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#im digging myself a hole here and the more i try to explain myself the worse its gonna sound. girl help
xlollisbedlamx · 1 year
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lonely day
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by lolli g
So today I hung out with b.f. And underwearless alone for the first time…i never felt so lonely. They all wrap around each other at one end of my massive couch and me at the other end all alone with the couch looking empty. It was a horrible feeling. I felt like I wanted to crawl out of my skin or dig a hole, crawl in it and die…not to be dramatic or anything.
The gag couple (underwearless and b.f.) have gotten way too comfortable around me. They concently talk about fucking, fucking eachother and times they have fucked. They keep asking to sleep in my bed too…as if. Totally acting as though i never had feelings for b.f. or as if they are completely gone…fuck. There are no boundaries whick in part in my fault cause im shit at setting them up but also they could be a little more considerate but that has gone right out the mother fucking window apparently. I try to give b.f. Looks to tell him I am uncomfortable, I even make lame jokes telling them I'm uncomfortable but it falls on deaf ears. What's a girl to do???
Right now they are spooning on my couch, he's probably fingering her and I'm in here like a chump writing. I hate this little universe that I have made for myself sometimes…in a previous entry  I talked about enjoying the adventure that I am on but this part definitely sucks ass. I want a relationship, a partner…i didn't think i did but i do and here i stand alone. How will I ever meet someone? These two are so crazy about each other that they cant stop touching and kissing, telling one another “i love you” and meanwhile i am sleeping with a guy who has a pregnant girlfriend (will explain in another entry…you’ll want to read that one) i am bat shit crazy.
Is there anyone out there for me…I feel that's doubtful. I am a hot mess. Not exactly a catch ya know. Anyway I need to stop thinking about the gag couple and get some sleep. Alone. God, I am sad.
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springcatalyst · 3 years
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im getting cosmic punishment but i didnt even get to commit a crime :(
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kcatta-wodahs · 3 years
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Making Lore Out of the Angel Event
Im the definition of 'its not that deep but I'm going to dig a hole to make it that deep'
In this case its me making it that deep because otherwise this event is upsetting so I'm making some dark lore theories to make it make sense to me.
I'll have a lot of spoilers below. For the event and everything I know, which is up to like lesson 32 I think.
Basically, TLDR; this was an attack by Michael/their Father on Devildom. Simeon and Diavolo have successfully negated the threat by turning it into a game.
TLDR Thesis; The Celestial Realm is governed through careful mind control. The Demon Bros are not "avatars" because of being demons- they have been cursed by their Father to suffer as no other demon nor angel has to.
First we hear direct from Michael, and he's giving these bangles that appear to brainwash the main cast.
This was an attempt by their Father to bring them back under his control. By control, I mean this literally.
I've felt for a long time that the way the Celestial Realm seems to be run is... shady. It's a utopia to outside appearances only, and those who have been most deeply embroiled in the Great Celestial War know this.
The Great Celestial War was over free will, rather than the specifics of Lilith's situation. She was the catalyst for a long-time-coming revolt against the rulers of the Celestial Realm.
My logic for this:
The reason for Lilith's expulsion goes against the current action plan of the Celestial Realm. Peace between the realms? Sure, but their Father is bound to realize that you put angels, humans, and demons together you're going to end up with more angels like Lilith, who fall for other races. Why would he accept this truce if he lost his favored children over an issue that is very similar? Did he have a change of heart? Heavens no.
Luke's behaviour towards the demon's seems case-and-point. Luke is not the strange one out of the angelic transfer students- Simeon is. Not only that, Simeon is chosen not in an attempt to promote peace, but to protect Luke from being influenced. (Which is, again, the whole point\of the exchange program.)
That time we went to the Celestial Realm for real - Lucifer was worried. Scared, even. This can be explained by, you know, the War and Lilith.. but I wonder if it may be more sinister. Like perhaps being brainwashed.
Diavolo and Barbatos weren’t required to wear bangles to become less “demon-like” for the “party”. This is because the bangles were a ploy to get the brothers back.
My theory is that when an angel begins to show signs of rebellion or questioning the divine order, they are forcibly stopped. Michael is that enforcer, and these 'gifts' are a method of stopping them.
The bangles cause a person to act *perfectly angelic* against their free will. The people affected become all smiles and sunshine, so clearly nothing could be wrong with it, right? They’re happy, right?
No. Very not right, and we can see that through Satan.
Poor Satan is always the exception to the rule of the Brothers, as his circumstances are different from everyone else's.
In this case though, he's the one who provides insight on this mind control. 
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Let me remind you of the quotes Satan gives us during this time:
“I feel worked up.” “I don’t feel like myself at all.”
“It feels like something foreign is forcing my heart to be calm.” “Like my heart... becoming tranquil.”
Satan has never been an angel. He has never experienced this before. He has something the other brothers don’t: self-reflection. Satan can tell the difference between his feelings and feelings that are being imposed upon him. He tells you what he feels - “worked up” and “not like himself” and he is not smiling during this. He’s clearly unhappy, even though an angel might say he should feel unburdened by losing his anger.
He even mentions this.
“Normally, that wouldn’t seem like something bad, right?” “Something isn’t right.” “Maybe you shouldn’t come near me when I’m in this state.”
Satan is under the effects of the bangle, being forced to act angelic, but he can tell something “isn’t right.” He clearly shows that he thinks this is a “bad” thing, not because being calm is bad, but because it’s not “normal”. And can I remind you that he’s the Avatar of Wrath? The Sin that is most likely to be dangerous to be around - and yet it’s only when his anger is forcibly quelled that he thinks you should stay away from him. He knows that this is not something to desire. He knows that it is not happiness.
“I can’t concentrate on reading today.”
I mean, he’s obviously going through a lot, so that’s fair. But I have the theory that if he were to try and research this condition he wouldn’t be able to either. I have a theory about the Garden of Eden. My theory is about Paradise.
Remember when Eve ate the fruit? Do you know what that fruit was? Sin?
No. That fruit was knowledge.
Specifically, knowledge of good and evil. Now, why would this knowledge be something to keep from those under the control of the Celestial Realm? It sounds rather like they might be able to then make their own decisions of what is right and wrong.
Satan has known this from the beginning. Knowledge is power. The Ruler of the Celestial Realm, the other demons’ Father, knows this, too.
Why are there no other Avatars?
Sin was not something inherent to Devildom. Sin is a judgement sent from the Celestial Realm. There are no other Avatars because they are a wholly angelic creation. There are other posts that have examined the Sins as outlets, and how each of the brothers are attempting to find ways to allow themselves to express their sin so it does not overtake them.
From the get-go, we are shown that these Sins are a defining point for the brothers, but we’re also shown that they cause more trouble than anything else. Again, part-and-parcel of being a demon, right?
So why aren’t other demons like this?
Look at Diavolo and Barbatos, or even just the background demons who work across Devildom. Look at No. 2. They are all far more complex, and could even be considered normal. No. 2 is specifically meant to be based off of Mammon and his greed, but is much more rounded when we interact with it.
If Diavolo is meant to be the ruler of demonkind -- the paragon of what a demon should be -- then why would he not be the epitome of all of these Sins in one? What is Diavolo, instead?
Diavolo is accepting.
Hold up a moment here. What? Sorry y’all but it sounds to me like Mr. Demon Daddy King trusts his son enough to pass the kingdom on to him... so that must mean that Diavolo is behaving as a demon should.
Barbatos doesn’t question Diavolo’s choices. Nobody does. He’s an all around popular ruler. Devildom seems to be quite.. the opposite of what we’ve been trained to expect, huh? Trained by who exactly?
What are the Demon Brothers?
Cursed. They don’t act like other demons because they’re not like other demons. When they rebelled against their Father, they were punished for this act, but I posit that the punishment and the exile were two different acts. Their Father knew that leaving the Celestial Realm was not punishment to those who desired free will. So instead, he gave them Sin. Something that Demons are not normally bound to.
But how would the brothers know this? They only know what they’ve been taught by angels about demons. Surely these new, pressing desires come from turning into demons..? 
So, why was this not taken seriously?
Short answer: it was. But in the way that aligns with Diavolo’s ultimate goals.
Diavolo wants peace. 
Let’s Talk About Simeon
Simeon is an enigma and a half isn’t he?
Simeon is close with Michael, closer than Luke in any case. Now, I’ll be honest, I can’t remember if it was a fanfiction I read that said this or if it was canon so uh - forgive me. But Simeon was chosen to accompany Luke as an exchange student so that Luke would get some education. Simeon says this is to help relations, as Diavolo wants, but of course that’s what you would say as a sleeper agent?
Now, don’t get sad. Because we love Simeon here and we support him.
Simeon is wise and neutral. He seems to support the brothers, and even still wishes to foster a relationship with them. This could be seen as an attempt to bring them back, or some such, but I like to think that Simeon knows what’s wrong with the Celestial Realm.
Simeon, however, doesn’t think that a revolt can solve it. Simeon is working with Diavolo to create a form of peace - and has been transparent about the fact that Michael chose him to prevent Luke from being corrupted. I like to think he’s also been transparent with Diavolo about Michael’s actual goal. 
Simeon believes that the races should co-exist and love freely. How could love be evil, after all? Whether or not this is a new concept to him (because of his falling for you) or if this is just who he is, I’ll leave up to you and your preferences, but since he is now no longer undateable, it is established that he does not believe love between angels and humans to be bad - as his Father did with Lilith.
What happened, then?
My theory is that Simeon told Diavolo that Michael had given him a task - to give these bangles to the brothers to remind them of the joy they were missing by disobeying the Divine Order. Either that, or to brainwash them into coming back home. 
Simeon’s position would be revealed to Michael if he didn’t give the brothers the bangles, but he does not want to instigate another war either. So he told Diavolo Michael’s plan. 
Diavolo wants peace, and he knows that with time, the brothers can overcome this mind control as they had in the past - especially with his help. 
So thus comes the “party”. 
An excuse to make the bangles seem like a “harmless” gift, that had only gone wrong because of strange magical interference, when really they had done exactly what they were supposed to.
And a wonderful way to maintain peace while leaving the Celestial Realm to stew in their own pots. 
Simeon gets to maintain his facade for everyone - and put on a show for Michael as being loyal. He also gets to show Luke that perhaps being wholly angelic isn’t the way for some people, letting him learn a little more about peaceful coexistence. Nothing happens to ruin Diavolo’s grand plan for peace, and he gets to learn more about the curse that is set upon his friends - One that he hopes to be able to break someday, so they can live their lives unfettered by their Father.
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curioscurio · 2 years
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I hope you don't mind I weight in, I saw the drama at a latine encanto group. Of course I can't speak for all of us, but latines are (usually) mixed af, our families look like the Madrigales, we are used to seeing all skin shades under all lights and us changing "shade". Under a blue/night light my sister goes from light brown to looking really white, and I go from brown to a pale less saturated brown, some lights even make me really white looking. That what is maybe is causing the disconnect in our sides in how we see the issue, for us skin color changing is everyday stuff meanwhile the values is kept it's okay (Pepa being the lightest, Felix y Antonio the darkest, brownish, (and/or pinkish, bluish, etc depending of the palette) hues for almost everyone else). And I hope my wording does not fail me here but please remember latines are white too, our family lines have been mixed for some of us for more than 400 years, most of the our soft(? curly hair comes from the Arab influence in the Spaniards and then the Arab immigration to LATAM. Thanks for trying to help our representation but we usually find more important that our ethnic features are represented than if the skin color looks different (lighter or darker) because a palette. I just wanted to explain how the other side of the fandom saw this (albeit the user from tw was being really rude instead to trying to explain), I hope it didn't come of as rude, it was never my intention. Have a nice day!
Hello! This definitely isn't rude at all, and I apreciate you taking the time to type out and explain this to me! Also, may I ask if Latines is the preferred neutral term? I've heard mixed feelings on people regarding the term Latinx
This is a very thoughtful explanation, and really has helped me understand a little better on why everyone was so pissed off.
However, I know that no matter what, the damage is done and my intentions or the context of the post doesn't really matter anymore. That's just how the internet works lol. I've already tried defending myself but I can't change the minds of ppl who don't want to change their minds about me, so I'll just leave them to it.
Loke im noticing that the more I try and explain my side, the deeper a hole I'm probably digging? so I may as well take the advice and shut up about it, and save my breath 🙃
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solarwonux · 3 years
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10.  “I still remember the way you taste.”
31.  “Why haven’t you kissed me yet?”
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villain!wonwoo x superhero!f!reader
w.c: 2.6k (it was mistake okay I got carried away we should know this by now)
warnings: fluff, talks of death, ghosts, torture if you squint, graveyards, digging up graves (don’t do that yall), angst a little, it’s hinted that the reader can communicate with ghosts. (if you’re uncomfortable with any of these themes this one is not for you)
note: I CAN EXPLAIN OKAY I KNOW YOU WANTED JOKER WONWOO BUT LIKE IT STARTED OFF THAT WAY AND THEN I GOT SOFT. Enjoy let know your thoughts please, they mean so much to me. 
Also i will answer asks at some point, school is just keeping me super busy, BUT IM NOT IGNORING THEM THEY MAKE ME SMILE EVERY TIME I SEE THEM.
masterlist || drabble game
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Wonwoo wiped the sweat off of his brow with the back of his hand, panting slightly as he stared down at the empty grave. “Remind me again why we’re doing this?” Vernon asked, digging his shovel into the ground with the heel of his boot. He rested his forearm against the handle looking at Wonwoo through his sweaty bangs. 
“There is no reason, I was just bored.” Wonwoo shrugged, his cheeks were dusted with dirt and his white dress shirt was anything but white. The truth was he had a reason, he needed a way to meet you halfway and causing chaos was the only way to get you out of that shiny tower in the middle of the city where all the heroes resided. But his reasoning would never be voiced out loud, especially not to Vernon and so he lied like it was second nature to him. 
Wonwoo missed you, He missed getting under your skin with his snarky remarks and idiotic plans to take over the world. Or at least the city. The world was his end goal, but in order to do that he needed to succeed at taking over the city first and so far he had failed. Mainly, do to you and your teammates interrupting his plans. Though along the way something unexpected happened. He had undoubtedly fallen truly, madly, deeply in love with you. It had annoyed him at first, his mind was constantly enveloped with thoughts of you. Interrupting everything he spent years working on. 
It took him months to come to terms with his unwanted feelings and if he hadn’t snuck into the masked ball held every year at the tower; he probably wouldn’t have. But the second he saw you come down the grand staircase of the ballroom wearing a dress so blue, it put the night sky to shame; he kissed you before he could stop himself. Despite the mask he was wearing you had spotted him in the crowd and led him down an empty hallway when his urges got the best of him causing him to sin. When he pulled away he was shocked just as you were, but he was definitely floored when you had cut his apology short and kissed him again. 
“So you decided to dig up an empty grave for fun?” Vernon pushed his dirt stained hand through his hand, leaving behind little specks of dirt in its wake. “How did you even know this grave would be empty?” 
“It’s mine...well used to be mine. Obviously I’m not dead.” Wonwoo’s nonchalant tone sent shivers up Vernon’s back. Once again he found himself wondering why the hell he always found himself going along with Wonwoo’s schemes. He knew there was a reason. Wonwoo never did anything without calculating all his moves beforehand, but he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know the true reason, more so if he was going to find out soon anyway. His suspicions were confirmed when he caught sight of you. He should’ve known that this was just another one of Wonwoo’s ways to get to you. 
Vernon didn’t understand your relationship with Wonwoo, scientifically it didn’t make sense. In simple terms Wonwoo was hated by everyone and you on the other hand were not. But the two of you had snuck around for years up until the accident five months ago. Ever since then Wonwoo’s spirits were low and he was going mad. If he wasn’t holed up in his tiny room at the apartment he was bent over a desk mumbling to himself, trying to come up with ways in which he could see you again. All of Wonwoo’s attempts before this one had failed and to say he wasn’t surprised to see you sit down, legs hanging over the edge of the grave while looking down at Wonwoo lovingly, he would be lying. Though, he supposed it had to do with the fact that Wonwoo’s grave was dug up. 
“You guys having fun there?” Wonwoo jumped. He rapidly smoothed down his shirt, leaving behind streaks of dirt, and fixed his hair before turning around. A smug smile adorning his features. Vernon shook his head and rolled his eyes. Sometimes he missed the days in which Wonwoo wasn’t in love. 
“Princess what brings you here?” He winked. His clammy hands grew more wet as he leaned against the shovel, before it failed underneath his weight causing him to trip. Seeing you again was like a breath of fresh air, the pictures he kept of you and looked at every night did you no justice. For you shined brighter than the stars in the night sky and it always made Wonwoo’s heart skip a beat. 
“Cut the shit Wonwoo, I know you’ve been turning this city upside down at least once a week to get under my skin.” 
“Well, what was I supposed to do? You haven’t been answering my calls, texts or emails.” Wonwoo threw his hands up in disbelief and you rolled your eyes at his ignorance. 
“Apologize, that’s all you had to do and you wouldn’t be here digging your own grave...literally.” You huffed crossing your arms in front of you, ripping your eyes away from his. Suddenly the memory of the accident came lingering back. You knew, given his nature, Wonwoo was calculated. He used his powers to affiliate pain on his victims without moving a muscle to get what he wanted. Though, he had never used it on you, until that night. 
He had been blinded by rage and pain and you had never seen him use so much power in your years of knowing him. It scared you and when you had tried to coax him out of whatever state he was in. He did the one thing he promised he would never do. 
He used his abilities on you. 
Wonwoo sighed before hosting himself out of the hole and taking the empty seat next you. “I wanted to do it in person, but you never showed up.” He looked down at his hands playing with his fingers, twirling the ring on his pinky. His body was consumed with guilt as your screams of agony replayed in his head. Just like they did every night. He had never once felt anything but satisfaction and bliss whenever he used his powers on someone. In fact he loved the way his victims begged him to stop, that was until you were on the receiving end of his torture. 
“You know where I live. It’s a big shiny tower in the center of town. Pretty hard to miss honestly.” The airy playfulness of your voice made his stomach swirl. He truly missed you and not just on nights when the two of you gently explored each other's bodies, but just in general. 
“I know but you know how much I hate the others, especially Joshua. He always has to stick his nose into matters that don’t concern him.” He huffed, flicking a tiny spec of dirt off of his trousers. “And I was scared.” He confessed lowly, shocking Vernon who had now taken it upon himself to sit on the soil filled ground to watch the spectacle in front of him. Wonwoo never admitted his fears and though Vernon sometimes could feel them radiating off him. It was different hearing it come from his friend's mouth. 
“Of Joshua? Dude’s only got super strength and-”
“No of you. I was scared to see you suffer and to turn me away. I was scared that if I did show up putting aside indifference for your friends just to hear you say that you didn’t love me anymore.” Wonwoo let out a deep sigh at the ending of his words. He dropped his shoulders feeling the weight being lifted off them. He felt your body shake next to him and it confused him greatly, even more so when it was followed by your laugh. Though he loved it and missed it greatly. He couldn’t deny the anger he felt towards you as you laughed at his vulnerability. 
Slowly, he felt his heart close up again and brought himself up to his feet faster than he could blink. His feet moved faster than the doubt racing through his veins and your laughter came to a stop. 
He now remembered why he swore to never love again all those years ago. 
“Wonwoo, wait come back.” You hurried to your feet, smoothing down the creases on your leggings. Vernon copied your movements. He could sense the fear coming from your body, and it overwhelmed his senses. Behind his soft eyes he quietly told you to hurry before Wonwoo did something he wasn’t supposed to. Even though Wonwoo always did without planning ahead of time, there were a few instances where he didn’t care and acted carelessly. And he found himself fearing more for your heart rather than his friend's safety. 
You sighed tugging on the sleeves of your sweatshirt before turning around and ran after the only man you had ever loved. You passed many tombstones, silently paying your respects until you stopped in the middle of a small clearing, home to one familiar tombstone and Wonwoo. His hands in his pocket, eyebrows furrowed and his teeth chewing down on his teeth. 
“After she died, I promised her I wouldn’t love anyone again.” He whispered, “but then you came along and ruined it.” He turned his head, his eyes glossy with wanted tears. “Do you know how much I beat myself up every day for what I did to her. For what I did to you. I hate myself for it, I hate that I can inflict pain on everyone else but myself because I’m not one that should be suffering, not everyone else.” 
By now he had finally let his tears go. They raced down his cheeks rapidly and it shattered your heart. 
“It hurts me that you think that way about yourself. She didn’t die because of you, you tried to save her and-”
“I was too late.” Wonwoo snorted and rolled his eyes. He stared intently at the tombstone in front of him, reading his little sister’s name over and over again, letting it burn feverishly inside his mind. He missed her dearly and sometimes he wondered why you never told him anything about the conversations you would have with her whenever she visited you. But you had told him that it was a family secret between the two of you and he never questioned you again because you had used the word family and it made him feel all giddy inside.
“Let me talk Wonwoo.” You said closing the gap between you and Wonwoo. You grabbed his face in your hands and wiped away his tears with the pad of your thumb. He had always been there to comfort you on your lowest days. His sweet words and warmth grounded you back onto the Earth, but you had never gotten the opportunity to do the same to him. He always kept himself closed off and reserved. It had taken almost a year into your secret, not so secret relationship for him to tell you about his sister’s unfortunate death and a few more months after that for him to say that he loved you. Despite all those small passing moments of vulnerability he had never once cried in front of you. 
“I love you and you’re stupid for thinking that I would love you any less because of what happ-”
“I hurt you though,” Wonwoo cut you off, earning a ground shattering glare from you that sent shivers up his spine. “Sorry you can continue.” He whispered. 
“Thank you.” You smirked and wrapped your arms around his neck, making him freeze. You were the strangest person he had ever had the pleasure in knowing because normal people would never be as comfortable as you were in his presence. “I know the kind of person you are Wonwoo, through this cold exterior there is the most loving and sensible person I have ever known. I mean, baby, you spent a whole day sulking because you forgot to water your plant.” 
“You gave me that plant for my birthday, therefore he’s our child.” 
“This is exactly my point, you have the biggest of anyone I have ever known. Unfortunately, you have been dealt a bad hand in life and I really don’t understand your obsession with taking over the world. But you’re not a monster.” 
“I hurt people though, sometimes for fun.” He whispered against your skin. In the midst of your speech he had given in and circled his arms around your waist before burying his face into the crook of your neck. Leaving the two of you in an awkward and uncomfortable position. 
“And who are those people?”
“Bad people.”
“Exactly baby, they’re the scum of the Earth and you have helped stop them.” 
“Okay, but that doesn’t make me a hero. I’m just doing what you guys can’t do. On top of that Joshua’s super strength is useless, he only gets praised because he’s hot.” Wonwoo finished and raised his head, smirking. He sent you a playful wink, tears long forgotten, causing you to roll your eyes. 
“Mingyu takes forever to get ready, but that’s besides the point. You’re not a monster so stop treating yourself like one.” 
“Does that mean you forgive me?” He pouted batting his eyelashes at you. 
“Yes you big idiot.” 
“Then...why haven’t you kissed me yet?” He puckered his lips and made kissing noises, making you laugh. “Hey I’m waiting and you know I’m impatient.” He spoke through pouted lips as he leaned in closer, his lips hovered over yours teasingly until you finally caved and kissed him. He sighed happily against your mouth and deepened the kiss. He had spent five months without the feeling of your touch and it scared him that he would forget how it felt. Yet, now as he kissed you with everything in him he realized he hadn’t and it overjoyed him to the point in which he accidentally let out a moan; making you pull away quickly and eyeing him down. 
“Control yourself, your sister, her friends and Vernon are here.” You scolded making him pout. 
“I’m sorry, i just...I still remember the way you taste, and I got excited.” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. Before he could plant his lips on yours again he was met with your hand pushing him away. He whined as you tore his arms away from your waist, his body growing cold. “Nooo, one more kiss.” He reached out making grabby hands at you like a child. Instead of giving into what he wanted you turned and started walking away, “Wait, where are you going?” He stumbled against his own feet before following you. 
“Home.” You looked over at him and stuffed your hands into the front pocket of your hoodie. “You have a grave to cover up with Vernon.” 
“But I haven’t seen you in five months, just give me five more minutes please.” 
“Wonwoo you just didn’t look hard enough baby.” You said giving him a knowing smirk before leaning over, giving him a chaste kiss on his cheek. He felt his eyes grow in realization as everything started to click in his head. If what you had hinted was the truth and you had shown up to every single sight he had caused trouble in, then he had to give it to you. You were a lot more clever than you led on. “Don’t think about it too hard, I’ll leave my window open for you.” You smiled widely giving his cheek a pat and disappeared through the trees. 
“You live on the twenty fourth floor.” He yelled after you, his hands falling down at his side in defeat. He heard someone snort next to him and suddenly he remembered that Vernon was there silently observing everything, just like always did. 
“Figure it out baby, you always do.”
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binniedeactivated · 3 years
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hi binnie i wanted to request a fem!reader x dom!yeonjun when she comes home late at night smelling like someone else’s cologne and he punishes her. (sorry this is very descriptive aha im no good at english ) :3
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𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 | 𝐝𝐨𝐦!𝐲𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐧 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄 | 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭𝐲 𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐬
𝐖/𝐂 | 2.5k
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 | 𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐱, 𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐞𝐱
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“hyung, go to sleep”. soobin encourages over the video monitor.
“no we need to finish these lyrics”. yeonjun refuses. he was currently working from home in his home studio. it was more urgent to him than anyone else probably because of the real studio time he’s missed due to paternity leave. 
“hyung we can finish them tomorrow alright?”. soobin assures softly. he hated seeing the older stressing himself out. “how’s jayce? has he been sleeping okay?”. soobin asks.
yeonjun huffs and combs his hair back with his fingers in stress. he hasn’t been getting the sleep he wanted due to the six month old infant. especially since your boss needed you urgently, cutting your maternity leave and giving you later hours than usual. hence the reason why yeonjun has been practically banging his head over work. he palms his forehead in the video camera. soobin could see the weariness in his eyes.
“yeah I guess. I just put him down an hour ago. I hope he stays asleep”.
“good. you should use this time to get some sleep hyung”.
yeonjun huffs again, parting his lips to say something else before he heard the front door open and close softly. it was you trying to hurry and sneak in. maybe change your clothes and shower before yeonjun could suspect anything.
“fine I guess. I’ll get some sleep”.
“good. I’ll talk to you tomorrow hyung”.
“bye soobin”.
he waves before ending the call. he checks his watch. it was almost an hour later than when you normally came home. “babe is that you?”. he spoke.
you swiftly took your jacket off hanging it on the coat rack. you cursed under breath hating the fact that he even heard you arrive. “yes babe”. you call out from near the door.
“you know you’re like an hour late coming home. jayce was a handful today”.
you slip off your shoes. “I know, I’m sorry. I’m here now”. you tried to sound as sincere as possible. almost as if you weren’t fucking one of your best friends an hour prior.
yeonjun turns off his monitors and shuts off the equipment in his studio. he decided to check on the baby one last time before entering your shared bedroom. thank god he was still asleep.
“I’m not trying to be an asshole but baby I really need you here. why is your boss keeping you so late?”. yeonjun questions while you were digging into your closet. you were kind of glad he couldn’t see the guilty look on your face. but he definitely smelled the cologne each time you moved.
“I’m sorry it’s been really hectic at the company. I’ll talk to her to see if we can make some arrangements. why are you so upset junnie?”. you soft talked, hoping to butter him up. he sighs at the nickname, sneaking behind you to wrap his arms around your waist to smell you again on purpose.
you reeked of versace cologne. and yeonjun knew he never wore that kind.
“I’m not upset baby. I just miss you and jayce is always eating and crying”.
his lips sit at the coast of your collarbone. he peppers fluttering kisses until he reaches your neck. you breathed.
“isn’t that what you do too? eat and whine about things?” you accuse. yeonjun chuckles. “yes maybe”.
you wanted to shrug yeonjun off because honestly words couldn’t explain how fucked out you were. but you didn’t want him to think anything was up so you let his lips continue up your neck and finally to your jawline.
yeonjun could hear your breathing pattern shift due to his lips. but more than anything he saw how much you were trying to act like you wanted him, but really you wanted to tell him not tonight. that you didn’t feel like having sex because you already got your fix from someone else. and yeonjun knew it.
he pushes his bulge against your backside inching his lips to the corner of yours. you could feel him harden. “baby”. he hums. “baby please have sex with me”.
your heart raced at his words. you’ve never heard yeonjun beg in need before. you didn’t know how you were going to find the energy to oblige to his request. but he grips your waist tighter and you knew there was no letting go. he traces the outline of your breasts with his fingers, keeping note of the fact that your bra wasn’t on.
‘stupid’, yeonjun wanted to say. he knows you left the house with one on. yeonjun was furious.
“please? don’t you miss me?”. he whines again, sneaking a kiss to your lips. he glares into your eyes after he pulls away and you nod your head in counterfeit desperation. he grins into another kiss while his hand searched for the back of your thighs. while hoisting you up the both of you exchange sloppy kisses until you were being laid back onto the sheets.
he allows his tongue to roam your mouth once more before he pulls away with admiration glimmering in his eyes.
“I love you”.
you swallowed, the sheer happiness that overwhelmed him was enough to make you feel guilty about what you done. nevertheless you pout your lips and rub his cheek. “aw junnie. I love you too”.
he smiles and leans down to layer an abundance of kisses over your lips again. he  pins your wrists down gradually with his hands. “I know I haven’t been the best husband lately”. he complains in between kisses. “but I’ve been so tired and moody with the baby and you haven’t been here”. he raises your dress and pushes his bulge against the wetness of your panties. 
you pant feeling your breathing becoming shaky. “I’m sorry junnie. you’ve been the perfect husband okay? I don’t know what I was thinking working-- l-late like that”.
he tongue kisses your neck sliding your panties down your thighs in one quick movement. “you’re so pretty. I’ve been missing you”. slowly but surely he clutches your thighs and rocks down into your warmth. you wrap your arms around his neck with your gaspy moans driving straight into his ear.  your eyes roll up to the ceiling.
“godd---go a little softer junnie please”. you plead. and he follows your command slowly swaying his hips into you with care. he kisses your cheeks. “is this better baby?”. he pants into the small space between the both of your lips, satisfied with the way he was sheathed in your warmth. it felt so good and he hasn’t had it in so long.
“yes it’s perfect”. you mumble, grinding your hips against him at the same speed. it felt amazing. sex was always amazing with yeonjun. he leans down and plants another kiss on your lips. “so needy? what’s making my baby so needy? you missed me that much?”.
between your muffled cries you nodded. he was stretching you each time he inched deeper. he knew how much you loved him buried inside of you. enough to forget where you end and where he begins. “god yeonjun”. you whine against his neck. “i’ve missed you so much”. you whimper back. you felt so ashamed. you knew no one could ever fuck you like yeonjun could.
“I don’t want you to ever miss me baby. I want to always be here to love you and give what you want when you want it”.
you hold him against you, melting each time he bucks into you and feeling guilt eat you alive each time he spoke. “I’d love that so much”. you reply hazily glaring up into his eyes.
“and I love you-”. he cut himself off with a hard thrust jolting your body upwards. you gasp. he chuckles into your neck. “fuck--i hope you don’t think I’m a pervert. asking for sex as soon as you walk in the door”.
“mmmh no junnie-- you’re just as needy as I am”.
with his head buried into your neck he fucks into you a bit faster, groaning at the way you felt wrapped around his length. he got his desired effect though. you with parted lips clawing at his back. each time he rocked into you he heard you choke on your own moans and that’s exactly what he wanted. it turned him on.
“junnie I’m going to cum if you keep going like this---that’s why I want you to g-go slower”.
“I’m sorry it’s been so long I can’t control myself”. he tries his best to go at a slower pace but each time he tried he went back to the same pace he started with. you’re not far behind your orgasm and yeonjun knew just by the stutter in your hips.
“tell me when you’re about to cum baby”. he breathes.
“I’m a-about to ccum right now”. you were nearly shaking beneath him. and just as you felt like you were about release yeonjun stops his movements completely. you sank into confusion until you felt him roughly create a makeshift ponytail out of your hair and pin it against the bed above your head so you couldn’t move.
his facial expression immediately changed. instead he looked angry. his eyes were scary glaring down into yours.
“did you really think I’d let you cum you fucking cheater?”.
you glanced up at him with horror. “junnie--”.
“don’t fucking soft talk me“.
you crumbled at his tone of voice. he started pounding into you whilst biting his lips. you whimper in his hands.
“whose cologne is that hm?”.
if you weren’t choking to death on your moans before you were definitely were choking on them now. he was making you feel so good you could barely think of anything else while he was fucking you like this. you felt your orgasm build back up quickly.
“w-what cologne?”. he thrusts rough and sharp and stops just after he felt your hips stutter. you whine in desperation to cum just once. it felt like a punch in the gut.
“don’t play stupid. whose cologne are you wearing?”.
“it’s yyours”. you wanted to crawl into a hole and hide at the way he practically growled at you. he lowers his lips allowing them to overshadow yours.
“that’s not my fucking cologne and you know that. I don’t wear versace cologne. so how about you tell me who does?”.
and right there, he was filling you again. pushing his length into your depth just how you liked it, knowing it drove you insane. knowing it was just enough to make you want to cum again. his strokes were painfully slow, making your body wallow in a feeling of pleasure and anxiousness.  he bites his lips again.
“I think I like you like this. not being able to cum. you feel better around me”.
he’s groaning and you felt heat sit in your cheeks. your hips bucked up with need and he’s snapping his hips into you until he felt you stutter again. you pant heavily, grasping his shirt.
“yyeonjun please--pplease don’t stop I need to cum!”.
“tell me who wears versace cologne”. he snarls. in absolute desperation you answer, “a cclose friend of mine!”.
and just as you were about to finally cum his hips come to a halt once more.  you felt tears cascade down your cheeks. he chuckles in the midst of your pain.
“and you weren’t even smart enough to put your bra on before coming home to me. you’re pathetic as fuck. do you know that?”. he rocks his hips down again with brutal thrusts.
“jjunnie I’m sorry! it’s just I’ve been feeling so unsatisfied lately“.
yeonjun casts his eyes down on you with no remorse. he cared nothing about your explanation or your tears. you whimpered against his chest.
“how long have you been doing this? don’t lie to me”.
your needy cries were muffled into the material of his shirt. you decided to reply honestly. “s-since jayce was three months”. you sniffle.  “please let me cum yeonjun”.
for an affair that he thought was only just a few weeks ended up being months. yeonjun couldn’t believe you. he couldn’t believe you’d intentionally sabotage the family that the both of you started together. he knows he was stressed and moody lately but it was because he was taking care of jayce by himself. and you were no where to be found. tears rimmed his eyes.
his hips stop and he cums good and hard just how he hoped. except you didn’t. you were a tear stained mess beneath him shaking and crying. yet he didn’t care. he leaned off of you and started zipping up his pants. and almost as if he could sense that his father was near, jayce began to softly cry in the next room over.
yeonjun glares down at you in pure disgust.
“I want you to pack your stuff and get out of my house”.
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zerot0all · 3 years
Text
Hello my beautiful sinners, this is gona be a long one so take a seat...
It’s been a while , I hope you’ve all been good. I know times are tough but just know that you are loved. Every single second, of every hour of every day.. I love and appreciate each one of you 💕
But I do come with some bittersweet news.
Some may say it’s bad news, but I truly think it’s good news...
If you’ve been following me for a while, I’m sure you have noticed how absent I’ve been. But before I get into detail, this was a personal decision...
As the days passed by, I kept questioning the reason why I started this blog. I was in a very dark and sad place, I felt alone and needed to express myself in some way or form. Reading and writing have been a hobby of mine since I was little, none of that becoming my real life goal , it was just a hobby and I enjoyed it.
I’ve been around the writers blogs, Wattpad and noticed the way many writers would interact with their readers. Some bad and some very appreciative... I noticed that I wanted to become a safe place for those who don’t feel like they fit in anywhere.
So I was happy with how things were going on here...
Till I wasn’t.
2 years down and I’ve fallen many times down a dark hole of emptiness. Sometimes I couldn’t explain as to why I felt this way, but I did. And I would isolate myself...
The inspiration was out the window and there were no hopes of it coming back... till recently.
I sat down and I had a very deep conversation with my sister (CD) and some best friends who I have actually met on here. I explained my feelings and emotions and told them about my idea.. an idea that would most likely be the answer to my gloominess. My sister and friends were immediately on board, they said it was a great idea and whatever I decided to do- they would follow me till the end.
But before we get to that .. I want to explain that this was my fault. I dug myself into this hole and I finally felt like I was drowning.
I knew I needed a way out and fast...
It’s my fault that I wanted to write about so many groups. I said yes to everything and wanted to give y’all whatever your little hearts desired. I spread myself too thin and I was once again, stuck.
I do stan A LOT of groups, but I should have just kept it to a minimum.
I don’t wish to write on here anymore. I cant finish anything. I’m physically and mentally drained everytime I come on here. Because I. CANT. DELIVER.
I’ve decided to close down this blog. I refuse to force myself to write when I’m not inspired, I apologize. This is not your fault but mine, and all I wanted to do was give y’all everything...
Requests have been deleted. Stories will no longer get another chapter. And kpop confessions are closed.
This blog will NOT be deleted. I’ll leave it up for whoever wishes to explore this messy blog haha
There is a lot on here but nothing has been updated, so you’re gona have to dig deep into the history of this blog. I will forever apologize but I have to look out for myself...
Now, the good part of this news:
I have opened another blog (no judging) I will start fresh , keep it clean and organized and write about 2-3 groups. O N L Y 👀
——> @DesireFull0fSin
https://desirefull0fsin.tumblr.com/
The new blog will still have kpop confessions, requests (whenver I open them), and the basics- one shots, drabbles, scenarios, etc.
I will only write for-
•ATZ
•SKZ
•Astro
• ??? (Maybe one more... still debating.)
But that’s it.
Im trying to start brand new, clean canvas and hopefully a shit ton of ideas to create a new world for y’all. I know I didn’t have to give a long ass explanation but i honestly feel like you all deserve it.
So, if you wish to continue following me , go ahead and follow that link. If you don’t wanna follow, then that’s cool too. I hope and wish you all the best.
Thank you for giving me such amazing memories on this blog, but let’s close this chapter and move on to another adventure.
Love you all , stay sinful 🖤
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quotes-of-dreamland · 3 years
Note
my last ask for the night:
i am the one who made the "least fav" joke. this was COMPLETELY lighthearted, and it was just making fun of the idea of favorite mods
i then replied with "don't worry, ..." thinking there might have been a mixup or something, but i guess it just made it worse
lastly, i replied with "was NOT ..." for the same reason
i have not sent any other asks on this topic, so in case it isn't clear, i do not have a favorite or least favorite or any other view of the mods
frankly, i always enjoy seeing content from the less active mods because i think they all should be recognized for their contributions
of course no amount of explaining will change anything, as usual im misunderstood, but i guess it doesn't matter, so
I'm sorry.
/g
Mod Taranza:
Thank you for coming forward and being honest. We don’t accept your apology, or at least I sure as hell don’t. I never will. Call me cruel, but I’m putting my foot down on this. It wasn’t even funny as a joke. In what universe would that be a funny joke? I’ve been bullied with that kind of implication before. I’ve had to seriously fear my friends forgetting about me before and feeling like the odd one out. I cannot stress enough how inappropriate that was. You weren’t making a joke, you were just being the thing.
SECONDLY, you don’t come back saying sorry to begin with and clearing up the mistake, you just add onto it and adding further stress onto it when we set a boundary on “don’t do this kind of talk please”
But that didn’t stop there either! You just kept fucking going long after you should have taken the initial post as your warning and stop. This isn’t just being socially inept or ignorant, this was straight up unacceptable. Do you have any idea what kind of fucking panic you caused? Just how frantic everyone was tonight trying to keep calm in this? You caused one of the mods, no not just that, one of my best friends to feel absolutely horrible. They felt so horrible they wanted to scream, and I had to sit and scroll through all this bullshit.
Normally, I wouldn’t be so bothered. Normally I could just let this all slide off me and continue on! But this. This was fucking unacceptable. I don’t care who you are. I don’t care whatever issues you have. You should have known better. If you’re old enough to be using the internet and talking with people, you should have known better by now not to do this ever.
So please. If you’re really sorry. If you hold any true shred of regret. Don’t talk to us ever again. I don’t want to see your kind of talk here again. Let us try to get over this in our own time and grow to trust our own followers and audience again for the fifth time this god damn year. Because if this were up to me you would be blocked from ever interacting with anything we do ever again. Good fucking riddance.
Bandana Moddle Dee: Honestly, it sucks that I have to drop the persona that I like to be for this, but fading away is something that I fear nightly. To essentially be told that I’m a side character hurts. I usually don’t butt in on these since I don’t think what was done was that bad. This is an exception. I’m not sorry. The door is that way.
Mod Susie: Your first ask was an opportunity for us to set a boundary that was overdue to be set. That was me saying 'this is not an okay thing for you to say.' That was strike one. THEN, you came back by digging yourself a deeper hole, trying to defend yourself. Despite this not being the opinion you held, you still tried to defend it. Strike two. Then you pushed the issue ONE MORE TIME. Strike three. I'm glad you apologized. Let me be less vague: This is a boundary. This is a boundary and we will not tolerate it. Thank you. Have a good [timezone].
Mod Lor: I'm like Moddle Dee in that I usually stay out of this sort of thing, but this is too much for me to simply ignore.
Do you have any fucking idea how this makes us all feel?
I don't care what the hell kind of justification you have. I don't give one damn single electron-sized flying FUCK if you thought what you were saying is funny or uplifted the mods you're putting on a pedestal. In the very best case scenario, it was a backhanded compliment. Putting a few of us up on shiny special pedestals, ignoring the fact it implies the rest of us are lesser or inferior. Our activity on this blog isn't a fucking contest.
Now, let me speak about myself for a moment. This is the first group of friends I've had in literal YEARS where I DIDN'T feel like an outsider or extra or third wheel. I've lived practically my entire life feeling like the permanent new kid in school with every group I've been a part of; like I was never part of them really. Sure, people said they were friends with me, but were they really? Or was I just the extra unwanted person that they were too scared to tell to leave? Yeah, just imagine living like that for over a decade..
Things have been different here. I actually feel like one of the members in this group, not an extra.. Do you think for one millisecond that it's ok to invalidate that? To once again label me and others as just side characters among their own friends? Because if you do, here comes a reality check!
This isn't a game. This isn't a fucking TV show, or a book, or a play. We are REAL PEOPLE. We are REAL FRIENDS who run this blog because we wanted to share our enjoyment of a series with our followers. We have REAL FEELINGS. So if you're going to stomp all over that just to make some shitty, unfunny, underhanded joke?
Get the fuck away from us, get the fuck away from this blog, and get the fuck away from this entire god damned website.
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ranger-jedi-knight · 4 years
Text
A New Hero Ch 19
AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20887313/chapters/63175624 Taglist: @bluesimani OPEN
So, it’s been a little while since this was updated. Sorry, but well, my sister came for a visit for a week n a half about n well, ya. That took up a lot of my time. N then I also wanted to get that self-indulgent one-shot angst done so ya. I think that one shot was the biggest reason since motivation came and went. Also, I’m getting ready to move to live with my sister for one of my college semesters to see how I enjoy it. And well, idk when this will come out so ya. That’s also pushing back this update since im spending some days packing up stuff I want to bring with me besides clothes, school supplies, and hygiene item......its after finally arriving and unpackin...BUT ITS HERE NOW!(im sorry bout the wait)
No matter tho! This is the next day after the dinner n we get to see how the night went before gettin some more daminette(n some dick/alya/xavier....i need to come up with a ship name for em....feel free to offer some)!! Anyways, enjoy!!!!
Small sounds woke Dick up from his sleep. He looked around, trying to see if there was any danger when he noticed next to him Alya was making soft sounds, her head turning a bit as barely audible ‘no’s left her. She was curled up next to him, her hair a bit of a mess, her bangs and sides plastered to her face while the rest tangled on the pillow. Her back was to Xavier, who had woken up as well and started making soft, soothing hums as he ran a hand along her arm.
Seeing the immediate effect, Dick started running a hand thru her hair, humming along to the tune Xavier began. Moving closer, Alya latched onto Dick, her arms wrapping around his waist as she tried burying her face into his side. The two wrapped themselves around her and continued their soft hums and touches, slowly helping her out of her nightmare.
After some time, Alya’s breathing settled down as she was once more relaxed in her sleep. Xavier smiled softly at dick as he pressed a kiss to the back of Alya’s head and slowly fell back asleep after watching for a few minutes to make sure her nightmare didn’t start back up. Dick tho, he stayed up a bit longer, continuing to run his finger’s thru her hair, untangling it gently. Pressing a kiss to her forehead, Dick sighed thru his nose before falling asleep next to them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧~~~~~~~~~~~~
Damian woke to Alfred the cat jumping off his bed. Usually, that wouldn’t wake him. But tonight, the way he jumped off the bed woke Damian. Usually, Alfred’s jumps were relaxed and slow, moving at his own pace. But right then, it seemed more urgent. He looked around and found Xan awake.
Xan had his arms wrapped around his knees as he stared at the door. Looking closer as his eyes adjusted to the darkness, Damian noticed that Xan was tense, his fingers digging into his arms. Alfred was rubbing himself against Xan’s side and legs, a purr leaving him to help soothe Xan. As Damian watched, Xan moved a hand from his arm and started scratching Alfred’s head and chin.
Damian moved from his bed and sat down near Xan, giving him a moment before speaking finally. “What happened?” he asked, and Xan glanced over at Damian before looking at the door again.
“I saw them,” Xan started in a whispered, not needing to elaborate for Damian, he already knew who ‘they’ were. “We were at the League tho. I......I attacked them immediately when she asked me too. I didn’t hesitate. I couldn’t stop myself as-as I-” he stopped then, taking a deep, shuddering breath. He took a moment to concentrate on Alfred under his fingers before he continued speaking. “I killed them,” he spoke the words so softly that Damian almost didn’t hear it.
“But you didn’t. It was just a nightmare. Nothing about it is true,” Damian said, and Xan nodded slowly at that.
“Maybe, but.......it was so vivid...so clear. It felt like I was still in the league, following their orders blindly to survive. It was like I never left....like you never helped me out of that hell hole,” he admitted, and Damian reached over and squeezed Xan’s shoulder.
“I know. It can seem so real, make you think you never left even thou you do the one thing you know you would never do. I’ve had similar nightmares,” Damian admitted and Xan glanced over at him.
“Really? Do you still?” he asked softly as Damian reached a hand out to scratch Alfred’s chin.
“Occasionally, yes. It does get better, I promise. It just takes time. You can always come talk to me or Jason. Or Rae even. Do you remember her?” Damian asked and Xan pursed his lips before nodding slowly, he remembered the woman. She helped train him in League before disappearing years prior. “She will listen if you ask her too.”
“Where is she?” Xan asked turning a bit to look over at Damian easier.
“She’s opening a restaurant called Janat Al'Amal, but she’s working at Rose Petal’s Boutique until it’s ready for the grand opening,” Damian said and Xan smiled with a small smile on his lips.
“Paradise of Hope...that’s a nice name,” Xan said and Damian had the faintest of smiles as he nodded agreement.
“It is. She chose a great name for her future restaurant. I’ve been in touch with her along with Jon and Ember. You haven’t met Ember yet but she’s Jon’s friend and hangs with us. Rae likes to let people vent or talk about their problems to her,” Damian explained and Xan nodded understanding.
“I’ll go talk with her tom-today?” he said tilting his head to look at the clock and saw that it was past midnight, around 1 am.
“Good. I can bet you won’t go to sleep immediately, right?” Damian asked and Xan nodded. Getting the confirmation, Damian stood up and went over to his desk and pulled out a sketchbook and pencil, and walked over to Xan. “Mari said you drew to relax. Here,” he crouched down and held it out.
“Thanks,” Xan said giving Damian a small smile as he took the offered items and flipped the pages to a clear one and started sketching. Damian nodded as he then went back to his bed. Laying down, he looked over at Xan one last time, watching as he drew intently with Alfred going onto his shoulders to relax, before falling asleep once more, knowing he did what he could to help his friend.
~~~~~~~~~~~~(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧~~~~~~~~~~~~
Xan and Damian were one of the first people up in the morning. They got a quick bite to eat before going to the indoor gym the manor had to spar for a bit. Alfred worked on breakfast for everyone when the two left. Clark was up next followed by Kon and Jon. By 8, Dick, Xavier, Jason, and Tim came down to eat and work on some stuff. After some time, Alya came down walking beside Lana as she took slow steps.
Raising a hand, Lana greeted everyone sleepily as she slowly woke up. “How are you feeling, Lana?” Clark asked setting the newspaper down to look over at her. The rest of the family looked over as well as she gave a small smile.
“Better. Thank you for letting us stay the night,” she said and Clark returned the smile.
“It was nothing,” Clark said moving his hand to look at the time. “Well, I better get going. I promised Perry I’d send over my article before noon. Have a good day you guys. Also, Lana, I would like to talk to you about your future,” Clark said and Lana smiled at that and nodded. Getting the nod from Lana, Clark left to the office Bruce got him so that he could work.
“I’m glad your feeling better now, Lana,” Jason said and Lana glanced over at him with a faint smile.
“Ya, sorry about that,” she mumbled softly, glancing over at Alya who squeezed her shoulder.
“Don’t be. You couldn’t have known,” Jason said and Lana nodded, knowing he was right.
“Lana, would you be willing to accompany me to pick up Mari? She’d love to see that you’re doing better this morning,” Damian said and Lana nodded.
“Sure. But I won’t be able to stay long, I shouldn’t leave Cocoa alone much longer, especially since it’s time for breakfast,” Lana replied and Damian nodded.
“Understood. Let’s head over now and I can drop you off after Mari sees that you’re well,” Damian replied and Lana nodded, eating a slice of toast and some fruit before standing up with Damian to head out.
“I’ll talk to you later, Lana,” Alya called out before Lana left the room.
“Als, I’ll be heading out myself. Fresh air will do me some good. There’s also someone I want to visit,” Xan said and Alya nodded.
“Of course. Stay safe, Xan. And Don’t hesitate to call if you need help,” she replied and Xan nodded before getting up. “Dick?” she asked and Dick smiled.
“Yup, we should get going ourselves,” Dick agreed.
“Don’t die,” Tim called out.
“No promises, you’ve seen, Mr. Lingo,” Dick yelled back as the three left the room and Tim nodded agreement.
~~~~~~~~~~~~(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mari beamed when she saw Damian and Lana entering the hotel lobby. Jumping up from her seat at the table, she ran over to the two and hugged Lana while her friends smiled from the table. “I’m so sorry for what happened, Lana! I should have asked first before making them!” Mari said as Lana returned the hug before pushing Mari back a bit to look Mari in the eyes and give her a gentle smile.
“It’s ok, Mari. Nothing bad happened. And I should have also asked about it. It’s my problem to remember, not yours. As much as I’d like to stay and talk, I need to get home, Cocoa is waiting for me,” Lana said, squeezing Mari’s shoulders as she spoke. Mari returned the small smile as she nodded.
“Ok,” she said before perking up. “Wait!” she rushed over to their table and Chloe held out the bag of cookies to her. She grabbed the bag and ran back over to the two. “Here, I made these for you! Don’t worry, I made sure nothing pecan came near them!”
Lana smiled softly as she took the bag and put them carefully into her pocket and pulled Mari into another hug. “Thank you,” she whispered before pulling back once more.
“I’ll be back after I drop her off, angel,” Damian said, causing to Mari to blush lightly as she nodded understanding. As the two turned away to leave, Lana had a teasing smile after giggling softly at Mari’s blush.
“‘Angel’, huh?” she asked, sending him a look that had Damian blushing lightly. Before the door closed behind the two, Mari and her friends listened to Lana laugh. Mari walked over to the table and continued to eat her breakfast while her friends sent her looks.
“I think you found yourself a ~boyfriend~,” Lila said in a sing-song voice. Mari’s blush deepened at that.
“I-no-!-He-!” Mari stuttered out, unable to form a single sentence while her friends laughed around her. “Oh!” she crossed her arms on the table and slammed her head down onto them. Adrien smiled softly as he patted her back while Lila covered her mouth with her hand to stifle giggles.
“Don’t worry Maribug, I’m sure he’d be delighted to be dating you,” Adrien said as Chloe nodded agreement next to him, leaning closer against him to look at her.
“Adrikins is right! He’d be a fool to not want to date you,” Chloe declared with a nod that the others shared.
“I agree. If he doesn’t ask you out today, then you need to do it yourself Mari,” Kim said with a serious look
“I-I wouldn’t even know how to!” Mari said with wide eyes and the table chuckled softly or shook their heads.
“Just be straight forward. Say how you feel then ask ‘would you go out on a date with me?’. Or, if that’s too scary ask him to hang out with you, alone,” Lila said and the group nodded agreement. Right then, the doors opened showing Damian entering with two people.
“Jon!” Chloe yelled out excited and the two got up quickly and ran over to Jon. Jon smiled as he hugged the two.
“I know it’s only been a couple of days, but that’s two days too long,” Jon whispered and the two nodded agreement.
“Definitely,” Chloe said pulling him to the table. Jon happily let them pull him to a table and sat between the two, holding their hands.
“Jon and Ember were walking by as I came back,” Damian said as Ember waved to them with a smile.
“Hi! It’s nice to meet Jon and Damian’s friends! Damian doesn’t admit it, but we’re friends,” Ember greeted, saying the last part in a mock whispered that had the group snorting while Damian rolled his eyes. “But call me Elle! Practically everyone does,” she said as the group smiled at her.
“How’d you meet him?” Kim asked leaning onto the table, wanting to know the story since when he first met Damian so long ago the dude was rather cold still.
“Jon. I was friends with Jon since he helped me in elementary school. And so then Jon and Damian became sorta friends. When that happened, I was introduced to Damian. It was hard but he likes me now,” she said and the group nodded.
“Is he still called ‘Ice Prince’?” Nino asked, pushing his cap back a bit.
“Oh ya. I have been warned against talking to him by like....everyone it seems at some point since I joined GA this year,” Ember said with a laugh and Damian had a smirk at that, a soft snort leaving him that only Mari heard.
“Really? Why’s that?” Max asked then, pausing in his typing on his phone.
“All the freshmen get warned about him. Even tho it was...what....years ago that you broke a kid’s arm?” Ember asked looking over at Damian who nodded.
“Yes. I broke a kids arm when I was in fifth grade. Give or take 8 years ago,” Damian replied and Ember nodded.
“Wait......freshmen? You were warned about him even thou you were there for that?” Kim asked confused and Ember shook her head.
“I wasn’t there for that exactly. I’m a freshman right now....well sophomore now while they’re seniors.”
“Oh, ok. You’re younger than them,” Nino replied and Ember nodded with a smile.
“H-hey, Mari?” a timid voice called. The group turned to see Alya standing there looking rather shy, which was weird for them. “I talked to Ms. Bustier and got us the day off. I thought you’d like to have a break from working and hang out with your friends,” Alya said and Mari gave the girl a small smile and nod.
“Thank you, Alya,” Mari said and Alya gave Mari one last timid smile before going back to the others that were sort of being shunned by Mari and her friends.
“That was nice of her,” Damian commented as he watched Alya sit down, looking down, he could only guess it was her phone.
“It was,” Mari agreed, she knew, or could guess that is, why Alya was doing it. But she wasn’t sure she’d be able to forgive Alya and the others yet, let alone become their friends again, after everything.
“Since we have the day off, why don’t we do something?” Lila asked with a tilt of her head. The group nodded excitedly in agreement.
“We should! Maybe a park?” Sabrina suggested and the group nodded as Mari looked over at Damian with a tilt of her head.
“Are there any parks you’d suggest for us to visit?” Mari asked and Damian’s head tilted just slightly as he thought about it before nodding.
“Yes. There’s a lovely park a few miles away. Not many people visit it due to it being owned by Poison Ivy, but that’s even better since there won’t be any ruckus to disturb the beauty,” Damian said, and that had Mari beaming.
“Really? Let’s go!” Mari said and the group laughed softly at her eagerness. They all stood up and left the hotel, following Damian as he led the way while Ember chatted with Lila about the two, and Jon was distracted by his girlfriend and boyfriend.
Damian had the softest look on his face as he watched Mari look around the park in awe. He watched as she flitted about sketching things and taking pictures. Jon had a small smile as he looked between his lovers and Damian. “You should ask her out,” Jon said softly as Mari talked excitedly with her friends.
“Maybe I will,” Damian said softly as he started making his way over to Mari. Mari glanced over curious when Lila pointed out he was coming over. “May I speak to you alone?” he asked and Mari nodded and followed him to a willow tree at the corner and pack of the park with lanterns hanging intermittently from its branches.
Foxy @actingfordays
OMG!!! Look what’s happening!!! Is it what I think!?!? #omg #isit? #opt *picture of Damian and Mari under the willow tree*
      A Blocked Owl @owlforlife
      Oh my god. THE OTP IS HAPPENING!!! #otp #iceprincesunshine #sunshinechild
Ok, so this update was delayed....but I did get this done BEFORE wednesday!! So hah! I hope you guys enjoyed this chap! I bet you guys can guess whats gonna happen next chap!! Until next time!! -Love Willa<3<3<3
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Okay so last week was a shitkicker and was literally so bad I spent the better part of the week trying to delude myself into thinking it was a good day. Like, we're talking, "the sun is shining and I'm here to see it so today is a good day" and "I'm having a bad day- fuck me I am not haveing a bad day- I'm having a good day- I'm not having a bad day". Denial is a powerful tool for mental health, apply judiciously. I get that everyone on earth is kinda having a shitty year but it feels like things just kinda escalated in my little corner
The 7th had a huge snow storm that brought traffic to a stand still. No one could leave the house and university class was online anyway. Batshit customer demanded to pick up her gear anyway. I drove in because I was the only person with keys to the shop that could get to the building. It took me a solid 2 hours going 15mph on the highway. The snow in the parking lot was up past the fenders of my truck. Crazy lady gets 10 out of 18 of her survival suits back but the other 8 still have holes in them because our only repair tech is also the only one who answers the phone or runs the computer or handles customers or cleans or disinfects anything or stores gear. I'll give you one guess who that person is.
Did you guess me? Good for you. Fun fact this was not the case in October.
Crazy lady swans off through the snowed in parking lot and because she cant find the exit, blasts straight through the ditch and onto the road.
I say fuck it and leave. I've been at work for 2 hours. I have made 24 dollars for my trouble. It takes me another hour to get home.
The 8th is Saturday and I'm supposed to be at work. No one can drive. There was another 10 8nches of snow last night. I say fuck work and go to dig out the plow truck. The canopy over the plow truck collapses as I walk out to clear the snow of it.
I do not scream.
My partner and I get the truck running and go plow people out of their driveways and then go do the shop.
We come back home and the heater doesn't work. We just spent most of last week frantically trying to limp the thing along because no heat at -20°F is in a word fucking unpleasant. At least now its 40 degrees warmer because if the snowstorm. We take it apart again. The house smells like diesel. The house smells like exhaust. The house is not cold because the wood stove can keep up at 20 above zero but it won't keep us through the winter.
There is no saving the oil heater. We need a new one.
Its 730 and neither of us have eaten. I start rice in the pressure cooker so I can throw a tasty bite on top and call it dinner and that dies too. Explosively.
Dinner is half cooked rice and microwaved curry.
Sunday is spent finding a way to stretch our increasingly thin budget to buy a new heater. Between us we actually have 2275$ and we will still cover the mortgage. Somehow. All our Christmas gifts will be hand made this year. The next thing that breaks will stay broken.
Monday, power outages due to snow storm. No wifi, no zoom meetings. Another 8 inches of snow. This is now more snow than my city gets for the full year.
My boss calls sobbing. The dog died. Joey, an 11 year old, 130lb mastiff with a tumor the size of a football on his liver has been her constant companion for at least 8 years. The pandemic has confused the bejesus out of him because while he loves the lock down and going out to play every hour or so he doesnt really like the concept of strangers in masks. Hes a guard dog and doesnt understand that men in masks coming into the shop are not here to kill mom they're wearing masks so they don't kill mom.
Mondays the shop is closed anyway and I spend it installing the new heater. It doesn't quite fit in the space the old heater came out of but its warm.
Tuesday, I go to work, everyone cancels class, I once again gently explain to a regular that eugenics is bad. I would like to curse him out. I cant. He drops a grand on scuba gear and leaves, talking about how great his trip to Mexico will be.
I do not scream.
A friend calls to ask how I'm doing. Not great. Yea, her niether. She asks if I want to go out to the backcountry with her over the weekend. I explain that my leg physically does not move and I'm downing copious amounts of advil to remain upright. The doctor sent me in for an MRI but has not yet called back. Plus I'm supposed to go to Valdez for the weekend and actually go diving. That I can do with limited use of my leg.
She says yikes, take it easy, take care of yourself, I love you.
I say, yikes, I'm tired of taking it easy, I wanna play, I love you too.
Hit me up if your plans open up and we can do something gentle on your leg. She says.
God yes. The cold woods away from people sounds like paradise. I dont even care that it will cause me rending physical pain to get there. I need a break.
Its Wednesday. I go to school. I get pulled over. Miraculously I dont get a ticket. I'm white female and conventionaly attractive, maybe not so miraculous. I rolled through a stop sign but I'm pretty sure I couldn't afford a ticket.
I get a text in class. One of the instructors who works with the dive shop has tested positive for covid. I haven't seen the man in 2 months. I needed a spare instructor but he was nowhere to be found. But hey, evidently that's a good thing.
I go to work. I vacillate between doing the job a 4 people and having nothing to do.
I go to the grocery store because I misjudged my last monthly grocery run and even though I'm increasing my exposure I'm out of cheese and tea damnit.
The store is packed. Pandemic who?
My partner and I haven't had a date nite in a while and this week has been shitty. I want a nice dinner. I pick up a couple boxes of the carton sushi which isnt terrible and is about as nice as I can justify on the new budget. I grab a gallon of milk and a few other things. I forgot my wallet in the truck and the cashier is chill and sets my stuff aside while I grab it.
I pay and take my stuff home and realize I left one of my bags at the store. No cheese or tea for me.
Thursday. 10am my phone goes off with an emergency alert. The govoner has grown a spine in light of recent elections and is instituting a voluntary lock down. My state has 500 new cases a day. That might not sound like a lot but theres only 300,000 people in Alaska and we've got poor medical infrastructure.
Unfortunately Alaska is full of Alaskans and nobody can tell us what to do. Nothing changes. 7pm rolls around and I'm teaching scuba classes in the pool.
I load a few hundred pounds of scuba gear into the back of my truck. In a wet wetsuit. In the snow. In a fabric facemask. 6 feet apart. In the pool.
I dont get paid for pool time.
Over the summer we had 6 dive masters including me, all big burly dudes, much better suited to picking things up. Its November and I'm the only one.
The kids I'm teaching are going to Hawaii. They're 10 and 13 and so wildly excited about breathing underwater its beautiful to watch. And they're traveling to an island. In a pandemic.
Friday.
Unload scuba gear so it doesnt get stolen out of the back of my truck while I'm at class. Were doing a make up lab today. Hey of the five student in my class only one of us has covid so theres that.
My boss calls an let's me know that shes left for Valdez without me. If I'd like to make an 8 hour drive by myself in a snowstorm I'm welcome to follow.
I'm in class till an hour before shop closing. I'm not driving across town so I can run on the open sign for half an hour.
The shop stays closed on Friday.
Saturday.
I explained to everyone we had business with that the shop would be closed over the weekend and Friday. I planned on being in Valdez. Hell I canceled plans to be in Valdez.
I open the shop and immediately field calls about why we werent open. I start to explain about the Valdez trip and logistical difficulties and then I realize that shes not mad about that. The woman was here before I opened early this morning. We have never been open that early. The hours are on the door.
A regular comes in. Hes also confused as to why I'm here.
Sunday finds me curled up in bed, reluctant to leave. Getting out of bed has not played out well for me recently.
A friend comes over to chat with my partner about specialist rifle parts. This isnt that wierd, he works at a gun shop and they've been discussing upgrading my partners current rifle set up.
He is wearing a full Scottish kilt. Red tartan. Looks very lovely.
I make zucchini bread and my proportions are a little off because I have too much zucchini so it's a little over moist but it's good. I'm recovering from an asskicker of a week and next week will be better.
Monday morning:
Baby brother has covid
Dads getting the results of his rapid test tonight.
Mom isnt getting tested because she says she doesnt have symptoms but that's not the fucking point mom.
So, I'm not going home for thanksgiving. I'm not diving in Valdez. I'm not skiing backcountry.
I'm not sick. I'm not flat broke yet. I dont have a ticket. I have a job. I have people who care about me. Im managing my physical and mental health as best I can. Im just fucking exhausted.
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katiebug445 · 4 years
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Happy Birthday, Marco!
so some context: im in the process of reading attack on titan before the fall and i fucking adore cardina baumeister with my entire fucking heart, he’s such a soft boy and my heart belongs to him and i want his little gay ass to be as happy as can be, so i thought, you know who else needs someone to be soft and happy with? marco. so mardina was born and i fucking adore this ship with my whole heart and they’re just CUTE together okay they fucking are so im posting this but whatever i don’t need to justify myself just take it
Cardina wanted nothing but for it to be special.
He and Marco had been together for just a little under a year, and it was the first birthday they were getting to celebrate as a couple. He’d been planning it in secret for months, buying little things here and there when he was able to go shopping on his own, hiding it away in the top of his closet, where he knew Marco never noticed things. He’d even gone so far as to message Marco’s best friend, a man named Jean who had always scared the hell out of him, for help in making the cake.
Cardina wanted to do it from scratch, to make something entirely homemade for his birthday, but he genuinely had no idea what he was doing, and Jean was a chef, so why not?
Once Marco left for work that morning, Cardina sprang out of bed and got started as soon as the car pulled away, pulling down all of the decorations and ingredients he’d picked up, and took everything down to the kitchen so he could get started.
He dumped everything out onto the table and began to sort it absentmindedly as he tapped around on his phone for a playlist that Marco had made for him of all of his favorite songs, and once it was playing, he tied his hair back and started ripping open packages. The decorating was one of his favorite parts of this stuff, figuring out the perfect placements for banners and streamers and every other little thing was always so much fun for him, he wished he had the chance to do it more often.
Once everything was how he wanted it, Cardina went back to the kitchen, bopping along to a cheery song that he knew Marco loved, and hummed along with it as he typed out a message for Jean, telling him he was ready for him to send over the easiest recipe he had on hand. While he waited for him to get back, he rounded up everything that he assumed he would need to make a cake, trying to remember all of the baking things that Marco used when they made box brownies and cookies.
He kept peeking over at his phone, but nothing had come through yet, and Cardina was starting to get impatient waiting for it. He tried to distract himself by tidying up some little things here and there, but that didn’t take nearly enough time up before he was back at his phone, cursing quietly to himself and wondering if Jean actually knew how to text at all, by the speed it was taking.
Cardina found himself wandering back upstairs with his phone in hand, deciding to go ahead and get dressed, and before he realized what he was doing, had one of Marco’s shirts pulled on, along with his favorite pair of pants and an old baseball cap that he’d been given by his boyfriend, and pulled his ponytail through the hole in the back. Finally, his phone dinged with a message, and a text long enough that it had to be broken up in three parts came through. Suddenly, he realized why it had taken Jean so long to get back to him: He’d written out a novel!
He quickly scanned over the recipe, still a bit intimidated despite this being an “easy” cake, and typed out a quick thank you to Jean before heading back downstairs so he could get started looking for the rest of what he needed. Unlike the boxed goodies that they’d made previously, this required a lot more ingredients, several of which they didn’t have. Panicked, Cardina sent another text asking if it would be okay not to use some of the stuff, and Jean explained that it could, thankfully, be substituted by a few things he did have on hand.
Cardina read over the beginning of the texts from Jean three times, just to make sure he had down everything that he needed, and got started, putting in as much care as he possibly could to every step, and smiled to himself when he was finished mixing in the wet ingredients. It looked good, if he said so himself, and felt a bit of pride in himself for getting that far in without messing it up.
Next came the dry parts, all of which he had ready in a smaller bowl, which he soon realized was a mistake. Everything went in nice and easy until he got to the flour, which was a lot lighter and dustier than anything else, and he made the mistake of dumping it in all together, which created a giant puff of white, which ended up all over his face, his shirt, and even, to his surprise, in his hair. Coughing, Cardina fanned the flour out of his face, and looked over the next bit of the recipe, which was to put everything in together, and mix it. Easy, he thought.
Seeing as the wet ingredients had the bigger bowl, he decided to dump the dry into it, but the bowl was heavier than he expected, and, once again, he was covered in an even bigger mess, and the wet bowl teetered dangerously on the edge of the counter with the extra weight and the momentum in which everything was dumped in.
Cardina yelped, holding the bowl with his hips as he dumped the rest of the stuff in, then hurriedly set the empty one down and moved the full one back to safety. That was entirely too close, he thought, and, because everything was so full, he decided to hand mix it rather than use the machine.
Twenty minutes, a sore arm, and an egg yolk stain on the front of his shirt later, he put the spoon he was using down, and was digging out the other mixer, wondering if it would be okay to use one beater, seeing as the other wasn’t where it needed to be. He decided it would be better than nothing, and plugged it in, at the last second deciding to put it on the lowest speed possible, which turned out to be the right move, seeing as how fast even that spun everything around.
Somehow, he managed to pull it off, and had a cake mix that looked as perfect as everything he found on the internet. Satisfied, he grabbed one of their cake pans and poured it in, which ended up needing to be split into two with the amount of batter he had left, but he thought that would be fine; that meant more cake for the man he loved more than anything. Cardina quickly scanned over the last bit of Jean’s messages, and decided to set a timer on his phone for when it would be ready, and popped them in the oven once it was ready.
While everything cooked, he cleaned everything up, himself included. He didn’t want to take off the shirt, seeing as it was comfortable and smelled like Marco, so he just brushed it off the best he could and settled for that being good enough. He did up the dishes, swept the floor, and cleaned off the counters, all while listening to his music, feeling happy and lighter than he had in awhile. He loved the idea of being able to do this for the love of his life, to be able to surprise him with nice things like this, and thought maybe, if this went over well, he could start asking Jean for more advice on how to cook things.
He hadn’t been keeping track of time, and only realized that something might be wrong when he began to smell something burning, and panicking a bit, checked the timer to realize that he hadn’t actually hit start. Cardina screamed, quickly shutting the oven off and grabbing the nearest cloths he could find to pull the pans out, cussing quietly to himself when the heat from the metal burned through the dishcloths and burned his fingers. He quickly set them on the counter to cool off, and his heart completely sank when he realized that they were all but ruined. The tops of the cakes looked more like charcoal, or the tops of their brownies than they did a lemon cake, and he sighed, his good mood completely destroyed.
He couldn’t even bring himself to ask Jean for help, he was so humiliated, and just stood there for several moments, looking at the burned mess of a surprise, and tried not to cry. Who was he kidding thinking he could actually pull this off? Cardina looked around at the decorations, and the happiness that they brought him earlier in the day turned to disgust, and suddenly they looked horrible, too close together and junky, and made him feel like he was trying too hard to impress his boyfriend rather than a genuine expression of his love.
Tears filled Cardina’s eyes, and he had half a mind to tear them all down, but when he got up to do it, a little thought stopped him: how touched Marco would be to see it, even if it was a huge disaster. He took a deep breath and looked around at the decorations one more time before deciding to leave them, wondering to himself how he’d been so lucky as to land someone as forgiving and kind as Marco was.
The cakes still bothered him, though. A lot. He left them where they were for the time being, and grudgingly decided to go out and just buy a cake for him instead. It felt like cheating, but he wanted to make sure Marco actually had something edible. So, Cardina bought a blank cake and a tube of icing, deciding to at least do the decorating on it himself.
~
Marco pulled up several hours later, exhausted from a long shift at the restaurant where he and Jean both worked, having worked a double shift to cover for his friend while he spent the day with his new fiance, Armin, and just sat in his car for a moment and tried to relax. He shrugged off his jacket and smock, and decided, just for the night, to leave his work shoes out in his car so he didn’t have to look at them anymore. Barefoot and exhausted, Marco walked up to the house with a paper bag full of food he’d been able to bring home for he and Cardina to share.
He opened the door, not surprised to find it unlocked already, and stepped inside. The first thing he noticed was the giant banner that said happy birthday written out on the wall behind the couch, and his heart lifted the tiniest bit. He was glad to see that at least someone had remembered his birthday after a long day of being bitched at by angry soccer moms on their lunch breaks, and then he realized that the rest of the room was decorated with streamers and even more banners.
“Car?” he called, the tiniest hint of a smile lighting up his face as he hung his keys and smock up on the hook by the door. “Did you decorate all of this?”
Cardina appeared in the doorway, then, and Marco couldn’t help but laugh at him when he saw how much of a mess he looked. His face, despite his best efforts to clean it off, still had flour smudges on it, and he noticed a few white spots in his ponytail that he hadn’t seen that morning, too. His shirt, he realized, was all but ruined, with flour and egg stains covering the front, but he couldn’t bring himself to be too upset with him.
“Hey,” Cardina replied, hurrying up to him and kissing him softly on the cheek. “Happy birthday.”
“Thanks.” Marco grinned, holding up the bag of food. “I brought dinner, in case you haven’t eaten yet. I’m sorry I’m home so late.”
“Don’t be!” Cardina said quickly, taking the bag from him in one hand, and his boyfriend’s hand in the other. “Come with me, we’ll heat this up and celebrate a little while you’re still awake.”
Marco let himself be led through the house to the kitchen, and felt his heart swelling even more when he realized that the whole house had been decorated for the occasion as streamers brushed against the top of his head. “You were busy today.” He commented happily.
“I was.” Cardina grinned, hurrying over to the microwave and pulling out the to-go containers to heat up. “Very, very busy, actually, and I think I deserve a kiss or two for my efforts.” He teased, unable to help himself.
Marco spied the cake sitting on the counter as Cardina spoke, and a huge grin lit up his face at the sight when he read the inscription on it. “I think you’ve earned a bit more than that…” He murmured, popping the lid off the cake and swiping a bit of icing off of the bottom corner, just so he could taste it. “This is good. Where’d you get it from?”
“The little grocery store down the street, I don’t remember the name. The new one.” Cardina replied, peeking back at him and feeling his mood lift the tiniest bit when he noticed how happy Marco looked over his cake. That was something, at least. “Do you like it?”
“I do!” Marco said, part of him wanting to be selfish and skip dinner just so he could tear into the cake and taste it. He still couldn’t believe that Cardina had gone through all of that trouble just for him, and it was touching in a way that he couldn’t describe. “Thank you, you have no idea how much I needed this after today.”
“I think I can guess, based on the look on your face when you were coming up to the house.” Cardina replied, putting the first of the dishes in the microwave before coming back over to sit with him for a moment. “Bad day?”
“No worse than usual,” Marco shrugged, leaning over and giving Cardina a kiss on the cheek. “Just a really rude party at lunch, and a couple different nasty ones during the dinner rush. But it’s okay.”
Cardina scowled hearing that, hating that Marco had to deal with that almost every day, and scooted his chair over closer to him so he could touch him, to comfort him as much as he could. “Screw them. How was it aside from that?”
Marco thought about that for a moment, not wanting to keep complaining about his day, and smiled a little when he realized that something good did happen. “It was worth taking the double shift.” He explained. “I guess Armin asked Jean to marry him tonight.”
“Really?” Cardina smiled, feeling a small wave of happiness wash over him for their friends, making a note to text them both in the morning to say congratulations, and ran his hand comfortingly over Marco’s back. “Good for them.”
“Yeah, I was relieved when Jean messaged me. It’s been too long co-” Marco broke off, then, his face scrunching up in confusion when he spotted their two cake pans half hidden behind a loaf of bread. “Car, what’s that?” He asked, pointing.
Cardina’s heart sank again when he realized that Marco had seen his failure, and with a sad sigh, went over to get the pans. “I tried to make you a cake this morning.” He explained. “But I think I’m just going to have to accept the fact that cooking isn’t what I’m best at.”
Marco’s heart swelled with even more love for his boyfriend when he heard that, and got up to stand with him, slipping his arms around him from behind and pressing a kiss to the back of his shoulder as he looked over the cakes. “What kind is it? Chocolate? It looks good.”
Cardina winced a bit when Marco said that, and shrank into himself some. “It… was supposed to be lemon. Your favorite.”
“Cardina…” Marco murmured, touched that he remembered that little detail, and squeezed him tight around the middle before pulling back and going to grab a knife from the drawer. He grabbed one of the pans and began to cut the cake out, much to Cardina’s dismay. He ignored his pleas for a moment and cut the top layer off, smiling a bit to himself when he saw the cake underneath the burn was still perfectly edible. “Well, look at that!” He smiled, his gaze flickering to the other man. “My boyfriend was sweet enough to bake me a perfectly edible cake for my birthday!”
Cardina’s lip wobbled a little when he heard that, and met Marco’s eyes for a second before the tears started to form, and he tried desperately to blink them back. He really had no idea how lucky he was to have someone as positive as Marco, and the fact that he’d even thought about trying to salvage the cake was making him more emotional than he could believe.
“Do you have any frosting for these?” Marco asked, fixing up the other cake as well.
“No, I… didn’t get that far. I saw they were ruined and completely gave up.”
Marco thought for a second before pulling out his phone, tapping around on it for a second before he found a good recipe for homemade frosting, and showed it to Cardina. “Want to make some?” He asked, smiling at him encouragingly.
With a little smile of his own, Cardina nodded, and while Marco got everything together, he went to get his plate out of the microwave so Marco could eat while they got started, and put his own in to get cooking. Once it was in, he grabbed his phone and put on the same playlist as before, hoping to improve both of their moods some while they got ready.
Marco grabbed himself a fork from the drawer and took a bite of food while he read over the recipe, nodding to himself and thinking that it would be fairly easy for them to do if they did it together. He smiled even more when he realized what song was playing, and shot a loving look towards Cardina, incredibly grateful for him and thinking he was so lucky to have such a thoughtful partner to spend the rest of his life with. “Hey, Car?” He started as the blonde made his way over to him.
Cardina slipped his arms around Marco’s waist and kissed him softly on the cheek. “What’s up?”
“I love you.” Marco said honestly, looking over at him again and feeling his heart swelling with affection. “I really, really love you, you know that, right?”
Hearing those three little words coming from Marco, even though they’d both exchanged them thousands of times over the last year, never, ever failed to send butterflies swarming in Cardina’s stomach, and he squeezed Marco a bit tighter around the middle when he heard them to confirm that he knew. “I love you, too, Mar.” He breathed, kissing him on the side of the head. “I really, really love you, too.”
“Good. As long as you know.” Marco grinned, leaning into the other man’s embrace for a few seconds before getting started on making up the frosting for them.
Cardina watched as Marco took control of the kitchen, providing support where he could, and found himself beyond grateful for Marco Bodt, for being such a generous, loving person, who genuinely appreciated a failed effort at making his birthday something special. He smiled, watching as he moved around the kitchen, humming along to the music and smiling hugely whenever their eyes met, and thought that, maybe, it hadn’t been such a bad attempt after all.
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kweebtrash · 5 years
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Eres Mia (M)
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Messy Chapter 8
Pairing(s): OC X Johnny
Genre: College AU, Fuckboy AU, Angst, Smut, a smidge of fluff/awkwardness
Summary: Fuckboys are basically good for one thing. You hit it and quit it- except when his voice draws you in, his body keeps you there, and dumb ass feelings linger making things particularly messy.
Warnings: mentions of drugs/alcohol, talks about suicide, the teeeeniest bit of violence, possibility of emotional manipulation, jealousy/possessiveness
Features: unprotected sex, creampies, rough fingering/finger sucking, oral/throat fucking, a little hint of bondage, rough hair grabbing, squirting, overstretching/gaping, daddy/princess dynamics, choking, relentless/brutal/deep thrusting, a bit of overstimulation/multiple orgasms, also being covered in cum
Word Count: 21,103K
A/N: So explanation about this chapter: It has some cultural references that maybe not everyone will get but I can explain them if anyone wants to send me a question about it. If you haven’t figured it out (or even just made a generalization) Eri is afro-carribean (the exact island is left vague on purpose, but it would be in the latinx part of the cluster). There’s also spanish in the chapter and tbh use google translate and if you still have problems again just message me.
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The Boys Group Chat
Taeyong: 5
Lucas: what???
Ten: 5 what?
Taeyong: my score with Eri is at 5.
Lucas: HOLY FUCK
Taeil: OHHH HOW THE TABLES HAVE TURNED.
Ten: how?? When??? What???!
Taeyong: last night. Shower. Against the wall. In the bed twice. And our usual against the door.
Lucas: how tf did u manage that??
Lucas: i thought you hated her
Taeyong: i never hated her. It was just the drama and shit
Taeyong: like at the party i just didn’t want a fight to break out. i didn’t want the cops called or anything
Taeyong: so like i kicked her out but it was just because i knew she would have thrown the first punch
Lucas: well you aren’t really wrong
Lucas: i don’t blame you for not wanting the cops to show up
Taeyong: i had under 21 friends there. I didn’t want them to get in trouble
Ten: how did you even manage to get her to fuck you???
Taeyong: she called me actually. She was drunk af but sobered up before she got here
Ten: i cannot believe
Ten: i haven’t even been able to get with her AT ALL lately
Johnny: wtf is going on
Taeil: oooooooffff this is….
Ten: the tea brews itself
Johnny: Taeyong what did you say
Taeyong: i fucked your girl. She came to me instead of coming to you
Yuta: dude this is…
Johnny: don’t go near her again
Johnny: i mean it
Taeyong: dude i’m not scared of you
Taeyong: yall arent even official
Johnny: i don’t care
Johnny: dont touch her
Yuta: johnny quit it
Yuta: you can’t hog her to yourself
Yuta: just like jae can’t hog quinn
Ten: just admit ur jealous and move on.
Johnny: im not jealous
Johnny: you just dont deserve her after the stunt you pulled at the party
Taeyong: clearly i do because shes been thinking about fucking me for a long time
Taeyong: maybe even while shes been fucking you.
(Johnny has left the chat)
Ten: fuck
Yuta: this is getting fucking ridiculous
Yuta: i mean she texted me like when she was with him i think
Yuta: like she didnt care that she was with him and was being cute with me
Lucas: she flirts with everyone
Lucas: do you think she does actually wanna be with him?
Taeyong: who cares
Taeyong: fact of the matter is shes up for grabs
Taeyong: and if I wanna go after her i will
Yuta: WHOA WHOA
Yuta: you mean try and date her?
Ten: taeyong thats not a good idea
Taeyong: i never said id date her
Taeyong: but if shit happens, shit happens
Taeyong: thats all im saying
It was strange waking up in bed next to Taeyong. We had never done that before especially since the last time we were together we had to leave the office quickly. He looked strangely innocent when he slept, his shaggy hair ruffled and sticking up in random places and lips slightly pouted. I watched his chest rise and fall with each soft breath for a moment while I tried to keep my head from spinning. This…might have been a bad idea. I was in my feelings for Johnny and I knew that I only hooked up with Taeyong as a sort of rebound/revenge plot. I didn’t want to tell him that but I was sure we were still platonic enough that it didn’t matter. Taeyong wouldn’t make things weird or messy. This would just be a one time thing…or a five time thing. We may have gotten a bit carried away. He was tentative in the shower, making sure that I was still sober enough to be okay. He washed me, helped me wash my hair, and let the heated water run over me to warm me up. And when he slid down to wash my legs his lips met between my thighs and I couldn’t help but give in to his tongue.
He was no Taeil but he knew enough to make me try and steady myself against the slippery tile and grip onto his hair tightly. It was relaxing to finally get off by being eaten out, to just sit back and let him do all the work. It was definitely something I missed. After the shower, we dried off and he put me into some of his pjs (which were tight as all hell on me) and we relaxed in his bed. I got some more water in me and slowly weaned off the rest of the alcohol. Somewhere in the middle of trying to sleep we got lost in each other’s lips which somehow lead to him keeping me against his bedroom wall and fucking me as deep as he could go. Mid morning came and we didn’t want to get up. So of course the next option was to 69 then fuck me into the mattress. Just when I thought I would finally be able to leave he wouldn’t stop kissing me as I got to his bedroom door and we had a proper deja vu moment of last semester.
By the time I actually got home it was late at night and I was sore as all hell. I left him covered in hickies, scratches, and bite marks- my typical calling card- and he left me wanting to sleep for days. I collapsed on my bed unmoving for hours on end and barely making it to class the next day. Johnny was there of course and I tried my best to avoid him like the plague. That was always the hardest part. When we were on our highs, being next to each other radiated chemistry and we would rather pass the time sexting than paying attention. When we were on our lows, everything was ice cold and I detested even being within his vicinity. He still wouldn’t open up to me or even let me tell him that it was okay to cry. He didn’t need to worry about that with me. Of course he wouldn’t listen and we were stuck in a frozen tundra that didn’t let us move one way or the other. I tried my best to instead focus on studying for once. My grades were alright but they could definitely be better and I didn’t want to have to waste more money repeating classes. I spent my nights hitting the books and hoping I could retain enough information to pass. I was holed up in my room as usual when I heard knocking on the front door and i wondered if maybe Quinn forgot their keys. It seemed a little early for them to come home from being with Jae. I set my textbook down onto my desk and padded towards the living room. When I opened the door I hated what I saw.
His eyes were bright red and he reeked of menthol and weed. He leaned against the door frame, a big grin on his face that happiness didn’t seem to be the cause of. “What are you doing here?” I whispered in disbelief.
“What am i doing here?” He licked his lips and chuckled. “What are you doing fucking Taeyong?”
My eyes went wide. “Did he…did he tell you?”
“He told everyone in our chat. 5 times, huh? That a record or something?”
I backed away from him hating how he was acting and being hurt that what I did was blasted over some group chat. I couldn’t believe Taeyong would do something like that. I had stated plenty of times who i had hooked up with but it was on my terms, with my permission, not like gossiping around a watering hole. “You need to leave.” I swallowed hard and didn’t look at him. My voice was too unsteady for that.
I heard the door snap shut and looked up to find him looming over me. “Not a chance. Not until I make you forget all about that stupid bastard.”
He grabbed onto my sweater and pulled me towards him, easily overpowering me to crash his lips against mine. I clawed at his coat, digging into the soft fabric as I tried forcing myself away. I slammed the side of my fist into his chest and pushed him back. “NO! You don’t get to do this! You don’t get to come back into my life whenever you decide to! I’m not something to have at your convenience and I sure as hell don’t need you to keep leading me on.”
“Leading you on? Where am I leading you too?” His hands still had a hold of my neck and shoulders which I could not shake.
I could feel the tears already trying to come forth but i grounded myself, dug deep within me to stop them. “Leading me to you. I always get led back to you.”
“You don’t want to get led back to me.” He laughed. “I’m fuckin’ useless!”
I grabbed at his hands, wanting them off me. “Stop that! I’m not your fucking therapy and my purpose is not to fix you.”
“I don’t want to be fixed! I want to be fucked!”
“And that’s another layer to your goddamn problem, Johnny! Life isn’t all about diving into sex to make yourself forget! You need to reevaluate what’s going on in your life before you put your hands on someone else’s.”
“I don’t want you to have Taeyong on you.” He kissed me, gentler this time. “Or Lucas.” Another kiss. “Or Taeil.” A small lick. “Or Yuta.” He sucked on my bottom lip for a second before kissing me again. “Or anyone else.”
“You cant have me all to yourself. That isn’t how this works. You don’t want me, you only want what you see on the surface. You don’t give a shit about what’s beneath and you definitely don’t want to see it.”
He released me from his grasp and scoffed. “The surface? I’ve let you dig inside my brain more than anyone else in my life. You’re stuck inside there now, you can’t move. You know how sick i’ve felt, how weak i am, how less of a man i am-”
“Save that bullshit, Johnny! It’s not true! I told you it was okay to cry! It doesn’t mean you’re less of a man! It just means you’re a normal human being. Men can cry. Men can show emotion and they should. I just wanted to help…to be there for you.”
“You’re wrong. I’ve always had to be the man. There wasn’t any room for me to cry!” He screamed. “You want to talk about not wanting what’s beneath the surface? You’re already there, Eri. You’ve seen everything I could possibly hate to show anyone.”
“And yet you’re coming to me just so you can be buried inside something for an hour or two. That’s what it’s actually like to feel useless and discarded. I know you don’t fucking care and you never will.”
“This is starting to get messy…it’s a clusterfuck and it keeps growing.”
“You just keep fueling the fire.” I said. “I’m not going back. I can’t. My heart can’t take it. I hate seeing you like this. I hate hearing you like this and I want to help. I really do. But i can only take so much before you start swallowing me whole.”
He grabbed me again, pressing me against the door and trapping me between it and his body. “This is how you help.” His breath was heavy against my neck, tickling the sensitive skin there. I shuddered and failed to squirm away from him. “I know you’re not going to fix me. I can do that on my own, eventually, but right here, right now this is what I want.”
“Well i don’t.” The tears fell and i slammed my fist back against the door, pissed entirely that it was happening again. I shouldn’t be crying over him anymore. “I don’t want to be what you push inside of. You don’t want to know what’s really going on with me. You’d run away from me as much as I want to run from you.”
“You think i’d be scared of what you’ve done? What you’ve been through? Its nothing, Eri.” He grabbed my chin and and jerked my head to the side so he could growl in my ear. “I want you. Raw. Dirty.”
“You want me black out drunk? You want me with a broken hand through drywall? You want me bleeding out in a tub with a knife in my hand? You want me laying on the floor unable to breathe and falling in and out of consciousness? You want me running away from the one good thing i’ve ever had in my life?” My voice trembled again. “You want me hiding who i really am from my family? You want me watching myself be the cause of people’s hurt? Because that’s what’s really raw and dirty. Or do you just want to fuck as always?”
He hoisted me onto his waist suddenly, crushing me now to the point where i could barely breathe. I wrapped my legs around his as he shoved his forehead against mine. “Give me it. Give me all of it, Eri.”
I tried not to kiss him, i really did, but my heart shoved me towards it. My tongue slid out to creep into his mouth which he warmly accepted. It was angry, heated, rushed, and broken- like the entirety of our relationship. I was clutching onto him desperately as if I was trying to shock my system back into loathing him. It didn’t matter if I made drunken mistakes or if he made drugged out ones, every time, we somehow found a way back to each other as if we were tied with a string of fate. “Why?” I whispered when I finally caught my breath. “Why don’t you talk to me? For weeks at a time…it hurts…”
“Because i hate the way I feel about you.” He panted.
I licked my lips and hovered them over his. “How do you feel about me?”
He shook his head. “I…don’t worry about it. I’m faded as fuck right now. It won’t matter what I say.”
“Clearly it fucking does.”
“It’s only gonna get more fucked up between us.”
“It already is fucked up! Were fucked up! This whole shit is fucked up! We were supposed to hook up at the summer party and that’s it!!”
“Yeah and here you are fucking Taeyong and Yuta and whoever else you’d let inside you.”
I slapped him. The first time i’d ever wanted to hit him at all. I would’ve never laid a hand on him especially after all he had been through- i never wanted to be that person. Ever. But he crossed a fucking line and that small dangerous part of my brain was a ticking time bomb. He dropped me then and I fell right on my ass. I scrambled to get up as he stood there motionless.
“Dont…dont ever do that.” He whispered harshly.
“I didn’t want to! But don’t you ever come for who I sleep with! You don’t get to do that! You don’t get to be a hypocrite because you’re fucking jealous! What are you even jealous for? I’m not your girlfriend!”
“AND YOU NEVER WILL BE!”
I felt a stab of pain through my chest that hurt worse than anything I had ever felt before. Was this…was this what Jungwoo felt? Had karma finally come to get me and pay me back for what I did to him all those years ago? It felt like I couldn’t breathe but I could definitely feel the tears flowing down my cheeks like a river. His eyes went wide and he took a step towards me. I took one back before sprinting to my room. I slammed the door shut, pressing myself against it and sliding to the floor.
He pounded his fists against it, begging me to open it. I was afraid he was going to break through the wood with how hard he was rattling the door. I pulled my knees to my chest and buried my face in my thighs, staining my pajamas pants with tears.
“I-im sorry, ok?”
No you’re not.
“I didn’t mean for it to be like this.”
Well it is now, so fuck you.
“I don’t know what I really want, Eri.”
I guess…i don’t really know either. Should you even be my boyfriend at this point? What would I do once I had you? Would my fear of love go away? Or would you make it worse?
“I like when we spend time together. You’re cool as fuck but we…we cant be like that. You know that right? I don’t get with people and stay with them. We can only fuck…”
I hate you. Go away. Leave me alone.
“I guess i’m broken or whatever you want to call it but i’m not a charity case. I don’t want you to pity me or feel like you have to take care of me. Like you said, it’s not your job. But for right now…this is how I handle stuff, just like how you handle stuff your way, you know?”
By being a drunk partied out mess, i know. Hungry for attention, starving for someone to care for them, and completely barren of love but wanting to fill that void somehow.
“I’m not fine. I haven’t been fine for a long time. My anxiety never used to be this bad. I never even used to have night terrors or panic attacks. It just got worse after…after the first time i got…you know, what I told you about before. Then college happened and it was so much pressure and I wanted to make my mom proud and happy and take care of her because my dad never did. You know even when i felt so fucking empty around Rixi, i didn’t sleep for 2 whole days because I was studying my ass off for midterms just to keep my straight A’s?” He let out a soft chuckle. “I have a 4.0, hookup with dozens of girls, work three jobs, go to the gym, and try and do my art. When i say that i run on energy drinks and coffee i’m not kidding.”
That’s adding to your anxiety, stupid. And so is the weed. And your inability to FUCKING communicate. Why do you have to be such a stupid dumb….MAN all the time?!
“I know that doesn’t matter to you-”
It does because I know you’re hardworking and care about what you do. You’re a passionate soul and i love that about you. You’re so dedicated.
“But i dont know…i guess I wanted to tell you anyway. I’m not making excuses. I know what I do is my own damn fault but i just wanted you to know.”
I shifted slightly and reached up for the door handle, scooting away to pull it open slightly. I peeked my head through the gap and he looked at me, eyes a bit puffy as if he had been crying too. He wiped his nose and made it seem like he was put together in his typical Johnny fashion. I still didn’t say anything but he crept his hand closer to me and extended his pinky. I looked at it for a few seconds before locking mine around it. He was quiet for a bit, the tension remaining thick and heavy. The quietness was only interrupted by a few sniffles from the both of us. I wiped away at my tears, wanting to remind myself that this was proof. This was what always happened. Either i ended up drunk or ended up crying when it came to him. Or both for that matter.
I truly felt like i should continue to make myself suffer with him. One look of those soft brown eyes and honey-sweet lips would draw me in and his soothing voice would whisper caring thoughts and expressions. I saw the blushes he had when he talked to me, the way he seemed embarrassed or nervous, but there were always underlying signs that proved he didn’t like me. Most blatantly when he said-no, yelled- that i would never be his girlfriend. Logic told me to run. When had i ever put a man before me or anyone for that matter? Masochism told me that I enjoyed the pain of being rejected over and over again and that it was a game. Lust told me that i loved when he got jealous and growled in my ear. I wanted him to tell me that I was his as he fucked me so deep and hard that I couldn’t move. Greed told me that I wanted him all to myself. I wanted all the attention, all the love, all of him. The good, the bad, and the ugly. And rationality? That bitch was nowhere to be found.
“What saved you…when you tried to um…kill yourself?”
My head snapped up at the question. It hadn’t been posed to me since I met Quinn three years ago. It was something that I blocked from my brain and never reopened. But this was a test, to see if he could really handle what was fucking wrong with me. I squeezed his pinky tighter and finally croaked. “Daniella. She’s uh…she’s my little sister. I traumatized a 10 year old by bleeding out in a bathtub and she called the police and my mom. She tried to stop the bleeding. She cried but she kept pushing through. She was….so mature in that moment. More than I had ever been. She wanted to be there when they admitted me. My mom didn’t believe what was going on- more so in a sense that she didn’t want to believe that her kid was sick. Just like she didn’t want to believe I was gay at first. Eventually, she saw past it. She saw how much I needed her and how much we didn’t want to lose each other. But yeah…that was…it was Dani.”
“You know, her Quinceanera is in a week and I can’t believe she’s already 15. It’s weird how time flies…how I can’t exactly remember it all.” I continued.
“Are you going? To the party i mean.” He asked.
I nodded. “I have to. I’m like in the…so it’s basically almost like a bridal party. It’s real weird. But they pair us up and we walk down an aisle and Dani will come out with her big poofy dress and everyone will look at her and sing ’Las Mañanitas’ blah blah blah. It’s a precursor wedding and weird tradition I hated. So i never had one. And now, mom gets to put all her spite of her not having one and me not having one into an over the top expensive party for Dani, but you know…don’t help me with my student loans or anything.”
“Oh…sounds like a…journey.” I let out a small laugh and he crept closer towards the gap. I opened the door a little bit more. “It was my mom for me.”
“What?” I whispered.
“I was ready to jump off my school building after I got with her. I would see her everywhere on my social media and around town. I had to hide everything about how she made me feel and I felt like I just couldn’t deal with it anymore. I sat on the ledge for a long time, thinking about it and staring at the ground. Just as I decided I was going to jump, I got a text from my mom. It said ‘hi honey, hope you have a great day at school! I love you a lot.’” He rubbed at his eyes and looked away from me. “I still have it saved on my phone- transferred over each time I got a different one. I look at it sometimes when i feel like utter shit. Then I call her.” He sighed deeply and I pulled him closer to me, the door falling open wider. “Have I ever told you thank you?”
“W-what?” I asked, stunned.
“Thank you. For being there for me. When shit hit the fan basically. You and Jae pretty much helped me through a lot. Is that like…a part of working through this? Admitting when you’ve been helped?”
I nodded. “It’s a start…”
He got even closer and kissed me, our pinkies tightening and lips slow and steady. My will was wavering and I was kicking myself again. It never failed. I pulled away and turned my head away from his. He sighed and kissed my cheek. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry doesn’t make up for a lot of things, Johnny.”
“I know, princess. I know.”
“No, you don’t get to say that word to me anymore. That part is done. It’s only for people who know how to communicate.”
“Ok…” he said simply.
I let go of his hand and moved away from the door. He came through fully, sitting beside me now and set his arm around my waist. He kissed my temple then rested his chin on my shoulder. We stood quiet for a moment, trying to process everything. Nothing had gotten better at all. Everything was more confusing and more painful. I didn’t feel good and I didn’t want him here but at the same time I did. I looked over at his sad eyes, knowing he was truly sorry but still cementing the fact that I would never be his. Hurting was all I was good for and I accepted the karmic punishment.
I grabbed onto his shoulders and his eyes drew themselves to me. I laid nothing but whispers against his lips drawing him in to press himself against me and steal my breath away in a kiss. Gradually, our clothes began disappearing until we were naked in my bed, hands between each others thighs, stroking and thrusting until we were dirty with each other’s release. He didn’t let me go instead opting to grab my hips and keep me flush against me. “I want me on you. Not any of those assholes.”
“I’m not yours…”
“Tonight you are.” He dug his blunt nails into my hips and sunk his teeth into the base of my neck. It hurt with how hard he was biting down but I knew what he was doing; marking me so that whoever i was with next could see the deep bruise he was trying to leave behind. I clawed at his shoulders, whimpering pathetically and about to beg him to stop but he pulled away, pressing softer kisses to the deep marks instead. I shoved his head away seeing the playful smirk he had on his face.
“Ass…”
“You want a bite mark on your ass too?” he asked coyly.
I rolled my eyes and commanded him to get a towel to clean up the mess he made on my stomach. He gave me another kiss before scooting off the bed and heading towards my door. For a moment I thought I imagined it and had to blink twice but i saw him licking his fingers- the same ones that were inside me just a minute ago. He had never done that. Usually he’d wipe them on my sheets or something. I laid back and closed my eyes, tossing away any ideas of what that meant. I felt him on the bed again, gently wiping away his cum off my skin before laying himself between my thighs, his head on my chest. That also surprised me and i wished I knew what the fuck was going on in his head. Was it from all the weed? I didn’t really know how much he smoked before he got here. It could’ve been what helped set off his emotions and express his jealousy about Taeyong.
I wanted to pry at his stupid decisions and actions some more but I was slowly running out of energy to deal with arguing, anxiety, and my mood swings in such a short amount of time. I decided to lay in my self hatred with Johnny on top of me, our breaths flowing together into an easier rhythm. I closed my eyes and set my hand on his head. “Pet my hair.” He grumbled.
“You think that a half fuck is going to solve this?” I said, ignoring his request.
“No. We’re doing what we do best, hurting each other.”
“But why does it have to be like this?”
“Because it’s just who we are, Eri. It’s what we do. It’s how we function together. You want to call it off?”
“Call what off?”
“Being fuck buddies.” Yes was what I should have said. Instead, I shook my head and kept my eyes away from him. “Good…Because I don’t want to stop fucking you.”
“I don’t either…” I said softly. I ran my fingers through his hair now, pushing it back and feeling his sides that were grown out. "Remember when you asked me to feel alive?”
He nodded.
“Do that for me. Maybe me feel like I don’t fucking hate you for what you’ve done. Like i don’t want you more than I need to.”
He stilled against me and didn’t say anything. I could feel him looking at me and when I finally had the courage to meet his eyes I saw that he seemed to be hurt by my confession. Eventually, he mumbled a response. “I don’t want you to hate me.”
"Mostly i hate myself.” I hate myself for loving you.
“Dont, baby…” He turned my face towards his to continue our kiss. “You don’t need to hate yourself.”
“Just shut up, Johnny. Fuck me already.”
“Fine.” He growled and gave quick bites over my breast making me arch against him. I hissed slowly, gripping onto his shoulders and digging my nails into his skin. He morphed his bites into kisses, working to gather my nipple in his mouth to suck slowly but hungrily. Eventually, his kisses got even lower as he discarded my breasts in favor of moving down to the softness of my stomach. A little nibble beneath my rib cage jerked my body towards his mouth, edging my hips into eager swivels. I parted my lips to let out a sweet sigh and a small plead for him to keep going. His tongue dipped into my belly button, making me squirm against the wet heat. I inched my hands back to his hair to return him to my lips and stop his teasing but he had other plans. His hands suddenly came crashing down on my wrists, pinning them to the bed and practically crushing them. I winced at the pain and asked him to ease up but he only snapped at me.
“Shut up and don’t touch me, got it?”
“W-what are you doing?” I asked, nervously.
“Shut. Up.”
I squeezed my eyes shut tight, swallowing hard and full of worry more than sensuality. I tried taking deep breaths but I felt like I was getting more nervous. Johnny was quiet as ever but I could feel his breath tickling against my sensitivity. I licked the dryness from my lips and just as I was about to try and pull away from his hands I felt it. It was small and gentle, just the tip of his tongue working over my clit. My entire body tensed and I remained frozen in place. I feared scaring him, or worse, triggering him. We retreated into minutes of silence that made my heart race with worry. “J-Johnny? A-are you-?”
There were butterfly kisses to my clit before his tongue reached out once again. It covered the entirety of my lower lips, pressing a slick heat over me and gathering the cum left behind from his fingering to trail it back to my clit. He trapped the bit of nerves between his lips, suckling lightly. I knew he was being cautious due to nervousness and unease but it was also amazingly tender and sweet. I dug my teeth into my bottom lip and let out a moan hoping that he would take it as praise and a sign to continue. There was another long pause and my fingers curled in anticipation for more but there was nothing. I opened my eyes and looked down at him.
He was stationary, his eyes glancing over my center and lips trembling. The grip on my wrists got tighter, too tight for even my own liking. “Johnny…you need to let me go.” I said softly.
“No. I-i cant…”
“You can stop now, it’s ok but you’re hurting me. Come up here. Come kiss me, baby.” He looked defeated but saw the pain in my face and finally let my wrists go. I didn’t immediately shake out the numbing feeling and instead waited for him to crawl back up my torso. I held onto him as tight as I could, covering his lips, cheeks, neck in excited pecks. He did it. With me. It wasn’t complete or full or satisfying by any means but it meant so much. “You did so good, baby boy. So, so good.” I cooed.
He hid in my neck and whispered, “I’m sorry.”
I shook my head quickly. “Don’t be. It was good. A great start, ok?”
“I wanted to try…a little at least so you don’t feel like i did when we fucked in the bathroom at the party. You shouldn’t want to feel alive with me because you’re numb. I don’t want that at all.”
“I just wanna feel good is all…” I held onto him tighter. “I don’t want to feel like i’m going to be thrown away.”
“I-i wont…” He swiftly slipped out of the bed and returned with a condom on. He whispered as he pulled my legs around him, pressing himself at my entrance. “I wont…”
“But you can’t promise that.” I swallowed hard and felt him sink into me inch by inch. The rest of my thoughts were voided by the methodical pace of him stretching me open. He ignored what I had said and instead focused on kissing everywhere he could reach as he thrusted slowly. My hands traced the length of his spine, resting in the center of his back and keeping him close. Inside my head I pleaded for him to not go slow, to not be intimate and stir up more dreadful feelings inside the pit of my stomach. Please just fuck me so I can be reminded of how shitty you are. Don’t remind me of how cute and caring you can be. I’m begging you Johnny.
I knew he couldn’t hear me so of course he didn’t stop rolling his hips to have his cock hit every space within me. He was panting softly, gentle moans mixing in every once in awhile. They sounded so precious and I couldn’t help but bury myself in his lips again. His hand pulled mine away from his back just so our fingers could intertwine. Nonono, stop that. For the love of god don’t do this to me.
He squeezed my hand tight and I felt my tears resurface. This is what scared me the most. Not him leaving or him ignoring me or throwing me away. This Johnny, the human, sentimental, emotional man that could have me fall into his arms (and bed) at the snap of his fingers. I was helpless against him and I just craved more and more torture. He kissed away my tears and nudged our foreheads together. “Hey…it’s okay.” He breathed.
It is not okay. It will never be ok. But he took care of me, stilling every so often to regain his composure as i could feel him throbbing and ready for another release. Worst of all was that I wanted him too. I wanted him to feel good, another hurtful self sacrifice because I cared so much about him. I gave him a soft plea to cum for me, which he took instantly. His free hand slipped between us, his thumb pressing small acts of pleasure into my clit as his other hand never left mine. He only squeezed my fingers tighter while my walls squeezed him the same way. Just at the very end his hips made quicker snaps, hitting the back of my thighs and making my back arch from the mattress. And in one fell breath i felt my stomach heat up and the most comforting sensation flowing within me.
My cheeks flushed as I had never felt anything like it before and wondered what the hell did he do differently. Maybe it was because i was so damn love drunk that it made everything seem better when i was with him. It wasn’t until he jerked out of me so harshly that I snapped my thighs shut. “O-ow! Johnny, what the-”
“The condom broke.” He trembled.
“Excuse me?” I couldn’t believe what I had heard.
“Eri. The fucking condom broke.”
I looked down and could see his cum flowing out of me and staining the bed sheets, while the rubber had a slight tear across the tip. Our eyes met and panic slammed into me at full speed. “O-oh my fucking god. Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god.”
“You’re on birth control right?” His voice was an octave or two higher.
“Well no shit! But it doesn’t magically mean it’s 100% full proof! People still get pregnant while on birth control.”
“I’M FULLY AWARE OF THAT ERI.”
“DON’T YELL AT ME.”
“I’M SORRY I JUST…” I noticed him staring at me which made me more uncomfortable.
“What? What else is wrong?” He shrugged but continued to stare. “Johnny. What is it?!”
“Nothing! It’s just…i mean-”
“Oh, you asshole!!” I flung my pillow straight at his face. “I’m literally fucking panicking and you think cumming inside me is hot!!”
“I’M SORRY!!! I’ve never done it before and it just…looks good, ok?!”
“You are the absolute worse and I CANNOT stand you!” I covered my face that was getting heated up by the second. How could he think about that while I was panicking? How could I think it felt good and perfect when i absolutely loathed cum (and was panicking)? We truly were fucking stupid.
“Hey, we’ll be ok. I know we will.” He said softly, reaching for my hand which i pulled away.
“Easy for you to say. You have the easy way out in case that happens.” I grumbled.
He kissed my forehead and laid beside me. “No I don’t, because I wouldn’t leave.”
I turned away from him, shoving my face into the mattress as I felt his cum sticky between my thighs. “Yeah right…”
“I’m serious….i’m not gonna be like my dad.”
“Alright well, we’re gonna stop talking about this. I’m gonna shower and you can go home so I can die in peace.”
“Don’t be so dramatic. You’re not gonna die. It’s just cum.”
“I’m gay! All I am is dramatic!” I huffed as I felt all flustered now and wanted to get away from him. I stood up and cringed at the feeling of it sliding down my leg now. I awkwardly shuffled to pick up my already cum covered towel just to keep me decent enough to get to the bathroom.
“Can you stop saying that? Because i’m like…not a girl.”
I looked back at him. “Well no fucking shit, Johnny. It’s just a blanket term because you wouldn’t understand everything I identify as. Just roll with it. I don’t have time to explain.”
I grabbed my phone and went to the bathroom, locking the door tight. I tossed off my towel and turned on the water, sitting in the tub under the spray so i could suffer in silence. Eventually i ended up plugging the drain so i could sit in hot water for a bit and try and calm my nerves. I tried calling Quinn but didn’t get an answer, even texted them and still got nothing. They were still probably up Jaehyun’s ass or Taeil or someone else. I don’t know. I dialed again and waited patiently.
“Hello?”
“Doyoung, I need you please.”
“Be right there.”
He hung up as that was all he needed to know that something was wrong. I washed up, making sure to get as much of the cum out of me as possible, then rinsed and dried off. As i opened the bathroom door, Johnny was standing in the doorway, hand raised as he was going to knock. I glared at the lit blunt between his lips.
“’M leavin’.”
“Good. Bye. I have someone else coming over.”
He scoffed. “Wow. Okay. Fuck you too.” He turned away from me and headed towards my front door slamming it harshly behind him.
He made me so fucking irritated with his hot and cold bullshit. I trudged to my room and tossed my towel in the hamper, picking up my discarded pajamas and putting them back on. Around 15 or so minutes later Doyoung was in my room with an absolute cringey look on his face. “Look, i’m sorry but i needed someone to tell. You and Quinn are my closest friends and they’re not here. Please Doyoung…i know it’s gross.”
“You liked it…” he whispered.
“Please don’t remind me. I hate myself completely.”
“Why do you keep doing this, Eri? You are literally worth more than that.”
“I don’t know! I wish I knew. I wish I could just leave him but I can’t. Every time I’m mad, he shows me that side of him that I absolutely love.”
“That’s emotional manipulation.”
“It is not!” I protested. “Well…uh…maybe it is? But I don’t think he would be doing it intentionally? Why would he? He can get with anyone. He has gotten with a lot of people. I don’t think I would be any different. After all he blatantly said i’d never be his girlfriend.”
“And how did you feel about that?”
“I cried. Instantly. It hurt so fucking bad.”
“So we’ve come to the conclusion that a) he’s a fuckboy, b) he doesn’t want to be with you, c) he’s emotionally manipulative, and d) he couldn’t care less about what transpired tonight.” Doyoung gave me a shady look which made me shrink away like a scolded puppy.
“Well technically he said he would be there for me and then I kicked him out so…”
“And now you’re sticking up for him?”
“I’m not! I’m just stating facts. Doyoung, i know you’re totally and completely right. But i just…it feels weird. It feels different somehow.”
“I’m kind of sick of giving you advice and you ignoring it. It makes it seem like you don’t even care what I say.”
“No i do!” I grabbed onto his arm, sadly. “I do! i swear! I’m just a fucking idiot. I like to fuck up everything and keep myself down.”
“Why can’t you see that there are better people for you? Even ones that are right in front of you?”
I rested my head on his shoulder and set my hand in his, squeezing tight. “Doyoung, how can I…how can I stop when i love him?”
“It’s not easy to stop loving someone but…no offense- well a little offense because this is going to be hard to hear- you stopped loving Jungwoo because he loved you too much, you can stop loving Johnny because you love him too much too. You can run away and leave without giving him any explanation.”
I pulled away from Doyoung completely.
“I’m sorry for saying that and hurting you, but maybe it’s the kind of shit you need to snap out of it.” He pressed a kiss to my forehead. “And if you’re so worried about what might happen I can go to the pharmacy for you.”
“I-i just need time to think…” i said quietly.
“Well, you’ve got three days until it’s ineffective-or less effective or whatever. You can let me know ok?”
I nodded and felt him crush me to his chest. I held onto him for a long time, happy to feel a friends pure love rather than the tainted mess from my heart.
Johnny’s POV
“FUCKING SHIT!” I threw the beer bottle I just finished against my wall, watching it shatter into pieces. What the actual fuck just happened between Eri and I? Tonight was fucked up- no, beyond fucked up to the point where I just ended up more confused and angry then I was before. I paced back and forth across my room while thoughts zoomed in my brain. I tried to break everything down and figure out what i could so I could attempt to get my mind straight.
I was pissed off at Taeyong. He was such a smug little fuck about hooking up with Eri, blasting it all over the chat. And why were they counting how many times they hooked up with her like it was some sort of game? I didn’t want him anywhere near Eri. She was mi-. I stopped pacing for a moment. She wasn’t mine. She is not yours Johnny. She is NOT yours.
My pacing resumed. He didn’t deserve to touch her. And neither did those other assholes. I wanted her to myself. She’s mi-. As i grew close to the door i slammed my head against it, not too hard but enough to try and get it through my skull that Eri was not mine.
I had told her she would never be my girlfriend because I was angry. I knew it hurt her the second it came out of my mouth and I wished I could’ve taken it back. Our conversation was so back and forth she probably thought I was crazy. One minute I was mad, the other I wanted to be with her, comfort her, be inside her and make her feel good. I didn’t want her to feel like shit because of me but I was failing horribly.
What even possessed me to touch her like that? So slow and gentle? It felt like I was having an out of body experience and I watched who I wanted to be for her come out and take over. It was what I wanted to give her for the longest time. Something more stable to hold onto rather than whatever the fuck I was now. But that didn’t go over so well for my feelings. I was faded and more emotional than ever, a bad combination. I wanted to tell her what I felt for her but i don’t even think i’m too sure myself. Feelings were there but what kind? Did I have a crush? I liked her? Wanted to keep being fuck buddies? Did I love her? My body shuddered at the thought. I had never been in love before so how could I know?
I’ve always wanted to be in love and have someone to care about. I knew familiar love and friendship love but not romantic love. I wanted to take my girlfriend to the beach, to Korea, to visit countries across the globe. Take pictures of us for vacation scrapbooks and eat everything we could ever dream of. Go hiking with her and hold her hand so she wouldn’t trip on a branch and hurt herself. Laugh when we thought of a memory we had together or hold her as she cried. But i was also scared shitless of all of that. Could I even be that good of a person to her? I didn’t want to end up being a carbon copy of my dad. Why would I want to be the cause of my love’s suffering and leave them behind with a kid I didn’t care about?
Fuck.
The stupid condom.
I tossed myself onto my bed and groaned. I was scared of that too. I’m only 23 and work at a fucking coffee shop, what the hell was I gonna do with a kid? I’m sure we were gonna be okay but…it still made me a little queasy. Except for the fact that I thought cumming inside her was fucking hot. I was a complete jackass for thinking about it at a time like that but I couldn’t help it. Like me: worried to all hell and back about the condom breaking, also me: holy hell I want to do it again. I facepalmed myself and let out another frustrated groan. I was ready to just throw myself out a window rather than face my embarrassment and mistakes. Now Taeyong was probably going to be up her ass and I swear to god if he got with her I was personally going to go to his apartment and kick his ass.
I sat up and started taking off my clothes, figuring I could just sleep all this shit away and ignore it. I flung everything to a corner of my room and reached over to shut off my desk lamp. I noticed my little keychain that I had got at the bookstore resting on the desk. I picked it up and shut off the light before snuggling deep under the blankets. I kept the keychain close to me thinking of nothing but Eri as I went to sleep.
A week had passed since that weird half fight/half fuck between us and I was starting to get a taste of my own medicine. I hated not hearing from her and I found myself constantly checking my phone to see if by chance I missed anything. She hadn’t even posted on any of her social media that I followed her on. Whenever I would hang out with the guys at lunch none of them talked about her, not even Lucas. I had no idea what was going on. I tried to keep myself busy with school work but found myself thinking of her more than I needed too. Sometimes those thoughts implanted little sinister buds of sinfully delicious fantasies and in the midst of being hurt and confused about where we stood I was jacking off to thoughts of her more than I needed too. It was multiple times a day, whenever I was at home and it was starting to get on my nerves. I shouldn’t have been thinking about her like that when I was the cause of most of this mess but it couldn’t be helped. I was a stupid slut and would rather focus on that then the pain I caused her. I was in the middle of rutting against my hand and mattress only a few seconds away from cumming when my phone beside my pillow lit up. The brightness in the darkness of my room distracted me and I look at the screen, ready to ignore the notification until I saw who it was from. I wiped my hand on my sheets and snatched my phone up, unlocking it and going to the message.
🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: hey
I typed in my simple response quickly.
Hey
🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: come over
Fuck…did she actually want to hook up?
What for babe?
🦇BatOuttaHell🦇:  we need to talk.
🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: asap
Talk about what?
��BatOuttaHell🦇: come over and i’ll tell u dumbass
🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: I mean it
Give me like 15 mins. Im busy
🦇BatOuttaHell🦇: fine but dont keep me waiting.
I bit my lip and set my phone aside. It made me nervous to think about what she wanted to talk with me about. A small part of me was hoping that I could still get laid and have amazing makeup sex. But first…
Eri’s POV
I hated that I had to do this. With every fiber in my entire being. It was definitely up there with one of the worst decisions I would have to make. I didn’t want to talk to him or even make him think that I had forgiven him. I had purposefully ignored him like he had done to me so many times before. Even when he sent me the occasional text I left him on read. It felt good to have that power but I had to cut my reign of terror short when I realized that my problem needed a solution and fast. Time was running out and I exhausted all my resources. I knew I was going to regret this but it had to be done. My stomach was in knots as I waited for him. 15 minutes was a lie, it was over a half hour before he showed up at my place. His hair was damp and he smelled of fresh cologne and soap. I stared at him quizzically when I opened the door. He smiled at me, looking like he was happy to see me while I was mortified to see him. He wasn’t wearing anything fancy either. Just a white crew neck and some skinny jeans and winter coat but he still looked so damn good. Stupid fucker.
“Sooo…” he started, chewing on his bottom lip a little bit. I yanked him into my apartment and dragged him towards my room, slamming the door behind us. “Oh shit, ok.” He grabbed at his shirt, about to take it off when I stopped him.
“No! None of that!” I swatted at his hands. “That’s not what I called you over here for.”
“Oh…” he said, dejected.
I rolled my eyes. “Look, i don’t have any other choice. You were the last person on my list, so don’t like flatter yourself.”
“What is going on? You’re making me suspicious.”
I sighed. “Will you be my boyfriend?” Oh jesus christ no, not what I meant!!
“Excuse me WHAT?!” He screamed.
“AHHH FUCK, I MEANT PRETEND. PREEEETENND. PRETEND TO BE MY BOYFRIEND!!” I tried to correct myself.
“AGAIN, WHAT, AND I CANT STRESS THIS ENOUGH, THE FUCK?!”
“Ugh! Okay okay, back peddling.” I took a deep breath trying not to fuck this up even more than I already had. “Just hear me out ok?”
“You better start talking asap, bro!”
“I need someone to come with me to my sister’s Quinceanera this weekend. I have literally asked every single one of my guy friends and they’re all "conveniently” busy. I seriously need help.“
"Why can’t you take Quinn or something?!”
I sighed. “Johnny, if I show up with a girl as my date my grandparents would disown me and it would make a huge scene at the party and I can’t take that away from Dani. My family has this thing where they obsess over asking me if I have a boyfriend or not. I’m the oldest cousin so according to them I should be married and pregnant by now. My mom tries her best to keep them at bay but if I just show up with someone they will at least be civil for this party. Please. I don’t have anyone else. I wouldn’t be asking you this if it wasn’t a huge deal for me.”
“Well that sounds like a personal problem. Sucks to suck.”
I was shocked that that was actually his response. It was a good effort I guess but I was stuck doing this alone. I hoped to all hell nothing would happen that would ruin this for my little sister. It was completely stupid that my family judged me based on who I loved or wanted to be with, that every question about my life had to revolve around me having a man. It always started with a blanket question, one that seemed innocent enough, but then veered into “when will you get a boyfriend?” territory. Not only that but I still had to be on the down low whenever I was with them. Dani knew and so did my mom who was still working to be supportive but that was it. I knew I couldn’t tell other people in my family. If I went alone I could just suck it up and be miserable the whole time which at this point looked to be my only option. “Sorry to bother you…” I said as i sat down at my desk. I lowered my head onto the top and tried to figure out a way to smooth things over with my family for one night.
“Eri…is this really that serious?”
I raised my head up and looked at him. “Yes. I just want things to go right with this, for her sake. I’m literally the black sheep of the family. I’m darker than everyone, my hair is curlier, i’m queer, i play in a heavy metal band, i’m not ultra feminine, and i’m as far away from traditional as possible.” I tried again to convince him. It was turning out to be more pathetic than I hoped for. “I will promise, like absolutely promise, to be nice and civil with you if you do this for me. Please Johnny?”
“What do I get in return?”
I sighed and rolled my eyes. “Whatever you want. I’m too desperate to fight you on this.”
“Anything I want? You’re serious?” He asked. I could almost see the deviousness going on in his head and instantly regretted it. But I swallowed my pride.
“Anything.”
“Ok. I’ll think about what I want and let you know. I gotta dress up or something?”
“So you’ll do it?” I practically jumped out of my chair.
“Yeah, i’ll do it.”
“Fuck, you stupid bastard! You’re the best!” I threw myself on him, wrapping my arms around his neck in a tight hug. “It’s tomorrow night. We have to drive two hours to get to where I live. It won’t end until late so we can get a motel if we’re too tired to drive back.”
“A motel, huh?”
“Don’t even start, please.” I went to pull away but he set his hand on the small of my back, keeping me close.
“Tell me what you want me to do.” He lowered his head towards mine, getting dangerously close to my lips. I swallowed hard.
“W-well…wear something nice and don’t be an asshole. Um…pretend like I’m the greatest thing to ever grace your life? Hold my hand or something…or hold me in general. Follow all my lies and try to remember them. Be prepared to be grilled by every woman in my family and subject to a bunch of sexist and misogynistic comments from my stupid uncles. They’ll be some kids there running around and loud ass music. Um…you may have to dance with me.”
“Oof…I’m not a great dancer.”
“It’s fine, i don’t dance much either. Oh and don’t get drunk. Oh! And don’t let me get drunk. I think that’s the gist of it. I may think of other stuff on the way there. Is that all ok?”
He cupped my face in his hand while the other held mine. He lowered himself to my lips and kissed me gently, barely teasing my tongue with his own and making my heart feel like it was about to burst. When he pulled away my lips kept following him not wanting to let go. He chuckled softly and looked directly at me. “Mi amor, siento que no puedo vivir sin ti.”
I shoved him away. “BITCH, WHAT THE FUCK?!”
He cackled loudly, clutching at his stomach. “Is that “boyfriend” enough for you?”
“Where the hell did you pull that from?!”
“You said it’s a Quinceanera right? I figured I could put my 6 years of Spanish class to good use. How’d I do?” He was still laughing up a storm while I was ready to call off the whole thing. I couldn’t believe he would be able to possibly understand my stupid family.
“How much do you know?” I asked.
“Enough. I’ll mess up every now and again but I think i could pull off a conversation if I needed to.”
“Christ. Ok…If they say something to you just pretend you don’t know anything. I know they’re gonna talk shit and then you can come back and tell me. That’s all we’re gonna do, ok? Ok. I’m gonna throw up.”
“Why? I won’t mess this up, okay? I know she’s important to you. We’ll be civil remember?”
I looked up at him and nodded. “Thank you, Johnny. Seriously.”
He shrugged and shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “It’s cool. So what time is my hot date picking me up?”
“Probably around 4, i’m sure I’ll need to help set up and stuff. And help with makeup. We can get dressed at the motel because I do not want to walk in heels in the snow and i also don’t want to mess up my dress. Where I live my mom said that the snow is more melted and they have clearer sidewalks so I should be good there.”
“Alright, sounds good…so…what’s our plan for tonight?”
I raised my brow, confused. “What do you mean?”
“I came all the way here and I figured we might…We could practice for being a couple tomorrow.”
“You’re going to give me a bunch of hickies and I can’t have that.”
“That’s the pot calling the kettle black. All you do is bite and scratch like a little chihuahua.” He laughed.
I stomped my foot down and huffed. “I am not a little chihuahua!”
“How about I make them where everyone can’t see? Then we won’t have any problems, hmm?”
I crossed my arms and pursed my lips together, hating how devilishly convincing he could be. He was a natural born flirt and it made me want to punch him. I nibbled my bottom lip contemplating if I should really give him the satisfaction. He pulled his coat off and yanked his shirt over his head, showing me his perfectly toned chest and how low slung his jeans were. Asshole. I grabbed onto the waistband of his jeans and pulled him close so we could crash our lips together. He pushed me back onto the bed and crawled on top of me, shoving his tongue past my teeth and coaxing me to moan in his mouth. I grabbed onto his shoulders and shoved him down so I could roll on top of him. “What’s the real reason you were late?” I asked as I dug my nails into his stomach.
“Jacking off.” He grabbed at my tshirt and tried pulled it up but I shoved his hands away and pinned his wrists down.
“I knew it, pig.”
“You act like you don’t do it. How many times have you showed me what you like doing when you’re alone, hmm? When we facetime and I call you late at night?” He teased.
“Shut up, Johnny. You’re so fucking annoying.” I dove my head down to bite at his chest, leaving harsh kisses in my wake. He tried moving his hands but i kept him pinned, liking the fact that he was the one squirming for once. I moved just a bit lower to land a few bites before licking through the center of his chest and up his throat. His entire body practically caved in on itself with how hard he shuddered.
“Fu-fuck…” He licked his lips and tossed his head back, moaning deeply. I blushed as I watched, feeling myself become victim to how good he looked. I resisted the urge to suck on his neck and went back to his chest, taking his nipple into my mouth. I knew this would truly make him squirm but i didn’t expect how hard his hips would buck. I moved my head away from him to over hover his face.
“You’re not being a very good boy are you?”
He opened one eye to glare at me. “When am I ever?”
“I think I should stop. I’ve got a lot to do tomorrow.”
“Oh don’t you play that game with me, Eri! That’s not fair!”
I moved away from him completely and made my way over to open my bedroom door. “Out.”
He sad up with an incredulous look on his face. “You’re kidding?!”
“You’re being bad so you get nothing. C'mon now.”
“I’ll be good then! Whatever the fuck that means!”
I shook my head. “I’ll pick you up at 4, ok?”
“Fuckin’ hell!” He got up, his jeans visibly tighter and pulled his shirt back over his head. He grabbed his coat and made his way out of my room with the biggest pout on his face. Just as he had stepped out of the door frame he turned back to me. “Can I ask you something?” He propped his forearm above his head on the frame and looked down at me.
“What?”
“Besides us freaking out…did you…did you like it when I came inside you?
My entire face felt like it was on fire and took a step back as if that would somehow prevent him from seeing my embarrassment. "I-i-i-i have n-noooo idea what you’re t-talking about!” I stuttered.
“I mean, did you like the way it felt inside you? Like how hot or how deep it was?”
“Please stop talking!” My voice was now a squeaky whisper.
Johnny smirked and ran his tongue over his teeth. “I guess that answers my question, doesn’t it? See ya tomorrow, Eri. And don’t forget, you owe me one.” He winked at me and headed towards my front door, leaving me more flustered than ever.
I spent the whole two hour ride telling him about which one of my aunts would grill him the most and which cousin got pregnant first and who’s baby daddy was a complete failure and which of my uncles was most likely to get drunk and cause a scene. I was sure he wouldn’t remember any of it but I was trying to over prepare him for the shit show that was my family. I also needed him to make a good impression so it would look like he was actually happy to be dating me. Fake dating me of course. We checked into the motel first and I spent most of my time being frustrated with my hair and trying to curl it the way I wanted it. It just barely cooperated and i wasted about half a can of hairspray trying to keep everything in place.
My makeup was more softer and neutral than normal to go with my pastel pink floor length sweetheart neckline dress (which made me feel lowkey so pretty). Dani’s theme colors were pink and mint so I was able to at least wear something I would like. Just as i had slipped on my gown i realized there was no way I could reach the zipper in the back. I huffed and squirmed, trying my damndest until I finally gave up. I opened the bathroom door just a crack and peeked out. My heart basically exploded and I wouldn’t normally say that my basement could flood in two seconds but this was definitely one of those times.
Johnny was checking himself out in the large mirror on the other side of the room. He wore black pinstripe pants that hugged his ass like a dream. The sleeves of his dress shirt were rolled to the elbows and a fitted grey vest covered his torso. He adjusted the black tie around his neck, fussing with it until he seemed comfortable enough. He had an extremely nice watch on one wrist and a silver chain bracelet on the other. A few simple rings decorated his fingers and his black dress shoes seemed to sparkle in the fluorescent lighting. His hair was even freshly faded and his bangs trimmed and slicked back. Lord have mercy I wanted to die. I swallowed hard and took a few deep breaths before I called out to him.
His honey brown eyes shot up to look at me and I gripped the handle of the bathroom door tighter. “What?”
“Could you um…help me zip my dress?”
He sauntered over to me I tried to keep myself within the tiny gap of the open door but he pushed it open leaving me exposed to all of his handsome glory. He found the zipper and slid it up slowly, making sure the fabric didn’t get caught in it. “Do you want me to tie the sash thing too?” I nodded meekly and felt his hands smooth over the fabric under my chest and slide back to gather the ends to tie into a bow. It was such a simple thing to do but it had my body turning warmer by the second. I caught him looking at me in the reflection of the mirror above the sink once he was done. He looked shocked, licking his lips as if he was trying to say something but not being able to get anything out. I turned my head back towards him.
“Do I…do I look okay?”
He shook his head as if to clear his thoughts. “Yeah, you look alright.”
“Oh…” I said softly. Just alright.
“I mean like you look good, you know? Um…yeah, real good.”
I avoided looking at him as I slipped out the bathroom. I didn’t have that much time left before we had to head over and I still had to wiggle my feet into heels that I was sure would break my ankles as soon as I got into them. I struggled to get them strapped around my ankles, huffing when my boobs got in my way as I doubled over to reach my feet. I sat down at the small desk and tried to angle myself another way but it was still just as frustrating. “Need help with that too?” He asked.
I nodded, defeated and he came in front of me, landing on one knee. He slid my dress up to my thigh and took my foot in his hands, delicately securing the straps around my ankle. I couldn’t help but feel like Cinderella in that moment, even if my so called prince charming was a fuck boy. “Thanks.” I said softly as I stood up. He rose to his feet too and it was weird to almost be face to face with him, instead of staring at his chest.
“Oh, i don’t like this.” He joked. “I’d like you to stay mini sized.”
“Yeah well they won’t be on for long. They’re already killing me. I just need to get through the walk and first dance and then i’m tossing them.” I nibbled my lip for a moment before pressing them to his, which seemed to catch him a little off guard. “Hmm, it’s nice to not have to stand on my tiptoes to kiss you.”
“Hm, let’s hope that walk goes fast. I don’t like those heels either.” He smiled at me and offered his arm. “Ready now?”
I grabbed my clutch from atop the desk and nodded. “You have the room key right?”
“Yep.” We headed out of the room and towards the parking lot to my car. “You know, the pastel pink is really nice with your skin tone.”
I straightened up at his compliment. “You really think so?”
He opened the door to my car and lead me to sit down. “I know so.”
I laughed nervously. “A-are you practicing your boyfriend skills?” I tried to make it sound like a joke but he just shrugged and went over to the passenger side to get in. I swallowed hard and clicked my seat belt into place before revving up the engine. “Oh, remember how I said if I told you my government name I’d have to kill you?”
“Yeah?”
“Well you’re going to hear it tonight and if you so much as ever repeat it you won’t have a dick, got it?”
“Why not? It can’t be that bad!”
“Trust me, it definitely is.”
“ERIANNALISSE!”
I cringed. I cringed hard and wanted to shrink away into a minuscule molecule and be non existent. I didn’t even want to look at Johnny to see what he was going to say. I could practically hear him trying to cover up his snickers. I sighed and put on a fake smile as my aunt came to me with arms wide open to capture me in a death grip hug that could snap my spine in half. “Ay, mija! Look at you, you look so pretty!” She paused. “Have you gained weight?”
“Nice to see you too, Titi.” I grit my teeth and tried to ignore her shade. Her eyes went over to Johnny, looking him up and down and squinting her eyes a bit.
“Eriannalisse, quien es este?” She asked who Johnny was.
I grabbed onto his arm, digging my nails into his bicep. “This is my….boyfriend, Johnny.”
He waved and grimaced through my death grip. “Hi. Nice to meet you.”
“Hm…” Was all my aunt said. “Titi Carmen has been wanting to see you. I’m sure she’d want to meet…Johnny.”
“Yeah, i’ll go see her in a bit! I have to find mami and Dani first.”
My aunt kissed both of my cheeks and left to go join the gossiping group of women in my family who all suddenly turned their gazes from their champagne flutes to Johnny and I. I turned my back towards them and looked up at Johnny. “I will literally pay you .25 cents to kill me. Just make it quick.”
“Don’t be so dramatic, Eriannalisse. What’s the worst that could happen?”  He smirked and laughed a bit which made me frown.
“Johnny, I told you don’t call me that. I’m serious. They can call me that because they don’t recognize who I am as a person. You can’t.”
“O-oh…is it a gay thing? Like one of your gay things that you won’t explain to me?”
I sighed and looked down at my feet. “Yeah, sort of. I’ll explain it to you eventually. Just not now ok?”
He took my hand in his and gave it a squeeze. “Ok, i’m sorry. I won’t say it again.” He leaned down just a bit and gave me a soft (rated PG) kiss which made me smile.
“It’s just hard being around them…I wish it would be a fun time but-” I suddenly heard vicious clacking before arms were thrown around my shoulders.
“ERIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!” I recognized the overly excited voice and looked up at my modelesque baby sister. “I missed you so much!”
I kissed her cheek and turned around to properly hug her. “Hey, happy birthday.”
“You’re like almost my height!” She said, looking down at my heels. Dani was so graciously blessed with being 5’8”, skinny, with straighter hair and caramel skin as opposed to my milk chocolate. Her eyes were the perfect shade of hazel with flecks of green that sparkled perfectly. She was only my half sister as our fathers were different but we were raised both the same, save for the fact that she was a model and I was the throw away. “You look so pretty. I’m glad you’re not in black- Yooooooooooo, who is THIS!?” Her attention turned to Johnny, her eyes wide and mouth practically watering.
“Uh…hey.” he said sheepishly.
“This is my boyfriend, Johnny.”
Dani laughed and slapped my shoulder. “No, really!? Who is he?”
I pouted. “I’m serious. He’s my boyfriend.”
Dani looked at me then stepped up to Johnny. “What’s her favorite color?”
“Pastel pink.” He answered.
“Favorite food?”
“Pizza…and pasta.”
“What instruments can she play?”
“Guitar, and she sings.”
“What’s her favorite anime?”
“Sailor Moon.”
Dani squinted her eyes. “When’s her birthday?”
Fuck, he didn’t know that. I grabbed Dani’s arm, trying to get her attention from ruining our facade. “Dani, can you not grill him please? It’s bad enough Titi Lisa and probably Titi Carmen are talking shit about us already. Also, I haven’t told mom yet.”
“You haven’t told mom yet?! How long have you been dating?”
“It’ll be four months in December.” Johnny added. “We started dating right when the semester started. We have a class together and I thought she was cute so,” He shrugged. “Here we are.”
“Yeah but you’re hot. Eri has never dated anyone this hot before.”
“Well gee, thanks Dani! And i’ve dated cute people before!”
“Yeah cute, not hot. He’s hot. If you’re not going to keep him, I’ll take him.”
“You’re fifteen!” Johnny and I said at the same time.
Dani shrugged. “I mean…”
I held my hand up. “Don’t even go there. He’s like-” How old was Johnny anyway? “Way older than you. Stop being an instagram thot for once. Where’s mami? I need to know when she wants us to line up and start this.”
“I think at 8 exactly, but she’s running around like a chicken with her head cut off. I’ve just been chilling with my friends for now. This dress weighs like 50 pounds and I’m sweating like a whore in church.” Dani fanned at herself and hiked up the bodice of her dress. I looked at her poofy dress that was a beautiful array of soft Monet colors but way too 90’s barbie cake topper. It wouldn’t have been my first choice but I was sure mami wanted it to look as traditional as possible. “Oh, by the wayyyy, I know you have a boyfriend now but mami invited Josue.”
I straightened up completely when I heard that name. Josue was my childhood crush. He was older than me and I never stood a chance with him but we always played together. Once we kissed in my backyard and told me that he wanted to play house with me and be the daddy. I had been in love with him up until I was 12 when he moved away to a different state. “Jo-Josue? He’s coming? Here? Tonight?” I squeaked.
“Who’s Josue?” Johnny interjected.
“Josue is Eri’s big ol’ crush from when she was younger. All they did was play house together and be mommy and daddy and make kissy faces at each other. Then they kissed for real and he touched her chichi’s! But they never lived happily ever after because he moved away.”
“Dani, por favor, why do you have to be like this? I’m just happy to know he’s going to be here. I haven’t even seen him in like…almost 7 years. Besides I’m with Johnny now so it doesn’t matter.” I forced his arm around my waist and he clutched onto it tightly.
“Uh-huh whatever. Have you not followed him on Insta? There’s a lot of nice gym pictures. He hit a growth spurt. He’s like 6”3’ now.”
I swallowed hard. “Really? O-oh wow…”
“Sounds like a tool.” Johnny scoffed. “Ya’ll got beer at this place?”
Dani nodded towards the bar at the back of the venue. “Just fight my uncles off before they drink them all.”
“Cool.” He dipped out completely, leaving me and my sister to be swept away by our mother who had just stepped in like she was out of breath. She hustled to get us all lined up and ready like a bridal party ready to walk down the aisle. I sighed as I stayed in place, shuffling a bit as my feet already started to hurt. My mind started wandering to my childhood crush. Memories started bubbling to the surface; he had been my first kiss, the first to get to second base, and the first person I had wanted to be my boyfriend. He was three years older than me and I didn’t stand a chance with him. But his name was written all over my notebooks until I got my first girlfriend.
I couldn’t help but peek around a bit, wondering if he was already in the venue. I didn’t have much time to investigate as our entrance music started playing and pair by pair we walked into the main dance floor. I was walking with one of my younger cousin’s who I rarely spoke with so I barely paid attention. He had to yank me back a bit when I walked too fast and it made me want to punch him. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Johnny leaning against the back wall nursing a beer and watching me intensely. I smiled in his direction, letting him know I was still trying to be civil but he just took another sip and shoved his hand into his pocket. I wondered if he was ignoring me on purpose or if he genuinely didn’t see me. I chewed on my bottom lip almost getting swept up in my thoughts, that was until I saw Dani walking into the room.
Even though I had seen her just minutes ago now that all eyes were on her she looked sparkling and glowing. I’d never seen her look so beautiful before and it brought tears to my eyes that I tried wiping away as soon as they surfaced. I was a proud sibling then. She meant so much to me that I hoped that this day always reminded her of the happiest times she had in her life. We had our ups and downs but for the most part I was always there for her as much as she was there for me. She embarrassed me and I made sure I had to keep her in place before she got too out of hand. Even though I was far away from home now, I knew we would always remain close.
The floor was hers now and we dispersed to let her have the spotlight. I retreated to one of the circular tables while her and our mom shared a dance. It was normally meant for a daughter and her father but since neither of us had them in our lives our mother was the one who deserved to have that dance. I felt a touch on my shoulder and turned to see Johnny sitting behind me at the table. “Want some?” He said, offering the beer which i denied.
“I hate that kind. I’ll leave you too it.”
“She looks nice.”
“She’s a little shit but I love her.”
“I could say the same about you.”
I whipped my head around to stare at him wide eyed. “W-what?”
“I meant like you’re chill! Like i like you. Not like like you but like we’re cool. Uh…you know.” I stammered.
“Right…yeah, um…ok.”
“You wanna dance?!” He said, changing the subject quickly. Dani and my mother had finished their sentimental dance and the dj had switched to some reggaeton/trap mix Dani most likely requested.
“Uh, you mean make a fool out of ourselves?”
He shrugged and chugged down the rest of the beer in a few gulps. I guess it wouldn’t be so bad. My cousins were already grinding with whoever they invited or dancing in groups and laughing. We could probably blend in without being too weird. I kicked off my heels and stood up, extending my hand for him to take. I should’ve had a drink before I even agreed to this. My stomach was already in knots and my anxiety was making me feel like I was going to look stupid but he took my hand and we found a spot in a little corner of the dance floor. I stood in front of him waiting for him to make a move but he just stood there with his hands in his pockets. Why the hell did he keep doing that? Was it a nervous habit?
“So…” he said.
“Are you gonna like…move?”
“I’ve never danced to this sort of music. What do I do?”
“Literally it’s the same as rap music in english. You just sorta…” I gestured towards my family. “Grind on each other and act a fool.”
“So you turn around and just like put your ass against me?”
“Oh my God, have you never done that before?”
“Listen I was a dork and went to high school with a bunch of white kids and we like listened to Ke$ha and Britney Spears. What do you want from me?” He laughed.
“That’s unfortunate.” I joked. I turned around so my back was against his chest and I set his hands on my hips. “I’m not the best but I figure I can put my ass to use.” I worked myself back against him, swaying to the music a bit in hopes of getting him to respond.
Instead he laughed nervously and held my waist tighter. “How do people not get boners doing this?”
“I mean that’s what the song 'Too Close’ is about. Don’t tell me this is turning you on already.” I teased.
He lowered himself to face level and turned my head towards his to kiss me. I held it for a bit, enjoying the way the warmth of his tongue flowed over mine until I realized if my mom caught me doing this my ass would be grass. I pushed him back gently. “Johnny! I can’t do that. Behave!”
“C'mon, I at least need to have a little bit of fun while I’m here. And then when we get back to the motel we can-”
I felt a tap on my shoulder then. Johnny and I both looked up to see a tall, absolutely golden, green eyed adonis that looked like he could pick me up and toss me around in an instant. If I could have heart eyes I definitely would. I let go of Johnny instantly, almost pushing him away as my heart started to skip beats.
“Eri!” I knew it was him instantly even if puberty hit him like a freight train and gave him a deep bass-y voice that made my hair stand on end. He opened his arms to scoop me up and crush me to his barrel chest which smelled of high priced cologne. My feet dangled just a bit when he lifted me. “I can’t believe it. I haven’t seen you in ages!”
“Oh my god, Josue…Jesus, you’re huge.” God I hoped he was huge everywhere.
He laughed and I tried not to show how much it affected me. “Oh yeah, I’m really into that health and fitness thing. You really uh…wow. Definitely not a teeny bopper anymore.” He set me back down and adjusted the sleeves of his suit jacket.
“Yep! Got bigger boobs now, haha!” Why did I say that? WHY???
He licked his lips a smiled a bit. “I can definitely see that.”
Johnny cleared his throat deeply. Josue turned his attention to the man behind me. “Oh hey, I’m Josue. Who are you?”
“I’m her boy-”
“This is just Johnny!” I interjected with a nervous laugh. “Just Johnny! Want to go get something to drink? We can catch up!”
Josue flashed his incredibly perfect teeth. “Yeah I’d love that.” He set his giant hand against the small of my back ushering me away from Johnny.
“Eri!” Johnny said sternly.
“I’ll just be quick!” I mouthed to him, letting myself get whisked away. He didn’t seem too happy about that but I could let him sulk for a bit. I was too preoccupied at the moment anyway.
Johnny’s POV
That was fucked up. Way more than fucked up and I was pissed off beyond belief. She was the one who begged me to come with her so she would survive her family. Now she was head over heels for some dude she had a crush on years ago who looked like the biggest douchebag to ever exist. He was taller than me and more built, had perfect teeth and no lisp. I wanted to punch him dead in the jaw.
I didn’t know what to do now. If I went after her it might cause a scene which I didn’t completely want. I still knew that this party was important to her sister and unlike her I wasn’t being an asshole for once. I could get another drink and maybe get away with being a little tipsy but her loud uncles were hogging up the space and the bartender’s attention. I grumbled as I sat back down at the table. my arms crossed as I contemplated leaving her and going back to the motel by myself.
"What are you pouting for?!” Dani said as she plopped down next to me, her poofy dress seeming to expand.
“Nothing.”
“Where’s Eri?”
“With precious Josue.” I said bitterly.
“Ah, so he finally found her. I knew he would.” She drummed her nails on the table thinking over her next statement. “You’re not dating my sister are you?”
“It’s complicated…”
“You’re fuck buddies?”
“Yes.”
“I figured as much. She can’t never lie right when it comes to me. So, you’re in love with her then?”
I snapped my head towards her. “Excuse me?”
“You’re in love with her right? I mean that’s the only reason you would be sulking over her because Eri went off with her new papi.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m not sulking.” She was definitely Eri’s sister with how she blurted out things without consequence.
“Look, if you want to win her over you need to definitely do something that will make her remember you. Not that I want to hear about my sister’s sex life or even think about her getting p or v action, but if you got something she might like, go for it. And do it before she ends up going to Josue’s hotel.” She craned her neck to see where Eri and that asshole had gone off too. “Looks like he may have already given her his number.”
I looked in the same direction, my anger only getting stronger. They were huddled over their phones, laughing, with Eri casually (but noticeably) keeping her hands on him. I didn’t want to “win her over”. I wanted to stake my claim and tell him to fuck right off. The grip on my biceps got tighter the more I stared at them. “Ay, you got a younger brother?”
I turned my attention back to Dani, a bit grateful that she was distracting me enough to not go apeshit. “What? No? I’m an only child.”
“Wack. But like if you’re not gonna date Eri then likeeee…”
“You’re fifteen! I’m not going to jail nor am I interested.”
“Ok, ok…but like do you have any younger friends? What flavor Asian are you? Chinese? Or like them ones that dance on tv? The um…the Korean ones!”
“Oh my God.” I ran a hand over my face. “Yes I’m Korean. And no I don’t have any friends your age. My only young friend in Toronto is 18, which is still illegal.”
“Dammit. You know Eri be listening to that stuff right?”
I pulled out my phone, wanting her to take a hint that she was now annoying me without being too rude. “Doesn’t surprise me when she fucks half of Asia.”
“All her hookups are with Asian guys?”
“As far as I’m aware. But who fuckin’ knows.”
“Oooohhh I gotta mess with her about that. Guess she trying to get that carribean dick now.” She cackled and slapped my back hard as she got up. “Call me, ok?!” She said as she finally left me to join the gaggle of teenage girls that were her friends.
I rubbed my temples and took a few deeps breaths. I needed a smoke, badly. I looked to see if Eri was still stuck to Josue’s side but they were nowhere to be found. I looked around the dance floor trying to see if they might have gone there. Sure enough she was grinding on him now, definitely not as awkward as she had been with me. She was practically bent over and ready to get fucked by him. Fuck it. I stood up and weaved through everyone dancing to make my way over to her. I stood in front of her, watching as she came up from shaking her ass.
“Can we help you?” Josue yelled over the music to me. I rolled my eyes at him and took Eri’s chin in my hand giving her a deep kiss. She stumbled back a bit and gripped onto my vest. When i pulled away i licked my lips, tasting the slight flavor of her lipstick.
“Johnny!” She exclaimed.
“What the hell are you doing?” He asked, in his macho voice, trying to one up me.
“Oh, you didn’t know?” I grabbed onto Eri’s waist and kept her close to me. “She’s MY girlfriend. You had your fun catching up right?”
“Eri, you didn’t tell me-”
She looked panicked as she glanced between us. “No, wait- It’s just-”
“Come with me.” I growled in her ear. “Now.”
“Johnny , I swear to g-” I kept my arm around her waist and lead her towards the front door of the venue. When we were in the clear she whipped around to face me. “What the actual fuck?!”
“I should be asking you the same thing! You’re really gonna ditch me to throw yourself on him? After you begged me to come here?!”
“I wasn’t throwing myself on him! We haven’t seen each other in 7 years! So excuse me if I wanted to talk with him.”
“Hard to talk to him with his dick practically in your mouth! What is wrong with you?!”
“Why are you being such a jerk again! You always do this!” She yelled.
“You’re the one being the jerk this time! I’m fuckin’ pissed. When are we leaving?”
“Leaving?! I have to stay here for at least a few hours! Clearly you don’t know how these go.”
“No, Eri, i fuckin’ don’t. But I do know that you going off with someone else while I’m supposed to be your boyfriend blows our entire cover. So either you fucking act right or I can leave right now. You sister already knows were lying.”
“Fuck!” She stomped her foot and sighed. “I knew she would figure it out. She better not tell anyone.”
“I’m pretty sure she won’t have to with you being stupid. Get me my cigs from your purse wallet thingy.”
“Get you-? Get it yourself! I’m freezing and I’m going back inside. And maybe i’ll still be talking with Josue!”
I grabbed her arm and held onto it. “Eri, do you want to go there? Really want to go there?” My eyes caught hers and i could see how hard she swallowed. Her chest was heaving chest a bit and trembling with the cold.
“What are you going to do?” She sniffled.
“Do you want to find out?”
“M-maybe.”
I let her go then opened the door, guiding her back inside. “Then keep it up. I dare you.”
She stayed quiet then but shuffled ahead of me quickly. I realized I had made her walk outside without her shoes on or our coats but it was whatever at this point. I needed her to know that I wasn’t playing games any more. She was mine.
–*
Eri’s POV
I could barely keep up with Johnny’s long strides from the parking lot to the door of our motel room. He continued his little tyrade of sticking by me and keeping me from Josue, never letting go of my hand, or my waist, even when he went through the ringer of meeting more members of my family. Him being pissed off had me pissed off and it didn’t help when my family told me how fat I looked, or asked when Johnny and I were getting married, or why I had spent so much time in college, or even that what I was studying wasn’t going to get me a real job. It made the entire rest of the night absolutely fucking miserable. Not to mention when I told my mother I was going to spend the night in the motel with Johnny instead of driving home at midnight she blew up on me, saying that it wasn’t right and insisting that I stay at the house. I refused to and I had no idea why she still thought I was some sort of Virgin de Guadalupe or some shit. It was another fight to end this magical night. I gave up and just wanted to take a hot shower, put on my fuzzy pajamas on and possibly smoother Johnny with a pillow as he slept.
Johnny barged into our room, not even bothering to hold the door open for me. I didn’t even want to deal with him since I was still mad at my mother for treating me like a child. I went straight to prepping for my shower, tossing my clutch and fake eyelashes on the desk and my phone on the bed so i could plug it in to charge. I unzipped the dress as best as I could without his assistance and shimmied out of it, leaving it a puddle in front of the bed. I didn’t care anymore. Not one bit. After I showered I pulled the too short towel around me and went back into the shared space. Johnny was sitting in the chair, feet propped up on the desk and tie loosened. He was glaring at me and I swallowed hard at the intensity. He dropped his legs and leaned forward in the seat, undoing the first few buttons on his dress shirt.
I tried to ignore the effect he had on me and instead went to my duffel bag to try and find my pajamas. He stopped me as I passed by him, grabbing my wrist and pulling me in front of him. “Ow! What’s your problem now?!” I asked, still trying to clutch onto my towel so it wouldn’t fall.
“This night was complete bullshit. I’m your boyfriend and all you could do was throw yourself onto that guy and embarrass me in front of everyone.”
“I wasn’t throwing myself on him!” I argued again. I hated that he was saying that. So what if I found Josue incredibly attractive and felt like a preteen again as soon as I saw him? That was my business and not Johnny’s.
“You grinded on him, got his number, and had your arms around him for minutes on end. You made me look stupid. I’m your boyfriend, Eri.”
“Fake boyfriend.” I corrected.
“That’s what I meant.”
“Why should you be embarrassed then?!”
“Because your uncles didn’t think that I was man enough to keep you with me. And your aunts talked shit about me all night.” He pressed himself up against me making the edge of the desk dig into my lower back. “You said you were going to be civil and you were far from civil.” He set his hands on either side of my hips, keeping me in place.
“A-ah, Johnny…back u-up.” I whimpered and avoided looking at him but he grabbed my face roughly.
“You wanna try that shit again, Eri? Hmm?”
I could feel his fingers digging harshly into my jaw. “I didn’t do anything wrong! You’re just a jealous prick that-”
He pulled away from me and shoved me back onto the bed, instantly hovering over me. My towel fell open just like my legs and he pinned both my wrists above my head in one of his large hands. I swallowed hard and felt my heartbeat increase. I had no idea what had gotten into him and i was partially thinking about what Doyoung had said about Johnny. Was he actually trying to manipulate me and make me feel bad for being with Josue? I bit my lip as I thought, wondering what his next move would be. “Get off me.” I tried to sound strong but it was a pathetic attempt.
“Open.” He demanded.
“W-what?” What the hell did he want? I figured it out quickly as three of his fingers dove down my throat almost making me gag. I squirmed against him, trying to edge my head away but he was adding more of his weight onto me as his fingers plowed into my mouth. His knee was pressed right into my center, the residual wetness from the shower dampening the fabric. I tried swallowing around the invasion when his knee started to rock into me.
“Suck harder, Eri.”
I didn’t dare look at him. His voice was doing something to me as always. Stirring the pot of emotions and hormones that made me fall into a space of complete submission. This wasn’t like his usual ways though throughout or hookups I could see the dominance poking through. Now he was another person that I was desperate to get to know. I tried my best to suck deeper at his fingers, sliding my tongue around them and providing them all the wetness they hopefully needed. I knew exactly where they were going and i was going to be stretched far beyond my imagination. With his thrust his rings kissed my lips, shocking me with a bit of cold and excitement. I edged my tongue around the silver as best I could given the invasion that took up most of my mouth. Slowly the metal warmed up and I pressed my thighs against his, feeling a tingling throughout my center.
He pulled his hand away sharply, making me cough as his glistening fingers dove lower. Two were rushed inside me making my knees jerk up towards my chest and toes curl. I was already crying out his name, wanting him to slow down just enough for me to catch my breath and adjust but he ignored me. Instead he was working in the third finger, forcing my walls to flex and waver around him. He was already digging my arousal out of me. I could hear it so blatantly echoing in our room. I buried my face in my arm beside my head, still being unable to free my hands though I struggled as much as I could. He seemed to like that struggle as his fingers curled deep inside me, knuckles pressing against my entrance, the rings threatening to push past and fill me up too.
“Fuck, Johnny!!!” I cried out as my thighs almost snapped shut. It was starting to be too much and I could feel myself already crawling towards an orgasm.
“Quiet.” Was all he said as he pulled his fingers out to give me some relief from the pressure. I was throbbing and gaping around the stretch he left behind, my whole lower half practically trembling. He finally let me go and sat down on the bed. He splayed his legs open, unzipping his dress pants and beckoning me over to him. “Get over here.”
I shook my head, raising myself to my knees and shrinking myself away. I wasn’t scared of him, far from it. I was definitely turned on more than anything but I wanted to push him further than he had ever been capable of. He wanted to be a jealous boyfriend that pushed my buttons well I was going to push right back. “You’re being a jerk. I’m not giving you the satisfaction, especially after you decided to barge in there with your giant ass fingers!”
He lurched forward and grabbed onto my arm before I could wiggle away. He yanked me to his chest then gripped the back of my neck hard. Our eyes met before he pulled me close to his lips. “I like it better when you don’t talk.”
I squinted at him, almost in shock that he used my own line against me. “You fucker.”
He pressed me down towards his lap though I tried to resist as much as I could. It was no use as he was stronger than me and I was face to face with his growing length trapped within his briefs. His hand was now digging into my hair keeping me firmly in place. I landed a bite to his hipbone making sure he knew I wasn’t too pleased in the way he was handling me. He hissed out my name and arched his hips, his nails digging into my scalp. I wrapped my hand around his, trying to pry his iron grip away while adding kitten licks to the outline of his cock. That seemed to soothe him a little as I heard him exhale through his nose as he relaxed back against the wall. His nails quit marking my skin and he opted to push my hair away from my face gently instead of trying to rip it out.
I slid his briefs back and guided him towards my mouth pressing kisses down the shaft before licking back up to the tip. Once I got to the tip, I took him in, swallowing his head completely. I shifted my hips to raise my ass higher for him to look at knowing it would tease him. I looked up at him and saw the full pleasure that was written across his face. His eyes had closed, his lips pressed together, and his fingers trailing down to open more buttons on his dress shirt. I popped off him and placed kisses up his stomach with each new area that became exposed. “I can tease that little spot that you like.” I smirked and added a slow stroke to his cock.
“Actually, I have a better idea.” He shoved me down onto my back and straddled my shoulders, his cock now hovering above my face. I couldn’t move with his weight on me and I was trapped between his thick thighs. He tapped my lips with his cock which I absolutely hated. I slapped at his stomach but he remained stoic. He only moved to shove himself down my throat, propping one hand against the wall while the other kept my head in place. He worked quickly to rock his hips against my face making me claw at him. I wasn’t used to this sort of thing, even with all of my experience, and it hurt like all hell. I was trying my damnedest not to gag around him but it was impossible given the fact that he was ramming into my throat. My eyes watered and tears fell against my will. My nails dug into his hips as I silently begged for him to slow down.
He was moaning my name, more than he ever had before, completely lost in the pleasure of torturing my throat. He looked fucking amazing, I had to give him that much, even if I hated what he was doing to me. I loved the way his hair was coming undone from the gel he used, the way his dress shirt lay open and his tie dangled above me like an invitation. The way his thighs stretched out his dress pants was a dream and I wanted to touch every part of him. I reached for the thinner end of his tie, pulling roughly so it zipped up to his throat. He lurched back at the sudden pressure and looked down at me. He must have seen my fucked up state because he pulled out, leaving me grossed out by the messy spit that connected us still.
"Fu-fucker. That hurt” I croaked.
He pulled off me completely before lifting me up to sit in his lap. He wiped away my tears and I buried my face in his neck, clutching onto his vest. He kissed at my cheek, pulling me away from hiding. “You ok?”
I sniffled and nodded. He worked his hands over my sides and hips trying to soothe me more. Of course he couldn’t help himself and gripped my ass tight which made me laugh just a bit. “I’ve never done that before…”
“Really?” He asked, surprised.
“Ok, I’m a hoe but like there are some things I haven’t done before. You have to remember you dick is huge, dude. I’m small.”
He gave me soft tender kisses and tucked my hair behind my ear. “I know, princess. I’m sorry. But don’t think you’re getting away with this shit either.”
I pouted and crossed my arms over my chest. “I stand by the fact that I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Hmm.” Was all he said before he tossed me face down onto the bed. I looked back at him as he discarded the rest of his clothes, dangerously holding his tie in his hand. He mounted me, as I was completely his to take and wrapped the loop of the tie around my wrists, pulling tight. “You like this don’t you?” It was supposed to be a command but I could tell it was mostly an uneasy question and he needed permission to continue.
I nodded and smiled at him. “I like it a lot, daddy.” I gave him a quick kiss sealing my consent. I threw out my rule of not using our titles with one another since he couldn’t actually communicate but in this moment I need him to know that I was his to command and I was giving him as much power as I would allow.
He wrapped the length tie around his fist, keeping a firm hold on it. His other hand jerked my hips up while his knee nudged my legs apart as far as they could go. My ass was raised, arms outstretched, and my body was trembling with excitement. His first thrust was swift and hard. I could hear his hips snap against me and I was barely able to hold myself up in that moment. My arms shook weakly and I dug my fingers into the sheets as my mouth curved into a silent moan. He was almost too deep for me to handle and every slam into me seemed harsher than the last. I couldn’t really keep up. It was overpowering and I wanted to scream my pleasure into the tiny room though I could barely even mumble a word.
My fingers curled as I tried to send tension to my arms instead of my weakening legs. It was useless though and I could feel my stomach tightening. He landed a slap to my ass just as I tried to pull away from him and regroup. I hissed and bowed my head, breathing out his title again. Suddenly, my phone buzzed by my head, the screen lighting up and distracting me. I turned to see who it was and winced. This was the worst time for him to call.
Johnny pressed my head into the mattress and sped up his brutal thrusts. “Why don’t you answer it, Eri? Let him hear how good you’re getting fucked. Tell him who’s really your boyfriend.”
I opened my mouth to say anything but all that came out we’re soft croaks. I panicked when I saw him reach for my phone and I struggled to move to try and block him. “D-dont, please don’t.” I was finally able to say. He let go of his grip on the tie wrapped around my wrists and instead set it around my neck. The call disappeared much to my relief.
“What a shame Eri. Let’s see if he calls back or if he took the fucking hint.” I swallowed hard and nodded, biting into my lip to try and still my moans. He quickly latched his teeth into my neck, sucking deeply like he always did when he wanted to mark me. “Stay on all fours, got it?”
I propped myself back to my elbows as he forced my thighs to rest on the outside of his. I could hear his moan of satisfaction at the sight of me splayed open with his cock stuffed inside me. I wanted to shy away and hide but he wouldn’t let me of course. He resumed his grip on the tie, pulling it taught around my neck and constricting my air flow. My eyelids fluttered and i wondered if this was heaven. Jesus, it felt so amazing even if every muscle in my body felt like it was burning and my insides were a scrambled mess. While he made my back dip by pulling my neck by the tie I felt his other hand slid down from my hips to my wetness, flowing over my clit. I was grateful for the extra attention and wiggled my hips to rock back against him and dive further into his fingers.
His finger started to trail from my clit to dance around my gaping entrance and just like before he pressed the long digit in little by little until it was almost as deep as his cock. I pleaded for him to stop, it was too much, too overwhelming for my overly sensitive walls but he kept working away at my torturous pleasure. That, coupled with his thickness, made the tendons in my legs strain as bliss shot through me. My moans mixed in with my strangled pants as he dared to press a second finger into me.“J-johnny!!” I rasped. “It’s too much!!”
He pressed his body weight harder against me, keeping me pinned so I would have no way from escaping the overstretching. “You’re not going anywhere.” He whispered harshly in my ear, making me shudder. He curled his finger then, the pressure of his knuckles against his cock, and the sliding of his rings against my heated walls made me clench meekly around him. Johnny enjoyed seeing me writhe beneath him, seeing me try and focus on being a good brat when in reality I was starting to unravel into a brainless mess. Nothing had a hold on my attention like the buildup he was creating inside me. I could barely process the words he was saying to me with how fuzzy my senses were. He curled his fingers deeper getting right to the root of my pleasure. The head of his cock was edging as far as it could go within me, his fingers pressed into the perfect spot, and his thumb brought back smalls swipes and circles against my clit. It was a haphazard clusterfuck of intense sensations that all culminated into a harsh orgasm that sent my mind reeling. It felt like my cum rushed out of me, painting my thighs with a deep warmth that was astounding.
I squeezed my eyes shut as my entire frame trembled. My muscles seized, tensed, and finally gave out. I fell forwards, collapsing onto the bed in a breathless heap. My lower half practically felt numb and I tried to concentrate on not passing out. It wasn’t just the physical fatigue, the mental and emotional fatigue of the entire day weighed on me in that moment. My few seconds of recuperation was cut short when Johnny pulled his fingers out of me. I felt another gush then, making me a bit confused as to how wet I really was. It definitely felt different and I could hear Johnny make some remark though his words weren’t registering. He said something else and I nodded weakly, agreeing to whatever he had posed just for me to have the ability to relax soon.
But that was definitely wishful thinking. He yanked me almost to the edge of the bed and continued his brutal fucking. I let him grip onto the back of my thighs as he huffed out growls and moans. He was swelling inside me, making me wince yet encourage him with mumbles that I thought were words. His fingertips dug into me harder and that sweet heat spread throughout my body again. I smiled and relished in the feeling of him pumping into me, slower and slower, until he milked himself completely. I laid there, unmoving and enjoying the way he felt inside me like I always did until I i lost myself in sleep.
–*
Johnny’s POV
I felt her move beneath me and there was a stickiness and sweatiness between us. I groaned as I didn’t really want to move but I needed to break away and get some air. My hand was over hers, my body curled around her, and my cock of course still inside her. It was almost perfect save for the giant wet spot we were forced to lay in because she squirted everywhere. We had both fallen asleep almost immediately after and i just adjusted her in the bed for me to have enough room to spoon her. Now everything made me feel like I needed an hour long shower. I rolled away, letting go of her hand and putting my forearm over my eyes to block out the bright light of the room. How long were we even asleep for?
She mumbled something and groaned, blinking a few times before fully looking at me. “Hey.” She sounded like she had smoked 2 packs of cigarettes a day for the past 40 years and I cringed at my handiwork. She tried clearing her throat but opted that it was too sore and winced in pain.
“Hey…maybe you shouldn’t talk…” She glared at me and I shuffled a bit away so she wouldn’t attack me.
“I feel gross. Why is everything wet? What happened?”
“What do you mean what happened? We fucked?”
“No, no, I know that. But I was so tired at the end-” She paused to rub at her throat. “I felt like half asleep. It was good though but I was worn out.” She laughed softly.
“Well, you’re welcome for that but like…do you even remember your orgasm?”
She nodded quickly, her smile beaming. “Oh yeah.”
“You squirted everywhere and basically we’ve been laying in the soaked sheets because we’re dumb as fuck.”
“Wait…squirted? No, i can’t do that. I’ve never done that.”
“What do you mean you cant do that? You literally did. Twice. The first time when you had your big one and then when i pulled my fingers out. It was like…not how they make it out to be in porn. Like not some weird super soaker spray but like-”
She held her hand up to stop me. “Please don’t describe it any further. I just…holy shit.”
I pulled out of her slowly, never getting used to that amazing feeling. It got me every time. It also sent my cum dripping out of her which was almost as good of a sight as her squirting. “Fuck…”
She wiggled a bit, a look of discomfort on her face. “What the hell?”
“We’ll now we got my cum on the sheets…” I said, partially annoyed. We really had to get them off this bed.
“DID YOU CUM IN ME AGAIN?!”
Her yelling caught me off guard. “Yes? I asked you this time and you agreed!”
“When?!”
“What do you mean when!?”
“I’m sorry if I was too fucked out and tired to freakin’ listen to you blab during sex! But you can’t be doing that! It freaks me out!!!”
“Hey, i asked to cash in my favor and you definitely said yes so I did it. It is not my fault.” I sat up slowly and inched my way to roll off the bed. “Come on. We need to get these off and I think I’m gonna take a shower.”
“Aren’t you worried at all?” She said softly.
“Me? Not really. I told you it’ll be alright. We’ve got everything covered.” It was a lie but I was blinded by how good it felt sexually and I also didn’t want to make her panic more than she already was. I told myself I’d stop after this one last time and not risk it anymore. She didn’t move and I could tell she was overthinking again. I went over to her and scooped her into my arms, holding her bridal style. “I’ll have you get the shower started while I take care of the bed. She held onto my neck and buried her face in my chest as I walked her into the bathroom, gently setting her down in the tub. “You ok?”
“Y-yeah…” She reached up and pulled me in for a kiss that I held for a long time. It wasn’t deep or passionate but more so intimate and warm. I sighed and cupped her face.
“Go, ok? I’ll be right back.”
I pulled away from her which seemed to be getting harder and harder each time. Even if it was just back into the room it felt like a million miles away. I tore off the soaked sheets, glad that the comforter was still mostly dry, and tossed them in the corner of the room. I said a silent apology to housekeeping and hoped to all hell they wouldn’t look at it directly when they put it in the wash. I padded back to the bathroom and slipped in behind her.
“Turn around.” She said and I gave her a questioning look. She sucked her teeth. “I was just about to get the…stuff out.”
“Eri, i’ve literally seen you every which way. Do you really think I care how you look getting my cum out of you?”
“JUST DO IT.”
I sighed and turned around, picking up the little motel bar of soap and ripping off the plastic. I waited for her to finish, getting impatient about being in the cold spot. “Dude, hurry up.”
“THERE IS A LOT OK? You don’t cum like a normal human being!”
“Apparently neither do you, Splash Mountain.”
‘OH MY GOD. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP.”
I snorted and looked back at her. “Can I please get under the water now? I’m freezing.”
She switched spots with me and I finally got under the hot stream, thankful to wash away a whole nights worth of sex. My time under the stream by myself didn’t last long as Eri snuggled up next to me, her hair a soaking mess of waves that framed her face and made her look like a painting of a goddess. “Too cold. I want to be next to you.”
“You big baby.” I joked and ruffled her hair. She pouted and poked at my stomach making me squirm away. Our antics made our shower way more fun than it should’ve been, mimicking the perfect time we had in the tub before I freaked out on her. It was almost like a do over and I was appreciative of that fact. Once we were done and dried we curled up, facing one another, under the comforter. And although we were both fatigued, we stood up for hours talking about shit I never even dreamed about knowing about her. By the time the sun rose I was able to realize that one thing was for sure. I was in love with her.
We thought everything would be fine after that, and it was between us, but on Eri’s side things seemed to hit the fan one after the other. Their grandpa, who was back on the island they were from, fell ill. Their mother didn’t let them have a say in anything and whisked them away, making them leave school and work behind. There was a looming threat that they could be fired or even lose their financial aid which worried them just as much as their grandpa’s health. Each night they were gone we would facetime just so I could see them. I missed having them beside me whenever I wanted and it wasn’t even about the sex anymore. I genuinely found that I liked talking to them. There was never any judgement and I started to understand why certain things were important to them. Now I had to be there for them and help them stay strong even though I knew they were crumbling.
I was laying on my side, my phone propped against the wall, as I watched them cry. There wasn’t much I could do, or even say, at this point but i remained on the video. They apologized over and over for crying so much but i reassured them that I didn’t care. They let me know that it was okay when I cried and I wanted them to know the same. “I miss you..” They hiccuped.
I sniffed and cleared my throat, swallowing my own emotions. “I miss you too…you know you have to be there. It’s going to be okay.”
“He’s gonna die Johnny. I know it. I visited him today at the hospital and my mom and my aunts just keep putting this weird bandaid on it. They keep thinking he’s going to bounce back and be able to take care of the house and my grandma and he wont. He literally wont. I don’t know why they won’t just fuckin’ say it.”
“They’re scared, Eri. They’re losing one of their parents. It’s always going to be scary.”
“I know that but I hate being the only fucking rational one here. It’s driving me insane. Just look at him and say he’s going to die! He’s just going to die, Johnny. He’s going to…” They burst into another round of tears and buried their face into a pillow, muffling the heart wrenching sobs. I wish I could be there. I wish I could hold them so fucking tight and never let them go. It hurt me to see them like this.
“Baby, look at me, ok?” They moved their head up and wiped at their eyes. “When you come back here, i’ll be here for you ok? It’s going to be hard but I’ll help you get through this. And so will Quinn and stupid ass Lucas and all your other friends.”
I finally saw them crack a small smile which made me feel a little better. “I know…I-” Suddenly, someone burst into their room. I couldn’t make out who it was exactly as the video started to pixelate. They had a conversation that I couldn’t understand but seemed stressed. They grabbed their phone and finally the video came back into view. “I have to go. I-I’ll talk to you later, ok?!” Before I could even respond the video was cut off and I had my own disturbance burst into my room. I shot up in bed, looking at Jae who seemed to be distressed. Great, was everyone around me having issues at once?
“Dude, what the-” He held his cell phone out in his shaking hand and I could see a call from an unknown number going on. “What?” I asked, still confused.
“Talk. Talk now.”  was all he said.
I took the phone tentatively and held it to my ear. My body went into shock as soon as I heard the voice that had haunted me for weeks on end. The voice that made my skin crawl and make me want to vomit. What she said next drenched my blood run cold.
“Johnny, I’m pregnant.”
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the-fiction-witch · 5 years
Text
Dirty Boy! P3
TV SHOW: GODLESS COUPLE: WHITEY WINN X READER RATING: SMUT
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Saturday:
I sighed trying to get my fire to lite the rain had been falling hard since yesterday and my house was becoming an ice box because of it I heard a little knock on my door
"who is it?" I ask
"the sexiest boy in la belle" I heard whitey laugh
"come in whitey" I sigh and he happily came in shutting the door behind him
"I missed you when you ran out on me yesterday" he smiles
"you were supposed to" I laugh
"here let me help," he says sitting beside me and helping me with the fire "that was very mean what you did to me yesterday" he complains
"I know" I giggle as we got my little fire going
"you know... If I wanted to I could lock you up in the office or handcuff you so you can't do somethin so mean to me" he smirks "if you where in the cell you couldn't run away from me baby" he smirked kissing my shoulder
"yes but then I wouldn't do all the little things you love" I smirk
"true, y/n... Can we fool around today?" He asks "please" he begs pulling a pouty puppy face at me
"no" I laugh sitting on my sofa and he sat beside me "if your so desperate whitey why don't you just touch... yourself?" I ask
"i do, just though my pocket when I'm watching you, I can't make myself cum baby, you have been too good to me. You've spoilt me because of your touching and grinding my hands are worthless now my cock feels how good it is to have a sexy lady around" he explained
"awww poor whitey, why not just make your hands go numb and imagine it's me" I smirk snuggling into his neck
"i do baby" he groans "but it's still me and I know that it's me, I need you baby" he begs
"why should I?" I ask
"y/n it's been almost a week I haven't waited this long for an orgasm since I discovered jerking off, I can't take your torcher anymore" he groans kissing any part of my skin exposed to him "just somethin anythin I don't care what ya do to me, just make me cum y/n" he begs
"anything?" I ask and he nods so I giggled slipping my hand up his leg he hitched he breath excited for me to touch him I slipped my hand in his pocket and he seemed a bit confused before I found the little hole in his pocket I could feel his half hard cock on the other side of this little hole his head a little wet from pre-cum and the shaft a little tender humm he must have been playing with it before me came to see me he lightly grunts as he felt me so close to him "hummm, somebody has been touching him today" I smirk
"I had too, he was begging for you this mornin" he groans "he was so hard for ya baby, after you being so mean to me this week my dreams are so dirty, dreamin of you not running off or people not barging in on us dreamin we got.to finish what we have been doing" he smirks as I slowly ran my finger around his head "huu...y/n" he moans "touch me.. more please" he begs so I slipped my hand in further taking a grip of his cock "uhhh! Yes, touch me please" he begs so I ran my hand all over him and slowly began pumping "uhh uhh ummmmm! Yes ohh my god! Im already close baby" he moans
"does it feel as good as you imagined? Having me to touch your cock?" I ask
"a billion times better then I could have ever dreamed y/n" he groans
"Good, sit still, stay quiet" I tell him "undo your pants whitey" I smirk getting up to lock my door and shut my blinds he was just finishing undoing them as I sat down and I nuzzled into his neck
"there ya go, he's out and waiting baby" he smirks and I giggled giving his neck more kisses "don't you wanna see him? See how big he is for ya? See how.much he needs ya" he smirks
"no" I answer
"why not?" He asks
"I like the secrecy" I smirk "we have to keep something a secret don't we whitey?" I smirk
"but how are you goin to do anythin to me without looking?" He asks
"easy" I smirk running my hand up his leg and grabbing his base he almost screamed his head back on my sofa his eyes half closed like he wanted to shut them in pleasure but he didn't want to miss the sight of my hand on his cock I began slow little tiny movements up and down but even they got
"Uhhhhh uhhhhh uhhhhh ummmm baby! More more! Please I'm beggin ya y/n! More...." He moans
"hummm dirty boys should keep quiet and enjoy what they are given else they get nothing" I warn
"I'm sorry y/n your hands just feel so good" he groans "could I ask... A favour?" He asks
"depends on what it is whitey?" I answer slowly getting faster
"ummmm... Can I .. can I kiss ya?" He asks
"alright" I smile
"not just that...but uhh... Could you use your other hand to uhh... Touch somewhere else?" He suggests
"where?" I ask curiously and he smirks doing his jumper and shirt slipping them off leaving him sat in just his pants but even they where open exposing his long seven inch cock he took my other hand giving it a soft light kiss before he rested my hand on his bare chest "well alright whitey, so long as you keep quiet" I tell him
"I will, I promise" he groans so I kissed his soft lips melting into the heavenly kisses as I sped up my hand he groaned and moaned into my mouth a lot but I kept going trying to make sure his pleasure wouldn't stop for a moment, "y/n...can i-" he began
"what now whitey?" I laugh
"can I uh... Please" he begs his hand hovering above my arse and I nod so he grabbed me hard almost throwing me forward back to his lips his gropes where hard and sexy like he had no.choice in groping me he had to to let his pleasure escape him in some way but he moved his hand it slipping up my waist to grab my breasts and he moaned into our kiss so I sped up my hand "UHHHHHH AH UHH UHH PLEASE Y/N IM CLOSE IM BEGGIN YA LET ME.CUM" He begs
"why should I?" I ask
"because ya love me?" He asks
"not a good enough reason" I laugh
"because I need it" he begs
"knowone needs an orgasm" I giggle
"please... please, I'm beggin ya baby" he groans
"nope" I giggle
"I'll fuck ya later if ya make me cum?" He suggests
"no thank you whitey" I giggled slowing my hand
"uhhh noo! No no! Please I'll give you three orgasums if you let me have this one please" he begs
"humm no" I smirk almost stopping
"uhhhhh y/n please I'm in agony please I'll do anythin just let me cum please" he screams
"magic words?" I giggled
"please!" He screams
"noo that's not the sexy magic words" I giggled he sat lookin'at me a bit confused before he smirked
"please touch me baby" he growls
"why should I? Why should I let you cum?" I ask
"because... I want you" he smirks "I want to fuck that pussy raw, but my baby is being difficult so she will touch until I'm done with her else I'll force her down and fuck her pretty tittes all night" he smirks
"humm dirty boy" I smirk kissing him
"it's how you like me?" He smirks groping my breasts hard "soo.. baby girl, make me cum" he begs
"alright" I smirk kissing him hard running my hand around his bare skin and jerking him as hard and fast as I could he moans loudly into my mouth I can tell by the moans and tightness of his cock he was close and the lustful kisses and groping was a good indication too I heard a knock at my door and pulled away he looked upset mad at me even but I kept moving my hand I winked at him sitting normally and still jerking his cock "who is it?" I ask
"it's bill y/n can I come in?" He asks whitey quietly losing his mind unbelievably close to his orgasm
"sorry bill I'm changing what do you want?" I ask
"have ya seen whitey I can't find him anywhere?" He asks so I smirked giving Whitey a little kiss Ben if he tried to snog me he grabbed my breasts harder ripping the top of my dress to shreds to grope me though just my underdress his other hand pulling up the many skirts of my dress slapping on my bare skin to grope my arse his nails digging into my skin
"I uhh think he went down to the river bill for a bath" I answer
"ohh alright... I'll wait till he gets back then, ya see him tell him I need a word" he says
"will.do bill" I laugh and I heard him leave
"ummmm ummmm uhhhhh uhhh uhh!!!" He moans as he froze his jizz spurting out of his cocks head as his senses flooded with his orgasm "uhhhhh.....umm baby, you-you made me cum, thank you y/n" he groans exasughted
"humm your welcome" I giggled giving him and cuddle and a kiss
Sunday:
I sighed a little bored trying to read my little book but it was boring me so I threw it and ran out to the official opening the little door but the place was empty just bill sat at his desk eating a cookie
"Ohh mornin' Miss Y/n, something the matter?" he asks
"No bill, Where's whitey today?" I ask
"At home, I gave him the day off" he shrugs
"Ohh, okay. Thanks, Bill" I smile running off to whitey's place I noticed the front door was open so I looked inside but it was empty... where the hell is that dam boy? I looked around the corner and saw him stood sorting out his horse "Morning" I smile slyly putting my hands behind me and pushing out my chest he turned and smirked at me
"Mornin' Y/n" He smiles "Somethin' up?" he asks
"I believe that's your department Mr Winn" I smirk coming over stand between him and his horse he smirked holding me tightly wrapping his arms around my waist tight and giving my shoulder a kiss
"Is it now? somebodies in a good mood this mornin'" He laughs
"You see in a good mood too" I smirk giving him a little kiss and he instantly kissed me back pulling me against him
"Can ya blame me darlin' I got to cum for the first time in a week course I'm happy" He smirks "What are ya after y/n?" he asks
"Board, your fun"I giggle cuddling tightly into his chest
"Aww, thanks" He laughs
"What are you up to?" I ask him
"Ohh taking Ted out for a ride he hasn't gone out anywhere for a couple days," he explains
"Really? Well, where are you going to go?" I ask
"Not sure, down to the river? maybe up to the forest?" he shrugs
"Can I come?" I ask
"Aww Course ya can darlin'" He smiles "Come on y/n" he smiles helping me up onto his horse and a couple seconds later he got on just behind me giving my shoulder a little kiss and we slowly went off out of la Belle "So... where do ya wanna go darlin'" he asks
"The forest" I smile
"why? What's the matter with the river?" He asks
"I don't wanna go down the river, I wanna go into the forest" I smirk
"Ohh? come on tell me why?" he laughs giving me a tight cuddle
"I don't like the river to open, people can spy on us much easier" I laugh
"why ya plannin' on doin' somethin' ya don't want people to see us doin'?" he asks
"what do you think?" I smirk
"Well... we could do some stuff If ya wanted too darlin'" he smirks pulling me closer to him so that my back was tight against his front and I could feel how tight his pants were already getting
"Hurry up then" I smirk
"Hold on tight then baby" he smirks giving me a kiss and making the horse gallop off much faster "I know the real reason ya don't want to go to the river" he laughs
"Ohh why?" I ask
"It means we have to go past... that place don't we" He laughs
"Yes" I answer
"Why do ya not like that place?" he asks
"I don't mind the place, or the people I just don't want you going near... Her" I sigh
"Aww, really darlin' that's what you're worried about? Relax y/n I haven't seen her in months you don't have to worry your my girl" He says giving me a kiss
"No Louise?" I ask
"Not ever I promise," he says
"Whitey?" I ask
"yeah?" He asks
"How much further to the forest?" I ask him
"Not far now," he says "why? gettin' impatient my sweet?" He asks
"Maybe" I shrug moving my hips back a little to grind on him he laughed grabbing my hips
"Dirty girl" He smirks
"I learnt it from you Whitey" I smirk
"I better give ya your next lesson then baby" he smirks as we got to the edge of the forest as soon as we got deep enough for people not to see us I jumped off his horse and he jumped down after me holding his horse as we wondered a little more "so... What are ya plannin'?" he asks
"Secret's" I smirk taking the reins from his hand and tieing them to a branch close by the little steam so Ted could drink and not wander off I grabbed whitey's hand and ran off dragging him along with me
"Where are we goin' y/n?" he asks
"Here" I smirk pushing him against a tree
"Ohh? what are ya going to do to me today?" he asks
"Secret" I smirk
"Can ya do what ya did to me yesterday?" he asks
"maybe" I shrug
"Your evil" he complains grabbing my hand and slowly making my hand slipped down his chest towards his pants
"That's why you love me" I smirk kissing down his neck bitting at his soft skin a little
"True" he laughs as I undid his pants
"no whitey.... before I really get started when did ya last have a bath?" I ask him
"Yesterday" he answers and I just look at him "Friday" he shrugs
"Really?" I ask
"Wednesday" he sighs
"I don't believe you" I smirk slipping my hand in his pants and slowly rubbing his cock
"Monday! monday I swear" He answered
"Honest?" I ask slowly rubbing him harder
"I promise" he complains
"You went and had a bath the day you felt up my arse?" I ask him
"yeah" He answers
"Liar" I smirk pushing his pants down a little not enough to make them fall but enough to let his hard cock spring free "Tell me....else I won't keep going" I warn as I swept the ground with my hand just to check for sharp rocks and sticks before getting on my knees and giving his cock's head a soft kiss
"Uhh! Last Thursday" he moans
"that's much more then a week ago" I laugh
"I've been busy" he answers
"Ohh yeah doing what?" I ask licking down his shaft
"Uhhhh! Doin' you" He laughs
"You haven't done me yet, But I know what you meant" I chuckle
"Ya gonna do this to me or are ya just gonna be mean to me?" he asks
"Both" I shrug pressing kisses all over him
"Your a evil girl!" He complains
"and your a very dirty boy, we work well" I smirk
"You might think so" he sighs
"You don't?" I ask licking a line up from his base to his head
"uhh! No No I think so, I just hate being the horniest guy in La Belle stuck with a girl who just likes fuckin' tourchering me!" he complains
"You love it" I smirk lightly sucking on his head
"I do!" He groans rolling his head back against the tree "Uhh baby! Come on little further" He begs so I smirked taking almost all of him in my mouth all of him that would fit and sucking lightly "Aww... you finally being nice to me" He smirks putting his hand on my shoulder lightly rubbing my shoulder as he groaned and grunted sometimes bucking his hips towards my mouth "Uhhhh! Your mouth is amazin'" he groans "Didn't realize when I was just sticking my tongue in it, should have stuck my cock in earlier then this" he smirks
"Shut up whitey" I tell him grabbing his arse
"Ohhh! Dirty girl!" He smirks "Your learning a lot from me aren't ya darlin'" he smirks
"shut up whitey" I warn sucking on as much of him as I could and licking the pre-cum from his cocks head
"Uhhh! Okay!" He groaned having to bite his mouth so he wasn't screaming "Uhh baby! Uhh umm! Ohh god! baby girl!" he moans "I'm close already sweetheart" he smirks "Uhhh your mouth is magic" he smirks
so I moved my head slowly up and down his shaft he grabbed my hair trying to at first slow me down but he slowly started making me go faster I slapped his hands away so he couldn't touch me at all as I sucked taking the last inch or two of his cock that I couldn't fit in my mouth and slowly pumping him
"Uhhhh Fuck! your evil!" He screams "Please please baby! make me cum baby girl" he begs
"Not sure I should" I smirk pulling away to press tiny kisses to his close head "After you being such a dirty boy these last few days, and you got one yesterday" I laugh
"So! I need another one! Come on please!" he begs
"Well... we can make a deal?" I suggest
"What sort of deal?" he asks carefully
"Well if I'm going to do this for you... what will you do for me?" I ask him
"Hummm Babygirl, you have been spendin' to much time with me haven't ya" he smirks "Well... i guess tomorrow I could, Fuck ya?" he suggests
"Nope" I shrug going to move away
"No no! I uhh... I can pay you back later? an orgasm for an orgasm? how bout that?" he suggests
"Well you would owe me two actually whitey...counting yesterday" I smirk
"Okay! I will just please" he begs "Finish me please" he begs
"Alright" I smirk taking every inch of him I could in my mouth and licking up his shaft and head pumping anything I didn't have in my mouth within seconds he was groaning and screaming against the tree so I sucked as hard as I could his hips began bucking uncontrollably into my mouth he kept muttering my name and baby girl between his sharp jagged breaths
"Y/n... Slow down! I- I'm gonna-" he groaned cut off by his own moan so I just kept going "Uhhh! Uhhhhh UMMM Y/N!" He moans loudly the warm gunk spurting out his head onto my tongue it tasted odd like someone has mixed salt and sugar into a thick paste that was the best was to describe it "Ummmmm babygirl" he groans collapsing against the tree very tried I swallowed any I had in my mouth and licked any he had left on him getting up from my knees to cuddle close with him and he lazily cuddled me giving me a couple tiny kisses as we both playfully giggled "Your too good at that" he smirks
"am I?" I giggle
"Ya are, would think you had done that before" he smirks
"Nope, just to you" I smirk
"aren't I lucky" he smirks "Come on y/n let's get back before Bill sends a search party out lookin' for us" He chuckles doing his pants back up and taking my hand but I smirked flipping us over so I was against the tree pulling him as close as I could
"Aren't you forgettin' are little deal Mr winn?" I smirk
"Later darlin'" He smirks giving my head a kiss "I promise" he smiles
"Your a tease" I complain
"says the girl who just sucked my dick" He laughed
"I got you off didn't I!" I complain
"alright alright soon I swear" He laughs as we went back to his horse and he helped me up on it again and got on close behind me as we started to ride off back to La Belle
"whitey?" i ask resting my head on his chest and shoulder behind me
"Umm?" he asks concentrating on making sure Ted didn't take a mis step as we headed out the forest
"Have you ever fooled around with another girl?" I ask him
"No" He laughs "why do ya ask?" he asks and I shrug "Y/n" he warns
"You seem desperate like you haven't had it in a while" I laugh
"It's not that I haven't had it in a while it's that I haven't not someone else anyway, I haven't even touched myself for a good while now" he complains
"That bad?" I ask
"Well it has a withdrawal Y/n like most things do, but I seem fine just a bit more horny than normal "he shrugs
"This is normal?" I ask and he nods "Humm fun" I smirk
"My dad used to say I Played with myself to much I'd go blind" he laughs
"ya blind yet?" I ask
"Not yet, but I'm workin' on it" He smirks giving me a kiss "what about you? your mum and dad ever tell ya horror stories about touchin' ya self?" he asks
"No, they just told me not to do it, ever that I should not have an orgasm until my wedding night" I laugh
"why do I think ya broke that rule years ago?" he laughs
"I did" i smirk "I just don't do it as much as you do" I laugh
"Don't you? okay I last did last Friday, when was the last time you did?" he asks
"Wednesday" I smirk
"This Wednesday? you dirty girl" He smirk giving my head a kiss "Y/n?" he asks after a while
"yes whitey?" I ask
"do you like me calling ya baby?" He asks
"Eh" I shrug "Not to bothered by it" I shrug
"What about sweetheart?" he asks
"No, I'm not keen on that one" I complain
"What about darlin'?" he asks
"that's fine, it's innocent I suppose when other people are around" I smirk
"what about... babygirl?" he asks
"I like that one" I smirk "when we are alone" I smirk
"why just when we are alone? it's just babygirl? it's innocent enough around other people" he shrugs
"True" I smile cuddling closer to him
"Aww, ya gettin' sleepy babygirl?" he asks
"little" I sigh "I always get sleepy when I'm frustrated" I complain
"Ohh... well, Okay" he smirks putting his hand he wasn't using to control the horse to sit on my leg "Come on, I've never done this before y/n give me some kinda idea what I'm doing" he laughs
"Just get in the right area whitey I'll direct you from there" I laugh
"Well, okay" he blushed slipping his hand up my leg up to my thigh his thumb rubbing a little on my hip
"whitey?" I laugh
"yeah?" he asks
"Hint" I suggest "Under the dress" I tell him
"Ohh! right" he blushed "Sorry" he smiled giving my head a kiss and tugging up my dress to try and get his hand under having to keep grabbing at my many petticoats on my dress "How many bloody layers are in this thing?" he complains
"I forget" i shrug he made ted stop a moment and used both his hands
"one, two, three, four, five,six, seven, eight! how are you not boiling?" he asks
"There very thin" i smirk
"Ohh are they" he smirks slipping his hand under my dress layers and making ted wonder on again "Humm there we are" he smirks
"Underdress whitey" i laugh
"Ohh for god sake!" he complains going under my undergarments too "Ohhh... hello, your skin is very sofa babygirl" he smirks running his hand down my thigh
"what happens when you actually wash every other day whitey" I laugh
"really? Tell me y/n am i the first one to touch ya?" he asks and I nod "Good" he smirks moving his hand up to hold my waist stroking my bare skin "Ummm, i like feelin' ya up, under your clothes" he smirks
"better then over them?" i ask
"Course it is" he smirks moving his hand down to grab my arse "Uhhh yeah, Babygirl, I love your ass so much" he smirks grabbing it hard
"aren't we meant to be doing something else whitey?" I ask
"Ohh right, sorry your too sexy, I got distracted" he smirks moving his hand around to my tummy I moved the skirts of my dress a little so if anyone did spot us it would just look like he was holding me carefully so I wouldn't fall he slipped his hand down pressing little kisses to my neck but got confused
"Underwear whitey" i laugh
"Ohh come on!" he complains "you don't normally wear this much clothes" he sighs "ya didn't the other day?" he smirks
"I know well I have to ride a horse, don't want to be doing that with hardly any layers on"I laugh
"Alright, but... I don't want to see you with this much on under your dress again? we clear babygirl?" he asks and I nod
"Good girl" he smirks slipping his hand under my underwear "so...where am i going?" He asks I whispered it to him and he blushed a little I concentrated on the pretty scenery as his hand moved so His thumb rubbed on my clit I almost choaked he saw me and smirked doing it a little harder I almost groaned grabbing his jumper as I snuggled close to him "Aww, do ya like this babygirl?" he asks and I nod snuggling into his neck a little more and he kissed my head as he got a little faster I went to grab his arm "what is it?" he asks
"up and down whitey, and little circles, rubbing not trying to kill me" I warn him
"sorry, thought faster and harder was better?" he asks
"Not always with girls" I tell him as I kissed and sucked on his neck to stop myself from moaning or screaming to much as he slowly and carefully played with my clit the slow stepping and bouncing of the horse actually making me feel a little more needy like with every time I bounced up a little I wanted whitey's cock to me under me to fill the needy desire of my pussy "Whitey... a little faster" I smirk
"Humm horny girl" he smirks speeding up a little rubbing directly on my clit
"Uhhh whitey!" I groan
"Ohh ya like this? am I doin' somethin' right?" he asks
"yeah" I groan snuggling close to him "don't move your hand" I tell him
"Ohh? really? alright then babygirl" he smirks rubbing on my clit a little faster
"Ummmm whitey" I moan
"Uhh! I like you moaning for me, it's hot and sexy babygirl" he smirks lightly grinding his half hard cock on my back "Uhhh come on baby I wanna see ya cum for me" he smirks and I bit down on his neck already feeling close
"uhhhhh! Whitey!" I scream pulling him to kiss me as I felt my orgasm rush though me holding his jumper tightly he kissed me back gently rubbing on my clit as I calmed down
"Awww, babygirl did I do good?" he asks
"Very very very good whitey" I smirk caressing his face and giving him a kiss
"humm okay, come on we need to get back" he smiles taking his hand away from me and making ted gallop off back to La Belle.
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willexxmercer · 5 years
Text
The 100 Ask Game
Alright here we go!  I was tagged by @boomheda and I think I’m gonna tag @brillermcintyre and anyone else who wants to do this!
1. What station on the Ark would you be from?
idk Hydra Station I guess? I like water.  idek
2. What would you get arrested for on the arc?
Hmmm it would probably be something dumb like illegal downloads or like, stealing meds or food or something for someone I love
3. Would you take off your wristband when you landed on the ground?
Probably not, although once it came to “take off the wristband or no food” thing, I mean... I’m hungry.
4. What would the necklace Finn would make for you look like? (Clarke: a deer Raven: a raven duh)
An otter!
5. If you could resurrect any minor character who would it be?
Does Monroe count as a minor character?  If not, then Fox
6. Create a squad of characters to go on a mission with, who are they?
Echo, Bellamy, Raven, Harper, and... um... Murphy for the sass
7. What grounder clan would you belong to?
100% Floukru
8. What would your name be in Trigedasleng? ( Octavia = Okteivia)
Katrina = Kutreena?
9. Thoughts on Finn? Some people hate him and others love him so im curious.
I genuinely liked him in early s1, but once the whole cheating thing started I just...couldn’t take him anymore.  Then I felt sorry for him in s2 but not enough to care about his fate tbh.  I was more sad for Raven than for him.
10. Be honest. How willing would you have been to take the chip without knowing the horrible things that it does?
Yeah no.  I am a naturally cautious person and someone telling me “this will take away all your pain” would make me go “yeah right”
11. What character do you relate to the most?
Bellamy for the protective older sibling vibes, Monty for the “let’s all just get along” vibes
12. What character do you like the least?
Right now, of the living characters, probably Kane and Abby.  I just... don’t get how they can look at their situation in the Bunker and continue to put all the blame on Octavia
13. Describe your delinquent outfit. (would you wear something like Murphy’s jacket with the spikey shoulder patch or have a trademark like Jasper’s goggles? be creative, but practical.)
Hmmm I have the worst fashion sense but let’s see.  Probably jeans and hiker boots, and a graphic tee with some kind of jacket over it.  Maybe some fleece involved in the jacket.  Trademark item would be a headband like Harper’s and braids... like Harper’s.
14. Favourite mutant type?
Two headed-deer
15. What would your job on the ark be?
Definitely a teacher
16. Would you have willingly pumped Ontari’s heart if Abby asked?
NOPE I would be in the corner vomiting
17. If Lexa wasn’t Heda, but she was still alive then who would have made the best heda?
I would say definitely Luna
18. How would you act if you ate the hallucinogenic nuts like jasper and monty?
Giggling in the corner alone
19. How would you have dealt with Charlotte’s crime? A more John Murphy or Bellamy blake approach?
I would have organized a trial, probably
20. Who should have been chancellor if anyone?
MONTY had the best heart and would have been the best chancellor.
21.  Would you have been on Pike’s side like Bellamy or on Kane’s side? or Clarke in Polis.
I probably would have been a silent supporter of Kane.  Like, not actively working with the rebellion but definitely supportive of him.
22. Mount Weather had a lot of modern commodities (eg- Maya’s ipod) What is one thing you would have taken?
The iPod or a book
23. What would your grounder tattoos look like? hairstyle? war paint?
Being from Floukru, I’d probably have wavy tattoos to represent water.  Hair would be mostly down, but with braids (a la Harper), and war paint would be blue and green, again in a wavy pattern
24. Favourite quote?
“Let’s show them how to live”
25. If all of the characters were in the Hunger games who would have the best shot at winning?
Probably Lexa or Roan.  Or maybe Octavia could pull off the whole “hiding until everyone tires themselves out” trick
26. Least Favourite ship? Favourite canon ship? Favourite non canon ship? NOT INCLUDING CL OR BC OR BE
Least Fave: Finn/Clarke
Fave canon: Marper
Fave non-canon: Sea Mechanic
27. A song that should be included in next season? if there had to be another guest star like Shawn Mendes on the show, who would you want to make a cameo?
Song: Demons - Imagine Dragons
Guest Star: Imma copy Luce and say Marie’s dog
28. What would you do if you were stuck in the bunker with Murphy for all that time?
A whole lot of talking to try and keep us occupied
29. You’re an extra that gets killed off. How do you die?
Black rain lol
30. A character you’d like to learn more about and get flashbacks of?
Echo!  And definitely Josephine
31. A character you’d bang?
Bellamy, Echo, Niylah, Raven.....
32. Would you stay in the bunker? Go up to space? or live in your own Eden?
Eden
33. In the bunker, would you follow Octavia? What would you do to pass the time?
I’d support Octavia until Bloodreina begins, and then I’d try to silently fly under the radar.  Probably try to help teach the young ones and read a lot, maybe keep a journal, but I’d definitely try to stay out of the way
34. What crime would you commit in the Bunker that lands you in the fighting pits?
If I was a teacher, I could see myself accidently sharing a detail that I’m “not supposed to teach about” and that being the thing
35. Up in space who do you bond with first? Who would be the most difficult for you to get along with?
Bond with Harper definitely, Murphy would be a bit difficult because I don’t do well with abrasive people
36.How long do you think you would last on Earth by yourself?
A couple of days, max
37. When the Eligius ship lands what do you do?
Hide
38. Favourite Eligius character? least favourite?
Fave: Diyoza
Least fave: McCreary
39. Would you spacewalk?
Nope, I’d be terrified
40. Would you prefer to eat windshield bugs, space algae or Bunker meat?
Probably space algae?
41. Would you start a war for the last spot of green on Earth? what would you do to avoid it?
I would not start a war.  I’d try to arrange a parlay with all of the leaders to talk about it and maybe divide it
42. Would you rather dig out flesh eating worms or stick thumb drives into a bullet hole?
Thumb drives.  Although I’d probably pass out for both
43. Are you willing to Poison your sister for the traitor who you love? what would you do to stop Octavia?
I would never poison my sister.  There’s a theme going here, but I’d talk to her and try to explain things
44. Would you go to sleep in cryo or stay awake like Marper?
I’d probably go into Cryo
45. Who are you waking up first to explore the new planet?
Raven, Bellamy, Niylah, Miller, Shaw, Indra
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thepleasureisguilty · 5 years
Text
misty morning~ were wolf au pt 3
ongoing rp with @ask-a-slippery-boy part 3 of 3 
part1: https://thepleasureisguilty.tumblr.com/post/180510647144/into-the-woods-werewolf-au
part 2: https://thepleasureisguilty.tumblr.com/post/180510912084/howls-throughout-the-night-were-wolf-au-pt-2
SFW~ (ish) has conversation about happenings from previous night, being sore etc. does contain: long drawn out after care  and allot of dog and wolf puns... enjoy! 
thepleasureisguilty
*the sun begins to rise, i am so happy i have been able to ease this process for you. I take a few moments to take in the wolf scent, i savor  the feeling of your fur... And the light hits you*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I give you a long final lick followed by a howl before the light hits me. Like before I’m seized with pain as my body cracks and snaps. Instead of growing I’m folding in on myself like a spy glass. Each pop brings a new wave of pain. My howls and snarls become more like screams and moans. I’m slowly turning back to normal under you.  I dig my fingers into the dirt and shake violently as the changes grip me.*
thepleasureisguilty
*I hold you through the change being mindful that im not crushing you during this already painful experience, i am overwhelmingly excited to talk to you again and see the look on your face when you realize I "layed with the dogs" all night. *
ask-a-slippery-boy
*there’s a few loud final cracks before my body is finally still. The pain fades from me and I tremble from relief as it leaves me.* M-mast... *my mouth feels wrong. Formulating words is a struggle all it’s own. My voice is raspy and faint.* Im not on the tree...? *I sit upright quickly with a yelp* mast! Mast are you okay? Did I hurt you??? Did I???? *I hold you at arms length and look your body up and down. There’s the bite, but I did that before I turned. But you’re covering in scratches and dirt. Tears well in my eyes and I hold you close to me* Mast Oh Mast I’m so so sorry. Are are you okay?? Darling oh my love...
thepleasureisguilty
*I hover over you, now wanting to touch you and make it worse, your fluids dripping from my entrance and onto you as you still. i am relieved when you a make up and hold you close when you sit up. I rest your head against my chest and straddle back down on you, petting you lovingly.* ilya you were extremely gentle with me the entire night... You earned the name good boy
thepleasureisguilty
*I pet your hair lovingly and kiss your cheek* ilya I am fine! I am happy! You have nothing to apologize for *I pull your face back to look at me* you protected and cared for your mate so well *i rub our noses together*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I look at you concerned* B-but I bit you! I mean I was lucid for that, but I was so horny I wasn’t in control really... and you’re all scratched up... and dirty... *I pull you back against me. I’m so tired, my limbs are shaking with the effort of sitting up but I’m so worried.* Darling are you sure you’re okay?
thepleasureisguilty
Comon my love *I pet your hair and smile loosening your chains* lets get you in that hammock handsome
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I suppose I can question you about the night when I wake up. I don’t remember most of it. Just how good it felt to be with you, my mate. Once free of the chains I pull myself up using the tree with a whimper* fuck... god... I’m too tired to interrogate you but I will in a few hours
thepleasureisguilty
*I stand up with a wince, cum still pouring down my legs, i can rest later, right now i need to be strong for you. I wrap your arm around my neck and shoulder and lead you to the hammock, i lay you down and hobble over to my bag, collecting the wool blanket, a biscuits and the bottle of water, i hobble back over and lay the blanket over you* hehe talk about a wolf in sheep's clothing *I laugh a bit at my own joke, both being proud of it and trying to raise your spirits*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I shoot you a look when you wince, i don’t like the look of that. But the cum pouring down your legs more or less answers that question for me.  I do my best to hold you and help you walk too, but when you lay me down I basically collapse. I’m nearly asleep already when you make it back. I pull you into the hammock with me and wrap my arms around you.* I’d bark with laughter, but that joke wasn’t worth it. *I grin but it’s broken by a long yawn*
thepleasureisguilty
Ha neither was that joke *i smile and open the cork to the bottle* here drink something before falling asleep love
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I don’t have the energy to sit up so I pour the water into my mouth from here and inevitably spill some on my face. Not that I have enough energy to give a shit. I pass it back to you* T-thanks Mast. I... it’s better with you here. So thank you for coming...
thepleasureisguilty
* i take a swig and place back on the cork, setting the bottle to the side* darling... I dont want you to go through this by yourself ever again...
ask-a-slippery-boy
*i yawn again* L-let’s talk about it when we wake up... I’m so tired... I can’t think too good... I love being with you but... safety? I just... we need to talk more about it... when I’m not falling asleep, or really wolf horny...*I pull you close to me* but thank you for being here. I love you. You’ve made this whole thing much better...
thepleasureisguilty
We will *I kiss your head and hold you close* we will ilya well talk about everything *kisses head* rest now my love *I pet you and humm to you softly as you fall asleep in my arms, i am brought back to my hiding hole, sketching beetles and little matters of wildlife... I was so lonely then... Now in this hammock there is you... I cant help but take that as a metaphor for you entering my life and hopefully staying here... I hold you similarly to how you held me the entire night , protective, loving, kind... Your my mate... I love you so much*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I fall asleep almost instantly. I don’t dream really. I sleep too deep for that. My body and mind are still aside from my breathing and the beating of my heart. Normally this time is so filled with struggle and pain. I could have never of imagined how much better it would be if I had you here by my side. I’m not scared to deal with the consequences when I wake up, I’m just excited to see you again.*
thepleasureisguilty
*I hold you and stroke your hair while you sleep, occasionally dozing off from my own exhaustion. And occasionally shaking myself awake, wanting to be there for you the same way you were for me last night* my wonderful mate... I want to always be here for you... *i whisper into your hair as you slumber*
*after a while of fighting it, i fell into a deep slimber as well*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*Early afternoon light shines brightly into my eyes. I groan and hide my face into your neck. I’m vaguely aware of my surroundings but my whole body aches. Especially my pelvis for some reason. I’m not ready to wake up yet. I nuzzle my face deep into your hair to pretend that I never woke up. It won’t last, but I can pretend.*
thepleasureisguilty
*I wake to your nuzzling and nuzzle back kissing your neck gently taking a deep breath of your scent, still feeling animalistic from the night*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*As the sun shifts it shines down and warms the blanket and makes us extra toasty. I still don’t want to wake up. Sunburn be damned. I find your hands and hold them. I yawn and  press deeper to you*
thepleasureisguilty
*I hold your hands sleepily and become more awake and persistent with my neck kisses for you*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I groan as you kiss my neck. My body feels like lead. I have a bit of a headache. To be honest I’m in a foul mood. But it’s softened by your presence. It’s difficult for me to find things to be irritated about when I’m in your arms. I brace myself and open one eye to look at you. Gods it’s so bright. And gods you look stunning, maybe a little worse for wear, but some joe still so stunning just the same. I give your hands a little squeeze.*
thepleasureisguilty
*I gaze at you lovingly* would you like some breakfast?
*i can tell you are upset, groggy, cranky, like a hangover on steroids . thankfully i know how much food helps you*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I swallow. Speaking seems enormously difficult. Despite being so pissy, I’m doing my best not to take it out in you, who by the way, I am deeply grateful for.* Breakfast would be phenomenal... *My stomach growls in agreement* but sadly I can’t get up, nor can I bare to part with you. *I swing a leg over yours to anchor you down*
thepleasureisguilty
*I let out a chuckle* i was afraid of that *i present you with the cloth full of biscuits from my bag* eat up darling I'll make ham and eggs when we get our energy back *I smile at you and kiss your chest lovingly* i know your upset my love, but its all okay. Its over now till next month *I nuzzle into your neck giving into the cuddles*
ask-a-slippery-boy
Mast, you are truly miraculous. *I fumble to untie the cloth and pass you a biscuit. I can’t really sit up, but I practically stuff a whole biscuit in my mouth while you talk. I moan as I chew it. Fuck it’s delicious.* I-I’m sorry for being so groggy... I do really appreciate you being here.
thepleasureisguilty
Haha ilya, you have no need to apologize you just turned into a giant horny wolf man for the night! Haha I'm just glad your okay *I nibble on my biscuit happily, i am fairly hungry myself*
ask-a-slippery-boy
About that *I swallow the rest of my biscuit* are you really alright? I... I can’t imagine last night was easy for you. Whatever happened.... actually could you tell me what happened, when you feel up to it? It’s all rather fuzzy for me at best, no pun intended...
thepleasureisguilty
*I swallow my biscuit too* I must admit I bit off more than i thought when I told you i wanted to be bred yesterday haha... You handled me with care the entire night though, even the light scratches on my body... I know you were holding back allot... It seemed like you just simply wanted to be as close with me as possible.
ask-a-slippery-boy
That would explain why my pelvis in particular is so damned sore. *I put a hand on your thigh* I’m sure it must be far worse for you. I do recall... well... er... it’s rather /bigger/ than usual. Mast... I’m sorry if I pushed you too far last night. Is there anything I can do now to help?
thepleasureisguilty
*I flush, a lot of last night was animal instinct for me as well, i expected the moment i agreed that. It would probably be rough... We luckily have been resting the past few days so that makes me not /as/ sore...* ...im sore, there is no hiding that, but i figured i was going to be *I smile at you* you didn't push me too far star strand, it hurts but its also an experience I wouldn't want to remove from my life...... Did.. Did it help you at all? Do you feel any better today because of it?
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I frown* I’m sorry that you’re sore... I... Ive never done anything sexual in wolf mode before... I er... well I didn’t know it would be... like that... *Im blushing pretty obviously. I hadn’t even though about the changes my cock itself would go through. Let alone using it.*  A-anyways... it did help that I wasn’t trying to get away all night. Usually I wake up with grooves carved into me from pulling against the chains all night. I’ve dislocated my shoulder before... and the one time I did get out I had burns from the silver... so thank you for giving me a reason to want to stay...
thepleasureisguilty
*I cup your cheek with my hand* well you did not hurt yourself on the chains , you havent been burned and everything is in place... I call that a successful night *i smile and kiss you softly* the best thing you can do for the next few days is not hump me *I smile and chuckle a bit, lightening the mood*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*Im still really worried about you, but I kiss you back softly and chuckle with you* Mast, I dont think I could hump you if I wanted too... those muscles are very spent. *I pull you into a slightly deeper kiss* I mean, on the other hand..  if you wanted to hump me *I tease with a wink. I suspect we’ll both be pretty spent for the next day or so at least. But... but for the most part you seem to be alright. And having you here did make everything so much better for me, as selfish as I feel about it...*
thepleasureisguilty
Haha I'll need a few meals first my love *I kiss you smiling* i am okay ilya... I'm just sore *I pet your hair and scritch behind your ear again* your a good boyyyyyy
ask-a-slippery-boy
I can’t imagine why *i tease. I flush deeply when you call me a good boy* I- I... well... you know! I ... I just... and you!! Well... I.... *I hide my face with my hands*
thepleasureisguilty
*i giggle at your reaction* your so fucking adorable *I begin rubbing your belly with my other hand*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I hide my face from you in the covers. It was harder to be embarrassed about this when I was uncontrollably horny.*
thepleasureisguilty
Hehehe *I scritch at the side of your tummy * such a sweet boy
ask-a-slippery-boy
You’re so mean! *I tease from the safety of the blankets* did you come all the way out here just to tease me? Fate is a cruel mistress but not half as cruel as you!
thepleasureisguilty
*I scratch your tummy with both hands * you are in love with this cruel mistress my darling *I purr and laugh mischievously as i attack*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I gather my limited strength to throw my hands out of the blanket and grab yours. I pull them to my mouth and pretend to bite one of your fingers before kissing the rest of them* Mast I am /so/ in love with this cruel mistress
thepleasureisguilty
Ahh!!! Do i have to muzzle you again * I bark laughing*
ask-a-slippery-boy
Oh come on now love, my bark is worse than my bite
thepleasureisguilty
*i laugh* I would make you howl if i wasnt so tired
ask-a-slippery-boy
I’d make another pun if I wasn’t in such a bad mood. *I roll over and yawn. Normally I’d suck it up and stumble back through the woods so I can go home. But.. but being with you is far more satisfying than being at home will ever be. I’m happy to just spend some time in the woods with you.*
thepleasureisguilty
*I hold you in a big spoon position* dawww grumpy puppy
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I shake my ass against you too be cheeky* I’m you’re grumpy puppy
thepleasureisguilty
*I buck against you gently* haha yes you are... Is there anything i can do to raise your spirits my wolfy lover. *I nuzzle into the back of your neck*
ask-a-slippery-boy
Yes, there is ... *I wrap my arms around yours* hold me tighter
thepleasureisguilty
*I smile and wrap you in a tighter hug nuzzling my face into your back and kissing you, i also try to wrap my leg around you but wince a bit from being sore*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I smile to myself when you nuzzle into me. But I notice that you wince when you try and swing your leg. I roll over to face you and wrap my own leg over you. I kiss your cheek* I really am sorry for pushing you past your limits
thepleasureisguilty
*I smile* ilya... Do you feel any closer to me today than yesterday?...
thepleasureisguilty
*I nestle myself into your neck, waiting for your response, last night felt like ... Yet another bond was made between us... Or at lease between me and wolf you... I dont even know how i would go about a conversation like that... It wasnt just you rawing me... There was something else behind it too ...at least i thought there was...*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I rest a hand on your cheek* You know? I think I feel a little closer to you with each passing day. There's always something new, another reason that makes me proud to be by your side. But... this is something I've never told anyone... It's a fairly new affliction.. . I I'm still figuring it out. I don't remember much from last night, but I do remember how incredibly right it felt to be with you. I remember feeling whole, happily mated, and bound to you for life.  I... I don't think I've ever felt like that before. I don't think I've ever felt perfectly content, partnered, and without anxieties or doubts. It's true that I had limited capacity for second thoughts or worries, but.. but I think it means something that I felt so deeply content just to share my life with you. Underneath all the needless worrying, there's just love for you
so... yes. I do feel closer.
sorry, I realize I kind of rambled there... its alright if you dont feel the same way I just... wanted you to know that's how I feel
thepleasureisguilty
*I lay there and listen to you talk and bring my face out of your neck when you finish* ...ilya... Thank you so much for trusting me with this part of you, i promise to make these nights as easy for you as possible...i I felt very primal last night... Unable to really communicate with you through words, but when ever I looked into your eyes..  There you were, this grey and red that looks into me.... It felt right to mate with you... Even with the pain.. It felt like it was much more of a bond forming than just trying to get off. It seemed like you wanted me specifically to be there, and even though you were sore too... You wanted to breed me!... And... I wanted you too.... Ilyashka I love you and i am honored to be your life mate! I only hope i can keep up with you *I kiss you softly*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I kiss you back but look at you a little bashful when we part.* He... I... the wolf... I I think "mating" is serious business for him... like I dont recall very well, but I think last night I did have every intention of breeding you for real, of raising "pups" with you... of being bound with you, for life even... *I brush your hair behind your ear and flush* I-it still doesn't sound like a bad deal to me...     *I look away for a moment to collect myself. All that being said...* Mast we do need to talk seriously though... I agreed to let you come here because I was being selfish. And gods it is so much better with you here, but... but I don't know if you should come back. Its so dangerous for you mast! even when i was trying to be gentle I hurt you!  I... I don't want to put you at risk!
thepleasureisguilty
*I flush too* pups huh.... *I try to think about what it would be like to raise a family with you, us adopting a orphan off the street and giving them a loving home .... You would make a wonderful papa there's no mistake about that... I never thought of myself as having "pups" before you...* oh yes we do need to talk about this... We need a more comfortable situation for you... You were in misery allot of the night that you were chained up, it was uncomfortable for you! No wonder you hurt yourself trying to get out! I want to make you a little bed to put out here! I want you to have food and water available through out the night, a full meal before and after, i also want a to build a fire for you, its winter soon you'll get cold without moving.
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I blink at you* Mast.... *Of course you would be thinking about me. You're so kind and loving to me, I actually feel a touch of guilt, like I don't deserve it. Old habits die hard.* Mast I'm not trying to talk about me right now... Its dangerous  for you to be any more involved than you already are. Mast I.... *a lump forms in my throat* I couldn't live with myself if I ever seriously hurt you....
thepleasureisguilty
Would you prefer it if i wasnt here while you were full wolf? I dont think you'll hurt me... But i want you to be comfortable... *a rock is in the base of my stomach... I want to be here for him but not if it will upset him so much *
ask-a-slippery-boy
I... *Gods I want you here so badly. The previous nights have been just short of agonizing. But with you? Yes I spent some of it in pain, but mostly... mostly I was overjoyed. I don't want to be alone again. * I... *I bury my face into your chest* How could I be so selfish as to ask you to stay?
thepleasureisguilty
*I hold you close* you dont have to be... I want to stay with you ilya... I want to support you through these nights *I really do, i want to be a comfort to you in this harsh experience and also be kinder to you than you have been to yourself*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I hold you tightly* but what if something happens? What if I turn you? Or what if I really hurt you by accident?
thepleasureisguilty
Then we would deal with it together *i kiss your head* you are a doctor ilya, with a almost functioning clinic, you could fix any scratches you might give me and as for turning me? That just means well ve chained to a tree together. *i smile down at you*
ask-a-slippery-boy
I I I love you so much mast... I I just don't want to see you hurt... *I frown up at you* I do want you to be here! I just... I just don't want anything bad to happen to you if I become careless
thepleasureisguilty
*I stare down at you and cup your face* if WE become careless.... Your no longer alone ilya....
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I hold your hand to my face* I.... I know that I’m not alone but.... but if WE become careless it’s YOU who will get hurt....
thepleasureisguilty
*I nuzzle the hand* then lets try to not be careless *I smile at you*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I scan your face for a second before taking a deep breath* okay... we won’t be careless
thepleasureisguilty
*i kiss your cheek* is there anything else you want to talk about darling? Any other issues you have?
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I have countless concerns, and countless worries. I have more what if’s than I have energy to say them all. But I also have you. I hold your hands and give them a squeeze* .... just promise me you’ll tell me if it gets to be too much... please don’t continue on helping me if it becomes too much of a burden. Promise me you’ll take care of yourself first.
thepleasureisguilty
*I smile at you softly * deal. And I want you to take better care of yourself too... I'm serious about making this more comfortable for yourself
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I relax some when you agree* Okay, I'll work on taking better care of myself too.
thepleasureisguilty
*I push our foreheads together* good
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I wrap my arms around you with a yawn* And speaking of taking better care of ourselves... Darling I am so tired. Can I seduce you into a nap?
thepleasureisguilty
Haaha yes you may *I snuggle into you and am.ost immediately fall asleep*
ask-a-slippery-boy
Oh thank gods... *I tease. As you settle back into me sleep takes me easily. *
thepleasureisguilty
*I stirr hours later, the sun is beginning to set and it is getting colder out, i rise and check on your breathing, your sleeping soundly, my stomach twists in hunger... I think it's about time we both eat something*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I only stir because you do.* mmmm Mast? *I yawn and my stomach growls loudly* jeez... *I sit up with a groan and rest against you*  good morning..?
thepleasureisguilty
Haha good morning *I kiss your forehead* i'm starving, mind if i make some food for us?
ask-a-slippery-boy
*my stomach growls impatiently in response* Please..... Can I help at all?
thepleasureisguilty
*I roll out and hit the ground with a o of * oof! Haha no i got it love *I am weaker than i thought i would be but I can wobble over to my bag and get my flint and steel, luckily with it being late fall there is allot of dried leaves and sticks around, i pick up a few and clear a small spot near the hammock making a tp formation and striking the flint and steel together, it forms little sparks that burn through the leaves but are not going up in flame... I eventually catch it though and get the little fire going. I pull out the bacon and eggs and a tiny pan and begin cooking*
*i lay the bacon, it pops and sizzles as it cooks, making my mouth water and slicking the pan with grease. I take the bacon out and crack the eggs in 3 for me and 5 for you, it gives a satisfying sizzle onto the grease and all but the yoke cook thankfully quickly, while it is cooking i ace my clothes back on as best as i can, it is cold out bit the fire is comforting*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I wince as I watch you hobble away. You said you had it, but I’m still worried. I sit up and stretch. I feel like every one of my joints needs to be popped. I ease my self carefully out of the hammock. And promptly lose balance once I’m back on the ground. I hold the tree for dear life while I get my bearing. Once my stance has firmed up I stumble over to my clothes and shimmy into them. I collect the silver I placed in a wide ark around the tree. Touching them still tingles slightly. But only slightly. When I make my way back to you you’ve already got food well on the way of being done. I put the silver back in my bag and lay the blanket from the hammock over your shoulders. I kiss your head.* Mast, you really are amazing... *I sit besides you, the fire makes me feel cozy. The food smells phenomenal. I press myself to your side* Honestly mast... thank you so much for all you’ve done for me, specifically last night and today. I... I really appreciate it. And you.
thepleasureisguilty
*I instinctively hold up a arm to catch you when you almost fall, granted i do nothing more than give your tummy a good squeeze , you were already latched to the tree,  a sense of warmth and coziness falls over me when you lay the blanket on my shoulders and kiss my head, i open a wing of the blanket and wrap it around your shoulder as well when you come to sit next to me* ...ilya... I meant it when i said i was here for you... Always here for you... *I kiss your head* I love you ilya
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I hold your hand to my face and kiss you palm.* As gentle as you'd like me to be
*When you offer a wing of the blanket to me I snuggle in close to you and rest my head on your shoulder. * Mast, love, thank you so much for being there for me. Thank you for all of your love and support. *I kiss your cheek* And I'll always be here for you. I want to be by your side through anything.
thepleasureisguilty
*I kiss your head* well that will make telling you i'm a vampire so much easier!!! *i give you a devious smirk*
ask-a-slippery-boy
*I look at you, exasperated. Normally I'd assume you were joking but after everything we've been through it's not out of the question. Either way. I lean my head to the side to expose my neck* Oh? are you feeling thirsty?
and thats it! hope you all liked it! please feel more than welcome to tell @ask-a-slippery-boy and or i what you think! 
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