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evilminji · 4 months

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Back at it again with the BNHA crossover Ponderings!

Nedzu is LITERALLY one of THE smartest beings on the planet, right? Like... he's probably on some internationally recognized list of Top Planetary IQs? Which is why Japan let's him get away with so much?

Cause they REALLY fucked him over, he has the power to leave, and that would be really, REALLY bad Brain Drain wise/politically for the Japanese Government? (Also pls don't become a Supervillian we literally can not afford that, Mr. Nedzu Sir? Etc etc)

You think he has... like? Chats? With the OTHER top intellects? Some kid in Siberia with the New Super Intelligence Quirk his parents can't begin to even handle, gets put in history's WEIRDEST group chat? I like to think so.

But the REASON I ask this?

What hero do you call? For Weird Shit in international waters?

Suspicious, floating, weirdly two dimensional and HIGHLY radioactive... corrosive... green goop? Rings? Orbs? CAN it be an orb if it's two dimensional? It certainly LOOKS like there is depth to it... somehow...

A THING. In the sky.

Shouldn't be there, man. This is a shipping lane. It's scaring the people on passing ships. No one knows what Quirk could have made this. Might be a trafficking victim's call for help. Might be a first Quirk Use mishap. They need to know what it IS and how to get rid of it.

They go the normal routes first. Doesn't work. Okay, call in some professionals. Kinda pricey, but no big. Right? Doesn't work. Okaaaay, call in a SPECIALIST. REAL pricey, but this thing is holding up international trade, making people in fancy ass suit all Nervous(TM).

Doesn't Work.

Specialist tells um to not to bother with calling anyone else on their normal list. Is looking at the green goo like it spat on his mother and called his dog a whore. They would prefer he NOT make that facial expression. That is a facial expression that will get them yelled at by their bosses. Fuck(TM).

Now Politics(TM) are involved. People want to STUDY the green goo. Harness it for dubious and unknown green goo experiments. Poke it with their Quirk to see what'll happen. There's fuckin REPORTER with no concept of self-preservation, trying to get CLOSER to the RADIOACTIVE POISON GOO.

Fuckin Heros have shown up.

Why are you bastards even HERE. What? Are you peacocks gonna PUNCH it? Get off their rig! Stop posing in front of the GOO!

Then? Oh thank GOD. The SMART people show up. Certified, highest grade, triple refined, PREMIUM Nerds(TM). The WAY above our pay grade folks. We're SAVED! Can we PLEASE go home now? We are just ocean cleaners! Our job is debris! Not weird GOO!

Enter, stage Super Cool Helicopters? The Elite Nerds of Earth. Of which Nedzu is one. Since Japan is closest. And it's a school weekend! He had some time.

And?

Ha ha... Thanks, he hates it! Nedzu's stoat brain is SCREAMING and he wants NOTHING to do with...? What he is somehow CERTAIN is a floating pit of Death! Interesting effect. Anyone getting that or just him?

Then? Some hot head on loan to Korea from the states? Spots something. SomeONE. And does he TELL the newly arrived professionals? So they may do a risk assessment? Figure out a way to rescue this individual SAFELY? Of course not!

Said hot head has supposedly indescribable chains! So he just flings them rights on in! Grabbing the boy from the center of the portal, pulling him free, and in the process? Immediately destabilizing it. Causing it to collapse down towards everyone bellow.

He also then proceeds to DROP the young lad, in his alarm at this entirely predictable outcome.

Right. Into. The Ocean.

A boy, who is dressed in filthy medical scrubs, haunting familiar in a way nothing should EVER be again, and entirely unconscious. Plunge down into the briny deeps and bitter cold. Alone. Abandoned. Death, thick and viscous, losing form and raining down like bile.

Everyone saving themselves.

Ah, he rather liked this suit.

The salt water ruins it. The droplets of Green, burn like molten glass each time they touch him. He will likely have at least a few new scars, after today. Assuming this is not the end of him. But he swims fast. The boy sinking slower then his size would suggest he should. He grabs hold and arcs, dragging them both from beneath the fallout of yet another humans hubris.

He does not stop swimming. Not until he knows he is near the helicopter. He is thankful, that he dragged Aizawa along. The man takes one look at his serious expression, the state of his rescued young friend, and merely hauls them both out of the water and into the machine.

Time to go.

They saw nothing, it seems. And there is nothing to be found.

The boy does not wake. Not for quite a while. Long enough, that Nedzu, perhaps unwisely, has grown attached. Is considering adoption. If only too terrorize a few goverment bodies. And... well... the boy will need some who UNDERSTANDS. And the scars paint a very specific sort of tale. But first, the most important question, when beginning these things...

"Tea? Or would you prefer coffee?"

@the-witchhunter @mutable-manifestation @hypewinter @hdgnj

#minji's ponderings #bnhaxdp #dp x bnha #principal nedzu

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richiekirschs · 10 months

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SHE’S MY BABY — Spider-Man!Lottie Matthews

and i hope you don’t save some other girl…

warnings— fem reader (she/her used), typical spider-man shenanigans, gun mentions, ooc lottie probably

[part 1]

lottie: when did you want to get coffee

lottie: 11:15 at little collins?

you: isn’t that in the city?

lottie: yeah but i can venmo you for the ferry fee

you: no it’s fine i can take the bridge

lottie: ok see you tmrw

you: here

you: sitting in a booth towards the back

Lottie’s late.

You’re anxiously checking your phone screen over and over, trying to make sure you haven’t missed any rain-check texts.

11:28. Nothing.

You fidget in your seat, bouncing your leg, looking at the door with hopeful eyes whenever the bell chimes.

At exactly 11:30, the door swings open, a frantic Lottie rushing in from the other side.

“I’m sorry!” she immediately says, collapsing into the booth. “This guy stole an old lady’s purse, and then—“

“Lottie,” you interrupt, “calm down. I’m not mad, I just thought you forgot.”

“No,” she promises, still a bit out of breath. “No, I actually swung over here.”

“What, like, with your webs?”

“Would you lower your voice?” she hisses.

“It’s New York, Lot,” you deadpan. “I literally saw a man taking a shit on the sidewalk.” You lock eyes with a man at the counter, leaning back to stretch his arms. You jerk your thumb at Lottie as you say, “She’s Spider-Man.”

“Shut the fuck up,” he says before turning back to his phone.

You sip from your drink. “So how exactly did this happen? Is this your weird attempt at a fursona?”

“It’s not a fursona,” she mumbles defensively. “I got bit by a spider. I guess it was, like, radioactive or something.”

“Radioactive?” you repeat. “Like the dogs in Chernobyl?”

“Yeah,” she replies, “except I didn’t grow any extra teeth like those fish. I fell onto this lady on the subway the night after and my hand got stuck to her shirt, and I… ripped it off…” She flushes pink.

“How the fuck did that happen?”

“I’m, like… sticky,” she informs you, embarrassed as she flexes her hands. You wrinkle your nose at sticky. “And I get these weird tingles right before something happens.”

“Does the web come out of you?” you question, genuinely intrigued.

“Yeah,” she shrugs. “I don’t have extra legs, though, before you ask.”

“How’d you get out last night?”

“I put the suit back on in the shower, then went back out the window. I went down the balcony into your bedroom. Natalie came in, though, so I hid on… the ceiling…” As the words leave her mouth, she clearly realizes how weird it sounds.

“I’m impressed, Lot,” you admit. “It’s been a year, and I never would’ve guessed it was you. I thought you had some secret lover and that’s why you were sneaking around.”

It’s her turn to wrinkle her nose. “God, no. I felt really bad about always leaving you, though.”

You shrug. “It’s definitely not as bad as when Tai and Van coincidentally sneak off to go have sex. They’re not even subtle about it.”

Lottie laughs, but she shifts uncomfortably, like someone just licked their finger and stuck it in her ear.

You frown. “You okay?”

She looks up, but it’s almost like she’s looking through you. Her eyes track movement in the window at your back.

She grabs her backpack. “I have to go.”

You turn around, but there’s nothing there. You whip back around to face her. “What the hell, Lottie?”

“I’m sorry!” she insists. “I’ll—I’ll call you, okay?”

She doesn’t give you time to respond before she’s sprinting out the door of the café, chasing down whatever she’d seen behind you.

You’re upset, to say the least.

You walk back to the ferry parking garage where you’d parked, grinding your teeth. If it were a cartoon, you might have steam coming out of your ears.

You have to take three laps around the garage before you finally find your car.

But as you approach your car, you can see a figure yanking at your driver’s side door.

“Hey!” you shout. “What the fuck?”

“This your car?” he asks.

“I’m not shouting at you for fun,” you snap.

“Give me your keys,” he commands.

“No, I’m not gonna give you my keys!”

He shoves his hand into the pocket of his jacket and points it at you. “Give me the fucking keys!”

“I can see your thumb sticking out, I know you don’t have a gun! It’s a piece of shit anyway, just back off—“

He starts forward, but he only gets a few steps in before something shoots past you—you literally blink and miss it, and when you look back at the man attempting to carjack you his hand is stuck to the wall with a fucking web.

Fucking Lottie.

“I thought she told you to back off, man,” Lottie sighs.

“Why do you sound like that?” the man asks, which is the same thing you’re wondering.

You know it’s Lottie, of course. But she’s using some weird, Ghostface-esque voice modulator.

“Sound like what?” she bluffs.

“No, I heard you earlier,” the man insists, “when you were chasing me. I know what a girl sounds like.”

“I’m not a girl!” Lottie shouts. “I’m a boy! Fuck—a man!”

If you hadn’t just been a victim of an attempted carjacking (and possibly murder), you would’ve bust out laughing. Lottie’s voice sounded very Mickey Altieri—it’s time, girlfriend!

“Man, I really don’t care,” the man shrugs, defeated.

Lottie mumbles, “Interrogation mode, off,” before turning back to you. “Go home, okay?”

You nod, surprisingly relieved by Lottie saving the day. You get into your car and turn the key.

“That’s gonna dissolve in 2 hours, okay?” Lottie tells the man, who’s still stuck to the wall.

“What?” he exclaims. “No, I need to get home!”

She jogs off. “2 hours! You deserve that!”

You can’t help but laugh as you start your drive home.

KITTY MEOWS! I pray this was as good as y’all wanted it to be… the second half is very heavily based on the scene of Donald Glover in Homecoming I thought it would be silly for Lottie 😞

#lottie matthews x reader #lottie matthews x you #lottie yellowjackets #lottie matthews #yellowjackets #yellowjackets x reader #courtney eaton

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thatharringrovehoe · 2 months

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Like, maybe Steve gets bitten by a radioactive spider in the secret Russian base. Developes powers and does what he's always done, protect people. He and Robin go to New York and rent a shoe box apartment and when Dustin gets accepted to University there he becomes *obsessed* with the local web slinging vigilante that saved him from muggers and then gave him a (terrifying) lift to his classes.

Meanwhile Billy wakes up in the back of a government van with a hole in his chest and a broken mind, probably on his way to be dissected in a creepy lab. No one really knows what happened. Just that the van crashed and went up in flames, Billy's body written off as a loss by the feds. He travels, never staying in one place for to long and minding his own fucking business as much as an undead mutant freak with super strength and impossible healing powers can. He goes to Cali for a while, but that turns out to be a mistake. His mom has a whole new family now, complete with two kids and a golden retriever, not a single picture of Billy in the entire house. It taints everything, and within a week he's gone, on a bus headed who knows where. He eventually finds himself in New York, doing shitty odd jobs for whoever can get past the scowl and faint black veins across his entire body. Not like he shows anyone his body. The scars alone are enough that he's permanently covered with a hoodie and jeans. Through one way or the other Billy finds himself working as a mercenary. The ability to regrow limbs and lift a car over your head really puts you on the fast track. Go figure. He's on his way back from a job when he hears a woman's muffled scream down a dark alley and without thinking he takes off like a shot. Billy ends up beating the shit out of some low life purse snatcher only for her to recoil and run the second she sees his face. Rolling his eyes he pulls up the scarf around his neck so just his eyes are visible. A voice he would know anywhere sounds from behind him.

"Wow, that was fucking rude of her. You alright?"

Billy turns around and his brain short circuits.

Get possessed by a demon shadow monster?

Check ✓

Come back from the dead?

Check ✓

His highschool crush turns out to be a god damn superhero?!

Check ✓

#billy hargrove #harringrove #steve harrington #that hoe writes #spideypool AU #deadpool!Billy #spiderman!Steve #as soon as i figure out how to banish this chronic fatigue #it's over for you bitches (affectionate)

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eezeybreezy · 10 months

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ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴜɴᴋ ᴀɴᴅ ʜɪꜱ ᴄᴀᴛ ➜ʜᴏʙɪᴇ ʙʀᴏᴡɴ x ɢɴ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

I have fallen to the Hobie brain rot and this is the result. This was a lot longer than intended so now it's broken into multiple chapters! Lmk if I should post those too or if this is too cringe. Part 2, Part 3, Part 4🔞

warnings: suggestive, not-so-accurate accent, recreational drug/alcohol use, partying, punk shit, eventual smut?

As they entered the headquarters, the pair were met with a cacophony of sound and movement. People in spider suits and uniforms hurried to and fro, carrying files, and talking urgently on their phones or to each other. Clearly, this was a place of importance, filled with sensitive work and decisions.

The first was a young woman, her hair pulled back into a high ponytail and dressed in a long, flowing maxi skirt in earthy tones, paired with a crochet top. Adorned with beads or other natural details, she walked confidently, looking around with a sharp eye and taking in every detail. The second was a young man, his steps a little slower and his gaze mellow. He was dressed in a concoction of ripped fabrics, belts, and buttons, his studded vest and chunky boots a signature in the halls they walked.

"Wow," breathed the woman, taking in the bustling scene. "I knew this was a big deal, but I had no idea.."

The man chuckled. "Told you it was the real deal."

The Spider you’d come to know was none other than Hobie Brown, a stand-out among his peers and variants alike. You’d only met after being rounded up as an anomaly, though you’d come to the HQ willingly, as any means to getting home was better than being stranded in some uppity renaissance dimension. After learning of your role as the Black Cat in your world, the punk had found a new friend in an unexpected place.

“Hm…” Hobie peered at you absentmindedly, seemingly turning something over in his head.

You didn’t like that look, and knowing the kinds of ideas an anarchist could come up with, you decide to pry, “What’s up?”

Hobie finally looked at you and not through you, “How did you get those abilities bruv like, I was bit by a radioactive spider so I have spider DNA in me, but how’d you get ‘em?”

“Hear me out, a cat bit me. But she wasn’t radioactive or anything, actually quite sweet.”

“Wait wait wait, you ‘ere bitten… by a cat? And you now have abilities like me??”

You giggled at this, he’s dumbfounded over a cat but a radioactive spider giving powers is the norm around here. “I don’t know about ‘like you’ per say.’

“Aight, maybe not exactly like me, but it’s similar yeah? You have wall-crawling abilities I presume or am I wrong? And probably enhanced strength?”

Why the sudden interest in my abilities, you thought. “I mean I do have enhanced strength and speed, but I can only climb up walls with my claws, I don’t stick like you all do,” referring to the bustling crowd of Spider-people you found yourself in the presence of.

“I see, then I have one last question… What does your suit look like? I’m proper curious ‘bout that.”

Now this was unexpected, not only was he interested in your powers, but your alter ego altogether. In the few months, you’ve been friends, little was spoken about your homeworld, let alone the role you play in that dimension. You wonder what’s gotten him so interested, and so you decide to tease a little, getting Hobie Brown flustered was something very few could boast.

“You ever been to a BDSM club? It’s like a leather dominatrix suit

“…” “That’s… huh.”

“Problem ‘Obie?” You poke at him playfully, gliding to stand closer to the slender man.

“Not at all… can’t say I’m not confused though…” he trailed off. “But hey, as your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man it’s not my problem that you have an… um… interesting taste in fashion.”

That got a snort out of you, “You’re one to talk about ‘interesting taste in fashion’, Mr. Spider Punk.”

A sigh comes from the taller man. “Fine. You win.”

Deciding to toy with him further, you play nonchalant and petty, “If I’m so annoying I’ll just leave then. I enjoyed meeting you Punk.”

“Oi oi, I didn’t mean to insult you, I swear… I'll be 'onest wiv ya, mate. I don't really know what I'm doin' 'ere. I'm just takin' it one day at a time and seein' where it takes me.” He looked up from the ground to look at you again, something sad in his eyes. “Life's a funny old game, ain't it?"

“The rockstar runway model is bad with people? Color me shocked”

Hobie let out a huff of air, which you could only assume mimicked a laugh, “Is that meant to be an insult or genuine criticism?”

“I was being serious Hobie, you seem to have a good handle on people. You’re just so cool I thought maybe you’d have it down by now” Despite wanting to crawl into a hole at your admission, you said it with your chest, and you’re not about to back out now.

He’s quite surprised by this, not anticipating such a blatant compliment from you. “Huh… you’re actually pretty rad yourself. Most people don’t think that and just call me a freak.”

“I mean I’d say I’ma freak too but that hasn’t gotten me any complaints if you know what I mean.” You say with a wink, deciding to lay it on thick.

He smirks at you, catching the vibes you're putting down quickly. “Oh, I understand what you mean. I just didn’t expect you to be this forward luv.”

“What’s the phrase? ‘You miss 100% something something-”

“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take?”

“Yeah yeah somethin like that”, you past your giggles. “You tryna get out of here?”

Hobie looks at you almost sideways, and if you didn’t know him better, you’d be put off by the glare. “Get out of here and do what exactly? What’re you planning?” He takes a step towards you, covering more ground than you’d anticipated due to his long strides. He was so close.

“I’m not dumb, I can tell you’re trying to trick me into something, but I’m not quite sure what…”

You smile at that, despite telling the truth, he’d managed to tease you in the process. We’re in the clear. “No trick here, not today at least.”

You look at him through thick lashes, “Did you have any ideas Spidey?” you ask coyly.

The punk chuckles,

“Ah, the ol’ playing coy shtick ‘uh? Not that I have anything against it, honest with you I kinda like it.”

Your tone is drenched in sarcasm, “Me? Coy? What kind of women do you take me for?” You’re feigning being offended, and he continues your banter. He laughs in a friendly way, deeply and honestly, a sound you wish was heard more often by the masses.

“Oh trust me you’re not like the other girls. You’re cool.”

“I’m not like other girls,” you say mockingly, trying to keep him amused. “So, what’s the punk down to do?”

Hobie’s face lights up with excitement, “I know just the place. Ever been to a punk rock show? There’s always tons of wankers to hang out with and it’s basically a Beano with loud ass music.”

You’d know about Spider-Man in front of you’s reputation, his subtle flex of eclectic success was something you’d come to admire about him. “I’ve had my fair share of underground events, though I’d call myself more goth than punk, you ever been to a goth club? I’m down to go to one of your shows if the anarchist is down to do some substances with me.”

He perked up at this. “Hell yeah, I’d be down, I love partying. Although, can I ask what kind of… substances you’re planning on using? I wanna make sure I bring the right shit.”

“Fuck no nothing hard, just weed and drinks will do it for me. That’s pretty stereotypical punk shit tho huh?”

“Yeah, well stereotypes exist for a reason. Though the whole ‘punks are stoners’ stereotype always bothers me, I never got why people think punk = drug abuse…” He shrugs.

The hair feels heavier, don’t kill the mood now! “ Well I do love me some weed, and hell yeah it’d be great to drink with you and have fun.” You keep going, hoping to bring that light back to the spider that was there but a moment ago. “I think the whole stereotype thing is stupid, but I totally understand why it doesn’t make sense to you, hating labels and all that.” You punctuate the end of your sentence with a punch to his shoulder.

“Alright, lead the way ‘Obie!”

He chuckles a bit at that, and playfully shoves you back into the portal he’s opened. You always land on your feet as you enter his dimension with a thud. He’s crouched next to you, standing to take off his mask and tuck his suit away.

“What was that for huh? I know you can punch ‘arder than that.”

He closes the portal and starts walking towards the club, throwing you a glance over his shoulder. He beckons you to follow. “It’s just up this way, hopefully, there won’t be too big of a crowd.” His guard is down now, it’s just you and Hobie Brown, not Spider-Punk and Black Cat, just two “civs” kickin it.

“If you’re down to spar I can show you more than a little punch Bee.” You send a wink at Hobie, hoping the new nickname didn’t make him uncomfortable. “And hey! I thought you were a celebrity, don’t get special treatment even in the underground huh?”

Hobie smirks at that, “Hah. You’re funny.” He peers down at you, despite your above-average stature. “So you wanna spar then? Because now I’m very tempted to see what you can do.” He’s being cheeky, you can hear it in his tone.

Oh, this man was dangerous, and you can’t help the sly smile that makes its way to your face. “Oh, I’d love to show you everything I can do.” You’re sultry now, biting your lip as you gaze up at him.

“Damn, you’re a cocky little cat huh?” He shakes his head laughing, but can’t hide the big smirk forming on his face.

“Don’t think I won’t accept your challenge, because I will…”

“Oh? Is that so? What’s the punk challenging me to do exactly?” You step closer, still looking up at the man, with a smug grin on your face.

“Oh, I think you know…” He smirks at you and steps closer. “Or should I remind you?”

You grab him by his guitar strap, pulling him down until your lips almost touch. “It must’ve slipped my mind, Bert.” You emphasize his name teasingly.

Despite the way your eyelids flutter shut, and how your lips seem to draw each other in, he chuckles and gives you a quick kiss on the lips, still very clearly smug.

“I’m glad I could remind you.”

#hobie brown #hobie x reader #atsv hobie #hobie x you #spider punk #across the spiderverse #atsp spoilers

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lildoodlenoodle · 10 months

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Spider Freaks(affectionate) no.7

Spider Noir:

Unlike most spider people, Noir wasn’t bitten by a radioactive spider, but rather a mystical spider that came out of a statue of a spider god. After being bit he sees or hallucinates a spider god, Anansi(Akan), Ereshkigal(Mesopotamian), or Neith(Egyptian) all are possibilities(kinda but that’s another post). He wakes up covered in webs and has spider powers. It’s kinda similar to Araña/Aña(Anya) Corazón in some respects to their origins.

So right off the bat, his powers are mystical and not radioactive, which is evident in how his spider sense presents. He does have super strength, but it is a fair bit below the average spider person. We’ve seen him more or less control some spiders that we believe are the same type as the one that bit him. He has organic webbing that is black(it’s white in the movie and in some comics, but it stayed black in my heart). Because of the mystical aspect to his powers there is most likely more beneath the surface but we’re getting into headcanon territory.

WELCOME TO HEADCANON TERRITORY

Personally, I think all the spiders should be freaks. Make them more like spiders, make them less human, love that shit.

Spider noir powers are mystic(or multidimensional depending on how you wanna spin it)in origin. With most spiders powers it’s very concrete on how they got them and what the effects of said event were. Noir is a bit of a wild card in that respect, because we don’t even know if the spider god is real or not. Spider Noir is an unreliable narrator because of that.

Now the color webbing change and what that means:

No, I don’t like it but it furthers a theory I have. If the spider god is real then it is changing Peter throughout the series. Originally the webbing was black, after Peter meets the other spider people it turns white(this was probably an artistic choice due to new people being on the comic but still). This shows that he’s still changing AFTER the initial bite. We’ve seen something like this with other versions of Spider-Man, but they usually keep changing until they turn into an actual spider-human creature. The difference between Noir and those other examples is that a radioactive spider is not sentient. It is not choosing how much of a spider you are becoming. A spider god on the other hand very much could.

Now this, this could mean anything. What does a spider god consider to be important spidery changes? It’s difficult to tell for a bunch of reasons, especially for the ‘Why?’. But things I’d think could be possibilities include:

BLACK WEBBING

Claws/talons

Excessive hair

Exhibiting spidery behavior/instincts

Extra limbs

Fangs with venom(could liquify preys’ inside or just be death or paralyzing venom)

Mandibles

More eyes

Oral pedipalps

Spider limbs(think Kaine Parker)

Split lower jaw

Split upper jaw

Stinger(again Kaine Parker)

Talking to spiders

And more, probably. The ones in bold are my HCs but literally any of these could happen if he continues to ‘mutate’.

And, last one, brought to you courtesy of Burning Matches on AO3, the wind. Remember that scene from the first movie?

“Wherever I go the wind follows, and the wind smells like rain”*dramatic pose*

This could totally be put on the role of an exaggerated caricature of a noir film PI Noir is filling but let’s assume it’s not. Instead it’s a manifestation of the spider god, ‘following’ him. Because it’s not wind, it’s breathing. Which is insane and terrifying but it is one of my favorite headcanons that came out of that fic.

Feel free to add any more freaky biology or spidergod headcanons in the comments/tags! I love hearing this shit!!!

#spiderman noir #Spider-Man #into the spiderverse #across the spiderverse #spider god #spider noir #ITSV #ATSV #spider noir conspiracies

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elemom · 6 months

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@legofreak33 Thank you for ordering the Autism Deluxe Special!

Here’s why I think Zane Julien is Nuclear Powered

(Contains spoilers for 2011 ninjago seasons 1-3)

(I also have not finished the show so i might be missing some details)

A singular object that has seemingly infinite energy

Infinite energy is impossible, but there’s something that comes pretty close - radioactive materials. Since they are *literally* emitting energy and can do so for thousands of years, radioactive objects are basically the closest thing to an “object that acts as an infinite energy source” you can get.

Blue Light

It’s blue. It glows.

Now I couldn’t find a specific element that glows blue AND could be used in nuclear energy, as the only one I know of is cesium chloride. HOWEVER. I don’t need a specific element in order to prove my point here.

Cherenkov radiation.

Cherenkov radiation occurs when charged particles (say, an electron) moves faster than light. IRL this is only possible in a medium wherein photons themselves are slowed, such as water, but in the realm of make believe anything is possible. Even if we DO have real world physics in play, it’s totally possible that the energy core just has water inside it along with everything else (the core’s Blue DOES have a bit of movement after all!)

Critical Mass and Going Boom

This is where it gets too easy. They literally say it can reach “critical mass” IN THE SHOW. THEIR WORDS. NOT MINE.

If you aren’t familiar, critical mass is basically a point where there is enough material (a certain *mass*) in one area to cause a chain reaction: An atom releases a radioactive particle, which hits another atom, causing it to release another radioactive particle. Now we have two radioactive particles. They keep hitting other atoms. And so on and so forth. (Strangely, the show seems to reference critical mass as running *out* of energy, which is the literal exact opposite of what it actually is, so i’m opting to ignore that.)

So how does this apply to Zane and the references to a critical mass in the show? I personally like to believe that his “critical mass” was caused by *using too much power at once.* Kinda. There’s probably a control mechanism with neutron absorbers inside the core, so maybe the critical mass was caused by him retracting said absorbers, thus causing a chain reaction. (also as a tangent, titanium is apparently a decent neutron absorber! perhaps the real titanium ninja was the friends we made along the way)

Oh, and by the way. Nuclear objects reaching criticality are known to glow blue.

Pic related.

Difference between this and the core glow would be based on the types of particles, with the former being charged particles in a medium and the latter being neutrons. I think. Idk im a biologist not a nuclear physicist i dont go here i just autism about it

discussion section

So yeah! Dr. Julien just created a tiny nuclear reactor to make his son go. Sure. Fuck it. Who Gives A Shit

Anyway i think that’s all i have!!! This obviously isn’t all encompassing (how did Nya survive holding a piece of the core? Why was the explosion all icy and not like, anything else? How does Zane not kill everybody he meets?) but those can all be explained away in the name of “i have had a special interest in nuclear energy since i was a very small child and nobody can take this away from me.” like maybe people are fine because he just has really good shielding. Or maybe Nya is fine because girls are immune to radiation (totally true fact)

Thanks for reading! Take this piece of uranium ore as thanks for reading this entire post. 🪨

#ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago zane #zane julien #dr julien #long post #i sound like matpat.#i’m sorry guys the autism won’t stop winning

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yki-dolls · 5 months

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What are your headcannons about 2003 Donnie?

Ooh boy

So like

He's just as completely unhinged as Rise Don, he's just better at hiding it. Sometimes.

He and Raph are twins.

He needs to drink approximately 4 litres of coffee before he is capable of thought

B o m b s

He's so fucking suspicious of any and everyone who could possibly hurt his brothers and Usagi got the brunt of it lmao

Does not help that Leo and Usagi definitely had those 🏳️‍🌈 vibes and he does not like the idea of his big brother dating anyone at all, let alone this guy who might have poisoned him.

He'll be like *giggling and kicking his feet* whilst listening to death metal screaming about disestablishing the government

He can cook. Unfortunately it all tastes like water somehow. Like he could put in an entire bag of spice in and it'd still somehow taste of water. At least it's not on fire like Leo's cooking.

He will only swear when shit is REAL. Like if donny is swearing, you KNOW shits going down.

He may or may not keep radioactive substances under his bed but what Leo doesn't know won't hurt him probably.

He'll be doing the most basic shit like soldering two wires together or plugging something in and tell his brothers the most insane technobabble possible, just to fuck with them. They think he's god because he turned the router back on when the WiFi stopped working.

He taught Raph how to maintain his shell cycle because he got sick of fixing it everytime Raph broke it.

Do not leave him and Mikey in the same room unsupervised someone will die. They're both unhinged in their own special ways, but they bounce ideas off each other in the worst way. It'll probably end with copious amounts of nuclear materials and/or explosives.

He puts up with Casey entirely because Raph likes him, at least at the beginning. Casey 100% just walks into everything in his lab. Like walks in, says "what's that" and it immediately breaks. Casey is now banned from the lab lol.

Autism

Definitely has a bunch of random poisons hidden in his ninja gear which he doesn't ever use he promises, Leo

Definitely stronger than he seems. He hauls bits of machinery around all day, if he had any interest in it he would definitely go up against Raph in sheer strength

Will take things literally but that's a hc I have for like... Everyone except April and Mikey

Has very strong opinions about welding. Like he can and will argue for hours about why his specific favourite type is better that everything else.

His computer runs on his very own, patent pending, DonnyOS.

He also invented his own programming language called DonnyScript and it is incomprehensible to everyone except him and made April cry.

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whetstonefires · 6 months

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I hope you're having an excellent day 😊😊😊 What about Wei Wuxian as Naruto?

Thanks! It was pretty good. I organized my embroidery floss and took advantage of being alone in the building to dance around like a maniac for about 20 minutes. My cat hated it. My knees aren't sure they approve either.

Wei Wuxian as Naruto has a lot going for it right out the gate. Orphaned sunshine boy protagonist types, now we're cooking with propane. They're even both fox coded!

However, at the risk of stating the obvious, if Wei Wuxian were Naruto he wouldn't be Naruto anymore. That is. Fundamental to Wei Wuxian is that he is brilliant and talented and he damn well knows it. He would excel without effort in ninja school--not as much as he did in Jiang Sect unless he unlike Naruto was still getting personal mentoring in honor of his late father, but still.

Difference is, when this Wei Wuxian slacks off in class and the teacher tries to embarrass him, if he reels off the correct answer and then reinvents senjutsu from first principles in a creepy-sounding way for a lark just to show off, the teacher is not going to think that he's just like his annoying late mother. (Though he'll still have one. Kushina and Cangse Sanren are fairly similar Dead Mom archetypes too.)

The teacher is going to think things like, no real child would say that shit and I'm expected to teach the monster fox that killed my family basic ninjutsu I hate this I hate this we're all gonna die.

So basically this Wei Wuxian gets his Yiling Laozu reputation mod as part of the starter pack. I don't think he'd handle it super gracefully! But not the worst, either.

Not even as badly as he did in the actual version, probably, on account of he doesn't know his own dark secret. So he can't self-isolate to protect it. Though him pulling away from people once he does learn would be cool.

He'd probably have forged slightly stronger social ties rather sooner than Naruto did, even if he was just as neglected and radioactive; Wei Wuxian doesn't care what people think of him nearly as much as Naruto does, but in some ways he's a more genuinely social person, and he's got much better social intuition, so it's easier for him to figure out what people want and either do that or not do that on purpose.

He'd have at least a bunch of casual friends. Mostly civilians, and other kids from ninja school whose parents told them not to play with him but they did anyway.

Wei Wuxian cannot do therapy no jutsu. He does not have that ability to confront and exist with emotional discomfort or that intensity of interest in what is going on with other people.

He does however have some level of Friendship Beam Attack (the plot to some extent hinges utterly on how effectively it hit Wen Ning) and it would presumably be more effective, in a shounen context.

But that's the thing, Wei Wuxian isn't really built to confront shounen manga style problems. Or, well, he is, but he's overbuilt for them; they're his bread and butter. One of Naruto's key motifs, early on at least before we got into the heavy power creep, is not being a genius.

Wei Wuxian, by definition, is a genius. He is the kind of guy who walks up to shounen manga sorts of problems scaled to what ought to be his level, handles them, and goes 'what, like it's hard?'

Wei Wuxian is designed to be destroyed not by external threats but by his own loyalties, politics, and lies. (Which was a point of confluence with Itachi I didn't really touch on because the flow was so different lmao.)

He's also, otoh, designed to be destroyed. Naruto is designed to start off artificially low and climb steadily up toward heaven. (Ymmv on how this worked out but he sure did escalate.)

You have to pick which schema to apply when performing the fusion--I mean, it's not either-or, the whole deal with Wei Wuxian is he goes through the entire arc of a tragedy and then comes back to life and stars in a romcom. These things can superimpose and stack. But there are structural decisions that have to be made early.

So anyway, Wei Wuxian as Naruto is not going to enter the Genin Team phase of life with the same priorities, even if he has largely conducted himself about the same way hitherto. 'Proving himself' so 'people will accept him' is not a motive that works for this character--you basically have to give him actual precious people earlier just to get him to care about attaining ninja rank at all.

Otherwise he would probably much rather loaf his way through his teens stealing jutsu and making trouble. Which is the well-adjusted reaction to the idea of becoming a child soldier, like. He likes recognition but 'showing off' is a reason he does dumb fun things, not difficult high-commitment ones. He's like if Shikamaru had ADHD and no parents.

Being twelve is going to make him dumber, but I can't see it making him not the kind of person who stops caring about his marks in school if the teacher is hostile.

If Wei Wuxian here isn't acting out of appreciation for the Hokage raising him, or something like that, you have to give him a practical motive to enter military service like 'Konoha stops supporting orphans out of the public purse at thirteen so he's got to get some kind of job and ninja is the least boring option' which. Is significantly less like either Naruto or Wei Wuxian in terms of reasons to do anything, and starts getting into solidly OC territory.

The whole fact that Konoha's worldbuilding centers around an attempt to move away from decentralized clannish social organization and promote the idea of shared, communal social institutions and (in theory) civil society, and the ways this does and does not work out for people especially considering it is still a relatively small military dictatorship, honestly interfaces super interestingly with how, in Mo Dao Zu Shi, one of the underlying challenges backstopping all character choice is that there is no feasible alternative to the clan system, and you have to pick a family-faction to depend upon and submit yourself to, or face the world with no safety net.

Like. Huh.

.....Kishimoto is honestly unusually-for-shounen well-grounded in the genres he's riffing on tbh, for all my bitching there were some very good reasons his work found such success; I would have liked to see what kind of story he produced without the insane pressures of the Weekly part of Weekly Shounen Jump. I wonder if he'll ever publish again. For all I know he already is lmao.

So anyway, however we manage it we get Wei Wuxian on his genin team with like. Lan Wangji and Mianmian or whoever. Actually that's hilarious. Yeah, make it lwj and lqy, both of them so done with his shit.

Setting up some wild role-reversal here--Lan Wangji being the one to go Away and Wei Wuxian asking him to stay? Or Naruto-person leaving into the dark, and Sasuke-person remaining and calling for him to come back? Either way. Getting some inversion. Tasty.

Where does this leave Jiang Cheng, though? Because in a lot of ways Uchiha 'Deuteragonist by Editorial Mandate' Sasuke is straddling both roles.

In many ways Wangxian is much more like if Naruto had an endgame romance with Neji. Which is a great ship tbh, I saw very little of it back in the day?? In a series with a smaller cast or with less Sasuke Creep (not sasuke being a creep, it's like power creep) it would probably have done numbers.

...Naruto going away for that timeskip really limited his opportunity to make connections in the village huh.

I guess it depends on the kind of narrative you're trying to put together. On one hand, you can do Jiang Fengmian as the rather-more-involved Third Hokage, with Jiang Cheng as an aged-up Konohamaru kind of figure. And then Jiang Yanli is standing in as both Iruka and. I know I know the ramen guy's name. Ichiraku. Soup! XD Emotionally significant soup!

But with a different backstory than either lmao. Kurama very possibly killed Yu Ziyuan in this universe, though I can't visualize her as a midwife.

[[[Why do I have so much Naruto lore on tap, there is no life value in knowing Sarutobi Hiruzen's wife was at ground zero of the Kyuubi attack because she was the expert overseeing Uzumaki Kushina's childbirth a;kdj;lafdks. I do not remember the things I was actually studying in high school nearly this well.]]]

(Actually Jin Ling is Konohamaru and Jiang Cheng is aged-down Asuma. But whatever.)

And in this case Wei Wuxian's genin team is Lan Wangji and Mianmian under idk who. Lan Qiren, possibly, although he seems more the Ebisu type. Lan Xichen? (It's not like he can serve as a plausible Itachi. Can you imagine.) Actual Kakashi, possibly; we can't replace everyone with mdzs characters; the cast sizes don't square.

Kakashi training Wei Wuxian is very funny to think about. He deserves this.

Or on the other hand for a different pacing and focus, the genin team is him, Jiang Cheng, and Jiang Yanli under Jiang Fengmian, who dies sometime after or probably during the climax of the chuunin exams. And Sarutobi stays Hokage, and probably doesn't die during the chuunin exams. And we aim for a Naruto/Neji kind of romance storyline lol.

What is the Lan Wangji equivalent of Neji exposing his caged bird seal in front of god and everybody and ranting (it is very unclear at what effective volume though you'd think the proctors would have shut him up if he could be heard from the stadium seating that shit was sedition) about his traumatic backstory and the deep injustices in his family's system of hierarchy? I'm gonna say Not That.

Wei Wuxian versus Lan Wangji important ideological-conflict bonding duel in the Chuunin exam finals sounds excellent though.

Either way Wei Wuxian is going to get much more thoroughly involved in the ugly ninja politics than Naruto ever did, and he's going to hate it so so bad and at least temporarily lose so so so hard. A likely story element is he becomes troublesome enough he winds up having to flee the village ahead of a scheme by Danzou to (fatally) rip the Kyuubi out of him and implant it in some thoroughly conditioned ROOT kid.

Maybe Wen Ning?? Idk. I'm mostly saying this because Wen Ning 1) canonically gets Victimized and Transformed and 2) shares some notes with Sai. And this means he's leaving, in part, for Wen Ning, which ties into some plot and character stuff from their original narrative. You could make it work.

Also him taking the replacement human sacrifice with him when he books it would be hysterical.

Anyway he's branded a missing nin and it is, canonically, illegal for him to tell anyone who doesn't already know about the kyuubi thing, so both Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji are appropriately what the fucking fuck and receive no adequate answer. This is a workable plot element.

Either the Jiangs or the Lans are the Uchiha, here, which has its own story value, lots of fun to be had. Gotta engineer a way he's protecting Jiang Cheng--does Danzou want to make him the jinchuuriki? Is Orochimaru or his replacement making a play for Jiang Cheng's bloodline limit, whatever it is, fun if it's eyeballs, and Wei Wuxian bargains to give him a jinchuuriki instead? Hmmm.

You want an inside and an outside threat, the obvious viper and the political spider, so you can silo information and make sure nobody entirely knows what's going on.

If it's Jiang Cheng who's assigned the role of bloodline limit macguffin, I have the very wicked urge to cast Yu Ziyuan as some combination of Itachi and Obito. Very Vader kind of effect.

Jin Guangyao as Kabuto, excellent, I need that innocent smile and those torture skills. This may require making Jin Guangshan much smarter than he really is just to fill out the ranks, or again you can keep Danzou as himself.

Tsunade is amusingly enough occupying an overlapping Baoshan Sanren and Wen Qing position; given one of them impersonated the other that time you'd have to do something with that. She's also got some Yu Ziyuan vibe up ofc. Tsunade just contains an entire franchise's supply of girlboss tbh.

Who could possibly stand in for Jiraiya, nobody, but at the same time. Wei Wuxian (with internal sapient asshole nuke) apprenticing under Jiraiya of the Sannin sounds like enough problem-creating goofy jackass genius clown energy in one place to open a singularity. That's too much. No narrative could survive.

Anyway someone please feel free to write this, I am intrigued but also will 100percent never ever put in the time it would take to realize any version of this concept.

#ask #hoc est meum #ramblebrambleamble #mdzs #naruto #fusion #meta #ig?????#return of the son of the jane bennet cinematic universe #fanfiction #the thing about protagonists is they require a story #if lwj is neji then mianmian is tenten #who is Rock Lee?#hard work...pays off...but lwj holds him in contempt...there is no such person????#actually it would have to be Wen Ning #he's friends with Wei Wuxian and lwj's petty jealousy grudge is even fiercer and pettier when he is thirteen #haha then wwx casually ships lwj/lqy while lwj resentfully imagines wwx/wql #phantom love triangles that do not exist! two of them!#beautiful #if you need wen ning elsewhere then disrespect rock lee's name and plug su she in as their third #this is so fun and so not productive i have so many other things i should be doing a;ldsksdf;#i play a lot with the dog thing but i'm pretty sure #the number one creative reason wwx is afraid of dogs is just #that's a traditional way for foxes passing as humans to give themselves away #motif~~~~

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welcome-to-the-neotheater · 3 months

Text

Non-Comprehensive List of Things I Love About AJR City Savers

AJR WEBISODE: CITY SAVERS (youtube.com)

keep reading because loooooooooooooooooong post

0:00, I love the implication that they are spending 3/4 of their waking hours on this club and they don't have any free time between that and the band

0:12-0:15, he's holding this box with his bare hands normally for a few good seconds here, and only at the end does he decide that its actually super radioactive and he jerks his hand away from it really fast

0:20 Yeah that's going to help get the paint off

0:23 The old logo looks really weird to me after being used to the current one

0:30 he is so fucking proud of himself for putting a leaf into the trash can

0:35 "We founded this city savers club to protect this fine city we live in", the protection of course being kicking a piece of cardboard about 5 feet

0:38 "We start off at 4:30 in the morning, first item on the agenda, song" They're singing songs for the public, (specifically, the "youth" , 1:10) at 4:30 in the morning, "first item on the agenda"

0:48 none of the children are paying any attention to his song, the only one who even looks at the camera is a parent who, if anything, seems unimpressed

0:52 they did this shit in public

1:06 great camera work there

1:13 "We really feel like it gets our message across"

1:20 this is entirely useless

1:35 Does he have a meterstick? How does he know?

1:37 There's no god damn way they can hear him inside their fast cars, probably with windows up with him speaking at slightly above speaking voice

1:42 "Morning Deb!"

1:46 Outfit change from previous scene, these are different days. He does this regularly.

1:53 "NO!"

1:57 He's no longer doing something useless, this is actually disruptive, as you can tell from the honks

1:59 Unless one was added in the jump cut, you can see in the previous shot there was not, in fact, a baby blue jay's nest right there

1:59 What purpose does the word "baby" in "baby blue jay's nest" serve? Correct me if im not up to date on bird knowledge, but aren't all nests built by adult birds build the nests for their babies? Is he trying to say that the baby blue bird built the nest? I don't think baby birds can build nests. Is he just referring to the fact that the birds that live in the nests are babies? This is either redundant or wrong.

2:05 "I've submitted my application for the city savers club almost a dozen times now... I really hope I get in this month". He has been applying to enter this "club" (it has 2 members and does nothing of value) for almost a year.

2:17 Jack checks behind the curtain as if there's any way Adam was just hiding behind the curtain

2:22 Ryan is already so bored

2:28 I counted a 5 second pause before "What?"

2:40 Their brother attached a headshot in his resume as if they wouldn't know what he looked like.

2:43-48 this is just great

2:05-48 Jack and Ryan have created this fake club and have, for almost a year, been holding this over their older brother's head and having him submit formal applications to join his younger brothers' fake club and they have been denying all of them. If that isn't the most sibling shit out there, I don't know what is

2:48 "Graffiti" is a child's chalk drawing

2:55 "Can't get this out", he's using his shoe to remove washable childs chalk from the street. "Can't get this out" have you tried water??? They have to make that shit so it's easy to get out of children's clothes, and so that it washes away when it rains, if this "graffiti" is such a problem get some water and spray it

3:01 "Surprisingly pigeons don't just eat breadcrumbs". Look, I've never been to New York, but if the pigeons there are anything like seagulls, it should be 0 surprise to someone that's grown up there that the pigeons will eat whatever you give to them.

Idk what those are (skittles?) but they don't look like you should be feeding them to pigeons

3:07, they're feeding chunky peanut butter to the pigeons. naturally

3:12 LEE!!!!!!!

3:18 He runs away immediately after hearing they're going to try to put that sweater on him

3:20 They were already talking to him at an unreasonable distance apart but now even more so as he's gone entirely off screen and they continue to talk normally to him for I counted 7 seconds.

3:27 The cut off "Lee-". How long did they do that for?

3:29 Gotta love the "we're saving the world!" music that comes in here

3:30 Pre 2020 mask

3:33 All of the water has fallen out of his hands before he reaches the plant

3:37-41 I don't know if this was planned, I don't want to know if that was intentional

3:52 Wow! Look at this plant!

Throughout the entirety of this video they do nothing actually helpful for the city (yet continuously act like they're saving the world). Their "good deeds" are either entirely pointless ("traffic control", trying to get rid off the paint with his foot at 0:20, "singing for the youth", "watering" that plant) or actually slightly harmful (blocking some car because of an invisible blue jays nest, refusing to let their brother into the club, feeding shit to pigeons that they should not be doing, trying to get rid of a child's drawing)

Jack stated in an interview once that he's actually afraid of pigeons

Adam is a climate activist now, and I like to think that stemmed from not being allowed into city savers

Damn did I write a lot for a video under 4 minutes. I feel like one of those people that keeps interrupting movies to talk about deeper meanings or explain the jokes now.

#ajr #ajr brothers #ajr songs #maybe my friends are right about me being autistic #oh well

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bunnhwaa · 10 months

Text

two things with Miguel's theory I'm not getting and something everybody else has probably already talked about by now but I need to rant about it because this shit is slowly eating away at my brain:

1. this whole theory was created because Miguel started comparing his situation with Miles's, sparking that whole "don't play a role that wasn't meant for you" attitude, but to me there's a huge plot hole in that mindset - Miles never chose to be spiderman

like the entire reason why those dimensions collapsed was because Miguel went out of his way to travel to another dimension and father a child that wasn't his, that's not comparable to Miles because Miles didn't go out of his way to get bit by a radioactive spider from another dimension, the spider got drawn towards him because of Kingpin's collider and he's been dealing with it in the best way he can. Miles became spiderman because of someone else's actions, which means that for his universe, it was fate. He quite literally couldn't have dealt with that in any other way and it bothers me how Miguel is self projecting onto Miles by insinuating that he doesn't deserve to exist, especially when you consider the fact that there isn't some sort of uniform way that a spiderman is supposed to get bitten, they just get bit a deal with the aftermath.

which then leads to my next point...

2. canon events aren't completely linear, they're single incidents that coincidentally happen to every spiderman

from my perspective, canon events aren't these uniform rules that you have to abide by, they're similarities in the multiverse that just so happen to align because they have a common denominator - someone playing the role as spiderman

like it's not a "every spiderman does this exact same action and goes through these exact same movements and watches someone die in the exact same way" type of thing, it's a "every spiderman watches a police chief they have close relations with die" type of thing, which leaves a ton of room for leniency

(honestly, that by itself contradicts Miguel's "you're not meant to be spiderman" thing because Miles has canon events just like everyone else, which means that being spiderman was his fate, but that's not the main point I'm leaning into)

the way a spiderman goes through a canon event doesn't mean as much as the canon event actually happening, a main example being Miles getting bitten by a spider that technically wasn't his, but still becoming spiderman and going through canon events just like everyone else

so that leads me to ask another question: if all of Miles's other canon events happened without fail, then what did Miguel see in Miles that led him into believing that he'd be able to save his dad if he tried to?

because as far as I'm aware, all of the other spidermen at the very least attempted to save their police chiefs and failed at doing so, they didn't sit back and watch them die like Miguel is tryna force Miles to do: so wouldn't Miguel going to Miles's dimension and fighting him have an effect on Miles's canon event? in a similar way that Miles went to Pavitr's dimension and interrupted Pavitr's canon event by saving his police chief for him?

like obviously I don't think Miguel will go out of his way to save Jefferson, but if Jefferson is supposed to die while Miles tries to save him, then wouldn't stopping Miles from trying to save Jefferson have the opposite effect??

and here's an extra third point that I thought of while typing this all out:

3. if Miguel believes that Miles being an anomaly gives him the potential to break out of canon events, then he's blatantly ignoring the large probability that Miles has the potential to save his dad and everyone in his dimension, not just one or the other

because if Miles has the ability of creating a bad outcome then he has the ability of creating a good outcome, one cannot exist without the other so even if we lean into Miguel's theory, we have to heavily rely on his self projection in order for it to make sense

and this isn't even me getting into the possibility that all of the other spiders likely realized Miguel's theory was off way earlier on (they're super geniuses so I hope they did) but didn't argue against Miguel because of the lingering "what if he's right", that one in a million chance. the fear of the unknown kept them from questioning what didn't make sense and that resulted in them throwing Miles under the bus

wit allat bullshit goin on, I'm honestly not that surprised that Hobie openly supported Miles from the start, that "fear what you don't know" mentality is often used by fascist leaning governments to manipulate the mass populous, and Hobie, living in a fascist apocalyptic society, peeped that shit immediately and dipped from HQ after he made sure Miles was okay on his own

so uh...yeah! Miguel is tweaking and mentally unwell, spiderpeople in general aren't that good with friendships, Miles needs to reconsider his friendship tier list and set some boundaries because that "they won't take care of you and accept you the way we do" line Rio said hit him hard, (I feel like that's an allegory towards blackness and the experience black kids go through when venturing out on our own and finding our place in outside spaces so I might do another post on that but idk), but Hobie's pretty chill so I hope him and Miles become best buds in the next movie that'd be really nice

yup, that's it I think, if you have more to add please do so I'm so hyperfixated on this shit it's kinda insane actually-

(I started typing this out at 7AM and used a fuck ton of colors so I hope this is understandable, if I'm completely off base and misunderstood the whole multiverse thing please call me out cause I wanna understand this shit so badly)

#spiderman itsv #across the spiderverse #miles morales #hobie brown #miguel o'hara #pavitr prabhakar #gwen stacy #peter b parker #multiverse theory #I'm kinda just tagging random shit atp #i hope this reaches the right people #atsv

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corporatefrog · 11 months

Text

꒦‧₊ ꒷ Team Stan w/ a reader who can shapeshift into animals! [Headcannons] ✧.*

✧.* tags: college au, superhero au,

✧.* Charactions: kyle broflovski, stan marsh, kenny mccormick, butters scotch

a/n: this is an old request but i think i was able to get pretty silly with it

masterlist

Kyle

FLYING TOGETHER PLEASE

Imagine soaring through the sky with fucking human kite

And being such a better flyer than him

Literally cliche flying through the clouds and kyle traces his hands through them

“Stop going so high! I can’t gain altitude that fast!”

“Uh… lame power? Get better? Don’t be a human kite?”

“I fucking hate you.”

“SORRY CAN'T HEAR YOU AIR PRESSURE TOO LOUD”

Yall probably fight really well together

He thinks up the plans and you shapeshift and attack

Dynamic duo vibes fr

DROPPING IN ON A VILLAIN FROM ABOVE

BLOCKING OUT THE SUN OR SOME SHIT

Coolest duo

Stan

“Dude I TOLD YOU not to go in the radioactive lake”

“Oh… I thought that was code for go into the radioactive lake”

“In what world is telling you not to do something code for doing it?”

“Uh- YOU CANT CONTROL ME I CAN TURN INTO A BIRD NOW”

Tries to not be impressed because he’s supposed to be annoyed

But he thinks its so fucking cool

Lowkey wanted that to be his power if he could choose anything

After the veal thing he volunteered at animal shelters

This is real because I said so let me be delusional

Asks you to turn into a cat and talk to the other cats to make sure they don’t hate him

Because ferguson always glares at him from the corner and he is NOT interested in being attacked by a bunch of pissed cats

Convinced they’re scheming against him

Still mad at you for going into the radioactive lake though

Kenny

He cannot comprehend it

Like you try explaining it to him and it is just NOT clicking

The only thing that works is telling him it’s like Beast Boy from Teen Titans

“Oh so you can shapeshift into animals while still regaining your consciousness?”

“I literally said that fifteen times- You anger me so much every day.”

Wants to make the teen titans

He is robin (obviously)

Probably has the costume from halloween a few years back

PLEASE turn into a bear and pretend to fight him

He wants to say he fought a bear

And cartman bet him $100 that he couldn’t

Choreographs an entire battles scene in the middle of town

Because it’s not like south park animal control actually does anything

Kenny now owes you 10 favors that can be cashed in whenever needed

Butters

Turning into a tiger whenever he gets bullied and scaring the shit out of whoever is bothering him

(usually it's eric)

Or turning into a little puppy whenever he’s sad

“Everything alright, butters?”

“Oh, it’s nothing.”

“So you don’t want me to turn into a husky and play with a frisbee?”

“Well you didn’t mention that. That changes everything!”

Just being his lil animal buddy

Turning into an elephant walking to a doctors appointment to get there in like 2 seconds

If he’s professor chaos, he refuses to attack when you’re an animal

It’s animal abuse 🙁

He’ll punch you in the face as a person but he REFUSES to hit a cat

Even if you’re a mountain lion lunging at him

Heart of gold fr

Overall

NO ONE TELLS CARTMAN

A rat got into his sock drawer and ripped holes in all of them?

What a shame :( so sorry that happened to you

Suddenly all of his clothes have cat piss on them

How could that have happened??? Poor poor eric

What do you mean you’ve found spider webs everywhere but no spiders? Hopefully there aren’t spider eggs everywhere. That would be terrible.

Really just looking for excuses to ruin cartman’s day

#south park #south park x reader #corporatefrog #stan marsh #butters stotch #kenny mccormick #kyle broflovski

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evilminji · 5 months

Text

New Question Haunting Me

Is the ENTIRE Zone Green or just the region Danny got spat into?

Cause we know Ectoplasm can change colors.

And the Zone IS literally Infinite.

The Caribbean ocean and the Arctic ocean look different, despite both being sea water. And Carbon sure can make ALL SORTS of funny shapes. Does the Zone have Regions? Actually, yes. We know it does.

Better question. Does it have Nebula? Like, WELL beyond plant sized areas. So big, that even with unobstructed view, you can't really see the edge of the color shift?

My brain is telling me? That the most LIKELY scenario? Is because it's Infinte? It's both There and Here. Just? The Zone, Repeated. With this being the Green One. A specific SHADE of many. Countless.

You just? Go 90 at a degree angle while standing still, maybe a little to the back-up-down-turn-left aaaand? Now you are in the Red Zone. Do it again, everything's monochrome. Etc.

Each place has its own Vibe. Probably it's own Monarch.

Likely just one Clockwork.

But? So far? All the Ectoplasm has come from, effectively This Specific Pool? The own closest and easiest to access from their universe. Which happens to be Green.

It could very well be like different gasses, per color. Different energy waves. Pulling different personality types towards different Zones of THE Zone. You very well COULD turn a corner, metaphorically, and find what to the ancients eye looks like Heaven.

Drifting clouds, endless bliss, soft light. All seen through some temporary portal. While another? Holy SHIT. Everything's on FIRE and people are tearing each other apart! Scary and bad! That must be some sort of punishment!

You see enough glimpses of the alien and untranslateable? It gets hard to explain REAL fast. But you become certain of what you know. Filter it through the lense of your experiences and cultural understandings.

Would be interesting to figure out how those glimps even HAPPENED. Was it the metaphysical "weight" of humanity? Slowly sinking Realm in the sea of the Zone until it reaches the correct ectoplasmic density? A way too support the expanding number of Souls being created?

What must, then, they have been able to see? When Humans were new? If the population keeps increasing, will the Portal in Fenton Works start to disconnect? As Reality is dragged down a layer? What effect does that have on the collective subconscious?

If Danny became King of the Green, would he have to stay THERE? Negotiate with the Monarch of where comes next? I have QUESTIONS! I want to STUDY THE GOO! Somebody let me poke the radioactive substance with a STICK!

@the-witchhunter @hypewinter @hdgnj @ailithnight @nerdpoe

#dp lore #the zone #danny phantom #why is it green?

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badsalmonella · 5 months

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Unhinged Guinevere Lancelot propaganda:

- First of all I stan a dysfunctional ship so don't come at me with a write up about how they are not getting a good grade in couples counseling. That's the🤌🏼 SAUCE🤌🏼 for me

- They spends the middle section of the show exchanging catatonic levels of eye contact across a stage the size of a mega mall parking lot and honestly? It's nastier than whatever you can find me on pornhub. FACTS.

- The radioactive levels of VIBES he is giving off when he says "No one can refuse your wish~"

- but the SECOND they actually hook up my guy Lancelot is ON THE FLOOR. In his SLUTTY BLOUSE cross necklace CLUTCHED and Genny is like "....heyyyy..... you're a nice guy 🫤 but uhhhh......"

- If they existed in a modern context Lancelot would be like "post sex waffles???? Shaped like hearts??? M'lady???🥺" And Guinevere would be pulling on the pants, already half way out the door like "no." And Lancelot would idk do some true freak shit like put his hand on the pan to punish himself for low rizz levels

- "Your Majesty~" "jjjjaCk ass". I wish I was joking when I say I lost all class when I saw this live and let out a small yell in my seat AT THE LINCOLN CENTER.

- I do have a bootleg though where he immediately smirks after and I'm taking notes sweetheart. That's going in the diagnosis write up babe. <3

- We gotta unpack the exchange between Arthur and Genny where he calls her out like "uhhh??? I know you don't like the dude but your hate is obsessive 🤨"

- The fact that even Arthur knows what's up. Oh my GOD.

- WHERE IS THE C L A S S GUINEVERE?!??

- The fact that Lancelot apparently just hangs out, outside rooms where Guinevere goes??? But also the second Arthur is like "she's actually coming here right now" he's getting the FUCK out of there.

- Guinevere twirling her hair around her finger like "ohhhh the knights will kill Lancelot? 😍 Murder him dead you say? And then what? 😏 Teehee"

- " yOU'LL OPEN WIDE HIM? 😩💦" I'm also putting that in the notes too girlie.

- Guinevere is like if someone doesn't make me come in the next 5 seconds I'm gonna start killing hostages and Lancelot is like "hey what if no nut November was every month? :)" but that doesn't stop them #lovewins

- I'm constantly torn between I think if Genny called him the specialest lil guy who's going to heaven he'd insta-nut, but also I think you'd get similar results if she called him the saddest wet napkin of a man. Thoughts? Vote below! Kidding

- I KNOW that potato show they attended had RADIOACTIVE vibes. Families were probably there just to see the qualities of a prize winning potato and they were out here idk rubbing pinkies and going on about how King Arthur doesn't give them enough attention :(((

- THE FACT THAT Guinevere is like "why won't someone become ridiculously obsessed with me? :/" and then Lancelot does and she's like "oh GOD not like that" and then he's like "oh ok then I'll leave" and she's like "NOT LIKE THAT EITHER". <3 I love her and she's never done anything wrong ever<3

- I think if we gave them facebook in the middle point of the events of the show, they would be THE MOST ANNOYING PEOPLE on your feed.

- Courtly love is really just medieval edging if you think about it.

- I like how the moment that broke these two, where they decided they couldn't hold back any longer is them speaking mediocre French. He said "terriblement" like THAT and she was like "uGH. I can't NOT fuck him"

- The fact that WAY too many people are aware of their thirst. They just do this shit. In PUBLIC. IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN.

- And I haven't even brought up the King Arthur of it all.... The fact that the guy who likes BIRDS gets around more than these two. INSANE.

- who calls the other Arthur in bed by accident? CALL THE NUMBER BELOW TO CAST YOUR VOTE

#TLDR; I love their cringe fail swag 😌#honestly. not inspired by anything that I am writing AT ALL. don't eorry about it #ohhh will BadSalmonella write something else about Camelot? 🥺 YES. but IT'S NOT GONNA BE #wHAT ANYONE ASKED FOR.#camelot musical #camelot

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seawardboundsammy · 4 months

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thinking about fh dnd classes and here's my list (some homebrew is used, dw its linked :] ) (also this is about them as people, not who they would play in a theoretical game)

Ortega: Battlemaster Fighter. I briefly considered monk for their hand to hand combat style but the tactical techniques of battlemaster and how some of them allow you to help your teammates fit much better

Chen: War Cleric. HERE ME OUT OKAY. Obvious fighter fits him and all but war cleric are incredibly strong and have a ton of buffs. Specifically the fact that his armor was the only thing that could power the dampeners during heartbreak feels like a war cleric. Also the fact that Ortega was marshal instead of him. This doesn't mean he's weaker though, if you've ever played/played with a war cleric you know they're BUSTED

Anathema: Acid dragonborn Barbarian, Path of the Favored. I considered sorcerer but i felt that barbarian fits their tankyness better. One of the abilities is "Favored Presence" which works well with their charm and how people tend to be endeared to them.

Herald: Paladin, Oath of the Crown. This one's from the swordcoast! Shout out to my dear @radioactive-mouse, this one's all him. It's the devotion and the being a hero and being nice but honey when you look at the contract, you work for the government, not the people.

Argent: Barbarian, Path of the Mutant. Kind of a weird one (we did consider eldritch knight) but this one fits her intensity in battle and incredibly impulsive choices (bailing from the party, chasing you down in the sewers, the bridge fight). Also how motivated by anger she can be and how absolutely relentless she is. Path of the Mutant allows you to modify your body during combat to gain an edge, which she literally does its great. (also it fits her backstory and shit)

Dr. Mortum: Armorer Artificer. Come on, what were you expecting? I could have gone with wizard, probably transmutation, but this one is just so perfect.

Finally Sidestep is kinda a weird one, cause it really depends on the step. A very sneaky tactician step might be an arcane trickster rouge, whereas a bombastic and flashy step might be a champion fighter out of pure style. Hell, they could even be a paladin considering the training heroes route and anarchist route!

those are my general ideas but if you have others or disagree, please share them! i would love to here what other people think of fh dnd classes

#if that last bit sounds like bait to add what your step's class would be #thats becuase it ABSOLUTELY is #please pardon all the tags i just like being thorough :]#sammy speaks #fallen hero ortega #ricardo ortega #julia ortega #fhr steel #wei chen #fhr anathema #fhr herald #daniel sullivan #lady argent #fhr argent #doctor mortum #fhr sidestep #fallen hero

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ambrossart · 17 days

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I was wondering if there are rumors surrounding

henry, Victor and belch just like patrick? And what type of rumors ?is it creepy like the rumors about Patrick or is it just some gossip between other teenagers? And what about Evelyn? I honestly find hard to believe there aren't any rumors about her and henry like you said he was the staring type so there are definitely others who caught him staring at her and suspected something

Okay, before jumping in, I just wanna say this: none of the rumors/gossip you’re about to read are “whole school buzzing” kind of rumors. Among the main characters, Patrick is the only “popular” one and even he’s not that popular compared to the actual popular kids like Liz Mueller. Derry High’s got a lot of students, and most of them aren’t too concerned about what a bunch of sophomores are doing. They’ve got their own stuff going on.

Also, nobody can compete with Patrick. Between setting random fires around school and hooking up with just about everyone (including, allegedly, the principal’s wife), this guy can single-handedly keep the rumor mill turning for years. He’s on a whole other level. Patrick may not be popular, but he has reached a certain level of… infamy.

— Henry

Now Henry is also infamous, but not in the fun way that Patrick is. I’ve said this before, but Henry Bowers is radioactive. Most of the students would prefer him to drop out or get expelled—that’s how much they hate him. And it’s not because he’s a bully. Derry’s got plenty of bullies. It’s because he’s so angry and unstable. You can practically feel the rage radiating off of him. It’s very uncomfortable being around Henry. Nobody wants to deal with that.

For that reason, most students aren’t too eager to gossip about him, because if Henry finds out you were talking shit about him, he’s gonna come after you. Period. And for the vast majority of students, the risk simply isn’t worth it. That being said, there’s still some gossip floating around, and this usually comes from bored popular girls who aren’t scared of Henry. People like Greta Bowie, Steph Price, and Manda Bosch. I’m not sure how much of this is going to make it into the story, but at some point, Greta does make up a rumor about Henry and Beverly, just like what happened in the 2017 movie. Greta decides to piggyback off the Manda Bosch rumors in order to hurt Beverly. It’s obviously not true, Henry doesn’t give a shit about some random seventh-grader, but he sees no reason to deny it either, just like he sees no point in denying the current rumor about Manda Bosch. He wants people to think he’s having sex. Lots of sex. It’s way better than having people speculating about his sexuality.

Before moving on, I also want to say this: I think the entire town, on some level, is aware of Henry’s abuse, and they’ve known about it for years. They know it’s there, but they choose not to see it because that would make the situation too complicated and grey. They’d rather believe Henry was born bad. If his dad beats him, it’s probably because he deserves it. It’s very unfortunate.

— Belch

I think the school treats Belch the same way the fandom treats Belch:

Nobody cares about him.

All joking aside, I honestly don’t think people talk about Belch too much. He doesn’t really do anything worthy of gossip. At most, I could see people wondering out loud why he’s still hanging around Henry. As I’ve said in a previous post, Belch is a completely different person when he’s not with Henry, so I could see people being really confused by that friendship. They think he’s better off without him.

— Vic

Vic is kind of in the same boat as Belch. People don’t really spread rumors about him because Vic’s so quiet and keeps to himself.

I do, however, think there’s a small group of girls that like to talk about him amongst each other. Vic’s got a little fanclub going on. Yeah, I imagine there’s a group of like six socially awkward girls that like to talk about him and dare each other to approach him. And when he tells them to fuck off, their hearts get all fluttery. 😂 I won’t elaborate on this any further because I do have some scenes planned for Part 2, but that’s what he’s got going on.

Beyond that, have people seen him talking to Evelyn? Yeah, especially in that math class (which is why Seth wrongfully assumed they were dating). But do they go running to their friends with this information? No, because nobody cares that Victor Criss sometimes talks to Evelyn Tozier. That’s not exactly hot gossip.

— Evelyn

Although Evelyn is the main character of this story, she’s not exactly the main character at school. She’s not popular. In fact, most students find her incredibly annoying (like those people at the bonfire, for instance; they reflect what most people think about Evelyn). Occasionally, mean girls like Steph or Greta spread rumors about her, like the one where she’s addicted to caffeine pills, but that’s about it. Mostly people just make fun of her behind her back. They mock her posters and all her lame anti-bullying campaigns. They laugh when Martin spray-paints the C-word on her locker. It’s all childish stuff like that.

Now you asked if people were suspicious about Henry and Evelyn, if people have noticed Henry staring at her. They absolutely have noticed him staring, but they probably just assume he wants to sleep with her or something (either that or… y'know, kill her. With Henry, that's always a strong possibility). It’s a common cliche, right? The bad boy and the little goodie-two-shoes. Nobody is putting that much thought into it. Nobody is sitting there thinking, “Gee, I wonder if Henry likes her.” They can’t imagine Henry having genuine feelings for anyone, and they definitely can’t picture him dating, especially not someone like Evelyn. Yeah, if Evelyn’s gonna date anyone, it’s gonna be some over-achieving dweeb like Jake Newham. That’s what people assume.

Very few suspect something is going on between Evelyn and Henry.

But some do. Oh, some definitely do…

#bowers gang #henry bowers #patrick hockstetter #victor criss #belch huggins #it stephen king #it 2017 #answered asks #thanks for the ask!#it fanfiction #paper men #ambrossart

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