#ill be posting up the vid after this

[skitskatdacat63]

Okay finally posting my pics from when I went to Hanger-7 on Saturday July 1st !!

RB9 🥹

STR3 !!!

RB16B

RB7

Various Red Bull-Saubers(including Kimi's first F1 car!!!)

Tbh I think seeing these cars was more surreal and insane to me than going to the actual race the very next day. I think it's because I'm more deranged about the 2010s than nowadays(for the most part), so seeing all these incredibly iconic cars in the flesh(especially ones like the STR3 and Hungry Heidi) was just unbelievable to me. And the fact that it's free entry as well??? Yeah yeah, feel free to waltz into our aircraft hanger, free of charge, and witness these spectacles of engineering 🥱

#as i said it was just super surreal to be standing next to those cars after seeing so many pics and watching so many vids of them #like ??? im standing next to seb's first gp winning car ???? #im standing next to seb's 2nd wdc winning car rn????? #(ALSO OMG SEEING BOTH MARK AND SEB'S NAMES ON THE RB7 HEHEHEHE FOREVER IMMORTALIZED TOGETHER) #im standing next to *the* 13x race winner 4th wdc winning Hungry Heidi rn?????????????????? #like the fact that they had (i think) 4 championship cars just there is insane to me #(also shhhhh i dont know which chassis they have obv so dont be like 'well actually!' to me) #no rb6 tho :( which is a shame bcs thats my fav rb car but god so many other favs so its okay #actually i think they had rb6 but in a different livery so i only have like one pic of it #but anyways i guess its also just more surreal than the gp bcs i was standing so close and getting to appreciate it all #whereas the gp was more of an experience and a really really insane thing to go to and experience rather than appreciate more finely ig? #but yeah do you guys like when i say ill post pics soon and then dont do so until 10 days later? #tbf i just didnt want to post them on the race wknd...but now its almost the race wknd again #btw they had some more cars. i think the rb10 and rb13? but the ones i posted are all my babies yknow #hahaha wait for my course we're supposed to write reflections(in german my god) abt some places we visited right? #and ill do them i swear i swear but like my brain was pretty useless at trying to write that much german while doing so much else #so the only one ive ended up writing was abt going to hanger 7 and how unglaublich it was and it was basically just a rant #omg also!! i have a pic w hungry heidi !!!! (and rb16b boycar ofc) #its so funny bcs basically until the day of i was unsure if i was going to see this alone bcs the guy who ended up going w me was unsure #so id just constantly daydream abt what it would be like to have to ask a stranger to take a pic of me with rb9 #but luckily my friend did! but god no way was i leaving that hanger without taking a pic with at least one beloved #red bull racing #f1 #formula 1 #formula one #rb9 #catie.rambling.txt #rb7 #str3 #rb16b

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#me for like 22yrs of my life: god. get me tf outta the midwest. i hate it here #me flying home after 3yrs living in the desert: oh fuck. HOLY FUCK. its fucking green yall!!!! im losing my mind. HOW SO GREEN????!!!! #literally everytime i fly home im like: holy shit every town is like. in the woods. im gonna cry. that so beautiful #bc im a sap lol. its true tho! its crazy. and it's so fucking green here its beautiful #im so desperate to leave the desert. i really wanna go to school somewhere in the Appalachian mountains tbh #god its so nice to be home. we'll see if i acutally post less bc i might actually b happy for a bit haha. or i might post more nature #stuff bc ill be like: yo look how awesome the world is. ya kno? #my mum is super into rock collecting so i come home and shes like: yo lets watch YouTube vids of ppl rock collecting and im like omg i lov #this. ppl sharing their lov of geology and pretty rocks 😭 and my parents r like hey if u get the summer off bc ur funding runs out and ur #between programs u can come home and we can do some traveling in our camper! we can go to the UP and down to the gray fossil site. bc i #cant shut up abt paleontology lol. my parents r so good 😭😭😭 #im so excited to see the lake and go to the museum and we're gonna visit my old prof in my college town and he does quantitative models so #like he doesn't get a ton of students enthusiastic abt his work and he really started me out on my path. so like. im paying my respects 🙏 #hopefully all goes well lol. im also gonna snipe some samples from a state park and mail them back to school. which should be neat #sigh... anyway im just happy for now and theres so much cool stuff in the world #and yet for some reason i canoot sleep. despite the fact i woke up at 3.30am yesterday so that i could travel for like 11hrs #im too awake now #i want it to be morning! #also shout out to my nose that apparently does not work. like thr dogs got sprayed by a skunk yesterday morning and i do not smell it #its so weird. i dont kno why. i can smell other things. i just cant smell this? idk ive long suspected my sense of smell is awful #and i guess this confirms it. everytime my boss is like: do u smell this??? im like: lol no. what r u talking abt? #that's prob why im so picky. everything is bland 😵‍💫 bc i cannot taste that much #unrelated #lol i slept like 3hrs and now my brain is like hmmm that enough of that lol #also wtf not that many ppl were wearing masks in the airport. u hate to see it

[philyaoi]

mr. pote please explain shoe ig story for the ignorant (me)

not much to explain other than. dan posted an instagram story of their shoes pressed together

ok i guess ill share a LITTLE context. around late january to early february 2023 was when dan was having a mini-break from touring for philly's bday before he had to hit the road for the non-uk european shows. the thing is, there were kind of a lot of complications happening wrt tickets, especially problems surrounding the iceland show, which dan had hyped up as where he was going to end the tour, and pj even mentioned on stream that he and sophie would possibly meet dan and phil there and have essentially a double date holiday! the day before the Shoe Pic, dan had announced that the iceland show was cancelled. he posted the cancellation on his story in icelandic, here is the english translation:

Sorry for the frozen people. Couldn't bring this show to your island this trip, that's all I can say for now. It's on my bucket list to be with you one day. I'll see you then.

he then posted an ig story where he seemed to be out on a walk that was quite self-deprecating on the fact that no one takes him seriously "in life, business, or the industry." it was just a bummer day for dan. so a few twitter phannies (back when there was a Little peace) thought to make an encouraging hashtag for dan, #weloveyoudan to show some appreciation for him when he really seemed to need it! (this also spawned an in-joke hashtag my good friend @editingz0ne made, #giveamazingphilnukes, that phil tweeted about 💀)

so the next day, when dnp had both posted while at an apex legends esports competition thing, we all kinda inferred that this was a lil date, possibly as another phil bday present (still his bday week) or as a lil gift to cheer dan up, or both! and then. he posted the fuckin shoe pic.

listen. idk how to explain it. it just. felt like something so weirdly intimate? like, no idea what the context is, other than theyre sitting in the back of a cab and took a photo of their shoes pressed together. and like one is clearly phil's shoe and the other clearly dan's shoe, and i assume theyre the same shoe size (do not tell me wikifeet ppl i dont need to know) and so they just. fit perfectly together. and all this was after the harrowing previous day, and after all that dan just decided to let us in on this picture that is so silly and not really anything and yet feels so personal? its like when we hear their alien language in the texting vids, or that they get fries every saturday and call it "fry-day". like its not a bit its not playing up a dynamic for a camera its just. THEM! its just them!!!!!!!! anyway thank you for coming to my ted talk on the dan and phil shoe photo taken on february 5th, 2023 by dan howell.

#myrambles #phan #i will also reblog relevant ig stories from danandphilupdates in a bit #or you can check all the stories on indepthbants youtube channel and their 2023 playlist #this is like... its so goofy i know but this was back when we were STARVED for content #we were living off instagram stories like phil hadnt even posted a video yet that year #the shoe photo fed us for WEEKS like please appreciate the abundance of content we get from them now #and if we were starving in 2023 you cannot even imagine 2020 dude #i wasnt even around but i can just tell phannies who went thru 2020 have a haunted look in their eyes

[angel-gone-south]

Stan Marsh/Feminine!GN!Reader:

Shitfuck Downtown [2]

cw: emeto, alc ment, alcoholism ment

【☆】★【☆】

marshman: ur on my shit list @donovangetslaid

【☆】★【☆】

Monday hit you like a ton of bricks. Or a sock full of cold butter going at mach twenty. Or something else very hard and fast and painful.

You did remember to doll up all cute: tights, striped stockings and a matching long sleeve, graphic tee over that, and a spunky short skirt. You wore a couple of kandi bracelets, a choker and a silver chain, with all of your piercings color coordinated to the outfit. You’d even gone through the trouble of painting your nails, doing your makeup and washing your hair. Red walked in the room just as you finished.

“Ready?” She jangled her keys in her hand.

“It’s still early?”

“I need Bebe. And coffee. But mostly Bebe.”

Tweek Bros. was your cousin’s favorite place, so you weren’t surprised. She and Bebe sat in the front, while you and Heidi sat in the back, chittering about what kind of coffee you liked.

【☆】★【☆】

Despite the coffee run, you got to school just in time to dramatically flop in a seat before the bell rang. The ever beautiful and blonde transgender queen Marjorine Stotch sat next to you.

“Tired today? Stay up all night thinking about boys, did ya?” She teased. With Marjorine, it was always easy to tell when she was joking.

“Yeah yeah. Had the wettest dreams of my life.” You rolled your eyes playfully as class started.

【☆】★【☆】

The whole day you felt these burning eyes on you, like someone was trying to explode your head with their mind.

Only once did you catch them- at lunch time. It was Stan, as you’d come to learn. He raced from his seat to the bathroom and you took your leisurely time following him, and you caught him coming out of it.

“Why do you puke when you see me?” There was a hint of teasing in your voice. “Wendy says that means you think I’m pretty.”

“Ohh hahahaha about that- uhm-…” He shuffled awkwardly. “Is it bad to say yes?”

“Nope.” You popped the p, yanking a piece of paper from your pocket and slipping it in his hands. “Text me. Let’s hang, okay, Stan?”

After you left, Stan was still stood there, dumbfounded.

“I think I’m gonna hurl again.”

【☆】★【☆】

marshman: stan dubs⁉️‼️⁉️

kyle_brof: wym?

mccockmick: no fkn way u did not

marshman: i sooo did. their snap n their numbr and everything guys

cartmanbrah: sheeit! no way!

kyle_brof: do NOT puke on them

cartmanbrah: if u do can i post it

donovangetslaid: PUKE RIZZ GUYS

mccockmick: PUKE RIZZZZZZ

【☆】★【☆】

donovangetslaid: gonna go get in a fight ill post the vid

donovangetslaid: man i got my ass beat i ain’t posting that shi 💀

spacecasecraig: @donovangetslaid 🤡🤡

【☆】★【☆】

#south park x y/n #south park #south park fanfiction #south park gay #south park x reader #south park x you #stan x reader #stan marsh x y/n #stan marsh x reader #stan marsh x you #sp stan marsh #stan marsh #emeto #➳ Mail’s In!♡

[danandphilplay]

i need to catch up with all the recent uploads its been a busy week! if they do post again ill be surprised bc theres been a lottt of content lately especially with the final wad shows. im excited for tomorrow as someone who hasn’t seen wad before:>

#dan and phil #amazingphil #dan howell #dan and phil games #dapg #dapgames #dan and phil poll

[plaqying]

sweetheart headcanons

sweetheart headcanons bc im relistening to milo's playlist for the hundredth time

sugar mommy/daddy/parental figure. they are definitely rich, and constantly buys stuff for the pack

raging mommy issues, but has the worlds best dad (basically the opposite of milo)

knows how to pole dance. dont even ask

enjoys horror games like mortuary assistant, silent hill and dead space, but loves games like sally face, fran bow, undertale, ddlc (they are yet to trick milo into playing this), omori and nso (idk what horror genre youd call this)

asked marie for help when they wanted to get better at healing

was 100% a fandom kid, specifically ddlc and undertale (self-projecting rn)

was a "pleasure to have in class"

is still scared of losing milo after inversion, which is why they like listening to his heartbeat cuz it reminds them that he's still there (someone commented this on the sleep aid vid and i cried)

was so happy when they met sam cuz it meant they werent the only empowered non shifter at pack meetings/solstices there

good at every single video game except minecraft. angel tried to get them to play it and they immediately fell off a cliff or something

gifted kid burnout

can only cook mac n cheese. other than that theyre almost as bad as asher

their mom was allergic to cats and they were never let near any, and got very excited when they met aggro since he was one of the first cats they had seen in a long time

always covered in cat fur

david is scared of them and they find it hilarious

the only one of the mates who actually met gabe (this is actually canon but whatever)

sometimes they'll explain empowered stuff to angel and babe, like how the department works and stuff

fully explained the covert thing asher got in trouble for to babe (they didnt explain how his name mysteriously disappeared from DUMPS list tho)

they kick absolute ass with babe playing just dance

contantly takes the piss outa milo and sams accent

really tall (same height as ash)

thats all i can think of rn, ill probably come up with more and post them separately, but i just wanted to get these idea out quickly before i forget about them

remember to not take any of this seriously, and that its all just my opinions and thoughs

luv u x

#redactedverse #redacted audio #redacted milo #milo greer #milo #redacted sweetheart #headcanon

[alostlittleriverlotus]

i wanted to find some information to help my friend understand their own narcissism. Yeah. I forgot that everything I would see was ableist bs about "narcissistic parents" and "narcissism" in the form of meaning toxic abuser. Actually fucking done. I just wanted to help find answers for my fucking friend since they struggle with understanding themselves, but nope. I love that the ONLY resource is diagnostic materials. That's great. Until you wish to understand things fucking better.

I hate people that perpetuate this idea. I got through a whole vid about toxic ass men and shit only to use the term narcissistic to describe them after calling them delusional. I fucking hate this shit. Misogynistic men are not narcissistic!!! They're entitled and it is society that has allowed such entitlement where they don't HAVE to think of others. It is not a fucking narcissistic thing or narc abuse or shit like that!

I'm just fucking mad and done. I hate having barely any resources for help. I hate that I can't even help my friend esp since their narcissism is very different from mine. I hate that even finding official stuff and diagnostic material, you will also run into tons of shit about narcissistic abuse.

Fuck people that believe in narcissistic abuse. Fuck people that won't fucking listen when we be nice and try to tell them otherwise. Fuck people that insist upon using these mental health terms as fucking insults especially for right wingers and other shitty people. Fuck. You.

I give plenty of posts that try to nicely explain and help people fucking understand, but nah. I just. I fucking cant. I'm fucking angry and pissed lately especially some of the people I've run into on here just searching through the tags. I hate how many people use those terms because they're unaware and just see a fancy term come up. I hate that so many people act like "narcissistic abuse" is a real thing. It isn't. Mental disorders are not fucking linked to abuse. If other mentally ill people demonize us, it's the same fucking stigma that some people still believe in and used to say a lot for such other mental illnesses. I hate how fucking "narcissistic abuse" actually affects trauma victims. The ones that are kept mad, kept paranoid, kept scared, kept on edge, kept defensive. The ones that are narcissistic and womt even realize it. Cause I was fucking there when I fell into narcissistic abuse shit. And all it fucking did was make me more toxic and more defensive and worsened my fucking symptoms. Cause narcissistic abuse doesn't help with healing. Naming abusers as narcissists or narcissistic or the abuse as narcissistic does not help you fucking heal. It's just a term, a label, that has no actual standing other than to promote the same fucking demonized stereotypes every neurodivergent person has faced.

Even if you're one of the "better" ones or you claim "narcissist doesn't always mean narcissistic personality disorder" then here. There are people that will call us demons, say we are possessed. There are people that will insist it DOES mean the disorder. There are people that WILL consider us abusive for just saying we have NPD. There will be people comparing us to rapists and child sex offenders and murderers (that was fun to experience as someone that has experienced csa.) There will be people insisting NPD is NOT EVEN A REAL DISORDER. You cannot insist that these things don't happen and it doesn't mean it or whatever other bullshit there is. You cannot say you're listening only to get defensive back and ignore the points made.

I'm just. Fucking done. And I'm not here to fucking listen to people who hate narcissists or believe in narc abuse. You can fucking learn and listen or just fucking shut up and leave. Cause all the do is end up fighting and refusing to see the other side. And I have been there, I DID fall into that hole and called my parents narcissists. All it fucking did was make me angrier and more hateful. If your response from joining a community is to want to hurt narcissists (as articles often suggest) then that is NOT the kind of community you should want to be in.

I'm just fucking tired. Of YouTubers I watch talking as if they know so much only to demonize the fucking mentally ill and use disorders I fucking have and symptoms I experience as insults. Of everyone falling into the idea of believing narcissists are inherently toxic. Every mentally ill person is by that logic and maybe they are, cause we cannot fucking be healthy in an expected way, cause we will always have issues whether it's the more "accepted" ones people know of like depression or anxiety or ocd or whether it's the "scary" ones like schizophrenia, personality disorders, DID. I'm sick of this shit so yeah. I'm not here to listen to people that want to try to defend the idea of narc abuse.

That shit won't help you heal with your trauma. It just continues your fucking trauma responses.

I'm tired and fatigued and hungry so whatever. But I'm angry and I fucking hate that I feel like I have to "justify" being angry. I hate that I have to be terrified of the response due to me having also a bad history of internet harassment so I'm generally terrified of fucking posting anything, even if it's the silliest and dumbest shit.

Fucking leave narcissists alone. Fucking stop acting like we are some evil monsters. Just shut up about narc abuse.

#narcissistic #narcissist #narcissistic abuse #narc abuse #narcissism #surviving narcissism #narcissistic personality disorder #actually narcissistic #npd safe #npd traits #cluster b safe #narcissistic personality disorder atte #narcissists #npd #actually npd

[its-koili]

hey guys. sorry for being gone for so long. heres an update

(tw for: mention of violence / gore, general distress, mental health issues)

(tw below)

.

basically i had a huge mental health crisis. i was having 24/7 constant rolling panic attacks from may of 2023 to january of this year. my last big meltdown was in early february. been processing a lot of CSA trauma and some recent trauma that ive gone through. i think i talked about my panic attacks before leaving social media but idk i dont remember. isolated myself from absolutely everybody.

the main thing that made me leave was that while i was keeping up to date on the g3n0c1d3 (censoring bc idk how tumblr is about it), and when i was looking in the replies / related of the awareness videos, i came across 4 accounts dedicated to using gore for clicks / shock. not videos of the g3n0c1d3 (thank god bc of how they were using the vids) but of unfortunate every day situations and cam footage. like, the kind of stuff you could see on liveleak back in 2010. just out in the open on twitter. they all had usernames like "(insert number here) ways to die)". they were all content farms for click/ad revenue. it was too much it was a huge trigger and i had a full on meltdown. the bluecheck ppl on twitter were using the replies of the videos people uploaded for raising awareness to upload mindless g0re for money. the fact that peoople have 0 compassion for human life sent me into a spiral that i couldnt get out of. (i reported 3 out of the 4 accounts i was able to and 3 got taken down but 1 is still up and it odesnt seem to be uploading the hardcore g0r3 anymore. so thats good. but that was one of the reasons i left social media. ive been keeping up to date w the news but thats it. i left my socials entirely and ive only been on my phone to look up recipes or to use my computer for media research groceries and gaming and shows

that was the main thing that pushed me to leave. i just couldnt take it anymore. during the start of my crisis last year, i was planning on taking a small break, but all of that pushed me over the edge and i dropped everything. after that, my issues got worse and i dont remember most of it. thankfully. but i couldnt bring myself to talk to anybody. i isolated myself and just. laid in bed. but im doing better so i guess thats good

on another topic ive beeen nervous to post this on main but during all of this (ive talked abt tihs a little bit on my priv before i left) i found out that im a system a long while back. my dad (one of my abusers) had/has DID and it terrified me to think that i could be anything like him. i also knew cereal abuser who pretended to be a system to get away with stuff/abusing their friends (and then years later admitted that they werent a system and siad that systems are fake.) LOTS of tears. lots of crying over this. was in denial for a few weeks. cried some more. then eventually came to terms with it.

i dont want to post abt my system online too much bc i dont want to act like this is some fun trendy thing bc its not. it makes day to day living very hard (some lighter/funnier issues that make it hard are: arguing with an alter bc YOU dont know where THEY put YOUR MEDS, not being able to cook because one alter can and the other cant, your art style not being consistent because their styles are different). i dont want to really make it a massive part of my identity online bc its not a big deal! theres just Multiple Little Guys in my brain. so. im a system! im the same but....this explains why i dont remember talking to certain people SUIDHUFHX. i always felt bad. makes conversing with online friends hard especially if icons/usernames are changed. ill make a separate post about this someday thatll go into detail a bit more.

i went years thinking it was just "kinning" but it wasnt lol. it turns out that your personality completely shifting, tastes in food / music / art / media changing, the way you walk / talk dress changing, and having complete memory blackouts when you """"kin shift"""" isn't normal. /lh (dw ive had a lot of time to come to terms with this)

but basically right now ive been spending time getting to,,know myself?? iive been using simplyplural for myself for several months and im uncovering a lot of my memories / trauma ect bc alters can write down what they need to in the chat. so i can go back later and read it. its been v helpful!

i will not be coming back just yet. i have no interest in using social media rn or drawing or writing unfortunately. ive been working on my original stuff here and there but i havent been drawaing fandom stuff bc im not hyperfixating on a fandom.

also. some things have come up. im not going to say anything until the party in question is stable/safe/comfortable before i even suggest anything for context (i dont plan on talking abt anything at all unless they start talking publicly). right now i am helping someone through abuse. their wellbeing is my #1 concern. i'll think about other things after im sure theyre okay.

i dont really have any resolutions as to how things are going but i do feel better and im not having as many panic attacks. i dont really know where im going with this now sorry. just trying to brush over the basic topics before i go. idk if anybody remembers me bc ive been gone for so long so idk if im just talking into the wind but if i am thats fine honestly this is helping me reorganize my thoughts (i type these vents out a lot on docs so i probably wont remember posting this hiudhvu)

other than that. i dont draw or write anymore. i think in the past 6 months ive drawn like....5 things. its. weird. im completely disconnected from fandoms now. coming up to a full year of not having a hyperfixation at all.

my bday was on the 6th. im 27 now im very old (everybody forgot it asides from my husband (and the people he reminded) n my abuser). ive been trying to cook and bake more and ive been playing video games again. planning on getting back into drawing soon and working on my original stuff. when i come back im planning on redesigning my profiles and updating my social media bios and stuff bc theyre so old. also ill make a section on my carrd for my system. there you go theres some positivity to the update nxfjdfjh. sorry if i dont seem very enthused im very tired so typing has been a chore hfuidshuifv.

sorry that this was a lot or if it seems disjointed i was trying to put down as much into this as possible without making it too long

bye!!! see u all soon!

#vent

[henrysglock]

Salem's lot possible by king inspo for tfs? Was watching a vid about it and it has random things (very similar 1980s poster, Ralph/Danny brother dies at 12, becomes vampire, Father Callahan/Father Newby, Marsten House/Creel House, "original evil" haunting of house tied to csa) that just remind me of the creels, was curious if you had any thought abt the show or book

So sorry for taking a few weeks to get to this, Nonnie!! This time I actually have a reason for the wait, though: cross referencing.

(This is going to be a long post...)

I definitely think 'Salem's Lot is an inspo for The First Shadow for a few different reasons.

First things first, a lot of 'Salem's Lot is giving ST3 and the flayed, with One as a (supposed) Barlow figure and Will as a Danny type figure carrying on from ST1/2. However, as we know, Will and Henry exist as something of a repetition, and the Creel house does seem to function similarly to the Marsten house at first glance, as you said, with Henry being that era's Danny figure. (I'm going to come back to this later).

We also have some cool visual connections.

First off, like you said, we have the poster (and the book cover for good measure, since there's similarity there too):

Then we have iconic shots from the movie itself being replicated:

A third one comes, however, from a third source: Midnight Mass

As I've talked about before, the church in The First Shadow promo art is a near carbon-copy of the church from Midnight Mass:

There are also a fair number of other similarities. For one, the window silhouettes:

For another, the birds and cats:

(Added context: The TFS leaked audition tapes talk about cats being killed in Hawkins with no known suspect, much the same as the cats being killed on Crockett Island by the "angel" vampire in Midnight Mass.)

Further, the setup of the Midnight Mass rec. center as compared to set pieces for The First Shadow...as compared to the Rainbow Room in NINA:

And, while not strictly related to The First Shadow, there is an interesting detail to note across all three sources. The eyes:

(This also comes through in Annihilation (on the ST4 movie board) when altered Lena and the alien doppelgänger of her husband Kane reunite. Both of their eyes shimmer and glow, much the same way as the monster-fied humans pictured above.)

I bring all this up now in relation to 'Salem's Lot because 'Salem's Lot was a clear inspiration for Midnight Mass, to the point where Flanagan easter-eggs it into the show:

We also have other overlapping references, such as Se7en, which appears both in Midnight Mass and on the ST4 movie board:

So the question we're all asking is "why the tangent about Midnight Mass? How does that tie in, besides being a 6-degrees-of-separation thing."

Here, I'd like to posit a connection between the three: Barlow, Brenner, and Pruitt's Angel.

In Midnight Mass, Father Paul Hill (Msgr. John Pruitt), is a "newcomer" who brings a vampire (read: Angel) to Crockett Island. In truth, he's the missing Msgr. John Pruitt, who was restored to youth by the vampire's blood after an ill-fated trek to Jerusalem (much like 'Salem's Lot's Father Callahan). It is he who does most of the dealing on the vampire's behalf, feeding its blood to his concentration and convincing the people that becoming a vampire is a miracle...all while transforming into a vampire himself.

In 'Salem's Lot, Kurt Barlow is the vampire responsible for Danny's death and turning. He's the newcomer to the Lot who buys the Marsten house and hides within it. He does most of his dealing via Richard Straker, his human familiar.

In The First Shadow, Martin Brenner is a newcomer to Hawkins, establishing his spot in basement of Hawkins National Laboratory. We don't know much about him, but we do know that his later self has a fair amount of vampire coding (not appearing in mirrors, a habit of not dying from things that ought to kill him, etc), as does Vecna, a supposed byproduct of his experimentation. He's also got people who deal on his behalf, such as Connie Frazier and Sam Owens.

I'm not so much saying that Brenner exists as a physical vampire, but perhaps a more figurative one. As you mentioned, Nonnie, vampirism is often used as symbolism of non-consenual acts (see: SA in Bram Stoker's Dracula, CSA in 'Salem's Lot, and grooming in fanatical/fundamentalist church circles in Midnight Mass). They're also used to represent the spread of ideas and practices that are generally thought of as evil or unclean.

Brenner is no different, and his story is far more heavy-handed in this regard.

He may not physically drink blood, but he farms children to to be the figurative (and eventually literal) lifeblood of his scientific endeavors, all of which is possible via abuse of and a fundamental lack of consent from Henry and the children. Brenner may not be feeding on them, but he is feeding on them, if you catch my meaning. And, as we know, Brenner has a penchant for lying and manipulation. He spreads stories that aren't true, that turn people against his victims.

He comes to deliver messages regarding the reliability of the government and the dark underbelly of control and abuse that spreads under the patriot-acclaimed shining goal of "progress", much like Pruitt's fanatical church and its "miracles" that can only end in slaughter, or the blind eye being turned to a predator on the loose in the town of Jerusalem's Lot, in which the steady spread of vampirism denotes the fact that each blind eye becomes complicit in the spread of abuse.

Brenner, then, seems to be both the Barlow and the Pruitt of The First Shadow: A newcomer who does horrific things in pursuit of a selfishly "selfless" goal: scientific progress.

As such, I'd like to alter a conclusion slightly: Both the Creel House and Hawkins National Lab seem to be the Marsten house of Stranger Things, no?

And on that note...

Vecna/One and Brenner seem to exist as two sides of a coin: While Vecna/One literally sucks the life force from his victims, Brenner does so in a more figurative sense. Vecna/One doesn't literally spread lies the way Brenner does (in fact, any lies he might tell are very much contained between himself and his victim), but the way the UD spreads under his control is very much the metaphorical flip-side to that pattern of behavior.

In this respect, they both seem to be Barlows. While Brenner isn't the physical source of the magical terror in Hawkins, he did kidnap a child and through that act corrupt a neutral magical source into what it is today. In this he acts as half of Barlow, with Vecna/One acting as that literal magical source/other half.

Do with that what you will.

#long post #asks #stranger things: the first shadow #stranger things and salem's lot #stranger things and midnight mass #stranger things

[teamdilf]

character hcs for, hmmm.... let's go for solana and garrus please!

Sexuality Headcanon: Solana is bisexual and Garrus is straight.

Gender Headcanon: Cis woman and cis man, respectively.

A ship I have with said character: I ship Solana with James Vega real hard. It sort of happened by accident - in Come Back Alive, James is guarding Lora after he and Jack found her in the rubble and sticks around after Solana and Castis show up to take care of her. Solana is in a rough space emotionally - her brother is lost in space, and her leg is never going to heal right, so she's contending with the realization that her mobility will never be the same. And, then there's the fact that her dad is emotionally constipated and not taking care of his own needs, let alone hers. She needs someone to talk to and James isn't perfect - he sticks his foot in his mouth a lot, but he tries really damn hard. He makes her laugh. He obviously cares so much about Lora, but damn James won't flirt with her the way he flirts with everyone else!

Solana is hurt by this and thinks he's not attracted to her, but the truth is, James doesn't flirt with her because he respects her so much and really likes her. After a chat at the beach, they get on the same level and decide to sneak around, only they're about as discreet as a punch to the face, so Castis figures it out immediately, and helps them keep it quiet.

Garrus? He and Lora were my first Mass Effect OTP.

A BROTP I have with said character: For Solana, I'm going to go with Lora. I think Lora offers a lot of fresh perspective on Garrus, and Solana is grateful that Lora got her and Castis evacuated to her vineyard in Germany towards the end of the war, which wound up saving their lives.

With Garrus, I flout common convention in Shakarian fics and have him becoming really good friends with Kaidan. They're able to get past the awkwardness that resulted because Lora and Kaidan were briefly an item during the events of the first game, and Kaidan acts as Garrus' second-in-command while they're trapped out in space. They really lean on one another, and that sort of trust winds up leading to a close, lifelong friendship.

A NOTP I have with said character: With Solana, I don't think I really have one? I've never seen her shipped with anyone and thought, "oh, that's not for me", honestly.

I think it's the same for Garrus. I don't have any strong opinions in this regard, but maybe Kaidan because they're besties in my canon universe?

A random headcanon: Solana is two years younger than Garrus and partly because Garrus was off doing spirits only knows what at the time, she winds up taking a transfer so she can act as her mother's caregiver. She has a lot of bitterness surrounding this time in her life - she gave up a lot and then never did get the career she wanted back because of her injury during the war. It's something she seeks therapy about post-war, but she rarely speaks of her mother's illness with anyone but James and her therapist. It just hurts too much and she doesn't want to feel bitter and angry at her father and brother.

Garrus really loves the Blasto vids, and he'll claim it's genuine but part of it is because they annoyed the absolute hell out of his father when Garrus was a teenager.

General Opinion over said character: I've always appreciated seeing how people write Solana - we get so little about her in-game so she's a character people are really free to make their own. I also get a kick out of seeing whether she's the older or younger sibling in other people's universes.

I love Garrus and have a lot of appreciation for the unreliable narration we get from him, particularly regarding his actions on Omega. Things like the rest of his crew wanting to bail, and him continuing to push to get more done, because eventually he was always going to piss off the gangs enough for them to bring him down. What happened was unfortunately inevitable and I do personally prefer Garrus coming to see the grey in life and sparing Sidonis.

Also, Castis was right about Garrus and I will die on that hill. Yeah, Castis' manner sucked, but the dude knows his son.

#ask games #thank you! #j's fics #Solana Vakarian #Garrus Vakarian

[tame-a-messenger]

Hey, thanks for taking me submission. I guess it’s not really an ask other than please share your thoughts too! Just have to get something off my chest.

There have been a lot of comments on YT, Reddit and Twitter about Damien not being in as much content and not being listed as Games Producer for the last three videos.

First one is honestly to be expected as he was sick. Second one is interesting. I follow his streams and sometimes watch when he guests on Podcasts. He’s been saying he’ll have more time to stream, he has some major projects coming up and he’s going to create his own content on his own channel.

Some of the community thinks Smosh demoted him because he actually posted about the current events over in Israel/Palestine but I personally think he just wasn’t able to fulfill the role of producer the way he wanted. (Perfectionist - something I find Angela has in common with him.)

Anyway, all this to say, I think Damien is stepping back from Smosh a little. I am hoping it doesn’t mean a reduction of content that he’s in but you never know. I think being responsible for coming up with content in addition to appearing as talent is really hard on his time and he’s reached a limit.

The funeral was a big example of this. To appear in the funeral wasn’t just showing up; many livestreams mentioned rehearsal after rehearsal and attending several writing meetings. I just don’t think he had time.

While I think the halftime show of the funeral with Chanse and Angela was awesome, Damien could have come in and support it or I was thinking he could have showed up as backup for Anthony with his vampire cosplay. It would have been great but I get why he didn’t do it.

Anyway, more damngela content with Sword AF coming in three days!

Thanks for sending in a submission! I love chatting about stuff! keep em' coming!

I've been seeing people talk about Damien not being listed as producer last 3 vids, I've also been hearing whispers of Damien doing more streaming and videos on his own YouTube channel.

I don't think he'll fully leave Smosh anytime soon, maybe he's going to be strictly talent from now on (like how Angela and others are "just" talent, she doesn't produce or direct just shows up to do shoots) I hope he'll do that if anything.

I saw a clip of him from his stream the other day and someone was asking why he wasn't in the funeral roast and he said he was in the audience (not sure if that meant physical on set audience or online audience) watching! I wont lie, also was wanting him to show up in it though :(

I think it'd be great to have Damien as mainly talent! recently he seems more chill so if that because he's taken a step back then I'm all for it! Maybe it'll be like the inverse of what Kimmy did, instead of being talent she became a producer, and maybe he'll become just talent? as long as he stays at Smosh ill be happy :)

Quite honestly I feel like hiring more strictly producers is really good for Smosh and the people on the cast, they say their shoot week is SUPER draining so if its better and healthier for them that's great! Plus having someone solely dedicated to finding and sourcing games for them to play, we'll probably get better content! (something about overworking and echo chambers makes for stale content something something) my point is if they're happy and healthy I'm happy :)

#I swear to god though if he leaves smosh im throwing a fit #him and angela are too much fun to watch for him to leave rn #>:( #damangela #damien and angela #damien x angela #damgela #damngela #damien/angela #damngela dynamic enjoyer

[dethbug]

pls excuse me being sappy as shit but...i cant believe the experience i was so. unbelievably lucky to have yesterday.

one of my close friends, rissi, gifted me a VIP ticket babyklok ((to meet brendon small & gene hoglan))

the ticket was intended for another friend of theirs but said friend got sick and was unable to make it :-( so me getting to go at all was last minute and crazy rushed but one of the best experiences of my life.

i first binged metalocalypse within the span of 2-3 days starting on the first of July and i genuinely didnt have any idea of what i was getting into or just how meaningful it/Brendons work would end up meaning to me

like .. its VERY corny but ive just. never felt so at home with a show, or music, everything about it honestly. but not even that -- brendon himself has inspired me so deeply as an artist/writer , in such a way that i didnt think id ever feel again (in terms of confidence/drive/passion towards chasing after my dream career path of being a writer/animator)

his writing and music has done so much for me at the exact time i needed it most, and its something ill carry w me forever :,-(

i have so much i want to say but i still am struggling to process, ill be posting vids soon, but for now here are my pics with brendon & gene :,-)

i look a lil busted but ITS OKAY. surprise face reveal

i may edit the post and delete the pic later I DUNNO

#i still just. cant believe it #i was at the barricade- front and center the entire show.. #🥲🥲🥲 #bug.txt

[revive-the-fandom]

I remember that I started shipping Snotlout and Fishlegs because of them completing each other but In don't remember what could make them fall for each other: what seduced Fishlegs for Snotlout and what seduced Snotlout for Fishlegs? Especially after Httyd 2 when they fought for Ruffnut?

this was originally way longer but i think ill have to make it its own post at this point

ill admit im a little confused by this one, but if your asking why fishlegs and snotlout might like each other, i think this vid sums it up pretty well

httyd 2 and onwards is a little ... eh. the canon reason via the creators is that fishlegs & snotlout saw ruffnut as their last chance at love since shes the last girl around their age. personally this was really shallow esp since they establish that berk has connections with other tribes in httyd 2 (drago crashes the tribes meeting) and rob/dob had been released already (introducing heather).

i generally ignore the whole snotlout/fishlegs/ruffnut triangle as its not smth im interested in, and i ignore thw and beyond entirely bc to me it disrespects the original movie and most of the complex side characters they had set up. the only consistent character was tuffnut, who is a wildcard anyways.

#asks #anon #reply #thnx for the ask #ill probs post a long fishlout post at some point too

[meiko3323]

Father in her character demo be like:

ok im not by any means a lore theorizer, my brain is much too smooth for that, but every now and then, like a bouncing DVD logo touching a corner, i have a coherent thought. and Arlecchinos demo sparked some which id like to put forth. making it as a text post cuz archons know, i get real wordsy ^^'

spoilers obv if youre not far enough in story.

🔥

🔥

🔥

now. upon several rewatches of the original and reactions, the first non-Arle voiceline jumped out at me:

"A spark cannot shatter all shadows until it sets all ablaze or else to the other end of light lie still bleak shades"

this made me think back to was it Childes or Wanderers voiceline? where they say that given the chance, the Knave would betray the Harbingers if it suited her. so what if, hear me out, in her quest of retribution she seeks to somehow go against the Fatui/ Harbingers/ Tsaritsa? retribution that is, for the myriad suffering theyve caused to innocent ppl around teyvat. idk abt full on taking them down, as the top 3 harbs are said to have power that rivals archons, but mb put a sizeable dent in their forces, or otherwise impede their plans. she also heavily implied a wish to collaborate w us, the Traveller, in the future at several occasions during the Fontaine AQ. mb she wants to enlist our help in her goal. circling back to that line, i think the spark is obv Father, and the shadows she wishes to shatter i strongly believe are the Fatui/ Harbingers. and unlike me, the line after is confidently saying "set ALL ablaze" = complete eradication of that organization.

my next thought was actually aided by a yt comment under one of the recent vids w her (idr if teaser, demo, or short, likely short) that said sth along the lines of "shes not a wolf in sheeps clothing, shes a sheep in wolfs clothing, forced to blend in w the wolves that took her in". this comment popped into my mind as i watched the scene where she is walking in mb some type of dream or mind world, w numerous children running around, playing and singing. and she has such a soft look on her face as she gazes at them. but then she collects herself w her signature 🤫 to flip the switch to ig we can call it her wolf side, and the scene changes to her against the red eclipse moon thing (crimson moon?). where was i going w this?.. i think the fact that her "natural" or innermost state is her sheep side where she just wishes to run the orphanage in peace and be a good mother Father to the children and she has to actively suppress that and channel her wolf side in order to carry out her version of justice, and ofc keep blending in w her adoptive wolves (harbingers) until the time is right.

finally, her last voiceline of the demo struck me as very crucial:

"I hear that the children love to play by the fireplace, so let us continue to use the name, "House of the Hearth". Still... its flame is no longer needed for you have the strength to defend yourselves"

from what i can unpack, this is obv talking abt her leaving her position as orphanage director and passing that torch (heh) to Lyney. which btw goes in line w a theory proposed by ABD Illustrates on yt regarding pyro characters (and jumping off to predict plot of Natlan). ill link it btw, go give it a watch, its very insightful:

anyway. she wants the orphanage to keep its name after her retirement. she feels that the children no longer need her (its flame) as under Lyneys leadership they can fend for themselves. a sad look comes across her face as she says this. i believe shes not as unfeeling/ uncaring and is more attached to the children than she dares to admit, and is pained to leave them behind in pursuit of her greater goals.

oh and going back to the 4.6 patch trailer, the boss battle bw her and her main trio of children - despite her thinking Lyney is fit to take over, she wants to give him one final test ig to reaffirm her decision, and to give him the confidence boost to take up that post. cuz he is very unsure of himself, and is always anxious of disappointing Father and not living up to w/e expectations he believes she has for him.

omg that was a lot. this was prob a solid hour of pure stream of consciousness. hopefully theres some coherent nuggets in there. most of it isnt horribly deep, honestly prob surface level stuff that might be painfully obv to others. but i wanted to write it out nonetheless

i invite anyone that bothered to read these long-winded ramblings to respectfully share their thoughts/ theories in the comments and/ or reblogs. was there anything i missed or forgor?

thank you for your time ^^

ps: the trailer was phenomenal btw OMG - the cinematography, the music?! i cant wait for tnbee to make an epic remix of it. and ofc for real lore theorists to dig in and drop their videos on it o3o

#my art #genshin impact #arlecchino #arlequeeno #my queen #theory #lore theory #analysis #well a half-baked one #i should have used miss not ms. #ah well too late now #am smort #waiting for maint to be over #4.6 is within reach! #soon TM #Youtube

[enmusthighs]

Ugh I can’t believe I’m venting here of all places but I also need to get this out so bad

For context, i haven’t had an irl friend since I was 11. My parents didn’t want me in public school, the stay at home parent couldn’t drive, I was babied and not even trusted to leave the house to walk/bike ANYWHERE without a parent, but I finally did manage to be allowed social media in my late 16’s.

Both friend groups I’ve had online were ones I cared about deeply and they both ended with me realizing they didn’t care about me in return. One I was the oldest of and 80% of the group was 13, but I still got along with them anyways and after a whole year of being the mom friend, the therapist, the “Ill call the police if you don’t throw up all those pills you intentionally OD’d on because I’m not letting you take your own life so young” stays up all night spam calling them when they said they were gonna ktms only to find out they were bluffing and never even took all those pills or actually intended to hurt themselves, that kind of friend. Then when push came to shove, the one time I needed them, the one time I literally had to Voice message because I couldn’t see my keyboard through tears, they completely ignored and roleplayed over the top of me and left my messages on read.

The second was so much better, they were supportive and funny and super invested in the fandom I’m hyper fixated on and you can ask anyone in my family I was BEYOND happy with them. Then out of the blue, the admin messages me to tell me I’ve sent a server invite. I hadn’t, I didn’t even have people to invite in and I had been hiking in the desert for four hours straight with my family. They let me back in and then booted me out AGAIN after a literal misunderstanding with them thinking I was “Acting like they didn’t have a reason to kick me in the first place”, and said “I think it best if you just leave sorry.”

I tried to explain myself and they came back with “Uh huh, you still sent an invite which is all I need to know.” Mind you I’ve been friends with these people for MONTHS at the time this happens and they’re completely unwilling to hear me out.

Out of desperation not to be kicked from my only friend group at the time I offered to show them screenshots of all my recent DM’s to try and prove I hadn’t sent an invite, they came back with “I don’t need to see that you could’ve deleted the message 💀”. ATP they’re condescending me and acting as if the situation is funny and I’m having a meltdown sobbing in front of my mom and unbeknownst to me at the time starting to get sick from too much sun that day.

So I’m sobbing and seeing red at the same time, and I told them to shove a cactus up their ass but that I’d be explaining to everybody through DM’s why I was gone and what happened. But they got to everyone first, @‘ing everyone just showing me being aggressive and telling them to shove a cactus in their ass and they managed to turn everyone against me. One very sweet person was nice enough to share screenshots of the situation and let me know about it before I ever even reached out to anyone and at that point I was too humiliated to say anything watching everyone make fun of me.

I couldn’t hold food down for the next two days out of a mixture of emotional upset and what might have been heatstroke from that hike. As of today it’s been a week, 2 hours and thirty minutes since that happened and I still haven’t heard from any of those people after the admin blocked me on everything. I still have a DM with most of the people there, but they haven’t once reached out to me and I’m too scared to reach out to them. I just keep thinking about it all on loop.

Oh, and as a bonus fun little side note they fucking posted a slideshow of our DM’s on TikTok, tagged me in it and said “Uh you deserved to be banned as this screenshot shows you invited someone so yeah sowwy ☺️” AND DIDNT BLURR OR CENSOR MY USERNAME. That’s wrong on a LOT of levels, but holy fuck I’m so glad that video got taken down. I hope their 11 likes was worth my internet privacy. And again I legitimately have no clue where that invite was sent, i still swear on my life I didn’t do that.

So yeah, not a peep from any of them and I’m seeing a pattern here. Am I obnoxious, am I boring, do people not find me funny… literally wtf am I doing wrong that nobody cares about me as much as I cared about them? Maybe those were just texts to them but to me online interaction is my ONLY interaction, it meant a lot to me. Maybe I can’t force them to care about me but I wish I could at least force them to understand how bad it feels to realize you’re not cared for. Do I just sound like a chronically online pussy who’s being selfish? Idk, but the loneliness is fucking killing me and I’m scared to be open or even joke around with people anymore. I feel like there’s a standard I’m not aware of that I have to fit for anyone to even consider me an acquaintance.

I still feel literally sick just thinking about the year wasted with those first people and then months with the second, I can’t get all that time back and it doesn’t feel like a happy memory anymore it just puts a pit in my stomach to think of how it all ended.

Christ it’s 2:41 am now and this must sound so fucking dramatic, I need to go to bed.

#not transformers #lonliness rant I guess

[fitzrove]

Elisabeth hot takes

- Young Sisi/old Sisi split casting is a bad idea, going forward they just need to cast people who have the range to play both roles like they've done before. The Schönbrunn concert split was legit just done because people/the press were sexist and ageist about Pia Douwes earlier and it sucks. (No hate to Abla Alaoui tho, she was great in the 2022 show and I hope she'll get to play the entire role someday)

- Mark Seibert's Tod isn't straight,,,,, masculine queer men exist irl, yall just need to stop basing your interpretation of him on the 2022 concert/the 2013 boot with him and Anton Z because that Schatten is giving us nothing fjkgkfödlfösö. It's fine to prefer other Tods for how they look/act but that doesn't mean the buff one is heterosexual. The directors have done him so dirty in recent years

- I've seen some people go "ooh what if they split up der Tod so that he was played by an actress for the Rudolf scenes" which,,,,,, why?? I'm all for woman tod but the idea of ONLY having her for Rudolf scenes to add more heterosexuality into the show is weird. I say have a woman Tod for literally everything else but for Schatten and Mayerling it's inexplicably Mark Seibert to make Rudolf extra gay<3 why not sinking world as well, FJ gets to be gay too

- The woobification of Elisabeth musical Rudolf is so important because a lot of Rudolf/Mayerling adaptations seem to focus on how violent and dangerous he is (because of mental illness). A musical can never capture the entire nuance of an actual person anyway, so I think it's fair that at least one of the many adaptations portrays him in a completely sympathetic light - important for mental health representation. Doesn't mean the fandom is completely unaware of his historical crimes (murder, arson and graverobbing gkfdfodlså).

- Society has progressed past the need to comment "Tod X is much better" on vids/pics/posts focused on Tod Y, or even saying "Tod Y sucks" on vids/pics/posts celebrating Tod X, it's annoying and exhausting. Plus, the euromusical world is so small that on Youtube especially the actors might actually see it (Máté Kamarás has). I'm going to go to the guilty person's house if it happens to him again

- Rudolf shouldn't take the melody in the Schatten chorus in productions, there's a reason he sings the harmony in the original (he's being manipulated/Tod is stoking his obsessions and anxieties). Ofc it's more fun for the actor to sing the melody but they can do that in concerts XD EXCEPT Lander van Nuffelen can sing whatever he wants<333

- tod x rudolf is a good ship BECAUSE it's problematic 🥰

- Just because I ship Tod and Rudolf doesn't mean I want actual productions to do that. (Shipping is different than having "seduction" as a thematic element. Not that we're in much danger of that though lmao, the onstage romanticisation literally only happens with Tod and Sisi.) Humanizing der Tod too much (unless it's in a "he was an undomesticated panther but he's turning into a real boy<33" máté kamarás type character arc way or in a "he used to be cold and detached but is learning to have friends and feelings!!!" kaplyn way) takes away from the themes of the show, which to me (in productions) is much more important than ships. It's very rare to have a show be so deeply deconstructive (of historical figures, of "love story" conventions) and that needs to be treasured!!

- For this reason it's absolutely crucial that the show ends with Tod laying Elisabeth on the floor (and that he drops Rudolf after Mayerling)

#additional take that isnt really unpopular since vbw agrees: lukas perman rudolf is my poor little meow meow kitty cat and he can play #the role for however long he wants<333333 can't wait for you to singlehandedly carry the schönbrunn 2042 prod king #elisabeth #jgkfkfld #musicals #theatre