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latteandjacks · 9 days

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I'm back at making these

Taduction for the last two:

"Love how you plan everything" "It's called having anxiety"

2. "How is your monday going, unknown person who administrates the Candy Club account?" "I think I have depression xd (XD)" "Hi, Vicky here! CEO of social media administration of the Candy Club. I'm sorry for the last message. it was an accident and it won't happen again. We're having a great monday and I hope you too!"

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verydeadaten · 1 month

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Schedules

Based on this post.

Pyrrha: *with Yang* J-Jaune.

Jaune: *looking up from notebook* Pyr?

Pyrrha: *sweating* W-W-Would you be i-interested, I mean, um, me a-and Yang, um, w-we want...we want-WE-

Yang: Hey. *holds Pyrrha's hand* Don't worry P-Money, I got this. *kisses her cheek*

Yang: Loverboy! You know how me and Pyrrha have been dating for a few weeks, right?

Jaune: Yes, and I'm very happy it's been going well for the both of you!

Yang: Thank you. And you, Pyrrha, and me have been hanging with each other more than often, so we're good friends, right?

Jaune: I mean, you do invite me to third-wheel on your dates. I think we're a bit more than "good" friends, no?

Pyrrha: *red*

Yang: You cute little flirt, you.

Jaune: What?

Yang: Me and Pyrrha where thinking. Coul-

Pyrrha: COULD YOU DATE US?!?!

Jaune: HUH?

Yang: Whoa! Way to put it all out, babe! I'm proud of you.

Jaune: *blushing* C-Could you repeat that.

Pyrrha: Yang and me both decided we wanted you to join our, uh, relationship. We both lo...l-lov...we both really like you. You're smart and kind and handsome and determined andireallywanttokissyouonthemouthand-

Yang: Yeah, what she said. You're a real catch, Loverboy. And we want to reel you in. So...what do you say?

Jaune: Wow...really? I...I would love to be a part of you relationship.

Yang: YES!

Pyrrha: *nearly faints out of sheer happiness*

Jaune: But I can't.

Yang: What.

Pyrrha: *glass break sfx*

Pyrrha: Wha-Why not?!

Jaune: I'm too busy!

Yang: ...what.

Jaune: I can't date the two of you. I don't have the time.

Yang: Is this some kind of joke, Vomit-Boy? Because if it is, you need to get better material.

Jaune: It's not a joke! See? *pulls out piece of paper*

Pyrrha: What is this?

Jaune: My schedule.

Yang: Combat class...leadership class...cook for team? Frag time? The hell is that?

Pyrrha: Oh, that must be when he plays that shooty game he plays. Team...something 2?

Yang: What the? Training with Pyrrha? BABE! You've had alone time with him and you didn't invite me?

Pyrrha: I'm sorry!

Jaune: See? I'm really sorry girls. I'd love to date you, but my schedule's packed.

Yang: *seething with rage*

Pyrrha: no...NO! I WON'T ACCEPT THIS! JAUNE ARC! YOU WILL MAKE TIME FOR US BOTH!

Yang: Yeah!

Pyrrha: YOU WILL GO ON DATES WITH US!

Yang: YEAH!

Pyrrha: YOU WILL GIVE US GIFTS!

Yang: YEAH!

Pyrrha: AND YOU WILL MAKE LOVE TO US GENTLY ON A HOT SUMMER'S NIGHT!!!

Yang: YEA-wait what?

Jaune: But...but...I don't have the time!

Yang: Jaune, just do your work later in the day.

Jaune: But my sleep.

Pyrrha: Beloved, you wake up at the crack of dawn. You'll be fine.

Yang: And if it really is such an issue, just do your work with us. We mostly have the same homework, anyways.

Jaune: I...I never even thought of that.

Pyrrha: *sighs* You're such a silly, silly man.

Yang: Hey, he's our silly, silly man.

Jaune: Yeah! I mean, we are a thing now, right?

Yang: Damn straight! Now, get on your bed.

Jaune: Huh?

Yang: You see, Loverboy, you got me and P-Money over here really stressed out with your, "schedule shenanigans," and we need to cool off.

Pyrrha: *nodding head*

Yang: When we're stressed, we usually cuddle each other. But why do that when we have this big, blonde, hunky teddy bear in front of us? You feel me?

Jaune: *blushing* Y-Yeah. I, uh, I feel you.

Yang: Oh you'll be feeling us alright.

Jaune: *very red*

#rwby #jaune arc #pyrrha nikos #yang xiao long #greek fire #arkos #dragonslayer #armored dragon

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juanarc-thethird · 6 months

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Mutual Feelings.

Jaune is in his room playing video games with May. They are sitting on Jaune's bed facing the TV.

Jaune: Almost! Almost! I got you!! Woo-ho!! Another victory for me~

May: *Sad* Oh… I lost again.

Jaune: Don't be sad. You're playing a lot better now. And one day maybe you'll beat me, but I'm really good so… *He said it with a smug smile*

May: *Smiling she pushes Jaune a little with her shoulder* Shut up, ugly. You suck

Jaune: *Chuckles*

*Knock! Knock!*

Nora: *Walks in the room* Hey guys...

Jaune: Oh hey Nora. I though you went to the movies with Ren.

Nora: We are, is just that I forgot my wallet here. Don't worry, I'm not going to ruin your date. *She smiles, teasing him*

The two individuals in question blush at the comment.

Jaune: *Red* Is not a date!

Nora: Sureee... *takes her wallet* and I am not in love with Ren.

Jaune grabs one of her pillows if he throws it at her.

Jaune: Leave!

Nora quickly leaves the room, laughing in the process.

Jaune: Jeez, that Nora. Sorry about that May.

May: *Blushing* I-It's ok.

Jaune: I'm going to get something to eat at the vending machines. Want something? *He says as he starts to get up*

May: I'll go with you! *She says as she stands up as well*

Without noticing, May lost her balance and tried to hold on to Jaune. He realizes this and tries to catch her. But they both fall to the ground, May on top of Jaune.

Jaune: Ouch... May, are you ok?

May: Y-Yes, I'm fine.

May raises her head to see Jaune, and he is stunned after see in her face so close. For him it was as if for the first time he saw how beautiful May is. Her beautiful gray eyes, her delicate tanned skin, her gorgeous red hair. Jaune already had feelings for her, but he never made a move out of fear of losing her friendship. But seeing her in this position, he knew that he had to act and make her his girlfriend, and one day her future wife.

Jaune: *Nervous* M-May!

May: *Jumps a little in surprise* Y-Yes!

Jaune: I like you a lot! Please go out with me!

May: *Blushing* Eh?!

Jaune: I have always liked you but I was afraid to say it thinking that maybe I would lose your friendship. But I can't contain myself anymore! I really like you a lot, and hope we can even get marry one day!

May *RED* EH?!!!

Jaune: W-what you think about that?

May: I... I.... I like you too!! *She says at the top of her lungs* I always liked you, but I was afraid you were going to reject me. I'm so happy!

She suddenly reaches for Jaune's head and kisses him passionately. Jaune can feel her moving her hands over his body as they kiss. He feels how her hand walks along his chest, his stomach, and then ends up on his…

Jaune: *Stops Kissing* May, that's my-!

May: I'm sorry, but I've waited so long for this that I can't contain myself. I really love you a lot. I want to feel close to you as much as possible. Please…

She looks at him with a pleading face. She looked so tender that Jaune couldn't deny her. He thought that having sisters would help you with these things, but when the girl you like begs you so sweetly, how can he refuse?

Jaune: O-Ok, I want this too.

May: *Smiling* I love you~ *Kiss*

Moments later....

May: Jaune~💕 Ah!~💕 I love you su much~💕

Jaune: I love you too~ Fuck!~💕

Jaune was sitting on his bed, while May was in the back of him, enjoying how his member penetrated deep inside her again and again.

May: I can't think straight if you keep thrusting like that!~💕

Jaune: I can help it. You feel to good~ *starts kissing her neck*

May: You too!~💕 FUck~💕! You're the only one for me. I want to be with you forever.

Jaune: God damn it. I think am about to cum.

May: Please do. Please cum inside me~💕

Jaune hugs May tightly with both arms and begins to fuck her with more intensity.

May: Yes!~💕 Keep fucking me like that!~💕

Jaune: Oh shit!~💕 I'm getting close!

May: I'm close too, don't stop!~💕

Jaune: Oh fuck! Oh fuck!! Oh FucK!!

May: Give it to me!!

Jaune: OH FUCk!!

Jaune pushes May down with all his strength. His cock shot all of his cum deep inside her, filling her whole.

May: Oh GOD!!~💕 Is so much! I love you so much!

Jaune: *Huff* *Huff* I love you too.

May: *Hugs him tight* Fuck, lets stay like this for a momento ok?

Jaune: Of course.

May: *Kiss him* I so happy to be with you.

Jaune: *Kiss her back* Me too.

#jaune arc #rwby jaune #jaune #rwby jaune arc #may zedong #rwby may zedong #rwby may #may #rwby #handholding stuff #rwby smut #rwby lemon #nora #rwby nora #rwby nora valkyrie #nora valkyrie

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howlingday · 1 month

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Ironwood: You! Make more rifles!

Ironwood: You! Make more cannons!

Ironwood: You! Make more horses!

Jaune: I don't make horses!

Ironwood: Then who makes horses?!

Jaune: Horses make horses!

Ironwood: Explain how!

Jaune: W-Well, when a daddy horse and a mommy horse love each other very much...

Ironwood: Yes?! Go on!

Jaune: Th-Then daddy horse... Well, he-

---------------------------------------------

Ironwood: (Against the wall)

Jaune: I-I'm sorry, sir. You're 45 years old. (Touches shoulder) I thought you'd know this stuff-

Ironwood: (Shoves him) DON'T TOUCH ME! I'm gonna be sick...

#rwby #jaune arc #james ironwood #oversimplified

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rwby-encrusted-blog · 3 months

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Penny: HUNTSMAN! You are under arrest for vigilan-

Jaune (The Huntsman): ... Hail ... Fair Maiden? Of Whom I've never met?

Penny: ...

Jaune: Are you well? You stopped speaking suddenly.

Roman: Hey, Tinker Toy! We're kind of in the middle of something!

Jaune: Do not refer to her as that! Metal she may be, But she is more than a mere plaything!

Penny: A-Apologies! I was shocked by your face!

Jaune: Oh ...

Roman: Hah!

Penny: In a positive Fashion! You appear very similar to a friend, and are very handsome!

Jaune: Oh! You are very Beautiful yourself P- Erm, INterloper! But with your assistance The thief Roman Torchwick shall finally meet Justice!

//WARNING! CORE TEMPERATURE RISING//

Penny: Beautiful? Beautiful!?!? *Ahem* You are both under arrest! Please lay your weapons down and come peacefully!

Roman: *Climbing out a window* Sorry Love-Machine! But I got an Airship to catch!

Penny: *Blushing* I do not understand to what you are referring! Halt at Once!

Jaune: *Blushing, beginning to run after him* Yes! Cease your escape!

Penny: You are under arrest as well!

Jaune: He is a Violent thief, and I have stopped his assaults on several occasions! We should work together! *He Holds out his hand* Pray, let us join forces to end his reign of terror!

Penny: ... *Blushes harder, takes his hand* Very well! Let us arrest Roman Torchwick!

~One Epic Chase and Fight scene later~

Roman: *Tied up* I am getting really tired of the teenagers and their dumb superpowers!

Penny: As I have stated, you have the right to remain silent!

Roman: And as I've stated before, I choose to waive that Right! LAAAAAAAA-

Jaune: *Punches Roman*

Roman: Hrk-

Penny: Thank you for making him Quiet. I would have but that would be very disgraceful.

Jaune: Not a problem. He was always a little mouthy beyond the banter.

Penny: And thank you for your assistance in his arrest. You managed to move Civilians out of the way and keep property damage to a minimum. *She takes out restraints* Unfortunately, you are still under arrest. If you come peacefully, and do well in your hearing, I'm certain the Atlas Military would be willing to bring you in, and truly hone them to perfection.

Jaune: *he steps forward* Thank you, but I cannot let that happen. I focus on the common folk, the Downtrodden and Forgotten. If I were to join the military, I would have to abandon them.

Jaune: *Stepping Closer* But I see the brightness sin your soul, the kindness in your words, and the care in your actions.

Jaune: *Face to face with Penny* We are birds of a feather - We have the same hopes and desires, but we are worlds apart. You do your job well, and I do mine. *He cups Penny's chin* And while I can't leave with you, perhaps I can leave you with this. *Jaune closes his eyes*

Penny: ... *Closes her eyes and tilts her head*

*Click*

Penny: *Opens Eyes, sees The Huntsman Sprinting away*

Penny: *Looks at wrist, is restrained*

Roman: HAHAHAH! HAHAHA- HAHAHA! OH MY GODS! THAT WAS HILARIOUS!

Roman: Gods, I remember the first time some shit like that happened to me. I was so pissed-

Penny: *Tears arm from restraint, knocks Roman out* You have the RIGHT to remain SILENT.

#rwby #jaune arc #penny polendina #rwby shitpost #the huntsman #arculus rift #roman torchwick

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howi99 · 2 months

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Jaune: *finishing his latest puppet* ... What should i name you?

Penny: What about Charlotte? Or Emily? Or Anne?

Jaune: Maybe? I also find Victoria to be a great name.

Alyx: *bored out of her mind* Why is it that important? It's not like it was your child or anything.

Penny: ...

Jaune: W-well no, but you know, one can wish upon a star.

Alyx: *laughing* Like that would work.

Lewis: Alyx! For the love of god shut up.

Alyx: *surprised* What? It's a doll Lewis! If they want children, there's other methods than "wishing upon a star"!

Jaune: ... We...

Penny: We can't have children.

Alyx: *stopping mocking them* ... What?

Jaune: We don't know why but Penny can't get pregnant. We... Tried, multiple times but...

Penny: *sad smile* It never worked out... But then Jaune decided that he would make children for us.

Alyx: ... I'm... Sorry. I didn't know...

Penny: We don't blame you Alyx, but you know now. That's what's important.

Alyx:... Then what about Marie? I think it would fit her.

Jaune: *smiling* And i think you are right. Thank you Alyx.

#jaune arc #penny polendina #arculus rift #rwby #rwby au #jaune is a genius au #rwby alyx #rwby lewis

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dragonking10 · 4 months

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What if Jaune had PTSD from his time at the Ever After?

It was a beautiful morning, the sun was barely rising leaving a beautiful stunning view of the hills of trees and one two-story house the middle of woods with fences around the yard and a beautiful rose garden in the front and a barn in the backyard with two horses in the field running around in a fenced area next to the house when suddenly

Jaune wakes up: I'M LATE!!!

Jaune rushes out of bed waking up his wife Ruby in the process

Ruby rubbing her eyes: Late for what?

She sees her husband rushing to get his armor on then it realization suddenly hit her.

Ruby: Jaune WAIT!

Jaune with his armor half-way on: I CAN'T RUBY, THERE'S NO TIME I HAVE TO SAVE THEM!

Ruby: Jaune look at me *grabs his face and gently make him face her* Look at me.

Ruby can see her husband's eyes dialated as if he's stuck in a memory.

Ruby: Listen to my voice and take a deep breath.

Jaune takes a deep breath.

Ruby: That's it, you're doing good, come back to me.

Jaune's eyes suddenly turned back to normal as he slowly looks around then back to his wife.

Jaune sighs: I did it again didn't I?

Ruby nods

Jaune hugs Ruby: I'm sorry-

Ruby: Don't be, I'm always here for you. Let's get back in bed you're exhausted.

Ruby slowly guides him back to their bed and gently pulls Jaune down, resting his head on her lap.

Jaune: I don't deserve you.

Ruby: Yes you do, you derserve me alot than you think.

Ruby gently rubs Jaune's hair out of face and continues to pet him, soothing his worries.

Jaune: I... love...zzz.

Jaune falls asleep

Ruby smiles and kisses his forehead: I love you too Jaune.

#rwby lancaster #lancaster #jaune x ruby #ruby x jaune #jaune arc x ruby rose #ruby rose x jaune arc #jaune arc #ruby rose #rwby #lancaster4life #ruby is the only one that calms jaune's ptsd

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lwde-encrusted-sideblog · 5 months

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Jaune: Well. It has certainly been a month hasn't it. You certainly haven't made it easy Penny.

Penny: ...

Jaune: Penny?

Penny: You know what? It has been fun teasing you. Seeing you flustered is entertaining to some degree, especially when it's over my body.

Jaune: Well that's nice-

Penny: But when it is officially December I am going to Break the Bed beneath our hips. I am going to Give you so much pleasure you'll regret ever doing this challenge.

Jaune: Penny?

Penny: You are going to be addicted to my body.

Jaune: Are you alright? What's gotten into you?

Penny: NOT YOU, OBVIOUSLY!

Jaune: *Fear*

Penny: *Deep breath* Apologies. I am somewhat frustrated I have failed to seduce you entirely. It has made me a little ... insecure. Like I am not attractive enough for you to desire sex with me.

Jaune: *Hugs her* Oh, Penny, I'm so sorry. I didn't know. You're absolutely stunning, and more than that, you're kind and sweet. If doing this stupid challenge makes you feel bad because of me, I'd have stopped before I began.

Penny: I- It just has felt like we hardly even Cuddled or held each other this month.

Jaune: Sorry. It's just that every time I did try to be close to you, you would do something to seduce me, and I really didn't want to fail. But I've been wanting to hold you to. I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about it.

Penny: I have also not been honest. I should've have told you how I was feeling, or stopped trying to make you fail. I'm sorry as well.

Jaune: ...

Penny: Would you like to go for a walk today? No tricks, No attempts at seduction, just going out for a bit. Perhaps we could go get seasonal drinks at a Drink Stand to fight the cold of the season?

Jaune: Yeah. That sounds lovely, but ...

Penny: ?

Jaune: Only if you promise to do what you said earlier.

Penny: Oh, Of course. I said what I said, I said what I meant, When this month is over, to Nirvana You'll be sent.

#rwby #jaune arc #rwby shitpost #penny polendina #arculus rift #jaune's no nuts november

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infoglitch · 5 months

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The first hook-up can change EVERYTHING: Lancaster.

Before the hookup.

To say ruby was uncharacteristically giddy, would be a MAJOR understatement. This was it, after bugging jaune about it for days months their finally gonna do it. Ruby could practically sense jaune standing in front of the door as he soon opened it

Jaune: I'm here ruby... You sure about this? T-this is both our firsts you know.

Ruby nodded profusely as jaune sighed.

Jaune: I dont know what's gotten into you but I guess if we both consent we can do it.

Ruby: ALRIGHTY! Now come here vomit boy, I'm gonna make this a night you won't forget!

Jaune: oh I won't forget it, but I'll definitely regret it.

After the hookup

Jaune: ruby ... I wanna start by saying I am VERY sorry about what just transpired.

Ruby: jaune.. why are you apologizing?

Jaune:w-well I probably didn't s-satisfy and I was probably way too-

Suddenly ruby grabbed his face as jaune gulped softly.

Ruby: jaune. Listen to me. To put it lightly, you ROCKED my world. You know that?

Jaune nodded slowly as Ruby smiled brightly.

Ruby: good! Now remember what I'm gonna say ok?

Jaune nodded as she pulled him and kissed him softly.

Ruby: I love you and even if you didn't satisfy me, I don't care because you matter more than something like sex.

Jaune blushes deeply as he smiled

Jaune: t-thanks ruby. I love you too.

Ruby: great! Now. We're doing it again, right after we get something to eat.

Jaune: ok then.

Jaune: well Atleast it's not immediately after this.. I don't think my hips could handle another round that fast.

#rwby #rwby lancaster #jaune arc #jaune x ruby #ruby rose x jaune arc #ruby rose #lancaster #lancaster rwby

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dantedsblog · 2 months

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Blake: Hi, Jaune.

Jaune: Hey, Blake. What's up?

Blake: I have something to tell you. It's about what happened last night*blushes* d-do you remember what happened last night.

*Flashbacks at club *

Blake:Jaune I have to tell something.

Jaune: W-what is wrong ? *absolutedrunk*

Blake: We know each other for a long time and we’ve passed through a lot…

Jaune: Y-yes

Blake: Jaune I think I love y-

Jaune: *falls down unconscious*

Blake: I hate my life…

*end of flashbacks*

Jaune: Last night? I don't remember anything.

Blake: *are you kidding me ?!* Y-you were unconscious. I had to carry you to the infirmary.

Jaune: Oh, that's right. I remember now. I was feeling sick and dizzy.

Blake: Yes, you were. You were so weak that I couldn't lift you up.

Jaune: I'm sorry, Blake. I didn't mean to make you worry.

Blake: It's okay, Jaune. I was just concerned about you.*he cares that I was worried about him damn he is too cute*

Jaune: Thank you for taking care of me.

Blake: No problem.

They both smiled at each other.

Blake:Someday…

#knightshade #rwby #blake belladonna #jaune arc #ai generated art

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riku-izanami · 7 months

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Costume Chaos

Inside the Team Jnpr Dorm, Blake, Yang, Coco, Velvet, & members of NPR sat around the room waiting for a certain someone to appear in his future Halloween costume.

Jaune: Are you guys ready?

Ren: whenever you are

Nora: Show us what you got jaune-jaune!

Pyrrha: You got this jaune

Yang: *whispering to Coco* wanna beat it's something cheesy

Coco: Your On

Blake & Velvet: Why do I smell blackberry perfume

The bathroom door opened, revealing Jaune Arc, wearing a black cloak with a flared collar. However, what everyone else is paying attention to is the makeup on his face.

Blake: is he wearing...

She didn't get to finish as he threw off his cloak, Revealing what, more so who his costume was

Jaune: SO.....thoughts

Ren:......

Blake: *nose bleed*

Velvet: 0_0

Yang: *laughing* No...Fucking....Way!

Coco: DAMN IT. WHY DID I THINK OF FRANK N FURTER. THIS IS GENIUS!

Pyrrha: *pyrrha.exe stopped working*

Nora: *wolf whistle* LOOKIN GOOD FEAR-LESS LEADER!

Jaune: *blushing* AWW......Shucks

Yang: *in between breaths* So......what....made.....you....think....of this

Jaune: Well.......I what would be the most unique and non overused costume and *gestures to his outfit* this came to mind

Pyrrha:*Pyrrha.exe reactivated* I thought we were doing a group theme

Jaune: We are! Ren is going as Riff Raff, Nora Columbus, and you can be Magenta

Ren: sounds good.

Nora: I'm the fun one!

Pyrrha: Oh she sounds lovely

The other teams looked at him like he was joking

Jaune: What?

Yang: you just said Pyrrha Nikos, the invincible girl, be a maid.....

Jaune: yeah so.?

Velvet: Jaune....She has to be Rocky....

Pyrrha: Who? I'm sorry but I don't know any of these characters

Blake: I'll show you the movie later, but for now, Rocky is Jaune's boy toy

Pyrrha:...0////0 oh

Jaune: Yeah, I thought that too. I mean *in an on-point Frankfurter accent* she is the perfect female specimen.

Pyrrha: *blushing and smiling*

Jaune:....But I don't think she'd be comfortable wearing just a gold bikini.

Pyrrha: but...

Coco, Yang, Blake, & velvet: true/there's a lot of horn dogs here/plus someone may post her on Dustnet

Pyrrha: but....

Jaune: So I got Sun to play him instead

And right on cue, Sun appeared wearing a gold Speedo.

Sun: And I look fantastic

Blake: *full on Geyser nosebleed*

Yang: *whistles* wow, you really put much effort into this.

Jaune: thank you *beaming pridefully* now *back in the accent* Come Rocky~ *he jumps into Sun's arms* we must make you the man you're meant to be

Sun: *carrying him bridal style* dude, if I wasn't bi-curious before..I am now

the two proceed out the door, followed by Pyrrha

Pyrrha: Hey, I wanna be Rocky. Can I be Rocky instead? Please!

Back in the dorm.

Yang:...Is it weird I kinda wanna fuck vb now after that?

Coco: Not really

Blake: I wonder if he wants a Janet too?

Ren: Do you think the staff will allow us to pull this off?

Velvet: probably not?

______________________________________________________________

MEANWHILE, in Ozpin's office

Goodwitch: Excuse me, sir, I've got the test result you asked for

Ozpin: *spinning around in a FrankFurter costume* thank you Glynda, and please, call me Ozzie~

Goodwitch:..........why......

#jaune arc #rwby #lie ren #blake belladonna #nora valkyrie #pyrrha nikos #yang xiao long #coco adel #velvet scarlatina #glynda goodwitch #rwby ozpin #the rocky horror picture show #costume chaos

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reashot · 7 months

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Jaune Phone Call with Papa Arc.

Team JNPR Dorm Room.

Jaune: I'm gonna fail this assignment because my dad won't open up.

Ren: Me and Nora going to fail because our parents were killed because of a Grimm attack.

Pyrrha: Wow I didn't knew that Ren. I'm sorry to hear that. And are you doing Nora's homework?

Nora: Fo'sho. What? You expect me to do my own homework? Please think even less of me.

Ren: Look Jaune, back on topic. A lot of people feel more comfortable talking about personal things when it's not face-to-face.

Nora: Maybe you should try calling your dad.

Jaune: I guess it's worth a shot...

*ring* 🎶

Mistralian Restaurant.

Papa Arc: Hello?

Jaune: H-hey dad. What'chu up to?

Papa Arc: Eating lunch. I just needed a break from work you know. Lately I've been thinking about all the people I've had to kill...

God. The first, five, ten times you take a life it's eerie you remember every detail. I can see all their faces. One had a beard. Each time I pulled the trigger I tied a little knot in my memory no amount of whiskey could loosen...

Nora: *Scoots away from the phone call*

Papa Arc: Of course eventually I stopped caring. Now I can put a bullet through a man's head while figuring out how much VFC to pick up on my way home. It's usually no more than a bucket.

Pyrrha: 😱

Papa Arc: The sick part is I've come to love it. Snuffing out lives. I crave it. I feel like an angel of death, the messenger of eternal darkness, a merciless demon with an unquenchable... Oh! They just put more orange chicken on the Buffett gotta run. *phone ended.

Nora: *Hiding under the bed*

JPR: *Stunned in place*

Back in the Dorm Room

Jaune: I can't turn this in. It's all about my dad killing people.

*someone enters into the room*

Yang: What is this about killing people?

Pyrrha: Hey Yang, it's nothing we're trying to finish our assignment.

Weiss: I already finished mine ages ago. What took you guys so long?

Ren: We're trying to get Jaune's dad to talk about what happened during his time, but so far he's being "uncooperative"...

Blake: How is he being "uncooperative?"

Nora: *shivering* You don't want to know....

Ruby: Oh, maybe I can help you with your dad? 🙂

Jaune: *rub Ruby's head* It's okay Ruby. It's my assignment after all. You don't have to do anything to help me.

Ruby: *purr* 😸 (Oh yeah, that's the stuff... Run my head like you own me. 😚)

Ren: Call your dad again and get him to talk about something else.

*ring* 🎶

Papa Arc: Hello?

Jaune: Hey dad.

Papa Arc: Son, glad you called. I was kind of bumming thinking about your mom.

Jaune: W-what, why?

Yang: (Isn't she the hot one?)

Papa Arc: *sigh* I feel like our lovemaking has lost all its intimacy. We're not attuned to each other's love energy, we're just slamming away...

Jaune: Dad! I'm here with the girls on speakerphone.

Blake: (Don't interrupt him! 😾)

Papa Arc: Hey girls! So, Lovemaking sure can turn into sex without you even noticing it. And why not sex with your mom feels great!

*Team RWBY starts circling in to listen closely.*

Papa Arc: It's easy to think, maybe there is love and then there's the performer in me always trying to get your mom turned on.

Weiss: (Scandalous...)

Papa Arc: I pull her hair, choke her lightly or not so lightly.

Ruby: (I wish Jaune will do that to me one day.🥵)

Jaune: Dad! When you were my age. What was the cost of a loaf of bread.

Papa Arc: The focus becomes how hot she gets. How many times I can make her shudder with pleasure.

RWBY: *giggling*

Jaune: Allright this is enough... *gets tackled to the ground*

Ruby: Don't, disturb your dad! 😠 *gag Jaune's mouth*

Jaune: *muffled scream*

Yang: Dad. What do mom boobs look like?

Papa Arc: I'll tell you Yang they're perfect. Creamy, twins with faint blue veins running over them like cooling streams I can wash my face in it...

Yang: Oh that's hot.... *starts rubbing herself.*

Blake: Hmmph! You never get this hot when you're with me...

Yang: Really? Maybe I should change that then... *long sensual kiss*

So how do you like it my kitty cat?

Blake: ... It's a start. *return kiss*

Ren: Shouldn't we stop this?

Nora: What! No I say we join in and turned it into an orgy.

Ren: Wait, what? *gets mounted by Nora*

Papa Arc: Of course it still wasn't enough for the both of us...

Ruby: So Jaune... Now that everyone are enjoying themselves. Maybe you want to do it with me too? 😊

Jaune: Ruby I...

Pyrrha: You can't! b-because Jaune is mine... *kiss Jaune*

Ruby: *gasp* (How could Pyrrha NTR Jaune away from me? He's mine I saw him first!😫)

Papa Arc: ... And even then we still weren't satisfied. It got so bad your mom decided to bring another woman into our bed to spice things up, as she puts it. Oh, the looks on your mother's face as I plow the other woman in front of her. Turns out your mom likes to look.

Ruby: (Could that be the solution. Me, Jaune and Pyrrha? I mean I do find the both of them to be extremely hot... Ah, who am I kidding. YOLO.) Pyrrha. Can you let me join with you and Jaune? 😇

Pyrrha: Well since you ask nicely...

Jaune: Wait, what do you mean by that? Pyrrha, Ruby why are the two of you looking at me like that??! No, no, no, stay away!!!

Weiss:

(No one wants to be with me 😢)

Papa Arc: And that's why Jaune you probably have another half-sibling running around right now... Oh, you having an Orgy in there? Don't let me stop you, son. But do remember to use protection. Unless you want to have an unexpected surprise like me. But seriously use a condom or I will castrate you... Oops. Gotta go Jaune. My egg fooyong is finally here.

Beacon Academy.

Cardin: ... That's why my Dad walked out of his Dad's funeral & I will walk out of my dad's funeral!

Peter: Great presentation Cardin. Now Jaune you're up. Show me your report on your father.

Jaune: I-I'm sorry, Professor Port but my dad wasn't really willing to answer the questions.

Peter: Nonsense young man. I give you an entire week. What were you even doing all those time?

Ruby: More like what haven't we been doing? 🤭

Pyrrha: *giggle* Stop it Ruby, you going to get us into trouble.

Ruby: I can't help it Pyr. So. Same thing tonight? 😉

Pyrrha: Most definitely, we're not going to let Jaune get any sleep tonight. If you know what I mean.

Peter: Why if I don't know any better, I think you are trying to get out of this assignment?

Jaune: Okay. Is that what you think? Okay professor Port here we go.

*Walks up to the front of the class*

Jaune: *click* Hey dad, I'm calling in front of my history class. So who was the councilman when you were a kid?

Papa Arc: Oh, I don't know but I guess I think about killing myself pretty frequently. And why not. What so great about living? You know when I'm happy? For about five seconds when I first wake up. Before I remember who I am and what my life is about. Anxiety, disappointment, diarrhea more often than not. I don't know if there's an afterlife. But who cares. Nothingness couldn't be worse than my meaningless March through my empty days.

Jaune: You see professor Port... Professor Port?

Peter: He's right, it's pointless, Salem will kill us all... Life Dismissed. *jumps through the window*

Nora: I guess class is over?

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wu-sisyphus-gang · 7 days

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Yang: Who is that?

Jaune: Must be Klein. The man Weiss asked to walk her down the aisle. I need to ask him for his blessing to marry her.

Yang: Gods. Not having a good relationship with your father must suck.

Blake: *nods*

Jaune: You're right. It does suck.

Yang: *Bursts out laughing* Gods you really don't have anything. I shouldn't laugh I'm sorry.

Jaune: I think I'm having things given to me as good as the things being stolen from me. I think.

Blake: You're wrong. Your life suck, Jaune.

Jaune: *laughs alongside Yang*

Yang: *still laughing* It's not funny!

Jaune: It's a little funny. You can laugh. People laugh at things they don't understand and if they didn't they wouldn't be able to react to most things. It's funny. Laugh.

Blake: But you shouldn't.

Jaune: *wipes a tear from his eye* I don't know what else to do. Now. Weiss doesn't care or at least she says she doesn't care. But she cared enough to ask that man to walk her down the aisle. So I'm going to ask him for his blessing to marry her. Because I love her and would do anything for her. And it might reward me with that little soft centered smile she wears when she's truly happy and it costs me nothing. So I'm gonna. Wish me luck.

Yang: Go get 'em tiger.

#yang xiao long #blake belladonna #rwby #rwby incorrect quotes #jaune arc #weiss schnee #whiteknight #white knight #motion sickness #klein sieben

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juanarc-thethird · 6 months

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Be My House Husband

Guess what! I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more Coco x Jaune! -----------------

Jaune: *Cooking*

Coco: *Looking at him work* Hey Jaune...

Jaune: Hm?

Coco: How do you feel about being a house husband?

Jaune: Sorry?

Coco: I mean you're good at cleaning, cooking, and fixing problems around the house. You are the perfect candidate for the job.

Jaune: Thanks? I guess... But why the question?

Coco: Be my house husband, Jaune.

Jaune: *Confuse* Do you mean like in a work sense?

Coco: No, I want you to marry me.

Jaune: *Blushing* Eh?!

Coco: *Smiling* Gosh, you're so cute when you're blushing.

Jaune: *Upset* Stop making fun of me.

Coco: I'm not. I really want you to be my husband.

Jaune: Yeah right, as if I believed that the coolest girl on the planet would date a moron like me.

Coco: *Serious* Jaune, you're wonderful just the way you are. I love you.

Jaune: *Gasp!* *Red* Y-You-

*TING!* The stove clock goes off

Jaune: T-The food is ready!! I have to tell the othersI! See you later!! *Leaves*

Coco: *Smug* Playing hard to get, huh? You're on.

#Jaune arc #jaune #rwby jaune arc #rwby jaune #rwby coco adel #coco adel #rwby coco #coco #rwby jaune x coco #jaune x coco #Be my house husband AU #rwby shitpost #rwby

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howlingday · 3 months

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Jaune: Auntie Raven~! (Jumps into her arms)

Raven: (Catches him, Hugs) Jaune! It's been so long and you've gotten so big! How old are you now?

Jaune: 17!

Raven: (Pushes him away) That's the same age as my friend, Yang, here!

Yang: (Whispers) Thank you!

Raven: (Whispers) That's not what I meant, and you don't stand a chance!

Yang: I'm sorry, but I can't believe that someone so cute and friendly could ever be related to someone as old and stuffy as Raven!

Raven: (Gasps)

Jaune: (Grabs Yang's hand) Hey, let me show you around while the old people have their talk!

Raven: Don't you do it, Yang.

Yang: I would love to~!

Raven: I can get away with murder in this town, Yang!

Yang: Oh, come on, Raven. We're just having fun~! (Runs off with Jaune)

Raven: THEY'LL FIND PIECES OF YOU IN VACUO AND YOUR FATHER WILL NEVER ASK WHY, YANG! REEEEEEEEEEEEE!

#rwby #my hero academia the movie 2 Heroes abridged #joyride entertainment #jaune arc #yang xiao long #raven branwen #my hero academia abridged #my hero abridged #dragonslayer

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rwby-encrusted-blog · 8 months

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Arculus Rift; How it happened

Penny: Hello Friend Jaune! Friend Ruby has Suggested I spend more time around people other than her to broaden my 'scope of the world!' I was wondering if you would spend time with me at some point?

Jaune: I mean, I don't see why not? When are you free? I have Team Leader stuff and Extra Credit stuff to do on Weekdays.

Penny: I am available on Weekends. How does this Saturday at 3:45 sound to watch Herbert; Sting-Rays of Love at the Valean Eastern Theatre?

Jaune: Oh! Sure, Yeah I loved watching that movie as a kid! Sounds like a date!

Penny: *Blushing* A Date? Oh! Yes! Okay then! I will be ready to meet you on Saturday!

Jaune: *Oblivious* Sweet! See you then, Penny!

~~~~~~

Jaune: Hey Pennnnnnn....

Penny: *In a dress and Makeup, positively glowing* Good afternoon Jaune.

Jaune: Whoa. Penny! you look amazing! Why are you so dressed up?

Penny: For our Date? Do you not Remember?

Jaune: *internally* "Sounds like a Date!"

Jaune: Ah. I- I didn't mean a romantic date, I just meant- I misspoke. I forgot you take things very literally.

Penny: *Visibly Deflating* Oh. I'm sorry I misunderstood you. If things have been made awkward, then I do not mind if we must reschedule or ... If you do not wish to 'Hang out' after this.

Jaune: Nah, penny, I messed up. I'd still like to spend time with you, I'm just sorry I got your hopes up or whatever. We're still here! We still had plans. I'll even pay- I uh, had planned on doing that anyway.

Penny: Oh! well I would also still like to spend time with you! And there is no need to pay, I have brought my own lien for payment!

Jaune: Penny, i insist that I pay for my mistake, literally-

Ticket Teller: ... I don't get paid enough for this.

#rwby #jaune arc #penny polendina #arculus rift #rwby shitpost

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