#i'm not even fucking joking

[deadringers2023]

i'm not even gonna lie.... some of y'all on this site have gotten real comfortable being disrespectful on gifsets. like it takes NOTHING to scroll past media you don't like or don't understand. did your parents NOT teach any of you manners??? did they not teach you that 'if you have nothing nice to say, DON'T say anything at all?' because it's truly that simple. i don't think any of you will be satisfied until one of us snaps on y'all and when that happens?? some of you will very much deserve every bit of nastiness you get. we do this FOR FUN, not because we HAVE to. and if y'all CONTINUE to be nasty on gifsets, we will stop. so think twice before you hop in the tags of a set you DIDN'T have to reblog only to say something stupid like 'this movie/show/anime sucked lol' k? thanks.

#like i'm using the block button SO religiously for some of y'all #because you lot are getting NASTIER and NASTIER #i'm not even fucking joking #and if someone snaps on you #you will deserve EVERY bit of it!!!!! #ok to rb #malina.txt

[saintalec]

sexting and I accidentally write tucker instead of fucked like

#help #ttoi #I'm not even fucking joking

[marypsue]

Keep seeing that post where OP starts like 'Thinking about...grieving the undead' and then adds on about like. Real life situations where people have not died but have left your life and you would have reason to grieve them.

All respect, that's an important concept, but that is not what I am thinking about when I read 'grieving the undead'.

#your brother is a vampire. he's sitting across the table from you chatting with your mother about her day #and he's dead and he's gone and he's never coming back. #he laughs the same and he talks the same but his arm is cold when he grabs you in a headlock and your dog won't be in the same room with hi #he'll still hang around watching TV with you and give you wedgies and make stupid jokes #but you can't tell him about the bullies at school anymore because this thing with your brother's face will just find them and kill them. #and not even stupid fucking Jason deserves what the monster in your dead brother's skin would do to him. #your brother is dead and lost and right there in arm's reach and gone forever with no hope of ever getting him back. #i'm sure there are corollaries to be written about like ghosts and zombies but this is the one i'm personally hung up on recently

[obscureenthusiast]

-Brutus and as many as 60 co-conspirators, circa March 14th, 44 BC

#ides of march #would you believe that I created this image all the way back in january STRICTLY BECAUSE I HAVE THAT MUCH BEEF WITH CAESAR? #this was created because he insisted that the Rhine was the border between Gaul and Germany #just so he could declare that he'd 'conquered' Gaul #but there's very little evidence that the peoples living in those places even viewed the Rhine as a barrier between lands #and their continued fighting against rome along that border line could indicate that they were in fact #attempting to reunite lands occupied by foreign invaders #anyway fuck you caesar i hope your triumph sucked ass #and that everyone who ever made bald jokes about you found idk a denarius in their pocket unexpectedly #yes i'm retroactively wishing dead people good and ill i'm complicated like that

[coldbycrossfade]

MAN THAT REALLY COLORS THIS RESPONSE IN THIS CONVERSATION SO DIFFERENTLY FOR ME

#bg3 #like here my silly ass that doesn't know shit was thinking 'wow i'm actually surprised he's pretty chill with this' #JOKES ON ME I'M BOOBOO THE FOOL #IT'S P R O B A B L Y MORE LIKELY THAT HE JUST ASSUMES IT WON'T LAST AND HE HAS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT #WOW............DAMN............GOT ME #CAUGHT ME SLIPPIN CAUSE I AM A LORE NOVICE HERE.................................... #like SURE you could ASSUME that astarion would be flippant about having multiple partners like why wouldn't the flirty one be that way righ #but no no no there's much to think about here i'm unpacking the fucking layers i can feel my mind peeling like an onion #woag mama #i'm not articulate today b/c brain fog but i hope that made any sense #and hey maybe I'M even making assumptions but calling it a 'harmless affair' just.....that hits different #astarion

[starrystevie]

it was all supposed to be a joke. they were supposed to be in steve’s backyard with all their friends and family in shitty lawn chairs, holding cans of budweiser and jamming to whatever song eddie was in the mood for that day blasting through the speakers. steve was supposed to be in front of them all in a tuxedo t-shirt and powder blue dress pants, flowers in his hair that had been teased to high heaven and dark black sunglasses to keep out the bright sun. that’s how they had planned it all those years ago when they’d been high and drunk and young and in love.

but somehow instead, the yard is full of flowers and benches that hopper and wayne put together with spare wood for everyone to sit on and there’s an archway at the end of the aisle and soft acoustic songs spilling gently out of the speakers. steve’s still at the front, that was always supposed to happen, but this time he’s wearing an actual tux, light cream with a boutonnière and everything, and his hair is pushed back just so. there’s no flowers in his hair and no sunglasses but it’s cloudy enough of a day where he doesn’t really need them anyway.

they weren't even supposed to do this. there wasn't supposed to be a grand entrance and a walk down the aisle, no flower girls or ring bearers or anything remotely traditional. but what started off as, "well, i wouldn't mind walking down the aisle," and "i think exchanging rings would be cool," and "who cares if it isn't legal, i'm going to marry you anyway damnit," turned into this beautiful day of friends and family and love.

robin’s standing beside him in a tux of her own, pinstripe grey donning a pocket boutonnière that matches nancy’s bouquet, with a few notecards in her hands. and speaking of nancy, she’s heading down the aisle in a flowing dress, and when her eyes catch robin’s, she crinkles her nose before blowing her a kiss. she stands opposite of steve as eddie's not-quite-bridesmaid and grips her bouquet tightly, her eyes never leaving robin's.

and then there's dustin. he's in a tux that matches steve's and he has his curls pushed back with probably too much gel and a tie that suzie got him for their 3rd anniversary. the best thing he's sporting, though, is the smile on his face and the ring box in his hand and the joy in his eyes as he looks out at the crowd. having him there as best man and smelling the cheap cologne he wears so he seems more grown up calms steve's ever beating heart enough to where he doesn't think he'll throw up from nerves anymore.

all of their loved ones are surrounding them in clothes steve’s never seen before but he couldn’t care at all what they’re wearing because they’re all smiling wide and bright at him. he catches himself rocking back and forth on his feet so he shakes out his hands and holds them behind his back to distract himself. his stomach is rolling with waves or butterflies and when he catches joyce's eye in the front row, she mimes taking in a deep breath which he instantly copies. the soft grin she sends in return tells him that he thinks it could actually work to settle him. mothers have that healing way about them.

he’s never been good with weddings, always fidgeting in a too tight suit his mom picked out, but he never thought he’d be this antsy at his own.

steve's just about to give up and sprint down the aisle to get eddie so they can run away together and leave nerves and or butterflies behind him, but then the music stops. he sees lucas changing out the tapes quickly, giving a thumbs up to mike who throws one to will who runs back behind the shed to where he knows eddie is waiting and when will pops his head back out to run back to his seat, it hits him.

he's getting married.

steve doesn't have time to think about it anymore than he already has been for the last 8 years because eddie's coming around the corner of the shed.

'here comes the sun' is playing out over the speakers, soft and perfect, and eddie's smiling, wide and beautiful, and steve can't help but mirror it back to him. the clouds overhead seem to hear them, hear the song and hear their hearts beating in time with each other, because as soon as eddie gets to the aisle, bright warm rays of sunlight peak out and make the rhinestones he demanded line the lapels of his own black tux shine like real diamonds.

steve stops breathing. he swears he does, and he knows his family are all feeling the same way. he can hear a few gasps, hears joyce muttering what she thinks is a silent, "oh my god," in hop's ear, and watches how wayne stands up just a bit straighter from his front row seat.

eddie glides down the aisle like the drama king he is, soaking in the looks from everyone they care about and soaking in the sun that seems to come out only for him. it's like the sun knows he's a star, too, and wants to come out to be with one of it's own. eddie's always been sunshine and starlight and a blinding thing to look at and take in. he's the light, steve's the moth, and a few clouds on their wedding day could never change it.

"well, that was insanely good timing," eddie whispers to steve once he reaches him. his grin softens and he brings up a hand to wipe gently at the tear tracks on steve's cheeks. "hi, baby."

and steve can do nothing but choke out a laugh, catching eddie's hand in his own so he press a kiss to his palm. he thinks he can feel eddie's heartbeat against his lips and, even if it's his brain playing tricks on him, he likes the sentiment that it brings. "i love you so fucking much."

it's eddie's turn to get teary-eyed and the sun glints off the tears that fall down his cheek before heading back behind the clouds, dotting quick-to-fade sparkles on his face like a wedding present.

steve kisses him. he can't help it. it's nothing but a fast press of lips, watery smile to watery smile, and everyone is cheering except for robin.

"hey! it's not time for that yet," she says with a pretend scowl, arms pressing to each of their chests to keep them apart. it's enough to leave nancy giggling where she stands behind eddie, her laugh like bells bouncing off of the trees surrounding them. "just give me like ten minutes and we'll have you married and you can kiss all you want then."

steve swears he can hear mike groan at that which cause him to grin which cause eddie to grin back and then they're holding hands like it's the only way to get through the next ten minutes. and it might just be the only way to get through it. knowing them, if they didn't hold on tight, one of them would make a move first and there'd be hands around waists and fingers tangled in hair and robin would hate them forever because she wouldn't get to do her speech.

it's after vows are shared, after rings are on fingers, after kisses are pressed to lips and cheeks and temples and hands and everything else they can quickly reach, that the two of them get some peace. everyone is inside eating snacks and drinking cheap champagne, and it goes unspoken that they're going to take some time for themselves. take some time to bask in their new maybe not-so-legally real but as real as could ever be in their hearts marriage.

they make their way, hand in hand like they've always been meant to do, to a table set up for them. eddie pops a bottle of champagne that they pass back and forth between themselves as they share cheesy smiles and champagne-laced kisses. and it's as they look into each other's eyes, fingers lacing so their rings clink softly against each other, that the sun peaks out to say hello once more.

#hi so this is the post from that poll i had going around for a bit #my friend got married last wekend and it was super cloudy but as soon she she came out to walk do the aisle to hear comes the sun #the sun came out and shone only on her i'm not even fucking joking #literally not a dry eye in the house when it happened #her now husband was like bent over crying it was so sweet #steddie #steddie headcanon #my writing #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie drabble #steddie ficlet #steddie fluff #oh ps happy pride month to steddie

[fictionallyinparadise]

"I'm so normal about him" I say about the fictional man that makes me kick my feet and giggle and blush and feel butterflies

#general gush post #🌼; his lawman #<- i made this with him in mind 😭👍 #but anyone can reblog as always #ajdkoakfjakfo #i'm just a little silly a little goofy a little fuCKING INSANE EVEN #my friends make jokes about getting me a body pillow with him but girl thay would fix me

[berrymeter]

if i see you fuckers try to give jkr’s new book the “morbius treatment” i’m going to end you. morbius was a mediocre film no one cared about & it did have jared leto which made it suck more but the film itself wasn’t anything noteworthy afaik, however this book is filled to the brim with bigotry & i would fucking hate to see it get more attention because you morons tried to be funny about a transmisogynist who is actively contributing to worsening the lives of trans women everywhere & especially the UK. think for a fucking second

editing this because some of you are insufferable. i am jewish, disabled, autistic & plural. i know she is all flavours of fascist. this post is specifically bringing up the biggest reason why giving her a platform is bad: the legislations that use her writing as a way to push their claims are specifically anti-trans. i am begging you all to honest to god shut the fuck up & stop expecting this post to be informational on what she's done wrong because that is NOT the purpose. if you want a post citing every wrong deed she's committed, go reblog one. this isn't it. if you dislike my wording so much, steal my post & edit it for yourself.

#perth.txt #also i'm not transfem but as a trans person nonetheless why the fuck would i wanna hear about this book?? #joke or not i DONT want to hear about it. i wanna hear about it tank & thats the end of it. #now the amount of ppl who didnt & still dont know leto is a cult leader is concerning still #but i dont think he made money off the sales? unsure how actors' contracts work #now worth mentioning it still did give him some more visibility but again not enough that ppl even know what he does

[sergle]

I'm thinking abt that pretty fall leaves embroidery pattern post and about how like... it is categorically a repost, it's a reupload. right? a thing that is generally disliked. but because it's credited, it's genuinely boosting the artist in question. and it could ALWAYS be like this. reposting content could ALWAYS be a symbiotic relationship, but because sourcing back to the original creator of something is so uncommon, it's just easier to ask people not to repost it at all. and people still don't understand the difference. or they'll go to the effort of cropping out usernames/signatures to repost something, which is More Effort than literally crediting the creator of something you liked enough to want to repost. Like. I literally don't actually care if my own shit gets reposted, you have to understand. I just don't want it STOLEN. But "do not repost" is easier to write on my art than "you can repost this, but don't alter the image/remove my signature, don't you dare write 'credit goes to the artist' because that is not credit, please link back to my original post or someplace that you can actually find me. please use an actual link/url instead of writing a non-clickable link of my username, because making it text instead of a clickable link cuts the number of people who will go to the effort of visiting my own page in Half." All those aggregate themed accounts, those fuckin annoying as hell instagrams and facebook groups that are like "body positive art we love wamen 💕 hashtag feminism" and then MASS-STEAL plus sized art created by women, if pages like these that always go and steal my older self-portraits and other works... If they just put a link to my prints of those pieces in the text of those posts, or, fuck, my commission info page? I would literally be living on the moon right now. I would have a house on the moon

#there is actually nothing morally wrong with running an account that just reuploads ppl's artwork or their jokes or their cosplays #if you just put a VISIBLE LINK in the description of your post with proper credit then it would be beneficial for everyone #because you can get your little clout or whatever it is you want by putting a bunch of same-category content on a page #but nobody's getting fucked over because if your post blows up then people just get FUNNELED to the source #because it's placed so plainly where everyone can see it #and yeah it's better to retweet or reblog but #on the rare occasion that I see my shit reuploaded on tumblr WHICH IS WEIRD BC I MAKE MY OWN POSTS HERE but anyway #someone making their own post where they upload my stuff. and it's always the floral self portraits so let's say it's a post with all those #if I scroll to the bottom and it says like. Artwork by Serglesinner on Twitter <-- clickable link [Sergle's Prints] <-- clickable link #to my etsy #I'm like oh okay and all the anger leaves my body and I'm like ah I see. and I toss the rock aside #like oh okay so you actually care that a person made these pieces. Instead of posting the caption ''women <3'' or smth #like you've GOTTA die if you do that. but if you just link back #or if you go to the effort of writing like a description with a BLURB? like it's a damn museum. like a light paragraph of info #about what the art is and who made it and their links #I am literally sucking you in a strange and peculiar manner. that is extremely helpful #and maybe other artists don't want this AT ALL and they'd rather people not reupload even if it is credited #but I feeeeeeeeel. like 99% of the time this would solve the issue #reposters could genuinely be helping ppl. sometimes the repost gets more traction than the real thing #as long as it credits the creator then that's an okay thing to happen! #that can land somebody a sale! a commission order! a new fan! A JOB #A JOB!!!!!!!!!! #sergle.txt #I didn't write this eloquently AT ALL what the fuck ever barkbarkbarkbark

[aromantic-diaries]

My favorite argument against literally anything like "it's not natural" or something along those lines is simply I Don't Care

#aro #aromantic #arospec #ace #asexual #acespec #lgbtq+ #lgbtq #queer #< additional tags bc while i'm talking about being aro and ace this pretty much goes for literally every queer identity under the sun #not even joking. let's say hypothetically being trans is unnatural and wrong. i actually don't care i think it's awesome #i don't consider myself the rebellious type but i also go against several societal norms just by existing so fuck it. anarchy it is then #i cannot stress this enough. i don't care if it's wRoNg. i can live with that. you can't even imagine how willing i am to live with that

[punkeropercyjackson]

"This is the gender fuckery and cis+ website"You guys can't even handle trans people who don't want to physically transition

#no because this literally ruined my first best friendship after i grew up friendless my whole life💀she sxually harrased me with bodyshaming #and the worst part is that it wasn't even her saying i'll never be a man i'm bigender and super femme and THAT'S why i want to stay afab #but she refused to understand me!!!she expected my femininity to be the same as a cisgirls and my manhood the same as binary trans dudes' #i explained my gender SO MANY TIMES and she used 'she' 'accidentally' even though her fuckass also called me 'a girl in a he/him kinda way' #she saw my bigenderness and genderfluidity as a fucking joke instead of who i actually am just because i don't want t or surgeries bc gnc #and i told her both those things too but here we are!!BE NORMAL ABOUT TRANS PEOPLES BODIES AND STOP BEING A DICK EVEN IF YOU'RE ALSO TRANS #trans #transgender #transmasc #transmasculine #bigender #genderfluid #trans men #demigirl #ftm #transfem #trans women #nonbinary #agender #demiboy #transneutral #transmascfem #black femme #genderqueer #xenogender #catgender #dragongender #ghostgender #💌 #summerposting

[bibibuck]

los angeles wasn't built in a day

buck/eddie | rated m | chapter 1/5 | 10k (this chapter) | getting together, fake dating (in a sense)

“We’re not going to pretend to be divorced just so Chris can get into a summer camp, Buck,” Eddie says, trying to sound convincing even as he starts to feel his resolution crumbling inside of him. “Why not?” Buck asks, sounding genuinely baffled, like he can’t understand Eddie’s refusal at all. And how does Eddie begin to explain the irrationality of his rational denial? He can’t tell Buck the real reason he can’t go through with it. He can’t tell him without having to reach into his chest, clawing out his heart, setting it down at Buck’s feet still beating, and saying, “Because the only thing worse than loving you knowing I can’t have you would be having to pretend like I didn’t love you enough to keep you with me forever.” (or the fake ex husbands to fake husbands to husbands fic.)

(read on ao3)

#buddie #buddie fic #911fic #911 fic #911 #911 on abc #fics i write #well well well you thought you'd seen the last of me huh?!? #jokes on you cause i am back and worse than ever!!! #this fic has been in the works for almost 2 years now and it's not even finished but i need to push myself to just fucking finish it #so i'm hoping that by posting is as a multi-chaptered story i will both get the inspiration and the motivation to write and post as i go #hope y'all enjoy it babes <3333 #fake ex husbands fic

[qroier]

miss them every day. happy anniversary spiderbit

#i'm too bummed to even make this into some sort ratatoier joke i'll do that later if i remember #2 months without them...... might end up being over 3 by the time this is all over. fuck my stupid baka life #qsmp #spiderbit #roier #cellbit #cubitos #speaking #spiderbit anniversary

[fleshadept]

the love story being so central to our flag means death really is mindblowing. i haven’t stopped thinking about it for months. it is, to its core, a romance. that was the point. the queer romance wasn’t written in in the second or third season because the fandom picked up on the homoeroticism and made a ship popular. it wasn’t added in because the fans demanded it or because the actors pushed for it later on it wasn’t forced into slowburn by a network it was there the whole time.

when stede showed ed his secret closet that was on purpose an allegory, when they shared the marmalade bread that was romantic intentionally, when they rowed away from the burning party boat and ed was looking at stede that was him FALLING IN LOVE . that's how it was WRITTEN. ed really actually leaned in and almost kissed stede in the moonlight scene. and then. they actually kissed! like i know this is months old news now but i can’t get over how fucking different this feels to other queer romances i’ve seen. it is the core and central plot of the show and it’s beautiful. it’s funny it’s cute it’s heartwarming it’s GOOD. they did it.

#i cannot emphasize how good it feels to have a queer story #at all first of all #but also a queer romance that didn't require the writers/network to be held at gunpoint for several seasons before allowing it to happen #comparing it to hannibal is interesting because hannibal was very much trying to be an openly queer story it was just airing on NBC #from 2013-2015 #so they couldn't #but even that wasn't planned until later on like it wasn't MEANT to be queer from the beginning #i have said before this show healed a part of my soul #sorry guys i'm emo today! #cricket chirps #just like. i knew they kissed when i STARTED the show and even then i refused to look at the obviously romantic scenes as romantic!!! #because so many fucking shows play it off as a joke or use it as queerbait or WHATEVER #ofmd #our flag means death #5k

[erinsintra]

friendly reminder that in the percy jackson world, it's canon that amazon is run by buff dominant women who treat bezos as their little boislave

#i'm not even joking tbh #read the series it's fucking awesome #fyp #fypツ #memes #tumblr fyp #explorepage #explore #funny #hilarious #foryou #fypage #more fyp to spite anon #meme #dumb shit #shitpost #shitposting #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #percy pjo #heroes of olympus

[lacefuneral]

stede pink suit tribute

#ofmd #yes even my joke fancams loop. #fun fact: this video is longer than the time this suit actually appears on screen for #i think the funniest bit of this is how fucking high res the shots of his face are compared to the actual shots of the suit bc of how much #i had to zoom in on the footage #i'm learning new sharpening methods in AE #ilu double cineon converter double unsharp mask sandwich <3 #thats why stede's face looks so good #the suit not so much sggdshhgdsh #got the tumblr aspect ratio wrong as well. this is why i usually stick to the native resolution of the show #don't ask me why i tried to manually stabilize the footage instead of warp stabilizing. i'm not a pirate i'm an idiot etc. #song is ''ain't no thing'' by oliver nelson and kaleem taylor #jay.mp4