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#im just looking forward to move out to college but oh god what if im not free even then
dazed-hee · 1 year
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Enhypen Hyung Trope Series ; L.H.S
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Heeseung: Second Chance Love part of Enha Hyung Line Trope Series
pairing: ex-bf!Heeseung x fem!reader 
warnings & tags: angst, fluff, slowburn-ish, mentions of divorce and family issues, drinking, cheating(?), suggestive kinda at the end - just a little making out , pls lmk if im missing anything! , not proof read.
word count: 8.2K (SORRY)
synopsis: After breaking up in their third year of high school, Heeseung and Y/N meet again attending the same college. What happens when the two are forced to face each other again after a bad breakup that leaves one of them wishing for second chances, and hint, it’s not Y/N or so she thought.
📌: Hi everyone! Finally posting Heeseung’s trope! I hope everyone enjoys this nice little read if you wanted something to distract yourself or kill some time with! I also hope you look forward to the other tropes in the series and please make sure to like and reblog! I would like to say this is probably the most cliche one out of all of them but please still give it just as much love, didn’t want to do anything too crazy for the first series! 
As a new writer here I’m looking for other Enha writers to be moots with so please don’t be afraid to reach out to me! Once again thank you so much for all the love on the series masterlist I posted please look forward to the rest! 🤍
taglist : @seungiepup @skzenhalove @lilactangerine @jwnghyuns​ @seungcheolswife @loves0ft ( OPENED check pinned or use ask!)
©2023 , dazed-hee . Please do not repost , plagiarize or translate anywhere ty!
“Y/N hurry up or we’ll be late!” Yunjin called out from the living room of your shared apartment.
“Yeah just give me a second!” You cursed fiddling with the ends of your khaki-colored skirt trying your best to make sure your ass wasn’t completely out as it was the first time you were meeting your old classmates again after two years. “Maybe this is too much..” You mumbled raking your fingers through your freshly washed and styled hair as a conflicted expression painted your face.
Almost on queue, Yunjin swung the door open with an unamused expression on her face. 
“Alright I know you want to look good for Lee Heeseung but you’re taking too long, the cab is here.” You flicked her off mumbling a small ‘not that asshole’ as you grabbed your necessities and slipped on your boots making sure to get one last look at your outfit before rushing after Yunjin who was already out the door.
“You look hot babe don’t even worry about it.” She comforted you with a small smirk playing on her lips.
“Oh my god, I haven’t seen everyone in so long.” You huffed anxiously shoving your hands into your black jacket trying to hide the way your knuckles were turning white at the pure thought of seeing everyone again, especially him. “I know you’re nervous but promise me when I say they’re going to totally be shocked to see you again, in a good way of course. You left so suddenly back in third year after... you know.” Yunjin spoke her eyes focused on her phone that brightened her side of the cab.
Biting your lips you replayed the memories of your last days at the same school everyone attended. It was fun, you weren’t going to lie.
Always having people to rely on and hang out with before and after school was something you missed once you transferred schools. Losing contact with everyone besides Yunjin it was a big surprise when you informed your best friend you’ll be moving back to Seoul to attend college with her transferring after your first year.
“I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you too.” Yunjin snickered earning a small punch to the side. 
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Lee Heeseung.
You dated him after starting high school up to the first couple weeks of the third year, being in the same friend group and being the two who had the most in common it was bound to happen.
He was a sweet boy, always walking you home from school whether it be after your activities or from the library followed by kisses and hugs. He never failed to check up on you throughout the day despite his class being on the other side of the building. Celebrating birthdays together and exams you both aced after helping each other study felt like something straight out of a movie. 
“Alright, you two that’s enough, just because you and her are in a relationship doesn’t mean we have to be in it too.” Jay rolled his eyes as Jake and Sunghoon laughed in the back. Heeseung leaned away from your side as he rolled his eyes at Niki making kissy faces and Sunoo gagging in the back. You made sure to give him another peck on the cheek before allowing Jay back into his assigned seat taking in the smell of musk and grass, they must have freshened up from morning practice. 
“I’ll see you later Hee.” you smiled as he threw you a wink rolling your eyes at Jake who threw a flying kiss at you, earning him a wack from your boyfriend. Walking out with Niki, Jungwon, and Sunoo you failed to notice the lingering gaze of Heeseung, admiring the way your laugh filled the air and your pretty hair framing your face. Lovestruck was an understatement, the moment you and Heeseung met sparks were flying. Having bonded over your similarities when it came to comics you read and music you liked Heeseung took a liking to you really fast. Although it took a bit of courting to convince you to say yes to him, you were worth it.
“Dude, how did you even pull Y/N? The same taste in anime, and music, and on top of that someone who supports your league addiction? Should’ve been me.” Jay sighed shaking his head and ignoring Heeseung’s glare. 
“She’s coming to the game this weekend right?” Sunghoon asked grinning already knowing the answer. You were always there supporting him, not just Heeseung but all your friends as well, and they loved you for that. Heeseung couldn’t ask for a better girlfriend. 
Not only were you obviously pretty, but you were also smart, always being at the top of your class and in many extracurriculars. You were also very kind, not minding to volunteer or help out your peers regardless if it was tutoring or if the student council needed an extra person to run meetings. But what Heeseung loved the most was your ability to always make him laugh, you laughed at his jokes and he laughed at yours regardless if they were actually funny or not. He just loved to see you smile. 
It felt like it was too good to be true, and it was. 
It was no shock Heeseung was considered handsome and the guys in their group were too, you were never the jealous type being someone who was always complimented and sought after as well. But sometimes it was just too much. Especially after he and the boys became star players of your school’s soccer team it only allowed for more girls and more opportunities to worry about. It wasn’t that you couldn’t trust Heeseung, you couldn’t trust other people. 
“Baby trust me when I say those girls were just being friendly, I’ll even be with Jake and Sunghoon if it makes you feel better.” He rubbed your cheek as you stood outside your house. It was a Friday evening and Heeseung asked if you wanted to come to a party to celebrate the team making it to nationals, unfortunately, you told him you had plans to go visit family in the town over for the weekend. In reality, you and your parents were traveling to meet with a lawyer to finalize their divorce, not as fun as a party to celebrate with your friends. 
After he became friends with upperclassmen and other people from your neighboring schools you can’t help but notice the amount of attention he would receive especially from girls. 
“Hee I trust you, I just don’t like the way some of the girls look at you..especially knowing you’re taken,” you whispered under your breath biting on your bottom lip annoyed. You never wanted to hinder Heeseung from doing what he wanted, the both of you understood there was a time and place for everything. Both having your own friends and your own lives, like you stated before you trusted him just not the people he was around. You’ve seen the looks some of the girls gave you, it never wavered you but it did show you some of them didn’t care whether he was taken or not.
Heeseung who was standing on the lower step of the stairs that lead to your door couldn’t hide his grin as you spoke, you were just looking out for him as you would say. But he knew you were a lil jealous, now you knew how he felt when you had all these guys asking you to help with their case studies and practice problems.
Everything changed after one day you decided to visit his class as he always came to visit you, although it was a little far but you didn’t mind if it meant you could see his cute smile again after a long session of calculus. 
As you walked closer to his classroom you noticed the faint sounds of laughter emitting from the door and walked in seeing him with another girl at his assigned desk giggling and laughing with each other alone. Her hands grabbed his shoulder before casually running it down his arms and to your horror he didn’t shake her off. You’ve never voiced your insecurities before but it didn’t matter, this was something that didn’t need to be said aloud as not being okay. 
You weren’t going to accuse him of being unfaithful, but your eyes couldn’t deceive you. Seeing what happened to your mother when she found out your father left for another woman when you were younger scared you, to trust someone so much you completely lose yourself when you realize they weren’t the good person you thought they were. You saw the way she slowly lost herself to the point you wouldn’t even consider her your mother anymore, she took her anger and resentment out on you and it wasn’t fair.
You never told anyone this, not even Yunjin. It was embarrassing to tell people you’re insecure when it came to love because of your father, the man who was suppose to show you what love looked like, what it felt like. When people asked it was always ‘he’s aboard for work and is never home’, mostly as a way for your mom to cope with the sudden change. 
“Y/N what are you talking about me and Jieun are just friends, I can’t believe you’d think I’d cheat on you.” He hissed brows furrowed as the two of you stood outside of the park connecting your neighborhoods. The dimly colored sky reflects what you were feeling in your heart when it came to your relationship, a loss of hope. The only light you had in your life slowly dimmed as you spoke.
“Heeseung I’m not saying you did! But you don’t understand how I’ve been feeling lately and it hurts that you can’t understand where I’m coming from.” You clutched the hem of your uniform feeling the burning sensation lining your eyes. You have yet to mention to Heeseung the finalizations of the divorce and how much of a toll it’s taken on you on top of the tremendous amount of school work you were given as you prep for college entrance exams. You knew your problems were minuscule to others, everyone had their own problems what made you any different? 
“Because it makes no fucking sense!” he exclaimed causing you to stumble back mouth slightly ajar from being shocked. 
“Gosh do you know how suffocating it is when all you do is worry all the time? We aren’t 10 anymore Y/N stop acting like it.” He huffed rubbing his face with his hands before dropping his duffle bag on the floor. 
It angered you how he didn’t think he was at fault in this situation at all, sure let’s say your eyes deceived you, but it still didn’t justify Heeseung getting upset at you right now, how would he have felt seeing you in that position you thought, maybe he wouldn’t care. You replayed the moment when you decided to slam the door to his class shortly after throwing the banana milk you bought him in the trash as you told the both of them to have fun together. 
He’s changed, you saw it and you were sure he did too. From the way he slowly excused himself from walking you home in the evenings to being able to finally see the main cause of the distance growing between you two, it was enough. You were tired, tired of feeling invalidated by your own feelings, tired of feeling like you were just a rerun of your parents' failed relationship that ended long before you knew.
Breaking your gaze away from his huffing body you gulped and focused your focus on the bus stop that was filling with people.
“Let’s break up.” you softly stated feeling the burn rimming your eyes as you clenched your fist.  From the corner of your eye, you could see him turning towards you with his expression dropping as it grew quiet. The sound of cars passing by filling the void that was increasing between you two.
“What?” 
When you didn’t reply it caused him to scoff shaking his head in disbelief. 
“You know what maybe she was right, we were better as friends.” He picked up his duffle bag his words laced with venom. 
She? 
“What did you just say?” You turned towards him brows creasing in anger as the facade you hoped stayed slowly broke. A small tear fell down your cheek without you knowing as you stared at him not believing what you were hearing. How did things turn out this way, usually when the two of you fought it always ended with the both of you coming together, sharing sorrys and ‘I’ll do better’.  Shaking your head you quickly wiped your cheek noticing the way he couldn’t even look at you after saying that bullshit. 
“Fuck you Lee Heeseung.” You cursed causing him to bring his gaze up to you finally, you failed to notice his hurt eyes as you were too busy filling yours with tears. You couldn’t see it but Heeseung was trying to hold in his tears as well, he understood you were upset because of the misunderstanding but to break up with him because of it left him upset and devastated, he didn’t know what else to do so he hit where it would hurt the most. All he could do was watch as your figure turned to rush towards your neighborhood, shoulders showing that you were crying. 
Finally realizing what happened he brought his free hand up to wipe his tear-stained cheeks mentally beating himself up for what happened as he let his anger get the best of him.  “Shit I fucked up…” he cursed taking a seat on the bench near the park. He didn’t mean it, everything he said he didn’t mean it, and he could only hope you knew that as well.
“What do you mean Y/N moved?” Jake exclaimed at Yunjin who sat expressionless at her desk, a sad ambiance overtaking the group of friends. It’s been over a week since the two of you broke up, you made sure to ignore him in the halls and he whose ego was too big for his own good did the same. The news of you moving shocked him and shocked everyone. You never told them you were planning to move so when Heeseung heard the news at the same time as everyone else it pissed him off. 
“Dude what..” Jay groaned in disbelief slouching back in his seat as he began scrolling through his phone to find your number, no answer.
Heads turned towards Heeseung as it was known by now the two of you broke up, but to say you moved because of it made it feel like it was his fault. The group grew silent as the news spread like wildfire. Classmates start talking and word gets around causing information to finally pour out. 
“Did you know her parent’s divorced because her dad’s a cheater?”
“What no way! Is that why she moved?”
“I’m not sure I heard from my mom her parents haven’t been together for a while, most likely they just settled their divorce and she just had to move.” 
Everything just clicked in his mind, how you changed after he suddenly became friends with specific crowds of people (which he can understand), or how you always needed reassurance randomly throughout the relationship. The way the topic of your dad and your home life was always brief and sensitive in your friend group it all made sense. Is this what you meant that day when you said you were going through things he wouldn’t understand? Or how you would weirdly ask him if he was happy with your relationship sometimes when you were visibly feeling down or quiet. He never took these as signs which only made him feel even more guilty.
Heeseung never minded that, he loved you and he wanted you to feel loved regardless if it was through words or actions. You always made him feel loved, from the way you looked at him when he spoke about things he was passionate about, to the way you would always back him up when he was frustrated about school or home problems with his brother and overbearing expectations. From the little things to the big, you were always there for him, for each other. 
It was just a bad week for him with his studies piling up on top of soccer practice that tired him out, he never meant to take his frustrations out on you. The side job he decided to take on after school to earn extra money to buy you a birthday gift limited your walks home he knew you cherished so much, but you didn’t know. So when you came to him accusing him of everything not only did it break his heart but it made him angry, angry because he felt like he wasn’t treating you enough that you concluded he lost feelings for you.
With the short period the two of you were separated, Heeseung genuinely thought he was going insane, the emptiness that filled him physically and mentally made things way more difficult for him. Your excited smile when you’d see him in the halls and during breaks were no longer visible nor were your encouraging words of motivation when you would send him off to practice on days he wanted to go home or quit. You no longer gave him your loving gaze when you would watch him study or when you watched him tussle with the guys, none of it was here anymore. He wished he could take it all back, maybe talked to you a day or two earlier but it was too late.
 “I fucked up so bad…” he whispered out loud bringing his face to his palms as his shoulders slouched when a whimper escaped. Despite his friends comforting him and reassuring him it wasn’t his fault, nothing was going to bring you back to him. 
You left and he couldn’t do anything to fix it.
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“Yunjin I don’t know if I can do this.” You whined feeling your heart beating through your chest as the two of you stood in front of the restaurant everyone decided to eat at for tonight's dinner. 
“Okay I’m not gonna lie to you, they might be upset with you at first, especially Niki but the moment they find out you’re transferring they’ll be ecstatic!”Yunjin exclaimed smiling as your frown turned into a soft smile. 
Niki who always followed you around and did everything you wanted to do. Niki who always made sure to sit next to you at lunch and made sure his Heeseung hyung always treated you right day to night, he was like the little brother you wish you had. You missed the kid, especially with the three youngest finally enrolling in Uni you were really about to see everyone again. 
You were anxious, having not seen any of the guys in over 2 years you felt like throwing up. You were excited but also scared, what if they didn’t want to see you again? They were Heeseung’s friends before yours after all, you knew Yunjin was only being encouraging and wanted you to be comfortable before the semester started but you weren’t so sure about this one.
“Yunjin over here!” You could hear Jake exclaiming as he raised his arm in the air for her to see. 
Clutching your bag you followed closely behind your best friend thanking whoever the hell made her way taller than you to block your small frame. From what you noticed it seemed to be a class dinner as students filled the place with laughter and conversation, some of which you recognized and their eyes widened when you greeted them with a small smile.
“Yo what took you so long we already ordered and everything,” Jay asked as he was seated at the end of the table still browsing the menu. From the corner of his eye, he saw another pair of shoes standing directly behind Yunjin and curiously looked up only to catch your gaze staring back at him with a small grin. You can see the way his eyes widened before trailing over your body almost trying to see if you were really there.
“No fucking way.” He cursed causing everyone to stare at him confusingly. 
“Before you all attack me for being like…4 minutes late,” Yunjin rolled her eyes as she turned around and grabbed your elbow making you step up from behind her stature. Quickly she threw her arm over your shoulder before pulling you in for a side hug. 
“Surprise!” 
You nervously gazed across the table to see all the guys stare at you like a group of deers caught in a headlight. 
“Surprise?” You brought your hands up with a shy smile on your face. You’re not really sure what to say or how to even act not wanting to cause trouble and whatnot, thinking they were upset you showed up. Yunjin must have felt your anxiety and squeezed your arm slightly as she too was confused as to why no one was saying anything, she was sure everyone would be screaming by now.
“Y/N!” Jake jumped up rushing over to you with his big smile arms open for a hug. With a sigh of relief, Yunjin released you from her grasp allowing you to hug Jake who engulfed you in one of the tightest hugs you’ve ever received from someone. 
“Hi Jakey.” You greeted him with a smile as he pulled back to get another look at you. 
“What’re you doing here?” He asked as his eyes twinkled seeing you right before him, he couldn’t believe it. Before you could answer Sunoo and Jungwon came up to greet you excitedly as you could still see Sunghoon sitting in his spot just staring at you with his eyes wide as you waved at him once he smiled. 
“Y/N I can’t believe you’re here!” Sunoo quickly asked you to sit down making sure you sat in the middle of the seating arrangements with Jake and Niki beside you and Sunghoon in front of you. As you sat down you saw him. 
In a way, he hasn’t changed and in a way he did, you could barely recognize him, not only was he taller and more built but his once messy boyish hair was styled to show his forehead. But his doe eyes that looked up at you still were the same, although a little more distant you still saw the boy you met in high school in there somewhere. His gaze sent heat through your cheeks as you gave him a small smile and nodded before sitting down. 
“Where did you go that you didn’t even bother to tell us? Much less keep in contact!” Jay scolded taking a sip of water from his tin cup. Rubbing your palms on your thighs you gave him an apologetic grin before taking off your jacket and setting it behind you.
“Well I moved with my dad overseas after my parents finalized their divorce, it was a hard decision and last minute but I had no other choice.” You explained remembering the abrupt decision you decided to make when your mother wasn’t deemed suitable to take care of you anymore. Even though he was seated near the wall next to Sunghoon you could see the sigh of relief Heeseung let out once you explained the reason why you left and why you couldn’t keep in contact with them. 
“Still you could’ve at least said something.” Niki sulked looking down at his plate beside you. Noticing the small frown on his lips you brought your hand up to rub the nape of his neck showing you were sorry with a small grin. You giggled when you noticed his ears turning red noting that never happened when you did it to him before, you wonder what changed. 
You were glad Yunjin decided to drag you out tonight, it was bound to happen one way or another but you were glad it happened. You couldn’t remember the last time you laughed so much and so care-freely. From time to time, you would glance at Heeseung either to see him laughing with the others or looking down at his phone causing you to wonder if there was something or someone he was wanting to see pop up. But you shook those thoughts away as Jake would usher you to eat mentioning how your cute cheeks were gone and asking if you haven’t been eating well.
Although you didn’t notice, Heeseung had been stealing glances at you from secretly, not really, the whole dinner. If you were surprised to see how much he’s changed he was just as surprised if not more to see how much you’ve changed. 
Not only were you more confident as the way you presented yourself showed that, but you also looked more mature. Like Jake had mentioned he noticed your cheeks weren’t as round as before and your hair has grown way longer than the shoulder length you had in high school. Your style was different and he noticed the slight glitter under your eyes that twinkled every time you smiled or laughed. The way you spoke with your hands gesturing and adding to your story and words was still a habit you didn’t change. Neither was the way you would always push your hair behind your ears ever so often when you spoke. You were still so beautiful to him and that never changed. 
He was relieved when you explained the reason why you left but he wondered if things didn’t turn out the way they did back then or if he reached out to talk to you sooner if you would have stayed. Feeling a slight kick under the table he looked up with his brows furrowed to Sunoo side-eyeing you as you spoke with Jay and Sunghoon about your overseas experiences. Heeseung glared at the younger male before shaking his head and looking down at his plate. He couldn’t. 
How could he possibly find the opportunity to pull you to the side to talk to you about what happened? Tell you how beautiful you still were or that he missed you so much? Explain to you how he still loved you after all this time hoping and waiting that you’d somehow show up whether it be in his dreams or front of his apartment. He couldn’t. There were so many unanswered questions that weren’t answered. Were you staying for a while? Were you seeing someone else? Do you still think about him the way you cloud his thoughts at night? He couldn’t. He was scared. 
“Y/N? No way you’re back?” You turned around to see Soobin who stood behind you as he shoved his phone back in his pocket coming from where the restrooms were. 
“Soobin!” You stood up giving the taller boy a hug which he returned happily, a little too happy Heeseung thought as he rose a brow up at the two of you. 
“I’m here with the guys they’ll be so excited to see you!” He mentioned his gaze falling behind the group behind you almost like asking for permission. Before you could answer Yunjin stood up and pushed you towards Soobin ushering you to go say hi to your classmates. “She’ll be back soon don’t be selfish…we aren’t the only ones who missed her since she’s been gone.” Yunjin shook her head at the disapproving looks from the boys. After a while they noticed you coming back to their table with a bright smile on your face.
“Have fun?” Jake asked causing you to nod at him happily as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, unknowingly causing Heeseung to tense knowing how affectionate his friend got after drinking.
“Yeah, they asked me to hang out next week after classes start!” You huffed out taking a sip of your water from talking so much in the past thirty minutes. Not only did you say hi to Yeonjun and Beomgyu again, you also greeted a lot of your other classmates who stopped to say hi. 
“What?” Sunghoon questioned, pausing mid-sentence as the piece of meat he was about to eat laid neatly between his chopsticks. You took a sip of your drink before coming to a hault almost choking as you realized you never shared the extra exciting news.
“Surprise! I transferred back!” You once again brought your hands up your cheeks burning from the alcohol you drank at the other table. 
“Yep and she’s staying with me!” Yunjin added taking another shot before slamming the glass down causing everyone to laugh. After a few more rounds everyone decided to go back to the guy’s shared house after inviting the other classmates that were around for a kickback.
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“I’m gonna get some fresh air.” You informed Yunjin after a heated game of vodka pong, yeah vodka pong. Waving your hands to your face you opened the balcony door stepping out to cool down before you were thrown into another dangerous game. 
Sitting down on the couch that was for some reason placed on the balcony you laughed at how oddly upset you felt. Heeseung has yet to say anything to you directly besides asking if you wanted a drink when you were at their makeshift bar. You were glad you won the vodka pong but most of your shots came from when you noticed Heeseung talking and laughing a little too loudly with some girls you didn’t recognize. You didn’t care, that’s what you convinced yourself at least. Besides, it wasn’t like you could just suggest starting over friends or not, you ended things first. 
“This is so annoying.” You whined to yourself stomping slightly on the wood failing to notice the balcony door sliding open and closed.
Closing your eyes you leaned back you before hazily opening your eyes feeling at a cooling sensation against your left cheek. 
“What’s annoying?” Surprised you watched as Heeseung took a seat beside you opening the cold bottle of water handing it to you before he laid back whispering for you to drink. Thanking him quietly you were surprised when you chugged half the bottle in one go. It was quiet, the bass of the music radiating through the walls of the house added to the sound of cars passing by on the street. It was dark but somehow the night sky still shined as the lights of the lamppost highlighted the small bugs that flew around toward the lights. 
“How’d you guys even find this place to buy?” your sudden question surprised him, he wasn’t expecting you to break the silence first but he was glad you weren’t completely acting like strangers but at the same time maybe you weren’t as nervous as he was.
“Jay found the place because it use to be a frat house and bought it off their hands, it's a good distance from the campus and off-campus utilities and activities. Plus there are enough rooms for all the guys.” He explained glancing at the Omega sign that was on the floor against the wall causing the both of you to snicker. 
“You guys are practically a frat.” you shook your head taking in the fresh air as a smile settled on your lips. He let out a disapproving chuckle as the two of you settled in the silence just a bit longer. You felt uneasy, it was a lot less awkward than you thought, a lot of unspoken words and emotions seemed to fuel the both of you as neither of you said anything as the air filled with the faint screams of Jake and Sunghoon from inside. 
You wondered how he reacted after you left finding out some of the other guys practically ran around asking your neighbors if they’ve seen where you and your parents moved to from time to time. Was your presence filled by someone else? While you were away you didn’t bother talking around with other guys, part of the reason being you were sure you were going to move back to Korea while a part of you knew it wasn’t right when you only wanted him. 
“How have you been?” His sudden question snapped you out of your thoughts as you turned to him noticing the way he had his head tilted to look at you. Something so simple yet it caused your breath to hitch, the lamppost light bouncing off his cheekbones casting a shadow over his eyes that were looking intently at you. Despite it taking a while for you to answer Heeseung didn’t mind, he could tell you were thinking by the way your eyes scanned his before settling somewhere on his face. He could practically see the gears turning in your pretty little head as he would put it. 
“I’ve been good actually,” you answered unaware of how long you were taking to answer him, you’d like to blame it on the alcohol but you knew that wasn’t the reason. Maybe it was the way he was still staring at you or the way his lips glistened after licking them slightly from before, you didn’t know anymore. “How about you?” You softly asked raising the bottle to drink again as you tried to focus on other things to not feel awkward. 
“Been better.” he quickly answered surprising you. Tapping on the bottle cap you slowly found yourself again turning towards him seeing Heeseung playing with the hem of the couch. You could see the bags under his eyes and his lips pursed slightly telling you exactly what you needed to know. 
“You’re tired though,” you concluded causing a small smirk to form on his lips, you knew you were right. You still knew him so well it made him happy.
“Yeah I mean classes have been kinda rigid, I’m trying to juggle learning python on top of my science classes and practice.” he shook his head with a sigh causing his adams apple to bob as his eyes closed with fatigue taking over his senses. You could tell he was tired but you were glad he had a moment to acknowledge it. You could relate, with all your core classes on top of your unpaid internship at the hospital last semester you were glad at least here you were paid to work long hours after countless studying trips to the library. 
Without thinking your hand reached out to fix the misplaced hairs that fell over his eyes. Realizing what you were about to do, you quickly retracted your hands knowing you had no right in doing so despite how much you wanted to. It was just something that felt natural.
You let out a slight gasp as his calloused hand softly gripped your wrist bringing them down between the two of you. Feeling him relax his grip over your wrist you couldn’t help but stare ahead to mask the blush you felt taking over your cheeks. You flinched feeling him suddenly sit up before trancing his fingers down your palm as he intertwined your hands together, a content sigh ghosting from his lips.
You could practically feel your heart beating out of your chest and it was the same feeling you felt when you and Heeseung first held hands in high school. The clamminess of your hands mixed with the warmth of his palms caused your mind to drift in a frenzy thinking about other possible ways he made you warm. It was suffocating you in the best way possible, the inability to breathe as the thought of what-ifs shifted through your mind. 
“Heeseung-” you were caught off guard not being able to tell him to stop as he pulled your enclasped hands across his body causing you to shift closer to him your shoulders now touching. 
Everything felt familiar, a comfortable familiar. 
Heeseung was your rock back then, when you needed any form of strength and support he was always there for you. You knew it wasn’t right to push your insecurities onto him and assume the worst, you were just scared and you wanted to tell him that. 
Feeling his head slowly lean against your shoulder caused all current thoughts of doubt and all sense of denial to fly out the window. After he realized you weren’t going to move away, he nuzzled into the crook of your neck and shoulder taking in the scent of lavender and mint he can remember so clearly instantly causing him to sigh. Feeling him grip your hands tighter you leaned into his touch resting your cheek on his head taking in his cologne you faintly recognize. 
“I missed this Y/N,” he whispered noting the way your other hand fumbled with the hems of your skirt. 
“I missed you so much.” your brows creased hearing the slight change of tone in his voice, he was sorry. Rubbing your thumb over his knuckles you sighed and rubbed your cheek into his hair causing him to look up to see your eyes already fighting to stay dry focusing on the lamppost down the street. 
“Heeseung there’s so much I want to say to you.” whispering as you gripped your skirt tighter voice wavering oh so slightly. Sitting up Heeseung turned his body towards you understanding you must have held a lot in, he wanted you to tell him. Yell at him. Tell him how much he messed up but knowing you, you’d somehow make everything your fault.
“I’m sorry for not telling you about my parents back then, I was just so embarrassed with the whole thing I just- I don’t know…maybe part of me didn’t want to tell anyone because even I myself didn’t accept it back then.” you started looking down at your intertwined hands noticing from the corner of your eye Heeseung nodding at everything you were saying, his eyes also focused at your hands. 
“I didn’t even know my parents were estranged until my dad came home and told me everything. How he found someone else while my mom was waiting at home hoping for him to come home. Later I was told to either come with him overseas or stay with my mom who was already not in a healthy mental state.” You sighed feeling the rush of consternation you felt hearing all this for the first time again. You felt Heeseung squeeze your hand and turned to see him looking at you with his doe eyes, pooling with so much solace you could feel yourself grounding again at the sight of them alone.
“I was just scared, scared that maybe we were like my parents. That I was clueless if you lost your feelings for me, I didn’t know. I guess my dad coming home to tell me to pack my bags the night before didn’t help that day either.” You tilted your head at him watching the way his brows slightly furrowed at your confession. 
“Y/N, we are nothing like your parents.” he shook his head brows furrowing deeper as he thought about what to say. 
“You loved me and I loved you, so so much you don’t even know.” He whispered gripping your hands with reassurance. 
“I should’ve just explained to you how Jieun was just asking me what to get Eunjoo for his birthday since they started dating and she knew I was close with him from the soccer team.” You recalled seeing the two together at the restaurant, throwing you a wave and a smile you made sure to return. God, you felt so stupid. 
“I should’ve talked to you right after everything happened and instead I let my stupid fucking ego get in the way and you left.” His voice shook looking at you finally. You shook your head you cupped his cheeks to bring his gaze up to you.
“It was my fault, never should I have made my insecurities a problem between us, I wanted to tell you but I just didn’t know how. The things that were happening during that time only fueled my self-doubt. I knew you had your own problems I didn’t want you to worry about mine until it was too late.” you whimpered feeling like none of this would’ve happened if the two of you just talked.Shaking his head in denial you could tell he was trying hard not to cry. The way his lips turned into a small frown as his brows creased deeper down his face, someone from afar would’ve assumed he was upset.  
 “I’ve never been so scared of losing something- someone, so much in my entire life. But nothing ever mattered as much as you did, so when you left it felt like you took a part of me with you.” He finally let his tears fall finding the warmth of your hands once again holding them within his palms. You couldn’t help but feel so stupid for what happened. Who were you kidding, missing him was an understatement, it became a habit for you. 
When you closed your eyes you saw Heeseung. And when you opened your eyes, you missed him.
He was right, you were nothing like your parents. He was proving you wrong with each sentence he was spilling out to you mindlessly. The both of you needed each other yes, but not in the same way your mother relied on your father to the point she no longer had self-preservation. Not the same way your father needed other women to fill the void he lost the moment he concluded he no longer found happiness in your mother. You needed Heeseung because he always encouraged you to do what made you happy, he made you feel worthy and loved, not that being with him deemed you worthy and dictated what it meant to be loved. That was the difference. 
“Heeseung please believe me when I say I missed you in ways even words can not understand,” you whispered feeling yourself fall into the comfort you missed so much. His words, the way he touched you and made you feel, it made you cry. 
Feeling his calloused fingers stroke your tears away you couldn’t help but sob even harder. You finally were able to tell him it wasn’t his fault, it was never his fault how you felt. 
“Baby don’t cry you’re breaking my heart.” He whispered faintly pulling you into a much-needed and wanted a hug. His strong grip on your waist never weakened, giving you the reassurance and warmth he wished he gave you before. Heeseung felt like he could breathe again, the guilt no longer ate him away at night when the silence filled his thoughts and reminded him you weren’t beside him, where dreams were the only place he could see you and your beautiful smile.
“I love you so much.” you managed to say feeling warm from the embrace and from the nickname you remember all too well. He still had this effect on you, and you missed it so fucking much. Your face nuzzled into his neck taking in his scent which made you smile pressing your cheek softly where you could. However you panicked, he wasn’t saying anything. You should’ve never said it. Everything was going well until you had to speak whatever came to your mind. 
You should’ve known better than-
“Say that again.” Pulling away slightly you looked into his glossy eyes as they stared into you, his lips slightly ajar as he caught his breath. Still, after so long, you never fail to take his breath away. The way your lashes clumped together from your tears to the way the slight glitter from under your eyes now decorated your cheeks making you glow. He thought he was dreaming, and to hear you say you loved him erupted so many hidden and pushed-down emotions he knew he should’ve let go a long time ago. He wanted to hear it again, he needed to hear it again. 
“I love you Hee.” there it was. 
Running his hands up your neck he rested his palms against your jaw taking in the tint of your cheeks as you licked your lips slightly at the sudden change in placements. He’s waited so long for this, waited so long to have you again in his hold, telling him how much you love him and now he was able to reach out and touch you without having to wake up and realize it was all a dream.
He figured you must have noticed the way his eyes were glued to your lips as he felt you tug on his jacket biting your lips in anticipation. 
“God I’ve been waiting for this for so long.” he drew a long shaky breath against your lips, and you couldn’t help but switch your gaze between his eyes and his lips, gripping the hems of his jacket to pull him closer. You wanted it as much as he did and he knew it with the way your eyes looked up at him dazed as the glow from the lampposts glistened on your tear-stricken cheeks.
“I know I’m not the best but I’ll love you with all my heart, I’ll take care of you.” He managed to whisper nudging his nose against yours gaining your attention again. You could barely hear the music booming through the walls as all you could catch was the fast sound of your heart and the slight jingle of his earrings as he moved to take in your expression. 
Slowly you brought your hands to cup his that were loosely holding your face making sure to take in the sight of him cursing under his breath as your lips slightly grazed against each other. Heeseung had to hold himself back, now that he had you in his grasp he didn’t want to let go, ignoring the way your eyes were pooling with desire he wished you were his again. 
He’d make sure that happened. 
However what he didn’t prepare for was what you were about to say, it caused him to bite back a line of curses for letting you slip away from him so easily those years ago.
“You have me, remember that.” 
Slowly leaning in, his eyes flickered to yours as if asking for permission, despite all the lovely words and gazes exchanged before. He was still that sweet boy from high school. Pressing your lips against his you couldn’t help but melt into his embrace, his arms protectively holding the small of your waist pulling you against him as your hands traveled up his chest to circle around his neck. 
He tasted like alcohol, bitter vodka mixed with a tint of juice. You missed this so much, the way he slightly nibbled your lip making you gasp as he took advantage to deepen the kiss. You felt so shy yet so seen, he held you so tenderly his eyes closed with his pretty lashes on display letting out a small moan as your hands made their way to his dark locks pulling them ever so slightly as your lips locked. 
Heeseung was going insane, you drove him insane. 
You were sweet, so so sweet. The taste of your lipgloss mixed with the bitterness that was left after your vodka pong game, it was all addicting. The warmth of your hands playing with his hair grazing slightly against his scalp made him pool to his feet, he wanted you so bad.You let out faint whimpers as he moved his hands around your waist pressing you against his chest as you slowly straddled him deepening the kiss even further. Everything tickled his brain in the best way possible. Breaking the kiss to catch your breath you looked down to see Heeseung staring up at you, eyes slightly hooded his mouth glossy with evidence of your kiss and transferred lip gloss. 
“You’re so beautiful Y/N.”
Wrapping your arms around his neck you placed another peck on his lips laughing at the way he snapped out of his trance shaking his head as he wrapped his arms around your waist burying his face in your chest. 
“Does this mean we’re together again?” You asked quietly noting the way his eyes sparkled looking at you. You could feel the grip he had on your waist tighten as he licked his lips a smile playing on his lips. He was so fucking handsome you had no idea how it was even possible tracing his features with your eyes.
“Only if you come to my games like you used to.” he finally said coming up for another kiss that you were about to reciprocate.You paused, however, when the balcony door swung open revealing Jay who looked a little too tipsy to be sober. 
“Oh god not this shit again, like I said before just because the two of you are fucking doesn’t mean we have to be the audience!”
“Wait but what if I-”
“Shut up??” he cut Jake off half flabbergasted and half disgusted as he pulled the boy back inside leaving the two of you laughing, foreheads touching as you shared one last kiss, for now at least.
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Enhypen Hyung Line Trope Series 
Main Masterlist
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sunohws · 2 months
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fuck you - choi yeonjun
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pairing: sub!yeonjun x dom!male!reader
synopsis: You find out Yeonjun has a degradation kink after an argument.
genre (w/tags): smut, minors dni.. degrading, semi-public sex, college au
word count: 0.8k words
a/n: yeonjun. i finally made smth for yeonjun. I CRIED FOR 2 DAYS JUST FOR THIS TO BE LIKE 800 WORDS. IM SO ASHAMED. I WANTED TO MAKE SMTH LONH AND UNFORGETTABLE FOR YEONJUN BUT I CANT CUS I GET FRUSTRATED..
im sorry its so short..
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"You are so annoying, you know that?"
"Maybe you should cry about it."
"I don't know how you're even allowed to walk into this fucking college with that peanut brain."
"No swearing please Mr. Kim!" The teacher piped in, though she knew both students were much too caught up in their argument to listen to anyone.
"Oh my god, did you get any love as a child?"
"Apparently much more than you did."
"What shoes your mom got on?"
"Are you trying to get killed?"
"Try, you fucking lunatic."
"I'm not all bark like you are Babyboy I don't recommend saying shit like that."
"Oh, I'm so scared."
"Mr. Choi and Mr. Kim, would you please sit back down? I'd like to continue my class."
The looks she received was enough to nod her head and sit herself down, letting them continue. The entire class even looked entertained.
"You are just so entirely pathetic it's hard to even look at you."
"Oh really?"
Yeonjun looked a little taken aback, spitting out a "yes? you're so hopeless." You gave him an amused look, challenging almost. You leaned down, face coming terribly close to Yeonjun's ear so that no one else could possibly see what you were saying.
"Then why are you hard?" You whisper, lingering there for a second to watch Yeonjun's face go red. He sat down, faced forward, and told the teacher to continue with class. "Finally." She huffed, carrying out the lesson. Yeonjun put his head down on his desk, realizing he was actually hard. 'What the hell,' he thought.
He heard you laughing quietly, you were way too amused by this situation. Soon class ended, and Yeonjun was too embarrassed to say absolutely anything as he tried to silently leave the class. He checked to make sure you weren't following him, then slipped into an old janitor's closet. 'God I wish there was a lock on this fucker.'
He tried to go behind some buckets and such against the wall so if anyone did enter, he wouldn't automatically be caught. Yeonjun attempted to quietly palm himself, using majority of his brain power to not think about you. Maybe he really liked arguing. Maybe he really liked being littered with insults by a very gorgeous boy with rings and piercings and a soothing voice.
"So, yeonjunie has a degradation kink, hm?" Yeonjun's eyes flew open, seeing you standing tauntingly in front of him. "I don't have a-" You moved forward suddenly, flicking Yeonjun's chin up to meet your eyes. Your knee pressed in between his thighs.
"I really never took you for a slut, you know? You can't even stop yourself from moaning my name." Yeonjun choked on a moan, his head rolling back against the wall. "It just happened, okay? I would never like you like that you fucking creep" Your knee pressed against him more making Yeonjun's eyes roll to the back of his head.
"You seem to be enjoying this a lot." You leaned in further, "Are you okay with this?" He eagerly nodded yes of course, finally admitting he wanted it. "Tell me if i go too far, please." You pulled Yeonjun forward to connect their lips, bringing their bodies as close as possible to each other.
Yeonjun grabbed at your hand to force it onto his own throat, you got the message and lightly gripping his throat. You brought your other hand to palm at Yeonjun's dick that was still hanging out for some reason. Yeonjun whined loudly, his head banging against the wall roughly every time he threw it back.
"You like pain too, hm, whore?" You said against his skin, biting on the soft flesh. Yeonjun couldn't stop shivering and groaning. You slowly lowered yourself onto your knees, starting to pump at the base. "How pathetic, you're so hard for me?"
Yeonjun moaned purely at the words; tears were streaming down his face already from the stimulation. "Do you want me to suck your sad little cock, hm?" He nodded vigorously. "Words, Yeonjun."
"Yes, please! please y/n" He choked out. You slowly put the entire length into his mouth, Yeonjun rendered speechless as the moan was caught in his throat. You started to go faster, bobbing up and down until you could feel the back of your throat being hit. You gripped his thighs harshly, using all your might to bottom out each time.
"Oh my- oh my god, im-" Yeonjun suddenly came into your mouth, feeling embarrassed and scared that you might not have wanted that. Though, you swallowed every drop possible, wiping your chin and licking it off while making eye contact. You liked the bittersweet taste. Yeonjun swore he could get hard purely off of that sight alone, but he was still trying to catch his breath.
You re-did the black-haired boys' pants, making sure he was clean and okay to go back to class. Yeonjun brought their lips together again for a slower kiss once you got up. 
"Fuck you." he spat, though smiling slightly. 
"Name a time and place." you laughed, smiling as he left the closet. 
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I FINALLY WROTE SMTH FOR YEONJUN...
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shaunamilfman · 3 days
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you look like my next mistake
summary: A series of encounters you have with your friend's mother, Shauna Shipman, over spring break. A/N: im aware the age gap is controversial. live laugh love milf shauna, however.
Without fail you always seem to be loudest when you’re trying to be quiet. Here you are, in Callie’s kitchen in the dead of night, utterly convinced you’ve opened every cabinet except the one holding the glasses– just your luck. You finally find the right cabinet and grab the first glass you see, wincing guiltily when it makes a clinking sound against the glass next to it. You finally make your way to the sink to pour the world’s loudest glass of water, taking a well-deserved sip.
You whirl around as you hear a slight rattle behind you, followed by a swift whisper of metal on wood. The first thing you see is the gleaming edge of the knife, reflecting the soft glow of the streetlight back at you. The cold steel of the blade provides a sharp contrast to the otherwise warm and inviting atmosphere of the house, sending a chill down your spine as you struggle to take your eyes off it. 
It was strikingly sharp as if it wanted nothing more than to cut you open and see what spilled out. Your thoughts are a blur as you try to understand the reality of the situation, glass shattering at your feet as your hand shakes too hard to keep a firm grip on it. The sharp piercing noise echoes through the room, finally breaking an otherwise suffocating silence. 
You feel like the walls are closing in on you as you finally manage to tear your eyes away from the knife, focusing on the shadowy figure in front of you. You can just barely make out the edges of her in the dim light, deciding without a doubt that this wasn’t Callie playing a joke.
You make a pained noise as the lights suddenly flick on, blindingly bright to your senses. You furiously blink your eyes as you take her in– Oh, she's kinda…
“What are you doing in my house?” A gruff voice asks, looking surprisingly unphased.
“I'm– Callie,” You choke out, eyes wide as she brandishes the knife in your direction. This bitch was fucking serious: you think she might actually slit your throat in her kitchen. 
“Friend of Callie's. From college? She invited me over,” You're quick to add, hands held up placatingly as you try to look as unassuming as possible. 
Shauna lowers the knife slowly as she gives you a considering look. Still, her guard is up and you don't trust yourself to be able to outmaneuver her if she changes her mind. Every cell in your body is screaming at you that she's dangerous, even more so than pulling a knife on you would indicate. 
Oh god, you were going to be on dateline. You try frantically to remember if you’ve ever lit up a room, but Shauna quickly interrupts that line of thought.
“Callie didn't tell me anyone would be coming over,” Shauna comments, voice unassuming and softer than you thought possible. Her voice is like a siren call, utterly enthralling. You couldn't look away even if you tried. She was strangely alluring, even as she held your life in her hands. 
“I can see that,” You say dryly, speaking faster than you can think. You close your eyes with a wince, regretting the words the second they leave your mouth. Your eyes fly back open at the sound of a quiet snicker, catching her lip twitching ever so slightly upwards as she stares you down. Finally, she relaxes, placing the knife back in the block as she smiles like nothing ever happened. 
“A glass of water, was it?” She asks, walking towards the cabinet and grabbing for what you presume to be a cup. 
“Yeah,” You choke out, heart racing through your chest as you watch her move easily around the kitchen. Your hands still shake faintly, breathing speeding up whenever she steps near a sharp object. You have the sudden urge to get the fuck out of there, nearly taking a step forward when she suddenly speaks up.
“Stop,” Shauna commands, catching you off guard as you flinch backward into the counter. You freeze, eyes wide with shock and confusion as you look at her. She glances pointedly at the shattered glass cup at your feet. You nodded sheepishly, feeling a little embarrassed at the intensity of your fear.
“You’ll cut yourself,” She chides gently, stepping out of the room to grab a broom. You feel oddly guilty about making her clean up after you, despite knowing that it was mostly her fault for drawing the knife on you in the first place. You think anyone would react badly to finding a stranger in their kitchen at 3 AM.
Would anyone threaten them at knifepoint? A voice in the back of your head says, but you steadfastly ignore that as she walks back in.
You stand ramrod straight as she sweeps the broken glass away from your feet, humming quietly under her breath. What was this woman's deal? The sudden change in her demeanor was disconcerting, and the humming was starting to freak you out.
You stumble a few steps away as Shauna finishes cleaning up the glass, watching curiously as she fills up the glass she’d grabbed with water. She takes a few steps closer as if to hand it to you.
“I–I’m not thirsty,” You say quietly, edging your way around the kitchen in order to not turn your back on her.
She rolls her eyes, holding the cup out insistently. “You came all the way out here for it, obviously you were thirsty.”
You shake your head nervously, giving her a panicked smile. “No, really I’m not–”
“Drink,” She interrupts firmly.
“Okay,” You squeak out, grabbing the glass and downing it as quickly as you can– somehow your throat feels dryer than ever. You set the glass on the table and quickly back out of the room, pausing as you hear her pointedly clear her throat. There’s an expectant look on her face but for the life of you, you can’t figure out what she actually wants.
“Thank you,” Shauna says slowly as if talking to a child.
“Thank you, Ma’am,” You say quickly, wanting nothing more than to get out of here. Her nose wrinkles in distaste as she shakes her head.
“Shauna,” She says after a moment, giving you a quick once over.
“Thank you, Shauna,” You repeat, finally fleeing the kitchen back to Callie’s room. 
You shut the door as quietly as you can, leaning your back against the door as you try to get a hold of your racing heart, You can hear quiet footsteps padding down the hall, stopping for a moment just outside the door, before picking up again as Shauna shuts the door to her own room. You breathe a sigh of relief, grateful that the moment’s finally ended. If asked you couldn’t say what exactly it was about her that made you feel so uneasy, but something about Shauna Shipman just didn’t seem…right.
When your counselor advised you to add a minor in your last year she went on and on about how good it would look on your resume. What she conveniently forgot to mention was the only time slot for the required class was at 8:30 AM. After begrudgingly dragging yourself to a lecture hall at a time that was frankly criminal, you're absolutely dismayed to realize your professor is defining the scientific method. As if having to take an intro course as a senior wasn’t embarrassing enough, introducing yourself to your freshman lab partner certainly sent it over the edge.
That wasn’t an entirely fair assessment, as you had grown to quite like Callie over time. Her standoffish demeanor had a certain charm to it, something that you quite enjoyed in a person. Still, the first time you'd missed class she'd quietly emailed you a copy of the day's notes without even being asked. It was a pleasant surprise: you hadn't even realized she knew where you usually sat. You'd noticed with no small amount of amusement that they weren't her notes– the handwriting certainly didn't match her lab reports– but you appreciated the gesture nonetheless. 
Thus began a fairly unlikely friendship. You ended up being the mom friend more often than you were comfortable with, but you figured that sort of thing was probably inevitable given the age gap between you. Besides, Callie was impulsive enough for both of you; There was no need to add to it. You swore you spent more time trying to talk Callie out of adding random chemicals to “see what happened” than you spent actually conducting the experiments. You swore you were going to let Callie blow herself up the next time she called you old and decrepit, however. 
You’d gathered from a few rather stilted mentions of home that she didn’t get along too well with her mom, especially after her dad had gone missing a few years back. So, it probably shouldn’t have come as such a surprise when she tried blackmailing you into coming home with her for spring break after she realized you had no plans. You’d appreciated the attempt, even as pathetic as it seemed, but you weren’t about to humor it. 
She’d seemed so defeated when you called her bluff that you eventually agreed to go as a favor. You’d tell anyone who mentioned it that it was for the promise of free food, but you knew deep down it was because of how sad she seemed as she looked up at you with her teary blue eyes. Almost immediately afterward you realized that she was manipulating you, but then it felt too late to retract the offer.
Besides, you liked Callie well enough and you doubted her mom could be that bad, right?
After your third failed attempt at waking Callie up, one that had ended with her smacking you with a pillow so hard you fell off the bed, you finally decided to venture out into the living room by yourself. You were pretty nervous at the idea of running into Shauna out there, given that her living room was a likely place for her to be, but you’d finally gotten hungry enough that you were willing to risk it. Leave it to Callie to sleep past 2 PM when you’d been threatened at knifepoint in her kitchen the night before.
Shauna gives you an awkward smile as you walk into the room, not looking like she cares if it seems fake along the edges. It wasn't your fault that Callie had apparently invited you home without telling her, but it seems as if she couldn’t help herself from holding it against you anyway.
“Hey,” She says gruffly in greeting, focusing her attention back on the book she was reading. 
“Hey,” You murmur stiffly, quickly passing through the living room to get to the kitchen. You keep yourself busy making the world’s slowest sandwich, carefully placing every topping to buy yourself as much time as possible. You tried your best to focus on the task at hand, but you could feel Shauna’s eyes on you as she glanced up from her book far more frequently than necessary. The tension in the room seems palpable, and it makes your heart race for more reasons than one.
You wince at the sudden sound of a page tearing partially as Shauna roughly turns a page, quickly looking down as you avoid eye contact. Shauna closes her book with a sigh, finally standing up and walking toward you. She leans against the doorframe while keeping her eyes fixed firmly on you. She watches you for a long moment, and you get the strange feeling that she's sizing you up. You get a sudden urge to stand up straighter, squaring your shoulders in an attempt to seem bigger. Her lips curl at the edges as she takes you in, the movement certainly not escaping her gaze. The silence stretches on uncomfortably between you until finally she speaks.
“So… How did you and Callie meet?” She asks, attempting a casual tone that doesn’t quite fit her. You appreciate the gesture as futile as it may be. There’s something inherently intimidating about her, even when she’s trying to appear nonchalant.
You clear your throat softly before you speak, “She’s my lab partner. We’re kind of friends, I guess.”
You grin sheepishly, rubbing at the back of your head and you cross the room to put up what you’ve grabbed from the fridge. “She’s really cool once you get to know her, you know?”
“Sounds like Callie,” She comments with a fond smile, casting you a sharp glance after a moment. “Lab partners? You don’t look like a freshman.”
“Oh, no. Just a schedule thing,” You murmur awkwardly. “I’m graduating this semester, actually.”
“A senior, then?” She asks. You nod hesitantly, a little uneasy with the direction of the conversation. 
“A little old to be hanging around Callie, don’t you think? I hope you aren’t getting too close…” She trails off, voice laced with warning. If you didn’t know better you’d think she was just trying to protect Callie, but a confusing hint of jealousy underlines the whole interaction.
“Oh, no. It’s not like that,” You rush to say, surprise coloring your voice. “We’re just friends.”
Your response elicits a scoff from Shauna, arms crossing against her chest defensively as she stares you down. “Friends, huh?” She repeats skeptically, narrowing her eyes slightly.
“No, I’ve never– I mean Callie’s a little young for–” You fall over yourself trying to explain your feelings in a way that doesn’t seem insulting, even if you’re a little unsure of how the conversation got here in the first place. You finally settle on “I mean she’s very pretty, but I don't think of her like that.”
Shauna’s lips twitch, fighting a smirk as you fumble over your explanation. She visibly relaxes as her guard seems to drop a little, shifting her weight as she pushes away from the doorframe. She hums in understanding, seeming to mull it over before saying, “Well, she certainly inherited some good genes from me,” with a hint of playfulness you’d previously not thought she was capable of. 
“That she did,” You say, not quite meaning to say it aloud.
You can't help but acknowledge that she's pretty cute when she isn't brandishing a knife at you– she's hot then– as you watch a faint smile grace her lips. There’s a thoughtful quality to her smile that unnerves you; Even as you walk past her to take a seat at the end of the table you feel like she’s deliberating on something, carefully weighing all of her options as she sits down next to you.
She inhales sharply as your leg brushes accidentally against yours, clearing her throat as she purposefully brushes her thigh against yours again. Your eyes widen as you glance away, taking a bite of your sandwich just to have something to do with your hands. The feeling of her leg pressing against yours is more intense than you’d ever imagined it could be. 
This… This wasn’t how you saw your spring break going. You think you might blow up your friendship with Callie over this, an idea that makes you sadder than you thought it would. Still, you’re not sure you could find it in yourself to regret it. Shauna’s fingers drum idly against the tabletop, betraying a nervousness you hadn’t realized was present beneath her otherwise composed exterior.
“Do you like all your classes, then?” She asks conversationally, not seeming all that concerned with the answer
You shrug noncommittally. “I’m just glad to almost be done.”
“That’s right,” Shauna says, nudging your leg again. “You’re almost finished, aren’t you?”
“Prefer to look at things one week at a time, I guess. It’s my last break from school so I’m focused on enjoying that right now, honestly.”
“Maybe we could… hang out. While Callie’s sleeping of course,” She suggests, seemingly out of nowhere. A long pause stretches between you, the silence filled with possibility.
“...I think I’d like that, Shauna.”
You almost choke on your food as a hand abruptly makes its way to your thigh, squeezing firmly. Your breath catches as you see the intent look on her face as she watches for your reaction. You nod slowly before glancing down, watching as her hand slowly ventures up your leg. You jump apart as you hear a door slamming shut, pulling away at the sound of footsteps padding down the hall.
Callie calls out your name in question as she peeks her head into the living room, a surprised look on her face as she sees you sitting with her mom. They share a look that you don’t recognize, a silent argument ensuing that you can’t quite make out. Callie finally scoffs and throws her arms up in irritation, walking across the room as she sits down next to you. The two of them glare at each other from across the table, with you sitting awkwardly between them.
Callie grabs the sandwich off your plate, taking a bite out of it before dropping it back on your plate with a crooked grin. You glare over at her as you reach out and quickly flick at her arm, stifling your grin at her cry of pain as you finally eat your well-deserved sandwich.
You listen awkwardly as the two of them bicker in front of you about your presence, trying to be too put out about the whole thing. You really wish they had waited until you weren’t in the room to go down that particular avenue of conversation, but it seems par for the course as far as this trip had gone. You almost miss the feeling of your cramped dorm room as Callie’s voice starts to rise. Shauna snaps something back that finally quiets Callie, glancing curiously between them as you finally tune back into the conversation.
Shauna has a smug look on her face as Callie glares solemnly at the table, eyes shooting daggers as a scuff in the finish. Maybe it would have been better had you gone to your own house: you’re starting to think that even dinner with your extended family would be more peaceful than this.
You send Callie a pleading look as she finally lifts her head up, her expression softening when she sees the look of desperation on your face. Callie stands up abruptly, carrying your plate over to the sink and then walking off to her room. You watch hopelessly after her long after the doors closed, mourning your escape route as she leaves you to the wolves.
Shauna leans her head on her hand as she leans forward about to say something before Callie walks back out of her room, thankfully fully dressed. She waves her car keys at you with a grin, and you spare no time to make your exit. You hesitate as Shauna calls out a farewell, quietly returning the gesture. You sneak a look back at her to find her staring directly back at you, a smirk gracing her lips and her head tilted in a silent question. You scurry back out of the room after an impatient-sounding Callie as she calls your name in an irritated voice.
You scroll aimlessly through your phone as you lay back on the couch, noting absentmindedly that the waters stopped running. You weren’t quite sure why Shauna wouldn’t take a shower in the master bathroom instead, but at the end of the day, it was her house. Still, it left you awkwardly waiting around in your pajamas until she was done with the shower. You didn’t even bother to look up from your phone as the door opened, content to wait until she’d made her way back to her room.
As the sight of wet skin fills your peripheral vision you quickly realize that Shauna’s made that decision for you. You drop your phone on your face out of shock, wincing as you fumble to turn the screen off. There are so many places to look at, and so few of them are appropriate to stare at. She’s got a thin towel wrapped around her that did little to hide her body underneath it, a slip of a thing that barely reached her mid-thighs. Your eyes linger on her thigh, just a hint of skin peeking through where the towel doesn’t quite meet. You follow the seam up, lingering on her hips for a moment before reaching her eyes.
Your smile is strained as you look up at her, far too focused on resisting the urge to follow the path of the water droplets trickling down between her breasts and disappearing beneath the edge of the towel. Each droplet becomes a fleeting torture, almost begging to be followed by your mouth as it drips down glistening skin. There was a fragile tension between the two of you, but you weren’t sure how willing Shauna was to break it even as she continued to dance around the edge of propriety. It wouldn’t do to be accused of perving on your friend’s mother on your second day there, even if the idea was so damn tempting.
“Just wanted to let you know the shower was free,” She comments, the smug lift of her mouth the only clue that she knows what she’s doing. 
“Thanks,” You mutter, staring up at the ceiling as you recline back against the couch. 
Maybe if you just pretend she isn't there… 
“Are you feeling okay?” She asks softly, making you squirm with guilt until– “It's just, you look a little flushed, is all.”
“Fine,” You say stiffly, eyes shut tightly lest you sneak a glance at Shauna's legs now that she's stepped closer. 
She makes a muffled noise that borders on a laugh. It probably is a laugh, but it gives her just enough leeway to maintain her air of innocence. She presses the back of her hand against your forehead, humming in feigned concern. “You seem a little hot,” She comments amusedly.
You groan, rolling away to bury your face into the couch cushions as you hide from view. You ignore the sound of her snickering all the way back to her room, quickly darting towards the shower the second her door closes. 
What a mess.
“This is a mistake,” You murmur, panting as you rest your arms on her shoulders. Shauna's heavy breaths against your ear are more enticing than you'd feared they'd be. 
“Probably,” Shauna agrees, her voice low and breathless. She huffs a quiet laugh against your ear, wrapping her arms tighter around you as her lips brush your neck. “I want you so bad.”
You inhale shakily, peeling her away from you to get a good look at her. You need the distance just to think, not trusting yourself to make decisions while her lips are attached to your neck. She sighs 
“We could stop,” Shauna offers, a hint of a smirk on her face as she stares down at you. 
She knows damn well you're not going to stop. You say as much and she just grins, a light look in her eyes as she shakes her head.
“Is that supposed to be my fault?” She asks. You glance down knowingly, eyes lingering on the exposed skin where her flannel has been unbuttoned, before meeting her eyes again. Shauna huffs a quiet laugh, shrugging her flannel off with a pleased look on her face as your eyes unconsciously follow the motion. 
“She'd be so upset if she found out,” You protest, with no real conviction behind the words. You just figure someone should probably acknowledge it aloud. 
Her lips meet your face, tracing a trail on your jaw as she makes an understanding noise. “Mm. I know,” She breathes out between kisses, pulling away as warm breath meets your ear. “But you taste so good.”
Her eyes meet yours, challenging and intense. She leaves the decision up to you but makes sure you'll have to look at her as you make it. You glance down, uncomfortable with the intensity of the moment but that doesn't persuade her. All she does is lean forward, filling the entirety of your vision as she gently holds your chin. 
Even knowing it was wrong, knowing how much it would hurt Callie, you still pull her closer for another kiss. Unable to deprive yourself of her for too long at a time. How could you turn down what was oh so freely offered? 
You get lost in each other for a long while, only shooting apart when Callie's door suddenly sounds down the hall. You stand up quickly, glancing into her vanity as you quickly unruffle your hair to the best of your ability. 
You stand in the doorway as you debate the option of abandoning Callie altogether as Shauna looks up at you from the bed, lounging back and propped up on her elbows with a smirk firmly in place. You can tell how much she loves the attention, almost squirming as your attention lingers on her bare chest. She looks you directly in the eyes as her hand starts playing with the button on her jeans, finally motivating you to get back to Callie before you do something you regret. 
… 
“This is a mistake,” You protest, mumbling the words in between kisses. You chase her mouth every time she pulls away despite yourself.
Shauna moans, tilting her head back to give you better access to her neck. “You said that last time,” She comments lightly, her hips rocking slowly against you in an enticing motion. Not that she needs it. She's enticing enough by herself: you'd follow her to the ends of the Earth if it earned you an amused twitch of her lip. 
You'd certainly betray your friend's trust for her, fucking her mom just two doors down from her own bedroom. You table the thought, quietly reassuring yourself that your friendship probably would have ended when you graduated in a few weeks anyway. 
“It was a mistake last time too, ” You mutter. Shauna lets out a breathy chuckle, resembling more of an amused sigh than anything else. 
When Callie had asked you if you wanted to go hang out with her and her friends today you had just rolled your eyes and joked that you didn’t feel like babysitting, knowing full well what you were planning to do with the empty house. The guilt you’d felt only grew when Callie sheepishly apologized for abandoning you all week, citing the weird relationship she had with her mom as she idly scraped at the dirt with the toe of her shoe while refusing to make eye contact.
“Maybe you should stop talking,” Shauna whispers, fingers dancing along the hem of your shirt. 
“Make me?” Shauna’s grin in response is absolutely wicked, and you almost regret saying it.
Almost.
… 
The scent of her perfume surrounds you, face buried in her neck as she traces nonsensical shapes on your back. It’s so warm where you're pressed together that you consider moving away, but decide quickly you’d rather sweat than put any distance between you. As if she could sense the direction of your thoughts she pulls you flush against her, fingers carding gently through your hair as she presses a kiss against the top of your head.
The two of you lay in silence, but you can sense an air of unease on Shauna's end. You know she wants to speak by her nervous shifting next to you, but she seems to struggle over exactly what she wants to say. “So,” She starts, clearing her throat. “That thing you were talking to Callie about the other day?”
You glance up at her and she must see the confusion on your face as she clarifies, “Your roommate?” 
Ah. Okay. Your eyes narrowed in suspicion at the question: You hadn't remembered Shauna being in the room for that one. Whatever. You wouldn't put spying on you past her. It was strangely thrilling. 
You're happy to retell the story, listening to Shauna's soft laughter whenever you get particularly incensed. She continues to ask probing questions which remind you uncomfortably of speaking to your relatives at Thanksgiving, all “How's school?” and “What do you want to do after you graduate?”, but it was endearing that she'd at least try. 
She interjects a story every now and then whenever it relates to the topic at hand, but she seems more than content to let you lead the conversation. The only personal information she really offers up is about her relationship with Callie's father, and even that was surface level. You wonder idly why she'd marry such a loser, but you figure that you're evidence enough that Shauna doesn't tend to make good decisions. 
Still, it was nicer than you thought it would be. Admittedly the two of you hadn't done that much talking during the time you've spent together; Understandable given the nature of your relationship. You found yourself more smitten with her than you thought you'd be, silently mourning the end of your time together when you had to head back to school in a few days. 
You grin as your phone vibrates, letting your pencil fall to your desk as you lean over to check your messages. Glancing at your lock screen you eagerly fumble to get your fingerprint read as soon as you see that it’s from Shauna.
I heard you failed your exam. LOL ??? Lots of Love. Callie told me about it.
You sigh.
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flnpushy · 9 months
Text
Classic Story...
all birth stories
My old Story: Anna's Birth Struggle Anna had recently graduated and was college bound. Being 18 was fun for Anna and she enjoyed the graduated life. Her boyfriend Tom was also looking forward to college as well, but the two would be separated as they had been accepted to different schools. On the final night before moving away for school, they spent the evening together. Alone. Three months had gone by since the two had been together. Things were going well for him, but no so well for Anna. She was sick most mornings, and just felt off. A couple more weeks went by before she finally called her mom. She told her about her morning sickness and other symptoms. Her mom asked if she had taken a pregnancy test. To that she answered “Are you nuts?” “I’m not pregnant.” A few more days passed, she finally gave in and took a test. The test said she was indeed pregnant. She didn’t believe it so she took another. Same result. She called her mom in disbelief. “Mom I’m Pregnant.” Anna said. “OH my goodness....” Her mother replied. “What about school?” She asked Anna. “I don’t know mom, I don’t know what to do.” Regardless her mom was actually very excited, but Anna was far from excited. She had waited years to go to college and now it was all at risk. She visited the doctor where they confirmed she was about three months along. Much to far to go back now. Anna Couldn’t believe it. A baby? She didn’t want to have a baby! She then had to let Tom know. She didn’t know how he would react. She was very nervous making that call. “Tom, Its me, Your going to be a dad.” Anna said. There was a brief silence on the line.... “Oh my god are you serious?!?” He said excitedly. “Are you mad.” Anna asked. “Of course I’m not mad, Im absolutely ecstatic.” “Why would I be mad Anna, Its my fault your pregnant!” He said. “Oh thank god your happy.” Anna said. “What about our schooling?” “Its ok Anna, we will make it happen no matter what, I’m here for you!” Tom said. Most days Anna had morning sickness and other issues. Pregnancy was not easy for her. Anna was a petite brunette. She was small overall. She has a small frame, tiny arms, and she was only 5 foot 2. She was still just a girl in reality, but she now was going to become a woman faster then she had ever imagined. She continued her studies as best she could. Eventually the ninth month had arrived. Annas belly was like a basketball protruding from her body. Anna knew she would birth at home as this was her wish. Her mom Mary had been preparing thier home for months. Everything Mary could afford to get she got in preparation for the birth. Finally summer break arrived and a very pregnant Anna returned to her home, and Tom did to. One morning Anna awoke early to pains in her belly. This wasnt unusual for her as the baby frequently moved around in her belly causing discomfort. These pains were different however. She felt around the top of her belly. She could feel a little baby foot squirming around within her. Anna was grossed out by the babies movements, she didnt like the idea that a baby was inside her. She was ready to be done, ready to give birth and be back to being a normal girl again. Anna prepared a breakfast and joined her boyfriend Tom on the front porch for a Saturday morning conversation. Tom asked how Anna was doing and knew that she was in some type of pain. “I think it may be happening.” Anna said “Ok honey, lets get things ready.” Tom replied. Tom prepared her bed with clean sheets and comfortable pillows. He also layed out towels in the bathoom and on the bed to catch fluids during the birthing process. A couple hours later Anna was in real pain, labor had begun and her belly squirmed wildly as the baby moved toward the birth canal. The contractions were sharper and shaper and it wasnt long before Anna was really hurting. She layed sprawled out on the couch, trying her hardest to bear
through each contraction. She was wearing a light shirt, bra, and panties. She fought the pain as best she could, but still yelped in pain with each contraction. Tom had read up on birth and was going to school to be a doctor. He figured this would be a good training opportunity.
“My poor baby girl.” Tom said, sitting beside her. Anna continued to struggle through the pain. Anna entered transition, this was the worst pain she had ever faced. “Oh my god, oh oh oh, help me, ahhhhhhh” Anna yelped. She continued her struggle. Till finally transition had ended. The baby was now low in her belly and engaged in her pelvis. “Ok its time to check your cervix to see if you can push.” Tom said Anna sat upon the bed and Tom inserted a finger to check Anna. “Good girl Anna, your right on the money, 10 centimeters!” “So now what do I do?” Anna asked. “Time to push that baby out hun!” Tom replied. “Im scared.” Anna said. “I know baby girl, but its so close to being done now.” Tom said. Anna endured another couple of contractions. She was ready to get over to the bed, but the next contraction brought a tiny gush of fluids. “Whats happening!?!” Anna shrieked. “Your water broke baby, The baby is coming now!” Tom replied. Anna and Tom went to the bed, Anna waddled as it was so strange to her having so much pressure between her legs. They arrived at the bedside. Anna took off her shirt, bra, and panties, then climbed into bed. “Wow look at my beautiful baby girl” Tom said. “You are so beautiful.” “Ok how do I do this.” Anna asked. Tom put several pillows behind his pregnant girlfriends head, he put an absorbent pad under her butt as well. “Lift your butt baby.” Tom said as she slid the pad underneath. “Ok now we wait for a contraction and you push.” Tom said. “I will teach you how to push.” Tom stated. Tom put a finger in her opening. “Feel my finger?” Tom asked. “Yes.” Anna replied. “Ok when a contraction comes, your push like your having a bowel movement right at this spot.” He said “Ok” Anna replied. It was time to put her newly acquired knowledge to the test. A contraction came. “Ok baby, pull your legs up toward your chest and push like your pooping.” Tom instructed. Anna pulled back her little legs and pushed. “Grrrrr.” she grunted out. She then stopped. “Good girl Anna.” Tom said. “Hold those pushes good and long.” Tom stated. Anna pushed again. “mmmmmm grrrrrr ahhhhhh.” She grunted hard. The contraction ended. “Good girl baby!” Tom said. “Now relax.” “How many pushes will I have to do?” Anna asked. “Could be a few minutes, could be a few hours babe.” Tom said. “A FEW HOURS!” Anna yelled. “Yes baby, pushing a baby out is a long process. Your young and small, The baby has to stretch you out to get free.” Tom said. “You will be ok. Just breath and relax.” Another contraction came.
“Ok baby girl, here goes.” Tom said. Anna pulled back her legs and grunted. She pushed good and hard this time, curling her little toes in protest of the pain. “Good push girl! And again!” Tom said. Anna pushed again and again till the contraction was over. “Ok babe, lets see what we can see.” Tom said. Tom used both hands to open her opening. He poked around a bit. ‘“Ok girl, heres a contraction, push hard.” He said Anna pushed with all her strength. “Ohhhh!!! We have something here!” Tom said. “I see something!” Tom said again. “We have a little baby head!” “I wanna see the baby!” Anna said. Tom grabbed a large mirror and placed in in front of her, she then pulled back her opening once more. “Ok push hard and watch the mirror” Tom said. Anna pushed, in the tiny little back of her opening a tiny spot of hair was visible. As the push stopped the spot went away. “Where did my baby go?” Anna asked. “Back in your tummy.” Tom said. “Why in my tummy, I want her out!” Anna stated. “Birth is a two steps forward, one step back process baby. The baby will come out a bit, then go back in a bit, remember she is stretching you out so she can get free.” Tom said. “ I want her out!” Anna said. “Honey, she will come out, you have to push her out. “ Tom said. Anna dropped her legs as the contraction ended. Tom grabbed more pillows as it was a struggle for Anna to push and hold her legs open. He put pillows under Annas legs to support them. Then another contraction came. Anna moaned as she pushed, she struggled and quivered. Her perineum however was starting to bulge a bit with each push. “I’m uncomfortable.” Anna said. “Change positions honey, you have the whole bed.” Tom said. “Try side laying, I’ll support your upper leg when you push.” Anna slowly moved from laying on her back to laying on her side. Her cute little Belly touching the mattress. Another contraction came. Tom supported her upper leg as she began to push again. Anna dug deep and bored down with all her strength, the perineum slowly bulged outward. As the push ended the perineum bulge disappeared. The contraction continued so Anna pushed again. Once again the bulge appeared, and then slowly disappeared as the push ended. “Good girl Anna, your making her move in there!” Tom said. “With every push your helping the baby escape from your womb.” Tom laid down first and let Anna lie down on his lap. He did this to comfort Anna and help her push the baby out. The mirror was positioned so that Anna and Tom could see the progress. Little did Anna know this was just the beginning of the battle. Another round of contractions Hit Anna. Assisted by her boyfriend she began pushing again. Anna drew back her legs and let out a push. She curled her toes as she pushed, her Tummy shook and quivered as she pushed hard to free the baby. Her perineum bulged as she continued to push the baby. The next push brought the bulge out further. It was becoming evident that the baby's head was close to the opening. A few moments later another push came over Anna. She strained and struggled, but her efforts were awarded. She pushed again, the perineum bulged farther this time. Anna continued to struggle, however she was about to be rewarded. As in her vulva, a tiny tuft of hair protruded. “Good Girl baby!” We can see that little Head! Tom said.
As the push came to an end the tuft of hair receded from view. The contraction ended. Anna relaxed in between the waves. Less than a minute later the next contraction started. Tom assisted Anna in drawing her legs back. Anna pushed with all of her strength. The tiny tuft of hair appeared in the opening once more.
“Reach down and touch the baby.” Tom said Anna reached down with her hand, and for the first time touched her baby's head. “Ewww its slippery and gross!” Anna said. Tom just laughed. The next contraction started. Anna Drew back her legs once more and pushed. The baby's head became slightly more visible this time. However as the push ended the baby's head drew back inside of Anna’s tummy. She was so close, but yet so far. When pushing she could see her baby, but the battle was far from over. “Ok baby girl, the next stage is the tricky one. The babies head will fight your perineum to get out. When you push the head will come out, but when you stop it will roll back. The perineum skin will hold the baby inside of you. You must overcome this skin to get the baby out.” Tom instructed. It was time for Anna to dig deep. Her baby's head was stuck in between her legs, and only she could free it. It did not matter how much assistance her boyfriend gave her, it was totally up to her to give birth to the babies head. Anna knew that Tom could not pull the baby from within her. It had to be done on her own. The next contraction came. Anna's Little body strained as she began to push. Below her belly the tiny baby Head was starting to emerge. It seemed so much more fluid in her. The head was more responsive to her pushing now. Even a tiny push had a reaction on the baby. Tom layed behind her and watched the action unfold in the mirror. He was so proud of what his girl was doing, and slightly aroused. Anna pushed again which revealed the baby's head once more, however as she stopped the head receded back in. The battle between baby and skin had begun. Every push moved the head into the opening, but at the end of every push the baby went back inside of Annas tummy. The battle continued. Anna pushed down hard, the baby responded this time, and the head protruded quite far. However with the end of the push the baby went back into her tummy. Anna made tiny moaning sounds as she pushed hard to free her baby. She needed a position change to see if she could push the head free in a different position. Lying on her back was obviously getting her nowhere as the baby continued to go in and out. She once again switched to side lying. Tom supported her upper leg as she pushed. The baby's head came into view then slowly rolled back in as Anna stopped pushing. The little baby head was not coming anytime soon. It's almost as though the baby preferred Annas tiny little Tummy. Anna continued to struggle, but the babies head remained firm in her. It had now been two hours since Anna began pushing. She had made good progress, but the babies head was still within her. The baby had made an appearance several times, but refused to stay in the opening. Anna's Young perineum skin just was not allowing the baby to come forth. Anna was becoming desperate. She wanted the baby out of her badly but no matter how hard she struggled the head would not come free. Still on her side she began to wiggle her tiny hips back-and-forth. “Good girl Anna. Move those hips, it may help her out.” Tom said. “Follow your instincts.” Anna resumed another push. As she wiggled her hips back and forth the baby's head started to make more headway. The tiny tuft of hair head become the top of the babies skull. A tiny teardrop shape was starting to happen. Anna's perineum skin was finally starting to stretch. “Good job baby girl, wiggle that tummy and get that baby out!”Tom said. “Uhh, uhgrrrm, ooh god, mmmmm.” Anna moaned as she pushed. Anna was getting tired And frustrated. It was time for an all out massive push. “Im going for it.” Anna said. “Hold me open.” Anna waited for the next contraction to set in, Tom held her opening below to allow more space for the babies head. Anna breathed in any gathered all of her strength. She dug her feet into the mattress, strained as hard as she possibly could and let out the biggest push she had
ever done. She wiggled from side to side as she pushed. The baby's had came far into the opening. The furthest it had been yet. Even a small portion of the babies forehead was visible. However at the end of her massive push, the babies went back inside the tummy. “Wow honey, I was for sure that would have her out!” Tom said.
“I dont think I can get her out.” Anna stated. “You can honey, I will coach you.” Tom said. Tom began the coaching. He came around from behind her to assist the perineum in opening. “Ok baby, hard push.” Mary said “1 2 3 4 5... “good let go.” Tom continued coaching her for another 15 minutes. The baby's head continued into yo-yo action. Slowly coming visible with the push, and receding back in with the end. Finally after a few more pushes the head was starting to come forth far into crowning. Even though the baby's head was starting to crown, at the end of the push the head was still receding into Anna's tummy. Tom continued to coach his girlfriend, but the head refused to come free. The perineum skin was still fighting to keep the baby inside. No matter how hard Anna pushed the baby continued to recede in at the end. Tom assisted her by pulling back the skin as she pushed. Anna was taking a real working over and Tom knew that she would soon tire to the point of exhaustion. “I cant get her out.” Anna said. “Ive been in the same spot now for 45 minutes and the head is still stuck.” “I know baby girl, you have worked so hard, your perineum is just so tight.” Tom said. The babies head remained in the vulva. Visible, but not able to get free of the perineum. “Help me, I cant get her out.” Anna wailed. Anna began to doubt, she had worked so hard, but with no avail. Tom had doubts as well, seeing his poor girl struggle was starting to make him wonder as well. They took a break for a few minutes and regained composure. “Help, help me.” Anna said. “There is nothing I can do to free the baby honey, you just have to keep going.” Tom said. Anna let out a tiny grunty push. The head moved, but barely. She pushed again. Once again the baby responded, but it was little effort against the tight perineum. The baby receded back into Annas tummy. Once again becoming clenched by the Tight perineum. It was time to take a break and give up for a while, it was becoming apparent that Anna was not going to be able to free the baby. She was simply too tired, and her skin too tight. Anna drew her legs together and the baby disappeared from the Vulva back into her tummy. Anna stood up. It was time to take a break and walk. The walking motion and the movement of her hips might help the baby get into a better position to get free. The baby now back firmly in the tummy made Anna upset. She had carried this baby for the last nine months, and now it was so close to coming out, but yet she was unable to get it out. She could feel the baby moving within her, she could feel it kick and struggle to get free of her tight skin. She began to wonder if the baby would actually fit out of her. Anna endured more contractions as she paced around the bedroom. She could feel the babies head just inside her rubbing the perineum as she walked. It was a strange feeling. After 30 minutes of walking around, it was time for the inevitable. Anna needed to starting pushing again. Anna returned to the bed with Tom at her side. She drew back her legs and began pushing once more. She breathed in and bored down, her skin bulged below. She pushed again, the skin bulged farther and the vulva opened. She pushed again, the head came back to view then slowly receded with the end of the push. The next contraction came. Anna pushed hard and the head came to view, as the push slowed the head went back. Anna was grunting will all her might to free the little baby, but it was stuck. The tiny head held tightly in place. She took a breath. The head slipped slowly back in. “Good girl Anna, it will happen, just stay with it.” Tom said. However after several hours of pushing Tom was starting to get worried she would not be able to get the baby out on her own. Secretly he was turned on by this. Anna kept at it though, pushing hard to get the head moving, then watching it go back inside. She knew she really had no other choice but to get the baby out. The morning turned in to afternoon as Anna continued
to push the baby out. The head had now been going in and out for two long hours. Anna had now been pushing for five total hours. Anna’s body was covered in sweat, and she was becoming very exhausted. “Tom, the baby isn’t coming out.” Anna said. “I’ve been at this for hours.”
“I know babe, but the head is right there in your opening, It will come.” Tom replied. “Yes I know Tom, but her head has been there for two hours!” Anna said. “Are you enjoying seeing me like this?” “No babe of course not, I mean you are quite cute when you push, but I want the baby to come out to.” Tom said. Anna returned to pushing, she grunted hard and long. The babies head was right there at the opening, but just refused to come out any farther. Anna tried and tried again to get the baby out but with no prevail. “Ok Tom, I’m throwing in the towel.” Anna said. “Your baby isn’t coming out.” Anna felt trapped by this. She had a baby stuck in her, she couldn’t get it out, she began to feel anxious. Her anxiety made her tense up. This made the baby retract back inside her. As the baby retracted her tummy got bigger. “Looks like your still pregnant.” Tom said. “Yes, but I’ve been trying to get un-pregnant now for hours!” Anna said. “Why did you have to put such a big baby in me Tom? Anna asked. “I’m not sure its a size issue, I think there is another complication.” Tom replied. Anna went to say something again but was stopped by a contraction. She pushed hard and the head moved out to its farthest yet. The head stayed in the opening for a few seconds before slowly retracting back inside. “See babe, your getting it, that was the farthest its been out yet.” Tom said. “Well ok, I’ll keep trying.” Anna said. Anna pushed again with the next contraction, the head came slowly into view. The babies hair was dry now, it had been in the same spot for so long. Feeling the head going in and out was starting to become natural to Anna. It was actually starting to become slightly pleasureable. She pushed again feeling the head push against her opening. She was becoming aroused. Tom noticed this. “Starting to like it babe?” Tom asked. “Well.... I mean I want it out, but the feeling.....” Anna said. Anna continued to work the baby in and out of her. The head would slowly decend and push her opening, then retract back within her. Anna continued this until she could handle the pleasure no more. Her body shook and quivered with pure sensation. As the sensation overtook her she pushed, her opening contracted in and out. The babies head did the same, however it wasn’t popping out as she thought. The tension of the contractions held the baby tight within her. “Ok Tom thats it, your baby is stuck in me and I want it out now.” Anna said. “Get this baby out of me or else.” “Ok ok, lets see whats going on in there.” Tom replied. Tom reached in Annas opening, he felt around the babies stuck head with his finger. He got around to the bottom of the head and found the problem. “Ok so first of all we have a hand here, and second of all the baby is face up.” Tom said. “Theses two conditions make birth just about impossible.” Tom then withdrew his finger. “I suppose I could pull the hand free making birth much easier.” Tom said as he took a step backwards. “Ok so do it then.” Anna said. “Nah your ok babe, Just keep pushing.” Tom said as he stepped farther away. “Are you nuts Tom!” Anna said. “Your just so cute when you push.” Tom said. “Tom I command you to pull that hand out.” Anna said straining to push. “You’ll get it babe.” Tom said.
“TOM!!” Anna yelled. Tom slowly sat back down at her side. Anna desperately reached down and tried to feel for the babies hand. She could get her fingers just inside, but her belly was to big to be able to reach far enough inside. She gave up and moaned in protest. “Good girl Anna, just keep pushing.” Tom said. “Oh I’m going to get you for this!” Anna said. Anna went to move toward Tom but was hit with another painful contraction. She pulled her legs back and pushed as hard as she could. “Mmmmm Ahhhhhh, COME OUT BABY!” She yelled. She pushed hard again. “OHH MMMM AHHH, COME OUT!” She was gaining traction on the baby, moving its head ever farther out of her opening. However the babies little hand was preventing escape. She pushed hard again, her belly covered in sweat. She could feel the baby kicking and squirming inside to try and get out. Anna put her legs up on the headboard of the bed and continued to push with all her might. She pushed on her belly with her hands to help the baby. But it wasn’t moving. The baby was stuck just prior to full crown. The forehead was visible, but the face had yet to come. “TOM!” Anna said. “Good effort babe, But your still pregnant.” Tom said. “Make you a deal.” Tom said. “Ok what.” Anna said. “If I can impregnate you again in the future, I’ll pull that hand free.” Tom said. “NO, I don’t want another one of your babies inside me!” Anna said. “Ok keep pushing then.” Tom said. “Quick tip, wiggle your hips.” Anna stood up and got on all fours. Then went into a squat. She pushed and wiggled her hips as much as she could. The babies head began to come forward. She pushed harder and harder, the head began to finally stay down. With the next push the face came forth. It retracted a bit with the end of the push. The next push was a struggle but the baby was moving. “AHHHH MMMM.” Anna grunted as she pushed. The head was coming slowly out. The babies ears started to show. The end of the push had the ears disappear back in, to Toms pleasure. “Good Girl Anna, just keep pushing.” Tom said. The baby was coming but it was also continuing to recede back at the end of the pushes. The next push was finally the one that Anna had been waiting for, with a epic push and struggle, the head finally emerged. It was a relief to Anna to finally have the head out. She wiggled and pushed again, the first shoulder popped free. With the next push the other shoulder and body slipped free. Anna was elated to finally have the baby out. She got to know the new baby, and allowed Tom to bond as well. “So, when can we have another Anna.” Tom said. “Don’t get any silly ideas.” Anna said.
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g3z0 · 1 month
Text
Ice cold secret P2
Tumblr media
P1 P3 P4
Summary: Sturniolo. Your rival once you take a step on the ice ring. You and Chris are both very good players of opposite teams and schools. But the college, you both look forward on getting a sport scholarship, only takes 1 person pro year. The only thing you want to focus on is hockey. But that isn’t as easy as it first seemed when you met Nick - the triplet brother of your rival.
Warnings: cursing, drinking, mentions of throwing up
-g3z0
I hate to be responsible.
Im surrounded by drunken idiots that laugh about everything and can’t take one single thing serious.
I wish I hadn’t agreed on not drinking tonight and being their driver.
„Im gonna grab a water.“ I mumble to Noah before walking into the kitchen of Nate‘s house.
I open the fridge and roll my eyes when I see that the whole fridge is only filled with alcohol. I lick my lips and close it again.
Suddenly a bright light blinds me, making me squint my eyes for a second. I blink my eyes open and look at Chris brother, a camera in his hands.
I smile a little and raise my eyebrows „what was that for?“ I question. He looks down at his camera, looking at the picture he just took „Chris asked me to take pics.“ he says, looking back up at me.
My eyes meet his. Wow - he got the same intimidating eyes as Chris and Matt. „what are you looking for?“ he asks. I frown at him and bite my inner cheek „hm?“
He smiles a little and nods in the direction of the fridge. „Oh.“ I shake my head a little and look away from him „water, or something. Just something non alcoholic.“ I mumble, looking back at him.
He nods a little „come on.“ he says, walking away. I don’t move for a few seconds as I watch him walk away „oh, okay.“ I say, following him.
He walks into the garage and opens the fridge in there, grabbing a water bottle out of it. He hands it out to me and I take it from him with a smile. „Thanks.“
He smiles up at me and closes the fridge again. „You don’t drink?“ he asks. I open the water bottle as I shake my head „nah, need to drive those idiots home later.“
He chuckles a little and leans against the wall next to me. „You don’t drink?“ I repeat his question before I take a few sips out of the water bottle.
He shrugs with his shoulders „nope.“ I nod a little „I’m y/n, by the way.“
Fuck, why am I so nervous?
He raises his eyebrows at me „not Wolfie?“ he laughs a little. I smile and shake my head, looking to the side. „Wolfie is just a stupid nickname people call me..“ I mumble.
„yeah, it is kinda stupid.“ he says. „Im Nick.“ I nod a little, leaning against the wall next to him. „You don’t play hockey?“ I ask, looking at him.
He shakes his head „did when I was a kid. Sports are not my thing.“ he looks up at me and meets my gaze.
I lick my lips and look away from him. God, his eyes. „So, you‘re like the photographer of the huskies?“ I ask, looking back at him.
„Kinda.“ he shrugs with his shoulders. „Can I see some?“ I mention to his camera. His eyes light up a little and he nods „yeah, of course.“ he smiles, going through the photos of his camera.
I lean a little forward to him to get a better view. The scent of his parfume fills my nostrils. Fuck, he smells good.
„They‘re good.“ I whisper as we look at his photos. „Yeah?“ he asks. I look up to look into his eyes „yeah.“
I realize how close we are actually and I swallow a little. We hear the garage door being pushed open, making us both look at it.
Jacob stumbles in, laughing. „Fuck, Wolfie.“ he laughs, shaking his head. I frown at him „what?“
He leans against the door and squeezes his eyes as he bursts out in laughter. I roll my eyes „what?“ I repeat.
„Ethan-" he laughs as he shakes his head „bro, he just threw up all over in the bathroom.“
I let out a frustrated sigh and push myself off the wall. I walk over to Jacob and grab his arm „get your drunk ass inside.“ I mumble as I pull him with me.
We walk back into Nate’s house and I let go off Jacob’s arm, making my way towards the bathroom. I push the bathroom door open and look down at Ethan, who’s hanging his head over the toilet.
„Fucking hell.“ nick mumbles behind me and I look at him for a second. I sigh and walk into the bathroom, kneeling next to Ethan.
„You okay, Buddy?“ I ask, laying a hand on his shoulder. Ethan lets out a groan „I don’t feel so good..“ he mumbles. „I can see that.“ I sigh, looking back at Nick.
Nick laughs a little and shakes his head. I smile a little and look back at Ethan. „We‘re gonna get you home, alright?“ I say softly to him.
„Mhm..“ he mumbles. I stand back up and grab him under his arms, pulling him up. He leans with his full body weight against me, making us stumble a little backwards.
„You really don’t know how to handle your alcohol.“ I shake my head and lay Ethan’s arm around my shoulder.
„Sorry-" I look back at Nick „I gotta get him home.“ nick shake his head and smiles „no, all good. I just wanted to leave, so..“ he says.
„Do you want a lift?“ I ask him before I even think about what I just said. I don’t have any more room in my car. „Uhm.. sure, only if that isn’t a problem.“ nick says.
I shake my head and walk past him, with Ethan in my arm. „No, it’s fine.“ I smile. „Im gonna get the others, just watch over him please.“ I laugh a little, placing Ethan against the wall.
He lets out a groan and leans against Nick, making his eyes go wide. I let out a laugh „guess somebody likes you“ I chuckle.
Nick shakes his head a little „come on, don’t leave me here with him.“ I shrug with my shoulders as I smirk at him „you‘ll survive a few minutes.“ I say before I walk back into the living room.
I get the rest of my team and walk back to Nick. Ethan’s arms are wrapped around nick torso as he has his head leaning against nicks shoulder.
I shake my head and laugh a little „sorry- he gets too touchy when he’s drunk.“ I mumble, pulling Ethan softly away from Nick.
„Yeah, I figured.“ nick sighs. We all walk to my car and I nod into the direction of the passenger seat „you can sit in the front.“ I say to Nick.
He smiles a little and nods, walking around my car. „I always sit in the front!“ Ethan slurs and I press my hand against his mouth. „Shut up.“ I mumble harshly.
Aiden opens the back door of my car and gets inside, Jacob and will sit next to him. Noah frowns at me „where am I supposed to sit?“ he asks. I roll my eyes and push him into my car „just get on someone’s lap.“
He lets out a groan and climbs over the other boys, sitting down on Aiden’s lap. „Owh!“ Aiden screams, pushing Noah away from him. „stop that!“ Noah yells back.
„Stop complaining or y’all can walk.“ I sigh, pushing Ethan into the car before shutting the door.
I get into the drivers seat and start my engine. „he’s fucking heavy.“ Jacob complains as Ethan lays over him and Will.
I roll my eyes and look over to Nick, shaking my head. Nick laughs a little and looks away.
I start to drive and try to stay calm with the fives boys in my backseat, insulting and screaming at each other.
After I dropped the boys off, there’s only me and Nick left in my car.
„Are you bossing them around like that on the ice too?“ nick chuckles, looking at me. I smile a little and shrug with my shoulders „kinda.“ I say, looking at him for a second.
I grab the steering wheel harder and clench my jaw a little. He needs to look away from me - he makes me too fucking nervous.
„The next one left.“ he says. I nod and turn left ar the next junction. „That house right there.“ I hear nicks voice as he points at one of the houses.
„Alright..“ I whisper, parking infront of his house.
„Thanks.“ he smiles at me as he unbuckles his seatbelt. I return his smile „you‘re welcome.“ I mumble.
He doesn’t get out of the car and we stare at each other for a few seconds. I swallow and he clears his throat „see you the next game, I guess.“ he says before he gets out of my car, pressing my door shut and walking to his house.
I let out a breathe and lean my head against the head rest of my car.
What the fuck.
-
„Don’t yell.“ Ethan mumbles as he closes his eyes, pressing his hand against his forehead.
I shake my head and let out a breathe „then don’t drink. You know we have practice the next day.“ I say sternly.
I feel like a father of 5 boys who went out drinking secretly the day before.
„Come on, give us one day off.“ will sighs. I roll my eyes and open my mouth to say something.
„Woolfaar!“ I get cut off from the voice of our coach, making us 6 all look at him. I bite my inner cheek and look back at my teammates.
„Get on the ice, I’ll be right back.“ I sigh before I start to walk towards our couch.
I hear the others groaning and sighing before I hear the familiar sound of blades on ice.
„Yes, coach? I ask, stopping in front of him. He smiles at me. „Johnson called me.“ he says. My heart skips a beat. „The couch from Boston university?“ I ask.
He nods. „they‘re interested in you.“ he says. I let out a breathe and smile „but-" he continues „they‘re also interested in Sturniolo.“
I lick my lips and nod a little. Of course they are also interested in Chris. He’s a great player. Great captain.
„That means you gotta convince them why they should take you, instead of Sturniolo.“ he says.
I nod again „I’ll get better before our next game-" - „next weekend.“ he cuts me off.
I raise my eyebrows „what?"
The next game against the huskies was planned in three months.
He nods, looking towards my team on the ice. „The couch of Sturniolo, Johnson and me had a meeting. We agreed that you‘ll play as many games as possible against each other, so Boston university can make a decision.“ He looks back up at me.
I nod again, looking down.
This isn’t enough time. If I really want to convince them I need more.
„Wolfie.“ coach says, making me look back up at him. „You got this.“ he reassures me. „Yeah- Sturniolo is great.“ he licks his lips „but you‘re better. And you know that.“
Do I know that?
I sigh „okay..“ I mumble. He lays his hands on my shoulders. „You‘re only focusing on hockey for the next few weeks, understand?“ he says.
I nod again „yes..“ He smiles at me „no distractions. Wolfie, this is going to decide your whole future.“
I swallow a little. It's not as if I already feel enough pressure.
He lets go off my shoulders. „Now get your ass on the ice.“ he says. I smile a little „yes, sir.“ I say, grabbing my stick and getting on the ice.
Nick’s POV
„Fuck!“ Chris yells, kicking against the lockers.
Me and Matt look at each other and both roll our eyes. „Chris, I understand you‘re stressed-" Matt starts but Chris cuts him off.
„No, you don’t understand shit.“ he breathes, running through his hair. „This is my future. I need to get this scholarship.“
„And you will.“ I say as I open my locker. „It’s not that easy, Nick.“ Chris sighs, leaning against the lockers.
„Y/n, is good. Fuck, he’s perfect.“ Chris groans, leaning his head against the lockers.
Y/n is perfect. But I don’t think me and Chris have the same meaning behind it.
„Don’t talk yourself down.“ Matt says. Chris shakes his head and closes his eyes. „Next Game is this Saturday..“ he mumbles.
My heart skips a beat as I grab my books out of the lockers, closing it after. „This weekend?“ I ask, looking at Chris.
He blinks his eyes open and licks his lips „yeah.“ he sighs, pushing himself off the lockers. „We‘re gonna play the next few weekends against the marauders.“ he shakes his head.
I look at Matt for a second before looking back at Chris. „What the fuck?“ Matt sighs.
„I know.“ Chris mumbles, crossing his arms in front of his chest. „so that the Boston university can decide between me and him.“
I feel guilty for being excited that I’m gonna see him again this Saturday. Fuck, this shouldn’t be happening.
„It’s gonna be okay.“ I try to reassure him. He gives me a weak smile. „I hope so..“ he mumbles.
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gwilymz · 2 years
Note
dry humping with stewy pleaseee 😳😳
what a beautiful idea to wake up to… stewy is so nervous for a business deal and he’s never nervous. he’s been pacing all morning as he’s been getting ready, complaining to you about how this deal would change everything and how stupid they would be not to take the deal. he’s putting on his tie when he breathlessly cards his hand through his hair.
“fuck, can you put my tie on for me?” he’s so desperate and nervous and so unlike your stewy. but god he looks good.
smells like musky aftershave and vanilla and his beard is freshly trimmed, glasses perched on his nose. he never wears them, but when he does you’re in fucking heaven.
you look up at him with doe eyes and he immediately shakes his head.
“no. y/n don’t.” he’s halfway kidding and you can tell by the bulge twitching in his pants; he knows that look. “i just got ready.”
you blink up at him, sighing as you even out either side of his navy blue tie. he looks down at you, how juxtaposed the two of you are. your hair is messy, eyes sleepy and cheeks puffy, wearing an old college t-shirt of his and you’re so fucking beautiful it actually upsets him.
he sits on the edge of the bed, his dominance peering out from behind shaky breaths and furrowed brows. “be a good girl and tie it for me.”
you nod, straddling him, focusing on knotting his tie. you’re hovering over him and he places his hand on the small of your back to push you down; his cock is hard and heavy in his pants.
he grinds you against it, pushing your panties to the side as you finish tightening his tie. you whimper and grab onto stewy’s hair.
“oh no, pretty girl i just spent so much time on that.” he instead holds your wrists behind your back and you moan, leaning forward for a kiss, for the feeling of those soft lips, the taste of spearmint and a morning cigarette.
he lets go of your wrists, wrapping a hand around your throat as you greedily grind against him, moaning into his mouth. he chuckles, palming your ass and moving your hips forward so your clit rubs against the more textured part of fabric next to his zipper.
stewy grunts as you nip at his neck and palm his cock, begging him to let you cum through claiming kisses and wandering hands and that lost look in your face that always happens when stewy is doing such a good job.
“oh honey,” stewy grabs your hair and pushes his thumb into your mouth; your tongue instinctively swirls around the digit. “good girl. you tell me when you’re gonna cum. don’t need you soaking my pants any more than you already have. i’ll take care of you.“
you nod, growing closer as stewy’s hands roam to your hips, so big and strong and assured. you gasp into his mouth, moving faster and stewy groans, moving his hand down; he can tell you’re about to cum.
“please-i need—im gonna,” you nod and stewy coos in your ear.
“oh, sweet girl you’re gonna have to use your words.” stewy loves to taunt and tease.
“please—i’m cumming-“
stewy doesn’t have time to stop it; you grind against him faster, mouth ajar and eyes glassy as you moan his name into his mouth, feeding into his own pleasure.
you grip onto his collar and he grabs your wrists as you come down, pulling you off of him.
“fuck,” he is red in the face. “jesus fucking christ you were going to make me cum in my pants.”
you giggle, hair disheveled, breath uneven.
stewy’s glasses are a tiny bit fogged up; his hair is mussed and his collar wrinkled.
“youre sucking my dick when i get this deal.” stewy readjusts his tie and cleans his glasses, pulling you up for a kiss. “god, you fucking own me.”
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jcbbby · 1 year
Note
dani, i'd like to make a request. As someone who also struggles with ED, can you make a gic where reader has an ED and is went through a recovery? I mean, some years ago i was really underweight, i went through a recovery but my anorexia is still in there. and sometimes is hard to look at the mirror and see how my body changed, is hard to see that i kinda have a tummy now, see that my panties squish a little bit on my waist, see how my thighs look bigger... also my ed gave me stomach problems, i feel so much pain sometimes and it is hard to eat. reading fanfics where my favs comfort me about my body is my favourite thing to do when im feeling bad about myself. can you write one where said scenario happens with reader? (jamie x reader)
oh, bby :( I feel for you, I relate so much. I think anyone who has struggled with an eating disorder knows that it never really does totally go away. you just sort of get better at not acting on those intrusive thoughts. but I do want to make sure you know how PROUD I am of you, because nothing is more badass than waking up every day and still choosing recovery, regardless of what that voice in your head is saying. I love you, I'm rooting for you, and keep kicking ass you beautiful being!! <3
I know this is a little short, but I hope this fic brings you comfort when you need it. <3
Warnings: vague description of an ED and talk of body dysmorphia.
-
It was a gorgeous evening as you and Jamie were out to dinner on the Italian Amalfi Coast; a much needed vacation for the both of you. Your food arrived and Jamie immediately dug into his meal. You, however, stared for a moment at the plate of pasta in front of you as you held your fork, thinking about the couple pieces of bread already in your stomach. Jamie looked up from his food, giving you a small, encouraging smile, but letting you decide to take your first bite on your own time, not wanting to put any stress on a typical dinner that should be just that: dinner. You returned his smile, slowly twisting some linguine around your fork and bringing it to your mouth.
You had had a complicated relationship with food, exercise, and your body for a while before you started dating Jamie. They began shortly after you started college, the constant stress and change of environment had you neglecting taking care of yourself. These habits never went away once you graduated, and you carried them with you even when you met Jamie. This could have easily been shrugged off and flown under the radar to most but being thrust into the public eye exacerbated it all. There was an insane added pressure now to always look good, and more daily stress that came with traveling, planning things around filming and travel, and your own career.
When Jamie started to notice how the light in your eyes started to fade, he begged you to seek help. He told you how much he loved you and how much you deserve to feel the love he has for you, for yourself. And he was right; you knew you deserved more than what you had been giving yourself. He was with you through everything after that; your therapy appointments, doctor appointments, your treatment program, your entire recovery. Always supporting you, listening to your feelings, never making you feel like a burden, and doing whatever he could to keep you moving forward.
“Oh my god, this is so good.” You closed your eyes as you chewed.
“Damn right it is.” He smiled, trying not to show just how overwhelmed with pride he was watching you enjoy yourself eating again, allowing yourself one of life’s most simple of pleasures.
Later that evening, as you returned to your hotel room, your mental high from conquering the carb-filled dinner began to fade. You felt so bloated and your stomach loudly gurgled as it struggled to digest your food, a side effect of the years of denying it enough, often making it hard to truly feel as though you were really doing the right thing. That ugly little voice in the back of your head always loved to tell you it was a mistake to have enjoyed yourself like that.
You got back to the room and flopped yourself on to the bed, curling up into a ball. You let out a quiet groan as your stomach grumbled loudly.
“Are you okay, love?” Jamie asked, getting on to the bed with you, placing a hand on your back.
“My tummy hurts.” You whined. “I shouldn’t have eaten that…” You mumbled into the comforter.
Jamie tutted. “Oh, darling… But it was delicious right?” He sat next to you.
“Yeah…it really was. But I’m so bloated now.”
“Oh yeah? Check me out.” Jamie chuckled, standing up.
You peaked an eye open at him to see he had pulled his shirt up to his chest, pushing out his also bloated belly, cradling it like a pregnant woman. You giggled as you sat up a little bit, frowning quickly again as the adjustment hurt your stomach.
“Why don’t we get you out of that dress and into something comfier, hm?” Jamie lowered his shirt.
You nodded, getting up to let Jamie help take off your form fitting dress, twisting yourself and sucking in as much as you could to hide your distended belly. He grabbed one of his shirts that he wore yesterday, that lay draped over the chair in the corner and handed it to you. You slid it over your head, letting it fall to just above your mid-thigh. You smiled to yourself as it smelled like him. You climbed under the covers of the bed, wincing as your stomach gurgled loudly again.
“Here, take these.” Jamie held out a few Tums to you. “Do you want me to go make you some tea, too?” He asked as you took the tablets from him, popping them in your mouth.
You nodded with a slight smile, which he returned as he made his way toward the kitchenette across the room to put the kettle on. After he had prepared two mugs of tea, he came over to hand you yours. He went around to the other side of the bed, setting his mug down on the nightstand. He climbed into the bed with you, snuggling up close. He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on your tummy through the blankets.
“That should help.” He smiled.
You cuddled together as you sipped your tea, him caressing your back, settling in for the night as your stomach finally began to settle as well.
-the next day-
Jamie and you were going to head down to the beach this sunny, breezy morning. You sipped some coffee as you stood in your bikini in front of the large window that overlooked the water not too far in the distance. Jamie was prepping a bag of snacks and drinks to take down to the beach with you.
“Hey, baby, look at me.” You heard him say behind you.
You turned to see him holding up his phone, about to take a picture of you with the stunning backdrop of seaside Italy outside the window. You immediately frowned, subconsciously moving your arms to cover your exposed body.
“Oh, no…babe, please don’t.”
He lowered his phone, tilting his head. “Why not? You look so beautiful right now.”
You turned to the mirror that was on the wall to the right of you, pinching at your hips and thigh. You shrugged. “I guess I just…feel puffy. I wish I brought a bathing suit that covered more…” You sighed.
“My love…” Jamie walked up to you, wrapping his arms around you from behind. “I think you look so incredible right now.” He placed a kiss just below your ear.
You looked at him in the mirror, and then down at your reflection. “My bikini bottoms are cutting into my hips and my ass cheeks. I feel like it’s too tight.” You frowned, bringing your hands to your stomach. “And I still feel a little bloated.”
Jamie turned you around, now looking at you face to face, taking your hands in his. “Hey, remember what we talked about. It’s okay to feel that way. But you know it’s just that mean little voice trying to trick you. Right? And what did we decide to tell that voice whenever it got too loud?”
“…to shut the fuck up, you miserable ass bitch, because it’s just jealous of how awesome and beautiful I really I am.” You rolled your eyes while giggling.
“That’s right!” He pulled you into a hug, kissing your cheek over and over as you continued giggling. “And I, for one…” He pulled back from you, now dropping to his knees in front of you. “Love your beautiful, amazing tummy…” He placed several kisses to your stomach. “Your beautiful, amazing hips…” He kissed each hip. “Your beautiful, amazing thighs…” He kissed over your thighs.
You smiled down at him as he peppered your body in admiration and acceptance, in total, unconditional love. He stood up to then meet your lips. You pulled away from his mouth, bringing your arms around him in a hug.
“I love you, baby. Thank you.” You smiled against his chest.
“I love you, darling. All of you.” He pulled you tighter.
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vacantgodling · 3 months
Note
REN!!!! gimme the oldies!!!!!!!!!!! I need to be not normal about Dave & Estel &c. ~@void-botanist
ROSE!!!!!! god i'm so not normal about estel and dave like good GOD im not normal about them.
so in the spirit of not being normal about them i decided to partially clean up a piece i've had sitting in my notes for a BRICK cuz i was on the bus home and rotating them like crazy. so, for the backdrop: its been about.... 4 or 5 years removed from the end of vdtrt and dave has moved from ny to washington state to be closer to nature and to start taking photos and stuff. darren and olice are both out of the house; darren has been traveling with gabe and spending time with his relatives, friends and the coven tm, and olice has started college but he HAS formally adopted her. so this happens during the semester; dave gets an unexpected visitor that he hasn't seen in about a year :eye emoji: -- i didn't finish rewriting it fully cuz i'm on the bus and i really just wanted to rewrite the beginning part atm, but dave and estel are in a relationship on the DL at this point. darren suspects that he may be seeing someone, olice has no idea, and lizette CERTAINLY doesn't know that her ex is seeing her father-figure PFFFF. when i do get around to finishing this piece i want it to have the two of them talking about making their relationship more concrete, estel spending more time with dave (basically dave asks him to move in even though he knows it won't "tie estel down" and estel makes dave promise that once olice graduates that the two of them travel together because he wants to show dave the WORLD tm and they're also gonna talk about breaking the news to darren, olice and lizzie ehel em ay oh)
BUT IM STALLING ANYWAY HAVE GAYS:
##
An insistent rap to the door of his cabin is what finally roused Dave from his midday siesta on his horribly comfortable couch. He always told himself that he really should make it upstairs whenever he wanted to sleep; it would be better for his back, but he always found himself here around 3pm, watching some show he couldn’t remember the name of, and dozing—sometimes not waking until it was near 9 o’clock and the sun had already bid the jutting mountains and tiny town he called home adieu. And, looking at the clock, whoever knocked had spared him the crick in his neck, since it was only 5:30. Strange however, he wasn’t expecting anyone in particular today, at this time. He rubbed his eyes and located his glasses buried in the fuzzy soft rug just beneath the horrible comfy couch, and dropped his legs down from it to stand, wriggling his bare toes against its softness. 
The rap sounded at the door again.
“Coming!” Dave called, and ambled over to it. He racked his mind to think; had he promised his lovely neighbors Gloria and Darlene that he would come by to play cribbage this evening? Or did Mr. Sawson finally (finally) decide to return his hose—after what, six months of holding it hostage? Dave really should buy another one, Darren said so the last time they’d facetimed, but it was about the principle, dammit. 
But, neither the sweet if pushy elderly lesbian couple nor the misery Mr. Sawson awaited him when he peered out of the peephole. In fact, aside from Darren or Olice, it was probably the person he most looked forward to seeing at any given moment. 
Dave quickly undid the locks and threw open the door. 
“Estel!” 
“Darling!” Before Dave knew it, long arms wound around him and pulled him close, right there in the middle of the threshold. Dave wrapped his arms around the tall vampire’s waist and they swayed there to some invisible song that only Estel could hear. He often talked about how the universe was full of sounds that his human mind couldn’t hear nor comprehend. 
He’d also said that the song of Dave’s happiness was one of his favorite melodies. 
After a long moment, Estel pulled back to see his face. He cupped Dave’s cheeks with long, lithe fingers. “The starlight’s in your beard now!” He cooed sweetly—starlight in this case referring to the streaks of white that were now more often than incidental in Dave’s beard. Dave was honestly surprised it was taking his beard so long to go fully gray; at only 50 his hair was already white like snow, but he could blame his father for that, who started graying at 30. It seemed his beard was only now in the past year getting the memo, and as it was, Dave chuckled softly in his chest, his cheeks growing warm at the praise.  
“Are you going to let me close the door, Es?” He asked teasingly, but it was fond. Estel laughed and it was like wind chimes. But instead of letting go of Dave, he instead let his arms fall down to Dave’s waist, pulled him in tighter and spun them, gently closing the front door of the cabin with one hand while pressing Dave into it with the other. In this position, Dave’s hands slid from Estel’s waist to the planes of his chest—and he’d probably still never get used to looking up at him like this. Estel didn’t waste time and crowded in, looping one finger in the loop of Dave’s jeans to pull him into a mind numbingly deep, thorough kiss—like he was drowning and Dave was the only source of air. 
Dave gasped into his mouth in surprise but easily opened up to his insistent tongue, feeling his knees go weak and suddenly very thankful the door was there to help prop him up. When Estel finally pulled back and gave him a smug, satisfied little smile and Dave couldn’t help but smile back, a bit self conscious, and hit Estel’s chest lightly. The room brightened once more with Estel’s laugh. 
“You always make such funny faces when I kiss you Dave, dear! I can’t help but want to kiss you more.” Estel illustrated his point by leaning in and sucking the soul out of Dave’s lips once more until Dave finally had to push him back to breathe. 
“Es!” He exclaimed with a breathless laugh. “Can’t you tell I’ve missed you dear?” Estel peppered kisses all over Dave’s face and what else could Dave do but let him?
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artturilehsbian · 1 year
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im going on a long and embarrassing rant below be wary
oh my god watching the avs stanley cup film just made me so emotional
like last years regular season was so special and so fun. like i got to see the away game against the caps which kinda sucked bc the avs lost and i got harrased on the metro on the way home by a guy in a bruins jersey. and i got to see the first game in the avs january where they went like 15-0-1. just the regular season and watching cale really become cale and the avs just constantly dominate and have fun was just so special. i had a really really bad year, but having an avs game to look forward to every other night really kept me going.
the playoffs started the day the i was moving out of my freshman dorm, i stayed up till 5 am packing bc i decided to watch the game with my roommate instead of packing lol. then i flew home with the intention of never going back to that university again lol. and i got to watch most of the playoffs with my dad and eventually my baby sister. and like each playoff series was so special.
like watching the avs completely dominate nashville for 4 games was so fun. like just seeing what that team could do to a team made it feel real, it made it feel like they had a real shot.
then like the series against my #2 enemy, the bl*es. i was at game 1 with my dad. i had been a vulture on ticket master n seat geek trying to find a good deal for like 48 before hand and then i finally did like 5 hours before the game started. and being in the building for a playoff game was just… indescribable? it’s so LOUD all the time. it’s still my fav game of the playoffs.
but like the series against the bl*es was harder to watch then the scf for me. like the stuff with naz was the best narrative of the playoffs but also i’m still mad abt game 5. but the moment darren helm scored the series winning goal i knew that this was the Year. i’ve watched game 6 of round 2 like 10 times just because it was just the moment.
the round 3 was like never a stressor. i have some controversial opinions abt edm and cmcdavid and i knew that the avs were probably gonna win this one. game 1 nearly killed me tho. but like watching game 4 i didnt expect to win and i was okay with that but then they did and lehky scored and mike smith threw a tantrum and then i cried for an hour because ej was so emotional about it. i was actually in an airbnb in the town of the college i transferred to and facetimed my dad after they won and we sat and waited till they confirmed it was a good goal and it didn’t feel real.
and the stanley cup final, oh the stanley cup final. i could write a 10 page essay about this. but game 1 was a blur. but the avs came out in game 2 and had the best scf performance in recent memory and the lightning seemed Scared after it. and it felt so good to see what this team could do. game 3 isn’t important but also tampa shouldn’t have been able to call the offsides back and i think theres a chance the avs win the game if it isn’t called back but i don’t know. then game 4 with kadri’s return and peter mcnabb’s “it’s in!” was just one of the best calls and moments of the series.
then game 5. i woke up and roe v wade was overturned and i was just utterly heartbroken. i had to break the news to my little sister and it was just an awful, awful day. the vibes weren’t right. i don’t think it would’ve felt right if the avs won the cup that day.
but then game 6!! my whole family bought tickets to watch the game at ball arena at the watch party. after the first period i was shitting myself out of nerves bc tampa was up 1-0. but THEN the avs were up 2-1 and i remember going to the bathroom with my sister and being like “holy shit they’re 20 mins away from winning” and then the avs had a phenomenal third period. when they cleared the puck with 10 seconds left the entire arena was just screaming. everyone was standing. then they WON.
i have a photo of my, my sister, and my dad right after they won and it’s my favorite photo of us ever. it was my top moment of 2022 by a long shot and like being in ball arena was just so special. when ej lifted the cup i cried. it didn’t feel real until i was home on the couch watching all the post game. there’s a photo i took of me sitting on the couch just smiling, i didn’t stop smiling until like a week later.
then all the avs post cup stuff was so so fun. seeing them go buck wild for a week just made the whole season feel like it came to a perfect close. i hope ej made it to the titty bar. i also went to the cup parade which was fun, i made eye contact with naz and it was cool. i had to point out all the players to my dad lol. then nathan mackinnon LEFT ME HANGING. im so mad at him for it (jk but also not but also jk)
anyways it’s like midnight and i’m tired and i have a class i probably won’t go to in the morning and im sleepy. but last years avs were so special, that’s the best word for it. everything about the team, from the regular season to the star players to one of the best cup runs of the post cap era. the season meant so much to me and will always hold a place in my heart.
if you read all of this… why… but also enjoy this little piece of my soul and a really shitty look at how i write creative non fiction here’s a really blurry photo of me my dad took after the avs won game 1 of round 2
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ofherlionheart · 2 years
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i swish you would write a fic with zukka as rival roller derby/skateboarding competitors!
oh my god i wish i knew anything about roller derby or skateboarding 😭 all i know is that elliot page movie and the lil rundown my friend gave me abt competition skateboarding vs street skateboarding in relation to the olympics
ignoring the fact that im not an expert in any of these areas tho … like what if. what IF. zuko and sokka first meet as 12 year olds at the skate park, sokka’s got five billion bandaids that barely cover the scabs they’re trying to protect, zuko’s got pads on every joint imaginable and an absolutely ridiculous helmet. they insta bond and quickly become best-skateboarding-buddies. if they’re not skateboarding together, they’re watching videos of street skaters doing tricks.
it only takes a year and change for ozai to realize ursa’s been letting his son do Hooligan Activities. he wants to eradicate skateboarding entirely but ursa convinces him, it’s not Hooligan if it’s an official competition format! z is torn. he’s sad he can’t hang at the park anymore, and he and s both decided a while back that the competition people were boring stiffs with no creativity. but at least he isn’t losing skateboarding entirely
without the skate park bonding, z and s disappear from each other’s lives. also, zuko’s family moves away. 
fast forward … hmm like 6ish years. z has Made It in the competitive skate boarding world — ozai has only kept allowing it b/c that sponsorship money got real 🤪 also zuko now has a RIVAL! they’re constantly battling for the unofficial spot of Best Young Male Upcoming Skateboarder. ppl in the community, ppl looped in the culture, mostly agree that while zuko’s technique is irritatingly flawless, his rival has this flow and artistry that just make him a joy to watch.
zuko finally meets the rival at a local comp. it’s Jet. they do NOT get along, at all, and their clash is so bad it results in zuko’s first ever scandal/bad press coverage. ozai and ursa are Not happy abt it until they realize that ppl are eating this rivalry shit UP.
fast forward another 2ish years of the media and also z and jet fueling the flames of their rivalry, z’s balancing college and competitive skateboarding. he and jet are set to face off at another competition. z’s fired up, he’s zoned in, he’s doing his usual pre-comp routine at the venue when …
“zuko?”
zuko almost wipes out just standing on his board for the first time in forever. “… sokka?”
sokka grins, comes over w/ a bro hug. “shit, dude! it’s been a long time, how are ya?”
but they’re cut off by the competition starting. “I’ll find you after,” sokka promises and then goes … to where the coaches stand?
cute, zuko thinks. bet he looks so cute mentoring some lil skateboarding tykes.
competition blah blah, zuko’s runs go well, but then Jet flawlessly executes his last run. even zuko’s a little breathless from watching him. the scores go up, jet’s clearly the winner, he shouts victoriously and then runs over to the coach’s area and … grabs sokka in a headlock and plants a big wet kiss on his forehead????
sokka has been jet’s young genius coach for the last 4 years, zuko learns. sokka’s the one choreographing jet’s routines [bro idk what they’re called]. sokka’s the one drawing the creativity out of jet, the artistry that zuko’s convinced has everyone liking jet’s skating a touch more than whatever technical perfection zuko can manage. so, in a sense, sokka’s the one standing in the way of zuko becoming the Best Sk8r Boi [of his age bracket].
zuko declares that they’re rivals. sokka humors him (also jet was watching). unfortunately for both of them, they’re bad a maintaining a rivalry when the rival in question is so. u know. cute and talented and hot when they skate oops
BOOM. skate bros-to-rivals-to-lovers (to boyfriends lol).
Send me an anymous (or not) summary of the fic you wish I would write. (maybe I will write a tidbit)
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sensationalsurvival · 6 months
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Entry Two 10.2.23
My weekends are always kind of shitty. Nothing good ever happens.
This weekend, my father stayed home. Usually he works Saturdays. He stayed this time. Even after I had begged God through tears on my knees on my bedroom floor not to let him stay home. Whatever I suppose.
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My father was angry. He always is. His anger is that kind of anger that makes you freeze and turn. Makes sweat run down your back and makes your blood run cold. I like to think he wasnt always this way, but he has always been this way. Wishful thinking I suppose. I dont know. My father, is cruel. Malicious even. Even in those rare moments he shows kindness, its not out of the warmth of his heart. Its always some ploy, some plan, some revenge. For example for the last three weeks, my father had been very loving towards me. Would you like to know why? Oh, right. My sister decided to go to actual classes for college and he was mad at her. He was only loving me, because he wanted some form of revenge.
I wonder what its like to be loved without having to fit into a condition of his making. I wonder what love from a man feels like when it is out of warmth and a pure fatherly love. Will I ever know it?
I dont really know. But for now I suppose all I can do is move forward in a constant motion. I will daydream all the love in the world for myself, I will imagine that sort of heavenly love that makes your knees weak and makes your soul swell with sweetness.
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Besides that, I got an award in school. I didnt feel very special. I felt, undeserving, for some reason. It made me feel worthless, and I cant really tell why. I buried the paper in the back of my closet, behind my stuffed animals. Perhaps they will see worth in it. Maybe it will make them smile.
I wish...I wish I saw something worth saving when I look in the mirror. Something beautiful. Something a boy would love. All I can see is a pig. Even when I put on makeup, its exactly that. Makeup on a pig. I mean. I guess im fine looking enough. Just not enough for a boy to love. Thats what I want. Pretty enough for a boy to love. But sadly Im not.
anywho. Thanks for reading if you read this all <3 This blog has already taken a burden off my back.
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ggthydrangea · 1 year
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hi tabi my dear!! i'm sorry for my late response 😭
yes exactly!! it's freeing to do stuff alone sometimes, it kinda started bc one summer i wanted to watch a scary movie that came out (hereditary) but no one would watch it with me LOL so i decided i'll just go by myself. i used to worry what other people would think but i realized i quite enjoy my own company so now i'm more comfortable doing it! (and of course, since im a minho bias, this reminds me of his latest vlog where he went camping alone haha that was such a comfy cozy vlog 🥺 my mind is still there)
dont worry, i have "cannot shut up disease" too so i totally understand 😂😂 i have also heard of rowoon but i don't think i watched the dramas he was in! also chani was in that snow prince stage last year with mark and lino 😁 and oh my gosh, that mirotic stage with taeyang and hyunjin 😳 taeyang's pose in the beginning AHH
wait i know some of these sf9 songs you mentioned!! i LOVE o sole mio, what a great song. and i've seen the dance practice for KO because of that beginning part where they're rotating the members, that is simply insane!!!! i listened to all the other songs you sent, and they are really catchy omg?? and their choreos are so cool!! is taeyang the one in the sleeveless shirt in the now or never mv? hahahaha. also i love your sf9 info doc <3 it seems like there are a lot of quiet cuties in the group hehe 🥺 i love that!!! also i watched the horror dance prank video LMAO youngbin saying "i was really looking forward to seeing a ghost" famous last words and the way they all freaked out when the bat fell from the ceiling
yeah snowboarding/skiing are so expensive so we'll see if that happens hahaha 😅 i kinda know how to skateboard though and it seemed fun but idk! def one day it seems cool to learn. oooh have you read any good books lately? i like to read as well ^^ i havent watched any anime recently but i have watched a good amount (did you watch/read spyxfamily? that was the last one i watched i think and it was pretty funny). what video games do you like to play? im only a casual gamer, kpop takes most of my brain space 😂😂 i still havent finished zelda botw lol. and that is so cool that you dance too!! how did you get into dancing? i dont know anything about dancing and it always fascinates me to watch dancers move their bodies the way they do!! there is this duo whose dances i really like to watch (i didnt know this when i first found him but the guy, sean, actually did a dance collab that i love with taeyong and mark from nct too!! (also god mark is so hot in that video hahaha)
All good no worries! I can be slow to respond myself, and life happens!
Oh nice! For me it started in college, just with how classes and stuff worked out, I spent most of my time alone and had to go out of my way to hang out with friends, and I started to enjoy some of that alone time, I like just vibing sometimes.
I wish I could tell you what dramas he's been in, but honestly I'm really bad at remembering anything. XD The Mirotic stage is a lot but it's also fun!!! All of them killed it! Those stages with different groups together are so fun, a multis dream come true. 🥺 Now if there could somehow be a stage with both Chan and Taeyang I would die happy... 😂
You have good taste if you love O Sole Mio. 😔 I'm glad you like them all!!! Lemme check to see the only one I remember being shirtless is Hwiyoung... Okay Taeyang does have some shirtless outfits but so does Hwiyoung so I'm not sure which one you're talking about for Now or Never. XD
I'm glad you love my doc!!! I really love sharing SF9 with people so it made for a nice little reference to help! Haha that video... Those poor guys... It was so funny but I also felt so bad for them. 😂
I haven't been reading much recently, but earlier this year I read this YA dystopian book called Unwind! It was really dark but also really interesting, I liked it a lot! How about you?
I'm so behind on anime but I love some of them out there, I could ramble forever just talking about my favorites. I did watch the first season of Spy x Family, it was cute!
I don't game much these days, but I like a lot of the Nintendo stuff like Legend of Zelda, Animal Crossing, Pokemon, but also smaller series like TWEWY, Style Savvy, all sorts of games!
My mom wanted me doing something active and after looking around she somehow found Irish dance, I'm not sure how. XD This was back when I was a kid so I don't really remember. Dancing is so fun I love it a lot!!! Ooo those are really cool!!! I'm nowhere that good I just do it for fun, but I love seeing good dancers, it's so amazing to see all the things they do!!!
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starsandwriting · 3 years
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warmau · 3 years
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☆: bounty hunter! you x thief! minghao au tw: ment of violence/weapons | this was in my drafts so i decided to finish it
“there’s no way in the world any of you are going to catch him, but if you do -”
the head of the police, hong joshua, stands tall and straight behind the podium
the gold of his medals shines harshly under the white light of the town courthouse 
and your mind wanders off as you think about the pretty penny you could get if you were to just happen upon stealing one of those medals....not that a bounty hunter should ever steal 
“but if you do, the police will wipe your own felonious records clean and even offer a good amount of monetary compensation.”
that perks your interest, since you’re currently looking for some extra cash
plus being a bounty hunter isn’t a so called ‘clean’ job - you have stains on your record you’d like to see get erased.
and you know mr. hong doesn’t like you all that much so having him be the one clean up for you is sickly satisfying to some part of your psyche 
you’ve been working in this shitty underground world for too long 
someone’s voice comes from the back of the interrogation room and you don’t even have to look to know that it’s that newbie seokmin 
all excited and bouncy and not-yet-dead-and-cold-inside like the rest of the people around you
“who is the criminal we’re chasing?”
the monitor on the rolled up caddy beside the policeman flickers on 
“xu minghao. he’s a notorious thief in the city, responsible for the last string of high art robberies from the homes and personal collections of the elite.”
you snort, the ‘elite’, being rich makes you some kind of level above human now doesn’t it?
“his latest victims are the choi family, he stole not only paintings but some jewelry as well - possibly high end watches and the sort.”
“choi family?”
god this new kid knows nothing
“choi seungcheol’s family” you say with a yawn “you know, the choi seungcheol - the mayor.”
seokmin gasps and you finally look at him. 
he’s got a build to him that probably helps with physical altercations but he gives off the vibe that he’d faint at the sight of blood
“exactly.” 
joshua shoots a pointed look at you and you kind of dance around in the disgust 
“which is why we are going out on a limb and asking for the bounty hunters to help. the choi family desperately wants these pieces returned to them.”
you look at minghao’s face on the screen, it’s obviously not a mugshot so you note that the police force has actually never caught him
it’s a kind of photo that looks like it has been pulled off a social media account
minghao is standing in some sort of white room, he’s tilting his head and looking at the camera - or maybe the person holding it - and one of his eyes has a piercing blue colored contact in it
his features are angular, sharp, and long - but they fit together to make an unusually handsome kind of face
you slide forward in your chair and take your own phone out to snap a picture of the monitor
“how much for him?”
another voice echoes somewhere from the corner
joshua’s straight-faced expression twitches like he’s trying to believe the number that comes out of his mouth.
“ten million”
you keep counting the zeros in your head as you push your keys into your motorcycle and adjust yourself on the seat
you could retire with that kind of money. you live a frugal existence as it is.
you know that minghao is probably also somewhere in the city, still plotting for his next job. 
he’s been hitting rich people’s houses for two months straight and the choi’s are a victory, for sure, but they’re still not the biggest shark in the ocean.
the people who sponsor them, the people who made seungcheol mayor, minghao has to be going for them next
you make a list of the three family names that come to mind, luckily enough you also know someone who works in the business of ‘technology’ or so who can help you track down the lead forming in your head
you look one last time at the picture of minghao on your phone before you slip it into your jacket pocket and pull out of the parking lot
“how much?”
“stick-up-his-ass hong said ten million, the choi’s really want there watches and monet’s back.”
jihoon turns to you with a deadpan expression
“you know monet’s can go up to ten times that amount right?”
you shrug and shove a half eaten bar of candy in your mouth that you stole from a bowl by his computer
“i don’t know, i didn’t go to college for art history. anyway, can you help?”
“how much of your cut will i get.”
you lick your lips and think for a second
“if i get him alive i’ll cut you in thirty percent. if he’s dead, ten.”
jihoon taps his foot and adjusts the glasses on his nose, he told you once they’re for the blue light or whatever that come out of his six computers.
“deal.”
you come over and see him open up the page of one of the most expensive and professional art dealers in this city, jihoon mentions that this person is in charge of the buying accounts for all of the three families you mentioned
he also happens to manage the choi’s, so looking into him could lead to possible other leads for the three targets you have in mind
“if minghao is planning to rob them - he needs to know what pieces to take. he’s probably also tracking down what they’re currently thinking about buying.”
“yeah, and im gonna assume - you know, bounty hunters intuition or whatever, that he’s going to hit whichever family recently bought the most expensive piece.”
jihoon’s fingers type faster than your eyes can follow. he doesn’t even seem to move his face, just his pupils and then a bunch of screens are popping up everywhere
you had befriended him on an assignment to catch a hacker - not jihoon, although he’s actually got a price on his head too - but another hacker who was clambering up jihoon’s business
you watch as jihoon does his magic, and then in about ten or so minutes you have an answer
“one of the family’s just bought and received a vase from this guy, it won its auction at around twenty five million. it’s from the ming dyn-”
“which family?”
you don’t care if they got a vase, a sofa, a painting, or a gold and diamond encased piece of potato - something in your stomach told you that whoever just spent the most was on minghao’s radar and minghao was on yours
jihoon adjusts his glasses
“that would be ... oh, that would be the yoon family.”
you taste something iron on the tip of your tongue, yoon jeonghan was on the cover of last month’s vogue if you remember correctly
“got it. thanks.”
you shrug your jacket back on and jihoon spins around in his chair when you get to the door of his dark apartment 
“remember, thirty if he’s alive!”
“and ten if he’s not!”
you don’t like the fact that this new kid, seokmin, is standing outside the giant gates of the yoon family mansion 
he’s wearing a cut off white t-shirt and new balances for christs sake
“hey!” he looks like he’s seen the sun when he spots you sort of loitering nearby, you try to ignore him but he’s coming over
“hi.”
“staking out the yoon’s? my first impression was they’d be minghao’s next targets because they’re rich and like art too.”
you wonder how he knows that so you ask, half expecting he might actually tell you - which would be a stupid thing to do.
he does.
“oh! i mean their son is a designer, they must be the best people to steal from.”
that’s so fucking ridiculous but he’s actually right. going to tell jihoon im cutting his share in half since apparently his intel could have been free.
“uhuh. well good luck.”
the words are stale when you say them, but sparkling eyes seokmin takes them to heart with a gracious “you too!”
you actually didn’t come to stake them out - you came to see if minghao might be staking them out
no good thief actually just bursts into someone's home, they need to know every nook and cranny of a place if they want to get out clean
judging by minghao’s track record, you can tell he’s cautious and detailed
you circle the house at a safe distance and then head back home, you read a bunch of articles on minghao’s past crimes and eat the only thing you have in your fridge which is mint ice cream - it was left there by a late night hook up who’d doordashed 7/11 even when you told them not to
you do some other minor research on smaller bounties you could chase after minghao is caught, none are interesting or any where near the price of minghao’s
you lay down and the stray you recently started letting crawl through the fire escape makes a little fuzzy circle at the base of your feet
you look at your phone, look at the photo of minghao
wonder if he’s as detailed orientated in other things aside from stealing. looks like he’d know what to do with his hands.
you fall asleep with the phone on your chest.
the next day, you’re texting jihoon about the seokmin thing - he tells you to piss off and not even think about downing his cut or he’ll leak your social security on the internet
that’s so fucked up dude
you’re a shit bounty hunter and im a hermit hacker we aren’t good people anyway
fine, are the yoon’s buying any other vases or whatever
actually, they won an auction a month ago for some ceramics. heard they’re coming tomorrow.
oh, might be a good time to steal that vase and some extra trinkets too for our thief 
look how ugly these things are tho
jihoon sends you a photo pulled from the auctioning website, they are ugly, but they’re expensive
you rub your temple and decide that’s enough for today, you don’t see seokmin around either
seungcheol’s generic smiling im-a-good-mayor-and-i-kiss-babies face is grainy on your tv
you eat the takeout you picked up on the way back and are only mildly surprised when you notice someone familiar in the crowd
this is old footage, from a rally he did before the crime
your eyes pan to the corner and pull out one person from the sea of faces, everyone looks so excited to see seungcheol, minghao stands staunch and unwavering in the moving bodies
he’s not grinning - he’s kind of half smirking from what you can tell
he really does his research, i kind of like him
you put the chopsticks into your mouth, yeah. i think he’s going to be a fun one to catch.
goddamn seokmin is here again - on the night the drop shipment of the ceramics is scheduled - you tell yourself you were a clown for believing all that ‘i just thought they’d be the right family!’ bullshit he was telling you about
he probably has an informant of his own, definitely not jihoon though. seokmin is the type jihoon would rather drive a usb through his head than ever cooperate with
you avoid him the second you see his strong shilloute and make your way to the otherside of the house, right on the outskirts of the back garden
there’s one person in it - none of the immediate yoon family you can recognize, probably just a worker
you know there’s three entrances from here - the garden doors, the side opening that leads to an underground washing room, and there’s also a way to get into the back of the kitchen
you are betting that either one of them might be a good choice for minghao, but you put your bet on the washing room - it has stairs that lead up into a spare bedroom which is adjacent to a gallery type room inside of the huge mansion
it’s where the family will probably put the items, rich people love to be all like “look at my room of expensive things you don’t get to touch”
you stick your tongue out to yourself, morally you don’t care about thievery. especially when it’s stolen art stolen from people who just want it to feel superior to others
but minghao is worth ten million, that’s why im taking the higher ground on this ‘crime’
bounty hunters are allowed to carry guns, but you’ve never liked them - you like to use mace instead
that being said, you’ve brought your gun along - unloaded - just to use a scare tactic if push comes to shove. it’s heavy and it reminds you constantly of the job you came to do.
no getting distracted by newbie muscle heads or how hot you’re coming to think minghao is 
you hear something - eyes darting to behind one of the columns of a large gazebo in the garden
you swear you see something slink across as the only person in the garden gets up to head back inside
keeping your movements and noise to a minimum, you position your body for a better view and after what seems like two heartbeats you see him dart from the enclosure and toward the mansion
you don’t follow immediately, the only way you’re going to catch someone who is so elusive is if you one up him
you have the element of surprise, but not really, he might be expecting personal guards of the yoon household or the police
not a rogue bounty hunter with a can of mace
but he’s still expecting - and someone whose entire job is to be like a shadow - you’ve got to be careful
you wait the amount of time you deem appropriate and then do the same, you realize when you slip through the backdoor of the washroom that now you’re also committing a crime of breaking and entering
you’re sure the yoon’s won’t mind though - you are about to make sure their ceramics and vases don’t get stolen
plus, you checked up on all of them, the main family shouldn’t be home. the only people on premises are some cleaners and the gardener. you’re sure minghao knows that too.
you map out the house in your mind from what you’ve learned in the past couple of days and find the gallery with ease
you can see the large double doors are open just enough for a person to slip through
so he’s already in ther-
“HEY YOU! YOU BETTER STOP!”
your eyes widen and you push inside to see what’s going on 
seokmin, flashing something in his right hand and holding a light in the other is pointing at the long, lean figure of minghao
he’s standing there in the circle of light holding the vase you and jihoon had been looking at before
his eyes are unimpressed when they settle on seokmin
“ok, ive stopped - now what are you going to do?”
“im going to arrest you and bring you to the poli-”
the vase that’s held professionally between both his arms then gets dropped and crashes to the floor
the crescendo of noise startles seokmin because it’s the one thing all these new kids who want to try this kind of work get wrong
the thief is never going to drop the valuable goods - except they are, getting caught is worse then anything else. 
there will always be shit to steal - except you know if you’re in jail.
minghao beelines for the doors and you’re there, big grin and mace in hands
“hi!”
his eyes widden and you tackle him with ease, one hand bent behind his back as you make sure to keep your weight off him
“ugh, that big idiot had a partner?”
“he’s not my partner, by the way that vase is worth more than what im getting for your head.”
minghao shifts his cheek against the hard floor of the gallery and he’s smiling back up at you
“how much for me?”
“choi’s but ten million.”
he makes a pfft sound as he releases air from between his lips
“cheap as fuck.”
seokmin tries to bound over to help once he comes to, but you bite at him to back off. this is your win.
he says he can drive you and minghao to the station, but you tell him again that you’ve got this on your own
you kind of feel bad about how flustered he is and you tell him he can still brag about how you two were the only people with sense to look at the yoon’s 
for some reason, that actually brightens him up. he leaves to go downstairs and you don’t know if he sticks around or goes off on another job.
you get the handcuffs on minghao’s wrists before the workers, who hear the noise come running up in terror
you flash your bounty id and they scramble to get a hold of the local police office
minghao sits up against the wall and you sit directly in front of him - you can see him better with the lights on
his dark hair is long in the back and messy, his eyes are brown and long and twinkle when you look into them
the bottom corners are highlighted by what you can’t tell if is sweat or glitter
“you’re different”
he starts and you put up a finger
“im not different, im just experienced.”
“you like money more than you like your morals.”
you put the finger down and gleam at him
“bingo”
“so why are you sitting here waiting to hand me over for some chump change like ten million dollars when you and i are inches away from a collection that’s worth close to a hundred million?”
you touch the holster on your hip and tilt your head
“we - even the two of us - wouldn’t be able to steal everything in there. we’d need a whole team and-”
you start as minghao open’s his mouth to counter. all his teeth are white and straight.
“and if we could, you’d backstab me and take it all and run because you just said it yourself. money over morals.”
“ive got morals when im dealing with the right people.”
the snort you let out is louder than you expect and it makes minghao cock an eyebrow
“don’t care, you’re a professional liar. plus hong said he’d clear our records and get us that money.”
“joshua hong works for choi seungcheol who is a bigger liar than i am and you know it.”
there’s real spite in the way he says it - you assume he’s probably had interactions with both. or he’s just grown up in this city like you have, all the trouble politics can cause - all the stupid, underhanded shit that goes on
he leans a little forward
“plus, you’re hot. usually anyone who manages to catch me is very gruff and very mean.”
“i am gruff and mean, don’t test me.”
you banter but then look around and the gardener who was supposed to stay up here with you and minghao has turned his attention elsewhere - normal people don’t like facing criminals and well...whatever category bounty hunters are in.
“what’s the most expensive thing in that room.”
you ask under your breath suddenly, the police won’t be here for another five minutes at least. 
you text jihoon to tap into their comms and let you know the exact moment they’re at the door.
minghao shines that grin, slender fingers lift up and toward the door
“i broke it, but that place is jammed of other million dollar treasures. i saw an original signac that could score us close to 17 million.”
“a signac? who is that?”
minghao laughs with his hands still behind him
“so you’re hot but not into art, i can still work with that. he’s an artist, paul signac. the yoon’s own ‘la corne d'or.’” 
you shrug your shoulders again and pretend you don’t hear the first part but mutter that art doesn’t make sense to you and minghao lets out another quieter laugh
“it’s a painting of boats but it looks psychedelic almost, super colorful. thirty six or so inches across.”
you think to yourself - one painting and it’s 17 million, what if you get another painting with it
“ok...anything else in there catch your eye?”
minghao wiggles a little 
“lots, i know art like people know starbucks orders. very well.”
your phone pings and it’s jihoon’s warning. the police are going to be coming upstairs to take minghao off your hands in the next sixty to ninety seconds.
“i can’t trust you.”
he thins his lips and then taps your foot with his own, does a weird jostle of his body and then to your shock breaks out of his handcuffs with ease
he rubs his wrists as you think you hear some noise downstairs and the gardener jumps out of his seat to go greet the police without noticing the thing that just happened only a feet away from him
“i’ve had a bobby pin this whole time, i could have run away five whole minutes ago instead of giving you a history lesson on boat paintings worth more money than you’ve ever dreamt of.”
you don’t miss a beat 
“let’s get the fucking boats then.”
you get up and minghao takes a hold of your hand in a way you haven’t experienced since maybe middle school
like when a beloved childhood friend would take you and lead you toward the playground, giggle about school or your parents, pull you in to a fun moment under the basking sun
you and him stand, hand in hand, in front of the painting he mentioned
it’s pretty, it almost looks like it was drawn by crayons, you wonder why it’s so expensive 
“let’s take it and the two sketches over there, one’s a lady with a piano the other is a couple under an umbrella
“are they-”
“at least two million each. plus - we can comeback for the ceramics later.”
you don’t know why it makes you feel warm - but it does and you take the two framed sketches off the wall
the painting is large, but minghao has done this enough times before that he knows how to handle it - you two are out the hall and down the stairs by the time you hear the police shuffling up them
took their time thinking he’d just be sitting up there wrapped up like a present huh?
you think to yourself, minghao is quick on his feet and leads you in the direction of a inconspicuous looking tiny car that could seat you, him and maybe that stray that hangs around your apartment 
he opens the back and it is a perfect size for the painting
“did you come here on your bike?”
you realize the whole look of you must give away the fact that you ride one
“never, i dont bring it on jobs because people know what it looks like.”
he tips his fingers toward you in acknowledgement
“good because this car isn’t mine either, so add auto theft to the list of crimes you’re committing with me on this first date.”
you bite the inside of your cheek, can’t tell if he’s joking or not
he hits the gas before there’s any movement on the street where it’s parked - the yoon mansion fades into the distance as he rushes into the evening traffic
“is this the part where you kick me to the curb?”
you ask
minghao takes one hand off the wheel and puts it on your thigh
“this is the part where you tell me where you live so we can go get your things and ride off into the sunset, bonnie.”
you laugh
“so you’re clyde?”
he looks at you at a red light - looks at your lips and then your eyes
“do you want me to be?”
you can decide the answer to that yourself
*if you’re interested here is la corne d’or on the sothebys website. 
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taestefully-in-luv · 3 years
Text
Always You | JJK (Eight-Part 1)
Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?
Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader
Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama
Word Count: 11.5k (part 1)
Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (!!!), mentions of sex, oc struggles with her future, mentions of vibrator, mentions of cum eating, dirty talk, vaginal fingering, oral (female receiving), masturbation, swallowing
Notes: I am having to post this chapter in two parts, I am so sorry about that! But here it is!! Hope you guys enjoy this chapter:) feel free to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:) I LOVE talking with ya’ll!
Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @aclowe13 @bishuthot @271101 @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch @not-your-lion @flowersgirl02 @justinetingball @fiantomartell @fairysunooo @taebae19
© taestefully-in-luv
Previous ---- Next
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
September
“What about this one?” You hold up another birthday banner, showing Vanessa yet another option.
“Ugly.” She says.
This is the fourth fucking birthday banner you’ve shown her and she doesn’t approve of any of them. But you have to admit this one is a little ugly.
“Vanessa…” you groan out, getting very obviously frustrated.
“I like this one.” She points to a banner. The very first one you showed her.
“Seriously?” you grab the banner and place it in your cart. “Okay, we still have to pick up the cake at 3. And we need to make sure we have enough plates for everyone…oh! We also still have to pick up the bottles at the liquor store.”
“I can get the cake.” She replies smoothly.
“We can just go together?”
Today is Jungkook’s birthday and you and Vanessa have been (Kind of) texting throughout the last week trying to find a good day to meet up. The day happened to be today of all days, so you’re feeling quite rushed.
“Fine.” Vanessa picks at her cuticles, just standing here looking gorgeous.
You on the other hand…were not expecting this to be a fashion show! You’re in shorts and a t shirt while she wears a flowy green dress and sandals.
“I want to be the one to present his cake to him though,” Vanessa begins, her eyes never leaving her fingers, “I am his girlfriend after all.”
You hate that your chest tightens at her words, you hate how her words affect you like this, how she affects you like this. Just being in her presence alone makes your heart twist.
“Got it.” You place some birthday plates in the cart, “So…what did you get him for his birthday?” you try to make conversation.
“A cologne.”
“You know he’s sensitive to smells—”
“He likes this one.”
“Oh.”
“I know him better than you think y/n.” her smooth voice cuts you like a butcher knife.
You nod your head, not knowing what to say. Maybe she does. But like, you still know him better right? You got to, right?
“What about you?” Vanessa lifts her eyes to meet yours, her eyes are small and dark and inviting.
“Uh, to be honest…I’m meeting with Jimin after this so we can go shopping for his gifts. So, I don’t know yet but I have an idea.”
“And what’s your idea?” her eyes go back down to her nails that she keeps picking at.
“Friendship bracelets.” You state.
“Hm.” Vanessa pushes the cart forward and walks towards the isle with candles. “We still need nice candles for the cake.”
“Right.”
~~~~~~~
“It couldn’t have been that bad, babe.” Jimin holds up a plain black hoodie and nods approvingly. “Another one for his collection, what do you think?”
“Looks like something I’d steal, so yes.” You give him a quick thumbs up, “And it was bad dude. She’s so hard to talk to!”
“Yeah, I could see that.” Jimin stands in front of a full body length mirror and checks himself out, pushing his hair out of his face. “Forehead or no forehead, tonight?”
“Hmm, no forehead.”
“Forehead it is.”
“Wow, you never listen to me!”
Jimin chuckles wholeheartedly, shrugging his shoulders like he agrees with you.
“So, where are these bracelets you keep going on about?”
“That one weird shop buy the smoothie place has these cute bracelets with letters for names on them! I was thinking I could get him a black one with my initial on it and I would get myself one with his initial.”
“You guys are so…that’s cute I guess.” Jimin giggles, he holds up his wrist as if imagining himself with the bracelet. “I want one too!” he whines.
“Maybe for your birthday.” You wink. “Anyway, do you think Vanessa knows Jungkook better than me?”
Jimin stops walking to get a look at you, an expressions that reads: Are you serious? Plastered on his face.
“It’s a valid question.” You say.
“No one knows Jungkook like you honey.”
“Okay…Also, you’ll be meeting my friend Yoongi tonight!”
“The not date, date guy?” Jimin pouts, “I thought you weren’t going to lead him on…”
You scrunch up your face in confusion,
“I can have friends Jimin, I’m not leading him on!” you try to defend.
“If you say so. Just like, try to focus on one boy at a time, you know?” Jimin teases.
You two walk to the shop that sells the bracelets and go inside. You find the bracelets you’re looking for rather quickly, feeling nice and lucky. You grab them and go to pay, when you finish up at the register you notice a Jack Skellington key chain and add it on to Jungkook’s gifts. You always have trouble finding good gifts for people, okay? You take what you can get.
“Shit, it’s already 6. I still need to go home and get ready!”
~~~~~
Nick lets you and Vanessa use their place as the spot to celebrate, it’s bigger than your place and Vanessa agrees saying it’s bigger than hers as well. Nick and his bro that believes in aliens (You really got to learn his name but at this point you are too afraid to ask) are the only ones here as you and Vanessa set up.
“Bro AI is out to get us man—” Aaanndd you are tuning him out, you watch as Nick listens closely, nodding his head every few minutes and whispering ‘Bro’. You and Vanessa hang up decorations in silence, the sound of Nick and his bro chatting away filling the room.
“People should start arriving soon…” you try to make small talk with Vanessa, she only hums in response not even sparing you a glance.
“You look nice.” You try giving her a compliment, she turns her head to the side to look at you and a sly smile grows on her face.
“Do you have feelings for Jungkook?”
You immediately choke on your fucking spit, what the actual fuck? You try to compose yourself when you hear the front door opening. Thank God.
“It is I!” You know that voice. “Where is my Jungkookie?” You hear Jin entering the living room along with Namjoon and Hobi.
“Jimin should be bringing him in the next 30 or so minutes!” you yell out. Once Jin and the other two boys spot you they light up.
“y/n!!!” Jin hurries to your side and bring you in for a quick hug. “How are you?!”
“Good, good.” You laugh, hugging him back.
“Good to see you y/n” Namjoon says with a soft smile and then you hear your named being shouted even though Hobi is a foot away from you.
“Long time no see!!!” He hugs you, shaking you around in his embrace. You can’t help but chuckle at your friend.
“Hi guys, I’m so glad you could make it.”
“Would we miss our Jungkookie’s birthday? No way.” Jin says.
“Oh,” you turn around to see Vanessa just standing behind you, not saying anything just staring. “This is Vanessa. Jungkook’s—”
“We know!” Hobi says, “Jungkook has brought her to Jin’s. Nice to see you again Vanessa!”
Vanessa tilts her head and nods, her lips not even attempting to curve into a smile.
“You too.” She finally says.
This girl either has no manners or just does not know how to properly socialize? Maybe she gets anxiety being around too many people?
You feel your phone buzz.
Yoongs 7:14pm
Im outside
“Be right back guys, a friend of mine just got here.” You try talking over your group of friends. You head towards the front door, swinging it open to a Min Yoongi waiting patiently.
He smiles at you when he sees you, he holds up a bottle of wine and shakes it around a bit.
“For the party.” He says.
“Perfect, let’s pour us a glass right now!” you gesture him to enter the apartment.
You two walk into the kitchen, and you start searching for a wine bottle opener but can’t seem to find it.
“Hey Nick!” You yell out, hoping to get his attention, “Where’s the wine opener?”
Nick shuffles into the kitchen and gives you an expression that screams he has no idea.
“I know where it’s at.” Vanessa’s silky voice fills your ears as she enters the kitchen.
“Oh.” Of course she does. Why wouldn’t Vanessa know? She probably comes here more than you do…
“Thanks.” You finally say when she hands you the wine opener.
“Well, let’s open this baby up!” you turn to face Yoongi and he smiles at you.
“Hi Vanessa.” Yoongi waves at the girl and she hums in response, walking out of the kitchen.
“Sorry, she’s…” but you don’t know what to say. Also, why are you trying to excuse her?
You pour you and Yoongi a glass and gulp it down quickly, you finish your first glass in just seconds.
“I need another one.”
“What’s got you so stressed in a time of celebration?” Yoongi casually sips on his wine, one baby sip after the other.
“Nothing, nothing.”
“y/n…” his soft tone makes you feel comforted already and he hasn’t even said anything yet.
“I don’t know how to say it without sounding psychotic.” You admit, pouring yourself your second glass of wine.
“Try me.”
“I feel like I am competing…with…”
“With Vanessa?” He gladly finishes for you.
“Yeah, like…I don’t know, I feel like she’s trying to take my place. But my place isn’t ‘girlfriend’ so I don’t know what I’m freaking out about.”
Yoongi sets his glass down and studies you for a moment, you begin to feel antsy under his gaze.
“I’m obviously on your side,” Yoongi begins in a hushed voice, “But maybe she’s worried too?”
“I wish I knew if she felt worried, or felt like, anything. This girl is hard to crack!” you quietly say.
“Just try to enjoy the night, okay?” Yoongi smiles and you don’t even feel like smiling back but you do. Suddenly, you feel your phone going off.
Jungkook 7:32pm
Why is Jimin making me dress up? I thought it was just a couple of us? Why do I need to look nice, I’m tired from work
Jungkook 7:33pm
Seriously y/n…it’s just a couple of us, right?
y/n 7:35pm
omg yes Jungkook it’s nothing big I swear, he just wants you to look nice for pictures
Jungkook 7:36pm
I always look nice for pics lol
y/n 7:38pm
No comment
Jungkook 7:40pm
Don’t be fukin rude
` y/n 7:40pm
Can you guys hurry up?
Jungkook 7:44pm
Jimin is in the mirror deciding if he’s showing his forehead or not
y/n 7:45pm
classic Jimin
Jungkook 7:45pm
Classic Jimin
You stuff your phone in your back pocket and grab your glass of wine and begin sipping on it again. Yoongi eyes you up and smirks.
“That the birthday boy?”
“Hm? Oh, sorry…yes. He and Jimin should be here soon.” You watch as Yoongi nods his head and then you realize…”Oh my god, let me introduce you to the guys!” you set your glass down on the counter and reach for Yoongi’s hand and pull him towards the living room. Unfortunately for you, you miss the way Yoongi blushes at the contact.
“Guys, guys.” You interrupt the boys from their conversations, “This is my friend Yoongi…” you gesture towards the boy, “Yoongi, this is Jin…Namjoon, Hobi, and Nick and his pal, uh…” you blink at Alien Dude and he just grins at you, not realizing you don’t know his fucking name. “Yeah, anyway.” You decide to move on, “Jungkook and Jimin should be here soon—” Suddenly, there is soft knocking on the door. You raise a brow because who else could it be?
You walk towards the front door and look through the peep hole and much to your surprise you see Holly and Trina waiting outside the door. You’re quick to open it with a wide smile on your face.
“I thought you didn’t want to come?” You ask, your question directed towards Trina.
“I…” her eyes slide to Holly, “…Had a change of heart.” She huffs out quietly.
“You’re going to be civil?” you smirk at your friend and she rolls her eyes at you.
“She’s going to be more than civil.” Holly pipes up, “She’s going to be nice.”
“Hey we never agreed to that!” Trina crosses her arms over her chest, “But whatever.”
“Thanks for coming T.” your smirk transitions into a soft smile. This means a lot to you, that Trina is trying to accept Jungkook.
“Well? Are you going to let us in or what?”
“Right, right.” You move to the side and let the girls through. They step inside and make their way towards the boys.
“Oh? You must be Mister Oatmeal Raisin!” Trina grins towards Yoongi, who stands here chatting with Hobi.
“You’re…let me guess, Trina? And you must be Holly?” he nods at both girls, “I’ve heard a lot about you two.”
“I hope good things?” Trina teases.
“Only the best.” Yoongi raises his glass to her and she turns her head to smirk at you.
You watch as everyone gets along, talking, laughing and having a good time—all except Vanessa. She is sitting on the sofa on her phone, tapping away. She doesn’t even try to converse with any of Jungkook’s friends? Strange. You hate her, technically. But you can’t help but feel bad? Like, why does she isolate herself so much? Does she really just have some social anxiety or something? There’s got to be a reason for her odd behavior.
“Hey.” You say, sitting on the sofa next to her. “You okay?”
“Hm?” Vanessa doesn’t look up from her phone as she barely acknowledges you.
“Why don’t you come hang out with the rest of us?”
Vanessa tilts her head to get a look at you and she blinks at you repeatedly.
“Why?” she finally asks. “I’m only here for Jungkook.”
Okay, ouch.
“Oh...well—”
“You never answered my question from earlier,” Vanessas coy smile begins growing on her face. “How you feel about Jungkook.”
You feel your palms get sweaty when you process her words. How the hell do you respond to that?
“I—I…” Then the front door is opening and you hear Jimin obnoxiously announce their arrival, that he has the birthday boy.
You immediately jump to your feet and rush towards the entrance of the apartment to greet your friends.
“Too bad you can’t admit it, “ Vanessa whispers, her eyes going back to her phone, “I could help you too.”
“JUNGKOOKIE!!!” Jin opens his arms wide, “Come and embrace me! It’s your birthday gift.” Jungkook stumbles in the apartment with wide eyes as he searches the living room. His eyes find yours and he smiles. He shows you his bunny grin and you can’t help but smile back. He looks breathtaking, Jimin didn’t play around picking Jungkook’s outfit. Ripped black jeans, chunky boots, a plaid shirt with a leather jacket—he looks hot as hell. Vanessa is a lucky girl, you think bitterly to yourself.
Jungkook greets his friends one by one until he sees Yoongi walk from the kitchen into the living room. Yoongi has refilled his wine glass and stops just in front of Jungkook and bows his head in greeting. You rush to the two boys, joining them in this awkward encounter.
“Oh, I invited Yoongi.” You begin to explain, “You remember Yoongi, right?” you ask Jungkook.
“Of course…” Jungkook tries smiling but it’s tense and strained. At this, Yoongi smirks.
Yoongi steps closer to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder and he smiles at Jungkook.
“I’m y/n’s plus one tonight—or I guess her…date?”
“D-Date?” You and Jungkook both stutter out.
Yoongi brings you in closer, nice and snug against his shoulder as he chuckles.
“Something like that.”
Jungkook tries releasing a breath but finds it to be troublesome. He looks at you with an expression you cannot really decipher, but he doesn’t look all too pleased.
“That’s nice.” He finally says, scratching the back of his neck.
“What’s nice?” It’s a smooth and silky voice. Vanessa. “Happy birthday babe.” She joins your circle next to Jungkook and places a kiss on his cheek.
“Right…” you butt in, “Happy birthday Jungkook.” You smile, still in Yoongi’s arms.
“What do you want to do first?” Vanessa links arms with Jungkook and you feel your body go tense. You don’t want her to touch him.
“Eat.” Jungkook laughs, “I’m so hungry.”
“Well, we have pizza for everyone.” You say loudly, getting the rest of everyone’s attention.
“You say pizza? Hell yeah.” Trina walks towards you four with Holly following behind her.
“Oh hey Trina…” Jungkook says, not entirely too sure how to talk to the girl that hates him.
“Hey Jungkook,” she says quickly with a smile, “So where’s the pizza?”
Jungkook and you share a look of pleasant surprise. Trina? Being nice?
The rest of the boys follow and you all head inside the kitchen to snag a few slices of pizza from the pizzeria that Jungkook is fond of. Vanessa stays close to Jungkook’s side, not that you are surprised. But what is surprising you is that Yoongi has suddenly become slightly more affectionate with you?
Yoongi takes any chance he can get to touch you in some way, whether it be picking a piece of thread off your shirt, or placing a wild strand of hair behind your ear. He doesn’t really strike you as the type to be so openly affectionate…at least not the one to initiate it.
But can picking a piece of thread off your shirt really be counted as affectionate? Maybe he’s just trying to help. What you don’t know though…Jungkook has picked up on too. He has watched as Yoongi smiles at you and you smile back, he has watched as Yoongi subtlety touches your arm when he talks to you and how your hand finds his shoulder when you laugh.
Jungkook sits on his couch, chowing down on a slice of pizza as he glares at you and Yoongi. He doesn’t mean to glare but why is he here? This is a small get together between close friends. How close have you and Yoongi gotten?
“And then bro, I was like no fucking way bro.” Alien bro talks animatedly, his hands motioning all around the place.
Nick stuffs another slice of pizza in his mouth, nodding along to Alien bro’s story.
“That is fucking wild.” You hear Trina pitch in, “Like, did that really happen to you?”
“It may have been a dream, but let me tell you…” Alien bro closes his eyes, “I think it was real, like a memory.”
You internally laugh, because this dude has got some wild fucking stories and you don’t know how to take him seriously. But everyone seems to be enjoying it.
“Let’s do cake!” You hear Jimin yell out, “I have such a sweet tooth right now.”
At this you see Vanessa actually light up, like she has been waiting all night for someone to mention the cake. You two agreed she could present it to Jungkook, maybe that’s why she’s so visibly excited.
“I’ll go get it…” She speaks up, “I’ll be right back.” She says, facing Jungkook. Vanessa stands from her spot next to Jungkook on the couch and heads towards the kitchen.
A few minutes pass by when you hear your name being called. You get up and walk to the kitchen when you see Vanessa with the cake in her hands, the candles already lit up.
“Can you turn off the lights?” she asks, “And you can start the Birthday song.”
You nod your head, walking back into the living room to switch the lights off.
“Okay, ready Jungkook?” you smile at him and he rolls his eyes with a smirk.
“I guess.” He says, amusement laced in his voice.
“Happy birthday to you!” you begin singing, the rest of the gang joins in and the living room is soon being filled with the sound of everyone’s voices singing Jungkook a happy birthday. You pull out your phone and begin recording, Vanessa walks in with the cake and she keeps her face neutral. She doesn’t even sing, wow. You can’t help but kind of laugh, that’s so in character for her.
“Happy birthday dear Juuuungkoook, Happy birthday to you!” You all finish up and start whooping and hollering.
“Make a wish.” Vanessa sets the cake down in front of him and Jungkook nods his head. He takes a deep breath before his eyes find yours. You guys share a brief moment before he’s blowing out his candles.
“What did you wish for?!” Hobi asks, excitement filling the room as everyone agrees that they want to know.
“Secret.” He says, still looking at you.
“Here,” Vanessa nudges a perfectly wrapped box in Jungkook’s hands, “Present.”
“You didn’t have to Vanessa.” Jungkook grins at her but he’s already unwrapping his gift, he throws the wrapping paper to the floor and takes a look at the cologne box.
“This is so expensive!” he whines, “But thank you!” He looks at you for a moment when he awkwardly pecks Vanessas lips in front of everyone.
“My turn!” Jimin shouts, “My turn, my turn!” he stands up and walks by the front door where he left the gift. He picks up the bag and walks back into the living room, standing in front of Jungkook, handing him the bag.
“You’ll love it.” Jimin wiggles his brows at the boy.
Jungkook wiggles his brows back as he opens up the bag and pulls out a black hoodie.
“Fuck yeah.” Jungkook stands up to hug Jimin, “This one is so soft.”
The rest of the gang gives Jungkook a gift one by one until all eyes are on you. Suddenly, you feel super fucking shy and lame that you got matching bracelets.
“Uh, I haven’t gotten anything for you yet…” you lie. “But I will soon, promise.”
Jungkook’s bunny smile begins to fade as he processes your words,
“No worries, y/n.” he smiles again, “You don’t have to get me anything.”
“It’s just a little late, is all.” You shift awkwardly from one foot to another. You wish you weren’t such an idiot. You notice Jimin staring at you from across the room, he looks disappointed.
“What about the bracelets y/n?” Vanessa’s voice can be heard by everyone. She looks at you with a blank expression and you never wanted to strangle someone more.
“What bracelets?” Jungkook’s curiosity showing.
“It’s nothing.”
“It’s not nothing. They’re friendship bracelets. Such a sweet idea.” Vanessa smiles at you.
“You got me and you friendship bracelets?” Jungkook stands up and walks to you, he extends his right hand out and waits expectantly.
“Thanks Vanessa.” You deadpan.
“No problem.”
“It’s really nothing Jungkook…”
“I want the damn bracelet y/n.”
You stare at him for a moment, his big doe eyes making you feel like you must give in.
“okay, they’re in my bag…” you turn around and search for your purse. You notice Yoongi trying to hand it you and you smile at him gratefully.
“Here.” You hand him his bracelet and he inspects it, rolling it through his fingers.
“Your initial?” Jungkook clenches the bracelet in his fist and looks up at you.
“I fucking love it.” He brings the bracelet to his heart, “I will wear it every day.”
“I have one too…” you pull it from your bag and dangle in around.
“It has a J?” Jungkook bunny smile grows ten times as wide. He takes the bracelet from your fingers and chuckles at the two bracelets.
“I love it.”
“I’m glad you like it—”
“No, love it. I love…” Then he’s clearing his throat, remembering he is in a room full of people.
“Thank you.”
“Oh! There’s one more thing…” you pull out the key chain and you watch as Jungkook’s face lights up. Of course he is more excited about the key chain, you laugh.
“Fucking awesome!” Jungkook takes it from you, “I’ll put it on my keys!”
“That’s the idea,” you chuckle. “Anyway, let’s play games now.”
You and Jungkook stand at the front of the living room, in front of the T.V in battle mode.
“You’re going down Jeon.” You snicker at him, he only rolls his eyes at you as he readies himself.
“I’m just glad I’m not going against Jimin.” Jungkook shoots Jimin a look and Jimin winks.
You two have to chug an entire beer can, trying to beat the other.
“Honestly, same.” You admit, if anyone can down a drink in seconds—it’s Jimin.
Trina stands up and joins your side,
“Okay, are we ready everyone?”
Everyone begins cheering, the sound motivating you and making you feel excited.
“Okay. When I yell…BAM…you start drinking and don’t stop until that can is empty…got it?”
“Yes, we know how to chug a drink, Trina.”
“Damn girl, I was just sayin’.” Trina throws a hand on her hip, “Okay, 3…2…1…BAM!”
You and Jungkook scramble to start drinking, the chilly liquid making its way down your throats. The drink is cold and carbonated and you’re trying to ignore the way it sizzles, instead pretending it’s as smooth as water and you down it back.
“Jungkook is going to win!” Namjoon yells out, he has risen to his feet, the excitement too much.
“No, y/n is! Look how much her head it tilting back!” You hear Jin chime in.
Truth is, you aren’t really sure how much you’ve drank, or how much is left! You’re just wanting it to be over!
“Holy shit, they’re both so close!”
“Broooooooo”
And right as you’re about to finish your drink you hear the sound of a can being crushed right next to you. He won.
“WHAT’S UP…LOSER!” Jungkook shakes his empty, crushed can in your face as you finally finish your own drink.
“Okay, okay. Literally only let you win because it’s your birthday.” You snide playfully.
“Sure y/n, sure.” Jungkook grins down at you, his laughter bounces off the walls and you feel so whole when you hear the sound. He leans forward until his arms are wrapped around you in a quick yet loving hug.
“Whatever you got to say to yourself…loser.” He chuckles out, letting go of you.
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” Your pout is so cute, Jungkook thinks.
Yoongi stands up, his gummy smile lighting up the room as he approaches you two. He stands next to you and asks if you’re alright.
“You’ve already had so much to drink, I’m just making sure you can make it back to the sofa.” Yoongi’s shoulders shake as he laughs.
“She can handle herself.” You hear Jungkook say in a somewhat serious tone, “She knows how to drink.” He tries to say a little more lightly.
“But she doesn’t really have to do the penalty, right?” Yoongi asks.
“No, I definitely do.” You laugh out, “Where’s the shot, huh?”
Jungkook gives you a silly looking smirk as he heads towards the kitchen to fetch you that shot. He’s only gone for a moment when you realize he has returned with the liquid of fire.
“For you, princess.”
You roll your eyes at his little nick name he’s given you but you cannot help the blush that creeps on your cheeks…
“Please…please.” You pant, rolling your hips into his as you meet his desperate thrusts.
“Please what, princess?” he breathes out heavily, “Told you that when you’re with—” He begins fucking into you faster, “When you’re with me…to use your words.” His pace is bruising, causing you to choke on the air around you.
The little nick name causing you to remember something you have tied burying.
“I think you should take one too, since it is your birthday after all.” You tease.
“But I’m the winner…” Jungkook pouts, his bottom lip jutting out so far.
“Come on, I bet you won’t.” Jimin pipes in.
“Yeah dude.” You hear Nick say.
“FINE!” Jungkook throws his hands up in defeat, “But you have to go pour it for me.” He says, looking at you.
“Done deal, baby.”
“Pour me one too.” Vanessa walks up to you, her strap on her shoulder sliding down.
“Oh?” you ask, but you nod your head in approval and head towards the kitchen to pour two more shots.
You return with the shots, but feel your stomach drop when you see Jungkook and Vanessa laughing together, her hand laying on his chest, his arm wrapped around her waist.
“Oh!” Jungkook looks at you and smiles, “The shots!”
“Yeah…”
And then Min Yoongi is at your side with his own shot, he looks at you and gives you a sweet smile and eyes full of understanding.
“Let’s take them.” He says. His hand going to yours, he squeezes it tight and you feel yourself trying to breathe.
“Here you go.” You hand the two shots to Jungkook and Vanessa, they take them and you four look at one another before raising your glasses.
“Happy birthday, Jungkook.” You whisper, taking the shot.
Hours pass, and things are starting to wind down, you think. Jin, Namjoon and Hobi are at the front door saying their goodbyes and you feel your time is coming soon too.
“Us too.” Trina says, “Our uber is almost here.” Her and Holly gather their things and make their way out the door.
“Jimin, you coming with us?” Trina asks.
“Um, what about you y/n?” Jimin makes it to your side, his hand going to rub your shoulder.
“You guys go without me, I’m going to help clean up. Hostess duties!” You salute towards your friends and they giggle.
“Okay babe, I’ll see you soon?” Jimin goes in for a tight hug and you hug him back even tighter.
“Yeah.”
“I’ll help you clean up.” Yoongi offers, but you shake your head.
“No, I couldn’t ask that. Me and Vanessa got it. You go home too, it’s so late. I will come by to see you soon though.”
“Are you sure?” Yoongi asks as he catches Jungkook watching you two. “Well, if you insist y/n.” he inches towards you and to your surprise, you feel his lips leave a small kiss on your cheek. Yoongi smirks when he sees Jungkook react. Jungkook glares at the boy and Yoongi feels like hopefully he helped enough tonight.
“What was that for?” you feel yourself turn red.
“Nothing.” He whispers before he’s turning around and walking out of the door.
You are left here shocked and confused but you cannot help but smile at Yoongi’s small gesture. He really is too sweet.
“Well,” you turn around to face Jungkook and Vanessa, “Let’s clean up,” you say to Vanessa, “And then I’ll get out of your hair.”
“Actually,” Vanessa curls her lips upwards, “I am feeling quite tired.” Her eyes find yours, “So maybe Jungkook can help you clean up.”
“You’re going home already?” Jungkook looks confused. He was probably expecting birthday sex or some shit.
“Mhm.” She breathes out easily, “See you later babe.” She leans over and pecks his cheek, you immediately twist your head to look away. Vanessa notices and she fucking smiles that sly ass smile. “See you later, y/n.”
And with that she is out of the apartment, leaving just you and Jungkook and Nick and Alien Bro.
“We will be out on the balcony smoking, if you guys want to join.” Nick offers to you, but you’re shaking your head no.
“Nah, you guys enjoy.” Jungkook says. Nick and Alien bro (You really got to learn this dudes name) are opening the back door and leaving you guys for the balcony.
“And then there was two.” Jungkook jokes, he chews on his lips as he watches you begin the cleaning up process. You get a large black trash bag and start throwing away the empty beer bottles and other trash around the living room and kitchen.
“Help me clean, birthday boy.”
Jungkook grins at you and starts helping, he’s gathering the shot glasses and setting them in the kitchen sink. You two work like this for around 10-15 minutes when the place is finally looking like his apartment again.
“Well, I guess that’s it.” You set the last trash bag in the kitchen, “You and Nick can take these out later, right?” “Yes, y/n. You did enough, I swear.” Jungkook smiles at you. “Hey, where’s your bracelet?” he dangles his wrist around, showing you his.
“Oh…” You dig around in your pockets until you finally find the piece of jewelry.
“Let me.” Jungkook stands closer to you, reaching his hand out, expecting you to hand over the bracelet. You place it in his hand and he grabs your wrist and clips the bracelet on.
“There.” He breathes out, “Never take it off.” He half jokes.
“You really like it?”
“I really love it.” Jungkook pulls you in for a hug, but he’s letting go much faster than you would like.
“Wanna chill for a bit?” He asks you, his hands still on your arms from your hug that you just shared.
“For a bit, sure.”
You two walk to the living room sofa and plop down, the long day finally catching up to you. It’s around 1 am now, you’ve been running around all day.
“So…” Jungkook looks at you with an unreadable expression, “What’s going on with you and this Yoongi guy?”
“What do you mean?”
“Was tonight like, a date for you two?”
“What? No?”
“Really? Could of fooled me and like, everyone else.”
“He was just joking…I think.” You groan into your hands, and laugh. “Why?”
“I was just wondering.” He turns to face forward, his face hardening as he thinks. “Is he going to be like, your boyfriend?”
“What?!” you choke on your spit, “Yoongi is my friend.”
“Does he know that?” Jungkook continues to look forward, “He was all over you.”
“He definitely was not all over me. Oh my god. What are you getting so crazy for?”
Crazy. That’s the word you use, but he knows you mean jealous. Jungkook sits here, biting on his bottom lip. He has to admit, he doesn’t like this ‘crazy’ feeling. He feels like he’s suffocating just remembering you with Yoongi tonight. He has no right to feel crazy or jealous. He has a girlfriend for fucks sake!
“I just hope he’s treating you right.”
“He’s just a friend Jungkook. But you know what? And if he was trying to date me?”
Jungkook feels his chest tighten, not liking the idea already.
“Then like I said, I hope he’s treating you right.” He says more softly, turning to look at you again.
“Did you enjoy your birthday?”
“It was nice, thank you.”
“What’s your favorite birthday in your life so far?”
Jungkook tilts his head as he thinks, rocking it side to side. He folds his arms behind his head and lets out a long breath.
“There’s two I can think of.” He says, “When I was 10 all I wanted to do was see one of those drive thru zoo things. But I wasn’t expecting much because I guess birthdays and holidays were stressful for my parents…” he takes a deep breath, “they always fought so much and so I didn’t think we would be doing anything for my birthday at all. But they for once, they got along this day. They took me to the zoo and I just remember being so on edge like something may go wrong…but it never did, it was a perfect day.”
“I bet 10 year old Jungkook was so cute.”
“I was the cutest!”
“And what’s the second?”
“Sophomore year of college.” He states quickly making you choke on air. Really? That birthday of all birthdays?
“Jungkook, there has to be a better one than that…” you begin, “We literally didn’t even do anything.”
It seemed everyone happened to become busy the day of Jungkook’s birthday, everyone except you. You and Jungkook spent the day just the two of you in his dorm room watching movies and playing video games. You didn’t even buy him a present, much too broke!
“That day meant a lot to me.” Jungkook explains, “You didn’t leave my side, no matter what.”
“Well, you were my best friend.”
“And now?” Jungkook turns his head to face you, “Am I your best friend now?”
“Jungkook…” you caress his thigh, “Of course.”
Jungkook throws his head back as he smiles that bunny smile and you can’t help but giggle.
“Were you worried?”
“So worried.” He continues to laugh, “You’re my best friend too.”
~~~~~
October
“I don’t know guys!” you whine, bringing the cup of coffee in for a sip. “Marketing…can someone even be passionate about that?”
“What did I say y/n? You’re so concerned if you’re passionate or not, why don’t you start off small—finding something you just like.” Yoongi offers his piece of advice but you groan.
“What do you think Tae?” you point your head in his direction, “Wait, I am asking one of the most passionate people I know.” You complain.
“I agree with Yoongi, y/n.” Taehyung says, he drinks his water in gulps.
“Of course, who wouldn’t agree with Yoongi?” You hit your head on the table a few times.
You three are seated in Yoongi’s record shop in the cozy corner of the store, discussing the burden of dreams.
“I mean, guys.” You begin, “I don’t want to be making cookies forever.”
“But I really like them.” Yoongi whispers.
“Me too,” Taehyung says as he shoves a sugar cookie down his throat. “So good.”
“Guys, you aren’t helping.”
“Honestly y/n…” Yoongi stands from his seat to get some more coffee, “Stop trying to force a dream to happen. It will come to you naturally, just trust in that.”
“You make it sound so easy.” You hand Taehyung another cookie and he takes it with a grin.
“So y/n…” Taehyung swallows down the last bits of the cookie before he’s turning to face you in his chair, “How was Jungkook’s birthday, I forgot to ask.”
“It went really well actually.”
“Why do you say ‘actually’?” Taehyung laughs, “Were you expecting it to go bad?”
“It’s not that…I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Is it because of Vanessa?” Yoongi comes back with two fresh coffees.
“Maybe.”
“That’s his girlfriend, right? I just don’t get it. Should we come up with an evil plan to break them up?” Taehyung snickers.
“Tae, chill.” You giggle.
“I’m joking but I am also totally serious.” He comments. “Anyway guys, I gotta head back to the museum. But same time next week?”
“You know it.” You blow on your hot coffee, waving him goodbye.
The last few weeks the three of you meet up for coffee (Tae usually brings his own drink of choice, says coffee is too bitter for him) and chit chat just like now. It’s an interesting group but you feel comfortable. After time has passed, forgiving and moving on from Taehyung’s crushing you has gotten easier and now you even find his friendship to be quite valuable. You guess they weren’t kidding when they say time heals all wounds.
“Are you two ever going to tell me what happened between you? You were so tense when he first started hanging out.” Yoongi says, observant as usual.
“I will. But another day,” you smile.
“No rush.” Yoongi drinks his coffee slowly, “Whenever you’re ready.”
“By the way, did it work?” Yoongi asks between sips.
You can’t help but raise your brows in question,
“Did what work?”
“Did Jungkook say anything? About being jealous?” He gives you a smirk.
“What are you talk—wait, were you purposely trying to be affectionate with me to see if Jungkook would get a rise out of it?” You ask, completely shocked. That seems almost out of character for Yoongi!
“I tried. I’m a little awkward being the first to show affection, “ he admits, “But for you, my friend, I was willing to try.” He gives you a shy smile and you feel your heart race.
“Yoongi—”
“You really don’t even have to answer because I know the truth. I could see it on his face, but I was curious if he said anything to you.”
You think back to Jungkook’s birthday and well…he technically did say something to you. He was being a little crazy (jealous) but you cannot understand why. Jungkook is your friend and not to mention he has a girlfriend.
“Sorry to disappoint Yoongs, but he did not.” You decide to say.
“Did you know you avoid all eye contact when you want to lie.” Yoongi takes another sip of his coffee, his sly smile telling you he knows the truth.
“Jeez, why do you pick up on things so quickly?!” you groan, “I can’t even tell one little nothing lie in front of you.”
“Maybe you shouldn’t try to lie to me then.” He laughs. “So what did he say?”
“He just—I don’t know. He just…wanted to know what was up with you basically.”
Yoongi opens his mouth to say ‘Ah’ and then continues to drink his coffee.
“He’s not going to be rude to you or anything!” you quickly say, “he’s just a little protective over me, is all.”
“Oh? That’s all?” Yoongi teases.
“Hey…” you set your cup down and fold your hands in your lap, “What makes you think Jungkook feels the same way?”
Yoongi breathes out slowly, his fingers tapping against his mug when he looks up at you and smiles.
“There’s an obvious tension between you two, “ he starts, “The way he looks at you. That honestly gave everything away. His eyes always find you, no matter what.” Yoongi quietly chuckles, “The way he’s threatened by me. He doesn’t even try to hide it.” Yoongi thinks for a moment, “And…you two, the way you are together…god, it’s like watching two people who are in a relationship but don’t know they’re in a relationship.”
“What—what do you mean by that?” you pry further. Curious about your own dynamic with Jungkook that maybe even you can’t see.
“I don’t know like, you guys act like boyfriend and girlfriend already!” he laughs, “That’s when I knew I didn’t stand a chance.”
“Yoongi…”
“It’s okay,” his gummy smile lights up his whole face, “being your friend has been so much more rewarding.”
You feel yourself smile at his words…although, you do feel bad. But keeping a friend like Yoongi around has been amazing. And maybe if you weren’t already in love with someone else…no, you shouldn’t even think that, that’s not fair.
“Thanks Yoongs.”
~~~~~~
“We need to talk.”
Jimin is shoving his way through Jungkook’s front door, his hair pushed back in frustration like his fingers have been running through it for hours.
“Jesus man, it’s like 8 in the fucking morning.” Jungkook’s low, groggy voice booms from his chest.
“This couldn’t wait. I have to be at work at 9 and I’ve been up all night with the same one thing on my mind.” Jimin takes off his shoes and makes his way to the couch.
“And what’s that?” Jungkook asks, clearly annoyed.
“You need to tell y/n how you feel.” Jimin decides to go with the straight forward approach, he does not have the time to beat around the bush today.
Jungkook closes the door and swings around to face Jimin,
“Huh?”
“Listen man, I’ve been racking my brain about it all fucking night. It’s got to be you. You have to do it, she won’t.”
“Why the fuck would I do that?”
“Grow the fucking balls, man!” Jimin sits back on the sofa, his head falling into the cushion.
“Look dude, I don’t know what you—”
“You’re in love with her, you have been since freshmen year. You guys fucked, I know. She didn’t talk to you for however long, I know that too. But come on man, it’s so clear how you both feel.”
Jungkook continues to stand here, not knowing what to say. Where is all this coming from?
“I have a girlfriend, Jimin.”
“Oh please, give me a fucking break.” Jimin stands up, walking towards Jungkook. “There is almost zero chemistry between you two. Like emotional chemistry…I don’t know what your sex life is like…” Jimin holds up a hand, “And I don’t want to know.”
“Wasn’t going to tell you anyway,” Jungkook pouts. “Listen, how can you be so sure y/n would even feel the same way?”
“Can’t you just fucking trust me?” Jimin yells out, exasperated.
“Did she say the words Jimin?” Jungkook becomes very serious, making Jimin shudder. “Did she tell you she has feelings for me?” his dark eyes pierce into Jimin’s.
Jimin looks down at the ground, feeling defeated.
“You know I can’t tell you that.” Jimin finally says, “You just have to have the courage man. Are you really going to go your whole life not telling her? Why torture yourself like that?”
Jungkook stands here feeling so lost, and fucking emotional. Like, he could god damn cry about it.
“Because,” Jungkook sniffles into his sleeve. “It’s guaranteed she would be in my life. I can’t risk losing her. I couldn’t handle that man…” Jungkook begins to choke up.
Jimin walks closer to Jungkook and pulls him in for a tight hug, Jungkook keeps his arms to his side.
“I know. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Jimin whispers.
“I think though…that there will be a moment where you finally have the courage…”
“I don’t know.”
“You will, Jungkook. When the timing is right…but I don’t know when that is for you two.”
“I really do love her…” Jungkook allows a few tears to slip from his closed eyes into Jimin’s shoulder. “I’m so frustrated like, all the time.” He admits, “Seeing her, talking to her, I just want to tell her how I feel. I hate how hard I have to try just to stay in the zone of friendship. But you don’t understand the risk…” Jungkook leans back, pulling away from Jimin. “If she doesn’t feel the same, I could lose her.” His puffy eyes avoid Jimin. “Can I handle a loss like that again?”
“But she…” Jimin has to bite his tongue…seeing his two best friends like this hurts his heart beyond belief.
“Yeah, I understand.” Jimin decides to say, “But I think you might be surprised.”
Jungkook pulls his brows together, his face scrunching up and he scoffs.
“Maybe, but maybe not.”
“I’m sorry to bring this all on you so early in the morning…I’ve just been so worried about you two…” Jimin starts to put his shoes back on.
“Maybe you could stay until you really need to leave for work? You still go like 45 minutes, right?” Jungkook practically begs with sad, soft eyes.
“Sure.” Jimin takes his shoes back off and grabs a hold of Jungkook’s shoulder, “Let’s sit down for a while.”
The two boys head to the couch and take a seat, leaving little space between them. Jungkook needs the presence of another human being right now, he needs to feel real live warmth. Jimin wishes he could mend Jungkook’s cracked heart but he knows only you can do that. But Jimin can try his best. The two sit in comfortable silence, the only sound that can be heard is Jungkook’s light sniffling and Jimin humming a soft tune.
“It’s almost 9.” Jimin mentions regretfully.
“I know. Thanks for staying for a bit.”
“Of course.” Jimin rises from the couch, “You guys are my best friends but you two sure are fucking idiots.” He smiles and makes his way to leave.
~~~~~~
Bored. So fucking bored. Trina and Holly went out for dinner tonight and you were not invited! You kind of wonder what’s going on between them…but that’s a thought for another day, right now you are so fucking bored.
It’s Friday night and you don’t know what to do with yourself. Jimin has some party he’s going to tonight but you didn’t really feel like going so you rejected his invitation, Jin and the guy’s invited you over for a cookout but you said no because you didn’t feel like driving all the way to Jin’s place—you know, lazy.
And you haven’t heard from Jungkook all day so he’s probably tired from work or worse—with Vanessa. But would it hurt to try? To see what he’s up to?
y/n 9:04pm
hi
Jungkook 9:10pm
Hi
y/n 9:12pm
Whatcha up to tonight?
Jungkook 9:13pm
Nothing really, you?
y/n 9:13pm
nothing either…
y/n 9:13pm
Wanna have a movie night with some wine?
Jungkook 9:20pm
Sure:)
Jungkook 9:23pm
Lemme guess, I have to bring the wine
y/n 9:23pm
Bingo!
Jungkook 9:50pm
I’m almost there
Not even 5 minutes later you hear your door being knocked on, and you yell a ‘come in’. Jungkook pushes the door open and finds you sitting on the couch wrapped up in your favorite blanket. He shuts the door behind him, and walks to the kitchen for some wine glasses. You two only nod at one another in greeting, getting comfortable in each others presence.
“I brought 2 bottles,” Jungkook says, “One for you, one for me.”
“Wow, you’re so smart.” You smile up at him and his heart clenches in his chest. Your smile is so special, it’s so soft and so fucking pretty he almost cannot handle it.
“Y-Yeah.” He sets the glasses down on the table that sits in front of the sofa. “What movie do you have in mind?”
“You can choose.”
“Iron Man?” “No, not that.”
“Fine.” He pouts, “Let’s find something new on Netflix.”
An hour into some random drama, you find yourself getting sleepy.
“Wakey wakey.” You feel Jungkook’s breath on your ear, you open your eyes a little wider to prove your consciousness.
“I am awake…hey,” you suddenly get an idea, “Remember a little while ago you said you felt like our friendship kind of started over?”
“Hm? Yeah?”
“Would if we do?”
“I don’t get it?” Jungkook asks clearly confused.
“Let’s play a game! Of getting to know each other better. Everything out on the table.” You say with a pleased smile, obviously loving your own idea.
“hmmmmm…” Jungkook wraps his blanket closer around his body, “Sure.”
“Yay! I’ll pull out a list of questions from the internet.” You get your phone and google a list of questions. “You ready?” you say with a wink.
“I guess so.” He playfully shrugs his shoulders and shows you a small smile.
“Okay one…What’s your favorite way to spend a day off?”
“hmm…sleeping in, working out, playing video games, making videos, sleeping some more, hanging out with you.”
“Wow, honored.” You tease. “For me, it’s sleeping all day.”
“That’s it? That’s your whole answer?” Jungkook giggles.
“What type of music are into to?”
“y/n…” Jungkook whines, “You already know these answers…”
“We’re pretending we don’t!”
“Fine, I like almost all genres but I really prefer ballads.”
“I like music with meaningful lyrics,” you say.
“I agree.” Jungkook grins at you.
“Next…Do you have a favorite holiday. Why or why not?”
Jungkook nibbles on his lips as he thinks…is he honest?
“I use to hate holidays.” He admits softly, slightly slurring thanks to the wine, “But now it’s Christmas and New Year’s. And why? Both reasons are because of you.”
You feel your cheeks become warmer and probably pinker.
“Mine too.” You say quickly, “Next,” you are in a rush to change the subject. “Do you want a family of your own?”
“One day, yes. With the right person…”
“I’m the same.” You scroll through the questions, “If you had only one sense…hearing, touch, sight, etc, which would you want?”
“Touch. Imagine not being able to feel things?” Jungkook asks, he thinks about not being able to feel the soft touch of sheets on a bed, the feel of your hair between his fingers, your skin, your lips—wait, he needs to chill. “Yeah, touch.”
“Really? I would choose sight.” You say, “Who do you admire most in this world?”
“Mom.” Jungkook whispers, “She was so strong, she went through so much yet still found the strength to love me.”
“You.” Your hand finds Jungkook’s, you hold on to him softly, “My answer is you.”
“y/n…” Jungkook leans into your side, “Thank you.”
You clear you throat and continue scrolling through your phone, looking for the next question.
“If you found out today is your last day on Earth, what would you do?”
“Exactly what I’m doing right now.”
“Honestly? Me too.” You whisper, you feel your heart beginning to race as you and Jungkook admit that if it were your last day, you would spend it together. Somehow the thought almost seems romantic to you…that’s obviously your imagination but you can dream.
“What’s the last thing you do at night?”
Jungkook wiggles his brows at you and you hit his arm, laughing.
“Gross.” You giggle. “Something besides that.”
“What? You think it’s gross to mast—”
“Don’t!” you yell out laughing. “Don’t be gross.”
“Everyone does it y/n…I bet even you.” Jungkook voice goes low. “in fact, I have a question for you.” Jungkook scoots closer to you, “When was the last time you got yourself off?” your eyes go wide, “It’s not like you’re seeing anyone…unless you and Yoon—”
“No!” You begin to panic, “I’m not seeing anyone, you’re right.”
Jungkook releases a long breath and he smiles, “Thought so.” Then he’s scooting even closer to you.
“How do you touch yourself y/n?” He slurs out, “With your fingers only? Perhaps you use a vibrator?”
You push your head back in shock, there’s no way in hell Jungkook just asked you that? Is he drunk? Barely.
“Why do you want to know that?” you scoot a little closer to him too.
“Best friends know this type of stuff about each other all the time, don’t they?”
“Not really…but I’ll play. I use both.”
Jungkook raises a brow in amusement, he bites on his bottom lip as his smirks at you.
“You own a vibrator?” Jungkook chuckles darkly, “How come I didn’t know?”
“Why would I tell you that?”
“I bet Jimin knows.”
“Fine, he does.”
Jungkook narrows his eyes at you as he tries to hold in his slight laughter, his hand comes to his mouth and he chuckles into it.
“Thought so…when’s the last time you used it?”
“Last night before bed.”
“So, it’s the last thing you did at night?” Jungkook points his finger at you knowingly and you can’t help but laugh.
“Okay, I see where this is going. Fine, I get. We all masturbate. It’s completely normal and not gross and a totally valid answer for something you do before bed.” You throw your hands up as you giggle.
“Thank you.” Jungkook knees touch yours as he scoots just an inch closer, “But I wasn’t trying to make a point, I was genuinely curious about you.” He admits in a deep voice and you squeeze your thighs together, an action that does not go unnoticed by him. His eyes land to your lap and he chuckles. His voice is so low and inviting as he speaks, “Are you curious about me too?”
“What do you mean?”
“About when’s the last time I—”
“Fine, when’s the last time?” you ask lightly.
“Right before I came here.” He admits easily.
“Interesting.”
You and Jungkook stare at one another for what feels like at least an hour but in reality probably seconds. But his dark gaze is so raw and powerful, you find yourself leaning into his space.
“The last time I used my vibrator was yes, last night. But the last time I touched myself was tonight. Before you arrived.”
Jungkook nods his head in understanding, or maybe it’s approval? Either way he nods his head as a sly smile creeps on his lips.
“Can I ask you what you thought about?” Even Jungkook widens his eyes in surprise as he asks that. Where did that confidence come from? “Sorry that’s TMI.” He quickly rushes to say, not wanting to really hear your answer because he shouldn’t know what you fantasize about especially if he’s not in said fantasies.
You lean your head back and snicker. You wish you had the fucking courage to tell him the truth. Him. You thought about him.
In your fantasy his head was between your legs, licking you up and making you squirm. He would moan into your greedy cunt, basking in your juices. God, you can just picture it now. His mouth and nose covered in you, the shine on his face evidence of how well he’s eaten you. His fingers still buried inside you as he lifts his head up to smirk down at you, his hair a fucking mess from how much you have tugged on it.
You’d be lying if you said you weren’t thinking about it right now and getting so heavily turned on. Your chest heaves just a little more than usual, and there’s an ache between your legs that you wish Jungkook would soothe. Your fantasy of him going down on you? You took that straight from your memories.
“Not going to say anything?” Jungkook leans in a little closer.
“Sorry, just thinking.”
“About…?”
“You.”
Jungkook’s eyes expand as he processes what you just say until—
“Wait, wait. That came out wrong.” Your hands scramble to hold on to his shoulders. “I mean, I was thinking about you. But not like that.” You lie. Because you have to lie.
“Oh…right, that makes sense.” Jungkook visibly deflates at your confession.
“Anyway, yeah. That’s a TMI for sure.” You laugh awkwardly and Jungkook leans back away from you.
“For sure.” Jungkook leans back on the sofa, “So, what’s the next question?”
“Ever had a threesome?” you ask from your own brain.
“You already know I have.”
“With two girls or with another guy…?”
“Two girls.”
“Would you ever with another guy?”
“Maybe if it’s with a girl that doesn’t mean something to me…but if it’s with someone I care about, probably not. I think I may be too possessive. Don’t wanna share.”
“Ah, I see.”
“What about you?”
“I would do both.” You admit. “Sounds like fun…”
“It is fun,” Jungkook laughs, “But there’s something special about just being with one person, if it’s special…”
“Have you ever had sex with someone special?”
“Yes.”
Oh. Jungkook’s never been in a serious relationship since you’ve known him so you weren’t expecting him to answer that with a yes…but he is with Vanessa now. So obviously…
“I see.”
“What’s the next question?”
“I’m looking up a new list. It’s kind of sexy, is that okay?”
“A list of dirty questions? I’m down.” Jungkook smirks and you feel the heat between your legs grow.
“Okay the first one is asking if you’re a virgin and I think the whole town knows the answer to that…”
“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?!”
You laugh out, “Nothing, nothing.” Then continue scrolling, “Okay, opinion on shower sex?”
“Hmm, I’ve done, and I will do it again.”
“For me, it’s a little uncomfortable but I’ll do it,” you say, “boob or butt guy?”
“Fuck. Both of them, can I say both?” Jungkook pleads and you giggle.
“Sure, both.” Your eyes light up when you find the next question. “Oooh. What is your most embarrassing sex story?”
“Oh god…okay. When I was in high school I was getting head from this girl…”
“Uh huh…and then?”
“We got caught by our teacher and that’s a total mood killer right?”
“Right?”
“Well, when the teacher was scolding me I popped another boner. And I was wearing sweats so it was super obvious and she was trying so hard not to make it obvious. But I don’t know, my body betrayed me.”
“You got hard from getting scolded?”
“Apparently.”
You burst out into giggles, the story absolutely killing you. Who does that? Who pops a boner from getting scolded…by their fucking teacher?
“Your turn, your turn.”
“Okay…one time I was giving head…”
“Uh huh…and then?” he copies you.
“And I guess I swallowed his cum too fast because it shot out of my nose like milk.”
“What the fuck y/n.” Jungkook laughs out hysterically. “That’s so awesome.”
“It wasn’t awesome Jungkook, it was embarrassing.”
“Perspective.”
“In what world is someone’s perspective on this awesome?” “Mine.”
“Well, you’re fucking weird.
“Maybe so.” Jungkook continues to laugh, “What’s next?”
“Do you prefer to give or receive?”
“Who doesn’t love to receive? That’s obvious. But me? I am a giver, 100%”
And he’s right. Hence why you’re able to use the memory of him going down on you as good masturbation material.
“I see.”
“I think I am a giver too.” You look down at your phone, “But who doesn’t love to receive?”
“You do give nicely.” Jungkook whispers, “Anyway what’s the next one?”
“Do you like sexting?”
“Fucking love it. I love the dirty words and pictures.” He admits.
“Yeah, me too.”
What would it be like to be texting Jungkook throughout the work day, sending one another your dirtiest fantasies and pictures to go along with it.
“I’ll read the next one now…If I came home from work stressed, how you do you relax me?” your eyes go wide when you realize, “Wait, pretends it’s asking about someone else. So a girl you’re with comes home from work stressed, how do you relax her?”
Jungkook is quiet for a few moments, he chews on his bottom lip and breathes out heavily.
“How would I relax you? I mean, some girl?”
“Y-Yes.”
“First, I would kiss you breathless.”
“You mean her.”
“Right. I would kiss her lips over and over, taking off one article of clothing at a time, sit her down on the couch while I make my way into the kitchen…pour her a glass of her favorite wine and hand it to her. Then I would kiss down her body, telling her sweet words. How much I love her, how much I missed her today, how much she means to me. I will kiss down until I am taking off her pants along with her underwear…” “And then?” you breathe out.
“Kiss her sweet, soft skin…taste her. Taste how fucking good she tastes. Eat her out while she sips on her wine…”
“Oh nice.” You laugh a little.
“Make her come all over my tongue, getting her drunk on her orgasm.”
“And her wine.” You point out.
“Yes, both. After she comes, I will kiss back up her body and hold her.” Jungkook releases short breath after the other. “Make her feel wanted.”
“That does sound relaxing…”
“You like?”
“Yes.”
“Then maybe—”
“Next question is ‘What turns you on almost instantly?”
“Dirty talk.”
“I see.”
“What—”
“You have to answer too, remember?”
“My stomach being touched.” You admit. “How do you feel about toys?”
“Not against them, could be fun to try out.”
“I agree…how do you feel about blindfolds?”
“You answer first.” Jungkook says shyly.
“I’m into it.”
“Being blinded? Or blinding someone?”
“Both? Yes, both.”
“Fuck, me too.” He folds his arms behind him as he leans back further into the sofa.
“Both for you too?”
“Yes. It would be boring if I was only into one thing right?”
You laugh, “Yes, I think we think similarly.”
“Interesting.”
“Very.” You smile at him and he smirks, “Would you like to watch me touch myself?”
“Yes—”
“—Wait, like your partner, not me.” You both say at the same time.
“Oh, well yes.” Jungkook says again. “Watching your fingers travel down to your pussy, rubbing your clit…well, not you but you get my point.” He says, his breathing becoming heavy again.
“Oh. I would also like to watch you.”
“But not me.”
“Exactly.”
“Spit or swallow?”
“I like a girl who swallows.”
“I like to swallow most times and if I don’t swallow it’s because I’m letting the guy come on my face or my tits or—”
“God damn it, y/n.” Jungkook breathes out erratically. His hand goes to his crotch as he tries to hide his growing member.
“Rough or sensual?”
“Fuck. Both, definitely both.”
“I agree. Why not both all the time?” you squeeze your thighs together again as you watch Jungkook shift uncomfortably in his seat on the couch.
“Would you let me pleasure you as you drive? I mean, your partner. Sorry it’s just the way the questions read…”
“Yes. I would.”
“Seems a bit unsafe…but I would give it a try.” You say, “Do you like your hair to be pulled?” you ask with a smirk, already knowing the answer.
“Fucking love it.” He admits between heavy breaths, “But I like to pull hair too.” He winks.
“I do too, but I prefer being the one pulling.” You wink back. “Are you quiet during sex?”
“I—I don’t know…Am I?” Jungkook looks into your eyes, and you blank. Is he actually referring to the time you two had sex? Without him getting weird? “You aren’t the quietest.” You admit, “But it’s so fucking hot.”
“Well, you definitely aren’t quiet.” He says, “Can barely touch you and you’re already whimpering out.”
“Depends who the guy is.”
“Well, when it’s with me…sorry, I shouldn’t bring that up.”
“Right…” your fingers find their way into Jungkook’s hair, “But why not?”
“y/n…” he warns and you chuckle.
“What?” you decide to play innocent. “It was so long ago, Jungkook. We should be able to talk about it by now.”
But Jungkook can’t. Because although it’s almost been 4 years, it’s still so fresh for him. Not just the feeling of being inside you but the emotional shit he was feeling too.
“I’ll tell you one thing and one thing only about that night,” Jungkook decides to say, his hand goes to yours and gently places it back in your lap. “It felt so fucking good.” He whispers out and you feel all the heat in your body rush to your aching pussy.
“Oh.” You breathe out erratically. “I guess, I would have to agree.”
“Should we sleep soon?” Jungkook leans back as he asks you this.
“Don’t you want me to share one thing about that night?”
“…Sure.”
“You…felt so…good…inside me…” you say between deep breaths.
“You felt even better, y/n.”
It’s Saturday morning, and you find yourself waking up on the couch, a big blanket draped around your body and you can’t help but snuggle into it, not wanting to get up quite yet.
On the other side of the couch is a still sleeping Jungkook, his light snores filling your ears. You two didn’t even finish your wine last night, so you are waking up hang over free. The sun is shining today, it’s rays peeking through your window blinds and you want to throw the blanket over your head to hide yourself from the brightness but you decide to actually wake up and get up instead.
You throw the blanket off your body and on to Jungkook, who gratefully takes it and cuddles deeper into the covers. You stand up and head towards the bathroom to wash up, turning on a hot shower.
You wonder what you’ll be up to today, will you stay in? Go out? Hang with the girls? By the way, did they ever come home last night? You stop by Holly’s room to find it empty. Interesting, you guess they went to Trina’s.
The shower is ready for you so you slip in and let the warm water cascade over your tired body. You shampoo, condition and wash your body, when you hear insistent knowing on the bathroom door.
“y/n!!! I gotta pee!!” Jungkook’s worried voice is heard over the running water, “That’s it, I’m coming in okay?!”
And before you can respond, you hear the door being swung open and Jungkook lifting the toilet seat lid up and releasing himself. You fucking laugh. He literally says ‘Aaahhh’ for the same amount of time he is peeing.
“Fucking finally, I thought I was going to piss myself.” He says when he’s finishing up.
“Sorry.” You reply lamely. “Shower felt too good to leave.”
“Well, hurry up so we can go get something to eat. I’m so hungry!”
“Okay, okay.” And with that, Jungkook is leaving the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.
You finish washing up, stepping out of the shower and drying off. You quickly leave the bathroom in just your towel to head to your bedroom. Thankfully, Jungkook is on the couch watching some show on Netflix—too busy to notice your half naked state.
You get dressed in a rush, not wanting Jungkook to wait much longer for you. You settle for some jeans and a cute yellow shirt.
“I like yellow on you.” Jungkook says when he sees you. “Pretty.”
You are sure your cheeks are turning a nice shade of red at his compliment but you cover them with your hands to hide yourself.
“Thanks JK.”
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cinemacereal · 2 years
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people gotta stop romanticizing college man AKA: being both in charge of the narrative and subject to its inclinations is some whimsical horseshit and i do not fuckin abide
aight so im in film school right. and like, people really gotta stop romanticizing college bro. i don't even fuckin know if I actually like the thing I'm going to school for. i chose to be here and every day i wonder if i even like filmmaking, which is ludicrous of course i do.
however, this is far more nuanced a question than just the simple "does this thing make me happy." my whole goddamn career depends upon the far more loaded question of "do this thing make me happy enough i could do it for conceivably the next 50+ years and not prefer to launch myself directly into the sun than get up for work one more day." which is significantly harder to answer.
especially considerin i am in no way ignorant to the fact that im more than certain that future me will look upon current me with the same wallowing acid bath of disgust i hold for past me.
therefore i am in a particularly stupid and unsolvable paradox. If i am to determine that my future lies with the complicated and frustrating art of filmmaking, i need to do some soul searching and finish my character arc. However in order to have said character arc, i need to have,my life pointed in a direction so that the metatextual narrative doesn't crash and burn
i wish i could put my whole life on pause, figure myself out, then go back into it with a newfound sense of purpose. its like my author wrote like,, half of my story and then said "im bored" and left me in the vast expansive wastelands of the tumblr draft section, where all good posts go to die, and never actually got around to figuring out the second half of my epic character arc.
like, it’s so weird to say this but I feel like I’m at that point in my narrative or I’m about to get some serious character development??? my identity is finally coming into being and i have a sense of who i am in the metatextual narrative of this story, or at least the many different versions of myself that simultaneously exist and do not exist within the narrative at any given moment. like, at i am able to hold an internal socratic dialog with the 6 other versions of myself i am consciously aware of, which has to stand for somethin in the ridiculous self examination im doing for you, correct?
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but the thing about character development is that you cant exactly have the aforementioned internal socratic dialog of you have fuckin english homework due. so what ends up actually happening is you procrastinate your big enlightenment for a more convenient time in order to keep the trains running on time. because god fucking forbid the train stops and you have an identity crisis. like everything functions fine when you keep the train moving, but if your train is falling apart you cant exactly power through a broken axle.
like oh shit the wheels are falling off and we’re either going to keep moving forward or the train is going to careen off the cliff of mental illness, and then when you DO inevitably crash, you say oh fuck i could never have predicted this. i am irretrievably fucked. except you DID predict this, all the way when your worst situation was a loose screw. but no, nobody takes you seriously until you crash and the whole train car fuckin obliterates itself on the mental illness tree like a small child running face-first into a glass screen door and watching with abject horror as the glass spiders on impact and shatters dramatically, covering the child in the snowflakes of his own grievous error.
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i was in a boat where i was honestly doing pretty okay, and my workload is just light enough my ADHD doesn’t ruin my life 24/7 but i have one(1) singular negative thing happen and im all out of whack
plus, it doesn’t help that like,, i suddenly now have all these passions for writing and drawing for my buddies and making shitty jpeg gifs for my blog but i dont have any energy for film?? reader i willingly started this blog, made most of these gifs myself, and wrote out this insane, self-indulgent dialog because i, personally had the passion to do so. (wait can writing self-indulgent rantblogs be a career. because i'd be so good at that dude. i can finally stop ranting in my friends dms at like 3am)
im fuckin terrified 24/7 that i actually dont wanna do film and i wish i had time to figure that out.
like im a rad dude okay.
im one cool motherfucker, and being a cool motherfucker means i have like,,, a Lot of interests and talents that suit me in my role as said cool motherfucker.
in summary, i’m rad as shit.
this is known
the issue though is that my particular interests do not neatly fit themselves together in a way that a career path is easily laid out for me. i am such a jack of all trades that i could theoretically work in almost any department and become successful.
but, since i am only a man, my general quest is self-fulfillment, right? like the whole goddamn point of being on this stupid spinning rock of infinite horseshit is enlightenment. maslow's hierarchy of needs and all that shit.
so how, the fuck, am i supposed to figure out my particular position in life if i can conceivably find a career in like 6 different wildly divergent paths if i don't spend the next ten fuckin years trying each of them on like a little girl figuring out which disney princess halloween costume dress really says “me”
and i thought i was ahead of the game on this front. i had my first midlife crisis when i was 12 goddamnit. I've been staring at my own splintered identity since i started eating fuckin crayons, you'd think i'd have this shit sorted by now. i am a goddamn philosophical stable boy, mucking out the horseshit that is my psychological identity and self-actualization issues, except the horse in question is also in fact me, and he refuses to stop shitting. it is an endless stream of horse shit coated psyche turds, glittering in the beams of sunlight peaking through the wooden walls of the stables in question, which i guess within the context of this metaphor would be my skull.
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and to add another layer to the layer cake of horseshit you and i are mucking out and subsequently baking together, our professors act as if on some level we have a full and in-depth understanding of who we are as people enough to like,,, make a fuckin decision about the career that will essentially define the rest of our lives
like, i can barely feed myself and put myself to bed. i am functionally at the same level of self-care as an overgrown infant, and im expected to have any understanding of how i wanna spend my life?
i call bullshit
we’re both intelligent and deeply interesting people, you and i, reader
we’re goddamn genuinely thoughtful and fascinating individuals with a wide variety of interests.
we are, what The Adults would call “well rounded”
and yet we still cannot manage to figure out any of this shit in a way that makes logical sense
and seriously dude, like if they were actually going to prepare us for college i would have appreciated more philosophy on the nature of enlightenment and self-fulfillment, because like yeah i definitely still wouldn’t have figured any of it out, but at least i would know what all the professional question askers up top have to say
or any assistance on the whole “who am i and where do i fit in the world” question?
like surely we could fuckin squeeze that particular topic in between WW2 for the fifth time and analyzing another robert fucking frost poem like motherfucker i don't even understand how basic college shit works, and I'm expected to become the fucking buddha and then also turn in that ten-page paper on whatever the fuck? no, of course not.
we're expected to casually figure out the existential quandary of the universe over gay brunch with the ladies and never fucking touch the topic again. case closed, book shut, the narrative is linear as shit and everyone is pleased, roll credits. like seriously what in the authors cursed name is that about? thats not how people work, author, you cant just expect them to hinge their entire identities off of a paragraph you haphazardly wrote down at 3am!
we need spiritual fulfillment! i need my character to be fleshed out man! i dont care if the author is dead, you get your corpse right back here and explain to me what all this nonsense you conjured up means!
i demand an answer for the existential question of my life's purpose, dammit! as an author it is your responsibility to give the audience a satisfying conclusion, and i, as both a character and audience member am demanding a goddamn explanation! But as both author and character, i am essentially demanding that ouroboros stop eating his own goddamn tail for a minute and explain the transitive property to me, except ouroboros is also me and he doesnt fuckin know what the transitive property is because he hasnt been in 7th grade math class in like 6 years and he is also a fuckin snake.
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