admire your girlfriend as much as you want and she looks great kicking ass and throwing punches. Especially throwing punches.
In your defense, the obsession with your girlfriend's hands, your girlfriend’s touch, is actually justified. The thing is, you never had many friends since you came to this weird school and neither did Hazel, so when you got together everything in your relationship was a little new; you found yourself suddenly starving for contact.
Holding hands, playing with the rings on her fingers, pats on the shoulders, arms around the body, hugs, caresses. It was simply impossible not to be aware of every little touch that Hazel gives you, even less impossible not to melt with them.
So yes, maybe you liked it a little too much when Hazel came to you asking to bandage her bruised knuckles just because it gave you the chance to touch her as much as you wanted, like now, at home.
“Ouch!”
“Stop moving, Haze,” you complain as you apply the antiseptic to her, “This will only make it worse.”
“But it hurts,” Hazel whimpers, pulling her injured hand to her chest protectively.
She's sitting on the bathroom sink, which probably wasn't very safe, but it was the best way for you to treat her and also where the first aid kit you were using was kept.
Today's fight seems to have been a little more serious than usual because Hazel's dominant hand is hurt. Like really hurt, with purple bruises already forming over the torn skin, so your spare band-aids weren't enough to take care of it. Now, if she would just let you handle it properly.
“That's bad, you're lucky it didn't break,” you say, taking her hand more gently to examine it, “Damn, what did that blue-haired girl do to you to make this happen?”
Hazel stays quiet, suddenly embarrassed and looking at anything else as you wrap a clean bandage around the wound.
"Then?" You press.
Hazel mumbles something slurred and unintelligible and you frown, not knowing what could have made her so embarrassed. With how easily that happens tho, you didn't have a good guess.
“I heard her talking to some girls before the meeting today.” She pauses, “Talking about you.”
“Oh,” you say, trying to pull away a little so you can look her in the eyes, but Hazel closes her legs around your waist so you can’t move, “Saying bad things?”
She shakes her head and swallows, her blush deepening.
“She said that she likes it when you come to see us,” her good hand grabs the front of your shirt, “Said she wanted to ask you out.”
“Oh, Haze–” You begin.
“She knew we were dating. She knew. But she kept talking about it and I– I got mad, so I hit her.”
Hazel says it all quickly as if it were a single sentence, but you understand anyway; she is nervous, keeping her eyes closed and looking down. She was jealous, still is, but she's also scared of what you'll think of her for it.
Screw it, you think, it's a fight club, people are going to get hurt sometimes. Now it's time to comfort your girlfriend.
“You beat the shit out of a girl for me?” You say, taking the bandaged hand gently and bringing it to your lips, “That’s hot.”
Hazel's face is so red it glows, “Babe,” she squeals.
"What?" You tease, leaving smacking kisses from fist to wrist, “She should know better than to say things like that for you to hear, how rude.”
Hazel’s pupils are dilated when her eyes meet yours, “You’re serious?”
“Hmm,” you hum, leaving a mark of lip gloss on her skin, “Like I would leave the best girlfriend in the world for someone else like that.”
She squirms in your grip, swallowing hard and trying to keep from stuttering and you can't help the giggle that escapes as you notice a shiver run through her.
“You’re doing that on purpose,” she whines.
“I’m not,” you shrug, innocently, “I’m just kissing it better.”
You think Hazel never really realized the effect her touch has on you until one day at the library.
There's no club meeting today, so when you make your way to the library after your last class, your girlfriend follows along beside you excitedly, rambling about her day and waving your hands together as you walk down the halls.
You had to study for a history test, so you find a table in the back where you like to stay while Hazel looks for a book nearby to entertain herself.
You just spend less than an hour focusing on memorizing dates and names your teacher sent to the next test before your ears pick up the clink of Hazel's rings against the antique wood of the table.
Your gaze shifts away without even realizing it, focusing on Hazel's drumming and immersed expression.
“Have any of your rings ever fallen off?” You ask with sudden curiosity, even after months together this had never occurred to you.
“Huh?” She lifts her head, “Oh, yes. Lots of them.”
Hazel stops for a moment to check it and adjust some looseness and you gently take the hand with the ring you gave her, running your thumb over the silly little smiley face plastered on it.
“I never take that one off,” she smiles.
“I noticed,” you laugh, feeling your cheeks heat up, “You might end up breaking your finger over this, you know? Or someone’s nose.”
“I was trying to be romantic,” Hazel snorts.
“Sorry, love,” you lean across the table closer to her, looking between the plastic ring, “I just gave that to you as a silly joke.”
Hazel tilts her head, that confused and bit sad puppy expression back on her face.
“Yeah?”
You nod, “One day I’ll give you a real one, with a real gem,” You can feel Hazel staring at you, her jaw is probably dropped, but you settle for shaking her hand, “A blue one. Will suit you.”
“You think so?” She sighs.
“Of course,” you find yourself saying, “I’ll give you the most beautiful one, the first one everyone will notice when they look at you.”
You look up to find Hazel. Just Hazel. With soft eyes, bright smile and hands full of rings.
There were moments – moments like this – when it felt like there were only the two of you in the world, when you couldn't see or feel anything but Hazel and you drowned in her completely.
Taking a deep breath, she leans over the table, hand letting go of yours to slide down your arm. You swear your skin crawls.
“Babe?” Hazel calls; you notice how she keeps her voice low for fear of ruining the moment, even though she's so clearly nervous.
You open your mouth and nothing comes out, the touch on your skin is cold but it feels like it's burning you from the inside out. What did you come here to do in the first place?
Hazel leans back under the forgotten book and you grab her wrist when she moves to keep her close.
“I– I would like that,” she says, eyes wide and face flushed, “Sounds good, I mean.”
"You deserve it. You deserve this and more, love,” You’re not really sure what ‘more’ is, especially for someone who can buy anything they want like Hazel. Maybe it’s all she wanted, all you could offer her; maybe it’s just you.
Hazel squeezes your hand, leaning in closer and running her thumb over your knuckles so gently that the noise you make is embarrassing. You think she's going to kiss you and maybe she would have, if it weren't for the angry shush! coming from the librarian near the bookshelves next to you two.
She only mentions it days later, when you're back in her bed, curled up in a familiar way while Hazel scrolls through her phone.
Her fingers are running through your hair, almost lulling you to sleep and you feel like you could do the same as the cat at the foot of the bed and melt into a purring puddle under her touch.
“You have a thing for my hands,” she comments out of nowhere, interrupting the peaceful atmosphere, a giggle in her tone.
“What?” You ask confused, using your arms to lean against her chest, “I do not.”
You know it's not true, but denying it is better than admitting something like that. Hazel gives you a look; she knows you better than that.
“But you do,” Hazel turns you in her arms and you let out a surprised squeak at the action when she finds yourself on top of you.
You shake your head, refusing to give in, but she runs her cold hands under your shirt, resting on the warm skin of your belly – this seems to be one of her favorite things to do.
“Jeez!” You hiss, “How can you be so cold all the time? You’re like a lizard.”
“Oh, I love lizards!”
“Haze!”
You squirm in her grip, but Hazel holds firm, an unusual confidence behind her actions.
“Admit it,” she asks with a smirk, “You have a thing for my hands.”
“I have a thing for you.”
The cocky little smile she has every time she touches you for the next week is totally worth it – and it's also totally kissable.
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writtenbymoonflower · 3 months
Note
hi!!!! could you do polymarauders reacting to reader getting a tattoo (or multiple!) dedicated them? love u!!! 🧁
Thank you for requesting, lovely! gn!reader x poly!marauders.
cw: tattoo, swearing, Sirius being himself
681 words
You knew the secret was out when you had flinched away from James. He hadn’t done anything wrong, he just didn’t know. When his hand found its usual spot on your ribs as you were laying down on the couch with him, you couldn’t hide the discomfort you were feeling as his hand pressed into the tender flesh. James, of course, had no clue. 
“What’s that for, baby?” He looked a mix of concerned and amused. “Did that tickle?” He turned mischievous as he tried to worm his fingers into your side again. Remus flit his eyes to you both, stifling chuckle. You hissed, squirming away from your boyfriend's hands, no matter how gentle they were. 
“Ouch, Jamie.” You said before you could stop yourself. This made Remus drop his book. 
“What hurts, lovie?” His eyebrows rumpled, leaning closer to you and James. 
“Nothing, I’m fine.” You said, looking panicked. It seemed like Sirius could smell the trouble, because he stood up from where he sat at Remus’ feet, crawling over to you like a cat. 
“You hissed when Jamie touched you here, dolly.” He wriggled his fingers over your side, looking surprised when your shirt moved oddly slickly over your skin. You tried to bat his hands away, but he didn’t move. 
“Siri! Get away.” You tried to seem unsuspicious, but you mostly gave up on the act. 
“What’ve you got under here?” Sirius waggled his dark eyebrows at you, pulling your shirt up until your whole torso was exposed. You almost felt bashful at the realization that your whole chest was pretty much exposed, but they weren’t looking at it. Instead, they all looked varying levels of surprised. Remus moved faster than you’d ever seen him, crouching at your side next to Sirius. But it was James who spoke first. 
“Sweetheart! When did you get that?” He kept looking between your face and your ribs. Underneath the plastic cover was a small tattoo over your ribs. Lined up was little drawing of a moon, star and sun. 
“Well it was gon’ be a surprise.” You playfully scolded. “But I got it a week ago. It’s… it’s for you three.” You turned shy on the spot. You thought you would’ve had more time to get over the sliver of anxiety you felt. You had all been together for a long time, you all loved each other very much, you were all each other’s emergency contact even! But this was a big step, permanently marking them on your body. 
Sirius gently thumbed the skin next to the tattoo, looking in awe at your rib and leaning down to kiss over the plastic cover, being featherlight to not irritate you further. He knew from experience it was probably still sore. “I fucking love it.” He whispered against your skin. 
“Lemme see better.” Remus (gently) shoved Sirius out of the way, making him squawk offendedly. Remus didn’t care though, he looked entranced. James squeezed you tighter to him. 
“I can’t believe you did this and didn’t tell us! We would’ve gone with you, baby.” He trapped you in a kiss before you could respond, rubbing his thumb over your jaw gently. Sirius snickered at your dazed look when he pulled away. 
“Like I said,” trying to push away your flustered state. “It was a surprise.”
“Hell of a surprise.” Remus had nuzzled into your waist. “I’m gonna need one too.”
“Ooh, I like that.” James said at the same time that Sirius whistled.
“Oh yes fucking please.” He dramatically fanned himself. “You too Prongs,” He licked his lips looking at your boyfriend. James didn’t know whether to feel objectified or very flattered. (As how Sirius usually left people feeling). 
“I should, now that I’m the only un-inked one in this relationship.” He playfully jostled you. “You’ve abandoned me, lovely.”
“Don’t worry, honey.” You kissed his cheek. “I’ll pull you to the darkside with me.”
“Oooh, you minx. Thankfully I’d let you three corrupt me any day.” None of you would complain about that.
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k8luvsu · 19 days
Text
“ are you jealous? “
ft. Nanami Kento (from JJK)
plot: f!reader is gifted a bouquet of flowers, from someone that’s not Nanami Kento (your boyfriend)
Nanami Kento x f!reader
comfort / fluff
warnings: f!reader being called “love”, “darling”, “baby”, there’s physical affection
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Nanami Kento would understand, you’re perfect, you’re divine, words really can’t express your beauty in and out. You deserve all the flowers in the world, of course someone else would admire her asides from him. So why can’t he get over that fact? Why is he so bothered by the fact that you were gifted flowers? Maybe because that’s his thing. Maybe because you’re his, you’re his lover. He can’t bear the thought of someone else sending you flowers..
He finally had the courage to confront you, to communicate.
“Love?” He murmured quietly as you sat next to him, your head on his shoulder. The brightness of the TV’s screen reflecting in your eyes as you looked up at him. “Hm?”, you responded.
He cleared his throat, trying to not make it awkward, but it probably already is, “Well, see.. uhm..”, he uttered shyly, you nodded as a gesture for him to continue. “I don’t like the fact.. that.. that someone is sending you flowers that’s not me.”, he finally confessed. You make a small smile, in your point of view, it was very obvious, how the past few days he kept sending you your favorite flowers in a bouquet with a short letter attached to it which was written by him, how he’s being more protective than usual, how he’s expressing love and affection in so many ways than before.
He’s trying to prove to you that he’s the only man who can gift you beautiful flowers, he wants to be the only man for you. To be the man. He can’t bear of the thought that one day, someone will replace him in taking care of you and loving you. No. It just has to be him, no one will ever understand how he’s in love with you, obsessed with you, head over heels for you. Which is why, he has to be the man to give you flowers and spoil you.
“Ken, are you jealous?” You giggle, those gorgeous eyes of yours staring into his, if only you could see the faint blush on his cheeks, “Well, what if I am? I’m the only man who can give you flowers, my darling.” He grumbled and looked away, too embarrassed with the fact he’s actually talking about his jealousy towards something like this. “I know, I know,”, you pause, “can you look at me, Kento?” you said in a sweet tone which he can never say no to, your index finger was under his jaw, its impossible not to resist you. With a sigh of defeat, he looks at you with his eyes that has love for you, and only you.
“The flowers you give me are the only ones I’ll accept, I can’t promise you that the anonymous person who sent me those flowers will stop what they’re doing, but I want you to know that I won’t accept it. M’kay? The bouquets of flowers you gift me are unique— sure, other bouquets will have a small card, but your bouquets are the only ones with actual letters attached to it, that’s how I know its from you.” You tell him with a soft voice, placing your hand on top of his and rubbing your thumb on the back of his palm to reassure him. He sighs once more and replies, “You always know what to say, baby.”, he smiles slightly, placing a few kisses on your forehead and hair.
BONUS:
“If something as a different guy sending me flowers makes you jealous, what if Gojo-san sends me flowers?” You tease him with a mischievous grin
“I just hope I won’t go to jail for what’ll happen next, of course, I’ll just have to come up with a plan secretly and somehow not get caught—“ He replied with a hum, yet you could see his eyebrows furrow as he drinks his cup of coffee
“Kento! You wouldn’t,” You gasped dramatically and mockingly, but there’s a smile hidden underneath.
“Well… Gojo knows better than to do anything to or with you, I don’t care if he’s the strongest, he can go to other girls,” He chuckled and smirked
“Fine, fine. Whatever. Can we watch Netflix now, pleasee?” You plead him, pouting as you cling onto him
“Of course, darling. Anything you want.” He kissed the back of your hand and gave you the remote with the handsomest smile.
THE END
reblogs and likes are much appreciated, thank you for reading !! <3
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sim0nril3y · 4 months
Note
How about one where they have a huge fight with lots of angst and groveling? I just love angst so much.
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Note: my looooooove, i hope that this was okayyy, i'm not super happy with it, but it's kinda angsty with a little bit of hope towards the end. Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Civilian!Reader Warnings: No mask Simon (It's my personal headcanon in his regular life he probably wouldn't wear it), established relationship, talk of sleep struggles, canon-typical swearing.
There had been so much of your relationship that had been so difficult in the beginning. It wasn’t like there was ever a conversation that you were officially together, it just happened. It was like you never wanted to leave and equally he didn’t want that either. You simply began sleeping over at Simon’s flat, keeping some spare clothes in your car. It was because the conversation never happened that you were left trying to figure out what Simon needed or wanted from you.
It was the little things in the beginning, taking his arm in public, wrapping yourself around it. Simon was simply shrug you away, as if unwanted. You were hurt by the exchange, but it was hard to talk to him about these things because… well, it wasn’t easy to talk to Simon most of the time.
You’d try and bring up these conversations with him. You’d try and ask him what he wanted. It all came to nothing. Emotionally he struggled to voice any type of opinion or need. When you would begin the conversation Simon would simply shut it down, when you’d accuse him of being unavailable emotionally, he’d call you dramatic.
This same little argument would come up every now and then, but finally you were sick of it all, you were sick of going in circles, you were tired of not being able to make any progress, you were just annoyed by Simon shutting you out. “Where are you going?” His voice boomed from behind you.
“I’m going home.” You told him firmly, turning to look at him. “You don’t want me anywhere near you in public. The only time you’ll touch me is in your home.” You fumed at him and Simon look bewildered for a moment. “And then when I try and talk to you about it because it bothers me, you just shut me out.” You announced. “So, yes. I’m leaving. I’m frustrated and I feel like I’m not being heard.”
Simon let out a gruff noise. “You’re being dramatic.” “That’s what you always say!” You pointed a sharp finger back in his direction. “I’m telling you how I feel and you’re not listening. How am I supposed to know what is too much with you, Simon? I feel like I don’t know anything about you!” The worries that had been buried deep down came tumbling out. “I had to convince you to go on a date with me. You wouldn’t tell me what you did for a job. You’ve never mentioned any family. I haven’t met your friends.” Then shaking your head, you continue. “And you haven’t asked me any of those things either…”
For a moment he looked frustrated, turning and rubbing his hands over his face. “You won’t talk to me… I don’t even… I don’t even know what we are.” You pointed out, voice lowering sadly. “I’m not expecting you to tell me everything… I just… I want to know if I’ll ever know anything.” Simon looked rigid, like he was frozen in fear. The way that he didn’t instantly jump to comfort you or assure you only increased you hurt feelings. Simply you nodded your head and said. “Okay… well, when you figure it out… you have my number.”
With a sharp turn you left the flat, tears beginning to fill your eyes and finally spilling down your face by the time that you reached your car. As you sat there you wondered if you should have just allowed things to continue, but that didn’t feel right for you. Of course, you didn’t want to make Simon uncomfortable either, feeling like he had to tell you things he didn’t want to talk about but if you were going to be more to him than a fling then you wanted to know more about him.
The next few days you didn’t hear from Simon and deep down you had convinced yourself you were never going to hear from him again. Maybe he just wasn’t ready for that type of commitment, or maybe you just wasn’t what he was looking for in a partner, too touchy, too dramatic. It hurt because you had felt like there was a real connection, something true and pure.
Late one evening you phone began to buzz beside you. Glancing down your eyes went wide as Simon’s name flashed across the screen. Shit… Shit, was this really happening? You had to shake yourself back to reality and answer in a breathless voice. “Simon?”
“Yeah…” His voice came back hard but with something lingering beneath the surface. “I…” He paused for a moment. “My mother’s name was Mary.” It was piece of information that you hadn’t been expecting and for a long moment the line went completely silent, you simply filled the space with. “That’s a nice name.” “It’s just a name…” A tiny smile tugged at your lips as you were reminded of the first conversation you’d had with Simon. “Come to the door?”
Stepping through your flat, prying open the door Simon stood there hoody drenched with rain, hood pulled up. “Haven’t fuckin’ slept in two fuckin’ days because I can’t get you off my fuckin’ mind.” His teeth were slightly grit, like he was mad with you or maybe himself for that fact. “I don’t know what we are but I know that I don’t want to lose you because of a stupid argument.”
Frowning you crossed your arms over your chest. “I struggle with opening myself up. I struggle with letting people in. I know… I know that is frustrating for you but that is just how I am.” Simon huffed. “I wasn’t expecting you to come bulldozing into my life. You turned my life upside down.”
“You could always ask me to walk away. If it was too much for you. If it wasn’t what you were wanting…” “Like fuck.” He grumbled, shaking his head. “Like fuck am I ever going to ask you to walk away. I’ve done countless stupid fuckin’ things, but that would… I’d never forgive myself if I didn’t put everything into this…” Then he took a step towards you, looking deep into your eyes with desperation and vulnerability. “I will try and do better. I will be more open. I can’t promise it will change overnight but I will try that for you… only for you…”
The second his hands clasped your face, bringing you forward to him a tiny whimper escaped your lips. “I can’t lose you.” Simon whispered. “Not now. Not ever.” Squeezing his eyes closed and pressing his forehead against your own. “Don’t give up on me yet.” There was a mixture of emotions that were bubbling around you now. “I don’t want to force you to be something you’re not uncomfortable being…”
“And I’ve lost too many people to let you walk away because I won’t hold your hand in public.” Simon replied shortly, opening his eyes and looking down into your own again. “We will figure this out, babe. You have my word.” Lips skimming against your own now, looking for silent permission. “Promise?” “Promise.” Your lips connected into a passionate kiss then. Maybe this could be the start of something different.
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Masterlist | Ask | 12-12-2023
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literaryavenger · 4 months
Text
I love you and I hate it - part 2
Summary: After your fight with Bucky, you put all your efforts into avoiding him, convinced that your friendship is over. Bucky, however, has other plans.
Pairing: Best Friend!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader
Warnings: Reader being dramatic. Angst. Language maybe. Minimal use of Y/N. Fluff. My poor attempts at being funny.
Word Count: 4.5K
A/N: I promise I didn't mean to make it this long, but I couldn't help myself, again, and I didn't want to end on another 'cliffhanger' so here it is! hope you like it!
Part 1
Masterlist
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Bucky can't believe what he just heard... You like him?
No, you used the word ‘love’. You love him.
Do you love him?
Certainly, he would’ve noticed if you did... Right? He is a trained assassin, he was taught how to see beyond people’s words and actions.
And he knows you, you can deny it all you want, but he knows you better than anyone. He knows you better than he knows himself.
And if he’s being honest, you know him better than anyone ever has, Steve included.
You feel safe, you feel calm. You feel like the peace he’s always wanted, the quiet he needs.
You feel like home. In a platonic way, of course.
Right?
His thoughts of you are interrupted by Sharon’s voice. He didn’t even realize he was back at the party.
"Where did you go?" she asks and, suddenly, her grip on his arm was just a little too tight for his liking. But it was probably nothing.
"I went to check if Y/N was okay."
"Oh." something in her voice felt wrong, but Bucky tried to ignore it, that is until what she said next.
"Why would you even care about her? All she does is embarrass you like before. She’s useful to no one, I heard the only reason she’s even on the team is because she slept her way to it." she laughed like it was the funniest thought in the world, and Bucky couldn’t ignore it anymore.
Not only was she saying hurtful, untrue things about his girl, but she has the audacity to laugh at her own cruelty?
"How dare you?" he does his best not to yell, but his tone still startles Sharon. "Y/N is the best agent in all of Shield, that’s why she got in the team! She’s not an embarrassment, she’s a valued member of our family and she’s my best friend! Of course I care about her, she’s the most important person in my life! Don’t ever talk about her that way again."
Sharon seems shocked at his words but, looking around, she realizes people are starting to stare so she tries her best to defuse the situation. "Alright, I’m sorry, I won’t say things like that again. Let’s just calm down and have a nice rest of the evening, ok?"
In his head Bucky knew her request was reasonable, he could forget about this and keep having fun with his girlfriend. But in his heart he just knew he couldn’t let it go.
The words were coming out of his mouth before he can stop them, not that he even wants to.
"You know what, Sharon? This isn’t working. We have to break up." He doesn’t even give her a chance to say anything before he’s turning around and making his way to his room.
Meanwhile, on the roof, Steve’s trying to talk you down the ledge. Metaphorically speaking, obviously. 
"He hates me, Steve." you can't stop the tears.
"Stop saying that, sweetheart, he doesn’t hate you."
"You saw what happened at the party, the way he looked at me. And he heard me say that I love him and walked away like it was nothing." You sniffle. "If he didn’t hate me before, this certainly pushed him off the edge."
Steve has nothing to say to that, he knows Bucky doesn't hate you, but he also knows that you’re too stubborn to hear any reason, especially not right now when you're in the eye of the tornado and can't see a way out.
Right now you need a friend and shoulder to cry on, usually Bucky would take on that role, but, given the circumstances, Steve decides to step up and be that friend.
He wraps his arms around your crying body and holds you as you let it all out. Neither of you say anything else, the only sounds in the dark of the night being your sobs, until eventually you calm down and after a few moments of silence Steve glances down to see you fell asleep. 
Not wanting to wake you he carefully picks you up and makes his way to the elevator.
When he gets to the floor you both reside in he finds Sam and Natasha chatting at the kitchen counter, probably about to go to bed after coming up from the party.
Sam gives him a confused look, while Nat seems to understand what is going on right away as she moves without saying a word, walking ahead of Steve towards your room.
She opens the door for him and walks in behind, moving the covers back as he lays you on your bed as carefully as he can, and then Nat delicately takes your heels off before covering you with the duvet.
As they’re leaving your room the door opposite yours opens, revealing a hopeful Bucky but when he sees it’s not you, his face becomes stoic once again. He’s about to ask where you are when Natasha beats him to the punch.
"Leave her alone, Barnes. You’ve hurt her enough already." Is all she says before she steps into her own bedroom.
Bucky looks to his best friend for help but, at his confused face, the blonde super soldier just shakes his head in disappointment and walks away without a word.
Bucky stands there for a few minutes, just staring at your door like he's gonna will you to open it and talk to him.
He sighs and goes back to his room where he spends the next few hours overthinking about you and this whole night, eventually falling into an uneasy sleep.
The next morning when you wake up you feel at peace for about 10 seconds before the events of last night hit you like a truck, and all you can feel is humiliation.
How can you face the team after they witnessed your fight with Bucky?
How can you face Steve after he saw you at your most vulnerable and, apparently, carried you to bed after you cried yourself to sleep?
How can you face Bucky after he heard you say you love him and he walked away from you?
You can’t, that’s the answer.
Should you just move out? Just quit the team, ask Hill to be reassigned? Maybe you could even get transferred to another country...
You’re not overreacting, right? This is a very embarrassing situation and you have every right to want to run away from all of it.
As you’re making up an escape plan in your mind you hear a knock on your door, followed by Steve’s voice. "Hey, are you awake? We just want to make sure you're okay…"
You try to be as silent as you can, slowing down your breathing praying he’ll think you’re sleeping.
You can hear him exchange some muffled words with what sounds like Natasha, and then you hear their footsteps as they walk away, so you let out a relieved sigh.
Okay, step one is definitely getting out of this room, it’s just the most obvious place where to look for you.
You get up and out of your awfully classy dress, take a shower being sure to clean away all the makeup from last night and put on the most comfortable sweats you own.
Just as you’re opening the door you can see Bucky opening his about to get out and, in a panic move, you run back inside your room and slam the door shut.
Very subtle, yes.
You rest your back against the door and can hear him sigh and then walk away.
You wait a few minutes, just to be sure, and then relax a little. Your plan was to go to the gym and work out a bit, but now all you can think about is getting the hell out of this compound.
You grab your purse, make sure to have your phone and keys in it and open the door, making sure no one’s around before getting out.
You’re practically running, taking the stairs for good measure, and in a flash you’re at the garage. You jump in your car and drive away as fast as you can without breaking the law, not even knowing where to go.
Once you’re in the city you stop at a cafe for breakfast near your favorite book store, the one you and Bucky have visited together a hundred times.
Okay, stop that. No more thinking about Bucky.
You spend the rest of the day just going from one store to the other, stopping to have lunch at the diner you always go to when you’re in the city, and trying not to kick yourself for not being able to stop thinking about Bucky.
Seriously, why can’t you stop thinking about him?
It doesn’t help the fact that every one of your favorite places has at least a hundred and twelve memories of Bucky.
God, have you ever gone anywhere on your own in the last two years?
The more memories come to mind the more you think that maybe transferring wouldn’t be such a bad idea. Go somewhere new, get a fresh start.
When it starts getting dark you decide to drive back to the compound, but when you park and turn the car off you can’t find it in yourself to get out.
You take out your phone, which you’ve been ignoring all day, and go through all the messages of your worried friends, hating yourself a little more when you catch yourself looking for his name in your notifications.
Just as you’re about to answer Tony’s texts first, you get a call from Steve. You stare at your phone, unsure if you can stomach answering him right now, but your decision is rendered moot when someone taps against your car window.
Your head snaps towards it and you let out a breath of relief when you see Steve standing there, holding his phone and using it to tap on your window again.
You close your eyes for a second but resign to your fate as you gather your things and get out of the car.
When you lock your car you turn to see that Steve moved to be leaning on the trunk of your car, so you join him and wait for him to say something, not knowing what to say yourself.
"So," he starts, with his arm folded in front of his chest and looking at his shoes "you’re avoiding all of us now?" You let out a sigh, feeling bad for hurting his feelings.
"I’m sorry, Steve. I just…" you can’t even look at him as you talk, so you just look ahead of you at all the cars "I’m just embarrassed. After everything that happened last night, I don’t know… God, you even carried me to bed like a child." you cover your face with your hands.
You finally look at him when you hear him chuckling. "That’s what friends do, Y/N. They lean on each other." he bumps your shoulder with his playfully.
"I know we’re not as close as you and Bucky, but I am your friend too. I’m not gonna judge you for last night, I just want to make sure you’re okay. That’s what we all want. You made us worry that you might run away on us." He says the last part as a joke, but you can’t help looking away from him.
That’s exactly what you wanted to do.
You bite your lip as he keeps looking at you and you feel like he can see the gears turning in your head, like your thoughts are so loud and your guilt so visible that he knows right away he was right on the money.
"Y/N…" it’s almost a warning, but you still can’t find the courage to look at him. "You were seriously thinking of running away?!" he seems almost shocked.
"Okay, it’s not like I’m a teenager running away in the middle of the night after a fight with her parents!" you finally look at him. "I was just considering… I don’t know, maybe asking for a transfer?"
"So you actually want to leave the team just because you had a fight with Bucky?" He scoffs.
"It’s not just the fight, Steve, he knows I love him and he doesn’t even care!" You yell before sighing and lovering your voice.
"Do you realize how much that hurts? And now I’m supposed to, what? Just go back to how things used to be? Pretend like nothing happened? Even if we’re not friends anymore, he lives across the hall from me! I’m bound to see him and it’s gonna hurt every fucking time!" You’re almost crying, again, but you hold back not wanting to go through that again and you look away.
"I know it hurts, trust me, sweetheart, but… what about us?" you look at him again as he goes on. "We’re your team too. We’re your friends, we’re your family... You can’t just leave us. I'm not saying it's gonna be easy, but we can help you make it better. We all care about you a lot." It’s honestly a miracle you’re not crying already. You feel him take your hand, but don’t look away from his face.
"Please let us help you." you squeeze his hand and nod, not trusting your voice not to break and the flood to hit as soon as you open your mouth.
He smiles at you and you can’t help but do the same. "Good. Then let’s go up and have dinner like we always do." He starts walking and taking you with him, his hand still in yours.
While you’re waiting for the elevator you can’t hold yourself back as you turn to him and give him a tight hug. "Thank you."
He hugs you back just as tight. "Anytime, rookie." you snort and let go of him, giving him a punch in the arm you’re sure he didn’t even feel as he laughs with you.
When you get to the big kitchen most of the team is already there and you sit down next to Natasha while Steve sits at her other side.
The seat next to you is quickly occupied by Sam as he bings the pizza to the table. He gives you a side hug and squeezes your arm in sympathy but aside from that nobody even mentioned what happened last night, which you're grateful for.
You eat like always, having conversations, laughing and teasing each other like normal, you didn’t feel like anyone was pitying you and you realized Steve was right: these people are your family, you could never leave them.
And, as you watch Loki and Peter trying to make you laugh by messing with Thor’s hair, putting tiny umbrellas in it while he's not looking, you just know they’re gonna help you through everything.
What makes you sad to notice is that one brooding super soldier is missing, though you don’t bring it up for fear of opening that particular door.
And that’s how you spend the next few weeks: avoiding anything and everything that has to do with Bucky, including the man himself.
You start training with Natasha and realize how easy Bucky went on you.
You do more missions with Sam and Steve and realize that missions aren't as fun for everybody as they were for you and Bucky.
You hang out during your down time with pretty much everyone and realize that you couldn’t have as much fun with everyone as you had with Bucky.
So yeah, as much as you could avoid Bucky and talking about him to anybody, he lived rent free in your head.
Fun, huh?
It also didn’t help the look that Steve gave you every time you basically ran out of a room as soon as you caught a glimpse of your former best friend. 
Everybody noticed the change in your friendship, but it felt like they all took a silent oath to not mention anything to either of you, and you were glad they were respecting your choice to stay away from Bucky.
He, on the other hand, was going crazy.
He hasn’t seen you in weeks, except for those few seconds before you realize he’s in the same room and run away.
He doesn’t hear your voice unless he’s eavesdropping on you with someone else, but even then he never hears his name come out of your mouth.
Nobody will tell him anything about you, the only thing he can get out of Steve is ‘she’s okay, just give her time’.
He’s been trying his best to give you the space you need, but he feels like he’ll lose his mind if he doesn’t hear you say his name soon.
It’s been a month of successfully and not so subtly avoiding Bucky.
There was one time where, as the team about to land for a mission, he got much too close to you for your liking and you thought he was about to say something so you grabbed a parachute and quite literally jumped out the jet, then walked the rest of the way to the Hydra base.
Everyone had to wait for you, some annoyed, but most found the situation too amusing to be bothered by it.
Anyway. 
You’re at the gym for an early morning workout, a habit you took to when you started avoiding Bucky.
You know he usually stays up at night. Occasionally because he still gets nightmares, usually because his overthinking mind tortures him until early hours. So he uses mornings to sleep in when he doesn’t have missions.
You’re on the treadmill when you hear the doors of the gym open behind you but think nothing of it, assuming it’s just Steve replacing his morning run with a workout because it’s too hot to run outside.
When you don’t hear him say anything, you’re about to turn your head to see who it is, but before you can do anything you feel two hands, one cold and one hot, on your waist.
You squeal when they pick you up and take you away from the treadmill, setting you down on the ground in front of it before turning off the machine.
"Bucky, what the fuck?! I could’ve gotten hurt!" you were so shocked you didn’t even fully realize you were actually talking to the person you’ve spent so much time and effort avoiding, or that you were walking backwards while Bucky was getting closer to you.
"Oh please, I’d never let you get hurt." he’s sounds almost amused, like this is a normal thing between you two, but the truth is he’s just happy that you’re actually talking to him.
When your back hits the wall you realize too late that it’s Bucky in front of you and suddenly you’re looking around you to find a way to escape. But all you find is that he’s successfully trapped you between the wall and his body, his hands on the wall at either side of your head.
You swallow hard and if he notices he doesn’t say anything, but your brain is too busy registering the warmth of his body so close to yours to even be ashamed right now.
"Is this the only way I’ll get to talk to you now?" you almost miss his question, your eyes snapping up to meet his and, where you expected to see a smug look at having caught you not only off guard but also ogling, you found a frown and a slight pout.
Something about the hurt on his face stopped you from lying or straight up kicking him so he’d move and you could run away.
No, Bucky was your best friend, you’ve always felt the need to be honest with him ever since that first day, and even now you owe it to him to tell him nothing but the truth.
"I just need time." You hoped he understood.
"How much more time do you need?" Apparently not.
"I don’t know, can’t you just be patient?" You can't believe you really have to ask him this.
"It’s been a month, doll, I think I’ve been plenty patient. Are you planning on avoiding me forever?"
"Not forever… just… I don’t know." If you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t know how long you would’ve kept on avoiding him.
You were so busy doing the actual avoiding that you didn’t take the time to think about when you’d be able to stop.
You let out a sigh, but didn’t look away from his eyes for a second. He needs to know you meant every word you're about to say. "I was hurting, Bucky. I still am. I get that you have a girlfriend-"
"I broke up with her." he interrupts you.
"You… What?" you weren’t expecting that. "When?"
"The night of our fight. I would’ve told you sooner but it was hard to catch you, you know, with you avoiding me and everything."
You almost lost your train of thought, but it didn’t matter that he was single, he was still the first one to walk away, why was it so wrong for you to do it now?
"It doesn’t matter… I know you don’t owe me anything, but you walked away from me. From my feelings." you can see Bucky’s confusion so, before he can say anything, you explain yourself.
"That night on the roof. I know you were there, you heard me say that I loved you and you walked away like it was nothing. Like I was nothing. I know you don’t like me like that, and I can live with that in time, but it hurt. It still hurts." you don’t know what you were expecting him to say, but it definitely wasn’t he says next.
"Do you remember the day we met?" you furrow your brows in confusion but he waits for you to nod before he keeps going. "We’ve never really talked about it, have we? It's ironic since we’ve talked about pretty much every topic we could possibly come up with. But that day, you introduced yourself and I just got up and walked away. Kind of what you’ve been doing this past few weeks."  he chuckles a bit and you have the impression he's getting closer to your face, but you're probably just imagining that.
"Yeah, I thought I did something wrong, but you were just a rude bitch." he laughs and you can’t help but smile.
"I’m sorry about that, I just… the second I saw you I felt weird. And when you talked to me it was too much, I couldn’t handle it. I didn’t know what I was feeling and my brain just screamed at me to get out, so I did. Then you came to my door and said all those nice things and that weird feeling started to feel more and more comfortable as you talked. It was nice. Then we became friends and I guess I just dismissed that feeling as friendship. It was a different type of friendship that I’d never had... But then again I’ve never been this close to a woman. Emotionally speaking, of course." His hand comes to cup your cheek and you can’t speak, so he takes the opportunity to say everything he needs to say.
"This month has been hell for me, doll. I’ve missed you more than I’ve ever missed anybody in my entire life. Not being able to spend time with you, joke around, talk to you, barely even see you. It's been driving me insane. Being away from you for so long made me realize what that feeling was. You’re not just my best friend, you’re my person. You’re my calm, and my reason. You’re my happiness, my home. You’re the love of my life."
"What?" you're basically whispering, so quietly you’re sure he wouldn’t have heard you if he didn’t have super hearing.
"I love you too, doll. I love you." he holds your face in his hands "I love you."
You feel like your brain shut down all of a sudden. You barely know how to breathe, let alone talk. All you can do is stare at him, the look he's giving you making you weak in the knees.
"You’re killing me here, doll. For the love of god, say something, angel." The nickname seems to snap you out of it, and there's only one thing in your mind left to ask.
"If you love me, why didn’t you tell me on the roof?" He let out a deep sigh, you can feel his breath on your lips, but you try your hardest to focus on his words and not his lips.
"For one I was still with Sharon. And I didn’t really know what I was feeling. Also, I wasn’t even sure you were serious. Honestly, I was just confused about the whole thing, and still mad about the fight. Nothing good would’ve come from me staying and talking to you that night. I probably would’ve ended up hurting you more." All that makes a lot of sense, sure, but it doesn't change the fact that it hurt.
The look in Bucky’s face at the moment though makes you want to forgive him right this second and let this whole thing go. Pretend like the last month didn’t happen. 
So that’s what you do.
"What if…" you start, looking back and forth between his eyes and his lips "what if we forget all of this happened?"
"No." he answered so fast and firmly that it made you furrow your eyebrows in confusion and disappointment. "I don’t want to forget anything about us, doll. Good or bad, it’s all worth it, as long as it ends with you in my arms."
You're melting and can't hold yourself back, you grab his face and bring his lips down to yours.
He freezes, probably not expecting it, but when you're about to pull away, he holds your face to keep you there, deepening the kiss.
After a few moments you hear someone clear their throat and almost throw Bucky off of you, looking behind him while he turns to see who it is and you see Steve and Sam standing there, amused looks on their faces.
"We were just talking." You blurted out and Sam cracked and almost doubled over with laughter.
"Really?" Steve said while raising an eyebrow, almost exasperated and knowing damn well what you were doing.
"Sure they were, Steve, she was obviously trying to get the word out of his mouth!" Sam said to the blonde, still laughing his ass off.
"Oh, of course she was. Tell us, sweetheart, what did you find in Bucky’s mouth?" Steve was now laughing too, and you were so embarrassed you hid your face in Bucky’s chest.
He wrapped his arms around you, barely glaring at the two laughing idiots. "Ok, just get out of here, punks." Fortunately for once in their lives they decided to actually listen and left, their laughs echoing through the halls.
"You okay there, doll?" Bucky was now chuckling at your embarrassment.
You raised your head and, meeting his eyes, you said "I can’t believe Captain Dumbass is making fun of us for kissing."
He started laughing and you gladly joined him, looking forward to making up for the time you missed with him, unknowingly promising each other to never let go of the other ever again.
taglist: @mostlymarvelgirl @spookyparadisesheep @scott-loki-barnes @pattiemac1 @emerald-writes @sapphirebarnes
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kreumiya · 2 months
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★・fever dream part 1
taking care of the leader of Penacony while he's sick
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Well, the leader of Penacony may seem like he doesn’t have any weaknesses, however… getting sick a day before a banquet the two of you were meant to attend was definitely one. 
“Excuse me,” you said, pushing your way through the crowds of servants that had gathered outside of Sunday’s door. Maids, doctors, tourists, everyone of the sort was piling in. After all, not everyday did you hear the news that someone from The Family would get sick, even if it was just with an ordinary fever, they were quite closed off. Why do so many people have to be here? you thought, making it to the backdoor and letting yourself in, knowing that the bodyguards were already all too used to this occurrence. 
“You’re here?” 
Sunday looked up at you, smiling with a cloth half falling down his face. You walked towards his bed, noticing how intricate all the architecture seemed to be in his room. Plush velvet decorated his room in the farthest layer of the hotel. Taking a seat next to his bed, you took the cloth off his head, grabbing the basin and wringing out the water.
“You don’t have to–” he interjected, reaching for your hand. His hand was abnormally warm, especially so for someone like him, who you were so used to having hands cold to the touch.
“Well, I do have to so you can get better for the banquet,” you frowned and took the wet towel, placing it gently on his forehead. “If you don’t get better, who’s going to the banquet and hosting everyone? Surely you won’t let me, your poor assistant who’s only meant to accompany you, do it all by myself?” you let out a sigh, resting your head on his chest, hoping that you being dramatic would somehow cure all of his illnesses. He let out a small laugh and ran a hand through your hair. 
“Of course not, I’m sure I’ll get better in no-time, don’t worry much,” Sunday smiled, his wings moving slightly. “And even if you were to host a banquet by yourself, I’m sure you’d be able to anyway. But I doubt you’d be able to deal with the Nameless, I myself aren’t sure about them either.” 
You two lingered in silence for a few minutes before something crossed your mind. 
“Oh right!” 
You ran to the other bed, which was what took you to the Golden Hour dreamscape. Of course it was exactly as you remembered it, drunks and tourists of the like littered the place. And oddly enough, the bright lights of the city reminded you of how you had met Sunday – although that’s a story for another time…
Taking in the sound of the bustling city for another moment, you ran towards Sunday’s favourite shop, a cake shop that he had visited many times. Letting yourself choose the freshest cake with the great excuse that “Sunday would be eating this.” Soon you returned to the room, shoving the cake in between his hands.
“How’s it taste?” you grinned. It was his favourite food after all. 
“Not bad….”
And soon you tucked him back into bed knowing that tomorrow would be a long day with a sick leader of Penacony and a large banquet that hosted everyone from all around the universe. You just couldn’t wait to be overworked, at least it was with Sunday. 
Fever Dream Part 2
i have so many pulls for this man, probably ooc idk we've barely known him in story
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forever-rogue · 1 year
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Ooh what about Joel giving reader a kiss on the cheek now and then and calling her sweetheart and darling because he knows it makes her blush
Basically Joel torturing reader by shamelessly flirting with her until she finally caves and kissed him and he’s like “took ya long enough”
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AN | Please!! This is so soft and fluffy 🥰 
Pairing | Joel Miller x Fem!Reader
Warnings | Language
Word Count | 2.2k
Masterlist | Joel, Main
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
“Hey trouble,” you felt his hands on your hips as he gently moved you out of the way before you saw him. You hadn’t even heard him coming up, but he was good like that - stealthy and lethal when he needed to be. 
“Joel,” your entire face turned so warm you were almost sure you could have fried an egg on it. He looked over at you as though he knew exactly what was going through mind whenever he came around. Honestly he probably did and that made it all the worse, “what’re you doing here?”
“Nothin’ much,” he took a seat at the bar next to him. You felt stupid for even asking - you were at the bar, what else would he be doing here? You wish the ground would open and swallow you whole, “thinkin’ about having a beer. What about you?”
“Same,” you’d been nursing the same beer you’d first ordered when you walked into the bar. You shrugged meekly, “long week.”
“I’d say every week is a long week,” he offered up and you couldn’t help the snort of amusement that escaped your lips. His own beer was passed over and he took it, clinking it against your own, “cheers.”
“Cheers,” you whispered softly, taking a small sip. You didn’t even really like the beer, but it was a social thing to do. Although with Joel currently sitting next to you and leaning into you, it was hard to focus on anything but him. The two of  you sat in silence for some time, nothing needing to be said by either of you. 
You’d always liked Joel, always found yourself gravitating to the older man, but just how much you liked him was still dizzying and overwhelming at times. But you’d never say anything - you were pretty sure you’d rather die. You didn’t really have much to offer, which is always what kept you from saying anything. Instead, you like just being his friend, which was just fine with you.
“I have to leave tomorrow,” he said suddenly, angling his body closer to yours. Your heart dropped at the idea of not being able to see him, but you tried not to let it show on your face. He chuckled softly and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, “don’t get all sad on me yet - I haven’t even finished what I was saying.”
“I wasn’t…sad,” you lied although there was no reason to, “sorry - go on.”
“I have to leave tomorrow for a few days to get some supplies,” he explained, “and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me?”
And then your face broke into a huge smile that you weren’t able to hide, beaming and lovely. Joel returned your smile as you tried to not let your imagination run away too wild, “you want me to come? You’re sure?”
“I am,” he nodded, “what do you think? It’s nothing much, just a lot of driving and maybe a night or two of camping.”
“I’d love to,” you agreed with hesitation; you’d probably have done anything and everything he asked of you. He perked up at your response and raised an eyebrow, almost as if he was making sure he’d heard you correctly, “when are we leaving?”
“In the morning, bright and early,” you groaned lightly and that just made him laugh a little harder, “is that going to be a problem, sweetheart?”
“I hate bright and early,” you groaned dramatically, “but I guess I’ll do it for you, Miller. Remember, I’m doing you the favor here.”
“Of course,” he nodded seriously, “and I’ll never be able to repay you. Forever in your debt.”
“Okay now you’re just being dramatic,” you rolled your eyes but there was nothing but affection behind your gesture, “well, I look forward to an adventure. Bright and early.”
“Bright and early.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
You might have been panicking. Okay, you were definitely panicking. But why? You wished your mind explained that bit. You’d known Joel for several years, and had managed to be around him without any issue but the idea of spending so much time alone together and potentially small spaces just made things that much worse. You just hoped that you wouldn’t somehow manage to spill your little deep rooted secret. 
“Good morning!” Joel pulled up to your place bright and early just as promised, waving as you met him at the door. You wondered for a moment what he put in his coffee, but decided not to question it too much. He came up and took your bag as you followed him and mumbled your own version of a good morning. You climbed into the truck and made yourself comfortable and he cranked up the heat for your benefit, “ready to go?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” he grinned at you but paused for a moment before shifting the vehicle into drive. He reached under the seat and pulled out a blank, draping it over your lap. Your heart swelled at the gesture and you almost couldn’t contain yourself, “thank you, Joel. That’s really sweet of you.”
“I can be nice sometimes,” he winked and oh. That made the butterflies flutter in your tummy, “off we go.”
You spied the second cup of coffee sitting in the cupholder and you knew immediately that it would be made just the way you liked it. He was thoughtful like that - in so many ways. 
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
The two of you spent most of the morning and early afternoon, passing the time with conversation about anything and everything that crossed your minds. It was all so easy with him, everything always felt so right and natural. You liked that he made you laugh and you liked making him laugh too. When he’d first arrived he almost never smiled, but he was doing it a lot more these days. And it was a lovely sight to behold. 
You rested for a few hours, to stretch your legs and get some fresh air. You could feel him studying you intently, but decided not to question him. Maybe you just had something on your face, or your hair was funky…or something. 
"There's a small town nearby," hed suggested, "we'll stop there for the night. Unless you'd rather rough it and make camp?"
"Can't trust just anyone these days," you shrugged, "but I'm willing to chance it instead of camping out in the wilderness."
"Good point," he agreed without much emotion. If you'd taken him up on his offer, you might have gotten to share a tent with him. Ugh. Maybe you'd made the wrong decision, "I'm sure we can find a room somewhere there."
A room. Singular. Alright, perhaps things would be okay after all.
"We'll figure it out," you agreed as you looked at the lights in the distance. He reached over and brushed his knuckles over your cheek. Your skin felt like it was on fire from even the simplest of his touches and it made you smile despite your best efforts.
The rest of the ride passed by in silence, a comfortable one at that, and before you knew it you were parking inside the small town and looking around in amazement. You knew more towns like Jackson existed but it was still amazing when you got to see them. It was like a little bit of normalcy back into your lives.
"Come on," Joel tugged on your arm as he started to lead towards the small diner, "let's get inside."
You followed his lead, trailing slightly behind him as he slid into one of the booths. You looked around and couldn't keep the smile off your face, "this place is cute."
"Hmm," he hummed in agreement, "you think about what you want to eat and I'm going to ask about where we can stay for the night."
"Okay," you watched as he slid out of the booth, enjoying the view but not before he gave your shoulder a gentle squeeze. 
You looked at the menu and you weren't sure how much time had passed before he sat back in the booth. Only when you looked up, it wasn't Joel sitting there.
Instead, it was a young man who was smiling brightly but managed to send an unpleasant shiver down your spine.
"Haven't seen you around before," he smirked and immediately there was a shift in the air and you did not like it at all, "I think I would have remembered such a pretty little thing."
"I…I'm not from here," you shrugged him off, "just passing through-"
"Well, I'm sure you'd like some company right?" He completely cut you off, "wouldn't want you to get lost or anything."
"I have someone," you searched the place, desperately willing Joel to just pop up, "if you don't mind."
“I’m sure no one will mind if you come with me for a little bit,” everything about this man had your blood boiling, “I can show you a good time, and you can show me a good time in return. Whaddaya say, sweet thing?”
Neither of you got the chance to say anything else before you heard the sound of a gun cocking and the cool metal was pressed to his temple. Your eyes widened in shock as you looked at a livid, furious Joel, “don’t say another word. Get out of this booth, apologize, and walk away.”
“Listen old man-”
“Now!” he shouted, causing you to jump slightly, “I won’t hesitate to blow your brains out, kid.”
“Fine,” he gingerly moved but Joel kept the gun pointed at him. You could see that the guy was genuinely nervous; you couldn’t blame him, Joel was scary when this side of him came out, “I’m sorry.”
You said nothing but gave him a subtle nod as he almost ran out. Joel kept his eye on him, before sitting down across from you again, “are you okay? Did he do anything or touch you?”
“No,” you swallowed thickly, a few tears rolling down your cheeks. Joel reached over and brushed them away, “he didn’t do anything. You got here just in time.”
“Good,” he let out a sigh of relief, “oh, my little trouble.”
“Thank you,” no one ever made you feel as safe as Joel did, “I don’t think that guy will try anything again. I think you made an impression on him.”
“Well, can’t go around and not make an impression,” he huffed bitterly, “you’re sure you’re okay?”
“Positive,” you promised, “thanks to you.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Joel had found a small little room in one of the hotels and your mouth almost dropped open when you realized it was only one bed. You set your bag down and looked before laughing nervously. It was an easy tell of yours that Joel had picked up a long time ago. 
“Umm, there’s…” you trailed off and pointed at the bed, “only one.”
“I can sleep on floor, sweetheart,” he promised without skipping a beat, “its not a big deal.”
“Joel, no, don’t,” you sat at the edge of the bed and patted the space next to you, “your back is going to kill you and I can’t deal with all of your belly aching. We can share.”
“You sure?” he asked softly as you looked up at him nodded, “I won’t try anything.”
“I know,” you smiled in relief, “if there’s a man I trust, it’s you. So.”
“So.”
"Can I ask you something?" You asked so quietly that he almost didn't hear it. He sat down next to you and nodded, "why do you look at me like that?"
"Like what?"
"Like…I dunno," you whispered, "like the way you do."
"The way I do," he repeated softly, "which is?"
"Joel, you're so - you know what I mean," you turned to him and found that he was looking at you and very close, "oh. Like that."
“Mhmm,” he reached over and cupped your jaw with his large, warm hand, “just like that. You know what I’m about to do, don’t you?”
“Maybe?” oh yeah. You were almost positive you knew what was coming but a small part of you was still doubting that this was all real and not some wild fever dream. 
And then he kissed you, just like you had imagined he would. It was soft and sweet, barely anything that would be considered mind blowing but it was just perfect. When he pulled back, you sighed softly and he pressed his forehead against yours. 
After a few moments you stole a few kisses, both of you smiling shyly at each other. 
“Do you understand now?” he closed his eyes and you laughed softly. 
“You like me?” you asked and he just grinned. 
“Mhmm,” he kissed you again, “took you long enough to catch up.”
“What if I hadn’t?”
“I would have waited,” he promised, “you’re worth waiting for.”
“Joel,” you looked at him with the embodiment of heart eyes, “do me a favor?”
“Anything.”
“Kiss me more,” and he had no problem with that request at all, “please.”
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nataliesfirefly · 1 month
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You and I Walk a Fragile Line - Farleigh Start x F!Reader - Part 6
a/n: hey guys!! im so sorry this part has taken me so long! im currently on a trip so i havent had much time to write! but i hope this makes up for it, im super excited for yall to read this!!! also i think im going to plan for this series to have a few more chapters, probably max 9 or 10! i love it sm i really dont want it to end 😭 but anyways enjoyyy and comment what you think! and again i apologize if the smut is mid.. btw this is not proofread LMAO
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word count: 4.9k words
warnings: MDNI 18+, smut, fingering, oral (f!receiving), p in v, angst, language, smoking, afab reader
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You’re sitting in your bed, reading a magazine, when your flip phone rings. You lean forward to pick it up from the corner of the bed, wondering who could be calling you this late. You raise your eyebrows when you see that it’s Lola. You haven’t spoken to her since school got out. Nevertheless, you answer it and put the phone up to your ear.
“Lola! Hey,” You grin. “Oh my God, I’m so glad you picked up. I’m so bored around here,” She groans, and you smile even bigger at the sound of her voice on the other end. “Around where?” You ask curiously.
“My parents’. I have to babysit my younger sister all the time. It’s exhausting, really,” She moans. “I just want to like, go to a party or something. Honestly, I would even prefer to be going to classes right now instead of this.”
“Wow. That must mean it’s really bad then, huh?” You continue flipping through the magazine, your eyes scanning through the apparently trending fashion and makeup choices at the moment.
“Yes. Ugh. You’re at Saltburn, right?” She asks. “Yeah.” You reply.
“How’s that going?” Lola questions, and you hear another voice in the background that sounds like her, only higher-pitched. “No, I’m on the phone. Go away. Shoo,”
You try not to snicker at her shooing away her little sister. “It’s…” You trail off, trying to decide the right way to describe how the summer is going so far for you. “I don’t know. Different.”
“How so?” You pause and wonder if you should tell her what’s been going on. You decide it’s probably better not to and keep some things to yourself.
“I think it’s just cause we’re growing up. I mean, we graduate in less than two years.” You shrug and reach over to grab your glass of wine. “Oh God, don’t remind me. My parents are still asking me what my plans are,” She sighs loudly.
“I can’t believe it.” You shake your head and close the magazine, uninterested in the latest celebrity drama. An idea suddenly forms in your mind.
“Hey, the Cattons are throwing one of their big summer parties in a few days. I could invite you?” You suggest. You hear Lola gasp. “Really?! I’d love to go. I’ve heard so many stories about the Saltburn parties.” She makes it sound so dramatic, and you giggle.
“And you’d get a chance to see Felix,” You grin as you hear her jumping around. “Yeah, I would! You don’t need to convince me any further. I’ll be there,” She pauses. “Wait, but they’ll let me come, right?”
“Oh, of course. They like me a lot, so I’m sure they won’t mind.” You assure her. “Okay, perfect. Thank you so much, my love. I’ll let you get some sleep. See you soon!” She squeals excitedly and you roll your eyes with a smile as she hangs up.
You set down your phone and sigh, looking around your dim room.
You haven’t been able to get Farleigh out of your mind since your little… moment two nights ago. He’s not avoiding you, but he’s not being nice either. He’s gone back to teasing you and embarrassing you in front of the Cattons. You should’ve known that if you got too close, he’d pull away and return to his old ways.
But every little glance you two share has your stomach fluttering and your heart pounding. Every insult meant to hurt or offend you has the opposite effect. In some depraved way, you like when he degrades you. The past two nights, you’ve laid awake and stared up at the ceiling, trying to relive that night when he made you feel so good. Just the thought of him had your mind reeling. You would do anything just to feel that way again. You’re hooked.
You can’t just keep wallowing in these feelings. You want to talk to him, work things out, and go back to how they used to be a week ago. More importantly, you just want to be in his presence. It gives you some kind of thrill to be around him. It’s like a game of roulette to see which version of him you’ll get each time, and you love it. You crave his attention.
You climb off of your large bed and walk determinedly to your door, opening it quietly and sneaking down the hallway. It’s quite a long walk to Farleigh’s room, but you don’t care. You pass Felix’s room, then Venetia’s. Both of their lights are out, telling you that everyone in the house is probably asleep by now. You can only hope and pray that Farleigh isn’t.
You eventually find yourself standing in front of his room. Dim light peeks through from under his door, and you sigh with relief. He’s still awake. Your decision catches up to you and you realize how stupid it is that you’re about to knock on his door. You shake your head to clear your doubt, raising your hand and gently knocking.
You hear his bed shifting and footsteps following close after. You swallow nervously, your throat suddenly feeling dry. Your heart races with anticipation as he finally opens the door.
Fuck. He’s shirtless with only a pair of sweatpants on. Your eyes trail down subconsciously before you blink and look back up to his face. Is he wearing underwear?
“Hello,” He says, his grin foxlike. “I can’t sleep. Can we talk?” You ask, your voice shaky. You curse yourself for sounding nervous. He crosses his arms and raises his eyebrows. “Talk about what?” He questions.
You pause, unsure of what to say next. What were you going to talk about? He would deny any feelings towards you, so what was the point of even coming here?
“Just let me in, please.” You step forward and avoid his gaze. He steps to the side wordlessly, opening the door further to let you into his room.
You breathe in the familiar scent of that candle he’s always burning, and the scent of his cologne. It’s musky and spicy, with notes of vanilla. You tried to memorize it everytime you were close to him. You walk over to his bed and sit down on the edge, looking up at him as he closes the door behind him.
“Can I have a cigarette?” You ask, pointing to the pack sitting on his bedside table. He nods, and you carefully take one. He hands you the lighter.
He stares down at you as you light the cigarette, taking a drag from it. He chuckles to himself and you exhale, furrowing your eyebrows. “What’s funny?”
“You always said you hated the smell. Yet here you are, asking me for a cigarette,” He replies with a scoff. “Maybe you’re just a bad influence,” You shoot back, and his smile slightly fades.
You can see his eyes traveling down your body, lingering on your thighs and your bare legs. You had outgrown these sleep shorts, but you never cared because you figured no one would see you in them. Well, there goes that.
“Are we not going to talk about the other night?” You mutter. “What’s there to talk about?” He replies, and you roll your eyes. “Are you-” You pause and let out a frustrated breath. “Are you serious?” You exclaim angrily.
“You can’t blame it on being drunk this time, Farleigh.” You tell him, and he freezes, his gaze faltering downwards.
“Can we not talk about that? Let’s just…” He sighs with exasperation and sits next to you. You turn away from him, looking out the window. You decide not to press the issue, since it’s apparently too much for him to think about right now. Honestly, you aren’t even able to fully process what’s been going on between you two.
“Let’s just… talk,” He says finally, and you face him again, exhaling a small cloud of smoke. “Okay.” You shrug. It’s what you both do best: Talking. About anything and everything, despite the strange history of your relationship. You guessed that it was because you had known each other for so long, that it just came naturally. He’s just… real. He’s never pretending or putting on a façade, at least around you he’s not. Around the Cattons, he has to, because to them he’s just the wild child, the comedic relief, the American. You feel like you are the only one that gets to see the real Farleigh, and it feels like a privilege. But you know that’s not true, and you choose to believe it anyway.
“So… Our third year at Oxford,” Farleigh says. You let out a breath and raise your eyebrows. “Can’t believe it’s already been two years,” You both smile, thinking of all the good and bad memories you’ve made so far during your years at university.
“Can I be honest?” You ask, and he nods. “I’m scared.” You say simply. His eyebrows knit together. “Of what?” He replies. “Graduating. You know, I’ll probably go to graduate school or something, but I need to start making my own money. Get a job. Do adult things,” You sigh just at the thought of all the responsibilities. “I can’t be on a scholarship forever. Or have my parents pay forever,” You continue, shaking your head. “I’m putting them through enough as it is.”
Farleigh nods again with a look of understanding. “I might go back to the states. See my mom, maybe stay there for a while.” He says. You can’t help but feel a little sad at the thought of him being away for so long. You hate to admit it, but you would miss him.
“But we don’t have to worry about that right now. You’re too uptight. Let yourself have fun,” He nudges you softly. “I’m trying,” You mutter. “Well, you’re smoking. That’s one step closer,” He laughs a bit and you roll your eyes.
It goes quiet and you stare down into your lap. You can feel his eyes on you, and your heart begins to race with anticipation. That familiar tension returns in the air between you and Farleigh.
You look up slightly, his eyes meeting with yours. Your stomach churns as you look down to see his hand inching towards your thigh, eventually resting on top of it. “I know why you came here,” He says, his voice lowered.
You look back up to him. “What?” You whisper. “Don’t play dumb,” He shakes his head. “I’m not.” You reply, trying hard not to break the intense eye contact.
You gulp nervously and finally look away, your face giving you away and burning red. “Hmm,” He hums, his thumb brushing across your thigh. You try to distract yourself by pressing the cigarette out on the ashtray on his bedside table, watching the little flame burn out.
He gently reaches up and grabs your chin, tilting your head back towards him. He drags his thumb down your bottom lip as you stare into his eyes. He grins slightly before moving his hand to cup your cheek, leaning in closer until your noses brush together. You know you shouldn’t be doing this. You know Farleigh is emotionally unavailable and toxic, and he won’t ever discuss his feelings or yours. But you can’t help but melt into the kiss, his touch, his aura. It’s like he’s magnetic, pulling you in everytime you try to pull away.
Somehow, every single time he kisses you, it’s better than the first time. Your tongues intertwine as your lips move in a perfect rhythm while both of you fall back onto his bed clumsily. One of his hands tangles in your hair, and the one that was resting on your leg moves up to rest on your waist, his fingers caressing your bare skin due to your tank top riding up. He eventually shifts his position so that he’s on top of you, and you turn to lay on your back underneath him.
His kisses begin to move down to your jawline, then your neck. He sucks and licks your skin so cruelly, but you don’t want him to stop. You breathe in the scent of his hair, his curls tickling your face, and you can already feel yourself becoming weak again.
You feel his hands start to trail down your body, resting on your hips, as he moves down the bed and you peer down to see him looking up at you from between your legs. Feverish heat burns across your skin just at the sight of it.
“Wait, wait. I’ve never-“ You start, suddenly feeling nervous. “It’s okay,” Farleigh replies, his eyes soft and warm as he gazes up at you. “Just relax,” He murmurs, gently pulling down your shorts and panties at the same time, shuffling them off your legs.
Just relax, you think. Easier said than done. You’ve pictured this moment so many times in the past few days, and you can’t believe it’s becoming reality.
And of all the times you’ve fantasized about this, none of them could ever do Farleigh’s beauty justice. His dark eyes are shining with something of lust and hunger, his plush lips slightly parted and his shoulders broad and golden. His curly hair is only slightly wet from his shower earlier, yet still perfectly coiled.
He looks up at you, trying to convey something through his gaze. “So pretty,” He mutters, tracing a finger along your thigh. Your breath catches in your throat and you feel your stomach fluttering already.
He lifts your legs up and places them over his shoulders. Your heart pounds in anticipation and you can hear yourself breathing among the silence.
Farleigh leans down and presses a few kisses along your inner thigh, and you don’t know how much longer you can stand his teasing. You watch him gaze up at you through his lashes as he dips a finger into your wetness and you see the smirk that tugs at his lips. He raises his eyebrows at you and your face turns red. “Stop,” You cover your face with both hands, your stomach doing flips. You can’t handle how perfect he looks right now, even as he teases you for how soaked you are already.
“Hey, look at me,” He says, his deep voice vibrating against your skin. You let your hands fall back to your sides, smiling shyly. His expression turns more serious as he furrows his brows, slipping his finger inside of you. He moans before you even can, his head falling against your thigh.
That familiar stretch around his finger has your mind reeling as you throw your head back. He pulls it out and you whimper at the loss, until you feel his middle and ring finger on your clit. Your hands instinctively move to grasp the sheets as he strokes your bundle of nerves perfectly, letting your head fall back down to watch him. He continues to maintain eye contact and it makes you so weak.
Your brain almost turns to mush as you see him leaning down, his head buried between your legs. A moan louder than you intended leaves your mouth as you feel his tongue greedily licking a stripe up your pussy.
“Shit,” You huff, your chest heaving up and down. No one had ever given you head before, until now, so you didn’t really understand your girlfriends when they would tell you how amazing it felt. But now, you completely get it. His tongue moves in long, slow strokes and his pretty nose nudges perfectly against your clit.
He barely lifts his head so he can stare up at you to watch your reaction. You grind up against his face, your hand reaching down to grab a handful of his curls. He groans at the feeling before inserting a finger again, moving at the perfect pace along with his tongue. The combination is enough to make your legs shake. The lewd sounds of him lapping up your cum and both of your wanton moans echo throughout his room.
“Farleigh!” You almost scream his name before letting out a long, drawn out moan. He glances up at you once more, his pupils huge with lust. He moans against you as he absolutely devours you, adding a second finger in. His long fingers brush against that divine spot inside of you and you whimper helplessly, your other hand gripping his sheets as if it could help ground you somehow. That delicious heat builds in the base of your stomach, spreading like a fire.
“I’m gonna-“ You gasp for air, your chest heaving up and down. His eyes are half-lidded and he seems completely lost in the moment, just absolutely pussy drunk. “Let go,” He says, his voice deep and raspy.
And you do exactly that. The pleasure shoots through your veins like a drug, your grasp in his hair tightening and your hips rolling as you ride it out. You eventually come down from your high, letting your legs drop from his shoulders as you let out a shaky sigh, your heart still pounding against your ribs.
“Fuckk,” You breathe out, resting your head against the pillow. Farleigh crawls over you, leaning down to kiss you. The lower half of his face is covered in your slick, but you couldn’t care less. He kisses you passionately, desperately, groaning into your mouth. You can taste yourself on his lips and his tongue, and it just turns you on even more.
He pulls away, his lips hovering over yours. You look up at him and suddenly feel an indescribable desire wash over you as you stare into his deep brown eyes. It’s like you can’t get close enough to him, like you need more than everything he’s already given you. You want him inside of you. You want to feel every part of him. You want him to feel every part of you.
“Farleigh,” You whisper, reaching up to touch his face. “What is it?” He whispers back, lightly touching your own face.
“I want you,” You say. You don’t care how stupid you sound right now. This carnal desire has completely taken over you.
“In what way?” He replies, smirking smugly. “I think you know which way I mean,” You mutter. You don’t have time for his teasing, although you love it.
His expression softens and he seems to understand what you mean. “Please, I need you,” You can’t believe you’re begging for Farleigh of all people right now. You know you’ll be regretting it later. His eyes widen and he seems shocked by your confession.
“Far…” You whisper, tracing your finger along his lips. He opens his mouth to speak, hesitating slightly.
“Do you know what you do to me?” He asks, his voice soft. You look up at him and tilt your head. He takes your hand and guides it down below his waist while still looking down at you. You gasp softly when you feel that his dick is so hard underneath his sweatpants. It has to be painful. You slowly rub your hand against him and his eyebrows draw together as he stutters slightly, and it almost looks like he’s in pain.
“Baby-“ Farleigh whimpers. “Please,” You beg once again, and he nods, quickly taking his pants off and throwing them somewhere on the floor of his bedroom. You look down at his dick, and you have to keep your jaw from dropping.
It’s definitely the biggest you’ve seen, and although you haven’t seen many in your lifetime, you know he would be considered above average. It’s long, with a bit of girth to it, veiny and already leaking precum from the tip. You feel yourself starting to get nervous. You aren’t sure if you could even take all of it, but hell, you’re going to try. You hope he didn’t pick up on your reaction, because you know he would tease you over it.
He places his hands on either side of your head and leans down onto his elbows. He never takes his eyes off yours as he positions himself. You wrap your legs around his waist, letting your ankles rest on his back.
He slowly begins to slide in, and you grunt quietly at the pain. He goes a bit deeper before you panic and place a hand on his lower stomach, stopping him. “I can’t-“ You wince in pain.
“Yes, you can. You can take it,” He nods and brushes the side of your face with his fingers. He takes your hand off of his stomach gently and places your arm back onto the bed. You nod in an attempt to encourage yourself, gritting your teeth to withstand the pain. You reach up to his shoulders, resting your hands on his shoulder blades, trying to keep your nails from digging into his skin as you hold onto him.
“Fuck,” Farleigh grunts as your walls grip him tightly, sucking him in. Eventually he’s buried inside of you to the hilt, and you can feel every inch of him. You’re still trying to adjust to his size, and the pain is slowly subsiding as he groans and drops his head and closes his eyes. You press your hips up against his, trying to get him to start moving. “Far,” You mutter. You can tell he’s trying to hold back. He breathes heavily and opens his eyes again, gazing into yours.
“I’m ready,” You whisper. His eyebrows knit together as he rolls his hips slowly, causing your eyes to roll back and drawing a short moan out of you. He shudders, slightly pulling out of you before thrusting back in. You wonder how he’s so good at this as your nails dig crescent moons into his back with each slow thrust and roll of his hips. Your mouth falls open and you try to be quieter but it’s no use.
He buries his head into the crook of your neck, his curls tickling your face. He’s whimpering and moaning your name and other incoherent nonsense right into your ear. He sets a beautiful rhythm, his bed creaking underneath you as you sink into the plush of the mattress. You think you hear the headboard hitting the wall but you don’t care about the loud sounds you two are creating. You just don’t want this moment to end.
He looks back up to you and you can see he’s already fucked out. His eyes are even more glazed over than before and sex sweat forms on his brow. He whimpers helplessly and pants heavily. “You’re so good,” He breathes. “So, so good,” You could probably cum just from his words alone.
You let out a wanton moan as he hits that spot again, deep inside of you. “Oh, fuck!” You gasp and claw at his shoulders. He drops his head again, kissing your neck as he thrusts into you faster and deeper each time, hitting your spot over and over once he’s found it.
“Yeah, that’s it,” He groans against your neck and you feel tears brimming in your eyes. “Farleigh- It’s-“ You can’t seem to form words, your brain turned to sizzling hot liquid. “I know, I know,” He whimpers, his voice slightly higher pitched and breathless. You try to hold on longer, but you’re already coming undone as your orgasm hits you sooner than you expected. Your body stills and you clench even harder around him. He moans, that pained expression crossing his face once again. “Oh God,” He chokes out, his thrusts beginning to become less steady.
“Where should I-“ Farleigh pants. “Inside,” You tell him. You’re on birth control, but you don’t have the mental capacity to explain that to him or explain why. His hips stutter and he stiffens, finishing inside of you, the warm feeling spreading throughout your lower stomach. He collapses on top of you, his head on your chest, resting on the soft fabric of your shirt.
You’re already sleepy and physically exhausted from what just took place. You breathe in his scent one more time and let out a sigh, staring up at the ceiling and trying to process what you just did. Then he’s wrapping his arms around you gently before pulling out of you slowly. You grunt a bit, feeling a dull ache between your legs, but you can’t help but miss the feeling of him inside of you.
He adjusts the both of you so that you’re both laying on your side, allowing you to stretch out a bit and cuddle up to him, tucking your head in the crook of his neck. He holds you, and for a moment, it feels like a real relationship. Something you had never experienced. Something deep. Something real. And then you remember that it’s not. After this, he will go back to avoiding you and acting like he can’t stand you. You just wish that he would put his pride away and admit to you what he really feels. But what does he really feel? Are you stupid for thinking that there’s something here?
Farleigh strokes his fingers through your hair, brushing away some of the strands plastered onto your forehead by your sweat. He seems to notice your silence.
“You’re thinking too much,” He says, his voice beautifully hoarse. You sigh, relaxing your shoulders. “Am I?” You reply, your voice weaker than you thought it would be.
“Just sleep here tonight,” He mutters, resting his chin on top of your head. You so badly want to ask him to be serious and have an actual conversation with you about your… relationship.
“Okay… but we need to talk about this,” You respond quietly. He sighs and shifts a bit, careful not to move you too much. “We can in the morning,” He says, but you know that won’t happen. You’ll just have to settle for no answers to your questions for the time being.
You curl up closer to him and let your eyes close, breathing slowly and peacefully. “Goodnight,” You murmur. “Night,” He replies, sounding just as tired as you are. You drift off to sleep in Farleigh Start’s arms.
ONE YEAR EARLIER
You were usually on okay terms with Farleigh. But you remember exactly when the dislike turned into hatred.
It was right before end of term exams and Felix convinced you to go to the pub to blow off some steam and relax after all your revising. You reluctantly agreed, then regret your decision when you saw Farleigh and Sasha there.
It was pretty far into the evening and you were beginning to get sleepy. You had spaced out for a moment, staring out the window and watching the snow fall before you heard something that peaked your interest.
“I mean, Felix, you have got to settle down,” Farleigh chuckled and nudged Sasha, pointing his cigarette at Felix.
Felix grinned stupidly and shrugged. “Listen, mate. I’ve tried.” Some other friends of his joined in with the laughter.
You sat up and leaned forward, facing Farleigh. “You’re one to comment on relationships,” You said, raising an eyebrow. Everyone else sort of quieted down after hearing your words.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Farleigh rolled his eyes at you and Sasha just glared. “You and Sasha. You’re dysfunctional.” You responded, unafraid to challenge him.
“Excuse me?” Sasha looked at you like you just committed a hate crime. “Yeah. He cheats on you, you cheat on him, you get back together, blah blah blah.” You took a sip of your beer and shrugged. “It’s gone on for almost a year now. It’s exhausting,”
Farleigh chuckled. “Ohh, you want to come after my relationship?” He smirked as if he was cooking up a plan in his mind of how to humiliate you best.
“Well, I bet you would like everyone to know that you lost your virginity to Joshua Brown,” Farleigh said, loud enough for even people from other tables to hear. A small chorus of gasps echoed across the room.
“You’re desperate, easy, and sloppy. You take anyone who wants you. I guess that’s what happens when you get no attention before you go to college, hm?” He just kept going, and the whole room went silent
“I’ve seen you walk out of so many dorms at six in the morning, it’s insane. You can’t even keep a fucking man,” Farleigh’s tone was harsher and colder than you’d ever heard before. Felix was staring at you in shock and Sasha was giving you that judgemental look.
You looked around to see all the pairs of eyes on you. “Fucking hell, Farleigh,” Felix muttered, shaking his head at him.
You stood up and grabbed your bag hastily, storming out of the pub with tears in your eyes. Why was he such a bitch? Why did he hate you?
Your reputation was officially ruined. All that time, he never told anyone about your situation with Joshua. Until now. He was doing so well. The whole class thought you were an innocent and pure, high achieving student, and now what would they think? You wish you didn’t care so much about how others perceive you, but you do.
You hated Farleigh. You hated him for ruining your reputation and your image. It was impossible to get him back or do something worse, since basically everyone knew he was a slut. But he got praised for it.
Ever since that night at the pub, other students would look at you sideways and whisper things about you as if you couldn’t hear them.
Fuck you, Farleigh. You decided you were officially done with him and your weird friendship. Even if that meant having to avoid him at every cost.
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