#idk whats up but i feel really really fucking bad

[screampied]

hey i LOVE your work and ykk ou ur toji is just like… UGHHHH

could you do a mean toji who just mocks the reader and makes fun of her while she gets off on him (like idk his thighs or whatever) or when he fucks her? i feel like you would write this very well;)

❤︎ ໋𓈒 toji mocking your moans while you ride him

warnings. fem! reader, thigh riding & cowgirl, dirty talk, praise, ōrgasm denial, breath play, spanking. + thank you sm !! mdni

“we’re quite handsy today, huh,” he’d mumble once his eyes flicker down towards your nude body—you suck in a single breath as he’s got you just barely straddling his lap. with an unsatisfied pout, you’re just here moving up and down against his beefy thigh—oh so desperately wishing that you were riding him instead of his stupid, stupid leg. toji’s amusement only fuels the more you frown and scowl, pawing your hands up his perfectly chiseled thighs before he snickers. “what’s the issue? my thigh not enough to satisfy the pretty girl?”

“no..” you immediately say, throwing your arms around his broad shoulders. he could hear the irritation linger on your tone before you bury your face into his neck . . a good waft of his loud cologne scent infiltrating inside your nostrils.

two rugged hands drag down your back, sending you multiple shivers from his touch before he replies in a hoarse tone. “well, that’s too damn bad,” and his chortling laugh only makes you throb from how close it’s against your ear—fuck. “actually, y’know what. i feel like bein’ nice today, baby. you want more than my thigh? how ‘bout ya jus’ ask me nicely.”

“but—”

“but—nothin’ girl, now speak,” toji utters, feeling your grinding against his thigh—grabbing your chin softly before making you stare him right in the eyes. he slyly grins, a thumb tracing down your dampened lip. “i’ll wait.. talk to me nice, girl.”

your eyes avert towards his dick, just laying there on his stomach—so ridiculously lengthy, a mere tannish color coats it - including his leaky tip that stares right back at you.

it looks so good, you wanted him inside so bad that it hurts—he could tell too, you found it hard to stay still as you made a cute attempt at rutting against him once more.

“i— i want you, ‘toji,” you claw at his body with doe lit eyes, his swollen base—so full of unused seed that you desperately yearned for it to be inside of you, filling up your pretty little womb. “want you s'bad.”

“oh i know you do, babygirl,” he rasps, he can’t help but notice the sudden boner that makes his jaw tighten. coarse big hands grip both of your hips before he gawks at you with that same tantalizingly smug grin. “can’t just spoil ya all the time though, talk more for me. i like listenin’ to that needy voice.”

ugh, you start to grow impatient and he only laughs at your sheer annoyed expense.

“please,” you murmur out in a whiney tone, slowly wrapping your clammy fingers around his length. he doesn’t stop you, he lets you touch all over him, aligning yourself with the fat weight of his cock that was just aching to be buried within you. “i wanna ride you so bad, ‘toj. need it, need your cum.”

“girl you don’t need . . . shit,” he swallows, a cold sweat breaking onto him.

you’re fucking hot—especially whenever you just take what you want, toji could have creamed his pants at just your voice and your voice alone.

you had him so hard, he sucks his teeth in total exasperation before he feels you slowly start to sink him down. “fuck, y’er such a little brat,” he mutters, feeling the warmth of your walls swallow him whole. it was a moist feeling, you were already a bit soaked—purely from riding his thigh for how many minutes, you weren’t even sure anymore, nor did you even relatively care. “ride me then, do y’er fuckin’ worst then.”

“shut up and i will.” you snap back.

he rolls his eyes, feeling your ass thrash against his lap and it makes him squeeze the plush mounds of your rear.

“eh, i really don’t like that mouth,” and he spanks you harder, this time it stings and you moan—he’s so thick that your stomach starts to seize once you feel him gradually reach into the depths of your pussy. “when you ride me, there shouldn’t be any back talk, girl,” and he grabs your chin for the nth time, pressing a sweltering wet kiss right onto your glossed lips. “. . . are we clear or do i gotta let this pussy know what goes ‘round here.”

…so cocky,

you gnaw at your lip—fighting back the urge to roll your own eyes backwards before you thrust against him harder.

it’s relentless, the brutal skin-to-skin contact makes a raw moan harshly yank from the back of your throat as your hands continue to claw on his chest.

his bare chest that was already glistening with droplets of sweat. he was so toned, his pecs—his nipples that were swollen and a sheeny pink color, you even attempt to lean in to lap your tongue against his nipple but he lightly shoves you back.

“leave those alone, slut,” and you conceal back a laugh—by 'those', he was most likely referring to his tits broad pecs. “ride me, ‘n hurry up. ‘m gonna fall asleep at this rate.”

toji never knew how to simply shut the fuck up, such a talkative man—whispering filthy sweet nothings into your ear as you’re taking every thick inch of his cock. he stretches you out so good that you’re already whimpering, eyes goggling profusely at the way his angry tip just thwacks and thwacks against your g-spot. “s-shiiit, toji,” you’d curse out in a sharp breath, continuing to drag your hips further against him at such a pace.

in and out, in and out, you’re rotating your waist a bit before he grunts lowly, head throwing back and he smacks your ass yet again, and again, and again. “fuck yeah, ride me jus’ like that. such a good girl, takin’ this dick like the good girl you are, mhm.”

“t—tojiiiii,” you’d mewl out right against the flapping shell of his ear. your cunt felt so stuffed, a straining exhale snatches from your lungs before you whimper once his base kisses against your ass. his base was so full, you only imagined how much build up cum was stored in there just for you.

“t—tojiiiiiii,” he mimics your tone as you mash against him, the sofa he sits on sinking down a bit from both weights combined. you pout once he starts mocking you, a gruff laugh dies from his throat before he squeezes your right ass cheek. “feels good, yeah? keep moanin’ for me like that.”

“shut up, s-shut uppp,” you moan, burying your face into his neck. doing so, you get a concise whiff of his cheap cologne and it smells so good. you’re a mess, spasming as your stomach continues to seize before he grabs both of your hips so that you could slam down onto him even harder. “close, toji. ‘m really close, fuck.”

he groans, feeling the hefty weight of his balls smack against your skin each time you move up, then down, then up . . . all over again. toji’s a big guy, it was no secret. the way your pussy constricts around his length, paving way for more movement . . . simply hypnotizing.

“yeahhh,” he snarls, strong hands still attached to your ass. green irises of his dilate, his eyes turn hooded for a second as he glances back at you. an entire mess, tongue all lolled out and you’re feeling it steadily about to approach. “look so fuckin’ dumb,” he points out with a subtle head shake, grabbing your chin again. “my dumb baby,” he corrects himself and your pout softens.

he’s so fucking big— you’ll point this out a million times if you have to, the stretch was so immaculate.

toji groans, pressing another saturated kiss onto your lips and you taste a brief mixture of his saliva and alcohol—presumably rum, you lean into his touch before feeling his big hands snake near your neglected tits. his growing stubble tickles against your face as you quicken your pace. so good, so fucking good.

all you can think about is that you’re getting off, you’re about to finish— gush out so much, you feel a familiar pit in your stomach arise. he feels you starting to shake and twitch, it’s cute.

“. . easy, now,” he teases, finding it adorable how whenever your orgasm approaches—you’d be an entire mess, pussy convulsing all on his cock as if it was the first time you ever took him. “oh my just look at that pout,” he points out, reaching towards your chin before bringing you all up close towards his face. not to mention, toji’s so pretty up close—ten times more intimidating with his low hazy eyes and wide sleazy smile. “such a baby. want me to talk ya through it?”

“p—please,” you whine, barely even giving him a chance to finish his seductive sentence.

with a playful eyebrow furrow, he makes you grind against him even harder. the sofa creaks and you squeak out a whimper, feeling yourself about to make such a mess. “please, please,” he copies your tone again, and it’s so embarrassing. toji purposely pitches his tone to sound like you and he snickers at the growing glare on your face. “please what, babygirl?”

with an irritated grumble, your flimsy arms still thrown over him, you moan out a desperate, “please let me c-cum. toji, i want it s’bad, pleaseplease let me be a messy girl.”

“. . . ahhhh,” he parts his lips, and he’s oh so dramatic, flickering his eyes towards the ceiling as if he’s deep in thought. “let me think about it.”

you didn’t know how much you could take, you’re sopping wet and his raspy deep voice that was right up against your earlobe doesn’t make things any better.

jagged breaths rip out from your esophagus as your shaky limbs could barely keep themselves up. he cackles, feeling your soft quavering lips kiss near his face, brushing against the scar that runs near the right lower part of his lip. it twitches as a response from your touch, how cute..

“hurry the fuck up then, lay it all on me,” he finally grunts, witnessing the way your dilated irises light up at his sudden permission— you whimper out, finally coming undone and it’s like a rough wave that crashes over you. the calm before the storm, once it comes, you’re left pulsating with his thick dick still buried inside of your cunt. you hug him tight with your walls like a vice, never wanting to let go. “you make such the silliest noises, girl.”

“s— shut up,” you moan, the under parts of your thighs aching heavily as you’re still in the midst of your teeth-shattering release. it feels so good, your maw drops and the contracts inside of your pussy only duplicates. it’s mouth watering, you grind against him just slightly and he spanks your ass, head going back. “i- i love you, toji.”

“i love me too,” he jibes with a cocky grin, sweat beads racing down the sides of his brow. you shoot him a glare and he rolls his eyes for the nth time. “. . kidding,” and he plants a kiss near your forehead, rough hand still attached to your right ass cheek like velcro. “i love you too, sweetheart.”

you’re still panting, but he’s clearly not done talking— it’s toji, figures.

“now bend the fuck over,” he grouses, eyes gazing towards your ass— a tongue goes against his lips like he was preparing for an appetizing meal. “i’m not finished. we gotta work on that lazy arch of yours, girl.”

#★vegasbaby. #toji x reader #toji smut #toji fushiguro smut #fushiguro toji x reader #toji x you #jjk smut #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jjk x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujustsu kaisen x reader #anime smut #female reader #dilf toji #toji fushiguro x reader #cw sex mention

[ellecdc]

Ooooo Mother, i'll do one better!!

What about the boys (established relationship) being needy over reader?? Like something she does or says or wears.

ooooooooof good one babes

okay, mature content ahead: viewer discretion is advised

James:

you come down the stairs to the Gryffindor party looking like that

certified simp, there would be no question what was going through his mind when he get's needy like this

glassy eyes just ogling you

following you around like a lost puppy - his friends would joke that you had him on some invisible leash

probably has a hand on you at all times

I see him getting a little whiny: "can we go now?" "the party's almost over, right?" "they won't miss us for a few minutes?"

whatever ends up happening afterwards is rushed and frantic - it's very obvious how absolutely desperate he was for you

Sirius:

you come down the stairs to the Gryffindor party looking like that

I don't think he lets you make a full round of the party before he's pulling you up to his dorm and locking the door

"Siri! I was talking to Emmeline!"

He'd scoff at you as he started shedding his clothes. "You come down stairs looking like that and expect me not to want to jump your bones immediately? Fuck, look at you; who even gave you permission to look this good, huh?"

idk about you but that sentence alone would have me in a puddle

ravishes you - you both look like a right mess afterwards

he takes about 30 seconds to revert back to his dishevelled rockstar appearance (which is so unfair because it took you a little longer to get ready tonight)

he dutifully helps you get redressed - the whole nine yards. Hair, makeup, outfit; though he makes sure some of the marks he's decorated your skin with are visible... "they compliment the ensemble, doll face"

Remus:

you come down the stairs to the Gryffindor party looking like that

he's got a good pokerface, but there'd be signs

he'd be a little quieter during conversations - most of his attention placed on you, one of his hands would be near his mouth as he played with his lips (like a nervous tick, almost like he really wants a cigarette right now)

but this man's M.O.? Get you feeling just as needy as he is

he would ask you to dance - and it'd be sinful: your back pressed up against his front as your hips sways in sync to the beat

his hands would be all over you: running up and down your thighs, slipping under the skirt of your dress, arms wrapping around your middle, gentle kisses pressed to your ears and neck

he'd have you so wound up and when you finally turn in his lap to ask him if he wanted to go upstairs, he'd smile at you and say "great idea, dove. I don't think they'll miss us for a little while."

get's exactly what he wanted and somehow it had been your idea

Regulus:

you come down the stairs to the Slytherin party looking like that

I think it would piss him off a little bit, quite frankly - how dare you come down stairs looking that good and acting like you weren't knocking the wind out of Regulus? (and likely every other partygoer there)

I think because he's feeling slightly jealous/a little peeved at you, he'd keep his distance at the party; but you would feel his eyes on you all night

his predatory gaze watching you as you navigate the party, sending threatening glares at anyone getting too close or was looking for too long

finally as the party is dying down, you're halfway through a conversation with Dorcas when you feel a looming presence behind you

"We're leaving." He says simply, taking your elbow and ushering you towards the dorm rooms.

you try to scold him for interrupting your conversation and rudely dragging you away from the party

he narrows his eyes and looks you up and down: "you don't get to show up to the party looking like sex on a stick and then berate me for finally getting you alone"

you smirk at him. "if you wanted me alone so bad, all you had to do was ask"

"Well, here I am." "I'm all yours, reg"

Barty:

you come down the stairs to the Slytherin party looking like that

your foot has barely hit the last step before you're hastily thrown over Barty's shoulder and he's running to his dorm room

"But Barty! The party!"

"Fuck the party! There are more important things to do."

you guys never make it back to the party - a shame too, you really liked that dress....the one that was since ripped off of your body and sat in a pile on the floor

"Don't worry treasure, I'll buy you 40 more of those dresses; though I can't promise they won't end up in the same state"

#marauders era #marauders au #marauders fanfiction #reader insert #self insert #sirius black #remus lupin #james potter #regulus black #barty crouch jr #james potter x reader #james potter x you #sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #regulus black x reader #regulus black x you #barty crouch jr x reader #barty crouch jr x you #headcanons #marauders headcanon #ellecdc fics

[ilwonuu]

video games

ִ ࣪𖤐 han jisung

༝༚༝༚ pairing- best friends with benefits, nonidol!han x fem!reader, meanishdom!han x sub!reader

༝༚༝༚ synopsis- your fuck buddy best friend knows the perfect way to cheer you up when you have a bad day;)

༝༚༝༚ warnings- pure fiction!!, reader has a bad day, PURE smut lol, filming sex, unprotected sex(I KNOW,,,), creampie(yum) lots of kissing, lots of dirty talk (jisung is guilty), kinda mean han but he’s overall a sweetheart (i love him bye), they’re lowkey in love but,,,multiple positions, fingering(f receiving), oral(f receiving), big dick hannie<3, MDNI, lmk what else!!

༝༚༝༚ a/n- why do i never proof read idk but literally the title has nothing to do with the fic lmfao??? this was all over the place what??? also i kinda wrote this for my own horny thoughts,,,anyways please send any your hard thoughts im in need of them!!!!

work was awful. you were beyond glad to be away from that hell of an place. you wanted to just curl into a ball. you had a better idea though, why not invite over your best friend? well what would you call this relationship? he’s your best friend,,,he has been for a decade. you guys do fuck sometimes but hey! what are best friends for? as soon as you shower and change into comfy clothes you immediately look for your phone.

once you find it you see you already have a text from him. reading “miss you. u didn’t text me after work:(“ you laugh as you can see the pout from the text. you smile and click on his contact calling him. he takes less than two seconds to pick up. “finally! where have you been? i miss you.” you smile mindlessly.

“i had a bad day- but here you are cheering me up.” you laugh a little as you lay back more. “what happened? talk to me, you know you can.” his tone more serious as you hear shifting through the phone. “no-no it’s nothing. people are just assholes to workers. but enough about that please! i really need you to come over now.” he chuckles deeply. “why would i need to come over baby?” he knows exactly why you’re asking him to come over he just wants to hear you say it.

“hannie- i need you to fuck all the anger and sadness out of me. is that what you wanted?” you can sense his smirk through the phone. “okay baby- i’m leaving now.” he hangs up the phone quickly. you sigh in relief as you throw your phone somewhere on your bed. you suddenly get butterflies thinking of the boy being so close to you again. this little- situation you had has been going on for a few months now. you two agreed at first to not get feelings involved but how could you not?

he’s your best friend, you know every little thing about him. and now he’s fucking you,,,so what did you think would happen. a bad idea to begin with. you are definitely in love with him. you have come to terms with it. you are fine with that and a little part of you thinks he feels the same.

he’s been acting different towards you. he’s been more touchy and just more needy in general. you are more than loving it. you are taken out of your thoughts when you hear a knock on your front door. you almost run to the door opening it. “hi.” you say with a smile. he smiles back pulling you into a hug.

“i want to make sure you’re actually okay before we just do this. i want you to talk to me if you need to.” he rests his head against yours as he rocks you in his arms. “i love you jisung.” you sigh into his arms.

“i love you more.” you pull away from the hug and smirk at him playfully. “okay now fuck me.” you smile at him innocently. he shakes his head at you laughing. “you’re so needy baby.” you lead him into your bedroom. “i’m not as needy as you.” you give him a playfully glare as you lay on the bed. “i know we’ve been having sweet sex- but i want mean hannie back-“ you pull him down to kiss your lips. he his already dominating your kiss with a hungry pace. his hand that isn’t holding himself over you is roaming your body. not leaving a single part of your beautiful body untouched. he pulls awhile after a deep kiss.

“fuck what are you doing to me.” he grunts out after taking a look at you. you don’t know what he means behind his words but you moan anyways. “hannie- why are you so-slow!” he flips your body so you’re laying on your stomach, careful not to hurt you. he looks at you again and realizes you’re wearing his hoodie. “keep the hoodie on.” he smacks your ass without warning causing you to moan.

“shit you like that baby?” you nod back at him. he leans down to kiss your neck in response. “take these off for me.” he tugs at your panties as he works at his own pants. you pull your panties down your legs throwing them across the room. you turn back to see your best friend in his shirt only. “baby lay back.” he smiles as he leans in between your legs. his grip is tight against your thighs as he spreads your legs wider. he looks up at you through his eyelashes. “do not move. got it baby?” his expression in innocent but his act is sinful. he licks a stripe from the side of one of your thighs to your clit. you shudder under the sensation. he looks up at you. his gaze is threatening as he pulls from you.

“you moved baby- i didn’t even fucking start and you already can’t take what i’m giving you.” he looks at you with a mocking expression as he starts eating you out roughly. you try not to move as he devours you. he watches you the entire time his mouth is against your cunt. “oh- fuck hannie-“ you throw your head back in pleasure as he spreads your legs as far as they can go.

he watches you try to close your legs but his grip just gets tighter. he pulls away from your cunt with a smile. his lips and chin is covered in your arousal. “get back on your stomach.” he smacks your thigh signaling you to turn over. you turn back onto your stomach pulling the hoodie up more so he can see more of you. “look at my beautiful girl. can’t wait to ruin you baby.” he rubs your ass gently, leaving soft kisses against your neck. you moan at his words. he called you his. you are going to die right on this bed. you’re brought out of your soft thoughts and right back to your hard thoughts as han rubs the head of his dick against your folds.

“you’re so fucking wet.” he chuckles in disbelief as he rubs your pussy with two fingers. he pushes them inside fucking you with them. “hannie- p-please.” you cry as you relax into his touch. “please what?” he speeds up his fingers earning a loud whine from you. “y-you know what- j-just fuck me.” he shakes his head.

“all this whining for what? just for dick. tell me you want it.” you shake your head as you feel defeated. “come on say it. i want to hear your pretty mouth say it.” you turn your head to look at him fully. he leans down to capture your lips in another kiss. “just say how much of slut you are for my dick and i’ll fuck you like one.” you clench around his fingers as he pulls them out of you. “say it and i’ll give you a little reward. hm? how does that sound?” he smirks at you as you lay your head back against the mattress.

“i want your cock soo- bad hannie. want you to fuck me dumb pretty please?” you wiggle your ass a little to entice him and he pulls your body closer to him against the bed. “wait hannie- can i film this?” you say in almost a whisper feeling nervous for his reaction. he smiles at you grabbing your phone from your bed. “fuck- yes. of course you can.” he watches you prop up the phone at the perfect angle to show where he’s lining up with you. you relax after setting up the phone feeling another wave of excitement jolt through you as he lines up with you.

“you ready baby?” he looks down at you, pushing in when he receives a yes from you. “fuck- me. you’re so deep-“ he laughs at you as he rubs your sides softly. “i haven’t even pushed in all the way baby.” you roll your eyes at him even though he can’t see your face fully. “what an asshole, i love him.” you thought as you feel him bottom out. you feel him start to fuck hard as he grips your hips. “ah- such a good girl. look at this fucking pussy.” he grabs a handful of you hair making you to arch your back. “hannie- so g-good.” you let a tear escapes your eye.

“yea? fuck take it- just like that.” his grip on your hair tightens when he watches your ass bounce with his thrusts. the camera is getting the perfect side angle. jisung’s moans are the loudest thing in the room. his breathy groans and moans making your high come quicker. he stops suddenly holding your hips. “fuck i’m sorry i need to see you when you come.” he helps you turn back on your back. he doesn’t waste anytime to push into you again. he starts fucking you at a quicker pace. “f-fuck.” you are crying as you start to feel dumb under him.

“you said you could take it. what now? feels too good?” he teases you leaning down to kiss you. he makes out with you as he fucks you into oblivion. he pulls away from the kiss after a couple minutes(ya man can last long), his hips stuttering.

“i’m gonna fucking cum. want it? tell me where you want it slut.” he grabs your face making you look him directly in the eyes. “i-inside hannie- please- w-want it so bad.” more tears fall from your eyes as you clench around him. “such a good girl.” his smirk is mocking you as he kisses your head. you see stars as you cum on his dick. “s-shit- why are you so fucking perfect? can’t get enough of you.” he gives you a few more thrusts until he’s filling you up. he lets out a breathy moan slowly pulling out of you. “made a mess baby.” he leans down to kiss you before cleaning the two of you. he pulls you fully on top of him.

“do you feel better?” he plays with your hair and leaves soft touches against your back. his touch is relaxing you just as you needed. “so much better hannie.” you look up at him and he’s already looking down at you. “i love you jisung.” you sit up a little as your words leave your mouth. “i-i love you more than you know.” he smiles as you lay back against his chest. he shuffles a little bit grabbing an object from under him. he grabs your phone to see it still recording.

“we we’re still recording-“ he stops recording putting your phone next to you. he laughs with you as you joke about having to edit out the aftercare. you shift in his arms getting more comfortable. he helps you fall asleep with more back rubs. you can always count on him to make you forget about what you were even upset about. oh and you can NOT wait to watch that video when u wake up hehe,,,

#Spotify #skz han jisung #skz han #han jisung smut #stray kids han #han smut #han jisung #skz smut #skz imagines #skz scenarios #skz #skz x reader #skz fluff #skz fanfic #stray kids fic #stray kids smut #stray kids jisung #stray kids #skz jisung #jisung x you #jisung x reader #jisung imagines #jisung smut

[lexirosewrites]

Okay, so, Slick Sunday!

(I had a nap and I totally forgot that was today, help)

I recently read a fic where if you were abused as a kid you could be either a early presenting Alpha, or a Late presenting Omega, and therefore those were bad things

So my brain got working on it, and then swerved to the left by presenting me with (and I know this is going to sound kinda weird, but please stick with me):

Early presented Alpha! Eddie meets and accidentally triggers Omega! Steve's presentation as kids.

And bc they're kids I HC that since their bodies aren't really developed heats and ruts are more like a really intense desire to cuddle, you know?

So it's these two kids who meet at a park without any parents around start cuddling in a bench and bc instincts are strong™ they bond.

Cue to the Harringtons putting Steve into heavy suppressants at 10 bc breaking a bond at that age could potentially kill him.

But still the shock of the whole thing makes both Steve and Eddie forget who they bonded with and therefore we can add so much angst to their highschool years together, like, they both feel the pull to teach other, but Eddie thinks he just has a dumb crush and feels bad about it bc he's already bonded, while Steve is just wondering why he feels fond of the weirdo from school idk, idk, haven't thought of how they would find out, tbh

Also, in this scenario I was picturing like, Eddie recently moved in with Wayne and he's like, 12, Steve is 10.

The Harringtons also offered Wayne more money than GOD to taki Eddie somewhere else and break the bond as soon as possible. Wayne didn't take the money, of course.

I also HC that they were happily bonded for like, a week before the parental intervention, lmao

Ooooh alright yeah that’s sad as fuck, I love it! Traumatic childhood bond that’s forced apart and devastates them both, but they can’t even recall entirely what happened. Maybe they start hanging around later in high school or they’re paired up for a project and Eddie ends up at Steve’s house and his parents flip their shit beaches they think they know the truth?

#slick Sunday #steddie #steddie omegaverse #omega steve harrington #alpha eddie munson #omegaverse #a/b/o #steddie ficlet #my asks

[thedvilsinthedetails]

rosekiller microfic

Possibly NSFW but not explicit

toxic exes rosekiller

Based off ‘I like the way you kiss me’ by Artemas

some kind of house yearly switching au idk it’s a throwaway comment

you really need to listen to the song while you read this

Don’t you wanna make me proud? 

Cuz I’m so proud

Baby I’m so proud of you

I like the way you kiss me

I can tell you miss me

I can tell it hits hits hits hits

Not tryna be romantic

I’ll hit it from the back 

Just so you don’t get attached [kiss kiss kiss]

. . .

Barty had his hands tugging on Evan’s collar now. It wasn’t pretty or soft. And it definitely wasn’t loving. It was violent how he pulled him in. Violent how Evan forced his tongue into Barty’s mouth, how he rolled his hips and pulled on his hair. It was a fucking fight. And it was brutal as much as it was beautiful.

And honestly this was a bad idea but those were always Barty’s favourites anyway. Pus the music was so loud it couldn’t be his fault he’d edged to the quieter corners to down his drink. And the lights were that shadowy blue that makes Evan glow like some fallen angel it would be impossible for any person to resist when Evan had looked up and locked eyes with him. And Barty forgets all about how they’d tried this before and it never worked.

How Evan wasn’t an angel at all. How Barty was definitely bad for him. They were bad for each other. It didn’t matter though, not right now.

All he could think about was how he needed this. Needed Evan. Right now. It wasn’t rational.

Friends had tried to stop it, interfere. The issue was Barty didn’t feel bad about anything that was happening right now. Evan moaned into his mouth and Barty just gasped at it. At how it all felt so right. 

And Evan was pulling Barty out of the common room now, tugging his arm to the dorm they used to share before the houses changed. And Barty just followed in this wonderful dreamlike state. Evan. EvanEvanEvan. 

And he could tell from the way Evan had kissed him with that hungry desperation.

And he could tell from the way he could barely wait to rip Barty’s shirt off and shove him down onto the bed.

He felt the same.

Barty pressed his leg right between Evan’s. Relishing the groan it earned him. Evan trailed his mouth to Barty’s neck. Alternating between bruising kisses and bites.

Barty tossed his head to the side to give him more space. God he was relishing the idea of Evan’s marks all over him. 

“Evan.”

He whispered with a wide grin. Evan grunted against his skin in response.

“I heard you got a boyfriend no? Why are you here with me huh? Stai facendo qualcosa di cattivo con me?”

“No boyfriend.”

Evan replied.

“Dumped him a week ago, wasn’t good enough for me. Boring as fuck.”

“I’m better than him yeah?”

“Shut the fuck up. More Italian.”

Evan trailed his tongue down Barty’s neck to his collarbone. 

“Thought you wanted me to shut up mio bambolo.”

Evan shuddered at that.

Admit it, you miss me.”

“Already told you to shut up didn’t I?”

“I’m proud of you baby. Know your worth.”

“If I knew my worth I wouldn’t be making out with you right now.”

“Then don’t.”

Barty smirked.

Evan didn’t reply, just took hold of Barty and turned him over. They both knew what that had really meant.

…

“Fuck baby.”

Evan gasped, sweat slicked and panting as he collapsed next to Barty onto the bed. Barty just grinned his shitty little grin.

••• translations:

“stai facendo qualcosa di cattivo con me?” - Are you doing something naughty with me

“mio bambolo” - my doll

#Rosekiller #evan x barty #barty x evan #barty crouch jr #barty crouch junior #slytherin skittles #evan rosier #rosekiller fanfiction #marauders fandom #harry potter marauders #marauders era #rosekiller brainrot #rosekiller microfic #dead gay wizards #marauders #barty being barty #barty jr #barty crouch jr x evan rosier #evan being evan #evan rosier x barty crouch jr

[jerreeeeeee]

i don't think taako's voice is really all that high most of the time. it's higher than justin's normal voice a little, but idk, the defining quality of it isn't its pitch to me, there's something else that i don't really have the words for. but anyway i do notice that his voice gets lower and less exaggerated when he's being serious. which is interesting bc it sort of implies that the usual "taako voice" is something he puts on.

i don't really think of taako as a habitual performer. his charisma modifier is a -1, he's not this ultra smooth charming actor, and although he does tend to hide behind humor and is slow to build connections, he's also very frank with what he's about and what he wants. he goes on an entire tirade about wanting to talk about his feelings (he's multidimensional!), he never acts embarrassed or hesitant about big moments of vulnerability and caring for others (arms outstretched, "i'm not going fucking anywhere," admitting a deep fear to kravitz on their first date, spilling his tragic backstory to angus, not to mention several serious moments with lup) (and not all of these can be chalked up to "forgotten connections," either. he does have a foundation of growth with magnus and merle, even forgotten, and his conversations with lup are of course all with memories intact, but he does not have that with kravitz and angus). he's just slow to reveal all of his hidden depths, because of (understandable) trust issues. but all in all he's not nearly as closed off as i think fandom tends to portray him (which is not to say he's open, either), nor is he someone who wears a lot of masks and obscures himself. i don't think he hides his "true self."

sizzle it up was successful because of his intelligence, not his charisma. he's a natural teacher who's knowledgeable and passionate, and that was what made the show great, not his personality or performance (though i don't think those were bad. just not the primary appeal of the show. the only fan we see is ren, and she loved sizzle it up because it inspired her and taught her to cook, not because she thought taako was awesome or whatever). bc that's the thing, he's not a performer, but he is extremely adaptable. so when he's set up with a stagecoach and a show lined up, sure, he'll have a TV persona, he'll learn to be charming, he'll learn to be showy, when he's on stage. when he gets famous, he learns to like being famous, but i don't think it was really a dream of his before then. or at least not in the way people think of it. i don't think he ever wanted to be a celebrity as much as a celebrity chef or celebrity wizard. he doesn't care if people think he's pretty. he doesn't want people to adore him (before the voidfish, anyway. afterwards is a different story. there's a void where love used to be that he's desperate to fill, and adoration almost feels like it works). really what he wants is for people to appreciate his skill and intelligence and depth (and he's also very afraid of actually displaying those things. he's multidimensional).

but most of the time, when he's not literally performing for an audience, i just don't think he's putting on a show, desperate for people to like him and think he's charming. he'll do what he needs to do, say what he needs to say, be who he needs to be in any given circumstance, with strangers and antagonists, but he also drops the act when it's not necessary. or at least his performance is subtler. he performs stupidity, he performs nonchalance, he makes efforts to be funny (because he is always funny, but that's something you have to work for and always be thinking about, even when the humor is dry), he carefully does just enough to be useful, but not enough to raise expectations. he's very aware of how other people view him, but he's also perfectly okay with people thinking negatively about him—as long as they're the negative traits he wants people to see. but, he only does all those things in the beginning of the show; after a little while with magnus and merle, after a little while with the bob, he drops the act. so i guess that's the difference to me. he's adaptable out of necessity, it doesn't bleed into his entire life. i don't even really think i'd qualify it as a performance. it's more of an invisibility. he's not performing charisma to get people to like him, he's trying to lay low. but then when he actually wants people to like him, he's himself, fairly unapologetically. with the people who matter, lup, magnus and merle, kravitz, the other bob members, the other ipre crew, he's pretty comfortable with himself.

one last interesting point is that while he doesn’t seem to hesitate when it comes to actions, he does shy away from verbal displays of affection, trust, vulnerability. and the best two scenes to show that play out almost exactly the same: lup’s best day ever dinner, and dropping his disguise self with kravitz. in each, taako does something meaningful for both npcs, who then verbalize their affection for him, which taako immediately deflects with a joke.

taako drops his disguise spell for kravitz, totally honest with him, (although… i don’t tend to think the beauty sacrifice was as meaningful to taako as fandom tends to portray, i think most of his vanity is an exaggeration he intentionally cultivates, but still, it’s a vulnerable moment, he clearly cares what kravitz thinks), and kravitz tells him he loves him. to which taako replies with a joke. he does not return the words.

taako doesn’t hesitate to construct the best day ever for lup, never even questions why she’d ask. he puts it all together, cooks for her, shows her he knows her, he loves her—and then when she bears her heart to him, tells him he is her heart, all he says is, “i know,” and pulls out a bottle of vodka. of course lup knows he loves her, the whole day was an elaborate demonstration of it, but he doesn’t say anything. to be fair, it’s not exactly a typical interaction between them, taako is textually scared shitless, lup did just tell him she’s going to turn herself into an undead abomination, so he’s not exactly at his best here. but anyway.

i don’t really have anything to add to this observation, it’s just very consistent and interesting to me. taako is fairly comfortable with grand gestures, but sidesteps around words. which ties in perfectly with his identity as a chef, to me. cooking is an action, work, intention, cooking for people is an act of love, an act of connection, an act of caring, and taako’s character doesn’t fit the bill for that—except, he kinda really does.

#listened to the multidimensional scene bc i'm writing about mongooses. it made me think #also i'm learning so much about mongooses and also weather systems in south asia. not strictly necessary but interesting #mine #taako #taz taako #taz balance #the adventure zone #analysis #also his cha mod is -1 in gerblins its possible he put ASIs into it later on but it still wouldnt be very high #his int and dex are his high scores

[imlivinginyourtrashcan]

Hi hello and howdy

Since I can't contain my thoughts here's all the "Mirage" logicistics. Basically they either swap or enhance ones personality, heres a few examples:

Mirage Lenore is way more looney and impulsive, with a practically nonexistant off switch having to be dragged off screaming before she sets anything on fire, her group mainly sticks with her for fear of their own lives and she and Annabel are ALLOWED TO BE GAY!!! HOORAY!!! They still have the pretend to hate each other thing but thats mainly due to Annabel's paranoia

Mirage Duke is a shit magician who constantly looses parts of his tricks, he's also like WAYYY too overdramatic, the kinda mf to fall over if you steal his chip,

"MY CHIP!!"

"Its... its just a crisp.."

"I WAS GOING TO EAT THAT!"

"Oh my god..."

So yeah, pathetic cringefail looser LMFAO, but he is the kinda person to pull a "OMG MY BEST FRIEND! MOVE!" And shove whoever out of his way

Mirage Pluto is if you took a wet cat and made him a golden retriever. He's very hyperactive, social, easily distracted. Mf is like "wanna hear abt my hyperfixations?!" Talks and doesn't wait for an answer a neat thing i did with some characters Mirage's is i inverted stuff abt them like hair, emblems, all that. He still thinks M! Duke's magic is cool

Mirage Berenice is a feral little creature, constantly biting or nibbling on things (mainly Eulalies arm, or her own. I dont think chewlery exists in the victorian era). She's also the queen of being unhinged, in spectre form shes somewhat normal at least. For the most part she's in her own world

Mirage Eulalie is the mean autistic, less into creepy/old things n thinks their lame and/or weird. She's the one dragging Berenice around and keeping the gang from falling apart. Her and M! Morella really out here sharing the only group braincell, shes also blunt as fuck and wont hesitate to tell you you look bad. I wanted to lean more into the japanese part of her character so she just kinda- speaks more of it now (lol idk how else to explain it)

Mirage Morella, like M! Eulalie, is a mean autistic. She's less emotional, and more of "I dont give a damn just get me out of here.", sticks with whatever group she's feelin that day tbh. Won't tell you you look bad, will probably just call you a dumbass and leave

Mirage Annabel is kinda like regular Annabel but without the "Life is like chess" mentality. So more jumpy, kinda a walking talking mental breakdown waiting to happen. Excess paranoia and increase of hallucinations cus pookie and I decided we aren't giving her a break

Mirage Prospero is no longer fancy and polite, he is sopping wet germaphobic wet cat. He will go through great lengths to avoid disease, faints around blood and puke, screams at the sight of his own rats (or just rats/bugs in general), actively raising his and Annabel's blood pressure with how scardy he is.

Mirage Montresor is imo the funniest one cuz he's just a polite little gentleman, doin all the chivalry shit like opening doors, pushing chairs in and out, saying his pleases/thank yous/welcomes, he's even calling everyone "Sir" and "Ma'am". He's still an asshole, but you really gotta provoke him to see that

Tbh, I didn't think much abt Mirage Will since Will to me is kinda just there as Monty's lackey who gets kicked around. SO he's less of a pushover, more demanding, up and refuses what people tell him, bullies M! Monty, he tried bullying M! Ada and M! Morella but bro got his ass kicked. On top of it, he's unfortunately more sexist and stubborn. No more people pleasing ig 🤷‍♀️

Finally, Mirage Ada. What I wanted to do for her is have her be an absolute girlboss who is always serving 100% of the time. Everything she does is her choice and for her and her friends, and and and shes Aroace too, pretty chill when she has to reject someone just like:

"Hey i like u"

"Oh! I don't feel the same but we can still be friends?"

"Ok"

EPIC HIGH FIVE

She also beat M! Will up, good for her

So uh, yeah! Thats all i got. If you have questions, feel free to comment or ask in the askbox. :)

#nevermore webcomic #annabel lee webtoon #nevermore webtoon #lenore nevermore #lenore vandernacht #annabel lee whitlock #annabel lee nevermore #duke nevermore #pluto nevermore #eulalie nevermore #berenice nevermore #prospero nevermore #will nevermore #morella nevermore #nevermore fanfic

[againstme]

hello my fellow autistics. i’m asking you a question and giving you two options only sorry but i’m curious if this is just a me experience or just not liking my ex lmao:

i personally thought i would be all about smooching and making out but like. lips are slimy. and i never know what i’m doing sowwwy. 🫣 also my ex used to bite my lips, very hard. what the fuck was up with that

#if you vote pls reblog i wanna seeeee #smooching you on the mouth? having another person’s tongue in my mouth? #hickeys though? great 1000000%. really love giving really love receiving. #this could also be due to just not being used to doing it. but who knows tbh. #iiiiiii don’t fucking know man. i feel like unless i REALLY like you idk if i’d like it #autism #neurodivergent #blah blah yeah u get it #is this embarrassing to post? maybe. #i swear i’m not a BAD kisser it just wasn’t what it was hyped up to be for me #idk.

[lottieurl]

#the other polls annoys me so much #the tags are extremely depressing #people being like oh ive only read 8 :( ive only read 19 :(( #and listing what i can only call excuses?? #insane #if you've read one singular book this year and loved it thats fucking great love it for you tell me abt it #as someone who personally does love those kinds of statistics #and loves to check on my storygraph and loves the numbers and sets up goals #this attitude in that post is just bleak imo #plus i hate how the first option is 0-9 #like girl there is a huge difference between not reading and reading roughly 3 books a month?? #especially when the books might be shit the length of dostoyevsky lol #idk i keep seeing that poll and it seems to make everyone who havent read 25 books since january feel bad #so #lets focus on how many you really enjoyed

[skitskatdacat63]

I would commit murder to see the interview these pictures are from

#im feeling very monza 2011 today i guess!!! #nah but seriously PLEASE I WANT TO WATCH THIS SO BAD #I NEED CONTEXT FOR THEIR INCREDIBLY AWKWARD HUG #let me describe these photos for you bcs they are all just peak vettonso: #the first one where theyre smiling and looking at each other 🥰🥰🥰 #and the second where theyre both smiling at the interviewer(?) #third and fourth i describe as: twink about to pounce #like seriously seb what is he talking about that is making you look at him like you want to eat him #fifth is sending me like ITS SO AWKWARD AND I LOVE IT #just my fav thing about 2010s vettonso where seb is so excitable and touchy and etc #and nando is like: i dont want to be here rn get him off me DJKFLGL #stop it Fernando. i know you want to. #and then last one idk i really like it. you guys know how i feel abour chairs. #i guess to me theres something about how differently they're sitting #like seb is more open and relaxed and Fernando is a lot more curled up and small #ANYWAYS WHERE IS THE VIDEO OF THIS 😭😭😭😭 I NEED IT #this actually adds to my bafflement abt their dynamic at this gp #bcs this is how the race wknd starts off and isnt it truly wonderful? that fernando then says 3 days later: fuck u my boy #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #vettonso #2011 italian gp #we do a little bit of f1

[resident-gay-bitch]

little rich boy sirius who gets disowned and can barely survive without his expensive brands and the basic human need to eat at least once a day meeting the entirely too generous james potter who just falls for the vanity and sincerity of the reformed rich boy and decides that once sirius stops caring about brands and status and rich boy things and just cares about what matters in life he decides to spoil his boyfriend to pieces because he’s secretly sitting on a fucking fortune

#idk i just think it’s funny #like james would find sirius when he’s struggling with money because he’s so bad at saving and prioritising his spendings because he’s never #had too before and so james would teach him how to do all that stuff and emotionally support sirius through it all and sirius just falls in #love with this beautiful guy who’s just so generous and who teaches him so many things and finds value in kindness and sincerity and #compassion and all that jazz and james falls in love with sirius helplessly because he might be stuck up and vein and kind of selfish and #is stuck up and cares all too much about status but he’s trying so hard to be better and he finds empathy because sirius got kicked out for #the worst reasons because he’s always been the black sheep of his highly cultist christian family or whatver and he’s also outwardly queer #and james decides that he wants to give sirius everything and loves the way he looks in expensive makeup and designer faux fur coats and #heels and divine jewellery and all that jazz but makes sirius sell it all and learn what it means to be human and not rely on money and #status and brands and stuff and sirius learns what it’s like to be decent and in touch with humanity and only then does james take sirius on #a surprise luxury holiday for his birthday or something and then just buys him thousands of dollars worth of all these glamorous looking #things and sirius is like omg what the fuck jamie and then he just becomes sirius’ sugar daddy because he can’t help himself but they’re #also in love and much better people because of it and when sirius buys things now it’s not because of brands or because they have big price #tags like he used too. he now buys things with james’ credit card he keeps in his own wallet because he thinks he’ll feel pretty in them or #because he thinks james will loose it if he sees sirius walking around in it or if he sees a really cute toaster that sends him into a #frenzy that has him spending all way too much on an impromptu kitchen renovation but james doesn’t care because as long as his boyfriend is #happy and actually paying attention to the price of things and calculating the best value and taking james’ opinion as well and just being #happy and safe and accepted in his new home and family here with his jamie #please i think they’d be so cute ugh!!! #prongsfoot #bambibelle #drabble #fic idea #marauders #james potter #sirius black #jay talks

[bandtrees]

reblog to gently feed him a cheese puff out of the palm of your hand

#scribbles #bungou stray dogs #bsd #goncharov bsd #ivan goncharov bsd #ivan bsd #ivan goncharov #blood #head trauma #gore #hes my fav minor character of choice #i love characters who have fucked up brains. the dominus fan says #i have a highly specific vision of after the cannibalism arc goncharov is taken to some government ability hospital-prison #because i think something a lot of ppl miss with him - or rather what compels me to him - is his mental vulnerability and lack of autonomy #whatever fyodor did to his brain? FUCKED UP!! i honestly just feel Bad for goncharov more than anything else #im rly not a fan of the whole shippingbrained take that hes just another like. villain yaoi guy you can ship with fyodor #when his circumstances of like. all things considered being completely unable to think properly much less consent #make him waay more dubious to ship with than like. idk shibusawa or whoever #i love goncharov tho hes really intriguing. ik he just kinda exists for shock value and a fight scene and making fyodor scarier #BUT i like him:] and people have been obsessed with characters for less so i get him #he gets a pov scene in a fic im writing with my friend dark and im excited to get to share that

[moongothic]

Do wanna say, I am actually really curious how Iva-chan would feel if the Dragodile Divorce went REAL BAD

'Cause they didn't know the two were in a relationship at all, right. (Otherwise, like, if Iva-chan knows about Crocodile having a kid then surely they'd realize that would've also been Dragon's kid and like. Understands that's Luffy etc) So as far as Iva-chan understands the situation, Crocodile may have been secretly slightly involved with the Revolutionaries for a period of time, had a kid out of the blue, transitioned, and either immidiately broke ties with the Revs entirely and fucked off to Alabasta, or kept on assisting the Revs in secret (possibly monetarily, being a sugar daddy and all 💰🐊💰) for however long in secret, only to pretty much betray them out of nowhere by attempting to take over Alabasta 17 years later Either way, surely Ivankov would've been deeply confused by this turn of events, right? Like what happened to him, why would Crocodile do any of this?

But if the straw that broke the camel's back and shattered Crocodile's psyche was the Dragodile Divorce going really bad, either from Dragon not being that accepting OR due to things going violent over a miscommunication... How would Ivankov feel about that?

Keep in mind, we've only ever heard Iva-chan talk about Dragon with nothing but adoration and respect. They sincerely hold Dragon in such high regard, can you imagine how badly either revelation could change how Iva-chan's views Dragon? 'Cause like, sure if Dragon's straight then that's one thing, but lashing out at his loved one? When he came out? At what might've been the most emotionally vunerable time of Crocodile's life (between the transing and the baby and having to leave his son forever. Y'know. Heavy shit)? Yeah, frankly speaking, Iva-chan would be completely justified in slapping the shit out of Dragon and giving him some choise words. Perhaps even some 💉 Karmic Punishment 💉 to teach a lesson Feeling disappointed in Dragon would be an understatement. But even if The Divorce happened due to a tragic accident (of Dragon attacking the strange man he has never seen before out of instinct when going to see his wife and child), it's been nearly two whole decades. Have the two even spoken since then? Like presumably not considdering Crocodile didn't even know who Luffy was. So if they haven't spoken at all-- did Dragon ever apologize? Or was he that much of a coward he couldn't face Croc and take responsibility for what he did? If so, that is absolutely pathetic and frankly irresponsible considdering the feelings he would've left Crocodile festering with.

Like either way, I'm deeply facinated how Iva-chan would take the news. How that could impact their relationship with Dragon, as well as how they've viewed Crocoboy for the past few years as well.

Because suddenly Crocoboy didn't just go bonkers out of nowhere, abandon and betray the Revolutionaries to try to do something monstrous for selfish gain. Suddenly, it was Dragon who abandoned Crocodile and left him all alone for nearly two decades, believing obtaining an Ancient Weapon was the only way to take down the World Government. Countless innocent lives that perhaps could've been spared in Alabasta had Dragon just fucking talked to his ex--

Yeah. I'm curious how Iva-chan would feel

#Moon posting #OP Meta #Sorry my brain is soup I can't form a coherent thought rn #Something about the mental image of Iva-chan getting fucking furious at Dragon on Crocodile's behalf #Just #I'm not crying shut up #Like if there is a scenario where Dragon genuinely needs to apologize to Crocodile for however the hell he fucked up #I think Iva-chan taking Crocodile's side and telling Dragon that he fucked up and needs to take responsibility would be like. Important #'Cause I think Iva-chan might be the only person in the world who could get Dragon to apologize (considdering how long they've been friends #Especially because Iva-chan might be the person who genuinely understands Crocodile's feelings the best #(Depending on how his egg got cracked and whether or not Iva-chan needed to help with that etc etc) #All of this to say; the Dragodile Divorce really would be more interesting if it went Real Bad. It would impact so many more characters #Another familiar question: What would Kuma have thought of it? How about Sabo and Koala? #But yes Iva-chan's reaction is the one I'd be the most interested in. Especially considdering like. IDK I kind of thought they'd have... #...a bigger role in Kuma's backstory but they actually kind of didn't. Like their friendship was not that important in the end #And a part of me deeply feels like Iva-chan should have a bigger role somehow in the story. Like they should impact things more #And yes if Crocodad Real then that alone would add to Iva-chan's role a whole bunch. But that would be like in past tense. #How about how things are going to go down from here on out? Yeah

[fleshdyke]

#csa warning for tags #ughhh ik i was just talking abt this but man. Man. constantly bullied as a child + raped as a child is a brutal combo huh #completely irreversibly fucked up sense of intimacy. i dont want to have sex with anyone i dont care what ppl think of me looks wise but i #also care more than anything and want people to want me so bad #like when ur only experience with anyone at all finding you desirable is being raped at 6ish. fucks u up man #was constantly told by everyone i knew that i was undesirable from day fucking one. i was always the one ppl would dare their friends to #'ask out' bc everyone thought i was that bad. i never had those rumours of 'some boy likes you' without people laughing in the background #all of my friends. even the ones that were also weird kids and bullied etc etc always have stories of other kids having crushes on them or #whatever. and i just never had that. it feels like i missed out on something important #i want to be pursued by a guy i hate i want them to not leave me alone. i want to feel like im in danger. and i know how fucking disgusting #that is but i cant help it. like i feel like thats the only way im going to feel normal and wanted like theres not something inherently #wrong with me. and i know how dangerous that is but its not like it matters anyways bc still no one likes me at all. #and i know how stupid of a thing it is to obsess over like what am i 9 years old? but i just cant get it out of my head #like idk i feel like the only way im going to actually feel desirable at all is if someone tries to rape me again. or if i feel like i have #to worry about someone raping me again. i know i wouldnt feel that way if someone was like. nice about it. #bc if someone genuinely liked me and was a decent human being about it i wouldnt be able to see it as anything other than faking it for pit #i wouldnt be able to believe it. even if i wasnt waiting for them to drop the joke and start laughing at me i would always think it was jus #an act bc they feel bad for me. the only way i could ever think it's genuine and that i'm desirable at all is if someone sexually #harassed me. like idk how to explain it but thats the only way i could feel desirable at all #bc it's the only way i've ever been desirable. when i was a kid. #and it terrifies me so bad bc i know how fucking disgusting that is and how self destructive it is #but i still feel like i dont even have to really worry about being assaulted. bc i still believe im completely undesirable at my core. #i dont believe i could be desired so i dont believe i have to worry about being raped. bc no one would want to anyways #rambles #vent

[puppyeared]

#UAUHGG im havung oc thoughts. plaguing myBRAIN. i can feel my heartrate spiking holy shit #ok so. i rly wanna touch up presto and shuffles story without scaring myself out of it by overthinking it. esp the implications of #them having animal features and what they would eat. as well as worldbuilding character dynamics setting background characters ugghh. #constantly have to tell myself its just for fun. basically theyre rival magicians who keep their identities secret and fuck it up in #the funniest way possible LMAO. they rent the same apartment and the landlady accidentally gives it to both of them without them knowing #so they end up walking in on each other out of costume and have this weird tension around not revealing each others identities despite thei #borderline malicious rivalry. blackmail may or may not be involved i havent decided yet #they DO consider backing out of tenancy but they decide not to so they can make sure they dont reveal each others identities #thats the idea but its really abstract bc i dont have a direction or writing in mind. they just rattle in my head like spare change #other stuff i have rn is. they both consider each other a copycat and they have the same skill level of magic #but they have different styles and techniques theyre just too focused on outperforming each other to notice #presto likes to make people laugh so they probably include gags and impossible feats. shuffle is more elegant and focuses on #smooth movements and dangerous stunts. i want to make that reflect in their costumes but its hard bc stage magician costumes tend to stick #to suits and capes.. so idk. then maybe side characters like the landlady and other tenants but i havent given em much thought orz #i really should practice with concepts because i have a bad habit of making everything similar to the first try so its frustrating #and i suck at writing characters. but im doing this for fun so im trying not to get hung up on whether its generic or not #yapping #stares at the floor. maybe i should make a carrd for my ocs #oc talk #presto #shuffle

[crabs-brencil]

yk i probably should have gotten my stomach pumped a few(?) hours ago but i passed out instead and now im making myself chicken nuggets and if that's not a sign that god is playing me like a kazoo then idk what is

#ugh im like #most of the way through ...processing?? the contents of my od and so it def wouldn't do shit to either admit myself or try to diy it right? #idk #anyways the point is that im still nauseous but im also really hungry so that's also making me nauseous? idk this sucks #wow what a revelation overdosing sucks?? who would've guessed #god i feel like a fucking idiot lmao #idk i just need to bitch to ppl that don't know me irk #*irl #anyways my nuggets are done sooo #delete later #it wasn't even that bad of an overdose (fucking obv lmao since im writing this) #crazy that you can just. wake up from one tho that's actually insane #did not fucking expect that #ew