#i've had my fill of those

[antennatoheaven]

i feel like being a guy who loves fighting so much while living in a sugar plum soft world gets really boring (outside of the occassional intergalactic threat) if you feel the need to beat up a gorilla 30 fucking times. like what's the deal man? are you getting enough enrichment in your enclosure? do you wish you were in dark souls? could you maybe leave the local wildlife alone for a bit?

#kirby #meta knight #kirby series #kirby and the forgotten land #gorimondo #those intergalactic threats are the enrichment in his enclosure #sorry i cant sleep and i was thinking about the bat again #like. yeah i've beaten the colloseum an obscene amount of times for having it unlocked since yesterday (i gotta beat my highschore) #but thats probably the most fun he's had in a while. seriously whags this guys deal #it constantly feels like someone needs tp throw him a meat filled pumpkin so he can tear it tp shreds or smth #and yeah ok. gorimondo could have been instigating those fights #but like. attacking a town for over 30 times seems excessive #especially if you keep getting your ass handed to you #edit: why did a post thats literally just my train of thought at 4am get so many notest what #ramblings

[queenlucythevaliant]

We see him come and know him ours

Russia: "Carol of the Russian Children," traditional // Kenya: The Nativity, Elima Njau // France: "Bring a Torch, Jeanette Isabella," Nicolas Saboly // Haiti: Madonna and Child, Ismael Saincilus // Australia: "The Three Drovers," William James // China: Tryptic by Lu Hongnian // Canadian/Algonquian: "Huron Carol," Jean de Brébeuf

#the visual depictions are lovely #but what really gets me every time are the little cultural details in the music #music that tells the story of the Nativity while placing it in a world that's familiar to the listener #fur robed moujiks on snowboard plateaus in place of middle eastern shepherds #bark lodges instead of stables and rabbit skin in place of swaddling clothes #wandering hunter and chiefs from far off places instead of shepherds and wise men (man i love the Huron Carol) #and little french girls running to gather the village to come see Jesus #it's easy for an excess of historical concern to make Jesus feel distant and far off #/I know/ that Jesus was born in the ancient near east and have had my fill of books and sermons and the like unpacking the implications #I've laughed with my friends and family at the wild inaccuracies of Nativity sets and tellings #the crazy blonde mary in the kids nativity set at Walmart #what is that alpaca doing at the living Nativity don't they know those are south American? #yada yada #and then i look at these carols and think. it's okay not to get mired in the history. good even #yes Jesus entered into time and space in a very specific manner #but he also came for all of us #as another carol says: we see him come and know him ours #i just think this practice is lovely #that the impact of the Incarnation was such that it send little french girls running to their villages #and drew algonquin hunters and russian peasants to the manger to see him #it's the great crowd of witnesses in a way #all of us together preparing him room throughout all the corners of the earth #in Bethlehem that night it was only the shepherds who got to see him #but in spirit it was all of us #because it's just like the angel said: #good news of great joy which will be to all people #to all people #starting with the shepherds and going out to all the earth #unto us a child is born #intertextuality

[fivewholeminutes]

A Series of Small Offerings

PART ONE -6- Jericho

My hands are not worthy

HELLO TO MY FAVOURITESTEST LINE FROM THAT SONG EVER

Not pictured: me singing this line over and over again while filling the bg and jumper with markers

(Am I cheating and using markers now? I sure am, I've had enough of pencils on this paper.)

Notable mention: the thick golden and black markers I've used in these last two pieces are ~grave inscription fixing markers~ bc I'm this edgy (kidding, they're just really good markers).

Notable mention 2: for someone who loves drawing eyes and absolutely hates drawing hands the hand-eye ratio so far is 7-0 (6-0 if we're not counting the skeleton hand and the eyes here that are closed). I have left my comfort zone and never looked back (and for that, THANK YOU AGAIN, LEVYNN!!!)

#those are calluses btw there are more colluses irl trust me the photo and editing killed them #jericho my beloved #ii my beloved #filling the huge parts with markers my beloved #original white mask my beloathed #terrible the witcher (2002) polish series playing in the distance for me today and making me laugh uncontrollably my beloved #(spreading the 2002 series propaganda; netflix version WISHES it was this good) #i've had so much fun making this one including taking a reference photo of myself while at my aunt's yesterday #if you're wondering: all the hands i drew so far (except for the skeleton one) are mine #i am making many compromising pictures of myself for this challenge i hope my cia agent doesn't save them to blackmail me later #a series of small offerings #sleep token #sleep token fanart #alex vs the mortifying ordeal of having her art perceived #SORRY FOR EXTRA RAMBLING TODAY I AM IN A GOOD MOOD

[zerodaryls]

it's so funny (read: sad) that if bigoted fuckheads didn't insist i was a woman simply by virtue of my body at birth, i'd probably be chill with she/her pronouns in addition to he/they. if my mom didn't insist i was her daughter, i'd probably let her call me that, and we could still have a relationship.

i'm nonbinary and 'gendered' words are hypothetically meaningless, but because there are so many people who are more interested in telling me who i am rather than lovingly and curiously letting me express my own sense of self, those words carry trauma.

there's no reason a nonbinary person like myself can't be a son and a child and a daughter. there's no reason a nonbinary person like me can't go by he, they, and she.

'she' is not a slur. 'daughter' is not derogatory. 'beautiful' 'pretty' 'gorgeous' 'feminine' are not insults.

to the contrary, they're parts of language that express certain facets of a multi-faceted human existence, like mine.

and i have this sad, mournful feeling that if it weren't for unloving, condescending people, i'd probably be down to be called any of those things alongside my usual masculine/neutral terminology.

but i'd rather die than let anyone tell me what i have to be called.

#i try to reclaim 'feminine' words for myself in private #calling myself 'babygirl' when i need to chill out. or saying i feel pretty. or going 'she needs help' when i'm struggling lmao. #but there's still so much fucking trauma in those words from the people who've forced them on me #who've snarled in my face that GOD made me ONE THING and ONE THING ONLY and that's a WOMAN (stepdad) #who've guilted me for taking their precious perfect daughter away as if i'm fucking dead (mother) #who've mocked me and everyone like me as if we're not the experts on our own sense of self (general transphobic public) #like. i'm not a fucking man. i'm not a fucking woman. i'm nonbinary. gender is absurdity as a concept. i'm done with it. #but being called a man or a son or a guy or 'he' or WHATEVER in that vein is fine and dandy because i've never had anyone say #'that is all you can EVER be'. or worse: 'that is what GOD made you to be and you have a ROLE to fill' #(christianity pls die approximately yesterday thanku 💖) #so yeah. idk. ranting yet again about Cis Audacity. #the complete lack of empathy. the lack of curiosity even. #the condescending bullshit. the 'i understand you better than you do'. the fucking AUDACITY. #i am the expert on myself. i am the ONLY expert on myself. period. no contest. not a debate. #i understand myself better than anyone else is CAPABLE of understanding me. #i could call myself 'she' and understand that i meant it in a nonbinary way. #in fact i could even see myself letting other trans people call me feminine terms at some point in the future. when i've healed more. #but cis people? probably not. they can call me 'he' or 'they' or they can fuck off & never get to know me because they don't wanna know ME #/end rant #any terfs/bigots that try to touch this post will be swiftly blocked and quite possibly cursed. have the day you deserve <3

[perhaps-mr-collins-has-a-cousin]

Hello praying people, I'm not doing well and would really appreciate your prayers right now <3

#long very boring and unnecessarily detailed tag monologue incoming‚ feel free to skip: #this is going to sound like a silly thing to be hitting rock bottom over #but i’m fairly certain i have a semi-rare skin condition known as sensitive skin syndrome #which is basically where skin gets progressively more sensitive #until it won’t tolerate the topical application of anything at all without getting irritated #usually it happens to people on the skin of their face and i have it there but i also specifically have it on my lips #(which apparently is extremely not normal; i found a dermatologist’s case study from like 2019 of one woman who had it on her lips #and according to this case study there were no other cases of people having it on their lips #in all the dermatological literature he had read) #i can’t follow the protocol which all the journal articles i’ve been able to find say is helpful for the rest of the face which is basicall #leave the area the heck alone for at least a year #because if i don’t apply anything to my lips for more than two or three days they will get so dry they crack and bleed #so it’s looking like one way or another i may be having to deal with dry burning irritated lips for the rest of my life #and i’m not dealing with the thought of that very well #i’ve already suffered so much anguish from extreme sensitivity on the rest of my face #and not being able to take proper care of the skin there #and this is just too much for me #i know God is allowing this for a reason but it’s filling me with so much frustration and panic and despair that i don’t know how to go on #but i must and i will #this isn’t a serious or a life-threatening condition but it’s looking like a pretty hopeless one and it’s hurting me badly #and i would appreciate prayers that it would just be healed or that i would know what to do #i think i will try going to my dermatologist but somehow i doubt she's even heard of sensitive skin syndrome #on a COMPLETELY unrelated note i'm just about to get my period and also for two days i've ''eaten'' nothing but vegetable smoothies #and those in pretty small amounts because they're disgusting #(do a detox my hormonal health doctor said) #(it'll be fun she said) #ok if you read this far you're so brave braver than any u.s. marine etc. #thanks for reading ily <3

[novantinuum]

self care is unfollowing people who spread negativity on ur dash!! like Damn! yeah i theoretically Agree with your crit but i really Don't wanna see it either bc i want to Celebrate content instead of hyperfixating on the stuff i didn't like about it! yeet!!!

#jen rambles #i had someone call a SU fic i wrote once a 'fix it' and i'm just like #NO!!! #it was Not a fix it! #because a fix it would assume that i think i am Better and More Smart than the creators and that is hubris i really don't want #to take upon myself #i just like!! taking the elements i like and writing More of it! #that's all #i also feel like there's lots of people who just crumple when things in fiction aren't coherently explained #but i've always seen those holes as Opportunities? #idk like on one hand is leaving holes in your narrative bad writing? likely #but also the very soul of fan creation has Always been stepping alongside canon and re-imagining it #and oft filling those holes #and i just wish more people would join me in doing so in good faith to the source material #instead of doing it in that sort of 'ughhh so like since canon fucking sucks i'm fixing it :)' way #one day i'll prob Myself talk about the issues i had with the plotting of This Thing and you'll see tons of overlap with what #others are saying about it #but like idk. just why make that your sole focus? doesn't that bum other people out too? #like it kind of breaks my heart seeing people so fixated on the imperfections that they can't even enjoy what Was #i just don't get this mindset

[scribbledghost]

Idea I like…

Simon reading old school pulp romance novels.

It started as just, an impulsive “I need something different to get me out of my own head.” Like when you do something out of left field to help with certain anxieties.

He didn’t expect there to be smut.

He also didn’t expect to like it…?

There’s a focus on emotion, there’s trust, it’s frankly quite soft. It helps, and he didn’t expected to, with reclaiming his sexuality a bit.

He has a small collection, because romance quality is all over the place and he needs a few guaranteed ‘good ones’, and they’re all beat up pretty bad because he got them for like 50p at the thrift store.

They’re all also older, (50 shades decimated the romance genre and it has yet to recover) and he sneers at the bad photoshop covers of the more modern covers. (I have opinions™️ and I think Simon deserves to have some for silly things too)

Y'know, I'm 100% with you on this one. (Especially him sneering at the new photoshop covers. Where's the ART!? Where's the meticulously hand-painted vaguely blurry shirtless male protag!?)

He definitely has a few favorites that he goes back to when he's got some downtime and just wants a good story. I think he's VERY picky about the smut that's included, so when he finds sort of a holy grail where the smut isn't awful and it actually has a good story with it, he holds on to it. The rest he just re-donates.

Also you are completely correct that he does not read anything published later than like, maybe 1999. He has never read 50 shades and he does not want to. He's heard enough through the grapevine. He sticks to his older pulp novels, and he has 0 shame about it too. Go on, ask him about the plot of the book he's reading. He'll tell you. In detail.

#reminds me how my grandma had literally over 1K of those little pulp romance novels in her house when she passed #bookshelves EVERYWHERE. FILLED WITH THEM. #we donated a full pickup truck load of them and i've still got 4 giant boxes of them in the shed out back #there was also bear shifter smut in there somewhere but i can't remember the title LMAO #i think she got it thrown in for free when she got a bundle of the other books cause it was definitely newer and not like the rest she had #a woman before her time grandma was #asked and answered #humanransome-note

[sysig]

Really digging out the old OCs now; Pan-na, Pilok, Azalea, squirrel boys Will and Damien, and Cupid and Venus <3 (Patreon)

#Doodles #Original #The Original Onslaught has begun >:) *stock maniacal laughter* #Lots of old faces! Lots of unfamiliar faces haha #You might actually recognize the last two individual boys as Blind Willie and Big Boy - those two I've Actually posted over here lol #The rest not so! Goshdang! I actually don't think I post Azalea much of anywhere lol like Maybe once on DA? Possibly? Heck #Same with Pan-na now that I think of it actually she's a Tomodachi Life-specific character haha #I had a few that despite not being fandom-tied I just can't get rid of to make room <3 They're residents! I'd miss them! #I really spoiled Pan-na - lots of cute clothes and a pretty room - so she gets special treatment in doodles too haha #Pilok was made while I was really into making original species on DA - anyone else here fill out the long development sheet? Fun stuff haha #I wish I'd finished a few more memes that got popular on DA back then ♪ Like the OC Remix! Very fun I made a rough of one years ago #Looking at Pilok now she kinda reminds me of the aliens from the DBZ special where Bardock gets sent to the past lol #Azalea was another random design that got a few doodles 'cause I thought she was edgy and cool haha #A more animalistic take on a stomachmouth - I don't think she can talk even she's just shaped like a humanoid maybe to blend in? Dunno #Oh looking back at my notes she was only supposed to have three fingers lol oh well #I don't think I ever drew her with her stomach open either but I'm pretty? sure I always imagined it being teeth-lined haha #Chomp #Squirrel boys! If you remember a few years ago I tried to draw Will again and was like ''>:?your face'' lol - I think I got it better now! #Still not 100% but better! He has very Shaped features haha #Big Boy turned out silly haha very one-large-anime-eyed - he deserves it lol #His hair falling over itself looked cool in my early doodles :0 Careful lines! Not so careful now lol #And Buzz is just missing haha #And finally Cupid and Venus <3 <3 I don't remember now but those two and their third girlfriend Spider might've been my first polycule? :0 #These two were a couple before inviting her in tho haha - there's a whole big backstory of how they met and all that #Venus was one of the main characters in Other Side of the Gun and then split off into her own side story with Cupid- It's a whole Thing #They're very sweet tho <3 I love them ♥ #Kinda seasonal for Cupid haha I didn't plan that! Her favourite holiday is Valentine's Day of course

[pekoeboo]

I don't want us to change, don't want us to chip away.... Could we stay in bloom?

Every time I listen to that song, it reminds me of how Aya views her relationship with Khalan. after some time - and especially after he starts showing signs of illness - Aya realizes that things are changing in their lives and doesn't want to accept those changes.

so she wants to hold onto the past; the way things were before - when their familial relationship only first started to blossom. when she wasn't afraid of what the future might hold or afraid of potentially losing Khalan. when things were fun and new and the responsibilities of growing older didn't weigh down so much on her.

I tried to portray that sort of 'moment of reflection' with this image, loosely basing it off of this particular entry in Khalan's Journal: a moment that's both serene and comforting, yet somber at the same time. but despite those complicated emotions that Aya is struggling to deal with, Khalan always does his best to give her the love and support that she needs to help her through it, as every good big brother should;;

gosh I love these two so, so much;; everything about them gets me right in the feels every time <3

Aya Armas belongs to @cookieg122. please do not remove caption or repost. also on deviantart

#oc #khalan al shariq #khalan #aya armas #cookieg122 #minecraft #primordial smp #i've been wanting to draw something like this for SO long #I need more big brother/dad khalan in my life honestly #and its just. it's so cute to me that he fills in both of those roles for aya #she still sees him as big bro but he's also practically raising her #even tho he is!!! quite young to be trying to raise a teenager lol #but he's doing his best and we love him for that;; #and even tho she teases him a lot for acting like a dad sometimes #aya genuinely appreciates him being there as a source of comfort and guidance;; she'd be so so lost in life without him honestly #ugh anyway i could go on but these tags are long enough dfjgnf #just had to get some of those Feelings out i guess haha

[insane-weasel]

I think as writers we should hold funerals for our WIPs more often.

Dearly beloved, gather us here today where this fic of some middle-aged man getting rawdogged and this other fanfic about the importance of friendship are laid to rest, because the author got really distracted playing that new video game.

We celebrate what could have been, cut-and-recycle those really good lines or ideas, because I swear I'm going to use them, I swear! And drag this poor document not to the great recycling bin or trash, but to the "graveyard" folder because sometimes I like to commune with the dead.

#fanfic #Writing #I just had to throw out 5k words of a one shot over something I can't change/control but I never delete old WIPs #I do just put them in a folder and still backup that folder with my other files #Yes some of my earlier ideas were horrendous but also there's a part of me still there in each of them #Sometimes it's less about the writing and more about who I was I want to sometimes revisit #Who was the teen girl writing gore at 15 and what would she think of today's writing #Who was the insecure fearful loveless boy who over expressed his masculinity online and wrote tough lonely guy characters #I don't want to be them anymore but when I hate myself sometimes it's nice to read what I've written #You hear the problems you never thought youd overcome in the author notes or in the subject and those fears and pain #You also see the first time you wrote a subject #I wish I hadn't deleted lots of my writing from when I was very young #Some I did because it legitimately could cause or encourage harm if left online #But I think I always smile when I see the old “this year is 8th grade” because by golly #Still think it's hilarious I got really into writing in middle school because I was jealous of someone else's writing ability in 6th grade #I can remember the exact moment I looked at my 2 page story and was filled with jealousy because they wrote 12 pages and my story felt so.. #I remember going home and going 'i know I can write something good!' and people will like it! #And then like while looking for some place to upload writing I found fanfic

[whentherewerebicycles]

question: when you're starting a new job, what do you most want out of your first week of onboarding? what's most helpful for you to know/understand upfront? also... what's not helpful? tell me your onboarding nightmare stories too lol

#i honestly do not ever think i've had a positive onboarding experience #in my entire professional life #i guess for me a lot of my early-job anxieties are around expectations and 'rules' #like i want to know what time i'm supposed to be there and what time i'm allowed to leave and what the dress code is #and how the hybrid schedule works #so i don't make dumb mistakes right away #i also think i want to be involved in the real work as early as possible #like i don't have to be DOING anything yet but i want to be watching people do things and shadowing in meetings #so i can start to develop a sense of who's who and what the actual work of the office/workplace looks like #and also because i really value getting a feel for personalities as early as possible lol i want to know what the vibes are #hmm and also maybe most importantly #i feel like in any new situation i need a very loose conceptual framework to hold the new information being given to me #otherwise it's just random pieces of info you know? like it's helpful when someone is actively helping me fit information into a frame #like they're saying 'here's the HUGE picture - now let's zoom in and start looking at this one corner of it - and as we add new corners #i'll actively help you fill in the connective tissue that holds these different parts of the big picture together' #hmmm #my worst onboarding experiences have been when the person training me comes in and throws lots of #long complex extremely context-dependent documents or readings at me #and is like ok spend the week reading those and get back to me #and i'm like ?????????? #i have NO understanding of what my role is or how this organization functions #at this point it is not helpful for me to pass my eyes over tons of dense info without a guide to tell me what's important #i have no way of gauging of something is important or trivial and then i feel stressed like i have to learn ALL of it #even though i know that a huge portion of it will end up being not that relevant to my day-to-day job

[the-casbah-way]

ok i'll bite because i'm getting so fucking insanely desperate here. what is a good way to gain weight fast (ish) that isn't just eating loads. i can't afford to eat loads or order takeout which is the whole problem. i have an insanely slow metabolism but it doesn't matter if i can't eat lots or even eat regularly at all because of time/financial constraints. i'm sick of being skinny and i'm also sick of my doctor pestering me about being underweight when i feel like i've tried everything and none of it's working. how the fuck do you gain weight when you don't have money

#i know i could try gainer shakes but i'm not really into that #because they're so filling that i would then eat LESS if i had those on top of it #or are you like. supposed to use the shakes as substitutes for meals ??? because that doesn't sound right #please help me nothing works i've been dealing with this my entire life and it's so fucking annoying

[unorcadox]

made a 7 part edit series tonight that'll probs just trickle out over the next few weeks, won't be labelled as a series, but consider this proof if you notice the pattern

edit: omgg for the first time in several months, i actually have a slight surplus in total edits. i've been scraping by for literally all of the summer, but maybe i can finally get a decent backlog again :D

#not edits #it's pretty obvious once you start looking for it but yeah #i wanna do some requests and use those to fill in the gaps in my schedule so hopefully i'll have some of those to share soon #i've had all the prompts sitting in my folder so patiently for me #will try to edit some tomorrow <3 #edit tags: i literally edited the one that came out yesterday that morning #i did the same for today's edit today #i generally try to keep a bit more ahead of them than this but like sometimes life is so funny #gonna try to harness the batch editing energy + new photo transfers from this time last year and see if i can get a ton of edits done

[fourteenthz]

this game gave me all the illness

Hundreds of thoughts abt the last two chapters of yakuza 0 over here you've been warned I'm going full essay post bc I just can't fit everything only in 30 tags:

I've just wanted to stress just how good I think this game is, genuinely. There are few things that irked me in the end but they are so irrelevant I can't mind all that much. The dialogue in this game is just wonderful, script goes out there a lot but the serious/emotional scenes just felt all so real to me. I feel like it's so hard doing real dialogue without it sounding predictable but they did it. Maybe it's because the story itself isn't all that predictable but just UGH WONDERFUL. so good. Anyway to story bits.

just to start where I left I have to say. proof of love? the damn chapter of all time. if you told me we would be here

when I first started play this game I would be very skeptical but I really loved the directiong they took with him. and specially with her. I just loved makoto at first sight and I hoped so bad she would continue to be a plot point from there on and to have her face all of dojima clan head on and survive is just. so damn cool. she is my most special girl.

and it makes her so realistic too to that final scene before credits. the way she stands up to those guys and everything about her development is just really perfect and insanely well done for like a side character, specially when we have so many of them in this game. she is wonderful. I adore her to bits.

plus as a side-story for majima slowly breaking away from that cold facade from the beginning is just REALLY nice. he starts this chapter makind expressions he has never once done before and ends like

CAN YOU HEAR ME? they are my everything. going from makoto saying "I'm sorry, I can't do anything for myself" right when majima had that talk with seda about not doing things by himself. I love this plot point of him and kiryu being so damn powerful but how shaping them for something greater they needed others. not in a way that they lack something but in such there-are-thing-not-even-you-can-scape kind of way. this brings me to THIS:

BECAUSE THEY MAKE ME SO UNWELL. I feel sick. every time I have favorites I expect the worst to happen to them (because it always happens lol) but having nishiki and makoto being pillars for kiryu's and majima's resolve until the very end is SUCH a treat.

one moment you think they are all dying and the other you get this:

and it changes you for life I guess.

I should also add how much I love lao gui as majima's last boss for this game vs kiryu and shibusawa. they really delivered perfectly the whole "this is what you can become if you follow through with it" and it just makes. sense. and makes me stupid ig. I like them a normal amount and also I like how nishiki and makoto (even not there) are the ones that remind them of who they want to become. it's different from where they are now but it's different from the person lying under them as well and I just feel SO NORMAL about that.

for the ending I gotta say, majima's left a bad taste in my mouth at first, maybe because I just hated sagawa so bad lmao but I think I'm coming around it a lot more the more I think of it. and welp ig sagawa is dead so I that's a good way as any to convince me.

after makoto was gone I kind expected him to never talk with her again, but just to add, it feels better than I overall was hoping. I thought she would either die or move away from japan and they would never see it other again. Don't get me wrong I have no expectations for her to show up again, but just by her being there, I feel like it gives him a lot of peace of mind tbh. dojima clan won't follow here anymore and he can make sure of that. sounds good to me. bUT DID YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME THIS?

SEDA COWARDS. I was partially hoping he would keep it but this is better. ye. I just ADORE this so much. It is such pain that she doesn't know his name but also I just feel so relieved when she was just. walking around. being normal. I love her I love her she deserves the entire world I'm so happy at this moment.

now you know what made me insane? going from this

to THIS

and then I went to download the next one and you know what fck you seda I HATE THIS SO MUCH.

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN.

I mean I think I know but I REALLY thought I was free from tragic brothers. what about ranking up together..... what of their promise? what about "until death do us apart" was THAT A LIE? I'm gonna be honest with you all. I was excited to continue today but after seeing the opening for kiwami I REALLY don't want to. but. whatever.

from what I'm certain and I know it to be true besides mine own speculation:

I like...... this game. I like how kiryu kept his idea of choosing his path by whether he loved-or-hated it. I love how he steadily grows so much over the game and how you can't really notice until he has to make a choice and you see he's still thinks the same but acts just so more maturely. I like how he let his relationships influence him, how it isn't seem as a bad thing ever, how he is always being rewarded for it.

I like how this reflects on loyalty and brotherhod by everybody that is around him, specially nishiki. damn if I know wtf is happening on the next game but the "95 was a dark year, while kiryu serves time in jail, nishikiyama becomes a changed man" just proves that. I like how they try to be away from one another but when nishiki said they are invincible together, he was right. They don't have to be invincible all the time, but it must feel good to. and them choosing to accept the other changing in that ending scene at serena and nothing changing between them UP UNTIL they are separeted in 95' just feels right.

and, all that being said, I like how it all changed made majima into whatever is that guy by the end of yakuza 0. I somehow felt like he needed one more cutscene, specially bc the next games are really focused on kiryu, but even then, it all just fits well. his acceptance now isn't like the one in chapter 15, when he just comppels in being a pawn for sagawa or whatever. it genuinely speaks to the very first time we see him, how he knows nothing but yakuza, how it's his life, and now WELL IT ISN'T THE PERFECT ENDING but it's such a well-written one for someone such as him. he get's to keep doing what he knows, but being just so much cooler and confident about it. IT JUST FEELS. DAMN COOL.

Just overall. The story is so good, the gameplay is so good. I have a handful of poorly done mechanics/writting to point out but the good outweights the bad so hard that I just doesn't feel like it matter at all. The combat is so fun, the mini-games are intuitive and the side-stories are just gold. Having the switch between the two of them made the game just so fun, there is a bunch of stuff I didn't finish but I also didn't felt bored not even for a second. It's honestly such rewarding gaming experience and I love those a lot.

so yeah, I'll stop rambling now or whatever but just. yeah. yakuza 0 good. play it. pls. and talk to me about it. pls. ty.

#trying to act so normal on this damn essay i'm sorry you must know I was actually barking at my monitor once the end screen appeared #yakuza 0 #yakuza 0 spoilers #kelly plays ykz #there must be SO MANY typos here but idk I just needed to put my thoughts somewhere and kinda organized so I can go insane in the tags bc #GOD AJJAAJSUDGDSD BITTING MY FISTS BANGING MY HEAD ON THE WALL ETC ETC ETC #seda for everything that exists please I said I wanted more or my tragic brother but NOT LIKE THAT I HATE the opening for ykz 1 so much #WDYM NISHIKI NOT HUGGING KIRYU BUT FIGHTING......... WDYM. #I'm sorry if my blog turns into ykz filled the next days I've been really into giffing again and I feel ill about those characters #and now that I know the majima short hair is in all of the next games I can easily just gif ykz 0 with the idea I had so yeah. #brace yourselves or whatever. I like men a normal amount. #seeing kiryu's back on the title screen tho......... I bet nishiki colored his too..... man.... I'm normal abt thm. #I feel like playing every ykz at this point even after seeing many ppl say that you don't really have to specially 3/4 but idk. kinda #started this series really easily in a 'i'll play when I feel like it' kind of way which isn't how I approach most series #maybe I'm just used to final fantasy lol but the game is just so packed with stuff and it also have such good breaks in the main story #that it makes so much easier to take a break from it irl. genuinely such a well developed game. I'll not stop saying this lol it just. is. #can't believe i'm saying fucking “yakuza 0” when someone asks me what game I recommend them. who would've fucking thought honestly. #the day I bought the idea of trusting this game to have good written tragic brothers and started playing was a damn good choice. #i'm in too deep now. it really is one of those games that makes me emo about how video games are the superior form of story telling #anyway I miss my boys. I'll need some encouragment to keep going with the next entry but i'll so it at some point #until them please enjoy every gifset I send in you guys' way *praying emoji* #can't wait to really meet ichiban by myself!!!!!! lets go!!!! #kelly says

[flowered-mp3]

#hi guys... i know that i havent been the most active lately... mostly because work is hectic right now and all my free time is spent with #family friends and my bf #to be honest i don't know if i'll return to writing... I've slowly been losing motivation but it really is a shame #i've loved my time here and i don't know where my journey will go next #but i will keep my blog up for now and reblog stuff occasionally. #honestly it seems that since full time work and bf got combined I've had less and less time! its just a part of life #and i'm incredibly grateful for those who gave me advice durinf my online dating era... it all led up to my life right now and i couldn’t #be happier. sure our relationship isn't perfect and he isn’t but i truly feel that he's perfect for me. i'm the happiest that i've even been #and i'm thankful for u all that commented on my shitposts and talked me through it all. it got me through and even my bf thanks u all for #getting me through it as well :) #idk why i feel so sappy right now but i'm just feeling grateful. #and happy hehe. my bf met one of my oldest friends from my hometown and he just. idk. after we drove back he told me that he realized that #he's v protective of me when he's walking dt with me lol (it's filled with very strange people that yell) and i could tell lowkey because #his hand would squeeze mine and he would pull me toward him or beside or infront when we talked past sus people #and idk he was looking at me a certain way and i was like stop looking at me (he was gonna make me blush lol) but he just said 'why am i not #allowed to look at my future wife' ! #and u guys i wanted to SCREAM like... wow my bf lowkey has rizz tf lol #idk i'm happy 😊 thats the life update see u guys sometimes :) #e.txt

[fumiko-matsubara]

A Timeline of the whole messy Kaho + Maehara + Seo situation

Just trying to make sense of what was shown and hinted in the manga.

Because Class E students typically don’t graduate by the end of the school year, they are officially expelled from Kunugigaoka by the 3rd Trimester (Jan-Mar), which is all about high school exams preparations. The Class E building will then instead be occupied by the future Class E students for accommodation purposes.

The sorting for future Class E students among the 2nd years will likely occur a little after the announcements of their final exam results, which was in December.

Which means that Kaho and Maehara likely dated before December 2013.

Maehara basically ghosted Kaho ever since dropping to Class E.

Maybe until somewhere in May 2014.

And within those 5 months of ghosting, he probably even dated a bunch of girls behind her back. It explains why Nagisa described Maehara as someone who is so popular that the girl he’s seen with constantly changes.

He cheated on her 4 times the whole time they’ve been apart.

And it also explains why nobody was under the impression that he and Kaho have been dating for a long time, even though Maehara is notorious for his extensive dating history.

Hell, I’m sure that people barely even knew that they dated, or that they had already forgotten that they were dating by the time the new school year began.

Enter Seo, the new guy in the situation.

Who is also unaware of Maehara’s relationship with Kaho for some strange reason despite having a whole wide network of people to tell him what’s going on.

Horrible temper, verbally abusive, incredibly rude, and his appearance couldn’t even make it up for his horrible personality - not a single box was checked in Kaho’s criteria for the kind of guys she’s famously into (Ikemen).

So, no fucking way would she date him.

But, here’s the catch: Seo is a virtuoso - his incredibly high social standing in Kunigigaoka’s student hierarchy despite his horrible personality canonically makes everyone uncomfortable.

And Kaho is just another student from the most average class in their year.

But she’s incredibly pretty.

It could be to make himself look good in front of others for having a beautiful girlfriend or whatever. Regardless of what Seo’s reasons are for dating her, the extreme power imbalance between the two of them gives Kaho no choice but to date him at his demand.

This could have happened in April 2014, when the new school year solidifies Seo’s standing as among the virtuosos.

Fast forward.

It was in June 2014 when some of the current Class E students spotted Kaho and Maehara walking together under the rain.

That makes it more than 6-7 months of dating.

And yet, for some strange reason, none of the present Class E students where under the impression that they were dating for a long time. In fact, Kaho was made seem to be a new girlfriend of Maehara’s instead.

Which could mean that Maehara waltzed back into Kaho’s life fairly recently.

I’m just gonna assume it’s somewhere between late May to early June.

The 5th time he cheated on her, was when he scheduled that date with a girl from another school, when they are actively dating.

Because there is no other way he could schedule a new date that quick right after Kaho officially broke up with him, when preparations still had to be made for Class E to execute their revenge plan.

And he looked guilty as fuck.

Kaho and Seo most likely broke up after fighting over who gets to use the bathroom in the convenience store.

As shown in the baseball arc, Kaho openly hates him to the bone.

Since then, she has been actively going after other boys she finds cool.

Then summer came.

According to Gakushuu, if Class A had won the bet against Class E, a truth that Maehara specifically isn’t allowed to lie about when asked was the fact that he had been cheating FIVE TIMES.

(I used a raw scan I have saved in my gallery, because the two available English scanlations online translated that question in such a vague way you wouldn't have caught it - how many times you've "lied/been distracted" - when the first two characters here 浮気 translates to anything that literally means "cheating (in a relationship)").

Meaning, by the time summer came, not even Kaho knew about this.

Note: There's a chance that the amount of times Maehara had cheated in a relationship isn't actually exclusive to just Kaho herself and it might just be in general.

But the way that the people around them were seemingly under the impression that Kaho is a more recent girlfriend of Maehara's, when they've been actually dating for half a year, just solidifies the theory that he had been seeing other girls behind her back all this time.

But whether that theory is correct or not, it doesn't change the solid fact that he still cheated on her at least once, which was when he already had that other date scheduled.

This arc... pisses me off. I know I've said that many times already. And I will still say it.

What initially seemed to be an arc about Maehara's early character development because he was the focus here... ended up blatantly showing how much of a hypocritical trashy guy he instead actually is.

Because how shameless are you to be going around cheating left and right without any regard for your current girlfriend's feelings, but the second you're on the receiving end of a cheating matter, you didn't even hesitate to expose her just so you wouldn't get the blame?

And for that alone, Kaho throwing him under the bus right after was honestly DESERVED.

I would have found this arc less pointless if the deleted Valentine's arc with Okano was instead the follow up, where Koro finally gave Maehara a piece of his mind about this whole non regard for a girl's feelings after realizing that the kid learned absolutely nothing from the situation with Kaho.

None of that whole bullshit about being completely transparent in Maehara's report card just to motivate him to do something. I just want Maehara to set things right with Okano on his own accord. No outside influences or whatsoever. Because that report card threat just made everything seem not genuine and it would really hurt to be Okano in that situation.

I don't mind the retaliation arc being left unchanged if it was instead used as a motivation to set things right in the future.

#and that covers everything I think about the Retaliation arc so far #if I had more to say about it in the future #it's probably me realizing some things I haven't caught yet as I'm writing this #so if anything i said here debunks the things I've said back then when I tried filling in the blanks #it's because I hadn't noticed those things before #but now i do #and so I made this timeline for my own future reference #assassination classroom #ansatsu kyoushitsu #assclass #analysis #assclass salt #maehara hiroto #tsuchiya kaho #tomoya seo