#i'm going to watch it because i think the show is actually great

[theflyindutchwoman]

Hey! How are you holding up? Just finished the episode and I haven't really recovered. I am sad, I am frustrated, I don't really know what's happening? I thought they were mature and Tim is so dumb right now, I can't even.

And Lucy? I can't even start to imagine what she's going through. She has been so badass for the 5 seasons and this season she just gets fail after fail and loss after loss and doesn't even get a good job storyline.

So sorry I didn't reply sooner but I first wanted to take a little step back in order to fully digest the episode. As much as the waiting is killing me, I actually appreciate the hiatus for that. I imagine your feelings may have changed a bit as well since then… or that was the impression I got from our different conversations here and there. How are you feeling now? A bit better or still frustrated?

I'm going to start with Lucy. I was rewatching the beginning of season 5 and this is hitting even harder now. Not because of the pining era. But because the narrative was already showing her isolation back then. I couldn't quite put my finger on why her storyline in season 6 felt so familiar but now I get it. This is merely the continuation.

As we all noticed, the scene of Tim breaking up with her had a very similar vibe to the one at the end of 5.02. But think back of when she went to Nyla for advice about going to UC school, when she was trying to confide to Aaron who was too caught up in his own drama to hear her… or when she spent hours locked in a freezer because no one realised she was missing - besides Tim, that is. And then, there was the whole Rosalind thing where Lucy had to push through her own trauma to help Chris deal with his and help Bailey stay calm. But no one ever took the time to ask her how she was doing with all of this (on screen). They all had good reasons, by the way, this isn't me trying to paint them as the bad guys. But this still has an eerie similarity to what is happening right now. Only there has been no payoff for any of this. Yet. It didn't seem to go anywhere. Until now. Same with her career : she nailed UC Academy, something that was supposed to help her standout come promotion time… She helped the FBI on a raid, she was asked to be the acting Watch Commander, she was told that the whole station had her back… And yet, none of this paid off either. Yet. So this is a great opportunity to finally connect all the dots that have been dropped for the past two seasons and give Lucy the amazing arc she deserves. I sincerely hope this will be the case.

As for Tim… Look, the reason why I didn't want a breakup (besides the fact that I dislike this trope so much), is that I was afraid that it would cheapen the whole "worth the effort / worth the risk" speech. You can't say that and leave at the first difficulty without downplaying the whole story. So I'm glad that the writers were able to find a way to circumvent that issue by showing Tim completely unravelling. Because this isn't about him thinking Lucy is not worth the effort or the risk… This is about him thinking HE is not worthy of her. And that changes everything. For me, at least. I still get the frustration. I still wish this storyline would have been done with them sticking together and trying to work through it. But I can understand his perspective, why he thought this would be better for her. And I can see how that could make them stronger in the end. So, just like with Lucy, I hope Tim's arc will be treated properly and carefully. I need to see the payoff, the progress… I need to see them heal. Separately and then, together. It's always hard to see where a story is going when it is still unfolding… But for now, I choose to remain optimistic and hopeful. Does that help you even a tiny bit?

#thanks for the ask :) and again I apologise for not answering sooner! #ask & ye shall receive #the rookie #chenford #lucy chen #tim bradford

[mylittleredgirl]

Least favorite Star Trek character in each series?

i love all my children equally how could you do this to me!!!!

slightly more rational answer: i have been thinking about this since yesterday when i got the ask and it's like every time i think i have an answer i immediately go "oh but i love them for XYZ" and they move up in the ranks. ultimately most treks are ensemble shows and removing anybody from the ensemble makes it all fall apart!

gun to my head, though, bearing in mind that i love all of them:

tos: gun to my head it's chapel i'm afraid and i feel bad about it. she doesn't really get to grow much and the other most-static character is probably chekov and i had a massive crush on him. in 1967 when they went "you know this show should add a mop top for the teenyboppers out there" they were talking specifically about me 30 years later.

tng: i would take the bullet for real.

ds9: man i'm going through main characters and then secondary characters and then tertiary characters and how are they all so essential and good????? literally i have gone thru a list of characters and a list of episodes and am coming up blank. even the villains are fantastic. eddington is annoying but he's supposed to be and his episodes are all great. sloan himself is fun it's just what section 31 did to star trek in general that sucks. like????? there's not a single name that shows up in the credits that doesn't make me go YEAHHHHHH.

voy: if we can count recurring characters i'm saying barclay. i liked him a lot as a character in tng and but go "for fuck's sake" whenever i see "guest star dwight schultz" on the voyager credits. i dislike pretty much every earth-contact episode after "message in a bottle" so maybe i don't like voyager-barclay because he just happens to be there?? for main cast it'd be neelix shut up shut up i love him in the ensemble but sometimes when they give him his own episode it's too much.

ent: sorry malcolm lovers this was the only show that was an easy choice. like we SHOULD dig into the fact that essentially his greatest wish is to sacrifice himself and he won't be happy until he dies on the job. klingon behavior but not at all for the fun and glory of it just because he kind of just doesn't enjoy being alive???? archer is terrible in so many ways but he's also much more enjoyable to watch being terrible.

disco: this is actually a very weird show to even know who to choose from. the cast changes every year! we barely even know the bridge crew! who is interesting enough to count as a main character?? of the main title cast i'm kind of hot and cold with adira. i like them but the sheer amount of anxiety radiating off them at all times makes me tense up whenever they come on screen. (i just realized it's kind of ironic to say adira because they're basically a mix of wesley and ezri, who would probably make this list for most other trekkies but are two of my absolute faves.) (i will think long and hard about this)

snw: i don't know that i have enough of a read on any of them? i still haven't finished it. chapel (again?? oh no) is the one i had the hardest time warming up to early on because she seemed the most wink-y and out of place in a franchise that usually takes silly things very seriously, but i did warm up to her!

lower decks: if we can go with guest characters i hate badgey (only one on here that gathers the "hate" rating!!). i don't find him (it??) funny and i know i SHOULD find it funny which means whenever it shows up i am both not having a good time and feel bad about not having a good time. the main characters are all brilliant. gun to my head it's boims but it's a close one i love them all.

i don't even know what other shows we have i've run out of steam???

oh right picard. captain shaw??? why is such a large subset of fandom so horny for him??? and shipping him with seven of nine of all things???? is it just White Guy With Trauma because there are like. a lot of other white guys with trauma in this franchise to choose from.

#chatter post #anonymous friend #star trek thoughts #this killed me i'm going to eat ice cream straight from the container now and i didn't even get them all

[batfamfucker]

Appreciation post for 'girly girl' characters and/or shows that celebrate traditionally feminine things that girls and women are shamed for.

Characters on this list that love makeup, fashion, hair, etc. Characters that are still written as strong, intelligent, brave, etc. That told young girls that these interests are valid, they are not lesser interests. Being feminine and liking traditionally feminine things does not make them weak.

#I'm so glad I got to grow up with these girls #I was originally gonna make a post of Barbie Daphne and Stella and be like. They remind me so much of each other #And how much I love characters like them #Because I do #But then I was like fuck it let's just make a post for all the girly girls because they're so good #So here we are. In a world of misogyny. We still have them. And I am so greatful #I'm sad I missed out on celebrating my femininity and stuff like this in my teen years because of just. Stuff I was going through #But I'm glad I'm doing it now. I've been getting into makeup for the past year. Mostly eye it's so fun #The Barbie movie. Dressing up for it. Being proud makeup and skirts and dressing up like I did as a girl. God it was so wonderful #I've not felt this connected to this part of myself in years. It has helped to much #It reminded me of my love for Barbie. The movies. The fairies and mairmaids. The bright colours and fashions #And my love for all of these shows. The outfits and designs I fell in love with. The friendships and sisterhoods in all of them. #Yes it's just Rarity. I know some of the others girls also fit. But some don't as much so I didn't wanna just put a group one #And I know Kim and some others aren't as girly as others. But she's still a good example. #Her and Monique's shopping trip and other stuff is engraved into my mind. I actually think about them a lot I love them #Daphne was also a masisve awakening for me. I had such a crush on her. And the Hex Girls. #If you're wondering why other shows aren't on here. Like Trollz or Powerpuff Girls or something. It's msotly based on what I watched #And I didn't really watch them I'm sorry but feel free to add more. #We're ignoring how I mispelled mermaids. I'm not going back to change that tag. #Anyway I love women basically. We're awesome. #Barbie #Scooby Doo #Bratz #Monster High #Kim Possible #My Little Pony #Winx #Mew Mew Power

[loudlyunladylike]

The channel has 12 million subscribers now, 24 hours after the video was posted. I don’t know how to feel. -🎧

120% :')

#ask box #🎧 anon #technoblade #it's ok to not really know how to feel though #everyone is grieving over him rn and probably in many different ways #just try and let yourself actually feel whatever you're feeling it's ok #there's something very sweet and him going up like 2 million though i think #like that is 2 million people who maybe didn't watch him that much maybe saw a few clips or videos or who had heard of him - #- but never subscribed and like #like it makes me think of all the people I'm seeing in comments and such rn who are like i didn't watch him much but he was a great man - #- who made a great impact #and this is kinda like an honour to that #they aren't subscribing because they're expecting anything but it's a show of acknowledgement to him and i think that's wonderful and - #really sweet #it's what he would have wanted yanno

[procrastinationaccount]

I'm going to lose my fucking mind

#For context: I was going to make a post complaining about how lesbians don't have enough good musical theater duets #(like we have the love songs from 'The Color Purple' which're alright but doesn't match the passion or desperation present in the book imo #'Changing My Major' which is a great love song but doesn't hit that sweet duet spot #'Dance With You' and the last verse of 'You Happened' from The Prom are sweet but the girls barely get to actually sing about each other #Honestly 'Oh Well' from Love In Hate Nation comes closest to what I want but it ends on a bittersweet note unless you see the show live #If only Elphaba and Glinda were canon... #But anyway. I can't believe that there's an adaptation of The Color Purple coming in the year of our lord 2023 and this is #how they're talking about Shug Avery. Her *role model*. Lock up your *husbands*. Ick. Pfaff. #I mean they're going to be gay. You can't get around that. But Shug is the love of her life. Can we please talk about that in the character #Don't mind me I'm just over here overreacting #From what I've read one of the biggest adaptational changes in the musical is her reaction to Shug's affair. #Like in the book Shug is the one light in her life. I sobbed myself to sleep over her nosedive in self-worth when they took a break #In the musical she's just...fine with it? I get why that's more satisfying emotionally but I still think it undermines their relationship #I don't get the curse thing either. I'm a little fuzzier on this part but in the book doesn't she just leave him and she's able to thrive? #Then when he asks her to get back together she's able to just know that the worst with Shug or alone is better than the best with him? #This book man. I hate that there isn't an adaptation as devoted to the Celie/Shug relationship as the book is. #Hate that the only recommendation I've seen calling it a sapphic book was from someone who thought that Celie's letters were to her lover #I remember watching this steamy adaptation of a Shakespeare play in soph Eng and seething because they only kiss once in the 1985 movie #Ig I can't expect too much from 1985 but...it was in the book! It was one of the most important parts! They don't even live together in it! #This was all to say I wast a lesbian 'Green Green Dress' a lesbian 'Home' a lesbian 'Natasha & Anatole' a lesbian Legally Blonde finale #The list goes on #I'm sure The Color Purple (2023) will be a good adaptation and movie. I will not pop blood vessels while watching it. #Maybe I should just avoid press releases and the movie will surprise me in a good way.

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

You know, I'm glad that some of us take the step to embrace things that we like even if they're "cringe" or "objectively bad"

But perhaps we could take the next step forward and embrace the idea of reading into books/shows/movies/etc even if they don't seem deep. Perhaps we could understand that the two kinds of media aren't either "shallow and meaningless so you're weird and brainrotted to read into it" or "incredibly and profoundly deep in every way so if you don't analyze every single angle of the thing then you're brainrotted". Some media is deeper than others, but all I propose is that no matter how deep it seems it's acceptable to dig into the thing and take the media seriously instead of just assuming that because of ____ thing (such as target audience or how cringe it is) the media not deep and will never be deep and everything good about it happened on accident.

#fandom wank #i just be ramblin #I'm not putting this in any tags #I'm just frustrated that Sonic Prime is going to be remembered by the bulk of its fanbase/people who watched it as a shallow stupid badly #written kid's show where the only thing good about it that we can even consider was created on purpose and is deep is Sonadow #I'm frustrated that when people learned that sometimes the death note creators did things because it was cool and not because they were #planning for it to be some great symbolism that so many people jumped from 'death note is a masterpiece and every bit of it is meticulously #thought out the curtains are never blue' to 'pack it up guys! the curtains are just blue! Everything good about death note like that #profound relationship I like and the neat symbolism completely happened by accident and Ohba sucks as a writer otherwise' #I'm frustrated when I see people talk about 'a kid's show' as if it's not gonna be deep at all or written well *because #it's a kid's show and then turn around and complain that said show sucks and isn't deep at all (even if that's how they're choosing to look #at it and they could see the care put into the story if they didn't go into it assuming that it will be lesser and shallow and dumb based on #what it is) #I guess it's also just getting me on this random Wednesday the idea that the bulk of one's viewers determine the legacy of a piece of media‚ #no matter how close or far away they are from painting the media as it actually is or tries to bw #It's also just bleak (especially from a manga/anime standpoint) that if your work is considered profound and intellectual‚ then any reveal #of something not being deep is grounds for people to completely swap how they think of your work and how they see you as a writer #And any work that's considered 'not actually that deep' from the getgo ends up with people only engaging with it seriously saying stuff like #'I know nothing about it is purposeful or deep but I like it' #and just ends up with prevailing opinion putting down anything percieved as 'good' or 'profound' about the work as a complete fluke

[lab-gr0wn-lambs]

I kinda feel bad for the original ftwd stars, I mean it really became The Morgan Show as soon as he dropped in. But. At the same time. The Morgan Show is really fucking good.

#It also just so happened that the absolute delights that are John June Al Sarah and Wen all showed up at the same time #what the hell is this show anyway I mean the original premise was exploring what we missed at the start of the outbreak #and well that lasted about 6 episodes. And they were actually great #I watched the first 3 of those before watching past episode 1 of twd because I honestly found it more interesting #no disrespect to the first episode of twd I mean that shit is a genuine masterpiece #but I'm on season 6 now and it's like. Negan war arc but more yeehaw #and better #whosaidthat #ftwd #but yeah why does Strand keep being villainzed and why is Lucy such a sidelined punching bag and Alicia is. there. as ever #Daniel's still got stuff going on ig #I don't think Maddy's dead by the way. maybe that's delusional of me but we didn't see her die on screen so.

[aerielz]

I've watched 3 episodes of veep and thought hey I wonder what that ao3 tag looks like and I was NOT disappointed

#tww has broken me beyond what I thought it was possible #it make me a thousand times more focused as a writer but that's not the worse #the worse part is that now I like politics #I mean I always did but I'm actually like INTO it now i keep up with shit what's that about #worse I like US politics #irl and the fiction kind #and that means that I don't actually have to watch politics shows to get understand them? #anyway veep fanfic is great and it makes me wish sorkin and Co had the been at liberty to write something like that #not just because I'd get a kick of Josh being a sailor-mouth #but also bc of the possibilities #sorkin can be preachy and it was the 90s going into 911 but I think spesh the John Wells era could've gone far #rambling into the void

[paris-geller-was-straightwashed]

'hazbin hotel is such a great queer show!' haha right except it's sister show set in the same universe & made by the same person, has the main character blatantly call someone a r*tard as a way to insult them soooooooooooooo......hard pass

#but fuck disabled people amirite /s #hazbin hotel #helluva boss #tw ableist language #tw r slur #for the record the only way I know this is bc I was forced into watching hazbin + other show by my best friend #in case my best friend sees this do not trip I'm not mad or anything #I'm mostly shocked that this shit is actually popular #I found it really campy in an unfun way & full of WILDLY dislikeable characters #but whatever I'm fine to not like it on my own I don't care #but now all of a sudden it's become super popular and over on autostraddle where I venture sometimes #a fan wrote an article raving about hazbin and how it's got great queer rep in it's main female lead #and now ppl are commenting saying they're exciting to check it out and just... #like it's one thing to support shows/creators who think it's okay to just swing ableist language like that around #but what upsets me the most is a possible disabled queer getting interested FROM this article & going to watch it #only to get suddenly hit over the head with a slur against people like you that the person in the article didn't even bother to mention #because that shit hurts #I can't speak for every disabled person obviously but when people use r-slur as a direct insult around me #it's like getting smacked directly across the cheek #bc it's an easy reminder of how those people view people like you #and YES I know what I'm talking about happened in it's sister show but if they become a fan then they're likely going to watch the other on #language like this CAN be used tactfully for the record #like if it was used to show the character as a cruel person who uses slurs as such #and therefore paint them in an obvious bad-light to the audience so we better understand who that character is #but no from my memory the character just wanted to insult the other one and could've said anything #instead we have to resort to slurs like it's fucking family guy #'what great queer rep!' not to be all 'queer content has to be pure!1!!1' but folks we can do better then this

[maddy-ferguson]

literatis and rogans really be having a "who made rory feel worse" off

#gilmore girling #they both made her feel like shit. at least 90% of logan stans don't pretend he's perfect and a great boyfriend the way team jess #people do🙏 #i mean. we actually SEE logan be a great boyfriend so there's no need to pretend he is #really can't say the same about jess #but whatever i don't care. i really don't but i think it's funny that there's still a bit of a ship war going on when the truth is neither #relationship is perfect and they both make her feel awful at times the only difference is logan and rory actually grow as a couple (until #they don't. lmao) while jess...ghosts her #and yes he's 18 logan was older it's not fair whatever idc #i'm not a centrist because i do like logan better but you won't ever see me act like every single thing he did was forgivable #but i stil like him and like him with rory even though i'll say jess and rory are more compelling so i get why they're more popular #even though on other platforms it's more of an even split. but (and this is gonna sound bad) when i first watched gilmore girls i was 18 #and i was just...so over the bad boy good girl i hate everyone but you only softens with you (even though jess is barely soft with her #which i don't really blame him for like i UNDERSTAND him and i think their relationship's well written! i just don't like them together)) #like sorry i would've liked them if i had watched the show at 14 but i had...grown out of that phase #if anyone is deeply team jess i apologize pretend i didn't just say something insulting #i mean i don't think there's something inherently wrong with these tropes it's just the way it plays out for them really doesn't make me #root for them to be together. and i only liked jess after a couple viewings of the show (logan too btw because like luke says in a vineyard #valentine it really is one day we hate him one day we love him so for a while i was like...what's his deal like i really wasn't enamoured #which is why...i feel like i can be objective even though i like logan and rory better🙏) #i also didn't like rory that much by the end of ayitl lmao #this was inspired by a gifset compiling moments where logan made rory feel insecure like wow do you really wanna go there

[laesas]

its funny how different opinions can be lol. I love between us. yes, the pacing could be better (they should already be together at this point) and the sidecouples take to much screentime. thought i still love it. The deep characters, the story, winteam, the chemie, bounprem...im already sad, that its gonna end soon.

Sure!

I still do enjoy aspects of it, enough that I'm definitely going to finish the show, and I agree that WinTeam have compelling chemistry and an interesting underlying storyline (albeit paced incorrectly). I never claimed to be offering an objective opinion on whether or not people should watch or enjoy the show.

I usually come out of even my most dearly beloved shows with some thoughts on script or pacing or tonal shifts or screentime balance between characters. I have opinions literally nobody asked for on details like framing and visual motifs even down to really minute details like camera movements or lens choices! It's my day-job to think about that kind of thing!

Maybe it's a fundamental difference in the way I consume media as someone working behind the scenes - it's no more or less correct than watching a show just to watch and enjoy it, rather than pick apart and analyse it - just different! And we've clearly come to slightly different conclusions on the show based on that.

Ultimately I'm just one person with one perspective. I'm glad that it's still enjoyable for you!

#ask #anon #I didn't tag either post with “Between Us” either #so theoretically it shouldn't show up in either my own BU tag or tumblr's #Partly because most people in the tags are fans not looking for any negativity #and partly because the OP was a non-objective throwaway comment about how I personally cant stand the editing #My opinions are actually massively swayed by working in TV and being in edit suites with producers and directors #to the point where the poor editing choices make my brain go into ''work mode'' and try to fix them and its distracting lol #obviously that is an experience and metacriticism of BU that 99% of people watching BU will absolutely not have #storytelling wise - some aspects have been great #I think the conversations around consent in the first couple of episodes were great #and I (as a fellow PeeTeeEssDee GORLIE) think the way Win handles Teams symptoms is just gorgeous and lovely and wonderful #there are lots of super interesting facets that are well done and sensitively handled #but - TO ME *PERSONALLY* - That adds to the mounting frustration about how the show as a whole is put together #you get these little *gems* (especially early on) and then they're not given the breathing room they deserve #My personal opinon is that it's frustrating that Boun and Prem essentialy put their careers on hold to complete this passion project #and despite knowing that it had garnered this huge loyal fanbase over the past 3 years #between us clearly wasn't given the production budget or ground-up editorial prowess that it deserved #I don't think I'm incorrect in saying that and I dont think you're incorrect for enjoying it despite that! #strokes and folks etc etc #ultimately I am posting untagged to a blog with under 100 active followers #I have no bearing on the show at all and no sway over the fandom lmao #glad you're enjoying it! I am too! sometimes! other times not so much! #but we move we vibe!

[foone]

Look if there's one thing, just one thing, that I wish everyone understood about archiving, it's this:

We can always decide later that we don't need something we archived.

Like, if we archive a website that's full of THE WORST STUFF, like it turns out it's borderline illegal bot-made spam art, we can delete it. Gone.

We can also chose not to curate. You can make a list of the 100 Best Fanfic and just quietly not link to or mention the 20,000 RPFs of bigoted youtubers eating each other. No problem!

We can also make things not publicly available. This happens surprisingly often: like, sometimes there'll be a YouTube channel of alt-right bigotry that gets taken down by YouTube, but someone gives a copy to the internet archive, and they don't make it publicly available. Because it might be useful for researchers, and eventually historians, it's kept. But putting it online for everyone to see? That's just be propaganda for their bigotry. So it's hidden, for now. You can ask to see it, but you need a reason.

And we can say all these things, we can chose to delete it later, we can not curate it, we can hide it from public view... But we only have these options BECAUSE we archived it.

If we didn't archive it, we have no options. It is gone. I'm focusing on the negative here, but think about the positive side:

What if it turns out something we thought was junk turns out to be amazing new art?

What if something we thought of as pointless and not worth curating turns out to be influential?

What if something turns out to be of vital historical importance, the key that is used to solve a great mystery, the Rosetta stone for an era?

All of those things are great... If we archived it when we could.

Because this is an asymmetric problem:

If we archived it and it turns out it's not useful, we can delete.

If we didn't archive it and it turns out it is useful, OOPS!

You can't unlose something that's been lost. It's gone. This is a one way trip, it's already fallen off the cliff. Your only hope is that you're wrong about it being lost, and there is actually still a copy somewhere. If it's truly lost, your only option is to build a time machine.

And this has happened! There are things lost, so many of them that we know of, and many more we don't know of. There are BOOKS OF THE BIBLE referenced in the canon that simply do not exist anymore. Like, Paul says to go read his letter to the Laodiceans, and what did that letter say? We don't know. It's gone.

The most celebrated playwright in the English tradition has plays that are just gone. You want to perform or watch Love's Labours Won? TOO FUCKING BAD.

Want to watch Lon Cheyney's London After Midnight, a mystery-horror silent film from 1927? TOO BAD. The MGM vault burnt down in 1965 and the last known copy went up in smoke.

If something still exists, if it still is kept somewhere, there is always an opportunity to decide if it's worthy of being remembered. It can still be recognized for its merits, for its impact, for its importance, or just what it says about the time and culture and people who made it, and what they believed and thought and did. It can still be a useful part of history, even if we decide it's a horrible thing, a bigoted mess, a terrible piece of art. We have the opportunity to do all that.

If it's lost... We are out of options. All we can do is research it from how it affected other things. There's a lot of great books and plays and films and shows that we only know of because other contemporary sources talked about them so much. We're trying to figure out what it was and what it did, from tracing the shadow it cast on the rest of culture.

This is why archivists get anxious whenever people say "this thing is bad and should not be preserved". Because, yeah, maybe they're right. Maybe we'll look back and decide "yeah, that is worthless and we shouldn't waste the hard drive or warehouse space on it".

But if they're wrong, and we listen to them, and don't archive... We don't get a second chance at this. And archivists have been bitten too many times by talk of "we don't need copies, the original studio has the masters!" (it burnt down), or "this isn't worth preserving, it's just some damn silly fad" (the fad turned out to be the first steps of a cultural revolution), or "this media is degenerate/illegal/immoral" (it turns out those saying that were bigots and history doesn't agree with their assessment).

So we archive what we can. We can always decide later if it doesn't need preserving. And being a responsible archivist often means preserving things but not making them publicly available, or being selective in what you archive (I back up a lot of old computer hard drives. Often they have personal photos and emails and banking information! That doesn't get saved).

But it's not really a good idea to be making quality or moral judgements of what you archive. Because maybe you're right, maybe a decade or two later you'll decide this didn't need to be saved. And you'll have the freedom to make that choice. But if you didn't archive it, and decide a decade later you were wrong... It's just gone now. You failed.

Because at the end of the day I'd rather look at an archive and see it includes 10,000 things I think are worthless trash, than look at an archive of on the "best things" and know that there are some things that simply cannot be included. Maybe they were better, but can't be considered as one of the best... Because they're just gone. No one has read them, no one has been able to read them.

We have a long history of losing things. The least we can do going forward is to try and avoid losing more. And leave it up to history to decide if what we saved was worth it.

My dream is for a future where critics can look at stuff made in the present and go "all of this was shit. Useless, badly made, bigoted, horrible. Don't waste your time on it!"

Because that's infinitely better than the future where all they can do is go "we don't know of this was any good... It was probably important? We just don't know. It's gone. And it's never coming back"

#Archivist ranting

[violet-snail-sfw]

The first time I saw a trans woman was in porn. I was pretty young then, in early middle school I think. My first thoughts about trans women only existed in a sexual context, since that was the only place I saw us mentioned

The next time I saw trans people mentioned was a TV show presumably about trans people and transitioning. I didn't watch it, only saw the description because even as a kid I had already internalized the idea that it was taboo and I would get in trouble if my parents walked in and I was watching it

Eventually I saw enough TV and cop shows to see an episode with the dead trans hooker trope. It further reinforced the building idea that trans women were something else, separate from "normal" people and always on the outskirts of society

And then Caitlyn Jenner came out. At my Catholic middle school there were few kind things said about her and plenty of nasty comments, but this was the first time I saw trans people being publicly talked about

In high school my views on trans people started to fracture. On one hand, I was being pushed the idea that gender was about what's in your pants, that if you've got a dick your a man and there's nothing that can be done about it. On the other hand, early high school me had stumbled across some gender change erotica and quickly became obsessed with it. While it wasn't great representation, it was still pretty positive about transitioning. The people in those stories were always happier afterwards

I struggled to reconcile what parts of society were saying about trans people with my daydreaming about what I'd do if I woke up the next morning as a girl. Eventually I decided that it was just a fetish. I just thought it was hot, there was no way I could be trans because I was just a normal person. I wasn't weird or a spectacle for others to gawk at, I was just a person

Around that time I also met a trans person in passing for the first time. One of the trans guys at my high school was in one of the musicals that I went to because some of my friends were also in them. When I was talking to my friends about it after someone mentioned the trans guy and that he was trans. I wasn't really sure what to think so I kinda just didn't think about it. Thinking back, there were a few trans guys at my high school but I don't think there was a single out trans woman

Eventually in college I actually met some trans and nonbinary people. In some classes we introduced ourselves on the first day with names and pronouns which was my first exposure to people using pronouns other than just he/him and she/her. I had a few classes with trans and nonbinary people, including a survey of transgender studies class I took in my last semester. I had plenty of excuses for why I was taking it (I needed a few more credits to graduate. It still had room open. It fit with my other classes. It seemed interesting. I'm trying to be a good ally.)

Around this time as well I found some trans creators online like ContraPoints and Philosophy Tube (whom I had watched before she came out as trans). I was weirdly excited and interested when Odyssey Eurobeat came out as trans and I went to go listen to some of her music right after I heard. I was starting to have examples of trans people just being people. Not just porn stars or public spectacles, but people

Later I met and befriended a few trans women, one of whom was extremely open about her transness and happened to share a video which started the initial steps of my egg cracking and figuring out who I am now

If I had actually known any trans women, if the world had been kinder to trans people, if representation of trans women as people existed and was well known, I might have been able to realize who I was sooner. I would have been able to exist as myself for more than a tiny fragment of my life so far

Representation matters, both in media and in daily life. Trans people being out and open about who they are made it possible for me to realize that about myself. Please never stop being who you are

#violet's rambles #trans #transgender #transfem #nonbinary #okay to reblog

[discopaddock]

I DON'T WANNA TALK - CHARLES LECLERC

SUMMARY: charles is mad after the bad race, what can go wrong after screaming at his girlfriend?

PAIRING: charles leclerc x fem!reader

GENRE: angst with happy (???) ending

WORD COUNT: 0.9k

WARNINGS: screaming, crying, charles is mad, traumatizing childhood and parent, ENGLISH ISN'T NY FIRST LANGUAGE

AUTHOR'S NOTE: hiya, was inactive for a (longer) moment, school still sucks, inspiration is taking offence at me and history at school does kill me right now fr (we started the great war recently and watched im westen nichts neues - i hate this kind of films). anyway this was based in this request.

Charles was angry. No, he was furious.

Race didn't go well. He had to retire after Perez touched him and he ended up in the wall.

Race was good, for two laps he was even leading but then the Mexican showed up and Charles’ good race said “bye bye”.

“Charles,” his girlfriend said after they were finally in their hotel room.

He wasn't in the mood for talking. He didn't want her pity. He wanted to take a shower (another one) and scream in his pillow.

The girl was looking at him, worried. This wasn't the state she has seen him for many times. It was the first time actually.

“I don't wanna talk” he answered only and grabbed some clothes of his and entered the bathroom.

“If you’d like to-” she started but he turned around to face her with anger written on his face, panting.

“Shut up!” Charles yelled at her and entered the bathroom. She was left speechless. There were tears forming in her eyes that started falling down when she heard the slam of the door.

Oh, she really didn't want it to come back.

Life was good, great even, then those memories came to her mind, causing another session of crying.

The girl had no idea what to do.

Her eyesight wasn't so clear as she was looking for the tissues, convinced that her make up was smeared as hell.

When she finally found some in her bag, she next jumped on the bed and covered herself with the blanket.

Her heart was hurt, it didn't crack in shatters but still it hurt as hell.

She felt like that seven year old girl, who was standing in front of her father, crying because he yelled at her.

She was screamed at because of trying to make her dad come to terms with her beloved mother.

It was too much for little Y/N. It hunted her for years.

Especially now, when her and Charles were trying everything to have a baby. She was frightened she became the same as her father and her child would have to experience the same case as she had.

And now it was too much for adult Y/N.

She knew she should meet her therapist as soon as she could but she couldn't since she was travelling with her boyfriend around Asia for the next two weeks and her therapist wasn't doing online appointments.

And there she was, still lying on her side of the king-size bed covered with a blanket and still crying.

Charles wasn't aware of his girlfriend's reaction to his behaviour until he left the bathroom, all showered and with a clear mind, and heard sobs in the room.

He sighed only and went to the bed and took a seat beside the girl. He carefully took off the blanket of her face and saw her with smeared make up, red eyes and runny nose.

She didn't want to talk with him and put her head in the pillow, so he couldn't look at her.

“I'm sorry-” he started but her hushed by the pillow voice interrupted him with:

“I don't wanna talk.”

So Charles didn't talk more but kissed her head quickly and left to the living room, to give her space he knew she needed.

The next hour went, well, silent.

Y/N wasn't sobbing anymore, just blowing off her nose and coughing from time to time. Charles at the other hand was thinking about his new song and was trying to write any notes but he lacked at stave paper and at any keyboard or piano.

The girl finally got out of the bed and entered the bathroom. She grabbed some cotton pads and put micellar water on it and began to remove her make up.

It was a heavenly feeling for her, since her eyelids were sticking to each other because of the mascara.

Next she grabbed some cleaning foam and removed the rest of the cosmetics and put on the cream.

The girl left the bathroom and went to Charles who was sitting on the couch with some folded paper around.

He heard her steps and turned around to see her face.

“Ready to talk?” he asked only and she nodded, then sat beside him. “I'm sorry, truly” he said, looking into her eyes, that he loved so much. Now they were puffed and red from the crying.

“I know” she answered and hugged him like a koala. Charles wrapped his arms around her body, without saying any words.

“What happened?” the man asked, rubbing her back with his palm. “Tell me, I'm not leaving this without any explanation,” he added in a calm tone.

The girl was silent for a few moments. But then she told him only:

“Father was screaming at me for trying to help.”

Charles was speechless. He knew his girlfriend’s relationship with her father wasn't good, but he didn't know it was that bad. He never asked since her mother told him not to for the girl's mental state.

“I'm sorry, dove. I'm so sorry” he whispered to her ear, trying to comfort her the best he could.

“I don't want to be like him” she mumbled in the crock of his neck and he sighed.

“You are not like him,” he assured her. “You will never be like him,” he added and kissed her temple. “You are a better person than him, dove.”

“I love you” she mumbled.

“I love you too” she whispered back and they remained silent for the rest of the night, cuddled in each other’s arms.

masterlist

#discopaddock #formula 1 #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 x you #formula 1 x y/n #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 oneshot #charles leclerc angst #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc #charles lecrelc #charles leclerc x y/n #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc one shot

[uglyducklingofthe2000s]

Sugar Doesn't Taste Sweet - Lewis Hamilton

This is a much darker fic (imo) than any of the others, could be borderline like thriller romance. Because I'm ngl Lewis exudes a powerful man who hides a lot, including a dark side the public could not handle (at least that's how it's about to be in this fic).

Dark fic - if you don't like this or the warnings/themes make you uncomfortable. I can't stress this enough, DO NOT READ THIS

Summary: He offered to be her sugar daddy and she figured what harm could it do? Lewis Hamilton is a man with more money than she could ever wish to have. She just never expected how he might use it on her.

READ THESE Themes/warnings: Abduction, tying up, psychological manipulation/breaking down, sugar baby/sugar daddy dynamic initially, smut (always), literally psychopath!Lewis, sex is weaponised, not exactly a the happiest ending

No part 2 requests please - This is actually longer than I expected it to be

Y/n should've done this years ago. Ok. Maybe not years because she wasn't legal to the likes of Lewis. But she certainly wishes she'd done it earlier.

"Obviously we all know there's some sort of arrangement between Lewis and y/n. We all know it and they're not exactly subtle but maybe we should all start placing bets for how long it's going to last. I don't think it'll be long before she's not showing up in the paddock." A F1 TikToker states as y/n watches her phone and rolls her eyes.

They're right, but it doesn't change that it's annoying that they're right.

"What's that face for?" Lewis asks making her look up from her screen.

They're currently on his private jet to the next race and she's just been treated to a Birkin 30 to flaunt around the paddock. She flaunts her gifts and Lewis flaunts her. It's a beneficial dynamic for her either way.

"They're placing bets for as to when I'll not be with you anymore." Y/n sighs clicking her tongue before she smiles. "I mean I know I won't be around forever but they could at least not restrain themselves from being dicks about it."

"You'll be around long enough for them to get over it." Lewis shrugs pulling her over to straddle his lap. "They're jealous. Probably of me just as much as they are of you."

"Mmm...you think?" Y/n smiles then moving her hands down his torso as she leans in giving him a lingering kiss.

Lewis has never told her, but she really does have an addictive touch and presence. One that he's very much happy to get his hits of her as frequently as possible.

Y/n meanwhile is just enjoying having a millionaire's wife's lifestyle. Lewis is a great guy, and if he didn't come with such baggage, then maybe she'd seriously consider being in something long term with him. After all she's more than aware he's a sweetheart and a sex god and he takes good care of her. All boxes ticked. Plus there's no denying his children will be the prettiest kids ever, she'd take such pride in being in the garage as a WAG with their little kids in tow.

But reality is harsh and he does come with the baggage that gives her a headache.

Sex makes it better though.

His jet having a private cabin, though not a soundproof one, does also add to this moment being much more pleasurable.

It's an especially nice addition that Lewis is well endowed and not only that but the man was written by a woman ;). Female pleasure is at the top of his list and he gets off on it. Just that knowledge is enough to turn her on.

Hence why she's already soaked just sinking down on him, shivering at the feeling of his dick filling her beyond capacity.

"I could see you like this all day." Lewis states pushing on the bulge of himself through her stomach and taking some joy out of the sight of her eyes rolling backwards from the pleasure of the pressure of being filled.

Y/n pulls herself herself up, controlling and setting the pace while he makes sure she's taking every inch of him with each thrust. Starting to meet her part way on her way back down.

Her whimpers and clutching at him as her legs start to tremble from supporting her weight and he watchers her tummy quiver as she practically suffocates his cock with how tightly she's wrapped around him. Again pushing down on the bulge through her stomach making her actually cry out in a moan, back arching at the addition pressure mid-orgasm.

His own hand on also triggers his own orgasm the limited available space meaning it leaks out around him with nowhere else to do.

"Fucking hell." Y/n groans just exhausted. "You ever not going to leave me sore."

Lewis chuckles lightly managing to capture her in a kiss before she sighs and looks down then smiling when Lewis lifts her up off of him and begins the clean up for both of them. What a king of aftercare.

-

Y/n really made it easy to gain access to her devices, to get her login in for her apple account and see every message she sends. Lewis felt like a stalker for it but it paid off when he saw messages between her and her friend about the arrangement coming to an end.

Apparently she's saved up a lot of the money in the allowances Lewis gave her and she thinks it could keep her going for maybe even a couple years if she's smart. Not to mention she could easily sell some of the stuff he bought for her.

To say the least he doesn't think it's acceptable.

So he's not going to allow that to happen.

He asked for her to come to his place for dinner. Dates between them aren't unusual. Though it's a little unusual for him to have them at his house.

"That's a beautiful dress." Lewis smirks as he lets her in.

"Thanks. You bought it." Y/n smiles as he takes her hand raising it and getting her to spin as they walk to the dining room.

"Clearly. I have good taste." Lewis hums earning a grin before he pulls out the chair for her then tucking it as she sits.

His chef, who is under strict instructions to leave as soon as the main course is served, not even to clean up, serves them the starter earning a thank you from them both.

"So what's the occasion?" Y/n asks making Lewis look up, his dark eyes feigning innocent curiosity. "Well you've never invited me to your house for dinner before. Sex plenty of times, I've came here for a couple hours. But nothing so formal and...romantic."

"Are you saying I'm not romantic?" Lewis jokes earning a grin.

"You're romantic but it's just new." Y/n shrugs with a small smile. "Different."

"Good different."

"I'll let you know once we've finished the last course." Y/n hums which Lewis nods at.

They talk, they eat, they are served the main course. Lewis has his ears pricked for hearing the chef leave. Though y/n is too caught up talking about how she's been thinking about how they should take a trip in the next bigger gap.

"Sorry, baby. I'm just going to go to the toilet." Lewis states making her pause.

"Ok." Y/n smiles brightly looking like she realised she might've bene rambling a little.

Lewis sighs getting the cloth ready and putting on a mask. So long as he's quick and doesn't inhale any himself, he'll be safe and y/n will be his to do what he wants with.

Walking back in y/n is still just tucking in to the last of her main course.

"You know, I might be won over to this vegan diet. Your chef makes some good-"

Lewis cuts her off, the cloth doused in chloroform. He knew y/n would fight him, but even her attempt to run just allows him to knock her to the floor, already disoriented by the small amount she's inhaled. He holds the cloth over her face for a few minutes watching the tears well with the betrayal well and truly communicated to him.

She'll forgive him.

He'll make sure of it.

Eventually her body loses the fight to the toxins beating around her body, the adrenaline from her panic successfully aiding to knock her out faster.

-

Y/n coughs, feeling like her body is freezing even under what she can feel as heavy blankets covering her. She can't even begin to think about her surroundings when she shoots forward. The dinner she ate making the more ungraceful reappearance.

The splattering into a plastic bucket shocks her and her eyes open as she flinches feeling a hand rub her back. She can't move away till she's done and her stomach churns till there's nothing left there.

Then she scrambles back as the memories of what happened fill themselves in from the momentary fogginess.

"What did you do?" Y/n chokes out trying to ignore her body feeling like she's well below what temperature she should be.

"You need to calm down first. If you calm down, we can just talk. Ok?" Lewis tries to soothe but her eyes are darting around the room.

It doesn't take her long to realise that she's in a room she doesn't recognise. There's no windows and while it otherwise looks like just a normal bedroom she also can see the door is pretty heavy duty.

"Please let me go." Y/n hiccups wiping her eyes.

"You're cold."

"And whose fault is that! You drugged me! You-You-You're insane. Whatever you're doing people are going to figure it out and they're going to know! People will figure it out!" Y/n exclaims but the shouting only makes what little energy she has drain too quickly. "I trusted you."

"You'll learn to trust me again. You're better with me than without." Lewis states with a small smile.

"You're crazy." Y/n whispers curling up. "And you'll pay for this."

"You should get some more rest, it'll take a while for your body to recover and get everything out your system." Lewis states placing a heated blanket over her despite her making no attempt to comply in making it easy for him to put it around her.

He also places a kiss on her lips, and while she doesn't kiss back. He shifts leaning to whisper in her ear.

"I'm going to break you and then we're going to be happy. Both of us." Lewis states making her feel her lip quiver but she refuses to let herself cry till he's gone. Even if she's certain he'll be able to watch her. "I love you."

"You wouldn't do this if you did...You didn't even ask me."

Lewis sighs standing up and leaving the room while she feels the heated blanket being annoyingly effective in working her exhaustion into taking her back into the depth of sleep.

-

Y/n really tried the hunger strike but she's not willing to kill herself to spite Lewis, she needs to keep up her strength if she's going to figure out how to get out of here.

"You look so pretty." Lewis comments watching her eat, has he has every time he's brought her food.

"You disgust me." Y/n grumbles but there's suddenly amusement in his eyes. "What?"

"Nothing, finish eating." Lewis instructs earning a glare but she does as she's told. He clears the tray off to the side before smiling as he sits on the bed. "Do you know what I love about you so much?"

"That I'm so easily kidnapped?"

"That you're so easily touch-starved. You've got a high sex drive and even when you're here like this, I've watched you touch yourself for hours." Lewis comments stroking up her calve feeling her shudder under his touch. "And you're so desperate for someone else's touch, you can't even bring yourself to push me away."

Irritation spikes and she grabs his arms with some force, but she knows it's not enough to overpower him or prove him wrong.

"I could make you soak these sheets and you'd let me." Lewis states making her grit her teeth with annoyance. "Tell me I'm wrong and say no."

Y/n's might've been a sugar baby by trade with Lewis, but she is massively dependent on physical touch with a person. Even just with her friends and family she was cuddling and would hold hands with everyone just while walking through the street. Being so isolated socially and untouched physically is making her whole body beg for her to stop fighting Lewis just to accept his touch.

Her teeth grit with her internal battle, she's almost sure she'll shatter her teeth if she grinds them any harder.

Lewis brushes over the white cotton that's quickly growing damp in anticipation of his fingers. But suddenly he's gone and the ghost of his touch makes her gasp.

"What-I-"

"You need some time to think. I'm giving you that." Lewis states, though that's a lie. He has a plan and he needs to get something that is not in the room.

Y/n is frozen, her body tense and her brain glitching in the fact she really just let him do that. In fact she doesn't move until the door lock clangs and she flicks her gaze to him. Her eyes landing on leather cuffs and ropes.

"Are you going to make this difficult or easy?" Lewis questions making her blink but remain silent.

In fact she stays silent as he pulls off her clothes, leaving her completely naked. She's too stunned to speak but completely helpless to her body's urging for touch and need.

Before she knows it she's cuffed with arms above her head, her legs have been moved up spread with her knees tied so she can't move at all.

"I've missed seeing your body." Lewis comments watching her a little shaky and her pussy quivering as it almost drips under his gaze. "What if I just left you here like this?"

Lewis is going to make her beg. He's going to break her and then he's going to leave to really put the nail in the coffin.

Y/n wants to speak but her stubbornness would rather her take a chunk out her tongue from biting it so hard than speak like he wants.

"Remember how good I can make you feel?" Lewis states leaning down and kissing her exposed nipple hearing her throat making a noise from being her sealed lips. "Or do you need me to remind you."

Lewis is almost certain if he hadn't tied her up, y/n might even be trying to touch him. But she isn't instead she's shaking underneath him and keeping herself quiet.

"Say no and I'll stop." Lewis instructs looking up at her.

Y/n wouldn't dare, hell if he hadn't tied her up she thinks she might've clawed her way onto him.

Lewis doesn't move for a few moments, his fingers ghosting over her wetness and it's the final straw that makes her completely crack.

"Please! Please just touch me." Y/n cries making him smirk in victory, two fingers slip into her with ease feeling her tighten around him as if her body is begging for the physical attention. "Fuck."

"Oh baby, you want it badly." Lewis chuckles while she lets her head drop back, mainly because she can't bear the sight.

Her whimpers grow louder and louder before her back arches at just one tap at her clit. As Lewis predicted he did make her soak the she's squirting onto his hand.

Y/n pants, hardly recovered before he's pushed his dick into her.

"Please please please." Y/n whispers then crying out. Overstimulated from him and the fact she's waited so long to get this again.

"Just let it me have it all, y/n." Lewis commands making her try to pull at her hands desperate to touch him. But he's limited her ability to touch him on purpose, it's all part of his plan.

She has to not just want him but need him and he's got to push her to that.

Another orgasm triggers his own. Maybe he didn't enjoy it being such a long time either.

"No, please." Y/n whimpers when he pulls out.

"Aftercare, baby."

"I don't care." Y/n mutters but she still won't look at him.

"I do." Lewis states making her swallow thickly.

Lewis does clean her up before untying her picking her up and moving her onto the top of the drawers, noticing her grimace. Presumably a little sore since he was kind of rough.

"Don't move."

Admittedly Lewis doesn't usually change his own sheets, he has a housekeeper. But with him intending to keep y/n's captivity secret, he ends up changing sheets before moving her back onto the bed.

"I'm going to be gone for the race. But I've got to set up so you don't starve...can I trust you not to do something that means you're going to die in here while I'm gone?" Lewis asks since he knows there's a risk to giving her a fridge or airfryer is a risk.

Y/n's levels a glare shifting her jaw.

"Yes."

"Good girl."

-

Y/n really didn't think things could get worse.

Well worse to an extent. Lewis was kind enough to not leave her completely bored. Instead he's given her books to read to pass the time. Admittedly it's better than nothing.

But y/n is a social butterfly, she's an extrovert, she gets energy from being surrounded by people. She loves socialising.

Her mind can't help but wonder where she would be if she hadn't got herself into this situation.

The worst part is she really doesn't know when she might leave this room, when Lewis will trust her. She also doesn't know how he's made her feel so pathetic that she's desperate for his company and his touch when he's the whole reason behind this.

She doesn't even know what time of day it is. She has no idea how many days have past. She doesn't even know if a day has past or not.

-

Lewis got back home and sighs trying to decide if he wants to go straight to y/n or leave her for longer. He's been checking in on her and noticed that she's showered 3 times a day for over half an hour each time then used the hair dryer to dry herself off when the towels got too wet for her to keep using. She'd easily eaten 90% of the food out of boredom and it looks like she read half the books. Then she slept a significant amount.

He does decide to see her before anything else.

Walking in he finds she's actually asleep and he smiles deciding to just join her and see what happens. He pulls off most of his clothes and climbs onto the bed with her.

Instantly she jumps awake, clearly startled by the presence of another body but when she suddenly wraps her arms around him and nuzzles her face into his chest.

Her body begins to shake as she cries against him.

"I missed you." Y/n hiccups actually hyperventilating latched onto him. "Please don't leave me. Please. I don't want to be left."

"I'm here now." Lewis soothes kissing the top of her head.

He's got no intentions of any freedom in the foreseeable future. Y/n is where he wants her and on hand. The only time he intends to move her is when he's figured out a way to make a room in his apartment in Monaco have equal security. Then he'll move her there. But until then, she's going to be in this room.

Maybe at some point he'll let her back out into the rest of the house.

But this is her life now, and she will get used to it. And he'll enjoy these moments of her relying on him as her means of maintaining some form of sanity.

Lewis really loves being wanted and needed like this.

Dark fic Taglist: @hiireadstuff @ellienorriss @decafmickey @daemyratwst @flowersonstreets @bethanymccauley @randomnessis-mine-me @sunf1ower16 @rylie-lothbrok @cixrosie @8justme @jehun @scopeiguess @bborra @poppyflower-22 @noneofyourfbusinessworld @igotnorrrizz @unknownmystery22 @nirrahbrii @sbella13 @d3kstar @neilakk @kawaiisadoglu @a-moment-captured @aeri101

#f1 #fanfic #formula 1 #lewis hamilton one shot #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton fic #lewis hamilton #sir lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x you #lewis hamilton smut #lewis hamilton x y/n #dark!f1 #dark!fic #dark!lewis hamilton #lh44 x you #lh44 imagine #lh44 x reader #lh44 #lh44 x y/n #lh44 smut #lh44 one shot #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 2024 #formula one #mercedes amg petronas

[p1utofairy]

PAC: “i just wanna be your favorite…” ⭐️🎀💍

• which fictional characters is your person most like?

disclaimer ✩: 18+ mature themes. take what resonates, leave what doesn't. i also just wanna say thank y'all from the bottom of my heart for the support <3 it means so much to me. enjoy!

pile 1 💸 —

"i can't wait 'til i get you on the floor, good-looking. hey, going hot, so hot, just like an oven. and ow! burned myself, i just had to touch it. but it's so fire, and it's all mine."

hiii pile 1! let me start off by saying your person is one fineeee m'fer! they look straight out of an old hollywood movie. suit & tie by justin timberlake ft. jay z won't stop playing in my head lol, their vibe is literally that song. they're gonna love taking you out to fun events and showing you off to people hehe i heard "trophy wife." this isn't in a superficial way by any means, they just really love how you look and how bright your personality shines. you have a mesmerizing appearance and an extraordinary personality to match. i feel like your eyes or their eyes is another main focus that will garner lots of compliments. ok, wow. back to the topic at hand! the characters i channeled were jay gatsby from ‘the great gatsby’, lon hammond from ‘the notebook’, and napoleon solo from ‘the man from U.N.C.L.E.’ now of course your person may not exactly look like these characters but the ✨vibes✨ are very much there. you're gonna have the time of your life with this person lol they are so damn fun and charismatic. i can hear them teasing you and and saying "don't be a brat, baby." with a sly smirk on their face LOL they're gonna make you feel so tingly and giddy inside ahhh. i feel like it was hard for them to settle down before you came into their life pile 1. they wanted to have their cake and eat it too. i mean this person could honestly have whatever they want, but you actually make them work for this relationship and they're not used to that. people (romantically and platonically) just fall for them at the drop of a dime because they are just so damn sexy, and it doesn't help that they're good with their words and actions. i just heard smooth operator by sade and ego by beyoncé at the same time lol this person is seriously a charmer! they can't help it though, they just love to socialize and have a good time. on the flip side, this sometimes weighs them down. the constant attention and socializing can make them feel overwhelmed at times. i'm thinking of ‘the great gatsby’ when jay kept throwing elaborate parties and inviting thousands of people to attend them, so that he could eventually catch daisy's attention. i'm hearing "when you're happy, they're happy!" random thought, but for some of you…your person could be from the UK/have a thick british accent. i also feel like your person is funny af, they've got jokes for dayssssss. they honestly take nothing serious…like if either of you had a bad day at work or just in general, TRUST that they will find a way to turn it around. like it'll actually amaze you how they just go through life vibing and you'll just be like how??? and i can hear them saying "i don't know, babe. i just got it like that." lol they're so cocky (but in an annoyingly hot way) you will never be able to stay mad at them. like if you were being petty and giving them the silent treatment for whatever reason…i can see you getting ready and they'd come up all close behind you, arms around your waist, kissing your neck and they'd be like "you still mad at me, baby?" and your brain would literally malfunction like €|>~€\€,\!|!]€]€YESNOYESNO.!:!,&:’ i'm crying this is hilarious. never a dull moment with them, pile 1. i'm telling ya!

other channeled messages:

theme from new york, new york by frank sinatra, gene kelly, tuxedo, her way by partynextdoor, sophisticated, expensive cologne, j'adore dior, pearly white teeth, cartier watch, swarovski crystals, meet me on the dance floor, babydoll by mariah carey, british, sprinter by dave & central cee, love island, damson idris, i'll make it happen, ballin’ by partynextdoor, diamonds are a girl's best friend

pile 2 💣 —

“who wants that perfect love story anyway, anyway. cliché, cliché, cliché, cliché. who wants that hero love that saves the day, anyway cliché, cliché, cliché, cliché.”

okayyyy pile 2, i see y'all with the bonnie and clyde vibes! let's buckle down and get serious though. i already feel like your person is very misunderstood. they might've had a rough childhood growing up or possibly struggled with connecting to their family. they feel like they fuck things up? they kinda think to themselves "why should i even try to be in a relationship, i'm a mess. i mess things up." it's actually sad because i feel like they're a great person (very soft and gentle) and when things go left/don't work out they immediately blame themselves because the blame was always put on them as a child. i'm hearing it's a "trauma response" :( aw pile 2 i feel like crying…your person really takes it on the chin and keeps it pushing. i can see them sitting on porch steps, gazing at the skyline and kinda just shrugging saying "that's just life i guess." they tend to self-sabotage before things even go into motion but before you two meet, they'll be pushed to confront their problems/fears. they have this cool, in-control, idgaf type of vibe on the outside but internally it's the opposite. i'm hearing pretty little fears by 6lack ft. j cole wow pile 2 they'll really have a soft spot for you. the characters i channeled were damon salvatore from ‘the vampire diaries’, luke glanton from ‘the place beyond the pines’ and tyler durden from ‘fight club’ which are some pretty complex personalities whew. your person is a loner by default, they feel like they really can't depend on many people. they've been left out in the cold so many times it's like they had no other choice but to become independent fast. when they meet you, pile 2…you're going to awaken them. i'm hearing j cole's verse in pretty little fears, “i'm loving your light, vulnerable. letting your guard down is honorable. 'specially when the past ain't been that friendly to you, but…there's magic in that.” it's gonna be insane to them how someone like you could display so much love, care and devotion towards them. i can see them keeping a really cute picture of you (or you two together) in their wallet/bag and just staring at it with a small smile on their face. you give them so much hope pile 2. they never knew they were capable of such strong emotions; love, happiness, joy. i can see you two laughing about something…you have this big grin on your face and when you turn your head to look at them, you just see them with a dopey smile on their face and a glint in their eyes just staring at you in awe. and you're just like "what?" but you don't even know how much you really mean to them in that moment. I'M ABOUT TO BURST INTO TEARS PLS I CAN'T. they're not used to anything stable, but you give them hope and anticipation for their future…with you. y'all are going to have to have so many enlightening, deep and forward-thinking conversations. i see them holding your hand and kissing your knuckles, taking random drives at night together while blasting music and going to the movies and talking/debating afterwards about what you hated and what you loved. k i'm crying, bye!

other channeled messages:

west coast by lana del rey, west side, successful relationship, turning tables by adele, cigarettes out the window by tv girl, well my boyfriend's in a band, ultraviolence album, someone like u (interlude) by ariana grande, toxic upbringing, scorpio moon, aries, smoking weed, american psycho, it's a forever thing

pile 3 🐚 —

“every little thing you do got me feeling some type of way. when you gimme that thunder you make my summer rain.”

welcome to your reading pile 3! idk why i wanted to say pile 333 hehe let's take that as a sign that you're about to meet your person soon. your person is so easy-going…like their energy feels so carefree and warm; like a nice summer breeze (i feel like some of you that chose this pile watch/really love the summer i turned pretty) i can see your person adjusting their sunglasses and saying "i'm just happy to be here." they're such a vibe lol. ok and why did i just randomly hear "no you're cute jeans." their sense of humor is so sjhfjdjcjdsn y'all are gonna have a lot of inside jokes together; internet memes especially. that "i'm sorry, i'm just in a silly goofy mood" shemar moore video just popped up in my head LMFAOOOO your person is hilarious pile 3. i channeled johnny storm from ‘fantastic four’, chad meeks-martin from ‘scream vi’, stefan salvatore from ‘the vampire diaries’ and conrad fisher from ‘the summer i turned pretty’ which are all pretty different but i see the vision pile 3…i see the vision. i feel like your person has just gotten back to themselves, because for awhile they weren't this upbeat and silly. i feel like this has to do with a past hurt/betrayal from either a friend or an ex-lover…that person took them for granted and made them feel small. i just randomly heard "katherine pierce" so maybe that person was very sneaky and never had good intentions in the first place. when they're with you though, they feel like a moth drawn to a flame. best friend by 50 cent just came to mind, "if i was your best friend, i want you 'round all the time. (i want you 'round me all the time) girl, i'll be your best friend if you promise you'll be mine (girl, promise you'll be mine)." i see you both posting funny photo dumps of you two together on instagram/instagram stories. i feel like y'all will be a PDA couple, and even if you aren't one of those type of people that likes all that…they're definitely gonna make you so happy that people visibly see the love between the two of you. i can see them kissing the side of your head, you slightly leaning into them…them giving you their hoodie/jacket to wear when you're cold. it's subtle things like that 🥹 so so so cute. you two have a very sacred, beautiful and divinely protected relationship. your person will be very generous with their time, money and love when it comes to you pile 3.

other channeled messages:

there goes my baby by usher, one in a million by ne-yo, connie baby, it's your world i'm just living in it, positions by ariana grande, unlock it by charlie xcx ft. kim petras & jay park, right my side by nicki minaj ft. chris brown, long walks on the beach, forever boy, vintage camera/digital camera, breakin’ my heart (pretty brown eyes) by mint condition, taylor swift, peter parker

pile 4 🌹—

“moment of honesty. someone's gotta take the lead tonight, who's it gonna be? i'm gonna sit right here and tell you all that comes to me. if you have something to say, you should say it right now.”

heyyy pile 4. i'm kinda stunned rn cause your person is sooooooooo captivated by you. like they wanted to skip all the bullshit and get right into it, and honestly…i #respect it. they think you're an absolute badass, you handle tough situations with so much grace. i'm hearing "you're better than me." lol they play no games pile 4, especially when it comes to you! i'm hearing that you've been through a lot, and it hasn't been easy for you to get to the point in your life that you're at now. they just wanna kiss you and make everything better. kiss it better by rihanna just started playing, "kiss it, kiss it, better baby." yeah your person is sensual af pile 4, it's givingggg taurus vibes. this is random af but i feel like they really love your back? if you wear a backless top or a backless dress, they will go absolutely FERAL. like fingers ghosting down your spine, their lips kissing down your neck…and don't get me started on the eye contact. their gaze is INTENSE. i’m hearing lyrics from nobody by selena gomez, "no kiss, no lips, no feel, no rush can keep me high, i swear no one…can love me like you do. can love me like you do, no." the characters i channeled were tobias eaton from ‘divergent’ and anakin skywalker from ‘star wars prequel trilogy’ which is so on brand. those 2 did not play about tris and padmé, ok?! you are their whole world pile 4. if it's not you, they don't want it. they feel so relaxed around you…like they can finally breathe. i can see them standing in a serious stance (obviously tense af) pondering about something and you just come behind them and wrap them in a big bear hug and they just…melt. they finally take that deep breath that they didn't even realize they were holding in for so long. they usually keep their feelings to themselves, but you create such a great safe space for them to be so open, honest and vulnerable; and vice versa. i'm also hearing that they are a very hands-on type of person, so whatever you need done/fixed, they sure as hell will find a way to do it for you. i can also see you two chilling/relaxing together a lot. don't get me wrong this person will always find something for you two to do, but there's something about that downtime (watching a movie while cuddled up with you on the couch, spending time with you and your loved ones/friends or taking a late night drive with you) that makes them think to themselves, "damn i really love life." 😮‍💨 you've got them locked in pile 4. it's so sweet & amazing.

other channeled messages:

1 of 1, peppers by lana del rey ft. tommy genesis, skywalker by miguel ft. travis scott, adore by cashmere cat ft. ariana grande, it's us against the world baby, 90210, pisces, dream guy, sauvage cologne, miss dior, sagittarius rising, virgo's groove by beyoncé, 1:11, best i ever had (remix) by drake & nicki minaj, all i want is you by miguel ft. j cole, bouquet of flowers, tennis bracelet, wild thoughts by dj khaled ft. rihanna & bryson tiller, cpr by summer walker

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