#i’m sayin that both Neil and Aaron were in the right to have an argument about this | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nickireadstfc · 7 years

Text

The Raven King, Chapter 5 – Call Me, Beep Me

In which Neil is introduced to the wonders of modern technology, the battle against heteronormativity continues, Andreil have An Interaction™ and Nicky finally reclaims his status as best person alive.

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The Raven King.

We start this chapter off with Neil recapping how he’s super broke, which is already the most fucking relatable thing.

“Broke” here meaning “I am in possession of half a million dollars, however I’ll need it for my entire sad runaway life so I can’t spend it on anything fancy”, not “I’m a poor intern who’s getting paid below minimum wage”, obviously.

The reason we’re evaluating Neil’s financial status is because some unexpected expenses have come up in his life that he is ruthlessly and cruelly forced to :

He’s going shopping with Nicky.

Well, technically the rest of the monsters are there too, but let’s be real, Nicky is the driving force of Operation Let’s Get Neil Into Some Decent Nice Clothes, And Hopefully Also Laid.

The reason they’re venturing into the scary, hostile territory of an American mall is, of course, the fast approach of one particular banquet.

“I could just not go,” Neil said.

“Shut up. You’re going,” Kevin said, like he wasn’t dreading this himself. All fourteen southern Class I teams would be in attendance, and that included Edgar Allan’s Ravens.

Oh, yes. Fun times with That Fucker™ himself. Have I mentioned I’m really, really looking forward to this thing?

It was a short list of names and numbers in bubbly blue print. Nicky leaned over and made a dismissive noise. “Seriously, Aaron?”

“Dan asked me to get a list from Katelyn,” Aaron said.

“Who are these people?” Neil asked.

“They’re the single Vixens.”

“They’re all women,” Nicky said. “That doesn’t help us.”

Nicky saying ‘Fuck you’ to heteronormativity will always be my favourite thing <3

Although, as funny as it is, Neil has repeatedly told him he’s not gay. And while I totally understand the frustration of someone insisting they’re not queer while your gaydar shouts otherwise, can Nicky be a little less pushy about it, maybe?

Just a thought.

“Stop being a bad influence,” Kevin told Nicky. “I am going to make him Court. It’ll be easier if he remains heterosexual. You know more than any of us how prejudiced people can be.”

Guys, he is literally right there.

Neil thinks so too:

“We aren’t really having this conversation,” Neil said.

Nicky clapped his hands to either side of Neil’s head as if trying to shield Neil from their argument. It didn’t really work, as he missed Neil’s ears completely.

Bahahaha. I actually had to laugh out at that mental image.

“Come on, Kevin. Even you have to admit this is really weird.”

Andrew threw his hands up. “Newsflash, Nicky: Neil isn’t normal!”

“This is beyond abnormal.”

“I am standing right here,” Neil said, “and I can hear you.”

You tell ‘em, Neil.

Nicky, has someone explained the concept of demi/asexuality to you? Like, ever?

Deep sigh. Will I have to do it, or does someone enlighten this boy before the series is over?

(Don’t tell me. I want to continue giving sarcastic running commentary to his running commentary on Neil’s sexuality.)

On a more serious note: The subject of Allison is brought up once again.

“I won’t bring her,” Kevin said, because someone had to break the quiet. “You might have brought Riko’s wrath down on the striker line, but I’m the reason he’s in the south in the first place. Neither of us has the right to speak to Allison now.”

Is that……. Kevin being….. human…….. with a basic scrap of…….. compassion………?

AMAZING. WONDERFUL. WOW.

“I know Riko was behind this. I know what people like him are like. Be glad you’ll never understand the way they think.”

Any other time, Neil would be relieved to hear such words from Kevin. It meant Andrew hadn’t told Kevin the truth about Neil’s past and that Kevin had yet to recognize him.

Yeah, and I’m still unsure on whether I’m buying that whole ‘Kevin doesn’t recognize Neil’ act.

Like. It still doesn’t make sense to me that you could play hours and hours of little league, not to mention watch a guy get legit murdered with this kid, and be fooled with a bit of hair dye and some contacts? Unless puberty did Neil Josten really, really well, I’m calling bullshit.

On the other hand, that comment did sound genuine and y’know, it would support that even the mighty Kevin Day’s brain makes a mistake or two sometimes.

On the other other hand, the mighty Kevin Day is an excellent actor, trained by years in front of cameras, who could drop comments like these and sound like he’s being entirely 100% genuine.

On the other other other hand, why pretend to not know Neil? Maybe not in front of the rest of the team, alright, but if it’s just the two alone? Why ignore their important shared history?

My brain hurts. I need to stop going in circles over this. All in due time, Nicki.

This is for real one of the questions I’m most excited to have answered by the end of this series.

Neil looked at the massive bundle of clothes in Nicky’s arms. (…)

“I have good taste in clothes, right? If you want to try them on you can, but you don’t have to. I know they’ll fit.”

“Why would I want to try them on?”

“Oh, because these are yours.”

Can I have my own personal Nicky who takes me to the nearest Topshop and picks out bomb ass outfits for me??? Please and thank you.

Neil, however, is an ungrateful fashion grouch, not thanking Nicky with one word as he obviously does not understand what a service to everyone’s eyeballs Nicky has probably just done.

However, all that fashion banter pales against what happens next – which is where the chapter gets really good.

“What is that dinosaur?” Nicky asked, dismayed. “No one put money on a flip phone, Andrew. You just ruined a really good pot.”

Neil idly wondered if there was anything his teammates wouldn’t bet on.

Oh my GOD. You bet on what sort of phone Andrew had? I love this team so, so much.

Wait. Shouldn’t they know his phone? Why are they betting on that.

Wait. It’s not his, is it.

“You couldn’t even have found him a qwerty?”

“What for?” Andrew finished what he was doing, snapped the phone shut, and tossed it at Neil. (…) “Who is Neil going to text?” (…)

“What.” Neil couldn’t even make it a question.

They got him a PHONE, you guys. A PHONE. THAT THEY CAN CALL. AND TEXT. FOR KEEPING IN TOUCH. FOR INCLUDING NEIL IN GROUP SOCIALIZING.

I am loving the FUCK out of this.

Neil, however, is not.

He didn’t think a small thing like this could hurt so much, but the grief that punched through him left him in pieces. (…) Every time they moved they got new cell phones, prepaid burners they could ditch at the first hint of trouble. He’d wanted to keep hers. (…) He’d thrown them into the waves before leaving the beach.

Whoops.

Today’s Casually Mentioned, Yet Heartbreakingly Sad Neil Fact is: This.

He’d never gotten a new one for himself. He’d never seen a point; Neil had no one in the world he could call.

Excuse me while I quickly drown in my own tears.

And although Nicky tries to calmly and gently reason with him (“That’s our just-in-case. You’ll make us all feel better if we know we can find you”, brb crying), Neil refuses to accept the damn phone.

That is, until, of course, until #bestboy Andrew shows up with it at their Late Night Kandreil Training Sesh™.

Andrew took his phone out of his pocket and set it down beside Neil’s. His was black but otherwise seemed to be the same model.

Do I get emotional over the fact that they have matching phones? Maybe.

Is it totally ridiculous as Andrew probably just bought him what he knew worked? Probably.

Will that stop me? Absolutely fucking not.

He flicked both open and pressed a couple buttons. A few seconds later Andrew’s phone started to ring. Neil expected a generic ringtone, but a man started singing. It didn’t sound like something Andrew would assign to his phone until Neil listened to the lyrics. It was a song about runaways.

Andrew, you wonderful little shit. <3

Also, that song either Run Boy Run by Woodkid or Ghost Towns by Radical Face and no other headcanons shall be accepted.

(I’m totally kidding. PLEASE do send in any other ideas you have, my TFC playlist still needs filling.)

Andrew bugs him about the phone thing (needing to watch his boy’s back and what have you <3), Neil dishes out some BS about how he used to keep the phone his dead parents gave him in hopes they would miraculously call again, bla bla.

Andrew is not taking that bullshit and supplies us with some sassy times instead.

“Who am I supposed to call?” [Neil said.]

“Nicky, Coach, the suicide hotline, I don’t care.”

“I’m remembering why I don’t like you.”

“I’m surprised you even forgot in the first place.”

“Maybe I didn’t.”

What a comeback, bro. This is weak af coming from a guy who tore down Riko on national TV, just sayin.

“There has to be a better way.”

“You could occasionally grow a spine,” Andrew suggested. “I know it’s a difficult concept for someone whose kneejerk reaction is to run away at the first sign of trouble, but try it sometime. You might actually like it.”

“What I’d like is to put this phone through your teeth.”

“See, that’s more interesting.”

“I’m not here for you entertainment,” Neil said.

“But, as expected, you are talented enough to multitask.”

I’m loving this so, so damn much. Andrew is destroying your ass with these comebacks, Neil, and I’m on the back waving a styrofoam finger, hollering at everything he says.

I would like to also add that Andrew is entirely sober for these interactions. This is pure, undiluted Minyard sass.

And as always – never a one-on-one Andreil Interaction™ without some feels at the end:

“I don’t care if you use this phone tomorrow. I don’t care if you never use it again. But you are going to keep it on you because one day you might need it..” Andrew put a finger to the underside of Neil’s chin and forced Neil’s head up until they were looking at each other.

Hombre…………………….….. das v gay.

“One day you’re not going to run. You’re going to think about what I promised you and you’re going to make the call. Tell me you understand.”

Neil’s voice had left him, but he managed a nod.

:’)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I’m fine I’m fine leave me here to fucking p e r i s h.

Neil takes this brief honesty hour to try and get back on that weird call from the Oakland PD Andrew got at the start of the book, however that ends honesty hour because Andrew just brushes him off:

“Children’s Services is opening an investigation into one of my foster fathers. Pig Higgins knew I lived with them, so he called me for testimony. (…) Richard Spear is an uninteresting but relatively harmless human being. They won’t find anything to pin on him.”

Bull-fucking-shit. No way. That was much too shocked a reaction for a little thing like that.

Whatever. All in due time, all in due time.

Onto better and funnier subjects: This is the wonderful, wonderful point where our favourite hobo is finally introduced to the wonders of modern technology.

By the time Neil made it to the athletes’ dining hall for lunch he had twenty messages. Most of them were from Nicky, idle comments about nothing in particular.

Nicky <33333

Also twenty messages, that is hilarious if you consider that Neil jumps out of his skin like an anxious baby rabbit with an orange bandana every time his phone goes off.

Neil didn’t know what to make of it. The Foxes spent seven hours together at practices every day and roomed with each other at Fox Tower. How they had anything left to say to each other was beyond him.

It’s called having friends, dude, you should try it some time.

He wanted to turn the messaging off somehow or tell them this wasn’t why he had a phone. Phones were for emergencies, not running commentary on a teacher’s boring lecture.

Nicky continues to spam him with texts the next few days, which, honestly, big mood.

If I like you, especially if our friendship is just being newly established, I will fucking blow up your phone with wholesome memes and weird 3am thoughts. Watch me.

This tactic has made some good ass friendships though, so no regrets.

However, for Nicky it’s not just all fun and friendship-making:

Halfway through [Nicky’s] rant about a current class project Neil’s phone hummed. Neil answered without thinking. It was a smiley face from Nicky. Neil looked up at Nicky, not understanding.

“See?” Nicky sounded pleased. “That’s much better. That’s how a normal human being looks when they check their phone, Neil.”

Dude. Did you just………….. blow up his phone all week………… just to make sure he’s comfortable using it…………………. I CRY???????

“Question,” Nicky said. “If I hadn’t been bothering you would you have touched that phone at all this week?” (…)

“Question again: Do you honestly think you’d have used it if you had an emergency?”

NICKY WHEN DID YOU BECOME SUCH A GOOD PERSON AGAIN I’M SORRY I BRIEFLY UNSTANNED YOU LET ME FUCKING L O V E Y O U

“Anyway, you’re welcome. I just saved you at least two hundred dollars in intensive therapy.”

MY DUDE <33333333333

Nicky is a wonderful person, Neil knows what an emoji is, all is good in the world again.

Next chapter: Fun banquet times! Sass! Shade! Fashion! And from all I know, possibly murder yet again! Stay tuned!

---

If you like what I do here and you want to help me continue writing, please consider buying me a coffee! Thank you so much <3

#nicki reads tfc #tfc #aftg #trk #the foxhole court #all for the game #the raven king #nora sakavic #I can only answer asks from mobile rn for some reason but do keep them coming!! I'll get around to answering them tomorrow probably

108 notes · View notes