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strayflowersstarsandlove · 2 months

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𝙴𝚢𝚎𝚜 𝚆𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚜𝚑𝚞𝚝 - a Han Jisung short au!fanfic

PART 6

💫PART 7💫

Another sleepless night. Another day. Another bleary morning where you slip into your routine. Go to work, come back home, heat up some ultra processed canned meal, another groundhog day feeling like a crazy person over the radio silence on Han's side.

It's 6.30 pm and you're restless. You barely pick at the spaghetti in your bowl and dial up the same number once again, it goes to voicemail, predictably. Shit. Fuck. You groan and spring to your feet.

This has to end, you can't go on like this. It's not something you've ever thought you'd ever do but here you are, turning on the ignition and speeding down the road, headed to Han's apartment. He has to talk to you. He has to face this. Your heart needs to be put to a rest or else you're going to implode.

You spend the whole 35 minuets drive mentally preparing for the moment you'll see him, going over and over your speech as it frantically forms in your head with every mile you drive. As soon as you pull up to his driveway your mouth goes dry. Every single thought in your head disappears and you're just climbing out of your car and waking up to his door by pure inertia, your brain empty, your instincts kicking in, driven by mere impulsiveness.

You ring the bell a few times, impatiently knock on his door as well, silently praying no other resident will walk up on you looking like a dishevelled lunatic who didn't even bother changing out of her fuzzy pink sweats and battered Uggs boots. No answer. You helplessly look around the hallway. Looking for God knows what kind of signal he might have left.

For all you know he might be hiding inside, refusing to acknowledge you cause he's being a coward. "Han Jisung please open this fucking door", you exclaim once, frustratedly knocking a few more times, to no avail. You try to press your ear to the hard, reinforced surface of the door, trying to listen to any noise that might be coming from the inside. But you hear nothing.

Eyeing the little pass code activated electronic lock on the side, the wild, deranged thought of punching in a random code flashes in your mind but you immediately hold yourself back from even trying to hover your hand above the touch pad.

An old lady with a lovely bouquet of pink flowers and a white crocheted cat shaped bag walks past you, she smiles politely at you and greets you briefly, and you try your best to look casual, bowing slightly to her in greeting, "are you waiting for your friend, darling?", she asks curiously, stopping before her door, "y-yeah, he lives here, we were supposed to meet a few minutes ago but I guess he might be... napping?", you blurt out, a deep shaded of pink creeping up your cheeks.

The nice lady purses her lips and taps her chin cutely, lively eyes lighting up in realisation once she gives the door to Han's apartment a quick glance over," ah! The nice young man with the the bright smile! What a lovely boy he is, I think he left a few days ago with another handsome fellow, he had a little packet of cat food with him, he even gave it to my little darling, Mee", she elaborates, opening the door to her apartment, a white fluffy cat with green eyes peeking out from the door frame.

You weren't going to get a speeding ticket on a regular thursday night but your foot did push down dangerously hard onto your gas pedal more than once. Minho didn't even live that far from Han but the urge you felt rushing through your veins made you drive there almost too exceedingly fast.

With sweaty palms and wobbly legs, you climb out of the car and walk up to the doorbell, ringing twice: this is the moment, you think. Here goes nothing, he's either going to yell at you for basically stalking him or break down into tears cause he realised he missed you. Though that might just be your sleep deprived brain talking.

Minho curses under his breath and scrambles to the door, his face falling the second he sees you standing there behind the gate, eyes bloodshot and watery, your whole demeanor so subdued and miserable: "y/n? What are you doing here?", he doesn't wait for your answer, instead he just opens the gate with a click of a button on his front door video intercom and then quickly walks up to you.

It's not properly disappointment the emotion you're feeling right now but it's still somewhat resembling the feeling of being let down, even though you know you did it all on yourself, this isn't a movie or a novel, happy endings just don't write themselves like that.

Minho approaches you cautiously, concern written all over his face, big eyes poring into yours as he nears your trembling body: "is he here? Please tell me he's here and he's okay", is all you can say before the floodgates open and you're overcome with rugged breaths and loud cries.

The dark haired boy hesitates, he reaches out to pat your hair gently, his voice soft and whispery, "it's alright, y/n, it's alright", he coos, "he is here. He's basically been camping here for the past week and a half. He's sleeping right now. I can't even access my own bed room cause he moved himself in there and won't get out", he tries, slipping a soft giggle in his words.

Meager relief, at least you know he's not completely shutting everyone out. You knew Han well enough to know he knew how to keep a grudge when upset but mostly, you knew he sometimes despised his head enough to get lost in it and let it swallow him up to the point where he didn't let anyone in.

Minho's perceptiveness pleasantly surprises you when he motions for you to give him a little side hug, like he knew you needed that, even though he's not that into physical closeness like that, "I've been looking after him, he's eating his meals and getting all the sleep. I know you're wondering if he's beating himself up over what he did: he is. He hasn't been very kind to himself, I'm sure if he feels bad you must feel ten times worse. For what is worth, I'm sorry, little one", he says calmly, using his fingers to dab away at tears still pooling in the corners of your eyes.

You nod quietly and sniffle, "I-thank you. He-he's been ignoring me for days I thought he was... I thought he was mad at me and mad at himself and maybe not doing so good and I'm-I'm going insane, Min. I need him. I need to talk to him and I need to talk to Felix and I can't do either and it feels like I'm loosing it", you ramble, feeling the sting of the fresh unshed tears beading beneath your lashes.

Minho nods in understanding and pats your head, "he's not mad at you. He never was. You know how he can be sometimes, a little too impulsive. He's been agonizing over you for so long he just combusted that night. I might have suggested to him to act fast if he cared enough about you and about his sanity the most, I had no idea he would straight up confess and break the news over Yongbokie, that wasn't his place to do that, but I believe he did so cause he's genuinely, madly in love with you, he was really on his last resort".

He's is in love with you. It's not even the first time you hear that, Han said it himself. Yet the weight of those words still crushes your soul in the best way possible. It makes your heart pound so hard in your chest it physically hurts. What about Felix though. His spirit would certainly be destroyed if he knew about any of this.

You ponder on your words for a second, your eyes focusing in the distance first, on the bedroom window in the front part of the house where you know Han is sleeping. "I feel like... I feel like I've been blind this whole time, and now there's too many colors and the lights are too bright and I can't see clear. I want to say I'm in love with him too, but I can't shake the heaviness from my heart, cause Felix is my best friend... no offense", "none taken", Minho chuckles, rubbing your arm slightly.

"You'll be okay, you'll figure it out. If the both of your are serious enough about your feelings for each other and the mutual respect for our blue haired angel, you'll find a way to coexist with that heaviness. But you need to face it together".

A few more days go by. They all kind of merge one into another. You try to send Felix funny memes and have basic conversations here and there but it feels like play pretend all the while. You're sure he can tell you're not being 100% yourself, even more so when texts start popping up in your group chat with the boys and you never reply.

When Chan suggest you all meet for drinks one night, you quickly make up some excuse about being sick and turn off your phone, not before seeing the chat fill up with hearts and get well soon wishes which only make you cry cause you miss your friends and you wish you could turn back time and remain blissfully ignorant and enjoy your time with them without worrying about either breaking your own heart or Felix's. Or both.

It's past 9pm already and with no plans for your Friday night beside wallowing in your own pity party, you jump into a scalding hot shower, making sure you're blasting your music as loud as possible, hoping the steam from the hot water and the songs on your playlist will drown out your intermittent crying.

You don't necessarily feel better once you step out but clean hair and a lotioned up, hydrated body do feel like a little treat despite the mental state you're in. You throw on a black tank top and some shorts and gather up the used towels and laundry, your hair still damp and falling into your face when you have to bend down to pick up a sock that fell out of your dirty laundry pile.

And then the door bell rings. And you hit your head on the side of the sink from the jolt. Shit. Grumbling and pressing your hand on the back of your head, you quickly run downstairs, the door bell still ringing and ringing. Exasperated and annoyed by your clumsiness, you thrust the door open without even checking the peephole first.

🥀PART 8

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odiesbun · 1 year

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...♡You are the author of the book...♡

There may be errors in the text, as my native language is not English. Thank you for your likes!

genre: fluff.

warning: established relationships, food references, guys are proud of you, some misunderstandings with Seungmin, work, writing, books.

w.c: 2.3k

a.n: If my parents and in-laws were as proud of my writing as the Stray Kids in this chapter, I'd be over the moon.

♡Chan♡

Your number one biggest and most loyal fan is Chan. But he's also the spreader of new news about your books, including he's also your manager and salesman.

- „Oh, yes. The new chapter is coming out this Friday.“ - You were walking past your living room when you heard Chan proudly telling the boys about your book. No doubt they admired your work as much and were just as eagerly awaiting it.

- „Oh, I can't wait any longer!“ - Han cried out loudly, clinging to the armrest of the sofa. Everyone laughed and nodded positively.

- „By the way, do you happen to have two extra copies of the first part? I'd like to give them to my sisters, they like that genre very much.“ - Felix moved closer to Chan. Chan seeing that you were already standing under the door eavesdropping on them, turned to the door with a smirk.

- „I'm kind of a manager and salesman, but check with the author of the job for any questions.“ - Your cheeks instantly puffed up and you lowered your gaze bashfully to the floor, stepping over the threshold and entering the living room as if nothing had happened.

- „Do you need something from me?“ - You smiled innocently. The boys' glances of amazement turned to you, begging or praising you for a new spoiler.

- „Ah, yes. Felix wanted to ask you something...“ - Chan muttered, jokingly nudging you with his elbow in the middle of the room, so that you not only solve the question about the two copies, but also tell additional facts about your book, which will only fuel interest.

He's very proud of his girl. So soon the guys won't let him in their dorm because he either does nothing but talk about your new book or starts giving spoilers relentlessly, which many people don't like.

♡Minho♡

Minho has several stacks of your books laid out on a small folding table, setting it right in the middle of the street. There were always a lot of people coming to the spring fair, so Lee Know thought it was a great chance to sell some second pieces of your books. People were excited about it, and copies were flying around almost every minute.

- „Oh, guys!“ - Jisung and Jeongin, who were passing in the crowd, waved and slowly walked over to you. Noticing the second part, I.N instantly grabbed the penultimate book, holding it tightly to his chest and clearly not intending to give it back.

- „You, too? Damn, why is everyone always talking about this book? Am I the only one who hasn't read it?“ - Jisung frowned, turning to look at you. Minho hummed, shoving the earlier part into his friend's hands.

- „Read it. It's good for you.“ - Minho nodded his head, accepting the money from Jeongin before returning to his seat and continuing to speak. - „Especially since my girlfriend is the author of these books.“

Jeongin and Jisung looked at each other in surprise. Yang, with a shy smile, held out to you his packaged book he had just paid for and the black pen he had in his belt pouch pocket.

- „Would you please sign my book? It's an honor to know you not only as a beloved author, but as a friend...“ - Jeongin whispered, shyly lowering his gaze and hiding it under his lashes. You smiled, squinting and accepting your book pen.

Minho raised his eyebrows, smiling. A glint of pride glittered in his eyes, for he, too, was involved in the creation of your first and second books.

- „Of course, here.“ - You quickly signed in the corner of the book, then handed it to a happy Jeongin. The boys said goodbye and thanked you before walking off into the depths of the fair.

- „Wow, baby. You got your first autograph!“ - Minho chuckled with delight. He rubbed his hands to his sides as he continued. - „Soon you'll be hosting your own fan meetings.“

- „Yeah, and then we'll make a collab and we'll be world stars.“ - You hum, smiling. Minho's heart skipped a beat at your sweet smile.

- „Great idea, let's do that.“ - Minho nodded, squinting against the sun.

♡Changbin♡

With delight in his eyes and a sly squint, Changbin leaned closer to you, softly touching your cheek with his lips. You giggled, arching an eyebrow as if silently asking what Changbin was up to this time.

- „I got in touch with a big writing agency...“ - From afar, he began, wistfully sweeping his eyes around the room, and then taking a couple of steps forward and sinking into a chair, continuing. - „And... They're very interested in you and your work that I sent them in an e-mail.“

You gasped. Your eyes widened in amazement, and your heart began to pound with redoubled force. You were a little flattered that Changbin had done this for you.

- „What kind of work did you send them?“ - You smiled, twiddling your thumbs nervously.

- „The last three you've released to the general public at the moment. And another one of your old drafts.“ - Changbin smiled, averting his gaze awkwardly. Perhaps the fact that he sent away your unfinished work wasn't right, not only to the agency but to you, but the managers were delighted with it.

- „Okay, and?“ - You nodded, fixing your hair and waiting for the end result. Changbin took a deep breath.

- „And they asked that you come in for an interview the day after tomorrow.“ - Quickly he blurted out, gathering air into his lungs again and continuing. - „What they are interested in at the moment, they clarified in an email. So I'm going to help you prepare.“

Changbin put his arm around your shoulders encouragingly, and then gently stroked your hands, as if to soothe you. His gaze fell on several books of your authorship that were on the middle shelf in the closet.

- „You will succeed, I believe in you.“ - He whispered.

♡Hyunjin♡

Finally, after so many days and months of agony and suffering over the book, it was ready. You leaned back in your chair with a sigh, watching Hyunjin place a cup of tea right next to the keyboard.

- „Congratulations on a job well done.“ - He smiled. He had the same cup of tea in his hands, and he pulled another chair closer to you and sat down next to it. You thanked the guy.

- „By the way, I wanted to offer you something...“ - Hyunjin pursed his lips and took a sip of his tea. You looked at him questioningly. - „How would you like it if I drew the covers of your books?“

Your eyes widened in surprise, and you almost choked on your drink. You opened your mouth in mute surprise, not even finding the words to say.

- „Thank you so much, Hyunnie. But you've got your hands full as it is, and I don't want to burden you any further...“ - You smiled, dropping your gaze into your cup. Hyunjin chuckled as his dog stepped closer to him, then harnessed to his lap.

- „It won't be much work for me. I like to paint and I like to help you.“ - He explained, propping his cheek with his hand, reasoning. - „Besides, your work is of excellent quality. If you really want to get international recognition, you have to have a good cover. People pay attention to a pretty picture first.“

Of course you said yes. Not many people would refuse that offer, especially since Hyunjin has very good drawing skills, which he's working hard to develop.

***

A few weeks later, you held up your book with the cover that Hengjin had drawn and made himself. You looked at the book enthusiastically from every angle, not believing that Hwang really did it.

- „Do you like it?“ - Hyunjin smiled hopefully, clasping his hands behind his back. You nodded vigorously, turning your face toward him.

- „It's the best thing I've ever seen in my life. Thank you so much, Hyunjin.“

♡Han♡

Han couldn't believe until the very end that you were the author of his favorite work. At some points he saw similarities between you and your writing personality, but he literally couldn't believe it.

It wasn't until he saw an open draft of the sequel to your first book on your computer desktop. Jisung ran his eyes cursorily over the text as his text slowly reached his understanding of the whole situation and his pupils enlarged lovingly. You leaned against the doorjamb, wrapping yourself in plaid and humming.

- „Why didn't you tell me before that my favorite author I've told you so much about is you?“ - Han slowly turned his head in your direction. He darted quickly toward you, placing his hands on your shoulders.

- „I thought it would seem too obvious to you... Especially since I wasn't ready to talk about it with just one book out.“ - You shrugged, smiling. You really weren't quite sure that Jisung REALLY liked your work.

- „At some point, I really started to guess that it was you...“ - Jisung took a deep breath, averting his eyes. His heart was jumping out of his chest, and his hands were shaking with joy and excitement. - „But I didn't think my idol really lived in the same house as me.“

You slumped back in your chair, turning to face the laptop. Your fingers scribbled on the keyboard again, and Han stood beside you, watching meekly until you broke the silence again.

- „Would you like me to tell you another interesting fact?“ - You squinted slyly. Jisung was silent for a few seconds, and then he nodded his head vigorously.

- „The main character was based on you.“ - Jisung's eyes doubled after your statement and his eyebrows went up. You continued. - „I spent a long time studying you and your psychology, and I ended up with this.“

Han opened his mouth and then theatrically put his hand to his heart and leaned the other against his forehead.

- „Ah, this girl is the love of my life and my dream! How do I give you an Academy Award for the best role of my life?“

♡Felix♡

Your new book was a bestseller in almost every country in the world, so you and Felix were a little shocked that your fame came so suddenly fast.

- „I can't believe my book's hashtag still hangs at the top of most social media...“ - You blinked your eyes twice in surprise, staring at your smartphone screen. Felix smiled, nodding.

- „By the way, Chan was already asking when the second part would come out.“ - He chuckled, remembering his enthusiastic friend who kept saying the same thing this morning.

- „If I release another part, is there any chance I'll start getting recognized on the street like you?“ - You smiled, resting your chin on the armrest of the couch and stretching out. Felix thought for a moment, then squinted and smiled, patting your hair.

- „Sure. We'll be a famous couple. I'm an idol, you're an author. We were made for each other! It's all fate, Y/n!“ - He spluttered his arms, slumping back in his chair. Felix immediately became confused, telling you about his plans for your next five or even ten years of relationship.

Of course, Felix is very happy for you. But he's also very proud and pleased that you had such a high-profile start to your first book. He considers you his little star, which at the moment shines not only for him, but for others the brightest.

Maybe to help you with money and popularity in the same way, he will promote these books to fans(and maybe even sell some exclusive copies himself to band members or other idols/interns in their company).

♡Seungmin♡

Seungmin had known about your hobby for a long, long time, but he obviously didn't expect the main character in your book to have the first and last name «Kim Seungmin».

- „Is that a coincidence?“ - Kim arched a questioning eyebrow as you sat in the kitchen at breakfast. He took a sip of his coffee, staring at you.

- „What? What do you mean?“ - You raised your eyebrows, and then moved them to the bridge of your nose in a grimace of misunderstanding.

- „I read a new chapter in the book while you were asleep...“ - He began thoughtfully, looking down at his half-empty plate and biting his lips nervously. - „And I'm not quite sure why the main character ended up being named Kim Seungmin? Is it a coincidence or did you brazenly copy my name?“

You laughed as you watched how serious Seungmin was about the main character's name situation. He looked incredibly cute when he didn't understand or was outraged.

- „It's just a joke, Seungmin. My friend just joked that it would be cool to create a fanfic with her boyfriend, which is why this book was originally something of a romance fanfic. I really did put your name in the draft“ - You explained. Seungmin listened with seriousness, not daring to interrupt and absorbing every word like a sponge. - „And I had planned to change the main character's name later. But everyone said the name was super appropriate, so I decided to leave it as is.“

You shrugged, popping a small bite of food into your mouth. After a long silence, Seungmin finally got up to put the plate in the dishwasher.

- „Great.“ - He said, setting at the door and throwing a glance at you over his shoulder. - „But it's just unimaginable. I mean, it's literally a fanfic about you and me?“

You laughed again, covering your face with your hands.

- „Seungmin! It's just a book on the internet, don't take it too seriously!“ - Seungmin just fake-rolled his eyes at your laughter and tsked.

- „I was expecting anything but this...“ - He said before finally leaving the kitchen.

Lol, he's actually really pleased and proud that you named your main character after Seungmin.

♡Jeongin♡

Jeongin quickly ran his eyes over your text that you were about to publish. He squinted his eyes, his pupils enlarging slightly as a light bulb went on above his head and he looked up at you.

- „You!“ - He exclaimed enthusiastically, poking you with a sheet of text. You drew back reflexively, batting your eyes in surprise. - „It was you!“

You arched your eyebrows in bewilderment, completely unaware of what he was talking about.

- „What are you talking about, I.Nnie?“

- „The girl who won first place in our school's writing contest...“ - He began, his smile slowly spreading across his face. Understanding instantly struck you and you looked away bashfully, nodding. Jeongin continued to speak. - „I was fascinated by your work... And I was the secret buyer who emailed you and bought all the original books...“

Your eyes flew open. You quickly grabbed I.N's cheeks, pulling his face closer to yours.

- „So you were my savior!? Ah, damn, then I thought God had decided to take pity on me...“ - You exhaled, smiling. Your hands were shaking from too much emotion, so Jeongin gently took hold of your palms, intertwining your fingers.

- „The style of your work is unique... I'm very glad you didn't end your career as a writer... Because I was so upset when you stopped writing after graduation...“ - Jeongin raised his glistening eyes to you, gently smacking you on the forehead.

- „I didn't stop writing. I just changed my pen name and created another account to publish my work.“ - You shrugged, chuckling.

You stood in silence for a while, hugging and kissing, until your boyfriend started talking about your writing again.

- „You know, I didn't believe in the theory that people can meet their destiny at least three times in their lives... Well, with you I'm willing to believe anything.“ - Yang smirked before kissing you on the corner of your lips.

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