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#idk what to do if i get an apartment now i won't be able to just up and go when the pandemic dies down i wanna spend like two months away
sailor-aviator · 7 months
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#y'all my anxiety has me spiraling as of late because it just feels like my whole life is falling apart at this point#i got fired from my job a couple of months ago and i've been scrambling to try and find a new one#i work part time at a store i really love but it pays shit#and i've had all of these interviews and no one wants to hire me and i just feel unhireable at this point and it's hard not to despair#and on top of that i'm struggling with my self esteem again#i know i'm not ugly per se but i'm struggling with feeling confident in the way i look as a big girl#and all of my old insecurities are rearing their ugly heads and i want to cry just thinking about it#and i feel like such a failure right now even though i know that life has its ups and downs but my stupid brain just won't chill#and i don't really have any friends in the area because they all either moved away or didn't live here to begin with#and i'm tired of living at home because of my stupid student loans and not being able to afford to live on my own#i have one person i hang out with and we just met and i don't want to scare them off because they're a great friend and person#and i just feel like i'm never going to meet anybody who's going to love me the way i want to be loved because of my looks#also because it's me. and i feel like i'm so flawed as a person that no one will ever fall in love with me#and i've just been feeling really alone lately and i'm trying to do things to make me feel better but it's just so HARD right now#and i love writing because it gives me a chance to explore some of my feelings and it's something i genuinely love to do#and i'm sitting here waiting for the day things start to get better. and i know we all joke and i'm gonna sounds so dumb for saying this#but i feel like i was meant to be famous? or do something great idk and it's something everyone has always told me#and idk if my feelings of inadequacy are because of that or what but i'm scared that my life is going to mean nothing in the end#anyway this was a lot and you can pretend like you didn't read it. i just wanted to write some of my feelings down
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neverendingford · 3 months
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#tag talk#I feel so fucking great today. ironically I'm having trouble getting anything done because I keep just lying down to sigh contentedly#idk. I just feel so genuinely happy.#maybe it has something to do with the smell bout of random depression disappearing at least for now. no longer shitting out my guts either#and also I get to see the cute girl who also likes me back today so that's super pogchamp.#ugh do y'all have any idea how absolutely down bad I am for her??? like. seriously.#I know this won't be a long term thing but damn if I'm not gonna appreciate it for the two years I'm still living in this city.#like. I knew things would get better eventually. I was seventeen and telling myself things would one day be better#sure it's taken eight years but like... fuckin hell I'm self actualizing for real now.#mood stabilizers. adhd meds. hrt. I'm finally able to address the problems I've been battling my whole life.#and moving out from my parents has given me the freedom to figure shit out apart from the situation that's been fucking me up all my life#I just. fucking hell this is so nice.#YOOO I HAVE JIGGLY CALF MUSCLES AGAIN HELL YEAH#I've been a little wasted away for the past year but I've started working out again since since got adhd meds and damn#I don't like being so awfully skinny so it's nice to have curves and slight jiggles on my body again#calf muscles my beloved#I'm learning to love my arm muscles but I've always loved my leg muscles. partially I think cause leg muscles are associated with feminine#whereas arm muscles are culturally seen as masculine. so that kind of got embedded in my brain growing up. but I'm learning to love both#I also just love my body working like it's supposed to. the joy of a well oiled machine doing what it should.#ofc it's not always consistent. but it's nice when it's working as it should#also I bought a wireless charger for my phone since the charging port got even more fucked up and now barely works at all#so honestly that lifted a pretty big stressor off my mind since phone dying is a huge problem and a new phone is expensive#so I'm feeling more carefree with that at least temporarily fixed. won't have to worry about my phone again for prolly at least another year
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buggachat · 6 months
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imagine, say, Bunnyx went back to Origins Season 1 and pulled Gabriel aside as he was considering picking up the Hawkmoth mantle and showed him, "Look, Gabriel. If you continue on this path, you WILL succeed in getting the Ladybug and Black Cat miraculous. You WILL make a wish. But getting there will tear you apart. You will lose what humanity you have, you will literally rot away from the inside, spend the last months of your life in agonizing pain, Nathalie and Adrien (the only two people in your life you can even pretend to care about) will spit on your name and Nathalie will grow to despise you so much she will attempt to kill you. And your wish? It will NEVER bring Emilie back. You won't even be able to bring yourself to do it, because you'll realize that you've become everything that she hated and never wanted you to be. Emilie WILL STAY DEAD, and in the end, all you will be able to wish for is an end to your now-miserable life. All this gamble will win you is your grave."
idk I just don't think Gabriel's response to that would be "oh yay! I win!"
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changetyre · 2 months
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Not like this II Charles Leclerc x Reader (Mafia AU)
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SUMMARY: After losing everything you seek out your biggest and longest-standing enemy to finish it all.
WARNING: Violence, blood, mentions of death
A/N: I've always wanted to write a Mafia imagine and I've had this idea in the drafts for like 2 years now and finally decided to write it out so here it is ;)
Thud.
Charles's eyes snapped open at the loud noise originating from his living room. His hand immediately clasped the gun that rested under his pillow as he listened out for anything else.
The shuffling that followed was enough to have him getting out of bed silently as he made his way around his bedroom.
He could hear someone grunting. He opened his door, darkness enveloped the living room the only light being from the large windows which surrounded it.
"For fuck's sake." He heard someone whisper and he thought he recognized the voice but it simply couldn't be right?
He walked further into the living room, seeing someone's feet disappear behind the coffee table. He silently took more steps toward whoever was there.
"Before you kill me could you at least get me a drink? Anything with Whiskey will do." Charles heard as you spoke breathless from your spot on the floor.
He finally closed the distance standing by your feet in fact confirming it was you. His gun still pointed right at your head.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" Charles asked annoyed.
"Ugh." you sighed. "Long story but your guards are really sh*t you know, killed them both in no time." You laughed, being stopped by a painful grunt.
Charles turned on the lamp on the table by the end of the couch providing enough light for him to see the trail of blood you'd left along with the pool of blood forming on his white carpet.
"You're ruining my carpet." Charles scoffed putting his gun away.
"Least I could do before letting you kill me." You shrugged, your breathing only getting heavier.
"What do you mean letting me kill you?" Charles asked as he moved away and around his apartment. You weren't able to see what he was doing from your spot on the floor where you'd decided to rest.
"We got attacked...idk who they are but- Fuck-" You grunted in pain again after moving slightly. "They are powerful Charles, they killed us ...every single one of us."
"Not you." Charles spoke from afar.
"Basically did." You laughed which you soon regretted with the pain it brought you. The gunshot to your stomach kept spurting blood despite you pressing hard on it.
"So why did you come here apart from dirtying my place?" Charles asked again, you could hear him opening and closing cupboards.
"Well you know...figured this ongoing battle we had going on, to see who would kill who first...Well, I'm gonna die anyway so I might as well let you win." You shuffled so your back rested on the couch and you could sit up slightly not caring one bit about covering the white couch with your blood.
Charles came back into view holding a bottle of whiskey, along with tongs, bandages, and a suture kit.
"Not my fucking couch!" Charles yelled annoyed.
"What's that for?" You asked but Charles didn't bother answering before he ripped your shirt from the side effortlessly allowing him to see your wound.
"Won't even invite me a drink first?" You joked, but your humor was short-lived as Charles pushed your hand away pouring the liquid over it.
"FU-" your voice was muffled as Charles put a rag on your mouth letting you bite down on it.
Charles didn't waste time as he disinfected the tools before sticking them in your wound looking for the bullet.
You writhed around in pain and despite this not being the first bullet you've taken somehow this one felt more painful.
"Stay Still." Charles demanded making you roll your eyes at him.
After what felt like forever he finally took the bullet out showing it to you before throwing it on the already bloodied carpet.
"I hate you." You spit the ragout and panted as you tried to steady your breath.
"Shut up." Charles's focus stayed on your body as he began sowing your wound shut.
"Why are you even doing this?" You asked.
Charles didn't answer you and you wondered what he was thinking about.
"Shit-" You hissed at the pain from the needle and thread going through you.
"Done." he avoided your eyes as he got up gathering everything up with him and moving away again.
"Charles-" you called out.
You still didn't have the strength to get up and go after him but a few seconds later Charles came back with water and a pill.
"Take this." He placed them both on the table in front of you before turning to walk away again.
"Charles answer me." You said more firmly this time.
He stopped in his tracks before turning around to face you. "If I'm gonna kill you...it'll be after a fair fight." He answered.
"Charles I have nothing left." You said, this time not caring how weak your voice sounded or the way your eyes watered in front of him. "Didn't you hear me? They killed all of my people." it pained you, truly did to think of all of the loyal men and women that were gone in a single night. "They think I'm dead too so just finish the job...please" you begged, something you'd never done before.
Charles didn't speak for a few seconds, avoiding your eyes again. "Drink that. I'll get the guest room ready since I can't ask my men to do it."
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ellaa-writes · 6 months
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The Bëast Within
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author note: Part 5! Ok this is the last part till I'm back in November. Will be gone from October 21st till November 18th. I'm getting married and then going on my honeymoon. So enjoy! I'll be working on other parts while I'm away. :) you can find the rest of the series here.
summary: Omegas are rare, in a world full of Alphas and Betas. Being a Omega was not only dangerous but they were highly sought after. After living your life has a Beta in disguise, you meet a scary Alpha, but not any normal alpha. But a gaint Apex Alpha who won't stop at anything to make you his.
tags: Alternative Universe, female reader. Slight smut. Reader edges König into an apology. Slightly submissive König (but don't tell him that.) A/b/o dynamics. Alpha König is big and scary but not to reader. not proof read
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König showed his love through acts of kindness and gifts. He felt bad for smashing your phone, and also as you put it "ruined your life". But he knows your just being dramatic, he spent two full days sleeping in one of the spare bedrooms. You didn't leave the master bedroom, only opening the door after König pleaded with you to eat something.
That's why he's currently inside a jewelry store, trying to pick out a gift that says I'm very sorry but I also don't regret doing what I did. The sales person becoming annoyed cause he can not make up his mind so decided to buy all 3, a matching set.
The second day barricaded in the room, you spent most of the time crying in your nest and enjoying the deep soaker tub. König brought you lunch, and also your new phone.
Discarding the food on the dresser you laid in the nest, setting up your phone. Waiting for the thousands of notifications to pop up.
You immediately called Kalina, you missed her voice and knew she's probably in a panic. The phone only rang once before it was picked up. "Please tell me you're alive." you heard her panicked voice on the other line.
"I'm alive." you replied back. "What the fuck is going on?" she all but screamed your name. "It's a complicated story." you tried to explain but she cut you off. "Are you safe, do you need me to call the police? Maybe the military? Who do I need to kill." she was rambling so fast you could barely make out what she was saying.
"Kalina! Hey Kalina! Calm down will you. I'm fine. I'm alright. I don't need any of that." you were finally able to but in. "I went to your apartment and you were gone, like all of it." she explained. Remembering König's actions, rubbing your eyes and pinching the bridge of your nose. "Ugh I know." you didn't know where to start. "It's been a week! A week of no call, no show, no nothing. And Mr. Wojack said you quit? What the hell is going on?" her voice getting higher and higher with each word.
"If you'd shut up I'll explain. It started that night at the club." you started. "We should have never gone." Kalina but in. "Kalina! Please!" you pleaded with her to shut up. "Sorry, sorry!" shaking your head. "Their was a guy there, an Alpha. I guess he sniffed me out, idk how the hell he knew but he followed me home. I woke up to him in my room, and..... and he marked me. That night, and I've been at his place ever since. He helped me through my heat....I think we are mated now." you explained.
The other end was finally quiet, thinking the call dropped until you heard Kalina'a deep sigh." I knew, I knew he would try. I just hoped I got you out of there fast enough." she said, you were confused? She knew? "What do you mean you knew?" you asked. "Don't you remember me pulling you out of the club? Throwing you in that cab?" she asked. It took you a while to thinking back in it, and then I made sense.
She saw him too, just like you did. "You saw him?" you whispered. "It was hard not to." her voice trailing off. You heard a knock on the door, probably König again. "Kalina I gotta go. I call you back later." you told her. Hanging up before she could protest. Leaving your phone on the charger near the bed.
Walking to the door you could see König's shadow underneath. Another knock came "Omega, please let me see you." he pleaded through the wood. If he really wanted to he could break it down, and he was tempted. Since getting a taste of your omega pussy it's all his dick and brain could think about.
"Why should I? So you can lie to me again." you were being a brat but you deserved it. In less than a week you had your home, job and life taken from you. But you also knew your situation could be much worse.
König sighed, he was going to lose his mind if you kept up this act. He had every right mind to knock this door down and make you forgive him. Even when he didn't believe he needed to be forgiven. In the law he had every right to do what he did. Once an omega is claimed she loses all her freedoms and rights. As she now belongs to her Alpha who is responsible in taking care of her. And if he's unfit of that, then the courts step in and interviene. But you were an undocumented Omega and he was a dead excommunicated Alpha.
Slamming his fist against the thick wood, he rolled his neck to try and relieve the tension that's been bothering him. "Please my love, I got you something." in König's other hand held the name brand bag of the jeweler he visited.
Unbeknownst to him, you had been scheming. Spending your time locked in this room, snooping around. Taking out his military uniform and laying it out on the bed. Also finding a few medals that where also stashed away in the closet.
"I'll let you in if you answer some of my questions." Königs ears perked up, what was this? A terrorist negotiation? But the thought of being in your presence, he didn't care. "Whatever you want Omega." his words making you laugh, of course you'll give me what I want, you thought.
König heard the door click, you unlocking the bolt that secured it close. Opening it a bit before stepping away to sit on the bed next to your findings.
König wasted no time in barging right in, about to open his mouth but closing it immediately when he saw his uniform next to you. "What is this?"he asked. His voice getting deep and low, his instincts heightening. He wasn't an animal you wanted to corner and confront but that's exactly what you did.
"That's my question. And I don't want to hear anything from you that isn't a one word answer or anything that's not the truth. You understand?" you fingers ran along the delicate stitching, tracing it slowly. König didn't like any of this.
"If you aren't going to answer me, you can just leave. And take that with you." you pointed to the bag he was holding. He sighed, setting the bag down on the dresser. Leaning against it, he was feared far and wide. The stories men told about him, yet here you are. Standing up to him, and not backing down. The Beast was proud, laughing loudly in König's head. Mocking him for not being able to control you. But that's not what he wanted, he didn't want to control you he just wanted to make you happy. And right now you were not and it was his fault.
Slowly you were wearing him down, his dick hard and throbbing in his pants. Begging and pleading with him to do whatever you wanted just so it can feel you wrapped around it again.
"I served in the Austrian Special Forces, but things came up and now I'm here." hoping his answer sated you. He crossed his arms staring at you, dragging his eyes up and down your body. "Why did you leave?" you asked. Curious about the Alpha in front of you, his aura was dark and mysterious. "It no longer served a purpose in my life. I... uh I do different work now. Similar but different. That's all you need to know." König was trying his best to answer you but to also keep you safe from his world.
You sighed "König you said you'd tell me anything I wanted." you eyed the giant Alpha in front of you. The sight of him alone making you want to heel over and crawl to him. But it was just your horny omega brain. "I am Omega, there's things you wouldn't understand. I'll do anything to keep you safe." König was growing more frustrated. Pushing himself off of the dresser and making his way to you. Getting down on his knees and placing his head in your lap.
"I'm trying to keep you safe and protected. Don't you understand." he looked up into your eyes. His eyes pleading with you, his bottom lip sticking out. "Than say your sorry." you told him. Lightly brushing your hand through his hair. You slightly started to part you thighs, revealing a silky pair of panties under the dress you were wearing.
Königs ears began to ring, his mouth becoming wet with anticipation. If he was a youngling he'd might even start foaming. The smell of your wet Omega pussy hit his nose, a low growl starting deep in his belly. He tried to push your dress up more but was received with a smack. Knocking his prying hands away, he hated when you did that.
Nobody he knew would dare raise a finger at him and since knowing you, that seemed like your favourite thing to do.
"No." you scolded him like a juvenile pup. "Not until you say you are sorry." he heard your words but his mind and eyes couldn't leave the sight of your pussy. The fabric of the silky panties hugged you lips, a small wet spot slowly forming. König knew from that moment on you were going to be the death of him.
Only if one of his men could see him, if one of the many people he's snuffed out could look upon him from hell. To see this feared Alpha on his knees, drooling at the sight of sweet omega pussy. They would laugh, they would mock him. Just like The Beast was doing now, his laughter louder than anything.
König licked his lips and closed his eyes. Taking a moment to clear his mind, too shut up The Beast and to try and not cum in his pants.
"Omega, I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I'll never do anything and I mean anything without your approval." he was a starved man, if you told him to walk into fire he would. "Omega I promise to serve and worship you till the end of mine time." he didn't know what else he could say.
You smiled, your eyes turning bright at the words your Alpha was saying. Your heart skipped a beat and your pussy gushed with more fluid. Pushing up your dress a little and tilting your pelvis till it was in König's face.
"I forgive you." you said. You hands tangling themselves in his hair once again. König mouth attached its self to your clothed pussy. Sucking on the wet spot, trying to ripping through the material with his teeth.
Trying once again to touch you with his hands but only stopped when you smacked them again. He really hated that. "No, just your mouth. And be a good boy and I'll let you fuck me." you told him. Spreading you legs open even more, resting you left leg over his shoulder.
Yes, you were going to kill him. But he didn't care, as long as he died by your pussy he didn't care at all.
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Tag list: @plumdreadful @traumaramacenter @kaylp-godly @napalmfairy7 @hisa-plush @ramblingsofachaoticthinker @winters-doll @joyfulfxckery @purebeskar @collete25 @fandomsinthegalaxies @xo-konigs-little-princess-xo @jamieelol @luc1ddreamersatnight @cringeycookies (Tumblr won't let me tag some of you.)
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fukingsad · 9 months
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Hobie Comfort Headcannons
Synopsis: If Hobie came home to see you crying
Master List
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-I could never see him as the type to ask you what’s wrong
-Or at least not at first
Walking into your apartment, Hobie takes off his mask and throws it onto the couch as he makes his way toward your room. He opens the door, setting his guitar by your vanity. “Luv, ‘m back how was your-” He stops as he sees you curled up with a pillow in the corner of your bed against the wall. Your face is placed on a pillow as it muffles your cries, catching your tears. Not being able to look your boyfriend in the eyes you keep your head down, feeling his eyes on you. Suddenly you feel a dip in the bed. Hobie’s long lanky arms wrap around your figure, picking you up carefully and placing you in his lap as he holds you close to him, his head resting on top of yours. The ambiance of the city fills the room.
-He’s the type of person that will let you cry because crying is good
“People need a good cry, maybe then everyone would be less stuck up”
-So when he finds you crying he’ll just hold you till you're ready to talk
-He’d just keep you close drawing circles in your skin with his calloused fingers
-When you are ready to talk he’ll just listen
-I feel like unless you specifically ask him for advice he won’t give it
-unless he feels like you really need some
-ONE THING I CAN NOT GET OUT OF MY HEAD
-While you're talking about whatever happened he’d just hold your face WITH HIS BIG ASS HANDS
-His thumbs resting below the outer corners of your eyes
-And if you start crying while talking about it he’d just wipe your tears with his thumbs
Lifting your head from the pillow you look up and see your boyfriend Hobie. “Ya ready to talk ‘bout it, swee’heart?”
He says lifting you and shifting you to sit on his lap facing him. “Yea…yea ‘m ready,” you say, wiping the years from your face. You feel Hobie’s hands cup your face as he looks at you with concern “Well ‘m ready to listen” he says softly placing his forehead against yours.
-But if you don't wanna talk he’ll just hold you
-Like I said he won’t force you to talk about it, why would he?
-He just wants you to be okay, even if that means he just has to hold you while you cry in his arms
-NOW if you’re like me and just wanna cry alone in your corner until there are no more tears left he’ll let you…..to an extent
-Don’t get me wrong he’ll give you your space, BUT
-He’s gonna sit in the opposite corner…
-He won't say anything or do anything he’s just gonna sit there and make sure you’re okay
-He’ll probably fill up a water bottle and give it to you
-After a few minutes of sitting there making sure you're okay he’ll actually leave
-When you’re finally done crying you’ll walk out into the living room and see how on the couch
-WITH your favorite movie on, a pizza and some soda or something to drink 🙈
-He’ll just look up at you and pat the spot next to him on the couch
-As you sit down he’ll pull you into his chest and ask if you're okay
Sitting down on the couch next to Hobie as (insert favorite movie) played on your tv. Hobie pulled you into himself as you both sat quietly watching the movie “You alrigh’ now?” Hobie asked his eyes not leaving the tv. “Yea…I’m okay now” you said, taking his hand into your own.
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Ending A/n: Came to my mind at like 3am 🤷🏾‍♀️ thought it was cute so i wrote it up idk if i rlly like this but we’ll see anyways have a good (day/afternoon/night) peace and love 🫶🏾
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nyancrimew · 11 months
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fucked up sorta intoxicated long vent
cw: uuh mental health, drugs, suicide mentions, very much is just an existential crisis put into post form
this is not a suicide note or anything, im about to go cuddle up with my wife and go to sleep i just had to get my fucked up thoughts out, i might delete this tomorrow
meaning
it's so hard to find meaning in life anymore. i live for those around me, for those i love, those who love me back. yet i keep hurting them, everything keeps falling apart. i live out of spite, i cant let authority win. yet im slowly giving up my cause. i live to prove a point. ive long forgotten what point it even is anymore.
there hasnt really been any new compelling reason to keep going in over 10 years now. i honestly wonder how much it even really takes anymore to drive me to suicide. it can't be that much, im already always living on edge.
i just barely know who i even am anymore, ive largely forgotten the first 20 years of my life, and the last 3 are mostly just fog as well. forced to live in the moment, carrying all the baggage of all the previous moments i dont even have memories of anymore.
how are people just like able to keep living, regularly finding joy. how are people able to deal with bad times without immediately pondering all the ways in which they could kill themselves in?
god i need therapy so fucking bad. i keep dragging down everyone around me. how can i fix all the damage ive done, a sorry won't do. how can i fix all the damage done to me, no sorry will ever do.
why are the only options to just keep going, ignoring all the pain, or ending it all forever. where is the restart button, where can i reset, rewind, apply what ive learned to the situations where i fucked up. how do i go back and undo all the trauma. the trauma i experienced myself and the trauma i put on others.
we're all just lost children in a world not made for us. where is our world. where is the place in which we can find solace. your arms make me feel safe, and at home. but i know you feel the same way i do.
it pains me to know we're in this together, god if only i could bear your pain, if only i could bear everyone elses pain. it hurts me to know you feel this way too. no one should have to know how this feels. i wanna take on all the pain in this world so i can leave and turn the world around.
am i just failing at being a part of this society or is society failing me. i am like one bureaucratic fuck up away from dying alone on the street with no roof over my head. i cannot be self dependent, why does this society fully expect such a thing of me.
is this all worth it for the few moments of bliss, for sparing the people around me from the pain of losing me. would the pain of losing me be greater than the pain i cause every day?
i am lost. i dont know anymore. fuck i need therapy. or just anything that can fix me. the drugs certainly haven't yet, but at least i also have dependency to fight with now i guess.
yea fuck man idk
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scintillyyy · 1 year
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i have this idea in my head for an au for tim where jason survives ethiopia and it looks something like this
so, obviously, both jack and janet are killed in haiti, since batman doesn't have a personal need to go down there, he just made sure that the ransom money went through for their release
of course, it was never about the ransom money, it was about the deaths. so they both get poisoned and offed, since batman isn't there to stop that and save jack
which leaves tim an orphan. he doesn't blame batman, because he doesn't know batman was even working with the police on this. i doubt the police tell people that lmao
bruce feels bad, but he and tim have no personal relationship so to him tim is just another victim of a senseless crime and the most he does is make sure that tim gets the support he gives to all the victims of crime he wasn't able to stop: access to good social services who will help him navigate this tragic time. since bruce does not actually have an adopting problem, he doesn't immediately look at tim and think mine, now.
and then, like normal, he and jason move on to the next crime and tim kind of fades from their minds.
however! things are not over for poor tim yet. after all, phil marin wants to embezzle all the money from drake industries and smuggle big boxes that say medical supplies on the side and pin the blame on 13 year old tim (he's a pure genius)
so tim, who is at the orphanage/group home now, and actually doing quite well for himself, he's very popular and likable, gets concerned when the police start asking if he knows anything about inconsistencies within the company, if his parents told him anything, let him know that the company is in danger
(the police do not buy that a 13 year old is involved in this. or maybe they're so corrupt that phil is paying them off to pin it on him anyways)
anyways, tim is concerned. and what does concerned tim do??? go to batman??? nay, i say, nay!! he doesn't care about bruce or jason that much, especially at this point. he only has eyes for (1) person.
so he sneaks out of the orphanage and takes a bus to NYC to see if he can get nightwing to look into this!!!
dick isn't at the apartment, he's at the circus so, sigh, tim has to find him there.
why is dick at the circus?? well his life is probably still blowing up. and he's still mad at bruce.
and now, i'm not a proponent of dick was super mean to jason at all, in canon he was pretty nice to him and liked him a lot and jason had his blessing and all and he's very glad jason didn't get killed by the joker
but listen. he's kind of resentful of both bruce and jason right now. jason nearly gets beat to death by the joker and then bruce lets him stay robin and is mother henning the eff outta jason??? when dick got shot by the joker he got fired and kicked out of his house. i feel like this would bring out very bad feelings in dick, a little.
just. torn between relief and resentment for bruce. he is staunchly avoiding gotham right now.
so he's all depressed and at the circus and this kid. this 13 year old scrawny, shady kid shows up and murder mystery and all that and dick is just like. who are you. tell me. what is going on.
and tim looks, like immensely guilty and he's like. i don't know how to say this. but i need your help.
dick doesn't know why anyone would need or even want his help.
and then tim's like. i need. nightwing's help.
and dick error code 404s. and this kid. does not want to tell dick how he knows he's nightwing. this effing kid.
eventually, dick cajoles it out of him and oh my god this is picture kid.
anyways tim promises he won't ever tell anyone and he didn't even want to have to come to dick but there's this thing going on with his recently deceased parents' company and idk the police are either not catching the bad guy or they're suspicious of tim and tim just didn't know what to do and he just needs help.
and really, how can dick say no to that? so he helps the annoying little kid, looks into it, finds phil.
and tim is just. so excited. that he got to see dick in action. this was the best day of his life.
anyways, thank you, my trust is safe, i won't bother you again, this was the greatest, i'll just be going back the orphanage now, i really appreciate it.
and dick's like...oh, no the orphanage? but it's not like he could adopt the kid or anything. dick's life is a dumpster fire.
and tim's like, nah it's cool. it's like boarding school, i'm used to it. and i get to go to public school now which is pretty sweet.
and they part ways. but you know. dick just can't forget about picture kid in the orphanage for some reason. he also doesn't tell bruce about tim because bruce is unreasonable and dick's still frustrated with him. dick can handle this on his own, okay???
....anyways maybe he starts going to gotham to check on tim more. gotta make sure he's keeping the secret, right? and he maybe starts enjoying this kid's company. tim's always so genuinely excited to see him. idk there's just a connection with picture kid :(
and bruce certainly doesn't need tim to fix him, but you know who's life is a dumpster fire and needs fixing? dick grayson, that's who. tim has a job now, and he's going to take it seriously.
bruce and jason don't notice dick's burgeoning friendship with tim drake on account of they're busy with knightfall shenanigans
anyways, bruce's back gets broken, azbats happens, dick and bruce somewhat reconcile. dick gets left in charge of gotham as batman! bruce goes on his soul searching and you know, i'm inclined to think he brings jason with because jason is his son. so dick is alone!!
which is very sad. luckily he's got a weird little friend in town to keep him company and that kid's name is tim drake
prodigal with dick and tim!! obviously, tim isn't robin, but they still hang out. go grocery shopping together, drink orange juice. tim just keeps him company, which is much appreciated. maybe dick starts teaching him some self defense and gymnastics stuff.
anyways bruce and jason eventually come back and dick moves to bludhaven to ~establish himself~.
but he comes back for contagion of course. he gets desperate when he finds out that tim's orphanage is affected and tim contracts it. he finds a cure just in time, racing from the hospital to get it to him!!
anyways cataclysm happens. and then....
no man's land!!!
i'm going to say that tim gets trapped in the city, due to being in a orphanage.
so guess what??? he becomes one of oracle's informants along with.....cassandra!!! he and cass get very close here okay.
i also like the idea of him running into young justice when they invade NML as a joke and helping them and then a fated friendship develops
i'm assuming at one point he gets close to huntress too. maybe he's in her class at school and figures out who she is before all this?? idk where she teaches lol im terrible
anyways tim and cass are in oracle's clocktower, cass becomes the new batgirl and this is probably when bruce finds out that tim knows
i like to think that becomes oracle's computer protégé around this time. maybe he ends up as one of oracle's proxies in this au.
and when robin and nightwing come into no man's land, dick is like "tim!!! my tim!!! little brother you're okay!!!" having been desperately worried about him when he realized tim didn't make it out before they blasted the bridges
and now they have to be like ooops yea so we know each other. :| bruce is grumpy, i'm sure. but he also kind of grows fond of tim after this??? tim is objectively a good addition to the team.
i almost think that jason is maybe a little resentful??? like this nobody kid has a super special bond with dick, dick adores him, barbara adores him, new batgirl adores him, huntress will only talk to him, bruce is grudgingly impressed with him, he's like an honorary member of young justice and they're all same age friends and jason is just a little too old and isolated for them being a couple years older and not quite as independent from batman and doing his own thing as tim was as robin in canon at this point
anyways no man's land ends and tim can't go back to the orphanage. he knows!! he's involved!! most likely he lives with barbara and cass but also he's in bludhaven all the time and so excited to be able to help dick out, like, officially
anyways i'm sure bruce eventually adopts him at the same time as cass after OYL and everything has burned to the ground because tim has been part of the family for years now
but then bruce dies!! i like to think tim stays in gotham and does his own thing as dick!batman's personal oracle. interestingly, jason is the one who is likely super isolated and goes off on brucequest, because if he doesn't have bruce, who does he have?
anyways i think tim is actually just much more secure here. he's fine! he had a good time. sure it sucked when bart and kon died, but he didn't have the same desperation since while he likes bruce and all it's not quite the same since he was never bruce's robin?? he's cool. he's got dick.
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jayke0 · 6 months
Note
Hi you're my new fave writer... Thank you for your works <3
Anyways.. idk if this is a weird request but could you write a fem reader x steven fic where shes really turned on by how strong he is and at first hes oblivious to it but then plays into it.. like a strength/size difference kink
Oh my gosh thankyou! Holy cow i never thought I'd find my niche as a smut writer, but here we are 😅😅 i appreciate your love it means the world!
That is totally not a weird request, i love thinking about how strong the boys are, and especially steven. Size kink for the win!
Warnings/content: lots of talk about muscles/arms, strength kink, cunnilingus, praise, dom Steven, probably typos and bad grammar.
...........................................................................
You're sure that if Steven had his own body, he'd be nowhere near as jacked as Marc or Jake.
Not that you'd have a problem with that; afterall, you fell for the man's loving personality and contagious happiness rather than the body that the other two had worked so hard on sculpting.
That's not to say that you don't secretly enjoy the contrast between the sweet man's personality and the sheer size of his arms or pecs, though.
Every time he gets out of the shower, or changes his shirt, your eyes roam over his body like you're a teenage girl again, your tummy fluttering as he asks in his cute voice: "what's wrong, love?"
God he drives you crazy.
You can't even begin to think about him lifting you off your feet like he usually does without your cunt aching for him, the whole gesture feeling different when it's compared to Marc or Jake doing it. It's so effortless too, any worries you have about your weight being quickly resolved as he scoops you into his arms and carries you to bed.
At first, you were pretty sure you had your little fetish under wraps, hiding it away from the gorgeous man only to vigorously fuck your needy hole with three fingers whenever you were alone in your room again, imagining it's his thick digits sliding in and out of you as he pins you down on the bed.
Eventually though, you'd noticed how he seemed to be shirtless around you a lot more, or started carrying the groceries into your apartment for you, even now, he's torn his shirt off to help you move some furniture around in your living room. It's seriously made you wet, watching his forearms and biceps tense as he drags things across the floor and lifts your wooden chairs and table with seemingly no effort. By the end of it, you are both panting, with your boyfriend even having the audacity to turn to you and ask if you're ok as he wipes sweat from his curls.
You're closing the gap between the both of you before another sickeningly sweet word can pass his lips, pressing against him hard enough till there's no space between the two of you.
Steven whimpers on your lips as if he hadn't planned for this to happen the entire time he was strenuously moving your things around. "What's this for, pet?" He still feigns innocence.
"Because you won't stop looking so damn good doing… literally anything." You huff on his lips, frustratedly trying to pull your shirt off without breaking the kiss. A breathy chuckle from the man resonates through your body and to your core, only solidifying your theory that he'd meant for this to happen.
"But doesn't Jake and Marc usually do all this kinda stuff with you, love?"
You hate him so much for trying to pry your secret from your chest, finally being able to pull your shirt from your body with your jeans following soon afterwards.
"I mean, I usually do the soft stuff with you… but even Jake and Marc aren't enough for you, are they, pet?"
"Steven-" You whine, tugging on his slacks with the belt loops on his waistband.
"Answer me, c'mon love."
God his tone is so smooth and calm, a stark contrast to how he was when you first fucked on your couch…. speaking of; why are you both stood up still?
"No baby, they're not. I love them and what they do to me.. but I wanna see your rough side, please Steven."
You know he can't resist your begging, proven by the way he's pushing you to the floor in seconds and pulling your underwear down your hips and over your ankles with his own being kicked off in tandem.
"That's all i wanted to hear, dove, shit."
Expecting to feel his blunt tip pressing against your hole, you're instead surprised to feel his tongue running through your sopping folds and over your painfully sensetive clit. An embarrassing noise leaves your lips before you're clamping your hand over your mouth to contain the filth that threatens to spill past your lips; you love it when they give you head.
The man's tongue runs expertly over every inch of your throbbing cunt, making your hole clench around nothing as you grab a fistful of his hair.
"Oh baby- you know I love your tongue-"
Steven simply nods, the tip of his tongue teasing your entrance before he finally slides it inside, your warmth and taste engulfing his tongue and making him moan on you, which in turn vibrates through your nerves and makes you jolt against him.
His tongue sinks in and out of you repeatedly at expert speed, the base of it bumping against your clit in a way that makes you think that this man isn't even real, that he's instead an angel sent from heaven for your pleasure only.
Despite this, it's still not enough in Steven's opinion, and before you know it he's tucking his hands behind your knees and lifting you up the wall, pressing your spine against the cold hard brick.
It would be a painful position if your boyfriend wasn't distracting you with the pleasure spreading through your pussy and down your legs to your toes, the new angle exposing yourself to him in ways that you didn't even think were possible.
The manner in which he's holding you up against the wall and how well his tongue is working on you has you coming in minutes, shaking and crying out his name, thighs instinctively clamping shut around his head as his tongue sinks inside you one last time and you feel every nerve in your body resonate with pleasure.
"D'you think you can gimme another one, darling?"
His soft muffled voice brings you back to earth and you quickly release his head from the tight hold of your thighs with an apology. He lowers you down till you're face to face with him, big doe eyes looking at you intently as you feel his hard, leaking cock pressing against your swollen pussy lips.
You give him and shakey smile and nod as you wrap your arms around his neck.
"That's my good girl."
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producedbyhanjisung · 4 months
Text
⎯ POLAROID CHRISTMAS. christopher bahng chan
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🎧 : bang chan x female reader
TROPE. non-idol!au , roommates to lovers, christmas!au, fwb to lovers
WORD COUNT. 2.5K
WARNINGS. smut, some angst, mentions of abandonment, mom has a new husband and kids that she left her daughter for
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SYNOPSIS. chan is used to spending his christmas alone - his family lives in australia, and it's too expensive for him to fly home for the holidays. you, on the other hand, are definitely not used to spending christmas like this. after your newly-engaged mother decides to leave you for her new family for a trip to brazil for the winter months, you find yourself longing for a family of your own - and chan seems happy enough to provide one for you.
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SMUT WARNINGS. boudoir photography, voyeurism, slightly fingering (it's just touching ig), dirty talk, possessive!chan, dumbification, ownership things ig idk, pet names, use of "good girl", reader has a praise kink, unprotected sex, doggy style YUH, bdsm *ish (reader gets tied with ribbons), creampie
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If Chan is anything, he's the best roommate you've ever had.
You've thought about the fact many times - watching him cook breakfast for you, and raking your nails down his back twenty minutes later.
Either way - he's always been perfect. The two of you met in college, hit it off, and dated for a year. You agreed you were better off as friends, but continued to live together. You then decided that it was easiest to not have anything committal, but still be able to release some pent-up sexual tension on each other, so you became friends with benefits. The arrangement worked for both of you - it was easy, it was simple, and it wasn't difficult to walk three feet over to his room whenever you wanted a quick fuck.
Not only was he willing to fuck you into every wall of your shared apartment, but now, a year after you'd both graduated college, he remained as one of the best friends you'd ever had.
You realize this as the two of you sit on the couch of your small home. His arms are wrapped tightly around you, sheltering you from everything trying to bombard you as you sob into his chest.
You hear him muttering softly to you, running his fingers through your hair as you cry. His other hand rests lightly on your waist, pressing you close against him and keeping the blanket wrapped around you tight to your body.
"What am I gonna do?" you sob, voice muffled against his sweater. "I've never not gone home for Christmas. She hates me."
"She doesn't hate you," he mumbles. "She wants to spend some time with her husband, that's all-"
"Her new husband and her new fucking kids," you snap.
Chan pulls away from you, looking down at you. "Y/N . . ." He puts one hand on either side of your face, wiping away your tears with his thumb. "No one in their right mind would ever replace you. There's no way your mother has."
"She has," you say, sure of your conclusion.
"No she hasn't," Chan assures you. "Please, trust me."
You finally meet his eyes, face swollen. "Yes she has . . ." Your lip quivers, as if you're going to cry again, and Chan shakes his head.
"There's nothing I can do to convince you that she won't, but I can keep telling you. No one in their right mind would replace you."
"I already had the tickets home." Your lips sink into a pout, closing your eyes. "I told her I had the tickets and she still fucking left."
Chan watches you, tilting his head. "Why don't we both go?"
"Both go?"
He nods, tracing his thumb over your cheekbone. "It'd be nice to spend Christmas in the countryside. We'll spend it together - just you and me. Yeah?"
You nod, slowly. "Yeah . . ."
"Does that sound okay?"
You blink twice, letting his words sink in. "You wanna spend Christmas with me?"
"Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?"
You pause. Then, "Chan, you're really fucking amazing, you know that?"
He smiles, bringing you in for a hug. "I'll never be as amazing as you are."
⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ☆⭒
The next week passes rather monotonously, with only the reminder of yours and Chan's upcoming trip to your old family home in the countryside serving as your purpose to continue through your days.
The day finally arrived that the two of you would take the train to your home town. You wait at the door of your apartment, yelling, "Hurry the fuck up! It's leaving soon!"
Chan emerges from his room, dressed up in a winter jacket that's way too big for him and a scarf wrapped around his neck. "You look cute," he says as he gets closer to you.
"Cute can wait," you say, pushing him towards the door, "we have a train to catch!"
It's not long before you're both seated on the train, you falling slowly asleep as you stare out the window at the scenery passing by.
"Here," Chan says, taking notice of your sleepy eyes. "Lie your head on my shoulder. I'll put my scarf down so it's not so hard."
You oblige, too tired from rushing around the train station to argue with him.
It seems barely moments later that you're waking up at your stop, watching Chan pull your luggage down from overhead.
"Thanks," you mumble, taking it from him and pausing to wait. He follows soon after, and the two of you exit onto the platform. You trip slightly as you step off, but Chan wraps his arm around your waist and holds you up, helping you finish stepping over onto the platform.
"What a beautiful couple," a woman coming off after you says, smiling.
"Oh, we're not-"
"Thank you so much," Chan says, smiling at her.
"Merry Christmas, you two!" The woman called, walking away, and you're reminded that it's Christmas Eve.
As the two of you are walking away, you turn to him. "Why did you let her think we're a couple?"
He shrugs. "What's the harm? It was easier to say that than to explain what we actually are."
You roll your eyes, but follow him to the rental car you have waiting.
From the train station, it's only an hour drive to your old family home. Your mother grew up poor, but your father came from old money. Naturally, when his mother died, he - as the only child - inherited all of her worldly possessions. This included her land, including a massive manor in the countryside and a cottage, just a few miles away. When he and your mother divorced, he gave her the cottage in exchange for her taking care of you, and him not having to see you.
Chan pauses as the two of you approach. "This is where you're from?"
You nod grimly. "Yeah."
You give him a brief tour of the house, and finally end in the kitchen, sighing. "There's only one downside. There's only one bedroom."
"That's easy, I'll just take the couch."
You shake your head. "You have the bed. I'll have the couch."
He wags his finger in front of you, laughing. "No no no. Why don't we just share the bed, huh? It's not like we haven't before."
You cross your arms, staring at him.
"What?" He slinks closer to you, one arm looping around your waist. "Don't tell me you don't remember last week . . . when you were practically sobbing, begging for me."
You shake him off, rolling your eyes. "Yeah, alright. We'll share."
He grins, letting go. "I'm excited for this."
"For what? Christmas?"
"Mhm," he mumbles, pulling you back to him.
"Chan, come on . . ."
"Y/N . . ." he presses his face into your neck, smiling.
"Fucking nympho," you mumble.
"Hey!" he laughs, curling you closer. "I'm not."
"Then what do you want right now?"
He doesn't respond for a moment. Then, softy, he says, "I wanna fuck you . . ."
You roll your eyes. "See?"
"See what? I just want to give you something special in this holiday season." He smiles, pulling away for a second.
You push him off again. "If you wanna fuck me, then you have to catch me." You laugh as you take off down the hall, running up the stairs.
You hear him shout after you, but you barely register what he's saying. You run up the stairs, down the hall, and skid into your mother's old room, huddling into the closet. You take a soft breath as you hear Chan coming down the hall, searching the rooms. He opens the door to the room you're in, and you cover your mouth.
"Found you!" Chan crows triumphantly as he throws open the door of the closet you're inside. You laugh as he pulls you out of the small recess in the wall. "Which means . . . ?"
"Yeah, yeah, okay."
He grins, leaning in to kiss you gently. "You have such nice tasting lips."
"Really?"
He nods. "Mhm. Like . . . strawberries, maybe? But those really sweet ones."
You giggle, pulling your chapstick out of your pocket and holding it up so he can see. "I'm glad you like it."
"I like it very much," he mumbles, kissing you again. And again. And again. Until, suddenly, you're trapped underneath a shirtless Chan, your jeans discarded somewhere in the room and your makeup messy and smudged as Chan desperately traces his lips down your stomach, holding the backs of your thighs close in his huge hands.
"You taste fucking divine," Chan growls against your skin, biting your pelvic bone lightly. You jolt, and he grins up at you. "Did that hurt?"
"Felt good," you say, your voice barely above a whisper.
He smiles. "Good."
"Just relax, baby," he says. "Let me take care of you. Is that okay?"
You nod shakily, feeling him crawl back up your body. His fingers slip gently down your lower stomach, and your breath catches. He kisses you slowly as one finger rubs between your folds, not enough to cause friction, but enough pressure to make you feel something.
You worm around under him, reaching to rub yourself, but he shakes his head. "Hands above your head."
You sigh as you lift your hands so that they're draped prettily on the pillows above your head. Chan climbs off you and disappears into the hallway, coming back a moment later with a long blue ribbon. "It was gonna be part of your Christmas present. Wanna see you all wrapped up and pretty."
"So it was just a present for you?" you ask skeptically as he wraps it around your wrists.
He smiles. "Maybe, love."
You relax into the bed as he twirls the ribbon around you, gently lying over your breasts, your thighs, your stomach - it was all wrapped in a deep blue ribbon.
"Well aren't you just the prettiest thing I've ever seen," Chan mumbles, stepping back to admire his handiwork once he's tied off the last bow. "This is really hot."
You look up at him. "I can't move."
"Isn't that the point?"
You shrug as best you can, waiting a moment as he sits back and watches. "Y/N . . . can I . . . can I take a picture?"
"A picture?" your eyes widen at the question. All the times you and Chan have done stuff like this, he's never asked to document it.
"I mean, yeah . . . if that's okay with you. You look pretty, and, I dunno, I wanna remember this moment."
You blink up at him. "Uh, yeah. Sure. You can take a picture."
Chan breaks into a grin, standing and darting out into the hall. A moment later, he returns carrying a polaroid camera - your polaroid camera.
"That's mine," you point out.
He ignores you, holding up the camera so that it's pointed at you.
"Chan, when I said you can take a picture I assumed you meant on your phone."
"Do you mind that it's like this?" Chan peeks over the camera at you.
You watch him for a moment before responding. "No, I don't mind."
The photo is taken before you can even finish your sentence. Chan waits for the film to develop as it prints out of the camera, sitting down on the bed beside you. "You're so pretty . . ." he says softly, watching it.
"Chan, I appreciate how sentimental you're being right now, but my pussy is so wet I can barely register it. Can you fuck me?"
He grins, setting both the film and the camera on your bedside table. "Yeah, I can fuck you." He pulls your legs apart, maneuvering them so it won't disrupt the ribbon sequence, and audibly groans as he sees your cunt. Then, he stands and pulls his pants off, leaving both of you naked. "Gonna fuck this pussy until it can't remember anything but me. Until you can't say anything but my name."
You look at Chan. He'd never been so . . . possessive before. You kind of liked it.
He leans in close, the tip of his cock leaking against your stomach. "I want you to be mine." He sits up to look at you. "What are you?"
"Yours," you say softly, staring up at him.
"Good girl," Chan says, but you barely notice what he's saying, because at the same time, he thrusts into you hard, leaving him hilt deep, pelvis pressed against your own. You gasp, straining against the ribbons as you arch your back into him. "Look at that reaction . . ." Chan smiles. "So good for me, yeah? So good."
"S-so good," you say softly. "Only for you."
"Can I move a little?"
"No, wait, please . . . it hurts a little."
"I didn't prep you, baby," he mumbles, face moving to kiss your neck. "It'll feel good. Do you trust me?"
You whimper, nodding.
Slowly, he pulls out of you, his cock dragging along your inner walls. "Fuck," you whisper.
Then, he thrusts back in again, beginning to move at a steady pace. The pace starts slower, gentle, and he gets rougher and faster the louder your moans get.
"You're doing so well," Chan says softly. "Sit up for me, baby."
You do as he says, and you barely know what's happening before you're face down in your pillows, and Chan is inside you again, pounding harder.
"Oh, fuck, Y/N," he says, and you feel him peppering kisses along your shoulders. "Fuck you're tight. Every time I fuck you you're tight - how do you even do it . . ."
He's pussy drunk, you manage to think to yourself, not even beginning to comprehend that you, too, are drunk off of him.
"Chan," you mumble. "Chan, Chan, Chan." His name spills out of your lips like some ancient chant. Over and over, with every drag and thrust in and out of your body.
You couldn't even begin to form the words to tell him you're about to cum when you do, but when you do release, he knows. He cums quickly after you, the tightening of your walls squeezing every last drop of his seed into your cunt. Finally, you both slow. You collapse into him, breathing heavily.
Chan helps you lie down, then delicately begins to untie the ribbons holding you, releasing you from your bonds. When you're fully untied, he wipes you off with a warm washcloth (that he somehow managed to retrieve between taking off your bonds and putting them back in his suitcase) and lies back down next to you, wrapping the both of you in the plushiest blanket you've ever seen.
"Chan?" you ask after a moment of lying in silence.
"Hm?"
"What did you mean when you said you wanted me to be yours?"
He meets your gaze. "Exactly what it sounds like. I've been in love with you since college, Y/N."
You blink at him. "Since college?"
He nods. "Since college."
"Chan, you fucking piece of shit."
"What?"
"I've loved you since college too."
He smiles. "Really?"
"Why do you think I let you fuck me?"
"I dunno, I thought-"
"Not every guy with a nice face gets in my bed, you know."
"You think I have a nice face?"
"Shut up."
Chan grins, pulling you closer to him. "Merry Christmas, my love."
You smile, leaning into his warm embrace, and look out the window at the falling snow as it coats the trees outside. "Merry Christmas, Chan."
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AUTHOR'S NOTE. i hate this so much. merry christmas to everyone that celebrates it! i'm probably going to come back and edit this eventually but honestly i just wanted something to upload right now. let me know if you have any requests for fics! usually i try to get requests done within a day or two of seeing them, so feel free!! love you all!!
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clfixationstation · 4 months
Text
ships that make me go absolutely insane
Ranked from most insane to least
EREMIN (AoT: Eren x Armin)
the entire time I'm watching them my brain is "they're just like me fr" they make me feel as if I'm tearing apart. Oh the shared dream, the ruin, the raw honesty cutting through layers of deception, the way they end - it's too much. I saw myself so much in their dynamic something about queer childhood friends to lovers. something about living in that in-between...also aspec Eren real. You have NO IDEA how much analysis I've written about them. The slow corruption of their shared dream, the way Armin knew Eren best, the way Eren looks at Armin :( "And in the corner of your eye / I saw a dream that never died" - Aurora
Catradora (SPoP: Catra x Adora)
First canon queer ship I watched <3 both healing and painful at the same time, it tapped into something deep I had forgotten long ago. The sort of relationship where you're really close but there's a gap you both feel and won't address for fear of your own feelings and about losing each other (both eremin & catradora) but then they're able to actually close it!! To see each other as they are! Do you understand how much hope that offers?! To be seen and be told your fate is not tragic? I have also written so much analysis about them. "You're the only friend I need / Sharing beds like little kids / And laughing 'til our ribs get tough / But that will never be enough" - Lorde
Cassunzel (TTS: Cass x Rapunzel)
*gasp* a ship that isn't queer childhood besties to lovers? But bro the YEARNING. Oh it hurts so bad. Also the aesthetic is simply divine. I'm ranking it here because it was very impactful for me some years ago, though I'm not into it enough right now to deliver a thorough explanation. Also I'm pretty sure Cass is a canon lesbian? Massive W. idk, something about shipping noncanon queer ships that gets me. "I'm sick of the sun / Can't trust anyone" - Poppy
Nuts n Dolts (RWBY: Penny x Ruby)
Idk they just cared for each other so tenderly and then Penny died twice and Ruby couldn't save her either time. Ow ow ow. THE doomed yuri. I love to hc both of them as aspec, & both are very neurodivergent-coded (because that is what I am). I'm drawn to the comfort, security, warmth, and the angst. There's also just something very bright in their relationship that draws me in, similarly to eremin. seeing each other in such a golden light while resenting themselves perhaps? the way they look at each other & hold each other so dear? "A chance to share the world / To be a girl who finally felt alive" - Friend, RWBY
Bumbleby (RWBY: Blake x Yang)
Holy shit the yearning! Blake abandoning Yang AND THEN COMING BACK AND STAYING. Protecting each other :') Healing together. It's just so sweet and powerful I can't help but adore it. I remember watching the first 2 seasons when I was little before I knew gay people existed, and shipping them even then. ngl I really want to go rewatch earlier seasons through a sapphic angst/yearning lens. "I made a vow, I'm not alone / Not dying now, we're protecting our own" - Nevermore, RWBY
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steventhusiast · 6 months
Text
STWG daily prompt 18/10/23
prompt: costume
pairing/character(s): steddie
warning suggestive content! idk this just happened
-
"Not that I don't love this costume," Eddie begins once he and Steve close the front door of their apartment behind them, tugging Steve closer to him by the red puffer vest he's wearing, "Because believe me, I do."
He pulls him a little closer after the promise, keeping his gaze on Steve's own eyes as he speaks and only letting them trail down to his parted lips after he's done. The Marty McFly costume does look great on Steve, but it's just not what he was expecting after what Steve said a few nights ago.
"But I believe you promised me a 'special' one, and this just seems like a typical costume for Steve Harrington."
Being as close to Steve's face as he is, Eddie gets to see the red flush rise up his neck to his cheeks as he averts his gaze and bites his lip.
"Right." Steve mutters, looking vaguely anxious in a way that makes Eddie pause.
"What's wrong, baby?"
Steve sighs, and shakes his head in response.
"I was too nervous to wear it out. Didn't want people to judge me." He admits, and his eyeline meets the floor, chin tilted down. Eddie lifts a hand to hold his chin and guide it up so their eyes are locked again before he speaks.
"It was a gay bar, Stevie. Could've dressed in drag and no one woulda bat an eye."
"Too late now." Steve dismisses him, and attempts to walk away to throw his keys in the bowl by their shoe storage unit.
"Nuh uh uh," Eddie stops him by slipping a finger through one of the belt loops on the back of his jeans, "Come back here."
Steve huffs dramatically when he turns back around to look at Eddie.
"What."
"Just because the party won't see it doesn't mean it's not worth putting the costume on. I am very curious to see what had you so nervous, baby." Eddie encourages, and watches as Steve's lips quirk up into a tiny smile.
He's quiet for a second, and then.
"Okay." Steve says quietly, and swiftly walks off to their bedroom. Eddie goes to follow, but Steve calls through the door, "Wait in the living room!"
It's a fully forty five minutes later that Eddie hears the bedroom door open and close. He hadn't been expecting Steve to take that long getting changed, but the anticipation has been slowly rising. He knows that even if Steve comes out in a plastic trash bag, he'd still find him hot. So he's excited. Sue him.
But. He's been wearing his own halloween costume for a good five hours at this point, so he's started to take apart his own costume. Gone is the ridiculous pirate hat he's somehow not lost, loosened are the three separate belts, and untucked is the billowy shirt.
"Ready?" Steve calls from the hallway, and he sounds a little nervous.
"As I'll ever be!" Eddie calls back, straightening up in his seat and leaning a little so he'll be able to see Steve a second earlier. And then Steve walks through the doorway, a preemptive flush visible, and holy shit.
Eddie might pass away.
He starts at Steve's legs, trying not to openly gape at the sight of tall black stiletto heels paired with fishnet stockings. And then he drags his eyes up, trying not to imagine too vividly what pulling back the strap connecting to said stockings and letting it snap back against Steve's beautiful bare thighs.
And then he gets to the main event (in his opinion): the corset. It somehow looks better on Steve than it does on Tim Curry, even though Eddie can tell it's quite a cheap corset. It's tightened as much as Steve could manage on his own, and is accentuating a waist that previously Eddie's only been able to really see the dip of when Steve arches his back just so while he's seated in his lap.
He's pretty sure his mouth is watering. His boyfriend is so hot.
Finally. Finally. His eyes reach Steve's face. And he did not know Steve was capable of putting make up on like this. It's a little messy, but the bold eyeshadow is there, and the red lips that Eddie just knows will transfer and create a real mess when they inevitably make out later.
"What do you think?" Steve asks with nervous jazz hands.
"I think my boyfriend is hot as fuck." Eddie breathes out, and in a few seconds he's up and crowding into Steve's space, not quite kissing him but making sure his mouth is close enough that their lips brush with every word he speaks, "But I am glad you didn't wear this get up to the club. Every man with eyes would've been hitting on you."
"And we can't have that."
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harlowarchives · 7 months
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❝ 𝐥𝐮𝐯 SOUNDS!
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•₊˙ ◌ 🌷 -> listen to: luv ya gyal // love sounds by 𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐳 & to my bed by 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧!
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𝐁𝐄𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐄. this is smut, might get a little kinky. you have been warned!
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“Urban!” you yelled out your hands wandering along your back Urban walked into the room completely oblivious and slightly confused “Help me with this zipper.” You asked flipping your hair over your shoulder “Your best friend” cleared his throat walking up behind you and began trying to adjust your faulty zipper “Urban, it's not that hard come on I'm ready to go.” You roll your eyes “Alright y/n I won't be able to fucking fix it if you don’t stop— moving!” He grumbles using his hand to hold your hip “Stop moving y/n.” Urban says lowly, on his last tug your zipper falls all down revealing your lace bra and panties “Pick it up. Please.” You ask he places his hands on your hips you feel his fingers tremble against your sides “Um hm.” He obliges stepping back to take in the view “Or don't…” You say turning around “Hm?” He looks up you walk closer to him your dress falling lower with each step a nervous expression crosses his face. “What are you asking me to do again?” Urban asks looking away from you “Whatever it is that you'd like to do” The sight of you in your silk black dress exposing your breasts caused Urban’s bulge to harden his arms wrapped around your waist his hands palming your ass causing a chill to run down your spine.
He pulled the dress from around you forcing you against the wall of your bedroom now the two of you were so close together that you felt his member rub against your back his hands held yours together like cuffs letting go of your wrist he used one hand to loosen his belt the metal clanking making you twitch his jeans fall to the ground Urban uses his hand to arch your back, you snap in half like a popsicle stick then your panties are torn off you. His dick presses inside you, your walls loosening just the feeling of him forcing you to release a scream the pace started slow but picked up fast. His hand around your neck while he fucked you showing your insides no mercy the moment his hands touched your back you knew he could never be your friend because of the lust you felt having a simple conversation with him you knew he wasn't a friend. Your mascara and eyeliner runny from the hot tears, he lifts you carrying you over to the bed pressing your legs against your head. He kneels to your pussy his mouth at the level of your clit his lips wrap around yours sucking lightly on them his tongue began to roam your stomach causing your body to jerk his mouth makes its way back to your vagina his mouth sucking your clit.
Your body shakes from overstimulation his hands held your legs apart he was determined to make you cum, still in attempts to leave you shaking his fingers dug inside you reaching your G-spot with each thrust, his last thrust you came all over his fingers your body shaking and your face a hot mess, but he wasn't done with you yet. Urban stopped for a minute at the sound of your front door opening the sound of Jack’s voice made you jump up, “You guys take fucking forever let’s go!” Jack yells as you and Urban scramble around Jack walks over to your bedroom where you and Urban stood starting to walk behind each other “My bad I had to fix her zipper.” Urban says lowly “For an hour…” Jack mumbled Urban pulled you slightly behind him “We’ll talk about this later.” Urban nods at you “Who said anything about talking?” You grin as he palms your ass before Jack could turn around.
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🏷️ 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒 ⁱ : @lexxlovesjack @iknowdatsrightbih @iheartharlow @livsters @honeyharlows @killatravtramp @jackmanduh @itsyagirljaz
author notes : this is short and sweet or spicy idk 🤷🏽‍♀️ but i hope you enjoyed it, is this friends with benefits or friends…
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joohanisms · 27 days
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idk if you wrote about this before or not but thoughts on taking junhans virginity 😭😭😭
i haven't!!!!!!! tysm for the ask so i have an excuse to <33
(half written before i went ia)
mmm first of all i think hed actively look for someone inexperienced to date while hw himself was inexperienced
less space for disappointment yknow how could hw disappoint you when you kinda just .. dont know better literally
but then he ended up w you <3 who actually does have some experience and its kinda nervewracking for him, he's not gonna lie
he's been putting it off for so long – sure, it only took a couple of dates for you to make out and your hands to wander. the way he tentatively gripped your ass made you want him kind of desperately.
but it never went past that. a while later, when the topic of making things official came up, his cheeks blushed a deep red while he looked down at his feet.
"ah, before we, you know, start dating for real... i thought you should know." and fuck, you think. there it goes. there's the catch. "i'm not too... experienced. actually, i've never had sex before. i don't want you to be disappointed if we get to it and i'm not any go–" his mouth is sealed shut as you kiss him firmly, hands cradling his face.
"you're stupid. i don't care. nothing of what you just said would ever make me lose interest," he wants to avoid your eyes, hide his face, but the way you're holding his flaming cheeks in place won't let him. "at most, it just makes me happy i'll be your first."
and since then, he's been avoiding – more like procrastinating, to be fair – getting sexual with you. the most you've done so far was dry humping each other on his sofa while his apartment was empty (that is, until one of his roommates opened the front door and he jumped out of his skin).
you don't want to push him, so you wait for him to come to you.
(but if anyone asked you whether you were fingering yourself in the shower thinking about him, you wouldn't be able to deny it.)
the next time he got to escape from his dorm and visit you and your blessedly empty tiny apartment, he has you on his lap, the movie playing on your laptop long forgotten.
you didn't notice anything before – he was the same hyeongjun as always – but now you can see how his hands are shaking and how he keeps taking deep breaths seemingly out of nowhere.
you detach your lips from his, studying his face. this makes him more nervous, the poor thing. did he do something wrong? is he this easy to read?
"hyeongjun, are you okay? you look like you're going to pass out." you try to leave the comfortable seat that is his thighs, but his hands shoot up and grab your waist, holding you down.
"hyeongjun. you're shaking. have you eaten? let me grab you a cup of wa–"
"i'm fine."
"really? what did you have for lunch? did you have enough? or did you have too much?" you can't help but worry for him. he's already a skinny guy, but you can't be too careful knowing how much time he spends online.
"i swear i'm fine! i'm just..." he trails off, looking at everything in your room but you. one of his hands leaves your waist to fiddle with a loose thread on your comforter. once again, you wait for him to come to you – he likes that about you, how you leave him to find ways to express himself instead of dragging it out of him. his tone is soft when he eventually finishes, "i'm just nervous, that's all."
you cup his cheek in an act of comfort, looking at him like he's some kind of baby bunny, small and defenseless. he finds he doesn't mind it too much.
"nervous about what, baby? what's on your mind?"
"i was thinking," he finally lets go of your waist to play with his fingers, "maybe it's about time we, uh, you know, fuck."
jesus christ. your tummy does a backflip at his wording.
"you know i don't mind if we don't, right? i'm fine with how things are now." you slide your hand down his neck and shoulder, and some braincell vaguely makes him think that you're not doing anything to help him go against having sex.
"but i want to," his response is eager and he backtracks, "if you want it too, i mean."
your mind is so clouded with the thought of not only having him, but also to have you be his first, that you don't even respond before you're pressing your lips to his again.
" of course i do."
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golbrocklovely · 7 months
Text
i'm gonna make this post since i have like ten asks wondering my thoughts on it. and i don't really feel like repeating myself over and over again.
long story short, i'm disappointed.
so… snc did a video with elton and corey. they addressed the rumors that have been circulating about elton and the things he has done to snc, none of which were true. and i'm glad that that can finally come to a close and the death threats can calm down. bc while i never liked elton, he didn't deserve death threats.
but let me get into the video.
i don't feel like rewatching it, so if i get some things wrong, idc. but what i know for certain is that elton flat out said "the fans drove us apart and made me act the way i did." which, is just a flat out lie. HE started way back in late 2020/21. i have proof. i've seen it with my own eyes. i was literally there while he was tweeting out things against snc. if he is that easily persuaded, he should reconsider his career choices. fans took it too far, i'm not disagreeing with that; but to pretend that him and corey didn't shade snc for years and that the fans started a beef between them is ridiculous and incredibly incorrect. elton started a battle that he didn't think was gonna continue for as long as it did. he believed his ego and thought fans would side with him in his unjust belief that snc were copying him. and it didn't play out in his favor, so he just got more bitter and bitter over the years about it. once ppl started making up lies about him, something he had no issue doing to snc, that's when things went "too far".
again, did he deserve death threats for being petty? absolutely not. did he deserve lies to be made up about him? no. but do not pretend to be an innocent bystander in a war YOU started. you handled things publicly and then got pissed when the public had opinions. idk what you expected. snc didn't do anything to elton. they didn't copy him, they didn't take content that was his and change it around to be their own. that is something elton CLAIMED to have been the case. and now he tries to blame it on fans and that they were the ones that claimed that. his apology is null and void when he turns around and says "yeah i said some things i shouldn't have but it's actually the fans' doing that made me think that way." you are full grown adult man with multiple businesses. act like it.
and i cannot fathom under any circumstance why snc would ALLOW elton and corey back into their lives. they bad-mouthed you two for YEARS. they did it in front of fans on tour! they cultivated a fandom that was happy to see you guys fail or get called out. i get you feel bad that fans took things too far. that maybe you were petty too in some instances, that you could have reached out sooner. but YOU DIDN'T START THIS. they don't deserve loyalty or to be in your lives again bc fans were assholes! and you shouldn't want someone in your life that will believe a stranger over you. bc what is there to say that elton won't turn around and shit on you again? he obviously has issues talking shit out. what about the next time he thinks you slighted him? you think he's gonna be rational and act like an adult and talk to you? probably fucking not.
snc bitch time and time again about feeling used, that they always feel taken advantaged of. they keep their inner circle small bc they can't trust anyone. colby literally talked about not being able to date outside of the industry bc what if the girl he's with wants something from him. they do all of this complaining, only to bring elton and corey back in. two ppl who will only BENEFIT from being their friend again. they have been losing subs and followers for years now ever since they started this war. they have nothing to lose being your friend again. they will USE YOU.
it became very apparent to me that snc only want elton and corey back in their lives for memories' sake. they had a three hour conversation only to go back and talk about the good ol times. there's a reason why those moments are in the past. elton literally still sees you guys as the young 20 year olds he has to "take care of". he literally said he loveD you guys, past tense - bc now he hasn't hung out with yall in so long. and you want that back in your life bc you miss feeling young and have uncle elton around? let go of 2017. that was a life time ago. there is no reason to have this man back in your life. and same goes for corey. neither one of them even wished you well publicly when you were diagnosis with cancer or going thru chemo, colby! what about that screams good friend material??
i know i am one person with one opinion. you don't have to listen to me, and that goes for everyone reading this. if you're happy they're back together, that's great. good for you. but i will not be supporting any content that comes from elton/corey and snc. if they do a video together, go on a trip - i will not watch it. i don't care to see two men who i care about hang out with two other guys that literally wished them the worst for three years straight.
snc are allowed to make whatever choice they want. if they want these guys back in their lives, that's the choice they make. if they accept elton's apology, that's fine. but i will not support it. it is such a disappointing feeling to see the ppl you care about act like floormats personified. you guys are so desperate to be seen as good and positive and it is mind-numbingly annoying. who cares if you're an asshole sometimes?! set boundaries for christ's sake. and follow thru on them. stop listening to fans who have the attention span of a spoon and are only here bc they think you're hot.
…this goes into a longer issue i've had with snc for a while now. and that's that i'm no longer excited to be an avid watcher of them. everything that has happened this year was proof, to me, that they should have taken an actual, long term break, the moment colby got sick. they started out the year not even being with each other on colby's bday. and even before that you could tell something was off with the two of them. it was clear colby wanted a break, was aching for one, and sam was the one that wanted to jump right back into work the moment the new year started. then colby got diagnosed, then sam and kat broke up, then colby went thru chemo, then sam needed to get his shit sorted out so he went to therapy (and still very much needs it). then they celebrated colby being cancer free and jumped back into the amount of work they were used to doing. this doesn't even take into account that colby never got time to recover from even realizing HE HAD CANCER, or the fact he was working all while going thru chemo and before that too. they NEVER took a break. taking a week off to black out in japan doesn't count. they are so obsessed with working and numbers, it's not even funny.
and then this podcast with kris… while i did enjoy it, it became very clear to me that snc are really only making content anymore for views and money. and look, get your coin, this is your job after all. but at what point do you start making content you actually enjoy making? bc the moment they shitted on 25x25, something they very much loved when it was happening, that was enough proof that they only care about views and money anymore. the only reason they stopped that WAS bc no one watched it. and ppl didn't stop watching it bc it was inauthentic. you were travelling during a deadly pandemic… what did you expect fans to do?? not to mention you cold turkey-ed content that ppl signed up for (haunted stuff). of course the views are gonna plummet. it wasn't bc the editing was weird and new, which is what yall love to latch onto even to this day. you guys were so excited for that content, and now shit on it bc it's become the joke to the fandom, half of which wasn't even here when you made that content.
you collab with ppl no one even cares to see you with bc you know it will bring in views. who the fuck wants to see yall and bella poarch at the conjuring house??? none of these collabs make sense anymore, unless you just want to get views. all the content you have put out this year has been mediocre at best. you talk about quality over quantity but really should have just considered not working and taking a break since one of you was literally going thru fucking cancer.
i just feel so deflated. i'm not even excited for the conjuring house. i don't care about hell week. i can't even be pissed that sam is barely helping with the edit still. none of this fucking matters anymore.
yall don't care, so why should i?
do whatever makes you happy, i guess. but don't complain when you realize it doesn't, bc i'm not gonna be here to hear it.
also, if any of you get pissy at me bc you feel like this is a good thing and you want to see them collab and i'm taking it too far... respectfully, i don't give a single shit about your opinion. have yours, i'll have mine.
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bingoboingobongo · 1 year
Text
task force 141 + christmas wishlists
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Characters: Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, John Price, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra
Warnings: none
A/N: ewww i have finals tmmrw
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rodolfo "rudy" parra:
alright so i mentioned this in my stocking stuffers headcanon but we're gonna go in more depth here
rudy's christmas wishlist is really just legos
but like big, expensive lego sets
like i said then, he always compiles a big list of sets he wants each year
this year he's obsessed with the technic/vehicle sets
he got the vespa set for his birthday so that one was crossed off the list
and now he's looking to collect all the ferrari sets
last year he nabbed the ferrari 488 gte "af course #1"
and this year he wants the ferrari daytona sp3
he really likes the technic sets because their like a harder version of the normal lego sets
plus they're a lot more durable which is important to him
he has all his lego sets lined up on shelves around his apartment
and he already has a shelf of lego vehicles
which currently includes the ferrari 488, the vespa, and the lamborghini sián fkp 37 (he bought that for himself after he got a pay raise)
and ofc once he gets all his luxury cars/racecars collected, he plans on moving onto the classic cars collection
john "soap" mactavish:
alright so idk why this headcanon brings me so much joy but it does
but soap really really really wants a dirt bike for christmas
he rode one during a mission around summer time
and ever since then he won't stop raving about how cool it was
if we're being honest he wasn't that good at it
but honestly that just motivated him even more because now he wants one so he can get better at riding it
he wants to be able to do all those crazy flips and tricks they do
and he spends soooo much time researching bikes and watching videos of the tricks
he also doesn't even know when he would get the chance to use it
or where he would practice
since his house is not exactly near prime dirt biking terrain
but he insists he'll figure something out
his dream is definitely the yz250
he just thinks it looks so cool and sleek
but it's like ~$7000 so he doesn't have his hopes up
would definitely implode if he got it tho
john price:
alright so for christmas price really wants a weighted heated blanket
i mean can you blame him?
it gets pretty cold up in his cabin and he just wants to be able to be all warm and cozy
he honestly didn't even realize it was a thing until gaz told him about it
and now he won't stop talking about it
like he keeps hinting about how he wants it
saying things like "god it's cold in here, a nice heated blanket would be great huh?" or "my blanket is getting so thin, one of those weighted blankets would be insane huh?"
what can i say he really wants one
but he also doesn't wanna spend like $100 on one
which is why he's being so coy about it
besides a weighted heated blanket price wants cigars
i mean he always wants cigars but he wants them as a christmas gift this time
he wants really fancy ones that are really high quality
honestly his ideal holiday evening is him on the couch, with warm socks, a tea, a cigar, and his weighted heated blanket and a nice movie on the tv
simon "ghost" riley:
this year (and every year really) simon wants books for christmas
he's a fan of classic literature so he really just wants paperbacks of all the classics
paperback because it's easier to bring on missions
like i said in one of my past headcanons, i think simon was definitely an english literature major in college
so he definitely has a lot of books already
but let's be real you can never have too many books
the books on his wishlist this year include the metamorphosis by franz kafka, journey to the center of the earth by jules verne, and the picture of dorian gray by oscar wilde
okay we're gonna go off on a tangent here
but simon secretly wants to open up a bookstore when he retires
except, and this is gonna get kinda sad here, he knows it's ultimately just a pipe dream bc the chances of him retiring are really slim
yk since he's more likely to be killed in action...
but he still likes the idea of it in case he does make it out of the military alive
kyle "gaz" garrick:
alright so for christmas gaz wants new headphones and a speaker
gaz just lives his life with a soundtrack in the background what can i say
he loves listening to music whenever he can
whether he's working or training or in the shower
i like to think that he used to actually have a really nice set of earbuds
and he usually keeps them in one of the pockets of his uniform
but when he fell out of that helicopter he lost his earbuds
and he was absolutely devastated too because they were so nice
but this time around he wants headphones so that he can really take advantage of the noise cancelling feature
probably not the smartest option considering he's in the military but yk what sometimes gaz just needs a break from the outside and honestly who doesn't?
he also has a really nice speaker but then soap broke it
gaz had it next to him on the couch while he was watching tv or smthing
and then soap sorta hopped over the back of the couch to sit next to him
and then sat straight on the speaker
and since the couch at the base sucks and is therefore pretty hard
plus the fact that soap is probably like over two hundred pounds of muscle
the speaker really had no chance
so yeah gaz really just wants his music back for christmas
and off topic but he's into a lot of oldish hip hop/rap rn
like the notorious b.i.g., ice cube, 2pac, dr. dre
yk sorta like the classics
(im ngl idk if those are classics music genres confuse me)
alejandro vargas:
this year alejandro wants a ps5
maybe this is coming sorta out of left field but i feel like alejandro is lowkey a gamer
which ik doesn't make sense since we've established he's into self care and gamers never shower
jkjk no hate to any gamers im sure most of y'all have tolerable self hygiene
but yeah alejandro is actually super into video games
he has a lot of consoles but he didn't get the ps5 when it first came out so now he wants it
im gonna go off on a few alejandro video game tangents here so get ready
first off i think he and rudy played "a way out" together with no prior knowledge of the game
and so at the ending they were absolutely devastated
they also play overcooked a lot
and they let the other task force members play too
it's always interesting because alejandro takes it really seriously
and so he gets soooo stressed about it it's kinda amusing
also he's super good at super smash bros
and surprisingly he's not really a fan of first person shooter games (ironic i know)
it's just that he does that so much in real life he doesn't want to do it in games too
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