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#if I'm going to continue to photograph my tiny books I've got to get a manicure or something
simply-sithel 3 years
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Two more of the Les Fleurs du mal books, these ones daintily bound as wee hardbacks.
One of them has a ring sewn into the headband and is very sturdy- I enjoy hanging it from my laptop while I work.
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They're both legible though the one with a ring is a later print revision also set to "fill the page" which grants it just a pinch more space. At that scale, every bit matters and it's a noticeably more pleasant experience to open/read. Remember, if you're interested in your own copy of a print, it & instructions are posted.
Love that my homemade paper is a perfect color match but boy is it brittle! Also, not sure if the top photo does it justice but they match my "rose gold" laptop so nicely!
No one seems interested in having their works typeset at that scale, alas, but I remain curious as to how prose would fit/look so I'll find something to experiment with....
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strangest-loser 4 years
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Twilight Rewrite
Fire in my Blood ~ Jasper Hale x OC ~ Book One: Chapter Five
Chapter One / Chapter Two / Chapter Three / Chapter Four
The radio sitting on Alessia's desk was set to low volume and the local all night news channel was ignored in favour of the history paper she was attempting to finish on the civil war. The computer keys tapping was giving the girl a headache and her alarm clock read 05:47 in bright red letters, it's too early for this but she has to finish this essay this morning if she wants to get any semblance of a Sunday. Her mind was fried from trying to write up all of the information contained in her APUSH textbook and she was a fraction of a second away from throwing her laptop out of her open window. Her concentration drifted for the third time that morning and while sighing she saved her word document and shut her screen off to give her brain a rest. Her eyes wandered across her room once again and she scanned the things that covered the walls, photos and memorabilia from throughout her life, at 17 she had collected a decent amount of stuff that lay tucked away in cubby holes or displayed on shelves on the walls, things were nestled in corners and they filled the drawers of the room. Her closet drew her attention and she walked towards it almost without thinking. Sliding open the door she let herself push her shoes off to one side while moving the shoeboxes that housed postcards and newspapers and tickets to football games and movies, one of them held her ribbons and certificates for cheerleading and a tiny statue gifted to her by Jacob, she quickly shoved that box aside.
It was the wooden floorboards beneath the boxes that she was interested in. The boards were discoloured and squeaked when she moved them, a minute of putting pressure on the furthest piece let it wedge free and it allowed her to pull up a second floorboard and pull an ornate box from the hole in the floor. This box had never been seen by anyone other than her and her mother, who gave it to her when she left her father. It normally hurt her to look at the box but she was tired and her emotions weren't ruling her head.
The box was oak wood coloured a deep burgundy and it was carved in the shape of a ballerina, the edges of the lid were lined with metal in a lace pattern and it met in the front to form a lock, Alessia needed the key.
Standing from her position kneeling on the floor she set down the box on her bed before walking to her desk and opening the top drawer of a small jewelry box and she let her eyes fall on a small emerald green ribbon that encircled a small black key, grabbing the tiny key she sat cross-legged on her bed and turned the key hearing a tiny click and slowly lifted the lid hearing the tiny tune of 'The Rose Adagio' from the Sleeping Beauty ballet chime throughout the room in its twinkling music box sound, and the tiny figure sitting at the top of the box spun around to the music played for her, pale glass skin with a brunette hair and a pink tutu with roses in her extended arm. This was a tiny Aurora dancing her way through her song.
The contents of the box is what Alessia was looking for, sitting at the top of the box was the only photograph Alessia had of her mother. It was taken when Alessia was four, her brown hair was held in curly pigtails and she sat with a big smile, next to her was a toddler Bella, looking up at her big sister smiling at her, Bella was sitting in their mothers lap and Ren茅e was smiling down at their youngest, that was common in almost every instance of their lives, Ren茅e's attention was almost always on Bella. It was something that caused Alessia a lot of pain when she was growing up and for a long time she told herself her mommy didn't love her because she did something wrong. Setting the photograph aside she continued to go through the box, a small necklace belonging to her grandmother was taken out too, it was a Tiffany necklace from the fifties and it was priceless to Alessia, she slipped the necklace around her neck and the added weight it put over her heart comforted her. More sentimental objects came out of the box including the first dollar she earned at the diner and a dried daisy she got in a meadow in the forest. At the bottom of the box sat a pair of black satin pointe shoes, beautiful black ballet slippers with their box in tact and their black ribbons freshly sewn in. She carefully took them out of the box and held them in her hands, turning them in her palms and observing the undamaged fabric, they haven't been used yet, they were still brand new after her accident.
A single photograph laid underneath those inky slippers. A 15 year old Alessia in a white leotard and a beautiful romantic length tutu standing in front of a wall at a competition in Seattle, she was holding a beautiful pique arabesque and she looked so regal and happy, happier than she has in a long time.
Ballet was never Bella's thing, she was chronically clumsy and she always tried to find any possible reason to skip her lessons at her school in Arizona, but to Alessia dancing was as easy as breathing. After a lot of begging at the age of 4 Alessia was enrolled in the tiny dance school that was in the middle of town just above the town newspaper and for the next 10 years Alessia worked with her teacher Madam Olivia and she grew up to dance beautifully, that Christmas she played Clara and the Sugarplum Princess in the Nutcracker, but not three months later at the end of March she was running through the woods when Sam Uley tried to rip her chest open. She hasn't danced since.
Letting her mind come away from the photograph in her hand she looked towards the window seeing it was just beginning to get light outside and she pulled her cellphone out of her pocket and sent a message to Alice.
掳Hey what are you doing right now?掳
>Nothing at the moment, why?<
掳Can you meet me outside the paper, I have something fun we can do, wear leggings!掳
>I'm on my way<
Putting her phone in her bag she changed her pajamas out for leggings and a black t-shirt and put her shoe bag into the backpack she was packing, taking the photograph and the point shoes and leaving them on her bed before locking the box back up and returning it to it's spot beneath the floorboards and turning to slide on her trainers and grab the contents of her bag and her pointe shoes, setting the photograph on her dresser next to the one of her and the Cullens and sliding out of the door and beginning to run to the studio.
Alessia would have expected to see her friend extremely angry for dragging her out of the house at 6 am if she knew that Alice actually needed to sleep, instead she saw the beautiful girl stood with her kind smile in a jacket and leggings outside of the building that housed the Forks Forum and as she sped up her run to meet her Alice gave Alessia an awkward stare, "I don't think I've ever seen you run."
Her quip was met with a half hearted punch in the shoulder as Alessia led her around the side of the building to a set of stairs and began to ascend them, most stores in town were only opening in 30 minutes so the street was dead and her and Alice seemed to be the only ones around. Alessia reached a single door that had a ballet shoe on the window glass and began to wrack her mind for the location of the school's spare key, Madame Olivia told her to use it to let herself in if she ever needed extra practice time and the memory of constantly being in that studio lead her to look at a loose brick in the side of the building, pulling it away from the wall revealed the silver key needed to unlock the door and showing it to Alice with a vocal "aha!" gained a laugh from the petite vampire.
Pushing the door open into the small reception area felt like opening a door to her childhood and she couldn't help the smile that fell on her lips, she was too busy looking around the room she didn't notice Alice standing at the small trophy case in the corner and pointing at a photograph, "Is this you?"
When Alessia came close enough to see the photo in question she laughed a really genuine laugh before nodding and smiling "Yes, I was 14 and we were doing a showcase with all of the dance schools in Washington, each school got assigned a ballet to perform a piece from and our school got Giselle, that's me in the front."
Moving away from the case she pulled Alice in past another set of doors and switched on the lights to show a familiar room full of mirrored walls and ballet barres. The next hour of their morning was spent with Alessia and Alice goofing off working through different warm up excercises and technique work. Alice, displaying that she was in fact not human anymore, had amazing strength and flexibility and with Alessia only running through everything once she was soon dancing like she had been all her life. Alessia was a little out of practice but cheer kept her fit and healthy so she soon got right back into the swing of things and their hour was some of the most fun she'd had in a long time. After their hour long session Alice began to beg her to teach her an actual routine, and Alessia caved because she knew she couldn't say no to those golden eyes. Travelling to the back storage room she saw rows upon rows of pink satin shoes, brand new, not even out of their bags yet. Grabbing a few sizes and makes she backed out of the room to size them for her friend, and while she knew realistically that Alice couldn't injure herself if her shoes fit wrong she still would want them to look right. After finding her size and showing her how to put them on, she began to sew in the ribbons while telling Alice to grab the MP3 player out of her bag. Putting the other shoes away she had Alice put of the pointe shoes and do a few more barre excercises to get used to going on pointe and trying to keep her technique correct, naturally Alice didn't need too much help before she could do it perfectly and the tiny girl moved into the centre of the floor to practice some more while Alessia lifted the beautiful black shoes out of her bag and slipped them on her feet. She still remembers when she got them, shopping in Port Angeles with her father she saw them in the window of a dance shop and with her left over money from Christmas she bought them with every intention of wearing them to class the next day, she never got the chance. Rising onto pointe was like coming home for Alessia and without realising she shed a tear before letting herself go through a few movements that she wanted to make sure she wouldn't hurt herself on, with everything in place she took the MP3 from Alice and scrolled to something familiar, walking Alice through the 'Waltz of the Snowflakes' wasn't too dificult and once Alice got the basics down they ran it twice more before Alice asked to see something Alessia could do. Her eyes fell onto the name of a familiar ballet and she pressed play letting herself fall into a series of movements that felt like second nature as the sweet flutes guided her into dancing 'Juliet's Variation' from Act 1 of Romeo and Juliet. It was always easy for Alessia to get lost in the moment of her dancing, she remembered each and every step and pirouette and pas de bouree that Madame Olivia taught her and even though she made a few mistakes being out of practice and all she still knew her musical cues and to Alice she danced ethereally. To Alice and the shadow watching from the door.
The music signalled her to pause and in her minds eye she could see the partner that wasn't there, Romeo entering the party and meeting Juliet in his disguise, before she was swept away to continue.
Coming to a halt in the centre of the room Alessia was no longer in a ballroom being caught by Paris and Tibult, she was looking at Alice and smiling widely, and she was shocked out of her thoughts by a voice at the door. "Your arms weren't strong and you were off your foot, the turns weren't perfect and you were sloppy on your leaps."
Alessia snapped around to see a familiar lithe frame wrapped up in her black dress standing in the doorway, her grey hair tucked away in a french twist. A moment passed and Madame Olivia walked towards her and let her stern face pull into a happy, kind one, "But you dance beautifully Ma Cherie I'm so glad that you are back."
Alessia returned the warm hug and let herself sag in relief, she felt good, she hasn't felt this good since she bought these shoes. Olivia turned to Alice then and continued speaking, "and what is your name child?" Alice responded in her sweet fashion and Olivia complimented her on her technique and began to make corrections again, pulling the pixi girl aside to teach her correct positions and help her with her turns, Alessia watched until Olivia snapped at her in her 'Madame voice' to get back to running the variation again, Alessia smiled and hit replay letting herself get lost once more.
Walking out of the studio and down the stairs at 11 am was like stepping back into her life for Alessia, she chatted with Alice, the two laughing and joking about the fact that Olivia was obsessed with Alice's "Natural talent" and when they turned the corner to walk back onto Main Street they were greeted with the sight of Jasper waiting by the car for them. Alessia managed to claim shotgun to sit next to the guy who was quickly becoming her favourite person while Alice sat in the middle of the back seat declaring that she at least got to choose that was playing on the radio. The idle chatter was broken by Jasper asking if Alessia wanted to play baseball with them this afternoon. "I mean sure but there is gonna be a thunderstorm you know, but hey, lead me to my doom why don't you." The laughter she pulled out of both siblings made her own smile widen, she was having such a good day today.
With the car pulling into her driveway she got out and let Jasper know she would catch a ride with Bella and Edward as much as she really didn't want to be stuck in a car with all of that sexual tension, she hadn't spent much time with her sister recently and she wanted to at least check in with her.
The click of the front door closing and the sound of her bag hitting the floor is what prompted Charlie Swan to race into the living room to see his oldest daughter watching South Park reruns while eating rice cakes and he almost had a heart attack for the second time today. "You can't just show up out of no where after disappearing all morning and give me no warning Alessia, I thought something happened!" His voice cracked under the stress, "Where even were you?!"
Alessia muted the TV before walking up to him and patting his shoulder before pointing to the kitchen table where her pointe shoes sat, worn with the mornings activities. Charlie didn't give off too much of a reaction but she could see the worry in his eyes dissolve into pride and joy. After the accident Alessia's depression and grief over what had happened caused her to completely abandon ballet. When she moved on to her freshman year of highschool she joined the cheer team to keep herself busy and hopefully keep her mind occupied. It was so bad that Alessia made Charlie take down every ballet photograph of Alessia he had. The fact that she was dancing again made his relieved and happy. Alessia smiled at her dad's happy face while he pulled her into a tight hug, the type of dad hug that couldn't help but make you feel safe and cared for, whatever Ren茅e had against her father Alessia has been getting these hugs all her life, and she couldn't remember the last time her mother called to talk to her.
A shower was well deserved after her active morning, she hasn't used the muscles she used today in over two years and she knew that if she didn't ice her body she was going to be seriously crippled in the morning, after a hot shower to wash away the sweat and clean her hair she filled the bath her with freezing cold water and sat in it for 30 minutes, she definitely didn't miss this.
Her earlier clothes were swapped out for a Washington State Cougars t-shirt, leggings and her addidas superstars and she braided her hair to keep it out of her eyes, hearing a beep from outside bad her meeting Bella on the stairs and grabbing her hand as she passed Charlie with a kiss on his cheek and the two sisters sat in the car of Edward Cullen as he drove them off to the field where the rest of the Cullens were waiting.
The clouds were rolling dark as they pulled up to a clearing and by the time the car stopped Alessia was already out of the car and sprinting towards the Cullen's who stood on their DIY baseball court. Jasper caught the girl by her legs when she jumped on his back and him preteding to fall over caused Alessia to scream and start laughing, he eventually put her down after swinging her around a bit until she leaned over his back and whispered in his ear "Please put me down sugar." He pushed her shoulder and she stuck her tongue out before walking over to Esme to get her scheduled 'momma hug'. Esme pulled away slightly before wrapping her arm around her shoulder and walking a ways away from the group with her.
"You make him happy you know, you bring this whole family joy but Jasper especially. You know the day they met you in school he came home and pulled me aside and told me about the pretty girl in his history class. They might be hundreds of years old but all of my boys are the same, they go to Carlisle for advice about important decisions and morality, but anything to do with love, or feelings or anything like that they all know to talk to their mother." Esme told Alessia with a smile that only a mother could have. "If you don't mind me asking Esme, how did you all come to be a family?" Alessia asked looking into the amber eyes of the kind woman before her, who took her by the hand as the baseball game began and lead her to a fallen tree branch to the left of the field. Esme sat down on the branch fully expecting Alessia to sit down beside her but she was surprised when the brunette sat on the ground with her eyes looking up expectantly, like a child waiting to be told a story. The thought made Esme smile because she knew all too well what had happened to the girl. She remembered the night her husband came home after an excruciating surgery talking about how he had to stitch a little girl back together after their warewolf rivals ripped through her. Vampires couldn't cry, because they were not alive anymore, but Esme had never seen Carlisle more broken than the night he sat down and told her about the tiny little human they almost lost, but who despite all odds decided to survive and who would go on to make a full recovery. They decided as a pair to watch over the child and placed her under the covens protection because they knew she was special, her blood had no scent and Alice could see her future, and it was one the Cullens would be involved in. The fact that all of the pain Alessia suffered wasn't enough to break her and that she was still able to hold some of her childish nature made Esme happy to see.
Esme launched into the tale of the basics of their covens formation while Alessia listened intently. "Carlisle was the first one turned, in 1663. He knew he couldn't stay in London so he moved around perfecting his self control around human blood and his compassion for human life is the reason we drink animal blood instead of human. He turned almost every single person in this family, first was Edward." Esme felt a head lean against her leg and she looked down to see Alessia staring up at her with absolute fascination and her undivided attention, Esme continued. "After a while Edward left Carlisle to travel and be alone, that's when I met him, back in 1911, I was 16." She smiled fondly at the memory, "he changed me in 1921 when I was dying in the hospital, he remembered me and decided he couldn't let me die, so he changed me. We married some time later.
The next one changed was Rosalie, Carlisle found her beaten and bleeding in the streets and saved her life in 1933 and she found Emmet and Carlisle saved his life two years later.
The only ones Carlisle didn't change himself were Alice and Jasper, they found each other, then joined us in 1950, and now we live in Forks Washington, where we met you and now we are playing baseball." Esme finished with a smile looking down at the girl who was processing all of that information with her brow creased and a small smile on her face. Esme started to run her fingers through the brown locks when Alessia spoke up in a quiet laugh, "Wow, you guys are like, super old." The two began to laugh when suddenly the atmosphere changed and Alice calls for the game to be over, clearly sensing something was wrong by the look on her face. Esme grabbed Alessia and moved her back to the group at a speed that quite frankly gave her a headache and the first person to greet her was Jasper who held onto her protectively while the others fussed over Bella trying to mask her scent. Jasper could feel Alessia's sudden confusion and panic before he whispered in her ear. "There are other vampires trespassing on our lands, you don't have any scent so just stay calm and act normal, you'll be fine," he lifted her eyes to meet his honeyed ones before leaning his forehead on her own, "Gotta be brave darlin' I'll protect you till the end of time."
The nod than Alessia gave was only enough to let her stand wrapped in Jasper's hold and she began to feel like she could pull this off, slowing her heartbeat with deep breaths long enough to walk into a better formation with the vampires hiding Bella, she could fake their confidence if it was her life on the line.
The clearing they were in was quickly occupied by three strangers, two men and a woman who began talking to the Cullens before Carlisle announced that they could play because three of their players were leaving. This cue prompted Alessia to look up at the trio in front of her and find out just what exactly has everyone so spooked.
The three strangers had approached the group, two men and a woman, all of them had that inhuman beauty that the Cullens possessed but there was something different that Alessia couldn't put her finger on. The air was tense and it made her feel a fear she wasn't used to. Jasper seemed to joke with the female of the group while giving Alessia a look to say 'move over to where Edward and your sister are'. She remembered what he had said about staying calm so while trying to keep from shaking she looked towards the three intruders who she found were now looking directly at her, she greeted their stares with a confident smile and reached up to wrap her arms around Jasper's neck. She would absolutely not remember what was about to happen in the next thirty seconds but she panicked and this was how she thought to make it seem plausible that she was in fact with the Cullens not just an afternoon snack.
She really wasn't thinking anymore but ice cold lips on her own wasn't nearly as bad as she had thought, and she could only thank the stars that Jasper wasn't as much of an idiot as some other boys are because a possessive arm slid around her waist and the kiss deepened letting her fall into the feeling and relax enough to actually let her mind register that she was kissing Jasper...
HOLY SHIT SHE WAS KISSING JASPER.
At least one of the two of them was still keeping their head in the situation because Jasper pulled himself away and made a clear sign of lightly bumping his nose with her own affectionately, "go" he whispered to her before she looked back at her audience to see the darker skinned man had lost interest and the pale one was now staring at Edward, but the girl, with her firey hair and crimson eyes, her gaze was locked on Alessia as the girl walked to her sister. Chaos erupted as Alessia's back was turned and before she knew it the three strangers were speaking about the Cullens keeping human pets. We so much for being stealthy.
It wasn't until after Carlisle managed to get the intruders to leave that Alessia's legs seemed to be replaced with jello and she fell to the ground hitting her palm on a sharp stone. Emmet was the one who lifted her up and put her her in the car with Bella and Edward before the three of them sped off back towards town, the look on Edwards face was enough to tell Alessia that there genuinely was a reason to panic now as there were absolutely three vampires chasing them but the adrenaline in her bloodstream and the thought in the fore front of her mind telling her that she was the big sister and that she needed to be brave to protect Bella didn't let her lose her cool. She was brought back to reality by Bella shaking her and pointing down at her hand. "Is that blood!?"
Alessia looked down to see that sharp rock had in fact sliced into her hand and now rich streams of blood were streaming down her fingers, but apparently Alessia left all her smart ideas back in Jasper's mouth because the only answer that came to her mind was "No?"
Bella exploded at her dumbass answer "That's not something you can answer with another question!"
"Bells listen it's fine my blood doesn't affect boy toy in the front seat okay so chill out."
Edward took the chance to pipe in at that point "Maybe so but I can still hear you talking about it so focus, you both are in danger, James is a hunter so he will be after you both and he won't stop until he gets you, we have to get you are far away from forks as possible."
Alessia hated this plan but quite frankly she didn't have much of a choice. The idea of leaving her dad was heartbreaking to her but she would do anything to keep him safe. She ran into the house after Bella and while her younger sister ran up the stairs to pack ranting and raving about needing to leave, Alessia looked at her dad's confused and distraught face and told him that she would follow Bella and talk some sense into her, that she was taking Alice's car and that she would be back with Bella soon. She grabbed some bandages from the kitchen and sloppily wrapped up her hand and ran back out the door giving her father a kiss and telling him she loved him, she didn't know when she would get to see him again. Edward and Bella sat in his car when she jumped in just in time to see Charlie run out after them through the rearview mirror as they drove away to the Cullen's house. Thoroughly heartbroken she glared at Edward through the mirror and asked him "Was that really necessary?" He only nodded and said that if Alessia wanted to keep Charlie safe that she had to leave because not only was James after Alessia, the woman Victoria was too.
Pulling up to the Cullen's house the first person to greet Alessia was Jasper who grabbed her arms before looking her over for any injuries, his eyes narrowing when they landed on her wrapped hand. She promised him she was fine and before any more words could be exchanged between them she was handing Rosalie her clothes and being bundled into the back of Alice's car with her sister as it pulled away from the house and set off towards Phoenix Arizona. As much as Alessia loved road trips she had never been on one that caused her to look over her shoulder every 5 minutes because there were homicidal vampires trying to drain her like their own personal bloodbag. The ride was quiet and feeling the same comforting feeling she looked towards the driver's seat to see Jasper focusing on the road ahead of him, but she knew he was trying to help, to look after her. His calm settled over her and Bella like a weighted blanket and Alessia fell asleep for most of the trip.
She dreamed about the blonde boy she had come to care about, and it was a wonderful dream. A dream that was interrupted by scratching of a pencil on paper and Alice having what looked like some sort of fit, fully awake now and kind of scared she realised that they were in their Phoenix hotel room and Alice was drawing something. Once the fit ceased the drawing was of the incredibly familiar ballet school that was home to Alessia on the summers that she visited her mom. After Alice, Jasper and Bella left the room for a reason Alessia wasn't paying attention to the hotel room phone rang and in true horror movie fashion the only remaining member of the group answered it...
Incredibly familiar music filled her ears as Juliet's Variation played through the speaker, which was weird but when her mother's voice called over it, calling for Alessia her blood ran cold and she dropped the phone on the floor. Without thinking about this situation she flew through the door and booked it down the service stairwell in the back of the building, the Arizona heat was melting her brain but she kept running, the studio wasn't far and if she ran she could save her mother.
The lights weren't on but she could still hear the happy tune floating through the building. Walking into the main ballroom she looked around to try and find her mother, but seeing no one there she switched her attention to where the music was coming from.
It didn't take long.
But by then it was too late.
Hearing the piece draw to a close her memory told her mind that when the last note hit she should see Romeo standing before her.
But all she saw was an empty room.
And as the music came to its abrupt end...
The burning in her arm caused her to let out a gut wrenching scream. The fire in her lungs and her head and her veins called her legs to give out, and her head to hit the floor,
And her heart to stop.
~ A/N ~
Oh my god that was long 馃槀
Anyway here's a link to Juliet's Variation so you can see the dance for yourself.
https://youtu.be/6awUwiWAtnI
youtube
And I hope you enjoyed!
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seatosomert 3 years
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Its been a while.....
Hey there. So yes, it's been a while since I last posted.
So what have I been doing?
Quite a bit actually. Covid 19 restrictions have taken their toll on everyone l varying degrees.
I have been determined however to continue create images whilst sticking to the law and Covid regs.
It would have been easier to have given in and just done as little as possible. I can't though. Its not within my character.
I've always had a sense of adventure and get up and go. My Dad was the same at one time and he rubbed off on me.
So I've continued to train, despite one or two physical set backs with little injuries and stuff here and there.
I've learned to jump rope. Explorer the lesser walked areas of my neighbourhood and local woodlands and trails.
I bought a modestly priced mountain bike and started up with that again.
I'm currently learning to speed read and enhance retention of information.
I bought a second hand electric guitar and was gifted an amp for it so I'm learning that too.
I've started to write a short book.
Coached a lad at work with his photography.
Had one trip to the Lake District in the summer (when restrictions allowed) with my beautiful wife for our wedding anniversary. Got some great images whilst up there too.
I had a trip to London with my youngest lad and took an adrenaline filled trip on the Thames Rocket boat in July. I highly recommend that by the way. It was awesome!
I sat some exams at work (and failed them by a few percent) but hey, I gave it a go and learned some new shit in the process.
I bought a new camera, the Fujifilm XE3 and learned how to create my own film simulation recipes.
Connected with professional photographers at the top of their game.
I've mentored others to help them realise and start using their full potential.
I've started learning how to create my own podcast (watch this space for that guys) which will be looking at adventurers and photographers.
I've helped my son with his home schooling during the school closures.
Taught both of my sons some Photography skills. Gotten back into Bushcraft after a year or two lay off, so I'm getting into the outdoors.
And after almost a full year of no business activity, I shot a wedding just a few days ago and I'm just in the editing phase to finish them off.
Finally, I just agreed to coach a guy with his Photography for a few months as a business client.
In and amongst all this, I've found quality time with my wife and boys. Had a little time to myself to meditate, do some yoga and get out into nature where restrictions have allowed.
I have a full time job also! When I review this year, yes I want to moan about the impact of Covid on my extended family relationships, my business and it's restrictions on my personal projects (that have mostly gone onto the back burner). Yet I have to say that on reflection, in light of all the obstacles and challenges that have been in the way, I've done a lot. I mean A LOT!
Its when I reflect in this way, right now that I am actually quite proud of myself for doing the best that I could. For not giving up.
For supporting others and for loving my family and close friends in the little ways I know I have.
2020 has been unprecedented and has been challenging to say the least. Yet I feel I can finish this year and head into the next, satisfied in the knowledge that I did my best. It was not easy. But the effort was sure worth it.
Thank you all for your continued support on this Feed. Just by following and viewing you help to drive me on and if even a tiny bit of my rambling gives you all a little enjoyment, information or images you enjoy browsing, then my job is done.
Enjoy the rest of Christmas and have a most wonderful and prosperous New Year.
I'll try not to leave it as long to post next time.
Much love.
Neil 馃槉鉂わ笍
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memesiders 4 years
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Part 1
Death x OC Office AU
(I'm still obsessed with the Office AU created by @notesz-b so I started writing a little something. It's not the best but I'm proud of it so yeah... Any suggestions for a title or critiques are welcome. Just please be gentle lol)
My eyes flicked to the clock on the wall for what felt like the hundredth time in the past forty five minutes. How much longer would I have to wait? It wasn't like there were a bunch of people here; when I'd arrived there had only been three people in the waiting area. Now, only I remained. Well, me and the woman sitting behind her desk, tapping away at her keyboard. Amber, I think her name was. I flicked my eyes down to her, admiring her long platinum hair that was pulled into a tight ponytail.
Very Ariana Grande of her. Did she get migraines often from the strain on her scalp?
She looked up at me suddenly, cool eyes studying me while one of her perfect brows arched curiously. I smiled awkwardly, embarrassed by being caught for looking too long. She let out a long breath and picked up the phone on the desk, putting it to her ear and hitting a button. My smile dropped and I looked away quickly, nervously tugging at the few loose strands of hair that fell into my face.
"Hello, sir," Amber said, breaking the silence. "Yes, still here..." I cut my eyes back to her. "Yes... Okay. Do you want me to tell her to leave?" My heart dropped into my stomach. Oh no, I was not going to leave here without getting my interview. I shot up and adjusted my bag, walking over to her desk. She hung up as I reached it and turned to me. "I'm sorry, but we have to reschedule your interview. Something's come up and-"
"I need this interview," I cut in, feeling slight guilt at interrupting her. "Please, I really, really need this interview. I've been waiting for almost an hour and-"
"I apologize." Her voice was louder and less kind than it had been. "But the boss is not up to interviewing any potential-"
"Oh, fuck that," I muttered under my breath, walking to the two large office doors. Amber yelled at me to stop but I ignored her, grabbing one of the sleek handles and twisting it. Something hard hit my back and I fell forward, the door swinging open. All I could do was yelp before my face hit the ground and I was being subdued by Office Barbie. I grunted and struggled against her, kicking my legs and swinging back to try and hit her. She grabbed my arm and twisted it behind my back. I hissed at the action and tried to pull my arm free to no avail; how could someone so tiny be so strong?
"Amber, enough," a deep voice ordered. The weight on top of me disappeared seconds after the command and I pushed myself onto my knees, hugging my throbbing arm to my chest. I glared up at the woman who wasn't even looking at me.
"Should I remove her from the premises, sir?" she asked, the expression on her face clearly saying she wanted the speaker to say yes.
"That won't be necessary," the man sighed. He sounded tired, exhausted even. I turned my head to look at the speaker, my breath escaping me. There was something about him that was almost ethereal. I couldn't tell if it was the pale skin, the long raven hair, or the eyes that seemed to burn like hot embers. Maybe it was none of that and was, instead, the muscles that flexed under the dark suit he wore. One thing was for certain though; he wasn't human.
He wasn't an angel either, nor a demon, the lack of wings proved that. I could practically hear my older sister yelling at me what he was. I should've paid attention to what she told me. Something about ancient beings and being the last of their kind or something like that. Fuck, why hadn't I paid attention?
He cleared his throat and I jumped, shaking off the cloud that had formed around me. I shakily got to my feet and brushed off my skirt and tights, combing a quick hand through my hair. He lazily waved his hand and Amber moved from my side, leaving the room and closing the door behind her. Goosebumps rose on my arms as I realized I was now alone with him, and that my first impression was probably the worst that could've happened. "Well?" I jumped again, noting the irritation in his voice. I stared at him with wide eyes, afraid to move for some reason.
He rolled his eyes and sat up straight in his chair, clasping his hands together. "You barge into my office for an interview I canceled and now you have nothing to say?" I made a strangled sound and squeezed the strap of my bag tightly.
"I- I'm, uh, I'm sorry," I managed to choke out, wishing I'd just left instead of bulldozing my way forward. Death scoffed and rubbed his temples, a vein in his neck popping out as he clenched his jaw. I had to do this right before he changed his mind and had Amber throw me out on my ass. I took a deep breath and squared my shoulders, walking over to his desk with confidence I could only fake at the moment.
"My name is Aziza Banks," I said, offering him my hand. He stared at it for a good minute before finally taking it. We shook and I couldn't help but notice how large his hand was compared to mine, and how cold his skin felt against my palm. I nearly yanked my hand away from the icy touch. He gestured for me to take a seat and I nodded in appreciation, sitting down in one of the nice leather chairs and setting my bag in the other. I pulled out my resum茅 and placed it in the dark desk, sliding it across to him. "I'm here about the part time receptionist opening."
He nodded but made no move to pick up my resum茅. I shifted nervously and took a deep breath, fighting the urge to bounce my leg. I did that whenever I was anxious, and it was taking everything in my to not give in. "What are your qualifications? Experience?"
"If you look inside you'll find-"
"I want to hear them from you." I bit my tongue, holding back the string of curses I wanted to throw his way. He had made me wait an hour, tried to cancel the interview, and now he wanted me to tell him what was so easily accessible to him? God, what a prick.
"It's in my resum茅, which I thought you read," I said calmly, adding a bite to my words. The corner of his mouth twitched slightly and he grabbed the folder, flipping through it without looking at it. Instead, he stared at a small bird statue on his desk. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he looked through the file.
"Twenty Four, graduated with a bachelor's in art & design." He snorted quietly and continued down, one of his brows arching. "What is this?" He held up a photograph and I knew my face was redder than a tomato. It was a photo of my younger sister and I wearing fedoras and flipping off the camera. I had my tongue sticking out. Oh God.
"Goddammit, Neema," I muttered under my breath, covering my face with a hand. "I'm so sorry; I think my little sister slipped it in. She's always playing jokes and trying to embarrass me." I dropped my hand and sighed. "I am so, so sorry." He gave me what seemed like a sympathetic look and tucked the picture back into the folder.
"Siblings can be... irritating," he replied, squinting his eyes slightly as he continued to look through my file.
"That's putting it mildly." The corner of his mouth twitched slightly and I fought back a small smile of my own. Silence fell over us after that. I turned my attention to the room we were in, studying everything. There was a couch and a few chairs in one of the corners of the large office, a coffee table in the center of the circle of furniture. Two plants rested in different corners and two large ornate scythes were displayed on a wall, one crossing over the other. Shelves hung on a different wall with books stacked neatly on them and a picture frame with four people in it.
I couldn't make them all out from where I was sitting but I was almost certain the one on the inner left was Death. Underneath The shelves was a bar with a mini fridge and crystal glasses neatly displayed on the countertop. The office, for how large it was, was mostly bare; the man was definitely a minimalist.
I finished looking around and finally turned my attention back to Death, who had been watching me. For how long, I didn't know, but I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw those amber eyes staring at me. I straightened up and gave him a small smile, nodding at my resum茅. "There anything else you'd like to know that isn't in there?" I asked politely. He closed the folder and slid it back to me, shaking his head.
"No, thank you." He cleared his throat and clasped his hands together. "I'm sorry, Miss Banks, but I don't think you'd be a right fit." My heart sank and I completely deflated, shoulders dropping.
"What? Why not?" I asked, sounding more pathetic than I'd meant to. Death shrugged.
"I don't see anything in your resum茅 that suggest that you'd be right for the job. Your degree is in arts & design, not business, communications, or anything that could be useful to my office." I opened my mouth to speak but he continued. "I'm interested in people who can contribute something valuable to me and the company; you have nothing to offer. I'm sorry for wasting your time, have a nice day." With that, he turned his attention to his computer screen. Something started to bubble inside of me, something hot and anxious. I was mad- no, pissed. How could I not be a good fit? How could I not have something valuable to contribute? I could definitely contribute patience; that was evident by the hour I waited outside his fucking office. I slammed my hands down on his desk and stood, scoffing loudly. He looked back at me.
"Are you serious right now?" I laughed, but it wasn't because I was amused. "I spent a chunk of my time in your waiting room while you were in here doing God knows what, only getting a meeting with you after running past and being taken down by your attack dog, only so you can turn me down because you think I can't contribute anything to the office? That I'm not a valuable asset or have something worthy for you?" The bubbling had turned into a fire in the pit of my stomach and I could feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes. Fuck, why did I always cry when I was pissed off? "That's absolute bullshit!" Death regarded me coolly and stood, now towering over me. He was well over 6'0, that was for sure, because I was about that height and I seemed tiny now in comparison. His height didn't discourage me though; I was too angry for that.
"Honestly, you're not making the situation any better for yourself," he replied calmly, as if we were both having a normal conversation. "Do you think you deserve a job here because I made you wait? Or maybe because you got past my 'attack dog'?" I blinked, taken aback.
"Wha- No, of course not!" He was really pissing me off now. He leaned down to me, his face nearly touching mine. I could smell a hint of alcohol on his breath, and something else I couldn't quite place.
"Then why?" Death asked, voice low. He was trying to intimidate me, I knew it. He wasn't going to get that satisfaction; no one ever had and no one ever would. I rocked forward onto my toes, pushing myself up so that our noses brushed. The loose strands of his hair brushed against my cheek, tickling my skin and catching my eyelashes.
"Because I'm qualified and I'm pretty sure I'm the only applicant who hasn't bailed on you because of how long you avoided them," I answered, my voice unable to stay calm. "I can take anything you throw at me and get it done perfectly. I busted my ass getting here and if you give me a chance, I'll show you that I deserve to be here. That I have something of value to bring to the table." Silence fell back over us, our eyes locked in a silent battle. I wasn't about to back down, and I knew he definitely wouldn't; he didn't seem like the type of man to back down from a fight.
I heard a light knock on the door, followed by the sound of it being opened, but my gaze never wavered. "Sir," I heard Amber say. "You brother is waiting for you." Death's eyes burned holes into me but I didn't dare look away. Angels and demons had had their fair share of trying to intimidate me and had failed, this guy wouldn't be the first to break me.
"Which one?" he growled, refusing to drop eye contact. There was a loud bang and I couldn't help but jump and subsequently look over my shoulder. Standing next to Amber was a man about the same height as Death, with dark skin and disheveled hair that fell back over his head and ended in little spikes. It reminded me of a character in some anime Neema tried getting me to watch.
"Brother," he exclaimed, a shit eating grin on his face. "Good to see you!" Death groaned and fell back into his seat.
"Strife," he muttered. Strife sauntered in, holding his arms out.
"I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd drop by just to say hi, maybe catch up."
"You live on the other side of town!" I looked between them, suddenly feeling awkward. Death dragged a hand down his face and stared at his brother, the bags under his eyes seeming to deepen. "What do you really want?" Strife clutched his heart and frowned.
"Why, big brother, what do you mean? Can't I just be here for a nice visit with my sibling?"
"No," he replied before Strife could even finish.
"Should I remove him from the premises, sir?" Amber asked, cracking her knuckles. Death and Strife stared at each other, Strife's eyes hidden behind a pair of dark sunglasses. The building tension in the room made me want to shiver, but instead I fell back into my seat just as Death answered,
"No, thank you, Amber. It'll be fine." She nodded and left, closing the door behind her, but not before casting me a curious glance. Strife continued over and pulled back a chair, sweeping my bag off of the seat without a care to ask me to move it. My purse hit the floor, contents spilling out all over. I sucked in a sharp breath and glared at the man as he plopped down, ignoring me completely.
"Nice manners, asshole," I muttered, scooting out of my seat to pick up my things. I grabbed the dumped items- gum, a pen, my wallet, and an empty candy bar wrapper- and tossed the items back into my bag. As I went to pick it up, a boot came down on the purse strap. I snapped my head up, scowling at him. He smirked and reached for his sunglasses, tipping them up slightly to reveal two intense yellow eyes. My breath hitched in my throat at the sight of them; absolutely beautiful.
"Do you know who I am, little girl?" he asked, his tone vaguely threatening. I frowned, yanking the purse strap out from under his boot.
"Yeah," I said, settling back into my seat. "You're the biggest asshole in the city; nice to finally meet you." He stared at me for a few seconds and I wondered if, perhaps, I should have kept my mouth shut. After all, this was the brother of the man I was trying to get to hire me, and he was pretty important himself. He let his glasses fall back over his eyes and, to my surprise, started to laugh. He tipped his head back as he snickered, his body shaking from the laughter. My frown deepened as I watched him; this was definitely not what I'd expected.
"Oh, Creator, that was good," he wheezed out after a few more moments of giggling. He looked to his brother. "Death, where did you find this one? Can I have her?"
"She's not mine," Death hissed, sitting back and rubbing his temples.
"Yes I am," I snapped. I wasn't about to leave here after waiting for an hour without a job.
"Really," Strife sang, turning his attention to me. He leaned on the arm of his chair, resting his chin on his fist as he regarded me. "So how long have you been banging my brother?" My eyes widened at his question. What? I wasn't- how did he think- "He never told me he had a lovely little human on his arm."
"Strife," Death growled, getting no reaction from his sibling other than a smirk.
"I'm not his like that!" I finally sputtered out. My face was warm and I could only imagine how red my cheeks were. "I just meant-"
"You're not mine in any way, shape, or form!" I shot a glare at Death, ready to enter another round of arguing with him, when Strife cut in.
"If he's not gonna give you a job, I'll happily take you in," he purred, a mischievous grin on his face. I rolled my eyes at his offer and sighed, shaking my head.
"You'll do no such thing," Death stated, narrowing his eyes at the other man. Strife's grin only grew and he turned to his brother.
"You're not the boss of either of us, big brother. I'd be more than welcome to take the little human in." The two stared at each other silently, the tension in the air only growing. I was sure one of them was going to throw the first punch at any minute. Suddenly, Death spoke.
"Amber!" In less than five seconds the blonde was at the door, her eyes trained on Strife like a guard dog waiting for her owner to give the command. "Please, escort Miss Banks out of my office. I need to speak to my brother, alone." I frowned, my hands curling into fists.
"What?" I spat, glaring at him. "No, we're not finished here!" He met my gaze and the air around me seemed to chill. I wanted to recoil, but I couldn't back down.
"Yes, I believe we are. I am sorry, Miss Banks, but you do not have the job." I stood quickly, nearly knocking back the chair, and slammed my hands down on the desk.
"No, I'm not leaving. You can't just-"
"Please come with me or else I'll have to use force," Amber said, appearing next to me. I disregarded her.
"I came here for a job and I'm not leaving until I get one, you pompous, stuck up ba-" Before I could finish tearing him a new one, Amber had my arm twisted behind my back and was pushing me to the exit, my bag in her hand. "Wait!"
"Have a nice day, Miss Banks," Death called as I was shoved out. I tossed a glance over my shoulder and I could've sworn I saw a smirk on his face. Son of a bitch. Amber didn't let go of me until I was in the elevator.
"I'm sorry the interview didn't go your way," she said, sounding and looking sincere. "Don't take what he said personally; he's is in a mood today. Something to do with his siblings, I'd assume." The anger seemes to drain out of me as she talked, not because I felt bad for the guy, but because the reality of what had just happened was settling in. I suddenly felt ashamed of myself; my actions weren't something I was entirely proud of. I'd never been so upset by an interview before. I'd had plenty of them, and had been turned down more times than I cared to admit, so why had I lost it at this one? Maybe it was the looming reminder of failure hanging over me. Whatever it was, it was inexcusable of me to behave like that. I almost felt like I owed Death an apology.
Almost.
"It's alright," I sighed, running a hand through my hair. I took my bag from her hand, my frown deepening. "I shouldn't have behaved like a crazy bitch. That probably didn't help my case." Amber cracked a small smile and nodded, stepping back. I hit the lobby button and leaned against the elevator wall. "It was nice meeting you, Amber."
"Same to you, Aziza," she replied as the elevator doors came to a close. I let my head fall back and sighed, closing my eyes as tears started to build.
What a fucking failure.
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