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#if you’re into it don’t let me bring you down it’s mostly the industry i’m mad at
hellkitepriest · 1 month
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ee @ rough trade nottingham
finally getting to my little roundup several days later, hello. i must say going to nottingham was a real Choice for @shallowtboy and i, because it is not actually that convenient and close like liverpool is, and i mostly justified it with “well i went there to see dutch uncles in december so it’d be rude not to”. but we woke up and got on our stupid early train regardless.
went to an art gallery beforehand, found a copy of mark fisher’s capitalist realism in the gift shop — alex niven first read capitalist realism in january 2010, following a “head-on collision with the music industry”, did you know. saw a very cute pin of kraftwerk-style cats and nearly cried also.
when we queued up outside the venue (venue! it was Just A Shop) there were a good few people there already and we were glad we got down there when we did. doors were meant to be at 12, but they ended up letting us in half an hour later for some reason, which meant by the time we got in we had descended into some cold-induced madness that manifested in us humming the mad stone and bobbing up and down oompa loompa-style to keep warm for just. SO long. this bit would not cease.
we got in, and we weren’t Right at the front but we were close enough, and there was no barrier aside from the flightcases dumped on the ground, and i had to prepare myself for being waaay too close to jonathan higgs. which i WAS. i believe it was albie on here who said that if you’re in the first two rows at any of these shows you will end up making eye contact with this man, and yeah, that only gets truer if he already sorta knows who you are. EMBARRASSING.
it was a good show — not as rowdy and sweaty as liverpool, but what can you expect from a show at midday on a weekday, really. they played teletype at this one(!!! it’s not on my Playlist for nothing), and pizza boy, and i had a bottle of pepsi in my bag and turned to shallowtboy and took a big swig of it at the right moment because really i come to these gigs to have my own incomprehensible kind of fun with my best friend, and it was Funny. only then in the next chorus jon sang “you are afraid / that you’re a pepsi boy” which i did not really register until After, when shallowtboy pointed it out, and i had to contend with the fact jonathan higgs may well have seen me drinking my pepsi (i was about six feet away from him, he probably did,) and decided to make a thing of it. good god. gender win 🤷‍♂️
after the show it was signing time and we all verrry slowly shuffled out into a sort of queue. i took a photo of alex’s pedalboard on the way out, and said “i don’t know why i’m doing this, it’s not as if i know what any of these do”, and their guitar tech (who i have been mentally referring to as Clayton for various reasons, but i believe is actually called joe) overheard and went “neither do i, hah” and then i started chatting to him about what a shame it was that alex didn’t bring his little modular setup on tour this time round, and he told me all about pete’s ableton routing, and it was VERY FUN thank you claytonjoe for engaging with me. pls don’t find out i’m a massive gear poser.
SPEAKING OF— actual signing time. my rubiks cube was in my bag and i was NOT going to leave without it being signed. i managed to somehow barely interact with jon (cursing myself forever that i did not get to ask about the pepsi incident) but they all seemed fairly unsurprised by being asked to sign a rubiks cube, and all wrote their signatures very neatly in one of the little squares, minus jeremy for some reason. and Then.
i was wearing this shirt with the names of two modular synth brands smushed together, based on ONE decade-old post from this one forum that i had decided was the funniest thing in the world, yet another incomprehensible bit i am doing with myself, really, only turns out it’s the modular synth brands alex robertshaw uses the most. it came up on that podcast he did the other day. it was a real “oh for fucks sake” moment. so i showed him my shirt, and told him as much, and i expected there to be QUESTIONS about why the hell this shirt would exist, but he just thought it was great. (jeremy also approved, and said he saw me wearing it in liverpool. i did not interact with jeremy in liverpool. i was not even standing NEAR jeremy in liverpool.) alex then asked if he could take a photo to send to the guy he did the podcast with. YEAH OKAY SURE WHY WOULDN’T THIS NONSENSE BE HAPPENING TO ME. but he didn’t have his phone with him, i guess?? so he had to borrow mike’s phone???? so there’s a picture of me on mike spearman’s phone, i guess. hope the synth podcast guy did see it in the end.
writing this all out really does make it sound about twenty times more bizarre than it felt at the time. i love this ridiculous weirdo band. /\
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pleathewrites · 1 month
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bellow the fire into my deadened lungs
chapter 1 excerpt — what are your thoughts on child abuse? + burncare read full story here
September
Meeting semi-regularly with Hawks has been… ‘Strange,’ Dabi thinks. 
The Number Two’s got a bad temper, hates being out of the loop, and hates it more when Dabi can’t be bothered to spare more than a few words at him. Dabi mostly makes Hawks do small jobs — gather bits of mild information and tail certain lower-ranked heroes. Dabi doesn’t ask for any top secrets because he has a feeling Hawks would only feed him lies. ‘Why?’ Because that’s what Dabi does. 
But the Bird has interesting thoughts. 
Dabi will admit — seeing Hawks’ speech during the Hero Ranking ceremony was wildly entertaining. Dabi assumed the hero had a flair for the dramatic, but he never thought the guy would be so bold to make such a scene on national live television. 
“Who’s gonna be happy hearing that? Stain?”
Dabi remembers Spinner’s spit-take at Hawks’ interruption of Edgeshot trying to seem oh, so humble. 
“You don’t think we need to change how we do things?... Why are those less accomplished than me playing it safe?”
Dabi remembers the way Toga’s eyes sparkled, the way even Shigaraki started to tilt his head in consideration. Dabi thinks the raining feathers were a bit over the top since the guy was already fucking floating, but he’ll admit it was a nice touch.
But his favorite — “Now, go ahead, Number One Hero, with a lower approval rating than me.”
Dabi actually let out a snort, at that one. 
It’s been a few weeks since that broadcast, but ever since, Dabi’s interest in the hero has been considerably piqued. 
He sent Hawks a set of coordinates and a time to meet about an hour ago. He’s late himself, but only by thirty minutes, and, well, he’s a villain.
He immediately spots the stupid little bird because, in an industrial town full of grey, that stupid yellow suit is an absolute eyesore. 
“You don’t own any other clothes, Hero?” 
Back turned, with only crimson wings in his view, Dabi hoped the guy would have jumped. Dabi’s been told he can be as quiet as a ghost, but then he remembers Hawks telling him something about telepathic feathers and sound vibration. 
“Dabi!” Hawks twirls halfway with that stupid grin of his, “You’re actually early. For you.”
“Say my name louder, would you. Might as well dial up the Commission right now and let ‘em know you turned, while you’re at it,” The words are worried, but Dabi’s tone stays neutral because they both know the Commission is already informed about every single one of their meetings. It’s just Hawks who thinks Dabi’s dumb as rocks. 
“We’re in a literal alleyway in one of the sketchiest towns in Japan, dude.”
“Tch,” Dabi’s nose scrunches in a sneer, ‘Of course he’d consider this town to be sketchy, just because it’s a little run down.’
Hawks scratches at the back of his head, “Though, I guess you got a point. I — uh, heh, I didn’t have time to change. Patrol and all.” 
Dabi deadpans, “You can spare ten minutes. It’s not gonna kill you,” and Hawks still looks weirdly apologetic so he adds on, “Birdy, you’re acting like I’m the one who’s gonna be waitin’ up on you. Has that been the trend, so far?”
“You know, now that you bring it up…” And Dabi just thinks, ‘oh, Gods, no,’ while Hawks puts a gloved finger to his chin, “Why are you always late?”
Dabi doesn’t answer. 
Hawks puts his hands up in mock surrender, “Alright, fine. Be mysterious, whatever,” Then clasps his hands behind his back. Dabi thinks that’ll be the end of that, but Hawks loves the sound of his own voice too much, “You villains are so dramatic.”
Dabi gapes, and lays his hand over his chest in offense, “I’m dramatic?” He scoffs — he cannot stand half the shit that comes out of this smart-ass’s mouth. His hand leaves his chest to point at the Number Two, “This coming from the guy that not only interrupted a rank ceremony but made it rain feathers while he did it? Braggin’ about his own approval rating while floating in the fuckin’ air?”
And — ‘oh shit’ — Dabi should have kept his mouth shut. 
Because he sees the bastard’s golden eyes fucking gleam, and crimson feathers ruffle, “Eh? You keepin’ tabs on me, Hot Stuff?” and he starts to lean in, close enough for Dabi to feel the need to reel back, his nose a mere inch away from Dabi’s own, “Ya like watchin’ me?” Pale eyelashes flutter.
Dabi’s had enough. 
He hears a muffled ‘oomph!’ as his scarred hand pushes Hawks’ face away, “Don’t fuckin’ flatter yourself, the ceremony was national news.”
Hawks pulls back and laughs a little. It’s a breathy sound, almost a rumble with how deep the guy’s voice is, but it’s always quiet. Tired. 
Dabi’s stomach chooses that moment to let out a loud and horrifying grumble. 
Hawks’ bushy eyebrow lifts in question, and Dabi can feel the blood gather in his cheeks, humiliation warming his usually cool skin. 
“So, there is a reason you look like a bag of bones,” Hawks says.
Dabi knows the guy is trying to be cheeky, but it hits harder than intended because, ‘Yeah, I haven’t eaten all fuckin’ day,’ and the only thing he does remember eating is cheap instant udon, yesterday. He put a boiled egg in it for protein, but that stuff only goes so far.
Luckily, Hawks continues without needing a response from Dabi, “C’mon, I’m hungry, too, and I saw a chicken place around here. On me, the place is probably cheap, anyway, considering,” and waves his hand around broadly, referring to their current location.
Usually, this is the part where ‘Person B’ says something like, ‘I don’t need your charity!’ but Dabi isn’t prideful enough to deny free sustenance, especially since he can’t even remember the last time he ate real meat. 
So, he shrugs, “Lead the way. But first, button up your fuckin’ jacket and take off your glasses, for fuck’s sake. I know you can move your feathers, so — I dunno, move ‘em under your jacket, or somethin’. Hide them.”
And Hawks actually has the audacity to pout, “I hate compressing my wings.”
“Gods,” Dabi groans to the sky, “It’s just for the walk there.”
After grumbling some more, mostly to himself, Hawks relents and leads the way to a mostly empty chicken shop with neon signs and shiny wooden floors. They sit in a booth at the farthest corner, and order. 
Hawks is somewhat right — food is cheap in a town like this. Dabi’s not well-versed in all things economics, but he knows an underfunded town is a wanted-villain’s safest haven. The residents of such towns rarely call for police — police mean heroes, and heroes mean collateral damage; the residents of this town already struggle to make ends meet with their healthy bodies and standing businesses. One bad fight can end in dozens of collapsed buildings, and an overflow of the nearest already-at-capacity hospital. 
‘As long as you don’t cause too much trouble, the residents here won’t even bat an eye at you, no matter how wanted you are.’
Dabi takes off his facemask and hood when their food is served, and Hawks lets his wings out with a ruffle. The hero begins to dig in, but his gloves stay on.
“Isn’t this cannibalism, for you?”
The previous expression of excitement on Hawks’ face drops, “Ha ha. You’re so clever. I’ve never heard that one before.”
“Fuck off.”
“No, seriously, you should be a comedian.”
“Go to hell. It was actually a semi-serious question.”
A smile quirks at the corner of Hawks’ lips, “Just let me eat in peace, man.”
And so, they eat for a bit, mostly in silence, until Dabi decides the silence feels suffocating. Hawks isn’t asking any questions, not his usual, ‘so whaddya got for me, today?’ and it leaves Dabi with his own thoughts.
After finishing about half his plate, Dabi finally asks what’s been on his mind since watching the Bird on television. 
“What are your thoughts on child abuse?” 
Hawks freezes, a chicken piece halfway through his open mouth when he looks up at Dabi, muffling out, “What?” 
Dabi lets his chin rest on his palm, curling his greasy fingers inwards to avoid his seams, “Humor me, Hero. Got a penny if ya need one.” 
Hawks swallows and puts down his fork — ‘eating chicken wings with fuckin’ utensils, what a priss.’ 
“Uh, gonna need a little bit more context here, man…”
He looks so wary.
Dabi sighs and spells it out for the dumb bird, “What would you do, as a hero, if you received a report of child abuse?”
Hawks takes a moment, scratching at his goatee, “Well, investigate, then hopefully make an arrest,” He shrugs, “Abusers should be jailed. I dunno what you want from me beyond that. Random question, dude.”
Dabi, more or less, ignores the confusion in Hawks’ eyes, but he does take note of how Hawks hasn’t continued eating. The hero is sat back, waiting for Dabi to provide the clearly missing context. 
Dabi has to know what kind of person he’s dealing with, because meeting Hawks this past month and seeing his actions on live television make Dabi… tentatively hopeful — about what, he’s not sure, but Dabi doesn’t like surprises, so he has to ask.
“Mm. But, what if that same abuser shows kindness to everyone else, outside those few people?” 
At that, Hawks lets out a scoff, “It’s usually an act, man. Why are you asking me this? I mean, like, yes, yeah it doesn’t matter if they treat others differently. Doesn’t make up for what they’re doing, the people they’re hurting.”
“Uh-huh,” Dabi’s eyes never leave Hawks’ face, noting the expressive curl of blonde eyebrows, bushed up in earnest to match his glinting frown, “And if other people are, say, ‘counting on them’?”
Those blond eyebrows furrow closer, wild hairs almost touching, “What do you mean?” 
Dabi tilts his head away from the palm it rests on and unfurls those fingers one-by-one to count off, “World leaders, presidents, peace figures.... heroes,” and even Dabi knows his voice took a sharp turn at the last item, and he doubts Hawks had missed it.
“I… No, no, it’s still wrong. It’s complicated, yeah, but... it doesn’t matter how much good someone does if that same person is going off to abuse someone else. Especially their own family.”
Dabi doesn’t know why, but hearing that come from a hero does something to him, speaks to a too-short past life, and validates the soft blindspot of his otherwise iron conscience.
Dabi picks off a piece of his own chicken and takes a bite, “Yeah, we’ll see.”
Meanwhile, Hawks looks completely out of sorts. He’s biting his lip, his hand coming up to rub the knuckle of his gloved index right underneath it. 
Dabi waits. 
“I… I didn’t spend a lot of my life with my birth parents. They were abusive. And they were… y’know, what everyone would call ‘bad people’. Drug addicts, thieves. Probably other things, too, I dunno,” and Dabi is listening to every single word, food completely forgotten. Hawks isn’t looking at him, lidded eyes are directed more towards Dabi’s shoulder, and that’s okay because Dabi hasn’t spoken a single word of his own abuse, so he’s not going to judge how others do it. 
The blond’s head shakes, “Ah,” and clearing gold eyes look back to Dabi, “Point is, even they didn’t face consequences for what they did to me. My dad… He’s in jail, but it’s not for what he did to me. And my mom… Commission paid her a hefty check to adopt me, so she's probably off living an even better life — or maybe dead from overdose, I dunno.” 
“Sounds hard,” it’s a shitty response, but Dabi doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t want to reveal his own story, but for all that’s broken and wrong and rotted inside of him, he still feels empathy towards this guy, towards the Number Two Hero.
‘Birds of a feather, ‘n all that.’
“Yeah, well. Just makes me think, if apparently ‘bad people’ can get away with the crime of child abuse — people with practically zero social or economic influence — then, how do the same institutions hold someone with real status accountable?”
Against his desire to appear aloof, Dabi feels the sharp tug of his own lips pulling into a small smile, “Askin’ all the right questions. Best ones have no answer.”
Hawks laughs, and it's the same one as the alley, low and quiet. Soft. 
Dabi wonders if the guy lets himself laugh often. He smiles a lot, that’s for certain, but smiles are always easier to fake than laughter.  
“I have a feeling a lot of villains have this kind of backstory, or something similar, huh.”
“As you?” Dabi raises a brow, the easiest kind of expression he can do to the lack of staples there, a constant reminder of his ‘backstory,’ like he’s a fucking manga character,  “Maybe. ‘Cept they weren’t saved by anyone. No one’s jumpin’ up and down to take care of us. That’s the difference between us,” his index finger flicking back-and-forth in the space between them, “Heroes ‘n villains.”
The laugh that leaves Hawks is wrong this time. It’s bitter and booming — dark, and not nearly as lovely as Dabi found the others.
“Saved. Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.”
Dabi’s stomach churns something sick. He hopes it’s the chicken.
*
The next time Dabi is supposed to meet Hawks, the skin around the staples of his hands feels like it’s on fire. Red, itchy, and, ‘Oh Gods,’ Dabi thinks he’s starting to see something white seep out the seam of his right wrist.  
He used up the last of his supplies two weeks ago. Right now, the only things he has in his apartment are gauze, soap, and tap water that can be boiled. 
Dabi thinks about calling one of the League members, any of them, but after Kamino, there’s been wanted posters of their faces plastered everywhere, mostly definitely around cities nice enough to have open pharmacies.
He calls Hawks. 
“Hello! Where are ya, hot stuff? I’ve been waitin’ for half an hour, and I even took the time to change my clothes.”
Dabi rolls his eyes at the nickname and grips the phone tighter. It makes his wrist burn. He doesn’t waste any time, “Do you have access to any antiseptics or disinfectants right now? Strong ones. Or maybe even antibiotics, like silver sulfadiazine?”
“Burn cream? Uh… not, like, I don’t have any on me. I could get some? Is everything alright?”
Dabi closes his eyes and rubs his brow, “Yeah, I’m gonna send you some new coordinates. Bring the supplies here. And hurry.”
He hangs up and sets to boiling some water. 
Three loud knocks later echo through Dabi’s apartment, and he yells, “Come in!” as he pats his wrists dry with a paper towel. 
“Dabi?” Hawks’ voice rings through the apartment and his large wings come into view from where Dabi stands in the kitchen. Hawks takes his shoes off at the entryway — ‘how well mannered.’ — and perks up when he spots the scarred man.
“Hey! So, I got an assortment of things. Hydrogen peroxide, saline, antibacterial ointment, got the silver sulfadiazine like you asked — that shit is expensive without a coupon — and, oh! I got these, like, film coverings, pharmacist calls ‘em ‘nanocrystalline silver dressing’ , supposed to be better for fighting infection,” He shrugs, “I also went ahead and got some other things like gauze, dressing, Q-tips, pins,” and sets the plastic bag on the countertop,  “Here, take a look.”
Dabi does, with his eyes because he doesn’t want his freshly cleaned wrists getting even more infected with whatever bacteria could be on the plastic bag or any of these items. 
“... Damn. Thanks, Birdy,” He’s honestly shocked Hawks got this much stuff. 
He ignores the way his heart beats faster, ‘Might finally be the sepsis.’
When Dabi looks back up at the guy, his feathers are wiggling again, something Dabi has come to understand what the hero does when he’s somewhat pleased, “Uh, can you wash your hands over there in the sink and pull out the… Hm, the silver dressing, white dressing, and the gauze? Just set it on the counter, I’ll be right back.”
Dabi walks over to his bathroom, hearing the affirmative, “Sure!” from the hero, and closes the door with his elbow. 
He needs a minute. 
‘I can’t believe I just let an undercover hero into my apartment. Am I going to have to move? Fuck… fuck, fuck!’
“Shit,” he whispers to himself as he opens his medicine cabinet and fetches a pair of tweezers and a box of latex gloves.
‘I can’t believe he bought all that stuff. Dude’s loaded, that’s fine and all, but… what the fuck? I only asked for the burn cream…’ 
Dabi shakes his head, closes the medicine cabinet, and is greeted with the reflection of his own confused expression, etched by a small crack at the upper left side. He takes a minute to look at the man staring back at him, looking at his scars and his freshly dyed roots. He knows he’s a frightening sight, something out of nightmares and horror movies. 
He hates looking at himself, sometimes. He knows others do, too. 
Some nights, the vulnerability of his upsettingly-human psyche will claw its way out like the vicious beast it is, and force him to understand his loneliness. On those nights, he will understand why people turned away a half-dead teen, why store owners chased him out with their bats and mops, and why heroes will always, always attack on-sight upon seeing Dabi’s face. 
He will understand why the League’s bar is really the one place he can ever sip his drink in peace and enjoy the burn at the back of his throat without some prick trying to slip him paper bills in exchange for things he can’t even say out loud. On those nights, the righteous anger will leave his body like steam from boiling water, and leave him hollow and cold and so, very, very alone. 
He wonders if tonight will be one of those nights. 
“Uh, Dabi? You alright in there?”
Dabi blinks out and away from his reflection, ‘Maybe not,’ and leaves his bathroom. 
When he comes back to the kitchen, all the supplies he asked for are out and ready to use. Hawks sits on Dabi’s only stool, waiting.
Dabi didn’t get a chance to really look at the guy, until now. The hero did end up changing his attire for tonight — black sweatshirt, normal jeans that are still on the baggier side, and black boots closer to the kind in fashion magazines than those hideously yellow rainboots he normally tends to wear. When Dabi lifts his eyes back up, he notices the hero’s hair looks a bit different, a little more chaotic, and a little less stiff — it looks soft. 
‘Oh, pull it fucking together.’
Dabi clears his throat and hands over the box of latex gloves, “Do you mind helping me out? I just need you to do this wrist, and then I can work on the other.”
Hawks is nodding and stretching the gloves over his hands before Dabi even finishes his sentence. 
“Y’know, your place isn’t anything like I’d thought it’d be. ‘S nice. Clean.” 
Dabi hears a snap! and a muttered, “shit.”
He opens his mouth to ask what’s wrong before he looks at Hawks’ hand, and sees matte black claws curving out fingers loosely lined with tattered blue latex.
“Oh.”
“Heh,” Hawks laughs, a bit nervously, “Sorry ‘bout that. My own gloves are so thick, I forget I have these.”
“Why am I just now seeing these?” Dabi wonders out loud, eyes glued to the tips of talons he could have sworn that, for a split second, sparkled at him, “Shit. Those are fucking sharp, man. You’re tellin’ me you don’t fight with ‘em?” He doesn’t really pay attention to broadcasts of hero fights but from the ones he’s seen, the Number Two’s hands were always gloved.
“Ah,” Hawks starts to pull a fresh latex glove over his hand again, leaving some space between the ends of each finger for his talons this time, “That wouldn’t be very heroic, would it? There’d be a lot of… blood. Kids don’t need to see that kind of gore in the news, y’know.”
Dabi raises an eyebrow, “I… guess....” 
Honestly, Dabi thinks that’s a bullshit excuse, to not use something so clearly advantageous in serious combat, especially when the hero's life is on the line practically every day, ‘Even if he doesn’t want to use them, why does he cover them?’
He lets the matter be, for now, and looks over the directions on the box of the nanocrystalline silver dressing. He reads it twice, just to make sure. 
Hawks speaks up, apparently needing to hear his own voice again, “The directions say that for exudative wounds, you should apply the dressing dry.”
“Yeah, I see that.”
“So... Let’s get started!” 
Dabi huffs. He hates that he needs help but he’s always been shit with his right hand, and he doesn’t want to risk dropping anything. He lays his left hand out towards Hawks and critically watches every move the man makes. 
Hawks is extremely gentle, and he dresses the wound as if he’s done this a thousand times over. The hero’s eyes never leave Dabi’s wrist, except for the few times he’d go over and read the instructions again to make sure he’s doing everything right. He cradles Dabi’s forearm with one hand as he uses the other to smooth the silver dressing on, the pressure of his fingers light around the staples and firm around the skin. After he applies the secondary dressing, he briefly looks up at Dabi to ask, “You alright?” 
Dabi can only nod. 
When the gauze is wrapped and firmly pinned in place, Hawks finally lets go and Dabi takes a step back to breathe.  
He immediately sets to work on his other hand, moistening the silver dressing with the clean water he’d boiled earlier on. 
“You sure you don’t want help with the other hand? I’ve been trained in this kinda stuff, first aid. I don’t mind.”
‘Well, that explains a little.’  
Still, Dabi shakes his head, “I prefer to do it myself,” and there’s truth in that, it’s the absolute truth, Dabi likes to do things himself. He likes things done his way, and he doesn’t like being touched. 
But the gentle feeling of Hawks’ fingers on his skin urges him to reconsider. 
He won’t, but some part of him wishes he would. 
As he starts to apply the silver dressing with his tweezers, he hears Hawks ask, “Can I ask you something really personal? Like, probably boundary-crossing?”
Dabi’s eyes never leave his working hands, “You got a lot of nerve, Birdbrain, thinkin’ we’re cool like that.”
He hears a small squawk, “C’mon, dude! I’m in your apartment, per your request! I think we’re along the lines of something, ‘like that’.”
Dabi snorts, “I won’t stop you, but don’t be surprised if I tell you to fuck off.”
Hawks laughs — the same small breathy one that makes Dabi’s own mouth quirk up.
Hawks asks why his body is full of scars.  
And Dabi… Well, every passing day, Dabi feels himself getting closer to death and, tonight, it makes his lips a little loose. Maybe he just wants someone to know his story, maybe he wants to try saying it out loud. And if he’s gonna tell his tale, it might as well be in the company of his favorite little double-agent.
When he finishes wrapping up the gauze around his right wrist, he digs for the cigarette packet deep in his pocket, takes out a stick, and lights it up. 
“My father,” He begins, “He’s the reason I’m like this, the reason I look like this, act this way. I know the whole ‘daddy issues’ thing is overrated but, well,” He shrugs, not daring to look up from his apartment floor. He takes another puff, the nicotine in his veins calming him, the smoke down his throat grounding him. He remembers his conviction, “That man took everything from me, left me like this, and he only ever got rewarded.”
He briefly glances at Hawks, the man’s gold eyes filled with an empathetic sorrow that only people like them could give each other, “I’m sorry.”
Dabi shakes his head and looks away, because he can’t deal with this, can’t have someone looking at him like that, not after all these years, “Not your fault. Nothing to be sorry for.”
“He’ll burn,” Hawks says, and Dabi sees the man’s fists clench from the corner of his eye, “Wherever he is, one way or another, he’ll burn.”
Dabi doesn’t know what kind of feelings are running through the hero right now. He thinks that maybe if he looks up, he might see.
‘Is he angry? Is it for me? Does he pity me, feel sorry for me? Is he triggered by my story the way I was by his? Or is he just telling me what he thinks I want to hear?’ — but Dabi doesn’t want to see. 
Because if Hawks only knew who Dabi’s father was, who made him like this, and did this to him, he doesn’t want to know if the hero would look at him the same way gold eyes do now. 
“I don’t wanna talk about this anymore, Birdy.”
Dabi walks over to his worn-out couch and sits down with a tired sigh. Hawks follows. 
For the next ten minutes, Dabi relays small bits and pieces of League information to Hawks, and the hero returns with tidbits of hero business. 
It honestly just feels like a way to fill the time. 
When a moment of silence reaches them, and Dabi’s cigarette has burned all the way through the filter, Dabi speaks up about something he kept quiet to himself last time, “Say, since you asked me a deeply personal question, grant me the same privilege?” 
“Sure, as long as I get the same privilege of tellin’ you to fuck off if I want.”
Dabi snorts and ashes his cigarette, tilts his head towards the hero.
“Was I wrong? Back then, about the Commission saving you?” 
He sees Hawks bite his lips and sink deeper into the sofa cushions, tilting his head back. He sighs, “You’re an observant fucker, aren’t you?”
Dabi smirks, “What villain isn’t?” 
“The ones that get caught.”
And at that, Dabi barks a laugh and is honestly shocked at the sound of it. He thinks Hawks is, too, by the way his blond eyebrows round up, and his previously conflicted eyes soften. 
Hawks lifts one of his clawed hands up, and if Dabi didn’t know better, he’d think the gesture was some kind of show-and-tell, but at the way Hawks’ own eyes glaze over his talons, Dabi thinks the movement is more for the hero’s own comfort. 
“I lied earlier, about the reason I don’t fight with my claws,” Hawks finally says, softly, almost as if he were speaking to himself. 
Dabi knows to keep quiet. 
“I do care about wanting kids to live in a safer world, to… spare them. Of the horrific consequences that come from battles, traumatizing images ‘n all that stuff. Of course, I care about that. But… But I know my abilities. If allowed, I know I’d be able to use my claws in ways that wouldn’t end in some kind of, fucking , feral episode.”
Dabi’s eyebrows slowly knit together, “Allowed?”
Golden eyes flick over to Dabi’s and the vulnerability swirling in them makes the scarred man want… something.
To gasp, reach out, put his own wrapped hands over the talons, and warm them up a bit, just — something.
He’s horrified at these new and intrusive thoughts. 
Instead of doing anything, he waits. 
“The Commission,” Hawks drops his hand to his lap and averts his eyes there, “They have an image of what they believe society wants a hero to look like, along with other things. They… told me they were ‘correcting’ my flaws.”
There’s a beat of heavy, waiting silence.
“They appreciate my quirk — it’s strong and versatile, good for offense, defense, rescue — stuff like that. But they don’t… They hate my raptor genes, the mutations. Like, the only thing I’m allowed to have and show are my wings — everything else has to be hidden or removed. I’m a mutant, but I have to do everything I can to look as ‘humane’ as possible.”
‘What is even considered ‘humane’, in a society of quirked-people?’ 
Dabi is immediately reminded of his hatred towards hero society, “Shit, what the fuck, Birdy. Is that why you wear those stupid-ass gloves?”
Hawks sends a bitter and sad smile to Dabi, “Was the only way to convince them to let me keep my talons. They used to clip ‘em or file them down, but that fucking hurts and they grow back wrong, so. Yeah, got these gloves and told them I’ll never take ‘em off.”
“Tch,” Dabi feels so disgusted right now, at the people who run this society, “So they make you nice ‘n pretty for everyone to look at while they profit of’a’ya. Sick.”
“Yeah, well,” Hawks huffs a laugh, and it’s the one that makes Dabi feel sick to his stomach, “I’m the Number Two Hero, with my own agency! All at the tender age of twenty-four — oops, sorry, twenty-two, Commission fudged my age to make me look even more impressive. An eighteen-year-old success story is prettier than a twenty-year-old one.”
Bile threatens to well up in Dabi’s throat at that — the effort to make this hero fit into society’s obsession with the ‘barely legal’ trope.
“I should be grateful, right?” Hawks bitterly smiles, “Everybody wants to fuck me and every hero wants to be me.”
“Fuck outta here if you’re gonna talk like that, Birdbrain.”
Pink lips bite themselves into a smile, one so much more shy and on the edge of mischievous, “Wanna see my feet?”
“What the fuck?”
He does. He really does.
read full chapter here
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Here's a compilation I made of six different comedians (two per podcast) on three different podcasts saying something about different types of comedy, specially how it's different in Britain and American. Tumblr won't let me embed it even though I compressed it down to be under the max file size, so I'm using a Google Drive. It's just audio, but I made it a video instead of an audio file so I could add text to show what people and podcasts are playing at a given time.
I put those together and then I wrote down a bunch of thoughts about it, which I think start out somewhat coherent but get less so as I go along. It's a whole bunch of stuff I've been thinking about all shoehorned into one post just because they're all on a vaguely similar topic, like a hastily thrown-together Edinburgh show. The point is that I'm going to listen to Mike Birbiglia's albums. That's... that's the upshot. That's how all this started.
I found the chat with Hari Kondabolu especially fascinating, having heard a few of Hari’s comedy specials and albums, and heard him on The Bugle a lot over a bunch of years (also I saw his Problem with Apu documentary, everyone should watch that, and should know that he says all the time on The Bugle he doesn’t get royalties for it anymore so doesn’t mind how people find it, just watch it).
He’s an interesting presence on The Bugle, an outsider as an American, who was there from the very beginning of their reboot in 2016, so you can kind of watch him figure out what this is in real time. At first he audibly has no fucking idea what he’s signed up for, and as it goes along, you can hear him settle into an area of “Well I still don’t really understand why you’re doing this, but I see what it is now and have found a way to do my thing beside your thing and that’s fine.” That’s partly a reaction to Andy Zaltzman, because no one really knows what to do with Andy Zaltzman unless they’ve had a long time to get used to it (except for John Oliver, I’m pretty sure they just met at a student comedy gig in about 1999 and instantly said “Oh look, my comedy soulmate”). But some of it is also a reaction to the British stuff. The references to British politics and history that you get on a topical and political comedy show, and the way they approach all their material. I like hearing Hari Kondabolu on there, an outsider perspective who can pick it apart a bit.
So I found his Comedian’s Comedian podcast interview interesting – honestly the whole thing is worth a listen, even if you don’t really know Hari Kondabolu’s work, as a good analysis of political comedy and the mechanics of good comedy bits and British vs. American comedy and the comedy industry more generally. But for this post, my interest is the British vs. American stuff.
I cut out a big chunk of their Brit vs. American discussion on that episode, and put it in the video above. I debated how long to make the clip, to create what was meant to be a compilation of people discussing British vs. American comedy, and ended up leaving in some stuff that’s a bit off topic where they fawn over Daniel Kitson. I realize comedians fawning over Daniel Kitson is hardly such a rare and exciting event that it needs to be preserved, but I particularly enjoyed hearing Stuart Goldsmith and Hari Kondabolu do it, so I left it in when cutting out the clip. I’ve heard Hari bring up on a couple of other occasions, as well, that he’s wildly impressed and amazed by the Hotmail address.
Anyway though, the Kitson stuff aside, the clip from the Comedian’s Comedian podcast is mostly Hari Kondabolu and Stuart Goldsmith discussing how the Edinburgh Fringe Festival shapes British comedians’ careers into something different from what they are in America. They have to write a new hour every year, because there will be reviewers there who saw last year’s hour and will catch them out if they try to recycle material. Also because it’s a smaller country, so they can only tour one show in so many places before everyone’s heard it and they have to do a new thing. Hari Kondabolu is impressed with the work ethic but mildly horrified by the whole thing, and can point out some aspects of the system that people who are used to it just wouldn’t notice because they seem normal.
I think there are two major factors that mark out the Edinburgh-influenced British model of comedy  careering building as being different from, say, American stuff: the new hour every year and the way each hour has to be themed and coherent and structured and preferably built around some story or message. In Hari Kondabolu’s podcast episode he mainly talked about the new hour every year thing, but also briefly touched on the concept of themes. Stuart Goldsmith mentioned that tides seemed to be changing, as it used to be that themes would make you different and interesting, but not anymore, so they’ll become less common soon. I’ve just spent three weeks listening to 38 shows performed at Edinburgh 2023, and I can say, I’m pretty sure that prediction was inaccurate. Themes and throughlines abound, and I’m happy about that. I like a good theme.
I do think there are pros and cons to it, though, and Hari Kondabolu points out some significant cons. If you look at the list of shows by any British comedy who's been doing Edinburgh for a long time, there are going to be some filler years. Some years when they did a show just because it's a new year and Edinburgh is up there so they'd better write a show, even if they don't have much to say. Hari is right to say that British comedians work fucking hard to turn over a new hour every year, but that doesn't mean the quality will always be top-notch.
Also, themes can be limiting. I'm sure there are some themed shows out there that would be better if they were just freestyle, if the comedian let themselves say all their best stuff, rather than cutting good material due to not being on theme. Or adding weaker material because it is on theme.
So that’s an American going on a British person’s podcast to tell them how fucked up the British comedy system is. I’ve made this compilation to compare it to a British person going on an American’s podcast, in which the American thinks the British system is great and in fact what he wants to do as well. Nish Kumar on Mike Birbiglia’s podcast, from just a couple of years ago. It’s an interesting contrast. A couple of people have told me before that Mike Birbiglia is like a British comedian but in the form of an American person. Including @my-excellent-bicycle, who told me ages ago that he's very good, and I said I'd watch him, and then I didn't, so sorry about that. Absolutely no offence to any of the people who'd already told me about him, but I have to admit, when the "Mike Birbiglia is so cool, he's like an American who does British comedy" endorsement comes from Nish Kumar, that does mean a little extra. Enough so I have now downloaded Mike Birbiglia's stuff, will listen to it next.
I can't really speak to the accuracy of what Nish Kumar said in that clip, since I haven't yet actually heard Mike Birbiglia’s shows. But I see what Nish means. He means shows that are built around one topic and/or narrative and/or theme and/or message, and stay on that, or at least around it and vaguely adjacent to it, for an hour.
Later in the 2021 podcast episode from which I took that Kumar/Birbiglia clip, Nish mentioned that actually, even though this is a generally British thing to do, he personally doesn’t tend to do it much, and he’d like to do it more. That was true, as of then. I’ve heard Nish’s 2014 (might have been originally his 2013 show, actually, whichever one got recorded for the Soho Live thing on Amazon Prime), 2016, and 2019 shows, and none of them were all that structured. They were coherent, particularly the latter two, which stayed on the topic of politics. Even that earlier one had some throughlines and underlying bits that kept coming back. But he didn’t do a really carefully constructed narrative show until 2022, the one that just had a video come out, Your Power Your Control.
So I found it interesting to hear Nish Kumar in 2021, just before he wrote Your Power Your Control, say he’d like to do more narrative-type stuff. And then the next year, he did it. Good for him. Nish Kumar just did a new episode of the Comedian’s Comedian podcast as well – it was recorded very recently, to go with the release of his latest special – and in that one, he mentioned that he was pleased with the way he managed to Birbiglia-fy this show in a way he hadn’t done with previous ones, making it a structured narrative the way Mike Birbiglia does. But actually, the way most British comedians do, and apparently this one American guy that it’s time for me to check out.
Then I added a clip of David O’Doherty from a very recent podcast, in which he talks about getting backlash from Americans for not being what they expect, which is just a bunch of unconnected jokes. I added that clip to the conversation because he brings up Hannah Gadsby and Nannette, and I think that’s an interesting point.
Hannah Gadsby got a huge amount of backlash for Nannette, and most of it was misogynistic. Not all of it, I guess. I guess it’s technically possible for someone to just really not like Hannah Gadsby’s style of humour, and they hated Nannette for perfectly legitimate reasons. Just like probably, some of those people on those cesspits of toxicity that were those Josie Long-related comedy message board threads in 2007, just legitimately did not share her sense of humour. Maybe one or two of them. But mainly, it’s the misogyny.
However, DO’D makes an interesting point about Hannah Gadsby’s show. Most “Edinburgh hour”-style shows do not get as massively world famous as Nannette did. So they got hit with misogynistic backlash, but it was fueled by the fact that it was being seen by a lot of Americans who are not used to that type of comedy, and just don’t understand. They thought Hannah was taking the respectable genre of doing 50 punchlines in 20 minutes, and making a mockery of it. Just because it was the first time they’d seen a comedy show with some sad bits. They thought Hannah Gadsby was doing comedy wrong.
So many people – mostly American people – who saw Nannette didn’t realize that ending a show with 10-15 minutes of sad bits is so commonplace in certain comedy circles that it’s also common to make fun of it. You hear comedians all the time, make jokes about the standard hour that’s funny for a while and then has a sad bit. There’s even a term for it: dead dad show. A dead dad show isn’t just a show about a dead dad. It’s any show that’s funny for a while but also poignant and touching and sentimental and has sad bits at the end and wants to make you cry as well as laugh. People joke about it because it’s been done a lot, it’s been done in some hack ways and some bad ways, it’s also been done in some brilliant ways, it runs the gauntlet like anything else.
It’s fine for people to say they’re not into that kind of thing. But Nannette got so big that people who’d never heard of that genre started seeing it, and they had no idea what they were seeing. So that’s how they ended up saying Hannah is not a comedian, this isn’t comedy, Hannah tricked a comedy-expecting audience into seeing a one-woman show! How dare you bring trauma into a comedy show? As though comedians talking about trauma aren’t a dime a dozen in Britain and Australia.
And I think that has pros and cons too. I like a show that works some serious stuff in, that has some deep personal or political message. But also, sometimes, people have a point when they say a comedy show has focused so much on the personal or political messages/trauma dumping that it forgot to also be funny (not with Nanette, though, people forget that Nanette had lots of good jokes in the first 45 minutes, it was a funny show, people just watch clips that have been cut from the last little bit and are then say this so-called comedy show isn't funny). And I guess it's up to each individual comedy audience member how much humour they'll allow a show to sacrifice for other stuff before they get sick of it. How much sad stuff or angry stuff or introspective stuff or educational stuff or heartwarming stuff or philosophical stuff or narrative stuff a show can have at the expense of funny stuff, before they'll say, "Okay, I need more comedy than this in my comedy shows." But I think it's a pretty shallow view of what comedy can be if you're not okay with a show that has any of that other stuff.
I am conflating Britain/Ireland and Australia/NZ quite a bit in this post, and that’s because I think when it comes to this sort of thing, they’re very similar. I’m also conflating Canada and the US, because I think they’re similar, in that neither of have this tradition that I’m pretty sure developed at Edinburgh and MICF. And I’m not talking about any other countries because as far as my comedy knowledge goes, those may as well be the only ones that exist (sorry Anuvab Pal and Aditi Mittal, I do know a couple from India too, but as far as I can tell, the special type of comedy they do in India is “say some stuff and hope you don’t get arrested for it”).
There is an obvious reason for that: Australia has a festival that’s similar to Edinburgh. British and Irish (and Irish, sorry for having forgotten to add “and Irish” in the earlier bits of this post, I just saw Dara O’Briain’s newest special – called So Where Were We, just released by the BBC, by the way, I recommend it – and it’s chock full of trauma, proving the Irish can do dead dad/never met my dad shows with the best of them) comedians develop their careers around Edinburgh, and Australian/NZ comedians develop their careers around the Melbourne Comedy Festival. North America doesn’t have anything like that.
Obviously North America has yearly festivals too, but not ones that are so big that every single comedian in the area wraps their whole career around it. I think the only one big enough to do that around here would be Just For Laughs, but Just For Laughs isn’t nearly the same thing, since people have to audition for it. You can’t just set up a show and show up. People can’t start writing a show in September with the assumption that they’ll take it to JFL next summer, because unless they’re already very famous, they can’t be sure they’ll be accepted into JFL’s lineup.
I found the David O’Doherty clip interesting, as he lists storytelling shows as just one of the many things that are, in fact, comedy, but get called “this isn’t comedy” by mostly Americans on the internet. But also, it’s not like all Americans just do 50 punchlines in 20 minutes and that’s it. They do lots of stuff! They have alternative comedy there, and at this point I’m getting out of my depth, because I have a sort of idea in my head of what American alternative comedy means – the vague idea involves things like Eugene Mirman and Fred Armisen and Kristen Schaal and improv shows in New York – but I don’t really know what I’m talking about. This post would be better if I knew what I was talking about more.
I guess the basic rule I’m working with is: British/Irish/Aussie/NZ do a new hour every year and it has themes and throughlines and narratives and coherent structure and they workshop it all year and then take it to Edinburgh and then scrap all that material and do a new one. And American comedians just write one joke(/bit/funny story, not just the classic type of one-liner “joke”) at a time, and at any given time are performing the combination of their best crop of jokes, and whenever they write a new joke it replaces the worst one in their set, so they evolve that way. I’m trying to understand why that difference exists, and part of the problem with my efforts to understand that is I don’t really know what I’m talking about, and the other part of the problem is that stating the difference that way is a massive oversimplification. It’s difficult to understand why a phenomenon exists if that phenomenon doesn’t really exist in nearly as simple a way as I’ve stated it here.
I know there are exceptions to that rule I just stated, even though I’ve not listened to any Mike Birbiglia yet. For a really famous example, I watched John Mulaney’s new show Baby J earlier this year (fuck him for the Dave Chapelle thing, the divorce and addiction are his own business and people who don’t know him shouldn’t have tried to get involved in his personal life, but fuck him for the Dave Chapelle thing, I didn’t watch his new show in any way that could translate to view count/profit for him – but I did love all his previous shows and was curious about what’s in the new one so I watched it), and that was pretty much all around one story. Even Hari Kondabolu’s new-ish special has a little bit of a theme, about being political while having a kid. And there are plenty of others, so it’s not like this stuff doesn’t happen in America. And there are plenty of British comedians who just do one joke at a time.
I don’t know – I’m not completely making this dichotomy up, right? That’s why I made that compilation in the video at the top of this post. Other people talking about that thing I’m talking about and proving that it is somewhat based in reality. It would help if I knew more about American comedy. You can’t really compare British and American comedy unless you know quite a bit about both, and I don’t know nearly enough about American to really understand this.
That’s why I asked my brother about it the other night, because he’s been doing comedy in Canada for a long time and most of the comedy he watches/likes is American. I asked him if he knows what I mean when I talk about this dichotomy, and why it may or may not exist. And he didn’t really know what I’m talking about, which means 1) the difference is so significant that someone who mainly follows North American comedy doesn’t even know about the dead dad Edinburgh show so can’t compare anything to it, and/or 2) I didn’t explain it very well. Because we had a whole conversation where at some point I realized we were talking past each other. He was using the word “alt” a lot, and it meant one thing to him and a different thing to me, so neither of us really knew what the other was talking about.
That in itself is interesting to me, because it shows that comedy is too big to really make these generalizations. You can’t talk about “alt comedy” as a coherent thing, because it means wildly different things in wildly different places. You can’t talk about “British comedy” or “American comedy” because Britain and America both have a lot of people in them who all do wildly different things.
At some point in my conversation with my brother, I said that when I say storytelling comedy I mean “like the thing Mike Birbiglia does”, and he has seen some Mike Birbiglia but says he doesn’t think what he does is particularly different from what most American comedians do, and I couldn’t refute that because I haven’t actually heard Mike Birbiglia yet. All I could say on that was… well one time I heard Nish Kumar say Birbiglia is like a British comedian, so that’s probably true, right?
So I really don’t know what I’m talking about well enough to understand this, or even explain it. Then again, my brother told me that he thinks British comedians write regular jokes in a way that American comedians don’t, and I said no, I think of the opposite as being true, and when I asked him for examples of why he thinks British comedians are like that, he said Jimmy Carr and Ricky Gervais. So he may not know enough about British comedy to know what he’s talking about. Is it possible that no one knows what they’re talking about? That’s kind of interesting to me too, I assume anyone who actually does comedy must know everything about it. I mean, I try really hard to know about comedy, but I don’t know nearly enough about it to properly do it. So the people who do do it know way more than I do and understand everything. But my brother’s been doing it 13 years, had traveled to perform in the States and nearby cities somewhat often, never made enough money from it to quit his day job but has made quite a lot of money from it over the years, and he may also not know what he’s talking about.
At some point we got talking about recorded comedy, and he said when he listens to audio-only comedy, and then watches a video of those people, he’s often surprised because he was picturing someone young and hot but it turns out to be a balding man in his fifties. I said that often, I can hear hours and hours of audio-only comedy by someone, and have an image of them in my head, and then see a picture of them, and I’m always surprised by how different the picture looks. Because I’m always picturing a person in their forties or fifties, maybe a bit overweight, slightly balding if it’s a cis man, and then I’m often surprised to learn they’re actually around my age or younger (many exceptions there too, Kitson is currently mid-40s and balding but I tend to picture him the way he looked in 2003, though I’m sort of updating my mental image of him now). Which I’m pretty sure says something about the difference between the comedy I watch and the comedy my brother watches, that we have such different images in our head of the “default comedian”, what we picture when we don’t know how someone really looks.
This may or may not be related to the fact that my brother recently started putting clips of his own comedy on Tik-Tok, and has things to say about how the engagement is going that make me despair at the soullessness of humanity. So what does he know? At some point I worked out that when he talks about writing jokes in a classic way, he doesn’t just mean one-liners, he means anyone who actually writes their material instead of just doing crowd work and “comedian destroys heckler” videos for social media. Apparently doing anything besides that is old school now, and he thinks British comedians do more old school stuff than American comedians, and again, I despair at the soullessness of humanity. But to be fair to America, I’m sure there are plenty of soulless British comedians on Tik-Tok too.
That’s part of it though, isn’t it? That my brother thinks of Tik-Tok-type comedy as American and British comedy as stuff that doesn’t do that. You can’t cut out a clip of a good dead dad show and put those 90 seconds on social media. I mean, you could, and I guess some people do, but that’ll ruin it. The British Edinburgh hours need their context, the good ones aren’t nearly as good without it. But maybe American comedy can be clipped more easily, since it’s not written to all flow together. But also, British comedians cut bits of their show out all the time to shoehorn into their twenty seconds of screentime on a panel show. Stewart Lee had a whole thing about that like 15 years ago, how no comedian can be that funny if their set can be cut up for a panel show. But, you know, we can’t all be Stewart Lee (though it’s my understanding that many people have tried). I’m pretty sure this is the sort of thing Stewart Lee knows about, and has strong opinions about. That was my mistake, asking the wrong comedian. I asked my brother, I should have been asking Stewart Lee.
So I still don't have an answer to who invented the dead dad show. I mean, I think I might know that one, Russell Kane may have invented the shows about dead dads specifically. But I don't know how the storytelling comedy with sad bits and themes started, or why it took off in Britain/Australia and not in North America, or if it's even true to say that happened. I feel like Kitson invented it, because it feels a bit like Kitson invented everything, but I know he didn't. I feel like Stewart Lee knows who invented it - I don't feel like he invented it, because he's constantly talking about the alt-comedy godfathers (gendered term there, but they were mostly fathers and not mothers at that time, that is an issue) from the 70s and 80s on whose shoulders he stands. And I don't really know anything about those people, so that doesn't help.
There's a guy named Oliver Double and I think he knows. I just got paid again, my bank account is looking a bit more stable than it did a little while ago, I think I'm going to buy his books. I'm also going to listen to Mike Birbiglia, I'll let you all know if he knows anything. Maybe most people don't know anything. Maybe everything has a smaller cause than I assume and we'd all be living in a radically different comedy world if Russell Kane's dad were still alive. Maybe it's fine to think the British comedy style is to write classic jokes because Jimmy Carr tours arenas and therefore gets to be their representative. Maybe the storytelling/pure joke telling comedy dichotomy doesn't even matter anymore, it's all about the dichotomy between improvised stuff on Tik-Tok and anyone who actually writes material now. Maybe improv just means crowd work now? But I hope not.
...This was going to be a post about how Hari Kondabolu thinks British comedians should scrap the concept of "recycling material" being bad, and just tell their best jokes even if they don't all fit a theme. Then I had a conversation with my brother the confused me and now I don't know. Does anyone else know anything that they want to share?
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a-mag-a-day · 1 year
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MAG 68 - folding laundry
"Thanks for letting me do this. I mean, I know you let anyone record a statement. That’s why you’re the Magnus Institute!" - Shots fired, haha xD
"Never had the academic chops to get access to your library or anything, but when all those statements were leaked back in ‘99" - <.< I wonder if it was a coincident that the Magnus Institute in Manchester burned down in 1999 in the Magnus Protocol or if there is any connection to this incident.
"So I’m kind of an artist. I like to use the detritus of mankind’s time on this planet to craft its own reflection back at itself, you know? So I take what others consider garbage and use it to send a message to the puppetmasters and fat cats who hold our lives in the palm of their hand and play with our society like a chess game. A message of art. You know what I’m talking about." - Actually I don't… and I graduated art school. So, does he take trash, make it into art and then sells it to rich people? If they don't consider you a super duper artsy-genius with a famous name, they probably won't care.
"And when you’re making art, you don’t need to be picky. If something’s not perfect, you can make it perfect. You use the beauty inside of you to reach in and pull the beauty out of the object. Sometimes by breaking it more; sometimes by repairing it just enough. And, once, by setting it on fire." - Oh god, that statement-giver sounds like my art teachers…
"I think his name’s Gus. Or Al. He looks like a Gus or an Al." - -__-
I just wanna say Jonny is playing this self-centered, overly confident art guy on speed extremely well. My brain is constantly trying to shut down.
"Don’t know who owned it before, might have even have been a library copy but the sticker was mostly torn off." - lol
Is there static during the passage from the book?
"I asked the corporal for his name, and was told that that was Private Amherst. Fitting enough, I remarked, that he should be named for a dealer in smallpox" (/later in the post-statement segment "Another point is a link that Treeves brings up which I had not considered, that of Jeffrey Amherst, an 18th century baronet who is most remembered for deliberately providing blankets infected with smallpox to Native American tribes during the so-called French and Indian Wars, leading to a devastating epidemic.") - So here's the thing. I didn't know there was an actual Amherst (Jeffery instead of John, but still) with a history in using diseases as weapon. In Austria we learn about prehistoric times, antiquity (a lot about Romans), medieval times, Renaissance, (everything about Central Europe and Mediterranean region) industrial revolution and then we learn 3 years about the first and second world war. I have almost no knowledge about the History of Britain. Even less the US, especially not in detail. I know that there was a discourse about using the name of a rl historical figure who actually did a lot of harm.
I love how these are stories withing a story within a story XD
"Be careful carrying it, though, those old pages are kind of sharp." - Oh no…
"Insects and disease. No clear connection, other than the fact that they somehow feel similar. They both make one feel distinctly unclean." - And that's all there is. It feels right. There is no clear line between the Fears. I love how this works! Soft magic systems are such an underused concept that can work so, so well!
"I’m in the tunnels. I was exploring and I got lost." - LMAO
"There were a couple of spiders, so I changed routes and found, I think it’s a gas main." - <.<
"I didn’t prepare for – AAH" - Jon getting scared is extremely funny! That little scream xD
NOT!SASHA "Hard to focus." / JON "The place plays odd tricks with your mind. When I saw Sasha down there, for a moment it was like I didn’t recognize her. She seemed… far too tall somehow." - Hmmm, so do the tunnels also affect other Fears? It's well known that it blocks the Eye, but the Not!Them also seemed to have a hard time? On the contrary the Corruption seemed to have had a field trip down there, the worms were faster and quieter in the tunnels, which was better for them to get to they prey.
Hmm the corruption getting stronger down there is an interesting question. What powers get lost in these tunnels and what powers are more potent? Is there consistency in how they are affected?
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jongbross · 5 months
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Hii bestie :)
First of all, I really love reading your works, they give me a good feeling and that I’m being loved (even if they’re just fiction). ❤️
Secondly, sorry if it’s not really EXO related.
Please allow me to express my opinion and feelings to you, and forgive me for the next thoughts. So this thing has been on my mind lately… I don’t think idols realise that fans exist outside Asia and the US… and yeah, if I had to be honest, I’d say it kinda saddens me. I’m talking about the idols in general now (don’t get me wrong), and when they say stuff like “I love my fans so much” etc, I feel excluded, because I only see mostly Asian fans getting the chance to go to their concert or a fan meeting, or just simply see them at the airport and giving them presents.
I know that feeling like this is not a behaviour of a true fan, but! aren’t we allowed to feel, let’s say, jealous sometimes? I mean, it passes soon but it can also bring me down and I even feel guilty for not being able to be that fan who supports their idols in that way. Of course, I know how much easier it is to travel to those countries near Korea, but still.. especially, when a group/soloist has been in the industry for a while now, I think they could visit further countries too to give at least a tiny bit of chance to see them live.
If you read it, thank you for your time, you’re the best, girl <33 I love you and keep doing what you do 🥹😘
Also, I wouldn’t mind if you shared your own thoughts tho ;)
i went to the theaters the other day to watch nct's concert, the "nct nation", you know? as i was going back home, i was talking to my sister's friend about the shows we went to, how much fun it was, and how much we wanted to see our favorite groups live (mine being exo, and hers being enhypen).
i told her that i already made my peace with the fact that maybe i'm gonna have to travel to asia to see exo live as a whole group, and that's okay. kpop is gaining more and more attention through the years, and that's amazing of course, i'm happy for that! but still, there are some things that will take more time to change.
i do believe exo cherish every fan and that they wanna go and meet as many of us as they can, but there's almost a gatekeeping with groups in korea, to the extend that some of them (not only exo members but other idols as well) think they're only famous and loved in korea. when nct 127 came to brazil, they were SHOCKED to see that we knew every song, that we screamed for every member and not only for our bias, etc. they did 3 concerts in a row, with very little seats left at the venue. they realized they're big here, you know?
i think exo would be just like that. they already know that places like japan, china, indonesia (and many more) love them, but they didn't have the chance to see that around the world and i partly blame it on sm. but things are changing for them now, baekhyun and kyungsoo have their own companies, so maybe that means we'll have more chances to see them live, who knows? it might take a while (and in exo case i think it will take a while, considering sekai's enlistment, the whole lawsuit that was going on and that definitely left a bitter taste for sm, etc), but eventually the way they see the whole world will change and opportunities will come their way.
so it's okay to feel that way, there is no such thing as "true fan behaviour" in my opinion. just please, know that you are loved and that exo do appreciate you! <3
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jesse-of-jugo · 10 months
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The Knight and the Rebel Chapter 2
                “Have y’all seen the new guy?”
                “Sword dude, yeah?”
                “I reckon he’s got an actual name but yeah, ‘sword dude.’”
                “Well, you don’t know his name, either. What have you been calling him, smartass?”
                “I’ve been calling him ‘the new guy’, dumbass.”
                “I actually hate playing with you two. Shut your traps and deal already.”
                The saloon wasn’t much of anything but dusty and old, a microcosm of the town of Dogwood itself. Out in the badlands at the foot of the mountains, what was left of the town cowered in the shadows of abandoned steel foundries and overgrown knotweed. It was simply another hamlet adopted by industry long ago, and discarded just as quickly. However, Dogwood had one thing that made it different to other such towns: John Folson, a man of many talents and strong convictions, who was rapidly becoming less and less satisfied with his choice of gambling buddies.
                Jay Crock and Hannah Dixie, two of the three folks stirring up the dust in the saloon that day, were both, officially, part of Dogwood’s peacekeeping force. Unofficially, they did pretty much whatever they liked. Not a lot happened in Dogwood, so mostly they were happy to hang around and collect their stipend every two weeks from the Sheriff.
                Sometimes the planets would align and something would actually happen in Dogwood. A landslide would cut off a road nobody uses, or a couple cans of beans would go missing from the general store. When this happened, Jay and Hannah were known to overstep what few boundaries they had. Quick to assign blame and easily overcome with paranoia, they almost always left the situation off worse than they had found it, their egos freshly stroked, holding their heads high like pigeons. They were the kind of people to ask you what was wrong, then move heaven and earth to make it worse. The sheriff may have cared if he wasn’t nearly always busy candying up his nose, so the two were guaranteed a payday all the same.
                They weren’t stupid, only a little evil.
                Maybe now it will make more sense why something as simple as a stranger in town could rile the two up as easily as it did.
                Hannah dealt the cards. Dead Man’s Bluff was the game, which meant five cards to a hand, and three face-down in the middle of the table. “Yeah yeah, I don’t like the looks of him.” She examined her cards, frowning slightly. “You seen what he’s wearing? What kind of man wears a skirt? I just can’t respect it.”                 “That’s what they all wear in the Eastern Kingdoms,” said Jay, eager to show off what little he knew of the wider world. “They all dress like fuck’n queers out there. That’s why all them places are going to shit.” He coughed, throwing phlegm across the table and stirring up some homegrown Dogwood dust. “I say let them do what they please out there, but I don’t see why they got to come and bring their ways over here. This is our town.”
                Folson settled back in his chair, hiding his hand against his chest, not meeting the eyes of the other two. “I’m from the Eastern Kingdoms too, Jay,” he said. “You don’t seem to mind me much.”
                “Yeah, but you’re no queer.” Jay spat out the last word as if it were a curse. “And you don’t-“
                Folson butted in, voice calm and unbothered. “And I don’t make waves when I find you two strung out on paint fumes and face-down in a cattle lagoon?” He casually flicked through his cards. “A foreigner saved your lives that day. Try and remember that.”
                Jay was silent, though not even close to ashamed. Hannah chuckled humorlessly. “Not a queer one, though,” she said.
                Folson sighed and set lay his cards on the table. “I think I’m done for-“
                The little bell missing its clapper above the doorframe clattered dully as the door swung open, throwing up dust that sparked in the invading sun, and revealing, as if summoned, the silhouette of the stranger. In stark contrast to the three card players’ jeans, shirts, and jackets, he wore a pepper-red tunic which ended right above his knees, flowing over a sturdy-looking pair of trousers and high leather riding boots. Above it all, a face that could be described as nothing other than “knightly” presided, framed by wavey light brown hair that barely touched his shoulders, and only slightly marred by traveler’s stubble. In one hand he carried a long and straight sword, simple and flawless in its construction, and clad in a scabbard of leather and wood. Normally that sword might have hung from his belt, but for now the fastening straps were wrapped delicately about the sheath.
                In this old bar nestled between nowhere and nothing, he seemed to have stepped out of another world entirely.
                Jay and Hannah side-eyed the stranger, but he didn’t return even that much recognition. Instead, he politely leaned his sword beside the door, right next to Folson’s spear, and approached the bar. One there, he waited a moment to see whether someone may walk out, then craned his neck to peer into the serving window behind the counter.
                Hannah broke the silence. “If you’re looking for Barnes, he went home for the day. Weren’t feeling right, he said.”
                The stranger nodded. “I see.” He gestured to the door, still open from his entry. “I’ve been watching the livestock out at the East End farm this morning. They sent me over here to tell Barnes that his beef shipment will be late this month. Would any of you kindly pass it on?”
                “I may,” spat Jay. “May not. Depends on how I feel.”
                The stranger nodded amicably, sensing that the conversational tone had little chance of improving. “Thank you. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll take my leave.” He started back towards the door with the same relaxed swagger he entered with.
                Jay laughed an ugly, sharp laugh. “You hear that, fellas? He’s gonna ‘take his leave.’ Jesus, he even talks like a queer.” He hesitated for a moment in his chair, working himself up into an impotent rage, then stood.
                Folson put his head in a hand and sighed. “Jesus fucking Christ, Jay. Sit down.”
                Jay didn’t respond, instead keeping his eyes locked with the stranger’s, who stood stone still in the middle of the taproom. “And what if we don’t excuse you? See, we like the way this town is. We don’t need your kind coming in here and thinking you can just do whatever you want, walking around town like you own the fucking place.”
                “Jay,” pleaded Folson, “just sit down so we can finish the hand.”
                The stranger allowed himself a slight sneer. “I’ll only be here a few days more to resupply, then I’ll be on my way, I swear to you.”
                “Not good enough,” spat jay. “You’ve already gone and made yourself a nuisance to the good taste of this town, and now you’ve interrupted our game. Big mistake leaving your sword at the door, boy. Now you’re not gonna leave this place until you’re black and blu-“
                His threat ended in an undignified gasp as a chair shattered across his back.
                Jay toppled onto the floor, his forehead clipping the edge of a table as he fell. His body clattered on the floorboards and he curled up, moaning and holding a hand to the blood welling up above his right eye, all bravado extinguished. Folson stood among the debris of the chair, holding in each hand a wooden leg with a jagged, splintered end.
                A moment passed in stunned silence, then Hannah was on her feet. Pulling a long knife free from her belt, she flung the table aside and lunged at Folson through the hurricane of flying cards and coins. Folson spun out of the thrust’s path a hair too late. The long blade opened up a slit in his jacket and the shirt below it, and drew blood across his ribs on the right side. The cut was painful, but shallow. More importantly, Folson was still on his feet.
                Completing his spin, he brought the chair legs, now improvised clubs, down on Hannah’s wrist and across her chin. She cursed as her knife clattered to the floor. Folson hoped the fight would end there, but no such luck. Without missing a beat, Hannah brought her hands up into a brawler’s guard and threw two straight, hard punches. The first connected with the bones around Folson’s left eye, and stars danced in his vision. The second he saw coming, and twisted so that it only glanced off his shoulder. Then, he closed the distance.
                Still clutching the makeshift clubs, he jammed one arm under Hannah’s armpit, and hooked the other around her overextended leg. Sinching her body tight against his and pulling up her knee to connect with his hip, she could do nothing but hammer uselessly against his shoulder blade as he ran forward with her and threw her back against the large window between them and the street.
                The glass shattered, and the sound had the effect of a boxing bell. The fight was over. Folson released his grip, and Hannah toppled out the empty frame, laying prone among the glittering glass, and gasping as she tried to catch her breath. Only then did the last of the playing cards soundlessly settle to the ground.
                Folson, breathing hard, tossed the chair legs onto the ground. At the sound of their latter against the floorboards, Jay hurriedly found his feet and scrambled out the door, sobbing and still clutching his forehead. At last, peace had returned to the saloon.
                “You shouldn’t have done that,” said the stranger. “I had it under control. I was in no danger.”
                Folson ambled over to the bar, where he sat and inspected the cut across his ribs. “I know.” He winced as he prodded the wound. “People who carry swords like yours usually have some idea of what to do in a fight, with or without it. I have no doubt you would have hurt them much more than I did, maybe even killed them. What I did to those idiots was a kindness.”
                The stranger glanced around the saloon, at the mosaic of splintered debris and playing cards and blood. “What a strange land this is where this is what it means to be kind.”
                Folson chuckled. “I also may or may not have wanted an excuse to do that for a while. They have a way of pushing my buttons, those two. They’re not evil, I don’t think, just a little stupid.” Folson wasn’t always right.
                The stranger nodded slightly. “I know the type. Think they’ll stand for it?”
                “Probably not. Tomorrow they’ll pretend it never happened to save face, but sooner or later it’ll boil over, and there’s not much I can do against a knife in the ribs while I sleep or a bottle across the head in the dark of night. It’s probably best I move on to some other backwater.”
                The stranger nodded, his eyes downcast. “I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to leave your home because of me.”
                “It’s far from my home. I’ve only been here a few months, and in truth I was starting to wear out my welcome. A couple errands, and I’ll be gone by sundown.” Lazily, obviously exhausted from the fight, he walked to the door and freed the spear hanging there from the makeshift rack of furniture clutter, inspecting the gleaming point for rust. Satisfied, he slipped an oiled sheath over the point. He tucked the haft under his armpit like a cane, and peered at the stranger’s sword. “A masterwork, not a weapon for an unimportant person.” He looked back towards the stranger. “We’re not of the same stock, are we?”
                “I suppose not, no,” replied the stranger. “My Name is Sevante. It seems right you should know.”
                “Folson,” said the vagabond, donning a black, broad-brimmed hat from the hat rack.
                “I don’t expect we will be seeing each other again,” said Sevante. “May you find what you seek in your journeys.”
                Folson tipped the rim of his hat. “And the same to you, mate. Toodles” With that he stepped out of the saloon, and the rhythmic sound of his spear shaft clacking against the ground faded away.
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greengoblinn · 2 years
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the oversaturation of the comic/superhero movie industry is driving me insane
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sluttyten · 3 years
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the cinderella search
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summary: you’re a staff member at SM, and during the annual Halloween party, you go dressed as Cinderella. Enter Johnny as Prince Charming. You talk, you flirt, he falls in love, but you forget to tell him your name before the night ends, and thus begins his Cinderella Search.
length: 10,615
tags: near-strangers to lovers, bed sharing, fingering, dry humping, fluff, light on the smut compared to some of my other works tbh
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Growing up, Cinderella had always been your favorite fairy tale. You just really loved the glamor and romance of the story, the idea of dressing up all beautifully and mysteriously, going to a ball to be noticed by the Prince. 
And once you grew up, you still had that fantasy tucked away in the back of your mind, made more real when you entered the idol industry by joining SM Entertainment as a staff member. You were just a minor staff member, not important enough to be a manager (though that was the dream), but you were around idols so often that the fantasy was there, prodding you in the back of your mind.
There were days when you dreamed of being swept up in a Cinderella-style romance with one of the idols in the company. 
“I can’t blame you one bit,” your close friend Jiwon tells you one day. She’s a makeup artist for the company; she’s seen their bare faces, seen them up close and personal, and having worked there for longer than you, she knows various artists under the company better than you do. “I won’t disagree with you at all that a secret romance with one of them would be amazing. Just like a drama. I want Kyungsoo to be my prince charming.” She sighs dreamily. “I can’t wait for the Halloween party.”
That’s exactly what you’ve been talking about almost non-stop since you first heard that it was happening this year. With the party not having happened for a few years now due to one thing or another, this year it’s come back with a bang, and when the memo was put out that every staff member was invited to come in costume as well, just as a celebration for how hard everyone’s worked, it’s all that pretty much everyone’s been talking about. You’re excited that you get to go, that you get to dress up as well, and what caused Jiwon to start gushing about D.O. is you mentioning that you wanted to go dressed as Cinderella.
“Promise we can get ready together?” She asks you. “I really, really want to do your hair and makeup, I can already picture it.” Jiwon holds her fingers up, framing your face between them. 
It helped that you already had the dress to wear for your costume. You’d spotted it a few years ago in a thrift shop, and because of your pure love for Cinderella, as soon as you saw the dress, you knew that you had to have it. Sure, it had been collecting dust in your closet for a couple years, but now you had found the perfect use for it at last.
The day of the Halloween party, Jiwon comes over just as she’d planned, taking as much of the day as she possibly can to make you up and style your hair to make you look like the Cinderella of her imagination. She’s just going simply, wearing all black with some cat ears, some whiskers drawn on her face, but most of her attention to detail is poured into her work on you. 
By the time she finishes the last touch, you’re ready to leave. Already you’re going to be cutting it close to showing up late, so as she drops her brushes back in the bag she brought, you grab your phone, and make for the door.
“Oh no, you’re not finished yet.” She snakes her hand around your arm, bringing you to a halt. Jiwon tuts at you. “Cinderella can’t go to the ball without her mask.” 
Like a true fairy godmother, Jiwon pulls a beautiful mask out of the makeup bag. “I saw this when I was shopping for my costume, and I knew it would just be perfect. You can’t be Cinderella and have everyone know who you are, that goes against the point of being Cinderella, right?”
She carefully sits the mask on your made-up face, ties the ribbons around the back of your head, trying not to disturb the work she put into your hair.
“Can we go now, fairy godmother?” You ask. “Before midnight, preferably.”
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The fairytale vibe of the night truly hits home once you arrive at the party’s venue. Everyone’s in costumes, and at first it’s overwhelming because you can’t immediately distinguish the idols from the staff from the higher-ups in the company. As you and Jiwon step inside, you can only make out a few distinct people. 
Red Velvet’s Irene is dressed like an actual goddess, complete with an array of stars in an arc around her (an interesting choice that definitely makes sure no one gets too close to her). You spot Chanyeol standing tall over the group of people he’s talking with too. And then you see him.
Prince Charming.
Johnny Suh. 
He looks breathtakingly handsome, wearing a white uniform adorned with golden tassels and medals. His hair is gelled back from his face, and he’s in the middle of laughing at the princess beside him, though her back is to you. Johnny literally looks like a prince with his face full of sunlit radiance, and in that moment your heart yearns. You wish you had a Prince Charming, but it’s clear that this one already has his princess.
And then she turns around with a flip of her long, dark wavy hair.
You burst out laughing so loud that Jiwon hits your arm to make you quiet down. 
Hendery is dressed as a princess, clinging to Johnny’s arm as Jungwoo and Ten stand there with them, both of them laughing along with the costumed couple.
There are several other princesses you soon realize. Staff members and female artists have both dressed as princesses, and the more of them you see, the more you think that you’re not the Cinderella of this ball. There’s others that shine with more glitz and glamor than your thrifted dress ever could. So you mostly stick to yourself, seated at a table in the corner, sipping at your drink to avoid talking to a drunk coworker when he stumbles into his seat at the table.
You just watch the party, suddenly no longer feeling it because the best looking man here tonight is clearly Johnny Suh (which you’ve thought that numerous times before, but especially so tonight) and it’s obvious that everyone else thinks so too. He wins a prize. He has people coming up to him all night, fawning over him, running their fingers through the tassels on his shoulders.
“Stop pouting,” Jiwon tells you as she drops down into the seat beside yours. She sits a fresh drink down in front of you. “Just drink this down and come have fun with me. We can mingle and actually get the chance to speak to some of these idols we never work with.” 
You know she has her eyes on D.O. who’s standing in a clear line of sight from where you’re both sitting, holding an audience of a few people captive with his story.
“You go.” You nod toward him. “Here’s your chance, Jiwon.”
She frowns at you. “I didn’t spend so long making you look like Cinderella just for you to sit all glum in the corner. You look fantastic, darling, and if you don’t get up and show off that lovely dress and your beautiful face, then we can’t be friends anymore.” She folds her arms in front of her and pouts. 
“If I go get some more drinks, does that count?”
“It’s an improvement at least.” She sighs. “I’m going to try to talk to him. While I’m gone, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” She eyes your coworker who’s slumped over in his chair now, starting to snore. “And make sure he doesn’t puke on himself.”
You have no intention of babysitting a guy who takes every opportunity to steal credit from you, so you definitely leave the table as soon as Jiwon walks away. 
You’re standing at the bar area, waiting for the man behind the counter to make the drink you’d requested, when someone comes up beside you, just a figure in the corner of your eye. It’s only when he speaks that you look up to see who he actually is.
“I think you dropped this,” Johnny says, and he’s holding up one of the satiny blue gloves you’d worn tonight. You’d taken them off while you ate, and you forgot you’d tucked them in the ribbon around your waist.
“Oh, thank you.” You incline your head and reach for the glove, but when your fingers brush Johnny’s, you pull away with your whole hand tingling. “I probably dropped the other one somewhere too.” You look around, searching the floor.
Johnny chuckles. “No, it’s still right there.” 
You feel a blush rising to your cheeks, and you’re grateful that you’re wearing the mask that hides most of your face. The other glove is still safely tucked at your waist, and as Johnny tells the bartender what he’d like, you pull both gloves onto your hands.
“Here’s your drink, Princess.” The man behind the counter winks as he says it, pushing the drink toward you. “And yours, Prince Charming.”
You take your drink and start to walk away, planning to head back to your comfortable corner to drink alone in peace, but then you notice Johnny just a step behind you. 
“I think you’re the only person dressed as a princess tonight that hasn’t come up to talk to me tonight.” He says, “Which is unfortunate, since I saw you the moment you walked in, and I wanted to come talk to you then, but Hendery wouldn’t let go of me. I think you deserved best costume; I’ve never seen a better Cinderella.”
His flattery works wonders on melting what nervousness you have in talking with him. Johnny’s all but a stranger to you. You don’t work closely with NCT, but on the few occasions you’ve gotten to work with them, Johnny was always such a large personality, so nice and funny and handsome. Maybe you definitely have a ridiculous crush on him. But it’s always been foolish and far-fetched.
This is the first conversation you’ve ever had with him, and you don’t quite make it back to that table in the back corner. Johnny drags you down to sit beside him at his table, and even though you’re surrounded by the other members, the way he’s looking at you as you talk makes it feel like it’s only the two of you in the whole building. 
You finish your drink, lose track of time, and by the time that the party’s really and truly ending, you’ve forgotten everything but the way that Johnny looks at you, the sound of his voice, and how much that you have in common with him. Maybe it’s ridiculous to form such a deep connection with someone at a party, especially when tomorrow you go back to being just a lowly staff member and he’s a world-famous idol. 
But Princess Hendery is the one to break up this intimate conversation. His hand lands on Johnny’s shoulder, and Johnny’s head snaps around. 
“Hyung, your ride’s about to leave.” Hendery pats Johnny’s shoulder, and then points down the length of the table to a man you recognize as an NCT manager. A tipsy Jaehyun walks by, his fingers twisting in the neck of Johnny’s uniform, and he leans in to whisper something in Johnny’s ear, his fingers slipping down to get a better grip on Johnny’s uniform, and then he’s dragging Johnny out of his seat, pulling him away out the door with their manager before you can get another word in.
You look around then, somewhat dazed at being pulled back into non-Johnny reality, and also slightly buzzed from your drinks, and you realize that the room has emptied out around you, only a handful of people remain. Including Jiwon. She’s bright red and grinning from ear to ear, leaning on a man in costume.
You refuse to let her make any drunken mistakes tonight, so you make your way over, loop your arm around her waist. “Come on, fairy godmother, it’s midnight and we need to get home before the spell wears off.”
Jiwon moans and groans, reluctantly letting you lead her out of the party at last, taking her home to pass out on your sofa.
And it’s a bit later as you fall into bed fresh from your shower with all the makeup washed away now, as you look happily at the photos you’d taken with Jiwon and some selfies you’d snapped several times throughout the night, that you tragically remember that you never gave Johnny your name.
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By tragedy or fate or something else against you in the universe, you don’t get to see Johnny again before your position in the company takes you overseas. Not long term, just for a month. But during that month you build a lot of experience toward achieving your dream of becoming a manager for a group, getting your hands almost within reach of that prized promotion. 
And as for your Cinderella moment, you try to put it out of your mind, just as you’re sure Johnny’s done. Over a month has passed since the Halloween party, and you doubt he even remembers the Cinderella he spent the night talking to. Even if he does remember, you feel that any chance has long since passed for you to find him and tell him it was you.
On your first day back within the building, you’ve barely made it inside before Jiwon finds you. 
You hear her slippers slapping against the ground as she runs toward you, and then she loops her arm through yours in a vice. “Come with me. We need to talk,” she whispers conspiratorially, dragging you into the elevator with her.
“I didn’t want to tell you this while you were away dealing with everything, but,” she says excitedly in a hushed voice so no one overhears, “As your self-designated fairy godmother, I thought I should definitely give you a little heads up. Johnny’s been looking for Cinderella.”
Your heart thuds in your chest. “What?”
“Everyone’s heard him asking around casually about who’d been Cinderella that night, but you sneaky thing!” She pinches your side. “How did you manage to go the whole night without telling anyone who you were?”
Had you? You’d definitely talked with several other staff members at the start of the night, including your supervisor. At least one of them must have recognized you, right? But looking back now, maybe you hadn’t talked in particular about anything that would have given away who you were, and you don’t remember any of them calling you by name or even acknowledging that you were in their department. 
You’re still trying to wrap your head around it when the elevator doors open, and Jiwon walks out, still arm-in-arm with you.
“Look, it’s even a company-wide kind of meme.” She points at a bulletin board nearby where normally notices about events and deadlines and everything are hung. But now there’s also a sheet of paper with the word WANTED at the top, a badly pixellated image of the Disney version of Cinderella beneath that, and below that LAST SEEN: SM HALLOWEEN PARTY. In tiny font beneath contact NCT Johnny if you have any information. 
“What the hell?” You look around to see if anyone else is looking, and then you step forward and tear it off the bulletin board. “What are people thinking? What if this shows up in the background of a video?” Idols pass through here semi-frequently with cameras on them for one reason or another. You can only imagine the chaos of fans reacting to such a notice as this Cinderella one.
Jiwon laughs as you crumple the sheet up and toss it in a nearby trashcan. “At this point, everyone’s started assuming Cinderella was just a random party-crasher or a ghost since she hasn’t come forward.” She pats your shoulder comfortingly. “One of the aespa girls almost confessed to him that it was her.”
A flare of jealous heat sparks to life in your belly. “Well, it definitely wasn’t!”
“Of course not! She was dressed like a princess too, but not anything remotely Cinderella-esque.” Someone walks into the elevator area, so Jiwon drops her voice to a whisper once more as she tries to urge you, “You should go tell him that you’re his Cinderella! It would be so cute!” 
“Are you kidding?” You hiss, glancing over at the man waiting for an elevator. “Look at me, Jiwon. He’d take one look and laugh that I couldn’t possibly be Cinderella. I don’t look anything like I did that night.” You gesture at the very casual outfit you’re wearing, your drastically less made-up face, and just everything about you. You’d truly experienced some kind of magical transformation that night courtesy of the woman beside you. “I couldn’t tell him. Plus, it’s been over a month. Is he really still looking for Cinderella? I’d have given up by this point, like you said, just thinking it was a random party-crasher or something. Plus, if this is like an actual Cinderella moment, it’s not like anything romantic can happen between him and I. It’s against policy.”
Jiwon shakes her head, disappointed. “You’re such a party pooper, darling. And, you’re right, this isn’t a fairytale, okay? I get that. It’s real life and there’s actual consequences, so I won’t blame you if you don’t tell him. But come on, the risk is well worth the reward here, I would think. This job or Johnny? The choice is obvious to me.”
Maybe once you would have agreed. Choosing the literal man of your dreams (because Johnny has been showing up in your dreams with some amount of frequency ever since Halloween) would have been an easy choice before you’d actually landed a position in SM Entertainment. Even then, it wouldn’t have been a crazy choice in your mind. But more recently things have changed.
“They’re promoting me.” You shake Jiwon loose so you can face her properly. “That’s what the whole point of me being overseas for the last month was. Training me up, seeing if I had the potential to really be a manager. And that’s my dream job, you know. I don’t think the risk is worth the reward in this case. But damn,” you sigh, catching sight of a screen showing a clip from one of NCT’s music videos, Johnny’s face filling the screen. “I wish it was possible.”
To give up your dream job just for the possibility of a romance with an idol seemed far-fetched and stupid. 
So you ignore the Cinderella search. It’s not like you ever even see Johnny, so it’s not a problem at all.
Until the day comes when you officially receive your promotion. 
“You’re being promoted,” your supervisor tells you, “NCT needs a new manager, and you’re best qualified for the job.”
Your stomach feels like it drops to the floor. “What?”
You’d been expecting that you were going to get to help manage a new group, or at least maybe aespa. You didn’t think they’d throw you to the wolves that was the confusing mess of NCT’s schedules. So it was a nightmare wrapped in a thin layer of a dream, and right at the heart of it all was Johnny Suh.
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You were so nervous on your first day as a manager (because of course, you couldn’t manage one of the other units, you had to be assigned to 127) that Johnny would recognize you on the spot, call you out on being Cinderella, and make a scene. But you were equally as nervous that he wouldn’t recognize you at all.
The latter turned out to be the truer though not entirely accurate.
When you were introduced to the members, Johnny gave you a kind smile, and then said, “Hey, I recognize you.”
Your heart stopped and then started beating at what felt like double-time. “You do?”
He nods. “Yeah, you’ve worked with us before, right?”
Ah. Your heart rate slows back to normal. “Yeah, yes, I have. Just a few times.” 
Then he repeats your name back to you as if making sure that he’s got it right, and an hour later you’re still thinking about the way that your name sounds from his lips.
That feeling doesn’t pass, not for a while. 
Slowly you grow more comfortable and relaxed in your role a manager for the group. You get used to the stunning presence of the handsome men. You get used to the sound of Johnny’s voice and his laugh. You get used to driving the members around, shuttling them to and from schedules, getting them what they need, managing them and managing your feelings.
And best of all, you never hear Johnny mention Halloween or Cinderella, which makes it much easier to put it all from your mind. Well, somewhat easier. Jiwon refuses to let you forget; she calls herself your fairy godmother all the time, calls you princess, teases you when you mention stories that involve Johnny, which is most of them because within several weeks of you becoming a manager for the unit, you and Johnny have actually grown quite close.
“Oh, come on!” Jiwon exclaims one evening as she stretches out on your bed. “I’m tired of all of these cute, funny stories about Johnny! I want gushy romantic, hot stories.” She rolls over onto her stomach and looks at you. “God, let me tell you, one time when I was doing their makeup the stylist had to make an alteration on his pants, and that man whipped off his pants with no shame and stood there in his underwear for me to do his makeup. Babe, I know you’re already mentally going through hoops to avoid thinking about him, but trust me that you would reconsider if you had seen his--”
You slap your hand over her mouth. “Don’t.”
“No need to sound so pained about it.” She pushes your hand away. “I don’t know why you’re fighting this so hard. Yeah, you’re a manager, but you and him are fully grown adults. This is a stupid policy because from the stories you’ve told me, if you and Johnny were just alone for like an hour together, you would probably end up together.”
You roll your eyes. There have been times you’ve been alone with Johnny, driving him to or from a schedule. It wasn’t like there was undeniable sexual tension in that van or anything like that. And even if Jiwon means totally alone in a non-mobile setting, you doubt anything like that would happen, but you’ve never yet had the chance to find out.
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When the first winter storm hits, you’re driving Taeyong back to the dorm from a solo schedule he’d had that had run long. It’s very late. Taeyong dozes in the passenger seat, you’re yawning every other minute, and as you enter the city limits you realize that it’s starting to snow large, fluffy flakes that are coating everything they touch.
The city’s been extremely cold lately, so you’re not surprised that the snow isn’t melting, just piling up, making it hard to see at times. 
By the time you reach the dorm, the roads are slushy and slick. Snow blows across the streets in waves.
Taeyong’s schedule had been a three-day event, so he has a few items to unload, and due to the sharp cold breeze and how deep asleep he’d been just moment before, you help Taeyong unload and carry his belongings up to the dorm. Your shoes squeak on the floor, and by the time you reach the door of the dorm, you’re both still shivering.
The door opens with a chime, and as you come inside, you see Johnny’s sitting at the kitchen table playing on his phone and eating cereal. Taeyong mumbles something, toes off his shoes, drops his bags, and just stumbles off to bed, too sleepy to even do anything else.
Johnny’s watching you as you let out a big yawn and sit what you’d been carrying down beside the rest. 
You run your fingers over your hair, brushing away the last snowflakes that cling somewhat intact to your hair. “It’s snowing pretty good out there. I haven’t seen snow like this in years.”
Johnny glances over at the large window of their living room. The puffs of snow float by, lit up by all the city lights, and he stands up, walking over to press his face to the glass, looking down at the street below and the rooftops around their building. Everything’s already covered in a pretty decent amount of snow. 
“It’s beautiful out there.” Johnny is pressed to the glass, looking out at everything. 
Before you can register what’s happening (it is very late and you’re half-asleep on your feet, so excuse you if you’re a little slow at the moment), Johnny’s walking back past you, grabbing his coat from the back of a chair with one hand, and taking your hand with the other. He guides you along by the hand down through the building, out into the falling snow. 
“What are we doing?” You ask, folding your arms around yourself as Johnny releases your hand once you’re outside. Shock at the situation kept you silent until then. “You shouldn’t be out here. You’ll catch a cold.”
Johnny laughs. “I’ll be fine. Come take my picture.” He walks out into the snow-covered street, tilting his head back to the sky, arms held out. The streetlight just down the road casts Johnny and the snow in a silver light, and he’s so beautiful in that moment that you’d be crazy not to take a photo, so you pull out your phone and start taking pictures of him. 
This photoshoot goes on for several minutes before you pause to check a photo you just took, and for your efforts of trying to be a good photographer, you get a snowball right to the shoulder. Johnny’s laugh is loud in the muted silence of the falling snow, and he only laughs louder when you shove your phone into your jacket pocket and duck down to form a snowball of your own.
The snow fight lasts until you’re both pink-cheeked, sniffling in the cold air, and neither of you can feel your fingertips anymore.
“I’m t-too cold to keep this g-going.” Johnny laughs and shivers, tucking his hands into his armpits as he walks toward you. 
“I - I should get going anyway.” Your teeth chatter together. “I still need to get home, and it’s late.”
“Come up for c-coffee,” Johnny suggests, his eyes lingering on you and the snow caught in your hair, wreathing your face. “You’re clearly tired and cold. You need some coffee.”
Damn your heart and Johnny’s good intentions. You follow him back up to the dorm, and while you shuck off your coat and wet shoes and damp socks, Johnny starts making you both some coffee. And minutes later, you’re still shivering as you clasp a warm mug between both of your hands, sitting next to Johnny while he swipes through your camera roll to check out the photos of him you’d just taken.
You know that you should leave. It’s not appropriate for you to just be hanging out at the dorm. You should put your coat and shoes back on, take the coffee to go, and head home so you can get some sleep before you have to work tomorrow. Just as you’re about to say something along those lines, your phone buzzes against the table and Johnny makes a soft, oh.
“What?” You lean closer, sitting the mug down on the table.
“It’s a weather alert.” Johnny looks up at you, and for a moment neither of you speak or move or breathe. You’re so close together right now. You can see all of the little water droplets stubbornly clinging to his eyelashes from the snow. You can smell the coffee on his breath and something a little sweet too. But then Johnny snaps his mouth closed and leans back a little, just putting some distance between you and him. 
He clears his throat, then says, “It says the roads are really bad, that it’s just going to get worse. You should probably just stay here tonight, and I feel like you’re going to argue with that, but honestly, it’s for your own safety. Roads are dangerous, plus you’re already cold and tired. That’s a bad combination. You’re just going to have to be back here in a few hours to pick us up anyway since hyung is gone.”
You’d forgotten about that. The manager that normally stays at the dorm with them is gone for the week. That’s why you had to be the one to take Taeyong to his solo schedule, and why you were going to have to be up earlier than normal for work tomorrow. Maybe Johnny has a good point.
Johnny looks away from you, back down at your phone, and he swipes away the notification, then makes a little frown. 
You look down as well, and there you see that your phone has gone back to the screen showing all of your photos, and there, just barely visible at the top of the screen, is a photo you’d taken of yourself in the Cinderella costume on the night of the Halloween party.
Johnny inhales and the silence as you wait for his exhale seems to last an eternity.
“You were--”
You push back from the table, already reaching to pull your shoes back onto your feet, forgetting entirely about your wet socks. “I’d really better leave.”
You’re halfway to the door, hopping on one foot, struggling to get your second foot into it’s boot, when Johnny loops his hand at your elbow, helping to steady you as you’d nearly just tipped over onto your face. 
“Please don’t leave.” He pleads.
You look up at him. Your foot thumps heavily down onto the ground. “Johnny.... please. I shouldn’t stay here, I could get in trouble with the company.”
His eyes are softer than you’ve ever seen them before. “Please stay. It’s dangerous out there, I’ve said that already. If anyone has a problem with you staying here overnight for your own safety, then I’ll vouch for you. I’ll make the others vouch too.” His hand slides from your elbow down to your wrist, holding loosely now that you don’t seem to be in such a rush to leave. A slow, crooked smile appears on his lips. “And anyway, Cinderella, you’re supposed to leave a shoe behind, not your wet socks.”
You roll your eyes, but you smile as well. “I didn’t want to tell you.”
“That you’re the Cinderella I’ve been looking for for months now?” Johnny’s hand slips even lower on your wrist until his fingers are just clasping your hand. “Why didn’t you want to tell me? I had so much fun talking with you that night, and after we left I realized I hadn’t even found out who you were.”
You shiver now that your feet are back inside your wet shoes. 
Johnny clicks his tongue disapprovingly. “Take your shoes off. You’re staying. Go on. Sit right there.” He points at the chair beside the table. “I’ll be right back. Don’t you dare leave.”
His voice is so commanding, you wouldn’t dare leave now. He walks out of the kitchen, and when he returns a moment later, he’s carrying a change of clothes for you from his own closet. 
“I know it’s your job to worry about us,” he says, holding out the clothes to you. “But please let me take care of you too. Don’t catch a cold. You can go shower in the bathroom off my room, put these on. You’re staying here tonight.”
You nod, accepting the sweater and slick basketball shorts. 
When you emerge from the shower several minutes later, feeling much more thoroughly warmed, the lights in the dorm have all been turned off, but Johnny’s sitting on the sofa now with his phone lighting up his face. It’s very, very late. He looks as if he could nod off right there, but as you walk closer to him, he blinks up at you. A smile breaks across his otherwise sleepy expression.
“What?” You ask, sinking down onto the sofa with him. There’s a blanket draped over the back, and Johnny immediately pulls it down over your shoulders. You clasp the edges of it together in front of you. “Why are you smiling like that? Are you feeling feverish or something?” You lift a hand and immediately check his forehead with the back of your hand, but he doesn’t feel warm.
Johnny, still smiling, reaches up to lightly bat away your hand as he sighs and rests his head against the cushiony back of the sofa, staring at you. “No, like.... It’s just, I can’t believe you’re actually wearing my clothes.”
“You gave them to me.” You reply, amused at the dopey look on his face. 
“I know.” Johnny whispers. “You just look really good in them.”
Your heart flutters in the way that you know you shouldn’t let it. This is Johnny. You’re his manager. This is inappropriate to be feeling this way about him. It’s definitely inappropriate to be sitting on a sofa in the dark with him, wearing his clothes, having just showered in his shower using his shampoo and body wash. But it feels good.
You lean your head against the sofa’s back too, draw your knees up toward your chest, and you look right back at Johnny in the same way he’s looking at you. You whisper, “You should go to bed. We all have to be up in a few hours.”
He bites his bottom lip and then stretches out a risky hand to touch yours. When you don’t pull away or tell him not to, Johnny keeps going, turning your hand over, pulling it into his lap. He touches your palm, caresses your fingers, treating you like you’re fragile and delicate like a little princess.
“Johnny,” you whisper a few moments later when he’s still just holding your hand, making no effort to go to bed. “Go.”
“There’s so much snow out there.” He says after another few seconds. “There’s no way that we’ll still have our schedules tomorrow. By the time morning really comes, we’re going to be buried in. I was looking at the weather while you were showering, and it’s not showing any sign of stopping before at least tomorrow night.”
“Banking on your schedule being cancelled doesn’t mean you don’t have to go to bed.” Your hand shakes slightly as you lift it, trembling with the risky nature of what you do next. Johnny’s hair is soft and his face is pleasantly warm as you push a few loose strands away from his face. 
Johnny exhales at the feel of your fingertips just barely brushing his skin. “Come to bed with me. Haechan’s not here. He’s upstairs tonight.”
You noticed that as you crept into Johnny’s room to use that bathroom. Both of the beds were empty. 
It’s tempting to give in, to follow him into that bedroom and let the door close behind you as you get into bed with him. You’re sure that sharing a bed with Johnny would be very warm and comforting in this snowy cold night. But you can’t. 
“Johnny.” Your voice trembles ever so slightly. “I can’t. I’m your manager, and it just.... I could get in trouble.”
“You’re still shivering from the cold,” he argues, “Basically hypothermic. I’m just trying to keep you healthy, trying to save you from freezing. No one would know but us. If the others ask questions, I’ll make excuses.” He smiles, and that almost does it for you.
You shake your head, close your eyes, turn your head away from him so you’re not faced with the temptation. “No. I’m serious. You should go to bed. I’ll stay right here. Just here.” You pat the sofa. “I’ll be comfy and this blanket’s warm.”
“Fine.” Johnny sighs, and he stands up, still holding your hand. “But don’t think that you can sneak out, Cinderella. Okay?”
You squeeze his hand lightly. “I’m not going anywhere, Johnny.”
He leans in so quickly that there’s no time for you to even protest before he’s pressing a kiss to your cheek. And then he’s gone, vanishing into his bedroom as you sit frozen on the sofa, looking after him.
It takes a long time to fall asleep after that. Just you lying there in the dark with the blanket tugged up to your chin, listening to all of the unfamiliar sounds of the dorm, watching the snow drift by outside the window, shivering in the chill air.
After nearly an hour of silence and cold and overthinking, you sit up, gather the blanket around your shoulders, and you tiptoe across the living room to the door of Johnny’s bedroom. 
When you reach the door, you stand there in hesitation, your knuckles hovering just inches from the door. You’re being silly. Ridiculous. You’re putting the future of your career in jeopardy by just standing here before his doorway and contemplating going inside. You shift your weight uncertainly, drop your hand to your side, consider turning back and walking to the sofa, but before you can move, the door swings open and you’re faced with Johnny’s chest.
You lift your gaze slowly to his face.
“I could almost hear you thinking through the door,” he says with a smile, and then he steps aside, “Why don’t you come in?”
“It’s just cold out there,” you mumble as you step inside, pulling your blanket tighter around your shoulders. “I was going to ask if you had another blanket.”
Johnny hums in a way that tells you that he doesn’t buy your lie one bit. He closes the door behind him, his back braced against it as he faces you. “I can’t believe that all this time you’ve been my Cinderella.” He shakes his head, gaze wandering over the shadowy shape of you.
His room is dark but your eyes are adjusted just enough that you can see him fairly well in the faint light coming in through the window. So you can see as he pushes away from the door, as he steps toward you. Your body tingles in anticipation, your fingertips go numb so you curl them into fists in your blanket, and Johnny stops right in front of you.
“It’s well past midnight, Cinderella,” he whispers. “The ball is ended, the magic spell is worn off, and you’re still just as beautiful and fascinating and enchanting as you were that night.” His hands come up to the blanket wrapped around your shoulders, fingers tucking underneath. Your grip on the blanket loosens even as Johnny starts to move the blanket.
It falls away, pooling at your feet.
“Johnny.”
His thumb brushes along your jawline. Your body feels on fire, your fingers burn with the desire to touch him too. So you do, curling your fingers at his hips, his skin warm under yours, and Johnny takes a shuffling step just a bit closer to you, his bare toes bumping against yours.
“Johnny,” you repeat his name, lifting your chin to look him in the eye. “Kiss me?”
He doesn’t wait for you to ask him again. Johnny leans in and catches your lips in a kiss. His palm rests against the side of your neck, his thumb still stroking at your jaw. When you try to press closer, to deepen the kiss, Johnny backs away.
“Don’t stop,” you whine, clenching your hands at his sides. 
Johnny chuckles, dipping forward to kiss your forehead. And then he kisses you again. He takes a step back, you follow, and another, and then he’s sinking down onto his bed, his hands moving to your hips to guide you to straddle his lap, not breaking the kiss as you do.
Making out with Johnny Suh is certainly not what you imagined you’d be doing tonight when you brought Taeyong home from his schedule, but here you are, sitting in his lap in his bed, his hands on your hips, and your mouth on his.
“Wait,” he mumbles, pulling back momentarily. “Let me put some music on or something.”
You don’t want to move from his lap, but you let him lean away, reaching back across his bed toward the pillows to grab his phone. He taps at the screen for a few moments, and then music—soft enough to not wake anyone but just loud enough to mask any sounds the two of you may make—begins to play over his Bluetooth speakers.
As Johnny sits back up, leaving his phone tucked beneath his pillow, you admire the sight of him. His abs. His chest. His arms.
You’ve seen Johnny shirtless before in dressing rooms, for photo shoots and video shoots. But seeing him like this, in the half light of his bedroom with the tingling reminder of his lips on yours, is a completely different experience.
Like a magnet, he finds you again. His mouth on yours, kiss unrestrained under the cover of the music, letting out tiny little moans as he kisses you. Each sound brings a smile to your lips, and after a few moments, you’re grinning into the kiss, twisting your fingers into his hair, and Johnny smiles as he fits his hands under your borrowed sweatshirt, his fingers chilly on your heated waist and belly.
His fingers shift higher and higher, and your breath hitches as he caressed your breast.
“Alright?” He murmurs, giving you a moment to answer while he kisses the corner of your mouth, skimming his lips over your jaw, down your throat.
You shiver, twisting your fingers a little more tightly in his hair, shifting just that much closer to him. You can feel every inch of him against you, your body burns and tingles, your heart racing in your chest.
“So good,” you moan softly, tugging lightly on his hair to bring his mouth back to yours.
Johnny smiles into the kiss, his thumb drifting attentively over your nipple. Slowly he eases backwards until he’s flat on his back and you lie against his chest, still just kissing him and yearning to feel his hands touching you everywhere, not just your breast. You shiver against him again, and Johnny is gentle as he rolls you under him, as he tugs the blankets up over your bodies.
“Still cold, Cinderella?” He teases, his nose bumping against your cheek.
You push a section of his hair back behind his ear, spend a few seconds lingering there, your thumb against his face. He’s so handsome, and you being here beneath him in his bed, it’s unreal. Like a dream. Like a fairytale Cinderella moment you never thought you’d have because he’s an SM Prince, and who are you? Hardly any better than a servant.
Johnny shifts to the side, looking down at you. “What are you thinking about? You’ve got that expression.” He lifts a finger and traces the furrow between your eyebrows.
“I’m just thinking how I don’t belong here.” You sigh, looking away to the window. Your hand is on his arm and you absentmindedly stroke over his sunflower tattoo, mirroring the movements of his thumb moving back and forth on your waist beneath the sweatshirt. 
Johnny’s lips touch against your throat, pulling a sigh from your lips, to which he asks, “What do you mean you don’t belong here? And don’t tell me again that it’s because you’re a manager.”
But that’s exactly why. 
“Stay here. With me.” Johnny withdraws his hand from beneath your sweatshirt. “If you feel like this is moving too fast, we can stop here. We can go to sleep. Just sleep.”
He moves back an inch or two, just as much as his narrow twin bed will allow, but you don’t want him to go far. You scoot closer again, still gripping his arm. Johnny smiles at that. You sink your head onto the pillow, look up at him. “I’ll stay.”
“Good.” Johnny brings his hand up, tracing his knuckles lightly along your cheek in a way that makes your heart pound and your toes and fingertips tingle in delight, in the need for reciprocation, to touch him and hold him too. But you bring your hands up to your chest, clench them into tight fists inside the sleeves of the sweater, will yourself to not touch him because if you do, you’re pretty sure you won’t be able to stop yourself from going further. 
“You promise you won’t run away after I close my eyes?” Johnny asks. 
“I promise.” You watch as Johnny stands up from the bed, and he hesitates then for a moment, looking down at you, his hands on his hips. You think, for a moment, that he’s about to tell you goodnight and sleep in Haechan’s bed instead. But he takes a deep breath, his thumbs tracing along the waistband of his sweatpants. 
“So, normally, I do sleep in my underwear. I get hot at night, so it’s just a lot more comfortable for me.” He explains, glancing away as he admits this. You have a feeling that he might actually normally sleep naked, but given that you’ve both agreed to draw the line at making out and some light touching tonight, being naked in bed with you might be a bit more than you wanted. 
You appreciate his unspoken question, a request for you to consent to him stripping to his underwear to sleep in bed with you. But it’s his bed, in his bedroom, in his apartment where you still feel you don’t entirely belong. You’re the intruder here. And besides--
“I like to sleep in my underwear too,” you tell him. “So it works out.” 
Beneath the blanket, you shimmy easily out of the silky basketball shorts Johnny had lent you, and as you drop them out over the side of the bed, you watch Johnny swallow, his throat bobbing even as he smiles a little. You watch too as his thumbs tuck under the waistband of his pants, and then he’s pushing them down, kicking them off, slipping back into the narrow bed with you.
You keep the sweater on, but the bare skin of your legs, from toe to hip feel so free beneath the sheets, and when Johnny’s knee knocks into yours, you feel it from the point of contact all the way through your body. You’re hyper-aware of him, more than you’ve ever been with anyone else probably.
And then you lift your leg a little, draping it over one of his so your knee rests between both of his. You prop yourself on your side a bit, a hand tucked under the pillow. Johnny faces you too.
“Goodnight, Cinderella,” he whispers. 
“Goodnight, Johnny.”
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You don’t remember falling asleep. One moment you were listening to the music softly playing still from the speakers, to the even sound of Johnny breathing. And then you’re woken by the sound of your phone ringing while the sky outside is still a dim shade of gray.
Your phone’s in the pocket of the shorts on the floor, so you fumble around for a moment before finally fishing them out of the pocket. You stab at the button to answer the call, squinting against the brightness of the screen.
“Hello?” You mumble into the phone.
Johnny shifts beside you, his hand sliding over your belly where the sweatshirt has ridden up through the night. His thumb touches the lacy edge of your panties. You close your eyes and focus on breathing, on listening to whoever’s interrupted your sweet sleep so early in the morning. 
“I’ve got some good news.” It’s your boss, the one who makes all of the big calls. “Schedules are cancelled for the day, that’s the official news. The city’s snowed in, so you can stay home today.”
You can’t believe Johnny was right about that. You’ve never had a day where you heard of their schedules being cancelled because of the weather like this, but you accept it, thank him for calling to let you know, and when you end the call, you lie there in the silent darkness of the bedroom.
At some point in the night, the music has ended. It must be very early, with the sky still so dark outside the window, but even in the half-light you can still see snowflakes drifting by. 
Johnny’s fingers twitch on your belly, his pinky finger stroking along the top edge of your panties. You turn your head to look at him.
His eyes are still closed, but you can tell that he’s awake.
“Who was that?” He asks after a few moments, his voice soft and rough at the same time, drenched with sleep. 
“You were right. The day’s schedules are cancelled.” You lay your hand over his. You’re half-tempted to move it just because it’s driving you to distraction, but at the same time you don’t want him to stop touching you like this.
“Mm, perfect.” Johnny opens one eye to look at you. “Now we can just sleep for the rest of the morning. Stay in bed.”
You want that. There’s nothing you want more right now than to stay here in bed with Johnny. “I should probably go let the other boys know. Tell them to turn off their alarms. To stay inside today where it’s warm.”
The tip of his pinky makes it just beneath the edge of your panties. Your nipples are hard, and you’re glad you’re wearing the sweatshirt so he can’t tell how just this tiny touch is affecting you so greatly. But it’s something in the way he’s looking at you right then--his bottom lip caught beneath his teeth, his eyes on your parted lips--that tells you that somehow he already knows how aroused you are.
You almost close your thighs, squeeze your legs together to do something about that burning need rising between your legs. But your one leg is still draped over Johnny’s, your calf against his. And when you move it just a little, the friction of your skin against his has Johnny breathing more deeply.
There’s a buzz running under your skin, zipping through your veins, and in the moment you forget everything else but that feeling and Johnny making you feel it. 
Your hand covers his on your belly, and you apply just the lightest amount of pressure. His fingers slide so eagerly into your panties.
His breath sounds unsteady, and you’re sure yours does too.
“I’m gonna be so honest right now,” he tells you, his voice barely more than a breath. “I’m so hard, baby. The second you made that little whimper, shit, I felt lightheaded.” You don’t know what whimper he’s talking about, but you don’t care. His fingertips are edging lower and lower inside your panties and in a second he’ll be touching your clit and that’s all you want right now. You almost buck up into his touch.
You grip his wrist before he can, and Johnny freezes. “We don’t have any music,” you tell him. 
Johnny smiles. “Guess you’ll just have to try to keep quiet then, won’t you?”
“Guess you should kiss me again then.” You reply, and Johnny’s only too pleased to satisfy that request.
The moment his mouth is on yours, he’s dipping his fingers lower, his middle finger touching your clit, and he gasps lightly as he feels the heat of your wetness coating his fingers. You can’t believe you’re doing this with Johnny.
He rolls closer, and as he does you can feel his erection against your thigh. 
“You want me to finger you, baby?” His words flow over your lips, swallowed right down by your eagerness. You nod. “I want to hear you say it.”
A new wave of heat bursts in your belly at Johnny’s dominant tone. “I want your fingers, Johnny.” 
He smiles as he kisses you now, pressing his long middle finger inside you in a way that would have you loudly gasping except for his mouth sealed over yours. Johnny curls his finger just right, his palm smoothly moving against your clit as he thrusts his finger inside you, soon adding a second then a third. 
You’re openly panting and moaning into his mouth as he fucks you on his fingers. His other arm is wrapped around your back, bracing you against him as he works you quickly toward an orgasm. His erection is against your thigh, and occasionally you notice him grinding against you, thrusting forward to help with what he needs. But most of his attention is on you, making you feel good.
It’s still some time before dawn when Johnny brings you tumbling over the edge of your climax. Your thighs close around his arm, his fingers still pumping inside you, and you bite his tongue as you cum, and that just makes him moan. 
You’re still shaking from the ecstasy when you break the kiss to drop your head to his shoulder, your breath coming out in shaky puffs.
Johnny kisses your forehead, his damp fingers pull out, slipping out of your panties to rest against your thigh, the other hand strokes your lower back, a relaxing weight keeping you resting against him. You try to move a hand down, wanting to touch him too, but Johnny makes a noise.
“You don’t have to.” His damp fingers close around your wrist. “I’m fine.”
“You’re still hard.” You raise your knee a little so your thigh brushes against where his dick is still full in his underwear. 
His eyes flutter for a moment, his hips grinding forward. 
You lift a hand to touch his hair, tugging lightly to bring his lips to yours as you tilt your head back. “Let me make you feel good, too, Johnny.”
Johnny slides his body over yours smoothly, his body bracketed perfectly by your thighs. You tangle your arms behind his neck, kissing him like your life depends on it as he grinds against you through your panties. 
You can feel him very clearly now. Every inch of him. You wish he was inside you, stretching you wide open, filling you deeply with his length. You kiss him and trace all of those desires against his tongue. Your heart pounds with that desire, breath racing and your nails rake down his back as he picks a good rhythm. You’re going to cum again, you already know it.
“Fuck,” Johnny mumbles into the kiss. “I wish I could cum inside you.”
“Then fuck me.” You gasp back. “Where are condoms?”
His lips slide from yours, over your jaw to your throat. He groans. “In the drawer over there.” But you can tell from the tightness in his voice, from the broken staccato beat of his movements that he’s close, that he probably won’t be able to hold back much longer. Why wait? Why risk putting a pause on this if it might just ruin his orgasm?
You shake your head, tangle your fingers in his hair, guide his lips back to yours. Next time. He can fuck you next time. Right now you just want him to cum; you want him to get you to cum a second time.
A hoarse groan builds in the back of his throat, and Johnny thrusts one last time before he freezes, his cock twitching in his underwear, right against you. You can feel the wet heat of him spreading through the material right against you, and you buck your hips up, chasing your own orgasm even if it means grinding against Johnny’s sensitive cock as he comes down from his high.
Johnny’s mouth feels so soft against yours when you kiss this time as your orgasm crashes through you. Lazy kisses, bodies intertwined. Johnny doesn’t move from between your thighs, just holding himself above you, kissing you slowly and softly.
Morning is breaking outside, though with the heavy winter weather, there’s not too much of a difference visually. 
Eventually Johnny moves away, his hand slides up under your sweatshirt, just touching your bare skin as you both tuck yourself against each other and catch your breath. 
It’s still early. You could roll over to fall back asleep, but even as you consider that, you know it’s too late, you’re already wide awake. Johnny knows it too, so after a handful of moments, he kisses you and then sits up.
“I’m going to shower.” He stands out of bed, tugging uncomfortably at his underwear. You can see the damp spot spread over the front of them, and you hide your smile in his pillow. You made him cum in his pants. It’s cute. You close your eyes and replay that moment, Johnny pressed against your like that, the way he’d moved, the way he’d sounded as he came.
When you open your eyes again, he’s gone. The bathroom door is closed, only a thin sliver of light beneath it and the gentle patter of the shower turning on indicating that Johnny’s behind it.
The dorm is still thick with the sound of sleep, so you’re quiet as you redress and creep out of Johnny’s room. You stand to look out the window in the living room. The world outside is covered in thick snow that continues to fall. Your breath fogs the glass.  
Taeyong’s the first one up, stumbling out of his room in just shorts and a tshirt, shivering as he walks into the kitchen. He pours himself a glass of water, and when he turns around, he spots you and nearly drops the glass. He swears viciously before realizing it’s you.
“Fuck, I’m sorry.” He covers his mouth. “Did you stay here last night?”
You nod. “The weather got worse and I was really tired, so Johnny insisted that I stay.” Taeyong makes a face that you can’t quite decipher before he hides it. “Your schedules are cancelled for the day, by the way. We’re snowed in.”
Taeyong nods. “In that case, I’m going back to bed.” He disappears back into his bedroom, and once more the dorm falls silent.
A shiver works its way down your spine as you yawn. You’re so tired, but you know you can’t go back to sleep, so you go make yourself a strong cup of coffee, watch the snow and think. You think about how what you did with Johnny was a mistake--it was great and you loved it and you can’t truly bring yourself to regret it, but it was a mistake nonetheless because if it gets out, if this becomes serious or ends badly, then it will reflect horribly on your career, and all of your dreams will be flushed away. 
You want Johnny. You love the way he makes you feel. But you know that you shouldn’t indulge. 
And for the next several minutes you sway back and forth on that dangerous line of thought--you want him, but you shouldn’t want him. Maybe you should just leave today, go home, and the next time you see him pretend that the events of last night and this morning never happened. Maybe he’ll forget you’re the Cinderella he spent months searching for.; maybe that was all just a fun game for him anyway, and he’ll lose interest now that he’s found you.
By the time the coffee finishes brewing, you hear the sound of movement in Johnny’s room as he leaves the shower. You pour yourself a mug, another one for him, and then you knock carefully (to not spill the coffees) on his door before opening it.
Johnny’s sitting in bed again, but when he sees you, he sits up and runs his fingers through his hair. 
“Feel better?” you ask him, standing there beside his bed as you offer him one of the coffees. He nods and sips at his coffee, and you look over at the window again, at the steadily falling snow. "I guess I still need to figure out some way to get home.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Johnny murmurs into his coffee. “You can stay here. Stay right here.” He lifts his face out of his mug just long enough to grab your hand and pull you down to sit on his bed. He doesn’t let go of your hand.
You say his name in a warning tone, but it just makes him smile. 
“What?” His thumb rubs gently over your knuckles. “Cinderella kept running away from the Prince because she was scared of her stepmother and stepsisters, right? Well, the Prince found her and they lived happily ever after. I like you. I liked you before I knew you were my Cinderella from Halloween. Finding that out last night or this morning or whatever, that’s just a bonus. I like you in case what we did earlier didn’t make that obvious, and if you like me too, well we can find a way to be together even if our wicked company tries their best to keep it from happening.”
You feel very warm all of a sudden, possibly its the coffee or the bulky sweater Johnny had let you borrow, or it could very well be that he’s confessing to you. Confessing in such a cheesy manner, too. He has feelings for you. For you, not for the Cinderella fantasy version of you. 
You push the sleeves of the sweater up your arms, trying to cool down some.
“Johnny.” You know that nothing good can come of what he’s suggesting.
“Don’t say my name like that,” he says softly. “Don’t say it like it’s a no. Don’t say it like you want me but you can’t. We already started down this path, so don’t turn your back on this, please. Say my name like you agree with me, like you like me too.” 
“Johnny.” This time you put your longing for him behind those two syllables. You try your best to make it sound like a yes. 
You want Johnny. You want this to work. And if he believes in it, then you want to too. But you won’t let this affect your dream. You’ll have Johnny and you’ll have your dream job too. You can figure it out as you go.
Johnny grins. “Yeah, that sounds much better.” He takes a drink of his coffee again, watching you over the lip of the mug, then says, “I can’t get over how a few months ago I wanted to learn your name and now you’re having breakfast with me in my sweater.”
“Coffee is hardly breakfast, Johnny. Please tell me that you know that.” You groan, prying the coffee mug out of his hands.
He shrugs and grins, watching as you sit his mug and your own on his bedside table. And then he reaches for you, pulling you into his lap so you’re face-to-face. Johnny kisses you slowly, deeply, and when he pulls away, he murmurs, “All I know for now is that you’re my mysterious Cinderella, you’re wearing my sweater, I can still smell you in my sheets, and we have no plans for the rest of the day. If you’d like, I’d love to make you cum again.”
Oh God, you think to yourself, what have you gotten yourself into?
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a/n: so months and months ago back when I was accepting requests based off a prompt list, someone sent me a prompt for Johnny to use both “No, like…. It’s just, I can’t believe you’re actually wearing my clothes.” and “I can’t get over how a few months ago I wanted to learn your name and now you’re having breakfast with me in my sweater.” and thus this was born
I wouldn’t have taken so long to write this, and I’m really really sorry to the original requester (especially since I know I’ve messaged them and let them know it would take a while, but damn I don’t think either of us thought it would take this long, and I checked and they haven’t been active on their blog in a while, so now I feel bad) but I got distracted with writing the next part of the poly series (which was Adore You) and then forgot about this for a brief time, and then once I remembered I was deep into working on the poly finale, so I had to focus on it. But now I’ve finished that! And I’ve finished this too, so if the original requester is still around and sees this then I’m sorry it took so long please forgive me! I would tag them, but I’m not entirely sure if they wanted to be tagged in this or not!
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Text
Meant To Be ~ 10
MEANT TO BE MASTERLIST
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< previous chapter
Word Count: 1,500ish
Summary: Prep work for the Gala begins.
The gala was announced the next day, with the invites following a few days later. Y/N had decided that she should start working in the office again, especially to help make decisions about the gala. Wanda was beyond excited to help Y/N, and Pepper, with the planning.
“So…” Wanda started as she and Y/N worked on sending the L/N Company invites out for the gala. “Are you and Stark going to the gala together?”
“Wanda,” Y/N scolded, playfully.
“What? It’s a valid question.”
“No, Stark and I won’t be attending the gala together. Yes, we are hosting it together but we don’t need to be each other’s dates to do so. Will you have a date?”
“Actually…”
“Wanda! Who?”
“There’s this guy I’ve been talking to and he actually works for Stark Industries.”
“What’s his name?”
“Vision.”
“Vision. That’s… unique.”
“I thought so too. But he’s… so nice and smart and just… a really good guy.”
“Have you meet him in person before?”
“Once. I’m excited to go to the gala with him.”
“I’m excited for you.”
“If you’re not going with Stark, are you going to take a date?”
“I don’t think so. I’m fine going by myself to these things. Besides, sometimes half the fun is spending the night with someone new.” 
“Y/N!” Wanda laughed as she playfully swatted at her. 
~~~
“So how did that ‘not date’ with Y/N go?” Rhodey asked as him and Tony talked over the phone. “Were you honest with her about everything?”
“Well…”
“Tony. You can’t be serious.”
“She knows about the gala! You saw the announcement.”
“But she doesn’t know about the proposed merge?”
“I will tell her!”
“When Tony?”
“When I feel like it’s right!”
Rhodey let out a frustrated sigh. “Tony. I know—I get why you don’t want to ruin what’s happening between you and Y/N right now. You two are fixing your relationship and making progress and it’s really fragile right now. And I am so happy that my two friends are fixing their shit. But, Tony, the longer you wait to tell her, the bigger the fall out will be. You have to tell her. Sooner than later.”
“I know… I know… I’ll tell her. I just… I can’t lose her again, Rhodes. I just can’t.”
“I understand that. But, at this rate, you really might.”
“Yeah… yeah… I’ll figure it out… you bringing a date?”
“No, but I have some army friends that want to come. I think you and Y/N, mostly Y/N though, would like them.”
“Sure. Feel free. Just let me or Pepper know names and we’ll get invites sent to them.”
“Thanks. I’ve got to run but, Tony, tell her. Before it’s too late or someone else does. Tell her.”
~~~
After a long day at work, Y/N went home to her Grandmother’s house. She walked in and headed straight for the kitchen. She slipped a froze meal into the microwave to cook before she started for her bedroom. Y/N was about half way there with the doorbell rang. She furrowed her brows and walked to the door. Opening it, there was a delivery man with a large arrangement of many types of flowers on her doorstep.
“Y/N L/N?” He wondered.
“That’s me,” she replied.
“These are for you.” He handed over the large arrangement. “Seems you have quite the admirer. They bought the most expensive arrangement.”
“Thank you for delivering them.”
“Mhm. Have a good evening.”
“You too.” 
Y/N shut the door with her hip before heading back to the kitchen. She sighed as she set the arrangement down on the island and began examining it. It really was a gorgeous arrangement and she didn’t even have to wonder as to who it was from. There was only one possible option. Looking through the arrangement, Y/N found a small envelope. She opened it and pulled out the note sitting in it.
Thank you for being okay about the gala. Be my date? ~ A.E.S.
Y/N rolled her eyes as she set the note on the counter. She knew that with Tony, it wasn’t really a question. He was just trying to make it seem like she had a choice in being his date or not. The microwave rang out and Y/N grabbed her food and her phone before sitting down at the island. After taking a bite of her food, she took her phone and texted Tony.
Me: Your date, huh?
It didn’t take long for Tony to answer.
Anthony Edward: yes. Besides the fact that we should as hosts, I would really like you by my side that night.
Y/N bit her lip as she read Tony’s response. She knew that she had told Wanda that she wasn’t going with Tony and that she didn’t need a date. But she admittedly was enjoying the time that she was reconnecting with Tony. She wasn’t going to make it easy for him though.
Me: The only reason I’m saying yes is because we’re co-hosting the gala.
Anthony Edward: I’ll take it. 
Anthony Edward: Have you bought a dress yet?
Me: No. I was planning on shopping this weekend.
Anthony Edward: Don’t bother. I’ll have it sent over immediately.
Me: Sent over immediately? Stark. You didn’t.
Anthony Edward: No returns. I’ve already bought a matching tie.
Me: This isn’t the prom. This is a professional gala. For work.
Anthony Edward: Don’t worry, the dress is professional.
Me: Wasn’t talking about the dress.
Anthony Edward: Rude.
Anthony Edward: I’m never not professional.
Me: Sure. Whatever you say.
Me: So when should I expect the dress?
Anthony Edward: All in good time, my dear. All in good time.
Anthony Edward: I’m going to try and make it to see you before the gala. I have something I need to talk to you about.
Y/N suddenly filled with worry. What could Tony possibly need to talk to her about?
Me: Is everything alright?
Anthony Edward: I hope it will be.
Anthony Edward: I know you’re probably tired from work, so I’ll let you get to bed. Let me know when you get your dress.
Y/N didn’t like how quickly Tony was trying to change the subject and leave the conversation. She was growing concerned about what he needed to talk to her about.
Me: Are you sure everything’s okay?
Anthony Edward: Everything’s fine, Y/N/N. I promise. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Sleep tight.
Y/N sighed, setting the phone down. What was she going to do with that man?
~~~
Y/N was in her office with Wanda the next day when a box was delivered. The box was golden and large with a red ribbon tied around it.
“Who’s that from?” Wanda asked, coming to see the box sitting on Y/N’s desk.
“Uh… Tony,” Y/N responded.
“I thought you said you two weren’t dating?”
“We aren’t. Last night he asked me to be his date and I told him yes.”
“You did?! Oh my gosh that’s so exciting!”
“It’s strictly professional, Wanda. It just makes sense with us co-hosting the gala and all.”
“Sure. Whatever you say.” Y/N nervously fiddled with the ribbon. “So… are you going to open it?”
“I’ll a little nervous to see what’s inside.”
“Do you have a clue as to what Stark is sending you?”
“I do. I just don’t know if I’m ready to see it.”
“Well I could—“
“Sorry, Wanda, could you actually leave me alone for a second?”
“Of course. Let me know when you need me again.”
Wanda quickly grabbed all her things and left Y/N’s office, making sure the door was closed behind her. Y/N sighed as she finally untied the ribbon front the large box. She took the top off, resting it on the floor against the desk. There was a card in the box on top of layers of tissue paper. Y/N took the card and opened it.
I can’t wait to see you in this. I hope you like it as much as I do. ~ A.E.S.
A small smile forced it’s way onto Y/N’s lips. She set the card down before standing up to get a better vantage point of the box. Carefully, Y/N pulled the tissue paper aside to reveal a red satin dress. She stared at it in awe as she pulled it out, revealing that it was a floor length dress. It was gorgeous and very classy. Y/N hated to admit, as she studied the dress, that Tony had picked the perfect dress for her. How is it, after all that time apart, that Tony still knew her better than anyone?
“Damn it,” Y/N muttered as she dropped the dress and fell back into her chair. “I’m in love with Tony Stark.
next chapter >
NOTES: angst will happen in the next chapter. be prepared.
Taglist Information
MEANT TO BE TAGLIST
@fyreball66
@23victoria (won’t link)
@babypink224221​
@ravishingreid​
@dcvilslvr (won’t link)
@ur-mom21 (won’t link)
@some-lovely-day​
@rubberduckyqueen​
@justtnat​
@utterly-in-like​
@underoostarks​
@mixedfandxms​
@ccbsrms​
@ducks118​
@whore-for-fictional-men (won’t link)
@ts1mp0ne​
@ambria​
@incognisantbirdy​
@smokeywhalee​
@sl79​
@krazyk99​
@cringe-13 (won’t link)
@samzie​
@osugahunnyicedtea​
@hcloangcls (won’t link)
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heyyyharry · 3 years
Text
Happier
(inspired by happier by Olivia Rodrigo)
Word count: 2.4k
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I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go So find someone great, but don't find no one better I hope you're happy, but don't be happier
Part 1: Drivers License
Part 2: Deja Vu
A/N: I edited the original lyrics to match the POV :)
.
.
.
Harry had come up with a thousand scenarios of how this day would play out. Actually, he’d been thinking of this day since the moment he’d received the news. He didn’t dare to hope that she’d say yes to coming back for a sequel. He’d been sure that they would write her character off, give a lame excuse for how his love interest could not make a return and make his character forget about her completely to move on with a new girl in town. It would have been great if it was that easy in real life. Once someone was written off the script, they were gone for good. Real-life relationships were not that simple. Goodbye didn’t mean ‘never see you again’. You would still share the same friend circle and social bubbles, and it was worse when you two worked in the same industry. Harry didn’t know how he’d lasted a year without running into her, not since the Grammys.
“Didn’t you two date?”
“No.” Harry shook his head, but his eyes stayed glued on Y/N from across the room. She wasn’t looking his way, too busy saying hello to everyone else. “No,” he repeated, more to himself than to his co-star. “We didn’t.”
“But she wrote an entire album about you,” said the other twin. What was her name again? Lulu?
“Luna!” cried her sister, Lex. “You can’t ask him that!”
“No, it’s okay,” Harry said with a tight smile, slightly annoyed by the blonde twins, but he didn’t want to seem like an ass on the first day of filming. “And I don’t know if it was for me. You should ask Y/N.”
“Ask me what?”
Harry flinched when he looked up and saw Y/N padding towards them. She hugged the twins, who seemed way too excited. Harry guessed they were Y/N’s fans. They gave off crazy fangirl vibes, probably just pretending not to know the drama to interrogate him. He couldn’t blame them for assuming he was the villain and definitely could not blame Y/N for portraying him as one. It was more important that he knew who he was and how much he had changed since his last relationship. Maybe they could finally be friends.
“Were they bothering you?” Y/N asked him once the twins had left.
Harry nodded. “They’re your friends?”
“Oh, I met them last year on tour. I’m surprised you don’t know them. They were on Disney.”
“I don’t watch Disney,” Harry admitted with a smile. “Well, not today’s Disney.”
“Understandable.” Y/N nodded and bit her lip. She seemed guarded with her straight back and hands hidden behind her. She eyed him up and down, quite subtle yet noticeable. “How have you been?”
“Pretty good,” he said, nodding slowly. “You?”
“Yeah, but mostly tired because of tour.”
“You’re done?”
“Yup, last night was the last show.”
“Nice.”
Y/N raised an eyebrow. “Nice?”
Harry blinked. “Did I say something wrong?”
“No.” Y/N giggled. “You still sound very...you.”
“Well, shouldn’t I?”
“Yeah, you should. But it’s been a year so…I mean, you haven’t changed much.”
“Right,” he said lowly, his eyes falling to his feet. Harry supposed he should say something else, perhaps bringing up another random topic to discuss, but all he could think about was what had happened between them. Things had been messy, hadn’t they? How could they go back to before that? Before her first song about him. Before he’d chosen someone else over her.
Or he could talk about her new relationship. She’d been in a happy relationship for almost six months, right? No wait, hadn’t they broke up two weeks ago? He wasn’t sure because he hadn’t been catching up. If they’d broken up, he’d sound like an ass to even mention her ex’s name. He should just stay quiet.
“I’ll see you later?” she said, gesturing at her stylist who was waiting by the door.
Harry could ask her right now -- the reason she’d agreed to film the sequel to their first movie together. He’d heard from a very reliable source that she’d specifically asked her agent to decline any project that he was in. So did this mean they were good? That she didn’t hate him anymore? He could have gathered his courage and got the answer right then…
“Yeah, see you.”
...but he didn’t.
And so she gave him a smile and a little wave, then happily returned to her stylist.
.
.
.
“See you tomorrow, Y/N!”
“See you, Annie!” Y/N said as she put the rest of her things into her tote bag. Her new driver had got her schedule mixed up, and so she had to wait here for another half an hour. She was in no rush. It had been a light first day, and she’d had a fun time getting to know the new cast members and catching up with old friends.
She sat on the sofa in the lobby, legs crossed, texting her best friend about her day. She’d purposely left out the short off-screen conversation with Harry, and her best friend didn’t even bother to ask. In their world, he didn’t exist, and his name was censored in every conversation like a curse word that was even worse than ‘cunt’. Nevertheless, she didn’t hate him anymore. She was doing just fine on her own, being busy with her career, and she’d been in a happy relationship after her fall out with him.
She and the guy, a model, had broken up two weeks ago due to long distance and some differences that they could not change. They had ended on good terms and decided to stay friends. They said you could only stay friends with your ex when you still had feelings for each other, or you had never loved each other that much in the first place. For her, it was probably the latter. Her previous relationship had been more platonic than romantic, apparently. So she had nothing but the best to say about him.
As she was going through her camera roll, just reminiscing about the past, she heard footsteps approaching and looked up to find Harry. He offered a smile and gestured to the spot beside her on the sofa. “May I sit here? My ride is late.”
“Yeah, sure.” She hurriedly scooted over.
“Good job today,” he said. “You were great.”
“Thanks, so were you.” She smiled, and they both looked away at the same time. This was so awkward. She hated small talk. She’d never had to have small talk with Harry. Conversations with him used to be so easy and natural and silly. Whatever this was, it wasn’t them.
“Can we just be normal?”
At first, Y/N thought she’d been the one who’d said it, so when she realised it’d been Harry, she was speechless.
He swallowed and sat a bit straighter, still not looking at her. “I don’t want us to be weird and awkward.”
“Okay,” she said.
He cleared his throat. “Wanna try again?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Okay, not to sound like an ass but when Joey kept forgetting his lines, I was so pissed off, I could throw a chair at the wall.”
“Right?!” exclaimed Y/N, feeling free to have finally broken out of her shell. “Like, he doesn’t even have many lines. I know he’s new but damn...you can’t get far if you don’t learn your goddamn lines.”
Harry shook with laughter. “Oh God, we sound like dicks, don’t we?”
“Maybe.” Y/N laughed, covering her mouth. “But you know what? We can’t be nice in this industry. It’s impossible.”
“Shhh, if someone heard this, we would be into big trouble.”
“Oh please, I’ve had worse articles written about me than ‘Y/N speaks facts about her lazy co-star’.”
Harry tossed his head back and cackled. “The worst one I’ve got this week was ‘Harry Styles hates therapists.’”
“What?!” Y/N gasped. “No way! That’s so stupid!”
“Right?” Harry rolled his eyes. “I could get all my therapists to speak up for me but I’m kinda immune to bullshit now.”
“Therapists? Like plural?”
“Yeah, one in every city.”
“Damn.”
“Yeah.”
Y/N rubbed her hands onto her legs. “Rough year?”
Harry’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as he leaned back. “You have no idea.” Then he swept his hair out of his eyes, sucked in a breath, and finally looked at her. “I wish I could have talked to you, though.”
She bit her tongue, knowing what she was about to say next would disappoint her best friend so much, but she had to. “So do I.”
Harry looked taken aback before his lips curled into a smile. “It’s silly, isn’t it? I haven’t talked to you in a year, and I feel like I know everything that’s happened to you except that I don’t.”
What he’d just said might make no sense for most people, but Y/N knew exactly what he meant. She nodded and wetted her lip. “You only know as much as everyone else does.”
“Yeah, I got updates on you from the news and our friends.”
“Same.” Y/N smiled back. “I hate how they write articles about your new haircut but not mine.”
“I like your new hair colour.”
“Thanks. I like your new car.”
Then they both burst out laughing. It was fun and also a little bit strange that Y/N didn’t feel the same anxiety talking to him as she used to. It must be because they had grown and were now meeting again as better people.
“Damn, my ride's here,” Y/N said as she read the text from her driver. “I gotta go now.”
“Oh, okay.” Harry stood up and followed Y/N to the entrance. “Hey, just wondering--”
“Yeah?”
“Am I...am I still blocked?” He looked a bit flustered as she tilted her head and squinted her eyes. “On your phone. Because I remember you having my number blocked--”
“I unblocked you on your birthday.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yeah.” Y/N shrugged. “I should’ve sent you a happy birthday text but...I didn’t want your girlfriend to get the wrong ideas.”
“My ex.”
“Yeah, I know.”
They smiled at each other one last time before saying goodbye. Y/N knew it was silly, but she was hoping he would go after her.
Ding.
A notification popped up when she was in the car. She was almost home, and it was from Harry’s number. He’d sent her a link with a message that said, “Hope you like it :)”.
Curious, she tapped on it and was directed to an audio file titled ‘Track 5’. The upload date was last year. About two weeks after their short conversation at the Grammys.
Hurriedly, she fumbled inside her bag for her iPods and put it on before she pressed play.
“Hey, Jeff, I couldn’t sleep so I wrote this song. Listen and let me know if it should go on the album.”
Then came the piano intro. It sounded good, so Y/N wondered how it hadn’t ended up on his last album.
But when he started to sing...
We ended a while ago Your friends are mine, you know, I know You've moved on, found someone new One more guy who brings out the better in you
And I thought my heart was detached From all the sunlight of our past But he’s so nice, he’s so funny Does he mean you forgot about me?
Oh, I hope you're happy But not like how you were with me I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go So find someone great, but don't find no one better I hope you're happy, but don't be happier
And does he tell you you’re the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen? An eternal love bullshit he might not even mean Remember when you were with me I meant it when you heard it first from me
And now I'm pickin' him apart Like cuttin' him down will make you miss my wretched heart But he’s charming, he looks kind He probably gives you butterflies
I hope you're happy But not like how you were with me I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go So find someone great, but don't find no one better
I hope you're happy I wish you all the best, really Say you love him, baby Just not like you loved me And think of me fondly when your hands are on him I hope you're happy, but don't be happier
The song was for her. He’d written it when her new relationship had gone public. Y/N sat there, staring blankly ahead until the honking of a car tore open her inner peace, and reality came crashing back in. The driver dropped her off at her house. Instead of going inside, she stood on her front steps and replayed the song one more time. When it ended, she decided to text him: Why didn’t this make it to the album?
She didn’t know where he was now, but it showed ‘typing’ in less than a second, as if he’d been waiting in their chat since he’d sent that link.
You would’ve hated me, Y/N.
True, she replied. Still, I would’ve loved the song lowkey. And added, I love it btw.
He took so long to type that it was driving her crazy. She flopped down on the concrete stair with her phone clutched in her hands, her heart thundering against her ribcage. Anxiety popped like a balloon when his message appeared: Were you happier?
She reread it again and again.
No.
I wasn’t either, he responded. I kept getting deja vu.
Ha, nice reference.
That song is my guilty pleasure. Love listening to you roasting me on loop.
That last message made Y/N bury her face into her palm and giggle like a fool. She thought for a second and wrote: I could come roast you in person now if that’s what you prefer. I think we’ve never had a proper roasting.
Can we meet, Y/N? Or are you busy now?
No, not busy.
Great, I’ll pick you up.
Just tell me where, she responded with a smile on her face. I got my drivers license now :)
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nitewrighter · 3 years
Note
for the teen Titans ficlet thing, I don’t suppose you could do “there was only one bed” for robin and starfire?
*slams fist down on table* STARFIRE IS THE BIG SPOON.
----
"I think you are overacting," Starfire said, her arms folded across her garish tye-dyed nightshirt.
"Overreacting," Robin corrected, adjusting the waistband on his sweats as he stepped out of the bathroom, "And--I'm not. I've slept in lean-tos in the Alaskan hinterland and in literal trees in the Virunga mountains. I can handle a hotel floor."
Starfire scoffed. "You are being ridiculous! It is a bed! There is room for two! Plenty of my people sleep in Tesh'li!"
"Er..." Robin gave her a blank look and Starfire seemed to realize that that word hadn't translated over.
"Uhm..." Starfire's brow furrowed for a few seconds as she struggled for the closest english equivalent, "Tesh'li are like... clusters? P-piles? It is very common for families."
"...Tamaraneans sleep in piles?" Robin's brow crinkled at the mental image.
" Tesh'li. 'Piles' implies gravity is a strong factor in the composition of bodies," said Starfire.
"...right, floating..." Robin said quietly.
"The whole team had a big Tesh'li in that cave when we had that mission in Markovia!" Starfire said, clearly frustrated, "Beast Boy turned into a grizzly bear and Cyborg turned off his cooling systems to share body heat! You and Raven even shared your capes! Why is this worse? Am I worse?"
"It's not worse--I mean obviously you're not worse-- it's just---when it's just two people--" Robin drew in a tense breath through his teeth before slumping his shoulders, defeated. "It's like... an earth... thing."
"I am aware that earth has many things," said Starfire, clearly not satisfied with this answer.
Robin sighed.
"Oh!" Starfire perked up, "It is one of your earth intimacy hangups! Because large portions of your population spent several centuries convincing yourselves that your natural instinct to be close and reproduce were affronts to your creator deities! And that still lingers in your cultural practices!"
"Uh..." Robin didn't really have a response to that.
"I have been reading the Earth histories," said Starfire, a little smugly.
"That's great," said Robin, meekly.
“Well it is not like any of ‘the funny business’ will be happening,” said Starfire, using the finger quotes around the words ‘funny business.’ Robin really regretted letting Beast Boy teach her how to make air quotes with her fingers and that she had only been getting better at figuring out when to use them. “But I will respect your cultural practice and let you sleep on the floor, even though that is dumb and a little gross and you will wake up with the aching back.”
"You sure are a diplomat, huh?" said Robin, drily.
“Mm-hmm!” Starfire nodded.
This was supposed to be a victory in the argument for Robin--since Starfire was recognizing the boundaries he was laying out, but who was he laying them out for if she didn’t care about them? Himself? Alfred had made a point of bringing him up to be ‘proper’ and ‘gentlemanly’ (perhaps to make up for some shortcomings with Bruce) but Robin’s own childhood in the Circus was closer to what Starfire was describing--the performers spent so much time traveling and setting up and breaking down the circus that they had to catch sleep when they could, sleeping in piles, often with little regard for gender or age. He remembered sleeping splayed across his parents’ laps when he was small, or with his cheek smushed against Samson the Strongman’s bicep, or even in the pile of poodles, borzois, and border collies that made up the act of ‘Rivka’s Fabulous Tumbling Dogs.’ Sometimes he would even wake up with white greasepaint smudged in his hair from sleeping on one of the clowns’ shoulders. But now here he was, feeling like a bit of an idiot as Starfire pulled some sheets off the bed and the extra pillow and handed them over to him, before plopping down cross-legged on the bed herself and turning on the hotel room TV. 
“Did you want to watch something?” Starfire glanced at him.
“I’m fine with whatever you want to watch,” Robin shrugged.
Robin took the uncomfortable wooden chair next to the too-small hotel table where their mostly-eaten one-half pepperoni one half pineapple-anchovy pizza sat. Starfire quickly flicked through the channels until reaching a public access channel where a reindeer bellowed on the screen.
“The noble caribou,” the narrator spoke, “A proud fixture of the tundras of the north that have roamed these grass-covered polar deserts for thousands of years.”
Robin gave a glance over to Starfire who was lying on her stomach on the bed and kicking her feet back and forth, her chin in her hands like any preppy teenaged earth girl watching her favorite low-budget cringeworthy high school drama starring 29-year-olds.
“But this is not a story of the caribou, no we will focus on a friend who has been here even longer,” the camera panned down to a caribou gnawing some knotty, netted-looking substance from the ground, “That industrious, unsung hero: The lichen. This is... Life of Lichen.” 
“What happened to ‘World of Fungus?’” Robin tilted his head.
“You remembered?” Starfire perked up.
“I mean it’s your favorite,” Robin shrugged, “Or I guess this is your new favorite?”
“Life of Lichen is the sequel!” Starfire said excitedly, “Technically it is the third sequel. The first was ‘Our Friend the Algae,’ the second was, ‘World of Fungus’ and now it is ‘Life of Lichen!’ Because you need both algae and fungus to create it,” She paused a bit, “I can... change it if you prefer something else though.”
“Nah I kind of like it. It’s calming,” said Robin, “I used to only research stuff for like... missions and investigations... it’s nice to just... be interested in things.” He craned in his seat a little to see better.
“There is room,” said Starfire, scooting herself over, “You can see better here.”
Robin paused for a few seconds, then got up and took a seat on the bed, propping some pillows up against the headboard for himself to lean against. 
“While lichen bears superficial similarity to moss, there are many differences, the first starting with composition. Mosses, of course, are plants, while lichens are composite organisms, there are over 20,000 known species...” The documentary narrator continued talking as the camera panned across a rainbow of lichens on the side of a rock and Robin found his eyelids drooping, 
He could have sworn he only rested his eyes for a few minutes when he suddenly startled awake. Most of the hotel room lights were off, save for the bedside lamp, the credits were running on the TV and the previews were next week’s episode were promising to delve into the exciting world of lichens growing on trees, as opposed to this episode which mainly featured lichens growing on rocks.
“Starfire?” Robin said, his voice hoarse with sleepiness.
“Mm?” Starfire was already turning around and fluffing up her pillow, the faint green glow of her eyes creating a low spooky light in the room.
“The floor’s kinda gross,” said Robin.
“The floor is indeed gross,” said Starfire.
“Is it cool if--”
“It is very cool,” said Starfire. She reached and got the pillow he had on the floor next to the bed and passed it over to him.
“Alright,” Robin got under the sheets. Maybe he would have found more energy to be flustered about the action if he hadn’t been lulled by an hour of a husky British accent talking about lichens. Starfire seemed to be respecting his ‘earth intimacy hangups’ and slept on her side with her back to him.
“G’night,” said Robin.
“Sleep well,” Starfire’s voice was half muffled into her pillow as he turned off the bedside lamp.
It didn’t take too long for Starfire’s breathing to go slow and rhythmic, but Robin was still staring at the ceiling. 
God, I made that weird, he thought, Why did I have to make such a big deal about sleeping on the floor? I mean I literally was repeatedly saying it’s not a big deal and it wasn’t but now it’s a whole thing. What if she thinks I don’t like her? What if she knows I like her but she’s really pushing the alien thing so we don’t have to address it? No that’s awful, she wouldn’t do that--earth means too much to her to do that. That was shitty of me to think. ‘Earth Intimacy hangups.’ I don’t have earth intimacy hangups. I should probably let her know that it’s probably not cool to tell people they have ‘earth intimacy hangups’ right to their face. I’m cool with it though. Because I don’t make big deals of things. I mean it wouldn’t be a big deal to sleep on the floor. Oh god I’m obsessing over this. 
He turned on his side so that he was facing her back in the bed. He stared at her, watching her shoulders slowly shift with her breath. He tried to match the pace of his breath to hers. 
Tesh’li, huh? he thought, and he felt his eyelids get heavy. He imagined a distant world with high-ceilinged palaces, and a family sleeping in a pile on a heap of luxurious cushions and circular futons, one of their two daughters hovering upside-down just above them. His eyelids slowly slid shut, Doesn’t sound so bad...
He woke up at 2 in the morning drowning in hair.
Starfire was hovering about a half foot off the bed, half the blankets hanging off of her, still in that same ‘lying on her side’ position, though now angled so that the majority of her hair was piled directly on Robin’s face. Robin sputtered quietly, pushing hair out of his eyes and mouth and flinching hard as he realized Starfire was floating.
“Star-pft-fire?” he whispered hoarsely, still pushing hair from his face.
“Robinnn... Kan’ah peq lor-faon eshdarm...” Starfire murmured in Tamaranean.
“...What?” Robin said blankly before she dropped back down onto the bed with a bounce and a loud creak of mattress springs, still dead asleep. A cat-like snore escaped her as she readjusted herself in the blankets. Robin breathed in a steadying breath, coming to terms with what he had just seen and how it was all perfectly normal what with Starfire being an alien. Then he repeated that last mental sentence back to himself and wondered how long ago this work had claimed his sanity like it had claimed Bruce’s. He didn’t have long to dwell on that thought, however, as Starfire turned over in her sleep, wrapped her arms around him, and pulled him close, her alien strength moving him with the same ease as she might grab a stuffed animal.
“Star?” Robin whispered again as her arm snaked over his chest. He felt her body pressing into him from behind. His face was burning. 
“Hmm... Wurul tai horqarr, Silkie...” she mumbled, squeezing Robin close.
“Er.. Star--I’m not--Ggk!” Robin winced a little at the tight squeeze, wondering for a few seconds if he was going to get a broken rib,  but then Starfire seemed to nuzzle her cheek against his hair and her grip relaxed with a slight sigh.
Her hair was still enveloping him in a river of orange. She was warm--warmer than any human he could remember, and being in her arms felt like that almost- too-warm that’s perfect for dozing off while reading on summer afternoons. She smelled like ozone, and Lapsang-Souchong tea, and fresh-cut citrus. He wondered how he smelled to her. If he smelled like a memory of another planet. He listened to her breathing for a few minutes longer, as the warmth of her sank into him. He felt the exhaustion he always felt like he was barely outrunning catch up to him again, but here he was willing to let it overtake him.
Maybe I should wake her up? I mean... alien strength... don’t want to get crushed if she has a weird dream or something. Probably the smart thing to do, he thought.
“Zontar-ha peq lor-yuur’vyn...”  Starfire murmured in her sleep and readjusted herself against him again, her body curving around him. 
Eh. There are worse ways to go, he thought as he closed his eyes.
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watchmegetobsessed · 3 years
Text
ALL IS FAIR
a/n: woohoo!! finally a harry fic! lol sorry i got very into marvel these past weeks but im finally bringing you some harry content! this one was originally requested by an anon sometime and then we kept talking about it until i actually got around to write it! hopefully you’ll like it and if you do, please like and reblog!
pairing: ceo!Harry x ceo!plussize!reader
warning: sexual content
word count: 16.7k
masterlist
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“Stop being such a stuck up dick, it’s your birthday, bro!”
Harry rolls his eyes at his friend who walks into his penthouse as if he owned. Niall Horan was so well-known in Harry’s building that he could have easily walked into any homes in the tower and people would still welcome him warmly. It might have a few things to do with the fact that half of the residents in the Compass Tower are women who are hopelessly in love with either Niall or Harry, hoping for a chance to drag either of them into their bed one day. They have a lot more chance to do that with the Irish bloke than with Mr. Styles. Not that Harry doesn’t find them attractive, but he is not the type to have one night stands, something his friend gives him quite a lot of shit for.
“Would you fuck off for twenty more minutes?” Harry sighs, shooting him a look as he covers the speaker of his phone, in the middle of a call.
“You have ten minutes and we are leaving. I’m not letting you work on the night of your thirtieth birthday!” Niall warns him before walking into the kitchen to roam the always full, neatly stocked fridge.
As much as Niall Horan comes off as an irresponsible cocky child, he is quite the businessman himself as well. As the Lawyer of one third of New York’s most influential people, he surely doesn’t have to worry about making a living, enjoying his luxurious apartment a few streets away from Harry’s place on the Upper East Side. It’s not as expensive and impressive as Harry’s penthouse on the top of the tower his father built in the heart of the posh neighborhood most people only know from TV shows, but he couldn’t complain.
“Another designer refused to sign with us, H. We are running out of options,” Lambert’s voice rings through the phone as Harry turns to the floor to ceiling window, staring out to the city skyline in front of him.
“We have quite a few left, right?” Harry asks clenching his jaw.
“Yeah, but I heard that Cometa is planning on announcing something big next week so I think a lot of them are waiting for that to happen.”
“Do you think it’s another collab? But they just had fucking Chanel have a line sold through them!” Harry growls, his blood boiling at even just the thought.
When it comes to fashion in the virtual world, there are two businesses that totally dominate the industry. In the men’s wear, Twisted is definitely the number one selling place. The idea started off as just a freshman school project that originally wanted to sell tech stuff, but a few years into the project Harry met Lambert who was already a rising star in the fashion industry and they joined forces, creating the most classic yet affordable and user friendly online empire: Twisted. Though Twisted mostly features men’s clothing, they’ve been trying to venture to the field of women’s fashion, but it hasn’t been as easy as they thought it to be. And the reason for that is Cometa.
Cometa was originally a website where anyone could sell their own clothes, make their online wardrobe sale. But eventually the business grew itself out and stepped up a few levels, collaborating with various designers and brands, selling exclusive lines and a highly praised seasonal variety four times a year, earning a well-deserved top spot in the online fashion industry. It’s hard to compete with what Julia Bianchi built up through sweat and blood and Harry Styles has been working on stepping up to be a major competition for Cometa in women’s fashion, with not much luck so far.
To top the cake with a delicious looking cherry, Cometa has been trying to set feet into men’s fashion as well in the recent years, bringing out several lines with some mentionable designers, but they never made it be as big as Twisted. The two businesses have been trying to outdo each other for about a decade now, with not much luck so far and Harry’s patience is running low by now.
“I don’t know what it is, but keep an eye out. I’ll call you on Monday, alright?” Lambert sighs through the line.
“Okay, thank you,” Harry nods, feeling a little defeated.
“And happy birthday, man. Go and celebrate!” he chuckles, making Harry’s lips curl up as well.
“Thanks, have a good weekend,” Harry bids his goodbye before the call ends.
Wandering into the kitchen Harry finds Niall with the thickest ham and cheese sandwich between his hands, sitting at the kitchen island.
“So where exactly are we going tonight?” he asks, grabbing himself a granola bar as he joins the Irish lad on the stool next to him.
“Oh, that’s a surprise,” he grins, mouth full as he chews mercilessly. Harry grimaces, not sure how this is the same man who can convince a judge about basically anything, wearing his designer suits, putting on an intimidating and serious act for his cases.
“I have a switch,” Niall once told him when he asked how he does it. “I just turn it off when I’m off the clock.”
“You know I hate surprises,” Harry informs him matter-of-factly, but Niall doesn’t seem to be bothered by his comment.
“You’re thirty now, no one cares what you hate.”
“Says who?” Harry huffs.
“Me,” he grins, making Harry roll his eyes.
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The bass is throbbing, red tinted lights illuminating the exclusive bar in the heart of Manhattan where Niall chose to gather some of Harry’s close friends to celebrate his thirtieth birthday. Sitting in the leather couches at a restricted area at the back of the place, they are hidden enough not to draw too much attention to themselves but still feel like they are part of the party.
“Cheers to three decades of this cocky motherfucker!” Niall beams as their glasses meet in the middle, everyone laughing and wishing Harry a happy birthday before they all chug their drinks.
Harry is not necessarily the type of person to enjoy going out too often, but he admits it’s been a while since the last time he let loose. It feels nice to have the evening to himself, leaving the business behind for just a couple of hours before he returns to his busy everydays.
Though the occasion is Harry’s birthday, Niall is surely enjoying the evening a tad bit more than his friend. After Harry sees him send down three tequilas in a row he realizes it’s not gonna end well if he doesn’t get some water into his system as well. Excusing himself from the group he heads to the bar, pushing his way through the dancing bodies until he finally reaches his destination.
Given how it’s a Friday evening, the place is packed and he waits in the line patiently while the bartender is fixing up the order of a group of girls a few stools down from Harry. Leaning onto the counter Harry runs his gaze over the dancing crowd, tapping his fingers against the surface to the beat, even bopping his head a little when he feels a push from behind him.
“Oh, sorry!” A female voice calls out and as he turns around he spots the owner of it, a young woman, her curvy body wrapped in a tight mini dress that leaves very little to Harry’s imagination as his eyes run up and down her figure. He has never seen a curvy girl as confident as her, she is radiating, drawing every male’s attention to herself like she is feeding off the hungry stares and dirty thoughts birthed by her.
Her eyes meet Harry’s gaze and the sly smirk that tugs on her perfectly shaped lips gives it away that she is not that sorry to be bumping into him.
“No worries,” is all he manages to say, the urge to drop to his knees right then and there stronger than anything he has ever had to fight.
“He won’t notice you,” she tells him and his eyebrows knit together in confusion. “The bartender. If you just stand there like that… he will never come here,” she explains.
“I’m not sure I have what catches his eyes,” he jokes, making her laugh and he swears his stomach drops at the heavenly sound.
“May I?” she arches an eyebrow and Harry nods, letting her step in front of him. He stands tall above her, eyes fixed on her figure as she leans onto the counter, the marble pushing her breasts up just enough to spark the bartender’s fantasies when he glances in her way. She waves at him with a charming smile and a moment later the guy is standing in front of her, ready to please her in any way she desires.
“Three vodka sodas and…” she turns in Harry’s way, her lips slightly parted and his breath hitches in his throat. “What did you want, handsome?”
“Just, uhh—Just two water, please.”
Her eyebrows rise, but she doesn’t comment on it, just adds the two water to her order. The bartender nods and disappears to fix up her drinks. Harry takes a deep breath and sticking his hand out to her he introduces himself.
“I’m Harry, by the way.” She takes his hand, shaking it firmly.
“Y/N. Nice to meet you, Harry. Are you here alone?”
“Um, no. I’m here with a few friends,” he replies nodding towards the back of the place. “Are you here with someone?”
Please don’t say your boyfriend, please!
“A few of my girlfriends,” she smiles, brushing her hair over her shoulder, flaunting a better look at her naked neck and just one glimpse is sending a whirl of dirty thoughts into Harry’s mind. He wonders how soft her skin would feel under his lips, what her moans would sound as he sucks on it, leaving a mark on her, letting every man in the house know that he made her feel good.
“Are you guys celebrating something?” Y/N asks, a knowing smile on her lips as she most definitely saw Harry staring at her.
“Actually, yeah,” he chuckles a little nervously. “It’s my birthday.” Y/N’s eyes brighten up as she beams at him.
“Really? Happy birthday then!”
“Thank you,” he smiles shyly. “Are you guys celebrating something too?”
“Well, I…” she starts, her thoughts wandering off for a second before she continues. “I kind of got promoted,” she explains and Harry smiles down at her warmly.
“Congrats then!”
The bartender returns with the drinks and she is already about to get her card from her little clutch when Harry pulls his card out, handing it over to the guy behind the bar.
“Birthday boys shouldn’t pay for others,” she smirks, but doesn’t try to fight him that hard.
“You can pay me back later,” Harry shrugs with a suggestive smirk on his lips. He doesn’t want to part ways with her, but she is obviously expected to be back with her friends and he needs to get back to Niall as well before he absolutely loses control. Stepping closer to him, Y/N slides a hand up his chest, her palm resting at the base of his neck as she leans to his ear.
“Save me a dance, birthday boy?” she murmurs into his ear, her lips brushing against him for a split second before she steps back, grabs her drinks and winking at him one last time she disappears from the bar. Harry stands there for a few more seconds before the bartender hands him back his card and snatching the waters from the bar he heads back to his friends.
 Luckily, Niall is slowing down a little, The water does him well and Harry finally doesn’t feel like he’ll have to take care of him, dragging him home once the night is over. Sitting by the table Harry is trying to focus on the conversation, but his gaze keeps wandering over to the dance floor, looking for one particular curvy figure in the sea of dancing bodies.
It takes him some time to spot her, but when he does, he is not able to tear his eyes away from her.
She is almost perfectly in the middle with her friends surrounding her, lips and shoulders swaying to the rhythm perfectly. He catches her chug down the last sips of her drink before she disregards the glass and gets back to dancing. Watching her every move intently, Harry feels his lips slightly part at the sight of this angel who is for sure a devil in the sheets. He can’t stop himself fantasizing about what it would feel like to dig his fingers into her thighs, kiss her neck, her cleavage that’s on show now, how her curves would fit into his hands perfectly. He wants to praise this woman, make her feel good and not just because he wants to be selfless and please her, but also because seeing this woman reach her high because of him would be the biggest ego boost for him and he just needs that.
“Go dance with her!” Niall wiggles his eyebrows at him when he catches Harry staring at her.
“What? No, I’m not a dancer,” he shakes his head, shifting his eyes away from the dancing goddess on the dance floor.
“Oh come on, don’t be a pussy!”
“I’m not a pussy, I just—“
“You’re a pussy. I saw her looking in your way as well, she wants your dick!”
“Jesus, Niall!” Harry whines rolling his eyes. He doesn’t like it when he gets so vulgar, but luckily no one heard their conversation. Glancing back in Y/N’s way Harry sees how men are eyeing him, probably building up the courage to go up to her and that has his blood boiling. He needs to be the one to touch her.
Chugging down the rest of his drink he snaps the glass on the table before standing from his seat, ignoring Niall’s cheering as he makes his way into the crowd.
Harry didn’t lie when he said he is not a dancer, he feels uncomfortable, awkward and uncoordinated most of the times he tries to dance, but he is pushing all of those to the back of his mind for now as his eyes are set on one person in the crowd.
When Y/N spots the man approaching her, she can’t push a pleased smile off her lips, slowing her movements down as Harry finally reaches her, leaning closer to her ear so she can hear his voice over the music.
“Here to collect that dance,” he smugly tells her, making her laugh, though the music is too loud to let him hear her. She just nods and turning around she presses herself up against him, her backside fitting his front perfectly. Harry’s hand snake around her waist, his large palm smoothly moving through the silky fabric of her dress as they start moving together.
She is intoxicating, makes Harry feel like he is some kind of horny teenager, like he hasn’t dealt with women before, but in a way, she makes all of his past flings appear to be only girls. Her confidence in her own body is easily one of her best traits, the way she handles herself, moves her body, the look in her eyes, Harry is getting drunk on just watching her and now he is able to touch her as well.
When he feels himself getting hard in his pants, he knows he should be at least a slightly bit embarrassed by himself, but as Y/N turns around in his arms and he sees the pleased smirk on her lips, the feeling vanishes in a heartbeat. She wraps her arms around his neck as she pulls him close, her lips brushing against his lips.
“Enjoying yourself, birthday boy?” she prompts before pressing a kiss to the soft skin under his ear and he can’t hold a growl back. The friction is almost unbearable, as his hands slide lower on her back, stopping on her ass, he knows he won’t be able to control himself any longer. Luckily, he is not the only one having this inner fight.
Snapping around Y/N grabs his hand and starts pulling him through the crowd towards the hallway of the bathrooms. He follows her eagerly, lucky for them, the club doesn’t have restrooms with several stalls, but single bathrooms with a lot more comfort and privacy. Just what they need right now.
They find the third bathroom empty, pushing their way inside and locking the door before Harry pushes her up against it the moment it’s just the two of them, their mouths hungrily meeting in the middle. He almost grunts against her lips, she tastes even better than he imagined and the way her tongue is the first one to come into action has got his mind blown. His hands roam up her body, running up all her curves until they reach her face and he cups it in his palms, pressing his hips against her. She moans against his mouth when his hard cock pokes against her, both of them desperate to take it further.
Tumbling further into the small bathroom, he helps her up to the counter next to the sing, her legs instantly opening for him, her tiny dress rolling up her thighs, revealing her clothed sex. Harry eagerly kisses his way down her neck and chest, her skin feeling so smooth under his lips. His fingers hook under the thin straps of her dress, tugging them down so he can push the dress past her full breasts and thank God she is not wearing a bra underneath!
“Fuck me, you are so hot!” he breathes out, making her chuckle at his reaction.
“That’s what I’m trying to do,” she cockily answers before Harry’s mouth attaches to her nipple, his hand working on her other breasts before he switches.
He quickly gets down on his knees, pushing her underwear to the side before his lips and tongue meet her sensitive clit.
“Oh shit!” she moans, a hand coming to tangle in his hair while she tries to hold herself steady with leaning on the other one behind her. There’s no time for teasing now and they both know that.
She is so lost in the experience, Harry is licking and sucking just the right spots and she tries to close her legs, locking his head between her thighs. His arms come to curl around them, ring clad fingers digging into her flesh and the situation might be a little suffocating for him, but he doesn’t mind it a bit. In fact, if he died this way, he would die a happy man.
She doesn’t let him finish what he started, pulling him up, his lips still glistening from her own juices as she kisses him messily, wiggling herself out of her underwear while he undoes his pants as well.
“Shit, do you have a condom?” he breathes out when his palm wraps around his throbbing cock. She nods, reaching for her clutch she dropped to the counter and digging into it she grabs the package, smacking it against his chest playfully. “Were you planning to do this tonight?” he grins cockily as he rips the package open and starts rolling it down his hard length.
“No, I’m just smart, unlike you,” she retorts, her sass dripping from her tone and it just riles him up even more.
Grabbing her thighs he yanks her to the edge of the counter, a gasp leaving her plump lips as she tries to find her balance quickly.
“Don’t be a brat,” he growl against her lips before kissing her, while he lines himself up with her, the head already pushing in.
“Then fuck me, birthday boy,” she challenges him again and it’s the last straw.
Harry slams into her, both of them moaning at the sensation before he starts thrusting in a fast pace, needing all the friction he can make to get them to finish as soon as possible. Y/N’s head falls back as she holds onto the back of his neck, her other hand on the counter behind her again and Harry glances down, watching her breasts bounce every time he rails into her, slamming his whole length into her every time their hips meet.
She reaches for one of his hands that’s holding her thigh and she boldly brings it to her core, tapping his fingers to her clit, letting him know that she wants some extra effort. Harry doesn’t say it, but he is blown how she didn’t just do it herself, she made him do it. It’s got to be one of the hottest things he has ever seen.
“Fuck, go harder!” she gasps, wrapping her legs around his waist as he picks the pace up, feeling his orgasm building rapidly with each thrust.
They both are a whimpering, moaning mess, the bass of the music is thumping outside and for a moment, Harry feels like he is finally living his life to the fullest.
“I’m gonna cum!” she breathes out, his name falling from her lips moaning after that and when she pulls him down to kiss him, biting into his bottom lip and tugging it, he loses himself.
He feels himself jerking inside her, still sliding in and out of her as he grunts, releasing himself into the condom. He flicks his fingers on her clit at the same time, creating just enough friction to push her over the edge as well. He is coming off his own high when her walls tighten around his cock, dragging his orgasm out even longer as she basically screams, gasping for air, riding her orgasm out to the last bit.
Leaning down he kisses her again though they are still panting, this time making it a lot less rushed than the time their lips met for the first time. Her legs fall from around his waist and he pulls out, both of them cleaning themselves up in the aftermath of their little session.
“I know this was quite rushed and all that, but can I have your number?” he asks, even feeling a little nervous. She puts her underwear back on, smoothing her dress down as she smiles up at him, cupping his face in her palm.
“I’m afraid we’ll have to skip on that,” she tells him simply, shocking him for sure.
“D-Do you have a boyfriend or something?”
“No,” she shakes her head and now Harry is confused.
“You didn’t enjoy it?” he then asks, trying his best to figure out the reason behind the rejection.
“I did. But it was a one time thing. If it’s supposed to turn into more…” she sighs, grabbing her clutch from the counter. “Then I’ll leave it to fate if we ever meet again,” she shrugs before turning around she just unlocks the door and walks out, leaving Harry stand there in complete and utter shock.
This is definitely a first for him, a woman who doesn’t want to see him again. He is not that egoistic to think that everyone is in love with him, but he never had an encounter similar to this. Not after the most amazing sex ever.
Harry fixes himself up, still not believing she walked out that easily, but there’s not much he can do now. Walking back to his table, he acts like nothing happened and when his eyes scan over the crowd again, he can’t see her anymore.
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Harry lets out a tired sigh when Zayn, head of the graphic design department walks into his office with a familiar brown paper bag with the logo of Harry’s favorite Chinese restaurant.
“Has it started already?” Zayn asks, though glancing at the big screen on the wall he can see the stream is still waiting to be started.
“No, I’ve been staring at it for like twenty minutes,” Harry grumbles, pushing himself away from his desk to join Zayn on the couch in front of the screen as he unpacks the food. “What do you think it’s going to be?”
Today is the day of Cometa’s big press conference and no one knows what they are about to announce. It’s been keeping Harry on the edge for the past few days, because whatever it is, it has got to be major. Julia Bianchi is not the type of person to hold press conferences, she is a private person who has managed to keep most of her life behind closed doors. That’s something Harry admires in the woman even though they are competitors in the business. He can relate to wanting to keep her life just for herself, he has been doing the same thing. No public appearances, no lengthy interviews, no photoshoots. He likes to let his work talk for himself and it’s proved to be a successful move so far.
“I don’t know, but I hope they don’t suddenly announce a full graphic makeover right before our update,” Zayn chuckles. He has been working on an entirely new appearance for the website these past weeks and it’s supposed to go live sometime later in the month. A change for Cometa would totally throw their attempt off, making them look like they are just copying Julia’s move.
They eat and wait for the stream to start when the screen finally comes alive. There’s an empty stage shown with just two mic stands in the middle and nothing really happens for a few minutes before clapping is heard from behind the camera and Julia finally walks on the stage.
The woman is a real diva. Wearing a matching pant suit with bold floral print all over it, her short hair is neatly straightened into a bob cut, her red lips smiling lightly as she waves around in the room. Julia has been in the fashion industry for almost three decades now and she surely made a name for herself, sitting front row in every fashion show she attends, her words on any new trend being basically the standard.
Stepping to one of the mics, she clears her throat as the clapping dies down and her calm, gentle voice rings through the speakers.
“Welcome, everyone, thank you for coming, as you might already know I’m Julia Bianchi, head of Cometa, the world’s best online women’s fashion house.”
Harry leans back in his seat, eyes fixed on the woman on the screen as he is patiently waiting to hear what she’s got for the people this time.
“I’ve spent twenty-seven wonderful years in the business, building my own one for the past two decades. I fell in love with fashion as a child and moved to Milan to study designing from the bests. Though designing has always and will always hold a special place in my heart, I saw an opportunity in the early years for a brand that would hold together every other brand in the industry, bringing it to everyone’s home thanks to the rapidly developing technology. Cometa has always been my little baby and I’m proud of everything I achieved as head of such a great company.”
Harry realizes what it’s about before Julia could even say the words herself. The phrasing, the nostalgic tone, it’s all adding up to the obvious: Julia is about to announce her retirement.
“I gave the best years of my life for this company and I regret nothing, but recently I’ve realized that it is time for me to slow down for a little bit and enjoy a life that’s not filled with work anymore, and spend more time with my beloved husband, Fabio and my family who supported me on my long way here. Therefore, I am now announcing it with an aching heart and a lot of excitement as well that I am stepping down from my role as CEO of Cometa. I might be leaving now, but my business will not. So it is a pleasure to introduce you the person who will carry my legacy on, my amazing niece, the absolutely most perfect woman to carry on the work I started, Y/N Y/L/N.”
The moment another woman comes into the picture Harry almost chokes on his own saliva, seeing the same curves he had his fingers dug into last Friday. Y/N smiles and waves around as she steps to the other mic next to her aunt, exchanging a short look with her before turning towards the people in the room and the camera that’s streaming the event.
“Dude, you alright?” Zayn asks, patting Harry’s back a few times as he is still struggling to breathe normally.
He refuses to accept that the woman he fucked in a bathroom on his birthday, the one that made him moan like never before, is the same woman who is going to take over his biggest competitor.
“This has got to be a joke,” he breathes out with teary eyes from all the coughing.
“It is an honor to be here,” Y/N starts speaking as the clapping dies down once again and the two men are staring at the screen. “Just like to be the one to step into the perfectly stylish shoes of my aunt. I hope to live up to not just her and everyone else’s expectations, but also to mine as well. I grew up watching my aunt build up this empire with basically dust so to be the person to take her place is a dream come true. I promise to keep the quality the same and work on improving Cometa to its possible best while being in charge.”
As she finishes talking, questions are thrown in her way, but Harry doesn’t pay attention any longer. Standing up he walks to the window, staring out to the city as he chews on his bottom lip anxiously.
“What the fuck is your problem, H? It wasn’t as bad as we expected, right?” Zayn questions.
“It’s fucking worse!” he snaps turning around. “I can’t believe this is happening to me.”
“Would you just tell me what’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong is that… I told you about what… happened on my birthday.”
“The bathroom fuck, oh yeah,” Zayn chuckles with a playful shine in his eyes.
“Well, that woman… the woman I fucked was her.” Zayn stays silent for a moment before he turns towards the screen, eyeing the woman on the stage as she is still answering questions, standing confidently in her tight, black dress and red heels.
“You fucked Julia Bianchi’s niece? And she is now taking over Cometa?” he raises his eyebrows at Harry who just nods, pressing his lips together into a thin line. “And she is also the one who didn’t give you her number?”
“Don’t… bring that up. But yes, it’s her.”
Zayn starts laughing, clearly finding Harry’s misery entertaining, but Harry doesn’t feel like taking it that easy. He wonders if she knew who he was, if she did it on purpose or it was fate’s horrible joke on both of them.
“Ah man, that charity event on Saturday will be one hell of a show then!” Zayn points it out and Harry’s face falls. He totally forgot about the charity event he was invited to, one that would have the biggest names in the fashion industry together in a ball room to raise money for a chosen good cause. It happens every year and it’s a major event, the perfect place to network and also to see your biggest enemies. That means that Harry will see Y/N again in a few short days and if he is being honest… he is not ready to face her, not after the information he learned today. Sighing he steps to the minibar he insisted on having in his office and though he never drinks during the day, he now thinks that now might be an exception. He pours himself some whiskey and before he chugs it down at one go, he lets out a long, tired sigh.
“That’s just my luck…”
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Leslie helps you with the zipper of your dress, the silky, red fabric hugging your body like a second skin. She smoothes the wrinkles out while you fix the straps, staring back at yourself in the mirror with judgment. You need to look perfect, this is going to be your first time appearing at an event as CEO of Cometa, your big entrance into the industry, you can’t let anything go wrong.
“You look gorgeous, babe,” Leslie smiles at you, bringing your hair behind your shoulders as her eyes meet yours in the mirror. Leslie might be your assistant, but she is a lot more than that. You’ve been friends for almost a decade and when she lost her job a few years ago you didn’t hesitate to offer her a spot next to you. You wouldn’t be here without her, she doesn’t try to use her privilege of being your friend to not do the work, she is always on top of her game and you’ll always be grateful for her to not make it awkward at all.
“I think you need some diamonds though,” she winks at you, stepping to the table where all kinds of jewelry is sprawled out. She reaches for a simple one, not too much, quite elegant and you nod as she holds it up for you. Walking behind you she brings it around your neck, the diamond brilliantly sitting on your chest now, giving that little extra shine to your outfit.
“You’ll make every man fall in love with you,” she smiles at you and breathing out you nod, hoping to believe that everything will go perfectly.
While you make a few last minute calls she gets dressed as well before the car arrives for the two of you. She is wearing a less daring but still beautiful black dress, her curly hair pinned up into a loose bun at the nape of her neck, her heavily freckled face bright from her happy smile as the two of you make your way to the event.
“I know it’s ridiculous, but I tried to memorize the faces and names from the guest list,” she grins at you, earning an eyeroll.
“Les, I told you, this is not The Devil Wears Prada,” you chuckle softly. She is obsessed with that movie and hasn’t shut up about feeling like she is literally living in it since your aunt has shared her plans with you about your future position last year.
“I know, but it might be impressive if you already knew everyone!”
You have to give that to her, it would earn you a few good points if you knew the names already, you’re just still nervous about the whole thing. So many things could go wrong and you want it to be perfect.
 At first you feel intimidated by all the influential people around you. Everyone here is one of the bests in their own field and you feel like an impostor, but then you remind yourself that you earned your spot. Your aunt wouldn’t have given you the company if she didn’t trust you entirely with it. You worth no less than anyone else in this ball room and that reminds you that… you’re that bitch.
Leslie’s knowledge of names actually comes handy. You love seeing people get shocked when they try to introduce themselves to you, but you already greet them saying their names. It earns you some appreciative looks as you make your way around the room. Everything is going smooth, right until you spot one particular man in the crowd.
You’re in a little circle with a few designers when your gaze falls on Harry who is standing across the room, talking to two men. The champagne almost slips from your hand when you realize it’s him.
“Leslie,” you grab her wrist catching her attention. “Les, who’s the man in the blue Gucci suit?” you ask in a whisper and she follows your gaze, finding the man in talk.
“Oh, that’s Harry Styles, head of Twisted.”
“Fuck,” you mumble under your breath as you quickly excuse yourself from the conversation and head out to the balcony to get some fresh air before you faint right on the spot.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Leslie follows you.
“I messed up,” you squeak as you step outside, the chilly evening air hitting your uncovered skin immediately. “I messed up big time!”
“What? Why? What happened?”
Stepping to the edge, you wrap your hands around the railing, staring out into the void for a moment. Leslie Stands beside you, quite puzzled about your sudden panic.
“Remember the guy I told you about from Friday night?” you ask, keeping your voice down even though there’s no one really around. Leslie nods. “Well… he was the guy.”
Leslie glances back inside and then at you before her eyes widen and lips part in shock.
“You fucked Harry Styles at a club’s bathroom?!” she whisper-yells at you and you feel like a teenager who is getting scolded.
“I didn’t know who he was! And I genuinely think he didn’t know me either, how could he?! But now he is here and… Oh God, this is so bad,” you whine, your head dropping backwards as you let out a frustrated growl.
“Okay, don’t panic. Maybe… maybe he doesn’t remember you.”
“You can’t make me believe he doesn’t remember me after fucking me on a counter,” you tell her giving her a look.
“Alright, alright. Then… you just have to suck it up. It’s not like you can unfuck him,” she shrugs and though you know she is right, you just wish you could leave right now.
You never planned on seeing him again. Your bullshit speech about letting fate decide it was just an excuse to not give him your number. You didn’t want to because you thought he is not the kind of man that would be good for you. From his look you thought that he was either a fuckboy, not willing to commit to anything serious, or the kind of man that seems all nice and respectful at first but then turns out to be a total asshole and you’ve had enough of those in your twenty-eight years.
Soon enough you head back as the auction is about to start. Luckily, your seat is far away from Harry and it seems like he hasn’t noticed you yet. Though you wish to keep it that way, you can feel it coming already.
The auction goes by fast, you buy a new painting that will look amazing in your living room and almost twice as much money is raised through the evening that was the goal. You leave Leslie behind at the table as you go to the bar to get yourself another drink, probably your last one of the evening if you don’t want to end up making a fool out of yourself.
Patiently waiting at the bar you’re already thinking about watching Grey’s Anatomy when you get back and out of this tight dress. You look hot, but it’s not the comfiest look, if you’re being honest. There’s only one more person in front of you when you feel a little tap on your shoulder and turning around your stomach drops when you see the man you’ve been trying to avoid all evening.
“Fancy seeing you here, Y/N,” he nods shortly, his expression is quite blank, but he is definitely not shocked to see you. You tighten your jaw before looking away from him, squinting your eyes a bit.
“You don’t seem surprised,” you point out.
“I was kind of expecting to see you here tonight.”
“So you knew who I was all along?” you snap at him, but he shakes his head.
“Not until the stream this week. I was pretty shocked when you walked on stage.”
Nodding shortly you brush your hair over your shoulder and you catch Harry glimpsing down your body, but decide not to comment on it.
“Did you know who I was?” he then asks, digging his hands into his pockets.
“No, I wouldn’t sleep with my biggest competitor willingly.”
“Just from the abrupt ending I had a feeling that you might have known me.”
“Just because a woman doesn’t throws herself into your arms after a fuck, doesn’t mean she had ulterior motives,” you scoff. “Get off your high horse,” you add before turning back towards the bar so you can order your drink. Unfortunately, Harry doesn’t want the conversation to end just yet. His hand is laid flat on the counter in front of you as he stands on your right, a little too close to your liking. You can smell the expensive cologne on him, the same that hit your nose on Friday as well and suddenly your body is betraying you.
However crazy the situation is, you can’t deny that he gave you one of the best times last Friday. Men you dealt with were more concerned about their own pleasure and most of them didn’t even get you to finish. But Harry made it happen so fast and didn’t even bitch about it when you made him rub your clit. He just obeyed like a grownup man who is willingly take care of his partner. That almost made you change your mind about leaving, but once you came down from cloud nine, you returned to your original plan.
But not as he is standing in front of you and you can smell him, your senses trick you into thinking that you’re in that bathroom again, almost aching for him to touch you the way he did then. He leans closer to your ear as he speaks up again.
“Leave the drink, dance with me,” he tells you as the bartender places your drink in front of you. You debate what to do before grabbing the drink and chugging it down in one go. You’ll need the alcohol if you are about to dance with your enemy.
Harry takes you to the dance floor in the middle of the ball room, one of his hands finds the small of your back while the other takes your hand as the two of you start swaying to the gentle music played by the band.
“Your aunt set my company back in women’s fashion every time I tried to take a step forward. Are you going to do the same?”
“She didn’t do anything to set you back but to build her own company. Not everything is about you.”
“You sound a little naïve, Love. It’s pretty clear you are new in the business.” This statement riles you up big time. How dare he degrade you like that? He knows nothing about you, yet he assumes things that are not at all real.
Smirking to yourself you lean back enough so your gazes can meet. Your hand slides up from his shoulders to the base of his neck so your fingers can gently brush against his skin and you notice the shudder than runs down his spine. He is not the only one having flashbacks from your last encounter.
“Wanna know what I know about business?” you purr, his eyes glued to your red lips as you speak. “I know that… Twisted was one of the last sites to participate in personalized ads on online platforms, failing to reach it’s targeted audience as fast as literally everyone else. I know that your company and my company use the same security system in our server rooms yet I can assure you that it cost me twenty percent less because we waited a month before installing it and got a huge last minute discount because the security company was trying to boost their numbers for their end of year closing. And I also happen to know that you are working on a new design for your website that could easily be outshone if I just did the same before you could do it.”
Harry’s lips part, probably mostly at the last information. He has no idea how you know these stuff, but you have a wide circle of connections in the city, you have an insider at every big companies in the industry without them even knowing. You’ve given countless tips to your aunt through the years, that’s how she managed to stay on top of her games.
Leaning closer your lips almost brush against him and you see how he weakens, he is expecting you to kiss him and he wants it. But you just smile at him, your eyes snapping down to his lips before up to his eyes.
“I will not do the same as my aunt, Harry,” you softly speak, your fingers grazing the back of his neck. “I will do way worse things.”
And with that, you slip out of his arms and walk back to your table, leaving him standing there alone at a complete loss of words.
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“What the fuck had gotten into you?” Niall grimaces upon hearing everything he told you on the evening of the charity event. And quite frankly, Harry has no answer to that. He has absolutely no idea what had gotten into him to act like such a dick when you didn’t do anything against him.
The situation just messed with his head, seeing you in that breathtaking dress, mingling with everyone, smiling and laughing, oh how he wished you were laughing on his jokes! But then you seemed so tensed when he came up to you and something just switched in him. He wanted to take dominance, to somehow get out of it on top, but he miserably failed. When you brought up their plans to change the design he completely froze.
“No idea, okay? I just…lost it,” he growls, sinking into the couch. When Niall found out that Harry met the woman from the club again he insisted on coming over with some wine to talk it out, but he was not expecting this kind of story at all.
“Dude, you just put yourself on her radar big time, maybe she wouldn’t have even bothered to compete with you like her aunt did, but you surely changed her mind now.”
“I know, Niall!” Harry growls, not in the mood to be scolded like a little child. “Do you think she’ll change their design before we do?” he peeks at his friend, but Niall just shrugs.
“No idea, but I would try to speed it up before she actually does it.”
 Harry made you into a ticking bomb and you successfully got under his skin about the whole design project so first thing the next morning he went to Zayn to discuss a possible earlier debut for the new designs. Though it would be a close stretch, they agreed that it would go live by the end of the week and that got Harry somehow a little relieved, but in the middle of that he failed to put the right amount of effort into finding designers for their female lines.
When he meets up with Lambert a few days later he is not there to deliver great news. Apparently, three out of the four designers they were negotiating with recently pulled out of their deal and signed a contract with Cometa.
“We have one last designer on the list, but then… we are out of the bigger names,” Lambert sighs as Harry chews on his bottom lip anxiously. He feels like he has fallen into a hole a while ago and instead of climbing out he is just digging it deeper underneath him.
“Okay, do we have an appointment with them?” Harry asks.
“Yeah, I’m meeting her this afternoon.”
“I’m going with you,” he nods before standing from his chair and opening the door he calls out for his assistant. “Rebecca, please clear my schedule for this afternoon, I’ll be out of the office.”
Rebecca nods behind her desk, already starting to make calls about Harry’s meetings and appointments.
It’s obvious he is anxious about the meeting, because if it falls through they are forced to look for less known designers and that won’t bring the change for the company they’ve been seeking for a long time. Arriving to the showroom where the designer is working, Harry is setting his thoughts straight, determined to convince her to sign a contract with them. The two men are let into the building by the nice assistant working at the front desk and she shows the way to the showroom where Kennedy, the designer is waiting for them.
Harry is confident, he trusts his skills to make this happen, but when they walk inside he instantly freezes upon seeing an all too familiar figure standing with Kennedy
A maroon colored pantsuit is hugging your curves, a Hermés handbag hanging from your arm, your hair falling in loose curls. As if you could sense his presence, you peek over your shoulder, a devilish smirk on your lips when you see the shocked expression on Harry’s face.
“What a great surprise!” you beam, selling how happy you are to see him and in a way, you are. You wanted to see his face drop when he realizes you snatched yet another designer from him.
“Oh, Mr. Styles!” Kennedy smiles nicely at him and he finally snaps out of his trance, shaking hands with her and then turning to you, doing the same but in a lot colder manner.
“Y/N, nice to see you again,” he fakes a smile as your hand falls from his palm.
“I could say the same. But I’m heading out now. Great talk, Kennedy. I’ll be waiting for your call,” you wink at the young designer who seems to be thrilled by your words as she walks you to the exit.
“Fucking hell,” Harry mumbles under his breath and Lambert shoots him a look before Kennedy returns.
The three of them take a seat on the couches in the corner of the room and Harry is quick to get down to business, trying his best to make his offer appear more appealing than anything you told her right before their arrival. Kennedy listens intently, even takes notes and then she shows him some examples of what she was thinking about for her next line and Harry is beyond thrilled.
Unfortunately, soon comes the painful part.
“Harry, I’m gonna be honest with you,” Kennedy starts and Harry already knows what she is about to say. “Your offer is very tempting and it would be an honor to design a line for Twisted, but in my situation it would be more beneficial if I collaborated with Cometa. It is nothing against your company, it’s more about my personal path and growth.”
Harry can feel his stomach dropping and he clenches his jaw as he listens to Kennedy’s worth. He understands, of course he understands, she has the right to selfishly look at her own benefits upon signing with a new company, but he wished she would take the risk and chose his company instead of yours.
“I’m keeping the offer open for you still,” he forces a smile on his face. “If you change your mind, Twisted would be more than happy to work with you.”
Kennedy walks the two men out and the fake smile quickly vanishes from Harry’s face upon stepping out of the building.
“What are we going to do now?” Lambert asks, clearly worried about how they’re gonna move forward with their last chance falling.
“If Y/N wants a war, that’s what she’ll get,” Harry growls, revenge burning in the greens of his eyes.
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It’s a quiet Friday afternoon, only hours left from the day before you are headed home finally. You’re sitting in your office with Leslie, going over next week’s schedule to make sure everything is set and clear.
It’s been almost an entire month since you stepped into your aunt’s shoes as head of the company and though the start was a little rough, especially with finding out who Harry was, but you feel like you have everything under your control by now. After all, you didn’t learn business for years from the bests for nothing, right?
Harry’s comment on you knowing nothing about the industry made you bitter, because he knows nothing about you and the struggle you went through your life to get to this point. It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbow, being Julia’s niece might have been a hugely influencing aspect of you taking over, but you worked your ass off to be the best leader you can and not just ruin everything she built up through her whole life.
Though you didn’t always want to be the one following her, but you like to think that things worked out to your favor and you are where you should be.
“Alright, everything is looking fine,” Leslie smiles at you over her laptop. “I’ll send you the notes from today’s meeting.”
“Thank you. Can you call in with the delivery company about next month’s transactions?” you ask her and she nods, already adding it to her list of tasks for the rest of the day. “Alright. I’ll do the rest of the signings and then we can head out,” you smile at her.
Leslie is grabbing her things from the table when there’s a soft knock on the door. You give your permission and one of the tech support guys walk in with a worried look on his face.
“Miss Y/L/N? I’m afraid we have a problem,” he clears his throat and you can already feel your anxiety crawl up on your spine.
“What is it?” you ask firmly. The guy steps farther inside, fumbling with his fingers as he presents the issue.
“There’s been an attempt to break our software’s security system where we keep our data about the sellings. A-And I’m afraid it wasn’t just an attempt, they succeeded.”
You take a deep breath, glancing over at Leslie for a moment before you follow the man to the tech department to investigate the issue further. You don’t know shit about these stuff, but from what he said you know the trouble is huge and if you don’t solve it as soon as possible, valuable data could leak out to the public. They try to explain you what they are working on as of right now and that there’s not much you can actually help with.
“Make sure to put your extra hours on your attendance sheets and let me know when you are able to restore the system,” you tell them and you earn quite a few thank yous on your way out for actually paying the overtime. Then you turn to the guy that first came to your office. “Do you have any information about who it could have been?”
“We weren’t able to track them back, but whoever it was, they’re surely professionals and they might know the system from the inside.”
“What do you mean from the inside? Someone did it from the company?” you ask, eyebrows knitting together as you fold your arms on your chest.
“No,” he shakes his head. “We would have been able to track that back. I mean that they know the system, maybe they worked somewhere where the same one was used and they could see into it.”
It takes you a few moments before you realize what this really is and it has your blood boiling right away. Nodding shortly you exhale sharply through your nose.
“Thank you, please call me when it’s up and running again, I’ll take care of the rest,” you tell him before turning around you walk away.
When Leslie sees you approaching your office with a head practically turning red she is quick to jump to her feet, following you into the office.
“What’s happening?”
“Harry Styles, that’s what happening,” you snap as you grab your phone, purse and coat before heading out, not wasting another minute.
“What? Where are you going now?”
“To the devil himself,” you growl back and enter the elevator, leaving her alone with her questions.
Sitting in your car on your way to the headquarters of Twisted, you imagine every scenario you want to make happen when you arrive, most of them including hitting the man across his ridiculously handsome yet annoying face. He crossed a line with breaking into your system and stealing valuable data. Though you’re sure he wouldn’t dare to sell or publish it, because he would be in a big legal trouble if he did, he still had a glimpse into your numbers and that’s already an advantage. He is playing dirty and you’re not having any of it.
Arriving you burst through the doors and demand to see him. Though the woman behind the front desk tells you that you can’t see him without an appointment, you still get her to make a call up and naturally, Harry allows you to see him. The fucker might already have been waiting for you to show up. As you stand in the all glass elevator, on your way up to meet him you take a few deep breaths to keep your cool and not snap like a maniac, however it all vanishes when you see him waiting for you with that shit-eating grin on his face when you step out of the elevator.
“You’re lucky I didn’t go straight to the police with your little stunt, you fucker!” you snap, not able to hold back your swearing any longer.
“Do you have any evidence?” he tilts his head to the side and you don’t miss how his gaze runs down your body as you march towards him. You’d find it flattering in another situation, but right now you just want to punch him in the face.
“I’ll show some evidence down your throat, Styles, if you don’t stop messing with my security system,” you growl back, standing so close to him now that you see every tiny freckle and blemish on his face and the way how he clenches his jaw, holding his gaze on yours.
Without a word or invitation, you walk into the room that you suppose is his office and he follows with a soft chuckle.
“Did you hire a hacker just to mess with me?” you throw the question at him as he closes the door so his employees don’t hear everything.
“What if I did?” he shrugs, stepping to the tray on his desk that already has a glass of whiskey on it. He grabs the glass and simply lifts it to his lips, taking a tiny sip from it. “Oh, excuse my manners. Would you like a drink?”
“I’m driving,” you answer shortly. “You crossed a line, Harry,” you warn him.
“What line?” he chuckles, rather entertained by your rage. “After what you pulled with Kennedy, I think I went easy on you.”
“I didn’t pull anything, I just gave her a better offer! It’s not my fault she has better chances with my company!” you snap back, feeling your heartbeat fastening from the anger that’s boiling in your veins.
“You knew I wanted her to design for me, why couldn’t you just let one person out of your endless list? You already have everyone else, she was my last fucking chance!” Harry barks back, clearly having some built up tension in him as well.
“If you didn’t act like an arrogant asshole at the charity gala, I would have happily let you work with her, but then you felt the need to fucking degrade me! That’s why I didn’t let you get away with it!”
Harry opens his mouth to answer, but he quickly closes his mouth, probably knowing well you’re right. He did act shitty towards you that evening and he has no excuse for his behavior. You walk closer until there are just a few feet between the two of you, your eyes glued to his burning green gaze that’s staring back at you, but before you could speak up, he cuts you off.
“Well, you know. All is fair in… war and business,” he shrugs and you honestly barely can stop yourself from laughing at how stupid that just sounded. You can’t miss the twitch in the corner of his mouth as well and you can’t believe how easily he made you break out of your rage.
“Don’t try to make money out of writing slogans,” you huff shaking your head and now he is grinning widely. “Do you have the data?”
“I don’t,” he answers and you narrow your eyes at him.
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not,” he chuckles. “I had it, but I already deleted it. I know it wasn’t ethical so as soon as it was handed to me I deleted it. I didn’t even look into it. I just wanted to scare you.”
“And how do I know your hacker doesn’t have it either?”
“Because he signed a contract that would cost him millions to break and I don’t think a junior in college who is still living in a dorm can afford that,” he points out and now you are somewhat convinced. You stare back at him for a few more seconds before nodding.
“Stay out of my way and I’ll stay out of yours, how does that sound?” you offer generously.
“Where’s the fun in that?” he questions with a smug smirk that makes your arch an eyebrow at him. “What are you doing tomorrow evening?” he then asks and you can’t mask your surprise in front of him.
“That does not concern you, Styles,” you scoff, though it boosts your ego that even through all the hate you’ve been targeting at each other, he still wants you the same way he did at the club that evening. You can’t deny, this rivalry has sparked a few thoughts in you as well, but you are not going to fall into the same mistake you made that evening. You pay him another smirk before turning around and heading towards the door. “Stay out of my way, Styles!” you call back without looking at him, but you just know he is grinning at you, a growing sexual tension thickening the atmosphere in the room.
“Or what?” he smugly questions and you stop at the door, glancing back at him over your shoulder.
“Or… You said it yourself. All is fair in war and business,” you smirk before walking out of the office.
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Following your visit to Harry’s office things take a… playful turn in your rivalry. The attempts and competing don’t stop, both of you are on each other’s radar, ruining and messing with each other’s projects and works whenever and wherever it’s possible, but it’s not as hateful as it was at the beginning. If something, it even helps you to always be on your toes and watch out for possible threats, not just from Harry but from everyone else.
Neither of you succeeds in evolving in each other’s field, Cometa keeps thriving in women’s fashion with a quite small variety offered for the gentlemen while Twisted fails to grow out of men’s fashion and venture to the ladies, but somehow it’s not as frustrating as it used to be before.
Harry keeps up his flirty acts and tries to ask you out every time your paths cross each other, but you relentlessly turn him down every time, only fueling him to keep chasing after you more the next time. It’s a thrilling and flattering little game, knowing that even with all the rivalry between the two of you, being the biggest competitors in the business… he still wants you.
New York fashion week rolls around and it’s by far one of your favorite times in the year. You managed to snatch an exclusive deal with YSL to release a special line just for the fashion week and it sold out in the first two hours, now waiting to be restocked in a few days. Cometa is thriving and your aunt has expressed her pride towards the work you’ve been doing at the company, so things are heading the right direction.
You knew Harry would be attending the same shows as you, but it’s fate or just luck that you are seated next to each other at one of the shows, giving you the chance to talk without any of you attempting to corrupt the other this time.
Harry is already sitting in his seat when you arrive wearing a custom made Gucci dress, something that immediately catches his eyes since he is a huge fan of the brand himself.
“Your fashion sense never disappoints, Y/N,” he beams up at you as you take the seat next to him.
“Hope that’s not surprising, Styles,” You smirk at him, taking a glance at his own Gucci outfit, the checkered pants fitting him perfectly while the pussy bow adds some spice to the whole outfit, you have to admit. He looks good, he always does.
“Any plans after the show?” he asks right before the lights go out and the show starts. You leave him without an answer, just let out a soft chuckle as you glue your eyes to the first model who walks the runway.
Once the show is over you head out with Harry by your side, having an actually entertaining discussion about the designs you just saw. He might not be an expert in fashion, but he has developed a good sense through his years.
As you make your way out of the venue you are stopped by an interviewer and Harry remains on your side as the woman asks you a few questions about the show.
“I’ve always wondered, does it bother you that you couldn’t be on the runway yourself? You’ve been sitting front row the past years, but you once had aspirations of being a model yourself, is that right?”
The question makes you tense up and you can feel Harry’s puzzled look on you from the side.
“It’s not like it was my fault for not making it up there,” you sass back, forcing a smile to your face.
“Well, that’s not entirely true,” the woman chuckles and it has your blood boiling, because you know the real meaning behind her words.
It’s your fault you didn’t become a model because you were never thin enough to be one. It was your fault and not the industry’s to hold impossible standards to women who wanted to succeed as a model.
The smile falters from your face and you take a long, judgmental look at the woman in front of you. Because if she is brave enough to talk like that to you, you’re not gonna shy away from bringing her spirits down either.
“Judging from your appearance and attitude you wouldn’t make it either,” you spitefully reply and her smile quickly fades, clearly shocked at your answer. You open your mouth again, ready to continue, but then you feel a hand on the small of your back and you realize Harry is still standing next to you.
“Come on, we have somewhere to be, right?” he smiles kindly as you just simply nod and walk away from the woman before she could offend you again.
Harry senses your tension as the two of you leave the venue but doesn’t try to talk to you and that’s a wise choice from him. As you step out of the building you realize that if you went home now you’d probably get drunk on your own and let that comment get to you more than you should. So instead of doing that you turn to Harry.
“So, what are our plans?” you ask and you don’t miss the small smile on his lips as he stares back at you.
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Not in the mood to stay around people at a bar you accept Harry’s invitation to his place, since it’s also close. The contrast between his extravagant penthouse and your cozy but still quite modern townhouse in Park Slope is major, but you didn’t expect anything less from the man.
You’ve managed to calm down since you left the venue, but you’re still quite bitter about the comment the woman made. Harry hasn’t tried to ask you about it, but you can tell he is dying to know more about the situation that’s behind the madness.
He fixes you a drink and you find yourself sinking into his comfortable and probably ridiculously expensive couch in his living room area.
“I used to want to be a model,” you start, breaking the silence that settled between the two of you. “When I was a teen. I was a lot thinner, I was a competitive dancer until I was seventeen, but I had a knee injury, so I had to quit.”
Harry sits on the other end of the couch, listening to you with patience as he sips on his own drink.
“I was never as thin as the other models at the agency I was trying to get into, but I definitely wasn’t overweight. Yet, they labelled me as a plus size model. I was a healthy, strong young girl with a perfectly good body, yet they told me that I was too fat to be a model.”
Glancing at Harry, you can tell that he is surprised at the information he just learned. He is probably picturing you thinner now, going to model castings and if you’re being honest you enjoyed that part. The trouble came when you got rejection after rejection, telling you to lose weight and come back after that.
“I quit my whole plan to be a model and studied fashion and business instead, consciously working my way towards this point. But I never got over how the industry made me feel less of a person because I wasn’t a size zero.”
For a few long moments Harry just stares at you and it’s actually nice that he doesn’t try to make you feel better right away, praising you how you are perfect just the way you are. Because you’re not, but that’s fine because no one is.
“I’ve honestly never seen a more cruel industry than fashion before,” he then speaks up. “I didn’t grow up in it and still don’t really have that much and deep connection with it, but I know how fucked up it is. And it’s nice to see that you know your worth even after everything that happened.”
Your gaze meets his and you’re looking for any sign that gives away that he is just messing with you, but it’s all genuine. You just shoot him a small smile before lifting your drink to your lips. It’s the most intimate moment you’ve shared with him, including the ones you had in that bathroom.
“Okay, now you tell me something about your life,” you prompt, wanting to divert the conversation on him a little bit.
“What do you want to know?” he asks with a soft chuckle.
“Why did you name your brand Twisted?” you ask. The question has been on your mind for a while.
“It’s coming from my mum’s name. Anne Twist.”
Your eyebrows shoot up, you weren’t expecting such a deep and personal reason behind the name, connected to a family member.
“Why her?”
“Why not?” he smirks shrugging his shoulders. “She raised me and my sister up, I wouldn’t be here without her. It was obvious I would make her be part of it in some kind of way.”
“That’s actually very nice. Who knew that you could be something other than an egoistic asshole!” you joke, making him laugh as well.
“Okay, what’s the meaning behind your brand?” he then turns it back around.
“Well, my aunt met her husband when they were very young, maybe eighteen. She fell in love with Fabio on her trip to Italy and being the impulsive and adventurous woman that she is, she stayed for a month there just because of Fabio. He is a very passionate man and he was always ready to bring the stars down for Julia. He always used to tell her that he would even catch a comet for her, if that’s what she wanted. And that was my aunt’s favorite saying from him. Cometa is comet in Italian. It’s her tribute to the love of her life.”
“That’s easily the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard,” Harry hums and you just smile nodding at him. It really is like a fairytale and it’s also one of the reasons why you were so happy to take her place at Cometa. Julia is still just as in love with Fabio as she was at eighteen and she deserves to spend more time with her beloved husband. She earned the time off after all the sacrifices she made for the company and all through them Fabio stayed by her side. It’s their well-earned happy ending now.
“You know a lot about romantic things?” you cock an eyebrow at him, finishing up your drink.
“Actually, I’m a quite romantic guy.”
“Are you now?”
“Yeah, you just never gave me the chance to show it to you.”
“Oh, so now I’m the bad guy?” you chuckle, handing him your glass when he stands from the couch to get you a refill.
“Exactly!” he chuckles holding up your empty glass on his way. “I hope you know you absolutely broke my heart when you didn’t give me your number that night.”
“Oh, you poor little thing,” you chuckle, resting your head in your palm, your elbow on the back of the couch. “I’m not sorry though. You didn’t give out the right vibes.”
“The right vibes?” he huffs as he returns with your drink and now sits a little closer to you. “What vibe did I give you?” “The vibe that told me I shouldn’t mess with you,” you simply answer as you take a sip from your refilled drink.
“You were so keen on hating me even before you knew who I was, I can’t believe you,” he chuckles shaking his head.
“I’m just cautious!” you protest. “I’ve dealt with some problematic men in the past, I can’t let myself walk right into another one that easily.”
“What did they do?”
“Some men just can’t treat women right. Especially confident ones with a body like mine,” you simply shrug.
Men like to think that bigger girls are so terribly insecure about their body that they need the validation of a male to feel good about themselves. But when you’re confident and feel good in your own skin without needing them to praise you, they think that you’re egoistic, so full of yourself and they are quick to try to drag you down. That’s something you can’t tolerate. You don’t need a man to feel good about yourself, you don’t need anyone for that. You know your worth and that’s all that matters.
Harry’s eyes travel down your body, taking his time on your curves and you smile shaking your head as you reach out and cupping his chin you pull his head up so he is looking into your eyes.
“I honestly can’t see what problem anyone could have with your body. I haven’t stopped thinking about it since our bathroom fiasco,” he bluntly comments making you chuckle, even flattered by his words.
“You are such a flirt,” you grin at him and he doesn’t try to protest.
You stay for a couple more drinks and you drop the heavier topics, venturing over to music, fashion and any funny stories that come to your mind. Harry is actually amazing company when you’re not trying to jump at each other’s throat and for a few short hours you forget that he is supposed to be your competitor.
You’re a little tipsy, but you are definitely not drunk, so when Harry offers you to stay the night you turn it down, calling yourself a car since you are not in the right state to drive.
“I’ll come and pick my car up in the morning,” you breathe out as you put your heels back on that came off your feet sometime during the evening, making yourself home in his place.
“I’ll text you the security number to the garage,” he nods, walking you to the elevator.
“Thank you. And… I guess thank you for the evening,” you smile at him, turning to face him. He is standing close, but still takes a step closer, one of his hands finding your waist as he pulls you against his chest. Your palms lie flat on his chest as you try to get yourself to the right mindset to leave now before you regret doing something. Leaning down his nose nudges against your cheek, before he presses a soft kiss under below your ear, a sigh escaping your lips.
“I should go, the car is here,” you breathe out, but don’t move.
“Mm, okay,” he hums, his lips peppering kisses on your jaw and your cheek, as if you didn’t say a word. You want to continue it, not just because of the alcohol but because the sexual tension between the two of you has been growing since that charity gala, but the remainder of your rationality stops you before your lips could meet.
“Bye Harry,” you smile at him softly as you push him away and you walk into the elevator, leaving him hanging. Again.
“Bye Y/N. I’m still going to try to ruin your company!” he calls after you as you turn around to face him, the sliding doors slowly closing between the two of you.
“Same back at you, Styles,” you smirk before the door closes and you are taken down.
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Well, that was a lie. Following your evening at his place neither of you really tries to work against the other, leaving each other be without any fuss. It might also have something to do with how you kept in touch after that day. You’ve been texting occasionally, attending some events together, even had a business dinner together with a few other peers from the industry. Things have been quiet and you’ve been feeling content with the current state you’ve managed to reach. Or so you thought.
It was a silent agreement between the two of you. You both put your projects aside that targeted the other’s profile. Harry stopped looking for designers for his women lines and you put your men department to the side as well. There were a lot to work on beside these fields so you felt like you were in peace. Right until Leslie bursts into your office on a casual Tuesday.
“Have you seen this?” she asks, placing a tablet in front of you with an Instagram account open on it.
You want to ask what you’re supposed to look at, but then you realize what it really is. A shiny new account for a new brand that promises to take online shopping to the next level; female and male as well.
“You think it could be…?” you ask, not quite convinced that Harry is behind this.
“Well, the wording is similar to theirs and creating a new brand might be a solution to their gap in women’s fashion,” she points it out, though you don’t want to believe he could have been working on this all along, basically in front of your face.
But it’s a possibility and you have to consider this option before jumping into defending him without any proof.
“Men can’t be trusted,” you grumble under your breath before jumping into work.
What you didn’t know is that an eerily similar situation goes down in Harry’s office as well when Zayn bursts in, showing him the ad he found for the new brand called Farfalla.
Harry immediately digs up everything about the company, though there’s not much other than their new Instagram account and heavy marketing that started just yesterday.
“What is Farfalla even?” he grimaces leaning back in his chair.
“It means butterfly in Italian,” Zayn explains and Harry’s eyes flicker up to him.
“Italian? You think it’s her?”
“It’s possible,” Zayn nods. “Starting a new brand to finally reach men’s fashion is a good idea.”
“She wouldn’t have done this,” Harry shakes his head in disbelief. Could you be working on this all along? Was this your plan from the start? To make him fall for you and forget about business while you built up your new empire to ruin him?
“What if she did?” Zayn prompts and in a way his suspicion is valid, but Harry is having a hard time believing it. You would never play him this dirty, not after how the two of you have grown closer in the past weeks, almost became friends.
“What are you going to do?” Zayn asks him as he pushes himself away from the desk and quite obviously starts getting ready to leave.
“She is not getting away from this,” Harry mumbles under his breath as he grabs his coat and phone before storming out of the office.
It’s past six when Harry gets to Cometa’s building and he is informed that you’ve already went home. He could have just come back in the morning, but he knew he would just stew in his own anger if he didn’t talk to you as soon as possible. So using his charm he gets the woman sitting behind the front desk to share your address with him, saying that he needs to talk to you urgently. That’s how he finds himself heading to Park Slope, slightly surprised you are not living somewhere in the heart of Manhattan.
As the scenery around his changes, skyscrapers turning into brick buildings and townhouses, Harry tries to figure out what he even wants to say to you. Should he just get straight down to business and accuse you? Snap at you? Or should he give you the chance to explain yourself? He can’t really make up his mind, mostly because he still feels like you betrayed him even though he can’t be sure Farfalla is yours.
Parking down at the address he got from the woman, he stares up at the deep red brick townhouse, a simple, black door at the top of the stairs that’s lined with a few potted plants and flowers. This is not what he would have imagined your home like, but now that he is standing on your doormat, he realizes it kind of suits you.
Ringing the bell he hopes that you’re home and not out and about somewhere in the city, but when he hears the familiar sound of heels clicking on the floor he knows you are on the other side. When the front door flings open and you come into his sight, for a split second he forgets why he is here and his anger vanishes. As always, you look amazing, a tight, black dress hugging your curves, the middle part appearing like it’s a corset, emphasizing the dip of your waist. Your hair is let down in loose curls and your feet are bare, but he knows you probably wore heels all day. You must have gotten home not long ago and as your eyes fall on the man at the door, your expression hardens on him.
“You really had the balls to come her, huh?” you cock your head to the side, keeping your eyes on his green ones for a moment before you let him inside.
“Did you think you could get away with it?” he huffs walking into the hallway and stopping as you close the door and turn to him.
“Me? I could say the same! You thought I would just ignore it or what? I proved you a few times that I’m not stupid, Harry,” you retort, folding your arms on your chest as you walk past him, into the kitchen and he follows.
“You surely are not stupid, playing me so dirty behind my back!” Harry spats standing his ground. “Playing all friendly and nice and then make a fool out of me!”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” you question narrowing your eyes at him as you lean against the kitchen island’s counter. “If anyone played dirty it’s you! And you have the balls to come here and talk like this to me in my own fucking home?!” you snap, walking closer to him, keeping your deathly glare on him.
“What the fuck did I do?!” he scoffs throwing his hands into the air.
“You created a whole new brand just to fuck with me! Or did you think I wouldn’t find out about it?!”
“Me? You made a new brand! And you didn’t do a great job hiding the fact that it was your work, even the name is Italian, like your current one!”
You stare back at him, tilting your head to the side as you process what he is talking about. All along, the two of you were accusing each other of something neither of you did.
“Harry,” you breathe out, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Farfalla is not my brand.”
“And I’m supposed to believe it?!”
“Well you better be because it’s the fucking truth!”
“Prove it!” he hisses at you, taking a step closer, his face only inches away from yours now.
“Until about twenty seconds ago I thought that it was your new brand, Harry. I thought that you were the one who backstabbed me!” you snap back, standing up for yourself in this giant misunderstanding you fell into, accusing each other without any proof.
Harry stares back at you, his gaze burning into yours as he stands his ground and you can almost see the gears turning in his head as he processes your words.
“So… it’s not yours? You didn’t do it to fuck me up?”
“Of course not!” you breathe out, suddenly quite tired of all the anger that’s been eating you away through the afternoon. “I thought that we had a kind of silent agreement not to mess with each other so I wasn’t planning anything anytime soon. That’s why I got so mad when I thought you did it!”
“I thought the same!” he growls shaking his head. “I thought you did it all to just make me look stupid, that the friendly act was just so I wouldn’t notice a thing and I fell right into your trap.”
“There was no trap,” you simply tell him and you hope he senses the hidden meaning behind your words.
Luckily he does. But for your biggest surprise there’s no snarky comment or smug smirking, he just steps closer and before you could even protest, his hands find your waist and he pulls you against his hard chest, lips hungry attacking yours. He makes you back until you bump against the kitchen island, his hips pressing against yours as he pushes you against the hard surface, his hands wandering on your sides and back, up and down, exploring every curve of your body while his kisses never slow down, your tongues meeting in the middle.
Bringing up a leg you curl it around his hips, your heel digging into his round ass as he leans forward, making you arch your back, leaning onto the counter as his lips move from your lips to your jawline and neck, his fingers digging into your waist and the thigh that’s lifted by his side. He nibbles on the soft skin of your neck, definitely leaving a mark, but you just comb your fingers through his hair, letting yourself get lost in the sensation.
“As much as I would love to fuck you on a counter again, can we take this to a bedroom?” he mumbles as he kisses his way back up to your lips, smirking against them as he captures them again.
You don’t answer, just grab his hand and pull him upstairs with you, right into your bedroom. He is all over you, lips, hands, tongue, pressed up against you as the two of you stumble your way to your king sized bed. Harry’s fingers fidget with the corset on your dress, but he soon realizes it’s a little trickier than he expected, so leaning back he furrows his eyebrows as he glances down at the dress, still trying to figure out how to get you out of it.
“Harry,” you smile at him softly. “It’s faux. There’s a zipper at the back,” you inform him and he sighs in defeat as he kisses you again, his fingers quickly finding the zipper. The dress pools at your feet and you rid him from his jacket and shirt, revealing his inked chest, a sight you’ve been thinking about way too much lately.
By the time the two of you fall to your bed, neither of you are dressed in more than just your underwear. Because both of you like to be in charge, you roll around for a while, trying to get on top of each other but eventually Harry stays up when he starts going down on you, kissing his way through your heated skin. You don’t shy away when his hands snake under your back and easily unclasps your bra, being bare in front of him is not something that makes you feel uncomfortable or insecure. The way he looks at you, the way he makes you feel brings you so much confidence, you have absolutely no problem being nude.
When your bra flies to the floor, Harry leans back a little to admire you lying there, before his lips find their way over the curve of your breasts, down your stomach. Hooking his fingers into the elastic of your panties he tugs them down easily as you lift your hips, your thighs parting as you bare yourself in front of him.
“Don’t be shy about screaming my name,” he smugly tells you before his lips and tongue meet your clit. Your fingers lace through his hair immediately as you gasp out at the sensation, his tongue drawing the whole fucking alphabet to your bundle of nerves. His arms curl around your thighs, ring clad fingers digging into your flesh as he sucks on the sensitive skin.
“Fuck, Harry! Yes!” you moan out, tugging on his locks when he teases his tongue around your hole, your walls tightening around nothing as you are growing desperate to feel something inside of you.
You pull on his hair, signaling him that you want to get it on with, Hands reaching down to get rid of his boxer briefs before you blindly pull out the drawer of your nightstand, grabbing a condom. His lips eagerly meet yours as he wraps his erected cock and though you would love to have a taste of him like he did with you, you just want to feel him inside you.
“Tell me how bad you want it,” he growls against your lips, teasing you with running just the head up and down your slit.
“If you don’t fuck me right now I’m gonna rip your guts out,” you warn him, earning a soft chuckle as he kisses you again, tongue pushing into your mouth as he finally pushes inside you, his long, thick cock filling you up perfectly and it somehow feels even better than the first time.
“Go hard,” you gasp, a hand coming to grab his ass as you push him even further into you. He doesn’t need more, he starts slamming into you, his hips meeting yours roughly with each thrust, his whole length disappearing inside you every time.
He buries his head into the crook of your neck, licking and sucking on the soft skin. You almost think about telling him not to mark you, but it just turns you on even more so you let him do whatever he wants.
“I want to see you on top,” he pants, lifting his head so his gaze could meet yours. You nod, before the two of you turn around and you straddle his hips, guiding him back inside you as you sink down his length. Your hands are sprawled out on his hard chest as you find your balance in the position, Harry’s eyes roaming your body up and down, not able to get enough of how blissful you look, sitting with his cock buried inside of you, enjoying yourself to the fullest. His hands run up your thighs and upper body until they find your breasts, kneading them as you start moving your hips up and down, back and forth. When you moan his name or gasp because his cock reaches that one particular spot inside you, those are the moments he wishes he could capture on camera and watch whenever he wants.
“I want it from back,” you pant as you lean down and kiss him roughly. That’s all he needs, he helps you get off of him before you get on all four, pushing your butt up in the air while Harry kneels behind you, the sight in front of him hardening his cock even more, if that’s possible. His hands grab onto your waist as he pushes inside you, making you both let out a satisfied moan before he starts moving again.
“Fuck, you look so good like this, Y/N. I love your ass,” he growls, giving it a smack that surprises you, but you absolutely love it.
“Harry, go faster!” you whimper, feeling your orgasm nearing as you grip the comforter on the bed, desperate to reach your climax. You’re just about to reach down between your legs to play with your clit when Harry not only picks his pace up but also reaches around you, two of his fingers starting the circling motions on the bundle of nerves, making your legs shake from the pleasure.
“Come on, baby. Cum for me, cum all over my cock,” he growls, railing you from behind without missing a beat.
“Harry!” you scream when he thrusts into you so harshly, your whole body rocking in the motion.
“Come on, angel. Cum for me,” he murmurs and leaning down he wraps his arms around you, bringing you up straight, your back pressing against his sweaty chest, his hands coming to cup your breasts as he keeps thrusting up into you, pushing you over the edge.
You moan and gasp and scream his name as your walls tighten around his length, riding out your bliss and it helps him reach his own high, his hot breath hitting the back of your neck and shoulder, grunting and cursing under his breath as he fills the condom.
As his thrusts come to a halt, he sinks into a sitting position, bringing you with him, you lean against him feeling like jelly as you’re still just trying to catch your breath. Harry peppers your shoulder with small kisses before you muster the energy to break the position and lie down on the bed.
“Towel is in the bathroom,” you tell him knowing that’s what he’ll look for as he stands from the bed and you point at the door that leads to the joined bathroom. Harry nods and pads his way in there, cleaning himself up before he returns with a small damp towel, doing the same for you. He drops it to the floor next to the bed before joining you, cradling you into his arms as you take a breather together.
One hand is on your shoulder, fingers dancing on the naked skin, the other one is holding your thigh that’s across his lap while your head is resting on his chest.
“You really thought I would backstab you like that?” he hums after a while, breaking the comfortable silence.
“You did the same,” you answer, lifting your head, resting your chin on his chest.
“Touché,” he chuckles, before leaning down he kisses you shortly. “So, if neither of us did it, then we have a quite major problem on our hands.”
“I know,” you hum. “That shit looks promising and they can easily ruin both of us.”
Harry stays silent for a little, but you can see the gears turning in his head. When his gaze snaps back at you, you know he has an idea.
“Unless… we join forces.” Your eyebrows arch as you stare back at him. “I know it’s a risky move, but this is the only way to stay on the top.”
“How much you want to be joined?”
“We could start with just one line, the men part designed by someone from me and the women by someone from you. And if it presents well we can just figure out where to go from there. Obviously, the men part would be sold by us and the women by you, but we could join the pages and direct users to each other’s sites in connection with the lines.”
“That could… actually work,” you nod shortly, thinking about the idea. It needs a lot of planning, but it could actually be a big hit if you do it right. “And you’re willing to partner with me?” you ask cheekily as you push yourself up into a sitting position, Harry doing the same.
“If you haven’t noticed, I’m willing to do about anything with you,” he chuckles, making you smile at his playful answer. “I hope you know I’m not talking about just business,” he then adds with a meaningful look.
“You are still so keen on this?” you sigh, tugging your hair behind your ear.
“Do you not like being with me?”
“I do, surprisingly,” you roll your eyes, making him laugh.
“Do you not like having sex with me?”
“I think the answer is pretty obvious to that,” you give him a look as he smirks back at you.
“Yeah, but I want to hear it.”
“I enjoy having sex with you, Harry,” you roll your eyes again, but he just kisses you short but hard before leaning back.
“So then why shouldn’t we date?”
“Because we are competitors?”
“We just agreed that we should join forces. We are partners now.”
“You are running a little ahead, Harry,” you cock an eyebrow at him. “I don’t know, I haven’t been in a relationship in ages. I probably suck at it at this point,” you shrug, but it’s just a lame excuse and you both know that. Leaning closer Harry smirks at you smugly.
“I have something else you can suck.” You smack his chest at his nasty remark, but can’t push a smile back. His hand finds the back of your head as he pulls you in for another kiss. “I want you, Y/N. I really do. You are all I think about even when you are an annoying piece of shit, getting under my skin. I still want you.”
“Wow, so romantic,” you chuckle shaking your head. “What if we can’t get over our differences in the business? That can easily poison any relationship.”
“Then we’ll have a lot of mind-blowing angry and makeup sex. Those are the best. We can put all our frustration into sex, I think that’s just perfect.”
“What are you, a horny teenager? Sex is all you can think about?” you chuckle.
“It is when I’m lying in a bed with you naked. You can’t blame me,” he grins smugly and you want to hate him, you want to hate him so badly, but you can’t. You want him just as much as he wants you.
“So… partners?” he prompts, tilting his head to the side with a sweet smile as he waits for your answer.
“Partners in business and life?”
“Mhm, that’s the plan,” he nods, his smile growing wider with each passing second.
“Alright,” you breathe out. “So… it’s not—All is fair in war and business?” you ask teasingly, using his own words from earlier.
“Just shut up and kiss me,” he laughs, pulling you in for another kiss.
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engie-ivy · 3 years
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Marlene’s little brother has a thing for Sirius, because who doesn't have a thing for Sirius? Marlene is freaking out, and everyone thinks it's just hilarious. Remus would've thought it was hilarious too, had Marlene’s little brother not been very close in age, cute, witty, and oh so bloody charming.
Somewhat longer fic that will be added to my Crush Confessions Series! 3756 words, so not that long. Wolfstar Fluff, of course😎
Muggle Charms
James Potter’s garden party is the event of the summer. Everyone gets together at the Potter estate for a day of listening to music, swimming in the lake (yes, there’s a lake on the grounds of the Potter estate), and playing friendly Quidditch matches. Mrs Potter walks around with all sorts of delicious foods, James and Sirius fly their brooms above the lake and make bets who dares to jump off from the greatest height, Mary and Emmeline are sunbathing and make bets who will need to be healed first.
It had started the summer after first year with just the four Marauders, but every year, their number has grown, and this year is the largest group thus far.
Marlene McKinnon is last to arrive, and, as usual, her arrival doesn’t go unnoticed.
“Everyone, come meet my little brother!” She shouts across the field.
The McKinnons have four children. Marlene’s mother and two of her siblings are Muggles, while the rest have magical abilities. Marlene’s sister is the oldest of the siblings. She’s a Muggle who works as a primary school teacher. Despite growing up with a father who’s a wizard, she has always felt slightly uncomfortable around magic, but she loves her family fiercely and is very protective over her younger siblings. As she’s much older than Marlene, she has always been more like a second mother.
Next comes Marlene’s older brother, who’s wizard, but has finished Hogwarts long ago. He now works in the Sales Department for a company that develops novel potions against levitation- and portkey-sickness. According to Marlene he’s a serious businessman by day, and a giant goofball by night.
Last is Marlene’s younger brother. He’s a Muggle, but where Marlene’s sister likes to pretend magic doesn’t exist, he thinks it mighty fascinating. He and Marlene are incredibly close, writing each other constantly and hanging out as often as they can when Marlene was home from Hogwarts. She has never brought him to James’ garden party, though. He works in the Food Service Industry, and the bright summer days on which James plans his parties are the days on which he most likely has to work. This year, however, he had managed to get the day off.
The first thing Remus thinks is that the McKinnons have good genes. He can’t really tell which of the two siblings is older, which means they must be very close in age. The boy has the same thick, blond hair and bright blue eyes as Marlene, as well as the same freckles from the sun. He’s short for a guy, barely taller than Marlene, but he’s quite muscular, with broad shoulders. All in all, Marlene’s younger brother is a very cute guy.
“Everyone, this is Miles!” Marlene says, when everyone has gathered around. “Let’s see... Here we have James Potter, he’s the host.”
Miles grins at James. “Some house you’ve got here, mate. Thanks for having me!”
James grins back and lifts his beer. “Cheers, mate!”
“James is Lily’s boyfriend,” Marlene says. “You’ve already met Lily-” Miles gives Lily a warm smile “-and of course you know Dorcas.”
“Hullo Dorky.”
“Hiya Miley.”
“And here we have my other girls, Alice Fortescue, Mary McDonald and Emmeline Vance.” Marlene points each of the girls out, and Miles gives them all a friendly nod.
“And these two are the Prewetts, Fabian and Gideon- don’t worry about who’s who, none of us actually knows.”
“Oi!”
“And this is Caradoc Dearborn, and this Benjy Fenwick, so miraculously you’re not the shortest guy here.”
“Marlene!”
“And here we have the rest of the renegades, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black.”
The chance in Miles is instant.
The polite smile he was wearing turns into a coy smile, as he gives Sirius a not-so-subtle once-over, though Remus doesn’t think it was ever meant to be subtle. Miles takes a step forward towards Sirius. “Well, hello there.”
Remus can’t blame him. He would’ve reacted the same had he been in Miles’ position (alright, maybe he would’ve turned into a blushing, stuttering mess and forget his own name if he were suddenly faced with a guy like Sirius, instead of step forward with an enticing smile and flirtatious greeting, but that’s beside the point). Sirius looks bloody amazing. His swimming trunks are clinging to his legs, and his damp hair is hanging over his bare chest, with little droplets dripping down his muscular body.
Sirius grins knowingly at Miles. “Hi.”
Marlene’s head whirls around from Miles to Sirius to Miles and back to Sirius, so fast Remus worries she might get a whiplash.
“No,” she says. “No, nope, uh-uh, absolutely not. Not. Happening. No.”
She steps between her brother and Sirius, facing the latter, and jabbing a finger against his chest. “You are not going to try anything on my little brother, got it?”
Sirius holds up his hands and takes a step back. “I only said hi.”
Marlene looks at him suspiciously, like she suspects Sirius saying hi is some sort of secret seduction technique (which would actually explain a lot).
“C’mon Marls.” Miles moves to stand next to his sister, and throws an arm over her shoulder. He winks at Sirius. “We all just want to have a good time, don’t we?”
Marlene’s face is getting more red by the second. Her fingers are clutching her cardboard plate, causing it to rumple. She’s clenching her jaw, while intently staring at the pair a bit further on the field.
“I can’t bloody believe it,” she hisses. “If Black thinks I’ll let him hook up with my little brother, he has another thing coming!”
Miles had managed to catch Sirius when he went to grab a drink, and they have been chatting apart from the rest of the group for about half an hour now, to Marlene’s great distress, and everyone else’s amusement. Well, everyone else except for Remus, but he thinks he’s been hiding it quite well.
Remus doesn’t know how the guy does it, but Miles somehow manages to stand closer and closer to Sirius. He’s looking up at him through his lashes, with those big blue eyes and that damned smile, sometimes even going as far as to bite his lip. Sirius has definitely been blushing at some point!
While Remus is the only one who can emphasize with Marlene’s distress over the situation, he really doesn’t like how she’s blaming it all on Sirius, while evidently its her brother who’s acting like a little minx.
“Honestly, Marlene,” Lily says, shaking her head. “Didn’t you talk to Miles about there being an incredibly hot, single gay guy present?”
Remus agrees. Marlene should’ve known what would happen when she decided to introduce her brother to Sirius! You cannot bring him here knowing Sirius is looking like he does, and expect him not to react!
Marlene huffs indignantly. “My little brother is a precious angel who’s not interested in such a thing as ‘hot, single men’!”
Lily looks at Miles and Sirius. Miles seems to be laughing at something Sirius said, and touches his upper arm while doing so, letting his hand slide down Sirius’ bicep. Lily turns her head back to Marlene and raises her eyebrow.
Marlene just folds her arms over her chest and pointedly looks away.
Later, when Miles reaches up to brush a strand of hair from Sirius’ face, Marlene’s face has taken on a more purple colour. By this time, she has started angrily chewing on her cardboard plate.
Luckily, everyone’s too busy making fun of Marlene to notice Remus looks like he’s going to be sick.
Normally, a day at the Potter estate flies by, but Remus is positive this day lasts at least three times as long. But Remus has been getting through it. He hopes that after today, he won’t see Miles McKinnon of ever again. Well, he mostly hopes Sirius won’t see Miles McKinnon ever again, he can admit that . To himself, that is.
Currently, he’s sitting down with James, having a butterbeer. Just when he thinks he might make it through these last hours without further additions to his misery, Marlene comes striding their way, Dorcas on her heels.
“Potter,” she says, stopping in front of them and placing her fists on her hips. “You’ve got something I need, and I want it now!”
“Sorry McKinnon,” James says with a smirk. “I’m a one woman man.”
“In your dreams, you wanker,” Marlene snaps. “You’ve got an Invisibility Cloak, no?”
James takes off his glasses and starts polishing them with his robes. “I may or may not possess such a thing.”
Marlene rolls her eyes. “After seven years of going to school with you, I think I can safely say that you do. Well, I need you to use it. Miles asked Black to take him on a tour around the lake.” She scrunches up her nose. “And you have to follow them so you can report back to me whether Black has kept his paws off of my little brother!”
“More the other way around,” Remus mutters, but Marlene hears and glares at him.
“My sweet and innocent little brother would never do such a thing! He simply... wants to see the surroundings and needs Black for directions.”
Dorcas throws her head back and cackles loudly. “The only directions your ‘sweet and innocent little brother’ is interested in, is the fastest way to get into Sirius Black’s pants!”
Marlene directs a deadly glare at her.
Just when Remus thinks at least Dorcas knows what she’s talking about, she continues. “C’mon Marls, Miles can make his own decisions. Let the boys have some fun!”
Let the boys have some fun? That’s not a good idea! That’s the opposite of a good idea! That’s a terrible idea!
“Well,” Remus says, managing to sound surprisingly calm. “We’re on Mr and Mrs Potter’s property, and Miles has only just been introduced to the gang. I mean, he and Sirius barely know each other. I’d say it’d be rather inappropriate if something happens between them here and now. You don’t want Marlene’s brother to give off the wrong impression.”
James sighs. “What if I lend you the Invisibility Cloak, and you can follow them yourself?”
“Oh, no!” Marlene holds up her hands and takes a step back. “There are certain things I don’t ever want to see my little brother do, or hear my little brother say. If I were to... accidentally stumble upon them, I’d either have to Obliviate myself, or be scarred for life.”
Remus snorts. Not so sure about her brother being so innocent after all, is she?
“Well, Padfoot’s my brother!” James argues.
“Remember when I put in a good word for you with Lily, and finally got her to agree to go on a date with you?” Marlene plays her final card, and effectively.
“Fine!” James puts down his butterbeer and gets up. “Remus, let’s go.”
“What? Me? Why?”
“Because you got me into this, Mr ‘it’d be inappropriate’. And besides, I’ll feel like some perverted Peeping Tom spying on them alone.”
“So better to have two Peeping Toms?” Remus argues, but he knows it’s an argument he’s not going to win.
That’s how Remus finds himself in the place he wants to be least of all, crouched down under the Invisibility Cloak with James, and, after casting a quick Silencio over their footsteps, following on Sirius and Miles on their ‘casual, totally not romantic, definitely not a date’ stroll.
“-and once I’ve gained enough experience, I’d like to come back to London and open my own restaurant!” Miles finishes.
“That’s amazing, Miles!” Sirius exclaims. “I’ll definitely frequent!”
“As long as you don’t expect any free food just because you’re so handsome,” Miles teases.
Sirius gasps in pretend-shock. “I would never use my looks for such purposes!”
“Right,” Miles chuckles. “You be careful, Sirius Black. A face like yours is a powerful weapon.”
“Wow,” James whispers admiringly. “He’s good!”
Remus grits his teeth. Of bloody course Miles McKinnon is all charming and smooth, chatting Sirius up.
“What about you?” Miles asks. “What are your plans for the future, now that you’re some kind of strong and powerful wizard?”
“I’m starting my Healer training soon!” Sirius beams, and Remus can’t help but smile at the pride in his voice.
“That’s... like a doctor, right?” Miles asks.
“Yeah,” Sirius replies. “But without the cutting people open.” He shudders. “Definitely no cutting people open.”
“Oi!” Miles protests, bumping his shoulder against Sirius. “Doctors cut people open to save lives, you know. They don’t do it for a laugh.”
“I’m sorry!” Sirius quickly says. “I didn’t mean to offend. It’s actually very impressive what Muggle doctors can do without magic, and the things they’ve come up with! I’m sorry.”
“Hey, it’s alright,” Miles says, glancing at Sirius. “Don’t worry about it.”
Sirius smiles sheepishly. “Sorry. It’s just... I was raised in this really conservative pureblood Wizarding family. I’m always afraid I’ll say something Muggle-phobic without realising.”
“It’s okay, it wasn’t that bad, honestly.”
“Good,” Sirius says, relieved. “I’m just... trying to be better.”
Miles smiles softly at him. “Just the fact that you’re trying already makes you better.”
They walk in comfortable silence for a moment, until Miles speaks again. “That must’ve been hard though, growing up in a family like that. Marlene already mentioned you’re living here now. Is that why?”
Sirius nods. “I ran away from home the summer before. Best decision I’ve ever made.” There’s a tightness in his voice, though, and an emotion in his eyes that makes Remus want to run towards him and pull him into a hug.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Miles says sincerely. Then he gives Sirius a teasing smile. “Though I must say, it’s a good look on you, the whole ‘sexy rebel’-thing.”
Sirius barks a laugh, and the pained expression slides off his face. “Well, I’m glad my issues at least fit my anaesthetic!”
Remus doesn’t know whether he wants to bless Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile, or whether he wants to curse Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile.
“I bet you love provoking your family, don’t you?” Miles asks.
“That might just be my most favourite pastime,” Sirius replies sincerely.
Suddenly, Miles stops walking, so Sirius stops as well and turns back to face him.
Miles takes a step towards him. “I bet it would really provoke your family if you were to make out with a boy, a Muggle boy at that.”
Sirius swallows and his face slightly flushes. “That... That’ll definitely do the trick, yeah.”
Miles comes even closer, now almost standing chest-to-chest with Sirius, and he tilts his head up and leans in.
James still looks mighty impressed with Miles’ flirting tactics, while Remus wonders if the sound of his heart shattering might give them away.
Suddenly, Sirius steps back. “Wait, stop. I... I can’t.”
Miles looks disappointed, but not too shocked. “Why not?” He asks. Then he jabs his finger against Sirius’ chest, much like his sister did earlier. “And I swear to god, Sirius Black, if it’s because I’m a Muggle you can stick that wand of yours up your-”
“No, no, no!” Sirius quickly says, whilst letting out a breathless laugh. “It’s not you, really, it’s me.”
Miles gives Sirius a stern look, while placing his fists on his hips, making Remus wonder whether they’re sure Marlene and Miles aren’t twins. “If you’re gonna give me that lame excuse, at least elaborate what it is about ‘not me, but you’ that makes you reject me. I mean, I’m not proposing a marriage here!”
Sirius sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “There’s... someone else. I mean, there’s not really, I don’t have someone else, but I have feelings for someone else. So therefore this-” He gestures between himself and Miles. “Just doesn’t feel right.”
Remus exchanges a look with James, who looks just as stunned as he is by this information.
Miles, though, just folds his arms over his chest and looks at Sirius thoughtfully for a moment. “So, Lupin then?”
Remus freezes. What? Him? Oh no. He’s not sure he can bear to hear Sirius’ denial. ‘Lupin? Remus? No, of course not! What in Godric’s name gave you that idea? Why the hell would I fancy Remus?’
However, Sirius just sighs and looks down at his shoes. “I’m that obvious, huh?”
Remus stares dumbfounded. It’s... true? He feels an eruption of butterflies in his stomach. Well, he always feels some butterflies when he sees Sirius, but now it’s like all those butterflies had babies, and those babies had babies again, creating an immense flutter.
“Nah,” Miles says. “If I had known for sure, I wouldn’t have made a move. I only had a suspicion, but I decided to take a chance anyway. I’m not too surprised by this turn of events, though.”
“It’s really the only reason,” Sirius says. “Because you’re bloody great, you know that? You’re gonna make some guy really happy one day. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”
Miles groans. “ ‘Its not you, it’s me’, ‘anyone would be lucky to have you’. Shall we go before you start telling me we can still be friends?”
Sirius grins. “Normally I’d suggest we at least pretend to have had a good snog, just to see if Marlene’s face can get any more purple, but I don’t want to give Remus the wrong impression. Not that he’d care,” he adds with a mutter.
Miles stops walking again. “What? Are you seri- No, Marlene warned me not to say that. Really?”
Sirius just blinks at him.
Miles shakes his head. “I mean, you asked if you were being obvious, well, you were nothing compared to Lupin. Although, that could just be me. I couldn’t help but notice when he’s looking at me like he wants me to catch fire every time I come near you. Wait. You wizards can actually do that, can’t you?”
Remus huffs. He wouldn’t have actually set Miles on fire! At least he doesn’t think so.
Sirius frowns at Miles. “You must be mistaken. Remus is nothing but pure kindness! He always makes everyone feel welcome! You can’t help but like Remus!”
A warm feeling spreads through Remus’ chest.
Miles just looks at Sirius, shaking his head. “You’re actually in love, aren’t you?”
Sirius blushes and looks away.
“Well,” Miles says. “You should tell him how you feel. He clearly feels the same. Then you can both stop this pining.”
James, who just had to process the shock of one of his best friends fancying another one of his best friends, now has to process the shock of his best friends fancying each other. He’s staring at Remus, and consequently trips over a rock. He does manage to catch is balance, but he lets out a loud yelp.
Miles stares at the empty spot behind them on the path, surprised, but Sirius’ eyes narrow in suspicion. He lifts his wand, and the next moment a gush of wind blows the Invisibility Cloak off of Remus and James.
To his credit, Miles recovers pretty quickly from seeing two people appear seemingly out of nowhere, including the person they were just talking about. He blinks a couple of times, then says “I suppose this works as well.”
Remus and Sirius are just staring at each other.
“Uhm...” James says. “I was sent here by miss McKinnon to escort the younger McKinnon back to the estate.” Because apparently awkward situations make him talk like he’s an eighteen century nobleman. “Off we go, young lad.”
Miles doesn’t protest when James grabs his arm and starts dragging him away, but he does turn around to give Sirius a thumbs up.
“We were sent here by McKinnon,” Remus quickly says, when he and Sirius are alone. “She wanted to know if anything would happen between you and her brother.” Remus takes a deep breath. “And maybe I wanted to know if anything would happen between you and him myself as well,” he says softly.
“Were you jealous?” Sirius asks. It sounds curious, not angry, judgemental or smug, just curious.
Still, Remus can’t help but pout, and he looks away. “Of course I was jealous. Bloody Miles McKinnon, with his big blue eyes, batting those ridiculously long eyelashes at you, and being all cute, and witty, and charming.”
“You know, if you want Miles to snog you instead, you should hurry and you can probably still catch him,” Sirius says irritably.
“No!” Remus quickly says. “No. I just mean, I wish it was me. When he calls you handsome, when he brushes your hair away from your face, when he leans in to kiss you... I wish it was me doing those things.”
“Why don’t you?” Sirius whispers, staring at Remus intently.
“Because!” Remus says desperately. “Because I know how to be your friend, but if I even think about flirting with you, I turn into an awkward, rambling mess.”
The only thing that can possibly be going through Sirius’ mind right now is how the hell he let the sexy, confident, flirtatious boy walk away, to be stuck with the flustered heap of awkwardness that is Remus Lupin.
Remus stares down at his shoes. “I mean, I like you a lot, and also because I feel comfortable around you, I do, but when it comes to flirting, I suddenly get scared that you’ll laugh at me or something. I even think it’d be easier if you weren’t my friend, if we didn’t know each other so well. Then maybe I could-”
Remus stops talking when Sirius gently cups his cheek and tilts his head up. Slowly, ever so slowly, he leans in, giving Remus enough time to pull away had he wanted to. Which, for the record, he absolutely doesn’t. Sirius presses their lips together. And it’s...
Well, it’s not awkward at all.
It’s fireworks, and symphonies, and the sun breaking through the clouds. It’s a sense of belonging, and knowing all is right with the world, and a feeling of coming home.
Both boys are a little out of breath when they pull back, more because of the intense emotions than because the kiss had been that passionate.
“See?” Sirius smiles at Remus. “If I want you to stop rambling, I can always just... interrupt.”
“Rude,” Remus mutters, before pulling Sirius back into another kiss.
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scented-morker · 2 years
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Elf You
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mostly humor, fluff, jay x reader, wc: 715
in which your boyfriend just came to give an energy boost to one of Santa’s elves but forgot that waiting in line also meant sitting on Santa’s lap.
The last few notes of Let It Snow finish playing over the speakers, and you smile widely to the crowd of children waiting for Santa.
You enjoyed your job as an “elf”, keeping the children entertained while some guy named Namjoon put on the fifty layers of a Santa costume in the back room.
The only downside was the report time. It was currently eleven am and you had gotten up at seven to get all the details of your costume and makeup perfect, a very tedious job for a bunch of children who would only look at you for half a second before excitedly racing to Santa.
You get a thumbs up from a worker and immediately turn to the group of people waiting around.
“Alright everyone, Santa has made his way from the North Pole and is ready to see all of your lovely faces!!”
Namjoon came out in his suit, fake belly and beard included, letting out a jolly laugh before taking his seat and seeing the first child.
You hand out candy canes for a while before being moved to camera duty, taking pictures for the mothers.
You hand out candy canes for a while before being moved to camera duty, taking pictures for the mothers.
“Well hello there young man, have you come to see Santa?”
You stifle a yawn as you turn back to the camera, only to get wide eyed at the sight of your grown boyfriend in line to see Santa.
“Um… Jay?”
He turns to you with a smile, ignoring the awkward situation he put himself in.
“You said you were tired,” you looked at him confused, both of you ignoring the shout of “elf’s don’t get tired!!” from a very in character mall Santa.
“I brought you coffee!” He smiles, handing over the cup to you.
You smile graciously at the thoughtful gesture, accepting the cup and thanking him, before sharing a grin with Namjoon.
“Elf’s are supposed to bring YOU gifts you know, not the other way around.”
“Well I thought this elf deserved a treat.”
After hearing your boyfriends kind words you almost feel bad for what you say next.
“Well we need to make sure we keep the elf industry flowing, and you did stand in line to see Santa….” You trail off and your boyfriend looks at you with a glare.
“Don’t you dare.”
“You have to get a picture with Santa, go tell him what you want so that we can pay you back for your generosity to his workers.” You smile and take a sip of your drink, waving your boyfriend towards your coworker.
“No,” he whines, “yn don’t make me do this.”
“Sorry I don’t know a yn, read the name tag, my name is Holly the elf, and I’m not letting you leave until you visit my boss!”
Jay glares at you, dragging his feet over to Namjoon who has a mischievous grin on his face.
“Good to see you again boy, climb on up and tell me what you want for Christmas!” He pats his lap and Jay stares incredulously.
“You’re kidding, right?”
“Santa would never kid about tradition,” he says patting his lap again.
Jay lets out a dramatic groan, plopping himself down and glaring at you while you snap a picture.
Once you have the print securely in your hand you march over to him, where he’s already removed himself from the older boy.
“So what do you want for Christmas Jay?”
Your boyfriend looks away from Santa and makes eye contact with you.
“My best present is already standing right here,” he grins as you blush at his cheesiness.
“Ew,” Namjoon mutters, followed by “You’re getting coal for that.”
Jay just rolls his eyes, walking over to you and placing a peck on your cheek.
“I mean it.”
“Okay no kissing the elves,” your coworker shouts and you both laugh.
“I love you.”
“I love you too,” then, “I’m still posting this picture of you on Namjoons lap though.”
“Nooooo” he whines out again and you smile.
“Now if you’ll excuse me, Holly the Elf needs to talk to some grubby children. Here’s a candy cane.”
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amjustagirl · 3 years
Text
Hogwarts AU (Haikyuu!!)
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feat. Kuroo Tetsuro
As requested by @forgetou (hope you love it bb!)
Previously: Miya Atsumu. Miya Osamu. Kita Shinsuke
Masterlist link here
Warnings: Tooth-rotting fluff
A/N: Any other characters you’d like to see? Send me an ask! 
(happy to do any characters other than Kenma / Hinata / Tendo - I don’t trust myself to do them justice!)
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‘So I hear you’re going to fill in for Hinata next match?’ 
Your head whips around. A growl builds up in your throat. 
You’d recognise that sleaze ball voice anywhere - Kuroo Tetsuro, Slytherin prefect, top student in potions and more importantly, the scumbag keeper that formulated a strategy (alongside Oikawa, that brat - but that’s besides the point) to completely break down the Gryffindor chaser trio of Hinata, Lev and Yamamoto when Iwaizumi was out for an injury the last Quidditch match. 
If you weren’t playing against them, you’d admit that the Slytherin strategy was perfect. Suna and Daishou caged Hinata in with non-stop bludger head shots, and the Miya twins flew literal circles around Lev - still a beginner, so you’ll cut him some slack, so much that the two idiots collided when Kuroo feinted forward and they thought they finally had a chance to score. 
So now you have to step into Hinata’s position for the match next weekend.
You like Quidditch well enough, but you don’t have an overwhelming passion for it the way Hinata or Oikawa or Atsumu or heck, even Yaku does - monsters, the lot of them. You play it for fun, you enjoy being a reserve member, and you’d never expected that you’d have to play in an actual match with Iwaizumi, Lev, Hinata and Yamamoto all playing chaser already. 
You’re scared - and you hate feeling this way, especially a Gryffindor like you, so you snarl and hiss and kick your feet when Yaku drags you away from Kuroo, the demon keeper scolding you not to ‘cause a scene in the Great Hall - seriously, what are you five?’, though Lev and Yamamoto cheers you on. 
‘Come on, let’s make a bet on our match next weekend’, Kuroo calls after you, and you flail hard in Yaku’s arms enough that Yaku loses not just his balance, but his grip on you. 
‘Sure’, you shout defiantly, not caring that the pair of you have attracted an audience. You can see the entire Slytherin team five steps away, matching Cheshire grins on all of their faces. Your blood boils and you’re ready to accept the terms of whatever stupid bet this rooster head proposes. 
Kuroo’s grin widens. ‘I bet you can’t even get five goals past me.’ 
‘I bet you I can’, you retort, even as your heart sinks. Kuroo isn’t quite as good as Yaku, but he’s devious and brilliant at feints and you’re not even a starter on the Gryffindor team. But you’ve dug yourself into a hole, and you’re determined to commit to your position, damnit, so you keep your voice steady as you ask for his terms. 
‘If I win, you’ll have to go on a date with me the next weekend’. He waggles his eyebrows at you suggestively, eyes crinkling at its corners in amusement as you mouth an outraged ‘what the hell?’ and Yaku starts shouting bloody murder himself. 
You gather yourself and resist Yaku’s attempts at pulling you away. ‘And if I win, what do I get?’ 
Kuroo laughs airily. ‘I highly doubt that, but name your price, sweetheart’. 
You think of the most embarrassing thing you could possibly inflict on this smug bastard, your eyes landing on the ridiculous mop of hair on his head and it’s your turn to grin, sharp and full of edges. 
‘Fine. If I win, you’ll shave your head’. 
‘Deal.’ 
Kuroo sticks his hand out to you and you take it. You feel like you’ve just made a deal with the devil himself. 
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Iwaizumi nags you to bits when Yaku tells him of the entire debacle, the Gryffindor keeper throwing himself dramatically across the locker room bench, complaining that he’s done being a damn babysitter to this lot of idiots without any sense of self preservation. 
‘You’re gonna need a whole lot of training in that case’, Iwaizumi tells you grimly, and you sigh, because you know it’s not going to do any good. 
And you’re right, because even though you’ve spent the entire week training and running drills in snow and sleet and rain, it’s not enough. You barely get three goals against Kuroo in the match, let alone five - and to be fair, one of them was when you literally threw Lev against him when the referee wasn’t looking, so you resign yourself to his mocking looks when the whistle blows, marking the end of the match where Oikawa outsmarts Kageyama to grab the snitch out of the air first. You feel a kinship with the captured snitch, the pathetic fluttering of its wings so much like your futile attempts to win the damn bet. 
Kuroo smirks at you knowingly when you refuse to take his hand at the end of the game. ‘I guess I’ll be seeing you next weekend?’ he asks, eyes glinting as you huff and fold your arms across your chest. 
‘Fine, I guess’, you answer with a distinct lack of grace. You don’t notice when his smirk turns into a genuine smile. 
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The Gryffindor boys crowd around you, groaning in disappointment when you tell them no they’re not allowed to follow you around Hogsmeade, even if you’re on a date with Kuroo Tetsuro - and no, Lev, a disguise is not going to work, your height and ridiculous hair makes you far too conspicuous for that! 
‘I’ll beat him up if he does anything’, Iwaizumi threatens, and you roll your eyes at his overprotective streak. 
‘I’ll be fine’, you reply, shrugging off Yaku’s attempts at giving you ridiculous magic artifacts intended to ward off wandering hands. Kuroo Tetsuro may be insufferable and smug and a general pain in the butt, but he’s not an absolute piece of shit - plus, you’re handy with your wands in duels so you’re certain you can handle anything he throws at you. 
You don’t even bother putting on a lick of makeup when you prepare to meet him. He magicks an enchanted paper plane to land on your desk during potions to tell you that he’ll pick you up from Gryffindor tower at three o’clock sharp, and he’s leaning against the pillar with feline grace as you tumble out of the portrait hole, your teammates shooting him deadly glares as he sweeps you off with his palm warm against the small of your back. 
‘Want to grab a drink first?’ he asks, with a surprising amount of concern when your nose turns pink in the cold. 
You nod hesitantly, expecting him to drag you into the pink and white monstrosity that is Madam Puddifoots to complete your humiliation, but he doesn’t - holding the door open to the Three Broomsticks, ushering you into the corner booth, ordering a pint of butterbeer for you. 
‘My team’s not here, don’t worry’, he says, laughing when you glance around the pub, eyes narrowed for any signs of that odious Oikawa or the bothersome Miya twins - or worse, snarky Suna and devious Daishou, but Kuroo isn’t lying, none of them are around to witness the indignity of your date with one Kuroo Tetsuro. 
‘Do you drag unwilling girls into pubs often?’ you snark, tapping your fingers on the table irritably. 
‘Nah, only you’, he answers easily, smirk widening with mirth when you wrinkle your nose at him. ‘Come on, lighten up a bit - we might as well get to know each other since we’re going to be spending the whole afternoon together.’
‘Fine’, you say sourly, brightening only when the bartender brings your drinks. ‘Why don’t you tell me about yourself’. 
 And so even though you’ve been classmates with Kuroo for years, you learn for the first time that he’s not intending to be a professional Quidditch player when he graduates next year, even though you admit he’s a talented keeper in his own right. 
‘Really? You’re giving up Quidditch?’
‘Yeah - I have it all thought out I’m going to study potions further and figure out how to revolutionise the potions industry - d’you know the muggles have a pharmaceuticals industry that’s like our potions industry, only hugely profitable?’ 
It’s so typical of a Slytherin that you can’t help but snort. 
But then he disarms you with funny stories of himself growing up. You learn that his parents separated when he was only five, and as a result, he stayed mostly with his grandparents growing up. You learn that he was lonely and shy and awkward - really? you? you choke on your butterbeer incredulously  - at least until he moved next door to Kenma from Ravenclaw. 
‘I introduced him to Quidditch, and he’s a natural at coming up with strategies’, he says proudly, proceeding to chatter fondly of quiet, unsociable Kenma, who you can tell is his little brother in all but name and blood.
You tell him about growing up with three older brothers - all Gryffindors, just like you. He listens to your stories about breaking your arm when you stole your eldest brother’s broom, chuckles at your recounting of the pranks you pull on your teammates to remind them that you may be a girl, but you can take of yourself just fine - because Iwaizumi and Yaku tend to take their protective side a tad too far sometimes.  
It’s so pleasant that you forget that your date is the result of a bet, and you don’t even think twice about raising a napkin to gently wipe the froth from butterbeer off the corner of Kuroo’s mouth - it comes with the territory of being teammates with messy eaters like Hinata and Kageyama - until he freezes in shock. 
‘I’m sorry!’ you blurt out, mortified. But instead of teasing you for your forwardness, Kuroo turns bright red and gapes at you. He must think you’re an idiot. ‘Um - d’you want to check out Honeydukes before they close?’ you ask, in a desperate attempt to diffuse the awkwardness of the situation.
That jolts Kuroo out of his daze. Thankfully, any awkwardness vanishes when he slides out of his seat to steal the bill from you. You complain because he refuses point blank to split the bill with you, and he even playfully keeps his hands above his head to avoid your attempts at pressing coins into his hands until you reach the candy store. 
You watch in amusement as he loads his basket with chocolates and sweets for his team. He gets dark chocolate for Miya Osamu, and white chocolate for his twin Atsumu - at this point, I’m convinced they’re just determined to like the opposite of what the other prefers just to be contrary, he laughingly tells you. He gets creamy nougats for Oikawa - I should stop by the bread store to get him mlik bread, but his fangirls spoil him enough so I shan’t, he says. Ice mice for Suna to prank the twins with, tooth flossing stringmints for Daishou - he needs to clean his fangs, he jokes, and a whole bunch of chocolate frogs to be used as bribes for Kenma to go to bed on time. 
It’s lovely and warm in the store. You have a good time tossing fizzing frisbees behind the storekeeper’s back at Kuroo, dodging as he tries to drop jellybeans down your shirt. At the checkout counter, you protest again when he slyly tells the cashier that he’ll pay for your purchases on top of his, and he doesn’t even let you carry your own chocolates as you’re walking back to the castle. 
‘I’m perfectly capable of carrying a bag of chocolates by myself’, you huff, annoyed that yet another boy is treating you as though you’re made of glass. 
‘I believe you’ Kuroo replies emphatically, pressing his hand to his chest with  dramatic flair. ‘But I’m also a kind and considerate soul, because someone forgot to bring her gloves, and I’m going to need to save your hands if you actually want a shot at trying to get more goals past me next time’. 
You scowl. ‘Fine’, but you relent grudgingly. You didn’t even know he noticed that your hands are numb and cold. You’ve just never enjoyed the cold, and to make matters worse, it’s snowing. A chilly wind picks up, and you sneeze thrice in quick succession. 
‘Can’t wait to get back indoors, or can’t wait for the date to be over?’, he comments as you pick up your pace, trudging through the cold wet snow. You open your mouth to retort, but your jaw drops when he tugs you to a stop, tucking his cloak securely over your shoulders. His body heat and the faint scent of cinnamon and butterbeer still lingers in the fabric and you can’t help but wrap his cloak tighter around yourself.  
‘There’, he says, satisfied. ‘Better?’  
You nod, not trusting yourself to respond. 
He walks you all the way back to Gryffindor tower and when you try to return his cloak, to your surprise, he refuses to take it back. 
‘Keep it for our next date’, he tells you cheekily, laughing when your eyes widen and you choke on your breath. 
‘I don’t recall hearing you ask for a second date’, you reply archly when your body finally stops its attempts at expelling your lungs from your chest. 
‘Well, I am now’, he replies. 
You look at him. Though the smirk he wears on his lips is unwavering, you can see a hint of uncertainty in his eyes. And though you’d never think you’d ever say it, but the afternoon was a pleasure, and Kuroo was a lovely date. 
You - you like him, this adorable dork of a boy who’s both charming and confident yet awkward and uncertain at the same time. He’s caring and funny and ambitious and there are so many facets of him that you’ve only discovered today - and if you’re being honest with yourself, you’re curious enough to want to delve deeper into the enigma that is one Kuroo Tetsuro. 
‘Fine’, you mumble, the tips of your ears turning pink. This time it’s definitely not from the cold. 
‘Yeah?’ he asks, quietly, uncertainly. 
‘Yeah’, you reply softly, casting your gaze down to the floor, suddenly shy. You don’t notice him take a step forward, startling as he gently tilts your chin up to face him. Your first instinct is to snap at him for coming so close, but he’s too quick for you to even react, leaning down and pressing his lips to your forehead, tenderly tucking loose strands of hair behind your ear. 
‘Next week then’, he says, with a wide smile before sweeping off, leaving you standing in the middle of the corridor, mouth open in shock. 
The portrait door swings open. 
‘WHY ARE YOU IN GREEN AND SILVER?!’ 
‘HOLY SHIT, WAIT A MINUTE IS THAT KUROO’S CLOAK?’ 
‘Did he curse you? DO WE NEED TO DEFEND YOUR HONOUR?’ 
You bury your burning face in your hands. Your teammates are not going to take this well. 
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meruz · 3 years
Text
i was gonna draw tonight but i dropped my tablet pen and the barrel of the pen broke off and flew somewhere underneath (??) my bed (?) and now i cant find it so I’m just gonna answer asks before bed instead. just some art asks and more mentions of infinity train LOL
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What program and brushes do you use when making your art?
@ravki hi! part of this is in my FAQ but i’ll say it again anyways LOL: I use photoshop CC and have used photoshop for pretty much....my whole art career. I’ve dabbled in clip and paint tool sai in the past but photoshop is my true wife, we eloped away from her awful father adobe many years ago and are very happy together. 
as for brushes... I should prob put this info in my FAQ too lol,... my default brush set is actually free to download here! Tho I will say I also use steve ahn’s storyboarding brush sometimes and lately i’ve been using shiyoon kim’s brushes A TON. Shiyoon’s cost a couple bucks but they’re super worth it imo
How do you choose colors?
This is kind of a difficult one to describe from scratch but hmm.... I’ll put it this way. Generally when I go into coloring or painting something I already have some colors in mind. Like for a certain piece I know I want a bright green, or a magenta, or a dark blue in certain areas. A lot of the time I know a mood I want. So I’ll start with that core color tone and build around it. I’ll use an example from a recent piece
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So you can see here that the first color I accessed was that bright cyan. So I start with that bright cyan and then bring in its “friends” in the form of analogous colors (shown below on the far left)
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greens greys etc. THEN I know I want the characters to stand out against all the blue so I start laying down warm contrasting colors for them (middle group). the mat under them is orange, skin tones are warm, ryans flannel is red etc. then to get them to work together I work more cool colors into the shadows and slightly warmer (not too warm because its a cool img overall so in this case, greener LOL) colors into highlights. 
hope that makes sense? for me choosing colors is a lot about story and composition. If you know what you want to say, the mood you want to create, where you want to go, the path to get there becomes a lot clearer imo.
Have you ever considered making an art book?
I have! But I don’t think I currently have enough...original illustrations for one LOL? Not that an art book has to be all original work but if I were putting fanart in an art book...at that point I’d just make a fanzine. I’m making more original work lately though so maybe this year....? Who knows. For now, I do have a sketchbook up on gumroad. Hoping to do one of those next year too.
Any tips for keeping background drawings from getting super stiff, especially since things like interiors have a lot of straight lines?
This is a really interesting ask. Really great question that I don’t think gets asked enough - forgive me if I get a bit art school here but I drew up some examples.
First I think we have to investigate the assumption that straight lines make things stiff. That seems true on an instinctual level and certainly proves to be true very often But I don’t think its actually the straight lines themselves but the sort of arrangements and compositions they tend to dictate. Take this for instance.
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pretty big difference, right? there’s a couple things that make a composition feel stiff and one of the most significant is lines that are perpendicular and parallel to the frame. it feels locked in and solid, like bricks. but the moment you shift these angles even a little the composition instantly becomes more dynamic because our innate senses of weight, gravity, and directionality can sense movement.
But it’s not just diagonals let’s take this one step further
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when lines meet and terminate together those tangents can flatten and lock space so the best way to solve this is with overlap and complete intersection, forms continuing past or behind each other feel more layered and less like a flat mosaic... again, even in the simplest line drawings. So how do we apply this to a background?
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ok I drew this really fast so its potentially not the best example but I think the idea is there. This space isn’t even particularly deep, it’s basically a room, a doorway, and a hallway behind it, and we’re not seeing that much of any of those things LOL. but when you draw an environmental object like a doorway in a way that lines up with the perpendicular and parallel lines of the canvas you’re automatically flattening it and making it look rigid.
and when you create tangents with objects and characters you flatten the space around them and make it difficult to tell what is actually in front or behind or if they’re on the same plane.
GOD I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE. Anyways. avoid those things and you’ll instantly have less stiff bgs no matter what kind of bg you’re depicting.
I wanna mention however that this isn’t to say a stiff bg with flat space doesn’t have its purposes.
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sometimes you want to create parallels and tangents. it can make characters feel closed in, trapped, regimented, part of a routine, etc. it’s also great for making a composition look ornamental (especially combined with symmetry).
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directors like wes anderson can even use these compositional elements to make images feel uncanny or harrowing! its very versatile. I think the important thing is to just be aware of when you are making something rigid and when that’s the last thing you want to do. conscious choices.
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Can you speak Tagalog?
@lemuelzero101​ I can! BUT NOT VERY WELL LOL ;;; both my parents are from Visayas! but they met and had me in the states lol so I’m pretty American born and raised. We go back to visit family on occasion but not regularly. My tagalog is mostly absorbed from listening to relatives at parties lol and my parents speak bisaya at home so I’m marginally better at that. Sorry to any filipinos out there hoping I’d be better educated, I’m like a little baby...
I do love meeting and talking to other filipinos online though, I grew up in an area that was relatively diverse but the asian population was small and the filipino population basically non-existent. I was like one of maybe 2 filipino kids in my highschool of 2000.
Apart from infinity train what shows are you watching now? Have you seen jujitsu kaisen?
Man this is gonna sound so boring but I haven’t watched a lot of tv lately.  It’s not really part of my daily routine. Let’s see... I was sort of watching Amphibia, Craig of the Creek, and the new Digimon Adventure 2020 but I keep falling off watching those for one reason or another. Also there’s a lot of episodes, it doesn’t feel like something I can just binge and be done with.
The last thing I binged was Succession. I want that show and Euphoria back so bad, when I’m done forcing all my friends to watch Infinity Train im cancelling my HBO subscription until Succession and Euphoria return so they know exactly what I’m on their list for LOL. 
I have not watched jujitsu kaisen but I’ve kept up with some of the sakuga news (I keep up with anime industry news and production info like x5 the amt i keep up with actual anime) for it and their compositing/editing looks dope. I’ve read the manga actually LOL or at least part of the beginning. I wasn’t super keen on the whole finger eating thing. Also to be honest I kinda feel like its the new Bleach and I never particularly cared about Bleach. Characters look nice enough tho. I wholeheartedly support jjk fans.
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Thank you! Thank you @keznodzieja​! <3
And thank you anons who don’t watch infinity train LOL...it’s always nice to hear when people enjoy my fanart despite not knowing the source material because it lifts a little bit of the “oh god am I being annoying???” fear off my chest. But also I think you should watch infinity train because it’s really good I have no reservations recommending it.
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