#idk. i am having Emotions over someone elses Idea and i feel very silly for it but!!

[rickktish]

Maybe it's because I'm a product of my time and place, idk, but sometimes the anti-car posts I see come across my feed get to me in a silly and purely emotional way. Because as much as I love the idea of implementing better public transit, both for the sake of the environment and for the impact it would have on citizen's wallets, I actually know that I personally would almost never use it.

Both for practical reasons, since my work covers an extremely broad area and I frequently drive over a hundred miles each way to and from work in a day, but also because my car is a part of my support system. It's a marker of my independence and ability to care for and provide for myself in spite of the fact that I can't live on my own. It's a safe space that belongs to me and isn't limited by someone else's ownership or control over that space. I bought it with my money, and I pay all the insurance and gas and repair costs. When I'm exhausted and feel alone and trapped I can literally just get in and go anywhere, and I don't have to worry about having a panic attack because someone can see me or hear me breathing or be annoyed that I'm taking up space, because it's my space and only mine alone. Sometimes that means driving around the block to the local park, sometimes that means going two or three miles to a grocery store, and sometimes that means picking a road and just driving in a straight line until I feel less crazy again, but none of that would be possible without my car.

I used to walk 20k+ steps in a day, and when I could do that maybe I could go on a walk to clear my head instead, but for the last three years going more than 3k steps in a single day means I have to spend the next day in bed recovering.

And yes, driving-- especially driving stick, which I prefer massively over automatic-- has its own toll. Today I wasn't able to drive the four hours each way it takes to go visit my brother at school like I had hoped because I drove two hours each way to work yesterday.

But because I spent yesterday driving, I got to spend today getting things done that I wouldn't be able to do otherwise. Today I walked around the kitchen to make myself food. I worked on daily tasks like cleaning and organizing, hell, I ate more than one meal today because I could actually get out of bed to do so. I can't do that on a day after I've had to walk around a lot.

If I lived in one of the "walkable" communities that have been cropping up all over my area, I would need to get myself a wheelchair to achieve the same level of independence I currently have, and likely still have less of it because I would need to plan around a whole different kind of fatigue from buying groceries or spending time with friends than I currently deal with. Driving five minutes to the store and spending a thousand steps there leaves me with more steps for things like showering and making dinner than walking five minutes to the store would, and that's so important to me. It's necessary in order for me to have the quality of life that I do, even as limited as I am by my body. I may not be able to work full time, but at least I can spend three days of my week doing a job that I love and value because I don't have to plan around distance from bus stops or adding public transit time to my already-fucked sleep schedule.

I don't know. Mostly I think I get a little bit tired of the posts that spend so much time denouncing the evils of personal cars and declaring that we have to replace them with public transit because I honestly think that ideally, we ought to plan for both. Public transit works really well for people living close together who don't go very far, and that needs to be supported better than it is in most places at present. It's also really good for people who need to go relatively far away at predictable and plannable times. But we shouldn't dismiss cars wholesale as evil; we need to try to strike a balance, for the sake of those whose lives or jobs aren't predictable and plannable, and for those who don't or can't live in communities structured for "walkability."

#rick's rambles #rick’s originals #chronic pain #public transit #public transport woes #personal transit has a very important place in my heart #part of me feels like this might qualify as an unpopular opinion #if only because of the kind of opinions I typically see on my dash #but also maybe not #walkable cities #are all well and good for those who can walk #or stand #or be upright for a number of hours not limited by their health #i've had to navigate a few of them for work on occasion #and i've never felt more disabled more consistently than when trying to get around walkable infrastructure

[flowerpotmage]

I'm hopping on anon for this because it might get too specific (← is definitely exaggerating)and uh. I'm paranoid lol

I have a lot of trouble coming up with anything to say about the whole creativity problem, because I'm on the exact same boat, even down to the abandoning fandom thing. and sadly know plenty of other people in that same position. and I feel, I guess, that big sibling urge to give solutions that would make the problem just disappear, and make everything better. but it's like… impossible, because I can't give you the answers I haven't reached myself.

if it helps any, I don't think there's any pressure to continue or not. this isn't exactly something you can fix or take control over. and as much as we, as readers, want to give support and make it better by showing love and appreciation, it just… doesn't really help in giving the nudge, and getting that mental hurdle out. because all it takes is that one single instance of someone showing distaste or critique, for it to become ingrained and for us to question every single decision. it's especially disheartening when it reaches the point of you looking at something, detesting it, but knowing deep down that if this was done by someone else in the exact same way, you'd be thinking it's amazing.

hardcore fan of tgbd, currently my favourite fic ever, and I'll just say, no pressure and no hard feelings over whatever happens. we're already so incredibly lucky that you shared as much of this amazing story as you did, and I don't think any of us want to see you experiencing emotional anguish over it. even if it comes down to getting one update a year, or the fic being abandoned altogether.

I totally get it. I always want to have the perfect thing to say, especially about things I've experienced myself and it kills me when I don't have the right thing to say that'll just fix it.

all it takes is that one single instance of someone showing distaste or critique, for it to become ingrained and for us to question every single decision.

It's awful bc this^ is exactly what I'm struggling with!! Like I know I posted about the whole RSD + creativity scar thing but oof!! And especially difficult bc there's all these studies about how humans might be wired to remember negatives more than positives as an old survival mechanism but like..... Come ON. It doesn't help, of course, that I have a hard time internalizing compliments being for me, no matter the context or what is being complimented. It's very silly.

But yeah, I just like... idk my biggest struggle is that TGBD has a very special place for me and I remember the excitement and the ideas and the way I was feeling about it and how invested I was (and am) in the characters, but I just haven't been able to get the words flow and then I start overthinking about how it'll be seen and it's....... It's a weird place to be, emotionally and psychologically.

I don't intend to abandon it, that's for sure, but I'm like just... Trying to let it breath, I guess?

Regardless, I really appreciate this ask 💚 knowing someone else has been in the same boat at any point in time and understands really makes me feel a bit better about the struggle haha

#answered asks #there's a few things that help me in my 'between eras' like this #things that just kinda help me relax and make things fun again haha #so i'll probably indulge in those and come back when i'm ready

[universitypenguin]

Hey, can I get some writing advice?

So, after you come up with a story idea what do you do next?

Do you brainstorm for that story? Or make a character profile?

Because I have a story idea and idk what to do next. I read about it and they say to brainstorm but then I'm like "how am I going to right if I don't know who I'm writing? " But then I feel like I'm not doing it correctly.

I know it sounds silly but I would really appreciate some help. 🙏

So, I had to think about this one for a while, because the way I write has changed so much over the years. What I've put together is more geared towards how I used to write when I was developing my skills.

Without further ado, here's my official advice.

The most important thing you can do is realize that not everything you write is gold, and that's fine. Never compare your unedited draft to someone else's published work.

As C.J. Cherryh once said:

"It's perfectly okay to write garbage - as long as you edit it brilliantly."

Be consistent about writing and keep going, even on the days when you're not getting very far. Even on days when you know your writing sucks, write anyways. (They made the delete button for a reason. Go make your mistakes, and cover up the evidence as you see fit.) Forming the habit of writing regularly is what turns you into a writer more than anything.

Step #1: Pre-Writing

When I first get a story idea, I take time to daydream about it. Letting my mind wander is usually the best thing to do in these moments. At first, I don’t take any notes. I just like to see what sticks. If the idea drifts away, I assume it wasn’t meant to be and move on. If it sticks around and keeps circling back, then I know it’s a thread I probably should start spinning. 

Next, I like to do concept maps. The quick diagram with bubbles and arrows that show relationships helps me organize things in a simple manner. This step usually helps me enlarge the plot and figure out what I need and what’s extraneous. 

The most important thing about prewriting is to make sure your story has a solid conflict and at least four parts. These four parts are: 

Introduction

Inciting Incident

Immediate Reaction

Reaction

If these conditions seem to be fulfilled I begin writing.

Step #2: Writing

Step two is writing. Here, I’ve found the best thing to do is write while the idea is hot. This is when I do my best writing, when the emotion is fresh and my mood is just right. However… I usually have an amazing writing day about once every two years. So, I have to do what most mere mortals do. I sit down at my desk, put my hands on the keyboard, and demand of myself that I at least produce 200 words. Once I’ve hit that mark there’s usually some momentum going, which makes the next 200 words much easier.

This is where I write the first four chapters, which are what I listed out above. The introduction, the inciting incident, the character’s immediate reaction, their considered reaction after they’ve had their “off the cuff” reaction, and then I stop. 

Here, it’s good to take a step back and look at what you’ve written. Does the story have enough conflict? How does your character sound and feel? Are you enjoying yourself? I think writing four chapters should be enough to identify if you’ve got a story or if you need to develop the idea a bit more.

Step #3: Developmental Editing

Whatever the answers to those questions are, I usually do some developmental editing at this point. I might not finish the story, but it’s always good to flex your creative muscles and see if you can fix something that’s flawed. 

To develop an idea, I rely on story structure. There are a lot of good resources out there for structure. My first experience with structure was from the 27 scene outline. 

In my opinion, this is a great way to learn how to form a coherent plot. It’s very exact in laying out the story beats a writer needs to hit. That said, it’s also very constraining. I used this to learn how to form a narrative, but since then I’ve become more flexible with my story structures. 

Other plot structures I’ve enjoyed using are the beat sheet from “Save the Cat,” as well as four act structure, and six act structure. Each of these presentations of a story structure has its strengths and weaknesses, so figuring out what methods appeal to your style and what doesn’t work, is very useful. For short fiction there’s a thing called the “seven point” structure which I often refer to even now. Short fiction is not among my strengths… so I have to work harder at it than I would a novel. 

Another great resource for developmental editing is the YouTube channel run by Ellen Brock. She’s an editor and posts really informative videos about things like what type of writer are you, which is a very useful thing to understand when you're trying to write. She also has a phenomenal story structure series that’s one of the best I’ve come across. 

If you’re struggling, turn to other sources of inspiration. For myself, I like to read about the craft of writing. It's always good to remember that inspiration comes and goes, but skills can earn you an income. My book recommendations would be: 

Save the Cat - Blake Snyder 

Plot and Structure - James Scott Bell 

How to Write Dazzling Dialogue - James Scott Bell 

On Writing - Stephen King

Lastly, always remember this quote from Ray Bradburry:

“Write a short story every week. It's not possible to write 52 bad short stories in a row.”

I hope this has been helpful. Also, I love to talk about the craft of writing, so feel free to message me if you have any follow up questions!

#penguin replies #writing advice #story structure #plot development

[jiye0ngs]

Hello, there. I hope i'm not bothering you (idk in what timezone you live, but it's way early in the morning here). I was wondering if you could do more of those "self-sacrificial gf" headcanons into a scenario. Like how would the eleceed characters react seeing their gf cough out blood or faint etc.

If it's too hard, i'll just ask for another HCs 😅 with an s/o who has eye abilities (sharingan, limitless/six eyes, mystic eyes of the dead)

I attempted my best 😪 Jisuk and Kayden immediately came to mind, so here are the scenarios for them.

Just as a heads up: this is written in 2nd pov, and scenarios for OCs will most likely continue to be written in 2nd pov too.

“idiot.”

you laugh, wheezing out a small cough while doing so. it’s barely even a sound — more like a wheeze at this point, with how you could barely even take in air properly through your lungs. still, the sound is enough to make jisuk wince.

“why am i an idiot again?” you ask. jisuk scoffs while looming over you.

“non-idiots don’t just go headfirst into battling a criminal without telling us, you know,” he says this through gritted teeth. lending you a hand, jisuk still rambles on while helping you up. “what the hell is up with you, dude? you going out and taking them on by yourself — do you have any idea how - how stupid that is? you think you’d be fine if you got seriously hurt? huh? how are you gonna explain the way you fainted just now?”

you roll your eyes, open your mouth to bite back a rebuttal - of course, the first thing yoo jisuk does after you nearly die is nag at you - but all words fail when you get a clear look at him.

“hey…” you try to discern the frown on his face, the crease in his brow, the worry glaring bright in his eyes. even as you stood face-to-face with him now, his grip on your wrist was still secure — as if you’d collapse again, as if you’d run anywhere else right now.

silly guy. you pat his head and smile. “i’m alive, jisuk. it’s all good. thanks for finding me and waking me up.”

he looks away, a small pout on his face. “sure. just…i’ll always be here to find you. anywhere, anytime, alright?”

his hand had slid down from your wrist to your own palm, you noticed. chuckling to yourself, you grip onto his hand. even if it meant jisuk switching from being sappy and cheesy to nagging at you while he drags you to the hospital, it’s still worth it.

“you’re alive.”

you spit out the last of the blood onto the sink. taking a blow to the chest sucked. “well, there’s no need to sound so disappointed, mister break.”

kayden snorted from where he stood by the doorway, then walked over next to you. the fight that landed you in this…bloody state was admittedly very bad, one that neither one of you wanted to bring up at the moment, but you could still feel kayden’s emotions seeping out from the stare he was giving you.

from the corner of your eye, you could see him purse his lips. “you didn’t need to take that hit for me.”

you face him, eyebrow raised. “and let you do it? we promised to fight that guy together. i had to help you out too, somehow.”

“yeah, but…” kayden continued looking at you. he sighed, shaking his head. “the worst could’ve happened already. at least you’re alright.”

you bumped your shoulder with his own. “someone sounds worried, eh?”

kayden clicked his tongue. “seriously, what am i gonna do with you?” with another look, his eyes go from teasing to soft, and he shoots you a tiny smile. “look after yourself, i beg. don’t jump into things all the time.”

you snort. “you’re one to talk.” you rest your head on his shoulder anyways. “let’s not get ourselves killed next time.”

he rests his head on your head. “sounds good.”

#eleceed #✐ scenario #✐ writings #kayden break #yoo jisuk

[forever-rogue]

OH I HAVE AN IDEA like an angsty fic where bucky and reader have a miscommunication and it causes a fight between them and they are both like ???? “we’ve never yelled at each other ??? what is this” AND IDK I JUST WANT ANGST

So, head empty, very little thoughts, but I hope this works and you like it 🥺

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You sang along to the music that was playing softly in the background as you showered and got ready for your day. You’d had a late start, easily giving into Bucky and staying in bed for just five more minutes, which had really turned out to be almost another hour. The good thing about being the boss was that you could afford to be late every once in a while. Bucky was in the kitchen, whipping up a quick breakfast before he too needed to leave and go about his day.

“Sugar,” he called out to you as you washed your hair. You could faintly make out his voice as you carried on, but figured you’d be able to make out what he was saying well enough, “I’ve got everything made and prepared just how you like it!”

You thought nothing of it for a moment and continued to wash your hair; but about halfway through the motions, you stopped in surprise. What had he actually said?

“Bucky? Bub, what did you say?” you quickly rinsed out our hair before pulling back the shower curtain as you tried to listen in. Had he really said he was mad?

“It’s all done! I’m done,” he called back as he covered your plate for you to find once you got out of the shower. He grabbed his travel mug of coffee and headed towards the door, giving Alpine a quick pet before leaving, “bye honey. Running late and gotta go - I’m leaving!”

“Bucky!” you almost slipped and fell as you tore back the shower curtain and almost jumped out of the shower. It was still running as you haphazardly grabbed a towel and darted down the hall and into the kitchen. But he was already gone; the only thing that was left behind was the faint smell of his cologne. Swallowing the nervous lump in your throat, you trudged back down the hall to finish your shower. You were already running late and whatever this was - whatever had just happened - would need to wait until later.

Had Bucky really just broken up with you in the midst of a shower? It sure seemed like it right now.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

A heavy sigh escaped your lips as you sat down and stared at your computer screen. You’d had the same spreadsheets and charts pulled up for the last two hours and made almost no progress. You swore that almost every single interaction you��d had with Bucky over the last week was playing on loop in your mind. You were desperately trying to figure out where you’d gone wrong, what had caused him to snap.

In an effort to alleviate your own fears, you’d texted Bucky to get a response from him and see what was going on. But you hadn’t heard back from him. You’d sent three messages before deciding not to bombard him. But still...if he was just up and leaving you after almost three years together, he owed you at least a small explanation.

You opened google and quickly pulled up an apartment search, already resigned yourself to the idea that you’d need to find a new place fast. Being around for too long would be too hard and you didn’t want to subject to more torture than necessary. And Alpine! You’d need to decide what to do with your beloved cat - Alpine loved you equally, how were you to choose who would get the fluffy little thing? And all the friends in common you shared...who would they side with?

“Fuck,” you groaned at nothing in particular and decided to focus on your work. At least that would keep you distracted and your brain focused on something other than Bucky. You would figure out everything else tonight. It would all be fine. This was no big deal; maybe your world was falling apart...but you would handle it. You always did.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When you finally allowed yourself to go home that evening, you were shocked to find the lights on and Bucky in the kitchen. He was on the phone with someone, his new girlfriend or someone like that you immediately presumed, moving about the kitchen as he finished dinner. You choked up as you watched the domestic scene that was so normal to you by now. But this time, it felt so wrong.

You stormed in and for whatever reason, you decided that grabbing a pillow and throwing it at Bucky was a good idea. You picked the soft thing up in your arms and hurled at him, who suddenly realized you were home and yelped in surprise as he dodged the offending object. He raised his eyebrows in surprise as he pointed to the earbuds in ears as he turned back to the stove.

You were seeing red by now as you stormed in the kitchen and ripped his earbuds out. He was so stunned by your sudden actions, he jumped back and offered up a shocked look.

“What the fuck are you doing here!?” you shouted at him as you threw the buds on the floor, half tempted to stomp them, “how fucking dare you!”

“Sugar, what on earth are you talking about?” he grabbed his phone off the counter and ended the call without hesitation. Your chest heaved as you waited for some sort of explanation, “what’s going on? Are you alright?”

“No, I’m not alright! How on earth could I be alright?” you threw your hands up in exasperation as you tried to unsuccessfully hold back your tears. He was so calm and nonchalant about everything it was almost more frustrating than anything else.

“Okay...something is going on. Care to enlighten me?” he tried to reach up and wipe your tears away but you flinched out of his touch, “sugar?”

“Y-you! It’s you!” you cried softly as he motioned for you to explain just what it was about him that was the problem.

“What about me…?”

“You just break up with me this morning and tell me you’re leaving me and then you just come back like nothing has happened?” as soon as the words left your mouth, Bucky’s mouth dropped open. It was news to him that he’d broken up with you, “and you didn’t answer my texts all day! I deserve some sort of explanation!”

“I didn’t...I didn’t break up with you, Sugar,” he stated simply as you tilted to your head in confusion, trying to decide if he was pulling your leg or being honest, “why would I leave you? That makes no sense. I love you - I’m in love with you!”

“This morning,” you whispered softly, “you said you were done and you were leaving. When I was in the shower.”

His brows furrowed as he tried to figure out what exactly you were talking about. But then it hit him and he struggled not to burst out laughing. He gnawed on his lip as he fervently shook his head, “my sweet girl, you...well you heard me correctly, but incorrectly at the same time.”

“What? I-I swear…”

“What I said was breakfast was done and that I was leaving for work because I was running late too,” he explained as you tried to replay all that you had heard. Maybe...maybe you hadn’t heard him correctly at all - and in turn jumped to the worst possible conclusion, “I had to run...I’m sorry I didn’t come into the bathroom and say goodbye. Maybe that would have solved this whole thing.”

“You’re not..leaving me?” you asked as he just shook his head and took the opportunity to wrap his arms around you, “you still love me?”

“I find it both hilarious and concerning that you so easily thought I would just leave,” he kissed the top of your head as you held onto him as tightly as possible, “of course I’m not leaving. You never have to worry about that, sugar. I love you so much, silly girl. You sweet, silly girl.”

“I’m an absolute idiot,” you mumbled as you buried your face in his shoulder. You couldn’t believe that you jumped from A to Z so quickly and without a moment of hesitation, “I’m sorry, Bub. I feel like I wouldn’t blame you if you did want to leave me now.”

“Never,” he promised softly, “even if you do have moments of being ridiculous. Just like I do.”

“If I ever do something so dumb again,” you huffed as you pulled back and looked at those ocean eyes, “just smack some sense into me. But I...you didn’t answer my texts.”

“Texts?” he seemed genuinely confused as he reached for his phone and correctly scrolled through his messages. You could see that there were none from you, “what are you…I was in bad reception today. Blame Sam, that I was just on the phone with, for that one. They probably never came through. I’m sorry, honey. If they’d come in, maybe we could have avoided this whole situation, huh?"

“Some bad luck on top of it,” you hid your face behind your hands and sighed heavily, “James. I..I’m so sorry for everything. I just downright acted like a fool today. I don’t even know where to begin to apologize. I love you, Bub. I hope you can forgive me, but if not...I would-”

“Hey,” he put his hand under chin and turned your face up to meet his own. His smile was lilting and gentle and his eyes soft, “I love you. It’s alright done and forgotten. Are you hungry? Dinner’s just about finished.”

“I love you more than anything,” you whispered as he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, “I just...my emotions were so all over the place today. Like out of control, A to Z. I don’t know what happened.”

“Shit happens,” he dismissed it with a slight scoff as he reached for some dishes, “I’m yours, sugar. Always.”

“Me too,” you agreed as you leaned against the counter, watching him with nothing but adoration. It was then that another realization - and possibly an explanation - hit you. It felt like a punch in the gut, “shit.”

“What?” Bucky asked as he started to plate dinner, “everything okay?”

“Yeah,” you smiled nervously, “just remembered something I forgot to do today.”

“As long as you’re alright…”

“I am,” you promised. You could worry about this later, “hey - I love you so much, Bucky. You know that right?”

“I love you too. Always.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

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#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan

[darthzero22]

Hi idk if your taking requests but i just thought it would be really cute if Crosshair had a really happy/bubbly/positive girlfriend, but one day he sees her REALLY upset and its beacuse some person hurt her and Cross gets PISSED, because he's never seen her upset before and wants whoever hurt her to pay

Hi! I hope you have a nice day! I will open request later, I don't know when, but I will 😊

But I loved your idea, anon! I'm inspired now, so here you go. I hope it's what you wanted, or looks like it.

Crosshair x Fem!Reader

Crosshair, a serious, cold, distant man with a crude personality, fell in love with you, a woman who always sees the positive side of everything. He doesn't remember you ever getting upset, whenever you could you smiled. That would change and he wouldn't take it very well.

Warning: strong language

You and your squad had landed on a planet to get fuel and repair the Marauder after that complicated mission. You went into the city to get a couple of things Tech needed for the ship, and Crosshair had seen you leave the ship with a smile on your face, but when you came back you didn't have that beautiful smile. 

You were upset, very upset. 

You didn't want to talk to him, in fact you didn't want him to know, but he could instantly see that something or someone was upsetting you.

The door to your room opens. Crosshair enters to find you sitting on the edge of your bed with your head down. Something wasn't right, he had never seen you like this, and he felt his stomach clench at the sight of you in that mood.

“Mesh’la"

"Hey, Cross..."

"What happened?”

“I don't know what you're talking about"

“Don't try to hide it from me” he rests one knee on the floor in front of you, to face you.

“I'm not hiding anything from you, really"

"I don't believe you"

"I..."

“Look at me” he grabs your chin gently.

You lift your face to look at him, and Crosshair is surprised. That beautiful smile that characterized you was gone, and now there were only sad and wet eyes as tears wanted to come out, but you did not allow it.

“Is it bad to help people, Cross?” you were suffering all those negative emotions. Anger, sadness and disappointment. “Is it wrong to want to help someone?”

“It depends on the situation"

"I am beginning to believe that..."

"What happened? I need to know”

He starts to get angry because he suspected someone had hurt you.

“When I was returning to the ship, the owner of this port needed help with some boxes that fell on the floor and I helped him, but...”

“But? Mesh’la, come on. I need to know what else happened”

“I accidentally knocked over a box and whatever was inside broke. I don't know what it was, possibly droid parts or something? I was really sorry… I wanted to help him again because I was really sorry, but he yelled at me saying that if I was so bad at helping, then don't help him anymore… and practically pushed me away”

That man pushed you? That guy dared to lay a finger on you? Crosshair felt his blood boiling more and more.

“He… Don't tell me he dared to push you” he grits his teeth, feeling increasingly pissed off.

“Yes… He even called me useless and pathetic. I... I've never been called that before, especially when I tried to help…”

That was disappointment and anger because you couldn't believe that there were such ungrateful people, and sadness because that man humiliated you in public. That man didn't care that you had helped him before, because at the slightest and simple mistake you made he treated you like a useless and pathetic woman.

You didn't want to cry because you were aware that bad things happen, but it hit you hard because you were treated like garbage when you simply wanted to help. Crosshair frowns, you've never seen him so pissed off. He squeezed the bed sheets with his hand, as he had them resting on the edge on either side of you.

“It's silly, I know…"

"Mesh'la"

"I know some people are ungrateful, but I've never been treated like this before...”

Crosshair was about to say something, but he couldn't because you hugged him by wrapping your arms around his neck, as he was still in front of you. He rests a hand on your back and I could feel you start to tremble.

“People turned to look at me and judge me…” you rested your eyes on his shoulder.

"Mesh'la"

Your shortness of breath made another horrible sensation appear in him.

"You're not... crying, are you?" his tone of voice indicated fear and concern.

Yes, you were crying. Crosshair took that very personally, something in his heart hurt. You were his girlfriend, the most important person in his life. You were always in a good mood, you always found it easy to smile, but now you only cried out of anger and sadness. Now it was hard for you to smile. He had never seen you like this before, which made the pain in his heart increase.

“He pushed you, insulted you and also humiliated you… all because you tried to help him”

"I guess..."

Crosshair hugged you back, while thinking of a thousand ways to make that guy pay for what he did. You were so beautiful, unique in this galaxy that someone dared to hurt you, and above all to prevent you from smiling again. He was stroking your back in an attempt to reassure you, and while he was succeeding, it wasn't enough.

"I'm going to kill that guy"

“Cross…"

Before you could stop him, Crosshair stands up and leaves the room. To say he was pissed was an understatement to describe how he was. He exits the ship, meeting Tech who was surprised to see him.

“Where are you going, Crosshair? We have to take off now”

Crosshair simply ignored Tech and with his eyes found the ungrateful man who hurt you from a distance. That man was just tidying up those damn boxes, so he walks over there. He was clenching his fists, it was very likely that he would beat him up, and you got out of the Marauder too to stop him. You didn't want him to get in trouble because of you.

“Hey, you!”

The man turns around when he hears that, and raises an eyebrow as he sees the tall, angry figure of Crosshair approaching him.

“Yeah? Do you need something...?”

Crosshair didn't let him finish speaking because he punched him in the nose so hard that he managed to knock him to the ground. He did not even give him time to recover because he grabbed him by his clothes in the neck area, and forced him to get up and slam him against the wall. That man had blood coming out of his nose.

“What the…?!”

“Shut up! You think you're brave for humiliating my girlfriend?” Crosshair's eyes showed nothing but fury.

“Your girlfriend…?"

"Yeah. That beautiful woman who dared to help a scumbag like you"

"Oh! I don't know what she told you, but it wasn't like that! She broke…”

“Wait. You dare to call her a liar?!”

“No, no…!"

"You are ungrateful!"

"If you don't let go, I'm going to call the authorities!”

“She helped you, you piece of shit. She helped your disgusting ass when she didn't have to! And you dared to push her? You humiliated her!"

“Please, I didn't mean to treat her like that!”

“You made her cry. You have no idea how pissed off I am... A punch will be the least of your problems”

“No!”

Crosshair was going to punch him again, harder than the first, but a hand grabbing his shoulder stops him. That hand was yours, so he lowers his fist.

“There is no need for this!”

“He hurt you! It is more than necessary”

“I don't want you to get in trouble because of me!"

"I don't care"

"Please... Let that guy go”

Seeing those sad eyes of yours convinced him, even though he didn't want to. Crosshair sighs, but before letting go of the man, he knees him in the crotch, and then the guy falls to the ground in pain from the blow. No one dares to mess with you, that message was more than clear.

"You deserve worse, you idiot"

"Stop..." you grab his hand. "Let's go back to the ship"

You begin to walk back to the ship, but before Crosshair kicks one of the guy's many boxes causing it to fall, and therefore whatever was inside to break.

"I'm a little better now, just a little" he said.

"Was all that necessary?

"He hurt you, he had to pay. No one makes my girlfriend cry"

Even though you didn't quite agree with the violence Crosshair used, it made you feel better to know that he really cared about you. You knew he didn't like public affection, so you waited until you were alone back in your ship's room to hug him. He reciprocates the hug by placing a hand on your back, and you rested your face on his shoulder.

"You could have gotten into a lot of trouble..."

"I told you, I didn't care"

"Cross..."

"Nothing you can say will change my mind. You always find it easy to smile, and then to see you like this..." he sighs. "I wanted to make him pay"

"Cross, the reason I always smile is because of you... You make me smile"

Well, Crosshair didn't expect that. A blush appears on his cheeks, he even frowns, but you feel him hug you a little tighter now.

"I hate to see you sad and to see you cry.... You have no idea how much"

"I am much better now... and thanks to you" you raise your head to look at him, and finally smile.

There was the smile that he loved, even though he loved everything about you. Crosshair brings a hand to your face and strokes one cheek with his thumb, then strokes your lower lip.

"No one will ever hurt you again, I promise" he said.

"I know..."

You give him a kiss on the corner of his lips, but he wanted something more, so he moves his face and they make you kiss each other on the mouth. You knew that with him you felt safe, loved, and above all he was the reason for your happiness. To Crosshair you were his life, so if someone dared to hurt you, it was as if someone would hurt him. He wasn't going to let them hurt you again, he wasn't going to let anyone take that smile away from you.

#crosshair x reader #crosshair x you #crosshair #crosshair the bad batch #crosshair tbb #the bad batch #clone force 99 #tbb crosshair x reader #crosshair x f!reader #crosshair x fem!reader

[sidespart]

If you're still doing the made up fic title thing, what about "The Past is The Worst Place To Be. Literally."

OOO okay so, it’s got to be be: cannon verse time travel. Roman centric with Platonic LMAPDR

After the events of POF Roman wakes up back in season one, around the time of ‘dealing with my anxiety’.

And at first honestly?? he’s kinda thrilled. Deceit and Remus are so buried in Thomas's subconscious that he doesn't even have to see them. Logan is a lot less stressed and he and Roman barely fight at all, Patton and Roman are back to being best buds. Everything is just so much less complicated then it is back in the real time and the relief is huge. 

The only thing he doesn’t like is that Virgil is back to being the bad guy but hey! He can just make friends with him earlier this time right? And then everything will be gucci.

Except no. Because this version of Virgil has got no trust built up at ALL. so when Roman tries being friendly towards him Virgil assumes he’s being mocked and lashes out more then he ever did in the original time line.

And, okay, Logan and Roman don’t argue but that’s because...Logan doesn't seem to care. Like, worst case scenario he’s call Roman an idiot and then just leave. There’s no passion or drive behind anything he does, and instead of trying to teach Thomas new things he just repeats facts like a little logic robot.

And Patton - Patton is sad. And Roman knows he’s sad! He knows he gets upset when the others tease him or talk over him - but Patton wont admit it! And Roman constantly trying to check on him is soon seen as Roman badgering/pestering/mocking poor Morality. The audience labels him bully, he's back to being everyone's least favourite character and when he tries to explain all this to the others he gets dismissed because ya know -

He’s just Princy. He’s Thomas's most shallow, silly, fanciful thoughts and no one is expecting the big thinking from him. Or anything from him really. 

And it IS easier. And. And he’s Thomas's hero.

But it’s not right. It’s not home. The others wont even respond to their names because Thomas doesn't know their names. They’re not his friends. 

So finally he starts trying to figure out how he got here, and more importantly how to get back 

(yes okay for the purposes of this story Roman is the most emotionally developed/mature character but he's also still a himbo and it took him this long to actually think to address the TIME TRAVEL WTF but shuuushh shush he’s doing his best)

So he decides to write a story. Put so much power into it that he twists reality back to where it’s supposed to be. Except. His powers don't feel as strong as they normally do. And this story is a lot darker and more complicated then anything he’s ever tried to write himself.

He might need help... and there’s an obvious source of darker creative power just waiting to be unleashed...

Problem is, trying to summon Remus will inevitably bring up Janus too. This was before Thomas chose to get introspective and learn new things about himself - Roman has no idea what revealing them so much earlier will do to Thomas or the others.  Plus - in this time period in the original time line? Roman hadn't spoken to either of them in years. They aren’t friends, he doesn't know how they're going to react to him, or to the situation. They could very well decided to drag him back down to the subconscious with them and with all his other relationships in tatters he’s not sure anyone would try to stop them.

So taking all that on - it’s a lot. It’s scary.

But, being brave when the situation seems hopeless and scary is why we need heroes.

BONUS SCENES I COULDNT FIGURE OUT WHERE TO PUT UNCER CUT:

They have some debate (about idk skipping out on a friend for a job like, something hypothetical but the point is-) Patton assumes Roman and he will be on the same page. But instead Roman is like nope, both arguments are strong man, idk what you want, like he’s very open about having doubts which he never has been before. And you kind’ve have a reverse of POF where, instead of Roman being mad that Patton isn't sure enough to tell him right from wrong, Patton is freaked out because Roman isn't sure enough to know which dream they’re chasing - to tell him what to WANT and it’s all very complicated and messy and feelings are hurt and maybe someone turns into a frog but idk

Virgil and Roman do start bonding during the Dark Side of Disney because Virgil can kind’ve rationalise Roman being nice to him as ‘the Disney influence’ and it’s quite sweet

That immediately gets shot to shit though when Virgil learns Roman is responsible for unleashing Jan/Remus because holy shit he hates them and he JUST GOT AWAY FROM THEM WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU.

Roman needling Logan to the point where he finally looses it and yells and everyone else is horrified and Romans just there like :D :D :D You had an emotion!! You care!! I am helping!

Roman Sanders: Family Therapist, the role no one asked him to fill but by god he is TRYING. 

Roman trying to bond with Virgil by being like hey! look at this cool purple fabric!! Would sure be nice if someone...made something...hoodie-ish...out of it...?? And Virgil's just like: I only wear black. and slams the door in his face. 

#Roman sanders #sanders sides #Virgil Sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #sanders sides fic #fake fic meme #sidespart writes #this could be SO angsty but also SO ridiculous i dig it. GREAT PROMPT NONNY #Anonymous

[illfoandillfie]

I’d love a platonically blurb ab them applying to foster/adopt kids 🥺

i love you for this request but also it made me very soft and emo and how dare you

It ended up being a little less about them actually applying and more just them deciding they wanted to adopt or foster and discussing their options because i can't read but perhaps i could do an actual fic later about the process involved and them meeting their kid and stuff?? idk...dad ben makes me 🥺🥺🥺

Anyway, here's the second last blurb in my Platonically event!

Words: 1,683

Warnings: Nothing much really, discussions about children including pregnancy, adoption and fostering, a little mention of sex but nothing explicit.

“I wanna be a dad.”  You weren’t surprised to hear Ben say it. You’d seen the signs. There was the way he’d befriended and doted on the adorable toddler who’d played his daughter on a TV project. Every day he’d come home and his face would light up as he talked about her – how she babbled little kid nonsense at him all day and how they’d played silly games sitting on the floor of the set while the cameras were set up around them. You’d almost expected him to bring up the possibility of having kids then but he’d surprised you and not mentioned it. You could tell he was thinking about it though which made you think about it too. It made sense to at least discuss it and see where you both stood now that you’d been in the QPR for a while and knew that it worked and that you made a good team. You asked about it one night while you were washing the dishes and Ben was drying them. “Do you ever think about kids? Like having one?” “Yeah, sometimes,” he said, bumping your shoulder gently with his, but the conversation didn’t go any further than that.

It wasn’t until about three months later that you heard him say it. It took one of his mates having a baby with his wife for Ben to bring it up. You’d gone over a couple of weeks after they left the hospital, gifts in hand (a cute little spotty onesie and soft toy elephant that he hopefully wouldn't grow out of as quickly as he would his clothes). It was a lovely afternoon, catching up with the new parents and meeting brand new baby Bertie who just stared at everyone who cooed over him. You each had a turn holding Bertie too, marvelling at how anything could have such tiny hands and such big brown eyes. Ben happened to be handed the bundle of blankets that Bertie was swaddled in as the baby began to fall asleep. He didn’t mind though. When the new father asked if he should take Bertie and put him in his crib Ben waved him off. He said he didn’t mind sitting there a little longer to make sure Bertie really had dropped off. The parents didn’t argue, a little relieved that they were able to take a break and just relax. Both of them excused themselves for a moment to get some more food and use the bathroom which left you and Ben and the sleeping Bertie alone together. Quietly you stepped towards the armchair Ben was in, sitting on the arm so you could run your fingers through his hair. “I wanna be a dad.” Ben glanced up at you as he said it, and you could see how much he meant it. “Let’s talk about it tonight,” you reached out to stroke Bertie’s pudgy cheek as Ben lent his head against your side, his attention turning back to the baby.

Neither of you mentioned it on the drive home. In fact you both specifically avoided mentioning it, though not from fear of what might be said but rather just wanting to make sure you had adequate time to go over it without rushing. Once you were inside, shoes kicked off and the kettle on, you opened the discussion.  “So....a baby?” Ben nodded, as he settled into the couch, body angled towards you, “I’ve been thinking about it for a bit, it’s not just because of this afternoon but that did help. I really want kids and I think I’m at a place where I feel ready to. Is that...is that okay?” “It’s wonderful Ben. Honestly, I’ve kinda been waiting for this conversation for a while. I’ve seen you interact with kids and I knew it wouldn’t be long before you wanted your own.” He laughed and inclined his head in amused agreement, “So does that mean you like the idea?” “Yeah I do.” “Really? Just that I know you weren’t really sure about it when we first decided to be partners.” “I might not’ve been then, but I am now.”  “What changed?” “Well...you, obviously.” “Me?” He seemed surprised. “Look, before we got together I couldn’t imagine being in a relationship that didn’t make me feel at least a little uncomfortable. I figured I’d be single forever and I was okay with that. I’d considered just having a kid on my own – sperm donor or whatever – but that seemed like a really hard thing to do and I wasn’t sure I’d ever want it bad enough to do that. But then you showed me that it was possible to be in a partnership that felt good and, I don’t know, I started thinking about the possibility of having a family with you, and the more I thought about it the more I liked the idea.” Ben smiled as if he was trying not to look as pleased with your answer as he felt, “So we’re doing this then? For real?” “Yeah I think so. Weird.” “Bit weird.” There was a pause as you both just sat with the knowledge that you were planning a future together, that you both wanted to go ahead with it. You never would have guessed you’d get to that point with anyone.

Ben was the one to break the moment, “How would you want to...I mean how should we...How do you feel about being pregnant?” You bit your lip in thought, “I’m not sure. Honestly, it still kinda freaks me out.” “That’s understandable.” “I mean, if it was a dealbreaker for you then I would. I’m not entirely against the idea of carrying our baby and it would mean we’d get to do the fun part of making it.” “We do the fun part a lot as is,” Ben laughed, “But it’s actually something I thought about a lot.” “The fun part? That doesn’t surprise me.” “No, the you being preggers part,” he said exasperatedly, “I knew you weren’t super keen on the whole thing so I got thinking about whether or not it really mattered to me and I don’t think it does. I think I could be just as happy with a kid that came from someone else. And,” he paused as if giving you time to prepare for what he was about to say, “I might have looked into our options for adopting or fostering.” “You did?” “Mmhmm. It’s kinda complicated so we shouldn’t rush into anything and we should probably contact some agencies to ask questions and stuff.” “How complicated are we talking?” “Well, basically, if we want to adopt I think we have to put our names down with an agency and then there’s an interview process and if they think we’re suitable candidates then they’ll put our names in the system and find us a kid. And I guess it depends on the age bracket you’re looking for. I think if we wanted a newborn we’d be more likely to get one through adoption but it might still take a while whereas older kids are a little easier to find, so that’s something we need to consider.” “What about fostering?” “It sounds even more complicated. Like adoption you put your name down and go through an evaluation process but then there’s a few different options. There’s short term fostering where we’d look after kids for a couple of weeks or months while plans for their futures are finalised. Then there’s long term fostering which is usually for kids who can’t go back home but don’t want to be adopted out of their birth families and they mostly stay with you until they’re adults. Emergency fostering is another option which is a few nights or weeks at most but it’s for kids who need to be moved quickly and you don’t always get a lot of warning about them coming to you. And like, there’s possibilities to end up adopting the kid or kids you foster depending on what they want and how it goes.” You puffed your cheeks up with air and slowly blew it out, head swimming with the sudden influx of information, “That does sound complicated.” “Yeah. We’ll really have to consider out options and decide what sort of family we want to have. I think reading about adoption and fostering made me want to do it more though. Cause like...” he paused as he tried to find the right words, “These kids are out there without good homes and I really believe we could give them that.” You noted Ben was getting a little misty eyed, blinking more rapidly to hold back the emotion, so you tried to make him laugh by nudging him and calling him a sap. But you loved seeing how much he cared.  It worked a little as he chuckled softly and shrugged, “Look, either way – adopting or fostering – it's probably not going to be easy. There’s challenges involved in fostering for sure – kids with trauma we won’t be able to understand, kids who are grieving the loss of their birth families or who’ve had bad experiences with other foster carers and who struggle to trust anyone. And the kids who are up for adoption might not have the same problems, especially if they’re younger but, I don’t know, I think finding out you were put up for adoption would leave its own scars. Issues with abandonment and things like that. So I think we have to be really, really sure before we put our names down anywhere. But I also think we could properly help someone doing it, maybe more than one someone. So, if you’re up for it then so am I.” “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” “What are you thinking?” More pros and cons lists?” You both

laughed at that but Ben grabbed your arm, encouraging you to leave your seat and sit on his lap instead. He wrapped his arms around your waist and tilted his head up for a kiss which you gladly gave.  “I’m really happy we’re talking about this,” He almost whispered, squeezing you a little tighter. “Me too. I guess we should start by going through all our options and seeing which ones would suit us best.” "I've got some websites bookmarked and a few documents downloaded so why don't I go get my laptop and you make us a drink and we'll start working through it, okay?" "Okay,"

#my writing #my blurbs #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy imagine #platonically event #catch me crying in the club #god this was such a good prompt tho #ily L

[queenxxxsupreme]

I was wondering if you could write something with a plus sized reader? It can be any of the witchers and/or Jaskier (although I think esk, lam, & jask would work best). Can be more focused on them finding the reader attractive/hot? I see lots of fics and headcannons abt plus size readers that are all about insecurities and finding the reader beautiful and aethestically pleasing. I'm plus size and I think I am beautiful, just not... attractive. looking hot and looking pretty/beautiful are different. idk if that makes sense I just want someone to think I'm hot. It can be NSFW or funny and fluffy. if you aren't comfortable writing this that's cool too. I just really like your writing. You have created a really welcoming community/page and I felt comfortable enough asking. I appreciate it so much. Thank you. 💜

A/N: I love this ask!!! Though I’m not sure I followed the prompt properly…. :( I wanted to do Lambert very badly which is part of the reason why it took so long to do but I couldn’t make it work with the prompt so I ended up doing Jaskier. I hope you liked it babe!

Warnings: no smut but Jaskier is a cheeky bastard and suggests NSFW 18+ things so if you aren’t into that please don’t read! also mentions of poor self image but Jaskier makes it better

***

You watched the tailor and seamstress murmur to each other in a language you didn’t understand. The seamstress said something, gesturing to the skirt you wore. Then she looked back at the tailor who shook his head disapprovingly. 

Their eyes seemed to drill holes into you. You suddenly felt so stupid for letting Jaskier talk you into coming to this expensive shop to be professionally fitted for a dress to match his outfit for the gala in two nights. 

But he was just so excited about the gala. It was the first time you’d be meeting the famed Geralt of Rivia as well as a few of Jaskier’s other friends he had met on his journeys with the witcher. 

You felt saddened that he was so eager to take you to the gala. Surely you'd only make him look like a fool in front of his friends and comrades. 

“Dear? Are you listening?” Jaskier placed his hand on the back of your calf as he moved around the stool you were balanced upon. 

You brought your eyes down to him. 

“Hm? Oh, erm, yes. Of course, I-I was.” 

He frowned. 

“No, you’ve got something else on your mind. What is it?”

You shook your head, smoothing out the material to your dress. 

“Nothing, Jask. It’s fine.”

“Tell me, please.” He reached up to take your hand in his, brushing his thumb along your knuckles. 

You kept your eyes on him for a few moments before looking in the direction of the seamstress and tailor. They no longer looked at you but they were still gesturing in your direction. 

“It’s just silly, Jaskier.” You shook your head. 

“You look upset, darling. It’s not silly if it’s upsetting you. Step down for a second, my sweet.” Jaskier held your hand as you stepped down from the stool. He tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear, looking at you with furrowed brows. “Please tell me. Did something happen?”

You shook your head, chewing on the inside of your cheek. 

“Can you understand what they’re saying?”

“Of course.” Jaskier nodded. “They’re talking about putting ruffles in your skirt. Alma thinks a few would be a good idea to add some at the bottom but Derion is completely against the very thought of ruffles.”

You could practically feel the weight lift off of your shoulders. You almost laughed. 

“Really?”

“I know. I don’t think ruffles are a good idea, but Alma is an incredibly talented seamstress. She has an eye for creating beauties. But sadly ruffles will not be happening today.” Jaskier waved the two over. “With all do respect to you, darling Alma, I think we should pass on the ruffles this time.”

“Bastard.” Alma swatted her hand in his direction. 

“Let’s move on from the skirt.” Derion waved his hand dismissively. “For the bust. It’s the most important part. It will take Alma hours to bead together intricate detailing to match your doublet, Master Julian. She needs to know how you’d like it done in order to begin working.” 

“Right.” Jaskier placed his hand on the small of your back. “I’m thinking a rather cheeky neckline. Perhaps an off the shoulder neckline that goes a little deeper than what’s traditionally seen.”

“Jaskier!” Your cheeks flushed as you looked at him. 

“Darling, it will be absolutely fantastic! Show a bit of your chest off! Show everyone how sexy you are.”

“Jaskier.”

“It appears as though you have yet to come to an agreement on a top.” Derion spoke, looking between you two. “When my lady decides on what style of top she’d like, please do let us know. Until then, Alma, let’s continue with the skirt while they chat.” 

You watched the two move towards the desk off to the side of the room. 

“Jaskier–,”

“Just picture this, my love.” Jaskier cut you off, his hand leaving your back as he moved to stand in front of you. “The corset is supporting your bust, holding the girls up and putting them on display–,”

“For the entire gala to see?” You widened your eyes. “What are you trying to do? Make your friends think I’m some strumpet?”

“No! No! Of course not! I think you’d look sexy like that.” Jaskier put his hand on your hip. “And the corset will accentuate your figure–,”

“The figure I don’t have.” You turned away from him, making your way towards the chairs that sat near the windows. You were thankful the curtains were drawn. This gave you some privacy from the outside world. 

“What? That’s ridiculous. You have a figure. A marvelous one at that.” Jaskier followed behind you. 

“I have the same figure as an apple, Jaskier. Or a pumkin. Round and-and large and just.... There’s nothing you should be so eager to show off at the gala.” You sat down in one of the seats, your voice quivering as you fought to keep your emotions at bay. 

Jaskier knelt down in front of you, his hands taking yours in his own. His touch, calloused from years of playing instruments, was warm as he gave you a squeeze. 

He didn’t know what to say at first. He was upset with himself for having not noticed that you were uncomfortable earlier. He was upset with himself for making you uncomfortable.

“Love-,”

“And don’t- Jaskier, please don’t try to tell me I’m not.” You whispered, unable to meet his gaze as tears blurred your vision. “I know I am. If you deny it, it’ll be like denying that the sky is blue or that-that grass is green.”

Jaskier nodded softly, understanding your words. He let the silence sit between you for a few more moments. He reached up to wipe your cheeks. Then he moved to sit in the seat next to you, keeping your hands in his.

“You know, my favorite shade of blue is just after the sun sets.” He murmured. “It’s dark and it’s ominous, but it’s stunning to see planets begin to show even though the sun hasn’t set yet. It’s like they’re beginning to come out of hiding. And my favorite shade of green is much more specific than that. Do you remember that time we laid in the lupin field just outside of Cintra all day?”

“Of course I remember that.” You sniffled, a little smile coming to your lips. “You read and sang to me all day. It was a beautiful day.”

“That day is my favorite shade of green.” Jaskier rubbed the back of your hand. He leaned in to kiss the corner of your eye. “And that night…. That night was when I realized my favorite shade of blue, you know?”

Your heart began to race a little quicker. That evening in the lupine field had been rather romantic and intimate. It was one of your favorite memories with the bard. 

Jaskier took a deep breath, looking across the room to the seamstress and tailor for a moment to make sure they were occupied with something else. 

“Dear heart, you know I would make sure the dress they create makes you look nothing short of the goddess you are.”

“I-I don’t…. I don’t have that same faith, Jaskier.” You shook your head, looking away from him to one of the paintings on the wall. It was of a beautiful woman in a stunning violet dress. She was thinner than you and the dress she wore made sure to show what curves she had off.

“You don’t have faith in me?” He asked softly.

“I don’t have faith in myself. You keep saying I’m going to look sexy and that you want to put me on display-,”

“Y/N, I was only joking. I’m so sorry if it made you uncomfortable. I meant absolutely no harm by it.” Jaskier put his hand on your knee. “I just- My gods, Y/N. The very idea of you in the dress I envision. Everyone is going to be fucking staring. On second thought, perhaps it wouldn’t be a good idea to put you in a dress similar to that. In the off chance that I’d be able to take my eyes off of you, I’d have to fight anyone who dared to look at you.”

He wore the biggest grin on his lips and you knew he meant well by it. He really did. But your stomach churned at the thought.

“They’ll be staring because I’ll look absolutely ridiculous.” You turned your head away from him. “Ladies like me weren’t made for galas and ballgowns.”

“I happen to think you are perfect for a ballgown, my dear.” He leaned over to kiss your ear. “I know you don’t see it, but you are absolutely sexy. Hell, if I had a say in it, you wouldn’t even be wearing a gown. But there are going to be other people there and I can’t have anyone else seeing your gorgeous body.” 

Your cheeks flushed.

“Can I offer you a little deal? A peace treaty?” Jaskier suggested. You looked at him, meeting his blue gaze. “They have a dress cut similar to the one I’d like to be made for you. Can you try it on for me before we make any decisions today?”

You nodded your head, letting out a little breath. You would at least try it on and let him see how ridiculous you’d look. If you proved him wrong now, maybe he’d listen to you in the future. 

“Will it fit me?”

“They can make it work for you so you can at least get an idea of the style.”

“Okay.”

“Excellent.” He gave you a kiss on the temple before going across the room to Alma and Derion. He spoke to them in the language you didn’t know. It was a beautiful language. As he said the words he had the ability to make it sound otherworldly. How could one man, a human no less, make words sound angelic? 

Derion and Alma left the room together. Jaskier clasped his hands behind his back, leaned forward to watch where they had disappeared. Alma returned moments later alone. In her hands she held a dress. 

The dress was dark green but that was all you could tell.

“I’ll give you a moment to get dressed. Take good care of her, Alma.”

“I will. You worry about yourself, Master Julian.” Alma waved him away. 

You wanted to object, to say that you could get dressed by yourself, but you knew very well you wouldn’t be able to. You didn’t want to rip the dress. The material was probably more expensive than you could afford. 

“Take off your dress, darling.” Alma placed the dress over a nearby chair. “I’ll grab pins so that we can pin the dress in place.”

“Pin?” You repeated. “In place?”

“Yes, darling. It wasn’t made for your body. We need to make the dress work for your figure so we do that by manipulating the fabric with pins. Don’t worry, you won’t feel a thing.”

***

Alma called for Jaskier after the dress was situated properly on you. 

You nervously moved back and forth as you shifted your weight from one foot to the other to get a better look in the mirror. 

The dress fit you decently. It was loose fitting in the chest but Alma fixed that with pins. She pinned a few other spots too but they were in the back so you couldn’t see all that well. 

The material was a beautiful emerald green silk with darker green embroidery around the bust. The off the shoulder neckline wasn’t terribly low in the middle where it dipped down, but it was lower cut than what you would usually wear. 

“Now remember, darling. The corset will be tighter on you and be providing support.” Alma spoke as she moved around the stool you were resting on. 

“My gods, Y/N! I love it!” Jaskier clapped his hands together. “Just wait until we get it in the blue to match my doublet!”

“Alma!” Derion called for Alma. 

Alma excused herself, leaving you alone with Jaskier. 

He moved around the stool, admiring the dress on you. 

“Before I lose myself in my own thoughts, love, what do you think?” Jasier clasped his hands together and held them near his mouth. 

You looked back to the mirror, shifting a little. 

“I don’t…. hate it as much as I thought I would.” You admitted. 

“But do you like it? Are you comfortable with the style? Be completely honest with my, darling. If you aren’t, there is no worry at all! I’ll have them make a style you are comfortable in. I want you to be comfortable first. No matter what you wear you will be absolutely gorgeous and breathtaking and I will be ripping the dress off of you come the end of the night.”

“Jaskier.” You scolded. He gave you a cheeky smile. “I do like the cut and I like the off the shoulder part, but perhaps if we could add sleeves to it?”

“Of course! Oh that would be stunning! I’ll let Alma and Derion know. Anything else you want to add or take away?”

“I don’t think so.” You looked back to the mirror. “I think I’ll like it more once it’s in the blue. I do like the green, but the blue will match your doublet for the gala. And the green makes me sort of feel like a melon.”

Jaskier frowned.

“I wish you’d stop comparing yourself to fruits.” 

“Would you rather a toad? ‘Cause I look like one of those in this dark green too. A rather large toad.”

“If you are a toad, then what would that make me?” He held his hand out for you so he could assist you in stepping down from the stool.

“My pretty princess.” You giggled. 

“Hmm. Well you are the sexiest toad I have ever seen.” He pulled you into his arms. “But I rather like calling you a fruit. You taste just like one-,”

“Jaskier!”

Taglist: @pressedinthepages @mishafaye @whitewolfandthefox @wolfyland07 @belalugosisdead @persephonehemingway @keira-hulmaster @dinonuggs69 @greatestauthorofmygeneration @shadow-hunters-lover @dancingwith-thesunflowers @tedi-fach-las @thecomfortofoldstorries @natkowaa @disasteren @weathervanes-my-oneandlonely @onlyhenrys @wackylurker @criminaly-supernatural @magpie343 @permanently-exhausted-witcher @genderfluid-ho @the-space-between-heartbeats @havenoffandoms @carriebee1 @ger-bearofrivia @naominami @writingawaymylife @reaganjenelle @theawkwardpedestrian @scarlettwitcher @badassspaceprincess @just-a-sad-donut @summersong69 @an--actual--human--disaster @rubyqueen819 @omgkatinka @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @vonxcon @mazakeen @bravelittlesunflower @thereagles @awkward-turtles-world @menalliha @cotton_mo @maan24 @thefirelordm @monkeymo @krenee1drful @nympha-door-a @unadulteratedtreecrusade @Aquarius-pisces-rose @mentallyscreamingsincebirth @fl0ating @sometimesiwrite @you-fxcking-wish-bish @thanks-bruh-for-nothing @maan2442 @thegaydeath @creatingstuffinpeace @wellthisstinks @andyrazzledazzle @ameliasmistake @winterwolf @caraqas @bluscryn @thefirelordm @y-napotat @henrycavillbesty @ta-ka-shi-ma @sulkyshengshou @spaced-out-state @thecollection @mayday1284 @babietrain @wandering-poetess @redneckstrash

If your name is in italics, it wouldn’t let me tag you :(

[icharchivist]

Omg icha your tags on that OBM post have me crying. I saw screenshots of that devilgram but i cant for the life of me remember what card it's from

I love Mammon so fucking much because of it, like Lucifer is over here doubting himself, regretting everything he did in the fall and believing he was in the wrong.

Then Mammon gives him motivation to keep fighting on, saying he'll follow Luci no matter what and it made me super emotional. And when you remember how Luci trusts Mammon the most out of the others it just means so much more to me, and thats there's so much more to their bond than Mammon being a troublemaker that Lucifer has to discipline.

DLKJFD HEY! it's a pleasure to suffer with you then, tho sorry for the random crying!

i found them on a post that analysed Mammon's character as the protector of his brothers and it's been living in my mind rentfree tbh! it's likely we saw the same post but since i saved the link, here's the link, and with the name of the cards those devilgrams are from, it should be those two Memory cards

(which makes me realize i have one of the two so now i know what Devilgram i'll read next-)

BUT YEAH i so much agree with everything you say!!

................

So huh i got. Carried away.

tbh i am fascinated with Post-Fall Character analysis on the brothers because man, having to go from angels to demons, with the trauma they were caring, the grief, the way their sins became bigger parts of themselves (like for exemple the way Beel's hunger developed and all - many thoughts trying not to go on tangent here), reconciling who they were with who they are becoming ... they had so much to adjust from.

and Lucifer in particular has to carry a lot about how this specific burden manifests, as one of the Favorite in Heaven, as his brothers's keepers, with the secret he has about Lilith ect... And i think esp post-fall there is an aspect of Lucifer that has to face that his anger was so violent, so powerful, he is now forced to face it as now a New Person in the family that he has to look at everyday. (i think he quickly got to see Satan as a brother and not an extension of himself don't get me wrong, but i think especially after the fall, this was the literal embodiment of his feelings and anger. Lucifer is someone who's at least prideful enough to try to stay in control of himself, and right after the fall, while he was still suffering from what the Fall implied, he couldn't forget how his anger manifested because this anger now has a life of his own).

I feel like Post-Fall Lucifer's feelings were all over the place, while also with the major pressure that he had to step up, take care of his brothers, of the impact of his rebellion, of knowing that since he had a bigger status than any of his brothers, Michael, Raphael, even perhaps Simeon, were all people who were much more on his mind regarding how he failed them, than it was for his others brothers. And the responsibility of now working for Diavolo, as well as the relief turned burden, of what happened to Lilith and the fact everyone's grief, that he had to manage with Mammon, all relied on the fact Lucifer couldn't tell them the truth. Like, all of the brothers had a lot to take in but the specific additions Lucifer had to take into account were A Lot.

And those Devilgrams especially, and those moments that shine through that shows how much Lucifer actually trusts Mammon, really showcase, to me, that the reason Lucifer is as stable as he managed to be is because Mammon is the one who stepped up and did everything to adjust for everyone.

And ofc there's also the idea of, if now they represent sins, they must have represented the opposite virtues as Angel, and the opposite of Greed being Charity has Mammon especially stepping out still also a part of his own sense of self. (re this post, yes maybe i really like the metas in here)

And tbh i would love to have more specific ideas about the way Mammon immediately reacted upon the trauma considering he immediately set himself as the caretaker, which, i think is in itself an extension of how he would show Charity. And i wonder if that's where his general gambling and stuff came from: having to fill the dread with the excitement of the moment, that living in the present was the best way to not let the past get to him, and as a result this can be how he can focus too into juggling between his brothers's traumas as well. (that and also the idea of rejecting his angelic side and all of that)

And the fact that back in Heaven Mammon was already someone Lucifer trusted a lot, i think all of this keeps adding up to cement Mammon in Lucifer's mind as the most reliable of them all because he has seen that Mammon's true nature is his ability to take care of those he treasures. He has seen Mammon in crisis that Lucifer himself couldn't handle, and saw how Mammon managed to push through and be the one to keep everything working.

And it's why he trusted Mammon with MC to start with imo, the fact he knows that despite everything "scummy" Mammon does, the scummy parts are mostly momentary, depending on whatever impulsive thing Mammon will indulge in at the moment. But that on the long run, Mammon is the one who can keep a clear head and be more sensible about the situation, who can keep a keen eye to see if someone isn't feeling well, and who knows how to handle it in case.

idk i have so many emotions about it so this text messages makes me very emotional because like... nowadays it's not like the brothers have to protect themselves from something big, and the brothers tend to be very self-reliant, so Mammon doesn't have to take care of them. And in a lot of occasions, they tend to not really back each other up, probably a mix of well "it's not that serious" and/or "well they had it coming" in some way.

but that in that text convos, basically, Mammon saw Belphie fuck up and probably just saw there his brother, more vulnerable, probably kicked in his protective instincts. And to see Mammon get protective like this, which surprised everyone except Lucifer?? i think it's likely the younger brothers don't really understand of the length Mammon went to to take care of them back then, while Lucifer is keenly aware of it. Probably also because the others brothers had to wrestle with their grief and sadness while Lucifer also had to deal with the responsibilities that came with all of this and so more than healing, Mammon helped him get himself back together so he could protect everyone else, making him even more aware of how precious Mammon's help was.

okay i kind of got lost in my point but i'm reaLLY emotional about post-fall things and the whole idea of Lucifer seeing Mammon as the most reliable of his brothers. And while the game mostly focus on the petty, silly brothers dynamics, the moments it reminds us of those serious moments really get to me

also, you know me, i'm an overthinking bastard, i'll take the crumbs i get and build a castle with them so behold the Mammon loving hours i guess????

Glad to be able to share those emotions with you 🥺

#ichareply #ichafantalks obm #ichatalks about obm #xkilluas #i play a little too much of it lately so my mind is really full and i'm just dLFJDLFK #sorry for the word ramble but. mind full #but i'm so glad to be able to share it with you!! glad you liked my tags then and hope you don't mind this mess

[energyanon]

I feel like it's the cool thing to do, you know to make fun of him right now and I just don't feel like it. I feel sad for him because though I obviously don't know what's going on bts I can't help but feel he isn't doing too good. The way he was behaving at the restaurant with Leah was just too much and felt like him playing the role of happy go lucky guy...

Also, in one of your readings you mentioned that the people behind him were kinda cold, not all but some and that's just sad so I'll keep my thoughts positive and hope he finds true happiness soon, whatever that may look like.

Here’s the thing: Henry can do better.

Bar none, he can do better. He’s choosing not to do any form of healing or internal work. He’s choosing to make silly decisions. He is 38, at some point he needs to stop being babied and held accountable, and that is where this started. Fans expected better, he failed to meet that, and the reaction was jarring to people. When you used to love something and the rose coloured glasses are taken off, it’s jarring, you’re going to be emotional about it. You’re going to be nasty, that’s how it works. You feel angry and embarassed at yourself for giving so much time to something that turned out to be false, and you need them to feel what you felt. Classic projection. I’m actually angry at ME for feeling, so im going to be angry at YOU for making me feel that way. I don’t think anyone think that it’s become “cool” per say to make fun of him, I believe that we’re community based creatures, and we’ll always go where the group goes. It’s not “cool” it’s just where everyone is at the moment. And to not follow the group is to be shunned. A couple of weeks ago I was on the tag, and there were anons hassling long time henry fans saying “are you leaving the fandom i cant believe you still like him blah blah”, and those people had to say either they’re taking a break cause they can’t handle it, or they agree and they’re leaving. And all of this is over NV of all people. But that's the thing is we see all these things that people aren't doing, comparing them to ourselves saying "I would never" but you also were raised in an entirely different environment and family. HC seems to believe that being silent is the best way to go, probably because he was raised that way. He made one call out post and got the reaction he got: guess what he’s now learnt to never do that again. What’s he going to reform back to now? Being silent. I don’t feel that the people around HC are a good influence. I do feel that that isn’t helping his mindset, and he is being dragged down by said people, but he’s also not taking responsibility to change that. A member of his FAMILY is apart of his work and personal life, and he apparently made a production company with charlie. That’s all kinds of triangulation that I dont even want to get started on, and there’s two reasons to get involved with family and thats either 1. You want to help THEM, or 2. they’re in your ear convincing you. It is never a good idea to mix family with work, ever. He doesn’t make good decisions, but I do feel that that’s also because he trusts the people in his ear too much, and they have become like a family to him. That’s hard to let go of. Its really difficult. I don’t know anyone who has an easy time breaking it off with a long time friend or family member, I know i’ve found it near impossible. But I think he’s very heavily influenced by these close connections because he doesn’t want to lose them. I understand that getting involved in the drama is fun, and I’ve been there for sure up until even two ays ago i was still there, but now that I understand that what he’s going through is also tough, i’ve also realised that I need to have more empathy for the guy outside of readings too. It’s not nice to be in the place that he is. Ive been there I get what kind of person it turns you into. And it’s a huge turning point in your life aswell, you either let it consume you or you do your best to break free. He’s at a crossroads, i’ve said it before. Lets hope he goes down the path that’s best for him. All in all, I think people have a right to be upset, they’ve invested alot of time into the guy and got nothing back. I also think with that post yesterday that he’s actually trying his best. I don’t think its easy for him to self reflect, he’s not going to apologise for NV, she is his companion for now, he’s got some serious issues surrounding being loved/lonely, he’s not going to do anything to make her leave until he’s ok with finding someone else, which i feel like he’s kind of given up on at the moment? But he’s also still trying to juggle all these things in his life and his own mental health and the constant judgement doesn’t make that better. When people are loved and supported they’re the best version of themselves, right now he’s not being loved or supported. In fact he’s being hated by thousands of people, that’s going to take a toll on you. But to me, idk what it is, but it feels like he’s trying to mend things to be the best of his ability. (And his ability is still pretty poor in execution, and to be fair him talking about fucking protien shakes is more boring than paint drying and he should absolutely be dragged for that 😆 ) But it feels like a positive move. The level that the dragging is being taken is starting to turn into something else, but this is also how people express themselves. You can be apart of it or not, the pages that allow it are a good venting system, and fans deserve to have that, but there aren’t many places for it to also just be understanding, so that’s what this page will be instead. (But once again, understanding isn’t creating excuses, and I won’t create excuses for him. He is still held accountable, but without the drag) Even with this all being said, he still needs to do better. I stand by that, and I think that’s what most of the fans are trying to say (they’re just a little big angrier than i am about it, and that’s ok) Anyway I’m doing part 2 today so we’ll see how it goes with Fans/the post etc

[with-the-same-tattoos]

Bells + eyebags for the asks?

bells: what sounds are your favorite or calm you the most?

I am a BIG, big BIG fan of sound, I have a lot of faves for different reasons, here is a whole list :)

All the noises my current / now passed dogs have made. My baby Keto is very vocal and whiny and he woofs in his sleep and it just. Always manages to make me smile so wide. His litte murfs when he's throwing a tantrum r very good. Casanova, one of the dogs I used to have, was a beagle, but like a really big one, and had a really weirdly deep woofy bark otherwise standard for beagles. I'm for ever sad that I don't have it on film bc no other beagle woofing will ever replicate that no matter how many stupid beagle barking videos i look up bc i have a sappy brain and idk i just. I love very intensly. I also rly like the huffs of horses!!!!! When u kiss them on the snout and theyr like :) sniffff huf it's so precious.

Rain & the ocean !!!! Any sound of water is just immersive to me. It catches me off guard. It just. I don't know how to explain it but water is so otherworldly to me.

Factory noises. I grew up next to a factory & playing the silent hill games, so that kinda humming & metallic soundscape is very comforting to me. It feels like home. I live in the countryside nowdays (well i have an apt in the town i go to school at but I still call my parents home Home bc yk ; w ; im kinda like that) and it's been incredibly good for my mental health but i miss factory noises... i rly like to sometimes just listen to my computers hum etc. V calming

Kinda similiarly car noises, some of my favourite memories r just from sitting in a car while someone else is driving, maybe talking, maybe not.

Storks !!!!!!! Means summer and spring and happiness!!

PETER LUKASES VOICE ON THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES CHILLS ME TF OUT

VERY rambly my apologies but I really like listening to things it's exiting ; v ;

eyebags: what do you think makes a person attractive?

I REALLY don't know a proper answer for this. Its a bit all over. I think, most important to me is a connection. At a glance i kind of fall into the trap of "i can fix them" kinda situations but also... really not? It's more that I'm attracted to the idea of not struggling alone, being understood, understanding someone else, finding a form of mutual nurturing and helping eachother stand up. I apprechiate someone who understand why I get so emotional about silly things like the sky n shit, and I want to get someone, I want to get their things and even if I don't, I wanna support them and make them know they're loved. Struggles are usually the easiest way for me to CONNECT w someone, but sometimes I just click over stupid stuff and go head over heels for literally anyone. I like all kinds of personalities and vibes and energies, it just depends on a random click.

Appearences wise idk I kinda just like Messy people. Furiosa types. Dunno why.

#DUNNO IF IM EXPLAINING THIS SENSIBLY #ask #thank u for asking !!!! :) #oooo im exyta rambly todau

[kinetic-elaboration]

September 10: Friday

I just had this feeling this morning like I didn’t want to go to work and eh... that was probably right. Nothing really bad happened, I just felt very strongly that I did NOT want to be there.

My coworker wanted to talk to me at like 8:30 in the morning (you know those silly little ‘don’t talk to me before I’ve had my coffee’ signs?? literally do not talk to me before 9:30 EARLIEST) and I was supremely incoherent. Then later a different coworker essentially took out his bad mood on my department including on me personally, and it was... dumb. I got his point but I’m just, as I tried to explain to others later, unkeen on being talked to about actions I took under others’ explicit instructions. Also, in part because of that, in part because I thought he was semi-unreasonable, and in part because I just truly didn’t want to do what he was asking/telling me to do, I did not really budge on the issue. Which was very awkward because as I said I did get his point. And of course the issue is SOMETHING DUMB which is always how it is. All of these fights are 100% shit that would sound idiotic if you tried to explain it to someone else, which is why I’m vaguing right now.

And the nametags thing came up on Teams (thanks @ the same coworker), and the only good thing about that is that the director explicitly said she was against the idea so I feel pretty confident that it won’t be mandated. Also I could detect some panic in other people about it. I do NOT like the way this is being handled AT ALL. Plus it’s just the hill I’ve decided to die on (because I think I can win--so I guess it’s better to say this is the hill I’m going to defeat my enemies on) so I gotta get annoyed at it. I refrained from contributing to the conversation but I did like the director’s anti-nametag post, which I think gets my point across.

Also I felt like I spent a lot of time doing not much, to be honest. Still didn’t go to stupid compact shelving. Devoted too much time to the crap in the above paragraphs. Talked to BL over in admin and heard some more unflattering stories about a particular administrator. Like, incredibly unflattering. Which is stuff I do want to know but it contributes to the overall Mood of the day, which again is ‘I don’t want to be here.’

I took a very late lunch, and that in turn contributed to me not paying enough attention to the time and leaving late.OH AND I got 3 important emails in the last ten minutes of the day. Two were very expected because they were coming from the West Coast but the last was like.. do not make me deal with this right now.

I didn’t deal with almost any of it but I did get so distracted that I left about five minutes late, and so I missed the bus. I wasn’t too upset about it since the weather was nice anyway and I didn’t mind spending some time downtown. But I did waste time trying to see if I could catch said bus, and then more time trying to go to my favorite coffee shop, which had closed at 5. But since it was 5:15, there were still people inside (cleaning up, which is fair) and people outside (drinking coffees they’d bought before 5 I’m sure, also fair), and the sign said hours were until 7 so I spent a few confused, embarrassing moments going ????? what is the truth?

So ultimately I went to a different cafe, a newish one that opened in 2019 I think. I’ve always avoided it in part because the floor is very loud and in part because I felt like I was cheating on my main place lol. (Not that I never get coffee anywhere else... just that this place is so close to my usual place, I always feel like, if I’m in the area, I might as well go to said usual place.) I did find the inside very disorienting. The pattern of the floor is just truly A Lot. They did have these weird teacup ornaments hanging from the ceiling though. I got an iced latte, which was fine, and this delicious spinach and feta pastry. I feel like I should stop by more often for baked goods. I settled outside with what I’d gotten, mostly because of the floor, partly because it actually was nice out, and partly because I’m not currently comfortable with indoor dining, even in places with almost no one in them.

I only had like 25 minutes to kill at that point, but it was nice. I had a notebook with me and I did a teeny bit of planning on the Southern Gothic AU (still behind on this!!). Mostly I listened to the conversation next to me. I couldn’t entirely help it; the girl’s voice was carrying. She was talking to her guy friend about some recent issues they’d been having in their friendship. I was honestly...kind of impressed with them? I could mostly hear her--he was talking too but his voice didn’t carry as much--but it just overall sounded like a really open, emotionally honest, generally calm talk. Like certainly there were strong emotions in play (not exactly going to judge whether they were “warranted” given the apparent facts of the dispute, since I just ranted about a disagreement over something so dumb I don’t even want to name it in public) but they were just... expressing feelings that were difficult, and expressing displeasure with others’ actions, without yelling or being passive aggressive, etc. I mean even that they’d picked this time and place to meet specifically to discuss it I thought was commendable. And they were definitely friends, not bf/gf, because the disagreement involved his girlfriend (once referred to as his “partner”...sorry lol I judged that a LITTLE since they looked like they were maybe 21 years old--partner in WHAT??). The girl mentioned her therapist, which put a lot of her tone and vocabulary into perspective. Not necessarily in a bad way, I mean, it seemed to be working? But as someone who has never been to therapy, but is self-taught, so to speak, in gauging and describing my own feelings, I could... discern a sort of purposeful vocabulary that almost sounded scripted. I wrote down some specific quotes but I don’t want to put them in a public place. I’ll draw my respecting-strangers’-privacy line in the sand there. But a lot of, like “when you do x, it makes me feel y” kind of controlled explanations.

Anyway, I got very invested in that. Partly for future writing purposes, partly out of curiosity and partly because... I don’t know that I could have that kind of conversation NOW and I’m fairly sure I could not have when I was in college. I mean.... I don’t know... I’ve blocked out a lot of the pretentious/serious/about-our-feelings talks I did have. And what sticks out now are all the times I didn’t do that--all of the many, many issues with TA38... Even the way B and I have literally NEVER acknowledged the handful of times we hooked up in 2009.

You’re never gonna sound COOL talking about your emotions, your wants and your needs; it’s always gonna sound, imo, like a Therapy Script. And I don’t even always think you gotta have those talks. After graduation, R and I literally had this exchange where we said ‘well we both made mistakes last year, and we could try to untangle it now, but it’s just gonna bring up a lot of bad feelings. It’s done now anyway. Blanket apologies given, blanket acceptance of apologies, let’s move on.” And we did and it was fine. But if we’d had better conversations while we were living together, that would have been a different situation.

All of which is of course complicated for me personally because I am extremely conflict-averse. EXTREMELY.

Anyway, I ran into BL at the bus stop and we talked a bit there and on the bus, which was fine but kinda exhausting tbqh especially because of the topic of conversation. I got home at 6:30 and must have crawled immediately into bed and gone to sleep, but I barely remember it at all. Woke up at 10:30 and had no idea what time it was or what day it was or what I was doing.

Had dinner and then somehow went down a rabbit hole that started... somewhere?? and ended with me looking up my childhood home on Google Earth, which you KNOW is the sign of a mentally stable person who is doing just fine okay.

Now it’s the absolutely disgusting hour of 2:30 in the morning... Idk I wanted to go out tomorrow and take advantage of the nice weather but we’ll see how that goes. The thing is I feel like I need a full day to sleep but I only have two (2) days and in that time I gotta do laundry, cook for the week, preferably write one (1) whole chapter of this fic, and possibly also go on the aforementioned excursion. Which is a lot for me. It doesn’t really... fit.

Everything’s just so much all the time and so on.

#the year 2021 #2021: rl #real dear diary moment here

[chimswae]

BTS Caretaker CH28

Summary: She may think she has Bangtan Sonyeondan wrapped around her fingers. She may think it is easy to love the members equally without hurting any soul. She may think the boys wont fall head over heels for her. She assumes it is okay to show a little love and affection towards the boys, what if she gets it all wrong? What if it only brings more complication to her already complicated life? Can she survive their charms? Will she be able to resist them? What if they just wont let her go?

- Pairing: BTS x Oc ( Yoongi x OC, Jungkook x OC)

- Genre: Fluff, Slight Angst, Romance, Idol!au

- Word Count: 5,170

- Author Note: A little revelation of their relationship and Seul past. And idk why i wrote this way, but yeah it is what it is lol :< 

Previous | Next

Chapter 28

Taehyung’s outburst earlier this week lasted for few days until Namjoon had enough of it. That night before the Home Festa, he gathered everyone in the practice room to have a real talk. Yoongi and Taehyung had practically ignored each other existence since the incident. None of them showed any interest to make up after the small fight that they had.

Unlike, Jimin and Jungkook, they didn’t prolong the fight with Taehyung since they respected his view and worries. Even though his behaviour towards Seul was unacceptable. Taehyung was looking out for the members. They understood him though they were weirded out by his sudden change. Apart from Jin and Hoseok, Taehyung is the friendliest one among them and to witness him spouting mean things to Seul was a little out of character.

Namjoon pulled himself upright and faced everyone with a deep sigh. Everyone was in dazed, too preoccupied with their own thought. Everything must be resolved tonight or else Armys might notice the tension in the air.

Hesitated, the leader cleared his throat and broke the eerie silence between them “Can we talk about what happen that night? We have been keeping it low until.. I had enough. Both of you, care to explain what happen back then? Tae, why are you venting your anger on Seul? We could talk it out instead of yelling at the poor girl..” every nerve in his tense body screamed for relief, he finally said it out.

They heard Yoongi scoffed maintaining his hard gaze on the floor. He never agreed on how Taehyung vented his anger without solid reason on Seul as if her feelings didn’t matter in this. If he were to find someone to blame, Yoongi is ready to hear anything came from Taehyung. Her tears pained him.

Others remained silent, some were shifting uncomfortable in their seats wanting to escape from this room. The youngest one looked miserable realizing this useless fight started because of him and Jimin. They were partially at fault too. Another thing was that, he couldn’t reach Seul for few days now. She ignored every text and call that he made.  

Apart from the silent treatment, Seul tended her job as if nothing happens however she avoided meeting any of them. It simply means, she had rescheduled her work back to her normal work hours. There was no more breakfast for them early in the morning. Seul had stopped coming after her night shift. They didn’t blame her for that, anyone would be acting that way after all. She felt responsible and guilty over everything even though she did nothing but to look after the boys only to get yelled without consulting her. This was another level of absurdity.

Annoyed, Jin snapped “Kim Taehyung, answer him. What the hell is wrong with you?” the younger guy took a deep breath looking like a lost lamb.

“I don’t like the idea of our members falling for the same girl. It is too disturbing even though they agreed to play it fair, with Yoongi hyung in the picture. Don’t you think this is getting serious than before?” his face contorted in confusion and anger.

Jungkook and Jimin exchanged a serious look before keeping their gaze fixated on Yoongi “Yoongi hyung likes Seul?” Jimin murmured in tones of disbelief. They were trying to reconfirm the older guy’s unspeakable affection towards Seul back then. It finally cleared all the doubts in them.

Yoongi likes Seul.

“I am not surprised” said Hoseok, sighing softly.

Jungkook looked at Yoongi again with a disbelief look “Is it true?”  he questioned slowly. Yoongi drew a sharp breath, gathering his guts to meet the maknae’s eager eyes “I am sorry Guk. I thought it can be stopped. Fuck… it is complicated” he combed his hand through his hair expelling his worries.

“O…kay…” he slouched in his seat, relieved and disappointed. Disappointed that he didn’t realize it sooner, until Taehyung needed to outline it out for him. If he could talk this thing with Yoongi, they could come up with something without endangering the whole group.

Or.. he could stop himself from liking Seul.

His feelings only complicate things.

“I thought you like Seul too Tae?” Namjoon inquired drawing everyone’s attention to the star of the night. Taehyung’s looked pale digesting the leader bias question who seemed to be attacking him. He went on, “I remember you talked about a lady from the photo that you captured. You printed it out and framed the photo. Don’t you like her too?” Yoongi snapped his head sending wary glance at his way.

Taehyung stammered “I…I don’t-That was a small crush that I have for her until I learned about Jungkook and Jimin feelings for Seul. Things will get complicated if I make a move on her” he expelled a long sigh.

“You are denying your feelings for her, so you come up with those nonsense that you said to her that night, just to ease yourself?” Yoongi snarled lowly keeping his gaze on the flustered guy.

His eyes twitched in frustration “ I am stating the fact. For now, it is all rainbows and sunshine, you are in love. What if one day she has to make a choice? What are you going to do about that huh? Are you really okay with her choosing one of you over another? Her action will divide us and set us against each other. What happen to the promises that we made back then? We never let ridiculous things like this affect our work and friendship… Yoongi..hyung..we have never gotten into any serious fight since we first debuted. I thought our relationship is making a progress” tears were in his eyes, but he tried to look brave.

To be reminded by all the memories that they shared together, there was no doubt Taehyung made a point there. Yoongi and Taehyung were not the bestest friend in the group, nowadays they had resolved those issues and became closer than ever. Fans showed their love towards the couple and they even came up with a couple name for them, Taegi.

The silly Taegi.

The loveable Taegi.

The blooming love between Taegi.

Taegi was the beginning of a new relationship. It was magical.

Yoongi’s fist curled up into a ball, he felt his body tense digesting every word came from Taehyung without leaving any behind. It came to his realization; Taehyung ultimate fear was to see everyone turning their back against each other.

Namjoon leaned his back against the mirror, watching the two adults mending their almost broken friendship. Everyone seemed intrigued to see the things unfold in front of them. This was the perfect time to vent out everything.

Yoongi forced the words out from his mouth “I am sorry Tae.. I am not aware of your worries, but I choose to be ignorant instead. That’s very inconsiderate of me to do that. About my feelings for Seul, I- that was a mistake. I know Jimin and Jungkook have made it clear about their feelings.. I am sorry for that…for liking her” he glanced at both of them with an apologetic look.

“It is just…Her tears pained me. When you made Seul cries, I couldn’t stop myself from thrashing you. I should not have let my feelings cloud my judgement. I am so fucked up” he continued, followed by a low grunt.

They fell into silence. The rest of the members looked at one another, amazed. This thing with Yoongi had never been this serious. Occasionally, Yoongi would tell them what he felt but just enough to leave them in vain. Yoongi is not the type of person whom expressed his feelings openly especially with the members.

This was by far the deepest things that he ever shared with them.

It rendered them breathless.

“We can’t make you hate her hyung. It is your feelings” Taehyung paused few seconds before he took the courage to say it aloud “I am concerned of our future. We have come this far, and this relationship issue bound to happen anyways. I didn’t expect it would end up this way, with half of the members in the group liking the same girl. The thought of losing all of you over this.. it petrified me” Taehyung blinked his tears away, rubbing his sore eyes in hope to hide it from others.

Jimin slid his arm around his best friend shoulder “Tae..I am sorry to make you worry of such thing. I know you are worried of us.. I am sorry for falling in love carelessly. That is not my intention to hurt the group, Seul and you in process” Jungkook fiddled with his fingers, looking a little shaky.

Smiling weakly, he squished Jimin’s hand meeting his deep gaze “It is not your fault, I am overreacting. I keep it to myself…instead of letting it out” Jungkook on the other hand feeling overwhelmed by the whole thing. He did not know how to react to everything that his hyungs had said and up until now, he sucked in showing his emotion.

“Jung are you alright?” Jin touched his back, scrutinizing his solemn expression.

As soon as all eyes on him, he burst into tears panicking everyone in the room. The sobs were stifled at first as he attempted to hide his grief, then overcome by the wave of his emotions and he ended up crying for real. “Kookie… Jungkook why are you crying?” Jimin went to his side, pulling the younger boy into a tight embrace.

Taehyung and Yoongi’s faces loses colour knowing this talk happened tonight was due to their absurd feud. If it weren’t for the incident that night, they would not have this talk and the maknae wouldn’t be crying. Jungkook clutched onto Jimin’s back, burying face in his shoulder “Okay calm down, take your time...” Jin eyes shot open, looking alarmed in his seat.

It took Jungkook a while to stop crying completely, and each of the members were already on their feet pacing back and forth in the cold room. Did Jungkook finally have enough of this drama and pressure around him? Jungkook wouldn’t shed his tears easily unless it was their concert.  When Jimin first caught Jungkook cried his heart out in their dorm a year ago, the older guy thought he was fooling around. He made fun of him until he realized Jungkook was crying for real. To his utter astonishment, the tears were genuine, and he found out Jungkook was missing his family.

Aged 14, Jungkook left his home to chase his dreams. This young man had to live in a hard way, ditching his teenage life to be part of Bangtan Sonyeondan. The members had raised him together. From an introvert and shy boy, Jungkook grew as a fine man with good manners.

He was indeed a golden maknae to them.

The members cherished the youngest member with all their heart.

“Hyungs, this is all because of me. I thought if I make friend with someone which is not in our circle will make me feel more human. I never thought of our career as a joke, in fact I love to be here, I love everyone, I love us… But for some reason I feel empty. Despite everything that I have all these years, it is never enough for me. I am craving for something, something that makes me feel real. Not BTS Jungkook but the real Jeon Jungkook. Until I meet Seul. It is all started with a mere admiration. I’m curious of her life. She looks happy and free. At first, Seul is my muse. I admired her from afar. I got greedy and decided to make a move on her, we became friends. I let myself fell into her deeper, I let her into my heart” he confessed.

Namjoon shoved his phone in his pocket taking the maknae’s words seriously. Jungkook continued not long after “I understand if you feel I am such a disappointment to the group. I.. got distracted by the unpromising future that I may have with Seul. I shouldn’t have done that, I am sorry…hyung.. ” he whispered, hanging his head low.

“Shut that mouth of yours. You called yourself a disappointment again, I will chop your tongue” Yoongi crossed his arms, glaring furiously. He hated it when one of the members downgrading themselves. They were not supposed to feel that way. It was wrong.

Jin gritted his teeth together mouthing Yoongi to be nice but only to be ignored by the grumpy guy. Why is he like this? Jin screamed mentally, annoyed by Yoongi demeanour.

“You are not a disappointment to your group Jungkook” a familiar voice rose from the other side of the room garnered the boys’ attention. They blinked in confusion as they realized the owner of the voice stood frozen at the entrance with a deep frown evident on her forehead.

“Seul..?” Jungkook flinched at the sight in front of him.

Namjoon walked up to Seul, taking her hand in his, leading the way to the centre of the room “I told her to come. We can’t solve this without her. Taehyung owed her an apology after all. For calling her a bitch” he stressed the last word sternly, causing the younger guy shifted uncomfortably.

“I know all of you have been playing this blame games and probably tired, to hear this thing again. If you want to find someone to blame, then it is me. I am nobody in your life. Your friendship is precious, don’t let me taint it. I come into your life and cause misunderstanding. If I didn’t lead any of you on, this wouldn’t happen. I am sorry” Seul scanned their faces one by one and as her gaze landed on Taehyung, he tore his eyes from meeting hers.

Taehyung felt utterly disappointed of himself, for hurting Seul without thinking straight.

Seul exhaled deeply as she took the cue to continue “I enjoyed your company, each one of you. I have never been so happy in life until I met you guys. Thank you for that. Your music gives me strength. I.. don’t want to ruin your friendship. I don’t want to be in the middle of this mess. Let’s get back to square one. Pretend like we never know each other. Pretend that your caretaker is my mother. It will give you time to forget me. I believe you will get over the fact that I used to be your caretaker” her lower lips quivered, holding back the tears in her eyes.

Jimin shook his head “Seul-ah..I don’t-“ Seul spoke before he could finish. “Don’t worry, I will still work as your caretaker until my mom gets better. I will not neglect my duties. I will still cook for you” her voice broke in the end letting her emotion took over her mind.

“Just…we should..stop meeting each other like this” she closed her eyes as her tears rolled down hitting the ground.

Yoongi let out a disapproval groan “Are you suggesting us to forget you? To act as if you have never existed? Aren’t you being selfish? What about me? What about Jungkook and Jimin? So our feelings don’t matter here? What about others who see you as a friend and a sister?” brimming with tears, Yoongi looked hurt.

“Yoongi, If we stay this way..I cant make a choice. I can’t choose. I can’t hurt any of you” she said desperately. Her broken dams once again pained Yoongi. He hated to see those tears on her face.

Jungkook uttered stubbornly “We didn’t ask you to choose. Stay with us just like this. Don’t leave us” he looked away, feeling defeated.

“Jungkook.. Taehyung was right. We can’t stay like this forever. When the time comes, what will happen to all of us? I don’t want to risk this. Since everything is still new, let’s put it a stop. We just have to restart everything and pretend it never happen” Seul rubbed her arms expelling a heavy sigh in process.

This time around Jimin arose from his seat, lurching towards Seul causing the latter to take a cautious step backwards “Put it a stop? Are you toying with our feelings? Do you think this is a joke? Does it look like we are fooling around when we confess to you? Are you really just a bitch just like Taehyung claimed you to be?” Seul felt a pang in her heart. Her heart hardened swiftly.

“PARK JIMIN” he heard his hyungs protest behind him showing their disapproval with the choice of his words. The latter did not care of his surrounding, he wanted to set this thing straight. First, he had to make sure this girl knew she’s taking such a stupid decision.

Seul everted her gaze and stared blankly on the cold ground. She collected her thought refusing the memory of her father attacking her sane again. Why was thing happening to her every time she’s with them?

“Ji Seul, answer me. Are you really just bitching around?” Jimin grabbed her arms to gain her attention yet she stood still without uttering anything. She sucked in a breath and dipper her head, almost afraid he could read her uncertainty.

Seul tried to put a little space between them, but his arms were like band of ions. Jimin’s questions stirred up bitter memories in her. She tried hard to resist the memory from coming out, yet she failed.

 7 years ago

15 years old Ji Seul skidded home happily after getting her result. She was over the moon to show her excellent report card to her mother. Despite a rough year she had to face at home, she was able to make it out alive. She wouldn’t let it affect her studies.

Few months ago, she discovered the truth about her mother secret pregnancy. It turned out that her mother had been lying about her pregnancy from everyone. Mrs Hwang slept with his husband’s best friend and because of the mistakes that she committed, Seul happened. Mrs Hwang was afraid to reveal the truth since she’s already engaged to his husband that time, she didn’t want to ruin the future that they planned to build together. If she were to reveal the truth, Seul had to grow up without a father.

Her world falls apart. She had no one to tell leaving her with no choice but to lie for the baby inside her growing belly.

Hence, she told no one about it not even the man who’s responsible for her pregnancy.

The lies went on for years until that day his husband found out about the secret pregnancy from Seul’s birth certificate. For an odd reason, his name was not indicated clearly on the birth certificate making him question about Seul’s real father. Mrs Hwang might be lying to her husband about the baby, however she wouldn’t change the fact that Seul is someone else daughter.

One day, she meant to unravel the truth.

She didn’t have any intention to keep it from Seul forever. She was rather unlucky that her husband had to discover the truth this way. Ji’s household was a real mess after the revelation of a child born out of wedlock. Her father stopped coming home for a while. He quit his jobs and ruined their life. Mr Ji started to gamble, trashing his life for alcohol. He changed from a loving father to a hot-tempered man. He would only come back home when he has no money to gamble.

Mrs Hwang endured the pain from the beating and sometimes, the older man would vent it out on innocent Seul. She came to aid her mother every time her father flew into rage. It ended up pretty badly, as long as she’s able to protect her mother from his wrath, she was fine with it.

Twisting the doorknob with a gleeful smile, her step died upon seeing two grown up men sitting casually in the living room. The smells from the expensive cigars burnt her lungs. She didn’t like it at all.

One of the men was her evil father and she studied the stranger face beside him, he looked like he’s in early 40’s and he was dressed nicely in his black tux. The man looked filthy rich and dangerous. Seul bowed politely as a courtesy, when she about to leave, her father tugged her wrist putting her steps at halt.

“Where are you going?” he said dryly.

Seul sighed “My room? I want to find mother” his grip on her wrist tightened, fearing Seul.

“I want you to meet my friend. This is Mr Kwon. And, this is the girl that I have been talking about, Seul. She is 15 and fresh. Don’t worry, I am letting you to take her as your bitch as long as you pay me handsomely. I don’t need this bitch in my life anyway” his disgusting low voice making Seul sick in the stomach. She shuddered in fear as she struggled to escape from his strong grasp.

The man put down his cigar stub on the empty plate, scanning Seul’s body from head to toes. A sly smirk played across his face as he reached out to caress her cheeks “Pretty. The thought of owning this girl excites me. How much?” his eyes never left Seul as he continued to undress her with his eyes.

She cried helplessly begging to be released but her father showed no sympathy on her. He loathed her to the core. If by getting rid of Seul would satisfy him, that’s what he about to do.

“How much you are willing to pay for this bitch?” Seul winced in pain when she attempted to pull her hand from him. Closing her eyes tight, she prayed that everything was only a bad dream.

Bitch, I am just a bitch to him. She broke down.

“Enough for me to own her to myself”

“Don’t worry once I get the money. She is yours”

 Her breath hitched at the memory, Seul clasped onto something for support and that something happened to be Jimin’s arms. Jimin looked at her worriedly “Seul-ah…Are you alright?” her body shook vigorously, holding onto her breath. She felt a painful knot in his stomach and throat.

She knew exactly what’s coming to her. Panic attack.

“Seul-ya!” Jin called out, running to their side watching her body limping weakly against Jimin.

The image of breathless Seul brought on a surge of guilt in Jimin. “Seul.. Seul.. what happen?” body shaking with strain, his eye slocked on her face. “Goddamit, do something!” everyone spooked out did not know what to do until Hoseok stepped in with a deep frown.

Jimin held onto Seul’s body closed to him as the girl was practically clinging onto his shirt tightly, breathing heavily “Panic attack. It is panic attack. I had this once after BBMAS” his voice rose one octave convincing the member to trust his judgement.

“Okay, panic attack” Namjoon knelt beside Jimin, studying her expression. “What should we do Hoseok?” his eyes widened to hear her rapid breathing. Her eyes watered, blinking rapidly with hope to restore herself from this. She couldn’t do it. Not that she loses hope of herself, but the pain engulfed her heart making things harder for her to think all the good things and stay calm.

He blurted out “She said, if we hold our breath, it could stop your panic attack” Yoongi grew frustrated over Hoseok’s vague direction. “How the fuck we do that? She looked like she’s about to pass out” he glowered.

Jungkook bit his nails anxiously, scared if anything happened to the girl in Jimin’s embrace. He wouldn’t forgive himself if she got hurt. Everyone in this room would be held responsible.

“Well… she kinda kiss me to stop my panic attack” he hesitated to tell them about the moment he had with Seul. “What!” the members said in unison looking dumfounded. He hid himself behind Jin’s broad shoulder and cleared his throat to ease the awkwardness “Since I couldn’t do it by my own, she… took the matter in his own hand. This is no time fight, someone kiss her!” he exclaimed.

Once again panic took over the room, they had no idea what to do. Seul closed her eyes once again, clutching onto Jimin’s arm. She forced out the happy memory that she had with her friends and mother, yet it only to add more pain to her already bleeding heart.

“Someone do something!” Namjoon tapped his feet nervously.

Jungkook, Jimin and Yoongi exchanged a meaningful glance as if pushing each other to make the move but they didn’t realize the clock was ticking. Displeased with the trios’ hesitation, Jin grunted lowly and collected Seul in his large hands.

It garnered the trios’ attention towards the eldest member, the look that they had on their face was a mixture of disapproval and fear. Seul felt the warmth around her, but she was too tired to open her eyes.

“Seul..focus.. Steady your breathing” Jin whispered softly, the girl recoiled under his touch as he leaned in. His nose bumped into hers, then a second later their lips met. She felt a slight tremor from course through her as he felt Jin sucking her soul away rendering her breathless. It really worked on her as she was caught of guard by the kiss.

Every part of her body felt both alert and relaxed. Jin’s soft yet plump lips against her felt so wrong yet so right. His kiss mesmerized her, stopping time and clouding logic. The remaining members stood there watching Jin did his thing with a mixed feeling. Part of them wanted to smack Jin and pulled him off her, yet they had no idea if the kiss actually worked. They couldn’t risk this.

How long is he going to lock her lip with his. Yoongi rubbed his back head in frustration. He could have done it instead of making the older guy doing the job. Goodness, if and only Jungkook and Jimin weren’t so adamant about respecting each other feelings.

Jin pulled away, leaving her breathless “It works” he stroked his thumb over her moist lips.

Seul blushed madly upon realizing the whole situation. Jimin smacked Jin’s hand away making the older guy to release Seul’s face. “Seul-ah, I am sorry. I shouldn’t have said that thing again. Shit, I was frustrated and angry. I am sorry” she gasped softly when Jimin embraced her tightly. It was a little too tightly actually.

“Ji- Jim-..Jimin can’t breathe” she coughed a little as the clumsy guy released her examining her body, lifting her arms and cupping her cheeks. “Oh god, I am sorry Seul.. did I hurt you anywhere?” she chuckled softly.

Seul sighed “I am alright Jims. Don’t worry”

Jungkook glanced at her in bafflement, probably was still shock after Jin’s bold move few minutes ago. He had to hold the urge to pull his hyung’s hair one by one. The revenge would come soon, Kim Seokjin.

Yoongi let out a sigh of relief, as he handed the plain water to her “Drink. You need to cleanse your mouth from Kim Seokjin’s dirty breath” he rolled his eyes earning a loud smack against his back by the one and only Kim Seokjin.

“Yah! Min Yoongi are you insulting me!”

Seul cringed at the loud voice, quickly took the drink from Yoongi “Thank you..” she softly muttered.

 Everyone scattered in the room after the confrontation taking a small break since they didn’t want to overwhelm Seul. She was sitting at the corner cross legged watching the boys having their private talk with each other. On her right side, Jungkook, Jimin and Yoongi were immersed in their conversation. She wondered if she was the main topic since they kept on stealing a glance at her way. Whilst, Namjoon and Hoseok were making fun of Jin trying to be heroic, saving her ass a moment ago.  

Gosh, that was embarrassing. She really hated herself from allowing such things happened to her again.

Her eyes darted off across the room looking for Taehyung. To her disappointment he was nowhere to be seen, she grew frustrated over it. Seul wanted to see him to wash off this guilt inside her. That was the only way to not let herself live in this unbearable pain.

“Are you looking for me?” Taehyung low mumbled could only be heard by her as he settled down beside her. Seul played with her fingers searching for inspiration to spark the conversation with Taehyung. She valued her friendship with him but when it slowly shattered this way, it hurt her in so many ways. She wondered why it really affect her.

Taehyung had to take a deep breath before he could even speak. His fingers unconsciously linked with hers “I felt pretty terrible for causing this and putting you in an uncomfortable situation. I know it is not your fault that those three men falling head over heels for you. I am being too harsh on you. Forgive me Seul?” she linked their fingers together.

“You don’t have to apologize. I am sorry for being selfish” she expelled a sigh of relief because Taehyung finally opened up to her. “I know you are uncomfortable with this whole thing, I have think of this thoroughly. Just like I said I will pre-“Taehyung hushed her by pressing his long slender fingers against her lips.

She was taken aback by his gentle move “Don’t..Take back your words. Don’t leave. If you leave now, it will only hurt us. We don’t want you to leave us. I know we are taking such risk by letting you in, but we cant afford to lose you. We will manage this Seul-ah. In the future, whatever happens we know…we are confident with our friendship. Let the time be the judge. Lets just enjoy the present and live our life as it is” he traced her jawline, to her cheeks.

“Taehyung…I..” she was touched by his kind words. His gentleness, his strong gaze and his deep voice, it was alluring him.

“Trust me. Trust us. We are BTS. We have gone through bunch of shits together, it only makes us stronger. Stay with us, make us feel more human. Only you can do that, Seul” he caressed his cheeks and quickly wiped the small tears which started to roll down again wetting her cheeks.

The members were firstly engrossed in their own things were watching two of them closely. They could finally breath a clear air now that Taehyung and Seul had reconciled. There were a lot of things happening in one day. With Yoongi and Jungkook unusual side that they’d never seen before, Seul’s making an appearance at the company helped to unravel everything.

They looked forward to this blossoming relationship with Seul.

The present sounded interesting to live from now on.

This work belongs to  Chimswae © 2020. All Rights Reserved

#btscaretaker #bts fic #btsfic #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts idolau #bts series #jungkook x oc #yoongi x oc #bts x oc #yoongi fluff #jungkook romance #yoongi romance #bts fluff

[mark-absolutelyfullycapable-lee]

Bad Boy in Love | Lee Donghyuck [1/2]

Summary: Lee Donghyuck is kind of a douche—old news—but will he change his ways when the one girl he wants (you) rejects him—or even worse, likes someone else?

Pairing: Donghyuck x Reader

Genre: angst, fluff, comedy, Bad boy!Donghyuck (i guess lmao), lowkey enemies-to-lovers

Warnings: some swearing

Word Count: 7.3k

A/N: hey guys! i’m back again!!!!! lemme start with saying i’m so sorry i was gone for like forever! life gets in the way sometimes, but i’m back. anyways, I named this “Bad Boy in Love” because i was listening to Man in Love by infinite while i wrote this lmaoooo. anyways i thank you all for your support and i hope you enjoy this Donghyuck scenario<3 idk about you guys but i think i’m pretty funny ahahhhaa

☯︎

“I swear, she better not try to talk to me again. Like, do I seriously look like I’d date someone like her?” You hear Donghyuck’s friends laugh as he tells them a story of how he rejected a poor girl’s confession.

You scoff and turn to your friend, Renjun. “He’s such a douche. Why would any girl like him? Or any of his stupid friends?” You question why the girls at your school go for guys like Donghyuck and his friends Jeno and Mark. Donghyuck is a jerk--no--he’s the jerk.

Next to you, Chenle, your best friend, chuckles, stealing one of your fries. “It’s because they have hidden charms, Y/N.”

“Hidden charms my ass.” You whisper, rolling your eyes. You seriously wonder why all guys can’t be like Renjun or Chenle or Jisung. They’re all so sweet and they’re gentlemen. Even your friend Xuxi, who is the King of Dumb Decisions, is more mannered that that trio.

But Na Jaemin definitely takes the cake for the King of Perfection. He’s got it all. From his looks, to his grades, to his personality. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t have a crush on him. Who wouldn’t? You and Jaemin have only known each other since the beginning of the school year, but you’ve both taken a liking to one another. You keep your feelings for Jaemin to yourself because he’s a great kid and you wouldn’t want to ruin the friendship you both are building together.

Speaking of Jaemin, he shows up with an English textbook. “I’m so tired from studying. I feel like my brain’s fried.” He says sadly as he takes a seat next to you, putting his head on your shoulder.

“I’ll take your mind off of it.” You assure him. Jaemin lifts his head off your shoulder and smiles at you before putting his arm around your shoulder. You feel the butterflies go crazy, but you ignore them.

As Jaemin puts his arm around you, you don’t feel Donghyuck’s gaze on you. He’s very annoyed with this kid who transferred from God knows where and is already making more progress with you than him.

“Dude, just talk to her already.” Mark says, resulting in Donghyuck shaking his head, taking his eyes off of you.

“I don’t like her, why would I talk to her?” That’s a lie, and Donghyuck knows it. But how could the Lee Donghyuck, proclaimed Bad Boy like a nobody girl like you?

“Yeah, like any of us believe that. We know you like her.” Jeno chuckles, earning a punch on the arm from Donghyuck. He brushes it off. “You better confess before someone else does.”

“Oh yeah, aren’t her and that transfer kid dating?” Mark asks, pointing towards Jaemin.

Donghyuck rolls his eyes before standing up to throw his lunch tray away. “They’re not dating. She doesn’t like him.”

“He definitely likes her. I don’t get why he doesn’t just tell her. Who would turn Donghyuck down?” Jeno shrugs at Mark’s statement and question.

Meanwhile, Donghyuck’s brain is somewhere else. There’s only one thing on his mind: Is Y/N dating that stupid transfer student, Jaemin? He keeps telling himself that he shouldn’t be worried about you, but he is. That kid has no right to come in and steal you away from him.

“She will be my girlfriend.” Donghyuck whispers to himself.

“Dude, that’s seriously creepy.” Mark says to his friend as the bell signaling the end of lunch rings. Donghyuck ignore’s him and the trio gets up, along with their followers, and begins to exit the cafeteria.

Donghyuck’s eyes travel over to where you and Jaemin are walking. He’s officially in a bad mood because you and Jaemin as a ‘thing’ is taking over his brain. “I hate him.”

“Who? Jaemin?” Jeno jokes, making both him and Mark laugh.

Mark slings his arm around Donghyuck’s shoulder. “There’s no reason to hate him. You’re the Lee Donghyuck. You can get any girl you want.” He reassures him.

Donghyuck nods. Mark’s right, he thinks to himself. I am the Lee Donghyuck. I’m the school’s most notorious bad boy. All girls have had a crush on him at one point, so why is he so worried about you not liking him back?

“Hyuck, homecoming’s coming up soon. Why don’t you ask her with like a sign, and shit. She’ll definitely say yes.” Jeno suggests as the three walk down the hall towards their seventh period classes.

Mark suddenly claps and cheers loudly at Jeno’s idea, causing you and Jaemin to look back. For a slight second, you and Donghyuck make eye contact. It doesn’t last long because Jaemin quickly says something, taking away your attention from Donghyuck.

Whatever Jaemin said is making Y/N laugh way too much. For a minute, Donghyuck swears he hears his name, and then the sound of yours and Jaemin’s laughter.

This will not do. Donghyuck sends daggers to the back of Jaemin’s head. He’s going to take what’s his—you—and he will destroy Na Jaemin along the way.

Jeno taps Donghyuck’s shoulder, bringing him back to reality. “Why are you staring at the wall like that? Come on, we’re already here, might as well actually go to class.” Instead of following Jeno into the classroom, Donghyuck makes his way towards the bathroom. Homecoming is two weeks away, so if he wants to make this plan happen, he has to move quick.

As he gets to the bathroom, he hears humming coming from inside. He walks in to see Na Jaemin washing his hands.

“Na Jaemin.” Donghyuck says loudly, catching Jaemin off guard.

Jaemin turns around to dry his hands with a smile. “That’s me. What can I do for you?”

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. This guy. “I need you to stay away from Y/N. You have no business with her.”

“Y/N? She’s one of my close friends. We’re always together, I can’t stay away.” Jaemin smiles sweetly at him.

Donghyuck puts his hand on his head, trying to calm himself down. Is this kid really that stupid? “Are you dumb? Just don’t question it! Stay away from Y/N.” He shouts.

As he finishes his sentence, the two boys hear a gasp come from the door. They turn to see Y/N’s number one, all time, ultimate best friend: Zhong Chenle.

“What about my Y/N? Why does Jaemin need to stay away from her? Why is Lee Donghyuck worried about her?” Chenle steps closer to Donghyuck with every question. If anyone knows Chenle, they know he’s pretty much scared of nothing (except haunted houses and spiders).

“H-hey, don’t come closer or you’ll regret it.” Donghyuck says, his voice unsure. He’s not scared of this kid hurting him—he’s afraid of him telling Y/N he likes her.

Chenle snickers, crossing his arms and giving Donghyuck a mean glare. He takes a brave step towards the older boy. “Excuse me? Did I just overhear you talking about my best friend?” He raises his hand in a fist, preparing to hit Donghyuck if he has to. “Now tell me what you were talking about before I beat it out of you.”

Donghyuck involuntarily flinches violently away from Chenle as Jaemin watches on in amused fascination.

“F-fine.” Donghyuck shouts. He stands up and straightens his jacket up as he looks at Y/N’s best friend. He clears his throat. “I-i—he...J-Jaemin’s threatening my chances with Y/N.” He says defensively.

Chenle sighs, clicking his tongue in disapproval. “Silly Donghyuck. Jaemin has nothing to do with that. It’s all you.”

“What?”

Chenle walks up next to Donghyuck and slings his arm casually around the older male’s shoulders. “I need to make sure you actually like her and see if you’re just trying to play with her emotions or not.” Chenle explains. He turns to look right at Donghyuck. “And if you’re just trying to mess with her, you will feel my wrath.”

Donghyuck gulps at the malicious smile on the younger boys face. For such an innocent looking kid, he sure can be scary.

“Chenle, lay off of the poor guy. You’re scaring him.” Jaemin gently pulls Chenle off of Donghyuck. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t find this amusing though.

“H-he is not scaring me.” Donghyuck scoffs defensively.

“Sure...” Jaemin chuckles.

“I’m Lee Donghyuck. I’m not scared of anything, okay?”

Ignoring that, Chenle speaks up. “So tell me. Do you really like her or are you just trying to make her another one of your conquests?”

“I-I think I like her.” Donghyuck admits. “She makes me feel weird, nervous and tingly.” Chenle looks at him for a moment before sighing.

“You’re such a pervert. I’ll answer your questions about her. Don’t think I’m gonna help you though. You’re on your own for that part, buddy.”

“What? Really?” Donghyuck asks, pleasantly surprised. Chenle nods, looking at his nails. “What’s her favorite color?” He asks.

Chenle stares at Donghyuck for a moment. He can’t be serious, right? “What the—I literally said I would answer any questions you have about her and this is what you ask? What her favorite color is?” Chenle yells exasperatedly, beginning to walk out of the restroom. “I give up. You’re on your own.”

“No! Wait!” Donghyuck whines, pulling Chenle’s arm desperately. “D-does she like him?” He gestures towards Jaemin, who waves as he exits the bathroom.

Chenle sighs before patting Donghyuck’s shoulder. “She’s definitely waiting in line for the love rollercoaster. He just might like her too, so if you’re going to do something, act quickly.” He explains before beginning to walk out. “I got out of class to get a drink from the water fountain and I’ve been missing for like seven minutes. If I get in trouble, I’m blaming you, Donghyuck.”

“Y-you better not tell anyone about this.” Donghyuck stutters out. 

As Chenle leaves, Donghyuck runs into the last stall and sits on the floor. He pulls out his phone and immediately starts writing his plan.

This has to work or else Donghyuck will be devastated.

☯︎

It’s been two days since Donghyuck’s bathroom encounter with Jaemin and Chenle. Donghyuck has had lots of time to think about how he should ask Y/N to homecoming. He’s prepared everything and as soon as the bell signaling lunch rings, it’s go time.

“Dude, stop being nervous. It’ll be fine.” Mark chuckles, hitting Donghyuck upside his head. 

Donghyuck smacks Mark’s hand away and tries to fix his hair. “I am not nervous, I’m Donghyuck. Now leave me alone.” 

“Just remember, confidence is the key to success.” Mark declares firmly, with his fist in the air.

Suddenly, the three of them hear a scoff coming from the left of them and then Chenle passing them. “The key to success? Who are you? DJ Khaled?” He rolls his eyes. “Let me see your sign.” He demands, pointing to the rolled up poster board in Donghyuck’s hands. 

Donghyuck slowly unrolls it before holding it up for Chenle to see. Chenle’s eyes scan the paper before he throws his head back in laughter. 

Donghyuck looks at the sign and furrows his brows. Now, he’s worried.”What? What’s wrong with it?”

“What do you mean what’s wrong with it?” Donghyuck looks at his poster. I guess it is a little plain. His poster read ‘Y/N, Come to HOCO w/ Me!’ He signs before throwing the paper on the ground. “She’s never gonna like me back!” 

Chenle rolls his eyes and reaches into his bookbag. “I made a backup, because for some reason, I new you were going to mess up!” He flashes an annoyed, but pleased with himself smile at the older boy. 

“Hey, who are you? He’s the Lee Donghyuck! Don’t talk to him like--” Mark stands up and steps towards Chenle. Chenle stares at Mark with an unamused expression. 

Donghyuck pushes Mark away from Chenle, quicker than you can stay absolutelyfullycapable. “Dude, stop! He’s like, scary.” He whispers. Jeno and Mark look at each other, both highly confused, but they just shrug.

Chenle glares at Mark and Jeno before handing Donghyuck the poster. “Here.” As he passes the posterboard over, the trio sees visible trails of glitter falling from it. The poster unrolls, and Lee Donghyuck is more than amazed. The poster reads:

‘I’m Lee Donghyuck and I really like you, if you come to hoco with me, I’ll stop being a douche!’

“This is,” Donghyuck breathes out. “The best thing I’ve ever laid my eyes on--I mean, besides Y/N--but this is great! How long did it take you to come up with this?” 

“Like two minutes.” Chenle says, casually going through his phone as they approach the cafeteria. The bell rings, and the students begin pouring out of the classrooms, ready to chill with their friends.

Usually, Donghyuck is not nervous in front of crowds. But today is different. He’s actually afraid of being rejected by you. 

Meanwhile, you’re clueless as to what’s about to happen--and so is Jaemin. So when you hear the cafeteria errupt into cheers and screams, you’re confused. But when you feel a tap on your shoulder, you turn to see a very nervous looking Lee Donghyuck holding a poster. Confused you ask if it’s for you, to which he nods, shyly. 

This is bad. You think to yourself. He looks way too serious to be playing a prank on you.

Donghyuck takes a deep breath before walking closer to you. “Y/N! I like you and I want to go to homecoming with you! Would you please go with me?” Even though you don’t necessarily like Donghyuck, you’re not heartless. He took time out of his life to do all of this and ask you to homecoming. You’re not going to harshly decline his request in front of a good chunk of the student body.

Beside you, Jaemin turns to Donghyuck as well. “I already asked her. We’re going together. Sorry, man.” He sends an apologetic smile to Donghyuck.

The look on Donghyuck’s face is enough to bring the cafeteria to silence. “I-I’m sorry, Donghyuck.” You apologize, embarrassed at all the attention on you. From how you perceive him, you expect him to get angry and start a fight with Jaemin. Normally, he might, but since you’re here and you already hate his guts, Donghyuck decides against it.

“I-I, Y/N-it’s,” He stutters out, ears red as ever. “It’s okay.” Flustered out of his mind, Donghyuck sets the sign by Chenle, who’s sat next to you, and hastily walks out of the cafeteria.

Why do I feel this way? Did I just get rejected? His mind is all over the place. As he exits the cafeteria, he can feel his heart racing—it’s loud and beating quite fast. Donghyuck stops right as he enters the bathroom. He places his hands on his knees and tries to catch his breath and slow down his heart rate. Donghyuck is starting to feel even weirder—if that’s even possible. His palms are becoming even more clamy than before, his heart is still beating faster than the average rate, and he feels a lump forming in his throat.

Lee Donghyuck doesn’t cry! He tells himself. Why would he cry over you when he could get any other girl?

Because he really does like you—more than he originally thought.

Donghyuck clears his throat and stands up with his back facing the mirror. There’s no way he could look at himself in this state.

“You’re so stupid, Donghyuck!” He yells at himself, punching the wall. First off—mistake. His tears threaten to fall, but Lee Donghyuck has been trained over the years to not show when he’s feeling emotionally overwhelmed because ‘men aren’t supposed to display how they feel’. He’s been through worse and he’s kept it together. Why is it so hard for him to stay put together now?

Donghyuck is forced to pull it together when he hears someone enter the bathroom behind him. He turns away and wipes his eyes, so even if he had tears, they weren’t noticeable.

“Are you okay?” It was Chenle. He feels bad, because he feels like it’s partially his fault for te situation. If he had known that Jaemin asked Y/N, he would have never let Donghyuck embarrass himself like that. But not even Chenle knew Jaemin asked her.

Donghyuck coughs loudly to clear his throat. “Of course I’m okay, I’m Lee Donghyuck. I don’t get my feelings hurt by pretty boys who are smart, nice, have great personalities, and steal the one thing I actually want, away from me.” He shakes his head, keeping his face out of Chenle’s view. “Why did you let me go out there and embarrass myself?” Donghyuck questions in a hushed voice.

Chenle feels really bad right now, but at the same time, he thinks that maybe Donghyuck has learned a lesson. “To be fair, I had no idea that Jaemin asked her.” He puts his hand on Donghyuck’s shoulder. “But I think you needed a taste of your own medicine for once. This is how you make so many girls feel all the time. At least Y/N wasn’t rude to you like you are to the people who confess to you.”

Donghyuck hates it, but Chenle’s right. He knows he’s a jerk, but he never really stopped and thought about how others felt from his actions. “I don’t want to feel like this again.”

“If you’re still serious about Y/N, I have an idea. The least I can do is help you guys become friends.” Chenle says to him. Donghyuck spins to face the younger boy, nodding, signaling him to continue.

Chenle explains his plan, and halfway through their last period, they’ve finished planning. “I don’t know how to thank you.” Donghyuck sends a genuine smile to Chenle, who chuckles softly.

“Just be good to Y/N. Seeing her happy is enough for me.”

Soon enough, the end of the school day approaches, the weekend is officially here, and Operation Take-What’s-Mine begins.

☯︎

“So when were you going to tell me that Jaemin asked you to homecoming?” Chenle questions, slamming him lemon water on the table. Every Friday after school, you and Chenle go to the same cafe and get food, since the cafeteria food isn’t that good. You knew something was wrong with Chenle when he ordered the lemon water instead of his usual chocolate milk. He only orders a water when he’s feeling mature, but a water with lemon? You knew something was on his mind.

You sigh. “Chenle, I didn’t even know we were going together until he said that to Donghyuck.” You explain to your best friend. 

“What do you mean you didn’t know?” 

“He never asked me. When I said something to him after the whole lunch situation, he just said that he knew I didn’t like Donghyuck and he didn’t want me to go with him out of guilt.” You tell him. Chenle is shocked, but quickly grins widely.

“This is great news!” He cheers. “Excuse me, can I get a chocolate milk?” He shouts to a waiter passing by. 

You squint at him. Why is this good news? “Why are you so happy? He’s not even going with me because he likes me.” 

Chenle laughs at your sad expression. You’re seriously getting annoyed with him laughing in your face about a boy not liking you. “Y/N, I’m about to say something to you I never thought I’d say in a million years,” He begins. “I think you should get to know Donghyuck as well. See who’s better for you, Jaemin or Donghyuck.”

You scoff at him. “Chenle!”

“Y/N!” Chenle shouts back. “Don’t tell him I told you, but this kid has a serious crush on you! I went to talk to him after he walked out of the cafeteria today. I think he almost cried.” You’re honestly speechless. “He’s changed recently. He’s a lot nicer now than he was before.”

You sigh. “It’s not like I’ll be mean to him. Of course I’ll be decent to him.”

“Okay, great. Let’s go to that party tonight then.” Chenle smiles, clapping happily like a seal.

“Party? You?” You ask, shocked. “You at a party? Chenle, you don’t even know what the word party means.”

“Actually, I threw the littest party in the history of the 6th grade so... check your facts, honey.” Chenle sasses back. “We’re going tonight and there’s nothing you can do to change that.”

You sigh again. Once Chenle gets like this, there’s no changing his mind. “Fine. I’ll go to the stupid party will you, but you owe me.”

Chenle claps, happily. The waiter brings his chocolate milk and the two of you continue talking, but about other topics.

Meanwhile, Donghyuck is flipping out. Chenle texted him saying that you agreed to go to Jeno’s party and now Donghyuck is rummaging through his closet trying to find some presentable clothes.

“If I’m being honest--” Mark begins, but Donghyuck cuts him off.

“If you’re being honest, you think she won’t care about what I’m wearing. Yeah, yeah. Well I care about it. I have to look good.” 

He states. Mark raises his hands in defense. “I was just trying to help. Chill.”

Donghyuck sighs. “I-I know.” he runs his hand through his hair. “This is an actual chance to impress her, and I don’t want to screw it up.”

“I know, man. I think she’ll really like the real you.” He tells his younger friend. Donghyuck and Mark bro hug before he pulls out a random shirt from Donghyuck’s dresser. “This looks nice.” And that’s what Donghyuck goes with. A lavender button up, to show Y/N his classy yet casual side. 

Donghyuck is ready to prove to Y/N just how much he actually likes her. His and Chenle’s plan should work out perfectly. 

- 

Jeno’s family isn’t necessarily ‘loaded’, but they do have a nice sized house. You’re stunned as you and Chenle pull up to the house. “There’s already so many people here.” You say as you and Chenle step out of the uber you guys took to the party. Chenle gives the driver money and gets out as well.

“Yeah, it’s Lee Jeno’s party we’re talking about. Of course there’s a lot of people.” Chenle links his arm with yours. “No doing illegal things under any circumstances!” He demands.

“That’s not what’s on my mind anyways.” You mumble as you guys walk through the back.

“Hey, Y/N--OH MY GOD! Is that Zhong Chenle at a party?” Xuxi yells across the yard. He’s standing at the back door to the house, and waves you guys over. But before you can follow Chenle over to Xuxi, you feel a tug on your arm. 

As Chenle leaves your side, you turn to see the one and only Donghyuck standing in front of you. 

“H-hey.” He stutters out with a small, nervous smile on his face. 

“Hey, Donghyuck.” You respond. It feels kind of awkward at first, but that’s expected. 

“Do you wanna go inside? It’s kind of chilly out here.” He suggests, gesturing for you to go in front. You nod and walk towards the door. “You look really pretty, by the way.” He compliments you, quietly.

You feel your cheeks become heated. “Thanks. You too.” You say, before realizing your mistake. “I mean, you look handsome!” 

Donghyuck chuckles as he pushes the door open for you. “It’s okay, I know what you meant.” As you two enter the house, you immediately see Chenle on the table with a red solo cup in his hand. 

“That better be non-alcoholic!” You point at him. 

He looks at you incredulously. “Y/N, I’m a junior in high school! Let me live and mind your own business!” 

You roll your eyes before you see Xuxi waving his arms, trying to grab your attention. He mouths the words ‘it’s water’ and you laugh at your dumb best friend. You smile a little to yourself before Donghyuck grabs your attention again.

“Hey, uh, wanna go down to the basement?” He asks you a little awkwardly, pointing his thumb over his shoulder.

You eye him incredulously. “The basement? What the hell? No.”

Donghyuck panics a little. “N-no, I didn’t mean for it to sound weird like that. The basement is quieter and we’d probably be able to talk down there.” He explains in a rush. You nod.

“Alright, I guess we can.” You shrug, beginning to follow him towards the stairs.

“You know, it’s good that we’re going down here.” Donghyuck starts telling you over his shoulder. “Nobody will disturb us. We kind of have this little pact where if we’re seen taking a girl into the basement, nobody will come down and bother us.” He smiles as a feeling of dread begins washing over you.

The two of you reach the door leading to the basement stairs only to see a very sketchy, dark stairway. “Um, Donghyuck? I don’t know if I want to come down here anymore...”

“Don’t be silly, Y/N, it’ll be fine.” He grabs your wrist, forcing you down the stairs along with him. You prepare to run and scream when you notice that the basement isn’t, in fact, creepy. It’s actually really nice. “Oh, awesome. Mario Kart’s up! Do you like Mario Kart?”

You look at Donghyuck with a strange expression on your face. “U-uh, yeah. I like Mario Kart.” You nod slowly.

“Awesome. Wanna play? I call Baby Mario.” Donghyuck races to the plush-looking couch and quickly grabs one of the two controllers laying on it. You carefully walk over and sit next to him, grabbing the last controller and watching as he sets up a 2-player game for the both of you.

You each select your characters--him going with Baby Mario and you going with Baby Peach--and the game begins. “Y/N, I like you and I want you to have an actual good impression of me but...” Donghyuck turns to face you, giving you a sympathetic look. “But you're about to get destroyed right now.”

You scoff, tightening your grip on your controller. “Fine. Let’s battle, DongYUCK.” You glare at him.

Donghyuck frowns at that. “Am I really that disgusting?”

You roll your eyes. “Let’s just play.” And you do. The two of you race through all three laps of the chosen level and, to your dismay, you’re left in twelfth place spinning out of control across the finish line due to one of Donghyuck’s sneaky bananas.

“Aren’t you supposed to, I don’t know, let your date win in these types of games?” You ask him, a little irked that he hadn’t let you win.

“Yeah.” Donghyuck nods. “You let me win.” He grins happily at you. You roll your eyes, wanting to be mad, but it’s hard to pretend to be angry when he’s giving you such a sweet look.

“Whatever.” You snicker.

Donghyuck sets his controller down and moves closer to you on the couch, a slight blush appearing on his face. “Wait, you said this was a date.” 

“I mean, isn’t that what it is?” You ask, placing your controller next to his. 

“If you want it to be.” Donghyuck looks anywhere but you.

“You’re acting like this is a date.” You chuckle. 

Donghyuck clears his throat. “Uh, yeah. This is a date, Y/N.” He readjusts his jacket and turns to face you. “You want to get some food? Jeno ordered like, thirty pizzas.” You nod, with a small smile. The two of you get up and begin to walk up the basement stairs. He pushes the door open and the both of you exit. 

“I don’t wanna lose you in the crowd, stay close.” Donghyuck tells you. You decide to grab his hand so you don’t get lost. When you feel Donghyuck’s hand tense up and see him look back at you with wide eyes, you avert your gaze. This is just so you don’t get lost. It’s not like you want to hold his hand or anything.

The two of you make it to the kitchen where Donghyuck goes to fetch you guys some water while you get both of you some pizza. You stand there, staring at the make-your-own-pizza setup, which you think is weird because who sets up something like this at a house party? You dismiss that thought and begin putting ingredients on the pizzas when Donghyuck sneaks up to your side.

“What are you doing?” He asks you, making you jump a little.

“What does it look like? I’m making your food.” You roll your eyes a little, but Donghyuck takes the plate form your hands and throws it in the trash. “What the hell?”

“Never take ingredients from the bowls.” Donghyuck shakes his head.

“Then where am I supposed to get the ingredients from, huh?”

“You have to look under the table for the fresh stuff.” He says, lifting the table cloth to reveal better looking food.

“How would I have possibly known that? It’s not like I’ve ever been here before.” You say as you reach for another plate. You put the (safe) ingredients on both yours and Donghyuck’s pizzas and follow him to what looks to be the dining room, but it has a couch?

“Jeno pulls the couch in here because he doesn’t like people sitting at his dining room table.” Donghyuck explains as he leads you over to it. It doesn’t make a lot of sense, because who’s going to follow that rule at a house party? 

The couch is pretty crowded, but he is the Lee Donghyuck, so it doesn’t take that long for people to leave when they seem him approaching. You two take a seat and begin to eat your pizzas. 

 “Wow, you put together some decent tasting pizzas.” Donghyuck says, astonished. “I’m shocked, to say the least.”

You roll your eyes. That’s not even a compliment. You watch as Donghyuck takes another bite. “Wow, you’re a messy eater.” 

“What?” You can just barely understand what he’s saying as he speaks with a mouth full of food. 

“I said,” You grab a napkin from underneath your plate. “You’re eating so carelessly. There’s food all around your mouth.” Before you can even think, you’re reaching over to wipe the pizza sauce off of Donghyuck’s face.

Donghyuck is obviously taken by surprise as you clean him up. And he’s not the only one.

“Y-Y/N? What are you doing?” Both you and Donghyuck turn to see Na Jaemin staring at you with wide eyes. “Why’re you with him?” He takes a step closer to you guys.

“Jaemin?” You quickly move your hand away from Donghyuck’s face. “What are you doing here?” You question.

“No, Y/N, answer my question. What are you doing here with Donghyuck?” The look in Jaemin’s eyes are sharp and menacing as he glares at Donghyuck before looking back to you.

You scoff a little. “Why are you being so rude? I’m not obligated to tell you anything.” 

Jaemin takes a deep breath. “I-I just wanna know why you’re here with him. I thought we had something.” 

“What?” You stand up. “Jaemin, two people can’t be together if it’s not discussed.” 

By now, an audience was starting to form. “I thought it was obvious, Y/N! I thought you understood the signs I was giving you!” Jaemin raises his voice, frustrated. “And the homecoming thing? Wasn’t that enough for you?” 

“That’s not how any of that works. You can’t just assume, Jaemin.” You respond, quietly. You feel guilty, but upset at the same time, and that’s evident to Jaemin, Donghyuck and everyone else watching. “I think I wanna leave.” You say to Donghyuck. You begin to walk out of the house, Donghyuck following close behind. 

“Y/N, wait.” Jaemin calls after you. He attempts to grab onto your wrist, but he’s forcibly pushed away by Donghyuck.

“Dude, hands off.” Donghyuck warns. Jaemin glares at him before looking to you again.

“Y/N... are we at least still going to homecoming together?” The sadness in Jaemin’s voice makes you turn around to face him, only to see Donghyuck attempting to manhandle him.

“She doesn’t want to talk to you. Just go away.”

“Donghyuck, it’s fine.” You sigh, turning to Jaemin. “At this point... I don’t think it would be a good idea for us to go together.”

With that, you walk away, Donghyuck by your side as you walk down the street and away from Jeno’s party. It’s silent until Donghyuck elbows you not-so-gently. “I know I should have said something earlier, but my car’s in the opposite direction.” He chuckles awkwardly.

You sigh, shaking your head. “You’re an idiot.” The two of you turn around and walk to his car. 

You and Donghyuck reach his car. He opens the passenger side door for you before jogging to the drivers seat and starting the car. “Where do you want to go?” 

-

“What are we doing here?” You ask in confusion as Donghyuck parks on the side of the street. What the hell are you guys doing in this rich ass neighborhood? Homeboy ignores you. He walks up to a very nice looking house. Nicer than Jeno’s. “Donghyuck! Are you trying to break in?” You question panickedly. You seriously do not want to catch a case, especially before you finish high school.

“We have to sneak to the back and climb up the lattice.” Donghyuck says calmy, ignoring you once again. He leads you towards a bush, covering part of the fence. He squats and holds back part of the bush, revealing a hole leading to the backyard. “Ladies first.” He smiles.

“What the hell, Donghyuck! I’m not helping you break into a house!” You shout.

Donghyuck stands up hastily and shushes you. “I’m not breaking into any houses!” He whisper yells. “We have to sneak in because if my brother wakes up, I’m dead.” He explains.

You freeze. “Wait... you live here?” You ask in disbelief. Donghyuck nods, slightly embarrassed. “Wow, that makes no sense.”

Donghyuck gestures for you to crawl through the hole--which you do--and quickly comes in behind you. He then pushes past you and begins climbing up the back of the house, only to open a window and scurry back down. “You go in first. Just in case you fall, I’ll be here to catch you.”

You scoff. “What makes you think I’d fall? I actually won the Rock Climbing Relays in fourth grade.” You inform him, a matter-of-factly.

“Uh, whatever. Just climb.” He rolls his eyes. You start your journey up the lattice, and to be honest, it’s kind of scary. “Don’t worry, I’m right behind you.”

“Wow, that makes me feel so much better.” You say, sarcasm dripping from your voice. 

After what seems like forever, you reach the window and pull yourself through. You glance outside to see Donghyuck almost to the top. You reach your arms out and he gladly takes a hold of them. You help him through, and once you’re both finally in, you take a look around. It’s a long, dark corridor with pictures lining the walls. In the majority of the pictures, you see Donghyuck, an older boy, who you assume is his brother, and a lady, who you can definitely tell is his mother. 

“Follow me, my room’s this way.” Donghyuck takes your hand and gently pulls you down the hall. His room is at the end of the hall, and when you enter, you’re shocked, to say the least. “So, this is the crib.” He chuckles, awkwardly. 

Donghyuck has polaroids all over his room and fairy lights. It’s definitely not what you though Lee Donghyuck’s bedroom would look like. “Can I look at these?” You ask as you pick up a photo album. 

“Oh, uh, I guess. It’s from, like a long time ago. It’s embarrassing.” Donghyuck’s face becomes red. You open the photos and you can kind of understand why he would be embarrassed--because half the pictures aren’t old, and look to be from the past school year. 

“You were so cute!” You gasp as you point to a baby picture of him. 

“I still am.” Donghyuck jokes. You laugh, but silently agree with him. The kid is pretty cute and the both of you know it.

After looking through the pictures, conversation flows naturally between the two of you. You talk about everything, answer questions about yourselves, but there’s one thing on your mind that you want to ask him about. “Donghyuck?” You say his name.

“Y/N?” He smiles at you. 

“I like this side of you,” You begin. “Why don’t you show this side at school? Why do you act like such a jerk?” 

Donghyuck knew this was coming. And to be honest, he doesn’t really have an excuse for his disrespectful behavior. “I... I don’t know.” He admits. You tilt your head in confusion, but allow him to continue. “I guess I like the attention I get.”

“From the girls?”

“I guess.” Donghyuck blushes, but begins to ask you another question, but this time he’s completely serious. “What do you see in Na Jaemin?”

“W-what?” You’re taken off guard. Is it really that obvious that you take some interest in Jaemin?

Donghyuck chuckles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “I’m serious, Y/N. What does he have that I don’t?” He gazes up at you. “What’s so good about him?” 

You ponder on his questions for a few seconds. “Jaemin is just... You’re a little...” You shift at the tension. “You guys are too different to compare.” 

“Just say what you want Y/N. I won’t get offended, if that’s what you’re thinking.” 

You sigh. “Well, to be honest,” You clear your throat. “Jaemin is like every little girl’s dream boy. He’s smart, athletic, tall, and--boy--is he handsome.” 

Donghyuck rolls his eyes, but lets you continue.

“But you, Donghyuck--you’re an interesting character. At first, I thought you were just a douche bag, but you seem to be so much more than that!” You laugh at the thought. It’s only been one night, but you feel like you could definitely get used to the real Donghyuck.

“I hope that’s a good thing,” Donghyuck chuckles, leaning against his headboard. “Because I really like you, Y/N.” You blush, once again and stay quiet, unsure of what to say.

You feel the bed move and you soon see Donghyuck’s smiling face. “It’s getting pretty late. Let’s get you home.” With that, he gets up and walks out of his bedroom, leaving you flustered. You quickly follow him out and exit his house the same way you came in. Your night with Donghyuck definitely went better than expected.

☯︎

The day of homecoming actually came very quickly. But, surprisingly, the only people you have spoken with were Chenle, Jisung, and Donghyuck. After the party at Jeno’s, you and Donghyuck formed a good friendship. Your relationship with Jaemin on the other hand, is still in shambles. 

“I’m sure he’s sorry. I mean, it’s just not like him to have no remorse.” Chenle says to you as the two of you walk to the drugstore. You needed to get a few last minute things to prepare for homecoming, and Chenle decided to tag along.

You sigh. “I know, I just--I don’t want this to ruin our friendship for good.” You enter the store and head straight to the makeup section, because you were definitely not forgetting fake eyelashes for the second year in a row. 

“Y/N, this is Na Jaemin we’re talking about. Trust me when when I say that everything will turn out okay.” Chenle pats your shoulder, reassuringly. “Now, why did you need these things again?” He points to the eyelashes.

“Because I want them. Now please, can you help me pick the best ones?” You ask your best friend. Chenle chuckles and nods. 

As you and Chenle get the last minute things you need from the drugstore, you hear a very familiar voice come from the aisle over.

“I think a mask with charcoal would be the best to use before homecoming. Don’t you agree?” 

You glance at Chenle, but you see him already walking around the corner. “Jaemin! What’s up? I haven’t seen you in a while.” Jaemin? You internally panic. Chenle won’t bring you into the conversation, right?

As Chenle disappears from your view, you try to quietly tiptoe in the opposite direction. Honestly, you could have been successful if it wasn’t for your best friend’s big mouth.

“Actually, I came here with Y/N. She’s right over here.” You cringe as you hear Chenle’s words. What a friend.

You slowly turn back around to see the person you’ve been avoiding: Na Jaemin.

“H-hey, Jaemin. What’s crackalackin’?” You chuckle awkwardly.

Jaemin sends a soft smile your way. “Long time no see, Y/N. How’ve you been?” 

“I’m good, and you?” You keep up the basic, yet awkward conversation, hoping it will end soon.

“I’m great.” Jaemin’s smile never leaves his face. “How’s Donghyuck? Are you guys dating?”

Your eyes dart around at anything but Jaemin’s face. Luckily for you though, Chenle chimes in. “Her and Donghyuck definitely are not dating.” He says sassily. “They’re just talk--” You hurriedly slap a hand over Chenle’s mouth, laughing nervously.

“We’re just friends.” You tell Jaemin, feeling a bit bashful as he looks at you with an expression that tells you he doesn’t believe you.

“So, um... are you still mad at me?” Jaemin asks, changing the subject.

“Of course I’m not.” You feel the tension in your shoulders disappear. “I’m just as much in the wrong as you are.”

“Still, I feel like I caused all this.” Jaemin frowns slightly. “I’m really sorry, Y/N. I just want to go back to normal.”

You smile at that. “Then let’s go back to how things were before. It sucks not being able to hang out with you like we used to.” Jaemin’s expression lights up. “Friends?”

“Friends.” Jaemin takes your extended hand and shakes it.

“I’m so happy that I have someone to hang out with besides Chenle now.” You chuckle. Jaemin shares your sudden happiness.

“Jaems? Jaems, where are you?” A very familiar voice calls out.

“Jaems?”  Chenle scoffs. “Don’t tell me whoever that is is looking for you.” He crosses his arms as Jaemin’s face suddenly reddens. Suddenly, Lee Jeno’s head pops out from around the corner.

“Jeno?” You ask, confused. Jeno’s expression looks just about as shocked as your voice. 

“Oh, Y/N, hey.” Jeno greets, awkwardly. “Jaems--I mean, Jaemin, I’m ready to leave when you are.” He coughs out in a quiet voice. 

You glance over at Chenle who is already looking at you in disbelief. Na Jaemin and Lee Jeno? Together? Strange.

“When did you two become friends?” Chenle raises an eyebrow at the pair in front of you two.

“Funny story actually,” Jaemin chuckles, slinging an arm around an uncomfortable Jeno. “After mine and Y/N’s fight, I got really upset and kind of made a scene, but Jeno calmed me down and helped me get home safely.” He explains.

You nod, still surprised at the match. Although the duo is quite strange, your mind continues to wander back to your argument with Jaemin. He looks at you with an apologetic expression. “Y/N, I really want to say sorry for what happened at the party,” He says. “I just didn’t want Donghyuck to hurt you. But I see that he’s been pretty good to you and if you’re happy, I’m happy.”

You hug Jaemin. “Jae, I’m sorry too. Can we just forget everything that happened and be best friends again?” You ask.

Chenle coughs. “Close friends. I’m the best friend, don’t forget.”

Jaemin ignores him as he hugs you back. “Of course, Y/N. I missed you.”

You feel so much better. You honestly thought you would spend your homecoming night upset about your broken friendship, but luckily you made up with Jaemin.

“Thank god you guys fixed that, I was getting stressed.” Chenle flips his hair. You chuckle before exchanging goodbyes. 

“See you guys tonight.” You waves to Jeno and Jaemin. 

“Yeah, see you guys.” Jaemin waves back. “Save me a dance, Y/N.” He smiles before turning to leave the store with his friend.  

#nct #nct 127 #nct dream #nct 2018 #nct scenarios #nct angst #nct fluff #nct 127 haechan #nct 127 donghyuck #nct dream haechan #nct dream donghyuck #lee donghyuck #donghyuck scenarios #donghyuck fluff #nct comedy #donghyuck au #nct au #boyfriend donghyuck #best friend chenle #na jaemin #zhong chenle #mark lee #lee jeno #park jisung #huang renjun #nct dream scenarios #haechan scenarios #boyfriend haechan #nct dream au

[deathbled]

💍 + averey & lenalee o vo

@lunaetis​    /    wedding meme send me 💍 + A SHIP and i’ll tell you—

where they get married

it takes place in a beautiful garden near where they first met; averey was surprisingly stubborn about that because, in his words, “where they met is where his life started” and honestly lenalee probably won’t say no to that logic (plus he probably used the puppy dog eyes, he’s not above that)

when they get married ( ie what time of day, what month and season etc. )

it’s late spring, early evening some day in mid-april, to be exact, where the trees bloom & the flowers slowly come out of their slumber. it wasn’t planned like that, per-se, but things happen and sometimes the most beautiful things take place at unexpected times.

what traditions they include ( do they get married under a chuppah and crush a glass, garter toss, ‘something borrowed, something blue,’ etc. )

i’m honestly unsure about this because i feel like while they probably would include some traditions it wouldn’t be as big a deal as for other people; maybe they both drink wine from goblets tied together with red string or, and he’s only doing it very lowkey because he’s embarrassed but where averey is from there’s the tradition of carving wooden spoons for your loved one and decorating them with things like key insignia ( to signify they have the key to your heart ) so maybe that plays a part? i’m honestly stumped with this one otherwise because i can promise you even after looking up wedding traditions i have absolutely no idea about wedding traditions :’)

or there’s the whole “testing the groom” thing kamui might’ve been involved with planning

what their wedding cake looks like

it is either incredibly cute or absolutely extravagant and even now i’m not sure if it’s a 50/50 decision vote like most things are with them or if they just play rock-paper-scissors to settle which one to go for. though if avereys “boss” gets to have a say it’s literally the most over-the-top cake and i’m screaming and laughing over this one

….who smashes cake into whose face

i want to say lenalee smashes cake into avereys cake but honestly i’m 100% convinced averey accidentally smashes cake into his own face in a moment of inattentiveness.

who proposed to who first

OKAY SO. THERE’S TWO SCENARIOS I CAN SEE.

they both did at the same time actually because it was kind of a “you know if i could i’d marry you right now” -”i’m not stopping you” situation that ended with “so we’re getting married?” but in like, during a picnic or something and it sounds a lot less cute than it was because trust me it was cute and wholesome. either that or one of them prepared to propose to the other, the other found the ring and then proposed first in a classic uno reverse card move.

or it was averey but only because he asked lenalee if it was okay and she was just so confused and like “yeS?” and then it happened and turns out this dumb nerd had everything prepared already but was just nervous so it’s not even a surprise but he’d rather ask if it’s okay for him to ask then ask at a wrong time

who walks down the aisle and who waits at the altar ( or neither )

i want to say it’s the classic thing but i’m so sure averey insisted the walk down the aisle together just because he hates the traditional view most cultures have on the bride being “given away” into another mans care so he just was as stubborn as a mule about walking with her

what their wedding dresses / suits / other look like

can i say wildcard for this one because i actually have no idea. i thought about it for thirty minutes now and i literally have no clue other than given that avereys birthplace doesn’t even really do weddings he’d just stress so much about what to wear he’d probably be annoying a little bit before he just kinda settles on “i’m going to ask the fanciest people i know but at the same time i am ready to cry how to fashion....”

what their wedding colour scheme is and what sort of decor they have

it’s definitely a more red & gold theme; the decor is perhaps one of the most traditional things & once again i am not sure what else to say other than they kept it classy but also very eye-catching??? idk 

what flowers are in the bouquet ( if applicable. bonus: what do the flowers mean? )

okay so to start off it’s not in the bouquet but averey has a sprig of thyme in his pocket for “good luck”, there’s probably red peonys in there, perhaps some pink roses, DEFINITELY at least one white carnation, and a pink hydrangea. 

the red peonys stand for love, passion, honor and respect. the pink roses symbolize gratitude, grace & joy, white carnations symbolize purity, good luck & in wedding contexts pure love. pink hydrangeas symbolize heartfelt emotion. i’m not a florist, trust me.

what their vows are ( eg poetry, traditional, improvised etc. )

they’re actually improvised! i’d get the feeling at least one of the two had vows prepared but instead went spontaneous as soon as it came to saying them out loud. actually, i can see that happening with both of them i don’t know why.

if anyone’s late to the wedding

surprisingly enough, no. nobody would dare be late. they know better than that :)

who’s in the bridal parties / groomsmen / other

oh god here comes my absolute lack of knowledge with d. gray man characters AND the fact averey has literally like 2 people he hangs out with on the regular but i think in the bridal party there’d definitely be miranda? maybe kanda because i can see him refusing to be a groomsmen but they insisted he’d be involved. if this is a verse where the princess averey was serving is healthy & they finally get to be friends without one of them constantly under the threat of death then definitely her too!!

as for groomsmen there’s probably allen, lavi, a very grumpy kamui and one of the rookie knights from avereys training.

and yes i hope it shows i have no idea how weddings are??? structured???

what their bridal party / groomsmen / other are wearing

the bridal party wears a pastel shade of pink just because they def ain’t gonna wear white or red dresses and anything else would legit just clash with the color theme.

the groomsmen all wear a simple suit because honestly all of them made suggestions and it would’ve turned into a disaster because they’re tastes are so vastly different so eventually both lenalee and averey just were like “how about,,, we keep it,,,, simple,,,”

who gives speeches at the reception ( bonus: what do they say? recount a sweet memory or two between them? tell an embarrassing story? )

well i mean, honestly? i think they both give small welcoming speeches until the others get a turn and then it’s just kamui going, allen giving a speech, avereys rookie friend whom i decided is now called lynell and uhh, a few others probably want to have a god but honestly therE’S NO TIME......

who catches the bouquet( s )

i mean i want to say a serious answer but just for shits and giggles i’m gonna say kanda.

what their wedding photos are like ( are they sweet, with the couple holding hands or kissing or ~gazing into each others eyes~? are they silly, with a snapshot of the ‘cake-smash’ moment? or are they artistic, with one of them facing the sunset or holding their bouquets? )

okay so most of them are sweet and absolutely the cutest pictures ever but there’s definitely a picture of averey accidentally cake-smashing himself so....

what sort of food they have at the reception

it’s an 8 course banquet and honestly i don’t even know what exactly it’d entail i just know they went all out and if i dwell on this ask any longer i’ll be hungry i’m so sorry i just can’t do food asks past midnight i’ll turn into a gremlin

who cries first during the ceremony

can averey cry first if he’s been crying this whole time?

how wild their reception gets ( who dances the best, who gets drunk first, etc. )

it’s a tame kind of wild; there’s a dance off and definitely some drunken shenanigans but nobody goes absolutely crazy

what their rings are like

FINALLY MY FAVORITE THING I KNOW THINGS ABOUT. averey made them himself and he’s super proud and yes it took literal months but look at them,, he tried to keep them simple but elegant so they don’t get in the way of work, too. i’m crying.

what sort of favours they have ( heart shaped sparklers, mini champagne bottles, personalised candy etc. )

uH,,, UHHHHHHHHHHHH, personalised candy probably but also most definitely mini champagne bottles if just because it fit with the theme or something---

where they go for their honeymoon

they actually travel for a while! they couldn’t decide where exactly to go so instead they just decided to pick the places they wanted to see the most and then travel there for a bit

something memorable that happens during the party / ceremony ( do they run out of ice and someone goes to get it in full formal wear on foot, does anyone fall asleep in the middle of the party, etc. )

averey not only accidentally cake smashes himself he also manages to accidentally use the cake leftovers on his hand like hairgel because he was careless and ran said hand through his hair

THEY DID manage to get it out for the most part though so it’s all good---

who officiates the ceremony

can i pick wildcard again because other than the classic “a priest” i don’t actually have anything in mind other than perhaps the bishop that took averey under his wing to help him with his curse a short time before averey and lenalee met??

what song their first dance is to

OKAY SO I THOUGHT ABOUT THIS ONE SUPER LONG but i honestly think it’d be to “for the dancing & the dreaming” if just because it’s super cute and also they’d probably sing along thank you for coming to my ted talk

who gives who away as they walk down the aisle

i mean given that they walk the aisle down together i don’t think anyone gives anyone away but if it came down to it you already know the answer

#lunaetis #you can tell how tired i got because i literally ended up writing the last five questions or so while I WAS DEAD #anyways i hate this but i tRIED #i know NOTHING. NADA. ZIP. about weddings #FJDFLKGJKDFFGJDKFDG the truth come out i live under a rock #bUT YEAH I TRIED TO MAKE IT WHOLESOME AND CUTE OK #but yeah the cake smash thing def happened because averey was so nervous he just kind of accidentally did that:tm: #* ALL OF THIS SORROW WON’T FIT IN MY CHEST ( reply )