#if this does end up wholesome though ill be happy with the direction this took

[enablogs]

it does bring up things like cultural values too - i’m not sure how it is in japan, aside from the general sense that being a NEET is likely something looked down on. american culture has that in common. 

i live in a vietnamese household though, and it’s normal culturally for there to be several generations living under one house. but that’s viet culture - i have no idea how it is for japanese culture, y’know?

#ososan liveblog #ososan s3 liveblog #ososan s3e2 #this is definitely nice to see in terms of them not being bashed by characters for being NEETs since inherently that isnt a bad thing #like they THEMSELVES are pretty selfish and highly unmotivated (i dont blame them for being the latter and being selfish isnt inherently bad #) but them being NEETs doesn't add or remove from that #i do wonder where this is gonna go narratively though #there were a lot of red flags that may just have been red herrings to get the audience to raise their hackles in prep for danger #the zoom in on the AIs eyes when they were talking about working and AI being used to handle jobs was also. worrying... #if this does end up wholesome though ill be happy with the direction this took #ososan meta #(in the tags at least) #meta

[aplaceforthesoul]

Anonymous submitted:

So, hello. I have been having some issues linked with my abandonment issues, adhd, and severe anxiety. About 2 years ago, i left a very abusive relationship and, with that, lost a friend i had had since middle school (i am now in my early twenties, as is she.) She wasn’t someone i was extremely close to, but she was someone who i genuinely enjoyed hanging around, and someone who i really aspired to be like. I never told this person about the full extent of the abuse in the relationship because at the time I didn’t want to ruin their friendship because of something i said. She took his side, and that was that.

That’d be fine and dandy if that was it, but i continue to have dreams about talking to her and rekindling our friendship. I reached out on one occasion this year to apologize for involving her in the fiasco that was my breakup, and she has seen it, but never responded to it. She hasn’t blocked me, and it doesn’t seem that she really cares about me at this point, which again, is fine. I just want to know how to stop hyperfixating on this and stop having dreams about it. I don’t think she wants to talk to me anymore for obvious reasons, along with the possibility of my ex having twisted the situation with me in a negative light. Any advice is helpful. If not, feel free to ignore this. Thank you, and have a lovely day.

we’d never ignore messages 0: unless someone sends a message of hate directed towards us, or an ask with just general bigotry, we never ignore or delete messages -- it would defy everything this blog stands for and aims to achieve. <3 

dreams are a very strange phenomenon though, a lot of the time dreaming about an ex friend doesn’t always mean that it’s actually about them. when it comes to ex friends in our past, there’s generally strong feelings involved! and so if we’re going through a situation that might bring out strong emotions (eg. anger, happiness, affection, fear, pain) sometimes your ex friend can manifest in dreams because you have previously associated them with that strong emotion.

so to explain that a bit more, you might be dreaming of rekindling this friendship because you’re feeling a little lonely or isolated at the moment? or maybe you’re really craving a friendship where you feel understood and friends who appreciate what you’ve gone through? who knows, dreams can be very weird sometimes.

it’s a shame that your friendship ended this way, but it does feel like it’s time to fully close the door and focus on moving forward. a potential way to stop hyper-fixing on this, could be to reach out and make some new friends? since covid-19 is still a massive issue at the moment it can be difficult (and probs ill-advised) to be physically social, but there’s still a fair few ways to meet people virtually! you could join facebook groups that you have an interest in, focusing the interest group to your town or city can help? and there’s apps like hey!vina or cliq (more links here) that can be good for meeting new friends too :)

or, maybe making new friends isn’t an issue for you or just not something you’re wanting / needing at the moment, and that’s ok too. if that is the case? then a different way to break the cycle of hyper-fixation could be to ground yourself each morning. so if you wake up again from a dream about her then gently remind yourself that it wasn’t real, it’s not necessarily a true reflection of what you want (or need), and that you deserve wholesome friendships with people who do want you in their lives. shake it off, get up and have a shower, keep your mind busy and engaged on other things. make it a goal to work on acceptance of the ending of this friendship, and finding friendships that are supportive and understanding. I hope this is helpful for you friend, take care xxx

- tash

#advice #submission #ex friend #dreams #abuse #abuse tw #trauma

[oftarotandnoodledragons]

Forty-One: IV The Emperor

The authority of a father to guide and govern the education of his child is a very sacred thing, bestowed by the Almighty, and to be sustained to the uttermost by human law. It is not to be abrogated or abridged, without the most coercive reason. For the parent and the child alike, its maintenance is essential, that their reciprocal relations may be fruitful of happiness and virtue; and no disturbing intervention should be allowed between them whilst those relations are pure and wholesome and conducive to their mutual benefit. - Lord O’Hagan

No organization chart is likely ever to be displayed in a major art museum. What matters is not the chart but the organization. A chart is nothing but an oversimplification which enables people to make sure that they talk about the same things in discussing organization. One never makes. - Peter Drucker, Management

Those he commands, move only in command, Nothing in love: now does he feel his title Hang loose about him, like a giant's robe Upon a dwarfish thief. - William Shakespeare, Macbeth It is the nature of man to build the most complicated cage of rules and regulations in which to trap himself, and then, with equal ingenuity and zest, to bend his brain to the problem of wriggling triumphantly out again. - Bridget Ann Henisch, Fast and Feast: Food in Medieval Society

It’s the New Year, the time of new beginnings. While The Fool would also be apt for this time, this card, The Emperor, reminds me of resolutions and the need to tighten the reins. It took a moment re-reading my notes (as I wrote them before starting this blog), but I think I know what has been signalled and so far, I have heeded it.

As I mentioned at the end of the last entry, The Emperor is all about authority and structure and regulation — indeed, it is with these three nouns that Bunning summarises most of the card. The Emperor’s domain is the land where everything is in its place and there is a place for everything, things run to schedule, commands and those who issue it are respected: the realm of Orderliness. This is a trait that I highly admire and wish I could apply more in my life: my personality leans more towards the spontaneous and unplanned, and generally I will “go with the flow”, as I have highlighted on previous occasions. And yet, I thrive when things are orderly and structured and neat. This dichotomy can be difficult to deal with, especially when I have been known to be perfectionistic in the past.

What more about The Emperor? I half-wanted to stop writing my analysis here, because I find the succinctness of “Orderliness” to be the perfect descriptor; but, being a Major Arcana onion, it has other meanings. Perhaps the most obvious is that from the Fool’s Journey: this card is the Yang to the Empress’s Yin. If she is the mother figure, then here is Daddy. And thus, it can help to think of this card as being fatherly, especially in a slightly more traditional sense. A mother always seems closer to their child than their father: he is a little more distant, similar to the gap between the Emperor and his subjects. He is the one who lays down the law, who places the expectations upon his children. He is the authority of the family. The father explains, guides and directs. Paschkis literally depicts The Emperor as a bright red boot with a military-style cap: i.e., the one who wears the boots in the family. Fairchild warns to “Play by the rules and don’t take shortcuts”, the definite law of the land, when this card is upright. In fact, Bunning suggests there could be an encounter with an authority figure or legal matters, even discipline — I half-wondered if there would be a policeman or policewoman involved at New Year!

If we reverse this card, The Emperor is the dictator. Thirteen’s normally simple inversion is more complicated this time, with him saying that we have one who is clutching at power for their own selfish gains, not for the good of their kingdom, who is aggressive because they enjoy the power and love to see their subordinates cower. This is the bad, ill-tempered boss. This is someone who acts on impulse and is inconsistent. Rather than the father, we have the baby.

But, even so, this infant finds itself with an astrological association: Aries. The first starsign, and thus the metaphorical infant: The Emperor has traits of being enthusiastic like a child, guileless like a child, and direct just like a child, too. Remembering back to the King of Wands, we have the fire-like command and inspiration that the fire sign of Aries suggests, but even greater than the King. Indeed, hidden in Paschkis’s cap is the ram’s head symbol. Aries is governed by Mars: a definite vein of masculinity is present here.

Moving away from the personage, we find ourselves back in his realm. But, what is an Emperor without his realm? Thirteen suggests this in one of his Reversal interpretations, suggesting inevitable anarchy at the loss of being organised, with the inability for someone to be in charge. Now, while one could apply this to a more political circumstance, an Emperor without the panoply could even be one “without clothes”. Those in his realm may be just going about their business to keep up appearances. Or, perhaps the Emperor’s authority is blocked, where obedience becomes disrespect, and the fires of motivation aren’t hot enough.

Being upright, we can put the Reversed interpretations aside. Thirteen, though, says that this card asks if one’s Empire has become a chore, and in reflection, I see that in various aspects. While I have taken the energy of the new year and applied it to studying Japanese, I find things like my Ingress community and my story-writing and composition to really be chores. They’re not things that I wish to give up; however, it gives me something to consider. Moving on, Bunning suggests that The Emperor asks “who is in control” of various aspects of one’s life, and that the card can indicate the need for organisation amidst chaos. Around the house, I had been letting others do things and finding them not done, so I have been trying to be more proactive. So, I have been applying The Emperor’s lesson, being the leader of the household and getting things done that need to be done, not because of a lust for power, but exercising my power to do so because it is good for them to be done. It is Orderly. I thrive in an orderly environment. Fairchild says, “Now’s the time to get organised and make plans. Careful use of logic and reason will deliver success.” This what I’ve been trying to do — why? Because order is good; but not at the expense of respect and esteem. Here is my answer to the despondency I felt during The Star Reversed: organisation and orderliness to improve my focus, and to improve my life. If I’m going to get to America to be with Chase, then I must remain disciplined, and I must focus to see The Star through the haze.

It also helps that this encourages me to keep up the journey. This signpost heeded, the next one is the Five of Wands Reversed. Here is the first Five of the journey. I don’t know what lesson is involved, but I look forward to learning it.

#iv the emperor