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lumagarden · 14 days

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DRAGONS RISING S2 P1 SPOILERS UNDER CUT

my thoughts per ep :3!!

ngl thisbisbjust me live typing my reaction but wtv!! also cw for lots of colorful language hehe

ep 1

- THE SILLIES!!!! also riyu is huge??:?2);

- lloyd is so cute when hes eepy

- “maybe you outa crawl into your crib for a nap buddy” WAHHHHHHHH

-lloyds nightmares omfggg poor thing

- SORA OMG NO WONDER HE COULDNT SLEEP theyre visions right

- spinjitsu-ing out of his nightmare to move out of the way and save his children can someone put me out of my misery

- “my nightmares are getting worse uncle” NOOOOOO

- OH MY GOD ARIN AND LLOYD NIGHTMARE TALK WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

- arin imitating wu i xant

- cinder?,

- LLOYDSD

- ???? ok

ep 2

- new intro sooo good fr WHO TAUGHT CINDER SPINJITSU DOE

- resistance kills

- xan percival be rhe new emperor (is 12 years old)

- OH??

- poor lloyd :(

- Frohicky serving swamp ass fr

-WILDFYRE

- lloyd acknowledging his panic attack someone let me out of my cage

- wait so wildfyre and kai dont have the same power right

- HELEODOSJFNS HIM BUEPING UP THE FLY

- ????

- the sillies!!

- arin cannot be mean im sorry

- HELP “i really didnt think a human could dance like that!”

- arins voice is so non-threatening hes so baby

- “i dont know anything about that” “cool :) thanks for your time!” HELEODOS

- arins so gullible i love him !!! (if he gets the lloyd treatment i MIGHT jump off a cliff)

- “wow. im really bad at spotting liars :,)”

- sora being rebellious :000 !!

- lloyd and arin i cnt .

- ZERO CATS DETECTED IN THIS IMAGEJFKEJFJ

- LMFAOOOOO LLOYD

- why r they just standing there omfg ☠️

- whoa. what if jay hits the gong OH MY FOD!!!!!! (it will not happen im delusional and just want evil jay)

- no causw wait now i think itll happen

- WHOS KNOXKING

- PERCIVAL AND ARIN<333

- wait so do the gongs power like is it permanent or no

- wait my stupid ass-cinders not that one twitchy guy right.

- percival!!!!!! fav side character

- “how can a language look evil” “trust me it does”

- alright what the flip

- WAIT LORD RAS CUESED THW WORMS.. my stupid ass how did i not realize this

- WAITTT FORBIDDEN FIVE… (doesnt know what hes talking about)

- is cinder one of the forbidden five

- wait no im srupid

- Ok.

- LLOYD HAVING A PANIC ATTACK NOOOOOOOOO MY BABY :((((((((((

- acrually theowing up at him like panicking oh mymgod oh kymgod

- “whoever you are” HELPPP

- uh oh chat

- what if one of the ppl w wolf masks is jay

- NOOOO NYA AND LLOYD I CANT DOT HIS . throwing up

- “then just use spinjitsu-oh right sorry” My god

- literally what will happen if u hit the gong that many times

- “u know i thrashed the last one right” NO WAYY

- succeeded.. (?)

- CHAT

- can i learn shatterspin please!!

- whoa like actually this is so cool im sorry

- lloyd frm the trailer!!

- NOOO WILDFYRE

- “wildfyres hurt bad” im crying

- oh my god one of them is going to turn evil to help save thwm. thats whats gnna happen ik it

- Wheres cole.

ep 3!!

- what r u training for clearly ur alreasy powerful

- is cinder into-oh nvm

- kai getting angry.. i missed this

- can someone translate wus notes

- arin :(

- poor lloyd i cnt

- dude kai with gis like wings or something QHAT IS RHAT IM SO EXCITED

- lloyd plz

- Huh

- WHAT THE FLIP??

- who voices the life symbol

- strwngrh is coles :,3

- id be like hello??? IM RIGHT HERE??

- why r they arguing right in front of him

- K see that did not help

- lloyd is going through Way toocmuch and its ep 3

- oh my god. kai and wildfyre can aomeone throw me off a cliff please

- the boringest :(((

- what the flip

- frohicky x zane is kinda cute sorry

- :(( kai !!! i xant

- breaking my silence. jordana x cinder anyone

- oh theyre actually so evil

- lloye sleeping hes so cute

- WAHHH ivlove rhsm

- “what about the younger ones” sobs

- UM WHO WENT ON BOARD

- WILDFYRE.

- U R NOT ALL BETTER I CNT

- soras lil story :(

- how Did she get out

- oh trueee. but the source dragons were basically telling him to find them so.

- lloyd with a grabber thing omfg theyre having sm fun

- “no offense buddy” HDKWJDKSK

- “WHOS HE TALKIMG ABT” HEKDOSKD

- alright what the flip

- have i ever mentioned how much i love nyas beauty mark . i have a lego figurine of her n the beauty mark makes me emotional

- arin n sora :,(

- i love these new suits!! but dragon rising s1 still fave

- waittt what isbgoing on

- WAIT

- WAITTTTTT I SAW THIS SCENE AS A SPOILER

- arin and his parsnts i cnt do it.

- “what, no? i love you i miss you” Kill me.

- Ohh no i sont like this

- oh my god lloyds is going to break me

- No. no. Why would you do this.

- “i blame myself nephew” no No!!!

- NOOOOOOOO OH MY GOD

- JAYA OH MYGOD THIS IS THE PART THAT I GOT SPOILED FOE

- OH KYMGOD NOOOOO

- nya is so. smart i cant. n the way she knew it wasnt happening . Even tho thats wuite literally what will happen if he finds her

- this is like that visionary ninjago fic

- what did kai see..

- “i know the real jay couldnt forget me” It might seem crazy what im bout to say….

- WHAT DID KAI SEE!!!! (i say louder)

- kai literally jumping off

- HELP??

- “i knew he was fine” U DID NOT

- ok now what

- watch the teachwr be like . oh nvm

- Thwyre cooked

ep 4

- OHHHHH MY GOD

- O HMYGOD OH MY GOD !!!!! IF THEY MAKE LOST SHIPPING CANOIM KILLINGN YMSELF

- WHY WOULD YOU DOT HAI TOCME

- pls im so scared i realyl cant

- COLE WAS THE REAL CHEF??? I FUCKING TOLD YALL HE COULD COOK !!!!!!! I TOLD YALL!!!!!! I WAS THE #1 COOK-COLE TRUTHER

- “why do u say stuff like that” /);&2&$;

- making art :,))

- literally coles family

- THEY ACKNOWLEDGED IT THEY SAID THE THING

- a city could be lost i think- oh. No no. No. if they take the cowards way out im actually never watxhing this show again /hj

- wildfyre is so funny

- why is he attacking them riyu is litwrally right there

- “ive always got you arin” im ending it all

- THAT THROW WAS SO COOL

- arin please

- HES SOS ILLYRJJSNF

- ughhh i know hes not gnna feel. great after that

- “is there some sort of social cue im not picking up” OH MY GOD!!! HES SO AURISTIC CODED

- huh???? why does it talk ☠️☠️

- HUH LMFAOO

- LMFAOOOOO ARIN LAUGHING MDKDJSJ

- OH MY GOD BACK TO GEO NOOO

- oh my god. if they. if they do what i think theyre going to do i will lose my mind.

- cole save me cole if you can hear me save me save me cole

- bonzle is so funny new kin

- NOT MY BEST WORK ☠️

- ok geo self sufficient he should be.. ok..

- why do they want bonzle???

- COLE OH MY GOD

- OHHH MY GOD

- is there a lego set of this dragon cause i want it

- yall better hear me out on this dragons va… /hj

- so how did cinder even learn shartterspin

- COLE OH MY GOD SNGRY COLE

- angry cole supremacy

- husbands

- WE REALLY MISSED TOUR BREAKFASTS OH MYMGOD

- OH MY GOD OH MYGOD OH MYOGOD LOST SHIPPING I XANT

- cole and geo r sooo gay

- lostshipping makes up for laxk of jay tbfh

- Ok i didnt know dragoks could be ninja either??

- ok but how cool would it be if one of them turned evil to fight them like

- omgomgomg

- yeah why did they want bonzle

- i want a bonzle figurine like NOW

- omg omgogmogmogm

- THEM TRYING TO PULL UP THE ROCKS

- ok she knoes . aomething

- jordana is actually insane

- alright what the flip

- Oh . No… no no

- it is a little funny wildfyre

- YESSS TRAINING ARC

- IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS SCENEE

- WHERE CAN I GET A FROHICKY PLUSH PLEASW ANSWER QUICKLY

- PLEASE TELL ME THE STORY

ep 5

- ITS TO WORK ON CONFLICT ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

- theyre aoo dating

- the heart on the plush ☠️

- the lil looks zane ans cole gave each other bc they havent seen each other in peobablt years someone put me our ofnmy misery

- Ok bonzle let us know fr

- UM?????????? BONZLE???????

- omg i was waiting for this scene omg where they like switch stuff frm their mexhs

- SO WHAT IS WILDFYRE THEN

- heat and fire. what

- GEO AND COLE!!!

- ZANE?? CLURXHING THE PLUSHIW?? COLE AND GEO HOLDING HANDS??

- MASTER WU??

- DRAGONS CAN DO SLI JITSU

- NOOO WU AND BONZLE :(

-wu not bringing it up is so canon

- loneliness :(

- Oh my god garmadon this season??

- Ohh my god. i MIGHT like wu after this

- little one :(

- its wildfyre pretending shes a mucoid that reminds me shes litwrally a child and i cry

- Ok is this get mad at arin day What the flip.

- OHH MY GOD

- COLe AND GEO HOLDING HABDA OH MYMGVOV

- OH MYMGOD????+> mygodbi cant icant

- cole has become. so so so soft it makes me so emtoional

- hello??

ep 6

- ohh my god the forehead touch.

- NO??:&/$:

- lloyd havinf anxiety incnt

- “my other family” Cryingn

- oh. oh no

- not dorama bro fuck this guy genuinely worst character i hate him sm

- cole not veing a performer :(

- this is some power ranger type transformstion

- why doesnt zabe have a mech

-qlright ehat the flip

- didbt type a lot this ep i was eating candy

ep 7

- bonzle is so silly

- THTEE MONASTERIES

- AAAAAA BRUISE FIGHTING OVER VIDEO GAMES AND GOING ON A DATE I CANT DO THIS.

- JAY REFERENCE OHHH MY GOD

- she loojs like ice kings gf frm adventure time. i forgot her name

- i feel so bad for arin this actually sucks

- OHH MY GOD IM SO ARIN!! not beinf able to take compliments bx hes so hard on himself . Kin

- wildfyre about to save them all rn by getting along w the dragons

- her acknowledging that kais her favorite can i please be let out of my cage

- Ohhh mg god??? hes dying?? no wonder hes so grumpy

- what is this lady saying omfg 😭

- NOOO WAIT OH MY GOD !!!

- “im just a bundle of nerves stumbling around in a daze” WAHH

- ohh lloyds gnna turn evil sorry not sorry

- can we get more baby lloyd and master wu scenes plz

- lloyds inly part mortal tho

- WHAG THE FLUP WHAT THE FLIP

- ghis is trap… this is a trap bonzle omfg

- nvm im just scared

- yeah theyre cooked chat gg

- Oh no. theyre cooked

- OH MGMGOD OH MYMGOD JAY????? IS JAY GOING TO BE OH MGMGOD

- PLEASE VILLAIN JAY SAVE ME SAVE ME VILLAIN JAY VILLAIN JAY IF YOU CAN HEAR ME

- kai gets so frustrated when he cant learn something its so cute

- Ohh my god lore.

- “just fun. no need to worry about saving the world”

- OHHG MY GOD BABY KAI AND NYA

- NOOOOOOO

- HE DID THE. HE HOLG CRAP

- GODDDDD I LVOE KAI AND NYA SO MUCH I CANT DO THIS

- thats so infsresting that he got it first like not to be that guy but - THSE BLOOD MOON WHAT THE FLIP

- COLE!! GEO!!! GET DOWN!! THEY COME FOR GAY PEOPLE FIRST

- EXCUSE ME??

- omg omgomgokg jay jay jay jay jy

- PLEASS VILLAIN JAY SAVE ME VILLAIN JAY VILLAIN JAY ID YOU XAN HEAR ME

- i hate the administration sm

- TRUEEEEEE !! zane is so silly

- THE SILLIES!!

- why is the administration mad like U MADE THE RULES ☠️

- save me agent jay walker agent jay walker if you can hear me

- Ermmm O HMGMGOD

- OH MY GOD AGENT JAY WALKER IF YOU CNA HESR ME

- AGENT JAY Wlker o hmygkod

ep 8

- NO ACTUAL WAY THAT HAPPWNED CHAT AINT NO WAY

- anyways. dragosn pulling the most epic prank . turning to stone

MY APP REFRESHED AND I LOST ALL MY NOTES

was mostly juat acreaming abt jay tbfh

anyways im at the part where they fell

- DID SOMEBODY SAY BOOM /ref

- genuinwlt almost had a heart attack there shoot

- bounty has to be destroyed at least once a season

- i need a bonzle figurine im so srs

- rlly confused rn 💯

- poor thint :(

- Okay get in

- wait im scared is she being tricked rn

- is this a trap idk im scared

- WAIT TIA A TRAP ITS A TRAP ITS A TRAP

- NO I DONT LIKE THIS I DONT LIKE THIS

- ok wasnt a trap but lord ras ass

- NOOO

- jordana be so fr

- “never seen her before in my life” LMFAO

- this sucks on god how is this going to be semi-wrapped up in 2 eps

- i thought that atorm was a lloyd nightmare ngl

ep 9

- ok baby lord ras liek i gaf???

- Ok nvm i do feel bad him w the apple put me out of my misery

- him sacrificng ppl is kinda crazy tho like hello?

- Like hello???? no way we cld actually feelcbad for him (did feel bas for him)

- wildfyre si scared of heights :(

- lloys getting all these visions is genuinely so sad and nya comforting him put me out of my miswry!!!

- LEAVE BONZLE ALONE

- ALEIGHT WHAY THE FLIP

- LITWRALLT WHATXIA RHIS

- THE ROCKS??

- but wherws the road road road road /ref

- RIYUS FLYING

- OO KILL EM

- “sorry i cabt remember your name!” OHH MYKDJSJDN

- “whats your elemental power?” its autism

- invisible shoes??

- HOW DID IT TAKE HIS VOICE

- COLES A PUPPYYY AAAA

- “im ALWAYS adorable” CUTEEJDKSNFM

- they cannot be fr

- cinders so-Lemme chill

- OU KY GOD HES BORDERLIJE FERAL

- if arin saw lloyd and nya as his mom and dad i wilk start screaming crying theowginh up

EP 10

- NIOOOOO ITS LLOYD AND NYA O HMYGOD

- WAIT HOYL FUCK I KNEWNIT I KNWW IT WHAT DID I SAY CHAT WHAT DID I SAY THEYRE EVIL

- OH MGMGODDDDD THATS ACTUALLY CRAZY IM SKIPPIGN THE INTRO

- bonzle :(

- ok nvm theyre not evil . Shoot. why did i want it so bad

- NOOO BONZLE

- ohh no chat

- cinders insabe

- Ok byt hes so.. Hear me out

- sharterspinning be so cool doe

- NO. NO NO N O N O

- oh ky fod i litedally paused it hc i cldnt NOOO

- OH MYMGOD NO ACTUAL WAY

- GG CHAT GG

- AND WHO IS THAT

- oh my god. is kai dead like

- NOOOO :(

- LLOYDDDD OH MY GOD

- YESSSSS

- BONZLE FIGHT BADK

- BONZLEEEE OH MGMGOD

- OH KYMGOD ARIN UR NOT SRS

- sora..

- wair.

- NO NO N O N O KAI

- ???

- what the flip

- what the actual flip chat

- ok what rhe flip

- jordana genuinely tweaking rn

- ok whos lord ras’ master

- lloyd n cole hug i cant.

- BUT MY BIG BROTHER WAS ALWAYS MY HERO FUCK.

- WILSFYRE NOOO

- this is rhe weost thinf tht couldce evwr happwnwd

- bonzle n kai wahhh 😭

- no axtual waycir ended like that

Thank u all for coming. i will now be crying my eyes out

#dragons rising spoilers #dragons rising s2 #dragons rising s2 spoilers #ninjago #ninjago dragons rising #lloyd garmadon #ninjago arin #ninjago sora #nya smith #kai smith #luma talks

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relaxxattack · 1 month

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I’m getting into homestuck and it’s very good I’m just starting act 6! But I feel like I’d have some Controversial takes in the fandom. Mainly that I think people need to talk about Jade more how is she underrated??? Also I don’t get Meowrials as a ship plz explain (I love Nepeta btw it’s just, Equius…..)

I DONT KNOW HOW JADE IS UNDERRATED ITS CRAZY...

i think the reason i personally dont post much about jade is because shes like a cool bug i found underneath a rock. ill stare at her a lot like omg isnt this bug cool does anyone else want to look at this bug with me. but i dont actually know enough about jade to really make Jade Understander™ posts or anything. shes really interesting and im planning to do a deeper dive into jade-ism when i reread homestuck.

as for meowrails well. as a huge equius lover. its hard to explain. everything i like about him is shit where you just have to read into it very hard 😭 aka the source is that i made it the fuck up. but yes i love equius hes so great. you just have to let him into your heart.

#gardenergulfie #hsmeta #op #so good to see you getting into the comic though!!!! i remember that before you said youd just read fics due to being unable to get thru it #so congrats on reading homestuck! lol #unless that wasnt you and im thinking of someone totally different. in which case bury me in the fucking earth

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gnometa233 · 24 days

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Heya

There's something I wanted to ask you about this post you made

https://www.tumblr.com/gnometa233/746039179777015808/we-need-more-weird-queers-yall-cant-even-handle?source=share

Here you say in the tags TERFs came up with the term bi lesbian. I'm by no means saying I don't trust you or think you're lying but I wanted to ask for some info regarding that piece of info, since whenever I try looking into it I never find anything

One time I made a post that featured that same thing and TERFs got to it and I had to delete it since I had no proof whatsoever and did not want that post to become a TERF-hive.

Thank you for reading this far and if you find anything please let me know

Okay so I was kind of rushing when I made that post so this is a certified "me when I spread misinformation" moment. My bad

Terfs didn't invent bi lesbianism. That was a whole thing in the early feminist movement where bisexuals didn't get recognized, blah blah blah, myself and other people smarter than me have spoken about it at length.

What I have seen is within more modern times, terfs online refering to lesbians who date trans women and nonbinary sapphics (but mostly trans women) as bisexual lesbians, refusing to validate their lesbianism and saying that they're actually bisexual. It is more niche and it will be hard to find, but I have seen this happen.

If anyone wants to add on to this feel free! Just plz don't be stupid.

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viscerax · 2 years

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hello! may i please request grabbers victims + finney with a trans s/o? (preferably ftm but you're free to do it how you want to ofc!!) tysm in advance <3

The Grabbed with a Trans S/O

(BTW, when I say the Grabbed, I am referring to the children that were kidnapped, so this includes Finney. Vance will not be included in this since I already did a whole post about Vance with an ftm s/o. Also, I can't find anything saying how old Griffin is supposed to be, bot to me he looks like MUCH you get them the rest of the victims, like maybe 11? Anyways, I'd feel uncomfortable with writing for him just due to the fact that he looks so young. If anyone can find any sources saying anything different about his age, plz lmk)

Billy Showalter (Paperboy)

He surprisingly caught on very easily. It didn't take a lot of explaining, and while he sometimes slipped up on the pronoun change, the name change was very easy to remember.

He definitely got pissed at anyone who would call you the wrong name or pronouns, but if you didn't want him to say anything, he wouldn't.

However I think that if he knows where a certain person who ever misgenders/deadnames you lives, they randomly stop getting the paper delivered to their house. He also sometimes has his dog tear up their lawn if they're not home.

Robin Arellano

Robin and you started dating after you began to transition/present as masculine. It was beginning of a new school year and everyone who was from your old school just called you a tomboy, but Robin was convinced you were really just a guy with a few feminine feature.

I don't think he really cares about gender. I feel like Robin is pansexual. If he loves someone, he loves someone, whether or not they are a guy or girl doesn't really bother him

Robin teaches you how to appear more "manly." With himself being on the shorter scale, I think he definitely has like certain tactics or stances that makes him feel more confident or masculine, so he figures it would help you too.

Bruce Yamada

I think the concept is very confusing to him. To be honest, Bruce seems like the kind of golden retriever kind of boy, he acts all confident, but he's very aloof. He's very confused, and he thinks you're breaking up with him at first. But then you sit him down and explain everything and he just sits there and listens.

He's accepting, but I think it takes him some time to get used to the name and pronoun change. He feels horrible whenever he misgenders you, and will continue to apologize even after he's corrected himself.

Finney Shaw

Guys okay hear me out but I kind of think Finney is trans... not like mtf, but like maybe nonbinary or genderqueer

You coming out to him probably helped him realize he was trans himself.

"Wow, so you are changing your name, and you're pronouns? That's so cool. I wish I could do that :(" then you'd just be standing there like "oh hun 🧍‍♂️"

Finney definitely offers to let you steal a bunch of his clothes and maybe he'd wear yours instead sometimes.

A/N: im sorry this is short but I hope you enjoyed this!!

#robin arellano #finney shaw #bruce yamada #billy showalter #robin arellano x reader #finney x reader #bruce yamada x reader #paperboy x reader

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helsensm · 2 months

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Anon that pointed out JVP - I am so very sorry for the delay. I thank you for your response.

This is a blog that is pro-peace/not anti-Palestinian last I saw and they endorse this heavy duty explanation: https://www.tumblr.com/anshelsgendercrisis/742674313753264128/is-jewish-voice-for-peace-actually-jewish-ive

That is a lot to read though, I am sorry :(

Another thing I stumbled across recently - JVP endorses BDS (that wasn't new), and BDS recently denounced Standing Together, which Ahmed Fouad Alkhatib calls out + explains why this is highly problematic: https://twitter.com/afalkhatib/status/1750735227763511779

No need to apologize, thank you for taking your time and coming back with sources, it was a good read! (also I went down the rabbit hole and filled the gaps in another topic, so thx for that too ahahh)

I'll make the links for anyone who's interested in knowing more on the matter:

Is Jewish Voice for Peace actually Jewish?

The problem with BDS and JVP

As far as I know, it's better to support Standing Together, The parents circle and T'ruah instead of JVP. Plz, let me know if there's a problem with any of them, since it's getting harder to stay on top of things with all the info overload...

#🍉#free palestine #my asks #non art post

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prettyravegirlnightcore · 6 months

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hello, mechanisms enjoyer. who is your favourite mechanism. what is your favourite album. what is your favourite song. what is your favourite photo. do you have a favourite live recording/have you been to a live show.

HIII ^_^

TS is my fav mechanism forever i think its so epic

fav album - ulysses dies at dawn i think......... at least for now

fav song - there are soooo many i love!!! right now its underworld blues cuz ive been listening to UDAD a lot :P

fav photo: I have hundreds of mechs photos saved @__@ heres some favs!

(photo credits: 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 - im not sure of the source for the first pic, sorry!!)

I wish i had been to a live show u__u iirc I started listening in late 2020, not long after DTTM

not sure about fav live recording.. I've rewatched lashings a lot (mostly cuz of TS) and also gender rebels, this one, and this one and Also the museum tour

btw I have this playlist of mechs live videos - if anyone has any recordings/compilations/etc that aren't on here plz let me know :o

thx for the ask!!!

[image description: 5 photos from photoshoots of the mechanisms.

1: the toy soldier in a shopping cart, which jonny is pushing towards the camera. the toy soldier is laughing and holding a teapot. marius' hat is also in the shopping cart. marius stands behind jonny, looking at his phone.

2: marius and the toy soldier happily skipping together

3: the toy soldier, smiling with its arms outstretched. it's surrounded by ashes, tim, jonny, brian, marius, and raphaella, who are looking at it with various expressions. jonny is facepalming

4: ivy pointing a euphonium at ashes, nastya, tim, jonny, and the toy soldier, who are all posed as if being pushed/blown backwards

5: all nine of the mechanisms standing next to each other. jonny is in the middle, pointing a gun at the camera

end image description]

#ask #the mechs #the mechanisms #< Sorry maintagging cuz of the playlist thing

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junokami · 1 year

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how did dave and john become friends in the first place?? we know dave actively goes out of his way to avoid talking to people (ex: in book 1 he takes all his lunch breaks in his car to avoid the possibility of having to talk to any of his coworkers, also him having one friend his entire life). they met in a computer class in their first year of high school but that doesn't explain anything lol

the jdate wiki says that john approached dave because he "found his depressed demeanor 'funny'" but i dont have a source for that and i still find it hard to believe that dave would have even been receptive to john's approaches. anyone who knows what book that quote is from or has their own thoughts/headcanons about how they became friends, plz let me know

#jdate #john dies at the end #i honestly cannot imagine the series of events that led to their friendship #yall remember that quote from owen in book 2 #“how the hell did you two find each other” or something like that #local drug addict adopts emo social recluse more at 11

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aspd-culture · 1 year

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I think my friend has ASPD. I know he can’t afford therapy right now, and he’s holding everything in. I am autistic and just generally very different from him, and I’m clueless about how to support him. Nothing I found while googling was helpful. Does anyone have any tips or resources? How do you feel most supported by friends? I don’t know how to meet him where he is and I want to.

First and foremost, thank you so much for caring enough about your friend to ask this question. Genuinely, if more people tried to learn even a bit from people with ASPD, a lot of us would be better off.

That said, you do first need to know your friend and how they respond to this type of thing. Most people I know, but especially people with ASPD, can get defensive about people making assumptions like this about us if we aren't comfortable with it. My best friend or fiancé could tell me "hey I think you have (insert literally anything no matter how stigmatized)" and I would take it with love and research it heavily and get back to them on if I agree. If any of my other friends did that though, I wouldn't take it super well especially something as stigmatized as ASPD. So, if your friend wouldn't be into this, then avoid the urge to assume they have it. That said, some of the other advice I have you can follow without it having to be an assumption that they have it and some of it is honestly just being a good friend imo so stay tuned.

If your friend *would* be ok with this, then I'd suggest bringing it up to them and seeing if they've heard of it. Come armed with light research (plz no pages and pages of things we do that might be symptoms - that feels intimidating to almost anyone who isn't expecting it) that led you to this conclusion, and make sure to not just avoid stigma but to actually face it head on in this convo - something like "and I know this is something that carries a lot of stigma. I want you to know that this isn't in any way me saying anything bad about you. I just care about you and want to help you get support in the best ways I can, and if knowing more about this can help you then I'd like to help you with that. If you do have it, I will not judge you or think less of you in any way, and if I say something that feels judgemental or stigmatizing please let me know so I can apologize and do better". Stick to that if you say it though please. If they do have ASPD, they're probably pretty good at sniffing out false positivity/sugarcoating.

So, if they are down to research more or you find out they already thought they might have it, that is a good conversation to start with. From there, do your research on the disorder both under the umbrella of how you've noticed it affecting your friend, and outside of that (since there may be symptoms you dismiss and find out later your friend actually *does* struggle with or that they start struggling with later down the line). Learning about the disorder in general is great to decrease stigma even if this friend doesn't end up having it. Make sure this research includes anecdotal stuff across many different media platforms and creators. Don't get all your stuff from one site or creator, or just from scholarly sources. Anecdotal stuff will help you know what day to day life feels like for someone with it but is more likely to not necessarily apply to your friend whilst scholarly stuff is more likely to be stigmatized/demonized, but is more likely to be universal. If your friend addresses anything specific they struggle with that is a part of ASPD, try and find what has helped others with that same symptom. I know personally I love when my friends tell me "hey I know you said you had trouble with this here's something that I found that might help" even if it doesn't bc it shows you're listening and care about how hard this is for the person with the disorder.

Make sure during this research to look into tags like "aspd stigma" or "cluster b stigma" to find out harmful things that are done/said to people with the disorder and try to internalize the information given there so you avoid accidentally hurting your friend. Oftentimes when we feel attacked or condescended against, we get frustrated and lash out because our brains tell us we don't need people, any people, in our lives.

Onto the stuff that is useful even if they wouldn't be ok with you talking about this (aside from researching bc again that could benefit you as a person either way to know).

Try and be sensitive and caring with your friend's feelings of anger, frustration, etc. People with ASPD tend to have heightened sensitivity to these emotions and we often lash out over things that seem small because we have a natural "short fuse" especially when it comes to other people. Don't coddle to the point where it would annoy someone, but just try and see the situation from the perspective of your friend. Even if something "isn't worth" getting angry at to you, they may not be able to control it. An ex friend of mine used to say something to the affect of "if someone lost their pencil and that made them want to (TW) harm themselves, then it doesn't matter that the pencil wouldn't be important to me because evidently it's important to them and *they* are important to me". Bad person, but good advice.

Learn what flat affect is and try to learn to be comfortable with it. I personally hate having to put on appropriate affect and find that having to fake that makes me feel dissociated and disconnected with my own emotions (which leads to more lashing out bc anger creeps in without me realizing). The best thing anyone in my life could do for me would be to be ok with flat affect and not ask "are you ok" 80 times (once is nice and I appreciate it but if I'm ok and they keep asking it again makes me irrationally angry) just because I'm acting normal for me. Not everyone deals with flat affect, but if your friend does, they might appreciate this quite a bit and it might make you a safe place for them to stop masking.

Try to learn the difference between your friend intentionally being mean/harsh and them just being blunt. My bluntness has lost me too many potential/former friends bc they thought I was just trying to be mean. Yes this is of course something I work on, but it helps when my friend doesn't take it personally and says "hey that came off pretty harsh but I know you didn't mean it" vs getting emotional about it and yelling at me/assuming I wanted to hurt them when I didn't.

Don't push too hard to manage/mask the symptoms. Obviously some symptoms are harmful and need to be managed, and I don't in any way mean to let your friend hurt your feelings even on accident without standing up for yourself. I just mean that if your friend *does* have ASPD you shouldn't ever expect them to get to a point where they won't show symptoms bc this is not the type of disorder where it can be cured or even mitigated to the point where it isn't noticible. It's sort of like asking an autistic person to stop showing any autistic traits. It wouldn't be possible - they would just be masking 24/7 which leads to burnout, meltdowns, etc right? Similar idea with ASPD. Encouraging and helping them get their symptoms to a non-destructive level if any are currently harmful to them is great but if it's not harmful then allow them the space to have symptoms. Tbh letting some non-harmful symptoms (such as flat affect) go without masking them helps me control the ones that can be harmful.

Be open and honest about your feelings. A major part of ASPD is issue with empathy, meaning if your friend seems like they don't care that you're upset, it's very likely because they don't know. Get good at communicating "hey I'm feeling this rn" or "the thing you just said made me feel XYZ". This lessens some of the massive workload that people with ASPD have to do to engage in close friendships which again helps avoid social burnout or frustration. This goes for good and bad emotions - it's also nice to hear "hey that was a really sweet thing you just did/said, and that means a lot to me". Bonus points if you can help any confusion they may have about mutual friends emotions. For example if you notice (thanks to the superpower you people with empathy got *built in*) that a mutual friend is upset at the friend with ASPD traits, and they don't seem to get it, pulling them aside or mentioning in a discreet way what they're feeling and why ("hey X, you seem kinda hurt about the thing Y just said") also can go a long way to easing the burden of low empathy.

Learning to recognize impulsive needs and what fills them for your friend can do a lot too. This doesn't work for everyone, but sometimes when I wanna do something sorta off the wall (which is a symptom of ASPD), having my friend offer to do something impulsive but safe helps me personally. For example, if my brain starts itching to pick a fight and my friend pulls out of the blue "hey do you wanna go (insert replacement behavior - for me that would be concerts due to the high energy release or things like sports/indoor trampoline park due to the gross motor and testosterone release)", it can entirely stop me from doing the original destructive behavior. The trick for me though is you can't bring it up *as a replacement*. So for me if my friend asked me "what can we do to avoid you fighting someone rn", nothing we came up with would work, but if they just notice me getting irritable and say "you know what? I wanna go to the trampoline park rn do you wanna come?" then that would work. This is harder for some than others so this step may not be applicable to your friend in particular but I know it does help some.

I think that's everything I have off the top of my head right now, but thank you again (/gen) for the question!

Small edit: upon rereading to check for clarity and proofread, I realized this comes off as me assuming you have typical to high empathy. If you struggle with low empathy, which I know sometime comes with autism, my apologies! Much of the answer to this question was written with how my friend who doesn't struggle with low empathy helps me, and I accidentally wrote it assuming a similar dynamic)

#actually antisocial #actually aspd #antisocial personality disorder #aspd #aspd awareness #aspd culture #aspd-culture-is #aspd traits #anons welcome #aspd stigma

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