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#i'm not really happy with the left one so just look at the right one thanks 💜
sxmmer-cherry · 3 days
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❝UH-OH, THERE'S A PROBLEM, BABY!❞
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♰ OVERTURE — irresponsibility is a vice. but isn't making mistakes a part of human nature? well, let's say something of the similar nature takes place when you're booking hotels for your vacation get-away; a minor mistake ends up in you booking a love-making hotel instead of a regular, kid-friendly one. how do they react?
♰ FEATURING — all sumeru men.
♰ NOTES — guys help i don't know how to write al haitham but i tried😭suggestive, flirty and spicy like i like it <3 ngl though this is just peak rizz all the way lmao🤭
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wanderer retains his analytical gaze from before, going through his mini bag with a slightly pissed off look on his features.
his indifference is so baffling that you're left with the tiniest suspicion that in his quest to find his phone's charger, he hasn't even listened to what you had to say at all. and with the lingering thought you poke the side of his arm, carefully examining his features to ensure you could shut up before the visage of anger overtook.
'did you listen, love?', you call out gently, in a soft voice, voice barely above a whisper and he breaks out of his reverie, looking up at you with a distracted gaze.
'oh, yeah, i did.' he goes back to his bag as he sorts the wires out and nods as he speaks with nonchalance, 'you accidentally booked the wrong hotel? and it's quite expensive so we must stay here for the vacations,'
you are quick to nod, 'yeah, that. i'm really sorry, i should have let you book the hotel and reservations. i really just wanted to help—'
he rolls his eyes with the most amount of nonchalance he had ever mustered before snatching the keys to the room from your hands and quickly opening the door.
he pulls the bags in, and allows you to rest on the bed (and ponder what he about to say next, or rather, what he didn't say at all).
but he is quick to kill your overthinking state, passing you a thoughtful look.
'i mean, we didn't come for a whole vacation for me to not have any fun at all. booking such a hotel...' he looks around with a smirk, before meeting your eyes again, 'is only going to make everything all the more easier, no?'
and in your flustered state, red with embarrassment and looking away with a shy expression, you do not expect it when he pins you to the bed with a sharp push.
'you would have had to keep your mouth shut, wouldn't you, dove? at least you can scream to your heart's content here.'
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cyno... has few words to speak. he looks up at you, familiar with the name of the love hotel. when your eyes meet, he almost laughs at the furious blush around your ears and then shakes his head with a sigh.
'a minor mistake, yet a common one indeed.'
'i'm sorry,' you say, voice barely audible against the loud of the hotel's entry.
no doubt—the hotel was more fancy than the imagination could entirely comprehend, and affordable too at that! nothing off the charts, and cyno trusted your sense of aesthetics too. with a swimming pool, luxurious king sized beds, an indoor club and even an indoor arcade of it's own, it was an obvious choice for you.
considering how excited you were back then, on second thought, maybe you shouldn't actually do things when you're too happy; you give yourself a mental note.
when cyno begins slinging the bag on his side and taking the trolley bag, you hold his hand in a hesitant motion; he turns to you with a confused gaze, brows lifted in an investigating gesture.
'let's go somewhere else, please.'
your words are something he has rehearsed in his head thrice, already. and he smiles when he realizes that he was right on point with his intuition. of course you would say that; you were a shy, reserved yet dignified person. you wouldn't have ever gone to a love hotel, even if you actually had that intent.
and when you didn't? god forbid, somebody tries to take you there.
but he sees the way you slightly hesitate, trying not to display your discomfort too much and plead to his softer side, trying to convince him somehow. he smiles at your considerate act before chuckling gently; gaze gentle in it's wake.
'we can go somewhere else if you want to, but wouldn't you say quite a lot of money will go to waste?'
you nodded slowly before sighing, shaking your head at your irresponsible behaviour. time to put on the big girl panties and take the blow of the situations that you put yourself in, you thought to yourself.
cyno, however, develops a more mischievous smile.
'what?' you end up asking him, genuinely confused before he whispers in your ear—
'don't be too sad, lovely. we may enter two, but who knows? perhaps we leave three?'
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kaveh coughs slightly, trying not to choke on the water that he is drinking when his gaze scans the insides of the hotel.
you shuffle your feet and idly fixate on the newspaper stand in the distance, pretending as though you did not know what was up.
'but you said you booked a slightly wrong hotel? this is slightly wrong?'
you cleared your throat before shrugging, trying to be nonchalant about it. 'i mean, remove the slightly, i guess then.'
'you guess?' kaveh asks with a baffled look on his features, disbelief washing over his features like a tide. he turns to walk towards the receptionist to take the keys with a roll of his eyes, 'god save mankind from whatever you consider as a huge mistake.'
you click your tongue before trotting behind him shyly, less confident now that you finally began looking around and spotted people who were way more comfortable in their skin than you would ever be.
your gaze scans the swimming pool outside, women and men enjoying the sunshine and the water and each others bodies with more enthusiasm than you could imagine.
it is only when a man winks at you with a suggestive smile on his features that you turn to kaveh abruptly, holding the edge of his shirt with a nervous disposition.
he pockets his keys before turning to you with a confused gaze, 'what is it?'
you gulp slightly, shaking your head. 'nothing, uh, a man was staring at me inappropriately.'
he looks at you up and down before letting his lips shape a lop-sided grin, 'want me to help with that problem?'
'how so?'
'people don't set their eyes on land which clearly says—'no trespassing', darling.'
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al haitham looks once at the room, thrice at you and then blinks.
'what's wrong?' he asks, as if he genuinely doesn't know what's wrong. you scoff.
'everything.'
he ends up rolling his eyes before pulling you inside the hotel room, softly clicking the door lock before he followed.
'start arranging the clothes; it's a month long vacation, you don't want to spend the entire time struggling to find that one designer—'
'al haitham, come on, stop pretending as though nothing's wrong. let's just go somewhere else!', you say, voice whiny and brows furrowed in an irritated manner. what do you even call this kind of behaviour? how ignorant could he be?
his hands immediately fold, and he almost reminds you of your mom when she is angry; though you maintain your serious look and stand up to him, nonetheless.
'and what's the problem, princess?'
'well!' you say, in an exaggerated motion, pointing to the entire room—
dim lights that were suggestive of only one thing as they sensually illuminated the silk sheets on the round, king sized bed. rose petals decorated the sheets and three drawers begged for your attention at the side of the bed; you didn't even have to go and open them to know what was in there.
'when my family asks me for photos, you expect me to show this to them?'
he shrugs, 'why would you share pictures of the hotel room, of all things?', then he squints, 'i think the problem lies elsewhere.'
you roll your eyes aggressively, although meaning no offense. 'yes, mr genius; this is a love-hotel, that's why i don't want to stay here.'
he clicks his tongue against the inside of his cheek before shaking his head with a sigh, 'well, what's done is done. not like we're not going to have any intimate moment throughout our trip. this makes it all the more easier for us to—'
al haitham doesn't have to think too hard about your response to his obvious flirtation when a pillow hits him square in the face; although he does end up laughing when he stands back up again to find you hiding in the sheets with the now messed up bed due to your recklessness.
'you're still acting like such a kid,' he speaks, teasing you to get a rise out of you before adding on—
'how are you going to take of our kids, at this rate?'
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tighnari maintains neutrality to an extent where you begin doubting if he finds this funny, stupid, anger-invoking or worse—all of that, in the same order.
if ambiguity was a maiden, she had draped her thin veil over his expression and aura, hiding his true feelings on the matter. though you do debate whether you're just overthinking, too. honestly, it's just a bit of a mistake, right? and the hotel's quite pretty too—there should be little problems, right?
wrong.
and a simple glance of the room is enough to enlighten you on the matter.
a massive chandelier hangs from the ceiling, and a mirror is attached to the ceiling wall, making everything visible; added for obvious reasons. next to the bedpost are aphrodisiacs and small, colourful packets about the nature of which you don't have to think much.
tighnari who was walking behind you, ends up peaking over from your shoulder and giving you a curious look.
'what is it? come on in,' and he steps inside, pulling the trolley bag with himself, before he turned back again to look at you when you don't budge from your spot.
he titles his head gently, ears moving with the motion, almost making you swoon. 'why aren't you coming in?' his voice comes to you and you sigh, softly ruffling your hair.
'you don't have to pretend, nari.' you say, gaze scanning his features to search for any change in his expression, only to fail when he showed nothing at all. what a master manipulator.
'pretend about what?'
'that you're okay with this.'
silence.
laughter blooms like a lotus opening under the sun, almost catching you off guard at the intensity and beauty of it. you end up blushing, thoroughly unsure of what he truly meant.
'come on idiot,' he calls to you, pulling you inside the room by your wrist, smile never leaving his features.
'you're confused because you can't understand what i really think?', he asks, gaze twinkling with mischeif.
you nod and his grin widens.
'well, darling dearest, i was just excited to try this out, but i couldn't have showed it, could i?', your blush intensifies at that, eyes widening in surprise before he continued.
'i mean, who knows? maybe we stumble across a secret chapter in our novel of love, no?'
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dixons-sunshine · 1 day
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hi I just wanted to start with I really love your writing its just so good. I do have a request and if your not interested its okay it is angst but with a possible happy ending.
so its a daryl x reader where before the apocalypse r and daryl were together and they ended things right before everything went to shit and then when the group gets to Alexandria r is there and she has kid/s (maybe twins?? boy and girl??) so turns out r found out she was pregnant right when everything started happening so daryl didn't know and idk he like puts two and two together yk? and if you're okay with it can she be hispanic/ latin (maybe that can be one of the reasons they broke up bc yk merl is an ass to POC)
anyways sorry if that was a lot or didn't make sense
anyways have a good day/night much love <3
Two Plus Two Makes Four | Daryl Dixon x Hispanic!Fem!Reader
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Summary: A week before the apocalypse, Daryl was forced to break up with you by Merle, leaving you heartbroken, but not alone—soon after he left, you found out you were pregnant. Now, two years later, you come face to face again with the man that broke your heart, and he finds out something shocking.
Genre: Angst, some fluff towards the end.
Era: Alexandria, pre Saviour arc.
Warnings: Swearing, mentions of pregnancy and childbirth.
Word count: 1.3k
A/n: Sorry this took so long to finish. I hope this is good enough to make up for the wait! Please note that I used Google translate for this, so the translations may be incorrect or awkward! Feel free to correct me if you spot any mistakes! (Translations will be at the bottom.)
“Kids?! Ya were pregnant and ya didn't fuckin' tell me?!” Daryl bellowed angrily, grabbing your arm to halt you from walking away from him.
You ripped your hand from his grip. “¡No me toques!” You spun around, furiously pointing a finger in your ex boyfriend's direction. “Don't you even dare put this on me, Dixon! You left. You walked out because you cared more about your brother's opinion than you did me! I'm sorry I wasn't gonna baby trap a man who didn't wanna be with me!”
“I deserved to know! I missed two years of their lives 'cause ya didn't tell me! I could of been there fer 'em, for ya, but ya chose to keep it from me!” Daryl exclaimed angrily, following you as you walked into your kitchen. “How could ya keep tha' from me?!”
“You chose to run to your brother the first chance you got! Four years down the drain in an instant for that racist asshole. I didn't owe you anything after that, maldito idiota!”
Daryl stopped in his tracks, instantly regretting starting up this particular argument. You spoke nothing but the truth. You didn't owe him anything. After all, it was him who walked out on you. He chose to let Merle's judgement get to him and influence his relationship. Hell, if it weren't for Merle, he would have proposed to you. He already had a ring picked out and everything back then, but he let Merle ruin everything. It was his own stupidity that cost him two years of his children's lives.
“Mama?”
At the sound of a small, timid voice coming from behind you, both you and Daryl turned and came face to face with your kids, your two year old twins. Your son, Luka, was nervously looking up at you and Daryl while your daughter, Camilla, was standing behind him, holding his hand.
Daryl was struck by the similarities both children shared with him. They both had his eyes, and his hair colour. They were spitting images of him. There was no doubt in his mind that these two children were his. He wasn't blind. He could see they were.
“Everything's fine, amores. I'm just having a conversation with Mr Dixon.”
Camilla stepped forward, her eyes lighting up with wonder. She looked up at Daryl, a smile spreading across her chubby cheeks. “Dixon?” she asked, pointing up at him. “Papa?”
Daryl was surprised. He looked up at you in confusion, silently asking for an explanation. You sent him a strained smile, forcing a relaxed look in front of your children.
“I always talk about you. They deserve to know who their father is. Well, who he was before he left me,” you explained, looking back down at Camilla and Luka.
“Papa?” Luka asked as he stepped forward, his blue eyes that reflected Daryl's sparkling with wonder. “Our papa?”
Daryl looked at you for permission, not wanting to overstep any boundaries. You nodded, silently giving him permission. He was their dad, after all, and he had just as much right to have a relationship with them as you, even if he did leave you. However, that was between him and you, and your children didn't deserve to be denied a relationship with their dad because of it.
The archer bent down, looking between Luka and Camilla as they stared at him in wonder. “Yeah, m'yer papa. M'sorry I wasn't here before, but m'here now. I ain't goin' nowhere.”
Daryl wasn't sure how much of his speech they understood, if they understood anything at all, but it didn't matter. The speech was mainly meant for you. It was to let you know that he wanted to be a part of their lives, and there was just about nothing that could stop him from that.
Camilla and Luka, as if having some sort of twin power, both simultaneously rushed forward and into his arms. Daryl wasted no time in hugging them back, somehow managing to pick them both up and rest them comfortably in his arms. It was relatively late, nearly eight at night and well past their bed times, so they rested their heads on his shoulders, making Daryl's heart swell with fondness. They didn't even know him, only having heard of him through the stories you told them, but they already trusted him. And even though he just found out he had kids, he would kill for them.
“We need to talk, sunshine. This ain't somethin' we can just sweep under the rug,” he told you, allowing you to take Luka from his arms to lighten the load. He adjusted his hold on Camilla, letting out a fond chuckle when he heard her yawn and nuzzle her face deeper into his shoulder.
You let out a sigh and nodded. “I know. But let's get these dormilones to bed first.”
Approximately half an hour later, the twins were tucked into bed and asleep. You and Daryl were back in the kitchen, both having a glass of wine in your hands—liquid courage for the conversation you were about to have.
“M'sorry fer leavin' ya,” Daryl broke the silence first, nervously sloshing the liquid around in his glass. “I dun' even know why I did. Merle's opinions should've never influenced our relationship. I loved ya. I still do. I regret leavin' ya more than anythin' else in my life.”
You inhaled deeply, willing the tears away. For two years you had wanted an explanation, and now you were finally getting one. However, hearing him admit that he still loved you, that you weren't stupid for still loving the man who broke your heart, was both relieving and hurtful.
“You hurt me, Daryl,” you whispered, feeling a lump form in your throat. “I get that Merle was your brother, but you should've never let him influence you like that. I had to go through everything alone. Do you know how hard it was being pregnant and fighting for my life against the dead out there? Do you know how terrified I was? I was lucky enough to find Alexandria a couple of days before I gave birth. If I didn't, I would've given birth out there with the walkers. I probably would've died. Camilla and Luka too.”
Daryl felt the guilt gnawing at his insides. He really hated himself at that moment. “M'sorry, sweetheart. I really fuckin' am. I promise I won't leave again. I dun' expect you to give me a second chance. God knows I dun' deserve it, but I promise I'll be here fer ya and the lil ones. I ain't ever gon' let ya down again, I promise.”
You gave him a small smile, reaching over to take his hand in yours. You rubbed your thumb over his knuckles, something you always did whenever the two of you had a serious talk. “Give me some time, Daryl. I still love you, but I need some time to adjust to the idea of 'us' again. It's been just me and the twins for two years. As far as I knew before today, I thought I wouldn't see you ever again. Just focus on the kids for now, okay? They deserve to know their daddy.”
Daryl's lips twitched up into a smile, and he nodded. “I'll wait as long as ya need me to. I ain't ever gon' let anyone influence us ever again, I can assure ya of tha'. And I ain't ever gon' leave ya to raise 'em alone, never.”
➳༻❀✿❀༺➳
¡No me toques!: Don't touch me!
Translations (May be incorrect! Please feel free to correct me if they are!):
maldito idiota!: fucking idiot!
amores: loves.
dormilones: sleepyheads.
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pepsiboyy · 20 hours
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HEARTBEAT - part one
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pairing: chris sturniolo x fem!reader summary: after moving to massachusetts from florida, y/n lives with her half brother, nathan doe, who is part of a small garage band. their sassy guitarist, chris sturniolo, can't help but get on her nerves. but there's something about him. warnings: use of y/n lol, mentions of drug abuse, cursing, angst a/n: NEW SERIES ugh i hope you guys LOVE IT SO HARD i have been wanting to start this one for so long i would be in class brainstorming it AND NOW IM DONE WITH IN-PERSON SCHOOL so yayy i hope you guys love it!!!!! sincerely, apollo <3
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"are you even listening?"
my eyes ripped from the window to my right.
"yeah, sorry." i mumbled.
massachusetts was so different from florida. it was so much cooler, and why is everything so close together?
i turned to my father, who i swear i only truly knew as a facebook post on my phone screen.
"i think your mom is gonna be so happy to hear that you-"
"she won't care." i chuckled softly as i took a deep breath and sighed, shrugging. "it's okay though. i'm trying to move past that."
as much as i loved my mother, i knew she was bad for me.
my mom was a major drug addict. i fearfully called the cops and child protective services upon finding her in a mental state i had never seen her in. after investigation and lots of court shit i didn't want to think about, i was sent to my father's. i never knew him personally. it was never anything toxic, we talked on social media. but he left shortly after i was born and had a son with a new woman.
my half brother, nathan doe, sat beside me scrolling on his phone.
i had never really spoken to him. he seemed like somebody i might get along with, but i had yet to interact with him.
i guess we would see how it goes.
terrible. it goes terrible. i sat in their guest bedroom for about fourty-five minutes, digging through all of my belongings to find my phone charger. i definitely forgot it.
with a deep sigh, i ran my fingers through my hair and stood to my feet quickly and made my way down the stairs and to the kitchen, where everyone was sitting. i blinked a few times.
"uhh.. hey?" i chuckled awkwardly, biting my lip before burying my hands into my hoodie's pockets. "so um.. i'm gonna run to that gas station we passed on the way here, i'll just walk, i need the fresh air." i breathed.
everyone seemed to exchange looks before they nodded and my dad stood up. "call me if you need anything."
i simply nodded and waved at everyone before heading out the door with a soft sigh, unknowingly slamming the door behind me.
the boston breeze really began to sting about halfway through the walk, even if it were only about three minutes i had really been walking. my headphones hugged my head and played loudly, blasting some of my favorite songs that i had on a playlist to calm down.
there was no reason i should have been so angry, but i think it's just the new environment truly getting to me.
i pulled open the door to the gas station and removed my hood, looking around. my eyes turned to the boy working at the counter, whose eyes were glued to his phone. i turned to look for a charger for my own phone, biting my lip in focus and frowning at the prices. "so expensive.. this is unfair." i scoffed to myself.
after grabbing the two boxes, one being a brick and the other being the cord, i let out a frustrated sigh and set them on the counter, a little harsher than i had anticipated to.
"woah there, i'm sensing some aggression. boyfriend start an argument or what?"
i turned to the boy working, my eyes wide. "excuse me?" i stared at him for a brief moment before scoffing and shaking my head. "none of your business, can you just ring me up please?" i stated firmly, getting out my card and inserting it into the reader.
after pressing a few buttons on the screen on his side, he threw his hands up in defense. "relax sweetheart, i'm just yanking your chain."
"what-?" i stared at him with an expression of disgust, pulling my card out and shoving it into my wallet angrily. i looked at his nametag and squinted slightly.
the boy set the two boxes into a bag and handed them to me, where i gripped the bag and stared at him. "i'm not your sweetheart, chris." i emphasized, quickly leaving and not turning around at the sound of him laughing to himself.
the knock at my door caused me to jump slightly, and i quickly sat up to make my way towards the sound. "what's up?"
i blinked when i saw nate looking at me, the hat on his head backwards and his sleeveless shirt loose on him.
"hey, so.." he blinked a few times as he looked away then back at me. "sorry, i know we haven't spoken much. but um. i'm part of a little band?" he mumbled, and i nodded and leaned against the doorframe as i listened closely. "i figured i should let you know, tuesdays and thursdays we play in the garage, we usually stop at about ten o'clock though, so.." he trailed off.
i looked at him and furrowed my eyebrows before looking at my phone, shrugging softly before setting it back in my pocket. i'm already forgetting the days of the week. couldn't have told anybody today was tuesday.
"that's okay with you, right?"
"yeah, of course. do your thing, man." i smiled reassuringly, and nate's entire expression visibly lit up a bit.
"'preciate it a lot, y/n. you're welcome to sit in and watch if you're interested."
i quickly shook my head and waved a hand. "no no, it's okay. i have some things to do anyway."
nate nodded and waved before he turned and headed down the stairs.
i shut the door and made my way back to my bed, yawning softly. nate seemed very sweet. i don't doubt we will get along in any way, i'm just awkward. and it seems like he is a bit too. pretty sure our dad is, too.
i sighed as i curled up in bed, watching youtube.
11:12pm. it was an hour and twelve minutes past the given time, and all i could hear was sound. just sound. below me.
i was growing frustrated with each second that went by.
fed up, i stood to my feet and stomped out of my room and down the stairs, allowing my arms to hug myself. i was wearing shorts and a baggy tee. the sound grew louder with each step that i took.
i swung open the garage door and looked at nate, slamming the drums, an unfamiliar figure strumming the bass, and-
"hey, y/n," nate stated as he stopped his movements and gave me a toothy smile.
i swear my face went pale.
"this is ben, and this is chris-"
"your name's y/n?" chris stated, his expression equally as shocked as he lowered his arms from his deep red guitar.
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cosmicluvcore · 2 days
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To be human part 2
Rottmnt Leo x reader, gender neutral, friends to lovers, himbo Leo (?), one sided pining
Part 1 here
Summary: Leo has the biggest crush on you but he's afraid that you'd never date a mutant, so with the help of a clooking broach he plans to become your perfect human boyfriend!
Idk if you can tell but this is kinda Aladdin inspired
Also I wasn't sure abt posting this since it has no Y/N interactions umm so sorry if you're dissapointed
I promise the next one will have fluffy moments between Y/N and Leo!! Sorry this is short
Tag list!!
@lunaflyer @wings-of-sapphire @ssak-i @nessarolla-in-constant-flux @envyjmoney
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"¿Qué hice para merecer esto?" Is what the disgruntled Señor Hueso muttered under his breath, as he watched Leo come crashing into his restaurant.
Of all the times that mutant decides to show up, it had to be on a good day. A loud sigh left the skeleton's mouth as he watched the turtle bump into one of his waiters, knocking all the dishes out of her hand.
"Señor! Señor!" Leo called out eagerly as he approached, "I have a really, really important request and you have to-"
He was interrupted by Hueso placing his hand up, narrowing his eyes in annoyance.
"Instead of disturbing my guests, Pepino, let's talk in the staff room."
~
Leo was still wiping spilled spaghetti off himself as he spoke. Amazingly, that didn't stop his excited flow.
"Señor, bone head, buddy! Long time no see, right?" Leo asked in an overly friendly manner, offering Hueso a hand.
Hueso glanced at his hand, which had marinara sauce on it, before glancing back at Leo with an unimpressed expression.
"Uf hijo, did you just come here to cause trouble?" He asked rather bluntly.
Leo chuckled to himself, "Of course not! I just came here for a little... help."
"Help?" Hueso repeated, tilting his head as he watched Leo's over excited behavior.
"Yeah, I was wondering if you could help me get my hands on a cloaking brooch." He explained briefly while wiping away the bit of sauce that was on his shoulder.
"A cloaking brooch?" Hueso repeated raising his brow, "Why would you need one of those? I've seen you walk among humans like it's nothing."
"It's not for that."
Leo bit his lip unsure whether he should let the truth spill, no one knew of his little crush and he was afriad if he started talking about them he wouldn't know when to stop. So he took the easier route.
"It's for uh- You know... science." He lied, smiling awkwardly as if that made his reply more believable.
Señor Hueso simply shot him an unconvinced expression.
"Este idiota..." The skeleton muttered under his breath, "Why don't you just say why you really want it? It would save you from the embarrassment of lying to my face."
Yeah, Hueso wasn't buying it. Figures.
"Okay okay, I'll admit that wasn't my best performance," Leo said with a grin, although his trade mark smirk faded into a small frown as Hueso stared back at him with narrowed eyes.
"Truth is I'm trying to impress someone..." He admitted quietly, his gaze darting to the ground, while he fidgeted with his hands sheepishly.
Hueso blinked in surprise at the turtles sudden shyness, "Trying to impress someone?" He repeated curiously, looking back to the blushing turtle for futher confimration.
Leo bit his lip, his heart fluttering at the thought of them, "A human." He confessed softly.
"I've never felt this way about anyone before, they're just perfect in every way!" He explained brightly, though his happy expression faultered, "But, I don't think they'd be interested in, this whole situation." He frowned, gesturing to himself.
Hueso nodded slowly as he listened, "I see," He hummed in reply, looking thoughtful as he considered Leo's situation for a moment, "So you want to pretend to be human and lie to them?"
Leo frowned at the skeletons blutness, "It's not a lie! I'm just... bending... the truth," He said, his brow furrowing as he spoke.
Even he didn't believe himself this time.
"Alright it's kinda a lie, but what other chance do I have?"
"I don't know, tell them the truth?" Hueso retorted, Leo couldn't help but roll his eyes as he was lectured on the obvious answer, "If you really think this person is worth it, then you should be honest with them."
"The last thing I need to be is honest." The turtle insisted stubbornly, his expression souring at the idea of even attemping to tell his crush how he felt.
Leo hated to picture it, he hated that he knew his voice would tremble as he would try his best to convey to them how deeply he felt.
He hated how he knew he would stammer over his words as he scrambled to find the best way to express his feelings.
And then he would have to wait impatiently for their reply, fearing the worst, after this new discovery.
Not like he could blame Y/N.
Who wouldn't turn down a nervous idiot? And why would anyone ever be interested in someone who looks like him?
"I don't want to risk losing them." Leo finally said, sighing before meeting Hueso gaze again with a serious expression.
"Look, all I need is a brooch. I just want a chance to be with them and make them happy. Please, Señor?"
As Hueso watched Leo's sad expression he was still unsure how to reply, he knew this was an awful idea yet Leo seemed so attached to it. The puppy dog eyes that the blue masked turtle was giving him eventually casused a defeated sigh escape Hueso's mouth.
"Fine, I have a spare somewhere around here," Hueso muttered reluctantly, too tired to keep pushing, turning to his desk and opening a drawer, "Just don't blame me when things go terribly wrong."
Leo's expression immediately brightened.
"Really?!" He leaned over Señor Hueso's shoulder, eagerly watching as the skeleton searched.
Eventually, Hueso found it, a gold gemstone-adorned brooch.
As Leo looked at the badazzled brooch, excitement began to bubble in his chest, the glamorous item really did make this whole situation seem a lot cooler. This was his key to being Y/N's perfect romantic partner, something he'd dreamed of for far too long that was now finally a possibility. His heart soared at the thought.
"Here," Hueso said, handing him the brooch, "Try not to get spaghetti on it, Pepino."
Leo was practically vibrating with excitement as the brooch was placed into his hands. He nodded at Hueso's words despite not really hearing them.
"Thanks Señor! I can keep this right?" He asked.
"Just don't damage it." Hueso warned in reply, "If you do, it could stop-"
But before he got the chance to finish his words, Leo had disappeared into another blue portal.
"-working..."
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someoneinjersey · 1 day
Text
re: jon bernthal
I like him. I support him. Are there things about him I don't agree with? Sure. But I possess the critical thinking skills to be able to think about someone else's perspective.
He's a Jewish man. I'm sure the decision for him to support Israel (if he does, I haven't seen any definitive evidence except that he had an Israeli soldier on his podcast at some point) comes from a really complicated place. One of my closest friends from 5th grade to graduation is Jewish. Her parents even met at a kibbutz. She works for an organization to help Jewish people in America take trips to Israel. While her FB is private (and I left FB a long time ago), I wouldn't doubt for a second she supports Israel. But she was always one of the kindest and most generous people I ever knew, and I don't think she'd support anything blindly. I think Jewish people in the US are in a really rough spot right now and we need to recognize that as much as we recognize that the country of Israel is committing genocide. It's not as black and white for them as we non-Jewish folks want it to be.
Jon gave a domestic abuser a platform on his podcast. Yeah. A guy who he was friends with who was terrible and went through rehab and therapy and came out with a different perspective. I personally don't like that actor but I didn't enjoy him much after Transformers anyway. If we're close to someone and they do something bad, we usually give them a second chance, maybe more. We're supposed to support growth and change especially with those close to us. In my own life I still spoke to my abusive father for a time after my parents divorced and was at his bedside the day he passed. Another person close to me was accused of SA but I'd known them their whole life and couldn't fathom it being true so I stood by them. That's just life. Life is so fucking complicated.
Jon supports the police and the military. Of course he does, most of the country does and he's played a cop/detective/soldier like a dozen times in his career and spent a ton of time with them to learn about the jobs and the cultures within them. I'm pretty sure that's the first thing people got on his ass for -- not being all ACAB from the start and then later featuring police on his podcast etc. AGAIN, when you KNOW people, it's a lot harder to draw those black and white lines. I'm for defunding the police and reallocating the money for more productive services, I'm against police violence, I'm against the mass incarceration of minorities for minor infractions, I'm against prison slavery, all that shit, and I hate that stupid "thin blue line" nonsense. But I'm not gonna go up to every cop I know and tell them they're a piece of shit. I'm not gonna NOT call the cops when the local addicts go on a B&E spree to steal shit to pay their dealers (true story, we only didn't get robbed because someone is always home).
PLEASE fucking think critically and PLEASE realize that not everything is black and white and PLEASE let people enjoy shit that brings them happiness in this shitty fucking world.
And I'm not looking for arguments or debates on this, thanks.
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Ok so no prompt for the list for this one, but it's been rattling around in my brain for a little bit:
Adam has been stuck at the hotel for a bit, and him and Lucifer seem to be constantly fighting. Luci is constantly setting Adam off with jabs at his insecurities (the intent being lighthearted bickering, maybe even flirting, but he's Lucifer and his communication skills are shit), and Adam's response to being hurt is anger, so he always lashes out.
Once, after a particularly exhausting week, Adam doesn't have enough energy to get angry. So when Lucifer says something in an attempt to get a rise out of him (maybe a comment about Cain or Abel? Could be anything), instead of snapping at him or yelling, Adam just starts crying. He doesn't even realise it at first, but he's just so goddamn tired that he can't bring himself to get angry, and the hurt comes out a different way.
Lucifer goes to comfort him, but Adam refuses his support, asking him if he's happy now, if he got what he wanted. Luci doesn't understand, because he never realised that his words were hurting Adam.
From there it can go any which way, they make up there, Adam seeks comfort elsewhere (maybe Angel?? Holydust friends <33), Charlie getting angry at her dad, anything could happen!! It's all up to you :)
Indigo (*sticking Adam in the blender (/affectionate)*)
An angsty Adam smoothie, delicious!
Adam burst into tears, this was the shit cherry on the the shitty cake. All he wanted was to go to bed but no, this asshole has to say something to him. About his kids no less, his one major sore spot. "Are you fucking happy now asshole?! You made me cry you got what you wanted."
Lucifer stood there, stunned that he had actually made Adam cry. He was just teasing like he always did. He thought his teasing came off as flirting, he loved getting a rise out of Adam he was so cute when he was mad. The way his face flushed, his golden eyes held the emotion, his nose crinkled in the cutest way.
He was adorable.
Now though, maybe Lucifer was coming off more mean then he meant to.
Angel placed a hand on Adams shoulder and rubbed circle's on the sinners back. Even he was shocked by what the devil said, low blow about the guys kids.
"DAD!" Charlie scolded. "Apologize, there was no need for that."
Lucifer looked at Adam, guilt pooled in his heart. Well fuck. "I was just teasing like always, you know I didn't mean anything by it."
Adam scoffed and sniffed. "Yeah, cause saying I'm a fucking failure as a parent is real funny asshole." Okay, maybe he didn't say exactly that but that's how Adam took it.
Lucifer winced, yeah that was a low blow even for him.
"Why would you even fucking say that?"
"I like arguing with you. It's how we work, how we communicate." How we flirt, he added mentally.
"I would never look at you and say you're a shitty dad, even when you left her alone for seven fucking years." Okay yeah, Lucifer crossed a line.
"You're right. I crossed a line and I'm sorry. What happened to your boys wasn't your fault, you did the best you could with what you had at the time." Lucifer said, he really felt bad. "How about I make it up to you? Tomorrow we can go and do anything you want. My treat."
Adam blinked away his tears. "Anything?"
"Anything." The way Adam smirked at him told him all he needed to know.
He was really going to pay for this one wasn't he?
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apollosfavkiddo · 11 hours
Text
⛧° Cooking classes with Uncle Leo
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⛧° 。 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆༺♱༻⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ 。°⛧
content: leo valdez x fem!reader blurb
warnings: probably cursing, bad spanish, not proofread. ig that's it?? lmk!!
a/n: i didn't really like this, but i'm posting it anyways lol. dedicated to covey and @/pinkdiorluvr cuz i know they both love leo hehehe
⛧° 。 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆༺♱༻⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ 。°⛧
You never learnt how to cook. A disturbed childhood with a shitty mortal dad was not the best place to get cooking lessons. Or to learn anything, on that matter.  
The point is, cooking skills aren’t something you possess, and that annoys you beyond limits. That took you to asking your best friend, Leo Valdez, for cooking classes. Which he immediately accepted. I mean, who wouldn’t want to teach your crush how to cook? 
"So, when can I go to your house?” You asked, which made him snap back to reality from just admiring your features.  
“Uh... my house?” He asked, as he completely forgot what you guys were previously chatting about. He was too busy with noticing how the freckles coated your cheeks, and how your black hair framed your face in the prettiest way possible. Oh, he was down bad.  
“Are you even listening to me right now, Leo?” You asked, waving your hand in front of his face. 
“Uh, yeah, ‘course I am. You were talking about the... cooking classes, right?” He asked, a sheepish smile making his way to his lips. You just rolled your eyes. 
“Yes, I am. When can I come to your house, hm?” You asked again. 
“Tomorrow at seven sounds good to you?” He asked. 
“Yeah, that’d be great.” You answer, smiling softly as well.  
“You’re gonna learn how to make the perfect pasta alla carbonara, my dear apprentice. It's one of my specialties.” He said, passing an arm across your shoulders and pulling you to him.  
Before you could even pull away so you could leave, he planted a kiss with a loud ‘mwah’ to it and darted off, laughing. You were left confused, blushing and smiling as a toddler who just got a pack of candy.  
⛧° 。 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆༺♱༻⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ 。°⛧ 
Leo stood in his kitchen, a grin plastered on his face as he waited for his best friend’s arrival. He was looking forward to it, since he knew that it was a chance of absolutely zero percent that this whole class didn’t end in absolute chaos.  
He leaned against the counter, tapping his fingers impatiently, trying to figure when you’d finally come, what clothes you’d be wearing, what shoes you’d wear and in which way your hair would be. Would it be down? Would you put it in a ponytail? A bun? A braid? 
Oh gods, he was such a sucker for that damned daughter of Poseidon.  
Eventually, he heard the rhythmic knock on the door, telling him that you were finally there, much to his happiness.  
“Come on, Valdez, it’s freezing out here!” You complained, just when he finally opened the door and you barged inside, escaping the snow from the outside world. You were in a black coat, wine-red leggings, gloves and a cute scarf so your nose didn’t get too cold. “Finally! Thought you’d leave me out there to die.” 
“I’d never do that, princesa. I mean, at least not today, I need an assistant.” He said jokingly, poking your shoulder and teasing you as you took your coat off.  
“I’m gonna punch you, I swear to all the gods that I know.” She threatened. He just smiled and walked towards the kitchen, with you following right behind him. “So, what’re you gonna teach me today?”  
“We’re gonna make the best pasta ever – carbonara!” He said happily as he pointed at the counter, which was filled with ingredients for the dish – bacon, eggs, flour and cheese were neatly organized in the counter, ready to be turned into a meal. 
“If this goes wrong, I'm ordering a happy meal.” You complained, putting the things you brought to make your favorite dessert, a classic that you learnt with a Brazilian friend of yours – Brigadeiro. It's actually the only thing that you can cook without burning down the whole house.  
“First, we gotta make the pasta.” The latino said, and you grimaced. 
“Why do we have to make it? Isn't it easier to just, you know, buy the pasta and cook it?”  
He shrugged. “Yeah, it’s easier. But making it is so much fun!” He said, with a smile on his face, and started pouring flour on the counter, making a small tower and soon making a hole in it. Then he stopped and looked at you. 
“What? Is there something on my hair?” You asked, brushing off your hair, which made Leo laugh. 
“No, no. I need you to grab six eggs and crack them here.” He said, gesturing towards the bowl.  
“Oh.” You mumbled and picked up the bowl, cracking the eggs in it and being extra careful with the shell. When you finished, you looked at him with puppy eyes. “What now?”  
“Put them here.” He said, gesturing to the hole in the flour. You nodded and poured the eggs there. “Now, you washed your hands, right?” You nodded again. “Great. Now, you have to mix the eggs and the flour until we have a smooth dough; the pasta!” 
You just nodded and put your hands to work. It was cute, since you didn’t seem to know what you were doing, and it was just so cute the way you were unsure on whether you were doing the right thing or not.  
“You’re doing great, y/n/n.” He assured. If you looked up, you’d see a proud smile on his face. 
After a few minutes of squeezing and mixing the dough, it was finally ready. You looked up at Leo’s face, a proud smile on your face and shining eyes. Maybe cooking wasn’t really that bad, after all. Not if you had a good teacher and friend around. 
He was starstruck. He couldn’t even move. You were just so pretty, flour all over your arms and hands, a little spot on your cheek white from when you rubbed the back of your hand on your face. He wanted nothing more than to kiss you in that moment.  
But he knew he couldn’t. He shouldn’t do it. Couldn't risk his friendship with you.  
And yet you were so tempting, so pretty like that. In his kitchen, with his apron – which was slightly too big for your tiny frame – and with him.  
“So, what do we do now?” You asked, interrupting the trance he was in. He shook his head and blushed, embarrassed to be caught like that.  
“Uh... the- the eggs. We need to make the eggs.” He said, blushing after getting caught staring at you. “You can whisk the yolks while I cook the bacon. Is that alright with you?”  
“Mhm. You just need to teach me how to separate the yolks.” You said, with a smile.  
You two continued the cooking, with Leo cooking the bacons till they were golden brown and crispy while you whisked the egg yolks and the cheese together. It was a fun night, where you ate the food you made – which was delicious, by the way – and had fun with your best friend. 
The only out of the ordinary thing was that the whole time you were there, the only thing you wanted was to jump on Leo’s lap and kiss the hell out of him.  
And his train of thought was not that far away from yours. 
Don't get me wrong, he loved to spend platonic time with you, of course. But he really, really wanted to kiss you.  
‘Oh, for my father’s sake, what I wouldn’t give to kiss her.’  
“...what?” You asked, your face clearly redder with his – more than sudden – confession.  
You never thought he’d want to kiss you, much less give yourself the hope that maybe someday that’d happen. No, it was selfish, and you knew – or at least thought – that he’d never ever like his best friend.  
But here he was, saying how much he’d give in exchange for a kiss.  
“Oh, shit- I said that out loud, didn’t I? I’m so sorry, Y/n, you can really pretend this never happened, I just-” AAAAAND he was rambling. Again. So, the easiest way out of that situation was, obviously, shut him up with a kiss.  
He immediately melted. His hands stopped flying around his face and went to graze your neck and waist, unsure, but ready to search.  
It was one of the best kisses you’ve ever had, and it was definitely the most awaited one. His lips were cracked and raspy, and he tasted sweet like the juice you had.  
When you finally pulled away, both of your cheeks were red and there was a smile playing on both of your lips.  
“I kinda love you.” You admited.  
“Good, ‘cause i love you too, princesa.” 
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ruified · 3 days
Text
the long awaited review of storm bringer
sorry this took me so long to do i had some stuff happening
THIS ONE WILL BE LONG SO GET READY!!
Bang!
A hollow blast echoed through the street.
Chuuya stood stock-still as numerous bloodlike streams slid down his head-from multicolored party streamers.
"Happy one-year Port Mafia anniversary, Chuuya!" The pool hall rang with the five men's cheerful shouts. Chuuya looked around the room with an annoyed glare.
"..What is wrong with you people?"
first of all i love the flags dearly, i always have ever since i saw the stageplay but the ln really just sealed the deal for me <3
of course, getting attached was a BAD IDEA but anyway
"Now I get it!" His voice was unnecessarily loud. "You thought you could pull a fast one on me, showin' me this so I'd get all weepy and apologize! That's what's goin' on, isn't it?!"
"Hmm? No, actually, we—"
now here we have chuuya not believing the gift from the flags he received was genuine and it makes me wonder how more distrustful he had become since joining the pm :(
Up until a few minutes ago, there were six people in the room... but now there were seven.
"No need to clap," said the seventh man.
I LOVED ADAMS ENTRANCE SO MUCH MORE IN THE LN ITS SO FUNNY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH he’s so silly guys live laugh love adam frankenstein
"Chuuya, you cannot defeat Verlaine alone, which is why I was sent here. He is no ordinary assassin. Paul Verlaine is the king of assassins—and your elder brother."
now i just find it interesting that despite not biologically being related, adam still refers to paul as chuuya’s brother
i always thought paul was simply a self proclaimed brother but adam’s wording suggests otherwise
"Yeah, this is my problem," began Chuuya, standing in front of the closed door. "But if something like this happened to one of you guys, I don't think I could just ignore it. I'd try to help whether you liked it or not; I bet the rest of you'd feel the same way. So, detective, spit it out and tell them, too, or I'm not gonna cooperate."
The group stared at him, wide-eyed and impressed.
"Hey, did you guys hear that?" asked Piano Man.
"I did," Iceman said with a nod.
"I forgot to turn on my tape recorder." Lippmann gave a faint smirk.
"Tsk. On second thought, I'm just gonna handle this on my own."
"No way, man! No take-backs! I'm not letting you out that door."
this was so cute guys, i love the moment of vulnerability and the way they tease him like older brothers
It was Dazai's dark figure. Chuuya tried calling out to him, straining his voice, until he finally regained consciousness.
He was lying in front of that pool hall: Old World. He was no longer focused on Dazai but the inside of the hall. The undeniable stench of blood filled the air.
it’s the fact that he knew to bring him to old world which on the one hand is sweet but the other hand it’s… suspicious
"I'm gonna save you! Hold on!"
It was evident that there was no saving him, even without getting closer for a better look. His abdomen was torn open, exposing his ribcage.
"I'm sorry, Chuuya... He got me. I can't see... I can't even feel my legs anymore," Albatross gurgled in a whisper. His eyes were no longer seeing the world of the living. His legs were crushed from the knees down as well.
"But I saved Doc. I grabbed him by the collar and pulled him out of the attack's way," said Albatross. "Everyone else is dead.
And I'm gonna die, too. But Doc... He needs your help..."
Albatross's right hand was clutching onto Doc's collar like a treasure he held dear. Doc's eyes were closed as if he were sleep-ing, and he didn't have a scratch on his body—his upper body, that is. There was nothing left of Doc from the waist down.
"…"
Chuuya groaned and clenched his jaw tight. He had to consciously fight the urge to scream.
"All right," Chuuya replied evenly, keeping his emotions at bay.
"I'll take care of Doc. He's gonna be okay thanks to you. You always were amazing like that. You should be proud."
albatross’ death actually made me ill so i’m sharing it with you all now
"Yeah, it's true." His voice rang of bitterness. It sounded as if he would have rather died than admit it. "But I can't get in touch with him. Whatever. Hope he's dead in a ditch somewhere."
"I see." I, however, believed that we would be in trouble if we lost an ideal player for the mission. "Can you trust this individual?"
"Trust him? No way," Master Chuuya spat. "He's a real piece of shit. Got a twisted personality to go with it, too. He's the kind of guy who'd try to sell water to someone who was drowning. What makes him even scarier, though, is that he'd actually pull it off. He's sharp in a bad kind of way. But we won't be able to beat Verlaine without him."
i love the way he describes dazai it’s so funny
Those who knew Dazai didn't dare come near his home-not even his Port Mafia subordinates-and not because of how eerie the area was. Rather, nobody knew how Dazai would react when someone invaded his private space. Perhaps he would tear off their limbs and kill them, or perhaps he would welcome them with open arms and a cup of tea. Nobody could understand how Dazai worked.
what a goofy fella
"Charming place you have here, Dazai," came a lighthearted voice. "What frightens you so much that you choose to live in such a dreary place? Real estate tax?"
verlaine says this… we’re supposed to be scared of this guy? BRO IS GOOFY
"Gimme your pen."
"Be my guest."
After grabbing the pen that was handed to him, Chuuya effortlessly scrawled something within the signature column at the bottom of the document. When the detective leaned forward to check the signature, he was met with the following words:
Eat shit.
Chuuya then tossed the pen on the desk, wrapped his arms behind his head, leaned back in his chair, and put his feet up.
he’s such an ass i love him so much
"I see." A self-deprecating smirk played on his lips. "But, detective..."
Chuuya's eyes had clouded over, shrouded in darkness.
"…you should probably save your sympathy for a fellow human."
he was already questioning his humanity despite not having been to the lab yet and it hurts so bad guys :(
"Chuuya's not with you? Good grief. He's even late to important events like this." Verlaine's tone was casual and carefree, even. "I bet he would show up late to a first date, too. You know, as his brother, I worry about him. Sigh..."
verlaine doing shit like this again
"He—Chuuya—was wearing a military uniform I think he stole from somewhere. He was a huge mess. His face and hair were filthy. He wasn't wearing shoes, either," Shirase continued, voice quavering. "We—the Sheep's original members—thought he was some orphan living on the streets. He spoke to us first.
"What's that square thing?' is what he said."
Shirase looked down at the ground as if he was desperately trying to remember every detail that happened that day.
"I had no idea what he was talking about... I thought he was just weird. That's when he said, 'Tell me what that square thing is in your hand. Right now.'"
Shirase lifted his gaze and idly stared into the distance.
"I was holding a slice of bread."
A deep silence reigned over the corridor, eerily so, especially after the destruction that preceded it. Verlaine quietly listened to the story.
"When I told him it was bread, he asked, 'Can you eat it?' Then when I went 'Yeah' and tore off a piece and ate it to show him, he did the last thing I was expecting him to do. He fainted, like he was out of batteries. It wasn't until I went over to check up on him that I noticed how skinny he was. He looked half dead. The others were weirded out and didn't want anything to do with him, but I gave him bread and some water. After convincing the group, I took him with me to the Sheep hideout in the sewers."
chuuya nakahara you are sickening
"Hey, don't look so worried! It'll be fine! I was the brains of the Sheep, and you're gonna have me on your side now, so there's nothing to worry about! I'll help you find the next target in no time!"
My arithmetic operator indicated it was highly probable Shirase was not the brains of anything but simply was useless in every other regard. I immediately shut down the operation. I did not want to know the truth.
I LOVE ADAM SO MUCH HES SO FUNNY
Master Chuuya watched Shirase flail his arms about for a full ten seconds before deeply sighing.
"What are you lookin' at me like that for?!" Shirase demanded.
"Nothing... If I told ya, it'd just make things worse," Master Chuuya said before averting his gaze.
they’re so childish too i love them
"Sigh... Somebody call a wahmbulance for this guy, seriously."
chuuya making fun of shirase again
Verlaine stood in mute amazement for a few moments before nodding as if he had figured out what was going on. "Now I get it. I finally see how you two did it."
Master Chuuya and Dazai stood side by side. There was something surprisingly perfect about it.
Two young men with completely different personalities...
they’re so meant for each other guys it’s crazy
"You messed with the wrong guy, Verlaine," Dazai said with a faint smirk. "I know exactly how to deal with someone who can manipulate gravity. Day in and day out, I've spent every waking and sleeping moment think about how I can annoy Chuuya."
he’s literally obsessed with him
After staring in mute amazement for a brief moment, his lips eased into a smile.
"Show-off."
It was an annoyed yet relieved smile. He then promptly began giving orders into the radio.
"Everyone, prepare for battle. Chuuya is heading toward the target."
why is he as a man amazed by another man
"Incredible," a dumbfounded Dazai muttered as he watched from the top of the gas tank. "So this is the power of Arahabaki."
like he literally is so captivated by chuuya throughout this entire scene, every time they mention dazai it’s like “he watched in absolute awe” or something
"So that's Arahabaki's—that's Chuuya's true form," Dazai muttered feverishly as he stared up from the surface.
he’s so down bad
After limply floating in the air for a few sec-onds, the wings on Chuuya's back vanished, and he slowly began to fall.
Until Dazai caught him.
"Sleep well, Chuuya." Dazai faintly smiled at him. "I forgot to bring a pen with me, so I won't draw on your face this time. You're welcome."
down terrible
"Wish you were me, huh? A future king needs a big city to set up base, after all!" Shirase gloated. "I learned something from all this. The mechanical detective that died, the king of assassins— they were incredible. I couldn't believe people like them actually existed. The world really is a big place! That's why I'm gonna use the gemstones I stole from the research facility to set up a base in London! The next time you see me, I'm gonna be the king of an organization even bigger than the Port Mafia. I'll make sure to keep a position open for you, Chuuya."
guys shirase is such an idiot i love him so much
“the world really is a big place!” like no shit sherlock you’re just figuring this out?
"Would you like to hear an android joke, Master Chuuya?" Chuuya stood in utter disbelief, mouth agape in astonishment.
He eventually took in a deep breath—possibly the deepest he'd ever taken. Then all of a sudden, he cracked a smile...
"Ha-ha-ha!"
...and laughed.
CHUUYA CARES ABOUT ADAM AND I SNIFF SNIFFLE EUGHHH
"I'm sorry, Rimbaud," he said in almost a whisper as he clenched his jaw. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't treat you like the friend you were. I'm sorry I couldn't thank you for the present you gave me on my birthday. And now that you're no longer here... Now I'm just so terribly sad."
Verlaine's voice trembled as he lifted his head to the heavens and closed his eyes. He kept still. For the longest time, he remained there facing the night sky.
RIMLAINE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
He had no interest in the outside world. There was nobody he wanted to kill or see. The only person he missed was Rimbaud, but he was gone.
THEY MAKE ME ILL
guys i love rimlaine so much they’re so important to me
anyways those were my quotes hehe hope you enjoyed uhhh GO READ STORMBRINGER ITS PHENOMENAL
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dontbesadsanaexist · 3 days
Text
𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒔 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒅 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈
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Jihyo x fem!reader
Warning: angst
Word count: 940
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"I like you."
Her eyes widened in surprise and her lips curved into a smile. "Me?" A few meters away from both of us we could hear loud voices and laughs, indicating that the others haven't left yet.
It wasn't supposed to be like that.
Yeah, I didn't want to say it in front of the school gate, where everybody could hear me. If I would've known what she was going to say I would've keep this to myself, and kept daydreaming about something that is never going to happen. But the temptation to even try something was to high.
So I waited.
After the drama class when everybody was leaving to go home. It was winter. As a result the night came quickly, and we had, for only lights outside, the bright glow of the street lamps.
Even though Chaeyoung was with me, I still felt my hands trembling, the hands I previously put in my pocket to warm myself.
She was the last one to passed the metal gate. Her bike by her side, she walked towards me and Chaeyoung, thinking we would do the ride home together as always.
"So, what did you want to tell me?"
Chaeyoung gave me a look that said everything. She was the one that has always encouraged me to confess. Coward as I am, that idea never crossed my mind. Until she brought it up one day, and it didn't seem to leave her head since then.
Her feet gave a small push on my leg to get me to talk.
"I- Can we go, like, far from the others? I don't want them to hear."
"Sorry, my parents expect me to be home in 15 minutes. Just tell me, they can't hear you from here."
That's right, she didn't know so of course she didn't expect it to be such a big deal.
Chaeyoung saw my nervousness. And as a good friend she is, she decided to spoke up for me.
"She likes a girl but she's too shy to tell you."
...What ?
My brain took some time to comprehend the information just as I heard jihyo giggle.
"It's just that? Who is it?"
I look up at Chaeyoung to ask some help but she just pushed me more to tell her.
"Come on, just say it."
A big sigh left past my lips as I played with my fingers. My eyes didn't dare to look into her owns. I thought that maybe, I was going to fall into some trance that I couldn't escape, like every time I stare at her.
"The person... is you."
"Me ? Really?"
I wasn't expecting such a quick response. When my eyes met hers she had that sort of glow in them, as if I just gave her the gift she'd always wanted.
The warmth at my side left as Chaeyoung grab her bag from the floor and put it on her shoulder.
"Finally, I'll leave you both alone now."
Son Chaeyoung what the fuck were you doing?!
That's what I wanted to say, but my lips where already sealed from the confession. My heart was beating loudly in my chest now that I was left with my long time crush. And by long time I mean 2 years.
I heard the sound of a bike's wheel moving. Jihyo was walking slowly, as if she was signaling me to follow her. The first seconds were an awkward silence. Until she broke it.
"How long has it been?"
"Two years, maybe? I mean, I've realized this year but.. Yeah it's been two years."
She let out a nervous chuckle and looked at me.
"Sorry, you know I'm het-"
"I know."
She nodded her head and kept her gaze on the floor.
"But I've already crushed on a girl, Sana, I think Chaeyoung already told you."
Yeah, you even kissed her. How is that suppose to be considered straight?
"I know that too."
She smiled as if it was going to save her from this embarrassing situation. We walked a bit more until it was time to go separate ways. Before I could turn my back she stopped me.
"You know, I'm happy that you told me."
I just hummed and turned away from her, ashamed of myself. I was so focused on wiping my wet cheeks that I didn't hear her shouting my name.
A buzz in my pocket brought me out of my thought. The screen lighted my face in the dark. It was a message.
-'Did Chaeyoung forced you to tell me?'
-'... A bit?'
I didn't lie. She was the one who would always come up with the idea that she was going to love me back, just like she loved Sana. My hope obviously covered my rational thoughts, and the stupid part of my brain showed up.
-'I've already told you this but, I'm really happy that you told me :)'
She is lying, even that little emoji at the end couldn't hide it. I know she is feigning happiness. She was everything but happy. I know that if she could, she would have change class, and even country. I must disgust her so much, it's okay, I disgust myself too.
I let her message on seen as I put my phone back to my pocket. The bus was coming in 4 minutes, which left me enough time to cry without people judging me from afar.
But I didn't let my tears fall down again. It was my fault. I shouldn't have imagined such things with her. Romantic dates, movies... God I was so stupid. I knew how it was going to happen.
I look up at the sky, a cold breeze raised some of my hair. When I think about it, it was at this moment that the lights in the dark blue sky turned off, as if the starts had stopped shining.
Yeah, I knew all of this,
But why does it still hurt?
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
It's quite small, but I really waited to publish something.
Hope you like it :)
(You can cry, I'll cry with you)
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sysig · 8 days
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Last man standing (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#ZEX#It's lonely at the top :(#Poor dearest is worse for wear ah </3#This scene made me cry ;;#Like it was sad when he wrote down his missing canonmates but going back in and writing everyone else's names ;;;;#Even his shaky alliances! Even the people he hasn't seen for a while!! Wehhh <3 <3 <3#You soft heart ;; I see you Admiral ♥#Also had a lot of fun writing in VUK ZIX again hehe ♪#The translations from VUK ZIX to English aren't exact - for starters they're upside down haha#So if you started from the top down it would actually read KINLEZ NATPAK but I figured that wouldn't be as readable#You read from the bottom up! I also still headcanon it being written/read from left to right#So he started with Zelnick then Fwiffo then Tanaka and so on#Although I did change it up for the second one - Teisel then Xelloss then Xigbar then Asch and Van#The more I think of it the more I'm surprised there's no H :0#Even just as a demarcation of a pause before during or after a syllable#The ''sh'' sound makes complete sense tho hehe <3#Any incorrect shaping of letters/poor handwriting on my part can totally be chalked up to ZEX not being used to human hands!#Totallyyy lol#I really like the way specific syllables are shaped - like how Teisel and Zelnick almost share the same shaped between ''SEL'' and ''ZEL''#How Z is a more connected extension of S just agh it's so pretty <3 <3 Eco_Mono really did such a lovely job with it ♪#And then certain ''incorrectly'' spelled syllables still turned out so pretty! Like the ''ANA'' in Talana - look how swoopy and continuous!#The ''BAR'' in Xigbar looks really cool - honestly reminds me of the fanweapons I made ages ago for I? think? Xigbar's apprentice??#It's been too long I don't remember now lol but it's cool to me in particular because of that!! :D#Fwiffo looks so funny haha - Tanaka has a cool star-like kind of letter in his name?? Man it's just so neat <3#As for ZEX - I mean he made it this far :( Not one to give up easily that's for certain ♥ Tenacious#I want him to be happy :'0
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l0stw00d · 9 months
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i draw human(ish) girls sometimes. as a treat. Her name is Anemone!
These were done in clip studio based off of a picrew I did, but took like 5 hours!
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todayisafridaynight · 11 months
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confession: sometimes I come to look at your art as references because you have noted details like moles + looking at what colors u put down in my quest to find what something looks like under neutral lighting I know the shit here has been thoroughly researched
i will be normal upon learning this news.
#fave#snap chats#JUST KIDDINGLAKJVKLE I CANT EVEN MAKE A FUNNYMAN™️ COMMENT THAT'S SUCH AN HONOR THANK YOU SO MUCH#especially when i'm such a fan of your own work... i love your lighting and shading and how Shaped everyone is so much...#just the FEEL yk i cant explain it but your art just feels super great to look at..#the funniest thing bout being sent this today is ironically i was gonna make more 'model sheets' for myself like how i did with y2 daigo#dunno why i just felt compelled to do so.. just so i could draw bitches without having to think ACTUAL Rotating Like An SSBB Trophy moment#except this one i'd make more note heavy..... cause idk i always wanted to do that tbh..#if my arm didnt hurt i probably would ☠️ maybe tomorrow or if im too stubborn later tonight i will ☠️☠️#but wow... again thank you that means a lot. new favorite compliment achieved thank you...#i do spend hours looking at these bitches so im glad. im glad thats apparent i pay attention 😫#in truth i dont even draw EVERY mole on every character- daigo is esp awkward because his moles change throughout games#the moles i draw are specifically for the ps3 era/y3-75#he has different moles in the dragon engine- they're actually on the right side of his face opposed to the left: theyre entirely different#AND IM GOBSMACKED BOUT THE COLORS BIT people tell me my colors are nice but its still ?? for me to acknowledge that sometimes#like not BAD OF COURSE NO NO IM REALLY HAPPY im just.. hm... i didnt think i was doing anything nice..#in any case again. thank you. ive made it clear this is a big compliment I Will Can It now ☠️
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genderfluid-druid · 1 year
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dropping thoughts like laundry into the aromanticism washing machine and watching them spin. taking little notes in a fancy journal titled "greyro??" and crossing them out, but then going back and scribbling an addendum. holding up an extravagant glass beaker full of a cool bubbling potion and peering at it through safety glasses that say "mind the amatonormativity!"
#i think there are two layers of questioning to deal with#the first layer is easier to see and that's the trauma-related layer#the second layer has been going stealth for years and is more intrinsic#the second layer *could* have been a contributing factor toward the first#so anyway the question is. as i work through the trauma and have the support of a therapist to deal with the first layer#does the second layer become an issue. or is there only the first and it's just worked itself deep enough that it now feels intrinsic#the thing is i do get crushes and i do yearn and i can't remember a time when i didn't crave the idea of a relationship#so that should be that right? not aro. at least not intrinsically.#but why did i always end up losing interest in the relationship once i had it#was it really just because i wasn't dating people i actively chose#honestly maybe. there *was* B. i don't know how much longer that might've continued if logistics hadn't put an end to it#and M....... M is a tricky one. because even though i left that relationship by my own choice. i kind of had to in order to not want to die#the thruple vibes with K were just so utterly rancid and M was just so incapable of doing anything to make it better#so yeah. maybe that one could've continued indefinitely IF two to three of the people involved had been#a leeeeetle more mature and well adjusted. maybe. but desire for a relationship was not the issue.#so okay. maybe im NOT aro. maybe i just have shitty taste in men. you know? that's a distinct possibility.#okay. so now on the other hand. let's look at how happy and enlightened I've felt since starting to *use* the aro label#cuz it actually is fantastic. the freedom to just feel love and affection for anyone I'm close to and not have to worry about#it being taken in a way i don't intend. that's great i love that#and not feeling any pressure to find The One? rocks. good shit. i can just let whatever relationships be what they're gonna be#and not have to fret over assigning a label and structures and expectations. hot shit.#(honestly it's helping me understand where M was coming from in a way that would've been. you know. pretty useful six years ago.)#i don't wanna lock myself in a relationship with friend E but it's great hanging out with her on a regular basis#cuz that's the amount of affection i feel for her. enough to chill and watch Owl House. not enough to be in each others' space all the time#(god idk if I'll ever want to be around anyone all the time ever again. that is a LOT for my limited batteries)#idk how physical affection fits into this yet. that area is still under development#but like. if my friends were cool with it and i knew they wouldn't take it too seriously then YES i would probably kiss almost any of them#and i THINK that's true and not me telling myself something i think I'm supposed to believe? i THINK.#'s always the possibility that i just very badly want to be kissed and my brain is looking to make that happen in a way that isn't scary#ah shit that’s 30 tags. i’ve done it again.
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writingouthere · 3 months
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singledad!Sukuna x neighbor!reader-Sukuna and Yuuji really want you to join their family! role reversal from my other series, think this will just be a one-shot though. Yuuji is Sukuna's brother but he's raised him since he was a baby and Yuuji calls him dad.
cw: Sukuna is manipulative and also a murderer but everyone's happy and you're both aware so it's okay. this is really just fluff.
"I....want you to be my mommy?"
Sukuna scowled as Yuuji looked more confused than ever.
"No, no that is not what you're saying kid. You're just going to tell her about how the other kids' mommies on the playground make you feel left out."
"But they don't, Megumi's mommy always gives me a snack when I'm hungry!"
"That's not his mommy, that's Megumi's daddy," Sukuna corrected, wondering if this was just a hopeless endeavor. He could have easily followed a plan this simple when he was four, but Yuuji was too soft. This was what happened when you raised a kid in a stable, loving environment. They lost the ability to go for the jugular when needed.
"But Megumi's daddy calls him mommy?" Sukuna didn't hold back his groan. You were going to be coming back from your morning walk any minute. He didn't have time for Yuuji to not get basic directions or to explain the dynamics of that Gojo family.
"Look when we go out there, just look sad and I'll handle the rest."
"But I'm not sad, I'm happy. We're going to the park and Megumi's mommy is bringing mochi today!"
"Shit kid, do you want a mom or not?" Sukuna asked, trying not to roll his eyes as be bent down to snap on the velcro straps on Yuuji's light up sneakers.
"I don't need a mom, I have you," Yuuji said. He looked uncharacteristically defiant and Sukuna couldn't help feeling proud of his little brother.
It had been touch and go when Yuuji was a baby. Sukuna had still been a kid himself and they didn't have any money and Yuuji's mom was even crazier than Sukuna's. Their father nowhere to be seen. Since Sukuna and Uraume had spread the pieces of his corpse around the city.
Sukuna pushed these memories aside and ruffled Yuuji's hair. "I know you don't need one, we only need each other." Yuuji nodded, his little head moving with all his conviction. "But it might be nice, right?"
Yuuji seemed thoughtful before finally biting his lip and looking down at his sneakers. He tapped them, making the red and black lights flash.
"She's really nice, I like her."
"I like her too," Sukuna said and he heard the sound of your sneakers slapping against the tiled hallway. "So let's go and look sad, okay?" Yuuji nodded, determined now and Sukuna grabbed his backpack before the two brothers went out into the hall.
You were just taking your keys out of your bag and you turned to the brothers, a smile on your face. "Good morning gentlemen, it's nice to see you. Heading out?"
That was when you noticed Yuuji's downturned expression. Sukuna saw your face shift into one of concern and he resisted a smirk.
Sukuna cleared his throat and squeezed Yuuji's hand. Good boy. "We're heading out to the park, you know the one by the high school."
"Oooh, that's nice. You like that park, right Yuuji? You said it was the biggest one in the whole city," you crouched down so you could look Yuuji in the eye and Yuuji seemed to forget he was supposed to be sad for a minute because he jumped up and down, the lights of his shoes flashing in the dim hallway.
"Yeah, it has the best swings too!" You ooohed and aawed appropriately while Sukuna tried not to smack his head against the wall. Maybe he and this kid weren't related after all, fuck.
Yuuji seemed to notice his expression because he stopped jumping to look down at feet. He put out his lower lip and used the tip of one of shoes to mess with a scuff mark on the linoleum. It would have made a more pathetic visage if his shoes weren't still lit up.
"Yuuji," you said, coming closer so you could kneel on the ground in front of the boy. The sight of you on your knees did something to Sukuna, but he pushed it aside to see what the brat had in mind. So far, he wasn't impressed with the performance. "Is something wrong?"
"It's just," Yuuji let out a sad sigh that wouldn't get him a gig in a car commercial. "Megumi and his mommy will be there and it makes me feel sad because all the other kids have mommies and I don't." God, there was no way you could be buying this, Sukuna looked at you and saw that your eyes looked a little watery.
Huh, look at that. Maybe he wouldn't have to kick the kid out, after all.
"I'm sorry Yuuji, that must be hard," you said and you reached out and swiped out where Yuuji had even managed to shed a tear. Sukuna felt so proud. "But I know that your dad is really excited to take you and the two of you are going to have so much fun!"
"Could you come too?" Yuuji asked and you bit your lip. Yuuji looked up and batted his little doe eyes at you. "It would make me really happy if you came with us. We could all have fun together."
"I wouldn't want to intrude-"
"It wouldn't be intruding," Sukuna cut in. "If you're busy though no worries, I know we'll have fun just the two of us. Right, Yuuji?"
Yuuji bit his lip and Sukuna could tell he was torn between showing how excited he was to spend time with his dad and being 'sad' so you would join them.
You looked between the two before seeming to come to some kind of decision. "If you don't mind waiting while I change, I'd be happy to join you two. Should I bring anything?"
"I think we're all set. We'll wait outside for you," Sukuna said and Yuuji went up and gave you a big hug that you returned.
Sukuna took Yuuji outside to wait for you, the kid occupying himself with a mostly washed away hopscotch chalk sketch. Sukuna alternated between watching him and texting Uraume who was claiming to be over him and his nonsense. Sukuna would take it more seriously if Uraume hadn't been saying that for going on twenty years. He knew they loved him, fucking sap.
Soon, but not soon enough, you came bounding down the stairs. A scarf tied around your neck, your turtleneck exposed by the open top button of your coat. He couldn't keep letting you be single, looking all pretty like that. He was too greedy for that.
Besides, looking the way you did and knowing your big heart, it was just a matter of time before some nice loser tricked you into settling with them and he just couldn't have that. The idea of you taking someone else home to your warm apartment with it's million throw blankets and a cookie jar, an actual cookie jar, he was convinced you kept stocked up just for Yuuji, made him want to commit another murder.
"Ready?" you asked and Sukuna nodded while Yuuji took your hand in his right and Sukuna's in his left.
"Let's go!"
Yuuji's enthusiasm was contagious and the two of you chatted all the way to the park. Sukuna saw some people shoot you all looks as you walked. Sukuna was used to people viewing him with suspicion, even fear. His tattoos, dyed hair and general demeanor making people cross the street to avoid him. Something about you and Yuuji seemed to balance him out though and people reacted as if they were just looking at a cute family going out on a Saturday.
You didn't seem to notice either way and just continued talking to Yuuji about some new anime for kids Sukuna had probably had to suffer through but hadn't retained any memory of.
As soon as you all got to the park, Yuuji took off with barely a good-bye. You seemed concerned and Sukuna bumped your shoulder with his. "Don't stress, he just sees the Fushiguro kid over there. See, they're already fucking around."
He pointed to where Yuuji was chasing around a scowling dark haired boy the same age as him. Sukuna didn't buy the scowl for a second.
He had once run into the kid and his weird dads at the grocery store and the kid had scolded him when he figured out Yuuji wasn't with him. Sukuna would have knocked the kid down a peg if he wasn't actually four years old and if his 'mommy' didn't low key give him the creeps. Sukuna was pretty sure he wasn't the only person guilty of homicide currently at this playground.
"That's so cute," you cooed and Sukuna nodded along while he took you over to some picnic tables. Unfortunately one of them was already occupied.
"Aww if it isn't Sukuna. How nice it is to see your lovely face on a Saturday morning!"
"Gojo."
Sukuna was ready to leave it there but then the bastard got up and walked over. His partner continued sipping on a large cup of boba, watching from his seat although he gave you a little wave.
"Who is this, new girlfriend?" Gojo asked tilting down his sunglasses to look you up and down.
You laughed and introduced yourself while Megumi's parents did the same. Gojo grabbed your hand when you held it out and kissed the back of it, his lips curved into a smile even as he lingered, his fingers clearly holding onto where your pulse would be. Sukuna moved closer to you and put a hand around your waist, the gesture a clear sign for the other man to back off which Sukuna knew Gojo understood because the bitch fucking smiled at him.
Sukuna didn't necessarily take any of Gojo's flirtations seriously. He flirted with every mom and dad on the playground, including him when they first met. He'd even seen him flirt with the guy who worked the ice cream truck so egregiously the kid had looked on the verge of passing out. His partner never seemed bothered and Sukuna wondered if he was just that secure in the relationship or if he hoped someone would finally come along and get the annoying man away from him.
As usual though, Gojo lost interest quickly and went back to his husband who didn't say anything as Gojo lay across his lap like some kind of housecat.
"There are children here," Sukuna said. Mostly out of spite and not jealousy that the two of you weren't curled up like that.
"Don't be homophobic," Gojo said and you snorted before looking innocent when Sukuna shot you a look.
"Alright, let's go see what Yuuji's up to." Sukuna went along with your excuse, mostly just because he liked the feeling of your hand in his. The two of you wandered closer to the playground where Megumi and Yuuji were currently engaged in a game with some other kids that Sukuna couldn't have possibly guessed the subject of.
The kids alternated running around the large structure, disappearing into tunnels, jumping down to hide underneath slides and behind climbing walls. Every time Yuuji popped back up to view he would wave and call out to you both. Sukuna still felt a little warm whenever the kid called him dad and the look you gave him after made him feel caught.
"So, I can see why Yuuji was so sad those morning. Megumi's parents are just vicious monsters," you said and Sukuna was so taken aback he knew his expression didn't hide it well. You smiled and swung your hand that was still in his, turning so you could look at him.
"I don't think that's what the issue was," Sukuna managed and you nodded.
"Right, it must have been because he's so lonely," you said before the two of you were interrupted by the sound of children's ecstatic laughter. You both looked to where Yuuji was now being chased by an entire horde of children.
"I'm the curse, you have to catch me," he yelled out and the other children screamed and laughed as they tried to grab him. Yuuji had never had a hard time making friends and that was very evident in the way he got kids of all ages, even the quiet ones to join in on his game.
"You can have friends and still be lonely," Sukuna argued and you gave him just the softest look. It wasn't fair for you to see through his schemes and still look at him like that.
"Are you lonely, Sukuna?" You got closer to him, your hand still got in his and you were so warm. "Maybe I should come home with you, then?"
Sukuna couldn't have stopped himself from kissing you even if he wanted to, which he didn't. He let go of your hand so he could cup your face in both of his palms. You moaned your approval into his mouth and he responded by nipping your upper lip, pulling you up to meet him as he leaned down to kiss you. Sukuna was about to risk another arrest by taking you right here in the park before a familiar voice called out to the both of you.
"Hey now, there's children here."
Sukuna turned to give the infuriating dumbfuck a piece of his mind when you distracted him by pulling him back to you and giving him a quick peck on the lips. He could leave the fight with Gojo for another day, he supposed. He knew he'd win anyway.
You're smiling and you look so happy and Sukuna doesn't feel the least amount of guilt in getting you here. Even if you knew it was a trick.
Although.
Did this mean you knew that all those times he was "stuck at work" and needed someone to watch Yuuji were a lie too? Or that he actually could cook and the one time he set the building fire alarm off had been because he started an actual fire and not just him burning dinner and two of them didn't actually need you to invite them to dinner so much? Did you also know that your radiator hadn't just stopped working randomly but he had broke it, knowing you would call him because your super never answered, and when he said a part was still missing and you would just have to stay the night at his and Yuuji's place-
Sukuna looked at you more closely and you just kept smiling.
As Yuuji called for the two of you to come help him and Megumi on the swings, Sukuna wondered if he had ever trapped you, even once. Or if you had just let him catch you.
Watching you push Yuuji as the boy screamed for you to go "higher, higher!" he decided he didn't care. Fuck, it might just be better. Knowing you were maybe as crazy as he was.
shout out to the dad at the park today who had the audacity to play with his toddler and have a cute dog at the same time.
also I liked the end of this so much I may just write a prequel of Sukuna and reader taking turns gaslighting the other into a relationship, we'll see.
Edit: wrote the prequel, here!
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teaboot · 10 days
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This is gonna sound rather conceited but I feel like it highlights an issue we have in Art.
I'm good at art. I've never had a hard time making art. I started using crayons before I could walk. Painting, Beadwork, sculpture, sketching, stippling, whatever- once I have a feel for the material, it doesn't take long to start doing what I want with it. It's been a common theme my whole life.
(Y contrast I'm awful at things like dancing, performance, sports, etc- in all things there is balance, right?)
Now, I've taught myself to use so many artistic mediums now that I KNOW how to most efficiently integrate them into the brain database. Once you really *understand* a material, it's much like memorizing the layout of your house, or flexing a muscle, or something in-between- it becomes PART of your brain in a way I cant quite articulate. But to get there involves just fucking around for a bit doing nothing in particular.
And I've found, especially in group settings, that nobody seems to be able to see you make something badly and leave you alone. Even if you say you're fine, you don't want help, you're happy, you're having fun, it's fine, they gotta ride your ass and hover.
I was at a class the other day for something I hadn't done before. The medium was one I've never used, so once the instructor told us the basics I started experimenting with weight, gravity, texture, viscosity, saturation, temperature, etc. The instructor had given enough info to know what was dangerous and what was safe, and beyond that I just wanted to absorb what I could about it.
And no insult to the instructor, but they kept checking in. Which was fine the first few times.
But then, without asking me what I was trying to do, started giving tips. That I told them I was grateful for but didn't really need just yet. If I had a question, I'd ask.
But they kept coming over. And touching my shit. And manipulating my project. And touching my hands. And using my tools. Without fucking asking.
And this happens every time. EVERY TIME. And by now I know the best way to get them to fuck off is to make something way beyond their expectations so they know I'm capable, then go back to doing what I want.
So I did. I wanted to keep having fun and learning, but instead I made something beautiful that I really didn't want to make, and wasted my time, and really didn't learn what I wanted to learn at all. I knew the formula to create a beautiful thing, so I followed that formula the same way I have a hundred times before, and didn't get to try anything spontaneous or ugly or exciting, just so I could be left alone.
And I know when I was a kid, I was aware aware people saw me puttering alone on something ugly assumed I had a special issue and treated me like I was stupid because of that. (I was neurodivergent.) And at at time I knew that I could do a neat trick for them like a trained pony and they'd go, "Oh, surely they aren't defective if they can do something like that!" And piss off.
But what if I hadn't known how to do that?
What if I hadn't been talented, or "special"?
What if I'd been just any other average kid trying to learn, and I couldn't pop something pretty out of my ass to get them off my back?
My problem my whole life has been that I haven't been allowed to make anything ugly in peace. I'm capable of beauty, so I have to make beauty, or get stepped on. And once people see what I can do, they get loud about it. "Look at this! Look what they did! We all know who the best is, don't we?". And that used to feel good, but it's tiring.
And how many people like me just wanted to play? Just wanted to have fun and experiment? Who were having fun with no goal in mind, or just took longer to learn, who gave up because of all the obnoxious helpers breathing down their neck with no way to shake them off?
How many of us are made to feel defective because we aren't doing things beautifully?
I have a lovely piece of art I didn't want to make.
I think I'm gonna frame it.*
(*I think I'm gonna burn it in my yard.)
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