#i'm still watching the season but this scene was too pretty not to gif

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - new entries upset the rankings

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

April 2024 Wk 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 11 of 12 - Like most Thai BL pulps, this show doesn’t have much story to it. But I'm discovering that what it does have I actually really enjoy. I love that the gay boys got to play matchmaker for a change and I like how just GAY they are. It's nice. Refreshing.

We Are (Weds GMMTV iQIYI) ep 1-2 of 16 - University ensemble BL featuring PondPhuwin, WinnySatang, AouBoom, MarcPawinPoon. I like it. It’s old school Thai BL, but having fun with itself and its tropes. I’m not expecting much, so I don’t mind it waffling. All the couples are comfy. Chemistry is okay. Friendships are nifty. I like Pond's floppy hair. We fine. 

Two Worlds (Thurs IQIYI) ep 5 of 10 - What an extremely bloody episode. And bad guy turned out to be very bad indeed. And now pretty much everyone is dead. Nice kiss. Of course. 

Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 6 of 8 - It’s cute, they happy, not a ton happened. Random gratuitous bathing. As you do in BL. And I still think the sides should just end up in a thrupple

Only Boo! (Sun YouTube) ep 2 of 12 - Oh they very cute. Also very silly. 

1000 Years Old (Thurs iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - No. NOT THE GUITAR. YES abandon guitar for the sniff test! Love this for them. And me. My most favorite trope defeated my least favorite trope. VICTORY!!!  

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Unknown (Taiwan Tues YouTube & Viki) ep 8 of 11 - It’s just so good. Baby went away, grew up, and learned how to become a temptation... and a husband. 

Gray Shelter AKA Gray Currents (Korea Thurs iQIYI) 1 of 5 eps - SooHyuk, only just surviving, reunites with YoonDae, his (brief) younger stepbrother who feels abandoned. They end up living together. The younger brother is played by Lee Jae Bin of Choco Milk Shake. OMG. STEPBROTHERS TROPE. Lucky me! Two in one season. Yay!!!! It's Korea so great visuals too. I shallow but yeah, this is great.

Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - Kindly Ryota goes off to uni only to find his new roommate is his childhood bestie, Kazuhito. Kazuhito doesn’t have a girlfriend and Ryota tries to help him figure out why. Same director as Old Fashion Cupcake. It’s utterly charming. I am charmed. Also the framing is gorgeous (of course). Very stylish.

Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 6fin - I don’t know. Kind of a flat ending with the leads apart for most of it. I enjoyed this show but it never really hit with me. 

Summation

After a teen betrayal and resulting separation a reporter reunites with his first love. That love wants him back. I enjoyed the authenticity of a reunion romance explored in Japan's quintessentially contemplative yet surreal way. The juxtaposition of the tenderness of the sex scenes with this Japanese style of authenticity was oddly elegant but all in all this still fell a little flat for me. There's nothing objectively wrong with it, but in total the narrative felt sluggish and the main couple were just... stiff (in the wrong way). Frankly, I'd rather just rewatch Tokyo in April is. 8/10

Love is like a Cat (Korea Mon Viki) eps 3-4 of 12 - What is going on with this show? No, I get the plot. I just don't get the show or why I’m watching it. Annoying. 

It's done, but I suck

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps

To Be Continued (Sat C3 Thailand grey) ep 7-8fin - I can't for the life of me find the final 2 episodes. Haven't had a real hunt, but yeah. No dice so far.

It's airing but...

Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari (Japan Furritsubs) eps 1-? of 10 - I may wait and binge it.

Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school. Not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing.

Kiseki Chapter 2 (Sun iQIYI) 6 eps - It’s so boring DNFed at 2.

Close Friend Season 3: Soju Bomb! (Weds iQIYI) 6 - The problem with situational comedy BL is it must be situational, comedic and a BL. This show gets 1 of 3 claims correct. 33% is not a passing grade. Dropped at 3.

Memory in the Letter (Thai WeTV) - only 4 eps, tell me if I should bother?

Next Week Looks Like This:

4/18 At 25:00 in Alaska AKA 25 Ji Akasaka de (Japan Thurs Gaga) 10 eps - Yuki lands his first starring role in a BL drama alongside superstar Asami (previously his senior at uni). Said superstar suggests they form a sham relationship until filming concludes. As they actually begin to fall in love, the spotlight begins to burn. I think I've seen this before (joke) and also the trailer doesn't inspire confidence.

Still to Come in April

4/25 Boys Be Brave! AKA Roommates (Korea Thurs Viki) 8 eps - Trailer Jung Ki Sub is Kim Jin Woo's slacker friend - and secret crush. So when Ki Sub crashes at his place, his heart tingles to be near him everyday. But as the short stay turns into permanent mooch, how long can Jin Woo keep his true feelings under wraps and hold back from confessing?

4/26 My Stand-In (Thai iQIYI) 12 eps - adaptation of Chinese novel "Professional Body Double" by Shui Qiang Cheng. Stars Up (Lovely Writer) and Poom (Bake Me Please) directed by the same team as KP (not a recommendation IMHO - my biggest criticism of that show was the clashing directing styles). This one looks complicated, lemme try: Joe is a stuntman for famous actor Tong. Joe falls in love with Ming but Ming sees Joe as nothing more than a Tong-replacement. After learning this horrible truth, Joe dies. Joe then wakes up in the body of another man also named Joe. He manages to rebuild the same life as before—with the same people eventually re-meeting Ming. Ming wants Joe back but Joe doesn't understand why. But Ming seems to know what's going on and wants to give him some kind of explanation.

I'm exhausted just trying to describe the plot.

Knock-Knock Boys (Thai WeTV) - 4 college friends conspire to help their friend lose his virginity. Familiar faces like Seng (yes, Billy's previous pairing) and Best, news here. But will it actually air this month?

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

NOTE: It looks like one of my personal favorites of last year Unintentional Love Story is getting a spin off!

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENT

Sniff test turning into a make out sesh? Please and thank you. City of Stars

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a bother.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly

If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy.

#this week in BL #review Love is Better the Second Time Around #Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto #BL updates #Two Worlds #We Are the series #Only Boo! #Deep Night #City of Stars #Unknown the series #Gray Shelter #Living With Him #Kare no Iru Seikatsu #1000 Years Old #At 25:00 in Alaska #25 Ji #Akasaka de #Love Is like a Cat #BL series review #upcoming BL #BL news #BL reviews #BL gossip #Thai BL #Japanese BL #live action yaoi #Taiwanese BL #Koren BL #BL starting soon #BL coming soon

[nipuni]

OHHHHHHHHH MY GOD ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'LL NEVER BE THE SAME AFTER THIS!!!!!! THIS ENDING?? THIS WHOLE EVERYTHING!!!!! WHERE DO I EVEN START I'M SO STUNNED!!!! WHAT!!!!!

"The end of time" was the most incredible ending I could have asked for!!! We finished watching it all at 3am last night and we spent all of today yelling about it, I can't believe just how good this was!!! I'm so glad we've never watched this show before while this was airing so that we get to watch it all fresh for the first time because we are having the time of our lives now

It was completely devastating and so so inspiring, just exactly how I was hoping for it to be, I already want to rewatch S1 to S4 all over again 😭 the sheer comfort I get from the character of the doctor is insane, I've never rooted for a character so hard and wholeheartedly in my life, he really is the most wonderful being in the universe I'm in tears I'm Wilfred rn what the fuck man I'll never recover from this!!! I feel like a ten year old kid with a new superhero GOD IT WAS ALL SO GOOD I CAN'T ARTICULATE I'd yell about each scene but I'm aware that pretty much everyone has watched this ages ago so you know and I still wouldn't want to spoil anyone that hasn't just in case because going into this unspoiled and knowing nothing about it has been the most satisfying experience ever and I hope more people get to have it too!!! please if you haven't watched this before go do that!! and if you have and it's been a while do it again!!! the acting?? INSANE!! the writing!! incredible!! I have only good things to say!!! I only wish we had 1000 more seasons with RTD and David Tennant I really love this man, I'm so sad to see him go!!! and so happy to get him back for the 60 special!!

When we got to the last episodes of season 4 I was expecting pain and instead I got an unexpected fix-it device that was rather strange but cute so I was somewhat relieved and confused, then the holidays specials were pretty standard and lighthearted AND THEN THE WATERS OF MARS? INSANE EPISODE, I loved it so much, that whole part at the end FANTASTIC they went there and I LOVE them for it!! another favourite episode for sure, and THEN THE END OF TIME?? by this point Nicolas and I were twisted into a single pretzel on the couch bracing ourselves, it went from extremely intense to SO FUNNY to heartbreaking and just...amazing!!! AAAAAA anyway!! I had to get all that out of my system, now onwards to S5!!! I'm curious to meet Matt Smith's doctor 😊

#doctor who #I'm so sorry in advance for the person I'm becoming I WILL be (more) insufferable about it #rotating the doctor in my mind at 9000 rpm while I work #I wonder what will change from S5 onwards!! will the writing be different!! will I like the new doctor!! I'm scared #personal #DW report

[pandorasprongs]

JAMIE TARTT | call it what you want.

PAIRING: jamie tartt x fem!reader

WORD COUNT: 5.7k

SUMMARY: reader's family comes to visit london and she ends up having to hide her relationship with jamie till the final game of the season.

WARNINGS: language, innuendos

A/N: this is technically a sequel to my comfort crowd story that was my first one about jamie, but it can be read as a standalone too! would recommend reading it first since it gives a little backstory to the garden and reader's past relationship. also, you'll probably be able to tell that i rewatched match scene in the finale for a certain scene AHAHAHA i really wanted to show jamie's more affectionate side, so there's def a few cheesy scenes in here! the title is taken from 'call it what you want' by taylor swift

It's midnight when you hear a knock on your door. Any reasonable person would've ignored it and/or hid in case it was some axe murderer. Of course, you knew it wasn't a murderer, just your boyfriend.

"I thought I said you couldn't stay over tonight?" You say when you open the door to reveal Jamie, whose expression quickly turns into a pouty face.

"I know, but I missed you," You playfully roll your eyes, yet are unable to stop your smile. Christ, he could be annoying, but he could also be pretty sweet. Those two balanced each other out.

"Fine, come in, but you can’t sleep here," You take his hand and bring him inside your flat. He plants a kiss on your temple and the two of you settle down on the couch, which for you was a deserved reward.

The reason why you were up so late despite having to work in the morning was that you had been trying to make your place spotless before your brother and his family came to visit the next day. They had already been in England for a few days but were only coming to London now to visit you and to attend the final Richmond match of the season.

"How's the cleaning going?" Jamie asks, as he wraps one arm around you and reaches for the remote in the other one.

"Took five hours, but at least it’s done." You sigh as you settle closer to Jamie. Even if you had warned him not to come over tonight, you still appreciated his presence.

When you started dating, you never expected the football player to be so clingy, but not even a day after your first date, he was already hanging around you every chance he got.

You couldn’t even hide it from the team because the moment Sam caught the two of you arriving at the clubhouse together, that was it for you guys. They were happy for the two of you, though sometimes too happy, especially whenever you had to call Jamie for a physical and they automatically assumed it was code for something.

"How was practice?"

"Good. The team's having a hard time mastering the start though. The timing's always off," He explains about the surprise goodbye performance they were doing for Ted and Beard. 

They had been planning it from the moment they heard the news the two of them were leaving for Kansas at the end of the season. Well, right after they all finished processing — through crying, screaming, protesting, and the like — the news.

"You guys will do fine," you take the remote from his hand and start looking for a certain movie. "Plus, even if you fuck it up, I’m sure they’ll love it regardless." That gets Jamie to chuckle and you feel the vibrations from his chest.

"How about this? Let's watch the Sound of Music, so you can try and copy one of the von Trapp siblings!" You suggest as you press play on the movie. Jamie doesn't protest and simply wraps his other arm around you too.

You look up at your boyfriend and suddenly feel a pang of guilt. "I'm really sorry,"

You don't need to explain further because Jamie instantly understands. He kisses you on your forehead, "Stop saying that. I know you don't want your family to know you're dating such a talented football player because you're afraid one of them will try and steal me from you."

You remove yourself from Jamie before playfully pushing his head. "Yeah, that's exactly right." The both of you laugh as Jamie pulls you in again.

You had already explained why you were hiding it from them back when you found out they were visiting. You had already been dating Jamie for a couple of months, but not a single person back home knew. 

Most of your family knew about the disastrous way your last relationship ended and you were sure they'd be extra protective about the next guy. As much as you loved being with Jamie and knew he wasn’t that guy anymore, you knew that your football-obsessed family was aware of who he used to be.  Stories of the multiple scandals, hook-ups, and rumors of unsportsmanlike conduct throughout the years were the exact reason you were so afraid to tell them. Those were in the past and you knew that, but you weren’t so sure how to convince your family of that, too. 

Jamie, true to form as the prick he is, completely understood and never tried to pressure you to tell them. He was even the one to tell the whole team that your brother was coming to visit and they had to, in his words, shut the fuck up about your relationship.

This was probably the last night for a few days you two could comfortably spend together, so you didn't really want to force him away. The two of you just sat there watching a Julie Andrews classic where you'd occasionally hear Jamie sing along to the musical numbers.

It was around 2 am when the movie finished and now, he definitely had to go home. Even then, you had a hard time separating yourself from Jamie, but your rational brain was telling you it would be bad for a secret relationship if your family caught him in the apartment.

"See you tomorrow, yeah?" Jamie says as he opens the front door.

Instead of responding, you plant a kiss on his lips, catching him by surprise. He's quick to wrap his arms around your waist as he reciprocates it. You separate and finally, answer him. "Yup, see you tomorrow." Jamie gives you one last hug and a kiss on the cheek before he leaves your apartment. 

You look around your place for a second, seeing if there's anything you need to fix up before tomorrow. Once you assess that it's as clean as it can be, you go to your room and catch some much-needed sleep.

——

When you hear a knock at your door, you drag yourself out of your bed and to the living room. Before you can even twist the doorknob, you hear a voice on the other side, "You should be awake by now!"

"I am!" you respond, as you open the door. You're greeted by the sight of your older brother Frank, your sister-in-law Denise, and their son Gregory.

"Hello, family," you say drowsily, as the three of them envelope you with a hug. Once they let go, you lead them inside your apartment. "How's your vacation so far?"

"Oh, amazing. I get why you moved to Europe," Denise answers, as she looks around your flat. "They have you set up pretty nice here, huh?" She plops down on your couch and pulls Gregory down next to her.

"Yup," you head to the kitchen to make the three of them some drinks. "So, what do you two plan to do while Gregory comes to work with me?" They had already told you ages ago that Gregory wanted to visit the clubhouse badly, but you knew it was also free babysitting.

"Sightseeing mostly," your brother replies, grabbing his cup of tea from you. When you take a seat next to Denise and your nephew, the former leans into you and whispers, "And get into places where 18 and unders can't." 

You chuckle and she plants a kiss on her son's head. As they enjoy their drinks, the three of you start catching up. You steer clear of any questions about relationships and instead focus on you being a physical therapist for a football team.

"Do their feet smell?" Gregory asks and you nod your head.

"Extremely, so always remember to wash your feet, okay?" You reply and the 8-year-old gives you a thumbs up and drinks his hot chocolate.

The topic then shifts to the upcoming final game between Richmond and West Ham. You managed to get the 3 of them tickets, — thank you, Higgins, — which they said was the perfect way to end their trip.

"I'll get you some shirts today, too. Gregory's gonna help me pick them out, yeah?" You turn to your nephew who is more than excited to do so.

"Nice," your brother reacts. "I'd appreciate an Obisanya one."

"Yup, and I want a Colin Hughes one if they're available. And of course, this one here," Denise pulls Gregory into a hug, "wants the captain's jersey."

"Will do," you make a mental note, before excusing yourself to get ready for work. 

You’re freshening up in your bathroom when you hear your nephew call out to you. "Mom's asking if you have an extra blanket!" 

"Check my room!" You hear him go to the room across and as he passes you again, he shouts a quick 'Thank you!'

Once you’re done getting changed, you head back to the living room. All three of them were ready to head out, so you lock up and hail a taxi to the AFC Richmond clubhouse. On the drive there, the seatbelt was practically the only thing stopping Gregory from bouncing up and down in the car. 

When you get there, you find some members of the team along with the Director of Football Operations standing front and center near the entrance of the building. You thank the driver and grab Gregory by the hand. You say goodbye to his parents, and since they’re so excited to have some alone time, they don't even bother looking up at the scene in front of them.

"What's all this?" You say as you approach the entrance. Gregory, despite his excitement, was now walking more cautiously, lagging behind you. When they hear your voice, the team finally settles down.

"Well, a little birdie told me that you'd be bringing someone special to work today and so we decided to assemble the Richmond Welcome Committee for him." You stare at all of them in disbelief and your smile grows wider. You find Jamie in the group, whose smug expression tells you exactly who it was.

"Hello there, Gregory," Higgins turns to your nephew and sticks his hand out, who is still hiding behind you. You move to the side and crouch down next to him, so he feels more at ease.

"Hi," your nephew finally speaks up and shakes his hand. 

Higgins then bends down to the eye level of your nephew. "Welcome to AFC Richmond! We prepared a little gift for you if that's okay."

Gregory nods his head. Higgins and the rest of the team start doing a drumroll and move out of the way to reveal Isaac, with a personalized jersey. You exhale in disbelief and turn to your nephew. 

"What do you say, Greg?" Said nephew was too awestruck by his favorite player to even move. 

After a few seconds, he finally ran up to Isaac and hugged his favorite player. The team captain was now the one in shock, but slowly reciprocated it. Gregory then lets go and accepts the jersey from him. The rest of the team moves to crowd the boy and start talking with him. Almost immediately, your nephew transforms from his former terrified state to the life of the party.

You moved to the side to give them space and thank Higgins, who just shook his head. "It's no problem," he started. "Henry doesn't come here that often anymore, so it was nice to do this for another kid." You smile, before noticing Jamie going toward you.

"And here's the little birdie now," Higgins jokes before excusing himself. You see the team busy entertaining Gregory, so you take the chance to plant a kiss on Jamie's cheek.

"If only the tabloids knew how sweet the striker of AFC Richmond could be." You whisper afterward.

"I know, I'm a great not-boyfriend." He continues to show his smug smirk and before you can reply, you notice that your nephew is starting to look for you.

You put enough distance between you and Jamie to seem platonic, "Greg?" You catch his attention and see him already wearing his jersey over his shirt.

"Can we go inside now?" He asks and you nod your head.

You turn back to the "welcome committee," and thank them. "This was so great." They wave goodbye to the both of you — with Isaac giving Gregory a high-five — as they head to the field for training.

Once you're alone again, Gregory turns to you. "That was so much fun!" You laugh at the boy's reaction as you settle down in your office.

For about 2 hours, you had to deal with the boy asking you about every detail of the papers in front of you. Vitals, size charts, diagrams, he was curious about all of it. A part of you hoped that he'd want to talk about something, anything else, but you soon regret wishing that.

"Auntie (Y/N), is Jamie Tartt your favorite player?" You try and hide your shock at the question. He's 8 years old and it's probably an innocent question.

"Yes, he is." You answer honestly and turn your chair to the treatment table where Gregory was lying down. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, I saw you talking to him earlier." He observes, sitting up and looking like he's about to launch into a whole monologue. "And I saw a lot of his jerseys in your room too, so I thought you must be a fan. But you work here, so are you guys close?"

Maybe you should have closed the closet door before sending him in there. You try and keep your calm. "Kind of. I mean I'm close to all of the players, in a way."

If Gregory thinks anything is off, he doesn't show it. Instead, he nods his head and goes back to his comic book as you continue to work on some reports for the players.

Once you finish, you bring Gregory to watch the morning training. His parents were going to pick him up during lunch, so you only had to keep up the charade for just a little longer. The team was doing a few drills when you got there and Ted spots the two of you approaching. He immediately runs over and greets, "Is this the little guy? Hi, I'm Ted."

What was it with dads and shaking little kid's hands? Gregory, already getting used to meeting such famous football personnel, took his hand and shook it as firmly as an 8-year-old could. Jamie was too busy with his drills to notice you there and you’ve never been more relieved about that.

After spending the next hour watching the game from the stands, it was time for lunch and you headed to the car park to find Frank and Denise. You smile at them and hand off Gregory who started telling his parents about his brand-new personalized kit.

You feel your phone vibrate and take it out to find a message from Jamie. secret boyfriend bought secret lunch for a secret date in your office ;)

You chuckle at the message and send him a quick reply before hearing Gregory mention your name. "Auntie's friends with all the players, especially Jamie Tartt. He's her favorite and they're close."

Oh, this child is going to ruin you. You try and stop yourself from overreacting, though you instead end up letting out an exaggerated laugh. "Yeah, I mentioned him being my favorite player, but he seemed to forget that I said I'm also close with all the players, not just Jamie."

Frank seemed to buy it, but you can tell that Denise was starting to pick up on things. She could always tell when you were lying, even before you left for London. After you had broken up with Matt, it took one call before she realized what happened. So it was only a matter of time till she figured it out, but you had hoped you could delay it till after their trip. You wave to the three of them as their taxi left the car park.

You headed back to your office to find Jamie already devouring his pasta. "Hey, I thought this was supposed to be a date?" His head snaps towards you with noodles still hanging out of his mouth.

"I didn't know how long you'd take and I need my carbs." You roll your eyes as you go to the seat across from him. Jamie puts his plate down and brings out yours.

The two of you start talking about the upcoming game this Sunday, to which you bring up your usual 'night before' ritual.

"I thought your family was gonna stay at your flat that night?" Jamie asks, but you just shrug.

"I'll find a way to escape. No way you're going to the garden without me. I'm your good luck charm, Mr. Tartt." You lean towards the football player and playfully narrow your eyes at him. He breaks into a smile and takes your hand into his.

"Yeah, you are." He says softly, and your smile starts to fade. Jamie would never say it out loud, certainly not in the clubhouse where his teammates could hear him, but his nerves always reached an all-time high before a big game. Even after the Man City match and the talk with his mum, you noticed he still felt uneasy in the days leading up to this one.

He was good at hiding it from most people, but over the months, you figured out the small tells that showed he wasn't feeling his best. That's one of the reasons Dr. Sharon suggested he find a safe space, one where he could collect himself before a game, especially like the game on Sunday.

"Hey," You get him to look back at you and squeeze his hand tighter. "You and the whole team are going to dominate. You've already guaranteed a spot in the Champions League, so you’re set for next season. Plus, your beautiful and frankly, awesome girlfriend is gonna be there in the dugout cheering you on."

Jamie pulls you in for a quick kiss as a thank you before you start to fix up the table. He then suggests a rather inappropriate after-lunch activity — "Ay! Call it a motivational activity," — and you have to physically push him out the door for his afternoon practice.

——

It's the night before the match and you were currently arguing with your brother about the sleeping situation.

"Frank, I'll be fine. There's three of you, it's a king-sized bed, and you know I love couches." This time, he gives in. You watch him disappear into your room and after five minutes, you start heading out.

You go down to find a parked car outside, with its owner leaning on the side of it scrolling through his phone. Since you had dinner with family and he got a drink with Roy, the two of you had planned to meet up later than usual.

"Told you I still knew how to sneak out." You say to him, and the moment his eyes land on you, his expression seems to relax. You approach him and ask, "How was hanging out with Roy?"

"Weird, but good," he answered as the two of you got into the car. "Told me he was proud of me."

"That's nice of him. After all those training sessions and him barging on both our doors early morning, you deserve it." You’re reminded of when Roy came to your flat at 4 am after he realized that Jamie wasn't at his own house, which ended with you scolding the coach about it.

You didn't want to make a big deal of it, but you knew how much Jamie appreciated hearing that from someone he looked up to since childhood. Especially with their history back when Jamie first joined the team.

He continued to tell you about what went down, even mentioning how he convinced Roy to go to Keeley that night and finally ask her out again. Though, he admitted he partly did that was so they could finish earlier and he could see you.

You get to the garden and despite visiting it almost every week, you’re still amazed at its beauty. You remember the first time he brought you there before you were even dating. You had been so touched that Jamie was willing to share this place with you that you ended up kissing him right then and there. 

Ever since then, you ended up going with him before games, even if the two of you would just sit there in silence and simply take in the surroundings. That's exactly what was happening tonight, with you and Jamie sitting on a bench and just observing the garden.

After a while, you took the chance to look at Jamie without him noticing. He was always the most calm here and you could tell it from his side profile alone. His jaw was relaxed, his eyes were closed and he was breathing steadily.

You suddenly get the urge to admit something. "I'll tell Frank and Denise tomorrow." Jamie looks at you as you repeat, "I'm telling them about us tomorrow, after the game."

The football player breaks into a smile, and you can't help but mirror it. If the two of them could only get a glimpse of the Jamie you knew, who was thoughtful, enthusiastic, and truly kind-hearted, they wouldn't even care about all the dumb stories of the past. 

After a little while longer, Jamie drives you home and you give him a quick goodbye kiss before heading back to your flat. You try to be as quiet as possible, turning the knob ever so slowly. You soon realized you didn't have to, as you hear someone clear their throat. You open the door to find Denise sitting on the couch in her pajamas and you freeze. "You went out?"

"Yes," you finally managed to croak out, as you closed the door behind you and leaned on it. "Wanted some fresh air."

"Fresh air? From the car I just saw you get out of?" Denise crosses her arms and you accept defeat. You say nothing as your sister-in-law asks, "Who's the guy?"

"Jamie Tartt," you admit, and her eyes almost pop out of her head.

"Oh shit, you are dating him. I really thought Gregory was just exaggerating things." You roll your eyes and join her on the couch.

You quickly plead, "Please don't tell Frank yet. I promise I’ll tell him after the match. You know, just in case he gets an urge to do bodily harm to my boyfriend."

"Come on, you know he wouldn't actually do that." You tilt your head. She adds, "He probably wouldn't. But fine, I'll keep it from him." You sigh in relief until she starts giving you a look. "So, Jamie Tartt, huh?"

You groan. "Oh God, can we not do this right now? What's wrong with him?"

"Nothing! I just didn't think you'd go for a guy like him. You know, more laidback with a slight douchy vibe."

"He is not a douche!" You're quick to defend Jamie, but now Denise narrows her eyes at you. "Not anymore. He was the one who planned that jersey thing for Greg. Would a douche do something like that?"

"Okay, okay, I believe you. He doesn’t seem like the prick from before." Denise holds her hands up in surrender. "But, I only know that because of how you're acting now." She nudges you on the shoulder and you tilt your head. 

"Look, you just seem happier, lighter. Much better than when you were with Matt. I was never going to admit it, but you should’ve ended things after college. Nothing was too toxic about your relationship, but you always looked like you were holding something back."

It was true. It took a few months of not being with him anymore to realize just how many red flags he had. Yes, he was smart, polite, and always knew exactly what to say, but he was also the first to criticize you when you didn't live up to his “standard.” You had convinced yourself that he was only trying to make you better, but in reality, he was just an ass. 

Being with Jamie is what convinced you of that. He got you out of your comfort zone to enjoy things, without ever making it feel like he was pressuring you. You did the same for him too, and instead of pushing back like Matt always did, Jamie would actually listen to what you had to say and cared what you thought.

You explain all of that to Denise and at the end of it, you're sure she's starting to see why you fell for Jamie in the first place. "I'm glad you're happy." 

You hug your sister-in-law tightly before you both start getting tired. Everyone had to get up early tomorrow, so it was best to get some rest before then.

You're already lying down and tucked into the couch, but you grab your phone and send a quick message to Jamie.

i hope you're sleeping because this is for when you wake up tomorrow. good luck and i know you'll be the best fucking player on the field!

You hit the send button before returning your phone to the table and drifting off to sleep.

——

You had planned on getting to the clubhouse earlier than usual. You had to prepare for the match and your family didn’t want to push through a bunch of people to get to their seats. 

But even then, there was already a crowd around the building. Maybe it was because this was your first time working here with the team making it to the finals, but you've never seen that many AFC Richmond fans present.

You had separated from the three of them once they got their tickets and insisted they could find their seats on their own. Because of all the chaos of getting ready and setting up with the whole crowd, you hadn't gotten a chance to check if Jamie had replied or even look for him.

It was only when Will showed up at the dugout saying that Jamie was looking for you did you see him for the first time today.

"I've been waiting for my good luck kiss," is how he greets you and you can only laugh as you embrace him. He met you outside of the locker room, so you avoided all the whistles and 'oohs' from his teammates. 

You give him a quick kiss before telling him about last night. You could see his relief when he realized that your sister-in-law did approve of him, which you almost felt guilty about. 

Jamie Tartt, world-renowned football player, was nervous about what a relative of yours thought about him. 

"I'll tell Frank later. And, if you guys win the game, maybe he won't come after you and injure your other ankle." You remind him and he chuckles, but your straight face is enough for him to take it seriously.

"Shit. I guess we do have to win." 

After hearing Ted asking everyone to huddle up, you separate from Jamie and the two of you join the crowd inside the locker room. You with the rest of the physical therapists and Jamie with the players.

You had to admit, you were a bit nervous for the game. You knew the team was doing great, but after their crying session right before the match, you were worried they'd be too teary-eyed to make it through. And in the first half, you were right to be. Despite their efforts, West Ham was ahead much to every Richmond supporter’s dismay. 

But after whatever happened in the locker room, they seemed to be picking it up. After those 3 misses, you and the rest of the people in the dugout were ecstatic when Jamie finally scored. 

But then it led to a whole different issue. Now, West Ham was focused on marking Jamie. From both a personal and professional standpoint, you were worried. Jamie's ankle could still easily be injured after what happened at Man City and Richmond would lose what was called "their central cog." 

You were grasping your medical bag as the game continued, ready at any moment to rush over there. You flinched when Jamie fell to the ground, but when the referee called for a penalty, you knew this was one of his tricks and you sighed in relief. 

He looks at you with one of his signature smirks as he's pulled up by Sam. You playfully shake your head and roll your eyes, as the teams get ready for the kick.

And thank God Isaac was able to get it in the net. Well, through it? You could feel Gregory's excitement over it, even if you weren't sure where they were in the crowd.

After eavesdropping on Rupert Mannion ordering his manager to "take out" Jamie, you felt a lump forming in your throat. But at least George still had some integrity, even if you ended up seeing his balls after he gets pushed. As Rupert got heckled off the pitch, Jamie catches your eyes.

He notices your worried expression and gives you a reassuring look. It was his way of saying "Don't worry, you think they can take me out?" You not as the players head back onto the field.

Even then, the players were completely boxing Jamie in, but you watched as Ted signaled a strategy for the free kick which they seem to understand quickly. Jamie's trying everything to get Bumbercatch's attention, but the moment he sends it Sam's way, you know exactly what's going on.

"Go, go, go," You whisper, on the edge of your seat. You're squeezing Will's arm a little too tight, but even he is too immersed in the game to care.

Sam gets the ball in and the whole stadium erupts in cheers. You wait, but when the final whistle was blown, you and Will start celebrating too. The whole team starts running onto the pitch and at that point, you weren't thinking. 

The moment your eyes landed on Jamie, you were running across the pitch towards him. He catches you in his arms and pulls you into a kiss. You deepen it as if you weren't surrounded by thousands of people right then and there.

You break apart for a split second to say, "You guys absolutely smashed it. I knew you would win." 

He pulls you back for another kiss, before smiling against your lips. "You aren't worried about your brother seeing us?"

The thought hadn't occurred to you at that moment, but you try and find them in the crowd, still not removing yourself from Jamie's grasp. With all the chaos, you give up and just shrug it off, turning back to the football player. 

"I don't really care anymore." You admit as you laugh.

Jamie pulls you into a hug and spins you around in the air. You laugh and hold onto him tightly. When he puts you down, you find your family coming toward the two of you. Frank is the only one who seemed shocked by this whole ordeal, with Denise simply smirking and Gregory being distracted by all the people celebrating on the field.

"Right, hi Frank," you start and you slide your hand down from his arm to intertwine it with Jamie's hand to steady yourself. "Did I forget to tell you I have a boyfriend now?"

"Yeah, I don't think it's come up, no," He replies.

Jamie takes a step forward and stretches his other arm for a handshake. "Hello, it's nice to meet you. I'm Jamie—"

"Jamie Tartt, yes." Your brother firmly grasps his hand. "I know who you are." Jamie's legs buckle slightly at Frank's strength, but Denise puts a warning hand on her husband's shoulder.

"Not too hard, honey." which prompts Frank to finally let go of Jamie.

It's a few minutes of silence, — well, as quiet as a celebrating football stadium could be — before you finally try and escape the situation. "Maybe we should let Jamie celebrate with his team!"

"Yes, of course! Congratulations, Jamie! You guys did amazing." Denise says, causing Jamie to flash a genuine smile.

"Yes, you and your team did great," Frank adds on, notably less enthusiastic. "Especially with that last shot from Obisanya." Of course, he had to add his favorite player to this.

You try and pull Jamie away to bring him to his celebrating team, but your brother pulls him into a hug, forcing you to let go of Jamie's hand. You watch Frank whisper something in his ear, before letting go. He then says out loud, "Congratulations on making the Champions League. Can't wait to see you guys play next season."

All Jamie can do is nod in gratitude, as he seems to still be processing what happened before that. You decide to thank him on your boyfriend's behalf.

"See you guys later!" You say to your family as you bring Jamie away from them, his expression slightly worrying you. Once you put a safe amount of distance between them, you whisper, "What did he say?"

"Nothing," Jamie pursed his lips. "Just that he'd make my life a living hell and find a way to ruin my career if I broke your heart." He laughs it off, but you can hear a slight shakiness in his voice.

"Alright then," you interlock your arms with Jamie's, but neither confirm nor deny the truth in his statement.

"That was a joke, right?" Jamie tries to ask but you just shrug. His face almost turns white, but you laugh and instead, he playfully narrows his eyes at you. "That's not funny."

"Well, I’m pretty sure you aren't going to break my heart, so you'll never have to find out. You plant a kiss on his cheek and remove yourself from him. “Now go, celebrate your win!" 

You push him to the rest of his teammates, who are in the middle of celebrating, but he's quick to grab your arm and pull you close. "I know how I want to celebrate this win." He moves in for yet another kiss.

You briefly wonder if this is being televised and if it might be how all your friends and family back home find out, but you'd deal with that later. Right now, it's just you and Jamie. 

And you've always wanted that celebratory field kiss.

#jamie tartt #jamie tartt x reader #ted lasso #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt fic #jamie tartt fluff #ted lasso fanfic #jamie tartt fanfic

[noneorother]

What if the Metatron is scared of Crowley?

The S2 brain rot is still going strong so I have to share my meta thoughts somewhere. I guess it's gonna be tumblr, isn't it? Would you like to spend a lot of time dissecting what the Metatron says with me? Okay here we go...

So the full line here is "He always wanted to go his own way. Always asking damned fool questions, too." I think the "Always" and the ",too." are doing some pretty heavy lifting in this sentence. Because we've seen him asking questions before the fall (more on that in another post) we assume The Metatron is referencing that time before. But what if he isn't? What if he's referencing this scene from the opening of S2E1 where Crowley is seemingly now having an existential crisis that is weirdly never referenced again in the season.

"But Crowley is always asking questions!" You cry. Yeah, he is. An the metatron is getting pretty f*&?ing sick of his shit. You want to watch another time he asks a question after this scene in S2E1?

Seems like Crowley is doing some mighty fine asking already this season! After finishing season 2 I really started wondering why The Metatron was interfering with our boys now? I mean, they were right there the whole time. The Metatron clearly knows where they are for years. Even though Crowley has been asking question for all time forever and clearly some part of heaven hates that, it seems like maybe these questions at this point in time might actually be very harmful to the Metatron's plans. Remember when Jimbriel says this in S2E1?

Except Jim never gives Azirapalalah anything the whole season? The matchbox stays in heaven. He doesn't give him the box either. It stays outside and must be fetched.

So when the metatron says "You're a leader, you're honest, you dont just tell people what they want to hear. It's why Gabriel came to you in the first place, I imagine." I think we can surmise that Gabriel was trying to come to Aziraphael to give him something important, but it never happened (OR DID IT? That's for another post...). So if The Metatron is breathing a huge sigh of relief here because he thinks he's confirmed Gabriel didn't give Aziraphael anything, the last thing he needs to do is separate the really good question asker from his will to ask any more good questions.

"But how does the metatron know Gabriel didn't give him anything? What does he have like a stupid spy camera or something inside the bookshop?" Guys the art direction in this show in bonkers, I'm telling you.

OH LOOK. A WHITE GIANT FLOATING HEAD IN ALL THEIR CONVERSATIONS IN THE BOOKSHOP.

So my reading of the original line is something like : "Crowley wanted to not follow heaven, which caused him to fall with the guys. But also I've been watching him do reckless and annoying question asking right now. And that's currently ruining my plans and I've had enough. Get that idiot away from the bookshop."

#ineffable husbands #crowley #neil gaiman #crowley x aziraphale #good omens s2 #go2 #go2 meta #good omens meta #good omens season two #metatron #art director talks good omens #good omens spoilers #good omens gabriel

[booasaur]

Have you seen this french soa "Ici tout commence" ? There's a wlw story going on that's pretty nice! Lots of tropes ! (strangers -> bestfriends -> lovers, the socially anxious introverted x popular extroverted mean girl, fake dating....) If anyone wants to watch their story, you can ask to follow @itsoiise on twitter they have the videos with eng subtitles :) I hope you have a great day !

Hi, yeah, as I briefly mentioned the other day, I am watching it, but still pretty behind.

Instead of just watching a cut of the ship's scenes, I downloaded all the eps from this current season and the provided French closed captioning, and then machine translated those to get English subtitles that mooostly work. Then I just started watching from the first ep.

As usual with soaps, even though I'm usually jumping in for just the ship and will often skim to their parts, I like to know the full context and do eventually get sucked into the rest of the stories, so at this point I've finished Teyssier's flareup, the Lionel/Kelly/Mailk/Ambre love square, just completed the David abuse story, and am now fully entering the Carla pregnancy arc. That's in November, so I still have about three more months to catch up to.

I'm surprised you mentioned fake dating for Carla and Berenice too, since she's right now in the middle of fake dating Souleymane! But please don't give me any other spoilers, I know that currently, as in right now in February, there's a lot going on with them but I've blacklisted everything so I'm actually staying pretty spoiler-free, except knowing there is activity, or at least there was on Berenice's side, that's about how much I picked up when this first popped up on my radar.

But anyway, so I love them already! Their friendship really is a perfect mix of opposites attract, like you said, the confident mean girl and the socially anxious introvert, but like any great relationship, that's just a fraction of their dynamic.

Carla being so outgoing and without any respect for boundaries that she quickly bulldozed through Berenice's, who would have never reached out first, while Berenice being so quiet is what made Carla unthreatened enough to seek her out and let her in, that's how their differences put them together but what's kept them together are all their similarities. Berenice's no doormat and her light sarcasm and humor and willingness to call Carla out are actually what make Carla really like her, and it's Carla's very occasional kindness (mostly drawn out by and for Berenice) that made her reassure Berenice at the very start and convince her to stay.

Each makes the other a better person; Carla pushes Berenice to be more outgoing and not stuck in her head or her screens so much while Berenice pushes Carla to be nicer and fairer to everyone. If they weren't already a ship I'd be shipping them!

Most of all, they genuinely like each other! It's funny that individually they're both the type to be isolated from the rest of the school, Carla too spoiled and snobby, Berenice too withdrawn, but they get along perfectly. All the contrasting and complementary parts of their personalities makes them always happy to just hang out with each other, on the same wavelength but never boring and predictable. They're just so playful and at ease and comfortable with each other, it's wonderful. :)

#replies #femslash related stuff #Anonymous #sent on 20240131 #5 #ici tout commence #carlice #that's the ship name? #the second half...

[gamerwoman3d]

Welp. It's been fun but I gotta go to horny jail for about the next thousand years or so. Holy fuck.

[Spicy/Explicit AND gifs AND gore under the cut 🔞]

Original video:

[And not to brag but yes I did get a flawless victory over him in that ridiculous Seasonal Tower in Invasions mode. Watch the whole thing if you want to find out how.]

Okay. It is horny hours.

They objectified the fuck outta this man in this fatality and honestly? Kudos.

This hit me in all the kinks at once. No trigger warnings past this point read at your own risk

On screen, the whole thing about Shang Tsung pouring pain-inducing liquid on Sub-Zero's chest reads like hot wax. It reads like overstimulation and forced climax. Omg his hips... the way Shang Tsung watches/monitors him almost gives the viewer permission and encouragement to do the same. It's as if Shang Tsung is telling us "I'm enjoying watching this man writhe and spurt and lose his mind. I'm enjoying it immensely, actually. There's no reason not to do so."

We get so many of Sub-Zero's expressions. That's the more intimate part - the part most often censored in any kind of porn is the man's face, as if it's illegal for them to display any kind of expressions. As if they might accidentally leak proof of an actual emotion, it is too taboo even in the realm of porn to show the guy's face. That's what makes this particular piece of art-violence unique: it's usually a woman cringing in fear and pain and dread at the brink of being devoured by a monster that is simultaneously a vagina dentata and also phallic. [See: Ripley, Aliens.]

So we get to see his face in part pain, part fear, part on the brink of death, all the way through a symbolic climax, until literally he's getting his mind blown. And it's kinda amazing.

As for the other kinks this scene is reminiscent of, I'm personally not a big fan of being tied down but exceptions can be made - I'm into it if he is. There's the dom/sub[-zero hah] element of Shang Tsung having autonomy while Sub-Zero can only watch and pray [he kinda mouths 'oh my god' - right? if you read lips, lmk]. Not into the power imbalance part but Shang Tsung's enjoyment of the situation itself is also kinda arousing.

The final bit is the blood/birth stuff. Skipping the mpreg stuff [Barbara Creed has all this covered in The Monstrous Femme, check it out from a library], the blood stuff is... well its a kink for some. For me there's only one week a month where seeing blood on his nose is acceptable 😝

And yea I'd still sit there if the enthusiasm was mutual. Damn snake beat me to it this time tho.

#mortal kombat #mk1 #mortal kombat 1 #sub zero #bi han #mk sub zero #mk shang tsung #Shang Tsung #bihan #subzero #sub zero mk1 #sub zero bi han #sub-zero #First of all #yikes. Secondly this is every scrap of Barbara Creed's arguments of the Monstrous Feminine rolled into one single fatality #like a loaded objectification burrito. Third #I've never seen all this horror executed on an objectified male form so perfectly #and major kudos to NRS on that one. Yes it's an Alien/Ripley reference throughout and I can write a whole paper on the similarities. #but more importantly hooollyy fuuuu do you see his hips #Symbolically though the spiky snake thing is both phallic [the last shot of it still standing out of his torso makes it even more phallic] #and it is also a vagina dentata symbol. And it sitting on his face like that had some dual meanings. One of which was someone at nrs may #have wanted to tie him down and sit on his face [thanks for your hard work nrs worker] and the other being the trope of “dick on the brain.

[theerurishipper]

I'm still so disappointed how season 4 handled Ladynoir and just settled it on "Ladybug owes Chat nothing and can't be asked to uphold basic respect when it doesn't benefit her or she just doesn't want to"

Like Wishmaker. There was no reason for the show to "settle" the problem of how badly Adrien's home life affects him in this particular akuma and makes him extra vulnerable by going "Chat has to learn that his life doesn't matter in akumas". The akuma very obviously hit home for him and he was also open to her about how much him not remembering any childhood dream bothers him but all the show episode did was having Ladybug go "I bet you just forgot, it doesn't matter because I said so <3 now go and stay all alone in hand-to-hand combat with the akuma since I decided that u have no problems in your life <3"

The entire season the excuse is either "Ladybug is the leader not his nanny" or "he's not telling her it's bothering him!" but here we had an episode where all Marinette had to do was for once listen to what he's saying and not just tell Chat Noir his problem doesn't exist and he has to just stop behaving like there is one because she doesn't like the thought of Chat having a life at all apparently.

I see no purpose in sugarcoating it. That was shit leadership once again only concerned about what she wants and then abandoning Chat on the battle field, after just telling him his problem doesn't exist and for her the topic is over. It's so frustrating that the show never ever went back to fixing that. It's just settled as her being flawless because she smiled and him being awful and having to learn the lesson to never ever bother Ladybug again with his life.

Those are just awful messages for leadership and partnership. Marinette doesn't need to know that Chat has an abusive home life to just listen for once in this damn partnership. He was more than open about how much it was bothering him, she was just written to disregard him anyway bc "she doesn't know"

Well, she certainly never tried listening either or acting like Chat exists at all as a civilian person the moment it requires effort or adjustments not being made for HER comfort.

How hard it is to not have Ladybug disregard everything about Chat Noir all the time and not have the show then claim it's GOOD FEMINIST leadership and can't be criticized bc girl?

You're so right anon. Honestly, I didn't actually mind Wishmaker on its own all too much. You know, it's understandable that Ladybug wouldn't be able to pick up on the fact that Chat Noir is being really vulnerable right now, and she's just trying to tease him/banter with him. For that reason, I didn't think too much of that scene before. I was very slightly uneasy about the way she just did not listen to him and take his concerns seriously, but I really did think it was unfair to blame her for not being able to pick up on his insecurities and to blame her for not being able to immediately offer him support. And I still do think that, but only to a little extent. Way, way less than when I first watched the episode.

Because I watched her unintentionally make light of Adrien's struggle in hopes that the show would, at some point in the future, have her actually understand and support him in a meaningful way. I felt like judging her based on this one scene where it's quite understandable that she wasn't able to support him the way he needs wasn't reasonable. But after the bullshit of the Season 5 finale, I've since become a lot less charitable to that scene. Because that scene doesn't seem like it was meant to show us that Ladybug didn't understand Chat Noir and that she would soon like I had originally assumed. That's literally just their whole dynamic now. Episodes like Kuro Neko which had Adrien learn not to inconvenience Ladybug with his emotions retroactively make that scene in Wishmaker seem bad. Because it pretty much confirms that all Adrien can ever expect in terms of emotional support from Ladybug is a few quips about him overreacting and another round of her not truly trying to listen to him, i.e., what happened in Wishmaker.

And I get that Adrien isn't open about his struggles. I do get that it is unfair to expect Marinette to instantly know exactly what he's going through if he doesn't vocalize it. But the fact remains that a part of the reason he isn't communicating with her is because she really has become more unapproachable. She's flipping out, she's having others outside of their duo learn things he doesn't get to know... doesn't paint a picture of someone who he might want to share his struggles with.

And honestly, she doesn't consider him much at all, not if it inconveniences her. All these elaborate plans to protect herself from Shadow Moth, and not a thought spared to Chat Noir. A whole plan to trick him into revealing his identity, not a thought spared to Chat Noir. All the secrets and lies, not a thought spared to Chat Noir. I get it, she's stressed and tired and traumatized, and I sympathize, but it's still poor leadership. Like, the entire end to the Ladynoir conflict of Season 4 happened by Adrien learning that he shouldn't bother her by asking for help and that he's not allowed to do so.

Honestly, he does so much emotional labor for her, and she barely returns the favor. If he has an issue, it's an inconvenience for her. It's so unequal at this point, and Season 5 only made it worse. Whenever Adrien needs something in the way of emotional support from Marinette, she is never made to give it to him. For a damning example, we spend Destruction, the episode where Adrien is so horrified about Cataclysming Monarch dealing with how awful Marinette feels about that having happened. She is never available to support him the way he does for her. He's just left to deal with his issues on his own, and if something goes wrong, then fuck him I guess, because Ladybug doesn't deserve to be inconvenienced by considering the safety and well-being of her supposed partner.

I'm sorry if this seems too harsh. I'm sorry if this seems like I'm being too nitpicky or too critical. At some point, I probably would have said this was too harsh too. But damn it, they really just went ahead and said that Adrien doesn't matter, and I have a lot of thoughts on that, none of which are good.

Thank you for your ask!

#MLB #Miraculous Ladybug #Adrien Agreste #Marinette Dupain Cheng #Ladybug #Chat Noir #ML Salt #ML Writing Salt #ML Writers Salt #Marinette Salt #Ladybug Salt #Meta #My meta #Asks #Ladynoir conflict

[harringtonstilinski]

Sports Knowledge - Stiles Stilinski

Author: @harringtonstilinski Characters: Stiles Stilinski x Emma Thomas Word Count: 1,276 Warnings: fluff, set in summer 2012, Smut: no | yes; Requested: Yes. This is so short, I'm so sorry!! 😩 But, I hope this meets your expectations, @fandom-princess-forevermore A/N: Hi, friends! We have - 🥁 🥁 🥁 - A STEMMA FIC fic!! I miss them, hahaa. We're gonna stick this in between seasons 2 & 3! I hope you like this! If you do, please do not hesitate to reblog and give some feedback, whether it be in the reblogs, comments, or my inbox. As always, read at your own risk and enjoy 😊

“You’re wrong.”

“How am I wrong? I know more about this team than you do.”

“Fine. How many World Series have they won?”

“Two. Next.” I looked at Stiles, taking a bite of my sub sandwich. 

I could tell that Stiles was thinking about his next question for a moment before giving me an opened mouth smile. “Best player-” I went to interrupt him, but he cut me off with the rest of his question. “-ever.”

Taking a deep breath, I thought about it before asking, “Personal preference or statistically?”

“Let’s go statistically,” he smiled, popping a chip into his mouth.

Sighing, I had to wrack my brain for the answer, looking dead into Stiles’ eyes. “Is it…-” I looked down at the table, my eyes dancing around as I muttered, “Fuck, I know this.” Looking back up at him, I asked, “Is it… Tom Seaver?”

Stiles’ eyes almost shot out of their sockets with how wide they went. “Holy shit, that’s right?” Looking under the table, he asked, “You got your phone out or something?” When he brought his head back up, he looked at me as I laughed, my hand over my mouth.

“No,” I said, trying to control my laughter.

“Well, then how did you know that?”

I couldn’t help the scream that came out, my hand still covering my mouth as I laughed. “Because you told me!”

Leaning closer to the table as I snorted, Stiles whispered, “You’re making a scene. Calm down.”

“I’m trying,” I laughed, wiping at my eyes. Taking deep breaths, I still had a smile on my face. Hearing snickers had my attention turning a few of the lacrosse players that were on the team with Scott and Stiles.

“Who’s the best lacrosse player on the team?” I asked, a little too loudly.

Confused, Stiles turned to see who or what I was looking at; seeing Joey Anderson and their goons from the team. He turned back to look at me, seeing the rage in my eyes that I was sure was there. Casting his eyes down to look at his food, he sighed, “Let it go, Em.”

“How the hell can I let it go?” I asked. “They almost cost me my spot on the team.” I looked at Stiles as his head snapped back up to look at me.

“You’re the coach’s niece,” he deadpanned. “You’re not gonna lose your job.”

I sighed, sitting back in my chair, playing with the straw in my cup. When I looked at him, he was resting his chin in his hand, a small soft smile on his face. “What?”

Stiles shook his head, looking down while crossing his arms across the table, leaning on them. “You’re just… so beautiful.”

“Uh-huh,” I said, trying not to smile as I looked out the window. When I side eyed him, I couldn’t help the smile that formed on my lips as he said, “You’re so pretty.” I raised a brow at him, his smile ever present on his face.

“You’re beau-,” Stiles said, but was interrupted by Joey and his goons.

“Hey, Stilinski!” Joey said. “You trying to fit in now or what?” Stiles stiffened, Joey’s words getting to him. He was growing his hair out and I was loving it. His hair had the smallest of spikes to it; baby spikes, if you will. I was sad when I woke up one morning and his baby face was all but gone. His new hair makes up for it.

“Hey, Anderson,” I said, standing from my seat. I started walking over towards his table, but Stiles’ hand in mine stopped me. “How about you - I don’t know - go home and spend time with Mary Palmer and her five sisters while watching your favorite porno site since, ya’know, you can’t get any.” I didn’t wait for a reply as I turned and grabbed my stuff, food included, and walked out of the restaurant to Stiles’ Jeep.

Feeling Stiles’ body next to mine, I looked up at him, sheepishly. “I can’t open the door.”

“Why not?” he asked, confused

Holding my hands up, I showed him the items in my hands; my phone, drink and bag that I had put my sandwich back in after wrapping it. “My hands are full.”

He sighed, exasperatedly before moving to open the door for me. I knew he would anyway. He’d been doing it since Noah taught him how to drive this hunk of junk.

“You’re lucky you’re cute,” he muttered, walking away from me. 

I chuckled and got into my seat, setting my sandwich bag on the floor by my feet, taking a sip of my drink as Stiles got into the driver seat, starting up the Jeep. He stopped all movement as I looked over at him. “What’s up, babe?”

Stiles looked over at me, looking into my eyes for a second before softly smiling. Shaking his head, he said, “Nothing.”

With a fake sad face, I looked at him and asked, “Is it because I was starting to kick your ass in sports knowledge?”

He chuckled, backing out of our parking spots to head to our next destination. “No. And we barely even got started before Anderson distracted you.”

“Eh, he’s just mad I won’t spread my legs for him. He’s also a dick. Like, the biggest. I mean, his stats on the team aren’t that great. He’s barely even on the field, his stats are not great, and he’s just a fucking tool.” I was silent for a moment while I thought my words over, my eyebrows scrunching in finality. “Ya’know what? Fuck him. He’s not even worth my time.”

Looking over at Stiles, I asked, “Ya’know what is worth my time?”

“What?” he asked with a chuckle, that smirk I loved so much on him showing up.

“Kicking your ass in sports knowledge.” 

When he spared a glance at me, I smiled big.

“Okay, sassypants,” he said. “Give me the top 5 Mets players on the team right now.”

Without missing a beat, I answered, “In no specific order; David Wright, Matt Harvey, Jon Niese, R.A. Dickey, Ruben Tejada.” I looked over at Stiles, straw between my teeth as I watched the blush on his cheeks rise up. Trying to hide the smile that was forming, I asked him, “Are you blushing?”

In that Stiles way that I loved about him, - no, we haven’t said those words yet - he started to get even more flustered, as he looked between me and the road. “Bl-blushing?” He scoffed, trying to act all cool and shit. “Pshh. I don’t blush.”

With the most deadpan expression I could muster, I replied, “You do and you are.”

“N… no.”

“Stiles.”

“Okay, fine,” he breathed. Looking over at me, I saw the hint of a smile on his lips. “It’s hot, okay. You knowing all this stuff about the Mets.”

Reaching over to card my finger through the hair at the nape of his neck, I smiled and replied, “Well, I have the best teacher.”

That hint of a smile on his face grew into that fucking smirk that could make my panties drop. Opening my mouth to say those three words, I stopped myself, instead bringing my hand from his hair to his hand, lacing our fingers together.

Beating me to the punch, Stiles brought my knuckles to his mouth, placing soft kisses to each one. “What do you say to us going home, grabbing my laptop and marathoning Back to the Future while we finish our subs.”

I smiled so big, my cheeks were sure to hurt within the next five seconds. “I’d love that.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N 2:  hi, friends! gif is supposed to be stiles all flustered and shit. let me know what you thought about! again, please do not hesitate to reblog and give some feedback, whether it be in the reblogs, comments, or my inbox.

Additional Notes: i hate that this is so freaking short.. i'm off my stiles game, lol. also, if the world series thing at the beginning is wrong, pls excuse the error! my research might've been wrong..

~~~

Forever / Everything Taglist: @stiles-o-dylan24 @stixnstripesworld @fandom-princess-forevermore @quanticobae @mischiefandi @kellyashcroft @lauren-novak​

If you’re tagged and didn’t want to be, please let me know.

Italics wouldn’t let me tag!

~~~

*Please don’t post my writing anywhere else without my consent. The author of this work will always and forever be @harringtonstilinski.

All characters, story lines, and plot aside from y/n and her storyline & plot, are all of the work of Jeff Davis.

*These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited.

No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher.

Posted on February 29, 2024

#stiles stilinski #stiles stilinski x reader #dylan o'brien x reader #stiles x reader #dylan x reader #harringtonstilinski #stiles stilinski x emma thomas #stiles x emma #stiles x emma grace

[frazzledsoul]

The thing about S6 Jess Mariano is that there is simultaneously too much of him and not enough.

I've been watching old episodes recently because of a story I've been writing on and off for a week, and I don't think people truly appreciate the amount of set-up that went into Jess's scenes in The Real Paul Anka. In this show, there are supporting cast members who almost never get scenes of their own outside of interacting with the girls and various townies. I think Paris has exactly one scene that doesn't involve Lorelai or Rory. Dean has a handful. Sookie has just one off the top of my head. I believe Logan has one as well. All of these people were on the show far, far longer than Jess was. It seems only Luke, Lane, and Jess have a lot of scenes with characters other than Lorelai and Rory...and in season 6, Jess has not been seen for two years and has not been a main cast member for three. We get an introduction to his place of work, he has interactions ALONE (!) with his friends/coworkers, we get an extended sequence where he explains to Luke how exactly his job works and where he lives, he has significant interactions with both Luke, April, and Rory, and closes out the last we see of his relationship with Luke in the OS on a good note. None of the other love interests get this, because while we spend more time with them, they are not developed as individuals outside of Rory. Dean is the good boyfriend who unexpectedly leads Rory into an affair and who we last see chafing at her desire to leave him behind, while Logan is the rich, dangerous boyfriend who entices Rory into the elitist world that Lorelai sought to escape from and who will eventually lead her astray because he is unable to escape from his father's expectations, forcing Rory to repeat the life patterns of her mother (God, I hate the AYITL ending. It blows). Jess is his own person, whose existence is not completely defined by Rory, but who eventually inspires her to seek out the path that she wants by virtue of his own example. And at the end of the story, he is the one door left open, the one person who is working with her on her goals and is still involved with her life.

(This is why I chafe when people say Jess wasn't endgame, even after all of these years. One of the last things ASP said about a follow-up is that she was going to chase Milo and Alexis down and make them do it. Her intentions were pretty obvious, even for those of us like me who don't necessarily hate Logan).

What's so great about S6 Jess is that almost all of the stuff that made him a terrible boyfriend and such a damaged, tortured character during his original run on the show has been smoothed over. He meets Rory on her terms and makes plans at her convenience: he acknowledges her discomfort: he is far more concerned with her than busting the chops of her boyfriend (although that part is clearly fun, too). He's considerate, social, a person who makes plans and follows up on them. He's confident yet self-effacing: when Rory is found to be using him, he reminds her of the boundary she's crossed yet doesn't lash out. It doesn't change his feelings overall: she isn't choosing him at the time being, but he still cares about her. Even though we leave him with a broken heart, we know he's got a life beyond her, something he didn't have when we last saw him in season 3 and season 4. He has friends, a purpose, a respected place in his community: he will be okay. It's a better place than we leave Dean and likely a better place than we leave Logan in AYITL. He will be okay.

I'm of the mind that Jess's participation in the last season of the OS has less to do with the writing team changing (although I don't think Milo was particularly keen on working with the new guys, either) and more to do with what else Milo was working on at the time. Heroes was a huge, huge deal when it first came out and networks aren't always amenable to lending out their actors to work for their competitors. I just don't think it was possible for Jess to show up no matter who was writing that season. I do occasionally wonder what the S7 writers would have done with him. It doesn't escape my scrutiny that the show skips the actual Christmas holiday because Rory was in London, because Jess almost certainly would have traveled to Stars Hollow to visit his mom and newborn sister and comfort his depressed uncle. There certainly were a lot of uses for him that had nothing to do with Rory.

AYITL Jess is of course more or less the same, only with bigger arm muscles and some of the edges smoothed out: the main difference is that we see he's been more or less accepted into the Gilmore/Danes clan and is a more active support system for Luke and his mother.

At this late stage in the game, I'm not expecting or wanting a follow-up and I think odds are very much against there ever being one. I do wish that knowing that AYITL was all there was that they had given us more time with Jess (if possible) and that there was some sort of definitive end for him and Rory instead of the door just being swung wide open and an indication of a future (and of course, Jess being a total dreamboat). However, as with all things ASP, you take what you can get and what was given to us here wasn't that bad.

Those last four words still suck, though.

#meta #gilmore girls #jess mariano #literati

[sirfrogsworth]

Review of Blue Eye Samurai on Netflix

There are some spoiler-ish things below, but I think most of it is in the trailer, so I don't think I will ruin anything. I'll warn you during the most spoilery section, though the show makes the "twist" pretty obvious from the beginning.

Premise

Blue Eye Samurai is a Kill Bill-style revenge tale that takes place in 17th century Japan. The samurai is half white/half Japanese. The show states that no white folks were allowed in the country back then, so the samurai tries to conceal blue eyes with some sweet BluBlocker™ orange glasses. The Samurai is displeased to have white heritage and decides to try and kill all the "white devils" hiding in Japan.

Will some reactionaries complain there is a show all about someone trying to murder white people? I have no idea. But they're all bad white people, so I'm hoping it won't become a thing.

My Hot Takes

A few episodes meandered a bit, but I enjoyed the series as a whole quite a bit. If nothing else, the sword fights were epic and bloody. I would have watched it for that alone. And there is some gorgeous art direction where they really take advantage of the 2D styled, 3D animation. Plus, Japan is just really pretty. There is also a puppet show that was brilliantly mixed in with the story and the way they animated it was next level awesome.

They fell into cliche a few times. I think they were trying to do homages and tributes but ended up in Derivative Land and some of them felt a bit cringe.

They used "Battle Without Honor Or Humanity" which is that rousing instrumental song from Kill Bill and it was way too on the nose. Like, yes, this show is obviously a 1600s version of Kill Bill, but you're not supposed to make it that obvious.

Also, there was a Metallica song that equally made me roll my eyes and think, "That is badass" so I give them a pass on that one.

And there were a few sections where it felt like you were watching someone else play a video game. I don't know how else to describe it. As if the narrative melted away and suddenly a bunch of Prince of Persia obstacles appeared.

That said, the story was enjoyable, the actors were great, the characters were interesting, the animation was solid, and the fight choreography was top notch.

The nice thing about animation is you don't have to do any jump cuts during the action, so you get to really *see* the fights develop. Thankfully they didn't make use of a lot of impossible-in-real-life camera moves, so it all felt very grounded. As if these fights could actually be filmed in live-action. I suspect they may have even used motion capture or closely adhered to reference footage. Most of the non-fantastical choreography felt like something a stunt performer could actually do. They even had some legit Japanese samurai-style sword fighting moves before it got to the "John Wick with a katana" part of the show.

Back in the day, samurai duels were more akin to jousting than fencing and usually only lasted one or two moves. It can be pretty exciting as long as you build tension and anticipation. But if every sword fight in the show was like that, it would probably get boring. But it was still nice to see it toward the beginning.

So the quality was a bit roller coaster-y at times, but I think it was a solid first season. And I am really hopeful they get a chance to smooth things out in a second. But it is Netflix, soooooo...

As far as content warnings, there is a lot of blood and sex and nudity. Women are very subjegated and some of those depictions are rough. There are some brutal torture scenes. And I think there is implied rape, but it isn't made super clear.

The nudity was surprisingly balanced which felt refreshing. So get ready for boobies and floppy cartoon peens. All the genitals get screen time.

Quick aside about erotic scenes...

There has been recent discourse about nudity and sexy time in media. My biggest issue has always been that men's bodies are rarely shown aside from the patoot. It is never balanced and I always felt uncomfortable with that arrangement. I know movies are a bit stuck because the MPAA has decided dicks in a sexual context are an automatic NC-17. But even in newer HBO-type content where they do show penises, they are usually prosthetics. Hyper real fake dicks on top of real dicks that probably cost tens of thousands of dollars to develop and apply.

Like, the folks with boobs don't get expensive prosthetics. Only the most famous actresses can opt for a body double. For years, if an actress wasn't willing to get naked they would just say, "Well, I guess we'll just have to find another actress."

And now if a guy doesn't want to get naked, apparently the response is, "Don't worry, we'll raise Stan Winston from the dead so he can make you a perfect megadick."

Women are usually asked to do the brunt of the nudity and I have long felt that wasn't fair and it was exploitative whether intentional or not.

I just think if you are going to ask actors to be vulnerable, everyone should do it or no one should do it.

I also think we need to see more normal non-porn genitals. Like, you can't brag about your progressive all-inclusive nudity if you slap a giant fake wang on every time.

/end tangent

And now, the spoilery part...

The big twist, which is really only a big twist for a character in the show and not the audience, is that the Blue Eye Samurai was born a girl. To avoid capture and death they essentially hid in a different gender identity. And I'm trying to decide if this is a trans story or not.

Sometimes it felt like the show was bluntly saying, "She's a girl. See, she has boobs and no penis. And we make a big deal about her getting caught naked. It's like Mulan!"

But then the show kinda/sorta implies that while identifying as a man was a tactic at first, the Blue Eye Samurai came to feel much more comfortable as a man most of the time and only revealed their feminine attributes to a select few. They also had a binding scene which felt like intentional trans imagery.

Since there wasn't the same concept of trans-ness in 1600s Japan as we understand it in modern times, I'm having trouble determining if this is just an homage to Mulan that wasn't thought very deeply about, or if this is allegory exploring a trans identity.

It is unclear if the identity was chosen purely out of necessity or if there was more to it.

Was it like... they tried on a coat because it was cold, but then they really liked how it fit and made it an essential part of their wardrobe?

Or was it just pure pragmatism? If they don't wear the coat they will die from exposure.

I'm worried they wanted to stay close to that line where they could say it wasn't a trans story if that ended up being more convenient. I don't know. I'm fine with allegory and I really enjoyed how they did it with Nimona, but this felt more deliberately ambiguous and it frustrated me a bit. It would be nice if we could just have blatant trans stories that didn't need to hide in ambiguity to avoid controversy. But maybe there were more obvious things I missed and my confusion is unwarranted.

I also think an argument could be made for ol' Blue Eye being genderfluid. Actually genderfluid would make a lot of sense. Their masculine side is the stoic warrior and their feminine side is their vulnerability, love, and humanity—reserved only for those most trusted. And when the two blend and they are a warrior woman they get super horny. So the entire spectrum is there.

I'm sure there will be a long complicated video essay analyzing this gender dynamic.

/end of spoilery section

In any case, I think if you liked Kill Bill, this might be a show that interests you. It has much less cultural appropriation and blatant stereotyping. No Pussy Wagon, but there is a cool horse. And they did use an all East Asian voice cast, so that representation was cool. And the co-showrunner was Japanese, and I think that influence definitely made a difference.

I give Blue Eye Samurai 7.5 Froggies out of 10.

#long post #blue eye samurai spoilers

[d1xonss]

Desert Rose

Chapter 35 ~ Hey Jude

✧ Pairing : Daryl Dixon x Rose

✧ Era : Season 3

✧ Word Count : 5.9k

In this chapter ~ Rose was left utterly heartbroken at the loss of the man she loved dearly, growing almost unphased and numb as they made their way back to the prison without him. A new and unexpected group of people are there when they returned however, just wanting a chance and someone else to survive alongside of. Though Rick didn't look like he was willing to hear them out whatsoever. But one thing he did want was to seek Rose out, wanting to patch up everything that had happened between them.

The car ride home was nothing but awful. Rick was the one who drove the woman and I back while Glenn and Maggie followed behind in a separate car we had hotwired. After Glenn and I finally broke away from each other, no one uttered a single word as we packed up and left. It was a very awkward and uncomfortable silence that filled our car, but to be honest I didn't really care. All I could think about was Daryl, how it all happened too fast, and to say I was heartbroken would be an understatement.

I quickly noticed how empty I felt without him, and I caught myself multiple times trying to glance towards the backseat expecting him to be there. But he wasn't, he was gone. I began to overthink that maybe I had made a mistake, maybe I should've gone with him. But I quickly shook my head at the thought the moment I let my mind wander there. I would've been just as heartbroken to leave the others as I was for him, and I needed to stick with the decisions I made, deal with the consequences.

Suddenly I felt Rick slow the car down to a stop, causing my eyes to glance up out of the windshield to see a truck in the middle of the road that was blocking our way of getting through. I just sighed to myself but yet made no effort to move.

I felt Rick place a hand on my shoulder, "You coming out?" he asked, his tone almost softer than it usually was.

But I silently shook my head and looked back in front of me as I felt him remove his hand, hearing his door open and shut seconds after. I watched absentmindedly as they made their way over to the truck, pausing for a moment before Glenn reached to open the driver's side door. Though the moment he did, a walker made itself known as it flew out of the vehicle in attempts to attack. But it didn't get the chance as Glenn quickly stomped on its skull repeatedly, but continued even after it was dead, taking out all his anger on the one thing he could find. I cringed and stopped watching the scene in front of me, looking back down at my hands.

"I'm sorry about Daryl."

My head tilted back a bit to look at the woman behind me, just silently nodding in thanks. I was surprised she said anything to me at all, but it somehow meant a lot that she did. Though I was quick to realize I still hadn't learned her name as she never so much as breathed it. I wanted to know it. But what I really wanted even more was to change the subject, even if she was only trying to be respectful.

"You never told us your name." I stated.

"I know." she said simply.

I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped my lips as I saw her smirking at me, "Well, can I know your name?" I asked.

She paused for a minute as she looked at me, before finally saying, "Michonne."

"That's really pretty." I smiled, turning back around to keep an eye on the rest of them, unaware of the small smile on Michonne's face at the compliment I just gave her.

Glenn and Rick's voices were muffled from inside the car, though it didn't take a genius to see that they were arguing from their pointed fingers and furrowed brows. I couldn't help but roll my eyes, debating in my head whether or not I should step in so we could move this along. But the second I saw Rick getting up closer in Glenn's face, I cursed under my breath and opened up the car door to get out.

"What the hell did you expect me to do?! Throw down a welcome mat for Merle?!" Rick yelled, "This is the hand we've been dealt!"

"Hey!" I yelled to get their attention, watching all their heads snap towards me as everything around us seemed to still, "What the fuck is going on?"

There was a moment of awkward silence, Rick stepping away from Glenn as they both breathed a bit heavier from the screaming match, "Nothing." he muttered.

I narrowed my eyes at him, "I'm not five, you don't have to stop talking about him just because I'm around. Now stop your arguing, move this fucking truck, so we can get back to the fucking prison!" I snapped.

I didn't wait for their response as I stormed back towards the car, getting in and shutting the door behind me with a slam. Breathing in and out deeply, I attempted to calm myself down as I rested my head back further on the seat and closing my eyes for a moment. Knowing in the back of my mind that all I really needed was some sleep.

Michonne scoffed, "Men." she muttered.

I huffed out a laugh as I briefly turned around to face her again, "Yeah, men."

She smiled a first genuine smile at me, before I turned back around and rested my head on the cool glass of the window. After the harsh words I seemed to spit at them to hurry up, they seemed to get the message. It felt like only a minute or two before I heard Rick get back in the car with a slam of his own door, muttering something bitchy under his breath.

But I couldn't bring myself to listen as I stayed perfectly still where I sat, watching the vehicle begin to move down the road again as the path was completely cleared. My eyelids grew heavier as I listened to the soft hum of the car, the sound alone coaxing me to fall deeper as I finally allowed my eyes to close.

Although it felt like I merely blinked before I felt someone's hand on my shoulder, gently shaking me awake again. I opened my eyes again and glanced back to see Michonne as she pointed up ahead towards the prison, silently waking me to show we were already back. I gave her a small smile in thanks and quickly sat up in my seat as I saw we were just about to pull up further to enter the gates.

Carl and Carol were up by the front, waiting anxiously for our return before big smiles were brought to their faces, quickly opening up the entrance for us the second they saw the cars. Rick pulled the vehicle far enough into the space, before quickly putting it in park and getting out to scoop Carl up in a hug.

I slowly got out after him, shutting the door behind me just in time to see Carl pull away from Rick and make a beeline towards me as he instantly wrapped his arms around my waist. I felt myself smile a little as I gave him a tight squeeze, moving his hat to place a quick kiss the top of his head.

"You're okay?" he asked as he finally pulled away.

I nodded, "Trying to be."

He looked confused but before he could say anything, Carol spoke up, "Where's Daryl?" she asked, looking towards me.

My smile instantly dropped as I tried to figure out where to even begin, but once she saw my hesitance, she thought the worst. Her eyes got wide as she stepped closer to me, "Oh sweetie." she breathed in obvious sympathy as she tried to bring me into a hug.

But I stepped back a bit and shook my head, "He's not dead, just...just gone." I said.

She gave me a confused look but I wasn't planning to say anything else about it, "I'm going to drive this car up." I muttered, not waiting for a response as I hopped back in the driver's seat.

Putting the car back in drive, I looked up once more in the rearview mirror, seeing Rick breaking the news to Carol as Carl and Michonne stood off to the side. Though I tried not to look for too long, I still managed to catch a glimpse of the slight devastation on her face as they broke the news to her. I drove the rest of the way up the gravel road in complete silence, though my thoughts were very loud as I couldn't seem to stop thinking.

As I rolled through the other sets of gates, putting the car in park along in line with the others, I saw Glenn and Maggie reuniting with the rest of the Greene's. I felt my heart warm at the sight, getting out of the car and walking up to them slowly I watched as they all embraced each other, relief washing over Hershel's face at the feeling of them being home and unharmed.

Beth then spotted me after she hugged her sister, laughing lightly with tears in her eyes as she ran over to me. I gave her the best smile I could muster and quickly wrapped my arms around her gently.

"I'm so glad you're okay." she whispered.

I nodded, "I'm okay." I confirmed, squeezing her shoulders a bit tighter.

She held onto me for longer than I expected her too, almost sensing something was off in a way. I had no idea how she was able to tell when the others hadn't come up to break the news, but she did. She could read me in a way I couldn't understand.

But I eventually broke away from her as I saw Hershel still standing there over her shoulder, moving over to greet him as well. He hugged me as best as he could as he balanced on the crutches, silently thanking me for everything and I only nodded in return. Not having the right thing to say. Though I quickly managed to move on and finally head back into the prison after greeting them, itching to just go off by myself so I could finally be alone after the extremely emotional day. The last thing I wanted was for anyone else to see me break.

The heavy door opened and shut loudly behind me, leaving me rushing past the common room to head to my cell to finally get some sleep in my own bed. But as I walked by, some unfamiliar figures were sitting down at one of the tables casually, making me  immediately pause and backtrack a few steps as I didn't recognize them at all.

My eyes were somewhat wide as I stared at them for a long moment, seeing Carl walk in a few seconds later and stepping past the complete strangers as if it was totally natural that they were there. I grabbed his arm to stop him as I gestured up to the people a few feet away.

"I'm sorry, who the hell is this?" I asked him.

One of the men in the group stood up from his seat, "Hi, uh...I'm Tyreese, and this is my sister Sasha," he said while pointing to a girl next to him, "And these are our friends Allen and Ben."

I shook my head at him, "What are you doing here?"

He paused, "Well...I was hoping you guys would give us a chance to be a part of your group. I would love to talk to you and-"

"It's not my call." I interrupted him, hearing the door open once more, knowing Rick was about to come in and give these people a run for their money the second he caught a glimpse of them just as I did.

I scoffed, knowing exactly how this was going to go, "Good luck." I said sarcastically before turning on my heel and making my way back to the cellblock.

As my footsteps got more distant, I faintly heard Carl speaking to them quietly, "She just lost someone important to her, don't take it personal. She's really nice."

The sentence made me stop in my tracks. I closed my eyes and sighed heavily before shaking my head and continuing to make my way to my cell. As I slowly walked into the space, I couldn't help but stare at some of Daryl's things still sitting in one of the corners of the room, scattered and all over the place, yet somehow still neat. A part of me wanted to go through the things he left but I couldn't bring myself to do it, not yet at least.

My body practically tumbled onto the mattress in exhaustion, mentally and physically. Though I felt myself almost immediately shiver, wrapping the blanket tighter around myself to offer more warmth as I tried to get some more sleep. But I soon came to realize how much warmer it was with him in the bed next to me, how he was practically a furnace with the amount of heat that radiated off of him.

That single thought alone caused my mind to spiral again, thinking about the things I would no longer have now that he wasn't here. The things I would miss the most. How I would never feel the warmth of his hands on my skin, or never be in his embrace. But it wasn't all about that either. It was also about the loss of his laugh, his deep voice, even his eyes and how they could look at me any certain way and I would know exactly what he was thinking.

The familiar tears built up in the corners of my eyes now that I was alone, finally allowing myself to cry softly as I tried desperately to drift off to sleep.

My eyes peeled open as I heard the faint sound of a baby fussing near my cell, sitting up quickly as I tried to rack my brain for when I actually fell asleep. But I couldn't remember, the only thing my mind could process was the tears that still stained my cheeks, quickly wiping them as I looked up to see Beth slightly pacing just outside.

She shook a bottle in her hand as she walked back and forth down the line of cells, trying to calm the baby down as she prepared to feed her.

"I can feed her." I offered.

Her eyes snapped up to meet mine, nodding silently as she came into my room and sat down next to me on the bed. She passed the baby over to me along with the bottle, watching for a moment as I rocked her lightly and placed it in her mouth to finally calm her down.

"Didn't mean to wake you." she said apologetically.

I shook my head as I kept my eyes on the baby, "You didn't."

I could see her nod slowly out of the corner of my eye, before she grew quiet as she spaced off, clearly thinking deeply about something. For the most part I didn't acknowledge it as I watched the little girl's eyes get faintly heavy as she slowly drank, but after a few minutes it was getting hard to ignore.

As I went to say something, she actually opened her mouth first. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry...about Daryl." she finally muttered.

My eyes glanced up at her as I nodded in appreciation, "Thanks hon."

"I think it's bullshit, leaving us like that." she suddenly said quite bitterly, "Leaving you like that. I thought you would be more angry."

I sighed as I adjusted the baby in my arms, "I'm not angry. I understand why he left." I spoke.

She stayed silent as she stewed over that, contemplated about how I couldn't possibly be angry when he did such a selfish thing. But the truth was, it wasn't selfish at all. If I was being honest I almost believed that being angry with him would make things easier, if the things he did were truly selfish and ignorant. But that wasn't the case at all. He wasn't selfish, and I couldn't find the strength to be angry. Not after everything he said to me at the last few moments we shared.

"You know, he asked me to come with him." I went on when she didn't say anything.

A look of shock crossed her face, "Really?"

"Really."

"So...why didn't you-"

"Because I couldn't leave the rest of you. You all mean too much to me, and I just...couldn't." I explained.

She smiled, a twinge of sadness still present on her features, "I'm glad you didn't. I'd miss ya too much." she admitted while leaning her head on my shoulder.

"I'd miss you too." I told her, placing a kiss on her head, "And I'd miss this little nugget right here."

She laughed a little, "You know, Rick and Carl picked a name for her; Judith."

I glanced back down at the baby before nodding my head in confirmation, "It suits her."

She nodded in agreement, and I then asked her to tell me what happened here while we were gone to take my mind off of everything. She began to tell me a little bit more about Tyreese's group, and the more she spoke, the worse I felt for completely brushing him off earlier. I hadn't meant to initially; I just didn't trust any strangers we came across, not knowing what their true intentions were.

But the more she talked about them, the more they sounded like genuinely good people, although I knew they wouldn't stay. With the way Rick was right now, taking one hit after another, I wouldn't be surprised if he threatened them right off the bat.

A lull grew in the conversation as the two of us quieted down on instinct, hearing the others in the cellblock somewhat whispering with one another. We both wordlessly looked at each other before getting up at the same time to trail downstairs and see what was happening. The two of us briefly caught Rick talking about what went down at Woodbury, how he had captured Maggie and Glenn while one of his men shot Oscar dead in the streets. It was clear to almost everyone that the way he was talking, this fight was far from over.

As Beth and I made our presence known, she spoke when it grew silent, "So what now? Do you think The Governor will retaliate?"

"Yes." Maggie said with no hesitation.

"Let him try." Glenn spoke lowly.

Hershel nodded to himself before slowly making his way up to Rick, placing a hand on his shoulder, "We could use some reinforcements." he obviously hinted.

Rick debated in his head for a moment, before sighing to himself as he turned to make his way back out to the common room to talk to the new people. I quickly handed Judith back to Beth to follow him out there and see what he was going to say, keep an eye on him in case anything happened. I quietly advised her and Carl to stay in the cellblock as the others seemed to follow Rick's lead, not wanting them to be in the space in case things somehow turned sour. They both protested with hushed whispers but I gave them one look that made them shut their mouths instantly, before turning around to enter the common room.

Rick walked up to Tyreese and the man introduced himself, but Rick barely even gave him a chance to speak before already interrupting him. "How did you get in?" he asked him.

"Fire damage to the administrative part of the prison. Walls down." Tyreese told him.

"That side is completely overrun with walkers, how'd you get this far?" Rick asked.

The man ducked his head as he swallowed a bit thickly, "We didn't...we lost our friend Dona."

It all grew silent around the space as he admitted they lost someone they cared for, an awkwardness lingering in the air.

"They were lost in the tombs." Carl voice suddenly came from behind me.

I whipped around to see both him and Beth lingering towards the back sheepishly, rolling my eyes at the two as they couldn't listen for shit.

Rick seemed to look back at him just as I did, processing his words as he suddenly started to lose his patience, "...You brought them here?" he snapped loudly.

Everyone seemed to instinctively flinch at his loudness, that alone causing me to silently pull Carl closer to me and wrap an arm around the front of him. Rick wasn't in his right state of mind, that much was clear, and I didn't want him to lash out at anyone. But definitely not his own kid.

"He had no choice." Hershel softly defended, watching as Rick slowly nodded his head in somewhat of an understanding.

"...I'm sorry about your friend...we know what that's like." Rick murmured.

Tyreese nodded in appreciation before continuing, "Hershel said you could use some extra hands, and we're no strangers to hard work. We'll go out, get our own food, stay out of your hair. You got a problem with another group, we'll help with that too. Anything to contribute." he said positively.

I felt myself smile at Tyreese, he was a smooth talker that was for sure. Just from the little speech he just gave, I was willing to let them be a part of the group and they seemed like good people. They never gave us a reason not to trust them from what I've seen.

Rick however, was clearly not thinking the same as I. "No." he instantly declined.

"Rick." I protested to get his attention, but he ignored me completely.

"Please." Sasha begged, "It's like ten little Indians out there...it's just us now."

Rick looked at her for a moment before repeating, "No."

"Let's talk about this, we can't just keep-" Hershel tried.

"We've been through this. With Tomas, Andrew, look what happened." Rick said, wanting these people out.

Carol stepped in, "Axel and Oscar weren't like them."

"And where's Oscar now?" he snapped at her.

She backed away slightly at his outburst, turning towards the rest of us with slightly wide eyes. There was a thick tension in the air as he continued, "I can't be responsible." Rick concluded.

"You turn us out, you are responsible." Tyreese argued, yet kept his tone calm.

Hershel then approached the scene cautiously, placing a hand on Rick's shoulder and began whispering something to him that none of us could make out. My guess was he was trying to convince him to let these people stay and really working his old man charm. He always had a way with words and could get you to agree with him over practically anything. And this wasn't any different.

After Rick pulled away he looked to all of us, his eyes lingering on where Carl and I stood. He sighed in silent defeat as a small smile was brought to his face, leaving me convinced that he was going to agree, to give these people a chance. But then his eyes slowly drifted above us, beginning to stare at the balcony above the common room. His smile faded immediately, nearly cowering away as he grew obviously afraid. My brows furrowed as I turned to see what he was looking at, but there was nothing there.

He began to silently panic, whispering quietly to himself as he pinched the bridge of his nose and kept his eyes down. We all watched in utter silence as he tried to pull himself together, looking back up towards the balcony, blinking rapidly as if he was trying to get something to disappear.

"Why are you here? What do you want from me?" he suddenly asked towards the empty space, his voice audibly shaking now.

"Dad?" Carl questioned, but he ignored him.

His breathing became heavy as he began to look around the room, "I can't help you! Get out!" he suddenly yelled.

I watched as he walked back and forth, brushing past me as I tried to reach out to him in attempts to stop his movements, "Woah easy Rick, calm down."

But that set him off completely. "You don't belong here! Get out! Please!" he yelled to no one in particular, raising his gun suddenly and began to wave it around.

Tyreese's eyes widened as he began to frantically talk, "Woah, woah okay, we'll leave. Ain't nobody gotta get shot here."

"What are you doing here?!" he screamed.

I pulled Carl closer to me and we both took a step back and I could feel him tense up, his eyes wide as he followed his father's figure. Glenn tried to get Tyreese's group out as fast as possible, frantically telling them that they could just go so Rick wouldn't do something he might regret.

When they finally retreated back towards the door, leaving the building with a slam, Rick stopped yelling, but he didn't look calm in the slightest. He looked up at the balcony one last time and sighed to himself, shaking his head as if he was trying to get rid of the memories. I held onto Carl tighter, starting to back away into the cellblock and he didn't hesitate to step back with me. The rest of the group started to follow us in silence, and it was clear everyone was disappointed at Rick's decision and a little scared at his outburst. Everything was falling apart.

Later in the night when everyone was peacefully sleeping, I couldn't for the life of me. I was thinking too much, and my brain just wouldn't calm down as I tossed and turned every few minutes uncontrollably. I thought about what happened just a few hours ago, I thought about The Governor now knowing where we are...and I thought about Daryl.

It's crazy, I thought, how someone can be in your life for so long and then suddenly...they're not. I began thinking about him more than I would ever admit to anyone around me, mostly because I didn't want them to worry. Though I knew no matter what, they would anyway.

A cry then ripped through the air and quickly pulled me out of my thoughts, immediately recognizing it was Judith who had just woken up from the floor below me. I stood to my feet as I quietly made it down towards Carl's cell, figuring I would take her since I couldn't sleep anyways and I knew Beth deserved a break.

I walked down the stairs and peeked into Beth's cell, seeing she was sleeping like a rock. She didn't even flinch when the baby kept crying, that alone proved how much she needed the rest. My feet were light and quiet as I made my way into Carl's cell, taking Judith out and slowly beginning to rock her as I made my way back out into the common room.

I figured she might be hungry again so I began to make a bottle, but she was still restlessly fussing in my arms. An idea popped into my head as I found the formula under the tables, glancing back behind me to make sure no one else was around, before I began to sing softly.

Hey Jude, don't make it bad

Take a sad song, and make it better

Remember to let her into your heart

Then you can start to make it better

Upon hearing the softness of my voice, that seemed to calm her the smallest bit as I tried quickly to finish up. But I practically jumped clean out of my skin when I heard someone faintly clapping from behind me, turning to see Rick standing near the door to the cellblock. His head was only peeking through as he looked at the two of us, smiling small as he walked in further. My lip barely quirked up in return before I turned back around to shake the bottle I had just finished.

I could hear his footsteps entering the room further, and I dreaded turning back around to face him, yet I somehow did when his movements stopped from only a few inches behind me.

"Didn't mean to scare you." he said quietly.

I looked up from the baby, "It's fine." I assured gently.

He paused for a moment as he gazed down at me, "I think we need to talk."

I immediately looked for an out, but running with a brand new baby probably wasn't the best idea. I just tried to put all my focus on Judith as I avoided his eyes, "About?" I asked, moving around him to sit at one of the tables.

He seemed to instantly follow and took a seat next to me, "We've kind of been at each other's throats recently...I just wanted to apologize for that."

Glancing up at him again, I saw he was being sincere, "It's okay. I've been kind of on edge lately and I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I'm sorry too."

He nodded gratefully before his mouth parted again, "Now...about Lori-"

"Don't." I stopped him.

"I just want to thank you for being there for Carl. For being there for Judith. For being there for...her." he said, his voice filled with pain at the mere mention of Lori. Not even being able to bring himself to say her name.

I couldn't look back up at him as he spoke, and I heard him sigh, "Will you look at me?" he asked softly.

I slowly lifted my gaze and looked into his eyes, watching him continue, "Don't blame yourself for what happened, alright? It's the last thing you need right now...especially when it's not true."

I felt myself start to get a little tearful at his words, looking away from him again as I didn't want him to notice. But then I felt his finger come under my chin and lift my head gently, to look at him again. He rubbed my chin softly with his thumb, his eyes pleading at me to say something.

I sighed softly and finally gave in, "Okay." I whispered.

He gave a small smile, "Okay." he repeated.

I smiled back at him and he removed his hand, pulling me into his side for a gentle hug. I leaned in as best as I could with the baby still in my arms, feeling him rest his chin on top of my head. For once he sighed in relief, relief in knowing that we were finally okay again, and we could stop walking on eggshells around each other. Relief in realizing that we needed each other a lot more than we both thought, seeking each other out at a time like this when things were so shitty. Relief in knowing now that we were okay.

We stayed like that for a while until I eventually noticed Judith had now fallen back asleep, and I slowly pulled away.

"Hey, will you put her back down? I'm gonna head outside for a bit to get some air." I informed him.

He nodded his head and took her from me carefully, "Why don't you get some sleep?" he suggested.

"I can't." I said simply before slowly making my way towards the doors.

Instant goosebumps rose on my skin at the chill in the air as soon as I stepped foot outside. My feet then carried me all the way out to the field to sit down in the grass and look up at the stars. I tried to just breathe the fresh air and let my mind relax, but I couldn't help but wonder if Daryl was okay. I knew in the back of my mind that he was, he knew how to take care of himself with little to nothing at all, but I couldn't help but worry.

If I was being completely honest with myself, I felt lost. I was trying to stay positive and not mention it around everyone else, but it was hard. Forcing myself to be strong about this was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Relying on someone else was never something easy for me, but yet it happened, and now I felt so off like a piece of me was missing.

So I stared up at the stars, thinking about how we were under the same sky, but miles and miles apart from each other.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* DARYL POV ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Merle and I set up camp near a clearing in the woods when we got too tired to keep going for the day. I sat perfectly still with my knees to my chest, staring mindlessly into the fire a few inches from me as I felt the warmth blow towards me at every gust of wind that passed by. Although I remained silent as I watched the giant flame, I still had one thing on my mind. Rose.

Regret began to fill my chest as the hours passed slowly, rethinking every dumb decision I made that led me to this point. But I knew I couldn't force her to come with me and make her leave the group, make her leave her own family. And I couldn't leave Merle, even though he was nothing more than a dumbass piece of shit that always got himself into trouble, he was still my brother. The brother I had lost for months, thinking he was dead. But even though I found him, a part of me knew there would always be something constantly missing now.

I didn't have much trouble leaving the group behind, knowing that even after a little over a year, I still didn't open up much to those people...not as much as I opened up to Rose. She was the only one who really understood me, understood my thoughts without me even having to say them out loud, and truly made me happy. Happier than I had ever been. Hell, Merle didn't even understand me as much as she did, and we had known each other our whole lives.

I missed her. I missed her more than I could put into words, but I knew I couldn't go back, not with Merle following behind me. They would never let him stay and he and I both knew that.

I then heard some rustling coming my way, not even glancing up as I heard him pushing his way past the bushes. Speak of the devil.

"I found more sticks for the fire." he commented, and I just grunted in response as I kept my eyes on the flames.

But I could almost feel the smirk grow on his face as he sat down across from me. "Whatcha thinkin about? Hm? Maybe a certain brunette with a nice ass?"

My eyes snapped up, "Shut up." I muttered.

He laughed to himself, "Nah, I thought it was cute how you practically begged her to come with us. She's more predictable than I ever imagined."

"The hell you talkin bout?" I asked with narrowed eyes.

"I could see it coming from a mile away that she wouldn't follow ya. You know why? Cause she don't give a shit about you. She used ya." he said.

"You don't know fucking anything about her." I snapped.

He shrugged, "Maybe. But don't ya think if she really loved you, she would be here with ya right now?"

I just stared at him, not having anything else to say as he laughed loudly at my sudden silence, "Thought so. You take first watch...you seem to have a lot to think about now, yeah?" he smirked again, knowing damn well that he got in my head.

He then turned his back to me and fell asleep within a matter of minutes, snoring loudly. I let his words replay over and over in my mind. I didn't want to believe him, he's been bullshiting ever since he could talk, so why the hell should I believe him? But I would be lying if I said I hadn't considered him to be telling the truth.

But I knew Rose. I knew her better than anyone else and I knew she cared about me, she still loved me just like I still loved her. I couldn't let him twist my thoughts like that because in the back of my mind, I knew he was always good at it. So I settled with looking at the stars above me, hoping that she was doing okay, and that she was safe behind the walls of the prison.

~ Thanks for reading!

#daryl dixon #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon x oc #daryl fanfiction #daryl dixon twd #daryl dixon the walking dead #daryl dixon x original character #daryl dixon x reader #the walking dead fanfiction #the walking dead daryl #the walking dead #twd daryl dixon #twd fanfiction #twd #twd daryl #norman reedus #norman reedus fanfiction #norman reedus x reader #desert rose #daryl x reader #daryl twd #daryl dixon x female reader

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Taiwan has one show, but that's all they need

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

April 2024 Wk 1

Ongoing Series - Thai

Two Worlds (Thurs IQIYI) ep 4 of 10 - I don’t say this often but I LOVE this love triangle. The longing gazes = chef's kiss. I like that we are finally getting flashbacks to Tai’s side of the love affaire. This show remains highly engaging. So pleased for MaxNat.  

Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 5 of 8 - More lesbians! Yay! Meanwhile, when our leads make up they make out! (Yes I’m proud of myself.) I think this might be BLs first rooftop sex scene. We’ve reached new heights, BLabies. (Yes I’m proud of that too.) Anygay, basically a soap opera at this point, I'm not thrilled but I don’t mind.

"Do you apologize for being straight?"

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 10 of 12 - It was lovely. Very well done celebrity leaving the closet ep. Nice ensemble work too. Next week is doom! As expected. 

Only Boo! (Sun YouTube) ep 1 of 12 - New main couple for GMMTV in an idol romance about a boy who dances good and a food stand vendor. It’s fine but overly very pulp feeling for something from GMMTV. I'm a little concerned.

1000 Years Old (Thurs iQIYI) ep 8 of 12 - meh.

To Be Continued (Sat C3 Thailand grey) ep 7 of 8 - Never turned up on my usual sites. So will have to wait until next week. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Unknown (Taiwan Tues YouTube & Viki) ep 7 of 11 - Qian was, indeed, the one who couldn’t let go. This show is fucking fantastic. It's the best thing I'm watching right now by a mile.

Jazz for Two (Korea Gaga/grey) eps 3-8fin - The bully and the blue-haired drummer side pairing were great. I hated the father. Hated him so much. Our main tsundere seme was a bit too tsundere for me. I was v annoyed by the time he finally softened. I'm amused by all the ways they finagled boys kissin-but-not-kissing in the first half of this show. 2024's "pan around the back of the head" has now become a "dipping of the brolly." We did, however, eventually get an okay kiss.

Honestly?

This was basically what I wanted from Given and didn’t get. So I’m pleased. The music still wasn't great, but you can skip those bits. A solid enemies to lovers BL, where the sins of brothers' past haunts the present. Great optics, decent chemistry, and a tidy script even if tsundere characterization went a bit extreme in some cases. 8/10 RECOMMENDED trigger for suicide

Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 5 of 6 - We got the past betrayal in detail and it was decently bad. Bitterness understood. Too soon to live together! The BL U-Haul strikes again. I do like their weird curry passive aggressive argument. This is an interesting show. Do I LOVE it? No. But I think I like it.

On a not-really-related note: adoption, including adult adoption, is actually pretty common in Japan (comparatively). It's often tied to business scionism.

My Strawberry Film (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 8fin - It all turned out to be a tragic GL in the end. Not BL = not my problem. No rating. I will forget its existence right about… now. 

Love is like a Cat (Korea Mon Viki) eps 1-2 of 12 - Okay, weirdly kinky with the head scratching. Not much has happened and I’m not wild about what has. 

It's done, ready to binge, but I suck

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps

It's airing but...

We Are (Weds GMMTV iQIYI) ep 1 of 16 - University ensemble BL featuring PondPhuwin, WinnySatang, AouBoom, MarcPawinPoon - basically the good kind of messy gay friendship group (so more My Engineer and less Only Friends). Looks a bit like the Kiss series but everyone is queer. I'm IN but I need my other computer and I'm traveling as usual. So I'll get caught up next week and probably won't regularly be able to watch this one.

Graduation Countdown (Taiwan YouTube) - It's too much for me to keep up with 2 minute verticals, I don't have that kind of TikTok endurance training.

A Secretly Love (Thai Sat WeTV grey) 10 eps - Completed. Worth watching?

Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school. Not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing.

Kiseki Chapter 2 (Sun iQIYI) 6 eps - It’s so boring DNFed at 2.

Close Friend Season 3: Soju Bomb! (Weds iQIYI) 6 - The problem with situational comedy BL is it must be situational, comedic and a BL. This show gets 1 of 3 claims correct. 33% is not a passing grade. Dropped at 3.

In the news

Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari is getting the undeserved honor of Furritsubs. Follow them for details. Tip 'em if you like 'em. (Will I watch it? Oh, probably. Damn it.)

Then Next Prince turned out to be a trailer only. Word on the webs is we will be lucky if we get it this year. It’s BL Princess Diaries. Jimmy has a new pairing (that boy from Night Dream) which is... interesting. All in all, this show does not look good. Pretty but not good.

Next Week Looks Like This:

4/11 Gray Shelter AKA Gray Currents (Korea ????) 4 eps - SooHyuk is only just surviving and reunites with YoonDae, an old friend. They end up living together. One of the leads is played by Choco of Choco Milk Shake.

4/12 Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - Kindly Ryota goes off to uni only to find his new roommate is his childhood bestie, Kazuhito. Kazuhito doesn’t have a girlfriend and Ryota tries to help him figure out why, they fall in love along the way. Same director as Old Fashion Cupcake.

Still to Come in April

4/18 At 25:00, in Alaska AKA 25 Ji, Akasaka de (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - Yuki lands his first starring role in a BL drama alongside superstar Asami (previously his senior at uni). Said superstar suggests they form a sham relationship until filming concludes. As they actually begin to fall in love, the spotlight begins to burn. I think I've seen this before (joke) and also the trailer doesn't inspire confidence.

4/26 My Stand-In (Thai iQIYI) 12 eps - adaptation of Chinese novel "Professional Body Double" by Shui Qiang Cheng. Stars Up (Lovely Writer) and Poom (Bake Me Please) directed by the same team as KP (not a recommendation IMHO - my biggest criticism of that show was the clashing directing styles). This one looks well complicated, lemme try: Joe is a stuntman for famous actor Tong. Joe falls in love with Ming but Ming sees Joe as nothing more than a Tong-replacement. After learning this horrible truth, Joe dies. Joe then wakes up in the body of another man also named Joe. He manages to rebuild the same life as before—with the same people eventually re-meeting Ming. Ming wants Joe back but Joe doesn't understand why. But Ming seems to know what's going on and wants to give him some kind of explanation.

I'm exhausted just trying to describe the plot.

Knock-Knock Boys (Thai WeTV) - 4 college friends conspire to help their friend lose his virginity. Familiar faces like Seng (yes, Billy's previous partner) and Best, news here.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

NOTE: It looks like one of my personal favorites of last year Unintentional Love Story is getting a spin off!

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

See City of Stars & Unknown.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are too much work.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire

If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy.

#Jazz for Two review #Jazz for Two #this week in BL #BL updates #Two Worlds the series #To Be Continued the series #Deep Night the series #City of Stars #Unknown the series #only boo #Love is Better the Second Time Around #Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto #1000 Years Old #BL series review #upcoming BL #BL news #BL reviews #BL gossip #Thai BL #Japanese BL #live action yaoi #Taiwanese BL #Koren BL #BL starting soon #BL coming soon

[demonologue]

Can we talk about the dragons some more?

I will be. Forever.

Many have already noted the care and detail that went into the design of each dragon, and I love watching the fall of Emon over and over to see new details each time.

But we also see so much of their personalities in this scene, and I love it so much?

Thordak is there to establish dominance, show his power, and accept worshipers, like a true red. He focuses on property damage (yes, people die, too, but that will happen when you nuke a mountain!) and showing off, because he wants lots of the ants in the city to survive. He needs their terrified adoration. We stan all of his "Is this your king?" speeches as he claims his throne.

Umbrasyl is doing what they've been told to do. As the least powerful of the remaining Conclave members, they are raining death from above but not overdoing it. Thordak has no domain and subjects if they melt it all. Bonus content fight between Umbrasyl and KimAllura. (P.S. they're not dead, guys!) I have a big soft spot for Umbrasyl, and I'm curious how much we will get to see the dynamic between the dragons as the story moves forward. They barely get along, and I hope we get to see them interacting with each other more. Something went down between them after Umbrasyl took over Gatshadow, and I want to know what it is that left the black dragon alone and stranded out there with busted palantiri.

Vorugal, it's been mentioned, we don't see a lot of in the fall of Emon. But that's exactly as it should be. Think about it: Vorugal is an elite hunter. They live a solitary life, always seeking more challenging prey to indulge in their favourite pastime. What is the point of destroying a city of helpless ants to Vorugal? So they go for the most challenging targets first, i.e. Allura. I'm disappointed that we didn't get the iconic shot of Vorugal perched on the side of her tower before they destroy it, but at least Vorugal still destroyed it in this version. Then it's almost like they're searching the city for worthy prey, doing the bare minimum to satisfy Thordak's orders. Of course Vorugal tracks them to Greyskull Keep. VM are worthy targets for the white dragon. I'm sad we didn't get to see Vorugal wrestle Thordak for dominance there. That was such a fantastic scene in campaign. Hopefully we'll get to see the two of them butting heads in a different way later on.

And Raishan, clever little pixie. She's just having fun with it. You see her casually flying around the city, blowing smoke here and there before she eats Scanlan's biggest fan. But she knows what she's doing. She killed Uriel with her first attack, and after that she's pretty much like a cat. What can I do that will satisfy Thordak's command but is the most amusing to me? Playing with VM, for one. She makes sure they know who she is, and that she knows who they are. After that, she's going to do what a green dragon does: be sneaky and infiltrate their keep even before they flee to Whitestone. She was a lot more subtle about it in campaign than she is about it here, but we want new viewers to feel like they've spotted something hidden, too (LARKIN WATCH!). Good job. Raishan was the first to give her name during the attack in the campaign, and of course she gave it to us here in the fall of Emon as well. We stan a queen. You'd better put some respect on her name.

Really looking forward to seeing more of her--and all the dragons--this season. Even if they just do cut-aways to their territory or Pike has dream sequences to show what's going on with them, I'll take it. We deserve more than just their death scenes. They are legendary villains and deserve as much love as the Briarwoods.

#the legend of vox machina #dragons #raishan #thordak #umbrasyl #vorugal #lovm #lovm season 2 #legend of vox machina #tlovm #lovm spoilers #vox machina spoilers #tlovm s2 #tlovm season 2

[brotherdusk]

it's time again for my favourite genre of post: tumblr user bee brotherdusk theorises wildly during the Foundation midseason!

on the menu this time is Poly and Constant's Imperial Vacation From Hell, or "oh god, I just wanted to make sure one of my favourite guys was going to be okay, but somehow I ended up sending over two dozen increasingly frantic messages to the discord while everyone else was asleep, pepe silvia-style"

(today I learned that grandpa joe shows up when you type "pepe silvia" into the gif search. deserved)

I'm gonna stick this under a readmore as it gets pretty long and image heavy, and potentially contains big spoilers for upcoming episodes, and I know some people want to watch the show completely unspoiled. all theories are based on official promotional videos already released by apple. no leaks or insider book knowledge here!

so I sort of stumbled into this theory in three stages, and I'm going to stick to that template as I talk through my analysis here, starting with:

Part 1 - I'm Genre Aware Now And Everything Hurts

let's be real, nobody saw Hari's (apparent) death coming in the last episode. death is far less of a concern in this show than in others, as the narrative all but guarantees the long-term survival of its core characters. Hari (apparently) dying so quickly after having his body restored was a massive shock, and jolted us out of the complacency that the show had lulled us into.

when the title and description of next week's episode dropped, fan concern quickly turned to Poly, who @gaal-dornick and @aquitainequeen noted has started to exhibit the classic symptoms of Tragic Mentor Figure Disease:

also, there's, y'know, The Guillotine Situation as shown in Trailer 1:

Poly's death seemed so likely that I was beginning to dread the coming episodes, but something was nagging at me; I had a vague memory of seeing a trailer where he was on Terminus and in a situation that we haven't yet seen him in. maybe he does survive his brush with Brother Day, then? I started rewatching all of the trailers, teasers, and character spotlight videos that Apple released in the run-up to season two, and came across something way wilder than I'd expected:

Part 2 - Star Bridge 2: Council Boogaloo

I found another camera shot of Poly and Constant's apparent execution in the Brother Dawn character spotlight video - note the pillars in front of the crowd, the flags in the back, and Dawn, Sareth, Demerzel, Dusk, and Rue standing on the platform behind Day and the prisoners.

note also the onlookers in the maroon robes, who are also visible in the guillotine closeup I posted above...

...hey, it's the Galactic Council as seen in 2.06, with their GILF-y leader at the front in both scenes!

remember how terrified Cleon XII was of their judgement in the season one finale? we still don't know what their exact deal is, but they're clearly big cheeses politically if XII of all people is afraid of them:

here's yet another angle of the execution from Trailer 2 - same setup, same arrangement of Empire on the podium:

let's see what happens in that shot, will we? ..... oh

... did an explosion just go off in the heart of Trantor and potentially take out the entire galaxy's government in one go???? (I mean, Empire are probably fine with their auras and nanobots and backups, but I'm not feeling too good about the Council's chances right now...)

wait - the pulse and shape that appear on the horizon bear a striking resemblance to the new Foundation whisper ships - especially Poly and Constant's ship, Spirit Rising, which is currently in the hands of Hober Mallow...

why did he take their ship, again?

holy fucking shit Hari Seldon you insane rat bastard (admiring, horrified, impressed). what have you DONE. a blade in case the religious hand of friendship doesn't work out, you say??

(sidenote: this was literally the Anacreon plan for the Invictus in the first season - the scale of the destruction would have been magnitudes worse due to the Invictus' size, but same concept)

honestly, I kind of hope the entire Council perishes in the Mallowpocalypse, if only because it would make this exchange in 2.06 deliciously ironic:

the worst detectives in the world finally found their shared braincell and made a deduction! I'm proud of them!

also, Glawen literally saw this coming in 2.04 and Bel brushed him off. ¯_(ツ)_/¯ sad!

regarding casualties - I think this shot from Trailer 1 is the aftermath of the blast. Day was standing much closer to the explosion than the rest of Empire and Dominion, and so would have taken more damage, aura or not. I also see Sareth, Rue (?), and Dawn - jury's out on whether being dead is the latest item added to Dusk's rapidly expanding list of problems?

a direct attack on Trantor would also explain why Day goes on a personal tour of the Outer Reach and ends up on Terminus, screaming for an audience with Hari Seldon (Trailer 1 again):

and hey, Poly's right behind him! he's Empire's best chance of getting a personal audience with the Prophet, after all. Poly also pops up in Day's character spotlight video, in what I'm guessing is the execution scene again, judging from the collar and the guard restraining him. it might even be the aftermath of the blast, since the shot is pretty chaotic and dusty looking. what's got him so upset?

... and it was at this moment that I realised that while Poly is present in the later Terminus scenes with Day, Brother Constant is not, and I started to worry that I'd been focusing on the wrong person the whole time, leading to...

Part 3 - What About Constant?

oh no. the question of Constant's safety has been hanging over both Poly and the viewer since 2.02. oh no

I thought I might have caught a glimpse of her in the Teaser 1 video - being restrained in the background as Day does his infamously-giffed-to-hell Big Steppy on Hober's throat - but I still wanted more concrete proof of her wellbeing.

and finally I found her in the Pillars of Foundation video, alive and well, but -

HER NECK!! HER NECK!!!

if Constant's life is just barely saved by Hober showing up in the nick of time to prevent her decapitation by an insane tyrant I will literally never be normal again. romance. that's romance. (also incredibly shitty of Vault!Hari to take her blind faith and turn her into a pawn for the Empire to slaughter, but I guess that's expected behaviour from him by now.)

... I was literally about to hit post on this theory, but I just realised; that scene in Teaser 1 where Day is facing down a bishop's claw... we all assumed he was being attacked by a wild beast in the Outer Reach - but what if he's lying in the ruins of the podium on Trantor, and the bishop's claw is a freed Beki going on a rampage? god I hope this happens. imagine being Emperor of the Galaxy, about to perform some casual executions before dinner, and suddenly you're flat on your ass with a Hell Dinosaur about to bite your face off. incredible scenes

and that's all I've got! TLDR; Hari knew that the emperors and Galactic Council would become increasingly paranoid and aggressive as the Empire contracted, and would jump at the chance to publicly end an attempted religious takeover by the "barbarian" Outer Reach. That mass gathering at the execution would be the perfect time to strike with a whisper ship, a technology which the Empire has no idea even exists. This enrages Day into visiting Terminus to deal with the Foundation in person, and potentially destabilises the Empire further if the Council have been wiped out. Empire's structure and dignity are decimated without a single shot being fired - and if there is going to be an eventual, physical war, the Foundation is now in a much better position to fight it.

again, this is just me making a theory and connecting everything together with red string etc etc. I haven't attempted to explain everything, such as the Spacers' or Riose's involvement, and have doubtless got some details wrong - but I'm really excited by how things are connecting and can't wait for next week's episode :}

#foundation #foundation season 2 #foundation apple tv #foundation meta #hari seldon #poly verisof #brother constant #hober mallow #brother day #cleon xvii

[irreplaceable-ecstasyy]

The Bitter Cold

For your Brienne request, how about something that takes place after Jammie left in season 8 with reader finding and comforting Brienne etc etc? - from @emilynissangtr

Wordcount: 2154

[Thank you for this one <3 I'm pretty sure quite a number of us have imagined jumping through the screen to comfort her. :( ]

The sound of hooves thundered in the winter silence, long enough to drown out the sobs of a woman for a moment until it was the only thing that filled the stiff air. Another heartbreak. You had seen it all before at the bar you used to work at, long before the wars, where men and women alike were either the victim or guilty of heartbreaks. Had you paid any less mind to the scene, you would have walked off to your quarters in peace but you found your feet planted to the ground. The man who had ridden off at this ungodly hour of the night had been Jaime Lannister. As for the heartbroken figure left to weep in the bitter snow, her tall frame was unmistakable. Ser Brienne of Tarth.

You had never seen her cry before nor had you seen an ounce of emotion from the woman other than her scowl. You were acquainted with her at most from the day she arrived at Winterfell with her squire for everyone had been called to train in the fields for the war. Some part of you had always been infatuated by her, mostly from the stories you had heard of the woman knight. Her bravery, her skills; she was an absolute daydream. Were it not for the war, she would have occupied her thoughts. You had seen her compassion and the raging fire in her eyes that you thought would be entirely impossible to snuff out. But here you were at her worst, the fire barely flickering in her tearful gaze.

Her sobs wracked through her and you could see how she shuddered so violently. Then it clicked that it may well be the cold biting into her skin. Anyone would be mad to wander into the snow with only a robe on, and madder to remain in the cold numb the pain of the heartache. Watching her was enough to make you feel like you were freezing under all your layers, and you were not heartless enough to leave her there. Tugging off your cloak, you hasted over to her and, in your best attempts, you tossed your cloak over her shoulders.

"You'll catch your death out here."

"Then leave me be. . ."

She refused to meet your gaze when you stared up at her. Her eyes were fixed on her feet to save herself the humiliation of tear-stained cheeks. Hide the evidence of this stupidity. Knotting the string of the cloak with a sense of finality, you took her by the arm with no room to argue. You were already walking.

"One man isn't the end of the world. Come on."

Reluctantly, she obeyed. For a woman so stoic, she still listened so easily. A soldier's instinct, perhaps. With Brienne trailing behind you, you ushered her back to her quarters quietly. You did not need anyone waking up with a hundred questions to pick at the woman's remaining sanity. The room greeted you with a dimming glow at the hearth and a pleasant warmth. At least you won't have much to fuss over. You sat the still-weeping knight on a chair in front of the fireplace and went to attend to the fire, feeding it with more timber. Her sniffling said enough that she was already calming down, much to your relief, or it may be because she had no more tears to weep. Did soldiers cry as regular folk would?

Too many questions.

You had the fire roaring once more and heat began to pool into the room, soaking you up in its comfort. Turning to Brienne, you were surprised that she had lifted her head to stare into the flames, unbothered by the tears that spilled from her cheeks. Now that she was away from the public eye, it did not hurt to lose what little dignity she had lost since the moment you saw her out there. With no napkin, you dried her tears away with your sleeves, cheeks cupped delicately within your hands.

She pushed your hands away when the tears finally stopped, but you were not ready to leave just yet. Getting comfortable on the carpet, you took a seat on the floor beside her. You could not find it in you to leave her by herself. The crackling of the flames was brought you and Brienne some sense of serenity, but it was prodding at the awkward tension in the air. Neither of you spoke, but from the way Brienne's exhaled heavily, there was something at the tip of her tongue.

"I... I fear he may never come back," she murmured under her breath.

"That's what happens in wars... People leave and we're left to pray," you answered. "Shouldn't we hope that they will return?"

Scoffing, Brienne casted her usual scowl at you. "It isn't just the war"- She considered her words carefully before settling angrily with, "What do you know of wars anyway?"

You shook you head dejectedly and turned away. "You're right. I know nothing, especially when I have nothing to lose. And I know Ser Jaime's gone back to his sister."

"That's where his heart lies. Who am I to take that away from her?"

"Queen Cersei is his family. You would return to your family in Tarth if you knew of the dangers that would be upon them, wouldn't you?" you tried to rationalize. "Have you no hope that he might come back at all?"

Brienne was often sensible but in her flurry of emotions, she could not bear to listen to your reasoning. Her cheeks were red, her stare intense as if she might explode at any moment. The tears had gone so quickly.

"The more you hope, the higher you expect, and the higher you go, the harder you fall. You'd be foolish to fall into such a trap," Brienne snapped, but her face fell. "I've lived on false hope before. Never again. I just can't..."

There was a part of you that wished you knew Brienne better. In one sitting, you were learning more about her than the few months you had been training under her command. The wall she had built around herself was to protect the little girl she once was, the girl who was never given the fair life of ladyship for how she looked. Stubborn as a mule. You wondered just how much she had to endure to become so numbed and yet so bottled up.

Comfort was not your strongest suit, let alone with a person you barely knew. Lending a listening ear seemed to be enough for Brienne took a breather to get a hold of herself. Tears threatened to spill again but you sat up on your knees to reach her, brushing them away with your thumbs. You did not miss the way she leaned into the contact and lingered there until you withdrew your hands. Your palms were burning.

"He's all I have," she managed in a hoarse whisper. All I have at love.

"That's a lie."

She rolled her eyes. "Spoken like a person who gets to choose."

"Enough." You stood up in front of her, but somehow she could still meet you at eye level when seated. You mustered your courage. "You give yourself a lot less credit than you deserve. If you managed to swoon Jaime Lannister, you might as well be unstoppable."

"And yet no one is willing to give me a chance like he did."

"It's their fault that their missing out."

"Missing out on what?" Brienne laughed pathetically. "A beast of a woman? A thing whose etiquette compares to a bear's? Humiliating me for everyone to see?!" She went on, and each addition to the list made your stomach twist painfully.

Unable to handle any more, you clamped a hand over her mouth, the other squeezing her own tightly. "They're missing out on someone who has so much give. As soon as someone gives a shit about the way you should look or behave because you're a woman, they're worthless. Who are they to define your worth because of how womanly you are?"

She stared at you with wide eyes and when you removed your hand, she was gaping at you. She wanted to argue against your rambling but not a word slipped from her lips. With pursed lips, she gripped your hand tightly, unsure of how to accept what had been a praise or more, acceptance. No one had ever raised their voice to express their praises. Most of the time, when a person yelled at her, it was either a command or a jeer. Brienne the Beauty. The thought of the nickname made her grimace.

You, on the other hand, were not nearly done yet. You dove head first into your thoughts and they were all coming out at full force, every bit of it a truth that Brienne needed to hear.

"That's what Ser Jaime saw in you. It's a miracle how you changed that dense lump of muscle but you did it anyway. He will come back for you when it's all over. Even if he doesn't, you will find someone who might appreciate you even more. So, if you still think me delusional for believing that people are missing out and that you won't get another chance, think again."

Her disbelief was clear but her hand stayed in yours. "You say such things... Things I wish were truer, but look at the state we live in. I don't need your pity to make me feel better, [Y/N]."

She remembered your name. It did wonders to your heart but you were too focused on your current objective. "I'm not saying this out of pity. I'm telling you everything that's been on my mind since I was told about you."

That knocked the wind out of her, humiliation settling in. "From who...?"

"It doesn't matter. What does is that I've wanted to say all these things to you because you deserve to hear it from someone. It's evident that no one has from the way you're reacting. So, there you go."

Working at a bar did not prepare you to comfort others but if there was one thing you were darn good at, it was telling people the truth in their faces. You told off drunken people who needed to be humbled, lifted those who were drinking their sorrows away and spouted facts that people needed to hear rather than what they wanted. Right now, you were doing the same for Brienne, whether she was willing to take it or not. There was not a confrontation that had ever gotten you as emotional as you were now, but that could only mean one thing. You were attached to her. You cared. There was no lie there for you.

Brienne saw the way you dropped your eyes to the floor, left with nothing more to say. Her silence did not help the case but what more was there to say when you had said everything? Even her sharp wit had no retort to defend herself. She mistook your conflict for defeat and it seemed as though she appeared ungrateful. With the hand she was still holding, she pulled you close and enveloped you in an embrace. Gentle words were not her strength either but a hug was well needed for the both of you which she delivered.

You rested your head upon hers and sighed softly. This would suffice. It meant you did something right since you were still here and not outside. Neither of you wanted to let go. Brienne had already gotten comfortable resting against you, her head tuck snugly against your chest while your arms were wrapped around her neck in a half cradle. This was... nice. Running your fingers through her hair, you spoke once more.

"I can't promise you that he will return but what I can give you is my company. My friendship. Even if you don't accept, there are still so many others around you who care for you. You are not alone," you reminded her firmly.

Shutting her eyes, Brienne nodded, her embrace tightening around you. "Thank you..."

You stayed there for what felt like hours but you could go on for days if you had to. The fire was already flickering and it pained you to part from the hug to replenish the firewood. Where her arms had been around your waist was burning hot from her touch, a sensation you had never felt before but it was not at all unpleasant. You basked in it while you could. It was too late to dwell any longer for the Knelt in front of the fireplace, Brienne rose from the chair to stand beside you while you did the work.

"Will you stay?" she whispered.

You felt your heart skipped a beat but you managed to muster a smile. "If my commander wishes."

#brienne got #brienne of tarth x reader #brienne of tarth #brienne #nat.txt #this was gonna be a tiny one shot but i think i went a little overboard :))) #gwendoline christie

[stinalotte]

Season 5, Episode 6: The Shrine

I said I had to gather my thoughts before I would be able to write something coherent. I still don't know if I can do it justice. It's weird, but I hesitate to call The Shrine my favorite episode because it's so devastating. It's very shippy, it has phenomenal acting from everyone, the story is heartbreaking, it should be perfect - but it just hurts so much. If this is my favorite episode, what kind of masochist am I? (Don't answer that, that was rethorical.)

I'm placing this under a cut because this is gonna be long.

The cold open on this one is just brutal. Rodney is already pretty far gone, and he calls himself "Mr Rodney McKay" instead of Dr, because "doctors are smart, and he's not smart anymore". To know what's happening to you, to slowly lose your mental capabilities and to be able to still process what's happening, that's cruel. And then he's calling for John, and that's when I had to pause the video for the first time because the tears were already coming. The title sequence hadn't even started.

Fuck.

I lost my grandmother to Alzheimer's a couple years ago. She had a slow and steady decline and thankfully, it was one of those cases where she just forgot more and more, but without the mental anguish. She wasn't panicking, or aggressive, or even agitated. Just a smiling, sweet old lady, who in the end didn't remember how to sit or eat or breathe. When she died, I couldn't cry. I was too busy consoling my mother and aunt at the funeral. The first time I cried was when I rewatched The Shrine, years later. It just shook something loose in me. It's also the point where I decided that if I ever got diagnosed, and was still in a state to do something about it, I would end my life on my terms. I'm not putting anyone through that.

I remember Kate Hewlett saying in an interview that a lot of people on set where crying during those scenes because they had family members with dementia, and that she had to leave the room at one point because it hit close to home for her too.

At first I thought it was mean that everyone was like, "Yeah I realized something was wrong when Rodney was being nice to everyone", but then I thought, no, that's actually a good point. Because his friends were uncomfortable with alternate universe Rod (who was too suave and cool) and they're uncomfortable with a Rodney who is uncharacteristically nice. They love him as he is, not a polished version.

I know everyone is giving Dr Keller shit for not wanting to try the Shrine, but I really think it's because she's a doctor. I work with doctors, and almost weekly I have discussions about respecting a patient's advanced directive. I've had a doctor wanting to install a gastric tube in a patient who was at the end of their life. We had the advanced directive that CLEARLY stated they didn't want that. When I confronted the doctor, she was almost angry. "But they will starve! I can't let them starve!" Yes, you can, and you will, and you have to. The hardest thing for a medical doctor is to have to sit back and not be allowed to do something that might help the patient. I think that where she's coming from. There are treatments to be tried, and if Rodney is taken to the Shrine, all those other options stop. I still think she was wrong and I don't like her approach, but I think it's an explanation why she was acting the way she was.

And then we have Rodney running to John's room in the middle of the night because of course that is the first and only place he'd go. It hurt to watch him be so frantic and desperate. And John is right there for him, grounding him, telling him, I'm not going anywhere.

Beer On The Pier. Yes, you have to write it like that because this scene is a fixed point in time and a goddamn cornerstone of this ship.

Rodney, knowing this is probably the last night he'll be this lucid, wants to say goodbye. And John doesn't let him. Because Rodney's stuck with him until the end. He's not going to turn away, no matter how ugly it's going to get. The very thought of saying goodbye is so foreign to John that he doesn't even want to discuss it. "That's final."

(Also, just for aesthetics alone, the night shots of the city are beautiful.)

I'm trying to be a bit less rambly, but what can you do when you have this masterpiece of an episode?

In the cave, when Rodney is intense pain, John has his arm around him the whole time and doesn't let go until he is himself again.

I love how everyone is so caring and surrounds him with love.

And ugh, the surgery - with fucking power tools. Barbaric. But necessary. But man, to hold your friend's head in your hands, holding him still, while a literal drill is going into his skull? I'd have passed out.

The only tiny little thing that was a bit jarring was Rodney's confession to Jennifer at the end, and just because for me, it came a bit out of left field. But I am nothing if not good at ignoring things that I don't like, so I'll just refer to fanfics that fix this. No harm done.

And finally.

David Ian Hewlett.

Holy fuck, dude.

HOW are you not buried under a shitload of Emmys? How is there not a whole wing of your house dedicated to housing the tons of awards you should have gotten for this? (I know he did get quite a few, but I'm talking custom built shelves in at least four rooms. Minimum.)

Everyone brought their A game acting wise, but this guy knocked it out of the park. It was heartbreaking, moving, extremely believable, and just jaw-dropping. David is, in my opinion, one of the best, if not the best actor of the franchise, and I don't say that lightly. I have a massive crush on Joe Flanigan and he's great, same with Amanda Tapping, but David is just fantastic.

So yeah. There you have it. My very concise, totally normal opinion of this episode. I doubt anyone reads all of this, but hey, this is my tumblr and I do what I want.

If you did indeed sit through all of this, I'd love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to tag or reply or add stuff.

#stargate atlantis #john sheppard #rodney mckay #mcshep #it feels wrong to tag this disaster husbands because that's ususally so lighthearted #episode 5x06: The Shrine #thoughts and opinions™️