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maddy-ferguson · 4 months

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women will literally accuse women and esp lesbian circles of "not unpacking ""man-hating""" alleged ""misandry" sweetie xo" getting offended ppl aren't appropriately uplifting how "men are amazing and awesome and attractive and i won't be shamed for thinking so" as if appreciating men is a real counter opinion than blame whatever gave women of every sexuality instance to be jaded weary cautious and tired and who'll complain every now and then and continue on with her life until she dies putting up with patriarchy. just welcome to the "woke" internet where misogyny's over and "man-hate" "shamed for not hating men" is worth springing to defences for

yeah i've only seen people talk like men's rights activists and think they're being unbelievably progressive on tumblr it's kind of fascinating. like i can see how seeing people hate on men could mess with people and stuff but you can't demand men appreciation posts that's literally the whole world outside of idk your tumblr dash (or even on your tumblr dash because fandom misogyny from people who think they're not misogynistic at all is really something). men get praised for "babysitting" their own kids like be serious? it's very let men be masculine

i don't think being like men are soooo gross and we hate them is actually constructive and it can definitely veer into transphobia (you'll always be a man/"a male" and thus a danger to women/why would you ever want to become a man they're the enemy and the bane of society etc) and homophobia relatively quickly?

but the way people ON TUMBLR ""combat that"" is often so off to me like if the most basic feminist principles offend you then i'm not really sure where to go from here. i remember seeing a post that was like "men aren't your enemy. they're your friend/brother/father/colleague/neighbor" with a lot of notes and like i don't know how to tell you this but that's literally who's most likely to harm a woman, the men she knows?😭 and obviously not every system of oppression is exactly the same but would you say the same thing to someone criticizing white people like...just very weird

i think women who are attracted to men and dating them making jokes about how they only tolerate being attracted to men because they have no choice and especially the whole i'm bi so i love every woman and only find 1 in a 1000 men attractive (very often said while in a relationship with a man) thing is obnoxious and annoying for like everyone who has to hear it lmao but also when women who date men make jokes about it (not about them being ugly or unattractive or whatever but about them being bad partners in general) it's like. what else are they going to do like you said they're gonna endure patriarchy for the rest of their lives and as girlfriends/wives/mothers they go through the most it's very bleak? idk. it's not like you can date a better man yourself out of patriarchy

of course men aren't a all as bad as the worst guy you can imagine and they're not all out to get you or whatever but saying things like "men don't all benefit from the patriarchy rich men benefit from the patriarchy but jake, 23, is not oppressing you" is like. kind of insane. jake, 14, was oppressing me like have you never interacted with boys in school😭 and it's not like it was entirely their fault we all have to outgrow misogyny it's just you know society etc but some of them never outgrow it lmao and just...the takes you see on feminism on tumblr are astounding i hate it here

#and like i do think that young guys who feel bad about themselves only having people who make them feel worse and who actively make them #worse like incels and idk youtube algorithms to turn to is a problem but like. again it's the same thing as white people who feel bad about #being white to me in a way like are women and GIRLS supposed to coddle them and say it's gonna be okay you're great even when they're #like actually harming them by being misogynistic to them? that's already what they're taught to do always #the notes on that male loneliness epidemic post i reblogged a few weeks ago still haunt me like OH MY GOD #and if you think misogyny isn't as prevalent anymore you're very naive. and probably misogynistic yourself #i'm not even sure young men being more feminist is true (well it's probably true when you compare it to like the 50s) but even #when men ARE like yeah women shouldn't have to do everything i can help with chores (the use of the word help is already a red flag lmao)#when you look at what they actually do they still do way less like i don't have links because these are tags on a tumblr ask but i read #somewhere that men think chores are 50/50 when they're only doing like 30% of the work? like it just seems hopeless #sometimes i'm happy and then i think about the mental load #sorry for not uplifting men 24/7 you can just hang out on the steve harrington tag or something there's actually a lot of people doing that #when someone said um does the ronance fandom not seem terfy to you...because of a post that was like can the lesbian ship ronance #be about the lesbian ship ronance not about steve A MAN #like you can't make this up #i meant it when i said the average tumblr user would benefit from being exposed to more misogyny like i swear they forget it's even a thing #like obviously they wouldn't BENEFIT from it lmao but their posts wouldn't be as dumb and that would benefit me🙏#ask

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dawntheduckrb · 4 months

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I'll stop posting wips eventually but it's been five days since I've said anything and I don't want anyone to think I'm dead/dying/stuck in a ditch and withering away, so here's 10% of the reason I disappeared (the duck is stuck in rendering hell) (and my little baby laptop is screaming at me every time I open up this file)

I might still be mostly lurking for a little bit so please be patient with me in the meantime 🙏🙏

#seriously though I'm sorry for just up and disappearing like that #wanna talk to people and interact with them so bad lately but I just can't bring myself to do it #so the best i can manage is blabbing in the tags like always #i don't know wtf is going on but over the past few days I've just felt like i don't deserve to talk to anyone #tried to reblog posts from mutuals several times but something in my head keeps saying;#'yeah they don't actually care for your input at all and you're being a bother for even trying etc etc'#and i know deep down that's probably not true (i hope) but i can't reason it away you know #and i know the best solution to this is to just talk to someone #let it be known that i *did* make an attempt to #i tried texting someone (and succeeded) but i couldn't keep doing it and I'm back at square one (and now feel worse lmao)#i'm not really putting this here for anybody to see it as much as i am for myself #but i know that (hypothetically) this could be seen by a real human so it still kinda feels like I'm reaching out in a way which feels nice #makes me feel less like I'm shriveling up in my own self imposed solitude #so uh hello person who might be reading the tags (there's six of you guys here now which is crazy cause i post nothing but junk here lol)#((but thanks anyway for following and even more thanks for reading this if you did))#i'll make my way around all the posts i missed soon enough don't worry #i'm sorry i'm really not meaning to ignore anybody #i have drafted quite a few posts from moots that i couldn't finish leaving comments on but i have seen them #everyone here is super cool and talented as always <3 whether that be through art or writing or just finding neat posts to share #this wall of text is long enough and i'm very eeby so thank you again for reading this #tldr; not dead and i'll be okay eventually :)#not rb #hey look i didn't post a picture of my dog this time (a crime)#i'll make sure to share one the next time i get a good one

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myburntwritings · 6 months

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Day 27: The most special visit to the City for you.

I had great shows. I had some truly incredible shows. But honestly, I don't believe I had a singular 'most special' show. My special moments were so split across various visits that I don't think I could choose between them.

Perhaps, if I'd had a singular special show near the beginning of my visits, I would feel differently. However, honestly, I'm almost glad I didn't. I know me, and I would have been chasing that 'special show' again, and that would have led to constant measuring against a likely unattainable goal. I'm glad my special moments were spread around, because that made them more special in my mind and not comparable to the others.

If I'm having to pick a singular show, the only reasonable answer for me is the final show, 24th September 2023. We're now over a month after the show closed, and I still haven't spoken publicly about why this show was so incredibly special to me. This is in part due to the personal nature of what made it special, but also because I didn't want to brag. I didn't want to upset anyone who perhaps didn't get the same level of cathartic gratitude that I was lucky enough to experience.

My desire not to upset others is not down to reactions from other people. I have never received anything other than excitement and joy when I have been gifted an interaction they perhaps didn't get while on the same loop. Everyone I know in the Burnt City community has been unwaveringly supportive of the spread of love when it comes to special moments. This is my own internalised fear, baseless given previous interactions with fellow fans. But, things get bigger when we internalise them, don't they?

Everyone who knows me personally, who met up with me before or after shows, who were the recipients of my 'Burnt City Story Times' (actually only one person, but she knows well enough.) knows without a doubt who my favourite performers are. Standing in the queue before the show, when someone would inevitably ask who I planned on following, there was the 'of course you are' response when I told them I planned on following Georges, Seirian, Milton, or Tim. I so enjoyed their performances that I followed them repeatedly. And if I didn't know who I was going to follow, others would invariably find me following one of these talented performers at some point during the show.

It also helped that these performers held roles of some of my favourite characters, so if I wanted to follow a favourite character, there was a good chance I was following one of these performers.

For my final show, I wanted to split my time between my favourite performers, as much as I wanted to see favourite characters. I had planned on doing Apollo, Kronos, Apollo so I could see both Seirian and Georges in the role of Apollo, and follow Milton for his final loop as Kronos.

I had a premium ticket, so got into the building reasonably early (that VIP/Premium queue was LONG) and as I was having my ticket scanned, a FOH black mask gently gripped me by the elbow and pulled me aside. She told me that she knew I'd been to the show a lot, and if I wanted to skip the museum entry, they would be letting some people in through one of the side doors in Peep. The queue was huge, I think they were trying to relieve some of the pressure of people getting in. She told me where to go in Peep and left it to my decision.

Once in Peep, I asked one of the FOH staff if I was in the right place. I didn't need to go through the museum again, and the crowd around the entrance was already getting unmanageable for me to stand in that crush for an extended period. They said yes, I was in the right place, and if I wanted to grab a few friends who also wouldn't mind skipping the museum, that was fine. A few, mind. Don't go around telling everyone.

I grabbed three friends and told them about the side entrance. They all happily joined. There were maybe a dozen of us waiting in the side area of Peep. As the first group were let into the mask room, we were ushered to the door and handed stamped masks. We were told we could keep these masks, and they opened the door Apollo and Artemis usually enter Peep by, six of us let through. The next group would be let in as the second main group entered the mask room.

The first group were still in the mask room, or maybe just being sent through to Hades. We six were the first people in the space; an incredible privilege.

I went into the Town Square, and found Louis J Rhone as Polymestor stood in the centre of the square, taking a moment to himself. He noticed my arrival, nodded, and walked away. I was practically floating that I was so lucky as to be one of the first people in the space, and I decided that I wanted a final moment alone in the Tenement Square, one of my favourite locations. So, I headed straight there.

Only, I wasn't alone. I wasn't the first into that space. Milton Lopes was already stood in the Tenement Square. He was stood next to the pillar, not doing anything. I went and stood in my favourite spot (see Day 9 answer) and Milton and I just watched each other. Gods only know what he was thinking, but we both just stood there, letting it all soak and sink in.

Tenement Square slowly filled in around us, and when he moved to start his loop, I knew I couldn't stick with my plan. I currently hate Hades for being right that words cannot describe it. The feeling that went through me at that moment. I couldn't not follow Milton into the Cyclops room. I wouldn't be able to leave his loop until he did. I knew I would regret it if I did anything else. I would never stop regretting it if I didn't go with my instinct to follow him after that moment, the two of us reflecting in the Tenement Square.

Now, it's worth noting here that I have not been the recipient of any interactions from Milton in any role for some months at this point. The one scripted interaction I received was that he threatened me with the chisel maybe a month or two before. He knows how many times I've followed. He knows I've had all of the interactions before, and Milton was always so good at choosing new people to interact with where he could.

So, by the time we get into the tenement rooms for what I call the 'forwards backwards' sequence, I am comfortable with the fact that this would be like every other show. He would give interactions to the people he didn't recognise. He takes the seat in the first room and picks up the litter-picker device. There are a lot of people behind me trying to see, so I skirt around the edge to stand behind the chair and watch the interaction.

Only, he looks over his shoulder at me and snaps the picker in my direction. I cautiously step forwards, and he takes hold of the rim of my mask with the picker, lifting it up onto my head. He throws the picker aside and approaches me. He puts my mask back in place, he holds my shoulders tightly, and leans in towards me.

"Thank you."

Another thing you should know about me at this point is that I am an emotional sap. I cry at anything. I'm crying writing this. But those two words from one of my favourite performers in a show that I have loved so fiercely, broke me into pieces. Milton moved off to the continue through the rooms, and I was frozen, tears streaming down my face as the rest of the sizeable group of people on the loop filed past me after him.

A number of people passing by me were friends, and each of them grasped me by the arm, by the hand, by the shoulder. A squeeze of understanding, perhaps of recognition that they would be exactly the same in my situation.

I stayed at the back of the group. I waited for the backwards portion, and to see the Kronos wall crawl from the far end. We went into Klub, and I watched that scene from behind Polymestor's desk so that I could see Polydorus dancing in the office while Polymestor, Kampe, and Kronos performed in Klub. My favourite position to watch that scene.

We returned downstairs, and through the rest of the loop, as expected, a variety of people were chosen for each interaction. I'd had my interaction, my gift. I was exceedingly happy with that. But I had always known I wanted to follow Milton for his final loop, so I stuck around in the tenement square over reset as he took someone for the 1:1. I watched Apollo and Cassandra dance with Seirian as Apollo, so I was thrilled I got to see that.

And onto loop 2 we went.

This time it was as we were leaving Klub. In the Elysium hotel corridor, Milton's Kronos would storm back through the crowd and then find a spirit to sniff as he tries to work out what is following him. I've had this interaction on many occasions, (I sometimes joke that I was sniffed so often, Milton could probably pick out my perfume at the Boots counter) and knowing I'd had my moment in loop 1, I was not expecting for Milton to slam his hand against the wall right next to my head. He sniffed me, and then pulled back to look me in the eye.

He nodded and set off again. And once again, I found myself frozen for a moment as my brain caught up.

In loops 2 and 3, it is directly after this interaction that Kronos goes down and selects the mid-loop 1:1. The crowd around Kronos was huge at this point. Going down the stairs, I was at least a dozen people back, and there were at least another dozen behind me as he did a backbend on the banisters and stared up the stairs at us.

I was easily in the third row of the circle of people around the 1:1 door. There were people who had been around since the beginning of the loop, and those who had started following as we left Klub. Milton shone the torch around people's shoes as he always did, and there was a lot of shuffling as he moved around the group. Then, very suddenly, he turned the torch back, thrust his hand between two other followers, and held it right in front of me.

We went into the room, and he locked the door behind us. I am on the verge of laughing with the absurdity of it, and crying with gratitude. By the time we lay on the trolley under the car, I was emotional.

"I'm going to tell you the story of your life."

I was openly sobbing again. Tears streaming into my hair as he told me of the labyrinth. A very wet laugh as he remembered an out-of-show conversation we'd had almost a year earlier and reworded it into the text.

I'd had this 1:1 twice with Milton. Both times were before the change where the performer would put the minotaur head on. As such, I never saw the Minotaur with Milton, as he would tell you to close your eyes back in the early days, and apparently I do what I'm told.

I didn't see it this time either. Instead of putting the head on, he invited me into a hug which I gratefully accepted. I never saw the Minotaur while with Milton's Kronos. This fact amuses me.

We left the 1:1 and went straight back into the Tenement Square. Milton performed a crucifix aerial move against the wall, went into room 8 and closed the door... and he was done. The next time the door opened with Louis' Polymestor carrying Polydorus into the room, it was Nick's Polymestor who emerged afterwards, and Louis Kronos.

Milton's performances were done.

Obviously, I can't speak to Milton's reasoning for choosing me, or his feelings about that final show. All I can do is be incredibly grateful that he chose to share some of these final moments with me. That his performance (and I have said that it was never about the 1:1s, it was always his performance that kept me coming back) that Sunday afternoon was so deeply emotionally impacting on me. I don't think I will ever forget it.

I left Kronos behind to go and find Apollo.

I found Apollo in Peep, and followed Georges as he went through the Troy backstreets to his reset. I was stood beside one of my best friends, the person who introduced me to Punchdrunk, and an equal Georges' Apollo fan as he laid on the ledge over the door and reached a hand out to the both of us. I nudged her forwards to take his hand.

Every performer in that final show was giving it their everything. Georges Hann was incredible as he went through Apollo's story one final time. He beamed bright as sunshine when happy, and was entirely devastating when he wasn't.

I've said before that Georges was my Apollo. One of my favourite performers in my favourite role, and finishing this incredible, emotional rollercoaster of a show with him was perfect. It was absolutely everything I could have asked for, and I can't imagine spending that final loop with a character other than Apollo. That it was Georges in the role was as devastating as it was wonderful.

After the show ended (yes, with lots of tears during the finale from me) most people were filing out. I hung back, letting the majority go through first so that I wouldn't be stuck in tight spaces. Across no man's land, I saw a friend, @my-burnt-city (thankfully dressed in a furious pink dress, so easy to spot) also saying goodbye to the space. We clocked each other, and without a word, we both practically ran into a tight, emotional hug.

As we left, we got one final drink from the crate room water cooler (best water in show) and went around the crate room toasting everything from the best water cooler to Sallie the horse to the 1:1 crate. A final little ridiculous moment shared in this fabulous space.

And that is what makes this particular show so incredible. Not only the perfect gifts of performances and interactions from personal favourites, but the inexplicable understanding that everyone is feeling such similar emotions. That we all fell so deeply in love with everything this show gave us, and as it came to the end, we were supporting each other.

I think I hugged more people in that one show than I have any other combined. I like to think the performers were grateful for our love of them and everything they gave us.

And that's something truly special.

#the burnt city #punchdrunk #immersive theatre #greek mythology #greek myth retelling #tbc #tbc 30 day challenge #final show #24th September 2023 #Holy shit that was long. I'm sorry.#Well done for sticking it out if you're still here reading the tags

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gaydogmarriage · 4 months

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#like a fucking idiot i keep checking on these fics believing this time they might be normal about it and not a single fucking time are they #youd think if people can grasp 'vagina doesn't make you a woman' they wouldn't struggle with 'birth doesn't make you a mother' but nope #thats apparently a super advanced logic leap that doesnt fucking occur to these people #the title of father is a special unique title only given to people who nutted in their partners if you've got different anatomy sorry you'r #stuck with mom mother mommy mama forever <3 because that's what you are no matter your lived reality #and like whatever if an mpreg writer cant be assed to do trans rep and wants to bend over backwards to justify why in this au or with this #species their blorbo is cis men can carry i'd still say read the fucking room about the gendering but i'm not getting the pitchforks #but jesus christ if you make the deliberate choice to make your character trans and put it in trans tags maybe consider trans people will b #reading it and won't appreciate a misgendering jumpscare #god this fandom is so shitty to trans men

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illithiddies · 4 months

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The bg3 fandom is so big and active rn I can't imagine there aren't at least a few servers out there that put like... a reasonable limit on the sort of dark content that can be discussed in it while still also allowing nuanced and mature discussion about it, especially considering the game's canon topics.

It's such a bizarre delicate balance but there has to be something right?

#im planning on sticking to a couple of my nonbg3 friends servers that invited me to talk abt bg3 in them #and the tiny little sprinting server I made a bit ago #but I know I'm going to chomping at the fucking bit to talk abt bg3 way more than anyone wants me to I think 😭#like. Only large and fandom specific servers really fill that niche but god are they always a minefield #the sheer whiplash of going from the happiness of watching the award show to like #isolating myself and now wondering if I'm going to finish ANY of my projects anymore still has me reeling #I'm just. tired man. i already did this with star wars. i don't want to do it again already here #i feel like fandom spaces love celebrating trauma survivors but only if you're one of the cool acceptable ones #if you're one of the ones that has dodgy reactions to things and complex unpredictable feelings then its just. oops!#sorry bestie no space will ever truly allow you to feel safe OR accepted. have fun walking that tightrope for the rest of your life #tbf i didn't even give the bg3 server im in the option but I already know how server-destroying this issue is #sorry to anyone who bothered to read this afhshdh it feels so much safer to rant in the tags #questlog

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catgirledteach · 6 months

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tw suicide and spoilers for the finale

i'm really trying to see the positive in the finale but it just sits sour in my stomach. again i dont want to get bogged down completely by izzy's death as there was so much else in the finale that i genuinely loved, but this event really gets to me for a specific reason

as someone who has dealt with suicidal thoughts in the past i am genuinely upset if this is how izzy's story ends. and even more upset that it seems to be framed as 'meant to be' and 'simply unavoidable.' the first three episodes REALLY drove home izzy's belief that he had nothing to live for - he wanted to die and he very explicitly tried to kill himself. and i was glad they portrayed that at the time and even more encouraged when in episodes 4 through 7 it seemed like he was recovering mentally and emotionally. he was portrayed as having found purpose beyond serving someone who didn't love him back, accepting parts of himself he was previously ashamed of, getting support from people around him, etc. it truly was reading to me like an incredible portrayal of someone finally valuing their own life that they had been so ready to throw away before now

and then all of the sudden in the finale it feels like all of that is ripped away. he repeatedly says he doesn't care if he dies, that he's ready to go, and it all feels so upsetting considering where he started the season. and yes i can absolutely see the argument that now he was dying for the cause of protecting the legacy of piracy, but was he though? was that necessary for them to all escape? and more importantly does that change the fact that izzy was still completely ready to put his life in danger again for the sake of other people's safety? part of the comfort of found family is also learning to value your well-being and safety the same way those around you do, at least to me. and his lines about being surrounded by family ring incredibly hollow when the family surrounding him doesn't seem to be upset by his willingness to sacrifice himself for no particular reason.

as someone who is in a far better place than i was two or even one year ago, this hurt and it hurt deeply and a story that once felt like a safe space is one i no longer feel like i can trust. even if a third season comes out (and at this point i think i would still watch it if it came out) i can no longer relax when watching because i can no longer have faith that there will be a happy ending for characters i believe deserve one.

olu says the line about jim in episode three, 'we're best friends. family. someone i'd like to see grow old just like all my other friends.' to me this means i want to see my friends, my family, die in peace in their own time. the audience is watching a supposedly comforting romcom and one would assume they want to see the family that's been built onscreen have happy endings. i know it may sound extreme but it feels like a betrayal. personally it felt like the story was telling me, 'this is the only way it could have ended for izzy. he wanted to die because he was convinced he would never live happily and in the end he was right,' and luckily i'm at a point now where i refuse to believe that's true. that someone can go so far down their path of self hatred that the only way for their story to end is in their untimely death. and in a way i'm glad that i'm as upset as i am because it means i do not buy into that narrative for myself. i still value every other positive lessons and introspection this show has given me, but this is certainly a misstep that i don't know if i can ever truly forgive, and it has certainly tainted the story forever for me.

#if you're also upset i'm sorry #if you also interpret all of this differently that's totally cool and i recognize that my views are not universal #but if you are upset i encourage you to do whatever you need to do to process aside from taking out your negative emotions on others #log off if you need block any tags you need to block don't feel obligated to engage #i may or may not respond to any responses to this post and i hope anyone reading or responding understands that #be well friends and take care of yourselves #and whatever happens next with ofmd i am still so grateful for the friends ive made through this fandom and the happy moments had before no #and i plan to still hold on to those even if some of yall have to take a break for a while i get it and i'll be here #tw suicide #ofmd #ofmd spoilers #i might delete later

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jackshiccup · 8 months

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hi there! sorry for such the long ask, but as someone who was super into Hijack/ROBTD back into 2012-14 time (was ripped away from tumblr for several years bc of home trauma) seeing blogs like yours still active literally sends waves of nostalgia wash over me - i’ve been scrolling through your blog seeing all these new and old posts from nearly 10 years ago, seeing active Hijack fanartists/writers and ROBTD weeks still going on (when i used to be part of them im 2013/14) has genuinely brought tears into my eyes. i’m 23 now and just going on here has healed a part of 13 year-old me who was ripped away from this comfort. so what i really wanted to say is, thank you and i wish you all the joy, happiness and love in the world <3

oh my gosh please don't apologize, thank you for sending such a sweet message !! believe or not i'm actually in the exact same boat as you so it warms my heart so much knowing i'm not the only one going through extreme levels of nostalgia visiting the hijack / frostcup (is this what they're called these days) fandom again... if i think too hard about how much i've missed it my stomach starts hurting bc i have so many memories of robtd from when i was 13 too 🤧

i hope you're doing much better these days. i'm beyond glad i was able to provide you with some comfort through this silly blog ;; (maybe i would even suggest re-watching the movies for maximum comfort hehe) again, thank you so much for sending an ask, you made my night. i'm also wishing you love and happiness and that more parts of you are healing :)🌷<3!!

#i actually only recently made this blog (4 days ago i believe..) so that i would have somewhere to channel and voice out my love for hijack #and in hopes to find the 5 other people that are still into them #so it was such an unexpected but welcoming surprise to see all the new art and stories i've missed #please enjoy your stay <3 !!!! we're genuinely in this together #ask #jackshiccup ask #anonymous #if you're still up to it and if you haven't already you should read of the northmost winds and skies #bc it's what got me back in here and i have no regrets aksdhjadkjf #woah the tags got long i'm sorry..

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daz4i · 1 year

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if i may complain for a bit about something that doesn't actually matter and can be easily avoided. god i hate fics that baby-fy chuuya

#yeah yeah i know just don't read them w/e. there's no tags to avoid these unfortunately 😐#it kinda feels like a fanon of fanon. it's so far removed from his canon self even if some core elements are there.#why write him like a 15 y/o even as an adult. and the thing is. even when he was 15 in canon he wasn't this childish. c'mon.#a lot of the most popular skk fics have him characterized like this and man I'm tired. look how they massacred my boy.#ok complaining session over. i feel like i sound kinda mean. sorry abt that.#it doesn't actually matter that much just a bit frustrating when it keeps happening when you're already a couple hundred words into a fic #edit: i lied I'm not done complaining i gotta turn this into a rant bc ppl misunderstanding my favorite character online is a crime.#childish was the wrong word for me to use ig it's more like. innocent.#girl. bestie. he has been part of criminal organizations quite literally since he remembers himself.#he is not some sweet uwu baby who's a bit of a tsundere or w/e. he's got genuine reasons to be angry yknow. he's been through shit #and he's not innocent? he's in the fucking mafia lol we literally see him kill like 20 people in 5 minutes at 15 y/o.#he's not naive either???? he may not be dazai levels of smart but he's still capable of figuring things out himself????#like he did figure out rimbaud's thing by himself. he's not stupid or slow. he wouldn't be a mafia executive otherwise.#and that's also the reason he can't be naive like... he is in constant danger after all #and idk watering down all this^ for aus is boring and turning him into practically an oc but it's even worse in canonverse #or literally any au where he suffers the same amount as he does in canon. bc then what's your excuse for watering him down.#it feels like forcing him into this very clear cut mold you see in every media when he is literally. not that.#no one in bsd is honestly that's part of its charm imo. they all subvert your expectations of their character archetypes #i think this is why it's making me so angry bc it doesn't feel like just misunderstanding the character but also the whole story. in a way.#am i going too far? perhaps. i dunno. i do feel less Dirty after letting out this frustration tho.#complaining session is now officially over okay. yes. sorry. i don't mean to offend anyone sorry if i sound mean at any point.

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doctorslove · 2 years

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i could be literally getting married to someone and i'd still call alec hardy my soulmate and love of my life

#the way i've lowkey disappeared from here and come back only to be insane for a bit and leave again #i'm sorry i just don't have any motivation to write requests :((#if you've sent me one and i haven't written it i'm sorry i know it's been too long #idk if i will tbh :(#i hope i will get some motivation back and do write them at some point #ily all this blog has been my safe place this whole time #i think it's been a year since i made it #and i was going through it during this period #and being here helped so much #i was just making a post about alec and now in the tags i'm writing a fucking letter #i'm not leaving the blog or anything #but it's obvious i haven't been active at all lately #and idk when i will be really active again #that's all #if you're still reading lmao i hope you're having the most beautiful weekend #back to the point. i really fucking love alec #he's special to me in a way no one else can ever be!

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oasatelematics · 2 years

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the secret actually good "they both die at the end" that lives in my head

#little more than halfway through now #and the writing style is still cringe #like I'm sorry but you can't convince me this is what the internal monologue of a teenager sounds like #the references to pop culture/social media and use of slang feel so forced #and with every page silvera seems to just dump beloved memories of the main characters on us as if to say #look! look how Human they are! they loved their family! feel Connected to them! be Sad that they'll die!#like I love the concept and the idea but the execution is just so mid and lukewarm that it's a miracle I even feel attached #to the characters at all #feel like my writer friends could write this book much better don't @ me im right #my writer friends if you're reading this I know you'd make me insane if any of you had written this instead I just know it #anyway. it's like a generous 6/10 so far. very generous #vegan.txt #this is goodreads for me btw this is where my book reviews will go if I ever write any more #straight into the tumblr post tags

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lighttailoring · 2 months

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#i shall make a tag post and then delete it #it has been very. healing. recently #to see people with body types vaguely similar to mine (mine is of course sans brutal fitness regime and/or minor plastic surgery)#and say “they are hot”#especially kristen coming out and saying she wants a moustache and a happy trail #and more importantly people being into that????????#i was a 00s teen i used to have a wishlist of surgeries and treatments i thought i 'needed' in order to be attractive enough to exist #now i'm like: oh this 'abnormally high' testosterone level? i just had it lying around #maybe i don't need to force my body into the Woman Checklist in order to be happy #maybe i need to do the opposite #maybe my discomfort with being 'trans' was a transmedicalist view #like no i don't Need Surgery And Hormones #in fact i need the opposite #still not cis! because my birth cert says 'female' and my body and brain do not agree #it's just complicated i guess because: i very much also wanted to be Female but i wanted that in order to be Normal?#anyway idk what i'm even getting at any more. if you're still reading this i'm sorry

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vraska-theunseen · 2 months

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i started watching a youtube video about cinemasins that just kind of mocks it for yknow being a content machine and whittling media criticism down to incredibly simple superficial observations like "this things has tropes/cliches" (not even mentioning how a lot of times those tropes and cliches are literally just. customs. things people do in real life, cultural details that someone would include in a story because again real people write things and they live in the fucking world. wearing all black to a funeral for example i remember they called that a cliche a lot) or "the director made choices" or "this thing is in a genre and has scene decoration fit to the genre or meant to convey meaning to the viewer!" like those are bad things instead of how you tell stories and by and large depreciating the ability of its viewers to conduct media analysis and watch things genuinely and appreciate art and meaning. okay the youtuber didn't say all of that specifically a lot of that is my opinion based on how in middle school i watched cinemasins a lot and observations i've made about people the same age as me who i can surmise also watched cinemasins based on how they watch movies and nitpick things like "this thing has tropes" and "this thing would never happen in real life/a person would never say or do this in real life" because cinemasins has distilled in them a lack of ability to engage in a story as a story crucially i cannot say it simpler than that as a story as a narrative someone wrote based on an idea they had because it was cool or to do something or mean something or have an effect and everything that happens is written by someone or a choice made by an actor because these aren't real people and the purpose of art is to AUUUGHHH I GOT DISTRACTED AGAIN!!!! THE POINT OF THIS POST IS i was watching the video and being like haha yeah hate those guys and then they played a clip from cinemasins to demonstrate what they meant and hearing the cinemasins guy's voice knocked me flat i had to pause the video and come write this post bc i had to recuperate

#you might think i'm being dramatic or ohh it's not all cinemasins fault and you're right hypothetical person it's not but its indicative of #a wider lack of ability to engage with art and understand that when you read or watch something it's to experience art. and not think about #whether it would happen in real life. or the logistics or chances of a precipitating event happening. when an action hero makes a shot he #shouldn't be able to make it's because it's a story and it was a stroke of luck that propels him through and it's because we all want to see #him make the shot and most importantly it's because someone wrote it to happen that way. when a character survives something you think they #shouldn't be able to it's not because they have 'plot armor' it's not 'unrealistic' it's because it was written that way to tell a story. i #could just keep going on like this foreverrrr sorry i'm just repeating the same stuff it just annoys me to no end and i see and hear so much #of it from people all the time on and offline and there's no use arguing about it bc i'll be like 'it's like that because it's a story and #someone came up with it. it's art meant to convey themes or meaning it's a story' and they'll be like 'well i don't like it so it's bad' and #im like. sometimes i really wish i could reach into someone's skull and squeeze their fucking brain goop #AND (i forgot how i started my series of tags) A LOT OF IT IS STILL CINEMASINS FAULT!#alex talks

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