#idk why I didn't post this here when we finished this but lol here it is now

[littlejuicebox]

The other kind of kink.

Written as a giveaway prize for @chaoticgoodstuff! Hope you enjoy the final version posted here! <3

Pairing: Spawn Astarion x Female Tav

Summary: Astarion didn't quite know how to form a relationship with Tav after she rejected him at the tiefling party. But he begins to realize that perhaps he has other expertise that may be of use to the woman. Namely, curly hair care.

Word Count: 4K

Tags/Warnings: fluff, sweet astarion, brief mentions of astarion's trauma/past, lightly ooc astarion, idk what else it's mostly fluff tbh lol

-----

“So which path do you think we should take, soldier? Underdark or Mountain Pass? Either way, I’m ready to slash some baddies!” Karlach says, swinging her ax for show as the two warrior women chat while Gale finishes cooking dinner. 

It would be at least another hour and the women were starving.

“Hmm…” Tav murmurs, looking up at her tiefling friend from where she had been sharpening her great sword. It certainly needed a bit of attention, after slashing through so many goblins a few days ago, “I haven’t decided yet, any suggestions?” 

Karlach shrugs and shakes her head before turning to look at Astarion, where he is perched on a log, filing his nails, not more than a few feet away, “Oi! What do you reckon, Fangs? Underdark or Mountain Pass?”

The silver-haired elf glances up from his task momentarily, assessing Tav and Karlach, scarlet eyes narrowed in thought, “Both sound equally atrocious. But if the great Archdruid Halsin said the Underdark is the safer route – which I find impossible to believe – then, I suppose that is my vote. Work smarter, not harder and all that.”

Tav nods, considering the rogue’s suggestion, and with a final rub of whetstone on metal, sheaths her great sword as she says, “Astarion’s right. Underdark, it is.”

“Well of course I’m right, darling! Aren’t I always?” Astarion responds with a pleased little chuckle as he tucks away his nail file. 

Inside, his confidence glows at the small bit of validation from their camp leader. He’d felt as if her view of him may have changed after the very awkward encounter they’d had at the tiefling party a few days ago, when he’d drunkenly propositioned her and she’d adamantly refused. He’d thought their relationship – could he call it friendship? – all but ruined after that blunder. Apparently he’d somehow misread the signs, and she wasn’t looking for sex like every other individual he’d ever known. 

Astarion had considered their prior interactions dancing on the border of flirtatious, but Tav indicated she preferred to focus on their cause, not on intermingling with her campmates. He thought Tav a bit odd after that interaction, and admittedly felt a bit insulted in the moment. He was gorgeous, why wouldn’t she jump at the opportunity he dangled in front of her? 

But, in the soberness of the following morning, Astarion decided he could work within her parameters; he’d just have to find another way to secure her favoritism. In fact, in some ways he was thankful she rejected him. 

“Yeah, yeah, you’re a genius,” Tav responds with a laugh, rolling her eyes at the rogue as she stands and stretches, “Well, I’m off to clean up before dinner, if either of you care to join?”

Karlach waves her hand dismissively, “Nah! I’ll do that after dinner. But can I borrow your whetstone for my ax?”

Tav nods at the tiefling, watching as Karlach grabs the stone and walks off toward her tent, ax in hand, before turning to address her other campmate, “And what about you, Astarion?”

The silver-haired elf shrugs and nods; at this point he’s taking any opportunity he can to spend time with Tav. The more he’s with her and gets to know her, the closer she will get to him, and the more secure he will feel. 

Or at least, that’s his only Plan B. Since Plan A went up in flames. 

He crouches to gather his bathing supplies from his pack before coming closer to the warrior woman currently waiting for him, “I suppose I could do with a bit of a bath. It isn’t hair wash day, but–” 

“It isn’t hair wash day?” Tav interjects, her eyebrows furrowing at the vampire, “You don’t wash your hair every day? Isn’t that… gross?”

The rogue pauses and blinks at the woman, tilting his head just a fraction as he assesses her, “Darling, please tell me you are not washing your hair every day. I understand on the days we are soaked in blood and guts it is a necessity… but, certainly you haven’t washed your hair every single day for the past three days when we have done nothing apart from lounge in camp and prepare to move onto the next part of our journey… right?” 

Tav cocks her head to the side, mirroring Astarion’s bewildered expression as she asks, “Should I… not be?”

That explains quite a bit, Astarion thinks, as his eyes roam over the unruly curls springing from the crown of Tav’s head. He’d thought it was perhaps an odd stylistic choice, or she simply did not care about the state of her hair, but maybe it was merely ignorance. Perhaps no one ever showed her how to care for the red, curly locks cascading like a lion’s mane around her face.

A small wave of sympathy crosses Astarion’s heart; he internally smashes it down before the wave grows into a tsunami. Best to not care too much about this woman, she could turn into a mindflayer at any moment, after all. And then he’d have to slice her to ribbons, as previously agreed upon.

“Ah.. well, darling. It isn’t wrong, exactly,” He starts, his eyes shifting away from Tav’s face as he tries to delicately address the matter, “It’s just… with a hair texture like yours, you aren’t doing yourself any favors.”

Tav simply blinks in response, her expression vacant; she is not understanding Astarion’s meaning.

The rogue sighs and shakes his head slightly. Well, he at least tried to be delicate, but that did not seem to sink in. More direct, it is. 

A vague gesture to his friend’s red curls and then Astarion explains, “Your hair is dry, Tav. That is why it is difficult to maintain and why you’ve broken more than one comb trying to drag it through that unruly mane.”

A flicker of embarrassment crosses Tav’s face and the rogue groans. He doesn’t know how to navigate feelings and friendships; his relationships with his siblings had been much less work… not that he particularly enjoyed those relationships or cared if the other spawn liked him. But he wanted Tav to like him, if only for his own motives, of course. 

“It’s really… not all that bad, darling. But perhaps I could help you, give you a few pointers? I think your hair could be quite gorgeous – your best feature, even, given the proper care. It’s rare to see a natural redhead like you, it already captures a lot of attention… let’s make it something awe-inspiring.” Astarion says, gently, his hand coming out to tug at one frizzy curl as he tries to smooth over the insult he just threw at his campmate. 

But, hells, someone had to tell her eventually. Even his siblings wouldn’t let him walk around with such unruly locks. 

“O-oh, sure, okay,” Tav agrees, still trying to overcome the embarrassment as her own hand comes to rake through her hair and gets caught in a nest of tangles, instead. She grimaces; Astarion had a point, it seemed, “Do I need to bring anything special?”

“Let me go back to my tent and grab my hair washing supplies, I’ll meet you down by the river in a bit, hm?” Astarion responds with a small smile before turning back toward his tent and disappearing within the shelter to rummage through his vast collection of shampoos, oils, perfumes, and soaps.

Tav merely hums in agreement and then heads in the opposite direction, toward the camp-designated bathing spot, towel in hand. As she’s walking, she pulls a curl in front of her eyes and examines it with a new perspective. Gods, it really was dry.

*

When Astarion makes his way to the river, he finds Tav waist-deep in the rushing water, still in her smallclothes and soaping her arms. Her back is turned to him, and the sun is catching her hair in a flattering light. Autumnal colors of red, orange, burgundy, and wine dance around her crown in the form of spiraled locks, and the elf cannot help but admire the natural beauty bestowed upon the woman.

Her hair was a gorgeous tone, reminiscent of the warmth of a fire or a deep, satisfying vintage wine. But it wasn’t just Tav’s hair that was attractive… she really was quite striking. With the woman unaware of his presence, Astarion took a quick moment to admire the rippling muscles in her back and the strong, lithe arms she used to carry her greatsword.

No one with working eyes — or eye, perhaps, —  could deny that Tav was attractive. After all, there was a reason Astarion had chosen to proposition her over the others in the first place. 

But, sex or not, the woman certainly seemed to favor him, which meant more than once since their journey began, she’d sliced clean through an enemy at his back, and fed him servings of her own blood. 

So now, it was his turn to repay her somehow, some way. And if Tav didn’t accept his physical talents, well, then at least she would accept this. 

“Hello, darling,” Astarion calls, causing the woman to turn and acknowledge him with a small smile and wave. He quickly places his bathing kit on the river bank and undresses to just his briefs before tentatively placing a foot in the water. It was warm enough to be tolerable, so the rogue shrugged and grabbed his wooden comb and conditioner before sinking into the water and wading toward his campmate. 

“Alright, now, get down into the water,” The elf directs as he shakes the small bottle of conditioner in his hands, prepping the contents.

“But I thought you said I’m not supposed to wash my hair every–” Tav begins, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as she eyes the bottle, before the displeased glare from Astarion causes the question to die on her lips. 

“Do you want my help, or do you want to continue to look like a sheep desperately in need of shearing, darling?” Astarion asks with a soft sigh as he pops the top of the bottle open and gives it a whiff, “Just bend down and trust me. Oh and here, hold these for a moment.”

Tav grabs the comb and bottle she’s offered and then does what she’s asked. When she’s shoulder-deep in the water, she feels Astarion’s hand guiding her to tip her head back. She follows the directive and is soon greeted by the vision of Astarion’s face hovering above hers, scarlet eyes intensely concentrated as he drags his hand through her curls.

“Your hair texture is a bit different from mine…” He muses idly, as he works to fully saturate the thick locks of hair on his companion’s head with water, “But this conditioner should work, for now. We’ll have to find something better suited to you, when the opportunity allows.” 

Astarion takes the comb from Tav’s hand without a word and uses the tool and his own fingers to work out some of the ever-present knots in the woman’s hair. She watches him for a moment before closing her eyes and simply allowing Astarion to work at the task. Before long, the elf is gently guiding her head back up, into a straight position, and trading the comb for the bottle.

“Close your eyes,” He directs, and Tav obliges again as the vampire places a generous amount of rosemary-scented conditioner in his hand. Then he gives the bottle back to Tav, rubs his hands together, and begins to work the creamy liquid through her hair, starting at the ends and slowly wandering up toward her scalp. About midway through he’s reaching for the bottle again, “Who knew your hair was this thick? You’re about to use up all of my favorite conditioner, darling.” 

Tav frowns slightly at this comment, trying to turn and face Astarion before he quickly redirects her head with a soft click of his tongue, “I’m sorry… I can buy you more when we run into our next merchant.”

“Oh, it’s no matter. I stole this bottle anyway– I’m sure I can steal another along the way,” Astarion says with a slight dismissive flip of his hand, “Besides, I think you need it far more than I do, right now.” 

His fingers trail up to the crown of her head as he speaks, and Tav’s eyes flutter closed once again as Astarion begins to massage the product into her roots. He moves in sections, parting her hair every few inches and attentively working the conditioner into her scalp. The sensation was quite enjoyable; if the water were a bit warmer, Tav might have fallen asleep under Astarion’s gentle, methodical touch. 

Far too quickly for her liking, Astarion completes the task and gently pats her shoulder to signal he’s done for now. He grabs his comb and what little remains of his favorite hair product from the woman. 

“You need to let that sit for a few minutes, at least, little sheep.” Astarion directs before wading back to the river bank and dropping his supplies with the rest of his things. Tav watches as he grabs his own bar of soap and begins to bathe himself.

“How did you learn about all this?” The woman calls to the rogue as she wades through the water, mostly for something to do as she waits. 

Astarion hums as he considers the question; there is a pause in the conversation as he drops his bar of soap back along the bank and uses his hand to rinse the soapy remnants along his body. Tav cannot help but follow his fingers as they graze along his chest and arms, dispersing droplets of water that drizzle down the lines of his abs and back into the river. 

“I wish I could tell you how I learned, but I can’t recall…” He murmurs, his voice sounding a bit far away as he thinks, “It feels like something ingrained in me like speaking Elvish or the ability to read, for instance; someone must have taught me… I suppose one of my parents, or someone else in my family.”

A small look of sadness flits across Tav’s face but she quickly hides it before her companion notices, knowing that Astarion will balk at anything resembling pity. She often forgets how little memory he has of his past before Cazador, how much he’d endured until now, and how much of himself he’d lost in the process of it all. He was so good at pretending to be normal and happy-go-lucky… but then, they were quite alike in that aspect, weren’t they? It was easier to be the unbothered goofball than to be anything that resembled fragility, wasn’t it? 

Tav chooses to not respond to his answer, knowing nothing she says can truly make his situation better, and instead grabs a conditioner-covered curl, “Can I rinse this now?” 

Astarion nods as he climbs out of the water and begins gathering his own things, “Yes, go rinse it out – make sure there’s none of that left in your hair, and then come find me back at camp for the next part. I’m going back — it’s growing a bit cold.”

“Next part?” Tav responds with a soft whine, watching as Astarion towels himself off, “There’s more?”

“Darling, if you want your hair to look even close to as good as mine, there is a lot of work involved. Now hurry up, so we can be done before Gale is ready to feed you whatever disastrous concoction he’s made tonight,” Astarion says, his tone a bit joking as he begins slipping into a new set of camp clothes.

The woman groans and obeys the rogue’s directions, turning away as Astarion strips off his undergarments to replace them with new ones, and wading once again toward the deeper water. Tav dunks herself down into the river and begins running her fingers through spirals of hair, massaging out any slippery residue she finds along the way. With the amount of hair she had, it took several minutes, and by the time she was finished, Astarion was already gone. The sun was just beginning to kiss the earth in its descent toward night.

Tav quickly toweled herself off and dressed. Then she wrapped her hair up in the towel, twisting it around her locks in a turban-like fashion before collecting her belongings and making the short journey back to camp.

*

“There you are, darling,” Astarion calls as he catches sight of Tav, before patting a stump near his tent, “Come over here so I can finish defining your curls.” 

Tav furrows her eyebrows in confusion, because she has no idea what Astarion means, but she’s learned to simply shut up and go along with whatever he says for this entire endeavor. As she comes closer, she notices the elf has laid out even more supplies for her hair.

Did it really require all of this?

She sighs and takes a seat. Astarion immediately sets to work, placing a dollop of some sort of creamy pomade-like mixture in his hand and working it through her hair again. After that, he begins sectioning her hair into pieces, directing Tav every once and a while to hold this or that piece as he combs through her locks. 

“Ouch–” Tav hisses as the elf seems to be pulling at the base of her scalp. She moves to jerk away and Astarion huffs impatiently behind her, one of his hands coming to press against her forehead and prevent her movements. 

“Darling, for gods sakes, hold still.There isn’t beauty without a bit of pain, and honestly, for such a warrior, you’re being a wimp,” he chastises before continuing on with the task.

“What are you doing?” Tav asks through a sharp intake of breath, scrunching her eyes closed as she tries to endure the uncomfortable sensation of her hair being repeatedly tugged at the root. 

“Defining your curls, dear. I’m twisting them around my finger, see?” Astarion responds before coming in front of her and pulling a piece so he can demonstrate the process. Tav watches with a mixture of interest and confusion as he continues, “This will help all your curls to look more uniform. But seeing as you’ve done very little to your hair in all this time, I suppose it would make sense that you’re a bit tender-headed. I promise I am trying to be gentle.” 

Tav grimaces as Astarion continues his task, letting out little squeaks of pain that the rogue pointedly ignores. Eventually, Karlach comes over to return the whetstone she borrowed. The tiefling lingers to chat, which distracts Tav just enough to mostly forget about the pain in her scalp. When Astarion announces he’s done, the woman is genuinely surprised and moves to touch her hair; she is met with a quick swat from the elf.

“Ah-ah!” He admonishes before grabbing a bottle and spraying her hair with another rosemary scented product, “You can’t touch it until it’s completely dry.” 

“Why the hell not?” Tav groans again, suddenly growing impatient. Her stomach growls, and she sighs as she realizes she is also growing hangry. 

“You’ll undo all my hard work! Just wait.” Astarion responds as he stows away all his beauty products, “And anyway, it looks like Gale is just about done with dinner. We can go sit by the fire as you eat and that will dry your hair faster.”

*

Dinner was… acceptable. Gale did the best he could with the two rabbits Astarion hunted that morning, a handful of potatoes, one onion, and a couple of carrots. They did not have the luxury of seasonings most of the time, so it was quite typical for the nightly stews to taste gamey… tonight was no exception. 

Astarion takes a few drinks from Tav’s wrist after she finishes dinner. Once he retracts his fangs from her flesh, he lifts his hand to gently feel her curls. After a moment assessing his creation, he grins at the woman and says, “They’re finally dry, darling. Took long enough, hm? Now, let’s get you in front of a mirror so you can see my masterpiece.” 

Tav is flabbergasted by what she sees in the mirror. For the first time in… well, ever, her hair looks like it belongs to one of the beautiful maidens in an oil painting. Her hand comes up to gently touch the soft, spiraled locks and confirm that this perfect head of hair is, in fact, on her head and not somebody else's. 

“What do you think?” Astarion prompts, his voice containing the smallest bits of apprehension as he lifts a hand to fuss with Tav’s hair, placing it just so.

“It’s great,” Tav responds, her face breaking into a wide smile that causes the tension in Astarion’s shoulders to dissipate, “Thank you… really.” 

Astarion smiles and nods, suddenly unsure how to respond to the genuine gratitude in Tav’s voice. So instead he chuckles a bit and rolls his eyes before saying, “What on earth would you do without me?”

“Continue to look like a sheep in need of shearing, I guess,” Tav jokes, sticking her tongue out as she gently bumps her elbow into Astarion’s rib in jest, “That was mean, by the way.”

“I prefer honest, darling,” Astarion quips with a small chuckle, his fingers still fussing with the woman’s curls, “And anyway, you no longer look like a little sheep. You look beautiful.” 

Tav is not used to being called beautiful. Strong or brave, perhaps, but beautiful… never. Until now. The compliment catches her off guard and her eyes widen for just a moment. The elf notices her shock and his brows crinkle as he pauses the primping to analyze the woman’s face. 

“Certainly you know you’re beautiful…” The rogue continues, his hands starting to work at the curls again, “I’m sure I’m not the only–”

Astarion trails off when Tav shakes her head from side to side as her face begins to blush, the shade of her skin suddenly resembling the shade of her hair. Her voice is quiet, and crackling with a bit of emotion as she says, “No one says that. They just call me strong, or brave… or fierce.”

The elf tilts his head to the side as his eyes roam across Tav’s face once again. How interesting, he thought, to be lauded for things apart from your beauty. He’d never experienced such a thing, himself… though he thinks he would like to. But it almost appeared as if Tav had the reverse experience to his. 

“Well… surely you can be strong and beautiful, hm?” Astarion asks with a raised eyebrow, trying once again to smooth out the awkwardness he felt creeping between them, though he didn’t exactly know why it often felt like that. He moves to affectionately tug another lock of Tav’s hair and smiles playfully, “And with hair like this, dear, no one can deny your beauty. It would be an insult to my skills, frankly.” 

Tav snorts a laugh at this, eliciting a genuine, fang-filled grin from the rogue. Then he produces a bandana from his pocket and flourishes it in front of the woman, “Now let’s get your hair wrapped up. I’m exhausted and I want to go to bed, but I will not allow you to ruin my masterpiece overnight with all your thrashing about in your bedroll. You’re quite noisy, you know? And you snore.”

“I do not!” Tav protests as Astarion clicks his tongue at her and shakes his head, all while bundling her curls into the bandana and deftly tying a knot to keep it all in place. 

“You’re a terrible liar, dear, I’m surprised your nose isn’t growing this instant,” The elf murmurs, his finger coming to affectionately boop the woman’s nose before he bids goodnight and wanders back to his tent for bed.

Tav rubs her own nose as she yawns and heads back to her own tent, on the other side of camp. She tucks herself into her bedroll and smiles as she stares up at the canvas ceiling of her shelter. Someone really said she was beautiful; a small giggle escapes her lips as she thinks about it. 

Before long, Tav falls asleep. And for the first time in a while, she sleeps peacefully, without any thrashing about or snoring. Perhaps it was because her hair – and her heart – were both impeccably well-taken care of tonight. 

#astarion fanfic #astarion fic #astarion x tav #bg3 fanfiction #astarion x female tav #astarion x tav fluff #astarion fluff #astarion oneshot #astarion fanfiction #tav x astarion

[missdaytonawrites]

liar • a. anderson

summary - manny and abby find you alone one night and take you back to the stadium, abby does everything in her power to swallow her feelings about you. even if it means pushing boundaries and lying. (enemies 2 lovers w/ abby's mean ass.)

WC - 4k

cw/tw - 18+ MDNI, post!outbreak abby, mean!abby, afab!reader, talk of guns and infected, seriously abby's unreasonably bitchy, talk of alcohol, abby cannot tell the truth to save her life, dom/sub dynamics, hurt/comfort kinda??? fingering (r! receiving) getting caught (if u squint girl, not really) apologetic!abby. slightly, every-so-barely, for a literal split-second... sub!abs, (mainly sub!r tho..) spitting, tribbing ooooh, abby smokes cigarettes, so does r! apparently, little bit of fluff, i kinda hate the ending?? maybe a pt. II to this will happen idk don't ask lol.

A/N - ..heeey people... here it is!!! i recently (like two days ago recently) gained a pretty serious injury on my pinky toe and i've been literally bed-ridden so i had no choice but to get this out. i love this song, i've heard this song live, this song is so request-this-is-based-on coded so!!!! (*edit* nonnie if u see this i hope u love it mwah) i kid you not i started writing this on the two-hour drive home from the paramore concert and i've just now finished it. i'm super personally proud of this and i will say -- YOU 100% HAVE GOT TO, LISTEN TO THE SONG WHEN YOU READ. with most of my other fics, it's really optional but for this?/!:?):!; put headphones in, turn this song on loop, AND THEN READ!!! it will completely enhance the fic. thanks 4 readin as always, love you crazy bitches.

"love is not an easy thing to admit, but i'm not ashamed of it."

this was fucking gross, the dirt was cold and wet. bordering on mud status and now seeping into the cloth of your shorts & t-shirt as you lay into the earth. you were tired and just needed some rest before you continued on. the old abandoned house you had been using as shelter became over-ran with some infected while you were out one day. so it was back to the forest floor for now.

gross, cold, and wet. the way she had found you, curled up and fast asleep on the ground, she almost wished that she felt bad. she didn’t though, instead for a split second she forgot manny had been following behind her as she took the barrel of her gun to press into the side of your face. she pressed in a little harder and you shot awake at the feeling of something touching your teeth through your cheek. your eyes fly open and they’re met with two shadowy figures above you.

one is a lot larger than the other, the one who had been poking you with the gun crouched down to get a better look at you. through her inspection, manny could be heard behind her muttering something about “we can’t just leave her here, abs.” abby didn’t really care for what he was saying, instead she was silently cursing herself for the emotion that began to crowd her train of thought. abby had toughened herself up enough so these sorts of things wouldn’t happen. she, or the rest of the WLF couldn't afford any emotional attachments. abby didn't need to be going out and developing crushes on sleeping beauties in the woods. yet here she was…

maybe that's why she grew to detest you so severely. treating you so harshly so her mask didn't slip, it was the only way for her. especially the night they found you. she couldn’t even begin to fathom how badly she wanted to just grab you up, take you back to clean you off and keep you safe with the rest of them. instead, she shook you (and manny’s new found excitement, like they found a stray puppy) off, pulling her gun away from your face and stepping about eight feet far from you to speak with manny.

it was back and forth the entire time, manny weighing in all the pros while abby lays out all the cons. true childish banter begins to ensue and abby begrudgingly agrees to bring you back with manny, claiming he’ll “deal with any consequences.” they walk back over to where you lay, awake and pissed. you had just started to fall asleep for fucks sake, “look, you’re coming with us. don't argue and just be grateful that it's we who ran across your ass and not some raider." abby sighs then pinches the bridge of her nose, you would like to argue but the darker haired one looks rather excited for you to be coming, so you bite your tongue for now.

it had been six months since that night… six months of falling in love with your new life at the stadium, six months of manny becoming the closest friend you’ve ever known, six months of training.. six months of a total cold shoulder from abby. you didn't even know if you could call it that, lord knows she never spared her snarky comments towards you at dinner or when the two of you got paired together on runs. always saying something about how you never do anything right, then carrying on while she tells you all the reasons they should've just left you there in the forest to rot.

you take on each day with your head high, trying not to let abby bother you. even if you couldnt seem to crack her fucking issue with you, reminding yourself that everyone else enjoys you and is glad you joined them. especially manny, he was a great pal, always sitting with you at dinner and reading with you. one night he had pulled you out of your book and talked you into having a drink with him, so you did. the two of you passed the bottle back and forth all night, intoxicating yourself enough to blab about abby.

“i just don’t fuckin’ get it, i guess.” taking another swig, you chuckle and hand manny the bottle back. “maybe i just see myself differently than she does.” he looks like he’s thinking and before he can say anything you start again, “does she talk about me? i mean, have i done anything to her that i’m just oblivious to?” manny doesn't say anything, just throws back whatever is left in the whiskey bottle and looks at you sympathetically.

“she doesn't really talk to anyone about things like that, maybe you did.. nobody will ever know.” you sigh and cross your legs. you and manny enjoy the silence for awhile before there’s some shuffling to the side of you two and then just like magic, there’s abby. rearing her mean little head like she heard you twos conversation. much to your chagrin, she did and as she takes her seat next to manny she whacks his shoulder and grumbles something along the lines of “couldn't save any for me..?”

abby's presence captures all of manny's attention while she talks him into going to grab another bottle, you sit uncomfortably and slightly tipsy as she finally convinces him. he gives you a little salute before heading off, leaving you and abby alone. you feel the liquor drop like an anchor in your stomach and your eyelids become heavy, you suddenly aren't sure how much longer you wanna stay.. where did she come from? if she was listening, why? you could have sworn manny said everyone else was out for the night..?

you’re so deep in thought that you don't notice abby has moved closer to you, and has been slowly muttering in your ear this whole time. it isn’t until she is literally snapping her fingers in front of your face, that you pull yourself out of your trance. when you turn to look her in the eyes, you notice just how close she had gotten. taking a sharp breath she starts again, even slower this time, like you wouldn't understand if she were to say it any faster. “i don’t see you differently, i see you for what the fuck you are… n’ i can’t say i’m the biggest fan”

you swallow and feel as if you’ve shrunk beneath her very gaze, “keep my fucking name out of your mouth, got it?” subconsciously scooting away from her, you nod quickly and avert your gaze. she snaps again, and your eyes shoot back to hers. “say it. tell me that you got it through your goddamn head,” and she moves closer. “now!” you squeak out a shaky “got it!” before standing and making your exit. on your leave, you can hear abby laugh at the situation from down the hall.

she has never taken something that far before? you can’t even recall a time she’s been that close to you before. guilt starts to float around you like a cloud above your head. you cannot believe you let her bother you so much that you left without saying a “good night.” or “thank you!” to manny.

flopping face-down on your cot, you conjure an idea; you rummage through all of your belongings to find some pen and paper. you write manny an explanatory note and let him know a little about what happened.

finishing up your letter, you can faintly hear him and abby laughing from your room.

“ah, abs.. you’ll have to get over yourself and tell her eventually.” he sighs and you can hear abby hiss at the thought. “nah man, i’ve already-” and then you remember how shes made you feel before, you decide you’re done eavesdropping and suddenly decide to no longer give manny the piece of paper you had been writing him. crumpling the note, you throw it at the wall and lay down to read.

an entire two weeks pass, you can confidently say you’ve not once thought about abby. her lack of kindness fails to phase you as the days pass. you’ve stopped eating with the group, opting for meals in your room instead. you’ve only really talked with manny only enough to ensure you and abby aren't partnered up for anything. it was smooth sailing for another two weeks, a whole fucking month passes and you cannot believe she’s really left you alone. you honestly didn't think she was capable, but alas, she hadn't even barely looked your way. you can’t help but let your mind race before you sleep about why? was she respecting your request? had manny scolded her? you remembered what manny had told you and settled with the fact that you’d never know.

one night, as you make your bed and pack your bag for the week, there's a quick rasp of knuckles on your door. “heeeeey! i know you’re in here, let me in.” manny, and he sounded drunk. unlocking the door and rolling your eyes, he stumbles in and flops down on your freshly made cot. “we have got to taaaalk..” he hiccups and rolls over to face you, “i need to know, please-” burping and then bursting out in laughter he rubs his eyes and sits up. “what reeealllyy happened that ni-ght.” you didn't think you could roll your eyes back any further than they did at that very moment, practically dismissing him you say: “i don't know what you’re talking about, what night?” burping, he looks at you like you’ve lost it, “c’mon, don't do that. i just want to know if she's telling me the truth…”

in that moment, your head whips around and you’re sure your eyes bugged out of your head. “the truth? what did she say happened?” manny matches the shocked expression on your face for a split second and then erupts in laughter, you worry for what he’s about to say. “look, don’t let this- this, don't tell her i said this.” swallowing and moving closer to him, you sit on the cot with manny while he tells you this extravagant story all about what “happened” that night.

apparently, that night, you told abby to her face that you thought she had a problem with you. apparently, on that same night you also caught an attitude with abby and got in her face. apparently, you stormed off in a drunken rage after allegedly jumping all over her case.

furious, you were so fucking mad. there were simply no words in the goddamned english dictionary to fathom how angry you were with her. she lied! right through her teeth! to manny of all people! about you! there was no holding back anymore, returning to the moment, you spare no gory details as you tell manny what really happened. to say the least? he wasnt very happy, you told him you were scared of her and didnt say anything sooner because you swore to “keep her fucking name out of your mouth.”

the conversation sobered manny up enough for him to apologize on abby's behalf and then exit rather quickly, leaving you to go to bed. you just can’t justify falling asleep, though. not until you make a plan, to your knowledge abby has no reason to be treating you the way she is; the only thing to do now is talk to her. you can be civil, at this point you just need to know why. so in a futile attempt to sleep, you rehearse with yourself what you’re going to say to abby tomorrow.

you wake up to bright sun, bam, right there in your eyes. you practically hiss and you turn away from your window, regaining your vision when your senses are flooded with an overwhelming scent of pine… you thought you were having a stroke, so you sit up and take in your surroundings. upon further inspection, and the realization that you’re definitely not having a stroke, you look around your space and low and behold..

there’s abby. hair falling loosely about her shoulders, still in her pajamas, sitting there just as annoying as the sun. you see her and glare, the tone of your morning immediately shifts and you turn away from her the same way you did with the morning light. grumbling something at her about how she needs to leave and how you two would do this later. you thought your point had been made until she grabs your arm and stops you from laying back down.

“look, i seriously can’t do this anymore.” she pulls you hard enough that you’re sitting up again. “i feel so fucking guilty, i don’t think i could even put it into words.” you almost laugh in her face, actually. “can’t do what anymore, abby? walk around and spew nothing but hate for me?” you realize how close she is and you reach out to shove her. putting some distance between the two of you, she opens her mouth to speak again but you interrupt her. “is it the whole lying to manny thing that made the guilt finally kick in, anderson?”

she returns to her spot in the chair on the far side of your room and sits, she chews her cheek while you rub your eyes. “don’t got anything to say now, huh?” she looks at you like she wants you to finish.. so you do. “i told you to go away, abby. we could’ve handled this later.” she stands up and walks over, sitting and occupying the empty space on your mattress next to you.

“i can’t keep living like this. fuck, fuck!” she shouts and stands, wiping her hands on her forehead. “i don’t know how to do this, and you aren't making it any easier.” you are genuinely astonished, in utter disbelief that she’s the angry one and that you’re gonna have to spell this out for her. “how about sorry? maybe go tell manny yourself that you are a fucking liar?!”

in that very moment, smoke might as well of blown out of her ears like a damn cartoon, “yeah. a liar.” she huffs and sits again. “lied to manny, lied about wanting you to keep my name out of your mouth.. lied about hating you.”

your jaw dropped, mouth literally hanging open as she continues, “i don’t know why, there’s no excuse. i am so fucking sorry.” she moves closer to you and puts her hand on your arm, gentler this time. “i haven’t said this to anyone in years, but i think i love you.” gazing down to her hand on you, then back up to her eyes you swallow the lump sitting in your throat. you don’t know what to say.

“abby, i,” you sigh and chew your lip, “i wish i knew what to say, this is all-” and then her hand moves up, silencing you when her thumb swipes over the expanse of your lips and then rests at the corner of your mouth. she leans into you and offers you two more words, “don’t talk..” then closes the gap between you two.

your lips are like heaven, everything she could have ever wanted. every night when she would fall asleep dreaming of them, this is it and more. she feels like she is fucking floating. she doesn't know what to do with her hands; they tangle in your hair, slide and touch your arms and then come up to cup your cheeks while she pushes into you impossibly further.

she breaks the kiss every now and then to mutter an “i’m sorry.. m’so so sorry, baby.” pulling away completely to admire you. she’s panting so heavily as she goes to pull your tank top up and off, immediately ducking down to take a nipple into her mouth. the cool air of your room hits you, head rolling back and around when you peer down at her, she locks eyes with you. pulling off you with a pop, she comes back up to kiss you again. except this time, its not a makeout, just short desperate pecks all over your face while she hurries to get your shorts off of you.

you help her out and shimmy out of them, completely bare, you fall back on your elbows and spread your legs for her. she lets out a low whistle and shakes her head, chuckling as she whispers, “goddamn foolish to deny myself of this..” bringing her middle and ring finger to rub circles around you.

she moves them down and pushes the two into you, twisting and curling them against your walls. you gasp and drop your head again, hands balling up into fists. abby notices your open mouth and kisses you again, pushing her tounge into your mouth and really fucking kisses you. her free hand rolls your nipple and then wraps in your hair, exposing your neck for her to suck and bite. “pussy’s so good..” whispering against your neck, fingers still fucking you while crude sounds bounce and echo off your walls.

she pulls her fingers out and hovers them over your clit. she looks down at your dripping center, wets her lips, and then looks back at you. “may i?” she asks and brings her fingers to her mouth to taste. her eyes knock to the back of her head and she brings her fingers down to rub you some more, “god, please let me, baby”

while you barely manage to moan out a response abby has already wondrously found her way down to your core, latching herself to your clit. she groans into you while your hips instinctively buck into her mouth. as if the sensation of her devouring you wasn't enough, her fingers plunge into you. writhing beneath her, your hands find a home in abby’s hair; and if her head weren’t literally between your legs, you would have stopped to comment on how soft her blonde locks are.

abby continues to fuck you with her fingers when all of the sudden, her mouth is pulling off of your pussy and delving into your lips yet again. the contact has you whimpering and an unfamiliar heat sizzles in your lower belly. you pull away from the kiss in attempts to speak, but to no avail as she simply just follows you back and keeps kissing you. “don’t run from it, baby.. don’t run from me.” she pulls away from your face and drives her fingers into you, fast and mean and determined.

your breathing quickens and you’re suddenly so much more aware of the way she's leaning over you, the darkness in her eyes, the way she’s heaving as she watches your body react to her touch. you’re close, so, so indescribably close to the edge; just about to explode beneath her when.. knock knock knock!

“abs?! you guys in there?” manny, banging on your door to innocently check the status of you two’s “making up.” abby’s eyes flicker down to yours and her free hand flys to her own lips, pressing a single finger to them, hushing you. “i got this, stay quiet.” she whispers and gives you a peck then clears her throat. “yeah man! we’re all good, just talkin’!” she shouts at him, never once slowing her pace while your orgasm just bubbles within you.

manny laughs, “cool, cool. just wanted to make sure you aren't like.. murdering her or anything.” abby laughs this time, murdering something else for sure, and lets him know you two will be out soon enough. you hear his footsteps trail off, and without a second to think, abby’s kissing you again. you whine against her lips and she coos, practically begging you to cum on her fingers.

“let go, give it to me baby, please.” your legs spasm and she chuckles, bringing her thumb to your clit as you gush onto her fingers. hips circling and following the movements of her thumb while you ride it out, abby watches in amazement. she removes her fingers from you as you come down, and makes quick work of her own bottoms. discarding them on the floor, she grabs one of your legs for leverage and swings one of her own over your torso. positioning her pussy right over your own, she trails a line of kisses down your calf and to your knee. resting her forehead against your leg and huffing when she finally grinds down into you.

your mouth falls agape, and you reach to touch her; any of her. her arms, her hips, her chest. gasping while she bites the meaty part of your calf, you buck into her and she throws her head back at the increased friction.

“such a good girl, y’know that..? so fucking good..” her hips rut back and forth and sweat drips from her forehead and runs down your leg. looking down at where the two of you connect, abby spits on to the both of you and fucks you harder. she’s the one to whine this time, so fucking pent up from living with you for fucking months and not already doing this. guilt starts to grow heavy in her stomach again and she whimpers then kisses your ankle, folding your leg to rest against her shoulder. she looks down at you and cups you face, clit still rubbing against you. “m’sorry.. fuck.” she grips your face harder and her pace quickens, incoherently mumbling out apologies and you feel your second orgasm start to swirl.

you shush at her and move your own hips quicker to keep up, “no, no abby, please..” she throws her head back again and her hands move to grope at your tits, you look up at her with forgiving eyes. nodding, as if to telepathically tell her that it's okay. that you want this and that you forgive her, she nods back and groans as loud as you’ve ever heard. you lightly tap her bicep and bring her back to the moment. whimpering, “gonna cum again, abs, please..”

she breathes and nods her head again, “m’almost there baby, almost..” sniffling, she really pushes down into you and her hips falter just slightly. “want you to cum with me, ‘kay?” she keeps fucking herself against you and you tremble, trying to move with her but you’re too lost in pleasure.

she winces and bucks her hips criminally fast; ushering you, and herself, to finally let go. she pants and sweats above you, her own orgasm crashing into her while you cling to her for dear life. pathetically writhing into her as you begin to unravel yourself. melting back into the bed sheets as she rides the both of you through your highs. her hips begin to slow and she’s kissing up and down your leg again. nudging her nose against your thigh, with a finalizing and triumphant breath.

you slowly creep back into reality and feel abby's weight shift off and away from you, just barely noticing her shimmy her shorts back up. she wobbles out of the room and returns with a damp towel, wiping the two of you down. she lets you lay and rest while she digs in her shorts pocket and pulls out a pack of cigarettes, she takes one out and lights it, and then crawls into bed with you.

she tucks you under her arm and wraps your blanket around you both, taking a long drag from her smoke and flicking the ash somewhere to her side. exhaling and turning the cigarette towards you, she slides the filter between your lips and lets you get a good pull.

it stays this way for a while, quiet and still. wrapped up in eachother, you two finish the smoke together and she puts it out right on your concrete floor. she pulls you in even closer and kisses your head. you sigh and close your eyes, saying it back for the first time, “i love you too, abby.”

jeeeeez, editing this was sooo headache-flavored. anyway! happy reading! wish me a decent recovery, and also?? lmk if you guys want a more in-depth story behind my fucked-up toe or pictures for that matter lol!!!

#abby anderson #the last of us fanfiction #sapphic #tlou fic #abby anderson smut #abby tlou #abby x fem!reader #abby x reader #abby anderson fic #abby anderson angst #tlou fandom #tlou 2 smut #abby anderson x reader #abby anderson imagine #abby the last of us #abby x you

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

Hii so idk if u are planning on doing a part 2 for the stepcest or angst for a part 2 but I was wondering if you could write an angst about how they sneak around and eventually get caught?? It’s ok if ur not planning on a pt 2 😭 love ur writing style btwwww

Yasss I hope you like it! I wanted to post this last night but my sleep meds kicked in before I got to finish this part. There will be a part 3, as long as people want to read it:)

Pleaser - Stepbrother!Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader - Part 2

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Part 1, Part 3

Summary: Your mom and Ethan's dad come home early, catching you in the act.

*there are mentions of a panic attack and some violence-related things, nothing too graphic...except the sex stuff:)*

A/N: I didn't think a lot of people would like the first part of this, and I kinda left this part on a cliffhanger because I love to be dramatic lol. If y'all want a part 3, let me know:)

You frowned when you looked at your phone and saw that your mom and Ethan’s dad would be home in a few hours. It was like everything changed after that first night. You were both loving the time you got to spend together, not just the sex. It really bummed you out that he could’ve potentially been a good boyfriend, but thanks to your mom getting swept off her feet by his dad, there’s no way it could work now.

You could tell that Ethan hated it, too. If it was up to him, they’d never come back, and he’d have you all to himself. He knew it wasn’t right, but he was catching feelings. The only thing that was going to get him through the rest of the summer was knowing that you were going to the same school in the fall. No parents, and no one would know that you were his stepsister.

“Hey cutie, what are you doing?” he asked, as he walked into the kitchen to see you in front of the counter, your back turned to him. He wrapped his arms around your waist and laid his head on your shoulder.

He got concerned when he heard you sniffle, so he turned you around to face him. “What’s wrong?”

You wiped tears off your cheeks as you looked at him.

“Everything’s wrong. THIS is wrong,” you said, your hand gesturing between the two of you.

“I thought you liked the last couple days,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck as he stared at the linoleum tiles on the kitchen floor. He’d be lying if he said his heart wasn’t breaking.

“I did, Ethan! That’s the problem. I don’t want this to end,” you cried, as he pulled you into his arms.

“It doesn’t have to,” he said, kissing the top of your head. “We can make everything work. It’ll be okay.”

“How? There’s no way,” you mumbled into his chest as he soothingly rubbed your back.

“We just have to keep it a secret.”

You hated that idea but knew it was the only option. He stepped back to wipe the stray tears off your cheeks, before leaning down to kiss you.

He started to pull away, but you pulled him back in. Your lips moved so well with his, desperate to go at it again before your mom and Wayne returned home.

“If we’re going to do this, we need to be quick,” he said, pulling his phone out of the pocket of his sweatpants and checking the time. “Dad said they left a little early, so they’ll be here in an hour.”

“Your bed or mine?” you asked, lacing your fingers in his.

“I like yours. It’s more comfortable,” he said, “I should really complain about that.”

“Yeah, then we’d have to explain why you know how nice my bed is,” you laughed, leading him to your room.

He helped you out of your clothes, not wanting to waste a single second of the time you had left. He started to strip, his clothes joining yours in the pile on the floor.

“What do you want, babe?” he asked, his hands running up your sides as you stood in front of him.

“I want to ride you,” you said, his eyes darkening at the thought.

“Since I don’t know how long I’ll have to wait to do it again, can I please eat your pussy first?”

“Please,” you whispered, as he pushed you back on the bed.

His head was between your thighs within seconds, his mouth working its magic. His tongue darted in and out of your dripping core, trying to get every last drop of you.

“Fuck, that feels so good,” you whimpered, your hands running through his hair.

He gripped your thighs as he ate you out, pulling you as close to his face as possible.

His tongue started to focus on your clit, circling it with his tongue before he sucked it into his mouth.

“Oh shit,” you cried out, your grip tightening on his hair. He groaned, the feeling making you arch your back.

You started to move your hips against his tongue as your orgasm began to build, craving that sweet ecstasy. Your brain got foggy as you started to hit your peak. The only thing you could think about was how amazing he was making you feel as you tried to form words.

“I’m gonna-“ was all you got out, before your body started to shake. He slid his tongue back inside your pussy, massaging your fluttering entrance with it.

Ethan loved seeing you like this. The pleasure coursing through your veins and knowing he’s the one that caused it, made his cock throb.

He laid down beside you after he got you through your orgasm. “Come on, baby. Get on top of me.”

You sat up, the tingling feeling in your body fading as you straddled him. Your lips went to his as your pussy rubbed against him. He was gasping at the friction against his erection, but he needed to be inside of you.

“Condom,” he mumbled against your lips.

You sighed as you reached over to the bedside table and grabbed one, making a mental note to put them back under your bed when the two of you were done.

You started to stroke him, a low groan slipping past his lips, before you rolled the condom on him.

You both moaned out when you sank down onto him, before he muttered “So fucking tight.”

His hands went to your hips as you started to move, your pace building up quickly. The palms of your hands were pressed against his chest as you rolled your hips against his. You knew you didn’t have a lot of time left, and you didn’t want to risk getting caught. He watched the way your tits bounced as you rode him, pulling you forward to take one of your nipples in his mouth.

“Fuck,” you whimpered, the position of your hips making it easier for him do drill into your g-spot as his thrusts started to meet yours.

Both of your movements completely stopped though, as you heard heavy footsteps walking past your door.

Ethan’s wide eyes connected with your terrified ones, as Wayne yelled “Ethan, where are you?” from his bedroom a few doors down from yours.

You were frozen in fear as you were still on top of him. “Baby, you gotta get up,” he whispered. You tried to, but it was too late once the doorknob to your room turned, your mom walking in. The smile on her face dropped as she saw you, a look of disgust on her face.

“Get dressed, now,” she said through gritted teeth, your heart pounding in your chest as tears started to form in your eyes.

She walked out, slamming the door behind her. You looked down to see Ethan’s tomato-red face, “Oh my god.”

He wiped your tears away as they slid down your cheeks, “We need to get dressed, baby. You need to get off me.”

You raised your hips as he slid out of you, your body now shaking in your fear. He slid the condom off, throwing it in the wastebasket and quickly putting his clothes on. You heard arguing from the living room as you tried to get dressed, your hands shaking as Ethan came over to help you.

“It’s okay, baby,” he said, pulling your shirt down over your head.

“How the fuck is this okay?” you whispered, as he helped you put your jeans back on.

“Look, I’ll say this was all my fault,” he said, before kissing you for what you felt would be the last time.

“It’s not, though.” Tears flowed down your cheeks as you felt your chest getting tighter.

“Hey, breathe, baby,” he said, pulling you into his chest so he could rub his hands across your back.

You heard footsteps outside of the door again, Wayne yelling, “Ethan, get out here now!”

He pulled away from you, his own anxiety creeping up as he made his way towards the door. The footsteps headed back to the living room as the arguing continued.

You followed Ethan, not wanting him to take the fall for this, even though his eyes pleaded with yours for you to let him.

“Your perverted son took advantage of my daughter!” your mom yelled, anger dripping off her words.

“You said she was on top of him! How do you know it wasn’t the other way around?!” Wayne snapped.

Your mom was about to say something, when she noticed Ethan standing in the doorway, and you right behind him.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, you little creep?” she asked, walking towards Ethan.

“Stop!” you screamed at her. She stopped in her tracks, looking you over. You’d never raised your voice at her. “I’m the reason this happened.”

Wayne scoffed in the background as your mother’s face dropped.

“No, you’re not. Stop talking,” Ethan said, as your mom got closer to Ethan, her hand connecting with his face. The sharp slap made your ears ring as Wayne started to yell. “Don’t touch my son!”

“Your son had no problem touching my daughter!” she screamed. “Get out. Both of you.” She said coldly, looking between Ethan and Wayne.

“Mom, please calm down. I know this is bad, but-“ she cut you off before you could finish speaking.

“I don’t even know who you are.”

A sob slipped past your lips as you felt your chest getting tighter again, your panic attack rushing over your body as you struggled to breathe. Ethan turned to look at you. “Hey, it’s okay. Breathe.”

“Don’t you fucking speak to her,” your mom snapped, pulling Ethan away from you. “I never should’ve trusted you alone with her.”

“Stop blaming this all on Ethan! We don’t even know what the story is!” Wayne yelled, as Ethan started to get mad.

“You want to know what the fucking story is? You two got married before you even asked us how we felt about it! I didn’t plan for any of this to happen, she didn’t either,” Ethan yelled, “I wish you two would’ve thought about asking us how we felt about it, because I would’ve told you I hated the idea of living down the hall from the girl I caught feelings for. Having to refer to her as my stepsister makes me feel so fucking sick to my stomach. I hate this!”

Your mom walked over to you, trying to calm you down when she noticed your breathing wasn’t normal. Your vision got hazy as you struggled to take more than shallow breaths. “Hey, Ethan! Help me!” your mom yelled, as you dropped to your knees.

He bolted towards you, lifting you back up to hold you against him as he swayed with you in his arms, trying to calm you down. His arms around you were soothing, as you started to inhale deeper than you were able to seconds before.

Your mom stood there, watching the two of you. She was still mad, but there were other things she and Wayne needed to talk to you about.

“We’re separating,” your mom said, as you pulled your head away from Ethan’s chest. “We did rush into this.”

Wayne’s head nodded as he stared at the floor.

“Why did you go on that trip then?” you asked, your words still shaky as you calmed down.

“We went on the trip to see if there was any way we could make this work. We ended up heading home early because we knew we couldn’t,” Wayne said, as Ethan looked over to him.

“You seemed so happy,” Ethan said, as Wayne chuckled.

“We didn’t want you two to worry. We were going to make things seem normal until you guys went off to school.”

“We were going to tell you when you came home for Thanksgiving,” your mom said, a hint of sadness in her voice. “At this point, I think we should start to think about Wayne and Ethan moving out, as soon as possible.”

“Yeah, I’ll reach out to my friend that’s a realtor in the morning,” Wayne said, still not looking up from the floor.

You stood there next to Ethan, not sure how to feel. Your mom and Ethan’s dad weren’t showing a lot of emotion.

“I think we need to have a conversation,” your mom said to you, gesturing for you to come with her. Your scared eyes met with Ethans before you followed her through the house and out the side door. You both took a seat on the patio chairs, as she took a deep breath. “How long has that been going on?”

“You mean, how long have I had a crush on him? Or what you walked in on?” you asked, your gaze not meeting hers.

“Were you interested in him before you knew I was seeing Wayne?” she asked, smoothing a wrinkle out of her shirt as she spoke.

“Yeah, I’ve liked him for the last couple years,” you admitted, “I’m sorry if I disappointed you.”

“I wish you would’ve told me,” she sighed, “Maybe it would’ve stopped me from making my mistake.”

She let out a small laugh, as you started to feel sad for her. “Mom, why did you get married without talking to me about it?”

“I don’t know, I think I just didn’t want to be alone. Wayne felt the same way. We both had a child going off to college, and our houses were going to be empty. I knew you’d think we were moving too fast.”

You both sat in silence for a few minutes, deep in thought.

“This thing between you and Ethan can’t happen. At least not while he’s in the same house as you,” she finally spoke. “I’m not sure what people will think, but the marriage did only last a few months.”

“Seriously?” you asked, a smile forming on your lips.

“I need to know though, were you being safe with him?” her heart was pounding as she asked the question, hoping your answer would be what she wanted it to be.

“Yes,” you said, as she let out a sigh of relief.

“I know you’re going to be here with him alone while Wayne and I are both working, at least until they get another house. I’m going to ask Wayne if he’d help me put up cameras in the house. Just so I know you aren’t doing things you shouldn’t be,” she said, as you felt the small glint of happiness fade to anger.

“That’s a serious invasion of my privacy,” you said, before she put her hand up.

“I’m not going to put them in the bedrooms or the bathroom. I just want one in the main hallway, one in the living room, and one in the kitchen. I meant what I said earlier when I said I didn’t know who you are,” you heard the disappointment in her voice again.

“This is stupid,” you said, getting up and walking back through the side door.

Ethan was sitting on the couch talking to his dad as you made your way through the house. His eyes were on you, observing the pissed look on your face. When you walked into your room and slammed the door, he had this awful feeling in the pit of his stomach.

That night, Ethan and his dad went to the store to get the cameras. You soon heard the sound of the drill outside of your door as they mounted a camera to the wall in the hallway. You rolled your eyes, irritated at the sound and the privacy you no longer had.

“Hey, I picked up some food,” Wayne said against your door. As pissed as you were, you were still hungry. You opened the door and took the bag from him but noticed Ethan behind him on a ladder with the drill. His shirt raised up a little, showing his toned stomach as he installed the camera. He winked at you when his eyes connected to yours.

“Goodnight,” Wayne said, moving away from the door. You closed it behind him and pulled out your phone to text Ethan.

You: I can’t believe you’re helping with this

A few minutes after the drilling stopped, you got a response from Ethan.

Ethan: Did you forget that I’m good with technology? I have a plan

You smiled as you read it, curious to know what his secret plan was.

#ethan landry #scream smut #ethan landry x reader #ethan landry smut

[the-dragon-girl-27]

In my previous post i talked about how I have a lotta scrapped MV ideas, well may as well dump some designs i've made based on songs over the years because like I probably wouldn't post these otherwize

also heres a few nice picture of miku from one of em to make you click on this post because its gunna be a long one and all these are hidden below a read more

for the record don't expect me to do anything with any of these, also these are from old to new some of these date back to early 2022 and it shows

This one i posted a storyboard for actually its An Aliens I Love You by Utsu-P.

I gave young Rin a sakura motif with her dress because of miku and rin meeting under a sakura tree, teen miku has a pink ribbion and hairclip to continue this. both rins bow and mikus outfit get darker outfits overtime to sybolize the song getting darker. I also gave adult rin the future rin hair. Miku's "alien" form is more or less how its described in the song tho i was lazy and didn't draw the 4 arms in the refs.

also Lily is Rins mom in this yup there she is indeed.

I actually have a lot of assets finished including the ones above i may show em off one day who knows.

This one is Stained Nocturne by Toa i actually did finish this one

the grey one is when they talk about being colorless

i gave them both very cute and elegent outfits i think it matches the vibe of the song. The starry outfits are the real highlight. if you wonder how I drew em over and over i just copy pasted the stars on their dresses.

they also are very blue because yknow nocturne. I forgot if i dumped the assets for this MV or not maybe next rant post.

This one is Corona by Utsu-P no idea why i did it its probably not even in my top 20 Utsu-P songs i just had some brainworms that wore off. I finished like a minute of it I guess.

I really like rin's outfit. "goth metal astronaut" is such a weirdly specific concept but she absolutley nailed it. 10/10 desin

This one is Garando by Picon. I gave her a like idk what to call it paperboy outfit like the one you see in the MV a few times. her eyes are yellow like bullets because I had this one S teir visual idea. I have some assets for this one i may show off one day.

i also considered doin the sekai ver i really like garando if u cant tell lol

This one is Happy Haloween by Junky another one i finished

Rins is just from the OG mv the rest are themed around the characters

Minori is a dark angel because tenshi no clover is themed around... a normal angel

haruka has candy and a penguin mask because thats her thing

airi is a vampire cuz she has fangs

shizuku is a witch because of her cast a spell on you outfit

This one is NEXT NEST by Satsuki Ga Tenkomori. The cubes are from the original MV image thing. I gave her a super cybernetic look to match the song vibe. I also gave her a plaid skirt to match miku's concept desin because this song is like sorta miku becoming sentient or smth idk been a while since i read the lyrics.

another S teir design. also zamn this ref goes hard lol.

This one is Bluff Liar by EZFG. VY1 doesn't really have a desin so I went with this based on the semi official one (we dont speak of her new official one also i drew this long before that regardless lol) I have a shitty animatic thats 80% stick figures for this. never posted it tho.

tbh i put the file to this ref on an external hard drive cuz this whole video killed my storage because i actually finished it so i yeeted all th assets off my computer as soon as i was finished so i just dowloaded the little thing of assets from this post

not much goin on its kinda just normal ol luka lol

This is Black Hole Artist by utsu-P. its not in project sekai and never will be but it reminded me of Ena so I had this idea. not much to say, I have a few assets for this but nothing really finished.

Another VY1 EZFG song, IDK what my plan was for drawing this over and over. also pretty asthetic ref lol. not much to say i don't draw very cyberish designs so its fun

this is just concept art. this is Roless Weapon by Neru and Inubakumori. yeah those two colabed you wouldnt know cuz this song has no MV. IDK what my plan for this was tbh but like when else would i show this off.

From here on its just concepts lol. this is Atari Front Program by Utsu-P... god how many Utsu songs is this lol

S teir desin i love miniskirt plus pants combo idk its just a vibe.

this drawing sucks lol. this is Live by Mizuno Atsu. Long haired kafu is cute I have better drawings of this in my sketchbook somewhere I think. I might revisit this it would be very simple and cute.

also weirdly my fav part of this aside from her hair is her shoes.

anyway Kafu needs more outfits for songs tbh theres like 3 kafu songs where she has a unique outfit

actually i lied about only having doodles, this is Where Shall We Go by Mellowclle

already made a post bout this

this is my most recent. I sketched this after finishing this art of this song. It is Memento Mori by Buriru

I love this song the creator said its supposed to sound like a mecha anime opening so i went with that vibe. teto looks great, miku doesn't. Teto doesn't really have a counterpart so I assigned miku as her girlfriend lol.

sadly I cannot draw robots so idk what my plan was tho i have a cool visual for the end in my head.

anyway thats everything I could find. does anyone give a crap? probably not but hey character design is fun and i love messing around.

anyway fun trivia more songs i have video ideas for i won't make: Poster Girls Prank - Utsu-P (but with MMJ project sekai)

Stella - Jin

Paranoia - Mezame-P

and probably more i'm forgetting lmfao

#vocaloid #hatsune miku #kagamine rin #kagamine len #megurine luka #lily vocaloid #vy1 #kaai yuki #kafu #kasane teto #hanasato minori #kiritani haruka #momoi airi #hinomori shizuku #shinonome ena #akiyama mizuki #utsu p #project sekai #doodle #maybe i should make a ref tag one day #i probably forgot to tag something #long ass rant #character design

[mera-k1]

Hii!! Can we get a first kiss hcs with TCW and/or AKYR, please? Whether its cute giggly ones or the slow and steady,,,🤲🌹

(((I actually sent an anon ask on this but i got a notif that something went wrong with it lol, but lmk if it actually slides into your inbox:0)))

Have a nice one!

it never did come into my inbox but dw!! hope you enjoy the fluff~ later note: GOT WAY TOO LONG... PUTTING AKYR IN A SEP POST!!

First Kiss

TCW x gn!reader

-fluff, idk u guys kiss 😱, not rlly in order so here's order i wrote in -> yohei, shiki, ryu, saimon

having to watch your boyfriend clean counters and sweep the floor wasn't the most exciting thing in the world. but.. he didn't look half bad while doing it. with the sleeves of his bartender 'uniform' rolled up and his focused expression, you couldn't help but admire him. well, okay.. you hadn't been dating that long but the crush you had on yohei was... you've had to for a little longer than you'd like to admit. so when he accepted your confession, you were extremely surprised that the cold-fronted man had actually accepted.

besides that, you really just had wanted to spend some time with him lately. after all, he'd been working so much! why not take some time off and spend some time with you? that's what you had proposed but-

"i needa finish cleaning, babe."

"oh.."

those were the only words that had been spoken since you had gotten here. letting out a dramatic sigh, you slumped down onto the bar counter that he had just finished cleaning. the damp, cool counter smelled of cleaning supplies and you wrinkled your nose at the sudden strong smell and lifted your head back up to wipe your now wet cheek.

"what're you sighing for?" he looked over after you had let out the dramatic sigh, cloth in hand as he wiped down the opposite end of the counter from you.

"i just wanna spend time with you!" you put your elbow onto the counter, leaning your face into your hand as you stared at him. yohei returned your sigh with one of his own as he shook his head.

"i told you i've-"

"i know what you told me!" you huffed out at him, a pout forming on your face as he walked over to you.

"tell you what," he started, looking at your pouty face. yeah... there was no way he could say no to you now. he was being a little mean, wasn't he? he briefly leaned down, planting a quick peck on your lips before walking back over to the previously abandoned cloth he had been using to clean. "we'll go out somewhere once--" you didn't hear the rest as your face turned pink as you suddenly shot up, shock evident on your face.

"y-you kissed me!" you covered your mouth, half from shock and the other half... you weren't really sure. "that was the first time you've ever kissed me!" he looked over at you, a faint pink color appearing on his cheeks.

"...mh. i- i guess i did."

okay so.. maybe it was a little bit awkward, eating lunch with your boyfriend. or well... new boyfriend. not like you've ever had one before but it felt awkward to sit by him during lunch uninvited. but... it's kind of an unspoken thing that you're allowed to do that, right? you had been friends beforehand but... this whole relationship thing was kinda hard... especially with your shy boyfriend.

"uh- uhm- th-thank you for eating with me, (name)..." shiki mumbled, shyly. his face growing pink with blush. you weren't sure if he was flustered by you unexpectedly sitting by him or if he had just remembered that you two were technically dating after that mess of a confession from you. god, you didn't even want to think about it right now...

"no problem!" you gave him a content smile which seemed to make his face go redder. even though it hadn't been long, you were happy that this sweetheart of a guy was your boyfriend. he might be timid but you still loved him!

"ah.. (name)?" he looked over at you, a hesitant expression on his face. it was almost impossible to tell what he was about to ask you with that expression. it almost looked like pity, but you knew it wasn't- but it also looked like shyness? but he was shy about a whole lot of things!

"what's up?" you asked, trying to keep the conversation casual and not think about the possible question.

"w- would you like to go somewhere after school?" he mumbled, looking down shyly. "ah-! with- with me! if that's okay..." he quickly added. as if it wasn't obvious enough! of course you would love to go on a little date with him!

"of course! why wouldn't it be okay, shiki?" you gave him a smile as he almost immediately brightened up too.

"really?!" you nodded happily in response, getting up from your spot on the bench beside him and gave him a quick kiss on his cheek before taking your bag and rushing off as the bell rang.

"i'll meet you outside your class after school, okay?!" you called as you jogged away, leaving him an embarrassed and blushing mess as he stared at you disappear in shock.

some days, you weren't sure if you should regret asking ryu out. deep down you knew you didn't regret it, of course, but times when ryu was running around the room in a dino onesie, pretending to be a dinosaur made you wonder what you had really gotten yourself into when you asked him out.

"ROARR!! i'm gonna get ya, (name)!!" he made a scary face as he ran over to where you were sitting with his arms outstretched, ready to grab you. you couldn't help but laugh at his childishness when he tackled you down onto the carpet. "iiii... got you!!!"

you both became a fit of giggles after ryu tackled you down, cuddling in closer to you as if being on the floor was a normal occurrence for the two of you. "okay, okay.. it's time to actually get up and ready, ryu." you patted his head as he childishly wrapped his arms around you and shook his head with a pout.

"not yet! just a little longer, 'kay? and then we will blast off, captain!!" he declared, suddenly an astronaut instead of a dinosaur now. you couldn't hold back the laughter that bubbled up inside of you.

"from dinosaur to astronaut? what a drastic switch!" you playfully teased him before he suddenly jumped up, pointing up towards the ceiling (which you assumed he was pointing towards the sky) and brought his finger back down to point at you on the floor.

"yes! we will be blasting off to the moon! astronaut ryu and (name) are making it to the moon!" he declared loudly as you got up from your spot on the ground and walked over to his excited face.

"i'm sure we will, ryu, but it's time to get ready, okay?" you smiled at him before he sighed, seemingly accepting the fact that he couldn't sit and have fun with you all day in his room.

"one thing before we blast off!" he gave a determined look, his hands on his hips. you raised your eyebrows at him as a silent 'go ahead'. "astronaut ryu needs a kiss before he gets ready!" you would have been flustered by his sudden request but seeing him so determined made you forget the blush that had burned onto your face when he said it. leaning in, you gave him a kiss on his smiling face before he cheered leaving you to look at him with a content smile on your face. yeah, he was definitely the one for you.

"you don't have to force yourself, love," the deep, comforting voice of saimon sounded beside you as you both sat on his bed. you wanted to take your relationship a little farther and sleep beside him instead of sleeping in another room whenever you visited him. "take your time."

"no, no it's alright. i trust you and stuff, but i'm just nervous..." you sighed, nerves getting the better of you as you fiddled with your hands in your lap. his hand lifted from its spot behind you and rubbed your back, gently nudging you closer to him.

"you don't have to rush anything, love. i'll wait for you to be ready." he assured you as he rubbed your back, leaning down to kiss your temple.

your hand reached up to touch his face gently, leaning up to reach his face as well now and kiss him. for real this time. although it was your first real kiss with him, it felt so natural and comfortable as his hand held yours, thumb rubbing over your knuckles as you both held the kiss for what felt like minutes till you had to pull away for air.

"...sorry! i should have asked before doing that-" he had a soft smile on his face as you rambled on, flustered that you had done that without even asking him beforehand.

"it's alright, i enjoyed it just as much as you did. nothing to fret over, my love." god... this man would be the death of you without even trying..

#♡ fics ♡ #paradox live x reader #paralive x reader #yohei kanbayashi x reader #naoakira saimon x reader #ryu natsume x reader #shiki ando x reader

[afandommultiverse]

Paper Pusher with CAPTAIN JOHN PRICE

♱ Warnings: absolutely none, just some fluff lol, I guess my manic writing is a warning itself Idk

♱ A/n: please enjoy my own personal brain rot, I wrote this at 2 almost 3am and HAVE NOT EDITED IT but I wanted to post it so bad 🥰 I’m not saying it’s good but it’s indulgent 🫶

♱ WC: 1.8k

⌐╦̵̵̿ᡁ᠊╾━ ♡ ⌐╦̵̵̿ᡁ᠊╾━

Paper work was easy, honestly, you preferred it over all the other things you had to do to get to this position. Sure, the boot camps were fun and were great for making friends in later stages. At the end of the day, you weren’t made for the field work and could barely cover your own ass, let alone any of your teammates. It was quick and easy to find a position on task 141 to help oversee and complete any paperwork for the team. This included many things, from researching for future missions and people, keeping up with any new possible sources or tips while the team was away, asking for permissions of sorts from higher ups, completing summaries for each soldier after missions etc etc. You had a lot to do, but like you said, it was all easy and totally worth it.

“Our little paper pusher, how are you doing hm? Miss us while we were away?” The sound of Soap's voice breached the silence in the office, before steps flooded the room. Soon, you had a group of men huddled around your desk, all looking down at you expectantly. You only looked up and smiled, before looking back to the computer to finish your last sentence of an email, before turning back to them.

“Definitely didn’t miss you that much. I like working in silence, thank you.”

“Sure little bird, that's why we could see you looking at us while landing from your window.” Ghost spoke slyly, and glimpsed in his eyes, telling you that he knew something you didn’t.

“Oh alright, you got me. I was waiting to see if there was still a chance you guys would crash before landing.” You quipped, stood up, and stepped over to the printer, where you picked up several forms and turned back around to face them.

“You know the drill boys, fill ‘em out and get them back to me, here in this office, by midnight.” Groans filled the room, but nonetheless, they each took their stacks of paperwork and even grabbed some pens from the cup sitting on your desk. They filed one by one, closing the door again on their way out. When they were gone, you turned and walked into your storage room connecting to your office, and began rifling for an agreement form you had hidden away somewhere. The original was with Price, but since he wasn’t with the guys when they gamed in, you figured he was busy and didn't want to bother him when you could likely find the paper yourself - well, at least after you got some of these boxes out of the way.

You started from the top, wanting to take things easy, and reduce the chances of any of the boxes toppling on top of you. You searched alphabetically, following first, middle and last words you could have used to code the document or even any acronyms, but still had to find it. After fifteen minutes, you were about ready to five up, but that's when you saw it, balancing on a wobbly shelf with 3 around it blocking it in. In all honesty, it was a wonder you had even seen it, but now that you know where it is, the determination from earlier flooded your system and you began planning your accent.

The footstool was too short, but it was thick enough to hold one of the strong containers, filled with books, and from there you could step on that to reach the boxes. The first box came down easily, a loud smack sounding throughout the room as you threw it down to the floor as gently as possible from your elevation. The second one was a little harder, having to push on to the tops of your feet a bit more, your heel ever so slightly coming off the box underneath you. You felt a slight wobble from the shelf, which in turn made you wobble, but after a quick second you were sturdy again. The second smack was a little less loud, landing on top of the other box a bit more softly from the shorter distance.

When you reach the third box, you step to the tip of your toes, the step stool wobbling under your uneven weight as you balance on top of it, but also balancing against the shelf that keeps threatening to tip back against your weight, pushing the box further from the tips of your fingers. You failed your hands to catch the edges of it, pushing it towards yourself, but the movement made minimal progress. You stepped on one foot, slowly going back to what you were doing, concentrating so hard you didn’t hear your office door open and shut again.

“Need some help with that?” The voice startled you, ripping in half the concentration and balance you tried so hard to maintain in two. It was like dominoes, the shelf pushing back against your surprised weight and falling against the wall at an awkward angle. Unable to control your momentum, you fell forward with it - the tips of your feet pushing the box under you off the stool quickly. Just as you realized you were indeed falling, two arms wrapped around your waist from underneath you. As your brain caught up with the situation, your hands gripping on the shelf so tight from the fear of upcoming pain, however there was none. The strong arms wrapped around your waist and butt to stop you from falling much further, literally holding you up. Finally, the head of someone just underneath your chin staring up at you bewildered, but as he recognized you were okay, you recognized who HE was.

“P-Price?” Your whole body felt warm, looking down at him shocked. He too mirrored your expression, but it soon turned into a cheeky smile and mischievous glint in his eye.

“Just fallin’ all over me now, are you, L/n?” You turned your head away in embarrassment, to which he chuckled before he moved. He set your feet on top of the step stool again, this time with no shifty box of books on top. When you were stable enough, you stood on the stool yourself, already missing the warm arms around you. But when you unlatched yourself from the shelf, you balanced yourself on his shoulders, liking the feeling of the taunt muscles underneath.

“Are you okay?” He asked, looking at you for any injury to which there was none, fortunately because of his quick savior. You felt like you could breathe again, stepping back on the stool and looking at him in all his returning from mission glory.

“Yes, thank you so much, Price.” You felt your sweat cool from the anxious event, stepping down from step still and standing on solid ground again.

“What were you looking for anyway? Want me to grab it?” He offered, turning to look at the shelf to where you were picking through, seeing the final box, and grabbed the stool for himself. Before you knew it, he was handing you the box to look through, and thankfully you found exactly what you needed. He followed you out of the side room, setting the box on your desk, and you turned off the light and shut the door, almost hesitating to turn back around to the man whose whole presence filled your office.

“You should be more careful, or ask for help next time. We can’t have our little paper pusher out on the comp now.” You snorted, turning to face him with a smile, he always had something to say. You walked over your desk, setting down to sit and riffle through the stacks of forms for the next three or so hours.

“You’d only miss me because you’d have three times as much work to do if it weren’t for me, Captain, don’t kid yourself.” He laughed, heading even tilting back a little. You loved to make him laugh, it was one of your favorite things to do, because if you could make him laugh, you got a heart with that wonderfully velvety voice that almost sang to you.

“You only half right, I’ll give you that.” He settled down in the chair in front of me, laying back like he planned to stay longer. He took his hat off, scratching his head, before placing it back on top in its place.

“Oh? What’s this other half hm? Let me guess, my winning personality?” That sarcasm was basically dripping, but he wasn’t phased, smiling at you before saying,

“If it were up to me, I’d say you were a mind reader, Y/n.” You rolled your eyes, a smile tugging at your lips as you tried to get some work done, but you could not keep your eyes off the man in front of you. He looked tired, but he was happy and tired. The mission had been a success, with zero casualties, and benefited greatly from it, with new assets and even some information worth zeroing in on. Something you would no doubt have to fit in your schedule somehow, but nonetheless it was better than the alternative.

“Don’t you want to go get washed up? Go relax with a cigar or something?” You asked after a half-hour of debriefing and catching up. He had taken off his hat completely, hair messy and flat. His eyes were barely staying open as it is, but he kept chatting, offering to help with anything and everything, not wanting to stay a minute longer as he had asked you earlier when you had come in. When you told him 5am, he almost couldn't believe it, as your job started at 8am, but apparently you wanted a head start on the day. In truth, you couldn’t sleep that night, you could never sleep well enough on the night that they were supposed to come back, almost expecting something wrong to happen, and never being able to see them again, never being able to see Price again.

“I’m relaxing here.” He spoke so plainly. Like he hadn’t been up for the last 64 hours. John Price needed rest.

“I thought you would say that, that’s why I sent Ghost a little email.” As if right on que, Ghost knocked on and opened the door. Walking in and up the Captain.

“Heard yer botherin’ the nice lady.” He joked, nudging John's shoulder while looking back at me shocked.

“You're kicking me out? After I saved you?” You stood and rounded the desk, coming to rest on it in front of him.

“You need to rest John, as much as you want to keep working, you can’t. So get some rest and see me in the morning to talk about your summary papers for this mission.” John groaned as he stood, but shot you a smile before following Ghost out. Truthfully, John didn’t need Ghost to leave, he would have left if you asked the right way.

But you knew deep down you wouldn’t have asked him to leave.

#afandommultiverse #fluff #x reader #modern warfare #mw2022 #mwii #soap mw2 #cod mwii #ghost mw2 #call of duty mwii #mw2 x reader #ghost mwii #mw2 2022 #mw2 #modern warefare 2 x reader #john price #price mw2 #price x reader #modern warfare headcanons #modern warfare 2 #oneshots #captain john price #task force 141 #john price x reader #captain price mw2 #captain price x reader

[kanmom51]

JK live 30 July 2023

Part 1

cr./Creators of media used in this post.

JK came to us live after pre-recording his performance for Inkigayo, while waiting at the studio for the live show. It was a pr-scheduled live, and as such, once again, he arranged for the AI translations to run while we were watching it live, which might I say, was abso-fucking-lutely fabulous, as we got front row and immediate gratification. And I will explain it all.

One word to describe it.

SAVAGE

Well, JK style savage that is. Because even while being savage he's being too nice.

But I guess even JK has a limit to his patience for 'army'.

I will talk about what JK had to say in just a second, but first let me address the fuckery that went on.

Who are these people?

No. Really. Who are they?

How stupid can you be?

The live is with fucking translations, there are no excuses. There is no "I didn't understand what JK was saying" going on here.

There is only "I don't give a shit about what he's saying or asking of me because I'm a selfish fuck that wants, no, demands that he address MY comment or question".

And on top of that you got the TKKs, a big chunk of those fuckers up there making their stupid comments.

And all of them with total disregard to what JK tells them or asks of them.

At first he apologises for not being able to react to all comments, even if the fan is rude and entitled. But then it's on repeat. And he addresses it again, and again until JK, Mr. "I love army and they are 70-80% of my and my happiness" loses his patience with that shit as well.

As for TKKs, I guess his way to show them exactly what he thinks about them spamming him in the comments was to actually answer their questions. And boy, was he frigging savage. I was watching it live and screaming, like I couldn't believe he actually said it. JK's like "you really want to know? Well, here you go bitches..."

And let's talk about that a little, or a lot.

JK comes to this live super tired, after sleeping only an hour at night and after pre-recording Seven. Fighting sleep he was saying, and surviving on coffee, lol.

JK was really wanting to share in this live. He wants to have a conversation with army. For us to ask him questions and for him to talk with us, answer our questions, share his thoughts with us. And for the utmost he tried to. He was answering questions, including on the deeper side of things (such as mental health).

So let's get to it why don't we?

JK was sharing with us how he had trouble adjusting to the cameras again. When he performs instead of army having to look at the cameras. If you watch the performance you can actually see the shy smile, that awkwardness, .

He was so cute talking about what he ate - he was given a sandwich from the truck there in his honour, and then he HAD to taste a sandwich from the sandwich truck he had there for the fans. He had to taste it, but he also finished it, lol. So he ended up eating 2 sandwiches. And this is after eating a donut also gifted to him by Pdogg who came to visit him before the pre-recording, lol.

And after all that he went out to eat. But because he ate so much before he couldn't eat much.

So he's stuffed with food and being tired to begin with, now suffering from a bad food coma (which to begin with he suffers of more than others, idk, not a doctor here, but can I make a crazy guess that maybe it's because he stuffs his face more than others when he eats?), lol.

He can't fall asleep, because then he would get swollen, so he's trying to move around and not sleep.

JK tells us he's a little nervous, being a while since he has done a music show. He is also alone there. And we did see how nervous he was during the live interview and the announcement as well.

He talks about idols now days that know how to look at the camera and do ending poses and he doesn't.

This man, someone all these young idols look up to, admire, want to be like, and he's so very humble and unpresumptuous.

JK says how he enjoyed the pre recording and because it ended quicker than expected he got to spend some time with army after.

And it was very fun, his words.

After the show he's going home, wash up and sleep. He needs to sleep (which now we know he didn't do, as he had to do his laundry and stay up real late and not sleep until after he goes live to set some facts straight).

JK says he's sleepy and to wake him up. I think it's safe to say that what follows definitley wakes him up.😑

Some comments were ok and were definitley a conversation starter. Like missing Jin and Hobi, to which he replied that he misses them too. So much.

He's asked if he's not going to pierce his eyebrow again and answers that he won't, that washing up is too tedious with it.

And then it starts, and doesn't end pretty much until the end of the live:

Where is Taehyung?

JK: "He's probably somewhere. I don't keep up with the members all the time, everyone. I don't know either."

This here, my friends, is what TKKs had zero shame to call him a liar for. Now, let's be clear here. JK was not omitting or telling something that could be conceived as a half truth, you know, to cover up a closeted queer relationship.

First of all JK chose to answer the question. He could have easily not read it out loud and answer it. I can assure you there were JM related questions in the comments and JK does choose to answer one of them. But it's his choice as to which he picks to read and answer and which he doesn't. If he wanted to hide his supposed secret queer relationship with Tae, he most definitley did not have to choose to answer that question.

But no, he chose to read it and answer it because he wanted to set things straight. And here is my next point.

JK did not only answer in the likes of IDK or more so "how am I supposed to know?", but he also continued to explain that he's not in touch with the members all the time. He is putting Tae on same level as other members, and just like with the others, he's not in touch with him and has no idea of his whereabouts.

It's also the way he says it: "I don't keep up with the members all the time everyone...". This is meant not only for the person who wrote the comment but for EVERYONE to understand.

And he ends it with "I don't know either". This is him placing himself on the same level of knowledge as us. He, just like us, doesn't know where Tae is, and obviously has not been in touch with him lately.

At this point he's 'amused', snickering at the end of that one. And he continues with saying he'll send him a message saying army are asking where he is.

But that snicker, in my opinion is not really him being amused. I do think he is annoyed by it. Yes, he is smiling and 'laughing', but he's annoyed.

And it of course doesn't end at that. TKKs were blasting him in the comments section.

"Tell Taehyung to do a live broadcast?"

JK: "ok. I'll try telling him." smiling but I don't feel it's about being amused, and more about "what the fuck are these comments? Why the fuck do they think I have any kind of influence over Tae? And why isn't this shit ending?".

JK is asked what he thinks of army. This man clearly loves army. He's been consistent with this since forever. And he's clarified this just lately, his love for those that care about him, those that accept him for who he is. So, when he talks about army, it's not so called army filled with hate and disdain. And those army he loves, to him are incredible and he is always thankful to them. To him we are more than 50% of his life, more so around 70-80%. And that's the foundation he lives on.

Is this the right time to remind you who announced to us all, several times, that he is army too?

JK's having issues with the comments, they are going by too fast he's finding it hard to read them.

He's asked if he sees the comment do this or that, but probably multiple times for multiple things, because he says he sees all the comments but can't read them all and he can't do everything the fans are asking him to do. At this point he's obviously not loving it.

Then he starts to do the if you see this touch your nose, he does, and says before it was ears and touches his ear, and turns around for the "there's someone behind you", which he asked at the beginning to stop saying.

And then he asks "is this young army?"

"they're joking around like this because they're young army, right?"

"then I have to play with you like this, right? okay, I'll play with you. Oppa will play with you"(barf).

And then he goes "saying oppa it's so embarrassing".

Once again JK , as others did too, has something to say about the kind of comments they are getting during a live. But as usual, JK is way too nice about it. He tries, super nicely, to explain he can't mention every comment he sees. He tries to explain he can't read every comment either. And yet they keep on coming, with their not requests but demands and complaints he isn't reading out their comments or doing as they want him to. And he's just too nice. Too bloody nice.

This isn't the end of it folks. But thankfully, in between the shitty comments there are also those comments that JK can work with.

Next someone says JK heals them, and JK answers them by sayings it's also the other way round, that army heals his pain.

Ok, I'm stopping here a sec to say something.

JK is an amazing human being.

He is so mature and humble and kind. Kind and understanding and intelligent.

Yes, these comments are horrendous. And JK, he's addressing them in his humble, kind and over patient way.

And although they keep coming, I do believe at this point that JK won't stop coming to see us. Because of his love for army. Because he sees that there are those that do respect him and his time and the effort he makes coming to us and spending this time with us.

Moving on, JK is asked about another tattoo, says he has no plans for it, as it requires too much work.

"I have to work on music and there's so much to do, so I have no plans for it."

So no tattoos in the near future. Near future being the key word.

JK: something fun recently - performing, seeing army is the most fun for him. (again...). Other than that nothing. The working progress is fun sometimes though.

I mean, he did tell us filming the MV was fun, right?

Again JK is asked about the whereabouts of another member. This time Suga. And again, at this point frustrated, he answers "I don't know where Suga is either".

Yes, this was annoying as fuck, but if you listen to him, that "either", it once again is putting his knowledge about Tae's whereabouts at the same level as Suga. Either or, he doesn't know where they are because he doesn't stay in touch with them regularly.

Another one of those comments:

"I like JK , so I don't want to date you. what should I do?"

after thinking about it and trying to understand the comment: "are you saying you like me but don't want to date me? then please just keep liking me."

I personally think he missed the point of it, or didn't he?

Comment: What do you do when you're sad?

JK: "what do I do? I'm not sad lately. But when I'm sad I just let myself be sad. I completely accept that. However I would make an effort to not make it get any worse, right? either way, I'm the only one that can control that. you should live life like you only live once.

Some would say you don't have to work hard if you live once."

but JK continues: "work hard...living only once...some people try a variety of things because they only live once. it's up to you. I think it depends on the person. I think that's why I try to work hard."

I love this. I love that JK shares these little insights into his inner thoughts and what drives him in life.

He's asked if he's ok, says yes. Is he sick, no he isn't, in English...

And then he reads out the Jeon Jimin, and folks, I know that in Korea taking on your spouses name is not something you do, but the man saw the names, he recognized them, he made a clear decision to read them out loud and to end it with a tiny wittle smirk and a quiet "heh". So yeah, not applicable in Korea, and yeah probably disrespectful to have written that comment to start with, but the man enjoyed reading his surname connected with JM. Plain and simple. Not to mention that it might not be something done in Korea, but he is no idiot and he knows very well that it's something that is done all over the world. Add to that his constant need to be the hyung, so JM 'taking on' his name, it could have been amusing to him is all I'm saying.

But whatever the reason he found it amusing, it was his clear choice to read it out. Unlike "sensitive comments" he clearly stated he would not read out loud nor answer. So there you have it.

Here comes a super cringe comment, one either he didn't understand or more so, he evaded answering.

What do you think about an 11 year age difference?

Cause he does the math, says 1st year of middle school but then goes on to talk about how important it is to get educated, that knowledge is power (which is true, but still irrelevant to that cringy question, lol).

Next JK doesn't read the actual comment but answers: "no! I didn't meet JM during the live broadcast that time." He doesn't read out the question so we don't know what it was. And the translation is weird. He didn't meet him during? Was this about meeting JM for the live or was it about meeting JM after the live? It's really unclear by the answer JK gave.

He follows with: "I would do a live broadcast with Jimin if I could, but timing has to work out with each other."

And see, this is what I was saying about JK's choices. He chose to answer Tae questions with a clear NO. I don't know where Tae is. He didn't contact me (that one is yet to come). And the kicker is the one about living with Tae and the face he makes (again, yet to come).

And when he brings up JM it's about the previous in bed live, answering a question he doesn't even read out, so we don't even know what it was, and then adds how he wants to do that live with JM. So, it's not a no. It's a NOT YET. And the difference there is huge!!

Comment: what do you think about death?

JK: "it's scary. It means you no longer exist on this earth. but I do believe in the afterlife and spiritual things to a certain extent, so I don't know. but I don't think about it right now."

Comment: does he like philosophy?

JK: Nope. doesn't know about it. Doesn't read books. That's why he can't explain things in depth. Says things based off his emotions.

Did I mention this man's intelligence? His emotional intelligence?

See how wonderful the live is when army actually take a moment of thought before writing a comment?

And then it's ruined. Once again.

"Taehyung said that he wants to do a live broadcast with me and do karaoke?"

Now, obviously this was a comment telling him Tae wanted to do a live and Karaoke with him.

And what does he do?

He turns it into a question. "He does?" As in, he, JK, had no idea about it, lol. And the final blow:

Nodding his head and laughing.

And if the final blow wasn't enough, he then repeats it once again: "he didn't contact me."

And the facial expression after that.

Did I say savage? Well, this is JK being savage. Telling it as it is. With a smile to add.

And then again, JK has to address the ass fans. saying there is no one he is ignoring.

Sadly, this isn't the only time he had to say this.

Comment: how do i recover when I am feeling weak?

"I received advice... anyway being positive is better than being negative. And you should probably judge right from wrong well".

"I received advice".

And those who know know.

Comment: what do you do when you are angry?

"I do express my anger. But I'm not very good at controlling my anger yet either... I still lose my temper sometimes."

Emotional intelligence.

Once again says he hasn't seen Barbie yet, but it looks fun.

Cringe time again:

JK: who is we? Congratulation on getting married. Love well. You didn't say it was me. It means you're getting married tomorrow? Congratulations. You must have made a good connection."

JK has changed strategy. Seeing that saying no is getting him nowhere, perhaps turning it around will do the job? I doubt it. But good try JK, lol.

And again people are complaining and he's explaining

"Why aren't you reading my comment? tell me."

JK :"It's not that I'm ignoring those kinds of comments. I do look at all of them. so don't think I'm ignoring you", and I personally would have ended it with - "you fucking entitled little shit".

And then he goes on to read "what do you enjoy eating lately?" and says "I read questions like this... because I can talk about myself".

Again, this live is translated. There is NO EXCUSE not understanding what he is saying. And not only does he explain it, he also gives us an example as to what questions he means. And do you think that helped?

Asked about the dance challenge he explains he's very shy at first and embarrassed, so no... and smiles.

I guess he felt at ease with Mingyu. Anyone else we might get?

Pizza v. chicken = chicken of course.

Doesn't play video games now days. Again said.

Does he have phobias? "I have claustrophobia and probably acrophobia. but he overcomes it with his guts."

No plans to do IG.

Ok, so frigging Tumblr isn't allowing me to add anymore clips, and me, I want to add them, cause there are points to be made.

Hence, me, very unwillingly, turning this post into a 2 parter.

And this, my friends, is end of part 1.

Part 2 to be posted shortly.

Unless, if I decide to add it to the next live, the short live he did same night.

I guess we'll have to wait and see.

#Jungkook #JK #JK live #JK live Inkigayo #JK being savage

[accio-victuuri]

5/27 candy round-up : fan-meet clues, denying drama rumors and everything else. 💋

happy saturday! it’s time for some treats care of mostly wyb @ chunzhen fan meet. it has really been some time since he did one of these. hopefully, he does more before he gets stuck in filming his new movie. we will be getting a new endorsement from him tomo so that’s one to look forward to!

sharing the compilations link of media from today’s event both from cpf & solo fansites!

moving on to the candies…. ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

• The most obvious and probably in your face with today’s event is WYB’s look. Aside from the 🦴 necklace chain peeking from time to time and how his hair brings us back to 2019 WYB. The clothes remind us of that striped top he wore in the l’oreal event where he drew the heart with a mole. It’s also maison kitsune, a brand that ZZ wore in a live event recently too. The glasses for his photoshoot also brings us back to WB night 2020. These things could all mean nothing but to us, it brings back memories. The glasses are particularly sus, cause while i do think it may have something to do with his HK glasses endorsement, i don’t see it on their site as a style he is endorsing currently. It surprised a lot ( if not all ) of the fans cause why is he suddenly 🤓??

2. The Camping CPN is at it again. I don’t usually follow other artists so idk if other mention this too specifically but it’s so interesting how these two decided to pick it up at the same time. Or is this some sort of trend in China too? Either way, during the fan meet he said that he does Camp during his breaks. Plus he mentioned that he did go camping somewhere close to the beach.

He also said something that confused people, when they were talking about “moving camping” and wyb explained it’s like moving your house to the camp because of how one brings a lot of things. the he says: “it means he likes to moves many things...a lot of things...then..” so who is he? why so specific as he? Do you camp with someone who brings a lot of things it’s as good as bringing his house along? I don’t wanna judge XZ lol. cause when we see him, he prefers small bags so you would think he’s okay with not carrying too much. but i also have the feeling that ZZ would bring a lot just to be “ready” when they go camping.

3. When choosing the number for the lucky fans, he picked zone A row 2 number 30 and then when he was asked to change it cause there is no #30, he picked row 3 number 20. 2 & 3. His favorite numbers. This is not new, even @ summer surf shop this was noticed. It’s nice to see that it didn’t change. 23 ( Ai Zhan / Love Zhan )

4. As for some food CPN, WYB said again that he can’t cook and that he can only prepare simple dishes. One day, we will know what these are. I’m thinking he’s being humble about it and if he says he “can cook” people may expect more complicated dishes.

When “spiced beef ( or sauced beef ) was mentioned, he smiled. here is the reference to that if you don’t get it.

In one segment of the show, he was mixing fruits with the yogurt drink and he was asked why he chose lychee. He said it’s because he likes it and likes to freeze it to eat. This reminded cpfs of an LRLG post that said WYB peeled lychees for XZ. It’s so specific of a fruit and then it gets “confirmed” like this!

Xiao laoshi thinks the lychees are too high in calories and doesn’t eat them, but Wang laoshi has already peeled them.

WYB: "Didn't you say you wanted to eat it a few days ago?" Brother X specially went to buy it for you."

🧔‍♂️: “The owner of the stall said that this batch is sweet, try it."

XZ: “Then I'll take it later”

WYB: “Eat later”

• WYB shared about what does when camping and he said what he does is drink coffee. “yes, space out, finish the coffee, and then make another cup, then drink again.”

someone please get him a coffee endorsement! hahahahaha! and the commercial for it will be a scene like this. i really feel for him cause with the statement today from yuehua, this is really a way for him to relax. to camp somewhere quiet and just chill. where no one is following & harassing him.

anyway, it’s cool to see him loving coffee now when in the past he wasn’t seen much drinking it. but at the time of cql filming, xz was the one who loved coffee. is this another way of them adapting each other’s likes?

• While talking about Qingdao ( where the fan meet is taking place ) he was asked if he went there before.. and he stopped and replied, they know better than me. and like he doesn’t even know sometimes what city he is flying to. CPN is that he didn’t want to say when he last went to QD. that’s because there were some talks before that he visited the ADLAD cast ( XZ ) in QD. 🤫

but this could also be him calling out the sisheng fans who “knows” his itinerary and private schedule. 💀💀💀💀💀

There is a new fake story about XZ collecting blind box figures and he complained to WLS that he cannot seem to complete the set he wants. So WLS helped him get it all. This is the set he allegedly wanted :

based on the drama empresses in the palace.

=====================================

The second part of this is Patrick ( XZ counterfeiting account ) refuting the rumors of a drama collab between XZ & Y@ngzi. Whether the account is purely a fan account with contact to XZS or WJJW. An XZS employee or a WJJW employee, the sus part here is how quickly this rumor was denied in XZ’s part. There are so many drama and movie melons coming out and putting XZ’s name on it and they don’t address it. If they do, it’s not as quick as this. 30 minutes from when that melon account rumor started getting traction.

This “speed” of denial is not new, some artists / fan accounts do this too ( like ZLY fan when she was rumored to star in mermaid came out lol ) but it’s uncharacteristic for XZ.

There is also a ! on it, this is the only one with that since the account started posting in 5/2020 where that was used. it’s added for emphasis looks like. you can check the account to see for yourself.

I’m not saying he hates his former co-star. I’d like to think they have a professional relationship as what one would expect with a former co-worker and people who go around the same entertainment circle. But one thing is for sure, he doesn’t want to be associated with her in this capacity. A project using his popularity to get attention when he is already signed on with Condor Heroes. And the last time they went on HS together was about using the same car which last night — y@ngzi was on HS again because that same car was also used by Li Xian ( also a former co-star she is romantically linked with ) proving that the issue was so ridiculous! but somehow, some glass hearted cpfs had doubts. lol. please.

i don’t like talking about our boys and other cps associated to them but his connection with this woman seems to make a lot of cpfs nervous. which i don’t understand. 😂😂😂😂 so i hope those people get some sort of “comfort” with this.

END.

referenced source 📚

#yizhan #bjyx #there is no science here i’m just clowning like i always do

[sweetmariihs2]

🪄My thoughts on Cedric The Sorcerer🌙 (until now)

(not that anyone cares idk i just wanna talk about him, it's a lot of random thoughts and it's messy, but it's fun to read I guess)

Did you like that cute moodboard I did for him? It took me like 10 minutes I loved it. It fits him so well I'm so proud of myself for doing this. The whimsigothic aesthetic matches him so well I wish more people knew it so we would have tons of moodboards and cute stuff of him in this aesthetic it would be so nice. Ok let me start my post

I wanna share some headcanons, talk about my first impressions, it's not really organized I just wrote down whatever I remembered and the result was that. I wanna share my new hyperfocus with more people, that's what I'm doing here today :)

Everything started when I saw this man on Tumblr and though "who's this guy and why is princess Sophia next to him?", when I clicked on the hashtag out of curiosity I understood that it's because he's a character from the cartoon, and I was like "lol another tumblr sexyman again let's move on keep doing my things and interacting with my fandoms" (december 24)

I also mentioned it to my friend on IG bc I saw a reels that was like "you don't have any weird fictional crushes right?" and then proceeds to show us an edit of him with millions of hearts around. I sent it to her and said "omg I saw ppl talking about this on tumblr" and we just laughed a lot because it was something we did not expected (not mean laughs, they were genuine laughs of shock and because that was very unexpected like HOW IN THE WORLD, and she remembered him in the show while I didn't)

Some days later I saw more fanarts of him on tumblr and that made me a little curious, but not enough to search about the subject.

After some days I just couldn't forget him, and that's when I searched his name on youtube purposely trying to find compilations of his funny moments to understand what was happening

And boy I did

At this point was just having fun and laughing thinking "omg another guy who's sassy, has good personality and is another ugly-atractive character that has a fandom on tumblr, I got it, he's very nice" and I went to do other stuff again but this man just DIDN'T CAME OUT OF MY MIND

Just making an interruption here, I loved watching Disney Junior as a kid, maybe when I was six or seven, idk I don't remember, and I was a huge fan of Sofia The First, it was one of my favorite cartoons from Disney Jr alongside Doc McStuffins and Art Attack. AND I JUST DON'T REMEMBER CEDRIC IT'S LIKE I NEVER SAW HIM IN THAT SHOW, EVER. I literally don't remember him being part of the cast i'm sorry Cedric 😭 now he stands out so much to me, he's carrying the whole show on his back. Btw now that I mentioned Disney Junior I would like to say that here in Brazil Sofia First is actually called Little Princess Sofia, and Doc McStuffins is Doctor Toys. Sometimes I call Sofia "Princess Sofia" but I don't even know if that's how they call her in the english version, I watched everything on portuguese 😭 but ok let's move on (I have more things to say related to the brazillian dub, but let me finish my train of thought first)

As I was saying this man just didn't came out of my mind, and I was like "Oh no another hyperfocus where people around me will make fun of me because they will say that he's ugly and that liking kid's shows is something weird 😭 I can't take this anymore" and I tried to deny it but I CAN'T i'm almost making a pinterest board for him, I just accepted my fate (gonna draw fanarts soon and no one can stop me)

I found a list of every chapter he's in and i'm watching every. single. one. of. them. I watched the movie first, and boy this is gave me so much nostalgia because I remember some vague objects and scenes from when I was a kid, I used to love the Disney Princesses, when I got a little older I started watching Descendants, I grew up watching Tangled and Frozen and I swear to god I almost teared up from nostalgia during the episode Rapunzel shows up, and they didn't changed her voice actor, that's what got me. It was like travelling back to a time I didn't even remembered that existed anymore. Because since I haven't seen Sofia The First in about 10 years, I don't even remember anything FROM the show except for some parts, and that this show had so much old Disney energy that I didn't even know made a difference, but it does.

I'm sounding like a granny here but (i'm not even in my 20s yet) it feels like another time, Disney changed so much. Some of the new movies are good, some are bad, I see Disney much more as a company that wants money and makes movies instead of that perfect place where all dreams come true and every girl is a princess (Here in Brazil I never had a dream to go to Disneyland because Disney in the early 2010's invested more in products and blue ray DVDs in Brazil, since the parks were in the United States and we weren't really the target audience for that. So they didn't minded making publicity about it, so I just watched the movies and Disney Junior). Everything felt more magical when I was a kid, I spent my days watching DVDs and sometimes had some Disney princesses themed toys, it was so fun playing pretend that I was a princess and I really felt like one. Rewatching Sofia The First made me feel like this again because they made this show at the time that their public were HUGE fans of the Disney princesses and it has the same characteristics, plots, even styles of the songs and soundtracks, visuals + I watched it when I was younger. It's not just "princesses" it has the whole Disney girly early 2010's magic into it and it made me so bittersweet, even if they tried they could never do nowdays a movie inspired by that time and give me the same feeling as a REAL movie from that time does. Sofia The First: Once Upon a Time was like watching a new movie from that old Disney, one that I didn't saw before, but at the same time I did, and that's the best part. The end of the movie gave me so much nostalgia that I almost cried too. That experience was amazing :")

It gives me the same nostalgia that I feel when I hear that song "a dream is a wish your heart makesss" it makes me cry how I miss to be a little girl again (i'm crying right now btw i'm very intense with my emotions)

(And hell I don't remember Cedric at all, since when he was there the whole time? Now that I know that he's there I'm feeling like really reeeeaaaaalllyy vague memories are trying to come back in my head, but I don't know if my brain is doing this on purpose or i'm just confusing him with an equally vague memory of Cruella. I guess it's the first option, I'm trying so hard that my brain is making up memories. Weird.)

But yeah at first I saw everyone falling to his feet and even though I understood that he was very funny and had a well-writen personality I couldn't really get why people were romantically in love with him. Well um I actually got it, he was a good character and was one more of these strangely atractive characters that people fall in love with, I've been there too. But I just couldn't see what was so atractive that people were simping over him, for me at that moment he was just funny and fits very well the "let's make a fandom" type of character, like for example Preminger from Barbie Princess and The Pauper. But then I thought "idk what i'm talking about i'm demisexual lol let's wait a few days" (That happened before. Many times.)

And I'm like. I don't know what's happening to me I'm so susceptible to weird (in socially non-fandom people's words) crushes and I thought I wouldn't be afected this time. Just so you can have an idea some of my last crushes were: Dr Flug from Villanos, Jackson Jekyll from Monster High, Victor Frankenstein from Okegom, Raggedy Andy, Mettaton from Undertale (and UnderLust), THE Eddie Munson (for a whole year and some months, and I was so bullied after his "trend" ended because people said that his fans were cringe and everything (that's fake lol they are very nice)), 70% of my list are just nerds and sensitive guys with different types of mental illness yay my fav type

and now I think I'm feeling unironically atracted by this man it's just happening really slowly 😭 (DEMISEXUALS ‼️‼️⁉️⁉️💥💥💥💥💥👊👊👊👊)

I'm gonna be honest with you, at the moment I can't decide if I like him or not I'm so confused at the same time that I get it I also don't like how tf am I atracted by this man 😭 and then I'm like hmm he's acually cute let me search for some fanfiction

I'M SO CONFUSED I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE i guess I'll just wait to see what happens

you guys know that tiktok audio "at first I was like 'hmmm feet' as a joke,,,,, but bro....... I don't think that's a joke anymore...." (that's me rn but with Cedric)

Also I would like to take this oportunity that you're listening to me talking about Cedric to say the most important thing that this fandom needs to know:

We need more Cedric representations in Whimsical/Whimsigoth/Whimsigothic aesthetic it's like it was made for him just search that on Pinterest please you won't regret

And I'm here wondering what kind of songs he would listen to. I think he would like dark fantasy music, or witch music. I don't care if he's on medieval era and people didn't had access to a lot of music genres at that time, we are talking about disney nothing is historically correct

I can't help but think about Lana Del Rey but being a huge fan of her songs I don't think that it matches his tastes. I guess he maybe would like Aurora's last album, The Gods We Can Touch. I don't know why, it's the witchy vibes I guess. But I don't know, it's still not something that matches him a lot. EXCEPT FOR THE SONG MIDAS TOUCH FROM AURORA. IT'S PERFECT FOR HIM YOU GUYS SHOULD CHECK IT OUT

The cover isn't giving the aesthetic though, Aurora made this song for a show and then put the show album cover unfortunately. But her aesthetics are usually whimsical and magic, inspired by theatre, greek gods and tarot. This song is so good 😭

And of course there are songs like Everything Matters that fits his vibe but idk it depends on who's listening since it's not about the lyrics. The Innocent has a small part who matches him a little, the whole song has that witchy vibe dancing around the fire, I don't know how to describe it.

Coming back to Cedric I think my favorite scenario is him having an apprendice not too much younger than him. I think it's cute. I've never seen any fics like this (in fact I just read like 5 oneshots which is almost nothing) and if you guys know any let me know. I think it's just nice the idea of living with him and being his apprendice while having like a romantic tension between the two characters. It's cute

Also remember when I said I was going to talk a little more about the brazillian portuguese dub? So, something that I thought was really funny happened to me: In the first season he had his voice actor obviously and I was already used to his voice some time after watching the cartoon. It was very funny to me because the first time I saw a "scene compilation" of him it was in english, so hearing him talk in my language was fun. And btw his voice actor did a really good job voicing him, he (had a similar voice and) was really expressive just like his english VA, so like, really nice 👍

And then at some point in season two, from one episode to another, his voice actor suddently changed????? And obviously I got a little sad because his first VA was really good and I was used to his voice :( but the thing is: The new VA wasn't just a new one, IT'S THE SAME GUY WHO VOICED DR FLUG HERE IN BRAZIL AND I WAS LIKE OMG

THEY ARE SO SIMILAR IN PERSONALITY AND NOW THEY HAVE THE SAME VOICE WITH THE VOICE ACTOR'S MANNEIRISMS AND EVERYTHING (because that VA really has an specific way to talk, he stutter a little, sounds a little ironic but at the time really anxious, make some funny sounds for no reason sometimes like his screams)

I was really upset when they changed all the brazillian voice actors in Villanos, and that Flug didn't had his full-of-personality-and-expressive voice anymore :( the new episodes now have new voices and eveything, and they did their best, but it's not the original voices anymore and it doesn't hit the same yk? And then BAM CELDRIC HAS DOCTOR FLUGS VOICE NOW BITCH TAKE THIS

and the fact that Sofia The First was dubbed even before Villanos came out it's so funny to me

So yeah let me show you guys his amazing work at voicing two of my favorite characters:

After they changed Cedric's voice actor I was a little annoyed by the fact that I couldn't hear Cedric anymore, just Flug 😭 but now I'm slowly getting used to it and it's starting to sound like Cedric again.

Before that happened I could see some similarities between the two but I thought that I was just thinking too much and trying to connect two fandoms that I like, so I just forgot about it. After that happened my mind just blew it all make so much sense right now

And they are so similar in personality that I had to make a list of everything they have in common:

They work for guys that are completely blind to their talents and think that they're just idiots all the time

They have more potential than people think

Their projects/spells always go wrong because people keep disrupting their public moments, and so they are seen and weak and dumb (when they're not)

Science/Magic guys (they keep throwing liquids from one pot to another and saying difficult words, only for someone to stop them halfway and the substance explodes in their face, making them angry because this person once again interrupted their project that was going perfectly)

Self-confidence issues

Anxious mess, are always nervous and scared of something bad happening all the time

Childhood trauma because people never really saw their acomplishments and again and again kept repeating that they are idiots who don't know nothing (when they are geniuses!!)

They say that they're mean and they say that they do mean things when actually they are just really nice. They just choose that path because they think it's the only one that can bring them sucess and recognition in the future, but they were never made for this. They just do that because they want to proof their value to people who can't see it.

At the same time that they are mentally unstable, sometimes their confidence is so high that they start to act arrogant because "they're too smart and their projects are amazing": "I love what I do I'm the best sorcerer/scientist in the world"

But when they need to show that to people something bad always happens (because of other people!) And their plan fails, leaving them with confidence issues

"I'm too smart you guys don't deserve me"

"I can't do anything right omg i'm so stupid"

Their movements and maneirisms are so expressive, they're both skinny and tall and keep making those anxious poses, fidgeting with their hands, always anxious, scared of something, thinking too much and overall being nervous and ankward around their bosses

Boss just treats them as failures and gives them orders, in which they respond in the most submissive and saddest way because they're just miserable and just two little guys who are trying to proof their value in a place where no one even see them as people

But sometimes they are genuinely egoistic and egocentric because duh they're the best sorcerer/scientist out there, hello everybody is gonna know their name when they rule the world bye

They act so stupid and lovesick in their official crushes episodes, it's so funny

And even if we never saw Dr Flug's official face there is a design out there in the fandom where he has black hair with white streaks on his bangs so like 👍👍

Well um I guess that's all I have to say about this subject for now

These are my thoughts 🫶

I feel like I said a lot in a short amout of time but I'm here writing since 04:30 AM and now it's 07:47 AM so like. yikes

#cedric #cedric sofia the first #cedric the sorcerer #cedric the great #cedric the sensational #dr flug #dr flug villainous #disney #disney princesses #sofia the first #Youtube

[platadesangre]

we NEED to talk about jcs 1975 madrid cast!

i have come to make camilo sesto justice

(i finally finished this post yay!)

i may be a bit biased, since this was my first jcs.

short story on how i discovered it

my dad used to be an apostle for a bootleg staged playback jcs in peru during the 70s! they used this version.

he had the cd. he also had the mp3 files. i used his computer, so that was how 13 year old me found it.

those were tough times, bc later i started doing catechesis and i kind of got depressed and started questioning my faith lol. judas' character really resonated with me

since this is a recording, i didn't have any footage to reference, so i made up everything in my mind. (this is why it was a bit weird for me to see the english productions, bc they looked nothing like in my head lol)

now, a bit of historical context for spain in the 70's

camilo sesto was a popular spanish singer and actor who went to see the jcs 1971 broadway production in london. he loved it so much that he did everything he could do financially to bring the show to spain.

spain was in a fascist dictatorship at the time

they fought with censorship for years, that's why the lyrics are a bit different (i'll make a post about that too)

they had to remodel the alcalá-palace theater stage entirely

franco (our dictator) died two days after the premiere (about time lol)

the "ultras" (conservatists) didn't like the show so they did lots of crazy stuff (for example, praying for the cast outside the theater or sending BOMB THREATHS?)

anyways, this was the first official translation for jcs!

on the main cast we have

camilo sesto as jesus christ (he wanted the role from the beggining)

teddy bautista as judas iscariot

ángela carrasco as mary magdalene

here's an old pic of them (and some apostles)

(now that i look at it closely, it kind of looks like a bootleg jcs 1973 lol)

on the recording

it's a stereo recording, so use both headphones or you'll miss out on half of it

musically speaking, it's similar to the og concept album (songs ending on fade-outs and shorter trial before pilate) but it has some interesting choices (teddy, the producer and the voice of judas, took a lot of... artistic liberties)

some things this version has

it adds lots of synth. it's very psychodelic. i understand this can be a turn off for some people

they kinda change the key to many songs. maybe to fit vocal ranges idk

teddy just loves to make up new melodies (please give this man some water)

EPIC GUITAR SOLO in what's the buzz

what's the buzz and strange thing mystifying are separated tracks for some reason

camilo sings so good

cute synth in everything's alright ángela has such an angelic voice she makes such a good mary

the drums and guitars during this jesus must die are so danceable

the BEST simon zealotes i've heard. shit goes HARD. he goes CRAY

i really love this pilate, in my rating he would be the best one

camilo's "¡SALVAOS VOSOTROS!" during the temple is really pathetic lol

damned for all time interlude replaced by synths. the SAX SOLO is also replaced by synth (questionable choice)

cool thing happens during the end of this song that i'll talk about in another post

judas' occasional nervous laughter really adds to his character

also he cries a lot

"you sad pathetic man" part during last supper is... fairly different! (i'm looking at you teddy...)

camilo's gethsemane is epic. he's a baladist singer but MAN he can ROCK

cool harmonica during the arrest

i'll never shut up about our pilate (he nervous laughs too)

herod is so fruity

judas' death really hits different when you were depressed and questioning faith (this version is BRUTAL) also lyrics change (i'll talk about it i swear)

teddy's one of the few judas who sing the i don't know how to love him reprise in the higher scale!! it sounds so painful and anguished

the album continues acceptably

other cool things it has

jesus and judas have this interesting accent difference. since camilo is from valencia, he has this pristine and traditional spanish accent. and teddy is from canarias (also lived in the usa) so his accent is rougher and more, crusty? idk how to explain it but it's neat and stablishes their dynamic a bit. (ángela is from dominican republic! but her accent is barely noticeable)

on the footage aspect, we only have old vhs videos and live audios uploaded on youtube. also some old photos

there is a book about this version. it has some anecdotes (only available in spanish)

now we have a 4 episode mini-series about the odyssey that it was to produce this. it's called "camilo superstar" (i won't be watching it bc it's a bit fan-ficy from what i've seen)

the posts i'll make about this production will be tagged as #jesucristo superstar and #jcs 1975 madrid

you can listen to it on spotify!

or on youtube (playlist made by me)

#jcs #jesucristo superstar #jcs 1975 madrid #jesucristo superestrella #jesus christ superstar #camilo sesto #ángela carrasco #teddy bautista #spain #españa #música en español #musicals #platadesangre #Spotify

[misc-obeyme]

CC 😭😭😭 lesson 30 was a rollercoaster huh. Tbh as a Beel lover, I wasn’t happy w how Belphie was acting here. I asked Beel what he thought of the Angel's Trial and Belphie just cuts him off!! And he made Beel sad and that is unacceptable to me 😤 (he says not to make him mad but no spoilers for og lesson 16 could make me choose not to be a petty bitch when I can) Beel is his own person and too sweet for this shit

Telling Sol his cooking sucks was :((( 0/10 I would've gently reminded him ratios are important especially in baking and just make sure he's not putting anything inedible in there. Or tell him to focus his creativity solely on the plating/presentation bc you eat w your eyes too or smt idk

I kinda found it funny when Sim basically told Luke he was an ugly crier. Poor baby, I hope the egg grants him that wish

I get this was setup for Levi's Little D arc but teasing the truth again makes me wanna bang my head on a wall. I know Lucifer suspects smt abt us. We know Barb knows something

Speaking of Barb, I choose to believe that the Little Ds are gonna be important later and that Beel did eat Number 6 but Barb uh, made sure that didn't happen actually

AHH anon, this lesson KILLED ME. I'm so sorry to everyone who had to read the unhinged post I wrote last night lol.

Okay, see, I was so wrapped up in the Solomon debacle that I forgot about the whole Beel & Belphie thing.

I get that Belphie is being protective, but I also felt like he wasn't really taking Beel's feelings into consideration! I think there's a fine line between being protective and being controlling. And Belphie was right on the edge of that line, imo. When you're being protective to the point that you're ignoring the needs of the person you're supposedly protecting well... it kinda defeats the purpose there, buddy.

I wonder if they're going to kind of expand on that at some point. Have the twins hash it out with each other. Because I think Belphie isn't normally like this, but I think he's still wary of humans. And his concern is overriding his usual consideration of Beel's feelings.

OKAY LET'S TALK SOLOMON AGAIN.

Listen, I've had a little time to calm down, but I am still UPSET.

Now, of course, it's best to remember that this is fiction and nothing in fiction happens the way it would irl. BUT if I had a friend (or romantic interest/boyfriend/etc) who really enjoyed cooking, but for some reason always made gross food, I probably wouldn't lie to them directly. I would do exactly as you suggest, gently remind them of how to follow a recipe and so on. I can't imagine that Solomon has spent all his life trying to learn how to cook and somehow keeps screwing it up? Like considering how much he does it, he should be getting better at it?

And apparently someone told him his cooking tasted bad in season 3 of the OG, but I don't remember that lol. If it's in the hard lessons, that's why I don't remember... I haven't actually finished all the hard lessons of the OG... oops I keep forgetting they exist my bad.

Anyway, my point here is that it doesn't make sense that someone doing something they enjoy all the time wouldn't get better at what they're doing at some point. I get that this is fictional and maybe they have a reason for it, but they need to tell us what it is because I can't take HIS SAD FACE. Normally I'd be like listen sometimes you gotta be honest or whatever, but not like this!! I would've been like what exactly did you do to make the cake taste this way, let's figure it out together... I would help him, not just be all sorry this is gross and leave it at that!

Sorry sorry I'm ranting again. I just love that silly sorcerer so much and his reaction just made me so sad.

I'm so curious about what Luke is finally gonna wish for lol. I feel like Simeon teases him the most out of everybody, he's just so chill and nice about it that it doesn't register as teasing.

I just don't understand why hiding the egg's existence was a good lie while telling Solomon his cake was good wasn't??? Ugh my heart.

AND OH YES LEVI.

I was very upset about that, too!! Like, no you don't understand!! I do need to leave, but I need to get back to you!!

I want to go back, but I don't want to go back! The stress of this is getting to me. Can we please hurry up and be done with this timeline nonsense?! Barb definitely knows something. I just want him to fix things! I think I'd have confronted him about it by now. I don't care what Sol says about not telling people we're from the future, I'd be like Barbatos, my true love, I know you already know, so let's hear it!! What is going on!?!?

I definitely think the Little Ds are going to be important later, too! Something about the fairies seems like it's going to matter as well, but I'm not entirely sure how yet.

Oh no poor Number 6! Even if Barb saved him, I would think being eaten would be rather traumatic lol.

#sorry I kinda devolved into rantings again #I'm still not over this lesson it seems #obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me solomon #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me simeon #obey me barbatos #obey me luke #obey me leviathan #anon asks #misc answers

[fbj723]

my whb progress

as of nov. 11, 2023

i feel like i should've done this when i finished chapter 4 like weeks ago but better late than never ig

general info

lvl: 31

status: f2p

when i started: launch (10/03 my timezone)

ver: erolabs

team setup

post-halloween event my team consists of 5 light chars, 1 some other element (usually either leraye, belial, or paimon)

before that though i did use marbas before minhyeok, though sadly i'll probably rarely use marbas or any of the healers in the future since the artifacts when they work properly heal faster :')

here's my team in action!

here's everyone with their lvls and artifacts!

skill lvls: (normal attack-ultimate-passive)

mammon (cake): 4-4-4

mammon (selfie): 1-3-1

satan (selfie): 1-4-1

beelzebub (selfie): 1-3-1

leraye: 1-3

minhyeok: 1-3

secret club

i mainly focus on mammon, so i'll just be showing those here. i'm 1 story away from completing mammon (cake)'s and 2 stories away from completing mammon (selfie)'s!

materials

i do the absolute bare minimum for dailies and weeklies nowadays. since most of my chars are higher than lvl20 i've just been focusing on unholy board for most of the time i've been playing. as much as i wanna focus on skills i'm kinda held back by the game's very limited access to pies (you can only get them in shop + it's the rng boxes most of the time). hopefully there'll be more options to get pies that aren't purely dependent on rng in the future 😔🙏

i also wish candies weren't rng either, or there is rng but also an option to exchange one type of candy for another. as shown above i have absolutely way too many candies for the other kings and almost none for mammon :'))) the grind truly never ends

overall thoughts / reflection

this section is just something for me to look back on when i do a progress post again in the future. i'll break this down into sections so i can stay consistent with laying out all my thoughts. also this won't be spoiler-free

STORY

i find it somewhat interesting? i can't really put in a bunch of input since we've only explored one of the many areas of hell. i set my game to have a male mc, and there's still a lot of issues with making pronouns consistent :'). i do have a few cgs missing despite completing all the chapters that are out currently but those missing ones might be for future chapters so idk (kinda bothers me a bit to see missing cgs despite completing everything). unholy board stories are also ok? it's pretty tedious to get through so many objectives for only a little bit of story and also all the h-scenes and devil's tango bits in unholy board stories are written like they were made for wattpad lol

GAMEPLAY

tl;dr very tedious lol

addressing the elephant in the room, i'm aware there's still a lot of bugs. i won't be going too in-depth about them since they're only temporary and didn't make that much of a significance towards my overall gameplay so far (aside from the leather gloves not working, but that got fixed in the halloween patch).

i'm glad we have autoclear in resource stages but i wish we had autoclear in story stages as well (and in the future event stages too). it would also be nice if there was an autoplay feature, though that's more of a personal preference since a lot of games i play have that option and i don't get bored from doing everything manually.

the 6-7 stages in chapter 4 seemed a bit unnecessary? the story itself is rather short so i guess i can understand why they would wanna pan out as much playtime as possible, but at a certain point it does get really boring and demotivating to progress. it also sets a certain precedent for future chapters, if the battles in between each small bit of story keep slowly increasing how many stages will chapter 10 have? chapter 20? i honestly would've preferred 3 battles in between each story, or if you're gonna have 5 battles in between each story, have some of the story in those battles. aside from the tutorial, an example would be in chapter 3 right as the angels attacked the hospital and mammon took mc out with him to fight (3-73). those battles could've 1. gave a tutorial on how to use mammon and 2. talk about how strong he is like in the story right after those battles (3-79).

on a different note, i wish the "meta" wasn't so skewed towards all the l cards. as i progressed through the story i would look up guides on bilibili, only to find that most if not all the guides are heavily dependent on l cards (and levi which is the only king i don't have 💀💀), only non-l card would usually be leraye 💀. it also feels a bit unbalanced considering light and dark are usually the recommended element for every battle and can go against literally every element including their own. i wish there would be more opportunities for other elements and characters to shine and hold up well so that even if you don't have certain l cards, you can progress through the game just as well as those with the certain l cards

RESOURCES

i briefly mentioned this while going through the materials i currently have but i wish a lot of them weren't so rng heavy. it really adds to making the game tedious especially when you have to level multiple devils of the same element. having a resource stage for candies and pies would be great. it would also be great to not make everything so expensive ㅠㅠ 116 gems for one (1) candy?? a multi of red keys costing almost 2k gems?? atp i just focus on leveling up rather than getting pulls

GACHA

after the whole 'minhyeok needing yellow keys' situation i've just been hoarding keys and using gems on stuff like ap since i have nothing else to really use them for aside from pies. the gacha rates seem really,,,, sad, and the fact that the bloodshed cards banner is p2w only sucks, which kind of makes me worry for future cards being released. i got pretty lucky with getting both mammon's signature artifacts, as it's one of the requirements to progress through unholy board, but other than that i never really had the best of luck with any of my pulls. i got minhyeok at hard pity, and it took idek how long to get leraye, my conclusion is just that my luck sucks in this game lol

#i just wanna get to tartaros and then ill retire #tartaros is really the only one that interests me but im biased i love mammon too much lol #the most normal mammon simp fr #fbj rambles #whb

[roccinan]

How do you feel when you watch the spin off? What do you think of it? And do you like it? For me, I sort of like eps 1-4, the rest are just meh, I couldn't bring myself to care for the other characters, I tried. And I was very confused, what year the spin off?. It started off good and... Idk. All I can say is that Andres truly belong in the asylum. That man creeps me out. If I were Camille, I ran away the second I saw that creep. Lol.

Hello anon! I couldn't answer you earlier because I didn't get to watch it. But now I've finished it and, hum, I certainly have a lot of thoughts that I'll probably post later LOL.

For now, here are the most fresh on my mind. I agree with you- eps 1-4 were surprisingly good, last one was pretty cool too, ralicia supremacy. I was mostly just surprised I didn't dislike it. Can't say I loved it, or that it's my ideal berlin spinoff, but for all the "factors" against it that Pina chose of his own free will asdfasdf, it turned out surprisingly OK.

Spinoff takes place around 2013, according to Pina. Which messes with the canon timeline so much we'll just have to see it as a parallel universe where time doesn't matter.

I now call spinoff!Andres my wife. I don't know if that's a good thing or not. So unfortunately, I cannot slander my bride like that.

But I liked that he was still a freak. The show didn't try to make him a better person thankfully, but I think a lot of the reviews were complaining about him being an asshole or complaining that he was ruined for not being enough of an asshole, missed the mark a bit. The main problem, if we have to pick one, about him, is that the context around him is too shallow to take seriously. His speeches about love have no substance (and they actually did in lcdp) because the circumstances have no substance. He's putting romance above the heist because well, why shouldn't he lmao? There's no personal stake here, and it's not like he'll get capital punishment for getting caught.

And that "problem" extends to everyone else. Their motives and actions are just very shallow and There for the sake of being there. Like Roi and Cameron could have had a moving romance, but instead Cameron made me cringe very badly with how much she felt like Alex Pina's idea of "hawt gurl with sad past!!" And said "sad" past was actually really fucked up but the story didn't seem to think so!? It wasn't a tragic romance--it was a 20-something musician sleeping with a 15yo fangirl, abducting her, and then traumatizing her so badly she entered the asylum and ended up hanging out with berlin. Like????

I'll say I misunderstood Keila though. Liked her a lot better in the show than the trailers. But everytime I went "oh, I like her uwu" she'd do something that makes me GAG like inhaling Bruce's sweat or licking his spoon asdfasdf Also the part where she confessed her love for him after the snake bite gave me secondhand embarrassment. None of the love stories felt lasting, believable, or touching to me. Probably because there were too many of them and it was even more convenient than lcdp proper!

Bruce was different than I expected. He's insensitive, but not "dumb" like the character descriptions made him out to be. Same as Keila. Everytime I thought "I like him uwu" he'd do something like talk about pubic hair or cover himself in oil/water, instantly making me die.

Damian is Sergio 2.0 and also Martin 2.0, but straight and old. No strong feelings for him either way. But it was funny that Andres got so mad about sharing a bed with him, when he was willingly hopping into bed with Martin LMAO. Also ngl, it stung my little berlermo heart to see Damian and Andres sing karaoke and go on a lover's bike ride together.

Roi was my favorite new member. He felt like a real original character, and his relationships with Cameron and Andres were nicely fleshed out even if they both confused me. Cameron because the romance was shallow to me. Andres because Roi never told us how they met or why Andres took him in. Andres giving Roi advice on temper control is also hilarious. We'll just have to assume that Andres is willing to raise everyone's kid except his own. He even took that one boy to the bathroom asdfasdf

But overall, I agree anon. I just didn't care for the new characters the same way I did the old gang or the cormorants. Maybe because the stakes were too low or because they were always beautiful and perfect (except Damian lol) no matter the situation. I personally think the producers were trying very hard to create new stars with this show, so they aggressively showed off Pina's flashy new blorbos (cameron, keila, bruce, and roi) but you can't force popularity. This is also my conspiracy theory for the lack of Sergio- they knew having the profesor here would take too much attention from the flashy new blorbos.

Not much to say about Camille. Was hoping she'd be cooler/smarter than this, but what kind of smart woman would not see the red flags in Andres LMAO. Wasn't surprised when Polignac turned out to be an asshole either- man just has the face of a jerk. Was disappointed that they didn't have a threesome with Andres. And the smartest person was Camille's friend.

Lastly, SAME ANON LOL Andres was an insane stalker, off the wall crazy and so annoying about it too. I wish Camille would have slapped him in the end, but oh well- at least their storyline didn't end as stupidly as it could have. She got her money at least XD Hopefully she's not dumb enough to reunite with him (and if she's wife no. 4 we know it didn't work out already).

Does the show deserve a season 2? No. Will I watch season 2? Yes LOL

Main takeaways:

Romance 1/10 Heist 7.5/10 Pedro's face 11/10 New characters 2/10 (not sharing all of their backstories or why/how they ended up in berlin's gang was a major weak point imo) Story 5/10

A solid 7/10 if we don't compare it to lcdp.

#anonymous #berlin 2023 #will answer the other spinoff questions in my inbox soon! thanks for the patience anons! #大家好柏林是我老婆 #再见了冷酷帅大叔 #嗨，斗M美人受

[vtforpedro]

long life update - TWs in tags

It feels like it's been ages. I'm so exhausted and in a lot of physical pain. Going on two months of it being the worst it's been right after a couple of months of the best it's been. Chronic pain + grief + trying to get help from doctors who should have their licenses revoked + dealing with a shit relationship with my mom + a good, decades-long friendship ending + the ongoing disability process with the SSA + LAW FIRMS.

I'm so fucking tired. I don't remember if I updated that the appeals council decided not to review my case because the 'judge followed the law' except that he didn't. So, as it turns out, my original attorney (and he did not tell me this) before he left, wrote that if they denied me, it should go to federal district court.

I'm now working with a NY law firm to take my case to federal court because my current law firm believes it has merit, and I guess they do, too. That's how fucked the decision was, and I'm glad my initial reaction of bewilderment and anger was spot on lol

The good news is, it should only take another year! ._.

My neurologist is the worst doctor I have ever come across and I'm quite literally stuck with him with nowhere else to go. I wish him upon no one. I'm so tired of calling the SSA, getting documents to them, signing things for law firms, contacting law firms, getting no responses, and contacting them all over and over again. I am in incredible physical pain, like this actively makes my neuro stuff worse. Everything makes it worse. I have autonomic testing in a few days, and idk if I'll get through it b/c I have to stop the meds that keep me out of the ER two days prior, and it scares me.

My relationship with my mom is fractured and I don't feel like family therapy is actually helping. I had to end a friendship with someone I love and care very much about but who was growing too comfortable mistreating me and I was giving them too many passes 😞 I've known them for the better part of two decades.

It's been over seven months since my cat Isis died. I don't know how. It feels like she was here just yesterday. Yet, all the nights I've sat and talked to her and wept are all too real. I miss her more than I can say. She was my soul cat. I keep thinking about tomorrow and how she'd be so nosy getting into EVERYthing when gifts are opened at Christmas. Having to stop her, move her, laugh because she was just so n o s y and it was hilarious. And she's not gonna be here for that ever again.

I'm having a really fucking hard time tonight. It's just hitting me how god-awful this year has been and how I have a bad week to look forward to before even getting to the new year lmao I have to stop taking so many of my medications 48hrs before 1.5-2hrs of testing to see if we can find out Yet Another Thing Wrong With Me but knowing my luck it'll be 'no findings' and the mystery of why my core body temp plummets to 93.9 in the blink of an eye won't be solved until I have suffered juuuuust enough.

It never ends. Never. I want to give up. I'm so tired of doing this. I don't want to anymore. It never. fucking. ends.

I absolutely cannot say it's all been bad, though. I've met incredible, warm, welcoming, giving, kind people this year. Y'all have helped me more than you know and I'm so so so lucky to be able to call you my friends. This year has sucked for so many of us, but I want to say I'm proud of you, and I love you all very much.

My fic is gonna be printed in a hardcover zine early next year. I participated in a Big Bang for the first time and that'll also go out early next year. I'm hosting a tiny event in my tiny fandom server that I'm super excited about. I have a raffle prize to write (bagginshield !!!! SO EXCITED to revisit the og otp) and a Valentine's gift to write for another fandom.

I posted 401,000 words this year and wrote many more unfinished wips, plus a long one (90k) that I am very invested in finishing.

I painted and drew so much this year. I improved a lot, too! I got a couple of portraits printed from inprnt to see how they looked, and it was MY art, and they were GORGEOUS. I thought I would hate seeing my art professionally printed, but no! I almost cried. They looked so lovely.

My cat Lilly had health issues almost immediately following Isis's passing, but she is doing so well right now. She's blossomed into another cat, and while she's not my constant companion, she is with me so much more than she used to be. When she walks onto my desk I am to stop everything and hold her like baby in my arms until she decides that's enough (or I really need to move) lmaaao she's such a goober. My heart cat. <3

I'm not doing well right now--my MH is bad. Especially tonight. But it felt good to write the good things.

I'm sorry for my lack of replies and kinda disappearing. I'm running on fumes. I hope next year will bring physical relief so emotional relief can happen.

For those of you facing difficulties of any kind, I am holding your hand in spirit.

#vtforpedro personal #vtforpedro medical #tw mental illness #tw medical #tw depressing stuff #tw pet loss #I always wish I have something better to write #gonna try to do everything in my power to make that happen next year

[the-dragon-girl-27]

Fun fact since i just posted some fanart of this song

at one point i considered making a fanmade music video of Where Shall We Go by Mellowcle

I didn't get very far, like at all, but i may as well show off the assets I did make.

gunna add a read more cuz this is a looooong post lol

In the official video Rin and Len have their default outfits so i decided to make my own desins for this, I'm actually really happy with these minus the chalky color of the hair.

I tried to give them a cozy feel because thats the emotions the song gives yknow and i think i pulled that off, the color scheme is also reddish brown because the song is about a coffee shop so i think that is a cool detail. I tend to avoid color schemes like these but I think i managed to make it work. Also I was cookin with Rins hair its so nice, I allways like messing around with the Vocaloids designs when I do this sorta thing I think the curls and making it slightly longer really work with this song. I've never made a len desin for anything so his is more meh lol.

anyway heres one unfinished drawing

this was for the "eiga mite mo ii ne, karaoke demo ii ne, aiteru ka mite miyou ka" part, rin was gunna do a little bounce and len would pop up when his line happens. The mv mostly would be in my normal style rather than this chibi one I think i also planned to use chibis for the part about rain idk

anyway heres some animations these 2 would play back to back

the bell ringing would be.... the bit where the bell rings at the start. IDK why this is so well animated but it is good job me.

imediatley would be followed with Rin's ribbon bouncing cutley

and thats all the assets i finished lol yeah i wasn't kidding when i said i didn't get far but still may as well post em lol I have lots of scrapped animations and video ideas lol for every finished one you see theres a dozen scrapped ones

#vocaloid #kagamine rin #kagamine len #long ass rant #animation #maybe ill dump more scrapped video assets instead of letting em rot in my files lol

[burntblueberrywaffles]

Fic tag game

got tagged by @fangeek-girl ❤️❤️

How many works do you have on Ao3?

I have 7 works but 3 of them are fanfic lol

2. What's your Ao3 word count?

1896 words total. Your girl is definitely one for brevity LOL

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Wednesday, that one drabble I made for The Man Who Killed Don Quixote, and I've been writing for Star Wars (though I haven't posted anything yet) and Mrs maisel (i wrote a whole short fic for that almost a year ago but I forgot about it completely until I found it in my notes apps, I should get around to posting it)  

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I don't have 5 fics total but here's my current count in order:

1-Lies

2-The world's a little blurry

3-Pretend

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes always! the fact that people are READING my stuff and taking time to comment has me 🥺🥺🥺

My writing ao3 isnt linked to my main email adress though so sometimes it takes me a while to respond because I wont see it until I periodically check my fic stats

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

.....Probably The world's a little blurry let's be real (I'm going to fix it it in the next one in the series, I promise!!!)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

akdadhjgsjgd hard to say all my shit is angsty, I guess Pretend?? kind of, it's less of a downer than the other ones. The final part of Come a little closer will have a happy ending though I promise! (already finished writing the end, I just need to write the beginning lol)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No ❤️ I don't think any of my stuff has gotten enough attention for that lol

9. Do you write smut? What kind?

NO my ace ass has no experience with that so I wouldn't know how 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️(I might need to in some future project, fortunately a lot of my friends are perverts (affectionate) so I could probably ask for some guidance if it comes to that LOL)

10. Do you write cross-overs?

No, I'm not a big fans of crossovers in general so certainly have never felt compelled to write one.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

12. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No

13. What WIP you would like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

So many ugh I cant even choose, it's more rare for me to actually finish something than the opposite, that's why I'll never post anything unless the whole thing is finished (only exception is my current series, but that's because I felt like each fic making up the series were self-contained enough that they didn't need to follow up immediatly to work? if that makes sense - plus the first one was a one shot and only thought of how to follow it up after posting it)

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

ANIDALA MY BELOVED

15. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm really good at imagery and emotion (being a poetry writer goes brrrrr)

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

DESCRIPTIONS oh god I'm so bad at it. My fic are vibes only lmao, what are they wearing? where are they? what movements are they doing? NOT IMPORTANT how about I offer you 12 metaphors on how this character is feeling instead. (though I'm forcing myself to work on it haha)

I also struggle with any longer story arc... there's a reason all my stuff is so short lol

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If it's in french it would be pretty fun since it's my ✨first language✨ hehe. For other languages I'd see if one of my friends speak it but otherwise idk if I'd include it bc I don't want to butcher another language, I've seen too many english authors put french through the ringer it's painful 😭

18. First fandom you wrote for?

I guess Julie and the Phantoms? I never posted it but I had a pretty advanced fic for that. unless you count the 13 reasons why fic I posted on wattpas when i was early teen but we dont talk about that

19. Favourite fic you've ever written?

right now it has to be The world's a little blurry, I just love how it came out hehe

20. What fic would you want to rewrite one day?

none right now.

Anyway tagging @nonamemanga @beri-allen @unlifeira @realmermaid333 @suchaladyy @witchysith @king-crimson-works @theycallme-thejackal and anyone else who might want to do it!

#tag game #burntblueberrywaffles