#i'm tired and my brain just creates whole things that cater to my sense of humour sometimes

[cangrellesteponme]

Let me introduce you to...

The Sebagni "Do these people know how to read?" AU

(it's going to be a long one, but it's semi-humourous with clichés, so bear with me)

...in which Sebastian "I'm allergic to stupidity" Michaelis (who may or may not be human, who knows) is a tired teacher who hates his colleagues so, SO much, so he spends a lot of time in a library, which is huge, but old and the location (it's near a very creepy graveyard, for the vibes :D) doesn't help, so no one really goes there as much as he does. He has his habits, his spot (a very sturdy cold gray sofa which seems out of place in the worn-out yet warm browns and golds of the library) and a very precise routine. Nothing interrupts his routine. (Only cats are allowed to. Anything can be interrupted for cats.)

Until the day he finds a tiny brat (hi Ciel :)) sitting in his spot. He seriously considers committing infanticide (which would've saved him many headaches, but he doesn't know that yet), but doesn't, because at least the child is quiet. And the day gets worse because the tiny ball of vague anger sitting in Sebastian's beloved sofa somehow transforms into a ball of (probably affectionate) rage as Ciel gets bothered by the exceptionally bright, sweet and LOUD sunshine boy we all know as Soma, who somehow knew he was going to this library??? Soma's bestie radar is powerful.

Kid's are loud, Sebastian hates his life, and decides to leave, borrowing a book (which he couldn't read because c h i l d r e n) on his way out and guess what? That doesn't go that smoothly either. The whole "you gotta tell the librarian you're borrowing that book so they write down your name probably in order to chase you down and kill your family if you forget to give it back" thing is much easier to do when said librarian isn't busy having a chat with someone.

*insert everyone's favourite cliché "oh the man is hot AND respectful" kinda thing as Seb and Agni finally meet, small talk, they immediately like eachother because in this house Sebagni is a slow burn romance but friends at first sight*

After spending ten minutes ✨looking respectfully✨ while talking, Sebastian finally leaves.

Life is messy, he's very busy, he somehow ends up lowkey adopting the brat, who's a pupil in his school, though he's not in any of Sebastian's classes. ("You can't eat a whole cake for lunch????" "Yes I can??????" "No you can't????????" "What are you, my mum??????????" "If it gets you to eat an actual meal instead of this- how did you even get that dessert, I- anyway if it works,I might as well be." "You want to be like her? Then perish." "..." "...anyway...")

A whole week goes by before he can go to the library again.

You know where I'm going with this.

✨Oh no, Mr. Hot and Respectful is the new librarian so now Sebastian gets to see him very regularly and there will be many conversations about lots of things!✨

Anyway that's like, 1% of the many many thoughts I have on this, but I realised halfway through that I did not feel like writing a whole novel in a tumblr post, so that's it for now. I might mention it again someday. Who knows.

#sebagni #i'm tired and my brain just creates whole things that cater to my sense of humour sometimes #so this happened. it is what is is. #kuroshitsuji