#im genuinely so nervous to post now bc u guys seem so excited

[adrinktostopyourthirst]

Bucky Barnes | Series | Pride and Privacy

Pride and Privacy Masterlist - part IV

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Nurse!Reader

Warnings: 18+. Smut, fluff and angst.

Plot: Seems like the roles are reversed...

Words: 4,2OO

“Would you stop being such a pouty child?!”

Bucky crosses his arms and rolls his eyes at his therapist telling him off. He can’t help it that she makes him incredibly grumpy. After his last session, he felt wary to come back. He seriously debated flaking on Raynor this morning, but she would have him for dinner. So he dragged himself out of bed and made his way to his favourite therapist.

He told her to be glad he showed up when she started complaining about his terrible mood from the moment he stepped foot into her office. He’s been grouchy for days now, moping all around the apartment and getting on Sam’s nerves as well. The simmering tension between you and Bucky is really starting to get to him. Who knew blue balls could get you this riled up?

“I’m not a child.”

“No, you’re a 107 years old. Act like it.”

“What do you want from me?”

Dr. Raynor tries to keep her composure and forces herself to sit back into her chair opposite to Bucky.

“I want you to start enjoying life. Times have changed. Masculinity has changed. Your pride shouldn’t get in the way of your emotions anymore.” She explains to him.

Dr. Raynor needs progress. As a therapist, she’d rather let him figure this out himself, but he doesn’t seem to catch on. So she decides to tell him what she has been trying to get across during the last few sessions, understanding that Bucky has been struggling with other people’s expectations of him his entire life. “You can admit to being happy about the little things. It won’t dent your reputation.”

Bucky reluctantly uncrosses his arms and visibly surrenders to her words, trying to understand what she’s saying. Her words sound familiar. It could have very well been something you would tell him. So for the sake of taking Dr. Raynor seriously, he pretends it’s you talking.

“What are you saying?”

“You can stop the brooding and the pride, because it is getting in your way.” She explains with a gentle voice now, glad to have a small break through in trying to get him to drop his guard.

“How do I do that?” He asks after a moment of puzzling with her words in his mind. He understands what she’s saying, but where the hell does he start off?

“Has there been anyone you can be vulnerable around? Someone who treats you with respect when you do?”

One name immediately pops into his mind, but he decides to move further back. “…In Wakanda. I was safe to be …broken there.”

Bucky’s thoughts bring him back to the campfire with Ayo and his heart aches. Raynor smiles and nods in an attempt to encourage him to continue opening up to her. When he falls quiet, she takes it as her queue to question him further, “Anyone that can offer it to you now? Sam, maybe?”

Bucky knows the answer. He knows perfectly well who allows him to be vulnerable and he hates it.

“Yeah… Sam.”

…

Right after his appointment with Dr. Raynor, Bucky wanted to head straight home like always after his sessions. When his phone beeps with a message referring to one of the loose ends from their previous mission, Bucky heaves a deep sigh and turns around. He meets up with Sam to finish everything up with the intention of being back home in time for dinner, hopefully with you.

Turns out, that little mission takes them two whole days because of a strong miscalculation that had them fighting for their lives all night. So after getting dropped off in front of his apartment complex, he drags himself towards the elevator and barely makes it through the door.

Bucky’s face is covered in bruises and dried up blood and he has deep cuts in his ear, nose and abdomen. He’s pretty sure he heard something crack somewhere. Whether it’s his nose, his ribs or both, he isn’t sure. His injuries have lessened slightly, but he still feels completely wrecked.

The apartment is completely dark and Bucky peers at the clock, the streetlights allowing him to see that it is currently around 2:50am. Trying to remain as quiet as possible, he slumps his aching body into the couch, stifling a groan when his ribs jab into his lung. Carefully, he lies back against the back of the couch and tries to lift his feet to untie his boots.

“Might as well have come in with a parade.”

Bucky jumps at your voice, grimacing when his ribs send another rippling ache through his body. He watches you walk over on your bare feet, wearing some thin pyjama shorts with a big t-shirt. Bucky stares at you, staying quiet as his features contort in focus. He is surprised you’re still awake, but your voice sounds broken and groggy, so maybe you he did wake you up by coming in.

You crouch down in front of him and gently unravel the ties of his boots, helping him out. Bucky leans back with his arm across his torso, trying to focus on his breathing. Whilst relieving his feet, you look up at him, the faint light in the room highlighting just how rough his mission had been.

Getting up and moving through the apartment, you collect some of your things to tend to his injuries. Bucky studies your every move, not daring to speak as you move around. When you sit down on the couch next to him, his eyes remain trained on your actions.

Raising your hand, you gently clean his face with a washcloth to reveal the actual damage that’s left. You swallow hard when Bucky’s intense stare doesn’t falter, so you force yourself to focus on the task at hand. The apartment is quiet and dark, but comfortable nonetheless. Bucky is relieved to be home.

“The cuts on your face, they’re not too bad.” You mutter quietly and your quiet voice sends shivers down Bucky’s spine. However, the tone in your voice makes him feel slightly uneasy.

“Serum.” He reminds you, his stare on you softening.

“Remove your arm.” You order, already starting to do it for him. He complies and the sight of his ripped shirt, stained with blood and a deep cut ripping through his abdomen doesn’t faze you too much. You’ve seen worse.

You grab your scissors and cut open his shirt, once again ignoring Bucky’s eyes on you and the close proximity. Sucking in some air at the sight of his naked chest, you start cleaning the cut and closing it with some medical zip ties before running your palms over his torso carefully and gently pressing into his stomach.

“Now is not the time to feel me up.” Bucky comments with a weak smirk, undoubtedly to ease the tension, and you roll your eyes.

“Checking for internal bleeding, Asshole.” You retort and pull away, “Unfortunately, you seem fine.”

You move to push yourself off the couch, but a metal hand around your wrist stops you. Whipping your head around, you watch your roommate still sat on the couch, looking much better than before but still with that goddamn stare on you.

“You’ve been crying.” It’s more of a statement.

Heartbeat picking up, you move to pull your wrist from his clasp, but you’re unsuccessful. His eyes travel over your face and you shrink under his stare, nothing there now to distract you. Bucky’s brows furrow as he examines your face in better lighting now, his grip tightening around your wrist.

Never have you been someone that gets too emotional and you’re lucky it’s not too visible when you’ve been crying. You’re good at your job and sure, you feel empathy, but not a lot of things manage to penetrate your hard exterior. Not many things really reached your heart. You wouldn’t be able to do your job properly if they did.

After a few chaotic shifts however, the sensitive cases hit a little harder and today was an especially tough one. You ran for the staff toilet and broke down completely, and again when you got home. You are private about your emotions and people usually leave you alone when it comes to these things, so having Bucky confront you so bluntly hits you a little too hard.

You grit your teeth and purse your lips to stop them from trembling, your throat instantly blocking with suffocating pain as he triggers your earlier misery. His grip on your wrist loosens before he tugs you back onto the couch. Too weak to fight him, you sit down next to him, focusing all your attention on trying not to cry as you stare ahead of you.

Your head is pounding and the silence coming from the man next to you is allowing way too much space for your sadness. It’s when Bucky’s hand slips down from your wrist, his metal fingers lacing with yours and squeezing softly, that you let out a broken whimper.

Bucky’s chest hurts more than it has the entire night hearing the gut wrenching sound come from your lips and he grits his teeth harshly. Ignoring his own pains since they’re subsiding slowly, he moves you to turn and face him.

When the streetlights reflect on the tears balancing on your waterline, he lets out a defeated sigh and grabs you by your waist, lifting you onto his lap with a little too much ease.

Sitting sideways in his lap, his metal hand moves to rest over your thigh as his right hand gently cradles your head. Feeling like you’re about to split apart and flood the apartment with your tears, you let him lean back and pull you with him, your head resting on his chest.

“Shh…” Bucky whispers and his gentle fingers massage your scalp soothingly. This is when you allow your overwhelming pain to wash over you and you break. Sobs whacking your body and tears leaking onto Bucky’s skin, you cry and cry until you’ve exhausted yourself.

A little while ago, Bucky had wished for you to be vulnerable around him, for something to happen that would make him feel like he isn’t the only one who is messed up. Wished for you to break your tough composure.

But he hates it. He wants to punch himself for ever wishing something so horrible, because seeing someone like you -someone so strong and kind- collapse like this makes him feel completely powerless. A feeling he told himself he never wants to have ever again.

Moving his arms around your frame, Bucky lifts you up as he stands from the sofa, easily ignoring the pain in his torso now that you’re attached to it. He walks over to your room and gently lays you down on your bed before climbing in himself and attaching himself to your back. He snakes his arm under your head, making your head rest on his bicep as he wraps his metal arm around your waist. Still hearing your sniffles, he buries his nose in your hair, pressing kisses to your head.

“What happened?” He whispers, his tone giving off that he’s not forcing you to talk.

You swallow hard and bite your lip. Your hand snakes over his metal arm and you scoot back further to bury yourself in him, Bucky responding by tightening his hold on you like a protective cocoon.

“Lost a young patient today and she had no one. There was no one there.” You choke out the bare minimum of the complicated case, trying to stop a third wave of tears from coming.

Bucky’s heart aches at that, understanding exactly why that devastates you. There was a time, not too long ago, where Bucky could have been that patient. Where he could die and no one would show up. He could only wish to have a nurse like you to be there and care for him.

That thought triggers a neediness and desperation Bucky hasn’t felt in a long time and he pulls you impossibly close, burying his face in your neck and breathing in your scent.

“She had you.” He mumbles and pushes a soft, warm kiss to your neck.

You squeeze your eyes shut and let yourself melt into Bucky’s hold, his entire front attached to your back and the arm under your head closing around you tightly with no intention to let go. You let out a shaky sigh, exhaustion spreading through your body.

“It’s okay. Sleep. I’m here.” Bucky’s low voice rumbles against the shell of your ear.

“You’re here.” You whisper.

“I’m right here.”

…

When you wake up, you feel reborn.

You must have turned around in your sleep, because you are laying on Bucky’s naked chest, heat radiating from his skin. Gently, you run your fingers over his skin, listening to his soft snores as you allow yourself to wake up.

Bright, yellow light is pouring through your curtains, as a start of another Indian summer day. Orange leaves poke against your window and the rumbling from the streets indicate that the work day has started already.

Looking up, you take a peek at the sleeping man’s face. Eyebrows finally relaxed and lips full, it’s easy for you to ignore the light bruising that’s still on his face. His arm is still tightly wrapped around you and you ignore the flutters in your stomach at the gesture. Your growling stomach is the only thing that stops you from laying on his body all day. You quietly climb out of bed, containing a smile when you watch his usual frown reappear on his features.

Having put on some quiet music, you roam around the kitchen to make the two of you some breakfast. Both of you have the day off, so nothing is stopping you from going all out. Eggs, bacon, grilled cheese, fruits. Slaving away in the kitchen, you barely notice Bucky shuffling out of your bedroom.

When you turn around to fill up your plates with food, you almost drop the hot pan filled with scrambled eggs when you spot Bucky on one of the stools.

“Bucky, Jesus!”

“Just Bucky is fine.” He teases with a dopey smile, his face puffy from sleep. You have to actively stop yourself from letting out a content sigh at the sight of him.

So you roll your eyes and finish up breakfast.

Yesterday was a weak moment for you, but you forced yourself to be as accepting to yourself as you are to your patients -as you are to Bucky. In the end, it is nice to know that you have a wonderful roommate to come home to when everything gets a little too much.

As much as the sight of you crying devastated Bucky, he was glad he was able to be there for you. After thinking for a while with you in his arms, he realised he wasn’t wishing for you to break down this whole time. He was wishing to be there when you inevitably did. After you were there for him with his nightmares, he just wants to be there for you.

Bucky digs into his breakfast hungrily, humming at the food. You had assumed he would be starving after the past couple of days and not exactly getting the chance to refuel when he got home last night. You smile and dig into your own food to stop your growling stomach.

“How do you feel?” Bucky asks suddenly with his mouth full.

You stay quiet for a moment before giving him a genuine smile. “Much better.” You pause, “Thank you, Bucky.”

He gives you a boyish grin and nods before continuing to inhale his breakfast.

…

The morning sun quickly vanished and was replaced by heavy rainfall, making you feel trapped in your apartment with Bucky. But in a good way.

Scrolling through Netflix as Bucky takes a shower, you look for a good movie to watch after you and him agreed to just hang out and watch movies all day. But looking for the right movie to watch is harder than it seems when you’re planning to hang out with your ex-assassin roommate who holds you when you cry and occasionally almost makes you orgasm.

Trying to avoid thinking about last night, your memory serves you further back to the night with your friends. You remember being too flushed to confront him about it and the next day, both of you had gone back to pretending nothing happened. He hasn’t made any move towards you since and to you, that’s another confirmation that he uses you as an instrument to continue his terrible coping mechanism. Sex.

You chew your lip as an intrusive idea penetrates your thoughts and heat instantly pulses between your legs. Part of you wonders if it’s good coping, if it will work for you. Granted, you feel much better than yesterday, but it can’t hurt to try right? Besides, you silently promised him payback.

And you know what they say… payback is a fucking bitch.

A devious smile creeps onto your face and your heart starts thumping in your chest when the shower faucet stops running, telling you Bucky has finished his shower. You get up from the couch cushions and pad your way over to the bathroom on your bare feet, biting your lip when you see the door is unlocked.

You take a deep breath to gather your courage. Doing this properly requires a lot of confidence and you are going to have to fake it to make it. Opening the bathroom door quietly and stepping into the relatively large bathroom, you’re surprised to see Bucky hasn’t noticed you come in.

The air is warm and foggy, Bucky’s masculine scent wafting through the air. You almost shiver at your excitement, the pulse between your legs demanding when you see his naked back. Bulging muscles stretch from his shoulders down to his ass. Thick thighs keep him upright, shoulders and arm flexing deliciously as he dries his hair with his towel. Water drips down his tanned skin and drops sit on the glistening metal of his arm. You lick your lips, because you have to lick something.

Carefully, you take three steps forward, your nose almost touching him when Bucky suddenly freezes. Neither of you were making any sounds, but the silence you hear now is deafening. You raise your hands and gently trail your fingers over the muscles on his back, smiling when goosebumps rise over his skin.

Curling your fingers, your nails lightly scratch his skin and his muscles roll under your touch. Focused on the movements of his body, you lean forward and press your warm mouth to his skin. Bucky lets out a shaky sigh and it urges you to do what you wanted to do from the moment you saw him like this. You dart out your tongue and lick off some of the waterdrops.

Bucky is surprised the water hasn’t evaporated from the heat he emits from this and he lets out a deep groan, that action enough to rush all the blood from his head down to his cock. He instantly turns around, drops the towel and grabs your shoulders tightly, looking down at you.

His jaw drops at the look in your eyes. They’re so dark, so glassy, so… full of lust. He swallow hard, his grip on your shoulders tightening slightly as he takes in the state you’re in.

You lick your lips as you look up at him, giving him a cheeky smirk when you see the look on his face. His easing grip allows you to take one step closer and you give him one more look before dipping down and pressing your lips to his chest, repeating your action from before with your tongue and glancing down to see his cock twitch.

“Hmm…” You hum and he grips the top of the glass shower wall with his metal hand as his other hand goes to your head. He just loves the feeling of your hair between his flesh fingers and the power he feels when he pulls. Something tells him he doesn’t get to feel the power right now.

Your mouth travels lower and lower, Bucky’s gaze following you obediently when you get on your knees. Tracing your tongue over his v while you look up at him nearly ends him and this is when he grasps your hair tightly and yanks your head back.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He growls, pain straining through his cock when he sees your jaw hang slack at his pull.

“Taste of your own medicine, Buck.” You answer and Bucky’s jaw clenches tightly “Don’t worry. Your friends aren’t here so I might let you come.”

Bucky stays quiet, his eyes traveling over your face as he contemplates to take the punishment, or… Well, of course he’ll take it. It’s you.

You smile brightly when his grip loosens and your palms slide up his thighs as you lean in, flattening your tongue against the base of his length and dragging it up slowly, only to pull away again. Bucky drops his head back to his neck and he lets out a shaky breath. He quickly looks down again, not wanting to miss a thing of you being on your knees for him.

You repeat your actions, dragging your tongue up against the thick vein of his shaft before wrapping your wet lips around the head and sucking. Your tongue traces the underside of his tip as you suck eagerly. When his thighs clench under your touch, you decide to throw him off and take him in completely, hollowing your cheeks.

He lets out an animalistic growl at the unexpected sensation and scrunches your hair in his fist, making your eyes roll back at the feeling. You wrap one hand around his base and squeeze him, your mouth working on him ardently as you do everything to pull more sounds from his beautiful lips. Taking him in as far as you can, you feel the strong man weaken at your devious lips.

You moan around him and the vibrations make him almost buckle over, his metal hand cracking the glass wall from the force of his grip. Raising your eyes, you look up at the flustered soldier, his chest heaving and glistening with water as he pants and grunts.

Bucky looks down at you and moves his hand to stroke his thumb over your cheek as your eyes lock in on each other. He drawls out your name the way you love so much and you hollow your cheeks again. His cheeks flush and his lips purse in restraint at the sight. Your name rolls off his lips a few times like a prayer and you hum in appreciation at the sound.

“Good girl. Good fucking girl.” He tugs on your hair again to keeps your eyes locked with him as he praises you. His voice is so deep, so rough, you barely recognise it.

You smile at him, the praise sending a gush of wetness between your legs. You wouldn’t be surprised if you were dripping down your thighs right now.

His cock twitches in your mouth and you suck at his tip while your thumb runs over the throbbing vein. Your other hand kneads at his balls and you feel his body stutter. His hips twitch forward slightly, signalling he’s close. When his breath hitches and the hand in your hair flies to the wall to support him, you know for a fact that he is seconds away.

So naturally, you take your mouth off him and stand to your feet. You press a wet kiss to his lips before walking out.

Bucky is so flustered, so completely wrecked, it takes him a few seconds to catch on. Before you know it, you have a half-wet, naked man storming towards you with eyes like fury. You’re pretty sure steam is spewing from his ears as he looks at you.

“What the fuck.” He spits through gritted teeth.

You give him a sweet smile.

“You seem a little riled up, darling.” Your voice sends his blood to run cold before you close your bedroom door in his face.

…

“How the fuck are you in a worse mood?!” Dr. Raynor asks him incredulously.

Bucky scoffs “Don’t ask.”

“I’m gonna.”

He rolls his eyes at her and crosses his arms, pouting like a child once again as his therapist waits impatiently for him to explain how on earth he came back even grumpier than before.

“Can I give you a hypothetical?” He suddenly asks and she nods slowly, curious to where this is going to lead them. Bucky stays quiet for a second, pondering over his next words before speaking up “What if I had sex with my roommate?”

“JAMES!”

“It’s a hypothetical!” He yells back, his hands going up in defence.

“Did you?”

“No?” Bucky questions “Sorta… I mean, no.”

“Bucky…”

“I don’t know what to tell you, doc.” He shrugs indifferently while Raynor looks at him with shock.

“I’m very tempted to ask you never to tell me anything ever again.” She tells him dryly, sitting back in her chair with a sigh and raising her hand to pinch the bridge of her nose.

“I’d be okay with that.”

“Shut up.”

NEXT PART

#bucky barnes x nurse!reader #bucky barnes x reader smut #bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #marvel smut #bucky barnes oneshot #oneshot #series #smut #fluff #im genuinely so nervous to post now bc u guys seem so excited #SORRY FOR THE TENSION #i hope you guys like it #pls pls tell me what u think bc it make sme the happiest person ! #hope i did the tagging right oops #much love #writing

[mirrorforevers]

graham/reader • and i love him

hmmmmmm so

i wrote a lil smutty n angsty gra/fem!reader fic set in the late 90s and im kinda proud of it ‼️

👉🏼 👈🏼 

this is my first work for the blur fandom and im Nervous bc i haven’t been writing for a while and english is not my first language but hope u guys enjoy it anyway - if you enjoy it enough i’ll post it on ao3 too, aight? also this hasn’t been beta’ed by anyone so yeah. also feel free to send me a message if u want to beta it in case you wanna see it there. aaaaaaaaa

tw: alcoholism

You haven't been sleeping very well these days.

Any noise, no matter how insignificant, would wake you up. When there weren't noises, there were nightmares that you were losing him - those were the worst nights. Many times you woke up crying because everything was so real, and you couldn't have peace even in your moment of rest.

Sometimes it was difficult to love him.

The memories of the long lazy days you spent watching TV, painting each other's backs and tasting all sorts of bizarre treats he brought from the different countries he travelled to with his band were gradually replaced by memories of corrosive words exchanged between the two of you and moments where either you or he ended up crying in each other's arms - out of shame, out of despair, out of frustration. But that didn't mean that you were loving him any less, just that your individual tribulations sometimes got too heavy even to share.

You knew he was going through a very difficult time, but he didn't open up to you very much about it and it frustrated you on a level that you could barely describe. Being in a serious relationship was something so new to you, and it helped you so much in your bad times, and you just couldn't understand why he didn't trust you like you trusted him. "It's not that I don't trust you, you're the most important person in the world to me," he'd typically say. "It's such a terrible feeling, and I just want it to go away. I don't even like to talk about it."

This is the same thing he says to you with teary eyes as the hot water in the shower wets your skin and his. For the third time that week, you had to help him, without even having the opportunity to take your own clothes off, to take off his clothes that smelled unbearably of alcohol and sweat and to take a shower. You no longer had the strength to argue or lecture him, and your silence of resignation somehow seemed to hurt him even more. He tried to bring up other subjects and remind you of good things, and your throat seemed to close more and more. Before your eyes could also fill with tears, you just left a small, shaky "Gra, please... let's just get this over with." escape from your lips. He got the message, maybe. And he agreed to have his hair washed in silence.

After you help him dry off and choose clean underwear, sleep got the best of him and then it was your turn to take a shower and try to sleep. You swore he was asleep a long time ago, when, just before you fell asleep, you heard an almost whispered, fragile "I love you" coming from the other side of the bed. It somehow hurt you more than it should - it's been so long since you've wanted to hear it from the man you truly know - a sober Graham, a little unsure of himself but a guy with such a full and gentle heart. You knew that his problem with drinking was not just the search for overcoming that insecurity, but a constant attempt to escape from the reality that, years before, he thought he wanted to be part of. And as for that, there was not much for you to do. But you still missed it so much in another context, in what now seems to be an eternity ago.

By some miracle, you did not wake up in the middle of the night due to some noise caused by Graham or due to some nightmare, but only in the morning thanks to the sunlight illuminating your face. But Graham was no longer on your side, and you closed your eyes, sighing. Another long day without him among thousands of rehearsals and concerts and meetings and photoshoots he had to attend, which anticipated yet another long night of ill-resolved fights.

"I'm terribly sorry for fucking up again." And then you opened your eyes. There he was, now with a shirt over the underwear you chose for him, his voice as low as ever. Without his glasses.

Finally, the Graham you knew. Your eyes light up and you move to get up from the comfortable bed you shared when he interrupts you. "No, stay right there."

"I've been missing you." You say with an almost whiny voice, a faint but genuine smile taking over your expressions. "Don't you have *anything* to do today?" You ask, as he pulls out a camera to photograph you in your current position - messy hair, while wearing only his t-shirt. You don't hide from the clicks. After being satisfied with the result, he positions himself between your legs, and you spend a few minutes in silence in that position, face to face, just reading each other's expressions so closely.

It was very difficult not to love the beautiful boy in front of you.

"I do." And with that, he places a very soft and loving kiss on your lips, which slowly incorporates the latent desire burning on both of you. It's so good not to taste the alcohol, just the mouthwash with the touch of a cigarette that he just smoked. He only stops after a few more long pecks, calmly brushing away some of the strands of hair off your face, "I'm sorry for being such a cunt. Things are being very difficult for me lately."

You look away from him so you don't cry. This subject really breaks your heart. "Things are very difficult for me too."

He calmly brings your face up to look at him again. "They don't have to be. I don't want to make you go through this. I swear I will try to get help."

This is not the first time he has said this. But you pretend to believe him. And this time, you start the kiss, a little more fervently than before. Perhaps this is a silent agreement between you two. You feel something slowly grow beneath you, and you move against the feeling, making you both gasp softly in the middle of the kiss. The lips part, and then he looks into your eyes deeply again, both foreheads touching - as he silently asks you for permission to make it up to you. You just nod between heavy shared breaths. He goes to kiss you intensely, albeit very lovingly, while slowly lowering his hand to your clit, where he begins a slow circular movement. You close your eyes, and he pleads, quietly – “Keep looking at me, love”.

Gradually, you start to grind harder against his talented fingers, and when he realizes that your body is prepared enough (and quickly expresses it to you - "fuck, you really missed me", making your cheeks burn), he inserts two fingers into you, while insisting on the circular movements that delighted you so much. You're having goosebumps and you slowly feel that delicious wave of heat build up in you as he continues with his movements. You surprise him by kissing his neck slowly between timid but sincere moans that gradually escape from you. His voice trembles with arousal. "This is all about you, love. But that's quite nice." When he feels your body stiffen, and hears your moans become more urgent, he stops his movements and gives you a kiss on the cheek that borders on mockery, giving a small laugh with your grunt of protest. He mutters a small "Be patient baby, please. Come on my mouth instead.". Graham's hoarse voice in your ear almost kills you. He raises the hand that was stimulating you in an absurd way seconds before to lift and remove your shirt, basking in the sight of your breasts - hands sliding down your sides, he lifts your chest to his mouth, which makes you happy but it does not meet 100% of your needs. He knows that. And he wants to take his sweet time while his talented tongue takes turns between each of your breasts for a while, eliciting smaller moans from you but still giving you so much pleasure.

Honestly, what a view. His big brown eyes, when not closed due to his determination and focus on making you feel good, sometimes fixes on yours and the cloud of attraction between you two almost becomes tangible. Then, he quickly lifts up to give your mouth a sensuous kiss while his hand then makes its way down your body, taking a detour at your already sensible breasts to grab one and give it a slow squeeze. "You're so fucking beautiful. I love you." His pure adoration for you drips from his voice, and you feel like you're about to burst from how much in love and horny you are.

"I love you too."

He gives you that goddamn smile that melts you every time before he lowers himself again, this time placing his head between your thighs while snaking his arms above them, trapping you in what is about to be a hell of a great time. He begins on an exploratory pace, then gradually starts eating you out with passion, though not forgetting to be gentle enough so he doesn't hurt you or seems inexperienced. That he *really* isn't.

He moans deliciously on your clit the moment your grip on his hair tightens - he loves it when you're rougher with him, a sub at heart, really, though he's undoubtedly getting better at dealing with your more submissive side lately. Your body is reacting in the prettiest ways, and he recognizes it's the time for his fingers to be inside of you again. You have to contain yourself not to wake up your neighbors with the sound of your excitement, and you bite your finger. You can't help but buck your hips in response to the stimulation. “Gra–God. I--I need to--”

“Keep still, darling. I know what you need,” His eyes are gleaming with mischief when one of his hands moves to rest on your waist so he can hold you in place. It's too much, and when he hears your quiet pleas and sees your back arching and the frozen expression of pure pleasure in your face, he intensifies his movements and you freeze - your legs twitch and he lets you ride your orgasm freely on his gorgeous, hungry mouth.

You looked down to see his chin was resting on your stomach as he gazed up at you with *that* infatuated look that suited him so well along with the cheekiest smile - he keeps his thoughts to himself before his suggestion makes your satisfied smile grow even wider: "Let's spend the day together. I still feel like I owe a lot to you.".

#graham coxon #alex james #damon albarn #dave rowntree #blur #britpop #smut #imagine #reader insert #graham coxon x reader #graham x reader #y/n #angst

[zepdeans]

this is highkey like a month late (i mean wbk im a chronic scatterbrain procrastinator) and she’s thicccc but without further ado. my skam s4 thoughts.

I first just want to say a couple things: im not a muslim woc so my thoughts on s4 don’t hold as much value as those of a muslim, woc, or a muslim woc. I also don’t know to what degree sana’s representation was true to real life. I made an effort to look for posts from muslim woc on sana’s season but to no real avail, especially given it’s been two years since skam ended and a lot of blogs have deactivated, changed urls, or posts have become buried :( [if you know of any good posts regarding sana’s season please lmk!]. from what I can recall in 2017, there were mixed opinions on s4 with most being upset (or at least disappointed) with the ultimate execution of sana’s storyline and I agree w that. while s4 means so much to me and has a really special place in my heart, I do 100% acknowledge its flaws. ok!!!!!! lets get into it😤

ep1 -as much as I wished isak stayed in kollektivet I’m glad he and even had a rlly sweet happy time this entire season. also evak making their friends move all their furniture while they whisper romantic shit to each other and makeout? peak comedy -you fuckin wish!!! -sana is the one to say “of course you should tell noora about william”.. she Knew and still takes the fall for it :( -this opening clip is such a jarring shift into sana’s pov!! e.g. while easy to overlook in previous seasons, sana’s exclusion from the girls is glaringly obvious once we’re looking through her eyes -adding onto that! sana is the friend who notices everyone else- she’s so observant, which hurts even more when you notice her friends don’t do the same (except mayhaps chris- in my heart of hearts I know chris is also the friend who notices and goes unnoticed, but unfortunately we don’t get enough of her and sana’s relationship this season to fully see that) -yousef and the balloon squad’s entrance.... ICONIC! also I cant believe for 2 seasons they presented those dickbag nissen 97s as the be all end all of hot amazing boys when the bakka third years were RIGHT THERE like,, the penetrators vs. balloon squad + even? no contest ma’am -also! it’s so interesting that we literally had no idea sana had a brother, or that yousef etc existed until now? it’s as if she has a whole private world at home, separate from her friends and nissen (and I think a theme of this season is those two worlds merging) -im obsessed w the yousana train scene but yousef being the only one who notices sana standing off to the side? ;-; -fy faen is such a stunning clip oh my god. when sana leaves to pray? possibly my favourite skam scene ever. it’s exquisite.  -sana is so cute and awkward squeezing thru the crowd shsdhgfhshdf I LOVE her love her -the last shot on yousef and noora... oh my GOD oh my god bc like. being that friend who never ever tells your real feelings or your crushes or is vulnerable with your friends?? and then having to listen to them talk about how good your crush would be with someone else (especially one of ur friends) while ur sitting there silently dying inside? and you don’t say anything since you can’t be vulnerable with your friends and u don’t think u stand a chance anyways so. (in the words of s3 noora. I think sana struck a nerve with the emotional unavailability! abbey r u ok) -this episode is a masterpiece and did such a phenomenal job of both introducing us to sana’s perspective while also touching on a multitude of her struggles AND establishing the themes of the season. plus the cinematography, editing, soundtrack and aesthetic...... o baby. (case in point I deadass just rewatched it after writing this)

ep2 -every shot of sana praying is beautiful (and beautifully edited!!) -sana’s room is usually messy... not smart enough to fully analyze this but I’m sure it means something  -an interesting contrast of what’s expected of her vs. of elias- I can’t speak for muslim families, but I know even in non-muslim families girls are always held to suchhh a higher standard (source: I have 2 brothers rip) -”if you find immaturity charming” hilarious bc sana actually does in fact find immaturity charming  -what’s interesting is how noora comes across in sana’s POV- kinda obnoxious, kinda ignorant, seemingly perfect (compared to how noora is portrayed in eva’s season, for example) -even is one of those ppl who uses the bill gates argument on why dropping out of school makes u richer sdfhfsjskfjfsd -sana staring down the pepsi max squad. fuck em up. -vilde adding magnus to the groupchat jfkjsjfdjfsfsdkj -isak missing eskild :’) sidenote I fucking live for isak and sana’s chats this season. they’re literally my lifeblood like.... 

ep3 -the kiss me scene god I go FERAL -“you need to pull it towards you, not push it away. okay?” yall mind if i SCREAM!! YOUSEF!!!!!!!!!! -there rlly is something about seeing sana, who in everyone else’s POV comes off as cold and harsh and stoic, just absolutely meltinggg when she talks w yousef like she doesn’t stop smiling she’s so sweet!!!! ah🥰 and yousef is 100% that guy who ppl tell “your gf is so intimidating and ruthless bro” and he’s like are y’all talking about sana??????? my baby?? my fuckin cinnamon apple????? -yousef’s lil smile watching sana peel carrots. 911 it’s me again -vilde and sana’s relationship has a really interesting dynamic bc like.. vilde says ignorant shit to sana while also genuinely looking up to her. and sana is probably the harshest to vilde within the group but it’s because she actually values their friendship a lot  -IM HURT BECAUSE YOU NEVER REPLIED TO MY MEME -sana pulling 2yr old receipts off the top of her head to defend vilde. god I stan -sana doin research taking notes..... shameful she isn’t canonically a virgo (honestly her and isak both but like-) -she’s so soft and smiley w her mamma awh... “of course he likes you, who doesn’t like you?” her mamma only knows the real, gentle, beautiful loving sana oh im CRY -even is so kind and loving and thoughtful yall mind if i....... -”you can’t escape the internet girl” foreshadowing mayhaps?

ep4 -david and ulrikke together are fucking hilarious -noora’s “you’re lucky you don’t have to think about this stuff, heartbreak and that” :/ it’s not just vilde who says ignorant things to sana! -that being said sana and noora are cute asf in the exper5 scene.. dorky noora rise (omg josefine and her yogurt in the bloopers too sjhfkjdf) -I HANDLE BALLS BETTER THAN YOU -the yousana scene is sooo gorgeous whew...... -I always cry a lil bit (ok a lot) when yousef brings up even. and sana knew too. even sweetie ily :( -sana talking about her religion is beautiful. it’s so lovely to learn about how she thinks and sees the world. -yousef’s smile watching sana leave like ur kidding right....... -“flawless since 99″ is so cringey. it’s so cringeyyy -sana uses “smh” I knew we were soulmates

ep5 -eavesdropping on ur parent/brother’s argument is peak sibling culture -when ur always paranoid but ur always right..... -sana’s green jumpsuit sign me up babey -I really really really love elias and sana’s conversation -u dont even realize how tiny sana is until she’s standing next to isak and even -not finding out why yousef avoided the fight and why he kissed noora will haunt me forever (could we not have expanded more on that instead of noorhelm.......) -the parallel of sana washing isak’s blood off her hands vs. her washing her hands during maghrib in episode 1. gotta sit down. -vilde gossiping to the pepsimax girls stings SO bad it’s just such a betrayal?:( -“the other girls seem cool, especially noora! she’s so pretty!” ok much to unpack here but: sana again comparing herself to noora (who she sees as /perfect/)... sana being written off despite putting so much effort and passion into the russ bus while noora, who has done literally nothing and at best is indifferent to russ, is the one they like the most. disgusteng -love will tear us apart.. bitch..... -sana abt to cry god I can’t -if sana is anything like me (I mean I think she is but jkjjkhsdfhfsd). looking stupid is the absolute worst so like, her sending out emails abt being bus boss when she was actually being lied to? being played? and her being “paranoid” about sara being shady, but deciding hey maybe im just being crazy? except she wasn’t she was right and she Knew!! and she’s probably thinking how dumb it was for her to get her hopes up, everything always ends badly anyways and no one actually likes her :((((((( -dont rlly know what my feelings are on the fight. im not against it bc isak does have a temper but his apparent motive always seemed weak to me?? and god I feel so bad for even

ep6 -forgot about sana getting bullied in middle school yall mind if I sob?? -sana lying and getting defensive bc it’s hard to be vulnerable, or because she hates looking stupid? or both?:( -isak looking up dandelions in his textbook just bc even put one behind his ear. I HATE this man -sana’s dad asking if she had a bad day aw :( -all the boys (and sana) wearing black but yousef wearing white.... what does it mean.............. -the carrots are back goddammit -radio station playing during this scene: “if I have to choose between the just non-muslim and the unjust muslim, without any doubt I would choose the non-muslim who is just” -ISAK’S NOSE SFFJDFJFSDKJSDF -sana’s text about chris I’m going to bawl my eyes out.           “yeah! looking forward (to going to nissen) but a bit worried. don’t know               anyone else starting there.”           (J: new friends?) “yes, at least one of them. I have german with her (chris)           and she’s very cool!” -the contrast of how blunt sana came off when we’re first introduced to her vs. how she was really just excited to make a new friend bc she was scared no one would like her :( especially knowing her past with bullying and how nervous she was to start at nissen? chris baby I LOVE YOU thank u ;-; -also sana keeping 2yr old conversations on her phone... same -sana is honestly too smart and scheming and overthinking for her own good. she has these elaborate plans that more-or-less always get ruined by her being more kind than she gives herself credit for (e.g. wanting to protect vilde in s1, clearing isak’s name in s4) -everyone in skam texts back so fast smh -chris calling sana “sonic”...... a moment please -I cannot watch the sana/evak apartment scene without thinking of the bloopers and losing it lmfaoooo.. “this is where we live. just come in” -ik it’s based off fanart but there is little I hate more than their matching outfits  -“remember you’re both geniuses!” 🥺even  -once again isak studying is uhhhh me - “you’re a good person” yall i love isak i really do. he puts his foot in his mouth pretty often and doesn’t have a great brain-to-mouth filter and he can be awkward and rambly and blunt and unsure of what to say in emotional situations but also? he’s so genuine. it’s just his honest thoughts and he says it bc he cares about sana and knows she needs to hear it!! -ᶠᵃᵉⁿ ᵉᵛᵉⁿ -sana’s inner turmoil.. thank u iman for inventing acting (ik I haven’t mentioned it much yet but god iman is SUCH a phenomenal actor I owe her my life) -LETS GO BITCHES

ep7 -sana crying silently in her room breaks my fucking heart (IMAN!!!!)  -idk how I feel about the instagram plot but sana watching as her plan falls into place and then storming up to sara... pretty bada$$ -“it’s creepy it was published but it’s more creepy we have a bus boss who talks shit about everyone” THANK YOU vilde -i love s4 isak thanks -sana and jamilla’s chat aw :~) -how awkward do yall think the walk to the bench was lmfao -what sana tells isak is SO powerful and I love it a lot -isak does actually make a good point- the other girls are like that too.  -unfortunately I have been in situations isak describes, where you want to learn more about your friend’s culture or religion because you care about them and you’re genuinely interested, but you don’t know what questions are okay to ask and you don’t want to sound rude or ignorant, so you ultimately end up asking no questions at all. but I hate that the responsibility is put on sana to constantly educate people bc I cannot imagine how exhausting that must be [[[ok so. I know there are VERY mixed opinions on the bench scene but here’s my dumbass two cents. 1- I genuinely think isak was trying to make sana feel better by attempting to relate to her and pass on advice that really helped him. however, I don’t think isak realized what sana eventually told him- that her experience wearing the hijab is a lot different than isak’s experience as a gay man. do I agree with everything isak said? nooo. do I understand why he said it? yeah. 2- it was not isak’s place to tell sana norwegians aren’t racist, or not to look for racism in questions. I think there’s some truth to ppl often just being ignorant, and he does add that there are probably a lot of racist people in Norway, but yeah. not great. 3- in conclusion I think while isak shared some meaningful advice w sana, he put his foot in his mouth too and said some stupid shit. im not trying to defend that. I will add, though: a. we actually do see some growth on isak’s part. when he and even are yelled at on the street, that’s the moment it clicks for him that oh shit, this is what sana was talking about. this is what she has to experience? and that’s why he texts noora, “in the speech for sana, you have to include how insanely strong she is. I don’t think many people understand how much bullshit she has to take” and b. isak’s (bad) advice of “not looking for the racism in things” is ultimately contrasted by yousef (a moc who lived most of his life as a muslim) suggesting instead to show people what islam really is. and that’s so much more meaningful. I think the root of a lot of the issues isak brought up- i.e. ignorance- is a general lack of education, representation, or effort by non-muslim people to seek out information themselves. so sana leading by example and showing what it means to her to be muslim is so much more powerful.]]] -𝒃𝒂𝒎!  -BEST BUDS 🥺

ep8 -haper du har plass weaving in and out of this episode until the chorus finally breaks when the los losers van shows up...... miss julie 😭 -oh my god the pictures. im a fucking MESS bc they’re not only significant to the scene and to sana but also like,, as part of our goodbye to the girls?? -the balloon squad and even :( while the timeline of them reconciling within just this week is kinda wack, seeing even back with his friends looking so happy makes my heart uwu so i’ll allow it just this once -eva’s message to vilde about her and magnus being able to trust each other w/o reading their texts... growth or irony -chris is such a phenomenal friend (and this is why I wanted more of her in s4!!) -sana’s phonecall to the girls breaks my fucking heart bc like. right off the bat she’s finally being vulnerable with them?? telling them about her fears and insecurities and struggles? typing this im gonna start crying lol but god I love her so much. she’s so brave and she put all that on the line bc all she really cares about are her friends, she loves them SO much even if (she thinks) they don’t love her back -lowkey sobbed so hard during the haper du har plass clip I almost threw up and it gave me a headache :)  -anyways this is one of my favourite skam clips and god just. the moment you hear the girls calling for sana??? I LOSE it. when sana just starts BEAMING omg🤧 the girls love sana and support her and if you fuck with sana you fuck with us!!!!!! god. cannot articulate how dear to my heart this scene is. -haper du har plass feels like the end of the episode and the party clip is kinda just tacked on but I love how happy everyone is!! they’re all drinking champagne (who taught isak how to hold things) and dancing and smilingggg 💛 -yousana rise!!!!!!!!  -ok don’t get me wrong I hate william for crashing the party but their entrance slow-mo kinda slaps.... also sana popping up in between noorhelm SENDS me

ep9 -this is the point in the season where the amount of time dedicated to noorhelm is beyond beyond beyond significantly damaging to the story. this is sana’s last episode!! instead of having them makeout in front of william’s car for 20 minutes mayhaps we could’ve had a conversation between the girls and sana, or with her brother (if they had continued the elias alcoholism plotline rip), or maybe even with jamilla or her mamma? like I don’t care at ALL about noora or william. give me anything else. ple a s e -what makes skam scenes so brilliant is their quiet moments!! julie let the scene breathe. not everything needs a tacky song playing over top. -I’ve said this abt like twenty clips now but MAGHRIB. oh my GOD. an absolute masterpiece and definitely tied for my all time favourite skam clip. can’t rlly put into words how stunning it is. & I love sana and yousef’s conversation so much. -“of course I brought food! my name is yousef!” mr. acar you’re the only man I trust

ep10 -as much as my heart yearns for 10 sana episodes I think splitting up the last episode of skam into individual POV clips for different characters was brilliant and such a poignant way to say goodbye :( -okay don’t think about what sana could’ve written in her texts to everyone or ur heart will go sicko mode -I won’t write anything abt this ep since I’ve already written too much but like.. (elias should’ve gotten a clip instead of william. pchris can stay because his clip was funny but he’s on thin fuckin ice) -kjaere sana was such a beautiful way to say goodbye to skam. so yeah. bye skam. i miss you. 

overall ➔I’m not really sure why (possibly a lethal combination of my undying love for sana bakkoush, how much I relate to her, this but my ass was crying EVERY single episode of season 4...... F ➔I’m obsessed with s4′s aesthetic. imo the best editing, soundtrack and cinematography of any season!!!! julie is so talented at making each season feel distinct- to me, sana’s season is cool, vibrant colours (aka the late-night sunset aesthetic- gabie i hear u laughing shut up), crisp electronic/pop music and rap, ethereal city nights..... also sana has the best style of any skam character it had to be said ➔sana’s growth! seeing her open up and be honest and vulnerable with the girls during that phone call. sana sending all of her friends literally the sweetest messages of how much they mean to her and how much she values their relationship. sana being the (MUCH) bigger person and making amends with sara, ingrid etc. I love her so much :’((( ➔I’ve thought a lot about what I would change in season 4 and honestly? im a mf scatterbrain and have no real, structured ideas. my biggest issue is too much noora. dream s4 would be william staying in london and noora being happy on her own (but not rly on her own bc she has the girls and kollektivet!). as :/ as I am about the noora/yousef plotline, I’m not really sure what I’d do to replace the yousana conflict in ep5. maybe involving elias, or the balloon squad and even? related to that- in lieu of all the noora/noorhelm screentime, I would so much rather have a follow-up plot to elias’s drinking problem bc it was kinda just dropped? at the very least, the william clip should’ve been elias’s. I also would've killed for more one-on-one scenes with chris (even vilde or eva!), jamilla, even, members of the balloon squad... there are so many interesting stories that could’ve been explored instead of going down the noorhelm rabbithole again. furthermore, I feel like the social media plot was a bit... weak? again I’ve tried thinking of what I would’ve done instead (while also keeping the haper du har plass clip, y’all can pry that one from my cold dead hands) to little avail. what especially threw me about this plotline is that sana did this in s2 to jamilla, fucked up, and it bit her in the ass. I know that she gets irrational when angry but from a storytelling perspective, it seems repetitive. just.. I feel like there could’ve been a more powerful plot in which sana follows the same character arc. another thing I would’ve loved to see is beyond the los losers van, an apology from the girls to sana. or even just a conversation where they tell her “hey sana, we’re sorry for not paying attention and we’re sorry for being thoughtless/ignorant.” an apology from vilde about things she’s said in the past would’ve been <3. even a gesture! the girls order pizza again but this time it’s halal, or they make an effort to learn about sana’s religion and culture. I know it’s implied through the letter they write for sana, but a final standalone scene would’ve been so nice.  ➔i’ve noticed soo many remakes do this thing where they like.. water down shitty behaviour of their characters. which like- sure. I would love for everyone to be kind and thoughtful and not as horrible as they could be but also... I think that’s the point of skam? to show that people fuck up, but that doesn’t define them as a person. no one is perfect and no one can be thoughtful and considerate and kind all the time. and often these ‘problematic’ actions are integral to the story- e.g. elias saying stupid comments to isak (related to isak’s internalized homophobia and fear of coming out to his friends), the girl squad being ignorant about what sana can eat, etc. so..... your remake is not better because it erased every horrible action every character has done. (nuance.. where r u.........) ➔despite its flaws, I will say- the good moments of season 4? ineffable. I think we sometimes forget that julie literally wrote, directed, and I believe (?) assisted w editing and soundtrack too. i cant imagine doing all that under so much pressure, trying to bring so many storylines to a conclusion whilst simultaneously creating a goodbye-season to a show she put her life into the past two years. I’m so fucking appreciative of her. and you know what? all in all julie wrote some pretty damn beautiful episodes and scenes, and you can tell she loves this show just as much as we do. ➔and honestly this is maybe one reason I’m more wary of watching remake s4′s, bc like.. this season meant SO much bc it was the last season of skam. we knew it was the last season. the final episode is more or less a love letter, a goodbye to the show. whereas w some remakes (do i have to say whomst) its  like.. that love isnt there. it’s just another season. yknow? in conclusion I miss skam so much :(

ok whew if ur reading this ur a champion but also why did you just read 5k of me rambling about how much I love sana bakkoush?? 

#not one coherent or intelligent thing is said in the entirety of this post but enjoy #skam #blabbey #clownfest 2019

[haeroniel-doliet]

gah another 5 am post eh fellas

fuck i really wanna do ballet. i really rarely become obsessed (if ever) with anything, but for once i’m so so so so soso wanting to do ballet. so bad. i know i might hate it bc im fucing not musical at all, so not in shape, so not comfortable or etc. but at least im 18,(wait fuck 19 now)  and not 45 trying to get in it all stiff and stuck and i think based on all the sweet positivity to adult ballet starters beginners and sure i wont perform professionally but fuck man i dont think i need that. i just want that grace and flexibility and elegance and gah itd be fabulous. i mean even now im pretending to look for turn out and walk around the house like they do in point shoes and i try fix my posture tothe advice by a ballet dancer youtuber who ive been watching so much of. i just i really wanna do it. 

saddest fucking thing is guys, that i could’ve had the chance to go to the fucking royal ballets adult absolute beginner classes. in london. i could have. fuck. u wanna know what happened? i found out about it like a month or two ago and was fucking psyched bc its one of those things that just is too good to be true. the best company in uk?? w adult classes? while im in london?? yeah id have to miss a few weeks bc. whoops i gotta go back up to do my exams,but i couldve at least done a few weeks, come back and done a few last so i’d have had the best opportunity to give this a go in the best environment and then have a kindling to go off with to other available ballets. and not start with some barely managing person in a shitty studio thing. idk. sure so i tell my parents so fuckin excited bc look! its possible! but yeah its expensive, wouldve been abt 90 pound w me being a student and id have to miss 3/10 classes. but still! thin of it gah its making me so sad happy. sad bc guess its now sold out. of fuckin course it is. i told my mom and she just was uhmm ohh i dunno i dunno, oh its adults i could do it, and thinking that maybe getting her involved would mean i have a better chance of going, dont care much for her company but if shed take it as a bonding thing hell, i’ll probably do better than her in class and minor confidence boost as well as if they all others are old old i wont be alone. and she could pass over what they learned when im up in scotland. Guess that was a fuckin mistake. she got all nervous and self concious and put it off with a we’ll see we’ll see about it im thinking. and making it a whole thing like instead of me wanting to go so bad and offering for fun that shed join me, as if im trying to pressure her into doing it and would only go along to make her feel better. uh.... fucking wrong! im so mad actually. bc of course, no matter how often i mentioned it she wouldnt take it seriously to even consider booking me in! no no of course not we’ll see. and then i check before im coming back, dreading and being right that yep. theyre fucing sold out. of course they are its such a fanstastic opportunity! my only fucking opportunity! when ever again am i going to live in london with weeks free to go participate in that? when ever again? never. theyre moving out of london this summer and fuck. just doing some research and the scottish ballet is in fucking glasgow. yes i was supposed to get there if i hadnt been so shit with studying for my exams. (sure i wouldnt be doing archery and wouldnt have all the other wonderful things i now enjoy in aberdeen but fuck its frustrating) and ofc. aberdeen seems to have: one shady dance company that offers ballet fusion. not adult ballet classes. another shady school that practices at robert gordons that have no website nothing. no info how to sign up or if they have adult classes or when its so stupid and weird. maybe ill have to contact them directly idk. sure my uni has a what seems to be a thriving dance society that i have a glitched out membership for. (its 50 pound a year and i have cerrainly not paid that) and i guess they do ballet on the side. but again from a glance around, looks its only intermediate. not beginners. dont think theres that many uni age girls who just wanna start ballet now. 

so it looks bleary. even in finland, i cant understand body parts in finnish so that might just be frustrating if i could even find a place that offers it. not that i’ll have long at all in finland. ill be there barely a month before heading back to uni and i come back holidays. if i wanted to take one of these eleven week courses, i think id have to geta fuckin liscence and a car and drive to glasgow 3 hrs both ways for a class once a week and that sjust stupid. im so fucking mad about this missed opportunity. like my muscles are itching and aching to do it. my legs want to work out in ballet positions. they just rly do. yeah maybe ill have to start doing barre at home from videos to try ease that, but its not gonna be the same and ill do it all wrong bc i have no teacher to direct me or anything. correct either. sure if i had done it and loved it i might still be mad that i have no opportunities to continue like i want to, but at least id have that expereince and could keep practicing at home based off of it.  i am genuinely upset okay. upset betrayed disappointed sad twitchy and ugh. sure tickets go on sale today to swan lake after exams. and by fuck will i go see it. and ill get all the background before it and know it inside and out before i see it (already kinda do) and i will love it. ill bemaybe more upset and more twitchy that i cant do it, that i cant be lie them and that rly sucks. i really really wish by some miracle the school would offer summer courses so that i could just, get myself after exams into one. also another frustrating thing not quite so pressing on my mind is how my dad wants me to get summer jobs, maybe even two. one here and one in finland. sure it should theoretically be easier getting it here, esp. since im 19 now and yeah. i could work in a cafe or store just to get money and have smth to put on a cv thats not 2 weeks. but i dunno i dont particularly want to, i was hoping in london i could get the most of it culturaly (considering ive been a pouting and sad whailer whos not done anything for the last two years) then again i have p much no friends here so if i did go work somewhere theres a slight chance thered be someone i get along with and could hang out w. or visit if i needa back in london. i dunno. things are weird. sure i could try get an admin job w nhs like some lady suggested but its one of those too much responsibilty things, consdiering im shit with work i kinda would prefer to do some physical job like stacking shelves in a shop bc im good at that. but thats not gonna help me in the future. money yes, but cv building or careers wise? nah. i should owrk in hospitality or smth i dunno even i can barely get thru my work to pass rn so  i dunno about job searching. im jsut a mess am i not. regardless maybe i should look if theres other ballet schoolsin london. be desperate, get a job and a ballet class going over summer and do art on the free time i guess. 

okay so fer now ive found a course for like fucking 156 pound thats a 2 day full days course that looks mad cool for having different classes to learn vocab and etc and then a bit of fucking swanlake like yooo.. best thing its in like july but thats also possibly bad bc its july 28-29 and july 30 we move out. man it could be cool tho. then they offer there as well a taster session p much every other week and then a full 8 weeks of class p near by to me. sure this is specifically taught by a man and id prefer a woman but, i guess. since its ideal timing and place. and i got wondering why thats 150 and the national ballet wouldve been abt 90 and i guess there i get concession and it wouldve been only 6 classes considering the dates they had off. i should rly ask if they do do concession bc 150 is a bit steep still. for 8 classes thats almost 20 pound for 75 mins. its kinda insane. theres probably more companies i havent looked at but there is one other thats like a drop in thing 10 pound cash each class and thats a 90 mins so it might be better. ofc. obv. fault being that its drop in so being an absolute beginner w likely a lot older adults idk how id fit in or keep up or get hte most of it. i think ill go try it once regardless. then when back in abdn ask around for taster sessions and beginner ballet. worst comes to worst i wait another 4 years till i get to a big enough city that they have a nice ballet company and somewhere i can live like an adult but also get in on adult ballet and enjoy myself. maybe my industrial placement city will have  a ballet company idk. 

all i know is that im a bit obsessed and everyone says to go for your dreams etc. and as much as i enjoy archery (slowly gonna dedicate to it) and aikido (though training can be frustrating and training with old men isnt that fun) and ice skating is another less of a dream but in the same realm as ballet. that im gonan get new skates for and give it a better try. i just think ballet could  be so fucking rad and im sad that its not so easy rn. and that my mom fucked me over. for that one course that couldve been cheap and amazing and mindchanging. to go to the ballet knowing what some of it feels like would be great. sure id love  a chance to do some after as well u know. ofc it sucks it might cost a couple hundred over summer to these hobbies and i feel iffy spending 180 on a quality waterproof jacket. sure. they spend it but, im v concientious and dont wanna spend much of their money esp cus im not making my own. i guess logically, i should put a bunch of effort to getting thru this term rly well without lies and get a sumemr job. that way, i could theoretically take loan from my parents  and pay back with summer job money w some left over to do as i like with (yeah i should save it for sensible shit but idk) also considering how nice i am my dad might not even want me to pay back. look i dunno. thats an idea. be good, be rewarded w ballet classes and an unstrained relationship w my parents, joyously move back to finland and start next term w a clean slate, hopefully more help and new determination into hobbies. maybe i wanna do 4 sports since i never did much as i was younger. tho sure, i did aikidos cousin taekwondo. ive shot a bow and arrow whenever i had a chance. ive skated since literally like 3 yrs old. and i used to take a form of dance a alot younger. sure no musicality but i think the exercises would be great for my knees and legs and butt and torso and posture. htese are fun sports since i dont like to work out. and since im not comfortable enough in myself to go swim. 

#ballet an hobbies and thoughts and lots of things. #honestly noneed to read

[imsarabum]

Responses to {Part 27} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU Asks~

 Please ‘Keep Reading’ to find my response to your ask ^^ As always, I have copied and pasted all asks into this post in regards to last night’s chapter to avoid clogging up people’s dashboards and to avoid spoilers for those who may still wish to read the chapter. Thank you ^^

(I have also included asks that I received before this IWSY chapter was posted ^^)

P.S I’M SORRY THIS POST IS LATE I AM IN LONDON RIGHT NOW ON EASTER BREAK U-U

Anonymous said: IWSY is the first fanfic I've been reading for so long! Seriously, this is a story like a drug. I'm that type of impatient reader, so I'm curious to know how long you plan to continue this story? When will my life be over?

Thank you for reading it for this amount of time!! But I’m really sorry, I can’t answer your questions because I don’t know myself. I get people always asking me this question but I honestly don’t know xD You guys will know when I do! It probably won’t be for too much longer; we’ll just have to see!! ^^

@btsfanficss said: I'm so excited for IWSY!! Thank you for your hard work and please remember to rest properly ❤️❤️❤️

Thank you so much bby!! I will try :) but this week is so busy for me and I am currently in London *sweats* lol I hope you have a great week and that you’ll enjoy the new chapter!!

Anonymous said: i binge read I wont stop you, my emotions were all over the place AND IM STILL NOT DONE. you are such a good writer omg. i love you and your writing😚

WAAAh thank you for binge reading it lol! thank you so much you’re so sweet and I love you too deary!! :D

Anonymous said: Girl, I'M READY *DRAMTICALLY GRABS TISSUES*   Ps: i read a lot of  filipino readers here. Hello guys *waves*  -fanfrmph

GRAB THE TISSUES AND HOLD ON TO YOUR BUTTS! hehe~ Actually I’ve always been interested to know where the majority of people who red my fanfiction live. I wish there was a way I could know without exposing people’s identities hehe~ I hope you’ll enjoy the update tonight love!

@mocking-butts said: It's Tuesday oh god oh god I'm not ready I'm going to sob mumsy what do i do it's Tuesday oh my goodness I'm going to die I'm not ready for this help meeee i hope im not going to die and sob my eyes out even though I will oh god.

aHHHHHH I hope you’ll like it my love please don’t cry!! :c

Anonymous said: heyyy, i just wanted to ask when is the new chapter coming? I rly enjoy reading the fanfic and the storyline is great, can't wait to see how will it develop in the future 🌌💟💟

I upload new chapters of IWSY every Tuesday evening between 9pm and 10pm UK Time (this is written at the beginning of every chapter^^) thank you so much for enjoying the story my love!!

@deangetoutofmyspleen said: ITS TUESDAY

IT IS TUESDAY

Anonymous said: I'm actually fucking sobbing at this point

Me everyday tbh

@im-that-chesire-jax said: OH MY GOD THAT WAS SO GOOD. and I kept having theories about her changing and Yoongi being her master and I kept thinking "she's a domitor, she's special so what if she can't have a master?" AND IM SO HYPE AND EXCITED THAT I FINALLY PREDICTED SOMETHING. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR WRITING I WILL CONTINUE TO SUPPORT YOU FOR AS LONG AS YOU CONTINUE WRITING

AGHGVGJBWKG THANK YOU SO MUCH I WAS SO NERVOUS ABOUT POSTING THIS CHAPTER SO IM SO HAPPY THAT YOU LIKED IT THANK YOU DKHSBDGKJSNGJSEG I love you :3

Anonymous said: Hahahaha even tho Yoongi's the loml, i hope he gets the fucking revenge he deserves and y/n ruins him and his existence

We will see what happens!! Thank you so much for reading :D

Anonymous said: OOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUOH MY GAIIIIIII💔

*Jungkook voice* ohmygod!

Anonymous said: I know she's not actually bound to him, but my heart still aches for Jungkook and Taehyung because as far as they're aware, they've both lost the person the love and a person they care about. I'm happy Namjoon is feeling now, and as hopeless as it might be, in genuinely happy the there's still /something/ between Tae and Yoongi.

Yes - because they have no idea what she has just experienced! :( And of course, Yoongi may not be *good* like the other characters in the story, but he still has some empathy and love inside of him, or so it seems! Thank you so much for reading the chapter dear :)

@chimkookie said: GURL I'M ACTUAL DYING CHAPTER 27 OF I WON'T STOP YOU WAS THE SHIT OMG I'M DYING! ASDFGHJKL I'M CRYING SDFGHJKL ASDFGHJKL ASDFGHJKL!

AGHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH MY LOVE I’M SO HAPPY YOU LIKED IT!!

Anonymous said: OH MAN SHE'S GONNA DO THE "SURPRISE I FOLLOWED YOU AROUND LIKE A HELPLESS PUPPY WHEN ACTUALLY I'M THE MOST POWERFUL THING ON THIS EARTH SO DIE NOW PLEASE" ON HIM

GASP LET’S SEE!!! :3

@xokookiebts said: OH MY GOD IM PULLING MY HAIR OUT AT THE CLIFFHANGER FOR PART 27. I JUST WANT HER TO WHOOP HIS ASS REAL QUICK BUT NOT KILL HIM. LIKE MAKE HIM REALIZE WHO'S THE MASTER DJDJJS. OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT ANOTHER WEEK FOR THE NEXT PART. IM GONNA COMBUST.

Pls no hair pulling that sounds painful! :c AND PLEASE DO NOT COMBUST THAT WOULD MAKE ME REALLY SAD BUT THANK YOU FOR READING IT BABE :3

Anonymous said:THE NEW CHAPTER I AM SCREAMING THIS JUST TOOK A DIFFERENT TURN AND I LOVE IT

I HOPE YOU LIKED THE NEW TURN I WAS SO NERVOUS TO POST IT THANK YOU SO MUCH AGHHH

@sundaymorningblues14 said: Wow. I am speechless, that was beautifully written. You truly have a gift! I absolutely loved the way you described the spirit (is that the right term?). I can't wait to see what the protagonist is going to do next! Thank you darling xx

Thank you so much beautiful ^^ I’m so so happy you loved how the sine nomine was described! You can refer to them however you wish - a spirit, a god, a power; whatever feels right to you! You’re so welcome and thank you very much for reading it *hug*

@shineeshawol204 said: I. Am. ScReAmInG!¡!¡ FUCK UGH I CANT THAT WAS SO GOOD AND JUST UGH HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WAIT ANOTHER WEEK?!  YOU HURT ME YOU KNOW THAT SARA?!

*screams with you* THANK YOU SO MUCH BABE! I didn’t mean tto hurt you though I am sorry :(

Anonymous said: Omg... THE FEEEEELLLLSSS MAN. How could u do this to me... I don't know what I'm feeling right now... I feel, almost... lost? You are an incredibly amazing writer and I feel blessed to be able to have read that and felt the way I did. Please continue on to make my, and many other people's lives happy with what you are writing xxx luv uuuuuu ☺️❤️

Don’t be lost - I’ll find you! *cheesy* Ahhhh thank you so much you’re really too kind to me but I am so happy that you got to feel all those emotions from the story. Thank you and I love you too dear ^^

@animeimmortal said: DO YOU HEAR MY HEART? IT STOPPED LIKE HALF WAY I am still so flipping amazed at all the scenery and detailed descriptions you put in there WHAT WAS WITH THAT ENDING but then again if thats a prank that she's just saying that for the lulz then I would honestly do the same 😊 i don't know what to expect in very excited about the next chapter ❤❤❤ much love

I’LL BRING YOU BACK TO LIFE HOLD UP~~~ I’m glad you liked the scenery and the detail, I personally really enjoyed writing that part. It felt very serene and calming to write it ^^ hehe, thank you so so much for reading my love!

Anonymous said: Questions: 1)What? 2)WHYISJIMINSTILLDEADYOUTOLDMEHEWAS- 3)Am I messing with Yoongi or....? 4) Hoseok's  gonna wake up and be like '...What the-' 5)Serrena's gonna come in and be like '...What in the-' 6)YAY JOONIE ISN'T DEAD 7)Why didn't I ask the gender ambiguous person if Jimin is deads?! 8)WhAt? 9)Can we be friends? 10)Do you know the Muffin Man? 11)Wow I asked a lot of questions, but you did this to yourself. 12)Some of these weren't even questions lol  LAST QUESTION: WHaT? - <3 Vampnip anon

Hello Vampnip anon! My, my! You have a lot of questions...but I guess you will have to wait until the next chapter to see if I answer them in it :3 BUT I CAN SAY RIGHT NOW THAT YES LET’S BE FRIENDS BECAUSE I KNOW THE MUFFIN MAN LET’S GO EAT MUFFINS :3

Anonymous said: I've literally just been sat, staring at my wall, for the past hour. This chapter gave me feelings I ain't never had before. I'm surprised I haven't burnt holes into my wall with how intense my thinking stare is 😂😘😘

I’m rather glad that you haven’t burnt holes into your wall, that would be rather unfortunate you and the landlord to find yourselves in that predicament D: This chapter gave you feelings you never had before? Well...perhaps I am a domitor - giving you feelings? *ba dum dum chiiii* excuse me my dad jokes are lame I’m leaving GOODNIGHT THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING

Anonymous said: Idk man i want iwsy to end happy, but at the same time i want it to be angsty. KILLS ME IM EXCITED AF TO SEE HOW IT ENDS, IM READY

I wonder how it will end!!!??? :3

@mysr3 said: This Ch is OMG, took my breath away at every details- like a ray of light in darkness! Thank you so much! Cant wait to know what her motive is! Next CH is going to b on FiRE! JK at the end is pricelss! U r such a talented writer even I already said it but ill say again bc it fact! U r Awesome! Thank you for bringing such another wonderful scenario to us! I love you ❤ Plz take care of urself n Hope you have a good night/ good week n wish you all the luck in the world Love ღღღ

You’re so sweet I’m smiling like a complete idiot oh my god?? D: what did I do to deserve you, you little ray of sunshine?! hehe :3 I love you too and i also hope that you will take good care of yourself and have a great week!! :3

Anonymous said: I DONT EVEN CARE I JUST NEED CHIM CHIM TO BE ALIVE #savechimchim #praytothelord #heissocutehecantdie #immadieifsomeonedoesntsavehim

#SAVECHIMCHIM2017

Anonymous said: No...just no...how could you do that to me... and then make me wait another week to find out what happens?!?!!?!?!!?!

Because...I’m evil...but I love you...:3 *runs away*

@jynxy24 said: Forgot it was Tuesday😂😂  YOUR CHAPTER HAS SURPIRSED ME UNTIL I HAD TO PRAY TO FATHER SUGA WILLIAMS ADAM THE THIRD AND YAS I HAVE DIED FROM READING YOUR WONDERFUL CHAPTER THANK YOU SARA IT WAS FUCKING GREAT AND GOODBYE LIFE I'M DEAD😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

OMG lol FATHER SUGA WILLIAMS ADAM THE THIRD I’M ON THE FLOOR SKKLNSNEWJEHNNEH THANK YOU FOR READING AAND YOU’RE WELCOME I HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY MY LOVE

@namjoonismybias said: Oh my god IWSY was- I can't even😵 keep up the good work!😁✌️❤

Thank you so much for reading my little sugarplum!!

@semisweetsuga said: FUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK THAT WAS SO GOOD OH MY GODDDD

KOTO YOUR AVATAR IS SO FUCKING CUTE I’M PEEING

@deangetoutofmyspleen said: my mom thought i was dying, but i was actually just reading IWSY so yEP IM CRYING AND SCREAMING I LOVE THIS SERIES IM EMOTIONAL. i need more soodkckvkgkgkkh

OMG LOL SORRY MUM xD Thank you so much and I apologise if your mum had a heartattack cos she thought you were dying lolol :3

 @mocking-butts said: IM SCREAMING OH MY GOD KYFCNIGFNLFFKNVGK PLS BE NEXT WEEK

I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT BBY!!

Anonymous said: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT HAPPEN

Anonymous said: You really are an incredible writer

*blush* you’re too kind, but thank you so much. Seriously.

Anonymous said: Damn damn damn. I knew it! I knew she was gonna be turned AND PREGNANT all at the same time mmhm mmhm. Y/N bout to fuck shit up. You had me dying at "you'll never walk alone" I was like no she didn't just go there. Excited for next week whioooop

YAY YOU GOT THE YOU’LL NEVER WALK ALONE REFERENCE YAAAAAY! ehehe :3 thank you so much my love, I hope you’ll enjoy next weeks too ^^

@snoopy198712 said: Please let some of her powers be able 2 bring Jimin back 2 life & let her be the one 2 either kill Yoongi or Turn him over so the other vampire can kill please allow Namjoon 2 be good please I love this story so much I wait every Tuesday luv it

I hope she’ll be able to do all that and that everything will work out fine in the end! :( but thank you so much for reading and I’m so happy that you look forward to it each week my love :)

@ohheyitsebonyrose said: AAAHHHH OMG SNEAKY SNEAKY Y/N!! Even though it breaks my heart it's good to know it's not because he's actually her master. Another great chapter again Sara!!

Sneaky lil fox! :3 Thank you so much my love, I’m really glad you enjoyed it! ^^

Anonymous said: Yeah just take my heart u already have my feelings take it all  --wifey anon 🐇 (cont.) For once I am not worried because I know YN knows exactly what she s doing  Also I cannot help but think about (Y/N) x Jungkook sex like yn can feel so much things it ll take this expérience to the next level I believe  --wifey anon 🐇

me: collector of souls, hearts and feelings :3 ANd yes! At least you know what her intentions are - despite the cliffhanger! And ooooooog you’re the first person to have mentioned that :3 yes!! I bet it will hehe~ thank you so so much for reading wifey anon! ^^

@deboracorrea25 said: OMG! OMG! OMG! It was fantastic! Despite the fact that you made me cry for a moment, it was still a perfect chapter. All the answers you provided, made a smile grow and widen in my face. And she becoming much more glorious and strong... I just loved it! I knew she would call him master, she's smart and I love her. Thanks for this amazing part of IWSY. Love you!!

I’m sorry for making you cry :( but thank you so much my love! and I love you too~ i’m so happy you liked it!

@doubletroublesince1994 said: I mean yeah, it's perfectly normal for me to read this at past midnight when my finals are just in 45 days and I also have an exam in physics and chemistry in 2 days (For which I'm not ready AT ALL)  THE THINGS YOU DO TO ME OH SARA

Awwwww babe I’m sorry your finals are so close! :( I APOLOGISE FOR ANY PAIN I’VE CAUSED YOU PLS DON’T HATE MEEEE

Anonymous said: I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU FOR ALL THE GOOD NEWS IN IWSY I LOVE YOU MAN I LOVE YOU AND YOUR WORK PLS CARRY ON WITH WRITING 😂❤ ignore me

I love you too! You’re so so sweet thank you so much my dear ^^

Anonymous said: I FEEL SO BAD FOR JUNGKOOK LIKE HIS HEART IS PROBABLY BROKEN PLEASE LET HIM IN ON THE READER'S PLAN. Ok but seriously amazing chapter!! -Tall anon

Hopefully everything will work out in the next chapter :3 Thank you so much tall anon!

@rainbowluversunite2011 said: IWSY had me SCREAMINGG. I hate that i have to wait a week 😖 It's soooo good! It's amazing, i can't breath right oh lord. You're awesome btw. and so is your story 💜✨

You are awesome too my love! Thank you so much for reading and I’m really glad you enjoyed the update :D

Anonymous said: OMG THIS NEW CHAPTER OF IWSY HAS ME FEELING ME SOME KIND OF WAY THAT I CANNOT EXPLAIN, I'M FEELING HAPPY, ANGRY, SAD, ANXIOUS AND EXCITED ALL AT ONCE. I MEAN, SHE'S A VAMPIRE AND A DOMITOR AND IS CARRYING A BABY AND MY GOD I JUST NEED MORE, Tuesday is so close but so far at the same tim, I can barely wait!

I’m glad that this chapter could bring out all these feelings for you :3 that makes me super happy hehe! Thank you so so much my love ^^

@jungkookbangtaned said: OMG HEY NO SARA HOW CAN YOU END THE CHAPTER LIKE THIS OMG OMG AND I THOUGHT I WAS DEAD FOR REAL. AND THEN THIS. AND THEN POOR CHRIST JUNGKOOK OMG OMG WHYTT😭😭😭 *even if it may not seem, I still love you and your writing BUT JUST PLEASE NEXT TIME GIVE US SOME MERCY OH MY GOD

NOPE NO DEAD FOR REAL hehe~ I love you too but I offer no mercy :P Thank you so much for reading the update my dear I’m glad you liked it!!

@clara-licht said: *woke up* *checked watch* Oh, it's 4.30 AM.... IWSY should be updated already. *read story* .....NOW I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER WHOLE WEEK *tried to go back to sleep* *couldn't sleep due to excitement* Well there goes the rest of my rest XD Seriously though, the newest one left me shook. That last bit kinda excites me, what would Kook do about that? And how will Yoongs react? After all, domitors aren't tied to anyone, so that bit over there must be an act.

Oh my god I’m so sorry to hear that you couldn’t get back to sleep my dear :( But I’m glad that you enjoyed the update! And yes - how will Yoongi react D: I wonder! D: Thank you so much dear for reading :D

@fashionkilla124 said: I'm dying at the end if the new chapter cuz I know she GON BEAT HIS ASS 😂😂 YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS ABOUT TO GO DOWN NEXT WEEK IM CRYING FROM LAUGHING SO HARD SEND HELP 😂😂💀💀

SHE’S GONNA BEAT HIM UP YAY hopefully :3 thank you so much love!

@pandafish said: ooohoh!!!!! why is she calling him master though?? i hope it's just a trick.  i wonder if she'll kill yoongi :O

You’ll just have to wait and see! :3

Anonymous said: Just a random question, Sara.... WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO END ON A CLIFFHANGER?! wait, but then again, leaving off on a cliff hangers gives all of us the opportunity to come up with mostly inaccurate theories about what will happen next... hmm, okay then, no complaints. IWSY part 27? (jeez it's been so long since the beginning, I'm starting to loose track...) anyways, pt 27 was really really good! Hah! Take that, Yoongi! Your little plan didn't work! I'm looking forward to next week!- army anon

Because, dear army anon, I am a bitch ^^ hehe~ And I love reading people’s inaccurate or accurate deductions so much :3 Thank you so much for thinking that the chapter was good dear, it means so much to me ^^

Anonymous said: please bring Jimin back, please!!! (-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩___-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩) he means so much to Taehyung!

He hasn’t even died and you want him to come back! lol

Anonymous said: daaaaaaamn sara, back at it again with the cliff-hangers. 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻 from now on i'm calling u the cliff-hanger goddess, featuring ur most notable work "i won't stop you [from cliff-hanging]" 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

I am satisfied with this title *smug face* :3

Anonymous said: "You will never walk alone" ahhhhhhh I'm crying for multiple reasons ... man I was waiting all week for that chapter and I'm not disappointed!!!! I'm so excited for more and I'm still on edge for next week and!! Your writing is so good!!! Thank you so much k thx bye <3

I’m so happy that you and a few other people seem to have gotten the reference that I slipped in there :3 hehe thank you so much for reading my love and I hope you enjoy the next part too! :D

@rahrah25 said: This chapter of "I Won't Stop You" was just  breathtaking I'm still in awe of how wonderfully and beautifully you read this chapter this is my favorite fanfic thank you for sharing your incredible work:) ❤❤

I’m smiling so much of my goodness c: thank you my love, your words mean the world to me! Thank you even more for reading my series^^

@purrfectcupof-tae said: Omg you used the "you never walk alone" phrase in IWSY and I'm just weak 😭 i love your writing and I hope to become just as great as you 💕

I did use the never walk alone phrase :3 thank you for picking up on it!! :3 And I am sure you are already a great writer - honestly, mine is mediocre at best :D thank you for your wonderful words regardless my love ^^

Anonymous said: OOOOOH SHIT DAMN ITS THE FUCKING CLIFF HANGER AGAIN BUT ANYWAYS FUCK YAH THE CHAPTER WAS AMAZING AS ALWAYS ٩( 'ω' )و ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

YAY THANK YOU SO MUCH SWEETIPIE ANON!

@mnmiyukiko18 said: Hun bun, I love you and your work so much... But I swear if Jimin dies in IWSY I don't know if I'll be able to forgive you.

I really hope he won’t die then! *scared face*

Anonymous said: I (an almost 20 year old) literally squeeled when I remembered it was IWSY Tuesday. And oh boy was I blessed this week. Chapter 27 was (literally, haha) an out of body experience. I am so in love with how you've developed this plot. And the sine nomine? Incredible. Unexpected. Amazing. It's clear how much thought and detail you've put into this series, and it is such a complete pleasure to read. Also, the JK stan in me is so ready for eternal power couple Y/N and Jungkook like HELL YEA. - 종달새 <3

I’m so thankful that you loved the sine nomine character - I was really hoping that it would be a nice, fresh organic arch to a vampire story! ETERNAL POWER COUPLE HELL YES LET’S GO! Thank you for always being such a sweetheart, I appreciate it more than words can describe - thank you ^^

@sinae said: I've been following along with I Won't Stop You for a while now and I am so amazed with your writing! I check every Tuesday for a new update because I am so curious as to where the story leads! This chapter was amazing as always, and I am so excited for the next one!! Thank you for sharing your writing! I hope you are doing wonderful♡ (Pls tell me Jimin is okay don't hurt me like this lol)

Ahh, thank you so much for following it for a long time ^^ Even tho it has been running for 27 weeks now! You’re welcome for the stories but thank you even more for reading them ^^ I hope you are also doing wonderfully love!!

Anonymous said: I hereby invite you to this poor army's funeral. She will be dearly missed after we found her screaming and sobbing in her room after reading the last chapter of IWSY.   Please bring flowers (and Jeon Jungkook if possible)

Listen; no funerals will be had because I refuse to let you die! I 100% wish I could bring you flowers and Jeon Jungkook~ Those two things could heal ANYONE’S broken heart I think!

Anonymous said: NOOOOOO I need the next chapter right N O W :( every chapter literally keeps me at the edge of my seat.... praying that this series will never end so I can have my weekly dose of fantasy ㅠㅠ -bunnykookie96

Hello bunnykookie96!! my fellow 96liner :D I wish I could give you the next chapter right now but...I don’t even have it written yet ::( I’m sorry!! but thank you so much for reading it dear ^^

@kookieslaugh said: wait wait wait, when y/n wakes up from her ''death'' is Jungkook slowly dying?? I mean he was in a fight with Seokjin and kind of got rly beat up? bc if he's slowly dying then so aM I!!! Btw I love I won't stop so much like you have no idea how much I'm looking forward to every Tuesday ahhhhh ❤️

Ahhh no, it was more like - her calling Yoongi her ‘master’ killed Jungkook on the inside because he doesn’t know what’s really going on ^^ Thank you so much sweetkins!!

@lostheretics said: shit is gettin real im jungshooked

me as fuck

@koreaisanaddiction said: MY THEORY WAS CORRECT!!!! so good this is an amazing chapter i want more!!!

YAY YOU GUESSED CORRECTLY!! Thank you so much for thinking it was amazing :D

@killingalltheflowers said: Omg this chapter was so beautiful. I have no words to describe it.. And I feel the badassness coming in the next chapter *^* AW I' M SO EXCITED!! YOU'RE THE BEST.

*sobs* thank you so much my love!

Anonymous said: SARA MY BABE! CHAPTER 27 IS SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO GOOD THAT I AM TRULY AT A LOSS OF WORDS... SWEETCAKES YOU WRITE SOOOO DAMN WELL! ❤❤❤❤❤

I’M TRULY SO HAPPY THAT YOU ENJOYED IT!!! Thank you so much beautiful ^^

Anonymous said: IM SCREAMING SARA OH MY GODNJSDKK IM A 3RD YEAR COLLEGE STUDENT AND I MAJOR IN LIBRARY AND INFORMATION SCIENCE THE MOMENT I SEE SINE NOMINE I SCREAM youre prob aware of it but we use sine nomine [s.n] in cataloguing when theres no author mentioned in a book and sine loco [s.l] if theres no publisher stated sjsjsjsjsjs i just okay i flip my shit out im sorry anYWAY i mentioned last time i had some theory it didnt cover most of it so im still waiting for the next tHIS IS AN AWESOME UPDATE IM

Awwww yesssss! sine nomine is latin for ‘nameless’ so I wanted this powerful entity to have some kind of name. I thought that was most fitting ^^ hehe language is so amazing and how we use it, right? ^^ Thank you so much love and I hope you will be able to see if your theories are correct or not soon! :D

Anonymous said: Even tho my spring break ends this week, I can't fucking wait till next tuesday. Tuesdays are my favourite days of the week thanks to you ❤

My spring break will also end this week :( I’m still in London tho so it’s fun!! I’m so happy that Tuesdays are good days for you because of IWSY - thank you for being amazing and lovely :D

Anonymous said: SHE IS BOUTTA TRICK YOONGI AND BEAT HIS ASS THEN BRING JIMIN BACK OR SOMETHING IT HAS TO BE

IT’S ABOUT TO GO DOWN MY FRIENDO!

@xtigerlily said: I usually don't like to read anything longer than a oneshot but I'm hooked on I Wont Stop You. I can't stop thinking about it all day. You're a fantastic writer and i'm so glad I found your page :) keep it up!

Well I feel honoured that you gave IWSY a chance even thought it’s not a oneshot! Thank you so much!! :3

Anonymous said: holo Sara!! i've been wondering about this a lot. in IWSY, where did the names 'natum lamia' (i think thats how you spell it) and 'sine nomine' come from? did you learn Latin? :o

I don’t speak Latin fluently but I know some odd words here and there! But the reason as to why I have included Latin names in IWSY is because of the lore I chose to make as the background of my story. I didn’t just want to use English because I believe that the story would have lost it’s depth and feel! :D

@noceurash said: WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS BJFGH,, i love you very much bby but you've killed me eternally gdgh. Iwsy was good aaah , have a lovely day~~~~ ♡

I love you too and Im so sorry for killing you eternally :( But thank you so much my love and I hope you have a great day too!! ^^

@idgaf97 said: I just want to say I've been a long time reader of IWSY and I absolutely love it. I think it's one of the best stories I've read (fanfic or not.) Jungkook has always looked like a vampire prince to me lol. Much love from The States (Chicago)!

Thank you so much for being a long time reader! :3 And yes -- Jungkook has always given me Vampire vibes~~ Conversely, Taehyung has always given me Werewolf vibes lol I did write a oneshot smut about Werewolf!Taehyung :3 He’s such an adorable little puppy hehe ^^ And heeeeey Chicago! Thank you my love :D

Anonymous said: Sara, why the cliff-hanger? Oh god now im dying in here.whyyyyyyy

I don’t know I swear it’s my evil twin that does it :(

Anonymous said: Hi yes hello, I'd just like you to know that I just spent the whole day reading I Won't Stop You, and I have to say that you're an incredible writer!! I legit was reading it during my uni classes!! Anyway thank you for writing such a wonderful story and I'm looking forward to the future chapters :D (Jimin though :'(

Gah thank you so much sweetkins! And tut tut you should be focusing on Uni work you naughty student you (jk that’s like me everyday lol) Thank you so much for reading my story as it means a lot to me!! Good luck during your University classes :D

#imsarabum #IWSY #I Won't Stop You #Asks #Responses