#idfk know. like me? actually want to be around me or spend time with me??

[honorthysalad]

I'm too tired for a proper introduction. I don't like yoshiki's dad and how he's being portrayed in the manga.

Before ch25, the most we see of yoshiki's dad is from the hgsn light novel’s bonus chapter, wherein we get a lot of focus on the disparity between parental roles and how mothers are expected to care solely for the children while fathers are expected to work for the family. Like that's the problem with their relationship: Yoshiki’s mom wants her husband to *care* about their kids and Yoshiki’s father thinks that solely because he’s their father that the amount of care he’s showing (almost none) is acceptable. She goes up to him, asks if he thinks it's okay that Kaoru isn't going to school, and he just further pushes the responsibility onto her by telling her that surely as Kaoru’s mother she knows best. She presses more for his opinion, and he continues to refuse to think about it, becoming frustrated when she pushes back to the point that when the argument is done he’s hitting tables and slamming doors like a child because talking to his wife 'annoys' him so much.

And the thing is that Yoshiki's mom still currently works. She has a job and is expected to do all the housework and decision making for the kids on top of that, and Yoshiki's dad is the one who is stubbornly clinging to these typical roles because it's upsetting for him when it's pointed out that he's failing as a parent. His wife is practically begging him to care, and he just refuses.

(And it makes sense the disparity gets focused on here because Len didn’t write it.)

ANYWAY, looking at this, it makes perfect sense why Yoshiki doesn't want to talk to his dad. His dad doesn't want to talk to him, slams doors when he gets confronted with the idea he may have to *think* about his kids, and so, if Yoshiki's dad wants to be absent from Yoshiki's life, Yoshiki wants him to be absent too- in all forms. From the moles he's inherited to the supposed similarities between them, Yoshiki wants nothing to do with him.

(There's a misconception going around that Yoshiki's dad beats him. This is from a mistranslation of the light novel; Yoshiki's dad only hits objects. Feel free to write him however you want tho, I know I hardly stick to canon lol. I just wanted to preemptively avoid ppl informing me of that)

But if you’ve only read the manga, then why doesn’t Yoshiki like his father? He… knocked over a glass once maybe? Looked real pathetic getting yelled at? Grabbed Yoshiki’s arm and said some vague stuff about the unuki. In the past people told Yoshiki he was like him. That's what we got of Yoshiki's dad before ch25.

Then in ch25, Yoshiki's dad is some like... idfk? Pathetic little guy who wants to spend time with his family but he doesn't feel like he has a place to belong in the house :( I mean sure he's clearly in the house at a normal time when everyone else is in the house so it's not like he's working insane hours and can never see them, but didn't you know he's so scared of his wife :(((( and look he's actually not a bad parent cuz one time he read Yoshiki a book, and he's got an artistic side cuz he wanted to be a novelist, and he's such a funny little clumsy guy :) also he's got himself a little family tree with daddy issues of his own :))

I'd almost entertain that this is him putting up an act around yoshiki like yoshiki's mom says, but it's pretty unlikely from what we see of him in extras. Len wants us to see him as a person who just struggles to assert himself and that's what causing the breakdown of the family, not what the light novel presents where he asserts himself with his actions, and what he's saying he doesn't care about the family.

It's just kind of frustrating because I liked the examination in the light novel, highlighting the flaws in what’s assumed as a normal family dynamic in Japan, and I think it perfectly fits the themes HGSN explores with maintaining flawed traditions that only work on the surface. In turn what we’ve got in the manga is just… muddled and weird.

#I just really don’t feel that these two different versions line up #like I feel like light novel dad would’ve refused to answer Yoshiki and walked out of the room to avoid the conversation #Prompting Yoshiki to go around him to try and find information #Also how Len can give endless little details on Yoshiki’s dad but can’t even write the words #Grandmother and grandfather above the mom’s head #Hikaru ga Shinda natsu #hgsn #the summer hikaru died #HGSN spoilers #my HGSN shit

[sempsimps]

Drunk Alastor x (fem reader)

oof here we go second fanfic ever, i loved the support i got from the first one and honestly i was confused and inspired (sorry if my writing sucks :] but im taking advice and using ,'s also this took me a week to write lol) also its a little head cannon of mine but i feel like Alastor would actually really like Shakespeare idfk

tags;

nsfw

angst with comfort

description of a panic attack (writing from experience oop)

sub Alastor soft dom reader (be gentle he's sensitive lmao)

drinking ikik shock horror

some biting and hickeys mentioned

blowing off steam i guess

might be ooc becuse I've never written (anything) Alastor before

more tags to cum :P

i hate to say it but mimzy was right, put on some jazz and pour some rye and alastor becomes a kitten, so i did just that. when husk left he was my only cover from mimzy so i was stuck with her. all she talked about was either alastor and her "amazing dancing skills" 'yeah right, yesh talk about self centred' it was so obvious she liked alastor more than a friend but t did apreaciate the tips even if she didnt know we were a thing, the whole loan shark situation clearly was the last straw for alastor especially after lucifers whole uh well "fight", he claimed to have to let off some steam with the loan sharks but i could see right through him, although i secretly cheered when alastor told mimzy to leave the hotel the irritation was clear on alastors face his smile seeming off and so with my newly learned information to use i turn to husk he seemed shaken as well.

"yo husk you wouldn't happen to have a full bottle of rye?"

he looked at me one eyebrow raised and turned around to a locked box with a padlock and everything from under the counter 'the fuck'.

"i know you and al are uh whatever the fuck you are but j-just don't tell him i gave this to you because well hell probably make me pay in some way"

"oh, okay then no problem i wont say a thing"

Husk handed me the bottle 'oh shit okay then he really loves ....' i turn the bottle to read the label, it said straight whiskey 'ah that makes so much sense, okay' i slowly nod at husk as he opened two more bottles 'oh shit that bad okay then' i gave him an awkward salute and walked off the bottle in hand, i headed to my room to grab a blanket and my speaker thing to play jazz/electro swing from my playlist with some of my favourites on there, after todays events i knew that he would need a drink and i wanted to save husk some trouble and ya know spend time with al. so i got to work setting up i had the only spare key to his private study and i thought that the swampy area would look nice, i brought a black and red plaid picnic blanket from my room to put on the ground using random rocks to keep the corners in place i found a short stool it was wooden and looked right at home in this room the deer accents on the legs added a nice touch i used that to place a candle, it said it was "black cherry" on the label 'that name isn't really fitting the candle its red, but it certainty dose smell like cherries' i placed it onto the wooden surface i stood up and walked towards the wooden side of the room looking back at my small display and smiled 'not as shit as i thought it would look, improvement !' i looked around the room and found some glasses they were cool looking 'oooo fancy' i set onto the stool along with the untouched bottle of rye, i connected the speaker to my phone Alastor disliked the fact i had it to begin with but accepted it as a safety measure if i ever needed it which he made sure i didn't, anyway the devices connected and the first song posing started to play i nodded my head along before i left the room i made sure to light the candle 'okay now to find the unusually grumpy deer' i exit his study and locked the door behind me, the rest of the staff and residents were off in their rooms or busy with somthing, it was quite late now. i heard the click of the lock and pocketed the key and off to search for the strawberry man, it didn't take me long to hear the static and loud screeches coming from the lobby i was now hurried in my steps i approached the sound of Alastor and seen him leaning over the bar half demon mode towering over husk his antlers protruding from his head and the green symbols slowly floating around him, no doubt dials in his eyes.

"husk for your own soul,where is it!?"

"i told you b-boss its not here"

'oh shit oh shit oh fuck, okay i fucked up' i seen husk slightly trembling ears pulled back, wings tucked behind him and our eyes meet he asked for help silently, i half ran and half jogged towards Alastor, i gently tugged at his coat getting a large radio feedback screech jumping a little at the sound, before he turned around around with an audible snap to see me and i reacted by rushing out my words.

"hey! al i know you hate being touched but i didn't know how to get your attention safely but that's not important right now! come with me"

i spoke rapidly briefly confusing the deer he froze. antlers going back to normal shape and size before i kinda dragged him out of the lobby towards his study by the tail of his coat giving husk a last look of apology, i felt a light tug at my wrist and i let him go immediately and i held my head down in slight embarrassment as we walked down a hallway.

"although i don't completely despise the touch from you my dear, but-"

"no no its okay sorry i know i pushed a boundary. just didn't know how else i was suppose to calm the situation and uh i have the rye Mimzy said you liked it so i asked husk for some that's why he uhh didn't have it...."

i seen his eye twitch momentarily as we walked. the silence was deafening low sound of static emitting from him echoing in the hallway eerily, but as we got closer to his study his ears fluttered up at the muffled soft sound of jazz that was coming from the room, his slightly strained smile fell into a smirk his whole face softening, he snapped his fingers to open his study greeted by the set picnic blanket and the sent of the candle wafted in the air masking the dead venison that was all around in this room with cherries instead.

"i know its not a lot but i thought it would help with the shitty day you've had, well i don't even know what to call the thing you got with lucifer.... b-but that's besides the point i just thought i would keep you company if you need too vent or just relax"

"thank you my dear, i appreciate the gesture"

his smile was soft as he walked over to the blanket and sat down i slowly trailed behind him, he took of his coat and folded in onto the stool his dress shirt looking a little dishevelled as he unclipped his bowtie resting it on top 'oh thank fuck i was scared he would be mad or kill husk, welp he isn't so ill take that as a win' i sat next to Alastor and he opened the whisky and poured us both a glass, his glass had more in it 'i guess he dose need this' Alastor sighed and took a large sip leaning back onto his elbows landing just at the end of the blanket i took a swig of my glass feeling the strong liquor on my tongue my eyes squinted at the taste.

"hey.....do you want to talk about it?"

the silence was now more comforting now the white noise of Alastor's static taking a soft spot within the wordless jazz songs, i still held my glass and decided to quickly down it i felt like i needed it for this conversation, it is liquid courage after all. he obviously felt the same taking a sip before answering.

"i didn't want to send Mimzy away.... we were in the same circles when alive... she's a dear friend of mine! but the danger she carries with her often causes trouble due to her very nature"

his ears pinned back to his head his smile straining ever so slightly his eyes showing his true emotion as he carried his rant i listened intently as he's now sitting up.

"and-and i just loath this feeling of being so controlled i was.... sad? to make her go but they made me! i feel that I've betrayed her my dear"

his head rested in his hands covering the sides his face, body hunched over suddenly his eyes scrunched closed in pain? 'wait pain!?' hands moving to his throat wrapping around like he was choking laboured breathing could be heard, his slight shivers running throughout his body, ears twitching, opening his eyes focused on the grass in front him the body movements seizing up smile ever present 'oh fuck uuhhh i need to do somthing' my voice slightly wavers as i softly spoke to not scare him.

"hey hey hey al its gonna be okay hey....'

i knelt to face him slowly putting my hands in front of were his eyes were focusing on the floor as to not scare him, the grip around his head and neck loosened and he removed his hands to place them gently in mine, they were shaking so i closed my hands around his softly. i looked towards his face his eyes were shut closed to try too banish the tears smile still present but barely holding emotion i knew he hated to show weakness so this was a very rare occurrence but the distress was clear. he moved my hands to his face i let him guide me so he could be in control, he reviled in the soft contact calming himself down, his breathing evened out and i felt heat leave his face and his body relaxed as he leaned back onto the blanket pulling me with him and i lay next to his form.

"heyyy al i know this is.... difficult but ill always be here. okay? ill always be here for you no matter what"

"t thank you...."

no words were said from there as we both had another glass clinking them before downing it each laying down again, i softly rub my thumb against his palm to be comforting 'im not good at this shit'. i sigh and i let go and reached out to refill my drink again i lifted it to my lips the smooth jazz ended and the next song on was "eat you by carnival of thieves" and i only had a sip of my fourth drink before i was on my feet 'when did he get up!' i placed the glass down on the stool.

"come on my dear lets dance!"

"are you sure?"

"why wouldn't i be?"

i looked to his face he seemed happier now 'ah alright then, glad he got that out' i linked hands with Alastor he pulled me into him almost crashing into his chest. i looked up to see in his eyes now looking at me with soft passion as we danced along the grassy area of the room, my feet not as accustomed to dancing as my steps were out of rhythm to the surprising fast pace of the song, Alastor just laughed in response and he carefully moved in step to guide me, hips swaying to the sound. our feet now moving in sync to the beat of the song, he looked happy as he started to sing to the song joining in staggering my steps and signing along to the chorus.

"i go hungry every night~ ,but not this time around~~.... I'm gonna eat you, your my desire~"

"im gonna sharpen all my teeth and build a fire~"

"im gonna eat you~ ,cook and defeat you~ ,gonna breath you in my lungs and make you mine~"

his hands loosened in mine as we gently moved across the grass together letting all the stress of the day be released in the playful dancing. Alastor spun me around with a fancy flourish carefully so his face could rest in my neck, as the slower verse played we began to slowly sway back and forth i accidentally stepped on his foot from the odd angle

"oh shit sorry"

"haha don't worry my dear it was an accident"

"okay still sorry though"

" l'amour ne regarde pas avec les yeux mais avec l'esprit, donc Cupidon ailé est peint en aveugle" (love does not look with the eyes but with the mind, so winged Cupid is painted blind)

"such a charmer as always my love"

once the song ended we continued to dance together for many more enjoying the time we had, until i tripped on a rock falling backwards Alastor caught me with one hand on the small of my back other one still in my hand he made it look like this was practiced and i wasn't a dumbass 'wow maybe I've to much to drink already' i was pulled back onto both feet before being lead to sit down.

"maybe that's enough for now my dear wouldn't want you falling for me again, the run of true smooth never love course. wait no that's not right"

i rolled my eyes as we laid together yet again having another drink each Alastor having two, i was feeling giddy from the whiskey and so was he showing his more comfortable loving side that was a rare sight, his hands resting on my hip tracing circles not that he doesn't do all of this already but he was letting me do the same guiding my hands to his side to mimic his movements tracing patterns as we just talked together enjoying the company but the funny thing is that Alastor is a lightweight when it comes to drinking so its not even after the 5th round he is slurring his words around.

"these mortals be fools lord what!"

"uh huh?"

"in shine ink my may black still bright love"

"al what are you talking about?"

we laughed and talked some more but Alastor rolled my body to lay upon his, maybe it was the drinks were getting to both our heads but Alastor face was slightly red and i was feeling a little hot under the collar myself, sighing adjusting my position on top of Alastor i moved down to feel somthing against my thigh 'oh what the hell?- OH' my eyes snapped back up to meet his gaze that was looking away ears pointed flat against his head face competing for his hair shade.

"oh shit i uh i can get off?"

only response i got was a tight grip at my hips when i was about to get off, i felt claws lightly scratching at the skin holding me in place my face getting red 'oh shit okay then' and a low static emitting from his chest it was similar to a purr 'heh like a cat cute', i attempt to sit up only to have a harsh grip on my hips, i lightly tapped his hand so i could do that i sat up my thighs on either sides of his form feeling his excitement more prominent against my thigh 'i did not think that's how this would go' i slowly move against him grinding my hips in a slow rhythm looking at his face for conformation his eyes darted away ears still back but he didn't look upset in the slightest.

"you okay?"

i leaned down softly kissing his lips his pressed hard into mine savouring every moment 'he was touch starved has to be' moving my hand down to unbutton my shirt once down i sat back up to slide it off my body before i unbutton Alastor's dress shirt looking to his face for confirming it was okay which he gave a nod still grinding in my body i moved harsher and then i heard it. i halted myself completely 'holy shit this man whimpers' wide eyed he stared at my face i started to move again eliciting another breathy gasp and whimper. i reached down between our bodies to undo his belt with little effort and let his arousal out, the heat from it was intoxicating, as the precum smearing on my thigh my hand wrapped around it surprisingly big, plenty to fill me 'Jesus fuck he looks amazing' Alastor whimpers a little as i slowly pumped his length more low and quite sounds spilling from his lips i leaned down hands either side of his face to keep myself balanced his tongue asked for entry and i allowed it as i swallowed every sound he made i was getting out of breath and pulled away from the passionate kiss my body still moving against Alastor. his hands claw at my hips silently begging asking me to speed up, i lightly grasp at his wrists with both hands before i gripped them and pinned his hands either side of his head, ears perked up the look of shock and "fuck, do i find this hot?" in his face was worth dying for as i continued the teasing slow pace against his length he could easily stop me. he was powerful enough to, but he didn't, he let me take the lead and overpower him. i increased my speed feeling his ever heightening arousal he was quite vocal I'm guessing it was the alcohol because he doesn't tend to be like this the endless gasps filling the room 'holy fuck who would of thought that the great radio demon would want to be under me' i suddenly heard a low growl from his lips.

"stop teasing me dear"

"okay i will"

i moved my shorts and underwear to the side and lowered myself onto Alastor both of us crying out in pleasure as i fully went down, i didn't move 'fuck this feels so good fuck' i stayed still letting us both get comfortable again looking to him for a nod, in which he provided biting his lip. i slowly moved up and down along his length eliciting gasps from both parties. i had only moved so much before Alastor thrusted desperately into me needing the release i matched his pace quickly approaching my climax as i felt his cock twitch inside of me, the slick that pooled between my legs serving more than enough to glide it constant praise falling from my lips the demon under me turning into putty, a string of i love yous and gasps mixed with moans the outside world oblivious to us. i felt my body shake as i was close to cuming my thighs shudder as i hit my high, body slumping forward to kiss his lips. Alastor kept thrusting up into me he growled and snarled as he back arched and teeth sank into my collar bone, cock twitching as he came into me we both laid there in each others embrace finding comfort in one other as he lapped at the bite wound in apology. i phased in and out of sleep listing to his heartbeat 'I'm surprised he even has one' i felt him sit up keeping my body pressed to his.

"eh bien, c'était du sexe splendide, ma chérie"

Alastor took his cock out of me pushing it back into his boxers before he picked me up and walked us towards the wooden area of the room and opened a door into his actual bedroom laying us both down on his bed peacefully sleeping in the warmth of our bodies.

sorry if the ending seemed rushed i am completing this before i need to be up in like an hour and this has been driving me mental for a week sorry if my writing sucks :]

#alastor smut #hazbin hotel fanfic #hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #fanfic #smut #drunk #drunk shenanigans

[enchanting-grom-fright]

ok i’ll shut up just one more rant

bcs i need to vent abt this lol 😭😭

idk guys idfk i’m just absolutely fucking exhausted 

i was just watching smthing, like smthing completely unrelated, and all of a sudden everything just came back to me, like completely exactly like i was there. which like at this point i’m used to i can typically brush it off, but this was one of the times where it really stuck with me. and then after that when i was jolted back to reality (and after i actually then realized i was just alone and in my bedroom) i was super just like out of it. emotionally i felt no different or safer than before and that was all i could think just that in the moment panic and feeling like ur gasping for a way out but there isn’t one and that just makes it worse and everytime i closed my eyes that’s all i could envision and i could almost feel it it felt like i was feeling it and i was also just like hysterically whispering to myself just stop like nonstop repeatedly the entire time and like idek it was odd. and like i’m used to it it’s not like this is new so i tried i really tried to calm myself down i was sat there for so long but nothing works so i ended up relapsing again after like three days  but i just don’t know what else to do genuinely like i didn’t fucking prompt that and in the moment it never seems like it’s going to end and u really can’t predict when it is and it’s just everything and it’s horrible i never want to think abt it again it makes me want to fucking throw up and it’s so lonely idek why and it feels like i’m suffocating or not even that really it feels like i’m like inhaling water or smthing and i need to find some other way to pour ur out of me so i can breathe again

but anyways idk that’s not even really a noteable experience but also it was also so much worse this time bcs of my sensory issues being sm worse than normal today for wtvr reason and also my routine has been disrupted multiple times today so like today hasn’t even be bad itself but i’ve just been barely holding myself together anyways bcs of those things. i hate saying that though bcs like just in general i hate talking abt stuff related to autism bcs like that just affects so much of my daily life that i just don’t talk abt to the extent that if i were to mention it more casually i always feel like ppl r going to either think i’m for some reason like faking it bcs i seem ‘more autistic’ or they’re just going to think i’m just weird or smthing along those lines so i just don’t. but it gets to tiring bcs in addition to the shit that i need to deal with anyways i also need to spend effort trying to mask it and then that’s just making the issues worse which makes masking harder which makes the issues worse and i have like one and a half ppl i feel comfortable being a bit more myself around and that’s bcs one of them seems to like personally understand it and the other i do to an extent just bcs i do trust them a lot. but like how am i supposed to explain that like literally today i was going to hang out with my friends and i was excited for it but something came up where i wouldn’t be able to have a routine so then i had to just not go at all but like how do i even explain that like idek why exactly i’m like that myself or how do i explain that yea i have no clue what u just said bcs the lights r too bright so now i’ve just lost the ability to make sense of english when i can barely speak. idk guys tbh i forget where i was even going with this i’m probably just fucking complaining

i just want to feel normal though i hate feeling like this i hate being so dramatic that somehow the thing mentioned at first just randomly happens and i hate feeling so different from almost everyone and i hate feeling like i have nothing else to do and i just fucking hate myself ig

[minimoefoe]

the idea of dead city going on for more than one season is actually so interesting bc for s1 maggie and negan are kiinda stuck with each other so it's like, once this is sorted and they find hershel etc, what, they're gonna just choose to stay around each other for longer???? that'd be crazy

crazy as in I would love to see it. I assume that isn't quite what'd happen tho. like they'll probs be sucked into some more drama that results in them needing each other to survive bc they both know the other is good at shit. but I would love it if at a certain point, they're spending time together less bc they need to in order to survive easier or get a job done and more bc they want to or at a minimum in maggie's case just doesn't mind having negan around, maybe not necessarily that she's bffs with him

if the show goes on for a while and they keep just happening to get into situations where they are forced to be with each other when they, especially maggie, don't wanna be that'll get repetitive. I wanna see their dynamic grow and change fr fr

annie and the kid could show up at some point as well which would be interesting. I wonder if the entire show is gonna end with negan and Annie reuinong and them maybe all going back to hilltop and him be welcome to live there or something. idfk. there's a reason I don't write tv shows I don't have great ideas.

one thing I do know tho is I need negan and maggie to not fucking die. like.. don't piss me off. I actually did see someone come up with an idea that was something like it ends with negan dying and it kinda is a full circle moment of he killed glenn but saved maggie/hershel or something like that and it also gives maggie some kind of closure to see that he's changed even tho it killed him like yeah that would fuck me up but I just would like this one fuckin time for a redeemed character to not die

I'm very of the opinion that ppl need to not go back to the comics to explain why something is happening in the show, like use the motives for the characters in the show to explain why something is happening don't just say 'well it happened in the comic' bc that doesn't suddenly give an in universe explanation for why characters are doing certain things but I do think the thing in the comics of negan getting to survive and it being a deliberate choice by the writers to have him live bc it's so rare a redeemed characters gets to do that is a cool thing that should ideally be carried over into the show.

if he does die I'm not gonna be one of those annoying ppl that's like 'well in the comics he lived sooo' bc the comics and show are two separate things and we know they don't follow it completely but I would be disappointed even if the death is good (bc usually what happens with me is my redeemed fave dies and I'm like ugh ffs but the death itself is top tier and fucks me up every time)

#twd txt #negan smith #maggie rhee #negan twd #this got kinda rambly idfk

[pastelroyce]

Getting to know y'all

phwoa got tagged by both @mtreebeardiles and @commander-krios for this one ty ty mwah mwah

i'll skip the tags this time but if you see this and want to play just say i tagged you (i'm enough of a nosy bitch to want to see anyway)

Nickname: Roy!

Sign: Scorpio. Tell me if you're surprised. Please.

Last google search: marvelous designer (a program I've been eyeing for a hot minute)

Song stuck in head: Starlight by Muse

Sleep: with the way my job has been currently, I have to pregame bedtime around 6pm so I can hopefully be asleep by 8, so I can wake up at 2.30 am. It usually never works and I spend my off days sleeping for the most part.

Dream job: I've had a lot of different dream jobs, but if I'm going to be honest I would like to never work another day in my life. Sick of it! But I can't, so maybe something in tech idfk.

Wearing: joggers with a hoodie and tshirt

Favorite song: Currently Unholy by Sam Smith and Kim Petras

Favorite instrument: guuh--

Aesthetic: I love that vaporwave shit, that nostalgic synthwave, night ride whatever the fuck you wanna call it. My normal everyday aesthetic is "I'm in my 30s and I don't care if I'm heading to the 711 in the same clothes i slept in"

Favorite authors: Alexis Hall and Michael J Sullivan are the only ones that come to mind, otherwise I really just read fanfic

Favorite color: Pink and all its variants, reds, blues and purples

Favorite animal sounds: Oh it's so hard to choose. A cat's meow, a bird that knows how to talk. Cicadas, mourning doves. Anything that's not the adult man wail my dog made earlier today.

Last song: according to spotify the last song I was listening to was 1000 Violins by The Cliks

Last series: Dragon Age Absolution.

Random: my bf and I met through tindr and the only reason we actually managed it was because he was too dumb to read the bit where we were 90+ miles away from each other, and I was coming off a four year post breakup depression and was so fucking desperate for someone to take me away from my hometown.

#about me #tag meme

[arlecchno]

5 hours of sleep squad …. i honestly dont know how well i sleep but today i had a dream and alhaitham and kaveh were in it (i only got to chat w haitham tho) i was in this gigantic ass library type thing and it looked so cool , the entire thing was made out of dark brown wood and it was so pretty (i actually had another dream where i was in the same building before where i was running errands around the “school” HAHAH) but yeah since it was a library / school type place i was obviously there to learn shiz and — this is the weird part — the lesson was on dreams !!!!!!! and like bro ?? are my dreams becoming self aware ? 😨 i thought the lesson was interesting but alhaitham tried to gaslight me into not liking it (an exaggeration , he just thought i was lying when i said it was interesting) i think he was supposed to be like ,,, a helper to me in the dream idfk it was funky as hell - sorry for going off on a tangent about my dream LMFAO

WHSJSJ fischl is my baby shes one of the first 4*s i got and i kinda relate to her on some level , i too love playing pretend , but mostly when i was younger id pretty much spend all my recess roleplaying with my friends . trying to imitate my favorite characters is a pastime ive always enjoyed , and it honestly makes me insanely happy when people say i kinda act like my faves (ig its smth i do subconsciously LOL) because its like “WAIT . THEY THINK IM LIKE THIS INSANELY COOL CHARACTER I LOVE WITH A BURNING PASSION ???? [inaudible screaming]” recently ive found myself a new genshin rp friend and . dude . id never have thought that playing as alhaitham would be so goddamn fun . screenies for funnies:

(making cynos joke was so much fun too so i included it)

bro i lost my mf 50/50 to jeAN on haithams banner - not even a diluc , tall men hate me ig LMAO and it really doesnt help that ive been drained as hell from school lately so ive been slacking w my fricking primo farming ;_;

YESS the fungi event was lovely but tbh … the entire event i was just yelling about how i wanted to see cyno HAHAHAH - i suffer with chronic writers block (/hj) so . like . [dead alex sound]

GREAT NEWS my injury has healed hooray !!

absolutely , escaping school is great , id probably go on more field trips if it didnt mean id have to do makeup work tbh , i hate doing makeup work .

DINGDINGDING ! YOU ARE CORRECT ! the region i was going for was indeed mondstadt ! aster (my oc) lives in mond and is originally from khaenriah , im glad i didnt draw in their face yet because their eyes wouldve totally given away the fact they were khaenriahn LOL

my week was honestly pretty busy (atleast to my tiny brains standards , i feel like you could also tell by how long it took me to send another ask 😭😭) i had two tests today (that i frickin ACED HAHA im so proud of myself) one of my friends and some guy i share a bunch of classes with also gave me pieces of their cotton candy and the guy told me good job for actually doing my work LMFAO (i usually fall asleep in that class … haha ,,) and one of my other friends complained about also wanting food so i called him friendless (even though i thought the guy who gave me a piece of cotton candy didnt like me so i dont think he counts as a friend ??) my friend also recently introduced me to a series they liked and now im practically obsessed because DELICIOUS . i also recently did heizous hangout quest and GODDAMN he - he is so . im so gay for this detective motherfucker i was practically screaming at my ipad … haha …… heizou is honestly so my type he has such a way with words and i DO NOT know why a lot of npcs / characters in game talk about him negatively how do people not like him - yeah but i also almost went on a full genshin lore tangent to my ipad because of my uncontrollable urge to explain things SMH . oh my god the part where heizou said that he wanted us to be his partner all the time and i just straight up actually screamed , yes heizou ill be your partner forever if yk what i mean - HAHAHAH i also made a collection of goofy genshin triangles on one of my friends old schoolwork in math class hehe

aaaanyways id like to return your question ! how have your recent days been ? and if you dont deem anything of note or dont want to share , if you could choose anyone in genshin to share a house / be roommates with who would you choose ? (since these are again two questions , if you want , fire back two as well !) also , dude i have a terrible habit of rambling like crazy , so i totally dont mind if you ramble and stuff in replies (because i do that wayy too much as well LOL)

— jellyfish

HELLOO TO YOU!!!! your dream sounds so funny LOL in the 2 years i've played genshin i've never had any genshin characters appear in my dreams,,, it's always boring ones that revolve around my life. but nevertheless your dream made me imagine how alhaitham would act around you 😭 and the way he tried to gaslight you LMAO he's so cute and goofy

haha i love how enthusiastic you are about fischl!!! we all have that one character that we have an undying love for to the point that everyone you know in life knows them (for me that'd be kazuha,, every time someone sees him it'd just remind them of me hehe)

THE RPS LMAO “i just find you rather annoying.” THAT'S SUCH AN ALHAITHAM THING TO SAY!!! also i'm pretty oblivious so this just made me realize that the denial is a river in egypt tiktok meme is also pointing out the fact that the nile. is a river. in egypt???? i just found out it's a wordplay thing???? denial (the nile)???? damn i really thought it's like a random word being thrown to make it seem exaggerated or something 😭😭😭 i'm really dumb LMAO how did i not figure that out sooner 🙁🙁🙁 the fact that i know the nile is a river in egypt is embarrassing too like it never occurred to me to piece the puzzles together...

man that sucks 😭😭 i remember when you messaged me on genshin talking about it LOL please humbly accept my offer of my c2 diluc to you,,, he's been in my hands far too long and i cannot fathom the fact that he keeps appearing in my 50/50's (tighnari pls come home i beg). i was on a 50/50 for haitham too and the very loud sigh of relief i let out when he finally came home is insane. i've basically farmed everything in the new area (i have 99% exploration progress now due to it) and have milked my welkin for him so i'm glad he actually came home... the things i'd do if diluc appeared in screen instead should be left unsaid 🤗

YAYY GLAD TO HEAR YOU'RE WELL NOW!!!

aster is such a badass name and the fact that they're originally from khaenriah???? awesome as hell. hope they're besties with kaeya because that would be totally legen... wait for it, dary!!!! (cue my love for barney in himym i just had to quote him)

also very glad to see that your week has been going okay!!! would love some cotton candy rn tbh they're so good </3

and heizou's hangout quest.... honestly same. i haven't exactly finished all of the endings but i've done some and it made me squeal and giggle every time he flirted with us 😭 made me feel like a total loser with his charming words bro i can't believe the npcs in game have such negative views on him because me personally if i was in the game, i'd immediately fold for him the second he breathes in front of me HAHA i'm . not weird at all.

my week has been slow actually, i finished my finals a while ago so we have nothing to do now so i've been doing absolutely nothing at school LOL! senior year is coming up soon so i might be more busy and focusing more on my studies... it's sure gonna be hell for me.

and recently i've been packing up my stuff because i'm moving out!! (hence why i haven't posted a new asphodelus chapter lol i've been so busy). it's been rather slow for me tho since i have a lot of stuff and it's kinda hard to choose the ones i'd have to throw or give away because like,, i love all of my stuff 😭 my mom has helped me with some but i still got a shit ton of stuff to declutter. basically everything is a mess rn

other than that, i think everything's been a-okay! i'm just reaally busy with irl stuff now but i think i can survive through them :D (i hope i do because i am one inch away from going insane). also my mom's been trying to convince me to drive lately since i'm supposed to start now but i have been avoiding it,,, it's scary being on the road and i am far from ready to risk my life 😔

as for your question, i think out of everyone, i'd choose kazuha. before you say anything, i'm trying to not be as biased as i can since like kazuha is my favourite character ever— but yeah, i think i can accept the terms of living with the kaedehara kazuha. he's such a nice guy and although he's a very very lightweight and behind all that charming looks he's a pretty scary guy himself (cue that scene where he threatened that treasure hoarder in the archon quest that he'd brand his forehead with hot iron) i think i could actually survive living with him. he'd do his set of chores, i'd do mine, everyone gets their happy ending. if i were to live with my other favs like kuni and alhaitham i think i would just die. kuni would be rude as fuck and alhaitham would just bully his way out from doing our shared chores. i cannot deal with them. (i'm sorry my sweethearts i'll do you two justice one day)

time to give a question to you!!! how's your progress in genshin going? (it can be exploration wise, storyline, anything) and what's your current main genshin team rn :0

hope you're having a great day!!! it was fun talking with you hehe i've been dying to get an ask since the blog has been real quiet lately, and i'm glad it's you! have a wonderful day ahead :P

#h answers #jellyfish <3 #sorry for the long ramble once again #i am in need of more interactions with people on this blog #pls someone talk to me

[purplesurveys]

1493

What are three things that were in style when you were in high school? To be honest, I don’t remember most of the stuff that were considered stylish then because I never followed them. What I can tell you is that Roshes were heeeeeeeuuuuuuuuge. Everybody had a pair but me. Stan Smiths also became popular by the time I was graduating high school. As for clothing, idk...maybe crop tops?

What is one random fact about you? I can’t ride a bike.

Do you spend a lot of time outdoors in the summer? No, never. I prefer staying indoors with aircon because the summer weather here is never pleasant.

What is your favorite summer month? I don’t have a favorite summer month and we don’t even have the four seasons.

What do you want to be for Halloween this year? Idk. It would depend on what’s trending by October, I guess.

When do you plan to start decorating for fall? We don’t get that.

Every September, do you always wish you were going back to school? Students don’t even get back to school in September.

What was your favorite class in high school? History was the only class I paid full attention to in a full 45-minute period.

Do you have a desk in your room? If so, do you use it as a desk that you sit and work at? I do have a desk and it serves as my main workplace. If I work somewhere else in the house it just messes with my focus and I always end up getting pulled back to my desk, where I can actually get things done.

Do you have a hope chest? If so, what do you keep in it? A...a what?

What’s one goal that you have for yourself this year? Visit a museum. I haven’t done that at all yet this year.

Do you use a backpack? Only when I’m on vacation. Otherwise I don’t have a reason to use one in my day to day life.

What did your favorite backpack in high school look like? Oh shit I don’t even remember what that had been anymore...I think it was a Nike backpack? It was black all over save for the "Nike” in big yellow font on like the right side of it. In college I had a pink Herschel backpack and it had a million pockets, which was my favorite thing about it.

Have you ever shopped at Limited Too? If yes, what was your favorite thing you owned from there? I have never heard of that.

Do you wear band tees? if yes, which one is your favorite? Nah. I know I owned a couple back in high school but I rarely felt like wearing them; it’s just never been my style.

What color is your desk in your room, if you have one? It’s brown.

Would you ever want to live in a home with all-white walls and furniture? I mean if I was filthy rich and had house staff to help maintain the space then yeah. I spill stuff all the time so the place would be a disaster within minutes if it’s just me.

Do you have pajama days often? I don’t have pajama sets but I do stay in my loungewear all week long, even as I work from home. We rarely have Zoom meetings with cam on so I don’t usually have to dress up ~properly.

What was the last flavor of tea you drank? I think it was just lemonade iced tea.

What was the last thing you ordered from Starbucks? My go-to set - iced caramel macchiato and chicken barbecue sandwich.

Do you have a favorite barista at Starbucks? No. I go to different branches all the time so I never encounter the same barista.

What is one thing you’re behind on? Savings.

Do you ever re-arrange your room? Nah. I’ve been meaning to rearrange and add some new furniture by around this time of the year, but bills have gotten in the way recently.

Do you share a room with anyone? Not anymore. Kimi used to stay in my bedroom every night, though. I still keep forgetting that he’s already gone and I always catch myself whenever I carefully tiptoe around my room the way I used to when he was still around, which I did so I can avoid accidentally stepping on him.

Who was your first roommate? I’ve never had a roommate.

Do you ever talk to your first roommate? -

What season do you want to get married in? Ugh idk dude idfk what the seasons feel like.

Do you own a teepee? No.

Frosting: chocolate or vanilla? Chocolateeeeeeee.

Ice cream: chocolate or vanilla? Neither. Chocolate’s too sweet and I’ve never been onboard with plain vanilla as a flavor.

Milkshake: chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate.

Do you drink protein shakes? Never.

What was the last type of candy you ate? A gummy one, I think.

Do you take birth control pills? Nope. What was the last craft project you completed? Oh I’ve always been terrible at completing anything I’ve started.

Which is better: starting things or finishing them? Finishing them, because I’ve never reached that point for most projects I’ve started lol.

Is your style bohemian at all? It is not. Nothing about my style or aesthetic is, I think.

What is the highest name-brand thing you own? I’m nowhere near the point of being able to afford name brand stuff. The things I do get to use sometimes are my parents’. 

Have you ever sold on Poshmark? I have never heard of that.

Do you have a Poshmark account? See previous question.

What color GameBoy did you have as a kid? I didn’t have one, but my older cousin had a purple one and I used to watch over his shoulder every single time he played it.

What was your favorite GameBoy game? I liked a certain Pokemon game that he played but idk what variant it was.

What was your favorite Backstreet Boys song? I don’t have one.

Did you ever wonder what it felt like to get slimed? YES, I always wanted to be a part of the Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards *solely* because of the slime.

Did you ever name a pet after an imaginary friend? Nopes. Kimi was named after a racing driver though.

Have you ever hallucinated? I remember it happening to me when I was around 7-8 and had a really really high fever. It’s never happened since. Do you believe in angels and demons? Nopes.

What is holding you back from living your dreams? Not having a big enough income lol. < This, and I guess to some extent, fear and shyness

Do you have a paypal account? No.

Do you like your hair better curly or straight? It doesn’t look the best in either end of the spectrum. I’ve always preferred it wavy.

#survey #surveys

[bluubard]

"Am I just tired or do my friends hate me" is a real fuckin mood, lads. A real hard real loud mood right now.

Except like. Continuously. For like a week with no end. I'm so exhausted. I'm tired. I'm ... sad? Idk. Numb.

I really fucking need a hug.

I need a hug and just a lil reassurance or care. Not much. Just... a little.

#at least i can pinpoint my big two stressors aggravating anxiety and stress into extremes #one is being quarantined within quarantine literally until mid november #and being treated like a leper for existing in my own home #its 1000% isolating and extremely... extremely tiring #anxiety exacerbating it does not help. paranoia does not help. emotional exhaustion... does not help. #i had a literal emotional breakdown last night. #and it was... bad. i got myself through it but... pbbh. #havent told anyone about it bc why would i bother somebody with that? #people dont have the time or energy to put up with me for long #and number two anyway lol #is that i have slept. a cumulative 2-4 hours MAX a night for the last week and a half #i really hope they call about that sleep study soon because i cant do this shit anymore #my body is just giving up and my mental health is taking the violent brunt of it #i feel.... i dont know. its NOT good. #but im also really highkey afraid to reach out to people for reassurance that they like #idfk know. like me? actually want to be around me or spend time with me?? #it gets fucking annoying after a while and people dont have the time or care to put up with it #and it sounds clingy. it sounds needy. it sounds shitty like i need to be babysat #i dont. this time has been hard on everyone and not just me #but it HAS been hard on *me* too #people just dont... see it? care? #i just...... need a little reassurance #an emotional hug if you will #maybe its annoying #but a little reassurance like... #you matter. its okay. i care about you. #that my time and existence is valuable to people #aw fuck. ive fucking made myself cry again #i dont expect it... but it would be nice

[frogtanii]

hq boys as the crimes they’d commit

warnings: CRIMES, crackfic, probably many typos idk i’m so tired lmaooo, cursing, drinking ??? idfk 😩💦

an: and i did this for what?? inspired by hq hcs royalty @sugardaddykenma @hina-wit-da-glock (AJSKSJ SORRY FOR TAGGING Y’ALL IF YOU SEE THIS, IT IS DEF NOT UP TO PAR W Y’ALLS WORKS ILY)

karasuno

sawamura daichi- insurance fraud!! somehow this is such a dad crime to commit?? dadchi didn’t try (dumb excuse, how do you accidentally commit insurance fraud smh) to commit insurance fraud but at one point in his late-thirties, he was very very broke and was already working as much as possible so, he decided to fake an ankle injury, as you do, and filed a bunch of claims which made him bank. daichi kept doing it until he was able to quit one of his jobs and buy himself a really nice suit and a rolex (uhhh 🥵). he somehow never got caught tho and to this day, none of his friends know how he was able to afford a tesla on a cop’s salary (sorry daichi but acab 😔✨)

sugawara kōshi- child abandonment!! ok you can try and fight me on this but i feel in my bones that suga absolutely despises children. he can tolerate ages 10+ but anything younger than that, he will punt them into the next dimension. the thing is, people just assume he likes kids because of how good he is with his team which is why his aunt begged him to babysit his nephew taro. taro was being an absolute brat when suga took him out for the day and he was 👉👈 this close to snapping. he put taro down for like 3 seconds to pay for their ice cream and when he turned back, the demon spawn was gone. he panicked, running around the park looking for taro when it turns out, taro was just bent down behind the bench. some random karen called the police and suga has never craved murder more.

nishinoya yuu- arson!! you CANNOT tell me nishinoya doesn’t have a ~murder~ playlist that he listens to to get himself hype (me too noya, me too). one night, he got a lil too hype listening to start a riot by duckwrth and watching demolition videos on youtube. he snuck out of his house to an empty shed like 30 minutes away and maybe... lit it on fire while genocide by lil darkie played on a speaker nearby. what he did NOT anticipate was the absolute size of the fire so he freaked out and called the firefighters who promptly called the police. he didn’t want to get grounded so he called daichi to bail him out. daichi still told noya’s parents 😔.

tanaka ryūnosuke- vandalism!! tanaka had been on alt tiktok and saw a group of cool friends spray painting an abandoned building. he thought “that’s cool, lemme do that!” but then he realized he had no friends (AHDGS JK I LOVE TANAKA). he asked nishinoya who was grounded from the arson incident and he knew he definitely couldn’t ask daichi, suga, asahi, or enoshita so he decided to go it alone. that proved to be a MASSIVE mistake. he got the supplies, arrived to the building of his choice (thanks saeko :3), and decided to spray paint a huge p3ni5 in bright red paint. he finished “successfully” and zoomed back home. what he didn’t realize with his two-and-a-half braincells is that he signed his glorious piece with his full name. the cops were at his house the next morning...🧍

hinata shoyō- forgery!! hinata did NOT think that forgery was even a crime. how was he supposed to know that he wasn’t allowed to copy his mom’s signature on a permission form! all he wanted was to go to an overnight training camp 😿

kageyama tobio- attempted murder!! kageyama swears it sounds worse than was and he is absolutely incorrect. what happened was so much worse. he and hinata were having a competition to see who could hold their breath the longest underwater (you can’t tell me they haven’t done some dumbass shit like this) and kageyma lost almost instantly (he has the tiny lungs of an asthmatic). he didn’t want hinata to notice so he held hinata’s head under the water for like 10 seconds. suga walked in though, saw hinata thrashing around in the water and immediately called the police. kageyama never forgave him.

tsukishima kei- cyberbullying!! first of all, i had no idea you could get arrested for cyber bullying!? that being said, neither did tsukishima who spent 80% of his time making fun of people online (and on his real account!! bold). eventually one of the people he bullied (hinata) reported him on instagram and his very lame account was deleted (pls don’t bully people online 😤).

yamaguchi tadashi- shoplifting!! andjksh this is so funny because this scenario has happened to me and i can just SEE this happening to poor tadashi. yamaguchi gets super late night cravings (and usually tsukki will walk with him at like 3 am 🥺 nEWAYS) so he’ll sneak out and walk to the mini-mart near his house. one night, he was so tired but also super hungry so he went onto his nightly routine and basically sleepwalked into the store. he picked out his favorite chips and candy bar (which are sour cream&onion lays and milky ways in case you were wondering 😌✨) and just... walked out the store without paying. the store clerk was mysteriously missing so yamaguchi made it all the way home, ate half the bag of chips and passed out without realizing what he’d done. once he did, he cried for 2 hours straight.

nekoma

kuroo tetsurō- telemarketing fraud!! kuroo originally did telemarketing fraud as a joke?? like he was trying to prank call someone pretending that they had lost their information and they actually gave it to him??? he was mildly concerned but even more excited. he did it over and over again but he never used the info for anything. to this day, kuroo literally has a notebook full of credit card numbers and bank account passwords but he refuses to use it because he believes it’s ✨wrong✨(but it isn’t wrong to take all that information in the first place under false pretenses, not realizing that once people find out, they are forced to close credit cards and accounts but go off self righteous king). once he brought the book up to kenma and he offered to sell it on the dark web. now kuroo feels less bad about what he’s done! :D

kozume kenma- computer crime!! pfttt this one seems kinda obvious but what do you expect from kenma :). he spends so much time on the internet, he’s definitely picked up some less than legal skills that still help him now 👀. kenma did little mini crimes like getting into other people’s wifi but his crowning achievement was when he hacked into the minneapolis pd website and had it so when you opened the page, a black lives matter screen came up. he never told anyone that it was him who did it but he thinks it’s the best he’s ever done.

yaku morisuke- racketeering!! yaku, the feral king, ran an underground gambling ring in the basement of nekoma (do they have basements?? who knows! i don’t!) during his third year. the only reason it didn’t get shut down was because coach nekomata took a portion of yaku’s profits whenever he won (which was literally all the time). everyone on the team has lost money to him which is why they never play with him anymore. they won’t even let yaku play monopoly 😔.

haiba lev- indecent exposure!! poor lev’s head is so empty, he tends to fall for whatever pranks his senpai’s do to him. this time kuroo had somehow convinced him that in order to grow his schlong, he had to run outside naked for 10 minutes because the moonlight had special growing properties. lev was a lil scared ngl because he was already superrr tall and didn’t need to grow his height (or his dick ((boy is hung)) but poor lev is insecure) but he did it anyway. long story short, an old woman saw him parading around the neighborhood naked and called el policia. 0/10 dick did NOT grow and had to spend a night in jail naked 😿

aoba johsai

oikawa tōru- prostitution!! KAKKAKA iwazumi made fun of oikawa for being so shitty and said that he couldn’t pick up anyone if he tried. flattykawa took this as a personal challenge and went out onto the street, asking people if they’d have sex with him. with the way he was asking (and the way he was dressed), people assumed he was a paid w h o r e and someone eventually reported him. iwazumi had to pick oikawa up from the station- he never let him live this one down.

iwaizumi hajime- battery!! it wasn’t technically battery but oikawa is a lil bitch and overreacts (at least in his words -_-). the amount of times iwa-chan has beat the absolute shit out of oikawa is uNREAL. he just can’t handle the stupidity sometimes so he just smacks the crap outta him. not for real for real but the way oikawa reacts, you’d think a murder was occurring. one time, shittykawa screeched so loud, they got a noise complaint -_- hajime hates it in these streets.

matsukawa issei & hanamaki takahiro- conspiracy!! issei and hiro have a secret blog where they discuss conspiracy theories and such but one day, hiro found an article that explained how jfk’s death was an inside job. he sent it to issei who began to theorize how HE’D do it. that devolved into a massive thread on their blog of how’d they murder a president which blew up and caught the attention of the cia who sent the a letter telling them to quietly delete the blog. they did because they were terrified but they kept the letter and now it’s framed in issei’s apartment.

kyōtani kentarō- assault!! baby is an angry little boy but for all the right reasons. he was at a bar (when he’s all grown up, duh) and he spotted an absolute drunk creep hitting on a girl who clearlyyyy did not reciprocate his feelings. kyōtani, being the respectful king that he is, went over to the guy, pulled him by the jacket and beat. the. shit. out of him. while the bartender was happy with the fact that the creep was out, he was not impressed with the damage to his bar. he just sent kyōtani out who casually adjusted his leather jacket and rings, and hopped on his motorcycle to ride away into the night. i am the FATTEST simp for this man ONG 🥴

shiratorizawa

ushijima wakatoshi- stalking!! poor ushijima has no idea how intimidating he can be. he was on a train late at night after practice and the woman sitting across from him left her purse sitting on the seat. being the gentleman that he is, he took the purse and followed her to return it. the only problem is that the closer he got, the faster she ran and when he tried to speak (yknow with his scary, deep, baritone voice), the woman screeched and called the cops on him because he was a “strange, big man who was following her home.” when the police showed up, ushijima was painfully confused and just held up this tiny ass purse in his massive hands. the cops laughed.

tendō satori- ???!! no one knows what crimes (or how many 😳) tendō has committed but each of his teammates have different ideas- ushijima: “i don’t believe tendou is capable of committing any sort of felony. well, maybe murder”; semi: “of COURSE he’s capable of crimes??! do you know how many times i’ve seen him come into the dorm with a suspicious stain of red on his sweater?? *shudders* if i end up dead, tendō did it...” in actuality, the only crime tendō has committed is ~drugs~ but he’s not bouta tell his friends that.

goshiki tsutomu- would be a VICTIM!! my baby tsutomu would NEVER commit a crime!!! i love this man with my everything and the only crime he’s committed is being too damn cute 😤🥺

#haikyuu!! #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu!! headcanons #hq hcs #hq headcanons #crack fic #tsukishima kei #daichi sawamura #sugawara kōshi #ushijima headcanons #tendou satori #goshiki tsutomu #kyotani kentaro #matsukawa issei #hanamaki takahiro #iwazumi hajime #oikawa torū #haiba lev #yaku morisuke #kenma kozume #kuroo tetsurou #yamaguchi tadashi #hinata shōyō #haikyuu kageyama #nishinoya yuu #haikyuu tanaka #shiritorizawa #karasuno #aoba johsai #nekoma

[wantaichi]

haikyuu + skincare hcs

ever think abt how they treat their skin? probably not. but like. do they wash their face like a normal person? have a 32 step skincare routine maybe??

msg me for any character who’s not here and i’ll drop their routine for u

masterlist.

karasuno

sugawara. lives up to his title as mr. refreshing. cleanses, tones, and moisturizes. !chefs kiss! keeps a jar of aloe vera face gel in his fridge, his mom had a spare. carries around a 100-sheet pack of oil film, more out of habit than of need. good skincare just makes him feel in control of his life, ok

ennoshita. fuckin’ spotless. part of the 0.0001% who don’t sweat easily. doesn’t have a complete regimen but never skips out on cleansing and toning before bed. actually reads the product ingredients and googles the benefits before buying. neutrogena type of guy. 

asahi. facial scrubs are his holy grail. like. dead skin? stubborn hair follicles? haha not on his watch ヾ( ･`⌓´･)ﾉﾞ trims his goatee every 3-4 week bc a well-groomed beard goes hand in hand with proper skincare. a sucker for aromatic products. lavender? shea butter? SOLD.

daichi. “healthy lifestyle is key to healthy skin“ typa dude. rly just thinks natural is the way to go. drinks 8 glasses of water, eats his veggies, exercises regularly, gets 8 hours of sleep. sounds like smth off wikihow if u ask me. probably is.

tsukishima. cetaphil hoe. brand loyalty embodied. on it for 5++ years, and never once considered switching. BUT. his routine ends at step 1. cleanse. and that’s it. the fuck he need a 32 step skincare routine for? long as he gets a day’s worth of grime and dirt off his face, he gucci

yamaguchi. sensitive skin’s got him constantly changing/exploring different products. rode on tsukki’s cetaphil agenda for the first few years of puberty (rly just out of curiousity) but dropped out when his skin got used to it. thinks pimple patches are a blessing to mankind.

tanaka. fuck. chaotic greasy. asks for oil film from suga just to stick it on his forehead, lets it stay there. uses whatever’s in the bathroom to wash off, aka majority of saeko’s products. got yelled at once to “get his greasy ass over here” and got slabbed with aztec healing clay mask. converted to clay mask hoe after 20 minutes. “mm this shit’s dope!”

nishinoya. fuck. chaotic greasy part ii. but make it baby face. only does skincare when chillin at the tanakas. homie got him to try the clay mask bc chick’s dig that. “bro, u mean the mask or boys who do the mask?” “both bro” “awshit bro gimme that” thinks splashing some water twice a week is enough

kageyama. ? this yalls mans? oblivious to the whole concept of skincare, only acknowledges general hygiene. uses whatever’s on the soap holder to wash his face. probably dove. doesnt really have much skin problems to begin with, only breaks out once a year. living proof that god has favorites.

hinata. only started taking skincare seriously that time a huge ass zit grew on his chin. yachi offered him her unfinished bottle of cosrx (she’s a hoarder and u kno it), and has since been giving him all her leftover bottles. basically gets to use good quality products for free smh

nekoma

kuroo. not very big on the idea of skincare per se, but supports any brand on that cruelty-free and vegan agenda. reads the product ingredients like a children’s book. “mm phenoxyethanol and retinyl palmitate.. i’ll take it.” always leaves the saleslady stunned.

kenma. too lazy to adopt a routine. but regularly uses his mom’s facial wash. you know. those mom brands. has a stash of facemasks from lev’s trip to korea —> only form of skincare he actually appreciates bc he can simultaneously play his games and be all bout dat self care 

lev. abuses his perks of having a sister. casually uses all alisa’s imported, high end stuff. la prairie. estee lauder. la mer. and she doesn’t mind bc her “levochka deserves all the finest things”. boujee ass russians

yaku. baby face. when god made it rain collagen, he was freestylin in a pool full of it while we was all sleepin. doesn’t exert much effort, just cleanses and tones bc it’s part of proper hygiene. girls envy him. parents in their 40s wanna be him. 

seijoh

oikawa. SKINCARE HOE KING. fuckin high maintenance. goes to the derma for his monthly laser facial treatment. on broke days, he settles for a diamond peel. skin so smooth it puts the entire female population to shame. spends his savings on those clinique eye creams. probably modeled for the face shop once

iwaizumi. homie reeks of male cleanser. might either dove men or nivea men. there’s no in between. oikawa internally screams everytime he witnesses his bff wash his face. two words. aggressive. rubbing. bordering on hostile he might actually skin his face off

mattsun and makki. fuck. drugstore cleansers. the ones that come in sachets. agreed to take turns in buying bundles for sharing. sometimes sneaks a pinch from oikawa’s clinique products when he’s not looking. haha dumb hoe. may have an addiction to charcoal nose pore strips just so they can compare blackheads

fukurodani

bokuto. buys whatever’s on sale idfk. genuinely wants to get on kuroo’s go green agenda but too lazy to look around the store. normally just uses the bubbles from his soap or shampoo. his belief: if it cleans his hands and his ass, then it can fuckin clean his face too

akaashi. healthy lifestyle + decent regimen = pretty skin. cleanses and tones. tried his mom’s aloe vera face gel once and got hooked. shit’s relaxing as hell. owns a bunch of facemasks, sometimes uses but keeps forgetting to take them off before falling asleep. uwu af

dateko

futakuchi. doesn’t have a routine cause “who tf needs that” and “obviously not me.” or so he says. secretly the biggest spender on skincare in all of dateko. owns a bunch of anti wrinkle products and probably one of those jade rollers. but no one needs to know that. just wants everyone to think he’s naturally pretty

aone. told by futakuchi that “knitting your brows too much causes premature wrinkles, but not like i’m an expert on that hhhahaha dont get me wrong.” can’t rly do anything bout it. he was born with that face. also buys whatever’s on sale

shiratorizawa

ushijima. surprisingly blemish free? but not entirely smooth? just spotless? basically a rock? never went past step 1: cleanse. never realized he’s been skipping out the 31 next steps. cetaphil hoe.

tendou. dry. crusty. compensates by sweating a lot through practice. might be effective if he’d stop leaving the foam on longer than recommended, thus leaving his skin dryer than his love life. yeah, i went there.

shirabu. flawless at first glance. until you lift those uneven ass bangs. tbh its nothing serious except “are we gonna ignore the fact that his whiteheads follow the shape of his bangs” as pointed out by tendou. uses whatever cleanser his mom buys for him

semi. decent skin care routine. a big boy who’s fairly knowledgeable on other brands outside cetaphil and dove/garnier/nivea men. takes him less than 5 minutes to pick a product bc he’s tried them all, knows what works, knows his skin type in and out. stan semi for clear skin.

see inarizaki + sakusa here

#actually #stan all of them for clear skin #oikawa goes to the derma and u cant convince me otherwise #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu scenarios #hq #oikawa torū #akaashi keiji #kuroo tetsurou #tsukishima kei #kageyama tobio #sugawara koushi #tendou satori #kozume kenma #iwaizumi hajime #karasuno #nekoma #aoba johsai #dateko #shiratorizawa #hqscen@rio

[lettucefather]

Hi, everyone!

So, as you’ve probably noticed, lately I’ve been posting less and less Centricide/JrEg related content. This is not a coincidence. My personal interests have shifted towards different topics and media. It’s not that I don’t enjoy JrEg’s stuff anymore, it’s just that my hyperfixation is kind of wearing off and I want to explore different fandoms, maybe even original creations a little bit more. Work on myself offline, too. I’ve been reflecting a lot on what I post and what it means, and the time I actually spend on sites like Tumblr or Reddit, and I’ve decided that I need to change. For the better!

Since I’m one follower away from reaching 100, and I feel like most of you come from the Centricide fandom, I am now giving exactly 30 people the chance to unfollow me as fast as they can. Just 30 of you. No more, no less. I need 30 of my Centricide followers to unfollow me right now. You know, so I don’t flood your dashboards with whatever my next hyperfixation might be UNFOLLOW ME NOW NERDS. I WILL OBSESS OVER, IDFK, HOMESTUCK OR SOUTH PARK OR SOME SHIT NEXT SO YOU BETTER JUST GTFO NOW. I’m not saying that because I know that around 69 of my followers also like Homestuck and/or South Park, no, no, no. I’m saying that so 30 PEOPLE unfollow me RIGHT NOW.

Hot take Jreg is not hot

Hot take Jreg’s brother from the last psychiatry video is hotter than Jreg which is not hard to be because Jreg is not hot

Hot take TMI is funnier but Jreg is still not hot

Fun fact you’ve all looked for info on Jreg’s now deleted OnlyFans even though Jreg is not hot

For legal purposes this is (not) a joke.

#this is a joke #i love you guys #now unfollow me come on you can do it #centricide #jreg #onlyfans mention

[lassieposting]

skulduggery/alt!serpine for the getting together ask game?

I’m bored, so. Send me two (or more) characters for a headcanon on how I’d have them get together

OHOHOHOHO SEE THIS IS A GOOD ONE BC

ive already been thinking about this and im. Lowkey really glad im not the only one

See I always hated skug with any serpine, like I was a passionate anti from 2007 - about three months ago but. I enjoyed their dynamic in phase one and then i read like three of their interactions from sow and got converted or some shit apparently idfk, anyway u know i love an angsty ship

this got really long so tldr; enemies to vitriolic hate-sex buddies to lovers, painfully slow burn, but they'll both die claiming they still hate each other

It begins with China.

She orders him to kill Serpine, and he refuses. He's not even 100% sure why when he does. It's not like they're friends. He's killed people he liked a good deal more than Nefarian Serpine under orders.

But she says, "kill him" and he says, "no", and then things spiral so quickly that it's actually a few days before he even has time to think about her parting shot, flung at him as he walked out on her: "if you want to keep him, you'll be the one looking after him. He's your responsibility, not mine. And if he hurts someone, you -"

He'd shut the door on her at that point, but he knows what she was going to say. You look after him yourself, you train him yourself, and if he hurts someone, you kill him yourself. A wonderfully old-world way of looking at things. He's fairly sure he remembers getting the same speech from the housekeeper when he tried to bring home the ugliest feral tomcat he'd ever seen as a small boy.

(This will come back to bite him. He's not sure how or when, but it will. That's the way of things, whenever he turns his back on China Sorrows. Her last parting shot - a classic "you'll regret this" - ended up getting him killed.)

But then there's Mevolent, and cleaning up a city in the aftermath of its latest Traumatic Event, and putting a size 10 to the backsides of the City Guard, so his priorities get reshuffled somewhat, and it's almost a week later that he thinks to ask, "Heard from Serpine lately? He's being oddly quiet."

Valkyrie blinks at him from the passenger seat. Her fingertips tap tap tap at the touchscreen. She's messaging someone. He doesn't know who. "He's...around."

"Why the pause?"

"Hm?"

"You paused," he points out, switching lanes to get around a hatchback dawdling along at 60. "He's...around. You're trying to hide something from me. I'm aware you still talk to him, you know."

She doesn't deny it. He's gotten used to that, in the last few years. She doesn't tell him things anymore. It's that distance, the distance he can try to banter over but never truly remove. She's a lot further away than his passenger seat. "He's been looking for somewhere to live, like. Now that he's here for good. So, you know. That's probably keeping him busy."

Nefarian Serpine is living out of a stuffy first-floor rented room above, of all things, Vaurien Scapegrace's pub.

He knows this not because China was having Serpine followed (although she was) or because plenty of old faces from the Sanctuary still owe him favours (although they do), but because he receives a text from Scapegrace at a quarter to midnight, in the middle of a grisly murder scene.

have u beaten anyone up lately? do u want to? think thrasher just rented one of our rooms to a war criminal

He taps out a response, half-focused on the screen and half on Valkyrie examining the photos on the dead man's mantelpiece. She looks like she's just figured something out.

Which one? Thrasher, or the other guy?

By the time he's dropped her home, said hello to the furball and returned to the city, morning is bleeding into the sky. He knocks sharply on Nefarian Serpine's peeling rented door, and then again when there's no response.

From inside, a thud.

Then another, followed by some deeply impolite language, and then the door jerks open. Serpine, wearing an impressive bedhead, a scraggly attempt at a beard and a pair of patterned socks with a hole in the toe, squints out into the hall and snaps, "D'you have ANY IDEA what time it is? This place is supposed to - ah, shite. It's you."

"It is," he agrees.

Serpine gives him a sulky jerk of the head - an invitation - and vanishes back inside. He follows, closing the door gently behind him. Inside the room is dark and depressing and smells faintly of mildew and sweat. There are clothes on the floor.

He pulls the curtains open and looks out the window, giving Serpine some privacy to get dressed.

"Found me at last, have you?" Serpine asks from over by the bed. There's a rustle of fabric and the sound of a belt being done up. "What do you want? Come to take my other hand?"

That's it. That's what's different. "Other? You don't seem to be missing any at present, Nefarian. Valkyrie's work, I take it."

Serpine sits down on the bed with a squeak of springs, and when Skulduggery turns to face him, he's smirking and, thankfully, wearing trousers. "Ever so nice of her, wasn't it? Doesn't work like the old one, though. You know. The one I used on you."

He sighs. "And here I thought this last week would've given you time to come up with some new material."

Serpine shrugs and spends a moment picking out a pair of shirts from the wardrobe beside the bed. If it's a test, it's a painfully obvious one. Almost an invitation. Go ahead, shoot me.

No, this is something Skulduggery knows far more intimately. A display of brittle confidence in the face of a threat. I'm not afraid of you. Do your worst.

Serpine is afraid of him. Afraid of being arrested, maybe, or killed, or worse. He'd have relished that fear, once. Delighted in flipping the tables.

He leans back against the desk, ankles crossed and arms folded. After a moment, Serpine turns around with a shirt on a hanger in each hand. He holds them up for an opinion.

Skulduggery points wordlessly at the green one, and the blue goes back in the closet. "If you're not here to kill me, what do you want?"

While Serpine is doing up his buttons, Skulduggery retrieves the folded sheaf of paper from the inside pocket of his long coat, and holds it up. "I came to drop these off."

Serpine's vibrant eyes narrow. "What is that? An arrest warrant?"

"A list of landlords in Roarhaven willing to rent to refugees. Valkyrie mentioned you were looking."

Serpine blinks at him. Skulduggery doesn't often bother with the facade in Roarhaven, but if he had a face right now, he'd be blinking back. It's a weirdly awkward moment.

"...thanks," Serpine says after a moment, tentatively reaching for the papers; Skulduggery leans forward to pass them over. "That'd be...helpful."

He sounds very uncomfortable saying those words. When Skulduggery responds, "You're welcome," he feels much the same.

Serpine unfolds the papers and skims them. Three pages of property listings. Tipstaff had printed them off for him with only a raised eyebrow and a, "Never thought you'd move out of Dublin, Detective."

"What brought this on?"

He looks up. "Hm?"

"You show up here at an ungodly hour of the morning, nobody to rein you in, and you're being helpful? I don't buy it. I know China as well as you do. She told you to kill me, didn't she?"

"She did," Skulduggery acknowledges, and a very old, very spiky part of him gets a kick out of watching the blood drain from Serpine's face. "I told her no."

"Bollocks."

"Hard to believe, isn't it? But it's true. Ah, don't look at me like that, Nefarian. It's got nothing to do with you. I was just feeling argumentative that day. And, if nothing else, I can always rely on China to argue with me if I tell her no."

"So -"

"For my sins, she made you my responsibility, see. I'm supposed to keep an eye on you, make sure you don't get up to any of your old tricks. And if you do, then I'll kill you. I'll be checking in on you to make sure you're behaving yourself. Think of me as a...probation officer, of sorts. With benefits."

More blinking. This version of Serpine is not a morning person. He bets his alternate self got to sleep in far later in this Serpine's dungeon. "I'm not seeing any benefits."

"The benefit is I get to kill you if you step out of line. I never said the benefits were for you."

"Are there any benefits in this for me?"

He considers this for a moment. "You get to live. Because of me. I saved your life. "

Serpine's face is emotionless and his voice is flat.

"Oh," he says. "Yippee."

He's interviewing a witness when his phone rings.

He politely excuses himself, and steps out into the hallway to answer it. "Pleasant."

"Hello!" Serpine says brightly, and launches immediately into, "I want a car."

Skulduggery's fake face blinks at the sigil-embossed wallpaper. It takes a second to even register the voice, and another to pick up on -

"How the -? Who gave you this number?"

"Valkyrie." Serpine sounds completely unapologetic. "And you're supposed to be teaching me to drive."

Serpine can't see his head tilt. He does it anyway. "Am I now? And what gave you that idea?"

"I'm your problem now, remember? Besides, you agreed to it," is the smug answer. "Before our little holiday back to my dimension, I said I wanted a better house and a latte and a car. And driving lessons."

"I never agreed to that."

"Well, you didn't say no. That's agreement by default. Sorry."

"Plenty of people can teach you to drive, Nefarian. You could teach yourself, even. Watch a video on Youtube."

"Detective Pleasant, I am shocked," Serpine teases, suddenly dripping with insincere concern. "Think of all those poor defenceless mortals I could run into. There's an advert on the television about how you're specifically not supposed to hit them with cars. It kills them, apparently. How will I cope without you there to make sure I resist temptation?"

Skulduggery grinds his teeth. "You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"Immensely. I'd completely forgotten how much fun it is to have you at my mercy. And you did say you're supposed to keep an eye on me."

Skulduggery goes quiet for a moment, focusing on reining in the urge to hit something. Serpine's face. He wants to hit Serpine's face. With a chair. Trust him to figure out that being Skulduggery's responsibility meant he could go to him for help.

"Fine."

"Excellent! And now you have my number, so you can let me know when you're free."

"Since when do you have a mobile?"

"Since today," Serpine says airily. "Tanith helped me pick one out. I can talk to anyone, anywhere, whenever I like now. Isn't that great? I mean, I only have two numbers, three now that Valkyrie's given me yours, but still. Now I'll always have someone to talk to."

"This is a work line. It is not for social calls."

A passing sorcerer startles a little at his tone, and he gives her an apologetic smile. As an afterthought, he rolls his eyes in a you know how it is gesture. But she's already walking away, so really he just rolls his eyes at her back, which is probably rude of him.

Serpine is still talking. "- can send little moving pictures, and I've downloaded all these little applications, so now I do all sorts of fun things. Do you use...whatsit...Snapchat? I have Snapchat now. And I've got Angry Birds and Candy Crush and Grindr."

And that? That right there? That is more than he ever needed to know about Serpine.

"Goodbye, Nefarian," he says firmly, and hangs up.

He checks in on Serpine once a week, officially. Unofficially, he clocks more hours than he'd like to admit parked in an alley outside Scapegrace's pub, waiting for someone to scream bloody murder. Serpine spots him a couple of times, gives him a jaunty wave with his newly-regrown hand on his way to the off-licence, mocking and unconcerned.

But nobody gets murdered. Serpine seems to be...behaving. For now.

"I've volunteered you for move-in duty," Valkyrie says, apropos of nothing. When he blinks at her, she shrugs and takes a sip of her coffee. "Serpine's found a flat. He needs some furniture shifting."

He's not going to throw anything at his partner in this busy mortal cafe. He's not.

"I see. And you thought that has anything to do with me because..."

She polishes off the last dregs of her drink with a slurp. "I can't float stuff up stairs."

The apartment Serpine is moving into is a decent two-bedroom on the fourth floor of a six-floor block in a quiet area with a history of minimal unexpected-demolitions-by-overpowered-supervillain. Skulduggery idly wonders, as he pulls up in the parking area behind the building, whether a mass murderer moving in - and the frequent visits by the other mass murderer charged with keeping an eye on him - will bring down housing prices. China will hate that, when she wakes up.

Serpine is waiting for him out front, surrounded by boxes and furniture, already looking a bit frazzled. His outfit is stylish and his slicked-back hair is sticking up in places where he's been running his hands though it. He startles and looks up at the sound of footsteps, and seems to breathe a sigh of relief. "Ah! You came. Valkyrie said you'd know how to go about getting all this, you know. Up there."

"You can hire people for this, you know," Skulduggery tells him. "Removal men."

"With what money?" Serpine asks, a little helplessly. "Valkyrie gave me some of her old things, but I got most of this from - what's the word? - second hand shops, and the refugee aid centre. I've been looking for work, but...you know." He gestures at his face. "This is my criminal record."

Which...is a fair point, so Skulduggery rolls up his sleeves and moves to one end of a squashed two-seater couch. "Fair enough. Grab the other end."

Serpine's mouth almost drops open. "You want to carry it? Like peasants? I thought you were here to float the damn thing!"

Well, he could. But the world isn't actively ending right now, so he can afford to be petty. "I don't use magic unless I have to, these days. We'll be doing this the old-fashioned way."

"But." The last time he saw someone look this aghast was when Valkyrie realised how the citizens of Roarhaven saw her. "But that's manual labour!"

"A little manual labour will do you good."

"Gods, I hate you," Serpine tells him as he moves to grab the other end of the couch.

Skulduggery turns the facade on specifically to give him a smug smirk. "I know."

By the time they're finishing up the boxes, Serpine's new neighbours have come out into the hall to see what all the banging is about. They seem young, mostly - too young to recognise him from the war. Skulduggery is starting to suspect that Serpine has accidentally moved into student housing, but he keeps his mouth shut. Serpine is being chatty and charming, holding court in the corridor, and Skulduggery mostly lets him get on with it in between trips to the bottom of the stairs to pick up more boxes, until a young woman who holds Serpine's front door open for him and chuckles, "Left you doing all the work, has he? He's a talker, your boyfriend. I bet you don't get a word in edgewise."

It's not often that Skulduggery Pleasant is lost for words. "I. I'm sorry. What?"

Fortunately, Serpine chooses that moment to interrupt the conversation he's having and interject, "Oh, no, darling. We're not together. He's just here to make sure I stay out of trouble."

There's something off about how he says it, though. There must be, because the woman taps her nose like he's just confided a secret, and Skulduggery can't help but feel like he's just been made the butt of a joke he doesn't fully understand.

He checks on Serpine once a week. Occasionally Serpine texts him. A blurry photo, usually paired with a caption like, "what the hell is this?"; a set of traffic lights, or a lollipop man, or a chihuahua in a little jumper. Sometimes he responds, but sometimes he doesn't bother.

It's not like they're friends.

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, Roarhaven's shopping district is bustling, and Nefarian Serpine is late.

Skulduggery's been people-watching, drumming his fingers on the tabletop, for fifteen minutes when he finally shows up with a to-go coffee cup in one hand and a stack of books under the other arm. He's frowning.

"You're late," says Skulduggery, by way of greeting.

Serpine shrugs, taking the seat opposite. He dumps his books on the round table and gives the menu a cursory glance. "Sorry. I was at the library. Almost missed the bus."

A waitress approaches wearing a shirt stamped with the logo of the little bistro they're sat outside, and while Serpine orders lunch, Skulduggery idly examines the titles stamped along the spines of his book mountain. Some of them look old, leather bound tomes with fancy gold lettering, and the rest seem to be...textbooks, of all things.

"A little light reading, Nefarian?"

"Huh?" Serpine - busy watching the waitress walk back inside - swivels round to face him, and shrugs. "Oh. Yeah. I want to see if they match up with the slanderous shite they're teaching at the university."

"Excuse me?"

Serpine shrugs. "Vapid and Ty - you know Ty, weird hair, lives next door - thought it might help me adapt if I learn more about how your world is different to mine, so. I've been sitting in on some classes. Unofficially. History. Mortal Relations. That kind of thing. You have battles here that never happened back home, you know."

Skulduggery folds his arms across his chest and leans back in his chair, amused despite himself. "Mortal Relations? You're going to Mortal Relations lectures. You."

"Shut up," says Serpine, pointing a finger at him. "You don't get to laugh. You're not the one nobody wants to hire. - because that's still a problem, by the way. Aren't you supposed to be helping me with that?"

"I'm supposed to be making sure you don't kill anyone or make a nuisance of yourself. Sorry to disappoint."

"Would it kill you to write me a character reference?"

Skulduggery coughs conspicuously into his gloved hand with the throat he doesn't have. He picks up the top book from Serpine's stack and flips idly through Religion & Warfare: The Rise Of The Church Of The Faceless In The 15th Century . "Think about that one for a minute, Nefarian, and you'll remember why it's not happening."

"Fine. Be like that." Serpine's shoe nudges his leg under the table. "Here, were you at the Battle of Black Rock?"

He has to think about that one for a second, then hums in the negative. "Hm. No. I missed that one. I think that was when I was holed up in Cork with a broken leg. Why?"

"History 201," Serpine muses. "I tagged along this morning. It was mostly about that fight, but it never happened in my dimension. It was borderline slanderous, honestly. The professor is an imbecile."

"You're dying to vent, aren't you?"

"Would you mind terribly?"

Skulduggery pulls his ornate pocket watch from his waistcoat pocket and checks the time. "You've got fifteen minutes. Better talk fast."

Time goes by.

He checks on Nefarian once a week. They have coffee, sometimes. Valkyrie knows not to cross the line of bringing Serpine to Skulduggery's home, but she adds them both to a group chat and neither one leaves.

Nefarian wrecks his first car, and Skulduggery makes the drive out from Dublin at 5.45am to rescue him. He calls the tow truck while Serpine sits, pale and shaken, in the Bentley's front seat, drenched from the rain and squelching miserably every time he moves.

He apologises for calling so early, and for once he sounds like he means it.

Skulduggery takes him through the McDonalds drive thru to cheer him up, and as Nefarian tucks into a box of fries with gusto, he thinks, oh no.

They're not friends. They're not.

"Is this a date?"

Skulduggery tilts his head, hand stilling over the car keys. "I'm sorry?"

Valkyrie tosses another piece of popcorn into her mouth. She's already in her pyjamas, fluffy ones with dogs on them, and she's flicking through the Netflix queue. "You're all dressed up. Is this a date? Have you two finally gotten over yourselves? God knows it's been long enough."

He snatches up the car keys and sniffs, disdainful. "After all these decades, Valkyrie, if that's what your expert detective skills are telling you, I have failed as a mentor."

"And now you're getting defensive."

"I'm doing no such thing. Where's Tanith, by the way?"

She laughs and does double fingerguns at him. "And that's deflection!"

He sighs - dramatically, for her benefit - and as he checks his pocket watch, she continues, "And, she's on her way. Get out, already. You have a date to keep and we have movies to watch."

"It's not a bloody date," he complains, patting his pockets to make sure he's got everything. "And I originally asked you."

"Yeah, but opera's boring. Here, is he meeting you there or are you picking him up?"

"Goodbye, Valkyrie."

"See?!" She shouts after him as he shuts the front door. "Date!"

#skulduggery pleasant #remember when my shame post of shame was mere valdug? nope u get this now #thats right yall #i got WORSE #goodnight ✌🏻 #there were gonna be more scenes in this believe it or not it just got SO FUCKING LONG #skulpine #which is not a ship tag i ever thought id be using rip

[green-eyed-whumpster]

My OC Universe: Rowan 131

MY GLORIUS RETURN!!!!!!!!!!! I really have no other excuse except laziness I'm so sorry but here we are! Rowan is back, and he will remain back, even if daily updates are a bit out of my league. ANyway, please enjoy:

Chapter Summary: Once Marie and Alexander leave, Cordelia and Peter try to soothe Rowan, and he realises that Olivia isn't well. (Taggies: @much-ado-about-whumping, @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi, @abitefullofwhump, @sky-or-something-idfk, @tears-and-lilies, @whump-me-all-night-long)

Trigger Warnings: Conditioned whumpee, reference to previous abuse

“Here, Rowan,” Cordelia said softly, helping him up to his feet. “Let’s go inside, I’ll make you a cup of tea,” He nodded gently and let her lead him towards the veranda again as Peter followed them.

“You never told me how beautiful the Queen was, Cordelia,” He commented as he looked over the purse she had tossed to him.

“Was the Queen beautiful, or was her purse?” Cordelia joked as she glanced over.

“Her majesty is really pretty,” Rowan reasoned. “But she was always really scary, so I was too afraid to look at her.”

“I’ll be sure to tell her that you’re both smitten,” Cordelia smirked and Rowan’s head jerked up.

“No! I didn’t mean – I…” He trailed off and looked down sheepishly as Cordelia began chuckling.

“I’m only teasing, Rowan,” She said, rubbing his back soothingly as she pushed him into his seat.

“I didn’t realise she cared so much,” He murmured, looking to his hands as Cordelia and Peter moved around him, preparing breakfast. “At the castle she always treated me so coldly. I thought she would kill me when she arrived. I thought it would be you coming,” He glanced up to Cordelia, who averted his gaze sheepishly.

“I’m sorry, Rowan,” She began. “I received your message, but I was so surprised I didn’t know what to do, when I got into contact with Marie, she was frantic because of course, William had gone missing. I told her without thinking and she leapt right into action, preparing a party to come and get him. It was only after she had left that I remembered how you both parted, and I realised how you would react when she and Alexander arrived without me.”

“It’s fine,” Rowan murmured in reply and closed his eyes for a moment, thinking.

“Marie never truly hated you, Rowan,” She said, coming to stand beside him. “She hated William. Your proximity to him caused some of her anger to be misplaced, but she never had anything personally against you. She actually has quite a lot of respect for you, to be able to endure William’s cruelty for so long.”

Respect?

For me?

The Queen respects the disgraced consort of the previous King?

“That doesn’t make any sense.” He said certainly and Cordelia smiled slightly.

“It does if you think about it. Marie entered your life not long after William did, but by then you had already adapted to survive as William’s toy so believably that she didn’t realise your hatred for him until the dungeons. That you were able to pretend so effectively for so long purely to survive impressed her. She had never been good at hiding her disdain for William, and so they fought frequently. She never understood how you could stand being so close to him without having genuine fondness for him, since almost whenever they spoke, someone ended up being threatened.” Cordelia sat down and shifted in order to face him as he stared at his hands in silence. “To find out that the person you were convinced was smitten with the King actually detested him, just as you do, it’s quite incredible.” Peter pushed a cup of tea into Rowan’s hands and sat down himself across from Cordelia.

And if I hadn’t been such a good actor, Oliver wouldn’t have died.

“I miss Oliver,” He murmured, fingers wrapping tightly around the hot ceramic, the pain seeping into his skin pulling him back to the cottage.

“I-I don’t mean to say that I don’t like you!” He exclaimed quickly, careful to reassure Peter. “I just… I just wish –“

“You don’t need to apologise, Rowan,” Peter interrupted, smiling at him sadly. “I know how you feel.”

“I-I hope Matilda is all right is all,” Rowan murmured, looking down again. “I hope she forgives me, I’ve done so much to her already,”

“You haven’t done anything to her.” Cordelia replied firmly. “You tried to be kind to her, and William refused to allow you to have any friends to sympathise with. Oliver made a choice to protect you over himself, a vow he made to William first. Matilda should have been prepared for an eventuality that her husband die in a military cross-fire.”

“How do you know?” Rowan asked. “How did you know about Matilda?”

“She isn’t alone,” Cordelia answered, softer than before. “Alexander has been spending a fair amount of time with her since realising her relationship with Oliver. She eagerly told him about everything William put her through. I don’t believe she blames you.” Peter looked back and forth between the pair and fidgeted uncomfortably. He hated being so ignorant. He wanted to help Rowan, but he didn’t know anything.

“Well, I blame myself.”

“Goodness gracious,” Cordelia sighed softly. “Peter,” He looked up quickly and found her eyes weary. “Matilda was one of the first servants that interacted with Rowan, she was kind to him and helped him when the others were cruel to him. One day William gave him a bunch of wildflowers, and when Rowan learned that the servant who was ordered to pick them had gone out before dawn and was suffering from the cold, he gave one of his bracelets to the servant for her. But William had her whipped, claiming she had stolen it. Rowan didn’t find out until much later that it was Matilda, and in the meantime Oliver had begun watching over Rowan. They were married. So now, Rowan blames himself, not only for Matilda being punished years ago, but for her husband’s execution.” Peter knew why she told him, and was immensely grateful that now he knew what he would be soothing.

“That isn’t your fault, Rowan,” He said gently, turning to look at the boy. “You did something kind, it wasn’t your fault that it didn’t end well, William was the one who decided to hurt her. And if Oliver was a soldier, then his death was something that they both would have come to terms with. Soldiers know the risks of their profession, and their partners are taught of it, too.” He could feel Rowan beginning to formulate an argument and shook his head. “I’m not saying that it’s all right, but it isn’t as awful in reality as it is to you. It’s horrible that your friend died, but he knew that it was a possibility and still chose to protect you. He knew the consequences of his actions and made the decision anyway. He didn’t die without knowing the risk of protecting you. And Matilda should understand also.”

“All right,” Rowan murmured.

He still didn’t feel any better. Even if Oliver did know what he was doing, Rowan would have given anything to recognise Marie’s warning and take the opportunity to spare them both. He didn’t deserve to feel all right about this. But no matter what he said, he knew Peter and Cordelia would protect him. “I want to go check on Olivia.” He said quickly, standing up and moving away from the table before either of them could say anything more.

“Do you think we upset him?” Peter asked softly as the door shut and Cordelia shrugged gently.

“Look, I don’t know how long I could continue being so gentle. Maybe it’s worth him getting upset.” She said.

“I don’t think that’s appropriate.” Peter frowned just as the door flew open again.

“Peter!” Rowan exclaimed. “Peter, I think Olivia isn’t well!”

#whump #medieval whump #my writing #oc #Rowan #Peter #Cordelia #reference to previous abuse #recovery #my keyboard isn't used to writing again so it keeps bugging out wtf

[ig-hazlovesdraco]

drarry enemies to lovers muggle au

so harry and draco are still schoolboy rivals, (soccer vs basketball 'better sport' rivalry maybe?) but harry recently realized he liked draco in his senior year (he loved how riled up and emotional draco would get when he annoyed him and the way he acted with his team made harry so soft), and now it's the summer after senior year.

so harry decides to shoot his shot — what's he got to lose, right? they're off to college in a couple months anyways.

so when harry learns that draco has a summer job at the mall, he gets a job at the store across from him. during all of harry's breaks, he goes into draco's store and flirts with draco, but draco never takes him seriously, and just ignores him or brushes him off as joking and calls him immature for continuing to do it.

every time draco rejects him, harry hides it well but his heart drops further and further until the point where he just can't do it anymore, it's taking a toll on him. so he quits his job and disappears.

draco keeps working normally. he feels like something is off, but he ignores it. but he keeps checking his watch at the 9 o'clock and 11 o'clock breaks harry usually has before they both got off at 12. it takes him a while, until pansy comes in and draco, not looking up, feels a weight being taken off of his chest. he grins, sighs exasperatedly, and says, "What now, Potter?" but it's not him. it's pansy.

it's then that he knows, he misses harry. but not in a friend way — pansy hadn't seen him for a month, she was off in Barbados. he hadn't missed her like this, like there was an ache somewhere in his body that he couldn't reach and fix on his own.

so, when uni starts, he tries to get drunk and hook up to get his mind off of harry, but he can't. harry's all he can think of, and he wonders how he'd missed something like this before. he'd seen him every day, so as hus feelings slowly changed, it didn't feel different to him back then.

he remembers a picnic harry had forced him into the day before he disappeared. it was harry's birthday, July 31st. he hadn't done anything for him, but harry had appeared in his shop after they got off and guilted him into the picnic, since ron and hermione were too "gag worthy now that they were a couple", his other friends were on vacation, and he'd rather not spend his eighteenth birthday with his aunt and uncle.

so draco agreed, and it was magical. draco thought he'd just been drinking beer and not just fruit punch like harry insisted, so he attributed how great it had felt to that, but conversation flowed between them so easily, and they'd stayed out there making fun of each other and other school's teams until the sun had set, turning their hair golden.

so, draco looks up the college harry'd gotten into — and surprise surprise, it's the same one he got into — a D1 college on a full sports scholarship. he asks around, and finds the frat harry was in. he casually attends a party, hoping to see him there, and he does.

their story could have ended there, with a happy reunion, but what's a story without some angst? when draco saw harry, he was draped over another girl's lap, who was laughing and leaning down to kiss him. draco felt sick to his stomach - what did he expect? for harry to mope around waiting for him? draco's first instinct was probably right - harry was just joking around the whole time, he didn't actually like him.

so draco throws himself into his classes and sports, and meets new people and socializes. and it was fine, it was all fine. really.

until harry runs into him at the snack shack before an early morning class and is thrown off balance. he recovers, though, and greets draco with a bright smile and "hey, Draco! i didn't know you went here!"

and all those suppressed feelings draco had resurfaced just like that, and his stomach flipped and it just felt right, to sit there, talking with harry in the queue. he brings up harry's girlfriend, but harry shrugs it off — "someone set us up, but it didn't even last a week. i decided not to date after that."

so draco shoots his shot. what the fuck, why not? "would you maybe wanna go on a date with me? just one, and then you can go back to your ban if you wanna."

Harry's thrown. "Really? This isn't some kind of prank, or..."

"No, I'd really like to date you. I'm sorry it took me so long to get my head out of my ass." All his cards were on the table now.

"Oh my god, yes! Wait, I mean," he clears his throat. "Yeah. Sounds good."

and draco laughs freely for the first time since that summer, and they have an amazing first date and are amazing boyfriends and have a horrible proposal because they both wanted to propose and draco knocked Harry's ring off the Eiffel tower in panic when he realized what was happening and then he showed harry his ring and Harry sighs and says yes and they have an amazing marriage and adopt three amazing kids and have a happily ever after.

this started as a short au idea but somewhere along the way i added detailed scenes and dialogue so it's a prompt + fic mixed in??? idfk man but someone please write this (my only request is have good grammar and don't rush things hehe) and turn it into a 40k+ word count fic and then link me please aND THANK YOU HDJSJS

#draco malfoy #draco x harry #harry potter #drarry #drarry headcanon #hp #drarry writing prompt #gay #incorrect draco malfoy quotes #incorrect drarry #ron weasley #hermione granger #hogwarts #muggle au #muggle #enemies to lovers #sports #d1 college #college #university #au #fic idea #drarry fic idea #fic ideas #someone please write this #someone please write a fic

[vegetalass]

RDR2 Boys as Sugar Daddies

This is so nasty don’t read it 👀

18+!!! 

Basically just don’t tell the lawmen I wrote it

Arthur 

His main goal is for you to look nice by his side and for people to be jealous

To say he wants an absolute doll would be an understatement

This man wants a quiet sugar baby who does whatever he wants

And that’s not to say that means someone submissive, just that he wants someone who is open to anything and doesn’t question his requests 

Honestly, just let him choose what you wear

Model everything for him in the dressing room so he can decide if things are a yes or no 

He always says yes, but it’s a process that you cannot skip 

He also likes a sugar baby who’s happy to see him 

The more excited and grateful and kissy you are when you’re around him, the better

Totally milks you for kisses any chance he gets

Specifically, cheek kisses (in public) 

“All I get is a thank you?” or “I’m not so sure, I’m gonna need some more convincing” 

Initiate sex in his car, you won’t regret it 

Also, go with him when he’s shopping for himself... 

The flex rates will be off the charts

Gets you one of those lil necklaces with his initials on it

Please wear his Vineyard Vines flannels 

It’s instant boner material 

John 

Bad at being a sugar daddy, but he gets the job done 

Basically just gets you a credit card attached to his account and leaves it at that

But he loves seeing the your style morph as you buy new clothes and jewelry 

And loves seeing the designer tags and receipts that get left around his house 

Spends a lot more time trying to do stuff with you rather than buy you things 

He’s the one who takes vacations and yacht trips (and whatever else rich people do idfk) because he doesn’t know how else to spoil you 

He’s also the one who wears $500 sweatpants and Gucci slippers all the time 

He’s a bad father not because he doesn’t care about Abigail and Jack, but he takes you to Jack’s sports games and performances (ouch) 

He’s not doing it to be malicious though, he just likes to take his sugar baby along with him when he goes places

And honestly it’s fine because Abigail makes his pockets hurt too 

If you try to take him clothing or jewelry shopping with you, he gets so confused 

You could be trying on the ugliest, most expensive outfit and he’d be like “Yes, looks great, I love it” or could be trying to choose between two pairs of diamond earrings and he wouldn’t be able to tell them apart

TBH, has a private chef

Charles

All about the subtleties 

Expensive flowers and wine delivered to your door

Has custom bracelets and rings made to give you

Picks you up from work in his expensive ass car

Doesn’t care if you’re walking around barefaced in pajamas as long as you’re wearing the gold necklace he got you

He doesn’t really care for doing the shopping with you, but he does want you to be happy

If you ask for anything, he just hands you his credit card and car keys

And then expects you to show (*cough* model) it all to him later, of course

Expect to go out to expensive dinners CONSTANTLY

Also to do other fun things, like go to ballgames, concerts, and etc. 

Probably has a membership at every single private club and store in the area

Loves a good designer, pink sheer bathrobe and matching fuzzy slippers vibe

Also… lipstick stains 

He will walk around all day with them on his face on purpose

If someone points it out, he smiles and ignores them 

Posts pictures of you guys together on social media and doesn’t respond to comments

Buys you all the latest technology the day it comes out

New phone, new headphones, new vacuum cleaner, and anything at all

Basically what I’m saying is: marry him 

Micah 

Since we’re already being nasty, he’s probably just in it for the sex

He wants you to look nice too, but for him, it’s more about the reward he gets from it at the end 

AKA: Taking it off of you 

He’s a freak of nature, so his favorite thing is seeing his sugar baby in pretty heavy makeup 

Mostly because he likes seeing it run and smear over time

Gets off to you telling other people how much you love him and showing off everything he’s bought you

He’s also willing to spend more on you if you brag

Like Arthur, he likes to have a deciding vote on everything you buy, but he actually takes it seriously and comments on how things look

Probably ends up complaining if you want to buy things that aren’t meant to impress him (see: pajamas, expensive snacks, furniture, etc. )

If you beg hard enough though, he’ll just sigh and give in 

“I work so hard for you and give you so much and this is how you treat me?” 

Sugar baby: “Yes.”

Expects nudes in the underwear he ships to your house 

They’re all G-strings, see through, or latex 

Kieran 

One of those sugar daddies who mostly just wants the emotional connection 

But that’s okay because he’s a sweetie and we love him

Enjoys it when his sugar baby gets a little bratty 

He’s not into the punishing aspect of it, but loves feeling needed and useful

Basically just boss him around a little bit

Has all your clothes tailored specifically for you

Likes to hold all your shopping bags at the mall while you run around buying things

If you genuinely ask him for advice, suggestions, or thoughts on anything you want to get, he immediately has to get it for you… Doesn’t matter what it is or if it’s ugly, them’s the rules 

He’s mostly just so touched that you care what he thinks 

Please introduce him to your coworkers so he can flex 

He’s pretty humble about it, but it’s still fun 

Probably owns some super large ranch out in the country that you both vacation at a lot

The one social media post he makes of you is a picture of you riding a fancy horse there

It’s blurry, but it’s the thought (and the flex) that counts

Wear anything with his name on it and he has to pass away immediately 

Javier

As long as you’re in expensive clothes and makeup, he doesn’t really care about much else 

And not just any expensive clothes, the expensive clothes that HE picked out

Usually they match his

You can suggest things for him to buy, but overall he likes to pick things out

The intent of making you look nice is so that he looks better

Enjoys it when you hang on his arm and dote on him 

Be taller than him. 

Even if it takes heels, do it

Posts pictures of his sugar baby on social media

Lowkey his entire feed is just you in a different outfit in every single photo

The captions are all like “Had fun today” or “👍”

Hair and nails always done 24/7

He makes the appointments for you 

If you let him choose the color and style, you will be rewarded 

Hires a limo for every occasion 

And yes, he has a private driver 

As long as he’s flexing with you, he’s happy 

Sean

Anything you want, you have to ask for

Not because he doesn’t want to get it for you, but because he wants to hear you beg for it (and whine) 

Literally just wants to show his sugar baby off 

All he does at parties is talk about you 

How you met, how sweet you’ve been, how pretty you are, etc. 

Constantly bringing you flowers

So many flowers that they’re practically just laying around your house 

Sex in dressing rooms

No, he’s not afraid to give you oral in them

And yes, it’s obvious 

Slips the attendant some cash on the way out because you feel so bad for them

Probably has tabs open at most shops and clubs, so paying isn’t a problem after he introduces you to staff

Pays for a private booth at a nightclub vibes

Sit on his lap to make the other boys jealous 

#red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption 2 headcanons #rdr2 #rdr2 headcanons #arthur morgan x reader #i stayed up late to finish this so i hope u like it #ive had p*ssy talk on repeat all day #but sugar daddy headcanons have alwasys been my guilty pleasure smh #but send me some suggestions for hcs!! i need inspiration #u can always just drop a reply or leave them in the tags

[hamonsurveysoverdrive]

Shiny

What was the last thing you spent under five dollars on? A Monster. How many times have you cried in the past week? Once or twice, not over anything major. When was the last time you saw a rainbow? Uh, does on Animal Crossing count? Because that was today lol Have you ever had feelings for someone your best friend was dating? Nope. Have you ever used your cell phone as a light source in the dark? Yes. Is there anything written on the shirt you’re wearing? Nope. Would you rather spend two days in London or a week in Finland? London. Where were you living in 1997? My hometown. How was your first kiss? It was alright. Do you still talk to the person you shared it with? No. Are you the oldest of your siblings? No. What're your initials? AVW. What does that middle initial stand for? Victoria. When was the last time you kissed someone? Last night. Do you regret it? Absolutely not. How long is it until your next birthday and how old will you be? About 7 months. I'll be 33. What was the last song you heard? Idk. Do you have any tattoos? I have ten. How would you react if you found out you were pregnant right now? I would be VERY unhappy. What's your mother’s maiden name? M. How many people do you know with the same first name as you? One, personally. Are you related to a Johanna? No. Have you ever hugged an Eric? Probably. Have you ever ridden in a car with a Brooke? I don't think so. Have you ever kissed a Jesse? No. Have you ever worked with a Heather? Yes. Have you ever dated a Ryan? No, but I hooked up with one. Which of your friends would be most likely to become a stripper? I'm already friends with strippers and ex-strippers. How long has it been since you showered? Yesterday. Where did you or do you go to high school? In my hometown. What's the nearest red object to you? Part of the hamburger bun package next to me on the table. Do you have a birthmark and if so, where? I don't. Who was the last person to let you down? Myself. When was the last time someone gave you flowers? Valentine's Day. Would you ever consider getting back together with an ex? No thankssss. Do you like it when someone takes you by surprise and kisses you? If it's Justin. Can you name a movie that makes you cry? Green Mile. What's your natural hair color? Brown. Do you sleep naked? Rarely. Is smoking a turn-off when it comes to being interested in someone? Nope. Have you ever dated someone who had kids? Yes, but they were my own kids haha What was the last book you read? I'm reading Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix to the boys. Have you kissed someone four or more years older than you? Yes. How about younger? Not 4 years younger, but yes, younger. Were your parents married when you were born? Yes, they got married while my mom was pregnant with me. Were you born before 1990? Yes. Is your hair longer than your shoulders? No. Why did you miss the last call you missed? I ignored it. Have you ever been pulled over twice in one day? No. When you need to vent, who do you turn to? Usually Justin. When was the last time you went to the movies with someone? UGH IT'S BEEN SO LOOOOONG. Are you comfortable in your own skin? Sometimes. Have you ever been told you’re a flirt? Yes. Are there any candles in the room with you? No. Does the last person you kissed have tattoos? Yes. Do you live within twenty miles of where you were born? Yes. Is it after five PM? Not quite. Is there someone you always call or text when you’re drunk? I don't drink anymore. Have you ever been engaged? Yes. Has anyone seen you naked in the last week? Yes. Were you dating anyone in October 2008? No. Where was your current profile picture taken? My room. Is your birthday in April? Nope. Are you a Libra? Nope. If you found twenty dollars, what would you spend it on? Cigarettes, probably. What's your favorite holiday? Fourth of July. Do you believe the saying that experience is the best teacher? Sure. When you’re at home with nothing to do, do you typically find yourself walking around or sitting about randomly wearing different clothing throughout the day, or do you usually stick to one outfit? Usually just one outfit unless the weather changes midday, as it wont to do in Texas. When at home with nothing to do, do you wear socks? No. When at home with nothing to do, do you typically spend your time in bed, on the couch in your living room, sitting in the kitchen or at your desk, or do you go between them all or some other variation? Bed, usually. What're things that you commonly do when you’re bored and can’t go out for whatever reason? Play video or phone games, watch Netflix. Do you watch TV when at home with nothing else to do, or do you spend most of your time reading? Both. What do you usually watch? Whatever I'm currently binging or maybe a couple movies. Depends on my mood. Do you wear socks to bed? No. What do you hate or love about jeans and sweatpants? I like how comfy they are, but there's like 8 months of the year I don't get to wear them bc it's hot af. How and in what situations do you usually wear them? Idfk, jesus. What about underwear? What about them?? What type of underwear do you prefer? Boy-cut. Is daytime television really starting to get to you and if so, why or are you addicted to it? No. You’re at home a lot when you’re not at school or working, aren’t you? Not really. What clothing do you sleep in? Usually just a shirt and undies. Is your bed actually a bed? Yes?? Do you prefer other sleeping arrangements rather than the usual bed and if so, why? No. Is your room a mess constantly and if so, why? Yes, because I'm lazy lol Is your new clothing constantly getting ragged and worn-out during short periods of time and you’re not sure why? Nope. How often do you shower? Every day or every other day. Do you wear a lot of make-up, some make-up or no make-up? Some. What’s your favorite make-up? Eyeshadow and mascara. Could you go out in public without make-up? Yes, but I don't too often. Do you do your nails often? No. What color are your fingernails? There's some tiny pieces of chipped charcoal gray polish lol How about your toenails? Charcoal gray, not chipped, bc for some reason it lasts forever on toenails lol Heels or flats? Flats Eyeliner or mascara? Mascara. Lip gloss or lipstick? Lipstick. Eyelash curler or tweezers? Tweezers. Vans or Converse? Converse. Nike or Adidas? Neither. What color are your socks? I'm not wearing any. What color's your bra? I'm not wearing that either. Are you wearing skinny jeans? No, leggings. Do you think you set or follow trends? Follow, I suppose. Have you ever done something just to fit in? When I was younger. Do you go to the mall often? God no. Do you have many friends? Sure. Do you dislike any of your friends? No. What’s your best friend ever's name? Justin, Kelsi, Krystle. Have you ever had a down moment with that person? Yes. What's your most memorable moment with that person? Idk. Who was your most recent missed call from? An unknown one. Who was the last person you called? My mother. What does your fifth message in your inbox say? My texts aren't done like that. Who was it from? -- Are you single or taken? I'm in a relationship. If you're taken, by who? I'm with Justin. What color are your eyes? Dark brown. What’s your favorite color? Grey. What song are you listening to right now? Whatever is on the computer game my youngest is playing. Do you like to dance? Sometimes. Do you like to sing? Yes. Do you believe in love at first sight? No. How about true love? Yes. Do you believe in bros before hoes? Ugh. Are you a whore? Nope. Are most of your friends guys or girls? It's pretty even. What's your favorite candy? Trolli gummy worms, Reese's. What's your favorite ice cream flavor? Rocky Road. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep? Yes. Have you ever slept on your computer? Probably. What's the longest you’ve used your computer? Idk. What's your favorite smiley? Just the generic ones. Do you edit your profile often? No. Have you ever been in a fist fight? Not really. Do you want to? Nope. Have you ever thought about having sex? I mean, yeah. Have you ever babysat and if so, who? Yeah, lots of kids. Have you ever waited so long for something you wanted to happen so bad? Probably. Have you ever not been yourself to impress someone? In the past, sure. Have you ever done yourself up very pretty with so much make-up and a whole different outfit to make a guy like you? Not to "make" a guy like me, but maybe because I wanted to look pretty for someone. Have you ever betrayed someone? Yes. Water or soda? Water. Coke or Pepsi? Coke. Looking behind you, what’s there? My kids' dresser that I took out of their room five years ago bc they kept jumping off of it, and I just never put it back lol Have you ever been rejected or dumped? Sure. Have you ever thought about what school would be like if someone didn’t go there? No. Do you hate anyone? Nah. What’s your locker number? I don't have a locker. Do you have good hygiene? Yes. Have you ever danced in front of the mirror? Yes. Are you craving something? I'm already snacking on what I was craving, guacamole. If you could have one thing right now, what would it be? That lol Would you rather have ten kids or none? Omg, none lol Is your bed against more than one of your walls? No. What’s on your mind right now? This survey, the episode of Breaking Bad I'm watching, and my snack. Are you there for your friends? Yes. Who was the last person to see you cry? My kids and their dad. What do you do when you get nervous? Fidget. Do you like people in general? No. How old do you think you'll be when you finally have kids? I was 19 with my oldest, 22 with my youngest. Does anyone completely understand you? Sure. Would you be happier if life had a rewind button? No. Do you tell your mom or dad everything? No. Does it matter to you if your boyfriend or girlfriend smokes? It doesn't. Are you going to get hurt anytime soon by someone? I hope not... This time last year, can you remember who you loved? Yes, it's the same person I love now. Do you think more about the past, present or future? Future. How many hours of sleep do you get a night? Not enough at all. Are you easy to get along with? I like to think so. Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with? No, she's my best friend. What was the last drink that you put in your mouth? Water. What size bed do you have? Queen. Do you start the water before you get in the shower or when you get in? Before, so I can adjust the temp before I get in Do you like the rain? I do, unless it's been raining nonstop, like it is now. Do you think someone's thinking about you right now? Meh. Have you ever been hurt by someone you never thought would hurt you? Yes. Your parents are out of town, so would you throw a massive party? I'm 32. Do you regret a past relationship? Nah. Would you rather spend a Friday night at a concert or a crazy party? Concert. Do you tend to fall for the same type of person over and over? No. What're you doing tomorrow? Hopefully sleeping in late, hanging out with Kelsi at some point. Have you ever fallen asleep on someone? Yes. How has the past week been for you? Not bad, actually. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? Yes. What were you doing at midnight last night? Hanging out with Justin, watching Hunter x Hunter. What's your current mood? Good, slightly bored. Who was the first person you talked to today? My kiddos. Will this week be a good one? It's almost over, it's been decent. Did anything happen to you within the past month that made you really happy? Probably. Who were you with last night? Justin. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? No. When's the next time you'll kiss someone? Next time I see Justin, which should be Saturday. Who should start the kiss, the girl or the boy? Jesus. Do you have any plans for the weekend? Hanging out with Kelsi tomorrow, hanging out with Needles, Justin, and Carly on Saturday.

#survey #surveys