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#i’m starting to doubt my own existence at this point
ariel26c · 29 days
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🎀Things I’ve learned about Shifting 🎀
1. Background noise doesn’t matter. I come from a Hispanic family household and let me tell you hun it’s freaking loud as hell. It’s like a zoo lol but guess what? I still shifted. At some point you will start to feel your CR kinda “fade away”. I have been in this state where I am in between my CR and DR. I can hear background noise from my CR but I still feel like I’m in a different room or I hear sounds from my DR as well. Has anyone experienced this?? Let me know, I’m curious 🤨
2. Have patience. Allow yourself to relax and naturally connect to your DR. Don’t stress about having random thoughts or having an itch or things like that. Have patience with yourself like seriously you got this babe. Sometimes for me it’s feels like it’s takes 1 or 2 hours until I feel fully connected to my DR. (It’s different for everyone btw) you may take less time than I do. Those things don’t matter if you decide that those things don’t matter.
3. Methods really aren’t needed. If you think about it all methods consist of the same thing usually. It usually consists of affirmations, visualization, subliminal audios, meditation, counting, blah blah blah. If you want to use a method, then do that but don’t force yourself to do a method that doesn’t resonate with you. If you don’t like counting, then don’t count. If you don’t like visualizing, then don’t visualize. Change things up a bit and listen to music that reminds you of your DR or do something that you think is fun.
4. Just because some people like to lie about their shifting experiences doesn’t mean that shifting is fake. Just like in every community there is going to be people that are dishonest or don’t have the best intentions but that doesn’t mean that shifting is a big inside joke. Don’t allow these people to discourage you from shifting to your DR or make you doubt in its existence. Don’t depend on other people's content to feel motivated or believe in shifting. Just KNOW it’s real and motivate yourself to shift. (even though motivation isn’t needed to shift)
5. Shifting is Real. I think we all should know this by now, but I don’t think people really fully understand just how REAL shifting is. I mean you are going to be able to use all of your senses. You will be able to taste food, see your reflection in the mirror, talk to people that may be considered as fictional in this reality, etc. The process of shifting is safe but if you are shifting somewhere that has violence or gore make sure you script your own well-being. High pain tolerance, no trauma, etc.
6. Time isn't important. Just because it's been 4 years or 5 doesn't mean you can't do it. Time doesn't apply to shifting because time is just man-made thing. We created the concept of time not the Universe. Don't blame the Universe for your "Failure". (Spoiler alert: it's not failure) You just need to realize that no matter what, it will happen. It is completely inevitable. Some people have shifted after 5 years so don't give up! It will be worth it.
7. You can't fail at shifting. When you do your method, you will shift to your DR or shift to your CR. You shift all the time. We are constantly shifting consciously or unconsciously. Manifestation and shifting are very much closely related. (But that's another discussion for another time) Just like how we are manifesting on autopilot we are also shifting on autopilot. So, when you do a sleep method, and you wake up in this reality instead of your DR you still shifted. (Just not to your DR) (Get it?)
I hope you found this post helpful! :)
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mrwavellswaps · 4 months
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Step-Bro Switch Up! (Re-Upload)
Instead of a new story this week I’ve decided to re-upload an old favourite instead. As some of you may or may not know, the original version was completely wiped from the surface of the internet by Tumblr to the point where there wasn’t even a trace of its existence. I wasn’t even notified of this when it happened which feels like it’s own separate issue considering it was my biggest ever story but I digress. I thought that now might be the appropriate time to re-unleash this story upon the world and allow those who loved the original to enjoy it once again and for those who never got a chance to read the original to discover it for the first time. That said I’m hoping to come out with some new and fresh content very soon but in the meantime I hope you all enjoy this return of an old classic!
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I found myself waking up at 6:30am in the morning which was rather unusual for me but not so much for my body. I soon realised why though as a low rumble came from my stomach. With a sigh I slid out of bed, trying not to wake the other sleeping jock beside me in the process. I didn’t even bother putting on underwear, instead walking to the kitchen buck naked.
I waltzed up to the fridge, opening it up before pulling out a carton of juice. After taking a few huge gulps I lick my lips and let out a deep belch. Next thing I’m rummaging through to see what I can make for breakfast. Had to make sure I kept this big body fed after all. Can’t let all my step-brother’s hard work go to waste. Confused? Well let me start at the beginning…
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A few years back not long after I turned 20 my mom met a guy named Devin who she soon started dating. Pretty big guy with a bearish ex-jock physique. He was 45 at the time so a similar age to my mom and they seemed to get along great. I certainly didn’t mind having some extra dilf eye candy around the house every now and then. I soon learned however that Devin was also a single Dad with a 22 year old son which certainly peaked my interest.
When I first met him I almost couldn’t believe my eyes. He introduced himself as Sam but I was almost too hypnotised by his looks to notice. He was the perfect image of a star college jock with enormous well rounded muscles that bulged under his clothes while standing at an imposing 6’3, practically dwarfing my lean 5’8 frame. And of course he was devilishly handsome too because the hot body wasn’t already enough, even having a great full beard that I was jealous of. I even remember how I had to hide my pulsing boner after he pulled me in for a quick bro hug, his manly scent getting caught in my nostrils.
After that Sam became a frequent part of my jerk off fantasies. Could you blame me? Not only was he the epitome of masculinity but my god did he have an incredible ass. Whenever Sam had his back turned I couldn’t help but have my eyes glued to those massive globes, no doubt stretching whatever pants he was wearing. Honestly I felt truly blessed to be able to spend time around such a man.
Anyway fast forward about two years and my mom had already gotten married to Devin. It was an amazing ceremony but for half of it all I could think about was how me and Sam were now Step-Brothers. We were truly intertwined now. I didn’t think the idea of that would turn me on as much as it did. That fucking hunk, my brother.
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Shortly after the wedding however, the roommate Sam had been sharing an apartment with decided to move out and live with his new partner. At first Sam had been considering downsizing to a smaller apartment but when he brought this up I knew this was my chance. I pounced on the opportunity and told him I’d been thinking of moving out for awhile and that it’d be cool to spend some more time with my new brother if he was down for that. To my excitement he actually accepted and the next thing I know I’m moving my stuff out of my moms house and into Sam’s apartment. I was surprised at how clean it all was for the most part. Then again Sam wasn’t your typical dumb jock either, he always seemed very mature and put together.
The two of us got on pretty well living together. We tried to respect each other’s space and chatted a lot as good friends. Luckily I did well to hide my excitement whenever I saw him walking around shirtless, showing off his huge hairy chest, or god forbid only a pair of tight boxer briefs. The day I first saw that was the day I nearly creamed myself on the spot. Oh and while I respected his space when he was around, whenever I was home alone I couldn’t help but give into the devil on my shoulder before rummaging through his room. I tried not to take anything but every time without fail I’d sift through his dirty laundry, pulling out whatever sweaty clothes I could find and relishing in the smell.
For about 6 months that’s how my life was. Living under the same roof as my hot step-bro while trying not to let him see my dirty secret. That is until I found a certain little spell online. Pretty much I’d been searching up some fetishy body swapping stuff online and ended up stumbling across some weird body swapping ritual. Of course I didn’t believe it but the masses of comments on the page claiming it to have worked peaked my interest.
Next thing I know I’m up in the middle of the night waiting until I was certain that Sam was asleep before sneaking into his room. It didn’t take long for me to find the pair of yellow underwear he’d had on that day, giving it a quick sniff before stuffing it in my pocket and retreating back to my room. Once there I was able to start the ritual. I placed the underwear in the middle of a circle I’d drawn on the floor surrounded by candles before chanting some magical phrases that were supposed to enchant them. I can’t tell you how stupid I felt at that moment but I continued on anyway, finishing everything I needed to say before grabbing the underwear again. At that point all I had to do was wear it.
I yanked on Sam’s ‘enchanted’ yellow briefs with the hope that my wish would come true but as I’d expected, nothing happened. With a sigh I cleaned up the mess I’d made with this ritual stuff, feeling like an idiot as I did before heading to bed. I decided to keep Sam’s oversized briefs on though because just wearing them was making me hard even if I was still myself. I remember I’d begun to jack off in them, imagining how hot it’d be to see him wearing them after I’d stained them with my cum. That is until a wave of tiredness swelled across my body and before I knew it I was fast asleep.
It seems I must’ve underestimated that ritual because overnight something truly magical took place. When I awoke I already knew something was off when I noticed my feet hanging off the edge of my bed. I sat up in confusion only to feel much heavier than normal while looking down the bed to see a pair of much larger feet. Next thing I yank off my bed sheets only to find a massive, hairy, muscular body that certainly wasn’t my own.
Right away I was running my hands along the ridges of my abs before grasping the heft of my giant new pecs, loving all the fur as I was previously rather hairless. Jumping out of bed I was quick to discover that my lower body was just as hairy and impressive with huge quads, and impressive calves. And then it started to hit me. I didn’t realise it at first as I’d never seen it from this angle but these giant legs, these bulging arms, these bulbous pecs… they all seemed exactly like Sam’s! I was even still wearing his briefs which now clung tightly to my form as I didn’t fail to notice the familiar bulge in the front. Only… it was my bulge!
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At that moment I knew what must’ve happened but my rational mind pleaded that it was impossible. Still I burst out of my room and made a beeline for the bathroom and what I saw in the mirror made me want to cheer, shout and most of all cream my new underwear. I saw none other than the sexy bearded face of my step-brother staring back in disbelief.
As you can imagine I spent the next 20 or so minutes inspecting every inch of my new muscle bound body. I did all sorts of poses to show off my physique in every way, pulled different kinds of weird faces in the mirror, relished in rubbing my hands through the full beard I was never able to grow before. Having the body I’d been lusting over for these past years at my disposal felt like some kind of lucid wet dream. But it was real! From my brother’s handsome face, to his giant muscle ass, to even his fat cock! All mine!
Soon enough I’d yanked off the underwear and started pumping my dick in ecstasy, loving how my hand only just fit the whole way around. Waves of pleasure cascading across my new body as I used my free hand to grope at my hairy pecs, the deep groans I let out only making me hornier. Before I could shoot my new seed however, I heard a scream come from what I can only guess was Sam’s room. Up until now I hadn’t even thought about the real him but judging by that scream I had only one guess as to what’d happened.
Instead of slipping the boxer briefs back on I decided to grab a towel instead and wrap it around my waist. I didn’t want him to think something was up to see me already wearing his clothes after all. With that I turned to the mirror one last time, scanning my face and upper body again with wonder. I still couldn’t get over it.
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Upon entering Sam’s room I was somewhat surprised to see an exact copy of myself stood freaking out at his body. I should’ve been expecting it but it was still extremely weird nonetheless. Then, as he saw me stood in the doorway, he went silent. Naturally he was in shock for a good moment or two but as soon as it passed he began shouting a bunch obscenities at me. Demanding who the fuck I was and how I looked like him. He even tried to punch me which I’ll be honest wasn’t all that scary considering I was now twice his size.
Right then I knew I had a few ways I could go about this. I could admit that I caused this to happen, I could tell him that I had no clue how any of it happened, or even pretend to be completely oblivious and act as if I was really Sam. The horny devil on my shoulder told me to rub it in his face that I now had his irresistible jock body and that he was stuck with my unathletic one but I couldn’t. Sure we weren’t super close or anything but he was always friendly towards me and was never a dickhead so I decided to take it easy on him.
I pretended to be just as confused as he was, saying who I really was but not having any idea how this happened. I think I was pretty convincing. We ended up sitting in his room and discussing it for what felt like hours, going over everything that happened last night as Sam tried to comprehend the situation. Of course he only went on and on about finding a way to fix this and I had to pretend as if I cared, trying not to get distracted by my own body. In fact there were multiple points where I had to keep hiding the tent starting to grow under my towel because of how hot it was to look down and see a shelf of muscle sitting on my chest.
Eventually I was able to convince him that we weren’t going to figure this out any time soon so we had to start thinking about how we were going to live each overs lives. As you can imagine he wasn’t all that fond of this idea, protesting it at first but eventually came to see reason. I suggested we should start discussing all the important details we’d need to know but before that I wanted to get some actual clothes on. I had to try not to grin while telling him to get out of my room while I changed. Though I couldn’t help dropping the towel just before he left and showing off the meaty cock and impressive ass he used to have. I caught him glancing back with a look of envy, the very same look I used to give.
Of course getting dressed in Sam’s clothes was an erotic experience in itself. All of these large shirts, pants, briefs and socks that would’ve swamped my former body now fitting me perfectly. I must’ve spent at least 15 minutes or so just trying on different clothes while jerking my cock a little in between until I heard a knock at the door and my former voice asking what the hell was taking so long. With a sigh I tucked my new toy away and waltzed out in what I was currently wearing. A pair of well fitting black shorts and a large pair of black and white socks. I didn’t bother grabbing a shirt since I just couldn’t help but show off this bod. Could you blame me?
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When he asked what I’d been doing I simply said I was trying on clothes. He knew there was more to it than that but decided he didn’t really wanna know. Instead we opted to both take a seat in the living room and start discussing things. I told him everything he needed to know about my retail job, which wasn’t a whole lot to be honest, as well as my friend group and what my daily routine was like. Afterwards Sam begrudgingly did the same for me, telling me all about his part time job as a fitness instructor at the local gym and that if we were stuck like this then I’m gonna need to learn how all gym equipment works and fast. He also gave me some inside info on his own friend group as well as walking me through what his football practice is like with the team. Part of me was worried hearing all this as I was beginning to wonder if I could really pull off being Sam but at the same time I was excited beyond belief to get into these social situations and convince people of the new me.
Thankfully it was Sunday so neither of us had a whole lot going on that day which gave us plenty of time to think and adjust without stressing. I spent most of it half naked and I loved catching glimpses of Sam glancing at his former body as I showed it off, even getting a little cocky by flexing every now and then which he didn’t appreciate all that much. Honestly I was surprised at how hungry I was as well and just how much I was able to eat. I mean I guess it made sense since a body this big needs a lot of fuel. Sam helped me a little with my meals though, making sure there was a bunch of protein and healthy calories to make sure I was feeding his body correctly. Later that day he also got me to head out for some cardio which I wasn’t too thrilled about at first but I actually kinda enjoyed it once I got running. I especially enjoyed my new sweaty scent that produced during it, not being able to help sniffing my pits when I got back. Of course Sam told me to go get a shower but before I did I couldn’t help swiftly grabbing him and shoving his face into my musky pits, laughing as he squirmed for a moment before letting him go. I apologised after through my laughter though I couldn’t help but smirk subtly as despite his face looking disgusted, the slight bulge in his pants told another story.
The next day however was when the real challenge started. After breakfast Sam gave me a list of what exercises to do at the gym. I’ll be honest I didn’t know half of them and had to look them up on the way. That walk to the gym however was the first time I noticed the difference in my interactions. Before people wouldn’t pay much mind to me but now as I passed people on the street I’d get some smiling and glancing at me, some giving me an envious once over, others even saying hi to me in a bit of a flirty way. Mostly from girls which even though I was gay I still enjoyed the flattery. Once I was at the gym though, I was in the zone. It’s weird but it was like muscle memory took over. I performed each and every exercise perfectly while loving the pump I was getting. Once again I was having to hide my boner at many points since I couldn’t help but get off to how fucking strong I was now. It did and still does feel absolutely incredible!
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Later that day I headed to Sam’s usual football practice with a bunch of his jock friends. Initially I was worried I wouldn’t fit in but I somehow found myself easily slotting into the jockbro mindset and was soon laughing and joking with the boys. It was the same when we started playing, right away it was like my body just moved on its own, knowing exactly what to do and how to play. It was then that I realised I must’ve somehow absorbed a lot of Sam’s skill, know-how and personality when I took his form and I was gradually unlocking it all by putting myself in these situations. Although I don’t think I was playing as well as Sam usually does, not because of a lack of skill but because I was constantly distracted watching all those jock butt’s and bulges squeezed into those football uniforms. Surely at least one of them had to be gay right?
After getting home I found Sam sat on his laptop looking up all sorts of body swapping theory stuff. Of course most of it was fake but he was clearly desperate to get his body back. Sure there might be an off chance he could find the site I used but that a one way transfer according to the spell. Knowing this I told him to not get his hopes up and to just try and make use of the hands we’ve been dealt. As you can imagine he didn’t take that very well at the time.
From then onwards though, I’d say things were pretty easy. I easily convinced my new dad and former mom, now step-mom that I was their good ol hairy jock of a son. I was able to pull off being a fitness instructor with relative ease after going around the gym and using each piece of the equipment to trigger the memories of how to use it properly. I’d convinced all of Sam’s friends inside and outside of the football team that I was him. I’ll say that it took me awhile to fully get used to hearing my new name but whenever I did it was like music to my ears.
I’ve gotta say though, living with the former Sam was more fun than I thought it’d be. I figured it would’ve been weird initially after the switch and that we’d have to go our separate ways but even after just over a week of being Sam I was having so much fun messing with him. For example I almost never wore a shirt around the house, always showing of my huge hairy pecs and whenever I’d catching him staring I’d give a little pec bounce until he looked away in annoyance. I’d frequently pull him in for ‘brohugs’ where I’d either squish him against my chest or trap him under one of my pits until I saw him getting a semi. He’d alway deny having one though which is why I decided to set up a fun little experiment.
Turns out that Ian, one of the other jocks on the football team, was in-fact gay. Wasn’t hard to decipher after noticing his frequent glances at my ass in locker room, not that I can blame him, and how much he blushed when I gave his jock butt a slap after practice. Next thing you know we’re making out under the locker room showers while groping up each overs bodies. It was insane since before I would’ve considered Ian to be light years out of my league but now I had him on his knees with his lips wrapped around my shaft to which I then soon returned the favour. It was here that I got my experiment idea.
Yesterday after practice, I pulled Ian aside and asked him to come back to my place. He was quick to agree and before you know it we were stumbling into mine and Sam’s shared apartment. My former body jumped up off the couch and asked what Ian was doing here. ‘To have some fun’ I believe my response was being making out with Ian in front of him and dragging the other jock back towards Sam’s-well my bedroom. As Ian and I stumbled onto the bed, kissing along each overs bodies as we slowly undressed, I made sure to leave the door open just a crack.
One thing lead to another and before long Ian had his face buried into a pillow as I buried my cock in his ass and I made no attempt to be subtle about, groaning and grunting and my balls smacked against that supple butt. Throughout our amazing fuck session I made sure to keep glancing back at the door and finally I caught exactly what I was waiting for. I saw none other than Sam peeking through the crack in the door and lightly tugging at my former dick. That was all the confirmation I needed that my little bro was just as much of a homo as I was no matter how much he wanted to deny it.
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And that more or less brings us up to the present, waking up early in the morning with Ian fast asleep beside me and being called into the kitchen by my growling stomach. As I searched through the fridge to see what else I could find to satisfy my hunger, I heard a cough coming from behind. Whipping my head around I saw none other than Sam with a judgmental look on his face.
“Don’t gimme that look, you’ve seen all this before.” I say, shaking my hairy ass a little before flexing. Sam rolled his eyes. “No no no don’t act like you don’t love seeing me show off your body, I saw you peeking in on me and Ian last night.”
Sam’s face went bright red. “W-w-what? N-no I didn’t!”
Immediately I shushed him, not wanting to wake Ian before stepping closer. “Oh come on don’t lie, I know you jacked off to it. So what was your favourite bit? The part when you got to see me using your body to pound into another buff dude and fill his ass with your cum? Or the part where you watched Ian totally dominate me afterwards and go to town on your former hairy bubble ass?” By this point Sam was completely speechless knowing that he’d been caught.
With that I lifted up an arm, exposing one of my pits to him but this time I didn’t shove him in it. “Go on, you know you want to. You can try and hide it all you want but you love seeing me show off your body, you love watching me adopt all your little habits, you love watching me slip perfectly into you jocky lifestyle. Just embrace it lil’ bro” He stares at me then at my pit. I could see it in his eyes. Pure lust. And then just as I’d hoped, he gave in to it. I couldn’t help but grin ear to ear as he voluntarily presses his nose into my pit, huffing my musk like a drug. I was even more surprised when he pulled away and immediately dropped to his knees, drooling at the sight of his former cock.
“C…can I suck it?” He asked while grasping it gently in his hand.
“Only if you agree to only address me as Sam from now on, even when we’re alone.” I state looking down at his hungry eyes. He nods in compliance and with that I put a hand on the back of his head and press him down onto my dick, letting him slobber all over it. “But don’t get too used to this. I’m planning on making Ian my boyfriend in the future and I wanna be faithful ya know. So enjoy it while it lasts.”
With that everything has finally fallen into place. The old Sam has finally accepted our new roles, I’ve assumed my new identity perfectly and I might even have a hot new boyfriend soon. My life couldn’t be anymore perfect right now…
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sukunas-wife · 3 months
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Ryoumen “i want a second son” Sukuna except he gets a feral little princess who matches his energy and is not above taking big bites of dad and only yuuji-nii can control her sksks
Eegehehe- warning- I suck at writing for girls actually😭 I’ve never had a younger sister or niece 🥹 my female cousins are literally non existent also,
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The doctor became nervous after your newborn started crying. The maids made quick work of taking care of everything and handing you your child already bundled up. Sukuna was just as confused before he took his child from you, carefully unfolding the blanket.
The room was silent, everyone turning to Sukuna, for a brief second your aching muscles were numb that you didn’t feel after birth. You were nervous, what happened, why didn’t anyone say anything? Sukuna held the child with two large hands supporting it, using his other two hands to carefully pull back the blanket. He didn’t lift his head, but you watched his mouth gape slightly like he wanted to say something. He turned his head slightly, settling on just looking at you through the corner of his eyes. It was a low rasp “she’s a girl,” he cleared his throat wrapping her back up. Without a doubt it was his, his pink hair, she had even taken to his red eyes like Yuji had. His fixed stare didn’t show it but he was concerned for her, even if he had wanted a second son, “Lord Sukuna we co-No.” he turned to Uraume, “It’s my child regardless if it’s a boy or not. She stays here.” He leaned back, handing you your daughter.
After everyone had cleared the room you were breastfeeding your child. Sukuna sat with arms crossed, eyes closed and his head resting back against the wall. You were staring down at your little girl and you realised, “You didn’t want a daughter because it’s going to force you to settle down.” You were grinning like a fool when you turned to look at Sukuna, he grunted not opening an eye or looking at you. “I’d be a fool to let anything happen to my daughter.”
You hummed, “If she’s anything like you I’m sure she can handle her own like Yuji when she’s older.” Sukuna opened an eye looking at you, “Anya..” you turned to look at him. “Her name is Anya.” There was no room to argue with him on that. He stood up, “I’ll bring Yuji.”
He left the room before you mocked him “oouu I’m Sukuna I’m gonna protect my daughter I’m a big bad tough guy.” You scoffed to yourself, “He doesn’t realise he’ll never hurt another child again Anya.” Leaning down you kissed her little head, and she barely opened her eyes.
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“hehehe” Sukuna was sitting on his throne head resting on his fist, eyes closed. You left a while ago to do something he already forgot about. Yuji wanted to go with you but Anya held him back, Anyways was an anomaly. She had no cursed energy or presence. Yet she still had the power to read minds, it was something that baffled Sukuna.
He learned she had that power at the worst time, when you were all gathered eating breakfast. When he thought about getting a collar. Anya just jumped excited “are we getting a dog like the one’s old man sells in town?!” Everyone looked concerned at Anya and she pointed at your husband with a bright smile, “Papa was thinking about buying a collar!” You looked at Sukuna “When did you- Right now! He was thinking about looking for a collar and a really good one so it doesn’t slip up or come loose.” It was the heat on your cheeks when you realised what collar he meant, but you were more concerned when you thought he was actually saying these things out loud in front of Anya.
Sukuna was looking away trying to clear his throat, ‘What the hell is this brat on about? I didn't say that shit out loud… did I?’
“OOOO PAPA SAID A BAD WORD!” Anya covered her mouth with her hands and she turned to you, your mind was drawing a blank ‘…what..what’s going on…”
Yuji was spaced out shovelling food into his face before he looked over, “Anya sit down don’t stand on the chair.” She listened to his not so demanding verse and sat down, “okay Yuji-nii.” She plopped down in her chair before perking up, “Are we getting a dog?”
Sukuna cleared his throat again looked right at her, if his hunch was right, ‘No, we’re not bringing some mangy mutt into the house’
Anya deflated and rested her chin on the table pouting, “why not?” ‘Because I said so.’ “Then why’d you say?” ‘Because I’m the owner of this house I decide what goes and comes.’ Anya sighed, getting teary eyed, trying her best to plead silently the way Yuji had taught her. Yuji snickered and he turned to you, you were sitting down whispering and asking Yuji if he knew what was going on. He explained to you that he figured out Anya could read minds not too long ago when she kept beating him in stone, parchment, shears, (please I’m sorry😭), hide and seek, and their little treasure hunting games. What he didn’t tell you was he also used her to out scam the guy who shuffles a gold token and bets money you’ll never find it.
It explained to you why Sukuna was just giving her looks and she was vocally responding.. it left you to worry how many of your thoughts she had actually heard. 😭
On a side note- here are some cannon events in the process of Anya growing up 😭😭
As a baby she was menace 🥺 she liked biting/trying to chew her dads fingers when he’d poke her cheeks. Not a cute nibble either, she’d dive in predicting the “If you eat his finger you’ll get stronger”
When she took hold of his finger the first time he was in love. That was his daughter and she meant the world to him. Then she dug her nails hard into his skin making him wince and immediately clip her nails. But when you don’t clip her nails because you're scared you’ll hurt her he always ends up with a scratched chest and hands when she’d try to take hold of something. She’s the reason he started wearing shirts even if they were uncomfortable on his massive arms 😔
Was kinda glad she didn’t sleep in the bed with both of you. She loved sleeping on his chest and Sukuna did also. But only allowed it when he could put those baby gloves on her.
After hitting age one she loved messing with Yuji and Sukuna while they were sleeping. You continuously went after her picking her up with your hand sunder her arms. She’s let out her baby screams and wiggle her body you could hear your husband’s attitude, “unhand me mother! I crave chaos! Ahahahsgsghshss!”
The older she got the more both of you learned the way Yuji admired his dad but was a total mama’s boy? It was almost the same case. Except she admired her dad.. and was a daddy girl. Yes she loved you and thought the world of you, but daddy’s so cool because he has so many cool powers! 🥺
It didn’t matter if she was sleeping in your arms, she was laughing and having the best time with you. If she even felt or heard the slightest sound, meaning Ryomen was in the room, she would scream and cry for him to pick her and take her with him. The same case as Baby Yu, you were jealous Ryo got all the attention and baby love even if they were attached to your chest most of the time.
Speaking of jealous, Yuji was the most jealous little 10 year old boy 🥹 “MY DADDY!” He’d carry Anya back to you so he could sit in HIS dads lap. Sukuna found it amusing and more often than not bullied Yuji. Which actually led to your funny little schedule where when Anya was briefly awake Yuji would be glued to your side. When Anya was asleep Yuji would run and stick to his dads side.
Sukuna has a permanent dent in his side boob where 2yo old Anya crawled over to him on your bed and then latched on, i don’t mean milk- i mean she saw a mound of flesh and went ‘nom’ He grunted and it took everything in him to not swat her instantly. He sat up after pulling her away. She was dangling by her feet clapping her hands and laughing, Sukuna was pressing his hand to his chest helping himself and cursing because no way he really let this brat catch him off guard and mess him up 😭
Which is also when it hits him, she has no presence because she has no cursed energy. He was disappointed but relieved she’d never have a reason to be caught in trouble 🥹
Here’s a little montage of moments 🥹
An invisible child means invisible crimes. Sure, Ryomen could actively tell where she was. But it’s his child he could let his guard down and close his eyes to think about the things he had to do. Breathing became slower the more he started to relax almost to napping completely.
1…2…3…4… “YUJIII NIII I GOT THE THING”
Kamutoke… she took the Kamutoke
Sukuna was going to get up and chase after her but she tripped and face planted into the shiny floors Sukuna had to pick her up and wipe off her tears and snot while telling Uraume to put up his tool because there was no doubt in his mind Yuji or Anya would kill the other with it by mistake
Anya loves her parents, but when Sukuna is thinking Sinister thoughts she runs to Yuji.
Ex. The four of you went out into the city, Anya was riding on her dad’s shoulders the way Yuji used to. She was patting away on his head when she heard the thought, “I should kill that man, I’ll start by slowly gutting him a- wwaahhhhh” followed by squirming and Anya basically jumping over knocking down Yuji. When you asked her what was wrong she said “…nothing… papa is kinda scary.”
Yuji had to piggy back her the rest of the day when she didn’t feel like walking but she sang her cute little “Family ooting” song
This is both Yuji and Anya when daddy’s home ,
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(I’m sorry I’m so bad at writing for girls 😭 I don’t have a niece to spoil or interact with, I’ll have to steal my friend and her little sister next time and play with her 🥹 I’ll do better for next one i promise 😤)
Tag: @sad-darksoul @cyder-puff @satorisgirl @bontensbabygirl @lupita97lm @queen-luna-007 @sakuxxi @mercymccann @simpforyoubitch @certainduckanchor @domainofmarie @najiiix @bakugou-katsukis-wife @amitiel-truth @souyasplushie @mylovelessnightmare @dolliira @ilovemybabies378
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loveshotzz · 8 months
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All I Really Want Is You
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older!neighbor!widower! steve x fem!reader chap ten/ten - a slow burn series of blurbs -
Baby, I’m Yours
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summary: A sleepless night brings you back to where it all began.
wc: 8k
warnings: 18+ for the softest of smut.
author’s note: I know we still have the epilogue but I can’t believe we’re actually here at the end of their story. Thank you to all of you that spent your summer reading about Steve and his Tough Girl, this has been such a journey for me as a writer with a lot of challenges but I’m so thankful I did it. Truly writing about these two and talking about it with you guys was the highlight of my summer. From the bottom of my heart, thank you 🧡
🌇 <- chapter nine
The Masterlist / The Playlist / The Tune:
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Beginning of August
Steve had been gone for a week and a half and it felt more like a lifetime to you, but it wasn’t for the lack of communication. If Steve wasn’t calling you he was texting you, sending you pictures of his lunch no matter how lame you told him it was. By day three you were sending him a picture of your own with a loud sigh and a roll of your eyes. His enthusiastic response of ‘That looks good baby!!’  had made you squirm in your seat with hot cheeks huffing the word “pathetic” to yourself, but that didn’t stop you from doing it again the next day. 
It was FaceTime calls of Peach telling Steve to turn the camera around, always too busy looking at you and telling you how pretty you are to notice his was pointed towards a wall. Or the one time it was pointed at Eddie who sat in front of him making a suggestive ‘cumming’ face to tease him, the camera flipped immediately when he heard you giggle. Steve scolded his cackling friend with an ‘honestly, I hate you’ before taking you to another room, apologizing profusely with blush visible on his cheeks.
It was the small bits of time in between text messages and phone calls that made it drag. The quiet evenings without Bandit’s excited bark from the front yard, the low simmer that’s always in your gut from the possibility of running into him any time you come and go, is gone with the man and his dog. It’s just enough time for seeds of doubt to creep in. The newness, the anxiety of it all.
The bright red numbers on the clock above your stove read 2:13am - three days until Steve gets home and tonight you can’t sleep. Quietly thanking whatever gods there are for your day off tomorrow, well - today. 
Your apartment smells like Clorox, lavender, and lemon. The wood floors sparkling just like your kitchen countertops. Cleaning everything you could touch has kept you busy, but it doesn’t make you any more tired than when you’d started. Your intrusive thoughts and daydreams are going a mile a minute:you didn’t get your usual good night call from him. The rational side of you knows that one missed phone call doesn’t mean anything, but the irrational side decided you don’t  need to rest.
The full trash bag next to your front door taunts you, just like the promise you made Steve about taking it out late at night months ago. The fact that it’s the last thing left to do makes it that much harder to walk away from. Gnawing at the side of your cheek you decide not to, he’s not even home to catch you.
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The moon’s blue glow illuminates your path while the skyline of the city sparkles below it. The tall buildings shimmer in a way that takes attention from the stars in the cloudless night sky. You can feel how the humidity hangs less thick in the air the more August rolls in. The thin material of your tank top does nothing against the light breeze that makes the bottom of your sleep shorts tickle the tops of your thighs. There’s a chill that didn’t exist before and it makes goosebumps dot across your skin.
Your slides scrape along the gravel from your refusal to fully pick your feet up, and it fights with the sounds of the late Friday night in the distance. You hum a made up tune as the streetlight buzzes above, lifting the lid you jump when you hear someone clear their throat behind you. 
“I thought I told you not to take your trash out in the middle of the night, especially alone, tough girl.” Steve’s voice erupts everything that’s laid dormant inside of you for the past week. Butterflies start to flutter until they’re fighting against your rib cage to get out and your cheeks hurt from how hard you’re smiling before you’ve even turned around.
“Well,” You sigh, dropping your bag in the trash can, “the guy I was supposed to call if I needed anything ditched me for his out of state boyfriend.” Shrugging when you finally let yourself look at him, the view rivals the one that shines bright behind him.
His hair is messy in a way that isn’t purposeful this time, but he looks just as handsome as any other day. The stubble on his jaw is thicker, but not quite like the night he waited at your doorstep, and god, do you want to feel it against your skin. His big arms sit crossed over a broad chest that’s only covered in a gray tank top. The thick patch of hair always half way on display threatens to touch the base of his neck, the bottom of his silver chain disappearing inside of it. 
His freckles are darker now, easier to find from all the sun he got while he was gone and you’re jealous of the hands that got to rub sunscreen on them, even if they were his own. The black basketball shorts on his legs stop in the middle of his thighs, it makes you bite at your lip.The greens and golds in his eyes light a match under your skin with the way he stares at you  — like he couldn’t possibly look away even if he tried.
“My out of state boyfriend huh?” He grins, tightening his hold on his own bag before his Nike slide covered feet crunch against the gravel towards you. His eyes catch the dainty silver still hanging around your neck, the stone shining in the moonlight, and it makes his heart swell. Tossing his trash in after yours, he meets your gaze down the slope of his nose, arching a brow. “What does that make you then?”
He smells like bergamot and cedar, a lingering hint of the cigar he probably smoked in New York still clinging to his hair. The heat coming off his body makes your fingertips buzz, twitching with the need to reach out and just touch him. 
“I dunno, what does that make me, Steve?” It comes out shy, a little above a whisper, a question just for him.
He hums, a low sound that vibrates from deep in his chest while his fingers come up to toy with the stone that dangles just above the dip of your breasts. The tips of them tickling rough against your soft skin. 
“What do you want?” His confident demeanor falters when he asks just as quiet, all the miles and days without seeing each other are affecting him too. He doesn’t tell you that’s part of the reason he booked an early flight home on your day off. 
“I want you.” You don’t hesitate when you say it, no pauses for even a second to think of what you want to say. Your hand comes up to wrap around his wrist, the muscles under your palm dance from your simple touch. He wonders if you can feel his pulse.
“You already have me.” He almost wants to laugh until he still sees the same shared doubt  in your eyes. “Haven’t I made that obvious?”
He tugs at your necklace as a reminder, a smile breaking across your face because of it and all he wants to do is kiss you now. Especially when he drops the stone to grab your hand, and after taking just a few steps, you reach up to touch it again — a silent, constant reminder of his confession as you walk towards the wooden gates.
“Wait, why didn’t you tell me you were coming back early?” You pout a little, looking up at him when he stops you both at your backyard. 
“I landed a few hours ago,” He chuckles, his hands finding your hips to pull you to his chest, in love with the way you stand on your tiptoes to wrap your arms around his neck like it’s natural, like it’s second nature to want him close. “I was actually going to surprise you in the morning with breakfast after I picked up Bandit from Nance’s.” 
“Oh yeah?” You grin at the thought of Steve showing up at your front door, that messy head of hair shoved into a baseball cap.
He nudges his nose against yours, the spearmint of his toothpaste fanning cool across your cheeks while your fingers curl into the soft hair at the base of his neck. Tilting your chin so your lips just barely touch, you silently beg him to close the gap. 
“Yeah,” He breathes, hazel eyes clocking the way your lashes flutter against the top of your cheeks. He almost feels bad for teasing, especially when you give his hair a gentle, coaxing tug. “But someone wanted to risk their lives for the sake of taking out the trash. So, surprise, pretty girl, I’m home.” 
His words make your breath catch, and you want to tell him he feels like home more than your real one ever did. Your heart thumps wildly in your chest when his top lip whispers against your still slightly pouted bottom one. You tug at his roots a little harder this time, needier, and you swear a whine tightens at the back of your throat threatening to come out if he doesn’t give you what you want. Please, kiss me.
“Well, good thing you were here to save me.” You giggle against his mouth, and it makes his hands squeeze at your sides a little tighter, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. The tip of your nose pushes against the rough stubble on his cheek, “Besides, I missed you, I wouldn’t have wanted to wait ‘til the morning.”
“God, honey. You have no idea how much I missed you.” His face crumples a little at the thought, almost like he forgot for a second you were right in front of him, but when you somehow pull yourself closer, he doesn’t waste anymore time.
The wood is rough when your back hits the gate at the same time his lips finally crash into yours. A week of longing comes out with a sigh. The metal hinges and lock clank loudly together while he steals the breath from your lungs. He coaxes your mouth open with a swipe from his impatient tongue, groaning when you grant him access. You taste just as sweet as he remembers, and he promises himself he’ll never go a day without it again — not if he can help it.  
Your hands get greedy in his hair, bigger handfuls, harsher tugs while your body stays flush against his as he keeps you pinned to the door. It’s all tongue and teeth for a minute, both of you losing yourselves in it for longer than you should. It’s not until a car honks, signaling to any bikers around that it’s popping out of the alley, breaking you two apart. 
Chest heaving and lips swollen, all you want is more.
He laughs to himself pressing his forehead against yours with the kind of smile that makes your knees weak. The tip of his nose touches yours; he’s all wild hair and love sick eyes. You don’t want to be without him tonight. Or ever.
“Come sleepover?”
The question comes out before you can stop it, before you can really register what that invitation might mean for both of you. His eyes widen before they search your face for any kind of regret, his tongue wetting his lips when he doesn’t find it. You twist strands of his honey hair between your fingers, nervously waiting for his response. 
“We - we don’t have to do anything. I just wanna be with you.” You finally whisper, your nerves getting the best of you. He can’t believe you think he’d actually say no.
“Let me shower and get the airport off of me, and then I’d love nothing more than to spend the rest of the night with you baby.” He steals another kiss from your smiling lips, letting you take another one for yourself, groaning at the nip of your teeth on his bottom lip before he finally lets you go. 
Opening the gate for you, he grabs your wrist pulling you back for one more, relishing in the giggle it earns him before he whispers that he’ll be back in fifteen minutes.
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It feels like your heart is trying to escape through your chest as you try not to check the time on your phone. Strategically placed candles are the only light in your living room and kitchen, while a dimmed bedside lamp in your room gleams a dark orange with your wax melter. It feels like your apartment is glowing, but it does nothing to relax the nerves that course through your veins as you pace the small space of your room trying to shake them before his inevitable arrival.
Knock, knock, knock
They are quieter than his normal ones, but they make you jump just the same. You shake your hands out, taking a deep breath before you pad barefoot to your front door. You tuck your bottom lip between your teeth to try and contain the smile that always grows the first time you lay your eyes on him and his lopsided grin.
“Hey baby.” He greets you in the kind of voice that makes the dough of your thighs press.
His damp hair is pushed back, from what looks like a few quick hands in the mirror. A simple white shirt replaces the tank top from before, fitting loosely across his shoulders, and a soft looking pair of gray cotton shorts cover the tops of his thighs this time. He’s wearing a tan pair of moccasin slippers on his feet that you’ve never seen, and for some reason his exposed ankles make the heat rise to your cheeks while the fresh scent of his pine body wash threatens to take over your senses.
“Hi handsome.” It’s dripping in sugar the way you say it, sweet off your tongue just for him as you open the door wider.
He thinks your apartment smells like peaches and the ocean when you close it behind him. It smells just like you and he feels surrounded by it, intoxicated with it, the way he always wants to be. You watch him take in your apartment like he missed it too, a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth when he notices you just cleaned it. He bites back his remark when his eyes meet yours, he can’t bring himself to say it when you’re staring at him from under your lashes with your back pressed to the door all shy like that.
“Don’t be shy, honey,” he extends a big hand out for you to take with soft eyes, “we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” copying your line from outside, he wiggles his fingers a little with a smile warmer than the glow of the candles that dance shadows across his sharp jaw and cheek bones, “I just wanna lay with you.”
You don’t hesitate to slip your palm into his, your heart racing when you watch his fingers wrap around you with ease. He pulls you into him, colliding in a mix of  forest and the beach. He keeps a hold of your hand, cupping your cheek with his other one. The pad of his thumb traces over the heated skin, paying extra attention to the soft bag under your eye. You needed sleep.
“Just me and you, that’s all I want, okay?” He reassures you in a voice lower than a whisper. His heart swells when you nod with big glassy eyes, your hand coming to rest on the top of his so you can lean deeper into his touch.Steve’s hazel eyes look to yours, he tilts his head a little bit closer in a silent ask for permission, you push up on your tiptoes to meet him halfway.
He kisses you differently than how he did in the alley, differently than the Fourth of July and the baseball game. He’s gentle, like he’s taking his time with you because he actually has it now, like he’s sure of it. He doesn’t try to deepen it even when they move together like this is what they were always meant to be doing, not even when your top lip catches a little dirty with his bottom. He wants to remember this moment, commit it to memory so that he never forgets what this feels like with you. He kisses you like this until the need for oxygen becomes too much and your feet start to hurt from standing in place for too long.
“Let’s go lay down.” You whisper between bated breaths that mingle with his, your chests heave as he gives you the kind of toothy grin that makes the butterflies wake up again, nodding with a squeeze of your hand.
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The hum of A/C and the sounds of your breathing are the only things that can be heard in the low light of your room. Steve’s body lays pressed on top of yours, making himself comfortable between your legs. His head rests on your sternum with a cheek against the soft curve of your tummy. His big hands hold tight to your sides, caging you in – it feels like he’s everywhere and you wouldn’t have it any other way. The weight of him relaxes you into the feathers of your pillows.
Your fingers keep themselves busy buried deep in the thickness of his hair. Still a little damp at the roots, you massage the part of his scalp you know was resting on the hard cushion of the airplane seat, earning you a deep groan that vibrates between your legs. He feels the way they try to close because of it, the sharp intake of breath that you try to hide.
He’d be lying if he said his own body wasn’t reacting being this close to you, especially when the pads of his thumbs caress under the swell of your breasts and there’s no wire of a bra to be found. His eyes roll back as the blunt ends of your nails start to scratch lightly near the nape of his neck, making his fingers squeeze you at the sensation. His face nuzzles deeper into the softness of your stomach, inhaling. You feel the prickle of his stubble through the thin material of your tank top and it makes you giggle. 
Steve doesn’t know how he lasted as long as he did this past week without you. 
He pushes the bottom of your tank top up and tries not to stare at the supple skin exposed to him before blowing a raspberry. It earns an even louder giggle, making your legs bend at the knees, trapping him in between your thighs.
“Steve!” You sound annoyed but the smile on your face gives you away when you go to cover your eyes with the back of your hand. 
“What baby?” He smirks against your skin and feels the way it makes you squirm with a subtle roll of your hips, he’s not even sure you noticed that you did it.
“No…”Your voice trails off when he pushes your shirt up a little higher, his lips getting bolder, addicted to the way you heat up for him with every soft kiss, “No raspberries.” You finally manage, making him chuckle. But that doesn’t stop him continuing on his path.
“I promise I’ll be nice, m’sorry” He mumbles an apology against your skin, basking in the goosebumps it earns him.
He sits back on his knees, thumbs hooking into the bottom of your tank. His eyes meet yours from underneath his lashes and he wishes he could take a picture of the way you look right now.
“Is this okay?” He asks just to make sure, and the nod of your head with heavy lids is enough for him to press a wet kiss on your sternum before pulling the rest of the offending fabric off, throwing it somewhere on your floor. 
Steve forgets how to breathe the moment his eyes land on you, soft curves just begging for his touch. He can’t help himself when he runs his palms up your sides making your nipples pebble when the pads of his thumbs meet the bottom swell of your breasts. You wonder if he can feel the wings under your rib cage.
“God - honey,” Steve’s words get lost on his tongue when you stare up at him with eyes blown out like his, it makes him run a hand down his face like he can’t believe you’re real. “I’m lucky to just be lookin’ at you.”
His praise makes a shy smile push up your cheeks, his own teeth shining in a grin because of it.
“I wanna look at you too.” You whine a little, reaching down between your legs to tug at the cotton of his shirt with a pout.
“Yeah?” Steve asks, bending back down to hover over you. His nose nudges against your cheek before his lips brush yours, smirking when you nod a little desperate against his mouth.
The kiss he gives you lingers, lighting a fire inside of you, the kind that burns at your fingertips, consuming you like it’s wild and it makes you realize it’s never going to be enough. You’re never going to get enough of the man who looks at you like you hung the stars in his sky, like you were the sun that broke through the rain clouds that followed him around. 
His fingers curl at the hem of his shirt, and it feels like he’s moving in slow motion when he pulls it over his head, adding it to the already growing pile on the floor. His muscles twitch under your gaze, his own nerves finally catching up to him when he realizes just how long it’s been since he’s been with someone like this. Pink dusts his cheeks but he doesn’t look away, not when he sees the way your eyes glaze over at the sight. The dark thatch of hair in the middle of his chest looks soft to the touch from his late night shower and it makes your fingers twitch to touch him. 
The silver of his chain gleams like yours in the moonlight that leaks through your curtains and it makes his skin look like it glows. You give in, running your fingertips through the thick happy trail that’s surrounded by another collection of freckles and moles that you feel the need to kiss and you catch the shudder that runs through him because of it.
“You’re so handsome, Steve.” It comes out a little breathless, and it makes the tips of his ears turn pink.
“Thank you, angel.” He tries to hide his bashfulness in a grin and a hand through his hair, bending back down to press a kiss to your collarbone so you don’t see his smile.
He starts a path up your neck, nipping at sensitive skin along the way to your lips, his own butterflies being spurred on by the whimper it earns him. He hovers over you searching your face for any indication to stop but he’s only met with the kind of look in your eyes that almost has him say it.
 ‘I love you’.
He tries to show you by slotting his lips against yours in a hot breath, like a key to its lock. The bed dips on either side of your head when he goes from his palms to his forearms, chest to chest he wonders if you can feel his heart beating just for you tonight.
The feeling of his skin against yours makes every inch of you feel like a livewire, both of you moaning into the kiss like you’ve waited too long for this. Tongues collide messily when he rolls his hips with a purpose. The pointed pressure on your bundle of nerves, has you keening into him. Your hands slide up his chest through the patch of hair you’d been dreaming about for months, before wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him even closer. Addicted to the way his hard muscles flex against your soft skin.
Box springs squeak when he lets go of all of his weight, it feels like he’s everywhere and it makes your head spin. Your fingers find their way back into the soft hair at the nape of his neck as you fight for dominance with his lips, trying to convey everything you’re feeling right now because words just won’t work.
Pushing your hips up to meet his in a slow grind, the thin material of his shorts does nothing to hide just how big he really is and it makes everything turn sloppy, teeth scraping together with silk between your fingers tugging at his roots a little mean. He smiles when he pulls away to catch his breath, keeping his forehead pressed to yours. His eyes are as black as the night outside that threatens to give away to the sun in just a few hours, they look at you like he can’t believe you’re real, memorizing every detail of your face like you might disappear if he blinks.
“So pretty.” He murmurs before littering kisses down your body, some sweet and some with a nip of his teeth. 
His eyes meet yours in a silent question of ‘is this okay?’, long fingers curling around the elastic band. Tucking your bottom lip between your teeth to hide your shy smile. You nod with a little too much excitement making him smirk before pressing a sweet kiss on the top of your hip, running his nose along the soft your tummy doing it again to the other side.
You hold your breath when he pulls them down your thighs, the tips of his fingers gliding down the sides of your legs as he goes, lips tugging up when you squirm a little because of it. A low groan vibrates from his chest when he realizes you aren’t wearing underwear, glistening with your arousal in the dim light. You’re so wet and all he’s done is kiss you. 
“Baby, baby, baby.” He mutters awestruck by the sight.
A little embarrassed at your body’s reaction, his praise makes your legs try to snap shut but he stops you with a gentle hand on the inside of your knee, spreading them again.
“You’re beautiful, please don’t hide from me.” He begs, taking all of you in again. “So, so, so beautiful, honey.”
His fingers wrap around your ankle, pulling your leg up enough for his lips to kiss the soft skin right above the round bone, his nose skims up your calf to press another one, relishing in the giggle he gets as he keeps on his path to what he really wants. You squeal when he nips at the inside of your knee and you can feel his smirk against your goosebumps. 
Once his kisses get to your thigh, he settles between your legs with his chest to the mattress. It’s hard to remember your own name when he looks up at you through his lashes like that. He hooks your knee over his broad shoulder, his lips dragging a little dirty across your heated skin. He can taste the watermelon that still lingers from his favorite lotion. You were going to be the death of him.
He meets your eyes when he gets high enough for your thigh and hip to connect. Close enough to smell how sweet you are worked up just for him. 
“Can I taste you?” He skims his nose up the plush inside of your thigh when he asks, his eyelids growing heavy just basking in being close to you like this. You could say no, and this would be enough for him but the way you’re already dripping on your sheets makes him insatiable. “You want that?”
You want that?
He watches how your eyes glaze over at his question, the intensity of his gaze makes you want to hide, he was so handsome looking up at you like this. Too bashful to actually say yes, you nod again.
“Can you say it for me?” He squeezes your hip, the pad of his thumb rubbing circles to soothe your nerves like his own weren’t boiling under the surface of his confident demeanor like a volcano ready to explode. 
What if he wasn’t good at this anymore?
“Y- yes, I want you to taste me, handsome you can do whatever you want to me.” The breathy giggle that bubbles passed your lips makes him grin lopsided just how you like, a smugness that wasn’t there before smoldering like a fire in his eyes.
“Yeah? Fuck - Honey, I dream about this.” He groans when he pulls himself closer, the tip of his nose running up your slick folds making you shudder, fingers already tangling in your sheets. “You want me to show you how much I missed you?”
He doesn’t tell you that he’s started to always miss you when you aren’t around.
He accepts your nod this time, your teeth threatening to make your bottom lip bleed when he settles your other leg over his shoulder too, nothing holding him back from you anymore. He takes all of you in with a greedy eyes, his pink tongue darling out to lick his lips when he sees just how much you want this too.
Nothing can prepare you for the first swipe of his flattened tongue between your slick folds, the tip of it catching your clit with just enough pressure for the grip on your sheets to tighten. The butterflies in your rib cage feel like they make their escape in the gasp you let out, his low hum of approval making your toes curl when he does it again. 
“So fucking sweet baby, god of course you are.” 
He doesn’t waste anymore time testing the waters, his self doubt gone with his self control when your hips roll up asking for more. Steve knows now he’ll never say no to you and he’s not shy with the way he buries his face in your pussy. His tongue laps up everything you give him, like he’s hungry with his nose pressed to your bundle of nerves with enough pressure to make your back arch. 
“Ohmygod - Steve.” The moan you let out makes his cock twitch, your fingers reaching down to tangle themselves in his hair, shamelessly pulling him closer. You were better than his dreams.
Your thighs snap closed around his ears after he stops the greedy strokes of his tongue in the tightness of your entrance for his lips to wrap your clit. He sucks with the kind of force that makes your eyes hit the back of your head. His eyebrows marry together when he closes his eyes like you’re the sweetest thing he’s ever tasted. One of hands leaves the dough of your thighs for his thick index finger to take his tongue's place, collecting the slick from between your folds before pushing one knuckle in. 
It makes you gasp a little breathy as your hips push up for more, and he gives it to you, pushing two more knuckles in and you already feel so full. Your walls constrict, fluttering around his single digit like it’s a stretch and he wonders how you’re going to be able to take him. His own hips rut into the mattress in search of some kind of relief while he sets a steady pace between his mouth and his wrist that has you clenching like you’re about to unravel. 
“You close baby? Wanna show me how good it feels?” His question comes out sloppy against your mound, all the color in his eyes is gone meeting yours from between your legs blown wide. When he adds a second finger, it slides in with ease making your eyes hit the back of your head, a low moan bubbling past your lips. Your toes curl with his fingers, jaw going slack with his name in your mouth like a prayer and he’s scared you’re going to make him cum in his pants again. 
“Just like that, fuck - right there - Steve, Steve, Steeeeeve!” The fingers that are tangled in his hair tug rough, your thighs clamping down hard around his head while your body tries to squirm away to run from the intensity of it all, the stubble on his jaw rubbing you raw when he moves his head from side to side drinking in everything you give him.
His hand on your hip locks you in place while you come undone on his tongue and he swears you taste just like sugar when he buries his face in deeper till you whine, pushing on his forehead to stop, overstimulation winning. Heat floods your cheeks when you see the shine from your slick covering the bottom of his lopsided grin when he finally looks up at you.
“So pretty like this,” He mumbles, pressing a kiss to the inside of your shaking thigh. 
You cover your face with your hands, the intensity of your first orgasm and the intimacy of it all overwhelms you, the tightness in your chest threatens to become unbearable. The three words sitting at the tip of your tongue beg to come out from between your lips. 
Not yet.
He trails sticky kisses up your stomach, making sure to pay special attention to the swell of your breasts, pulling them both together in his big hands to give them equal treatment. Shining lips wrap around your sensitive nipples and it's enough for a new wave of arousal to blossom deep inside your belly, a subtle rock of your hips meeting his when he rolls one between his teeth. Insatiable, just like him.
“Steve,” His name comes out around a sigh, your fingers running up his freckled back before tangling themselves in his hair again, addicted to the softness of it.
“Mmm, tell me what you want.” He looks up at you from under thick lashes, lids heavy, and eyes glossy. He’s wrecked.
“You.” The answer is just as simple as it was outside, it's all you’ve ever wanted. You realize that now. The universe bringing you here to this moment with him. This was it.
“Baby,” he looks at you like he means it, like his whole heart is in your hands now and it has been since the day you moved in he just didn’t know it yet, “I’m yours.”
He moves back up your body, leaving wet kisses across sweat slicked skin making sure to suck at the sensitive spot he found just above your collarbone, smiling when you gasp. He’s not expecting to feel your lips against his jaw, bold and sure of themselves by the time they get to the corner of his mouth, dainty fingers pulling his chin down to collect your kiss.
Your lips move like you can finally relax, like you’re home now and he can feel your heartbeat against his chest. This didn’t feel like just sex.
Your hands run down his sides, grinning into his mouth when he chuckles as the tips of your fingers brush against his ribs, you keep that information locked away another time as you hook them in the elastic band of his shorts. His tongue licks a little dirty into your mouth when you start to pull them down his hips, helping you get them to his knees before kicking them off entirely. The length of him feels heavy against your stomach, and it makes you break away from the kiss but his lips stay attached to you.
Your cheek, your jaw, your neck, anywhere he can reach. 
The view makes your breath hitch and get stuck in the back of your throat, walls fluttering around nothing when you see just how big he really is. He’s too busy trying to find new places to make you gasp and all you wanna do is look at him.
“Steve” his name comes out around the gasp he was trying so hard to get by sucking a little bruise behind your ear.
He hums against your skin with his eyes closed, drowning in you. Love drunk off of it. The slow sleepiness from the day creeping in as his body molds to the warmth of you.
“I wanna look at you, too.” Your request is quiet against the rough stubble that fades into his neck, and you feel his Adam’s apple bob against your lips.
“Yeah?”  His voice is hoarse, nose nudging against your jaw when he brings his gaze back to yours, a smile pulls up the apples of his cheeks, crinkling small lines under his eyes.
“Yeah.” You don’t nod this time.
He holds your eyes in his, needing you to know there’s a double meaning in his words when he brings his palm to your cheek, the pad of his thumb tracing the high bone. 
“Whatever you want, I’ll give it to you.”
The mattress bounces when Steve flops next to you on his back, the two of you barely fitting on your queen size with his broad shoulders and long legs. He catches the way your eyes grow big when you sit up on your knees and finally get to see all of him. He reaches out for you, sensing your hesitation at his size
“C’mere, baby, we’ll go slow.”
Heat blooms between your legs when you take his hand, your knees finding a home on either side of his hips. He’s thicker than you’d imagined all those nights with your fingers between your thighs. The big vein running up the length of him protrudes like it’s working overtime, while beads of pearly white smear against the rough patch of hair just below his belly button from his light pink tip. Wrapping his hand around the base, he gives himself a pump to relieve some of the ache from seeing you sitting on top of him like this. Soft curves on display in the moonlight, he can’t wait to see them when it breaks daylight.
“Fuck,” He sighs when you settle above him, “you look gorgeous.”
His words make your confidence peak, your hands finding themselves flat against his chest, the blunt ends of your nails drag through the hair there and you spot another cluster of freckles you hadn’t seen before, you wonder if he’ll let you find them all.
“Look who’s talkin’” You tease, making him laugh as you lean up to steal a kiss. The motion has the length of him slide easily between your slick folds, his tip catching your clit before popping out.
“Jesus Christ.” He sighs against your mouth that’s formed in a silent ‘o’,  rolling his back up in search for more.
“Steve - you’re so - “ The last of your sentence is stolen by a gasp when you grind down to meet his thrust, the tip of him prodding your entrance before gliding up with just the right amount of pressure to make you both moan. 
“I’m so what?” He asks a little smug, arms circling the curve of your waist to pull you closer, dragging you over the length of him again, it makes you shudder in his grasp. 
He catches against where you beg for more of him, fluttering around the tip, your walls try to suck him in. A low growl rumbles from his chest when he tries to fit a little more. It’s your hips that roll, and it's just enough for him to push all the way in with a little resistance.
“Goddd,” You whine, feeling the fullest you’ve ever been, your walls stinging, desperately trying to accommodate his size. A low huff exhales through your nose when you sit up straight, letting your nails drag over the beauty marks that litter his stomach before finishing your sentence, “so big.” 
“Yeah, but look at you takin’ it.” He groans with pinched brows, eyes transfixed on where he disappears inside of you. Arousal coating the thick thatch of hair that frames him, wetting his lips as he watches the way you grind your clit against it letting him fill you to the hilt. “So good for me baby, so beautiful, - fuck! - so gorgeous.”
His praise has you clenching around him, your mouth falling open when you feel him twitch because of it. His big hands find the tops of your thighs, the pads of his fingers leaving fires in their wake while making their way to your hips. He squeezes softly when he gets there, guiding your lazy thrusts before searching for your hands. 
You watch him intertwine your fingers with curious eyes, his gaze transfixed on yours as he holds them at your sides, rolling his hips up to push even deeper.
“Oh god,” He does it again only this time if feels like there’s nowhere else for him to fit and it makes your eyes screw shut, “ohmyfuckinggod - Steeeve!” 
“Right there? Yeah? Is that it?” He grunts trying to repeat it and your hands squeeze his in an iron grip. “Come on baby, I need to see you.”
It’s hard to open your eyes, the slow drag of his cock against your slick walls is almost overwhelming. Connected to him in a way that is going to change you forever. The pad of his thumb rubs soft on the top of your hand, bringing you back to him. 
“You’re eyes are too pretty to be keepin’ them from me.” He smiles when you finally meet his gaze and it’s enough to punch the air out of your lungs. 
“I love you.” The three words slip past your kiss bitten lips before you can even think long enough to stop them and it makes everything come to a standstill. 
“What’d you just say?” Steve’s voice is quiet, something unrecognizable in his tone that makes all your nerves come back like they never left.
“I - I -“ the harsh sting of rejection is written all over your face and the feeling of you trying to untangle your hands snaps him back to reality. To you.
“Hey, hey, hey, no honey.” He doesn’t let you go, squeezing till his knuckles turn white “I just wanted to make sure I heard you right, because I’ve been wanting to say that to you since the fourth of July.”
You light up for him in a way he’s never seen before and he thinks this is the most beautiful you’ve ever been. 
“Really?” You whisper a little shy, your own smile becoming uncontainable. 
He lets your hands go to wrap his arms back around your waist, sitting up as he pulls you with him on his lap. Chest to chest with his back against your headboard, you’re even closer to him like this. The new position has him impossibly deep, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix making you keen pretty. 
“Yeah, really.” He sighs, wishing he had gotten  to say it first. 
One arm keeps you close while the other wraps around your back, the warmth of his palm spreading wide across it. The stray hair that you missed more than you realized falls over his forehead and there’s nothing stopping you from pushing it back. Fingernails dragging through his soft hair, making his eyes close until he feels the slow drag of your hips spurring him on. 
He doesn’t hesitate to pick up the pace, especially when your arms wrap around his neck and he feels your hardened nipples against chest. The new angle has his thrusts hitting the spot inside of you no one else has ever been able to find, the one you almost didn’t think existed. The tip of him catches it again and again.
The sound of your slick fills the quiet of your room, growing louder with every roll of your hips that connect with his. The light sheen of sweat that coats both of you has you sliding against his thighs, the cool air from the A/C doing nothing as the two of you get lost like this. 
Your second orgasm builds at the same time your body starts to slump against his, your muscles screaming at you for a break. 
“Getting close, huh?” He asks, with a forehead pressed to yours, lips teasing but never touching with each thrust.
All you can do is nod, your eyes not daring to leave his again. He wouldn’t let you even if you tried, a hazel forest turned night, you never wanted to leave the depths of them. 
“So good for me, let go pretty baby, I got you. Let me do all the work.” He picks up his pace, pushing deeper in with every roll of his hips, feeling the way you squeeze around him while your body starts to shake, the high you’d been chasing threatening to take you. 
Holding your gaze, the hand on your back slides up the dip of your spine, curling around the back of your neck. He closes the last bit of space, pulling you to his lips. It’s sloppy and sweet, neither one of you trying to deepen it, just enjoying the way you move together like it was supposed to be like this forever. 
“Fuck- I love you so much it scares me.” Steve admits when he pulls away, his confession is the last straw that sends you over the edge. Tears stinging the corners of your eyes when you cum hard around him for the second time.
Your fingers tangle his hair, crashing your lips into his with tear stained cheeks and he can feel everything you put inside of it just for him. It’s enough to finally let himself unravel for the first time in years with a loud moan and his face buried in your neck. 
It warms deep in your gut when he spills inside of you, his body trembling with the intensity of it all. Your thighs shake clinging to him, both of you too scared to let go in the irrational fear that you’ll just wake up from a really good dream. You can feel the wetness of his tears against your skin, your nails finding their way to his scalp. He hums against you when you kiss his temple, nuzzling deeper until you feel his lips against the underside of your jaw.
The two of you sit there like this in a mess of tangled limbs. Sweet kisses and even sweeter words all spoken just barely above a whisper until he’s soft enough to slide out on his own. He takes his time cleaning you up after with giant hands that treat you like glass. 
It’s like muscle memory the way he pulls you to his chest under the covers, like this isn’t your first sleepover. The tip of his nose runs along the length of yours with shining eyes and an even brighter smile, kissing you softly with another whispered “you’re so beautiful”.
Streams of sunshine break through your blinds when the two of you finally settle in, buried deep in his arms surrounded by the lingering scent of pine and him, the sounds of his even breathing are enough for you to give into your heavy lids. 
It’s only when you’re on the verge of dreams you’re sure will be filled with him that you hear it:
“I love you, tough girl.”
🌇 -> epilogue
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beta’d by @chechelia & dividers by @chechelia
(thank you for everything cece ♥️ and a special thank you to @superblysubpar for betaing the first half of this series, i love you both dearly. & also @carolmunson for always talking to me about our boys, and helping me make this world a little bigger ♥️ ily)
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bambihrt · 3 months
Note
Hi ! Would you be up for writing some angst to fluff with Adam ? My poor angel deserves some love !
Yes of course! Now this is some very light angst but hopefully you enjoy it, Adam is such an interesting character I hope I’m able to do him some justice haha
- 🤍
Dating the first man to ever exist is no easy task. He’s a popular guy and is usually the center of attention in any situation. However you couldn’t help but feel jealous over those who get to spend a lot of time with him. In particular the angel Lute. Anytime you see your boyfriend when not at each other’s homes or on a date, she’s always with him. The way she looks at him just doesn’t sit right. You can’t help but think there could be something more going on.
It’s not that you don’t trust Adam but it’s only natural to have doubts when your boyfriend is often around another woman. Now envy is a sin, you know that so you’d never voice this opinion out loud. But as time goes on, these feelings start to simmer until they start affecting your relationship.
Adam could tell something was up. He had no clue though what this could be. It’s unlike you to be so quiet when he’s talking to you. He was telling you this story on how Lute and him were chasing down this sinner on the last extermination day.
“You should have seen the look on his face babe! Lute had cornered him into this alleyway and then right when he thought he’d gotten away… BAM I jump out from behind and spear him straight through the fuckin’ middle! And then Lute-“
“Wow sounds like you and Lute are the perfect team.” This comment of yours sounded less enthusiastic and more snarky than he’d hoped for.
“Well yeah I guess but that’s not really the point (y/n), I was trying to tell you how badass I was,” Adam was giving you the perfect opportunity to ignore the tone of what you last said and move on but you couldn’t get out of this headspace.
“Yeah Lute sounds pretty badass too from the countless stories you tell me.”
“Woah babe what’s this about?”
“Just seems to me like Lute’s always on your mind Adam from how you’re always with her and talking about her. Maybe you should date her instead.”
Adam huffed and got up, “yeah yknow what? Fuck this, go take this attitude to someone who could give a shit, I’m just trying to have a nice time and you’re sounding like an insecure bitch right now.”
After that comment Adam stormed out of your room and slammed the door leaving you alone to wallow in self pity. For the next week you didn’t hear from your boyfriend or even see him out. You couldn’t help but think you’ve ruined your relationship with the argument you had. Until you wake up to your doorbell ringing.
Opening your door to Adam standing in front, scratching the back of his neck.
“Look (y/n) I thought you were being completely irrational but then imagined our roles were reversed and I’d be pissed if you were hanging around some guy all day.”
“So what are you trying to say?”
“That I’m sorry. Even though I’ve had two wives, I’m not the best at relationships so next time something’s up just talk to me about it,” after he finished saying this, you stood onto your tippy toes and pulled the mask off your boyfriend’s worried face.
“I’m sorry too Adam, I shouldn’t have taken my worries out on you and just communicated from the start, that wasn’t fair of me,” you gave him a soft smile of which he returned with a hug and pulled you into his arms, making his way to the couch where you two snuggled under a blanket and just held each other while watching your favorite movie.
As you were starting to drift off you thought you’d heard your boyfriend mumble, “I love you (y/n), I’m going to marry you some day so please don’t think I have eyes for anyone else but you.” But who knows maybe you were really sleepy and imagined it. However the twinkle in Adam’s eyes when he watched you close your own seemed to hint at it being true.
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zuzu-draws · 4 days
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So after the spoilers for Chap 257 dropped, I saw some tweets clarifying the meaning of the Kanji Sukuna used in the chapter when referring to his mother, and the overall reveals in the chapter got me thinking.
I’m making this post as a way of gathering my thoughts, personal speculations and where I think all of this connects to Sukuna’s character and the information Gege has given us over the years. Nothing I say is by any means new information, but like I said, I’m just collecting my thoughts here. By the way, just a warning, this post contains SPOILERS for the JJK Manga! If you don’t like that, please don’t read this!
Something I’ve noticed is that the theme of “Hunger” and symbolism of “Cooking/Food” is heavily referenced with Sukuna throughout the Manga. Gege in a previous Fanbook has disclosed Sukuna’s favorite Hobby to be “Eating”.
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This theme is again very much ingrained within Sukuna’s cursed techniques and even his Domain Expansion, the “Malevolent Shrine”. With his two main techniques being “Dismantle” and “Cleave” are cutting-type attacks. He is also able to use a Flame-Arrow, and Fire is essential for making Food. The Shrine in his Domain Expansion literally has mouths on all sides, looking eager to chew down anything in-front of them!
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This symbolism also heavily influences Sukuna’s own manner of speech, and the way he speaks to other characters in the series as well. With his post-fight chat with Jogo before his death, Sukuna mentions Jogo lacking the “Hunger” to take control of his desires, preventing him from reaching the heights of Gojo Satoru. Before the Start of their fight in Shinjuku, Sukuna called Gojo a “Nameless Fish on top of his cutting board”, and that he was going to start by “Peeling off the scales”(refering to Gojo’s infinity). There’s also further symbolism that supports this by analyzing the Kanji and meaning of Sukuna’s “Malevolent Shrine” but I’m not very educated on that so I won’t be opening that point here.
What all of this points to is that Eating and Food……is extremely important to Sukuna, to the point that it literally affects him in manners innumerable.
Eating is an instinct, a necessity for the survival of every single living being.
And In the face of extreme Hunger and starvation, even those with the strongest will could lose their Humanity and revert to the basic animalistic side of their existence. (The Heian Period also had a Famine, although I believe the timing to be a bit off, but do with this info as you see fit)
In JJK Chapter 257, it is revealed to us that Sukuna and his Twin were most likely starving in the womb of their starving mother.
On the brink of starvation, Sukuna had to consume his “other self”(his twin), so that he could survive.
Btw, this tweet and this thread gives additional characterisation to Sukuna:
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Link to the original thread: Link.
More context (and reactions :P):
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Link to original thread: Here
This reveals to us that indeed, Sukuna was born a twin. And as we all know, “Twins” are seen with extreme scrutiny in Jujutsu Society, they’re not well liked. This too in a period where Cursed Spirits and Jujutsu Sorcery was at its peak, it is not far-fetched to assume that his Mother may not have been treated very well by the people in her surroundings, especially as she bore twins.
When Kashimo asks if Sukuna was born the Strongest or if he made himself the Strongest, this is the response Sukuna gave to him:
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When you think about it, how do you think the people around them would have reacted when the woman: who was supposed to birth two twins, gave birth to a single child instead? and that child had consumed his other twin in the womb itself?
No doubt people would’ve been horrified, disgusted and even revulsed. With the woman and her newborn child.
This would’ve led to their further ostracisation in the already very close-minded society. Unable to fend for herself and her newborn child, it must’ve been difficult for Sukuna’s mother to survive. I feel like somewhere along the line, Sukuna was left alone to fend for himself at an extremely young age. To protect himself from both Curses and Society alike.
This is why I believe Sukuna knows what true starvation, weakness and hunger feels like. Both in the emotional and literal sense. He was left without another person caring about him or his well-being, in a cut-throat period where it was “Fight or be killed”.
Powerful curses roamed all across Japan, nowhere was safe. Simply be strong, or you'll die. There's no room for weakness. And initially, a kid!Sukuna was weak, as anyone would be in the beginning when they're just starting out in this world. (and maybe, he didn't have much to eat, leading to long periods of starvation? :') )
I believe it is this debilitating hunger, and feeling of weakness that eventually led to Sukuna’s current Hedonistic mindset.
He’s essentially traumatised by it, and believes that it was his own weakness that led him to experience this sheer starvation. That he deserved to feel this way because he was weak then. Perhaps, the people around him were right, that as long as they have the power and strength to overcome anything, they’re free to do as they please; And there is nothing anyone else could do about it.
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I feel like the irony here is that Sukuna himself, must’ve been a “weakling” before eventually rising the ranks to become History’s Strongest Sorcerer. This is also why he values Strength so much.
Ultimately, Sukuna has decided that there was nothing more important than being strong enough to fulfill your own desires. And “eating” is one of his most important desires. It’s his favourite thing to do, the one he derives the most pleasure out of. And like an animal, whose main focus is to consume, consume and consume. He too, simply consumes.
Most morals likely have no meaning to him. He doesn’t care who he hurts, what he does, as long as he’s able to get what he wants. And this isn’t limited to eating.
This is why people referring to Sukuna as a “Natural Disaster” is so befitting of him. Because Natural Disasters also don’t care about what or who they’re destroying, they just come and go, wreaking havoc appropriate for their nature and magnitude.
I believe Sukuna himself has said lines similar in nature, when talking to Kashimo:
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Now I’m not sure how Sukuna perceives or even experiences this “Love”, because I think he has a rather very warped idea of it. I do think that this definition of love is similar to the one that Gojo also understands, but I don’t think he knows what “love” truly is. I’m not sure how I could comment on this, but I do think that Sukuna’s emotionally starved, whether he realises that or not.
Because, like Kashimo himself asked Sukuna “What is the point of dividing your soul into 20 different parts and then traversing across time if you’re satisfied with this?” we do not know the answer to that yet.
But many people have speculated that “Black Box” panels in JJK manga represent a curse (either self-inflicted or put by someone) on the speaker. Like, take a look over here where Sukuna reiterates the same dialogue, except it looks like he’s trying to reassure himself:
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This once again shows that Sukuna has only ever strived for himself, in the same hedonistic fashion, to a very very extreme degree. It is possible that he's been lacking something, and he himself does not realise that he’s lacking it. Maybe it was this subconscious feeling, that led to Sukuna agreeing to Kenjaku’s plan of dividing his soul into 20 different parts, and to traverse across time as a Cursed Object.
Sukuna’s an incredibly complex character, and I’m excited to see where this goes. Gege has put extra care in the way he characterizes and depicts Sukuna, and again, I’m really sad that a lot of that characterization gets lost in translation. Still, I’m going to try my best to understand and get the most accurate feel of his character as I possibly can.
If you made it this far, Thank you for reading! And if you would like, please do leave a comment in the tags or replies because I would love to read what other people think of this and just Sukuna in general. I do not see a lot of people doing critical analysis of him, and a lot of his actions are seemingly swept under the rug. I don’t like that, so hopefully this contributes to people focusing more on Sukuna and his character. (/^v^)/ <3
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harmonictechnicality · 8 months
Text
*no rest for the wicked*
my teensy contribution to @thefreakandthehair's spicy six summer collection 💖 | word count: 3k | rating: T | ao3 link | also, this wouldn't exist if @chocoarts didn't send me a sketch that immediately set off sparklers in my brain so bless youuu ✨
Twenty-six hours. That’s how long Eddie has been up. Twenty-six hours and twelve minutes. The heaviness hanging in his eyes is medieval-level torturous, and the cramp in his left calf is probably permanent by now. 
A sane person who enjoys sleeping might be asking, ‘Why? Why put yourself through this when there’s a perfectly decent bed down the hall?’ And Eddie would be forced to reply back with two, simple words:
Concert. Tickets.
That’s right, Eddie is actively murdering his own brain cells to win two vip tickets on the radio. Twenty-seven hours ago, it seemed like a grand idea. Genius, even. It’s free and minimal effort - he just has to call the station every hour on the dot. No biggie, right?
Ha, sure. Tell that to the muscles in his eyelids.
“How much longer do you have?” Chrissy asks, snagging a magazine from the stack on the couch.
Eddie checks his watch. Huffs out a laugh. “Let’s just say, I could watch the entire Star Wars trilogy including the credits for each one.”
“Translating to...?”
“Seven-ish hours.” Robin quickly chimes. She pops out of her bedroom and joins Chrissy’s side, instantly threading their hands together. They share a look, one that makes Eddie believe in nice things, even in his state of misery. It’s their superpower, injecting their optimistic outlook into the atmosphere. Infectious in the best way. 
“I always forget that you speak fluent nerd.” Chrissy snorts.
“Ouch.” Robin gasps and pulls away, stomping off to their room. Too dramatic to be believable. “Get back to bed before I actually feel offended by that.”
Normally, Eddie is charmed by how hopelessly in love his roommates are with each other. But right now, they are his mortal enemies (well, tied with The Clock), because they get to sleep and he gets to stare at the lightbulb in the ceiling fan. Every now and then, it flickers, which never fails to startle him. 
Good. He desperately needs the extra alertness. 
Another forty-five minutes go by before anything noteworthy happens. Eddie’s other roommate gets off his night shift around one in the morning. The front door squeals as it opens, crackling all the adrenaline leftover in Eddie’s body. 
“Scared the shit out of me, man.” Which could’ve been a literal statement if Eddie hadn’t just taken a bathroom break.
“Gotta get this door fixed.” Steve says. That’s what he always says when it creaks. The reaction never changes, always skating his fingers over the door hinges, mouth twisting to the side. Hands on his hips in disapproval. Eddie has to look away before Steve breaks out his insufferably cute ‘foot tap’ routine. “Hey - why are you still up?”
Ah, yes. Just what Eddie needed. A reminder that it’s fucking late. He finds the energy (or common decency, who knows) to point at the phone. Then to the radio.
“You’re still doing that, huh?”
Eddie nods twice.
“Damn, I’ve never heard you this quiet.” Steve sounds genuinely surprised. A little too smug for Eddie’s liking. “Didn’t know your mouth could stay in a straight line for this long.”
There it is. The rich boy smartassery that will never die. Always lurking in the depths of his genetic makeup.
Eddie claps, total deadpan.
The conversation lulls while Steve messes around in the kitchen for a bit. He’s noisily opening cabinets and clanking dishes around in the sink. Eventually, he walks back into the living room with two beers. 
Both for him apparently. “Well, listen,” he starts out. Kicks his feet up on the coffee table. “I’m pretty wired after work, so if you need some company-”
“Six… hours… left.” Eddie musters out.
“Okay well, I doubt I’ll last that long. But I can give it a shot.”
Eddie smirks, raises both eyebrows. “There’s a dirty joke somewhere in there. Too tired to find it though.”
“Good to know the horny part of your mind is still awake.” Steve gives Eddie a small pat on the head. 
“Oh? That’s a good thing?”
“Depends on who you ask.”
“I’m asking you.” It’s too direct, Eddie hears it. And now it’s just Out There - his inability to flirt in a subtle way. And yeah, he could blame it on sleep deprivation, but he’s never been known for his mastery of ambiguity so…
The pause goes on long enough for the light to flicker again, the room growing darker with it. Steve takes a swig of his drink and smiles. “It’s good to know, Ed.”
The light flickers even darker.
Eddie is fully awake after that. Which could’ve been part of Steve’s plan - stimulate his brain with flirty comments and keep him up with those melty smiles. It’s no secret that Eddie turns into a hair-twirling loser around this guy. 
Even after living together for a year and seeing one another’s most disgusting habits, he still feels this way. Tight throat, stomach flips. Purely smitten in a way that would nauseate deadbeat poets.
In this moment, however, it’s a wonderful remedy to staying awake throughout the rest of the night. Much more effective than energy drinks and Tootsie Rolls.
Steve ends up on the floor, leaning against the edge of the couch. He sips another beer, recounting some bullshit that happened during his shift at the hotel. Eddie does his best impression of Listening to Steve’s stories, but the words are just buzzing around the glow of Steve’s hair and the shine on his lips. Nodding at seemingly appropriate times is all Eddie currently can offer.
“Sleeping with your eyes open, Munson?”
Eddie blinks hard. “Huh?”
“Creepy, but impressive.” Steve laughs, tapping his hand against Eddie’s leg. “You should add that to the Special Skills column on your resumé.”
“Bold of you to assume I have a resumé.”
They spend the next hour doing just that - adding useless skills to Eddie’s nonexistent resumé. It keeps them busy. Content. Steve smacks Eddie’s knee anytime he laughs, leaves his hand longer every time. Maybe that’s all in Eddie’s semi-dormant mind, especially since Steve shows casual affection to all of his friends. But the warmth of his palm is real enough to have Eddie fully committed to making Steve laugh as much as possible.
“What about… Expert Paper Clip Chain-Maker?” Steve suggests. 
Eddie stares at the chain in his hand, the one he was oblivious to creating. He whips it around like a lasso and then shrugs. “A bit wordy.”
“So you’re saying length matters?”
“Christ on toast, Harrington. You’re awfully quick to jump to that conclusion, aren’t you?”
Steve doesn’t answer, just starts laughing again. Eddie didn’t even need to tell a shitty joke this time. 
And when Steve’s hand hits his knee, sliding slightly up his thigh, Eddie laughs along with him. It’s the only way to cover up the heat rushing to his face.
Eddie enters the realm of delirium with three hours left in his challenge. He slumps onto the floor next to Steve, nudging his shoulder, staring into his sleep-heavy eyes. It’s four in the morning, inhibitions be damned.
“Do you think if you ever visit Europe, they’d call you Harring-metric-ton?” Eddie picks a piece of lint off Steve’s sleeve. Perfect excuse to reach out, move in closer.
Steve groans. “Yikes. But yes, that question keeps me up at night.”
“So that’s why you’re still awake. See, I knew it wasn’t because of my silly little concert tickets.” 
As soon as the words leave his lips, Eddie convinces himself that it’s the truth. Which is so dumb, so stupid. But this seed of insecurity keeps him going, fully projecting his assumptions onto Steve’s harmless comment. Somewhere deep down, buried underneath his exhaustion, Eddie knows it was a joke. But he can’t seem to shut up anymore.
“The riddle has been solved, folks! We finally know why Stevie here is still awake.” Eddie exclaims, flinging his arms out to the side. “Alert Scooby and the gang at once! Mystery Incorporated can finally pack up their magnifying glasses and pursue careers with better health insurance. Ones that covers vision costs this time. It’s what dear, ol' Velma deser-”
“Eddie.” Steve places a hand on Eddie’s arm, holding him still. Was he moving? Oh god, was he shaking? 
Fucking mortifying.
Steve’s thumb swipes across Eddie’s skin, tracing diagonal lines back and forth. “You’re rambling.”
“And you’re…” Eddie loses focus. He looks down at the hypnotic patterns that Steve is making. “There. Doing that.”
Steve stops briefly to flip Eddie’s hand over, starts tracing the lines in his palm instead. The pressure makes Eddie’s heart lurch up into his throat. He can feel it thumping in his neck, faster with every stroke of Steve’s fingers. All he wants to do is close his hand around them, keep Steve there for the rest of the night. Longer if he’d let him.
“I can stop if it’s weird.” Steve’s voice is so much quieter than it was earlier. 
Don’t stop. Eddie thinks. Can’t say it like that because gross. Humiliating and gross. “It’s not weird.”
Steve keeps his focus on the motion, Eddie does the same. They stay like this for a while, just watching. Intently staring over the invisible lines like pages in a novel. Eddie is pretty sure he’s breathing too loud, can hear it above the whistle in the air conditioner. Wonders if Steve can hear it too. 
Probably.
“That’s not why I’m staying awake.” Steve says, never breaking the pattern.
“No?”
“It’s who I’m staying awake for.”
Steve finally stops, right in the center of Eddie’s hand. The air in the room goes dense, weighted with acknowledgment. Something has changed and Eddie can feel it everywhere. 
He tilts forward, pulling his gaze away from his hand and up at Steve’s lips. If he weren’t stuck between half-awake and total-delirium, Eddie would just do it. Kiss Steve the way he’s always wanted to. Syrupy slow and deep. Savoring every second.
He could do it right now, right this second. But his focus starts drifting as he closes his eyes. “Did Chrissy tell you?” Eddie grumbles, almost unintelligible. 
“Tell me what?”
Eddie’s head falls, landing somewhere on Steve’s chest. He inhales the scent of laundry detergent (because Steve and Chrissy are the only avid laundry-doers in the apartment). It’s so soothing, drawing him further into a dreamlike place.
“Tell me what, Ed?”
“That I…” Eddie is nearly asleep before he can finish the thought. The confession:
‘That I’m crazy about you.’
Sunlight hits Eddie first, startles him so much that he jolts upward. Fully awake. It takes a few seconds of furiously rubbing his eyes before the dread kicks in. 
Morning.
It’s morning.
“Shit.”
Eddie fell asleep.
Steve fell asleep.
“Shitshitshit. So many shits!” He fumbles through the labyrinth of blankets and pillows around him, snatching his watch from the coffee table:
10:24 a.m.
“Goddamnit!”
Eddie sinks back down to the floor, clutching the phone that serves him no purpose anymore. All of those hours of waiting and calling for nothing. Even if general admission wasn’t already sold out, it’s not like Eddie could afford tickets on his own. He can barely keep up with his share of the rent. Chrissy had to cover for his grocery run last week and he still hasn’t paid her back.
It’s just so expected too - for him to fuck up like this. Always letting opportunities slip through the cracks, making careless mistakes. No one will be surprised that he failed at such a simple task like calling a fucking radio station.
Eddie sets the phone back on the table and cleans up the living room in a daze. Every now and then, he mutters under his breath about being a total moron. He stays relatively quiet for the most part though. No use in throwing a bitchfest while Steve is blissfully conked out three feet away.
Of course he looks good sleeping too, even in the midst of Eddie’s breakdown. Unfair.
Just before heading back to his room, Eddie hears that familiar door creak. Same one that always sets off Steve’s inner handyman tendencies. 
He looks back to see Chrissy padding towards him with a blanket wrapped around her. For someone who hasn’t had their mood-altering cup of coffee yet, she looks extremely pleased to see him. Maybe she knows about the fate of the concert tickets. Maybe this is an early-risers pity party.
Fucking yay.
“Chris, please don’t try to-”
His words are muffled by Chrissy throwing her arms (and blanket cape) around him. She’s so bouncy, the way she always gets with Robin whenever their favorite song comes on at the karaoke bar. He pats her on the back and clears his throat, still trying to piece together what this exchange could be about. However, Eddie is functioning on a few hours of sleep, so his cognitive skills are groggy at best.
She gives him one more squeeze and then looks up, positively gleaming. “I knew it! I knew it would finally happen!”
“That I’d screw up for the umpteenth time in my life? Gee thanks, Chris.” Eddie says.
“What are you talking about?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about you and Steve!” She whisper-yells back.
Was she snooping on them last night? He wouldn’t put it past her, snoopiness is the foundation of their friendship. Well, whatever Chrissy thought she saw, she’s wrong. Sure, Steve and Eddie flirted, both letting some potentially mutual feelings slip out.
But it was all cut short by Eddie passing out mid-flirt. God knows how Steve took that reaction. Probably assumed Eddie was so bored that he would rather sleep than makeout with him. Or worse, that Eddie was pretending to sleep to let him down easy.
Christ, he doesn’t wanna think about that right now. Not while he’s still mourning the loss of his precious tickets.
“Hate to break it to you, honeyjam, but nothing happened.” Eddie shakes his head, gesturing to Steve who hasn’t budged from the recliner. “It’s just me over here and Steve over there. No conjunction connecting us together in that way.”
He can already tell Chrissy isn’t buying it. She’s getting that little forehead wrinkle right above her eyebrows, just like an angry cartoon character. Her best attempt at intimidation. “You didn’t see what I saw.” 
“Gay desperation?”
“No, you jackass. Come here!”
Chrissy yanks Eddie into his bedroom, demanding for him to lock the door. He listens, mainly because the intimidation is starting to work a little. They sit at the edge of the bed and she begins to explain everything she saw:
Steve constructing a wall of blankets and pillows around Eddie to ensure he slept comfortably. Steve waiting by the phone, tapping his foot in that insufferably cute way that Eddie loves so much. Steve scoring the tickets, celebrating quietly to himself.
“How long were you standing at the door, weirdo?” Eddie teases her to avoid the way his stomach is twisting around her words. 
Chrissy shushes him and squeals. “And he kissed your cheek!”
“Liar.”
“He did, I swear! He kissed you on the cheek or the chin or the nose. I don't know which one for sure because my view was obstructed by all of your hair.”
Eddie instinctively combs his fingers through a few strands, undoing the knotted pieces. Not all of them, but enough to keep his hands busy while he thinks through this. Processing. “And you’re sure it wasn’t a dream?”
“Positive.”
“What about a hallucination? Didn’t Byers make a batch of those infamous brownies again?”
Chrissy gives a deep sigh. “Whatever. You’re hopeless.” She shrugs the blanket back over her arms and heads toward the door. More than a fair assessment, Eddie can’t argue even if he wanted to (he always does). 
He stares at the line of posters along his wall, letting Chrissy’s words replay over and over. Imagining what it might have felt like. If Steve’s breath was warm or if his lips were soft. Eddie wonders how it looked to have Steve dipping down to his level. Staying so quiet, so careful not to disturb him. The visuals swarm his head until there’s nothing left but Steve. 
Him and Steve. Connecting them together in that way after all.
So, Eddie gets up and walks back into the living room. He takes in the view of Steve curled up in the recliner, mouth slightly parted open. Chest falling with every sniffle, not quite a snore.
There’s so many emotions while looking at him. Eddie can’t just pin one down to fully comprehend what's going on. All he can do is repeat the scene that’s occupying his mind, settling in his bones.
“Here,” he whispers, placing another blanket across Steve’s lap. It’s feathery gentle, more than he intends for it to be. So gentle that Steve doesn’t shift or stir. 
Eddie takes a deep breath and bends down, close enough to notice all the little details. The ones he’s been too sheepish to indulge in before last night. 
The tiny hairs on Steve’s forearm. The creases in his t-shirt. The bit of dried toothpaste on his chin. None of it should make his cheeks feel this flushed, but they do.
He lets the rush of bravery wash through him as he kisses Steve on the tip of his nose. Just the way Steve must’ve done to him. It’s swift, lighter than he means for it to be. Barely touching. But it’s enough to switch his heart rate up a few notches, pulsing jumping in his wrist.
Eddie steps away, waiting to see if Steve wakes up. Not entirely sure if he wants that or if he’d rather keep this memory to himself. 
“Thanks… by the way.” Eddie adds, brushing the tips of his fingers over Steve’s hand. Wishing he could trace the lines in his palm. Rewind back to last night and pause it there indefinitely. “I’ll tell you again when you’re up, but yeah.”
“Thank you, Steve Harrington.”
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koqabear · 8 months
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2KKKKK!!!! Congrats! I have a song equation!
Tinnitus BUT (demo ver) + enemy!Tae + angst + smut + slight fluff well since they do fuck- but they're still enemies on end.
♫: TXT, Tinnitus (Demo Ver.) // join the 2k event and request something!
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"You always tried to tell your friends you don’t get along with Kang Taehyun. Did it work? Absolutely not. Now you’re stuck with him again, and there’s no telling what insanity will take over you tonight."
taehyun x fem! reader // wc: 2.6k (everyone cheer i’m getting the hang of it) // enemies to enemies, hinted fwb (the term friends used loosely), smut, MDNI.
warnings: tyun is an asshole sorry guys. slight hard dom!tyun, a bit of switch!mc, semi-public sex(?), unprotected sex, hair pulling, marking, biting, handjob, slight strength kink, hand restraining, degrading, creampie, slight cockwarming
notes: i’m so close to finally following my own rules abt the word count limit…! (i can’t keep getting away with this 😔)
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Kang Taehyun was the bane of your existence— that much was obvious to anyone that spent any time around you.
He was arrogant, cocky, and overall an eye-sore; the first time you met, you actually gave him the benefit of the doubt, getting introduced through mutual friends and eventually forming a group that (unfortunately) included him. 
It was bad from the start. He was a complete smart-ass and had a knack for making casual, blunt comments that would immediately put you down; you’re not even sure what the fuck you did to him, but you do know that you never let a single one of those snide remarks slide— jabbing back just as hard, showing that you weren’t all bark and that your bite hurt more than one would expect— it got to the point where your friends knew that they should hold you back on a leash when you were around each other. 
Sometimes, you couldn’t even look at him; which is why you preferred to go to group events if you were explicitly told that Kang Taehyun would not be there, knowing that you would only ruin the night if you tagged along, more likely to start a fight than to try to actually enjoy yourself.
So to say that you were currently angry as you sat at a random table of a club, gritting your teeth and tapping your fingers against the table as you stared out at the dance floor, unable to look straight in fear of catching a glimpse of Kang Taehyun, was a severe understatement— you were fucking fuming. Your jaw aches from how hard you’re gritting your teeth together.
“Are you gonna dance, or are you so up-tight that you can’t even do that?”
“Leave me the fuck alone. I don’t wanna hear it.”
You’ve been dealing with his witty remarks all night. He’s just come back from the dance floor, hot and sweaty as the sight of a random girl getting all up on him practically made you gag; if you hadn’t been chosen as the designated driver tonight, you would’ve left long ago.
What’re friends for… you think bitterly, staring down at the water you only got to keep yourself occupied— you can feel Taehyun’s stare burning into the side of your face, and it only serves to make you more irritated as time goes on, hoping that he’ll stop being such a creep and look away.
“What is your problem?” you hiss, finally having enough after approximately one and a half songs of him doing this. Like expected, your eyes meet his, and a slow smile creeps its way onto his face as he leans his head back, resting against the booth as he looks at you with low-lidded, hazy eyes— he’s having fun getting under your skin, that much you can tell. You resist the urge to reach over and slap the stupid look off his face.
“Am I doing something wrong?” he asks, and you’re forced to lean toward him slightly from how quietly he talks, barely hearing him over the loud music that blasts all around you— you scoff at his words. 
“Don’t act stupid, you’ve been giving me problems all night— even now, don’t think I didn’t feel the way you were looking at me all weird.”
“I feel bad,” he confesses, ignoring the way you give him a scathing look as he continues, head lolling to the side lazily to watch the packed dance floor, “You looked so pathetic over here by yourself— someone would think your friends ditched you.”
“I’m the designated driver,” you point out through gritted teeth.
“Doesn’t mean you can’t have fun.” he glances back at you, and you jolt slightly at the way his gaze rakes over you slowly, “‘Cause this…? It's just sad.”
“And what exactly would fun be to you? Practically fucking some other girl on the dance floor to the rhythm of some shitty pop song?” Fuck, he’s done it again. He’s got you riled up and it’s only making you even angrier that he’s able to get you to this point— it doesn’t help that he’s laughing condescendingly at your sudden outburst, shaking his head and muttering something that you’re unable to hear from the obscene volume of the music. 
“Why are you here then?” he asks, tilting his head slightly and raising that stupid brow of his, a habit you’ve quickly come to hate, “To have intellectual conversations with other patrons?”
You don’t know what takes over you. Maybe you’ve finally been pushed to your limit, pent up and frustrated with the fact that your friends continue to brush off the fact that you and Taehyun simply do not get along— your fingers might just break your glass from how tightly you’re gripping onto it, standing up so suddenly that your chair slides away from you— but you do know that this was long overdue and well-deserved, throwing the rest of your water straight at him; a smile twitches at the corner of your lips as you take in the way his eyes screw shut and his brows knit together, left frozen as you take this moment to walk away, before you decide to say fuck it and really show him your bite. 
You walk mindlessly— the dance floor is too packed, and you feel as though your body is way too lit up and restless to try and join in— so you’re making your way to the bathrooms, the hall lonely and poorly lit as you open the women’s restroom, slipping inside and ready to lock the door so you can finally take a moment to compose yourself—
“Are you fucking insane?” you don’t think you’ve ever seen Taehyun like this, eyes alight and livid as he stops you from closing the door, slipping inside and slamming it behind him, taking in the way you only take a step back and yell at him to get out, “You need to start controlling that little temper of yours, cause you’ve really been getting on my nerves recently.”
“Oh really?” you laugh out, incredulous as you take a step toward him, pushing his chest roughly and forcing him to stumble back against the door, “Because you’ve been a total fucking angel, haven’t you? All pretty and proper, such a good boy, right?”
“Not my fault you’re such a wound-up bitch that doesn’t know how to take a joke and have fun,” he spits out, unfazed by the way you corner him and send him a nasty glare, refusing to back down even though you seem like you’ll get physical any second now.
“Take a joke? Have fun?” you seethe, poking his chest as you speak, “Everything that comes out of your mouth is a pathetic attempt at low blow disguised as a joke. So forgive me if I don’t find you funny.”
For once, Taehyun doesn’t know what to say— all he’s able to think of is the way you’ve practically pressed him against the door with your own body, the way his chest dully aches from the way you’ve been poking at him, and the way your own is heaving slightly from how angry you are, lips parted and eyes blown out with rage as they flicker up to take in his expression. 
A moment passes; then, your lips are on his, and his hands are on your waist, jerking you forward and forcing you to close any space left.
What possessed you to do this? You’d rather not think about it, choosing instead to get lost in the feeling of Taehyun and push past the fact that it’s him, the man who likes to degrade others for fun— actually, you think you will think about it, digging your nails into his shoulders and taking in the way he groans slightly against your mouth— and you quickly take this opportunity to take the kiss further, tongue eager to taste him as his hold on you tightens slightly.
“Fuck,” he mumbles against your lips, feeling the way you refuse to part for longer than a second; he frowns, a hand going up to grab at your hair before he’s tugging at it— using it as leverage to pull you away from him, watching the way your head slowly tilts back before your eyes are fluttering open, looking at him with such anger he can’t hold back his breathy laugh. 
“I can’t believe you, you…” he mutters out, and you can already tell he’s about to say something that will morbidly sober your clouded mind. 
“Shut up and put those lips to use,” you sigh, fingers tangling in the nape of his hair before you’re tugging him back toward you— you’re holding back a smile at the way your hands smooth over his shirt, the material slightly damp under your skin and his hair pushed back from how much he ran his hands through it.
Besides the fact that your hand is currently undoing Taehyun’s zipper and his lips have begun to suck and bite at your neck, nothing has really changed; you can still hear him cursing you under his breath, feeling the way he lets out a shaky sigh the moment your hand wraps around his length— teasingly stroking him, making sure to lead him on but not give him enough.   
It’s all a game of cat and mouse, judging by the way he’s just as eager to try and pull sounds out of you. Though, when he sees his current efforts aren’t working, he decides to take a different approach.
One thing you’ll never be able to deny about Taehyun is that he’s strong; he’s proving himself now, pushing you back and making you sit on the sink counter with ease— his hands are rough as he pulls up your dress, sloppy kisses still being laid out across your neck as he huffs slightly at your wandering hands; pulling away before he’s stepping back, slipping his belt off with ease and restraining your wrists with them— quietly, you muse about him being oddly skilled at it, but you’re quickly quieted by the way he tugs at the belt again, tightening the item around your wrists and listening to the way you whine at the feeling.
“Such a smart mouth,” he mumbles, pulling his cock out as he takes a look at you, eyes drinking in your dazed eyes and fucked out appearance with delight, “Too bad you’re too dumb to know when to shut up.”
He’s grabbing your waist before he’s tugging you forward— you slide slightly across the counter, legs spread open as Taehyun stands in between, feeling the way one of them hooks around his waist before you’re tugging him in closer, eyes challenging as you raise a brow impatiently. 
“Don’t give me that look,” he scoffs, allowing his tip to run teasingly along your slit, feeling the way your walls flutter around him in response, “Or I’ll leave you here and make you wish you begged for me while you had the chance.”
“Oh really?” you tilt your head, tugging him closer and feeling the way his tip breaches your entrance for a moment— your breath hitches, and though Taehyun pretends to remain unaffected, you can feel his cock twitch with anticipation. “I’m sure you’re all talk.”
This, Taehyun decides, is about as far as allow you to continue to provoke him; he’s pushing into you with one swift motion, watching the way your voice breaks and your mouth falls open at the feeling of him inside you, thick and warm and full as you clench around him, your pussy already wet from the way he simply couldn’t take his hands off you earlier; you hope he doesn’t notice it, but the way his lips quirk to form his usual arrogant smile definitely isn’t a good thing. 
Taehyun doesn’t give you a chance to adjust. He doesn’t take it slow, doesn’t ask you what feels good or what you like— he simply gauges your reaction and begins to fuck you, grinning at the way you whimper and whine that it feels good, throwing your head back and giving him access to mark your neck and collarbones, making sure to leave enough that you’ll remember this for a long time— after a moment, you realize what he’s doing, cursing under your breath and pulling at your restraints as he simply responds by sinking his teeth into the delicate flesh.
“Gonna make sure you remember this. Make people ask who you got these from,” he whispers, laughing mockingly at the way you whisper out a fuck you, retaliating by sucking harshly right at your jaw, just under your ear, “Feels good? Like knowing it’s me making you feel like this?”
You can barely process what he’s telling you; not when he’s grinding into you so good, his breaths heavy against your skin as he leans back up to kiss you once more— it’s a mess of tongue and teeth as you both fight to remain on top, the only thing you can still have control over as you sink your teeth into his lip meanly; he only reciprocates by fucking you harder, a hand reaching down to rub at your clit as he smiles against your lips, trying to keep control with the way you clench around him.
You’ve realized reluctantly that Taehyun is not all talk— he’s found the spot that has your body tensing and your sounds becoming louder, undoubtedly beginning to filter out the bathroom as Taehyun slaps a hand over your mouth; sending you a harsh glare, his brows furrowing at the way you tighten around him and your mouth falls slack against his palm.
“Be fucking quiet,” he hisses, letting out a hitched breath at the way you only buck your hips in response, your leg locking around his waist and bringing him impossibly close as you look up at him, your eyes dazed and glossy as you feel the way his cock twitches inside you at the sight— his pace picks up, and Taehyun can feel his high approaching, swollen lip bitten at and stuck between his teeth as he takes in the way you squirm under him, tears swelling at your waterline as you whine and moan against the palm of your hand.
Taehyun is the first to unravel; filling you to the brim, the feeling of his warm cum and thick cock that continues to rut into you enough to have you following soon after, chest arching toward him from the way he leans down in a sudden attempt to muffle his sounds, cruel mouth biting at the junction between your neck and shoulder as you merely curse at him in your mind. 
He doesn’t pull out— if anything, he’s still fucking you slowly long after, a slow pace as he mumbles something about keeping you filled; you don’t even have the energy to roll your eyes, resting your head against his own that is still buried in the crook of your neck, attempting poorly to catch your breath. After a moment, the reality of everything seems to set in, and your wrists ache.
“If you tell anyone about this, you’re dead.”
He huffs in amusement. 
“This is embarrassing for me too, you know,” he mumbles, turning his head so you can feel the way he noses along the column of your neck, sighing slowly before he says, “But I wouldn’t be against it happening again. You know, just to put you in your place.”
The moment Taehyun takes this stupid belt off you, you’ll show him what it means to be put in place. 
But for now, you’ll settle with the feeling of his cock still inside you and his arms wrapped around your waist. (For another thirty seconds, it’s been long enough and you’re sure there are others waiting outside by now.)
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heerinnie · 1 month
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𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬
𝐏.𝐉𝐒
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SYNOPSIS: Long term lovers, long term friends. Nothing and no one could come in between you and Jay other than your fear of intimacy.
WARNINGS: tooth-rotting fluff and smut, bf!jay x inexperienced fem!reader, reader has a fear of intimacy, implied s/a (not graphic), soft!Jay (he’s so sweet in this I cried a little when writing, making out, dry humping, mentions of oral (f!), Jay’s experienced but his body count’s like 2, blasphemy, written with the song Training Wheels by Melanie Martinez in mind
A/N: This is very very self-indulgent, writing is a way i cope with my experience in these situations so I feel like I healed a little part of me by acknowledging it happened and it wasn’t my fault, instead I’m turning it into something comforting. This works for me and for some others however i recognise that it may be triggering for others even if there aren’t any graphic mentions of s/a only the aftermath, please only read this if you’re in the right headspace. Any disrespectful comment will be deleted and blocked from my account 🤍
WC: 1274
^^ NSFW UNDER CUT, MINORS DNI (not proofread)
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It all happened so quickly and yet you were still stuck here, still scarred 2 almost 3 years in the past. Time doesn’t heal wounds, physical ones? Yes but this feeling you could never shake off even if you tried your hardest, you couldn’t heal especially not alone.
You weren’t the an overly religious person, definitely not after your trust was broken. If there was a god well they’re a dick, if god was real why did you get hurt? You didn’t do anything wrong you were so kind…so bright until a shadow blew your flame away and forced you to live in a chamber of your own inner darkness. It was not your fault, you didn’t do anything you were just there...
That flame grew smaller and smaller until it suddenly disappeared and all that was left was a trail of smoke showing that at some point in time you were burning and warming everyone’s hearts whilst yours was barley flickering trying so hard to stay alight.
So many things changed with Jay's re-entry into your life, everything seemed to change directions and you felt like there was a purpose for your existence. Despite the lingering pain and heartache thats been consuming you, his presence felt like a much needed breath of fresh air. It was as if he had come to you as a guardian angel pulling you out of the misery you were dwelling in. He gave you the comfort that you didn't even know you needed until he appeared. The one which eased the damages of your heart.
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“I think I'm ready” You've told him this so many times that you're starting to feel guilty for giving him this false hope. You know you've pulled back on your words before, so you understand why he may be sceptical. However, this time is different. You've taken the time to reflect on your feelings and you're sure that you're finally ready. You want to show Jay that you're committed and prepared to take the next step in your intimacy and you're willing to put in the effort to make it happen.
He obviously had some doubts however, he took the time to affirm that you were genuinely ready and that you wouldn't have any regrets. He's always so patient and understanding which is not surprising considering that he has always been your best friend before he even had the privilege of calling himself your boyfriend. Someone who understands you better than anyone else, your soulmate in all and every way.
Your relationship with him is built on trust, understanding and respect and it was so scary, you've never been treated so well before Jay and it showed but he was patient with the time it took time to get used him.
“I’m 100% sure” you got up and sat on his lap. You were fine and it felt right, this time you were in control of the situation and you weren’t uncomfortable with the feeling of sitting crotch to crotch with your boyfriend.
It felt like there was a force pulling your lips toward his as you leaned in to connect with each other and in an instant, you felt a rush of intense emotions overwhelm you. Your pupils dilated and your heartbeat quickened as it was trying to catch up with the sudden flood of feelings. It was a moment of pure realization- this was what true love felt like, and now you knew it with absolute confidence.
You weren't Jay’s first but at this moment he felt like you were, he had like two quick fucks with past short term girlfriends but this time it felt different. His heart was running laps and it was like all the air in his lungs disappeared as soon as your plush lips met his. He mentally cursed himself for growing hard already but in his defence, he had the most beautiful girl on his lap making out with him and as much as it made him nervous he couldn't help but get aroused when you started slowly grinding on his bulge to set the mood.
Your lungs were beginning to burn from the lack of oxygen as the room was filled with loud and wet noises of lips smacking, what started off as a passionate slow kiss quickly turned into a deeply heated make out session. Tongues dancing in an animalistic rhythm, hands travelling anywhere they could- you finally unlocked another level of intimacy with your boyfriend.
As you reflect on the situation you're in right now you can't help but feel an overwhelming sense of joy and gratitude. You think back to all the moments you've shared together, from the first time you met to the night you opened up to him about your trauma. The thought that someone like Jay could choose to be with you fills you with so much happiness and you can't help but break into a fit of giggles at the sheer joy of it all. It's a feeling that's difficult to describe, but you know that you're grateful for every moment you get to spend with him.
Your hips moved faster as a result of the friction you felt, you moaned when it sent shocks of pleasure straight to your core and down your spine. When you adjusted to a better angle jays grip on your hips tightened, he let out a soft moan that sounded like music to your ears. You felt his soft palm touch your cheek signalling to look at him and once your eyes met he couldn’t control his body as he started thrusting in his hips into you.
Nearing closer and closer to your climax your head starting spinning when Jay let out moans and groans whereas you couldn’t keep even the smallest noises of pleasure within yourself, you noticed a tiny bead of sweat forming at the top of his sun-kissed skin. It was already a hot day but the way he was thrusting and you were grinding felt like the heating went up covering you in sweat. As you watched his face contort with pleasure you couldn't help but think that you had never seen a man this beautiful, both inside and out. His broad shoulders flexed to keep up with the movement of his hips and placement of his hands on your stuttering body, his chiseled features were accentuated by the dimmed living room light highlighting the sweat that trickled down his face. Despite the heat, he remained focused, determined to give you the best he could at the moment trying to leaving a lasting impression to say that sex isn’t as scary when it’s with the love of your life and you couldn't help but admire him for wanting to give you it all.
With all that work you finally felt your orgasm hit with jay’s quickly following after. You stayed laying on him ignoring the uncomfortable wetness on your panties as your blown out pupils stared off onto the empty space on the couch next to where you two rested,
“That felt amazing” you hummed agreeing with your boyfriend, “but if you’re up for it I can show you how good it can really feel” he purred, you felt his cock hardening again with the way you were spread out on him. In a span of seconds you two ran towards your shared bedroom preparing for a long night of what pleasure with your loved one really feels like starting off strong with jay devouring your pussy for the first time as an apology for the lack of dirty talk and foreplay he didn’t do before.
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A/N: I’m not really happy with the ‘smut’ I rushed it and I think you can tell 😭 I haven’t posted in forever so this is a little filler for my hee fic that’s like 3/4 done (currently like 4K words idk 🤷🏽‍♀️) but I hope you guys enjoyed this little treat <3
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Dirty Work 6
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Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as bullying, familial discord/abuse, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You start a new gig and find one of your clients to be hard to please.
Characters: Loki
Note: I had the worst Monday that could have ever existed. Onto Tuesday.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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"I trust this should be amenable to your work," Mr. Laufeyson holds open the door along the east wall of his study. One you've never opened before though you're familiar with the space within. The library also opens into the hallway and keeps you busier than many of the other rooms. "When you should require it. I expect much of your work will keep you afoot."
You peer past him, his tall figure like a second shadow. You clutch your kit tight and nod. You didn't exactly bring the tools for this new role.
"I should have a blank ledger somewhere, oh and a pen of course," he advises, "given our new... arrangement, I would require a contact point."
You nod and tear your attention from the full shelves and luxurious velvet chaise. You won't get to enjoy those but they give the space a much more welcome feel than the rest of the house. You face Mr. Laufeyson as he keeps the door propped open with his foot. He slides out his phone as if it's a task. 
"Never to worry, I wouldn't bother you much so long as you do your work adequately," he assures, "but in case of... emergency."
"Oh, erm," you sputter and reach into your hoodie pocket, revealing the tiny flip phone.
"Hm, vintage," he muses, "as you would."
He holds his phone, gesturing to it with his other hand. You teethe your lip before you recall the digits of your number. Your plan doesn't include a lot of talk minutes but he doesn't promise much of that. He keys them into his screen.
"You'll have mine," he taps his thumb and your phone chimes. "In case."
"Thanks, uh, Mr. Laufeyson."
"Mmmm," he hums again. "Suppose you would need some sort of proper device, a computer of sorts." He clucks and checks his watch, dropping his arm with a huff, "I've an important event shortly, I'll try to venture by the electronics shop before I return.”
You nod and fold your phone, slipping it away as you peek back into the library. He inhales deeply, "suppose you should begin. The list is on the writing desk.”
You accept the command easily. You’re even thankful for it. It gives you a proper reason to find distance. You go to the desk and look over the typed list. You don’t sit, hesitating as you wonder if it would seem lazy, maybe even presumptuous.
“Let me fetch that ledger,” he says before letting the door drift closed.
You run your finger over the top line. ‘Create a schedule’. Hmmm. You look over the bullets that fill the paper. You can only assume he refers to all of that. It’s straightforward, you can handle a schedule. It’s everything that comes after that gives you doubt.
“And you’ll have to review what my wife, ex that is, left in shambles,” Mr. Laufeyson interrupts as he pushes through again. “Her little folder is here. She was always fond of order, even though she left me in much less. This is what’s left of her handiwork,” he approaches coolly and sets down a plain fawn coloured ledger, a fountain pen, and a white folder with golden flowers on it.
“Thanks,” you eke out as his hands linger on the edges.
You sense his gaze, discerning and weighty. He leans forward slightly and you nearly take a step across as he points to the list. You follow the line of his arm and his extended finger.
“Another point to add, ‘acquire work attire’,” he instructs and turns his hand over, flippant flicking his finger in a gesture to your plain hoodie and worn gray denim. “I trust my pay should afford that necessity easily, however should you require a write-off, I suppose it could be argued as a professional expense.”
“Sorry, Mr. Laufeyson,” you frown in embarrassment, “I didn’t…” You look down at yourself, wanting to hide behind your arms. 
“You wouldn’t think of it, just a maid,” he dismisses, “very well, I think you have more than enough to begin. I should be some hours.”
“Yes, Mr. Laufeyson,” you agree. He is correct, there is more than enough to keep you busy.
“I will review the schedule upon my return,” he affirms. “Should you require refreshment, you recall where to go.”
You nod and cautiously reach for the ledger, sliding it closer as he backs up. You slowly sit, hovering before you let yourself rest. He lingers by the door as you roll the pen aside and put the ledger and folder parallel. You open the former and line up the list inside the cover, resuming your perusal of the bullet points.
The door closes and you keep your attention to the paper. You don’t dare a glance up until you hear his muffled footfalls cross his study. You feel as if he’s waiting for you to make a mistake. You think you might be too.
🧹
A clunk sharply pierces the tenuous peace of the empty house. You hadn’t heard the door or his approach, not even right next door, not until the hefty thunk. You listen but keep your nose down. 
You’re just about done with the schedule. Two cleans throughout the week to spread the duties evenly. The main floor on Mondays, and the upper on Thursday. You’ll be able to fit in an unexpected tidying between your other to-dos.
You flutter through the pretty white and gold folder. The embossed suede speaks of a sophisticated owner. You wonder why she would ever abandon it, though you assume, a separation may not inspire sentiment.
You turn over another note. This one about the gazebo. A blurb on a repair. You’ll have too go out and check to see if it was actually done, there’s no confirmation of the job. You stop to admire her loopy writing, as elegant as the folder.
The door opens without pretense. You sit up and wiggle the pen between your index and thumb. Mr. Laufeyson as a flat white box in his hand, along with a smaller one on top. He does not near you, instead place his lot on the square table by the window.
“Here,” he orders shortly.
You rise and leave the pen in the centre of the ledger. You cross to him as he moves the smaller box aside and unfolds the two smaller flaps from the large one. You can’t help but watch curiously.
“This should suffice,” he shimmies out the cardboard insert, revealing a sleek silver laptop, “hmm?”
He shifts it towards you and lets you look it over. You put your hands behind you to keep from touching. You lean in just a little.
“It looks nice, Mr. Laufeyson. Thank you.”
“For your work, of course. These days, it is a requirement. And this,” he takes the smaller box and offers it up, “a proper work phone. It is more professional. Any calls on my behalf, you will make on this. That relic you have won’t do much.”
“Uh, yes, Mr. Laufeyson, that’s really thoughtful.”
“Thoughtful? Practical. Company property, of course,” he insists, “another point to add. Set these up. They should be functioning by the end of the day. You’ll need them to keep up with the rest of your tasks.”
“Yes, Mr. Laufeyson. I will put it on the list.”
“Mm,” he circles around you, striding to the writing desk before you can react. You follow at a few paces, not wanting to crowd him. He takes the pen and uncaps it. He adds the bullet himself. “There you are.”
“Thank you, Mr. Laufeyson,” you recite again.
He snaps the lid on the pen and his lips twitch, not quite curving, “I’ll review,” he snatches up the open ledger, your schedule open to see. You almost rush forward. You meant to rewrite it before you handed it over. It has scribbles all over it. You won’t argue.
“Go on,” he steps around the desk, waving to the side dismissively.
You return to the table and gather the laptop and phone, along with the stray box. You bring them back to the writing desk and stay standing as you free the laptop from the insert. You let your eyes edge along the top of your vision as Mr. Laufeyson sits on the chaise and browses the ledger.
You refocus and investigate the cord buried in the box as a collection of booklets fall out. You sort through them and find the one in English. You start on the front page, reading over the different buttons and features. The diagram is especially helpful. You’ve never had a computer before, not that it belongs to you.
You squint as you read the precautions. Your mind flits back and forth between your current task and everything beyond. You would go to the library sometimes and spend an hour on the PC, and in school you did all your work in the resource room. This is much fancier than any of the boxy computers you’d used before.
It says you should plug it in and charge to full before booting. You unravel the cord and search for an outlet against the wall. There’s one not far. You hook up the cord to the port on the side of the slender laptop then trail it to the wall. The little light on the side glows yellow.
Then you take the little box. A phone. The flip phone was second-hand but this is shiny and new. You’re like a kid at Christmas, not that you got much for the holiday, even when you were younger.
You slide out the small device. Your hand is unused to it. It’s not clunky like your phone. It feels easy to drop even if it’s bigger than the flip. You peel off the plastic film around the border and across the screen.
You take out the booklet and read it as closely as the first. Same thing; charge before use. You don’t want to mess up any of this. You plug it in above the computer and place it on the closed lid. You carefully sit in the chair, careful not to jostle the cords.
You peek up and find Mr. Laufeyson looking at you over the top of the ledger. His green eyes gleam and flick back down to the page. You hope he doesn’t see how clueless you are. This stuff that’s all so normal to everyone else is new to you. A job alone is a novelty still.
“You may ask it,” he says abruptly.
You wince and shrug. You don’t know what he means. His brows tweak in amusement.
“You’ve not asked about time off. I am unaware of your previous commitment, what days you had to yourself.”
You didn’t think of it but he does seem to think of everything. You twiddle your fingers on the desk. You would work as much as you need to. You still haven’t seen the final hospital bill.
“Mr. Laufeyson, I worked three shifts per week, but I was on probation,” you explain carefully, “I can work more than that.”
“How much is more?” He wonders, his thumb tapping the corner of the ledger.
You blink. You don’t know what’s appropriate. You don’t want to say too little and come off lazy, or say too much and seem ignorant. 
“Six?” You utter, “six days, Mr. Laufeyson?”
His thumb stills, “per week?”
You nod. His eyes narrow and his lips thin in consideration.
“Should do,” he accepts and his eyes fall back to the page.
You think you got the right answer. You look down at the bullet points. It seems like a lot written out but surely it can’t be. Besides, the more you think about it, the more exciting it is. This house is so beautiful and this list means you get to explore it.
You don’t sink too deep into the moment of optimism. Mr. Laufeyson stands, still intent on the ledger. He paces blindly around the library, a click of his tongue as he reviews your handwriting.
“There will be some nights,” he intones, “other occasions where I require you in the evening.”
“Mr. Laufeyson,” you accept as you flutter the pages of the laptop instruction booklet.
“Mm,” he hums flatly, “I do think the cook liked you, didn’t she? Suppose we might retain that service for the time being.”
You nod and make a note in the corner of the list; simply, Corissa. He shuts the ledger and grips it tight. He walks around the table then turns back, coming back to you. He lays down the book on the desk.
“I won’t know until the day in question. You understand, this would be on-call. I’ve a busy life and so will you,” he girds, leaning on the book as he bends over the desk. “You will be doing more than watching little birds flapping around the garden.”
You nearly recoil as he plucks the memory out so precisely. That was careless of you. You should’ve kept your head down and just got to work. It’s a warning you’ll remember.
“I won’t, Mr. Laufeyson, I understand,” you assure.
“Not to say that you can’t,” he stands and pushes the bottom of his jacket back, hooking his thumbs in his pockets, “but only when there are no other pressing matters.”
“Yes, Mr. Laufeyson.”
He sighs and tilts his head back, “you must resist distractions. You are prone to it. I’ve noticed.”
You chew your lip and accept the remonstrance. You’ll take it instead as advice. He is right, you do find yourself bewitched by this place at times.
“Like that man,” he says staunchly, “don’t think I forgot. I will warn you, he is my brother… regrettably. He is well above the staff and he knows it.”
You take the hint. It’s improper of you to stare. Even if he had touched you. Or maybe, you misinterpreted an accident.
“Yes, Mr. Laufeyson.”
“Hear me when I tell you, he is not interested in the likes of you,” he sniffs, “with any luck, he won’t be much around for you to believe anything of the like.”
You nod and pick up the pen, nervously rolling it between your fingers. His reproach scalds your cheek. To think he assumes you would ever think of something like that. That you might encourage a stranger in that way.
He watches you for a moment before he spins away. He checks the time on his wrist as you reach for the ledger.
“Very well, I must be at my own work,” he declares, “as I trust you will be diligent in your own.”
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Let’s Give ‘Em Something to Talk About
Pairing: Eddie Munson x Femme!Henderson!Reader
Summary: Y/N Henderson’s relationship with Eddie puts her at odds with Jason Carver and co.
Warnings: Reader uses she/her pronouns, bullying/harassment, slut shaming, allusions to sexual content (nothing sexual actually happens), Jason being a prick, swearing, Reader is Dustin’s sister but no physical descriptions are used and you can read it as an adopted sibling if you want, I think that’s it but let me know if I missed something
A/N: Alright, this is the first Fic I’ve ever posted on here. I’m honestly a little nervous, but hopefully you enjoy. I’ll probably end up posting this on my Ao3 too so I’ll link that at some point.
My Master List | Ao3
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“I’m gonna miss you”, Eddie whines as he leans against the locker next to yours.
“It’s one class”, you reply as you swap out your English textbook for history, “that’s, what, an hour?”
“Actually I have Davis’s class next so it feels more like three hours”, Eddie says.
You snort. Mr. Davis has probably been around since the dinosaur era, and if there were to be a competition for most boring teacher at Hawkins High, he would win it hands down.
“It’s not funny”, Eddie teasingly pouts, “I might actually die of boredom.”
“As much as I would hate for that to happen, I’ve got my own class to get to, so unfortunately you’re on your own for now,” you reply.
“Alright well, please tell the rest of Hellfire I’m going to miss them”, he tells you, “and feel free to wear that black skirt of yours to the funeral. The tight one. It’s what I would’ve wanted.”
You roll your eyes affectionately before pressing a quick kiss to his lips.
“You’re so dramatic”, you say, “I’ll see you later.”
“If I survive that long”, he calls. You shake your head before turning the corner and heading into your history classroom.
“Okay, class”, your teacher, Mr. Price announces once the bell rings, “I’ve written some questions on the board. You’ll find the answers in Chapter 5 of your textbook. Write them down and turn them in by the end of class. You may work with a partner if you’d like.”
You pull your textbook out of your bag and flip to a clean sheet in your notebook. You don’t have any friends in this class, so you figure you may as well just do it yourself and get it over with. That is, until a voice startles you as you’re about to start reading the first page of the chapter.
“Hey, Y/N. Do you wanna work together?”
You blink up at the source of the voice and are pretty sure you must be hallucinating. That’s the only explanation you can think of as to why Jason Carver would be asking you to be his partner.
The two of you have been in the same grade since Kindergarten and you can't think of a single time in all those years that he’s directly acknowledged your existence. The closest thing you have to a connection with him is that your little brother is friends with one of his new Basketball recruits, but you kind of doubt he even knows or cares about that. There’s a few members of his little posse he could be asking to work with him, so you have no clue why he’d be asking you of all people. But, you don’t have anyone else, so you shrug.
“Sure, I guess”, you say.
“Great”, he smiles, moving to sit down next to you.
“I’ll get started on number 1”, you suggest, “maybe you can do number 2 and we’ll compare?”
“Sure”, he says sweetly. You’re honestly getting a little freaked out by how friendly he’s being.
You both do your agreed upon work, and then switch off to show each other your answers.
“So?” you ask when he’s finished reading yours, “does that seem right?”
“Yeah”, he replies, “you’re good at this. You ever thought about being a tutor?”
“Oh, no, not really”, you say.
“See, I just ask because our youth group has this program where some of us older members help the younger kids out after school and stuff.”
“Oh, that’s cool”, you tell him, not really engaged the conversation. It all sounds well and good, but you really aren’t interested in being a tutor at the moment.
“You know, the church has a lot of great programs”, Jason continues, and you’re not sure what any of this has to do with the Byzantine empire, which is what you’re supposed to be discussing.
“Okay”, you say.
“They do a lot of outreach, a lot of stuff to help people who have lost their way.”
“Lost their way?” you inquire, a small part of you beginning to understand what’s actually going on.
“Yeah. You know. Made bad choices, got mixed up with the wrong people.”
“Um, I think we should just get back to the assignment”, you suggest, uncomfortable with the discussion and not wanting it to go any further.
“Look”, Jason sighs, “what I’m trying to say is, I don’t know you very well, but you seem like a nice girl. I’d hate to see you go down a bad path.”
Okay. You get it now, and it’s starting to piss you off.
“Thank you, but I’m doing just fine”, you insist.
“You’ve been hanging around with Eddie Munson”, Jason says, as if it’s some scandalous secret and not just you spending time with your boyfriend, “you really shouldn’t do that, you know…”
You stare at him, a little dumbfounded he would just up and say such a thing to you.
“You can’t be serious…”, you say.
Jason leans in to you, a deadly serious expression on his face.
“I’ve heard about guys like him before”, he tells you, “I know the stuff they’re into.”
Yeah, so do you. It’s tabletop role playing games, which is about the least nefarious activity you could possibly think of. Jason clearly doesn’t see it that way, though, because he’s still going on.
“And I know they like to lure innocent people like you into their little organizations. I’m telling you, Munson is bad news. You should stay away before you get hurt.”
You seriously have to hold yourself back from laughing right in Jason’s face. You’re not sure what reality he’s living in, but it clearly isn’t the same one you are. Last weekend, you and Eddie had watched Terms of Endearment and he’d started to cry (well started tearing up at least, even sniffled a little, though he vehemently denied it). There’s not a single situation in which you can ever imagine him causing you intentional harm.
“Okay, you know what”, you say, “I think I’m gonna finish the rest of the assignment alone, thanks.”
Jason grabs your arm gently but firmly. “I’m serious, Y/N. He’s dangerous. Stay away from him before you end up hurt or killed.”
You’re really not sure what the most offensive part of all this is. It’s either that Jason thinks that somehow Eddie Munson, your lovable dork of a boyfriend,is secretly an evil Satanist cult leader, or that you’re apparently too stupid or naive to make that kind of judgment for yourself. Maybe it’s that he volunteered to work with you on an assignment and acted all friendly with you just so he could get this opportunity to preach to you about your supposedly “dangerous” lifestyle. He’s never given you the time of day before, after all.
“I don’t know what it is you think you see in him, but I promise you it’s not going to end well.”
You snort. Is he, what, jealous or something? He’s got a girlfriend, after all, and plenty of other girls who’d be willing to take her place if she were to leave him. It’s kind of sad that he’s apparently so insecure that the mere thought of Eddie Munson getting female attention is enough to have him losing his shit like this.
“Whatever”, you spit, “just leave me alone.”
He glares at you, but ultimately turns his attention to his textbook and doesn’t speak to you for the rest of the class.
-
You happily shove the encounter out of your mind once the bell rings. You’re perfectly content with the social circle you keep, and you’re not going to let some jock with an inflated sense of self importance change that.
Jason apparently doesn’t do the same because he spends lunch glaring at you from his table. Granted, him shooting disgusted looks in the general direction of the Hellfire Club is a regular occurance, but today he’s making it obvious his ire is directed specifically at you.
“What the fuck is his problem?” Eddie asks.
“I dunno”, you shrug, “he’s just an asshole.”
Eddie peers at him for a moment and you can see a familiar glint of mischief twinkle in his eye. Before you can comment, he’s dramatically pushing himself to his feet and sauntering over to Jason and company.
“What do you want?” Jason demands.
“Couldn’t help but notice you staring”, Eddie says, “just wanted to let you know that I’m flattered, but unfortunately you aren’t really my type. Sorry.”
“Fuck off”, Jason barks, “disgusting freak.”
“Don’t take it too hard”, Eddie says, giving him a joking pat on the shoulder before making his way back over to you. You stifle a laugh at the indignant look plastered on Jason’s face. Eddie shoots you a proud grin and you shake your head affectionately. Jason clearly doesn’t know shit about “guys like Eddie.”
-
The next few days pass by uneventfully. Jason doesn’t try talking to you again, which you’re thankful for. Wednesday starts out normally, you go to history, and Jason roundly ignores your presence. Then you have to go to your next class, which is gym.
Definitely not a favorite of yours, and you don’t even have Eddie in your class to ease the pain. You make it through your warm ups, and then the coach has you split up to practice your volleyball serves. Everything’s going well until Andy, one of Jason’s buddies, approaches you out of nowhere.
“Hey, Henderson”, he says, a smirk on his face, “you think you could score me some weed?”
You look at him, confused. You don’t get involved in Eddie’s side hustle, so you’re not sure why he’d ask you.
“What?”
“Oh, I just figured you probably get a good discount”, he goes on, “I mean, that’s why you let Munson fuck you, right?”
You freeze in shock, your cheeks starting to grow hot. You can’t say you’re used to people making comments about your sex life, especially not to your face.
“I mean, I gotta say”, Andy continues, a cruel glint in his eye, “I didn’t take you for a slut. But come on. Spreading your legs for that freak? Jesus, that’s sad. You know, I’d be happy to show you a good time, since you’re so desperate for it.”
You can only stand there, mouth agape. Sure, you’ve gotten a gross comment or two from a male classmate before, but nothing like this. You certainly have never been called a slut before. You try to formulate a response, but you can’t come up with one. It doesn’t matter anyway, because the coach’s whistle rings out, signaling for you all to hit the changing rooms. You dash out of the gym, more than pleased to be away from Andy.
You hop in the shower in the locker room, take a few moments to shake off the discomfort of the interaction. You’re not entirely successful in that endeavor, because it keeps playing in your mind even after you’re dressed and making your way back into the hallways.
You have no idea where the hell Andy came up with all of that. At this point, it’s common knowledge that you and Eddie are dating, but you don’t know where this idea that you’re sleeping with him for drugs came from. It couldn’t be further from the truth.
“Hey, Beautiful”, you’re distracted from your thoughts by Eddie, who comes happily bounding over to you. His face falls when he sees the look on your face though.
“You okay?” he asks.
“I’m fine”, you say. Something about the idea of telling Eddie about what happened leaves a bad taste in your mouth. It’s embarrassing, and you definitely don’t want him to feel like it’s somehow his fault that Jason and Andy are giving you a hard time.
Besides, it doesn’t matter. Once again, nothing they say about you or Eddie is true. You can’t let some stupid jocks get to you.
-
Honestly, you probably could’ve been okay, if that was the end of it. Unfortunately, things only get worse the next day.
As you make your way to your seat in history, you catch sight of Amber and Samantha, two cheerleaders who like to hang around Jason and the others, whispering as you walk by.
You ignore them, figuring you’re being paranoid and they probably aren’t even talking about you, but when you sit down, Amber turns and looks you right in the eye.
She raises her voice then, clearly intending for you to hear what she’s saying.
“I hope she’s gotten tested”, she tells Samantha, “I can’t imagine what nasty shit the Freak is passing on to her.”
You take a deep breath, turning away from her.
It doesn’t matter, you tell yourself, it’s not true.
“I hope the drugs are worth it,” Samantha says.
You clench your jaw as you slip into your seat. It shouldn’t bother you so much. It's not true, and even if it were, who cares what Amber and Samantha have to say about it?
You’re dating Eddie because you like him. You like the way he’s always joking around and making you laugh, you like that he makes a point of looking out for Dustin and his friends, you like the way he looks at you with those big puppy dog eyes and flashes that mischievous grin. Cheap access to his drugs has never even crossed your mind.
You shouldn’t concern yourself with what they say, you know that, but hearing your name in connection with “slut” grinds at you.
-
During gym class, you do your best to avoid Andy, because everytime he notices you looking at him, he’s making some suggestive gesture at you. You don’t bother telling anyone about it, since Andy’s on the basketball team and the coach would probably take his side.
In the hallway, you accidentally bump into Patrick from the basketball team. You mutter an apology, which he accepts, but his girlfriend gives you the dirtiest look you’ve ever seen.
“Don’t talk to her”, you hear her tell him as you walk away, “she’s a slut.”
-
All of the gossip has put you in a foul mood by the time you get to your second to last period of the day, which happens to be study hall.
Like always, it’s in the cafeteria, with you and a bunch of other students of varying grade levels all sitting around doing your homework. Technically, you’re not supposed to talk, but the teacher in charge is way too underpaid to worry about enforcing that, so you can usually get away with conversation as long as things don’t get too rowdy.
You’re not taking advantage of that today, rather trying your best to distract yourself by actually doing your homework. You’re halfway through summarizing Act 3 of Hamlet when you hear someone say your name.
“Hey, Y/N…”
You’re confused when you look up to find Lucas standing there. Technically, you’ve known him for years, but it’s not like you’ve ever associated with him outside the time he spends with Dustin.
“What?” you ask, a little meaner than you mean to.
“I just thought you should know that…well, I think Jason has been going around saying things about you.”
Of course. You should’ve known Jason was behind this. Jason fucking Carver. Captain of the Basketball Team. Active member of the local church. Son of one of the most respected families in Hawkins. He’s clearly used to people listening to whatever he has to say. Apparently, his ego couldn’t handle you dismissing his comments about your relationship with Eddie.
Jesus, you’d always known he was a bit of an asshole, but this is a level of pettiness you’d never expected, even from him.
“Don’t tell him I told you”, Lucas adds, “but I just thought you should know.”
“Thank you”, you say. You’re definitely glad to have that piece of information.
-
The next day, you storm into Mr. Price’s classroom with righteous fury coursing through your veins. You bypass your desk and instead march straight up to Jason.
He pauses his conversation with Andy and Samantha when he sees you approach.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” You demand.
“Excuse me?” Jason asks.
“I know you’ve been starting rumors about me”, you tell him, “what exactly is your problem, Jason?”
“Me? I don’t have a problem”, Jason insists, “I just think it’s fair the men of Hawkins High get a warning about your ‘extracurricular’ activities.”
You can feel heat flood your cheeks.
“You’re a dick, Jason!” you hiss.
“You know, Y/N”, Jason retorts, “I actually feel bad for you. I mean, no decent man is ever going to want you when they find out you’ve been giving it up to some trailer trash freak.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about”, you snap.
“Believe me, I know exactly what happens to girls who hang around with filthy, Satan-worshiping scumbags”, he says, “and you know what? I’m not going to feel sorry for you when they’re finding your body dumped in the woods.”
“Get over yourself!”
“Whatever”, Jason shakes his head, “I’m not gonna take the attitude from some little slut.”
You’re not fully in control of yourself during what happens next. One second you’re standing there listening to Jason degrade you, the next your fist is connecting with his face.
He stands there, stunned for a moment, before opening his mouth to say something. He doesn’t get the chance though, because Mr. Price gets to it first.
“Ms. Henderson”, he gasps, “Mr. Carver, what on earth is going on here?”
“She punched me in the face”, Jason spits accusingly.
“I-I…I’m sorry I…”
“Enough”, Mr. Price sighs, “I want both of you going to the principal’s office right now!”
-
You’re in deep shit. That much is immediately clear. You punched Jason Carver in the face. It’s not like you even claim it was self defense, since he didn’t do anything physical to you.
“So”, Principal Higgins sighs, “tell me what happened again?”
“She punched me in the face”, Jason hisses.
“Is that true?”
“Yes”, you sigh, “but he called me a slut.”
Principal Higgins rubs his temple, processing the information. Meanwhile, Jason’s gaze is fixed firmly on you, his eyes full of hatred.
“Mr. Carver”, Higgins says finally, “that is not appropriate language to use in regards to another student. You may go back to class, but I better not hear about something like this again.”
Jason stands and marches out of the office, as if he has a right to be pissed about Higgins’ scolding. You suppress the urge to roll your eyes. Of course he gets a slap on the wrist. Nobody wants to punish the star basketball player. You’re certain that if it were anyone else, Eddie or Dustin or one of the other Hellfire Club members, they definitely wouldn’t be getting off so easily.
“Now, as for you Ms. Henderson”, Higgins says, “we do not allow for any sort of violence in this school. However, in all your years at this school, you have never had to receive any form of discipline. So I’m willing to be flexible here. Normally, something like this could be grounds for suspension, but since this is your first time, I say it’s two weeks detention after school starting next Monday. Does that sound fair to you?”
Not really, no, but you can’t say that.
“Yes”, you reply instead.
“Alright. Good. Now go back to class. And Ms. Henderson, I sincerely hope I won’t have to see you in my office again.”
-
You’re in a bad mood when Mr. Price’s class finally ends. You’ve gone your entire high school career without getting a detention and now you’ve ruined that over some pompous dick bag. Speaking of, Jason has been staring daggers at you since you returned to class, and is continuing to do so even now as you’re leaving.
There’s a tense, awkward moment where you both stand there in the hallway, glaring at each other, but it’s broken when the force of a body colliding with your back almost takes you off your feet. Jason is forgotten when a pair of arms wrap around your waist from behind.
“Eddie”, you huff playfully.
“How’d you know it was me?” he asks as you turn around to face him.
“Cause you can’t keep your hands to yourself, Munson”, you reply.
“Don’t blame me”, he replies, “you know I’m powerless to resist your charms.”
Before you can reply he’s pulling you close and beginning to press kisses to your cheek. You know the two of you are making a scene, and on any other day you might be a little self conscious about it, but today you’re just glad to have him around.
His kisses stop suddenly and you realize he’s stopped because he’s finally noticed Jason’s hateful glaring. Unfazed as always, he just flashes a cocky smile and gives Jason a mocking impression of a friendly wave. Jason makes a face like he’s wishing for both you and Eddie’s violent deaths.
“Geez”, Eddie comments, “he looks pissed.”
“Um, yeah, probably because I punched him in the face”, you mutter.
Eddie’s eyes widen in obvious surprise.
“He had it coming”, you add, “he was being a Dick.”
You know you don’t have to defend yourself to Eddie. He knows better than anyone how nasty Jason can be.
“My, my, Fair Lady Henderson”, he smiles, “I dare say that was very Metal of you.”
“Yeah, well, Higgins didn’t think so”, you reply, “I got two weeks detention for it.”
“Ol’ Higgins never did have a sense of humor”, Eddie says, “but from where I’m standing, you’re basically a hero.”
“Really?”
“Hell yeah”, Eddie tells you, “Jason and his goons have been making our lives miserable for years.”
You can’t help but smile at that. You’re definitely not happy with the day’s events, but knowing Eddie’s on your side makes it a little more bearable.
-
On Monday you begrudgingly make your way to Mrs. Cline’s room for your first day of detention.
“Ms. Henderson?” she asks when you walk in.
“Yeah”, you say, a little embarrassed.
“Wonderful”, she says, checking your name off of a list in front of her, “please take a seat.”
There’s only two other people in there with you, so you just pick a seat as far from them as possible and sit down.
“Alright”, Mrs. Cline says, “looks like everyone’s here except…”
“I’m here.”
You look up in surprise to see Eddie come walking into the room.
“Ah, yes, Mr. Munson”, Mrs. Cline says dryly, “what a surprise. Please take a seat.”
You know that Eddie isn’t a stranger to detention, but it’s weird that he didn’t mention anything to you when you’d told him about it. He walks over to the desk next to yours, looking way too pleased for someone who’s about to serve a stint in detention.
“What are you doing here?” you ask.
“Oh, you know, got caught vandalizing the boy’s locker room during free period”, he tells you.
“What? When?”
“Friday”, he says with a satisfied smirk.
You frown. This must’ve happened after the whole Jason thing on Friday which means…
Which means Eddie did it knowing that you were also going to be in detention.
“Eddie”, you say, “did you get detention just because I did?”
“I couldn’t let you have all the fun, could I?” he grins.
You can’t help but smile along with him.
“Mr. Munson, Ms. Henderson”, Mrs. Cline calls from her desk, “no talking during detention.”
Eddie mimes zipping his lips and waits until Mrs. Cline looks away before giving you a playful wink. You stifle a giggle.
You don’t know Jason all that well, but you’re pretty sure he would never dream of landing himself in detention just to keep his girlfriend company. You’ve never seen him make a scene in the middle of the hallways to get her to smile. That’s the thing about this that really gets under your skin. Jason and the others don’t know shit. They think that just because Eddie doesn’t fall into their narrow definition of “acceptable”, he must be scary and dangerous. They think that just because you’re not afraid of him, you must be dirty and corrupted. They’re too close-minded to look closer and see that Eddie is the sweetest boyfriend you could ever imagine, that you spend time with him because he makes you happy. They’d rather write him off as a freak and you off as a slut than accept that maybe their perception is wrong.
You’re far from being a violent person, but you can’t say you regret what you did. Jason deserved to be put in his place, and it’s not like you did any serious damage to him anyway. You’re glad you stood up for yourself, for Eddie. You’ve probably tacked “psycho bitch” onto your already unflattering “whore” reputation, but at this point, you’re not sure you care. If being a freak means you get to spend your days with the love of your life, you will gladly accept that label.
-
After the designated two hours are up, Mrs. Cline dismisses you all.
“Well, that wasn’t so bad”, you say as you and Eddie start making your way through the hall.
“Nah”, he replies, “I mean it’s boring but it’s not bad.”
“Don’t get me wrong, I’m definitely not planning on having to do this again”, you continue, “but it’s bearable.”
Eddie nods.
“I’m sorry, by the way”, he adds.
“For what?”
“Jason and the others. They’ve been giving you a hard time, right?”
“Yeah”, you shrug, “it is what it is. Not your fault.”
“I mean it kind of is”, Eddie replies, “they’re only doing it because you’re dating me.”
“Eddie”, you say, “Jason’s an asshole, okay? That’s not on you. If he can’t handle our relationship, then fuck him.”
That gets a grin out of Eddie.
“You know, you’re getting to be quite a rabble rouser, Henderson”, he jokes.
“I’m learning from the best”, you tease back.
Eddie’s smile widens. He follows you out to your car and then presses a soft kiss to your lips.
“See you tomorrow, Sweetheart”, he says and then heads off to his van. You watch him go, butterflies still lingering in your tummy from the contact.
If you’d actually had any doubts about Eddie, they would’ve disappeared in that moment. That feeling, it’s a one of a kind thing. No one’s ever managed to give it to you before, and you’re not sure anyone else ever will. You love Eddie. He loves you. He’s sweet, and silly and he treats you right. If your peers want to believe a bunch of bullshit about you two, then let them. You know what you have, and you’re not going to let them ruin it for you.
Grinning to yourself, you hop in your car, put the Black Sabbath tape you borrowed from Eddie into the player and head home.
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outsideratheart · 10 months
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United (Alexia Putellas x reader)
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A/N: Based off this request. @nowhereff​ I hope you like it!
It was a difficult position to be in as a professional footballer with the Spanish nationality. During the euros you experienced first hand the mistreatment of the team and you found yourself on the receiving end of Vilda’s frustrations one too many times. You had always considered yourself to be a calm person, never one to lose their cool during a match or when the fans pushed the limits with your personal life, yet this situation led to do one thing you never though you would; you asked not to be call up to represent your country.
You and 14 of your team mates had been dubbed ‘LAS 15’.
In the blink of an eye it was June and until this point you had no intention of returning to the team, part of you still doesn’t, but one thing or should you say one person, had other thoughts.
“Y/N, think about it” Alexia had just got received the call up, one that you had declined several times but still she insisted that you join her in Australia and New Zealand “This is the World Cup we are talking about, something we have dreamed of since we were kids”
Alexia spoke the truth. Ever since you were young you wanted to win the World Cup; that and the champions league. Barcelona had secured the latter a week prior so now there was only one more trophy in your dream cabinet.
“Alexia it’s not that easy for me. I told the world that I wouldn’t play for my country until the situation and environment changed. What does it say about me if I go back on everything I have said. I am standing up for our team and the players that come after us, I won’t turn my back them because of my own selfish needs. I hate that I’m saying this but I am one of the best footballers in the world, I have a spotlight on me and I will use my voice for good, I won’t cower because of that man”
Alexia understood where you were coming from. She had known you since you were 9 years old. You would stand up for the little children that were being picked on regardless of the age or size of their bully. Still, she couldn’t help but feel like you were making a dig at her. She may not have been one of the fifteen but she could make a stand instead of going to the World Cup.
“Do you think that’s what I’m doing? Being selfish? Cowering to Vilda?”
“God, no” 
For the past ten minutes you had been pacing up and down the living room whilst Alexia watched as she sat on the kitchen Island. She knew better than to interrupt you when you were in one of these moods. In a small panic that you had hurt her feelings you stop pacing and go straight to her. You stood between her legs, one hand of either of her thighs and her arms locked behind your neck.
“Ale, you supported us but you weren’t one of the 15. I don’t want to be a hypocrite” 
Jorge and his federation buddies had taken football away from you and you weren’t going to let it interfere with your relationship.
“Am I being selfish if I say that I want you there with me?”
“Oh Ale” 
She leaned forward so that she could rest her head on your shoulder. She felt a mixture of shyness and embarrassment. 
Despite having you by her side since the two of you first joined Barcelona she always told herself that she didn’t need anybody. Then as the two of you got older the connection that bonded you both turned out to be more than that of friends and this past year you never left her side, apart from the month you were away for the euros. You went to every physio appointment, stayed back later to workout with her and added her training sessions to your calendar so that you can be there when she second guessed herself. She needed you more than she was willing to admit and she didn’t want to go the World Cup without you. She is still yet to play longer than 30 minutes, never mind start a game but with you by her side she knew that anything was possible, the doubt she feels daily didn’t exist when you were around.
“It’s stupid”
“You are capable of so much Alexia. It doesn’t matter if I am there or not” she doesn’t lift her head so you play with the hairs at the nape of her neck.
“We don’t know that. I have never played a game without you” 
It was some form of miracle but you had never had a injury in your career. You had played every single Barcelona match since your debut, it was an impressive stat but it also meant that Alexia was right.
“Alexia if I go the World Cup then it won’t be about football. They will make it into a story and you know that’s not why I play” 
“I know. I shouldn’t have said anything” 
Alexia pushes herself off the Island and walks off towards your bedroom. At first you want to go after her but then you hear the shower running, now you could go join her and make her forget about the World Cup entirely but that would only be putting off the inevitable. 
You had a call to make and it wasn’t one that you wanted you girlfriend to overhear. This would be between you and the federation, no one else and not the entire world like it had been so far.
It’s save to say when the fans saw your picture and name on the World Cup announcement video they were disappointed and they wasn’t shy about it. You received message after message about how they expected better from you. You didn’t know what to do but then your manager called to say that Maria Tikas had asked for an interview. Now was your chance to explain your reason for rejoining the national team despite asking not to be summoned.
You told her that you had accepted the call up with the intent of being there for your team mates and make sure that the treatment from the Euros did not repeat itself. You told Maria that you were still fighting your case but you were doing do as a Spanish national team player. The interview was honest and it was also the first time you spoke out publicly about the battle between players and federation. 
When you arrived for the first day of training camp you were told straight away that the federation wasn’t happy with your comments and that they expected more from you but their words meant nothing to you. Jorge himself told you that he didn’t want you there and that you would bring a bad energy to the team which you found ironic given the man himself was the reason for the deterioration of many player’s mental health. 
Throughout the group stage games Jorge keeps you as a super sub or even a time wasting sub. It was a insult and you hated that he had been able to get under your skin but you didn’t complain, not in front of the team. The tension was bad enough with none of them want to risk their starting position or get limited game time like you. 
“If she isn’t happy why did she come back to the team. She needs to realise nothing will happen now. She gave up the minute she put that shirt on” Misa had heard Alexia and Aitana ranting about how Jorge is mistreating you.
“At least she stood up for whats right. You stayed in the team when you knew it wasn’t the right thing to do. I may not have been around last summer but you were yet you stayed quiet and for what? So you could stand there in the number 1 shirt which we all know doesn’t belong to you” Alexia snapped.
You had stayed out on the pitch to run shuttles given that you hadn’t really worked your muscles in the last ten minutes of the game but you heard Misa just as you were about to enter the locker room. It was no secret that there was a split within the team and it started with the Real Madrid players. You didn’t want to argue with your team mates and quite frankly you didn’t have the energy in you. This tournament was draining you mentally but there’s no way you could let any of the team know. You did however talk to Mapi about it on a daily basis and she helped to with it.
“Alexia” your girlfriend jumps slightly when she feels your hand on her shoulder.
“She can’t say stuff like that”
“We both know why I am here” with one look into her hazel eyes, Alexia stands down. She knew the reason why you were here; her. Alexia had already showered so she leaves the locker room before she says something she will regret but before doing so she kisses you quickly. The act of PDA was a rarity before now but the world had learnt a lot about your relationship in the past couple of months and it led Alexia to realising she didn’t care what anyone thought. If she wanted to kiss her girlfriend she would.
“Y/N” Misa felt horrible knowing you heard what she said.
“No Misa, you may or may not have noticed but this team is more divided than ever and you slating me for my choices front of everyone doesn’t help. I know that things aren’t great between us, any of us” you point around to your team mates that you weren’t as close with as you used to be “but we are a team and we need to have each others back. We have people trying to put us against each other and we are letting them”
The goalkeeper sinks in her locker upon hearing your words. 
“It’s just so stressful”
You couldn’t help but laugh at this. Misa was young and if she thought this was stressful she would be in for a rude awakening in the upcoming years. You also found it funny how she was stressed when her only responsibility was on the pitch. She was yet to face any kind of media and the fans didn’t put the pressure on her like you they did with you and players such as Alexia.
“Tell me about it” 
“How do you do it?” Athenea asked as she’s stood next to you “He is coming at you every day. He makes you do extra laps and drills in training. He is working you to the bone and for what ten minutes of game time. Is it really worth it?”
You look around to double check who was in the room then you ask Irene to close the door.
“If I let men like Jorge Vilda dictate my future then I wouldn’t be standing here today. Whether he likes it or not he feels threatened by the fight we are bringing to him and let me tell you something Misa, I haven’t given up. You asked why I came back, I came back because Alexia asked me to.  It it wasn’t for her then I would have declined the call up like had the first 5 times I got asked”
“She hates me” Misa knew that pissing Alexia off was bad thing. 
“You spoke shit about Y/N. What did you expect” Aitana knew that you two always had each other’s back and it was best not to feel the wrath of either of you.
You quickly showered before going in search of your girlfriend but you had one more thing you wanted to say before you left the stadium.
“We need to stay united”
The girls who were still in the locker all replied ‘united’. It was a chant that you would use going in the knock out games.
In the semi final you were brought on earlier than the rest of the tournament and it proved to be the right decision because you score almost immediately before assisting Alexia for her first goal on the tournament. It sent a message to the world that Jorge wasn’t utilising his team and after the game a journalist questions his competence. You, who were sat next to him when the question was asked, couldn’t help but laugh. It seemed like the world was finally starting to figure out something you had known for years.
“You shouldn’t have done that” Jorge grabs your wrist pulling you aside before you can enter the changing room.
“What laugh at the fact that everyone is seeing how shit you are as a coach? Oh Jorge it was going to happen at one point. You should be happy that you lasted this long” 
“You’ll regret saying that” 
“I will and how will that happen? I know you didn’t want me here but your bosses knew that if you had any chance of winning the World Cup then I needed to be on the squad and before you deny it they told me this in person so do your worse which is what bench me? You bring me on and I change the game, you can’t afford to keep me on bench for the final so do you worst. Greater men than you have tried to belittle me so you don’t stand a chance”
Your outburst leaves the man in shock and that’s just what you wanted but he won’t admit defeat. Once again he grabs your wrist pulling you back towards him but at this point the heated discussion caught the attention of some of the other players.
“Get your hands of her” Alexia shoves him back causing him to release his hold.
In that moment the whole team comes to together. It is the Spanish national team versus Jorge Vilda. You stand opposite Jorge with the team behind you.
“We will win this World Cup then you will be gone” you don’t take your eyes off the coach as you speak. You leave him at a loss for words and with no other option than to walk away.
From that moment the energy changes within the team. You are united and it strengthens the bond which up until now seems unfixable. It leads to the training sessions been fun like they were in the past. 
On the day of the final are you in the same spot you had been for the start of every game; the bench. It was frustrating to say the least. You knew going against the reigning world champions would be difficult but in no way did you expect to be down 2-0 just 17 minutes into the game. It was torture and what didn’t help is how Jorge looked at you after every goal conceded, it was as if he was blaming you, he was all but saying this is what happens when you let your ego get in the way.
A member of the coaching staff tells you to start warming up just before the end of the first half. You and him work through every drill a substitute does, then you do it again and again because even after being told you are ready Jorge shakes his head, he didn’t want you in this game.
What hurts the most is when Spain have a corner right where you are warming up. Whilst the ref is dealing with an incident in the box Jenni turns to you.
“What do we do? We need you”
“He doesn’t want me in. Take this play by play. Look for Irene’s head and go from there”
You wish you could have told her more but that’s all you had to offer. You were known for your ability to read the game but in order to do so you had to be on the pitch.
“I need to be in the game” you say quietly to the member of the coaching staff in charge of warming you up.
“You do” without saying anything else he leaves and goes back to the dug out. 
You have no choice but stand near the corner flag and watch as the US charge towards the Spain goal, you can see it coming a mile way. The back line is playing too high and it leaves the team vulnerable to the long ball which is exactly what happens. Another goal and it feels like you have been stabbed in the chest. 
Staying out on the field wasn’t the best thing to do but you couldn’t put yourself in the same room as that man and be held responsible for your actions. You abandon your attempt to warm up when the second half starts and take a seat on the bench. The fans start chanting your name and whilst you know their intentions are pure, it only makes you feel worse. You have just about given up when see a woman in a suit approach Jorge on the sidelines. She is on the board of the federation but she wasn’t one of the big fish.
“Bring Y/N on”
“No. She disrespected me, her not playing is her punishment”
“It wasn’t a question. Y/N” she shouted over to you “get ready, Jorge is putting you in” 
“No, i’m no—“
“Jorge you put Y/N in or you will be asked to leave the pitch”
“By who?” 
“By the new federation”
You didn’t really know this woman but you liked her. She was doing what should have been doing ages ago, she is putting Jorge in his place.
The crowd erupts when they see you standing on the sideline as your number got held up next to Esther’s.
“Go! They need you” the Real Madrid forward hugs you quickly before grabbing a vest and taking your seat on the bench.
When a US player going down and needs treatment you call the entire team over, even Misa who is close given that the injury happened on the outside of the box.
“This is not over. Under no circumstance do we give up. We have what it takes to win this game and I have faith in every single one of you. All we have to do is work together”
“United” Alexia says proudly.
“United” every else shouts in unison.
It felt like the clock was ticking down quicker than normal and it was hard to ignore the 3 goals on the scoreboard which were against you but that’s what you had to do. It takes you a few minutes to get a read on the game but as soon as you have it, that is when the fun starts. You run down the middle of the pitch, Jenni by the side of you with the ball and you link up with her just like you had a Barcelona. The two of you attack the American box and the defence doesn’t know how to react. Do they pressure Jenni or risk marking you, in the end they pressure Jenni but it was a mistake because as soon as she sees white shirts running towards her she passes a through ball to you and just like that it is 3-1.
You don’t celebrate, there isn’t time. 
The next play comes when you are running down the wing, your pace being no match for anyone of the US team. Jenni scores a beautiful header after a pin point cross from you. It was 3-2.
“We only need one more to send it extra time” Athenea celebrates.
“We don’t need extra time“ you reply 
“Let me guess, we are ending this now” 
Alexia had heard you say these exact words in Eindhoven and she knew that you would keep your word now just as you did back then.
You get a second goal when Spain are awarded a free kick. This time you do celebrate and you don’t know if its the emotions of being in a final or the feelings that you have been bottling up over the past couple of weeks but you see a fan with a sign saying “Fuck Jorge Vila” so you take it and hold it up high. 
People could no longer question your feelings towards your coach.
“Y/N” Alexia loved what you just did yet she couldn’t help but think of the consequences that it would.
“What?” You shrugged your shoulder innocently “Fuck Jorge Vilda right?” 
“Right” 
It was 3-3 when you approach the 90 minute mark. You look at the big screen to see 5 minutes injury time. You had 5 minutes to score and crown Spain champions of the world.
It’s almost like the rest of the team knew what to do. They need to give you or Alexia the ball, that will give them the best chance of scoring. The two of you had Balon d’Ors for a reason. The whole team pushes high when the clock reaches 94 and it gives the US the feeling of being outnumbered because they don’t know who to mark. You stay back a little to give them the idea that you are preparing for the counter as this is what you did with Barcelona but this wasn’t that. It was the perfect decoy because just as alexia reaches the edge of the box you sprint down the side and to the near post making sure to stay on side. She chips the ball over every white shirt and with the perfect weight behind it, she finds your head and the ball hits the back of the net.
Spain had done it, they had come back from 3-0 down to win 4-3. 
“Cover their badge” you shout to your team mates as you run towards the corner flag and right in front of the a camera. 
Every single player on the pitch as well as those who of ran off the bench stands there with their right hand covering the RFEF badge on the arm of the shirt. The message was clear as day and they stood together publicly for the first time since all this happened.
The final whistle is blown seconds later and you fall to you knees. You couldn’t believe that you had done it, that this team had done it despite the problems that were taking place off the pitch.
The celebration is something you will never forget. After everything that happened you had been stripped of your captaincy but Ivana insisted that you be the one to accept and lift the trophy. It would go down as the proudest day of your life, until the day you have kids.
The rest of the world however will remember the press conference that followed. You sat at a table with Jorge to the right of you and the rest of the team standing at the back of the room watching in anticipation. They didn’t know what to expect but they knew that you wouldn’t hold you tongue, not after the way Jorge had treated you this tournament.
“I think I speak for the rest of the world when I say I was shocked to see Y/N Y/L/N on the bench today. Can I ask why that is?” 
Oh this would be good. There was no valid reason to have you on the bench for the games thus far, never mind the final.
“Y/N is a valued member of this team”
“Then why did you refuse to sub me into the game? Why did it take someone from the federation to come down to the pitch for you to do so?” you asked him. 
With the silence that had filled the room you could hear a pin drop.
“I—It was the best decision for the team”
“I disagree” the journalist who asked the original question said.
“Me too” “me too” “And me” the team add from the back of the room.
“Considering I scored a hattrick and assisted the other goal I’m going to have to agree with them Jorge”
“I am the coach of this team and I made a decision one which I stand by. We won didn’t we and that is because I subbed Y/N in” Jorge tried to play the hero but you wouldn’t let this happen.
“No Jorge, like I said before the federation ordered you to sub me in. It wasn’t your decision. In fact I remember you saying quote unquote ‘No. She disrespected me, her not playing is her punishment’
The whole room audibly gasped at your revelation.
“We won didn’t we” his smugness would be his downfall.
“We won” you point to yourself and the rest of the team “You failed to coach us from the very first training session” 
Jorge goes on to the explain his choices but he is only digging himself a deeper hole to fall in. It was amusing but you really didn’t want to spend your night listening to him explain his poor decisions, you want to celebrate with your girlfriend and the rest of the team so you execute your plan which you organised when Spain had reached the final. Maria Tikas sat in the front row. You found it fitting that the woman who told your story before the tournament started was the same one to give it its ending.
“Y/N I have a question” you signal for her to go ahead “you told me that you came to the World Cup to support your team mates, your girlfriend Alexia Putellas specifically” Alexia blushes in the background and the wink you send her only deepens the blush “Now you are world champion, what does your future with the national team look like?” 
“This will be my last time in a Spain shirt until the man next to me in no longer part of the team and the environment we play in has been re-evaluated. We, as a team, deserve better and the change needs to happen now. Therefore I hereby resign from the Spanish national team” with that you stand up and leave the room. Your team mates follow in suit. All of them ready to follow in your footsteps. 
“I’m proud of you” Alexia takes you hand, intertwining her fingers with yours.
“This is the moment things change Alexia. We will make sure that those that come next don’t have to go through the same treatment we did”
644 notes · View notes
koorminii · 2 years
Text
COLLEGESLUTS.COM | SKZ OT8 SERIES (m)
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A crude name for an even cruder site, and the self-proclaimed bane of your existence. Made by thirsty sophomores when you were in freshman year, it’s something that’s stuck like glue in the minds of the student body. No one can resist a quick click, seeing your peers showing off their sexual fantasies for others to enjoy, posting their sexual escapades for others to see— except for you who’s hated the site since you first knew about it. Still, a year later, you’re vying for it to get shut down. Well they can’t have that, can they? They’re just gonna have to convince you the site isn’t all that bad.
GENRES: smut, fluff, crack, angst — college au
WARNINGS: profanity, sexual content/themes, alcohol consumption; more warnings tbd in individual one-shots
A/N: hi my loves, this series was super impulsive 😭. I thought of it today, am posting the series masterpost today, and started writing the first one-shot today, but i thought it would be fun and decided why not— and it would be easier for me to follow a storyline anyway so hopefully it won’t take that long for me to complete. Since I doubt i’m doing kinktober in full and am working on a long halloween fic, I feel like spoiling y’all with other things when i can!
each one-shot shouldn’t be too long, but i tend to get carried away more often than not. The first one-shot (hyunjin) will be the longest since it’s an introduction to the CSC universe. The series will be loosely connected and will tie back on things, but don’t consider the fact that you’re with eight guys at once like cheating bc they all know abt each other and each oneshot is centered on one member. Since it does follow somewhat of a storyline, the order of the fics isn’t by age but by their role in the CSC.
send an ask or comment to be added to the taglist!!
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𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔.
HWANG HYUNJIN IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: hwang hyunjin x f!reader
GENRES: smut, crack, fluff (?), one-sided enemies to lovers, college au
WARNINGS: smut, alcohol consumption, profanity, inexperienced reader, corruption kink, more to be added
SUMMARY: There are three things you hate more than anything: 1. Your english Lit. professor, 2. Frat parties, and last but most definitely not least, 3. CollegeSluts.com and their founders. There are three things Hyunjin hates more than anything: 1. College, 2. Back alley blowjobs, and 3. The frustrating desire to fuck you silly.
STATUS: WATCHED
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BANG CHAN IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: bang chan x f! reader
GENRES: smut, fluff, crack, friends to lovers, college au
WARNINGS: smut, profanity, inexperienced reader; more to be added
SUMMARY: Just because you’re friends with the group of eight doesn’t mean you’re going to stop fighting for the end of CSC, and Chan knows it. He’s just gonna have to distract you from your goal in any way he can, and there’s one thing he knows how to do better than anything else.
STATUS: WATCHED
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SEO CHANGBIN IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: seo changbin x f!reader
GENRES: smut, crack, kinda enemies to lovers, college au
WARNINGS: smut, profanity; more to be added.
SUMMARY: problems arising in the CSC means stress. Lots of it, and who else would Changbin look for in order to relieve that stress besides the cause of it?
STATUS: WATCHED
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YANG JEONGIN IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: yang jeongin x f!reader
GENRES: smut, crack, ? to lovers, jeongin doesn’t hate you but doesn’t trust you.
WARNINGS: smut, profanity, sexual “tests”; more to be added.
SUMMARY: Jeongin still has his doubts about you, and you can see on his face how even after all this time he’s still mistrusting of you. All you can do is pass his tests one by one until you succeed and he finally considers you one of CSC’s own.
STATUS: WATCHED
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LEE FELIX IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: lee felix x f!reader
GENRES: smut, fluff, crack, friends to lovers
WARNINGS: smut, profanity, switch!felix; more to be added
SUMMARY: Felix has always been sweet to you, even when you were trying to tear down everything he’d ever worked for— to the point where you always wondered how he got wrapped up with this group in the first place. Well, you think you’re about to find out.
STATUS: WATCHED
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KIM SEUNGMIN IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: kim seungmin x f!reader
GENRES: smut, super fluff, best friends to lovers
WARNINGS: explicit sexual content, profanity, the feels; more to be added.
SUMMARY: Seungmin has been there since your freshman year, always ready to lend you a helping hand and support you no matter how annoying he sometimes could be, and this time is no different. After a falling out with the CSC, he’s there to rub your back, hold your hand, and make you feel good.
STATUS: WATCHED
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LEE MINHO IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: lee minho x f!reader
GENRES: smut, angst-ish, ex-friends to friends to lovers, college au
WARNINGS: explicit sexual content, profanity, an annoying amount of bickering; warnings to be added.
SUMMARY: Three months after your inevitable fallout with the CSC, even after making up, your relationship with the guys is still tense. Minho thinks he can fix that— and give you the punishment you deserved all those months ago.
STATUS: WATCHED
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HAN JISUNG IS LIVE.
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PAIRING: han jisung x f!reader
GENRES: smut, friends to lovers, college au
WARNINGS: …. the same as the other 7 posts. rebounding; more to be added.
SUMMARY: Han has had a girlfriend for as long as you’ve known him, he’s never been close to you even after your integration into the CSC, and you didn’t think that would ever change.
STATUS: WATCHED
mini taglist: @myjisung, @hwan-g, @hoeforstraykids, @americanokisses, @ughbehavior; i’m definitely missing some but i’ll update this soon!!
3K notes · View notes
cherryslyce · 1 year
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Second Son (XVI) | Regulus Black
Series Synopsis: Forbidden from contacting Harry over the summer, you opt to explore the eerie halls of Grimmauld Place where you stumble upon a lonely portrait of the House's second son.
— Chapter Synopsis: The soul-tracking ritual ensues, and Anders has a precarious idea.
Part XV / Part XVII / Series Masterlist
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Pairing: Regulus Black x GN!Reader
Notes: I hope you guys enjoy this chapter :). Sincerely hoping this chapter doesn't glitch again.
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The excitement of performing the soul-tracking ritual wore off rather quickly when you realized that you had to draw out all of the runes since Anders was unable to crouch down. It was an extensive process and each character had to be extremely precise, causing your fingers to cramp up rather quickly. 
Your feet were feeling fuzzy as the circulation in your legs started to suffer from your position, your knees cracking noisily with every shuffle you took to continue mapping out the ritual circle. 
“I can’t feel my legs anymore.” You whined, upper body flopping down as you braced yourself with your palms. 
Anders grunts from in front of you, “You’re not even halfway there yet, and careful you almost smudged the Dagaz.” His drawl has you huffing, head instinctually snapping to the side to make sure you didn’t actually smear anything. 
“Easy for you to say, you’re sitting on a bloody stool while I’m hunched over, practically shining your boots!” Your exasperation was painted across your face, words spewing out in a mixture of annoyance and jest. 
The man rolls his eyes and rubs a hand over his knee, the joint no doubt aching, “Careful loyal vassal of mine, I am graciously offering you my help after all,” his tone of amusement melts away and he suddenly grows serious, “but it is imperative that we do this quickly.” 
You huff and adjust your position, swinging your head up to look at the man in curiosity, “Why’s that?” 
Anders’ face is darkened with a grim frown, and he peers down at the papers on his laps, “You said that those buddies of yours were going to kill Tom, right?” 
“Yes…” Your uncertain tone has you fidgeting with your wand habitually, eyes flickering between the window of the room and the man in front of you. 
“Well he’s puppeting the inferis with his magic, so they’ll undoubtedly be reduced to husks once he’s gone. So we need to hurry,” Anders elucidates, mouth set into a firm line as he delved deeper into his thoughts. 
Putting a hand up, you blink owlishly at the man, “This is too much information. So, not only are inferis still housing their original souls – but you’re saying that it's Voldemort’s magic that’s tying these souls down to the land of the living?” 
You didn’t know whether you wanted to curse the detestable man into oblivion or begrudgingly allow yourself to be grateful that his existence meant Regulus’ soul was still with you. 
Well, he was chaining down hundreds of souls for his own selfish desires – so you were leaning towards wanting to stick your hand through his head. 
“Only the inferis of his own creation, but yes, in theory.” The man looks mildly impressed at your quick thinking. 
“Would it be a bad idea to owl Harry and ask him to raincheck on his plans to eviscerate the Dark Lord?” You draw a hand to rub at your forehead, a newfound migraine blooming from the back of your neck and straining across your occiput. 
Anders gives you an unimpressed eyebrow raise before waving his hand towards the abandoned quarter-circle behind you, “A terrible idea. Now, let’s continue.” 
You finish drawing the ritual circle an hour after sunset. 
Your hand was shaking uncontrollably, jerking with every cramp that tugged at your muscles. You had begun sweating at one point, causing Anders to limp over and slide both of the windows open. The cool air bristled through the room and circled around all the loose papers, the sounds of rustling and quiet cruising from the older man flowing around the atmosphere. 
As you step back to survey your hard work, you can’t help the smile that plays at your lips: the intricacies of the circle was alluring, practically glowing under the yellow light fixtures above you. The wind began to whistle, and Anders took that as a cue to interrupt your little reprieve, “Looks decent enough.” 
“Decent? Have you gone senile since the last time we chatted? This bloody thing is the embodiment of perfection!” You cry out in incredulity, pondering all the ways you could attach the nifty piece of work to your academic portfolio.
Anders rolls his eyes and organizes his papers, “Yes, yes, you’re practically a Runes Master. Take a picture of it, why don’t ya?” 
Playfully narrowing your eyes at his back, you go to retort, but a knock at the door has you pausing just as you open your mouth. Sharing a look with Anders, you carefully move to investigate, only cracking the door open marginally in order to hide your work. 
It wouldn’t do you much good to have the neighbors thinking you were summoning something. 
“Luna?” Your squawk of surprise only causes the girl to smile, eyes darting over your head as her gaze seems to fade in and out of fixation. 
Bouncing on her heels, she reaches into her pocket, “So, you’re done?” 
“Yeah, I finished drawing up the circle. I think the old man wants to perform the actual ritual tonight though, so I won’t see you until tomorrow.” You exhale tiredly and murmur to yourself, “If I wake up, that is.” 
Luna nods quickly and pulls out a few items from her coat, “I see. Well, I’ve brought some things. I was told that you were in need of this as well by the Humdingers” In her outstretched hands, you see a couple of wrapped sandwiches and a small camera. 
“What?” You gape and slowly reach forwards, “Where did you get a camera from, little moon?” 
The girl smiles brightly and fiddles with her coat buttons, “I asked Asger.” You nod in appreciation and smile at the girl, waving with your full hands as she gracefully skips away towards the house. 
You retreat back into the room and brandish the camera at the expectant man with a victorious smirk, “I have great friends.” 
Anders grunts and reaches for one of the sandwiches, “That’s my camera, kid.” 
You examine the device with your oh so supple fingers, and ignore the urge to stick your tongue out at him, your sensibility winning out for once. As you both eat in silence, your eyes run over the respectable pile of papers in front of Anders, realizing that the man was absolutely serious about publishing your findings. 
“What have you got so far?” You nod towards his papers. 
His eyes quickly flicker beside him, “Magical essences and the imbuing work your boy did, and now I’m drafting up some pages about inferis and their souls.” 
You hum quietly and dust off your hands as you finish the last scraps of your food, feeling more vigilant as your aching stomach settles. The camera was smaller than the jarring flash bulb that Rita Skeeter always had around, and if anything, seemed way more practical. 
It was a bit blocky and had a round lens in the center with a small depression that you could only assume was for the flash. The bottom of the camera had a small rectangular slit — an output. 
“Polaroid 600. Film is as expensive as it gets, so don’t you go and waste it.” Anders’ quietly mumbles as he gets up from his spot, hands reaching for the camera. As he fiddles around with it for a few moments, the top suddenly seems to prop up and he hands it back to you with a satisfied nod, “Think you know how to operate a camera?” 
“I’m not a dunce, thank you very much.” Your riposte causes him to roll his eyes as he gestures for you to move towards the circle. Despite your initial indignance, it took you a few moments of consideration and blind thumbing until you were confident enough to snap the photo. As you (luckily) manage to get a good shot, you conceal your surprise as the photo immediately begins to peek out of the bottom slit, slowly being spat out. 
How convenient.
You nimbly pull the photo out once it seems to stop sputtering, and hand the camera over to Anders before peering at the developing square film. Slowly, you watch as the outlines of the ritual circle bloom into visibility. 
You take a couple more moments to run your eyes over the photo before placing it in Anders’ awaiting palm. The man hobbles over to his table and clips the photo to one of the pages, placing the camera on the stack of papers afterwards. 
“Okay, now put your boy’s photo in the center—next to the Uruz symbol.” 
You wordlessly comply with Anders’ words, and slowly tiptoe out of the circle, eyes never straying from Regulus’ face. The man moves to the opposite side of the circle, and pats at the air, gesturing for you to sit down. 
Watching from your position on the floor, Anders begins to chant evenly, eyes closed as you feel him begin to gather his magic to pool across the symbols. The faint steely nature of his magical signature washes over you, and you clasp your hands together in your lap as you feel an immense pressure begin to weigh on the room. Regulus’ photo gives a faint jolt, then another, and then another, until the whole paper begins to vibrate. 
You watch in awe as the photo slowly rises into the air, the Uruz symbol glowing brightly with a faint red hue. In the blink of an eye, the photo jerks sideways and falls onto the Hic symbol to your left just as Anders’ chanting ceases. 
“Hic? Here? What does it mean, here?” Your questions seem to spill out uncontrollably, and you see the older man give the photo a look of consideration. 
“I’m not quite sure. Usually, souls still in the realm of the living are classified as Vivus,” Anders mutters, hand coming up to rub at his chin, “Kid, is that ring of yours imbued with his magic?” 
You nod and reach for your ring, fingers running over the two snakes that you’ve grown accustomed to. Anders sighs before slapping his hand over his entire face, dragging it down as he seems to wage an internal war with himself. 
“You said your boy was in a cave?” 
You raise an eyebrow at him, and nod slowly, “Yes…and so are hundreds of other inferis, why?” 
The man meets you gaze with a determined look as you slowly stand up, hands fiddling with your ring. 
“Well, let’s go fetch your boy.” 
The journey back to the cave was bittersweet, and you almost lost your footing as you apparated to the very spot you had before, except this time with a rather grumpy presence by your side. Water batted against the rock you were rooted to, droplets of water flying into your face periodically. You could barely make out the view in front of you as the moon faintly illuminated the waves.
As you apparate with Anders to the shore, you feel a lump grow in your throat. Your heart was beating violently against your chest, and a cold sweat started to break through the surface of your skin. 
The muted crunching of sand and rocks under your shoes grounded you to reality as the void of the cave engulfed you, washing away the sea of stars that had been beaming at you from above.
“Lumos.” 
As you extended your wand in front of you, you had half the mind to be cautious of potential bloodthirsty death eaters or one psychotic dark lord, realizing that perhaps the certifiable man would be on the upkeep for his horcruxes. 
Soon, you both reached the rounded end of the cave, and Anders shoots you an unimpressed look. Holding a hand up at him, you extinguish your lumos and bring your wand to your palm, “Secare.”
Dragging the tip of your wand against your palm, the spell slowly cuts your skin enough to draw blood. Satisfied with your work, you swipe your bloodied cut against the damp rocks behind you. 
“Lumos.” 
The wall of charcoal stone crumbles away like you remembered, and you’re immediately met with a wave of faint heat. 
Remnants of your fire storm from last time?
“Bloody hell,” Anders croaks from behind you, eyes glimmering at the sight of the sumptuous crystal clusters. The milky geodes sent a shiver down your spine as you started to draw a resemblance between their geometric planes and the cloudy skin of the inferis. 
Making your way through the dark ventricle of minerals, you slowly emerge into the belly of the cave, the familiar void of water just meters away from you. 
“We’re here. They’re in there,” your voice falls into a whisper, “he’s in there.”
Anders steps out from behind you and pulls out his own wand, the worn ashen wood barely visible in the light of your lumos. Tilting his head towards you, he looks at you with a solemn gaze before asking, “His full name?” 
“Regulus Arcturus Black.” 
Nodding, the man turns towards the lake and moves his wand counterclockwise, “Prodire Regulus Arcturus Black.” 
Nothing happens for a few seconds, until abruptly — something breaks through the surface of the water and flies towards your awaiting figures, stilling to a stop in front of Anders as if colliding with an invisible wall. Your hand swings to cover your mouth as your eyes trail along the spindly creature: its body was slack in the air, arms stiff like milky needles, chest unnaturally thin with a protruding rib cage that threatened to burst through bruised skin, and a rawboned face veiled by the darkness. 
This thing was Regulus?
You felt your world begin to tip and spin, eyes burning then blurring rapidly. Shivers wracked through your chest as sobs seemed to well in your throat. Closing your eyes, you try to steady your breathing, but the flashing image of Regulus’ face and then the sight of the horrid creature infiltrate your head. 
It feels as though a millennia of your discombobulation passes by before you feel a firm grip on your shoulder, the gesture helping to keep you upright on your feet. 
“Come on, kid,” Anders’ face comes into view and you see his eyes soften uncharacteristically, his mouth set into a hard frown. Your eyes stray to the side and you see that the man had summoned a cloth to cover the inferi during your small episode, the lumpy bundle now floating in the air nearby. 
Nodding quickly, you swallow harshly before spinning around, “Right. Sorry.” Your whisper is met with a comforting silence, and you appreciated more than ever, Anders’ ability to know when words weren’t needed. 
As you both stiffly trek back through the cave, you begin to feel a weight of foreboding blanket your body. Picking up the pace, you step out of the mouth of the cave with sweaty hands, eyes darting around wildly. 
“Hurry,” your choked whisper confuses the older man, but he abides nonetheless. As you grab his forearm and hesitantly grab a part of the covered inferi, you hear a faint warping echo from off to the side. 
Gasping quietly into the chilly air, you barely catch a glimpse of the familiar figure before you’re tugged away by the distortion of apparition. You can barely breathe as your heart seems to stutter uncontrollably. 
You land back inside the research room with Anders and Regulus’ inferi, not even noticing how cramped the space now was as you tried to quell your panic. 
“Kid? What’s wrong?” Anders floats the clothed figure down into the center of the circle as you buckle to the ground, blood flushing cold. 
“Voldemort. He was there.” You gasp out. 
The man jolts to a paralyzed freeze as his eyes widen comically, his heart no doubt beginning to race as fast as yours. You shake your head jerkily and wave your hand aimlessly, “He didn’t see you. Or well, you were covered by the cloth, but he definitely noticed me.” 
The dryness of your mouth was beginning to prickle and itch, your skin suddenly feeling too tight on your body. You were sure he recognized you, after all, he was always in Harry’s head. 
“Then we just have to hurry a bit.” Anders' steady words have you snapping your attention over to him, confused as to why he was so calm now. Seeing your distraught gaze, he sighs, “He won’t come for you for now, I’m sure he is focused on your other friends. Besides, even if he were, he has no idea where to even look.” 
Nodding with an unconvinced frown, you feel your fear melt away into a stony resolve, eyes flickering over to look at the figure laying in the circle. 
“Thank you, Anders.” Your dry whisper has him cracking a small smile. 
“Thank me when your boy is back up and running.” 
You were robotically drawing more rune characters, eyes unfocused as you were too entranced by your thoughts. You weren’t sure what the older man was planning as he hadn’t explained to you what this additional ritual entailed, but you were determined to make it work. 
As you complete the last etching, head rising up to look at the concentrated man, he finally breaks the tense atmosphere, “I don’t know if it’ll work, but the combination of his soul and your ring might just do the trick.”
Tilting your head to the side, you try not to sound too hopeful, “So, he’ll be completely recovered if it works?” 
“Not completely, he’ll need time to rejuvenate his magical core. This would be unprecedented, kid. I don’t have all the answers, and I can’t promise that it will work, but I am going to do my best.” His eyes are unwavering, back straightened with coiled tension. 
You nod hastily, knowing that you were both pretty much running on wishes. As Anders double checks your rune work, you slowly slip your ring off your finger, cringing as the cold air brushes against your naked finger. 
You hadn’t ever taken it off before. 
Placing the cool band next to the covered figure, you step out of the circle and clench your hands. Anders nods in confirmation before stepping out as well, slowly hobbling over to stand on the opposite side of the circle. 
“Let your magic funnel out into the circle as well. You won’t need to chant.” Anders' brief words have you nodding, and you slowly shuffle from leg to leg, fatigue starting to seep into your veins. 
The chanting begins soon after, and you allow the metaphorical valves of your magical core to open, feeling the coolness of your magic sweeping to tangle with Anders’ metallic magic. Both of your magical signatures dance around the circle and collect in the center, flexing together above the figure. The entire rune circle seems to radiate in shades of reds and stormy greys before blazing into an endless black.  
Suddenly, you feel magic seep from the clothed figure — a deep, harrowing magic that roused with a small rumble before erupting into a suffocating cloud that could only be described as numbing. 
It was nothing like Regulus’ magic, which meant that this corrupted energy belonged to Voldemort. You grit your teeth as you flush out more of your magic to try and drive away Voldemort’s lingering signature, the psychopath’s magic seeming to screech violently at your attempt. 
The prolonged battle with the stifling magic finally ends as the dark cloud is ripped away from you, pulled in all directions towards the additional runes you drew, the characters radiating in almost a blinding way before ripping apart the corrupted magic. 
The once dark circle stews into a cool grey before disintegrating into a pale green, the light beating melodically. You watch in wonderment as the magic in the ring bubbles into your magic, intertwining with yours before slowly clutching at Anders’ as well. Your potent whirl of combined magic slowly descends towards the clothed figure, causing it to jerk wildly. 
The cloth shuffles with the movements and you see it begin to pull upwards as if the inferi was arching towards your magic. Suddenly, the strings of magic slam into the clothed figure, sending shockwaves throughout the room. 
As you hear a few books tumble to the ground at the energy, the figure twitches once more before falling still again. Anders continues to chant for a few more moments as the circle flares into a blinding white light before it, too, simmered into nothingness. 
You nearly topple over in exhaustion as the energy draws back into your body, the synergies of magic in the room evaporating almost instantaneously. Anders wipes his forehead with his sleeve, and shakily stumbles over to his table for stability. 
“Did it work?” Your voice is crackly as a sharp, sticky pain climbs up your neck. 
The man huffs and glances at you before slowly making his way towards the figure, grunting as he tries to crouch down. He tugs the cloth upward and peers inside, expression unreadable. 
“Well?” 
Anders looks up at you, eyebrows drawn, “I have a lot more to write about.” 
Leaping forward at his words, you rip away the cloth slightly to expose the figure’s head, and you nearly pass out on the spot. 
“It worked. It worked. It worked.” Your quiet chants spurs on a wave of tears as you slowly run your fingers over Regulus’ face. The boy looked picturesque in his sleeping state, face no longer emaciated and bruised, but now mirroring his appearance from when he was just a portrait in your pocket. 
You brush his curls aside and resist the urge to just keel over and fall asleep on him, your magical exhaustion echoing through your bones. 
“Do you have something else on you that’s imbued with his magic?” Anders’ quiet words have you snapping out of your euphoric state, eyes drawn up in confusion. Seeing your perplexity, he clarifies, “He might not remember you, this ritual simply revitalized him and unchained his soul. He might only remember the events before his death.” 
You pause at the revelation and sit up straighter, hands dropping to your sides. Gaping for a few moments, your mind whirs as you try and grasp for the right words, “Uh, wait, yes. I have these.” Your hands fish into your pockets and you pull out the tattered pieces of the golden portrait frame, outstretching them for the man to see. 
“His portrait frame?” Anders’ eyebrows shoot up in stupefaction. 
Nodding, you slowly drop the pieces into his rough palm, “It doesn’t matter.” The man frowns, puzzled, so you continue, “As long as he’s okay, it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t remember me.” 
Straightening up from his position, he stares at the pieces of wood in his hand, “He just might remember… if these are truly imbued with his magic.” Looking up, you see skepticism flicker in his eyes, “Are you too beat for another ritual?” 
“You should be asking yourself that, old man.”
You don’t remember much that happens afterwards. 
As you crack your eyes open, lingering fatigue weighing on your eyelids, you are keenly aware of a hand running across your shoulders. 
“Reg?” Your voice comes out as a strained whisper. 
A familiar face pops into your line of sight, “He’s okay, just resting upstairs.” Luna’s smile warms your chest, and you resist the urge to turn over and bury yourself into the warmth of her arms. 
Your body was incredibly sore from the activities of the previous day, and you were sure that your magical core was rolling about, emptily inside of you. The longer you laid, the more groggy you grew as the air started to warm against your skin. 
Gently pushing up from the mattress underneath you, you run a hand down your place as Luna shifts to stand up. The girl helps you shuffle upstairs and towards the bathroom, quietly insisting that you wash up as she prepares tea for you. 
Sluggishly washing up, you take a moment to peer into the cloudy mirror, raising an eyebrow at the sight of heavy bags under your eyes. Your shoulders sagged from exhaustion, and the sound of your grumbling stomach prompted you to make your way towards the kitchen. 
As you slowly trudged into the room, eyes squinting from the beams of sunlight that flitted through the window, you see Asger approach you with a plate in hand. 
“Good afternoon. Dad’s in his research shed right now.” The man extends the plate to you, and your mouth waters at the sight of the hearty lunch. You nod in thanks and drop down onto an awaiting chair, gaze straying towards one of the closed doors down the hall. 
Asger, seeing your restless ministrations, chuckles before answering your unvoiced question, “He’s in there. Hasn’t awakened yet, but Dad said it’s only a matter of time. He's recovering quite fast.” 
Right, your rituals worked. Both of them. It was starting to come back now, and you could feel the weight of the frame pieces and your ring in your pocket, both now depleted of Regulus’ magic. 
Scarfing down your meal, and ignoring Asger’s cringe, you start to mentally debate on whether you should visit Anders first, or Regulus. Luna places a mug in front of you, and plops down into the seat next to yours, fingers fiddling with a few strings of yarn. 
Regulus won out, of course. 
As you dismiss yourself with endless words of gratitude to your two friends, you slowly make your way into the room Regulus was resting in. You cross through the threshold, mug in hand, and immediately surrender yourself to the comforting wave of magic that envelops you. 
The warm magic — Regulus’ magic, brings tears to your eyes, and you have to take a few moments to compose yourself. The aching hollowness in your heart, the one you had grown accustomed to in the following months after the destruction of his portrait, seems to sing with inklings of joy. 
You were still in a state of disbelief, mind reeling from the fact that you not only discovered uncharted branches of magic, but also that you got Regulus back. No, not only you — Sirius was going to get Regulus back, too. 
The boy in question was laid on a makeshift bed, covered by a fleece blanket. Anders took up the great responsibility of clothing him after your flustered realization that he was nude, the man murmuring tidbits about how he did the same for Asger when the younger man fractured his hip years ago. 
You walk over and sit down by his side, brushing your hand over his hair. 
Things would change now. They would be better. 
You spend a long while just sitting by the boy’s side, mind still unconvinced that he wasn’t just a figment of your imagination. 
After a long thread of thoughts that devolved into heart wrenching what if’s, you decide to pay a visit to Anders, immensely grateful for his help and wisdom. The sunny skies slowly dimmed as clouds drifted by, the air chilling to sooth the faint migraine that still sunk its claws into your head. 
As you make your way into the research room, you can’t mask the smile that stretches across your lips. Anders was hunched over his table, hand moving furiously across a sea of pages as he tried to document every droplet of theory and fact on the papers. Not wanting to interrupt the man’s train of thought, you linger by the doorway before slowly teetering towards a fallen stack of books. 
You organize the endless towers of tomes for a few minutes before Anders takes note of your presence as he goes to stretch his back. 
“Finally awake?” His voice is light, and you could see the remnants of engrossment creeping in his eyes. He truly did have a passion for this branch of research.  
You nod and grin brightly at the man, “Sure am. Now, are you going to accept my thank you?” 
Anders grunts and waves you off with an amused eye roll — the closest thing to a “you’re welcome” in his language, and turns back to his papers, “Anyway, another owl came for you this morning. The letter should be on your stool.” 
As the man resumes his writing, you peer around to try and find the envelope, clicking your tongue when you find the paper beaming at you from across the room. 
Dear Padfoot’s pup, 
We hope you are well. At first, we weren’t going to accept the offer, but some unexpected events happened that forced us away. We are safe now with the frightening widow. We’ve gotten two more, but now the Goblins hate us. 
Stay safe. We are going to remain here until we are forced to confront the darkness. Unfortunately, we fear that it will be soon. 
We miss you. Padfoot keeps whining, we think he misses you most. 
-Prongslet and co. 
You laugh lightly at the contents of the letter, and you fold the paper back up. Good to know that Harry and the others were safe with the Contessa at the very least. As you stuff the paper back in the envelope, you see another folded paper sidled against the wall of the envelope. 
Hello lost friend of mine, 
A certain dragon of ours is growing restless, we fear that his blood father is in trouble with a certain man. The Carrows are a nightmare, and it appears that many students are disappearing with every passing day. Theodore keeps shooting down my (entirely plausible) theory that those twin professors of ours are hiding their bodies in a dark closet somewhere. 
I’ve received a letter from my mother informing me of the rearrangements at home, and I must say, it was quite a surprise. I haven’t heard back from you since you’ve departed, and I almost thought you were dead for a while. Glad to hear that you aren’t. 
Theodore says hi, and he wants to know all the research you’ve done. Our dragon also says hi and that he hopes you received his last letter. 
I hope to hear from you soon. 
(Reply to me.)
-B
“Was it a tawny owl?” Your question rings out into the quiet atmosphere, drawing Anders out of his work. 
The man gives you a grunt of confirmation and you nod in satisfaction. It would appear that Harry is corresponding to you via Contessa Zabini, the woman no doubt telling Blaise to forward the letter to you along with his. 
Merlin, what a strange web of dynamics.
As you tuck away the papers into your pockets, a knock has you spinning on your heel in curiosity. Anders barely even looks up from his work as you make your way to the door, a wave of deja vu slamming into you. 
Opening the door, you see Luna smiling brightly at you, similar to her airy demeanor from the night before.
Before you can get a word out, the girl quickly supplies you with news that has air fleeing from your lungs, “He’s awake.” 
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badfictropes · 1 month
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Danny/Dani and Clark/Conner
(Warning: This is just my opinions and while I would love to hear other thoughts please be polite in your comments.)
Now I want to start by saying I don’t think Clark is wrong in feeling the way he does about Conner and about not wanting to be a father to him. But the way he dealt with and expressed those feelings is my problem. The way Clark treats Conner as if he isn't a real person with emotions and feelings and refuses to acknowledge Conner's personhood is fucked up.
Clark doesn’t want to be Conner’s father and while this is deeply unfair for Conner and will no doubt leave a scar it would be far worse to try and force Conner on Clark, I don’t doubt Clark will not be able to be the parent Conner needs.(Side note:does Lois or Clark’s parents ever find out about Conner in canon?) In DpxDc fics and prompts the JL trying to force Clark to play daddy is not going to do any good for Connor or for Clark. Clark does not see Conner as his own person/a person at all; all Clark sees is evidence of his violation and while this sucks for Conner forcing the two together isn’t going to help.
I read one DpxDc fic where Clark got therapy about this(Side note: this fic also pointed out how unethical it is to have a therapist that not only works under you but is also your personal friend ie Dinah. A lot of fics have her as not only the JL’s counselor but individual teammates personal therapist which just can’t be ethical.) and his therapist pointed out that Clark talks about Conner worse than he does Lex who actually violated his consent. I thought this was a very good point and definitely something Clark needs to think about. How is his opinion of Conner(who is the innocent and also a victim in this) worse than his one of Lex?.
Now for the Dp side. I personally am a fan of Danny being a mom(gender-neutral) to Dani(and Dan) and it’s my top 3 favorite Dp tropes but I know not everyone prefers it. While I imagine that after everything was over the full force of his violation at Vlad’s hands hit him I don’t think Danny ever wished Dani didn’t exist at all, I don’t think it ever even occurred to him to think that way. I could see him wishing the circumstances around her existence was different(after all Neverborne are a thing and it would be just like Danny to make one by accident) but he could never regret Her no matter how she got here. I’ve seen people mention that Dani manipulated and betrayed Danny and I’m just like while Dani has Danny’s memories she was literally created a few months ago cut her some slack, Dani was also being manipulated and used and Danny knows that he understands that; it why he not only helped her but forgave her. And I know people are going to be like forgiving someone is not that easy or quick but sometimes it is especially when your not even 18 and full set in your stubborn mindset and when your an empath like most people hc ghost to be(a little hard to stay mad for long when you can literally feel someone’s regret and remorse, it doesn’t hurt Danny no doubt saw Dani as someone smaller and weaker that needed his help and protection.)
Onto DpxDc. Now I think Danny would be sympathetic to Clark’s feelings and circumstances but I think his sympathy would end when he hears/witnesses how Clark treats Conner. Clark’s feelings are valid but how he deal with/expresses those feelings are not. Clark is a grown ass man and should know better than to take out his anger and pain on a child(Side note: Do you think Clark wouldn’t be as cruel to Conner or that the JL would be more intolerant of Clark’s behavior towards Conner if Conner was younger/a baby?). Danny would find Clark’s treatment/opinion of Conner deplorable after all Neverborn/Mirror born are precious no matter how they came to be and while it understandable Clark can’t be a parent to Conner that doesn’t mean someone shouldn’t be. Conner deserves to have a parent, a family that loves and cares about him; he deserves to be treated his own person and choose how he wants to live his life(not just be a hero) and since he won’t get that from Clark, the JL should find him a good foster parent he can get that from.
So in conclusion I think Danny would be sympathetic and understand of Clark’s circumstances until he sees Clark’s treatment of Conner/hears his opinin of Conner and then the sympathy is over; Danny will then focus on Conner and helping him/helping to figure out what’s best for him.
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Love me or hate me, both are in my favor (Miguel O’Hara x Fem! Reader [HS Academic Rivals AU])
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Y’all ready for Miguel to finally kiss (Y/N)’s ass??!?!?!? Not proofread enjoy lol, I had a lot of fun writing this. I tried to be a bit artsy near the end it it’s too cringe I’ll probably delete it and redo it lmao.
Cursing, Miguel finally getting his shit together, lol he’s ooc but it’s okayyy lol
(Y/N)- Your name, (L/N)-Last name, (N/N)-Nickname.
Word count: 2.1k
Series Masterlist Series Playlist
Chapter 12: What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way
You hated to admit it, but you kind of missed throwing away those stupid little apology notes from Miguel. Oddly enough, they had stopped appearing on your desk the day after your last little “date” with Spider-Man. Though you doubt there was any correlation, you couldn’t help but wonder why all of a sudden he would stop after what was about two or three weeks of nothing but notes after notes of apologies.
“He probably realized that you aren’t going to forgive him and decided to finally give up.” Mj’s voice sounded through your phone speaker, lying next to you as you laid on your stomach on top of your bed. Checking over your new manicure you had just received that morning, before letting out a huff as you dramatically dropped your head down on the mattress.
“Can we stop bringing him up? I don’t need reminders of his existence, not like I didn’t have enough reminders before…” You grumbled, you're sure if she was there with you she’d roll her eyes at your theatrics.
“I feel like we talk too much about you two.” She teased, the end of her sentence trailing off in a chuckle.
“Yeah because now that you're dating Peter, I can’t tease you about how you act like a nervous wreck around him anymore.” You shot back, picking your head back up and raising your brow, your smirk evident in your tone.
“Don’t be bitter that I got a boyfriend before (N/N), I’m sure spidey will ask you soon enough.” Your cheeks flared as your best friend tease, despite you starting it first you couldn’t help but feel yourself becoming a bit more shy at the mention of Spider-Man. You know not to take it to heart though as you let out a small laugh.
“Hey aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for that date right now.” You point out, having remembered that she mentioned to you during your last class together that Peter was planning on taking her to some movie after his photography club.
“Oh shit- you’re right! I got to go, I’ll text you later!”
“Okay bye have fu-aaaand she hung up, welp.” You drop your head on your bed once more after grabbing your pillow to place underneath you. Deciding taking a nap would be better than spending the next few hours doing something else, too tired from school to even attempt to watch a movie or tv show, let alone read or do homework. A sigh escapes through your nose, closing your eyes as you snuggle against the pillow, waiting to succumb to your own exhaustion. The white noise of your air conditioner running in the background lulling you to sleep.
“Maybe this is too on the nose…” Miguel mumbled to himself as he glanced down to the wrapped item in his hands, trying to compose himself as he stands in front of your dorm room, gathering the courage to knock.
It was almost embarrassing, that he was going to grovel at your doorstep in order to get you to even look at him again. He was already bruising his ego enough with the countless apology notes that you didn’t even bother to glance at for longer than a second before tossing them, let alone read. Still despite his… complicated feelings towards you, he’d rather you bruise his ego then anyone else.
His eyes came back to stare at your room number that was etched into your door, before nervously shifting his weight from one foot to the other.
You were a smart girl, a very smart girl. Miguel knew that. So he knew he was potentially playing with fire with his apology gift, he knew more than anyone else how your brain worked, he knew that you could take one glance at it and all the pieces would fall in place. He just hoped that for one, he would wave away any suspicions that you might come up with. Worst case scenario you outright declare him as Spider-Man, but then what? You weren’t one to tell secrets, you weren’t money or fame hungry so you weren’t going to go off and tell the media for a check.
Miguel shook his head, trying to shake away all the possibilities that were now coming to the forefront of his mind. Close his eyes to take in deep breath before opening to them once again to stare at your door.
‘If I keep thinking about it, I’ll end up walking away, just knock damnit.’
Finally, with a sharp exhale through his nostrils, he brings up his enclosed fist to tap lightly on your door. The edge of lips pulling downward after not getting any confirmation that you heard his knocking. After another louder knock, his ears finally picking up the faintest of annoyed groans, making his tensed shoulders slip down just a few centimeters.
Miguel thanked whatever dumb constructor decided to not give the ancient dorm building doors peepholes, because if they did, he knew you wouldn’t have opened the door for him. That’s why he stuck his foot out to act as a stopper, preventing you from closing it in his face once you realized who had decided to interrupt your short lived nap.
What a relief to be able to see your face up close with the mask on to counsel his. Despite the fact that your fake polite smile quickly melted away from your face once you realized who was at your doorstep, leaving a scowl to come and take its place. Miguel barely had time to open his mouth before your frame was once again covered by the wooden door, his school assigned leather shoes certainly getting scuffed from it hitting the side of them. Not even wincing as you attempted to push his foot out with resting your weight against the door.
“(L/N), Come on. It’s been weeks, you can’t keep ignoring me. Just… I-I know I fucked up okay? You were trying to be civil with me and I… Look I’m sorry okay? I’m sorry.” His free hand came up and pushed against the door lightly, not enough to knock you off your balance or anything but enough to peak his head through the door to meet your glare once more. “You know more than anyone else that I don’t do serious apologies. Just hear me out. You’ve-You’ve already got me begging here (L/N), to just be in the same room with you so I can admit I’m an asshole. You don’t have to forgive me, just hear me out! Please-“
He was able to squeeze himself through the crack of the door, closing it before him and leaning against it as he attempted to catch his breath from his babbling, chest raising up and down rapidly as his pleading eyes turned a bit more intense, you took a step back and crossed your arms over your chest, letting out an irritated huff as you kept your eyes on him.
“Get out O’Hara-“
“I’m tired of you ignoring me, what do you want me to do, huh!? You and I are too intertwined into each other’s lives for you to ignore me forever. You know that-“
“Unfortunately.” You grumbled under your breath, rolling your eyes a bit. Miguel, now standing up straight, took a step towards you, a hand flying to his chest as usually narrowed and bored eyes suddenly turned wild and frantic almost like a confused puppy.
“I-“ he paused, letting out a huff, before lowering his voice down to just above a whisper. “I’m not going to leave until you listen to me please just-“ He stutters, taking another pause as his eyes flutter shut tightly, you haven’t even noticed that his eyes were turning glossy and red until he opened them again, had you ever seen Miguel cry before? Well if you hadn’t, this might be a first for you both. “Please (Y/N).”
The use of the first name between you both was rare, you had been in more near death situations then you’ve heard your first name uttered from Miguel’s lips. So hearing it with such… desperation… it made your heart jump up to your throat. Your eyes never leaving his as he took another step towards you and… oh my god… is he kneeling?
“Please I-“ He choked out, the wetness that was threatening to spill out from the corner of his eye finally came down, his hands reached out to yours in desperation, you were too much in shock to think about pulling them away as you blinked down at him almost stupidly. “I can't… take it anymore. I feel like I’m going mad.”
He was being completely truthful with that statement too. He was jealous of his super powered alter ego from getting more attention from you then he was just as himself.
You finally pull yourself back into the current moment, clearing your throat as you shake yourself to help gather your words, neither of you noticing during the whole ordeal that Miguel’s apology gift had landed a few feet away from the door. Tugging at his hands as a signal to get up and off the floor. “O-okay, okay fine. Just-get up Miguel, Jesus…”
You wanted to keep holding onto this grudge of yours, but how could you when you had brought a man who is twice your size and four times your ego down to his knees? Reducing him to nothing more than a crying begging mess. Simple answer, you couldn’t. Whether it’s simple petty or if you felt like you were truly ready to hear him out, it honestly didn’t matter to you anymore. It’s clear from his breakdown that he had suffered enough.
He let out the biggest sigh of relief, sniffing a bit as he finally brought himself back up from your floor. A large hand of his coming up to wipe away a few lingering tears of frustration once he was up on his feet again. A silence fell over you both as you gave him a few seconds to collect himself properly before he could start explaining himself. Finally, with a clearing of his throat, bloodshot eyes met yours.
“Look, I know that… we haven’t been anything more than tolerant of each other… but I should have never,” his hands went to find yours again, grasping tightly as if he was afraid that you’d disappear in front of him. “Ever. Said that stuff to you. It was… too much even for us, if I could take it back, I would. I have no idea what snapped in my mind to say such vile things to you, it was wrong, it was stupid-so stupid-and I regret it. Regret it more than anything I’ve ever done in my life. You don’t have to forgive me, I don’t expect you to. Hell, say the word and I’ll walk out of here and I’ll disappear from your life forever. “
You have honestly never felt so speechless before. Miguel has never made you feel so speechless before.
“But god do I want you to forgive, to take those words back. I'll do anything, and when I tell you that I’ll do anything, I mean anything.”
You couldn’t help the breathless chuckle that escaped your throat, uneasiness bubbling up in your lower gult, despite laughing being your first reaction, you could tell he was all but joking. Your tongue stuck out to lick your suddenly dry lips.
“I can tell you’re being quite… erm, serious, so,” you pause, inhaling the tense air in hopes it’ll help calm your nerves, “I accept your apology.” Miguel took a deep breath to keep himself from turning into a babbling mess again, he could feel that heavy pressure on his chest filling up, he could finally breathe agai-“but I don’t forgive you.” He could feel his airways clog back up, he felt like he was blue screening as his ears heard the words but his mind didn’t want to accept it. He wants to do nothing more than to grovel at your feet again for you to take those words back.
But he couldn’t, it made him a little happier to know that there is something he can build off of, still as he finally was able to drag himself out from your room after putting on the facade of countenance , he felt the need to release all his pent up emotions out. He wanted to cry till his tear ducts stopped working, sob till his throat felt raw. But he couldn’t get himself to do it, his body simply wouldn’t let him, refusing to undo all of his years hiding his emotions more than he’s already done in your room, you're the only one who could make him feel again. What was that book his class started reading last week?
He felt like he had no mouth, and he had to scream.
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