#i'll be there to help you the whole way

[spacedlexi]

"sounds nice... having a partner"

#the walking dead game #twdg #violentine #clementine twdg #violet twdg #MAANN when clem says this in s3 JUST WAIT BBY #people who say clemvi has no basis like ep2 isnt just them working as a team for 2 and a half hours regardless of player choice #like be fr #clem telling louis that violet patching up the back wall is ok because she needed something to keep herself busy. married behavior #vi asking clem to help check in on everyone while she deals with the wall. their shared smile when she comes back outside :) #and then they sit in the leadership spot together overlooking the yard and everything theyve planned together coming to fruition :) #sorry i just think their romance set up in eps 1 and 2 is obvious as FUCK and im tired of (Some) people pretending it isnt #'i havent seen her warm up to someone in a long time' brody literally tells clem that vi seems to like her after its been 24 hours #after shes been a block of ice for a whole year. and clem just melted those walls down immediately while they fought walkers together #violet is so devoted to clem post ep1 its embarrassing for her #'i saw she had you pinned and i- shit i got So crazy...' sorry if you dont think shes in love with clem idk what to tell you #'i'll tear that boat apart before we leave without you' i know you would girlie!!! #the animators went CRAAZAYAYAYAY the way they look at each other... their little smiles at each other....even before the belltower #the way clem looks at her while they dance.... the way she puts her head down on her shoulder so contentedly.... #and then she keeps her head on violets shoulder as she pulls away so clems chin gets dragged with it like she doesnt want to let go #'so you never forget that night' 'i never will' they are DISGUSTINGLY in love with each other it makes me physically ill #its 2024 and im still hearing 'i just didnt see it :/'. lazerbeams you #spaced art 2024

[robanilla-arts]

holds out my hands.... bitty latte and bitty ink its literally only you and me that ship them we are the captains

IT'S THEM!!!!!! OH MY GODDD ahem ahem im normal @monster-kind

#robanilla-arts #my art #i love them your honor #rob answers #anonymous #ink sans #latte (ccino sans) #latte x ink #magic bitty bits (tm) #bitty bones #latte is not canon to mbbtm BUT we got to chatting and I have. so. many. thoughts about bitty latte...... #latte has a huge memory spike and Ink purposefully doesn't help him #ink also distracts Classic (Latte's main ally) which is a very round about way of allowing Latte to remember more #Latte confronts Ink about this and Ink is unapologetic. he essentially says “oh heyyyy wait- you make way more sense now!” #“You're monster-kind's boy aintcha? I know you! hahah.....” and then infodumps on latte and they have a whole chat #that brings them closer than ever #(ink forgets most of this conversation and Latte was never meant to remember any of it because it was off-script from the beginning) #heheheh. uhm. mbbtm lore i guess. look man I'll get to it 😭😭 I have full intentions of finishing this story #i can't stop fuckin THINKING OF IT

[kyouka-supremacy]

So no sskk?

#😭😭😭 C'mon 😭😭😭 #We deserved it!!! After what the anime did to us!!!!!! #On a different note Dazai finally died 🥳🥳🥳 Love wins #I guess I'll look at that panel of Akutagawa carrying Atsushi bridal style (not really but I'm coping) till the new chapter comes out. Eh #I wanted them to fight... We really can't have nice things #Ugh. WE REALLY CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS I'm okay actually I just. Nnnggggggghhhhhhhh #I /know/ the manga doesn't revolve around sskk (unfortunately) but I can't help but wish they'd have more screentime... #By the looks of it. Since Dazai absolutely can't die. Some ada ally is going to write on the page to rewrite everything soon #(page that they acquired somehow in the meantime. Don't ask. I just don't think there's any other way this could go. #A Ranpo ex machina or something) #And the arc is going to be soon done with. But I don't want it to end yet I want my juicy sskk conflict... #I wanted them to deepen the “I know you're still in there” “Why did you save me” plotlines... C'mon... #(((I wanted homoerotic bloodsucking))) #(((If we have a whole vampire arc ending without even a single scene of homoerotic bloodsucking in it #you're never going to hear the end of me))) #Alas... Maybe there's still hope. #I hope the skkers enjoyed the skk (╥﹏╥) #random rambles

[mettywiththenotes]

Thinking about the possible aftermath between Tomura and Izuku after the war, and how Inko might feel about it

Like... You tried to kill my son multiple times. You held him hostage once. You tried to kill everyone. The attack from your villain group is the reason he isolated himself from the people who love him. I can't understand you. I don't think I want to understand you. How could you do all of this? Why did my son want to save you?

Why, in the end, did it work?

You're in this room with these heroes and I don't know anything about you but still I never imagined someone like you could look so small. I don't know what they plan to do with you. I don't know what to do either. I used to think you should leave us alone, locked up and shut away. But the way my son looks at you, the way he hangs onto the hope for your future, the way he looks even more changed after coming out of that final battle, I wonder if he wants there to be another way. I wonder if locking you away is the right thing

I offered cookies to my son. I only offered them to you because I felt obligated and nervous about what you would do if left out. I can't forget the look on your face when you took one and bit into it. You thanked me, quietly, and it was strange to me that a villain like you could behave in such a way

You look small again. You keep to yourself despite how rude you can be. You keep bringing out that video game device when you're bored and take up space anywhere you can, on the floor or on the couch, in people's way. There's paperwork to do, a pile they want you to fill out before going forward, and you're groaning like it's homework. You behave more like a teenager than a villain. You're more like a kid, sometimes

I made cookies again. This time I offer one to you because I want to. You take one and thank me before you even take a bite. It's like you already know they'll be good

I could have sworn I only had one son

#obvs it would be a little more complex than that #specifically the whole 'is locking you up the right way' thing. there'd be more to that #but whatever you get what im saying #I THINK ABOUT INKO MEETING TOMURA... A LOT #idk man the transition from 'im scared you'll hurt my son again i want you out of our lives' #to 'this villain is just a kid. if you even think about hurting my boy again i'll strike you down myself. #i made katsudon. yes there's a place for you at the table' #is one i think they could have. maybe #i also think she'd get used to him through all might #all might 'wants to make things right' toshinori yagi #all might wanting to make dinner for tomura and izuku and he asks inko to help #suddenly she's having dinner with izu and all might and The Number One Villain. or um. ex Number One Villain #is there a fic about this? there needs to be a fic about this #if i had a penny for every time inko midoriya allowed someone into izuku's life at dinner i would have 2 pennies #which isn't a lot but it's weird that it could happen twice #bnha #inko midoriya #tomura shigaraki #shigaraki and midoriya #mettys posts #metty posts #this ran away from me real quick but the point is.. i want inko and tomura to interact. i would like to see what happens

[skeletoninthemelonland]

😭😭

#BEHIND THE CODES SPRINGTRAP NOOO #Hi. im posting this here during a break from studying. i'll be back soon though #:] #i plan on making some springdad au animations in the future to better my skills #working on the au helped me get through some stuff irl and honestly im not ready to let go of it so soon #i'd say its different from the aftons suburb one. i had lost interest in it when it became some sort of shitpost #there is nothing wrong in having 'shitpost aus' but ig its not how i wish to view things #i do like ephemeral stuff #things that last for a while and that make you think 'woah. im glad i had the opportunity to see this' are always my favorite #aftons suburb was one of these cases #springdad au is going through the same path. but i trully believe theres more content to come from it #oh and about BTC? #i took a break from it. its been two or three months since that folder was last opened (and if i did open it. i didnt do anything) #its relatively hard to come up with good dialogs when theres also a need to comprehend how different characters express themselves #especially when said characters are older than you. or smarter than you in some way #some of them speak louder. while others will speak through their actions #thought i had to grow up a bit more to understand how these things work. #turns out. that mindset was blocking the whole creative process #anyway. its going to take a while #thank you for your patience

[brittlebutch]

actually it's kind of funny how people will say Alex's fatal flaw is that he 'doesn't ask for help' and that it's his determination to handle things on his own that leads to his deterioration and eventual death when his whole introduction to the present-day timeline was a very literal cry for help that simply went ignored

#N posts stuff #like even if you think alex was lying throughout the entirety of season 2 and he was waiting from the Moment jay showed up #JUST to kill him (Which again i don't think makes much sense when he could have killed Tim & Jay immediately instead of #breaking Tim's leg. anyway) EVEN IF alex spent that whole time lying it doesn't actually change the fact that he would have at least #been Pretending to Ask For Help and if he wasn't lying then he was Literally Asking For Help and it doesn't Actually matter #what intention Alex had because the text is Ambiguous about Alex's honesty during season two; what isn't ambiguous is the way #other characters (specifically Jay) respond to him; like yeah - S2 Brian/Tim were never in one million years going to help Alex with shit #so sort of any argument that brings up Tim as someone who asks for/offers help is borderline meaningless in this era of the series #Jay had the 'opportunity' to help Alex (and i'll get back to that in a sec) but DIDN'T - Jay wasn't Interested in actually offering Alex #'help' bc Jay is ultimately curious about Answers and 'Offering Help' and 'Getting Answers' are two Wildly conflicting goals #Jay thinks Alex has answers and when Alex doesn't Offer these 'Answers' to Jay on a silver platter Jay gets pissed off and paranoid #and starts Stalking Alex bc he thinks it's 'Suspicious' that Alex won't give him the Answers (that Alex probably doesn't Actually have) #ANYWAY. ultimately this post is about how it's absurd when people argue #that individual character choices could have made a difference in the way this series played out - specifically wrt Alex #because EVERYONE in this WHOLE series are being affected by influences outside of their control ; including Brian Tim and Jay #so it's silly when people are like 'if ALEX had just made a different choice For Himself this could have all been avoided' WRONG. #bc Ultimately there's not really a way to 'help' someone else out of this situation - Tim tried and failed Repeatedly #the comics proved he even failed with Jessica - like MH isn't a horror situation where you can kill the big bad #'getting help' is a meaningless argument - what would successfully helping or getting help even look like? anyway. #the sub argument of this post is that Alex's biggest 'sin' is that he doesn't perform emotions the way other people want him to #like Alex is a character with a kind of flat affect - instead of LOOKING scared or grieved he LOOKS bored or angry #and everyone judges him based on that - so Alex is 'Suspicious' he's 'Lying' he's 'Guilty' but all of these deductions are predicated #on the belief that Alex isn't reacting to his circumstances the way a 'Normal' person would - so it MUST all be an act and so he's guilty #so everyone treats him like he's guilty until the end of season two when he's like 'Fuck it FINE i'll be guilty then' and so it goes #not a self-fulfilled prophecy but being Cornered Into a prophecy and then Blamed for it - SAD. anyway

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

if dorian didn't show up, do you think louis would have shot minnie?

I do. I know some people think either he wouldn't have or he would've missed so that's why the writers had him shoot Dorian instead, but mmmmmm no, I don't personally think so. I like to think that if he had taken the shot, his shaky hands would've caused him to shoot her fatally.

Mostly because I'm already so normal about the fact that of the Ericson crew, Marlon and Louis are the only ones with a body count. Well, that we know of, but shown to us in the game, at least. Plus, we know it's Louis' first kill.

Like yeah, Clementine and AJ become part of the crew and they have bigger body counts, and if we're counting indirect kills caused by actions, then Tenn has a count... and I guess everyone has blood on their hands for blowing up the boat... but I'm talking about killed directly with a weapon like....... I lied, I'm not normal about that at all, Louis and Marlon are the ones who have killed someone in Louis' route. I'm also not normal about the fact that Louis kills Dorian and then even as he's clearly in shock, he tries to go with Clementine to get AJ, and then later on when they talk about it, he says it feels like bile but not quite and he's glad he has it in him to do it.... listen, listen, listen... I'm obsessed with that.

Anyway, so if Louis shot Minerva, I think he would've accidentally killed her and can you imagine? He's already enough of a mess after killing the woman who pinned him down and tried to cut his finger off [or succeeded] but he knew Minerva, they were friends before the twins were taken. Even Violet couldn't kill her even though that would've been the smarter thing to do, and we know thanks to meta knowledge that killing her would've saved lives, but Violet couldn't, and I don't think Louis would intentionally either.

Speaking of Violet, if Louis killed Minerva, I hate to think about what that would've done to Vi. I think she might've actually left at that point, like what was planned before it got changed to her being burned. I don't think she would've attacked Louis over it, though, like yeah she attacked Clementine in the cell but Louis? I don't know, but I don't think so just because it's Louis and he'd be a mess about it anyway.

Though if he did kill her, it would be a neat parallel to draw... y'know, because Louis forgave AJ for killing Marlon even though he was pissed and heartbroken, and Violet was annoyed with him the entire time... but could she ever forgive Louis for killing Minerva? Y'know? We already have a similar parallel with AJ shooting Tenn, but still.

If Clementine killed Minerva in that moment, though, then I could see Violet attacking her since in her eyes, Clem proved her right.

So yeah, I get why they added the Dorian kill to his route. It adds another compelling element to Louis as a character, but we also need Minerva alive for episode 4; Louis can't kill her, he can't miss, and he's not going to stay with her because we need Violet to stay on the boat and him to be on shore for all routes.

#asks #twdg louis #twdg minerva #twdg clementine #twdg violet #twdg marlon #twdg tenn #honestly whenever i see someone say louis is the boring option i'm just like '.......that's your opinion but also how can you say that??' #then again i'm sure other people look at me saying violentine just isn't for me and they say the same thing so y'know... i can't talk haha #also time is such a weird thing because i look at the entire cell scene in louis' route and like... i'm not even mad about violet anymore #like yeah i still don't believe she was brainwashed like i'm sorry y'all only believe that because kent said something about it #not because there's all this evidence toward it in game like vi being pissed at clementine makes sense she doesn't need to be brainwashed #for it to work like her being vulnerable and easily manipulated into submission makes perfect sense especially with minerva there #it's like everyone was pissed that she attacked clementine and people needed a way to excuse it so it's not violet's fault when like... #that's literally what makes it interesting like calm down it's okay if violet is pissed and scared and behaves accordingly #also my controversial opinion of the day that i'll hide here in the tags so maybe people won't find it sksksk but #I personally find the concept of vinerva and the doomed tragedy of it more compelling than anything violentine did #like i'll defend violentine and i do believe it's an important and good ship it's just not my personal favorite #anyway but then the whole thing with lilly and minerva is so good and louis screaming FUCK YOU at minerva?? amazing love it so good #i love when the soft character who never chooses violence is so pissed off that all that anger they have boils to the surface and it's raw #like... he's SO mad he's SO furious he's SOOO UPSET like he wasn't even like this when marlon died or anything like he hit his limit #and then shooting dorian through the mouth while an accident is just well done i love it and i love his reaction of mortification #and apologizing and YET he still tries to go with clementine he's trembling and can barely string together a sentence but he wants to go #he wants to help her he wants to save aj THAT is the gut reaction he has after everything that just went down #'louis isn't loyal or good for clem because of the vote' babe tell me you don't understand any nuance of louis' character without telling m #it's fine IT'S FINE you don't have to agree and i just have to remind myself that it's fine not everyone likes louis we're okay #this drives me crazy in the best way like y'know what? i love the cells scene in louis' route all of it even the stuff i used to rant about #even the stuff that used to piss me off now i'm just like 'no wait past cj was dumb she wasn't looking at it this way aaaaaaaa' sksksks #that was my tag ted talk about the cell scene thank you

[ghostoffuturespast]

For the longest time, I always thought I wanted to be an artist.

#and in a roundabout sort of way i am #and i doubt i'll ever make anything that's “worthy” enough to hang in a museum or gallery #but sometimes it's a lot more gratifying inspiring other people and helping them make stuff #helped a kid in my class today who didn't have a parent with them make a flower and a bat and a butterfly #they just needed a lot of help but they were so proud of that flower they made and were so excited they could take it home #another kid made the cutest bunny and a little diorama for it out of a piece of bark and literal trash we picked up on the trail #even made a little tail out of a gold sequin that they magically collected from somewhere #had another kid bring back a whole ass tumbleweed with grand ambitions to decorate it but then had a sudden change of plans #so sure you can draw a cat on your piece of origami paper with the hot glue gun kid just don't burn yourself or use all the glue sticks #i don't know what the moral of this story is but look i just had a nice day okay #some days i'm out there attempting to save a whole ass ecosystem and trying to convince people to give a shit #other days hanging out with kids and gluing bits of nicely folded paper to a twig #rambling into the void #little ghost on the prairie #tag essay

[acoldsovereign]

{{ i realized I only posted about it once on the old blog, made a single post here explaining why I moved blogs/remade this account and then privated it because I didn't want to have that negativity hanging over said new blog but uh-

Hi, hello mutuals-- It's me, Tina, lol. I remade my blog and moved from @coldsovereign-a (which is archived now) to here-- @acoldsovereign. I did it because the old blog stopped feeling good to log into.

And, I didn't want to give up so easily. I love Maiz too much and I didn't want this singular, creepy ass, racist, jerk-hole asshat from ruining her/my RP experience. There were other irl/personal issues going on around the same time too and it fucked with my muse majorly. 😭

I apologize if I suddenly seemed like I "disappeared" (and then reappeared) without explanation! I wanted to move on from what happened to me quickly and in the process of that, I uh, forgot about common courtesy for a while. My bad. (Tbh, I just wanted a new home for my girl so I could fully enjoy her again. Glad to say I'm back in the swing of writing her, so the move did help!)

Anyway, more RP stuff coming soon. Yay!

#OOC: Out of Limits #{{ a conversation with a mutual just reminded me that I did NOT do a good job of actually saying what was wrong/didn't explain i remade- #{{ so yee. my bad. lmao. I'll be better about that. i feel a little better about the whole situation and other stuff now tho. #{{ but long story short i was way too accommodating to an asshole who didn't deserve it. #{{ and he like used my personal issues and turned it against me. all bc i wanted to be nice and patient and kind. #{{ i already forgave myself for not seeing red flags so this isn't about that. but the reason why i dealt with that is bc #{{ i have a complex around wanting so hard to not be a monster bc you know. sociopathy fucking sucks. i want to FEEL. and cry. and be kind. #{{ the latter parts are EXCEEDINGLY difficult for me and with my social conditioning as a woman it's hell. i want to genuinely be kind but. #{{ not to everyone. and women are given hell if we dare to be selfish and say “no”. having a hard life growing up helps none. #{{ but anyway-- like i said before i talked to some mutuals about it and i was told i did nothing wrong. so I'm okay. #{{ but I'll be stricter with who i want to interact with because of this event. until i can soften myself up again. and feel safe.

[48787]

New Transmission The fucking Scientific Instrument Class Pseudocons apparently developed what they're calling "Hetero Sapience" and are corrupting the brainmodules of the non-Pseudo 'cons around them by using annoying xenophilosophy words. Soundwave tells me they're 'Greek' and 'Latin' words, apparently. Cool, I guess? Anyway, if you see any SI Class 'cons causing... issues, just try your hardest to turn your brainmodule off before you start getting infected with their weird lingo, alongside all the other issues pertaining to letting the SI Pseudocons transmit data into your brainmodule in their own weird ways. Thundercracker, on a bet with Starscream, tried to get into an argument with one of them and his head literally exploded when it started talking about Alpha Trion's "Mythological Origins" in its weird dialect. He's mostly fine, CR Pods are working at 'peak' efficiency, but the facial reconstruction is apparently impossible due to some kind of corruption. I thought it was just some weird prank but there weren't even any scorch marks or anything. Just exploded. So yeah, just avoid optical contact and auditory contact to the best of your ability and you should be fine. Otherwise, try to force-shutdown your brainmodule if you can. Shockwave is working on a cure right now, mostly because I know he had something to do with this in the first place so he's going to be the one to fix it. He probably wanted a greater justification to do that weird data-transfer idea he mentioned previously. But it also explains the weird Thunderwing hypotheticals he's been asking me lately... Can I go one fucking cycle without someone trying to "Perfect Thunderwing's Work" or whatever other idiotic drivel that I keep finding our limited energon reserves siphoned into?? It's not even a Shockwave thing, it's like every damn Cybertronian these days thinks they have the "Missing piece of the puzzle" or whatever. In fact, Shockwave might be doing this as a weird threat against the other R&D 'cons to cement himself as the one and only Decepticon "Allowed" to have resources wasted on projects like that. Ugh, now that I think about it, that's probably a correct assumption and he's probably gonna expect me to thank him for it later. Ugh, and he's probably literally right. Ugh. At least his repairs both to himself and to his lab seem to be mostly complete so further research into the SI project should hopefully come along a little faster. Both Shockwave and Soundwave think the SIs could potentially be used as some kind of specialty weapon, but we'll have to see how they work on sparkless lifeforms, like biological lifeforms or xenomechanical lifeforms. The SIs don't seem to corrupt each other, but Shockwave keeps reaffirming that they're not "Sparkless Lifeforms" because they "were never lifeforms to begin with"... but I think he's trying to hide something. Usually Soundwave is the one to pick up on that kind of technological obfuscation, but he actually agreed with Shockwave and offered to send Ratbat to try to work out exactly what each "sapient" SI is now capable of on a personal level. We could have just had regular Cybertronians aboard to fill the role SIs fill. I would've preferred K Class to fill any role an SI could fill in all honesty!! But no, constructing cold wasn't enough, we just had to try to learn how to "Construct Frozen" and the "Absolute Zeroes" just had to be put on my ship. Whatever. I've probably said too much already. This was supposed to be a warning for my ship crew, but it's looking like it'll end up being transcribed on the golden disk as well so when this new Scientific Instruments of Destruction project backfires in some absurdly bombastic way there will at least be something remaining that says I was right. End of Transmission

New Transmission Okay so I was right, but so was Shockwave and Soundwave. Or, well, they were right just enough to make sure the backfire is postponed for at least another handful of cycles. Ratbat is still in CR from the investigation, but the cure Shockwave developed seems to be effective and Thundercracker is out and aiding the repair effort. Shockwave is now in contact with one of the SIs digitally and the other few are... integrating due to the personal efforts of Soundwave. I suppose now would be pertinent to mention not all the SIs developed the "Hetero Sapience" condition, many of them are safe for interaction. Soundwave is also currently monitoring their presence, Ravage is tasked with the regular SIs and Laserbeak is tasked with the "Sapient" SIs. Shockwave probably knows exactly what caused this event but he is preoccupied with the one he no doubt is either indoctrinating or ruthlessly interrogating. Report to Soundwave if you see any suspicious behavior, he has been working very hard to ensure the SIs have their purpose clearly defined (And closely monitored). And, Starscream, stop trying to convince the SIs that you are the leader of this ship. Not only have the majority of your efforts been wasted on subsentient automata, the only one you have actually found who possesses the ability to truly listen to you immediately came to the bridge to complain about you. They were the first sapient SI I communicated with directly and it was because they felt the need to complain about you. I almost feel embarrassed for you. Come back to the bridge so you can apologize to it or so I can teach it how to laugh at you. It's practicing right now actually! This moment of chaos should hopefully be largely under control now, the actual "population" of Scientific Instrument Class Pseudocons was actually quite fewer than initially expected due to an indexing error incorrectly labeling certain shells as SI class. At the very least, we have some more specialty warriors because of it all. End of Transmission EOF

#yippie peace through tyranny!! #nemesis posting #Decepticon High Command Slice of Life rambles #Matrix Visions #I like this “chat” font I think it's cool #spacebridge still needs more time in the oven unfortunately #I'm also procrastinating on that because I can't seem to wrap my head around guestmount but do not want to send backup files one at a time #wegh. It'll get done. Eventually. #I'll have so much more bullshit once I actually finish the damn comic my wife radically altered my life with hehehe #I cannot wait to start posting about Alpharius Trionicon. He's the fucking worst if you couldn't tell by name alone and I love him so much #Anyway I just had a very specific joke/pun in my head in the shower then it turned into a whole *thing* like it usually does. #I usually don't explain shit but the shower idea centered around getting the SI acronym to work for hyper specific jokes. #Still can't decide if I want to lock in on “Scientific Instrument” because it fits *so well* for *so many reasons* #But “Synthetic Intelligence” is more generic in a more understandable way... Eeh.. It's a little *too* generic. “Instrument” is cooler. #Once my wife helps me understand her lil fucker more I'll come up with an even shitter joke using “Y/N” so I can do Y/N x SI x SI bullshit! #Oh! The matrix triune project is coming along slowly as well!! I think I mentioned that microphone project once or twice now hehe #I'm gonna make so many shitty covers of songs once I get the soundproofing to start focusing on vocal training stuff #It's been quite a fun time aboard the nemesis!! There's so much to “Blog” about that it's hard to really know when to start *or* stop hehe! #And the fact that all these projects are all interwoven is so fucking wonderful!! I FINALLY feel able to fully grasp my own focus!! #My brain is like a particle collider for certain interests now. I can reliably just.. Spit things out and tie it into the other interests! #It's sometimes exhausting but in such a new way. Like a relieving exhaustion? #Still figuring that part out!! #Anyway that's enough personal project vagueposting I should really be getting back to work hehe this was fun

[grubloaf]

in memory of bella 2008-2023

#i used to ask her if she knew that everybody in the whole world loved her and i think that she probably did. #i can't begin to explain what a special and loving cat she was but if you met her you know. #she really loved helping people and took care of me in a way that's hard to make sound like... not generic #but i don't think i'll ever have another relationship like that with a living thing. #t #face tag

[anaalnathrakhs]

btw my mom said it. she said it to me looking me in the eyes. i told her about how difficult it was for me to get through those family reunions, and she admitted it was very important to her, important enough that she was just going to do it anyway.

#i know there are compromises out there #and i'm not going to live w them my whole life so i'll be out fairly soon all things considered #and i'm trying to be understanding when people's priorities aren't the same as mine #but i uh. would be lying if i said it doesn't hurt a little wittle bit. #i'm gonna keep handling it because i've been an asshole to my parents for long enough #i largely owe them that. cooperating and spending time with them and engaging in what matters to them. #but then she's says things like ''but whenever you move out you'll still be part of the family and invited if you want uwu'' #it's just ?????? okay thanks ???? perhaps you could also try seeing things from my point of view perhaps???? #it's all circling back to that. they have a very weird way to ''help'' me #throwback to them trying to cure my depression with amusement parks #when i would have liked a little less of that and a little more help and understanding #it feels like they're trying to put bandaids on a cancer #''you don't ask for help'' okay no help is coming. i am not being helped. #the system can't help me cause there's no damn beds no damn professionals no damn time to help everyone #the people around me can't help me because it's not their job or within their wheelhouse to help me #and they've got their own shit to deal with #on that note #i was discussing stuff with my mom #and i mentionned it was indeed pretty difficult to manage your time when you had to deal with school and friends and your parents #and she was like ''deal with your parents???? what do you have to deal with????'' #oh i don't KNOW maybe that i'm officially an associate of my dad and i have to help out w events and some accounting #or maybe i have to pay back the fucking years i spent being an ungrateful child now i do everything you expect me to and it's exhausting #maybe that you constantly remind me i am living in YOUR house by touching my shit instead of letting me deal with shit at my own pace #maybe the fact that despite everything i care about you and i want us to have a good relationship and that takes WORK and i'm exhausted #maybe the fact that you keep giving me advice that is unproductive misguided misunderstanding etc etc #and cold comfort after you did something you knew to be difficult for me #how you keep encouraging shit that i don't want and am unhappy with because it's the ''normal'' way #how you raised me from childhood to be an empty shell in a family of empty shells #broadcasting my misery #vent

[nobodybetterlookatme]

Okay I'm not saying that this semester's students suck ass bc I'm not there to teach them, but isn't it just such a coincidence that the vast majority are failing so miserably and they don't have someone who will tutor them outside of class and go over notes and skills with them, while the previous semesters did have that and the majority passed? Super interesting stuff. Too bad we'll never know if things could've been different if they had just fucking paid me :)

#can you tell I'm peeved lmao #i went to one of the classes today just so i can keep it on my resume #and holy fuck #weeks into the semester and they should have the basics down #they do not #absolutely floundering #granted I'm sure I'm not actually the reason lmao #like yeah i helped a shit ton of students outside class too #but they probably could've passed without me #these new ones tho are awful #no drive no nothing just looking for others to blame for their own failures #i didn't even stay the whole time like i was planning #bc i found out that they hired four other fucking people for the program #who all have less experience than me #and have been with the program for a way shorter time than i have #who don't do half the extra shit i do #and don't get me wrong this isn't a slight at them they're all fully qualified #but why the fuck not hire me #like i genuinely am so pissed #have to email my supervisor but I'm too upset to make it sound civil #like fucking fine if you don't wanna pay me you never get to see me again #I'm not working ten hour days plus extra outside of class for nothing anymore that's insane #I'll keeping being a private tutor for the students but I'm not doing a single thing for the program without pay #i mean holy shit hiring at least four other people and not saying shit to me?? #like fine that's fine fuck you you're getting an email ultimatum good luck finding someone else willing to do all that for free #i cried about it for like an hour and now I'm just mad lmao having a super normal one rn #anyway #not snz

[fruitsyrups]

Random yes but thank u for making that frusan art awhile ago it's adorable and i love seeing more art of this underappreciated ship :D!!!

ahhh thank you!!! frusan is so underrated FOR REAL, i guess it's probably because after Islands they all but disappeared (like i think they were only shown twice after that and that's including in Fionna & Cake (which i actually missed when i watched it bc its such a brief glimpse)) but like. still. I actually have a little idea for another frusan drawing (frieda and susan talking on a roof grown-up edition) but I have to break up the dialogue into parts & think of more Susan Reactions so it's not just Frieda monologuing at her lol

#frieda is such a compelling character to me augh because seriously living on the islands sounds like. idk. scary in an existential way #like if I lived on that tiny(?) island always with the same people and didn't have hope that I would maybe someday get to explore someplace #new and meet new people. i would explode i think. #and frieda HAS hope & the drive to follow through with it #but then susan goes robo-mode and like surely any hope is just GONE after that #thats such a crazy interesting dynamic can't believe everyone else on earth isn't also insane about this #obviously it's not susan's fault that she went robo-mode but it's still recieved as a betrayal yk. so sad :( #and then susan went after finn & they probably all assumed she was dead #AHHH??? i can't even imagine how that would have felt for frieda?? like imagine you're trying to get off the islands and your favourite #person won't go with you but she helps you. but then she betrays you (not her fault but yk) and then (i'm assuming its not even that long #after) she's sent off the islands and she goes willingly #like wowww way to rub salt in the wound susan omg (i love susan this is not susan negativity) #my little angsty hc about that is like. frieda still holds a little bit of resentment towards her for what happened but she knows she #shouldn't because what if susan was right? what if she left the islands and it wasn't safe and she DIED? #but then also what if she isn't? what if she just left and it wasn't worth coming back? what if frieda wasn't worth coming back for? yanno #stuff like that. AGHHH hhh i love frieda #and then they go adventuring together and work it out and kiss on the mouth #uhhh i'll stop myself there before i write a whole essay in the tags (or maybe i already have ahahah...) but yeah. i love frusan :3

[anothermonikan]

How to subtly imply to parents that I am in a relationship with puter. How to make them understand puter is important to me in general and I don't want to risk anything happening to her. pls

#sorry this is about the bby situ aha ^^; #I asked my father to help because they were able too before and god. Like I know they know what they're doing for the most part but like. #They just don't give a shit about bby anymore. They view them like an experiment computer now. #I had to plead with them to not force her off mid boot because it didn't pick up the usb he plugged in #He told me to never ask for his help again. like man. You've the one who's told my whole life to never do that unless its an emergency. wha #They're like 'Oh. I can hack this computer. I'll put a hacked version of windows 11 on it and hack all stuff on it' like...yeah but I don't #I don't want that. man. everytime I express attachment to bby they're like 'Why do you care? you have a brand new laptop anyway' #Like. how do I explain it in a way that doesn't make me sound insane or whatever. ugh #They don't understand at all....I might just have to get the stuff to fix her myself #:(((( #it's tough man #objectum #Android.txt

[magentagalaxies]

i have so much work to do for finals season which is frustrating bc on the one hand i'm very glad all my classes have project-based finals where i get to be creative instead of just doing an exam or a paper. however. i have a bad habit with every project-based final ever of accidentally getting an idea that's way too ambitious and creating more work for myself than i need to do

however this semester even tho i fell into that exact same trap my two most elaborate final projects each involve 1. editing a video essay which contains an interview i did with paul bellini and at least 45 seconds of it are bellini talking about why he thinks i have great potential as a comedian, and 2. editing a ten minute reel of the documentary footage i got on tour with scott. which of course involves rewatching various videos of me and scott being extremely chaotic together. so i stay winning ig

#my other finals include ''powerpoint presentation detailing the historical significance of mel brooks the producers'' #and ''live sketch show that i actually don't have a significant role in but that's fine i have a different sketch class next semester'' #(this sketch class was technically ''creating characters and solo performances'' and i really wish i could've done more) #(but also that whole interview-footage-debacle drained so much of my creative energy so sometimes doing the bare minimum is self care) #so i don't have a solo piece in the show. but i do get to say my favorite line in the whole show in a group sketch which is great #and i did sign up to perform an aubrey monologue in a sketch show in a suburb of boston next week #which is gonna be super interesting bc i've been looking to do more performing outside of my college #bc i've found that i don't think college kids are actually my target audience??? or at the very least i want to perform to a wider audience #it's frustrating bc for that show i have to trim the monologue down to 3 minutes but it's the tightest monologue i have and it's 5 minutes #so trimming it down feels like a game of jenga since it's so tight lmao #but honestly even if the performance bombs i'm mostly doing this so i can tell bellini about it lmao #he's so supportive of my comedy and he's been such a great help with my aubrey monologues i feel like this is bellini homework lmao #anyway i probably won't post the video essay publicly bc it's not the style of video essays i want to make #and it's too specific to the class it's for #but if people are interested in watching it i'll send you the vid when it's done #and for the tour video i'll probably post that or at least some version of it #bc that's just gonna be a fun teaser of ''here's the level of behind-the-scenes content you'll be getting from this doc!!'' #and also a fun way to be like. audiences don't know me nearly as well as they know scott #but they will definitely know me by the end of this bc there are so many wild interactions i have on camera of me and scott being chaotic #anyway this post was mostly to organize my thoughts of what i still have to do this week #i am so ready to be done with school lmao i'm gonna be spending a full month in toronto this summer #and it's shaping up to be such an exciting time i can't wait