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#im mad at people going out to panic buy
voguewoozi · 2 years
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i've officially completed my txt discography collection and now moving on to the daunting task of collecting the svt discography.......
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toonfinch · 21 days
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this is all i will be saying about the matter because this is stupid as fuck. its a bit long but its mostly for me, not for others to read. but feel free to.
i deleted my post on r/badroommates because i got sick of arguing with idiots online and havent responded to anything because reddit temp banned me for calling myself slurs im allowed to say lmao. im gay and trans. this will go on reddit when i am unbanned. for now it stays here.
i am paying rent, i owe my roommate, u/azzyisjazzy zero dollars. he did cover two months for me because i lost my job and struggled to find a new one, then when i did it lasted like a month because the temp agency ran out of work for me to do. he knows this btw hes just a liar. he heard the phone call because it was on speaker. but i paid him back completely and have paid our most recent bills with zero issue. i am literally at work while writing this. i am on track to make rent just fine. when i said i have $10 its because i had to buy warm weather clothes because i have none. its been hot.
the way he describes my suicidal ideation is making everyone think i do this repeatedly, i did it once. on my tumblr blog, i was not thinking about how it may hurt people, when azzyisjazzy and his friend, u/dizzy_elk_6491 and my friend all had a conversation about it, nobody acted concerned, azzyisjazzy only told me that if i were to actually hurt myself and he never reported it he may lose his job. he was never concerned about me lol. either way, i realized that watching people be suicidal is stressful and i also didnt want to be forcibly hospitalized so i nuked my blog so i can vent safely. i am not suicidal at all and havent been for a while, by the way. interestingly, current roommates friend dizzy_elk_6491 has threatened suicide when things didnt go his way before. he threatened suicide when my friend wanted to break up with him. later my friend found out that dizzy_elk_6491 had been lying about his boundaries in order to keep my friend in a relationship. he did not ignore boundaries whatsoever, there were none said. also, they were literally stupid teenagers.
azzyisjazzy was cool with sharing groceries until suddenly he wasnt, i did not have enough money at the time to also buy the same amount of things he was. we literally went shopping together several times and he told me to pick things out so obviously i thought it was fine? he just sucks at telling people when hes bothered. if he didnt suddenly lock the fridge just as i got a decent job (i was saving up money to pay him back for everything, i still could not afford a substantial amount of groceries) then id have replaced everything i ate. which was like....eggs and milk and coffee. i was mostly eating my own food lol. he ruined all the food i had in the fridge at the time which probably comes out to the amount i owe him for what i ate so ill call that fair.
i do not have bipolar disorder, i do not know where anyone involved got this information. i was on lithium, but it made me worse. gave me worse anxiety and made my eyeballs twitch. not exactly a medication that works. i tried several medications that did not work. i was also accused several times by past roommate, u/finchsexroomate and their friends that i have borderline personality disorder. i thought i might but several doctors told me otherwise. so far the only mental issues im pretty sure i have is major depressive disorder, autism, anxiety, and ocd.
intensive outpatient therapy also did not work, i was having panic attacks every morning because it was not the type of therapy i require.
currently working on getting insurance so i can get trazodone, which works. because i am diagnosed for major depressive disorder. the doctors asked me the pointed questions clearly about bipolar disorder but i dont have manic and depressive episodes. on the other hand, azzyisjazzy has said he is manic. maybe he meant it in a quirky way, but whatever.
i...didnt get mad at azzyisjazzy and his friends for not learning sign language? i dont know asl. i brought it up once or twice as a "wouldnt it be cool if we all learned together" situation, because im deaf and my hearing gets worse monthly. the only sign i was aware anyone knew was when azzyisjazzy and dizzy_elk_6491 said something that contained the words "eat orange" at each other over and over. that doesnt exactly indicate to me they are at a conversational level. either way, i was not "expecting them to communicate in a language i do not speak" lol.
i never threatened a damn thing about the dog. i said she was stressing me out so bad she was triggering my ocd. ocd can cause intrusive violent thoughts. they are not desires, they are based on things you DONT want to do. they are INTRUSIVE. i felt unsafe because the thoughts were so distressing and i could not banish them from my brain. the fact that azzyisjazzy is graduating from nursing school and doesnt understand this is concerning. i thought i biked over a snake this morning and started crying before i saw it move. i threw it in someones yard so it wouldnt get run over. i don't even like hurting bugs. i got mad at azzyisjazzy for making jokes about killing crickets in the house. maybe i am sensitive, sure, judge me how you please. but that doesnt exactly indicate an animal abuser does it?
also, me being a furry and objectumsexual (attraction to objects) has literally nothing to do with anything. its funny, because my azzyisjazzy has told me he pretends to be a dog during sex multiple times. also, he is a furry. or at least was. his fursona is/was a deer. not judging, obviously, its just hypocritical. is it weird? YES. is it harmful? NO. on top of this, azzyisjazzy had me walk the dog a few times after i had said those things. clearly he was not very concerned then. im sure he knows better and is just making shit up to hurt me.
now i don't remember much about my previous living situation with finchsexroomate because i was traumatized and the order of events and details are all mixed up and blurry. i moved in because i was in a motel with my drunk father and (thankfully normal) brother for two years. i was being paid to take care of them, but i wasnt equipped to do so because of my mental health issues. that were being exacerbated by finchsexroomate's reactions to my tone of voice...or something? they would react in ways that freaked me out like getting an attitude or yelling at me. i didnt react well to this which was entirely my fault, causing arguments. this happened a lot. idk why its so hard for anyone involved to understand that we simply did not mesh well together. azzyisjazzy and finchsexroomate have very similar communication styles, or lackthereof. it makes sense why i dont get along with both of them. they suck at communicating boundaries.
it took finchsexroomate months to tell me my tone of voice was upsetting them. they also think i was frequently stewing in anger next to them to hurt them when maybe i was a little annoyed at something and not putting in a ton of effort to look cheery while like...watching tv. or something. every time there was an incident like this, me moving elsewhere was brought up. i was living in a motel for two years before this. you have to be literally stupid to think its easy to find anywhere to live in this economy. obviously did not react well to this and yes it triggered suicidal episodes. but im not unstable if my housing and food and such else is taken care of. now that i have a stable job and can afford everything i need i am perfectly fine. just a bit stressed.
for some reason finchsexroomate thinks i was in love with them and trying to drive a wedge between them and their husband? lol? i said their husband was hot like twice. hes a hairy bear? come on now. theyre just being freaks because im polyamorous. if i had a crush on either of them theyd know, because that is something i hate keeping inside even if i know telling someone will go nowhere.
our living together ended when one night we were watching tv and somehow the topic of my date the next day came up, and finchsexroomate reminded me that our other roommates who would normally take over care when i am gone would also be leaving, so i didnt want to leave them in the house alone or worry about what time i had to be home since i would not be the one driving. i announced id reschedule my date and this upset finchsexroomate so bad that they started yelling at me. i only remember the part where they started yelling fuck you over and over again after i was like dude. its like fucking midnight. we can deal with this tomorrow. their reaction freaked me the fuck out and i did what everyones demonizing me for.....taking the torch we smoked dabs with and brushing it on my wrist for less than half a second, turning it off, and putting it on the table. and then sitting there. finchsexroomate was more at risk of burning the house down than me because i saw them drop the torch while it was still spewing flames twice, and they told me it happened once while i was not there. lol. was my reaction smart? no. did i "try to burn the house down with people inside"? no.
last thing about them, after they kicked me out and gave me zero chance to grab any of my belongings forcing me to pay an exorbitant amount of money for shipping that i could not afford, i said fuck it. they dont deserve my money after all of this. its not like i could just fucking drop almost $800 on it. later when the hurt started to go away i decided id put aside money and then give it all back when ive collected enough, but um. not doing that now lmao.
between then and now i was living with people my dad knew. one of them regularly assumed everything in the house was my fault such as leaving hard water spots on dishes and several times the freezer door was left open (not by me) so he tried attacking me about it and had to be held back by two people. this happened twice. i was also threatened by one of the residents because he was abusive to his girlfriend and i almost pepper sprayed him about it. it got to the point where i had to get a motel room a second time to avoid being hurt. and of course after this is when azzyisjazzy and i started talking.
anyway back to the present. azzyisjazzy thinks i was...listening to him and his bf my first night here just bc i was quiet? i thought they knew i was here lol. i literally cannot eavesdrop. i can hear loud talking and music and dog barking and dog nails on hardwood in my room. sometimes i can hear noises but that doesnt mean i understand what the noises are. at this point im convinced everyone thinks im faking my deafness. do i need to show everyone how scarred my ear drum is? that also has a hole in it?
and i guess this all got worse because i chose to stop being very close friends with all of azzyisjazzys friends. they were a lot of energy. i avoided them a lot because my idea of a good time is being quiet and doing a task together or watching tv or going to the park to look at critters and plants or something. i still tried, i was an audience to their musicals in the kitchen. and hung out when i was able to handle their energy, which was rare. azzyisjazzy thinks i was avoiding his show because i hated him when in reality i was busy with things i felt were more important such as my friend's mental health. azzyisjazzy even told me it was fine and that he understood. i also felt that none of them liked me very much anyway, so i just kind of stopped trying. i know one of them hated me because i got mad at him for making kill all furries jokes in the discord server we were in, and several times after that he would criticize my friends and i for stupid bullshit like putting in the announcements channel to not put chunks of food in the sink that does not have a garbage disposal in it.
the reason there are horses all over my walls is because azzyisjazzy heard gunshots and we were discussing whether or not we should call the cops in the discord server. my friend and i said no because theres no way to prove which direction it came from so on top of the cops not being able to do anything, we have black neighbors that might be questioned. furry hater guy said what does their race have to do with this and i dont remember what i said after it but he sent a horse emoji which is a reference to the meme of a horse standing at the sea with the caption "MAN" and i felt it inappropriate so i muted him for 10 minutes.
so the time my friend told someone to kill themselves? he had almost gotten hit by a car, and said "kill yourself for real" about the driver. furry hater guy got mad at this and said no suicide jokes. i misinterpreted it as another baseless criticism and told him to shut up. i was wrong for this and apologized, and later decided to just leave the server because i wasnt having fun in it anyway.
idk where to place these things in this giant block of text so theyre going at the end my friend and i used the dining room table to do crafts which is why azzyisjazzy bike locked the chairs. okay...ill just get my own i guess? he has threatened to put cameras up in the house which i am fairly certain is illegal because i do not consent and it would violate a reasonable expectation of privacy in the state of Missouri. also azzyisjazzy and i both agreed that nudity is not an issue, and when i am alone in the house sometimes i dont have a shirt on. i am a trans man, i have tits. that's inappropriate and once again im fairly certain that is illegal. missouri is a one party consent state so the only circumstance where recording me would be okay is if one of whoever is in the video or audio consents, such as if azzyisjazzy and i had a conversation. he could be the one to consent. but he doesn't say use his big boy words at me anymore so that wont happen. weve said a total of maybe 5 words to each other in the last month. i text him sometimes and he pretends not to see it but i know he does because he thinks me telling him his post got removed was bragging that i reported it. maybe my friends did? i dont control them. lmao.
hes also told my friends that me simply living here is an "escalation" and that if i continue to live here "things will get worse for me" those are threats. genuinely convinced that he knows a lot of what he is saying is made the fuck up or stretched truths just so "things will get worse"
btw, im not the one abusing the dog. she gets one walk a day and is barely played with because of how much azzyisjazzy works. all she does is sleep all day and bark out the window and piss on the couch and the floor and chew up shit azzyisjazzy leaves around the house, like a plastic tape dispenser. those plastic shards might be inside her stomach, by the way. that can and has killed dogs. many times.
i dont know what else to say. this is getting way too long. i certainly feel better after writing it though.
i may or may not respond to comments. i dont really feel like proving myself to a bunch of redditors, but considering these lies might follow me around for a while especially because finchsexroomate posted my FACE????? glad i look extremely different now (thanks hrt) and was wearing a mask lol. what sort of fucking insane behavior. i kind of wanted to post webcomics online, so i felt it necessary to do a bit of damage control. of course, all sides to this is mostly he said she said, so this only helps so much. but i said my truth, and ill stand by it. omission of details is because i forgot. this has been all over the last two years. my memory is shot because i got covid the first time i was in the motel and the repeated trauma hasnt helped. if someone brings up a good point i will respond to it.
anyway. ill move out when im able to. get the fuck over it.
good fucking lord.
im going to go do literally anything else more productive than this. get a new hobby. make a fursona and maybe youll feel better. fucking weirdos
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wtfuglydemon · 3 months
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As the year ends i keep thinking how this year was.... something. I feel like life gave me a soft reset and i dont know what to do with it, it's not as much as i was given a second chance on things but as if everything ive built suddenly crumbled down with no warning and im now forced to work around this, for better or worse.
This year already started horribly, after all i just left from a year where i was being humiliated, shamed and scolded for not being sad about my uncle's death, a man they all know tried to kill me multiple times before, i dont know if i am fully over that still.
At the beginning of the year i am suddenly invited to live with someone i honestly didnt even know and since i was so eager to leave home i accepted but didnt realize how much pressure that would place on my back, as suddenly i was responsible by so many things and specially the person. A horrible gamble that only made my situation at home worse because i left after a fight, never contracted anyone and suddenly i had to come back and pretend nothing happened, worsening my relationship with everyone now that they know i hate them.
I actually dont even remember what happened in April anymore besides the fact i tried to kill myself, i only know this because i told some people but my memory of it is completely gone however it is relevant as it is now May and im a very depressive episode the whole month due to my current treatment and i then suddenly forget my mother's birthday at the end of it, im at my worst day and im being guilted and dragged into a birthday party that i do not have since im 10, without a shower, without time to comb my hair, looking my worst in a place full of people who actively hate me, who told they hate me many times, i felt vulnerable and violated, i had to leave early and had a panic attack which led me to go back into self harming, something I hadn't done for years but this is what brought it back and now i was in a very bad mood and locked at my room
Then immediately after, the person i lived with for what was nice for a month or two, she made me start my hrt and gather my documents to change gender and name officially, and gave me many other things but now there was a problem, she was so... obsessive and possessive over me and i never had shown any interest in her and this became weird fast, everything she did felt like she was trying to win me over, all the gifts all the help, it felt like she saw my state and thought i was mentally vulnerable enough, that she could "save" me which eventually led me to be highly uncomfortable and start distancing myself. She got mad at me, started telling me i should go to therapy despite the fact im open to the fact im not returning to one, there was a random threat of sending me to a psych ward, she questioned my relationships and said they were all bad for me despite barely knowing the people i involved myself with AND me, and as i exploded due to my already bad mood and my frustrations about how she was invading my personal space and thinking she is important to me, that only certain people could, she used my words to spread it to all my old group of friends in a way that made it seen like i hated them.
I was immediately abandoned by everyone i knew since 2015 or even early, the only stable relationships i had my whole life, i was called many names, thrown away without a second thought and only for me to find out this was already coming, that they already had a secret chat to talk bad about me without me knowing way before all this, so all this did was give them an excuse. Of course i also no income and now with her doing this, i have to sustain myself with my hrt meds, something around $40(BRL120) per month and $80(BRL240) every four months, my family already hates me and now i need them to buy these, further decreasing even the food i receive and now i can not ask for anything, not only that but i am now being forced into a job i can not have, causing me to once again cut.
It's been like that for two more months, i only gathered enough courage to leave the house once in July to pick up my new altered documents and once my birthday came in September, almost no one remembered, two people did but not even my partner at the time did — all while i watched so many people with September birthdays, even the same day as mine get everything, birthday wishes, gifts, a party. I have a horrible relationship with birthdays, i never had birthdays past 10yo, all i get since then is a cheap chocolate box and a rush to find a job and leave the house and this year was no different but with the added flavor or being blamed for the lack of money due to my meds. To me, birthdays represent the day i start existing and if no one says anything about it, it tells me I shouldn't exist, which is what i thought that day, I was forgotten by everyone again, i ended everything, even with my old partner, that was the third cutting in less than 5 months.
I truly was at my lowest by the end of September and only by October i would have better news, it was when i got much closer to p-chan, my current gf, when we started dating... he cares so much for me, helps me at my lowest moments and makes me feel secure, i now have new people around me that i talk more often with and even if things at home have not changed, they are a lot more manageable when i have someone that understands my mind and is able to help me stay mentally stable after everything i went through this year, i really have no words on how grateful i am to her, she has been my light this whole end of the year, i am going to next year a little more hopeful for the better which is more than i can say going to this year. Ive been beaten down this year over and over and over, with barely any time to breathe, i dont think i am over anything in it yet and im back into my self harming behavior, with cuts as new as two weeks ago but i am better than i was at the beginning of the year and that makes me know that i can start over next year, with better people at my side.
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tadpolesonalgae · 5 months
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this chapter was so good! i feel like we got to see a little of everyone's thoughts here which im glad because her view of everything really is so limited. there's so much to say omg i hope i don't rant for too long
first the azriel pov was good to see how things are going from his side but it does kinda suck that he still mostly cares just because of his job. i hope we actually get some feelings from him soon, even if platonic because things aren't looking good for reader
maybe i've been too hard on the ic lol but i stand by that they should try harder. i get elain telling nesta she needs time but this has been going on for years and no matter how much reader likes reading and staying up in her room it's not healthy. i get it worked for elain but it's clearly getting worse for reader so i hope after this shopping trip they start pulling her out of her comfort zone more and more, like it doesn't have to be dinners with everyone but at least once or twice a week making sure someone takes her out of the house even to like a bakery or something for at least an hour isn't that hard to do and it helps a lot. i know i get stuck on this issue a lot but i think ive said before that im kind of similar to reader in a way, ive always had a tendency to isolate myself and i cant really do large groups of people but my family has always pulled me out of it and dragged me to do something and i was usually mad the entire time and sometimes half in a panic but it works. giving her time and space is good but after months and especially years that space is just making her more and more isolated and makes it harder to help. and i think the biggest thing is that its been years since she's been fae but it makes sense that they had their hands full with the war and then nesta was on a way more self destructive path and then nyx so i get it but i wish they helped more. and i get elain not wanting to make her more uncomfortable but she's not really helping to be honest, just because she likes being in her room it doesn't make it good at all and nesta is right. it's been too long for them to still be letting her hide from everything, it's clear she isn't okay.
as much as i loved the chapter it was so frustrating to read. reader really doesn't think she deserves anything good and it sucks. like not even clothes? i know mor saw how bad it was so i hope this makes the ic move more because this isn't a good way to live at all and there are so many red flags with reader at this point. she clearly isolates herself, she thinks she doesn't deserve anything good, she keeps comparing herself to everyone physically, she has no self esteem at all. the moments where she was examining the dress she liked and from the description it was a wool full length dress and she still found a way to think it was revealing? i never had much hope for her style but she really dresses like a nun and it also shows that she isn't comfortable with herself at all. also when she thought she was being selfish for buying clothes? im sorry to elain but reader doesn't need more space, she needs everyone to have a really serious conversation with her and tell her that she doesn't need to do anything to deserve a normal life and normal things, honestly i think it should be nesta or all the sisters because this is has bad as nesta was before acosf, she just hides instead of lashing out. and then she needs someone to start pushing her a bit, she'll have to be uncomfortable before she gets better but she can't keep going like this, she's basically punishing herself for breathing. eris would be good for the pushing her a bit part but i hope someone actually talks to her first.
the part when the ic finds out either about her powers or eris is going to be really messy but i hope it comes soon and honestly i kinda hope she says some of what she's feeling, even if it's in the middle of a breakdown because something needs to happen and she's not going to be able to do it without everyone's help. she has such a long way to go and she only seems like she's getting worse so i hope we get to see her starting to heal soon - 🧶
‘there's so much to say omg i hope i don't rant for too long’
I love whenever you send these in! It’s so fun to see you dissect the chapter and so heartwarming too 🥹🫂🫂
‘even if platonic because things aren't looking good for reader’
I hate to say it, but things are probably going to get worse before they get better 🫣 (maybe 👀)
I will admit, it would be nice to write them having a normal exchange for once? Maybe when reader’s come back from an outing and she’s too frazzled from so much interaction for her nerves to set in ���
‘ i get it worked for elain but it's clearly getting worse for reader’
I mean I suppose from their perspective reader and Elain are kind of similar in that they’re both pretty quiet and reserved so it would make sense that perhaps reader would have the same coping mechanisms as her? But yeah, now that it’s been two years and there’d kind of time to relax (👀) and things haven’t changed, Nesta at least is beginning to notice some stuff :/
‘but at least once or twice a week making sure someone takes her out of the house’
Also she does go out with Bas every now and then so they would have taken that into consideration, but at the same time I’ve head-cannoned it that they don’t know the nature of her and Bas’ relationship? Az at least thinks it’s still purely platonic (on reader’s side) so that might be fun for when the penny finally drops 🫣🤭
‘ and i was usually mad the entire time and sometimes half in a panic but it works.’
Gosh I know what you mean 🫠
In the moment it’s stressful and you don’t want to be there, but years later the memories are actually kind of fondly viewed? I think that will probably be the case with reader once she begins to get used to the company?
‘from the description it was a wool full length dress and she still found a way to think it was revealing?’
Yup! (Can you imagine how comfy that would be? 🫠) She certainly has some problems with seeing how she looks, and I like to think a lot of that comes from spending so long being forced to let go of her beauty when she was younger? Like she remembers how wonderful and full of colour her childhood was and has kind of glorified and exaggerated that in her mind? Memory has shifted it to be much more rich and beautiful than it probably was, so in the back of her mind she’s comparing how things used to be with her years in poverty, and stuck thinking instead of how lucky things have turned out and accepting them, thinking how she just doesn’t deserve them anymore :/
‘she needs everyone to have a really serious conversation with her’
There certainly will be a serious conversation at some point 👀🤭
‘eris would be good for the pushing her a bit part but i hope someone actually talks to her first.’
So this part I’m a little scared to write because once it’s out then everything else will have to happen 😭
The moment Elain talks with her and Eris starts to help (in his own skewered way, of course) then the story is going to have to move forward and I’m genuinely so scared to mess it up
‘the part when the ic finds out either about her powers or eris is going to be really messy’
Yeah… 😬😬😬
‘and honestly i kinda hope she says some of what she's feeling,’
It’s definitely going to be cathartic when she manages to do something for herself, let’s just hope the ic will be able to prioritise that over the mess with Eris 👀
Thank you so much for sending this in!! It’s always so wonderful to read through your thoughts and reply to them—it honestly makes me smile so wide to see these whenever you send them in 🧡💛🫂
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mikasa-imadebiscults · 5 months
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i accidentally submitted the first one in the middle of writing it😟😟but can i please get a jjk and demon slayer matchup if thats too much just jjk, btw i go by she/her<333333
I have reddish brown wavy thick hair and brown eyes i usually leave my hair down but i sometimes put it in braids or pigtails , im 5'1, and have a pear body type im a female and bisexual (male preference)
My hobbies are likeee, working out, playing electric guitar, kickboxing, buying dumb shit that i dont need, baking(especially for loved ones)and i have a few other hobbies
For my personality im an istp and an aquarius if those count for anything, its hard for me to describe my own personality but some people dont get my sense of humor often and i come off as mean. Another thing that makes me come off as rude or mean is my social anxiety in public so i dont say much and i have a resting bitch face not even on purpose. I dont consider myself mean, like i genuinely love making people happy and helping them with things but my social anxiety holds me back on trying to help people and complimenting them .I only have a small group of friends that i talk to but i love them so much. I can be antisocial sometimes because being social all the time drains me, . Though when im with my friends and im really energetic, impulsive, dramatic, opinionated, sarcastic and a little annoying and talk a lot n i always wanna do things+a risk taker i get myself in trouble a lot. I hate it when i go over to peoples houses and they js sit on their phone like wtf did i even come here for ??
Some things i love are animals,doing new things, flowers, nature, horror, the color pink, anything pretty really, motorcycles, pinterest, music(especially metal or rock), incense, smoothie bowls, my friends, plushies, dressing up, halloween,long walks and a lot of other thingsssssss
Some stuff i hate are cheaters, home wreckers, talking to new people, feeling nauseous from panic attacks, fatigue, and wasps.
People tend to see me as less emotional which is true sometimes but when i love i really love hard and i dont get with just anyone and it takes me a while to fall for someone and people don't expect it from me, im so different and emotional when i love somebody and i usually just end up being manipulated, and i dont give up on people easily i try my hardest to empathize with them and work it out.
Another toxic thing is i can be overprotective and possessive in relationships a bit😭
i love love gift giving and physical touch both giving and receiving and i like making my partner handmade gifts that take a lot of effort to show i care though i also like spending money on them
I find it cute when the person im with gets overly jealous but i would never purposely wanna make them feel that way, i know how it feels and they don't deserve that. I hate it when people make me jealous on purpose because they "like it". i love being pampered but ill never ask for it
the littlest thing a person i love would do for me makes me so happyyyyyyyy
(im sorry how fucking long this is whenever i start typing things i cant stop)
(HELLO, I’M SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO COMPLETE. PROCRASTINATION WAS ON MY ASS!! I hope you enjoy this!)
I match you with..
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Gojo Satoru
- When he first meets you he’s the one that made the first move.
- Because Gojo is Gojo, he’ll tease you about your fear of wasps. You’ll be walking with him outside and he’ll suddenly be like “OH THERE’S A WASP-”
- He likes your homemade gifts and keeps every last one of them. He always has the biggest smile on his face whenever you give him anything.
- Speaking of gifts, he loves to gift you small things like flowers, your favorite snacks, etc.
- He pampered you before, but when he found out that you love being pampered he’ll spoil you more often.
- If you get sarcastic with him he’ll do the same, sticking his tongue out whenever you give him a jokingly mad glare.
- When he walks by you he likes to flick you on the forehead then smile at you.
- When the two of you are walking he almost always has an arm around you.
- On Halloween (or more like the month of October) he loves to try and scare you out of nowhere.
- He likes to listen to you play the instruments you love, always cheers you on.
- Believes that your protective side is adorable and will most definitely tease you.
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Kyojuro Rengoku
- When you’re first talking to him, he figures out quickly that you don’t really like talking to new people so he always makes sure you’re comfortable.
- He admires that you don’t give up on others easily and that you love to make others happy. He tries to help you with your social anxiety the best he can. If you’re feeling anxious he’ll grab your hand and will squeeze it firmly.
- Whenever you’re feeling nauseous from panic attacks he’ll be there to comfort you. He would get you a cold drink and do whatever you want him to do.
- He thinks that your sense of humor is unique and encourages you to continue making people laugh.
- He absolutely loves your homemade gifts, he thinks it’s very very thoughtful of you to take the time to make something handmade.
- Whenever you two are out in a restaurant he always pulls out your chair for you with a smile on his face.
- He helps you stay motivated to work out and gives you some tips to help some of the soreness.
- He loves to pull you into his chest while you’re cuddling with him.
- When it’s a day off for the both of you, you two will bake together. He always insists on helping you clean afterwards.
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thomas-j-nook · 1 year
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If i look double my size this winter its because i am wearing thermal top and thermal legging under my clothes. My clothes, a cardigan or sweater and my jacket all at once. I have never been this cold but i losy over 50% of my access body weight. You think all this loose skin would do something helpful to keep me arm but it only mocks me. But yes. It's gonna be a 5 layer winter for me. I have gloves to to sensory issues but not im like "give me all the hats and gloves"
I may try crocheting over the weekend. I bought a begginers kit from walmart last weekend and I've been buying yarn here and there since i became interested in it. We will see. I want to do it. I've wanted to do it for a while. The thing is i have a hard time with learning because if i struggle or mess up i quit. I have walked away from game night with pete friends because i could not comprehend the game. And i was getting mad. They kept having to explain it to me and u got mad at myself. I can be a perfectionism. Thats actually why i stopped drawing because id freak when i messed up multiple times and I'd end up spiraling. So I'm really dedicated to crochet and i need a hobby i can do individually.
Its my friday so ill stay up for a while watching tv and enjoying some alone time that i won't be quiet because the rabbit is crazy and super social. Thats another reason why he was moved to the livingroom he was waking me up at night. He just wants to play a lot. And i give him tons of toys and play time. I'm a very good pet owner. People are often impressed by my hermit crab set up. If you do research they need 6 inches of dirt to borow in they burry them selves and molt. Hermit crabs can live long lives. Most don't because people don't know the proper needs they have. I bought my rabbit a huge cage. I let him out to run and play. He socializes with the cats. I need him a very strick diet. No treats containing added sugar no nuts, no seeds. I actually make him his own dehydrated snacks. I give him hay. Rabbits are supose to eat 80% hay!!! And some fresh greens and pellets last. So he gets fresh salad for breakfast. I give him a handful of pellets that he does not eat. Lol. And he has two hay areas. One hay feeder and one is a hanging toy you put hay in. He does not like sticks. I spent a decent anout of money on apple wood that i threw away because he snubbed them. I spent an hour washing the sticks. And i had a panic attack because some customer at wallingfords said i stole then but i didn't i paid up front and they said go fill a bag iegit cried in the car because someone accused me of stealing. And pete was like you paid kasey. They know you paid they gave you a bag to fill and everything. It still bothers me a lot actually. I don't want anyone to think i steal. Thats why sometimes its hard for pete to help me because my brain is different due to autism and mental illness. So i can be really upset over something and it's a big deal for me. And he can't understand why I'm upset because to him its a speed bump to me its a full road washed out. I think its part autism and part of who i am. I don't have age appropriate reactions sometimes and I'm trying. Like today i made a plan to tell ginny why i was upset and ask her to help problem solve and it went to hell for me because i ended up reacting not how i planned. I think it has to do with me not learning or being able to express my emotions as a child due to how i was treated. But i also broke other toxic habbits from my childhood. Like i keep my apartment semi clean, i don't leave food to mold out. I take care of my aninals, i save money so i know i never have to worry about cmp getting shut off. I mean if i did change all those so i probably can change my reactions and how i express myself. It's hard because i got a lot going on with my brain. I have autism, i have mental illness, anxiety, i have a cheri malformation. I had surgury to lessen the symptoms that because it went i treated for long i have some damage. I'll be honest. I can't think as fast. I know i have trouble with balence and walking straight. My brain is not the same as it was before that. A chari in the brain has long term effects. I will amways have it. The surgu did not cure me. I still have a hole in my skull. I have have a peice of mesh on the inside of the skull to keep my brain where it belongs and to ensure flow of fluids. What happened was my brain fluid was not circulating right. So I'd pass out. And be in critical pain. I'd cry when i had those episodes because i was very scared. Thats one of the resons my brother lived with us. He coukd help walk me to bed and he could hear if i fell and aid assistance. I will say recovering with support was helpful. I didn't remember anything. I'd just wake up on the floor. And i was more calm when pete was there or my brother. They also checked my head because i hit it going down multiple times. So they checked for cuts or bruises. The damage is minimal compaired to what it coukd be but it's there.
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seira-lou · 2 years
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Hi, i am Seira Lou Ramirez Delas Alas and i am the oldest daughter of Mr and Mrs. Perfecto R. Delas Alas And Marilou R. Delas Alas.  I was raised and born in batangas i was born in Nasugbu Batangas . right now im lived in Brgy 5 lian batangas . I am 18 years old and currently studying at lian institute.
Memoir
Past I can say is that  a big impact on what and who I am now as a student.Come and find out what is my story that I have in my past
I am a simple and fun kid who dreams of being a doctor but I thought as long as you dream it's easy for you to get as long as you persevere
 in what you want but I made a mistake for me. my past life has helped me to improve more on the things I,want and I want to learn more 
I thought what god gave me talent is that but he still has things he wants for me to learn and I will work even harder .To do this thing and 
Do you know the best experience ? that I have to learn to make without the help of others? The type that makes your own effort in everything you want to do in life and  when I was a child my only dream was to cook. cooked but now I can bake,delicious breads on purpose It's true the saying that if you want  here is a way if you don't want there is a reason and that is the best memory I will cherish until I grow old.but you know there are things we really can't do like we did before because.if you want to play you can play as long as you want but now there is a limit and most children now prioritize playing online games.
  more than playing children's games like patintero and luksong tinik.now children are more on social media and they have never experienced how to enjoy the life of being a child so I am thankful because at least once in my life I have experienced enjoying my childhood in the past life.
Covid for me the word i will never forget because it contains many stories of every person affected by it especially now that many have taken life from this disease and complained of losing their jobs due to this pandemic and losing loved ones as well so as a person and student who has also been affected by this pandemic I can say this is one of the reasons why we students have lost the opportunity to live normally and be happy because of this pandemic there are so many rules that we have to follow because for it's for everyone's safety and because of this pandemic our students' study has become an online transaction where we can see each other through google meet, video call and much more everything you do now pandemic needs to have a limit especially at family gatherings you can't just let anyone in because maybe one of them will be able to virus infection that spread in our country and many destroyed during the pandemic because not everything you want to do as before you can do you can not do it if you do not say goodbye and you do not have notice from the health care facilities in your village and you can't go to malls out of town without a swab test called you have to swab more if you want to travel somewhere else.and another of the effects of this pandemic is the loss of business industries that are said to be the source of livelihood and sustenance for every family. in the offices so the others who chose to work from home found out that their health would be in jeopardy due to the spread of the virus and another effect of this pandemic on our people is the shortage of medicines in pharmacies that previously were not we are experiencing but now there is a pandemic all drugs are important because it is running out in all drugstores and one of the problems we must solve is the panic buying of people because they are afraid of running out of food they are panicking buying which should not be they do it because we have a lot of food supply in supermarkets so it's a pity that others don't have mad atnan anymore buy in supermarkets because of the defeat of panic buying which should have become practical for them not to just run out of the contents of a grocery store so it is also pitiful for others who have no money to buy food and stock in their respective homes.this pandemic has also taught every person that we can learn to be independent because we are not always with our parents and family at all times and we also need to be practical in spending money because the money we spend during the pandemic is too hard. that we are facing today because as one of those who will be affected by this pandemic, we students have put aside our aspirations to climb and reach the stage of success that we have worked so hard for over the years of hard work and perseverance that we have done because In this pandemic, we will not be able to enjoy our successes at our graduation because of the limited number of people who can go to school, so everything we do in our education and even when we graduate is still virtual because to the restrictions implemented by our government to combat the virus that is spreading and gradually i took people's lives.
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agentgumsh0e · 2 years
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Hiya, is it okay if I ask for cypher, sova, kay/o and yoru taking care of a female reader with her period? Mine came and im absolutely dying/hj.
Feel free to ignore it tho, cause I know it sounds a little request-y and your requests are closed./gen
Have a nice day!
taking care of you on your period (cypher, sova, kay/o, yoru)
word count: 750+
warnings: slight mention of blood, nothing's graphic
cypher
he's had a wife and/or family before, so he knows what he's doing. if your cramps are really bad and he's too busy to be by your side 24/7, he'll make you a gadget specifically to massage or warm an area. he buys all the tampons, pads, etc. you might need, plus your favorite foods and drinks. however, if they're all unhealthy, he might substitute some of them. he understands the mood swings, and he's great with listening and calming you down. he makes sure you're well-rested and healthy for the most part. he puts the gadget on your head for the headaches, and he likes to hum while cuddling you since it helps you fall asleep. but if you still can’t drift off, you won’t be alone since he has a bad sleep schedule. you can both stay up, talking about whatever comes to mind in his workshop while he makes his gadgets until you fall asleep in his lap.
sova
he probably has some experience, but to be honest, he might ask sage for some help with medication for your symptoms. he soothes your cramps by running you a warm bath or placing a heating pad on you. like cypher, he's bought all the supplies but will most likely substitute the junk food you might be craving with healthy homemade food, mostly stuff he picked up from his russian family. he holds you close during the depressive mood swings and offers comforting words. he doesn't mind if you lash out at him and will give you space for you to cool off. for headaches, he'll probably give you some meds and kiss your head to “ensure” that it works (though you both know that's not the real reason why he does it). if you can’t sleep, he loves to cuddle with you underneath a big warm blanket as he rubs circles into your back.
kay/o
panic. big panic. he didn't even know that people can get periods. he's searching his databases for an answer, but when they come up empty (because who would program him to deal with this sort of thing), he goes to sage, who's a radiant, and asks for help. “they're...bleeding!” sage gets deeply concerned at first before he promptly follows it up with, “from their privates!” she laughs, which didn’t help kay/o’s worries in the slightest. he comes back with a lot of meds, heating stuff, etc, but he has no idea where to start until you guide him. if you ask him to massage you somewhere, he gets very flustered but tries his best anyways. he's honestly really distressed as to why blood is coming from there, but no one's really told him why yet, so he just gives you the supplies and hopes for the best. he’s definitely making sure you're eating and resting well because that's one thing he knows for sure helps with human problems like headaches. “this headache is gonna kill me.” “I WILL KILL IT FOR YOU.” he doesn't really understand mood swings but will still lend an ear if you need it. though, he still wonders what he might've done wrong if you get mad at him. if you can't sleep and need him for support, he’ll awkwardly try to cuddle with you and provide warmth (the same goes with cramps).
yoru
panicking on the inside, calm and collected on the outside. he doesn't really know what's going on, so he consults the internet. he's too proud to ask anyone because he thinks that'll make him look inexperienced and stupid. he's kind of awkward, even when he's trying to help. “oh, you want a pad? what flavor?” he’s always wondering how hot is too hot when it comes to cramps. and when he's out shopping, he's the “what size pu$$y you wear” meme. he definitely understands the craving for junk food and will indulge you in it. he doesn't know how to handle mood swings because there can only be one person in this relationship who can be irritable at a time and that's him, but he still tries his best to understand your emotions and is a (un)surprisingly good listener. headaches? you're both taking meds for it because his mind is going crazy trying to help. if you want to cuddle at any point, he'll be like “ew. but ok.” no worries if you can’t fall asleep, since he's an insomniac himself, you both can just stay up all night playing video games and sleep until noon.
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angstyx · 3 years
Text
First Date HCs
Includes: Dream, George, Sapnap, Wilbur Soot, Fundy, Karl Jacobs
TW: cursing
Requested?: [Yes] [No]
Note: some people might be ooc and this isn't proofread 😃 sorry
Masterlist // Rules for Requesting
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Dream
this man would be pretty confident
like he'll compliment you and tell you how nice you look at the beginning of the date
he'll know the ways to impress and charm you and he'll even take you to a fancy restaurant and buy you flowers
but a tiny part of him would also be nervous
and at the end of the date when you tell him that you enjoyed it, his heart can't help but skip a beat
"I enjoyed the date as well and um, would you maybe- and it's okay if you don't want to but w-would you like to go on another date with me?"
and when you agree, a smile would stay on dreams face for the rest of the day
George
poor George :(
he'll be so nervous and he'll stress too much about ruining the date
he'll be stuttering when he talks to you and his face would be flushed
"oh uh h-have I told you um how n-nice you look?"
he'll probably also knock over something by accident but you'll just tell him it's okay
he'll be scared that the date was going to go wrong but when you noticed how nervous he was and reassured him, he began to feel a little less nervous
Sapnap
would act confident but inside his head would be full on panic mode
he'll suddenly forget basic things because he just wants to impress you so badly
like he almost forgot how to talk-
but thankfully you lead the conversation and everything went smoothly
and he'll even have some pickup lines up his sleeve which may or may not be bad, you can decide
his pickup lines would definitely be cheesy yet sweet at the same time and you can't help but laugh (affectionately) a little when he says them
"if I uh could rearrange the alphabet, I'll put um U and I t-together"
like I said: cheesy, yet sweet
Wilbur Soot
Will literally tweet on Twitter that's he's going on a date ._.
"About to go on a date, everyone better wish me luck or I'm fucking deleting my channel"
probably will call phil to help him out beforehand cause the man doesn't know what to do
"Phil?"
"Yeah? What do you want?"
"Uh you got any tips for dates? You know, since you have a wi-"
"oh fuck you"
"PHIL HELP ME OUT IM FUCKING CONFUSED"
that didn't help
Tommy got mad cause Wilbur was going on a date and he wasn't"
the date went fairly well and when Wilbur got asked what he does for a living, he panicked
But like I said, overall the date went fairly well
Except for the part when Tommy called Wilbur in the middle of the date just to say hi to you
"HI WOMAN HOW ARE YOU"
"uh hi?"
"Tommy please stop you're embarrassing me Infront of my date"
"WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE DATE SO FAR WOMAN? WILBUR CAN BE A REAL DICKHEAD SOMETIMES"
"oh my god Tommy..."
Fundy
he'll probably talk about his cat, boots, a lot and show you a bunch of photos of her which you can't help but think is cute
and when he realizes that he's been rambling about his cat the entire time, his face would immediately turn red and you just giggle as he tries to apologize but you assure him that you didn't mind
"oh uh s-sorry about that.."
"it's fine! Besides, your cat looks really cute. I would love to meet her someday."
and all Fundy could think of was what you said cause what meant that the date wasn't entirely ruined by his rambling
let's just say that you definitely got a chance to meet his cat :)
Karl Jacobs
he'll be giggling the entire date honestly
but under the table he'll be playing with his fingers cause he's so nervous
his stomach is filled with butterflies and it's clear that he's blushing
and he'll accidentally cut you off just to compliment you
"and so I went to-"
"you look really n-nice today, y/n"
I swear he doesn't do it on purpose
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Taglist: @thenotsohottopic @0-0littlem0-0 @bi-narystars @707xn @sakurapartridge @ryxjxnnx @boiciph3r @maxiewritesfanfic @nightwalkercrescent @missusstark @multifandomgirl-us @sophia902103 @sunnyxlove @marrymetheonott @voidgonemissing @alec-lost-bee @ttakinou @izuru666 @chaoticotaku @joyfullymulti @oh-mcyt @sxltedcxramel @dawnfallx @blushingduckling @lacunaanonymoused @blueberrystigma
Send me an ask or dm to be added to my taglist! :)
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lovelybkg · 3 years
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protective | t.s.
pairing : todoroki shoto x gn!reader
request by @pocky-writes​ : how about a soft yandere todoroki who likes to spoil his sweetheart, and at first they don't like it until he scolds them and tells them that if they don't accept the spoils, he won't give them anything else. smuggle in some praise from him at the end too?? <33
note : wanted to write protective shoto, and i thought the request kinda fit so i decided to add it ! sorry if it isn’t the main story D:
warnings : very protective behavior, reader is kinda childish and sensitive, slight manipulation
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you woke up to an empty bed, devoid of the usual gucci and other designer brands packages shoto left for you. you let out a sigh of relief, thinking he finally listened to you and stopped sending you so much expensive stuff. surely, you didn’t need all those gowns and designer bags. hell, you don’t even go out! were you supposed to wear those fancy clothes in your small apartment? upon telling him about this, he offered to let you move in with him in his penthouse. as if. 
you love him, you really do. but he just has to listen to you sometimes! you don’t want him wasting so much money on you! he’s already paying for your college tuitions, that’s already too much. whenever you tried to tell him to stop, he just shuts you up with a chuckle and a kiss on your forehead, telling you not to worry about it. 
opening your phone, the 27 unread messages from him didn’t even phase you. he did have the tendency to send you a lot of text, most of them to check up on you. you knew how much it bothered him not being able to meet you often because of hero work, that’s why you were so understanding of his protectiveness and clinginess. he’s just worried, after all. you sent him a good morning text, proceeding to answer all of his questions as to avoid making him worry. he does get fussy when you don’t reply to his texts quickly. 
then you remember the plan you made with your friends to go out later that afternoon. you knew there was no way shoto would let you go, he doesn’t really allow you to go out much anymore. you understand though, he just wants to keep you safe! but maybe he’ll let you this time? before you can carefully plan how you’ll ask for permission, your phone flashes with an incoming phone call from him.
his deep voice greets you as soon as you answer the call, “good morning, my love”
“good morning, sho! are you at the agency?” he couldn’t help but smile at the enthusiastic way you greeted him. you were just so cute! he feels all his stress melting away by just hearing your voice.
the conversation went on for about an hour. he tells you about how stressful his morning was, with the new interns messing up during patrol and how dynamight couldn’t control his temper in front of the media again, which ended with him having to take care of everything with the agency’s pr department. you wanted to know more about his day, but he quickly changed the subject, instead asking you about how your sleep was. were the new pillows he bought you comfortable? how about the cotton silk pajamas? did you wear them? upon answering yes, he asked you for a picture. you quickly sent him one, fixing your hair before doing so.
“you look adorable, baby. do you like them? i’ll buy you more once i have the time” before you could protest, he changed the subject again as if he knew you were going to refuse. 
“what are your plans for today? i don’t think i can visit you today, it’s quite busy here at the agency. maybe you could read the new books i bought you, or just rest and take naps for the whole day. also, don’t forget to take care of yourself. i left my credit card there so you can order food, okay?” suddenly being reminded of your plans by his question, you braced yourself for what you were going to say next. 
softly calling out his name, he hums as if asking you to go on. what were you so nervous about? he knows you get quiet when you want to ask him for something, he just wishes you would stop being so shy. after all, he would give you anything your little heart desired. 
“can i go out with my friends tonight? please? i promise i’ll be home by ten!” you practically squeaked out with how nervous you were. it’s as if you could hear your heart beating out of your chest with the silence that followed your question. why isn’t he talking? is he upset at you?
“no” his voice was cold now, quickly replacing the doting tone he was speaking to you in earlier.
“w- why? it’s safe! there’ll be six of us so there’s no way i’ll get hurt! please, sho, just this once? i haven’t seen my friends in so long” your voice started to crack, a sign you were close to crying. 
“i said no, baby. so stop arguing, alright?” you started crying now, all he could hear from the phone was your soft sniffles before you hang up on him. 
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
you woke up with a headache and a strong arm wrapped around your waist. as you begin to panic, you realize it’s just shoto next to you due to the scent of mint and expensive cologne that practically engulfed your room. 
remembering what happened a few hours ago, you felt tears well up in your eyes again. you didn’t even notice you fell asleep. you hugged him tightly and buried your face in his chest, startling him. 
“im sorry sho!” you blurted out. you snuggled further into his chest, refusing to look at him. you didn’t wanna see his face! he’s so scary when he’s angry!
quickly recovering from his shock, he started rubbing your back softly as he reassured you that he wasn’t upset at all. he readjusted your position, forcing you to look up “im not mad at you baby, but i am glad you know what you did was wrong. i just want to protect you, you understand right?”
you nodded your head yes as you tell him you love him too. of course you did, shoto took good care of you. he does everything for you, the least you could do is listen to what he says! after all, he knows what’s best for you.
he gives you a kiss on your forehead before smiling softly at you, “you were crying, weren’t you? i’m sorry baby, but i’ll make it up to you. we’ll go shopping later, alright? i’ll buy you whatever you want”
you whined out a no, puffing out your cheeks like a child. he seriously needs to stop spending money on you, you didn’t deserve it! 
as if reading your thoughts, he rushed to reassure you “why not? baby, let me spoil you. you deserve it,” you know you don’t deserve it. you’re already so lucky, being able to date him, knowing millions of other people wish they were in your place. what can you even give him in return?
“shouuuu” you whined, “you already give me so much! and i can’t even give you anything in return. i dont deserve you” you pouted, showing your clear displeasure of his insistence on spoiling you.
he let out a light chuckle, face laced with amusement from what you said. his naive baby, why can’t you understand that he wants to do this? he loves you, you’re his sweetheart, and he’s going to take care of you. he’ll give you the entire world if he could, it’s what you deserve.
“i don’t expect anything in return, my love. and i’m the one who doesn’t deserve you. you’re the sweetest baby anyone could ask for, i’m very lucky to be able to call you mine”
the writing is kinda choppy, especially the conversations dhshs im sorry! D:
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justalads · 3 years
Text
c!niki and c!wilbur enjoyers. pspspspspspsps
alright guys so last night i rewatched pretty much all of the pogtopia arc. and this isn’t meant to be a big, important analysis post (it’s kind of incomprehensible), because my brain is fried from, you know. rewatching pretty much all of pogtopia. but i do have some stuff i’d like to say.
(this also just became a niki meta sorry i love her. i really just got emo about her during the second half of this and it got long. i have a lot of feelings about her and wilbur’s friendship.)
it’s a pretty general conclusion that wilbur’s real “downfall” began on october 8th, during the stream “who are you go away”. of course, his spiral and the process of him losing faith had begun much earlier, more around the end of the first war or during the election. but the big switch, so to say, was definitely here, when as wilbur walks back from schlatt’s announcement, he asks tommy if they’re the bad guys.
this entire scene was so interesting to me. wilbur here is a man who has lost hope, someone who is backed into a corner morally and has nothing left. he points out that they can never really reclaim l’manburg without forever tainting it, and that schlatt knows this. the entire half an hour or so before, schlatt has been taunting wilbur about losing that power. the emphasis of the festival on “democracy” is so clearly a barb thrown at wilbur, and it works.
wilbur’s “nothing left to lose” in this vod is a mirror to niki’s “you know what they say about a woman who has nothing left to lose”. this will not be the first time they mirror each other.
basically, wilbur’s angry. when schlatt announced the festival, wilbur realized that maybe it wasn’t a terrible thing. so once he worked around into the mindset of “we’re the bad guys”, he was able to justify saying he was going to blow up the nation with no remorse. he wants chaos! he wants no survivors!
does he do it? god no.
during the streams leading up to november 16th, wilbur is consistently scared. he goes back and forth on it, and makes multiple “conditions” that determine whether he’s going to do it or not, almost begging someone to stop him. he whispers to himself that he’s scared, that his hands are shaking, that he’s not sure if it’s the right thing to do. because despite what he says about “not caring about any of them”, the instant niki is threatened after tubbo’s death, wilbur walks up to schlatt and tells him that if he’s going to kill anyone it should be him. later, when quackity and tommy talk him down from pressing the button, he can’t press it because they’re there and he can’t bring himself to kill them as well.
but he has no problems with putting his own life at risk. he refuses to wear armor half the time, and actively places himself in harm’s way to save others. he still cares about everyone else, as much as he says he doesn’t. even when he does cause harm to others, during november 16th, he immediately begs phil to kill him. “look, they all want you to.” he can’t live with what he’s done, and how he’s hurt people, but he couldn’t allow manburg to continue.
the man is terrified and angry and he can’t win. and even as he tries to stuff himself into the mind of someone who doesn’t care, he cannot. when he finally does, he cannot live with being that person.
but the reason i rewatched this arc was to see niki’s point of view, especially after her statements during her last stream. i genuinely think that wilbur’s only betrayal of her was pressing the button, because he betrayed everyone. they might have known he was going to do it, but they had faith he wouldn’t.
wilbur cared a lot about niki. her life under schlatt was awful, wilbur hated that she was suffering, and the scene where wilbur plants himself directly in the center of the festival and tells schlatt to kill him instead hits pretty hard. he has the argument with schlatt, and then turns to niki and tells her to run. he then hits people and sprints away, trying to give her time to escape.
this is also when he asks her to join pogtopia, because now that schlatt has said he’d kill her, it’s a safer place for her.
so the man did care about her. niki is angry at the memory of him that she has. it’s been twisted by time and her own grief and paranoia.
in rewatching pogtopia, i realized that a lot of people hate the memory of wilbur. not him, and what he did. they think he didn’t care. and to quote hamilton (apologies):
“history obliteratesit paints me in all my mistakes”
does niki have a right to be mad at him? absolutely. he caused direct harm to her by blowing up l’manburg, once it was reclaimed. but she’s wrong that he never cared.
(an interesting note: wilbur only blows it up after techno starts fighting people outside. he hears it, and says “look, they’re fighting”. he didn’t re-initiate the conflict of the country. the fact that even after peace was won people were fighting just gave evidence to his belief that the entire country was corrupted.)
niki has been hurt a lot, and wilbur has things to answer for. but we as the audience know that her statements are just her perception. she is a character who acts on perceptions. the entire stream was in black and white. during doomsday, upon seeing wilbur log on (as ghostbur), niki has a panic attack and destroys her bakery, trying to rid herself of the pain of the memories. her lines during this stream are chilling, whispered repetitions that are a mirror of wilbur’s end.
(paraphrased, it was long and confusing but there are a few bits and this was the essence of it)
“wilbur is gone. this isn’t happening. he is dead. l’manburg is gone.”“it is real, i am real, he is real and he is dead.”“l’manburg is gone, i am real, i am l’manburg”.
(god. dude i could spend Months analyzing this one stream alone. there’s so much here.)
doesn’t that sound a bit like “my unfinished symphony”? wilbur and niki both attach their own self to the nation they fought for, and can see it as an extension of themself. they both destroy parts of it in acts of fear, attempting to save everyone else from what they’ve made.
what i pulled away from niki’s stream is that she’s not healing. i remember the chamber she locks herself in at night. i remember her refusal to eat. i remember how she was so angry at tommy, and she later realized that anger was misguided. niki genuinely believes that wilbur did not care about her, and that’s not surprising: when he died, she denied the fact that he was gone. she represses the things that she can’t handle, same as lots of other people. it is easier for her to pin her hurt on wilbur, because she needs somewhere to pin it. people feel more in control if they’re angry, not sad.
the song cc!niki said was for her character really emphasizes this. it’s a coping mechanism.
but even condemning wilbur won’t help, because she will still never get closure. niki cares about what others think of her, and so she can’t move on from someone hurting her. she can’t move on because she thinks he hated her. she is angry that he is back, but it is an opportunity for her to heal. she couldn’t heal when he was gone. she’s not the only one with a negative perception of wilbur, after all. he has one too. the two of them really need to talk.
i want niki to be healthy and safe. i want to see her heal so badly, and i do think it will happen. after wilbur died, his betrayal of her stayed with her, and it eventually became her memory of the betrayal that she hated, not the thing itself. it’s been months since it happened. niki wants to find an outlet for her hurt, because she wants to feel better. there’s a pattern i noticed: she only gets mad at people once she hasn’t seen the person themself for a while. and once she sees them and talks to them, and realizes that they care about her and don’t want to hurt her, she stops blaming them for it. she only hates her perception of them. example one? tommy.
man was in exile for a long time, and when he came back he “brought” fighting. that’s how niki saw it. but the fact that after she spent time with tommy (trying to kill him but. details, details) she forgave him because she saw it wasn’t his fault is a really good sign.
i genuinely think that speaking to wilbur will help niki, and it will also help wilbur. after all, they both hate wilbur. the entire perception of wilbur as some heartless, crazy manipulator needs to be shattered for both of their sakes. they both buy into it.
i want niki to know that others care about her, and that she has places she can feel safe. she hates that wilbur is invading the syndicate, because she’s scared of his memory hurting her. i don’t think wilbur will hurt her on purpose, because even though he sees himself as awful, he doesn’t hate her. he never did. usually, with people who have hurt someone else, i want them as far away from the person they hurt as possible. if wilbur does hurt niki i’ll probably cry. but again, it’s not him that hated her, or really him that hurt her in the way she thinks he did. when wilbur was dead, niki didn’t get any better. her memory of him festered and made her feel worse. that’s also why niki killing wilbur or hurting him somehow wouldn’t help her heal. i want wilbur to explain that he didn’t hate her. is wilbur even close to self aware enough to help niki? nah. this is going to take a Long time, and it’s going to hurt.
last thing i swear lol
during niki’s stream, she says that wilbur manipulated her. again, i watched pogtopia last night, and i’ve watched the rest of season one recently as well. i genuinely don’t see it. but i do think i know why she said it.
during season one, wilbur doesn’t manipulate niki. he doesn’t have a chance to later, he’s dead. so then, what is she talking about? of course it’s a perception, same as a lot of her other claims. i think she’s talking about how she cared for l’manburg.
niki joined the server as wilbur’s friend, to join his nation. she grew to care for l’manburg. she devoted herself to it, same as he did. but doomsday showed us that she hates that. in niki’s eyes, l’manburg only brought pain for people, and because she ties herself to it, she hates that she ever cared about it. she can’t allow herself to care for it, because it was used to hurt. so how does she cope with knowing that she once did? she pretends she didn’t.
if she can convince herself that it was wilbur who convinced her to care about l’manburg, she can avoid blaming herself for her own pain. and yeah, she shouldn’t blame herself for it. it’s not her fault. the entire situation is tragic and a little hopeless and once again really makes me hope that she recovers. l’manburg was ruined for her by others. schlatt, techno, dream, wilbur. again another place where she and wilbur are similar: they convince themselves they never cared about l’manburg because of the hurt it caused.
to summarize: wilbur’s going to get a shock soon. don’t know when, but probably the prison visit. something is going to shake his perception, the story is hurtling towards that. once he is able to take responsibility for what he did, and feel safe (because a lot of what he does now is out of fear of being alone or useless), then he and niki need to talk. niki needs something to get her out of her own head. she’s spiraling too. they are essential to each other’s recovery because of how much they meant (and mean) to each other.
anyways i miss early season one niki i liked it when she was happy :(
~ Lad 2
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autisticandroids · 3 years
Note
Okay so this was a while back but im preety sure you had mentioned an au of yours where dean is a serial killer and cas successfully stalks him but i don't think you talked about it more than that and i just really want to hear a bit more bc that idea sounds so tastefully fucked up
okay so. weeks later i finally end up answering this ask. it inspired this post btw. anyway spn is a show that's like. all about justifications, as i said in the post inspired by this ask. it's about having no choice and doing what you have to do. and like there is the phantasy embedded in it, a phantasy that is both indulged and punished. but most importantly it's justified. the monsters are super strong to show how brave our heroes are for fighting them, the main characters let out great wails of grief every time their lady loves are violently ripped from them (even though now they are free to do whatever they want), the narrative twists to show our heroes as correct whatever they do. the fantasy (of being allowed to enact violence, of being free from feminine "control," of being right) comes first. the material construction of the universe of supernatural comes afterward. whatever the fantasy is, the universe of supernatural will provide material conditions to justify its acting-out.
and what this means is that our protagonists, dean in particular, are constantly doing just horrific things, which in any other circumstance would be unconscionable. but the universe of supernatural provides justification for these acts. the point of my serial killer au which i think about so so so much is to ask the question: what if these justifications melted out from under their feet? what if dean was left holding nothing but a lie and the weight of everything he's done?
therefore, the premise of my au is such (under the cut because this baby is long):
john and mary winchester, in the mid seventies, joined a doomsday cult known as the men of letters. the men of letters were rather unusual for a doomsday cult, in that they believed that the apocalypse could be prevented by human behavior. this started as correct living, correct worship, yadda yadda, the kind of behavior and thought control that cults are known for, but with the justification of: if you don't do this, the world will end. eventually, this escalated to human sacrifice. the men of letters managed to untraceably kill two homeless people in the late seventies. but they eventually fell apart. however, a month after john and mary left the men of letters (mostly john's choice, mary still believed), mary died in a house fire. john took it as a sign from god that actually, the men of letters were right, and the world would end unless john himself did something about it. so he took some of the (intensely numerological) theology of the men of letters. and he worked out his own formula. and he applied it to the yellow pages. and started ritualistically killed people to prevent the apocalypse, with his two sons in the back of the car.
now, obviously, this is some kind of grief induced temporary madness on john's part, shaped by the mental abuse he suffered in the men of letters. but the thing is, once you've killed a couple of people to prevent the apocalypse. well. there's this thing called the sunk costs fallacy. john wasn't gonna question his own beliefs after that.
and he raised his boys to believe it, too, or at least he raised dean to. they didn't tell sam what they did until he was twelve, and sam didn't buy it, tried to call the cops on them several times but in the end, they always prevented him. eventually sam ran off to stanford, where he now lives under a cloud of guilt that he's too loyal to his family to rat them out.
john died a few years back of a heart attack, but dean is convinced it's because he messed up a ritual two weeks before it happened, so it pushed him further into this belief system.
dean's killings (and john's before him) are ritualistic and distinctive, obviously the same killer each time. but they happen anywhere in the united states, seemingly at random, there are inconsistent amounts of time between each one (sometimes as short as days, sometimes as long as years), and there is no particular victim profile. obviously, since our killers are following an arcane mathematical formula to make their choices for them, but the police don't know that.
castiel novak is an unemployed shut-in with a small inheritance which he's living off of, a cryptography degree, and an obsession with all things morbid. he spends most of his time on the reddit true crime forums, playing amateur sleuth. by complete chance, he happens to recognize one of the symbols frequently used in corpse displays by the so-called sioux falls satanic slaughterer (so named because the first time three of his victims were in the same part of the country, it so happened that they were all in sioux falls, south dakota. this was in the late eighties.) as being mostly only used by a little known cult group called the men of letters, which dissolved in the mid eighties.
he only notices this because, as a teen, he had a special interest in cults and fringe religious groups. the men of letters weren't a particularly notable or well known phenomenon; they were small, and a lot like every other cult that formed during the seventies cult boom. (no outsider ever heard about the human sacrifice; there were rumors, of course, but they were garbled, sensationalized, and mixed up with satanic panic fodder.)
(the men of letters' two sacrifices were nothing particularly romantic or fantastical. they first lured panhandler josie sands back to their compound with promises of food and a warm bed when she admitted she couldn't get a bed at a shelter, and was thinking of getting caught shoplifting just so she could be under a roof in the county jail. the men of letters' leader, a man who took on the name alistair, forced his inner circle to dress in the ceremonial black robes he had given them when he initiated them into his nearest and dearest, and which his wife had sewn out of old bed sheets and dyed black with home made oak gall dye. these robes still left black smudges on the wearer's skin occasionally if they sweated too much. josie was laid, bound, on the altar, a slapdash thing constructed over the course of two days from scrap plywood and a couple of milk crates. a rich red tablecloth purchased at macy's for $3.99 hid its ugliness and gave it grandeur. alistair attempted to kill the struggling miss sands by bringing a sharpened kitchen knife down on her bosom and piercing her heart, but, having never killed a human or even slaughtered an animal before, was unaware of the problem presented by the human ribcage. after rather ineffectually poking at the area beneath sands' bosom with his knife while she shrieked in pain and terror for about ninety seconds, alistair tried a different tack, and slit her throat, which worked just fine, and she bled out quite nicely. the second and final victim of the men of letters was a local vagrant named larry ganem, an older gentleman who walked with a limp. he was lured back to the compound in approximately the same manner as sands, but instead of being bound, he was fed stew laced with sleeping pills. even if alistair hadn't slit his throat, he wouldn't have woken up. it's actually arguable whether he was still alive at time of sacrifice; mary winchester (eight months into her first pregnancy), who, as a member of the inner circle, was in attendance, actually tried to take ganem's pulse as he lay on the altar (now covered by a different tablecloth; the red one had turned stiff with sands' blood and been subsequently burned) and found nothing, so it is entirely possibly only sands' death can be directly laid at alistair's feet, and ganem's is the fault of mrs. ellen harvelle, who prepared the laced stew. regardless, these two deaths are lessons in the nature of human evil: it is very rarely skilled, suave, or smooth. it's often slapdash, half-hearted, and just plain incompetent. but that makes it no less grisly. alistair may have begun to drink his own kool-aid, as it were, and escalated this far out of genuine belief that the apocalypse was coming and it was up to him to stop it, but it is far more likely that he sensed the imminent collapse of his little empire, and wanted to bind his subjects to him through the horrors of shared guilt, considering two lives a small price to pay for the continued loyalty of his inner circle. and the tactic worked: the men of letters didn't start to collapse in earnest until almost four years later. perhaps if alistair had continued the killings, the men of letters could have lasted for far longer, maybe even up until the present day. but it seems that alistair, a psychiatrist by training and unused to violence, simply didn't have the stomach for it. unlike, say, john winchester, who before his time with the men of letters had done a two year tour in vietnam, during which he had killed three living, thinking human beings with the american government's go-ahead.)
anyway. castiel is the first person, ever, to make the connection between the men of letters and the sioux falls satanic slaughterer. and once that connection is made, castiel begins to research the men of letters far more in-depth. and he notices something: the theology of the men of letters was intensely numerological, filled with patterns, significant numbers, and even spiritual equations.
castiel thinks of the seemingly random selection of the slaughterer's victims, and has an epiphany.
he cracks all his fingers, and gets coding.
six months. it takes castiel six months to discover an equation that could fit the slaughterer's pattern. it's complex, but also clearly based on several of the men of letters' holy numbers, and accounts for every single one of the killings. it also suggests that there should have been two or three more deaths scattered across the years, but more than likely those did happen, it's just that they weren't reported as part of the slaughterer's portfolio.
but much more importantly, castiel's model can also make predictions. there will be two killings, fifteen days apart, in a city seven hours' drive away, six weeks from now.
so castiel waits. and he books a hotel room. and two months later, he's waiting outside 217 oak street when a shadowy figure climbs up a tree and lets itself into the upstairs window.
dean winchester is feeling particularly all alone in the world when he breaks into maisey banks' home (217 oak street). his father has been dead for half a decade, and he hasn't spoken to his baby brother for twice that. it's not like this whole grizzly saving the world business makes him a lot of friends. so once he's done killing maisey (which is easy, she was ninety three and dying of cancer anyway. she doesn't even wake up when he slits her throat) and arranging her corpse in the appropriate manner, with prayers and sigils, he turns around. and sees a man standing behind him.
smiling slightly.
as he watches dean gut this old woman.
dean freezes.
the man takes a step forward.
"you're very attractive for a serial killer who's been operating since the eighties."
dean is silent.
"family business, is it?"
silence continues.
"i'm not here to report you to police. i'm just here to see if my algorithm worked right."
and dean finally breaks his silence: "what the hell is wrong with you?"
what's fun here is that dean knows (or rather "knows") that he isn't a serial killer. so he finds what cas is doing, this amoral serial killer stormchasing, morally repugnant. because cas has no way of knowing he isn't a regular serial killer.
there's also the fact that that cas proceeds to flirt with him. aggressively. and follows him back to his motel.
but the thing is that dean is all alone in the world. and as cas continues trailing him around, he starts getting, well, flattered. and feeling a little bit less alone.
it doesn't take very long before they fall into bed. even if cas is an amoral stalker with a fetish for what dean considers a distasteful yet necessary vocation.
so. they fall into bed. they fall in love. they make a little life together, in dean's big sexy car. dean tries to explain to cas that he's saving the world. that these people's lives are a necessary price to pay. and cas seems to listen.
of course, castiel doesn't believe a word of it. but he's found that he likes dean. really likes him. and he realizes that the collapse of dean's belief system would destroy him.
so he sets about becoming as complicit in it as possible.
even to the extent where, when dean is hit by a car and ends up into the hospital a day before one killing is meant to take place, castiel agrees to take on the job. (he doesn't actually kill anyone, obviously. but he does use his extensive skill with computers to create three fake newspaper articles which make it look like he has.)
but five years later, something goes wrong. really, really wrong. dean miscalculates the formula. and by the time he checks his work, the actual date of the next kill, as demanded by the formula, has passed. in fact, so have three others. and the world didn't end.
dean collapses. he hyperventilates. all those people. all those people. for no reason. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people.
cas seems totally unfazed. dean stares at him in shock. but cas just takes dean in his arms, and whispers in his ear: "oh, dean, i never believed in the equation. i love you no matter what you've done."
and dean buries his face in cas' chest.
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withlovemark · 3 years
Text
i. favorite crime
summary: gender neutral idol! reader x idol! lucas 
words: 2.9k
a/n: welcome to the first story in the SOUR series! a little warning: lucas is kind of a dick here which was so hard for me because he’s literally my everything and he’s so precious to me!! but anyways, hope someone takes time out of their day to read it anyways!
a few things you should know: *this story features a series of flashbacks that will be marked with “---” // your group name is Melody // angst + fluff but mostly angst
-with love, c. 
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being in the public eye, every single action you take is watched, monitored and judged. 
and when it comes to loving someone? well, it’s definitely not easy. 
backstage at music core, the sounds of people hustling here and there, various t.v. 's playing the performances of whichever kpop group is currently performing yet none of it does a good job at distracting you from the loud beating of your heart as soon as you spotted him.
the boy that used to be “yours.” 
suddenly memories from the past resurfaced and you recall back to the first day you met him… in this same exact building.  
---
“hi,” 
“hi?”
“uhmm, can you move please?” the tall boy said awkwardly, his hand scratching the back of his neck. 
“oh i-uh, yeah, sorry,” you smile sheepishly, finally noticing that you were blocking the vending machine. 
you can’t help but stay and check him out, curiosity getting the best of you. “which group are you from?” 
“oh, uh nct,” he says excitedly, his eyes twinkling as confusion arose on your face which he probably caught on as he quickly added, “i’m uh one of the new members, it’s actually my first performance today,”
‘ah, makes sense,’ you thought to yourself. you don’t remember ever seeing the boy before today. you smile at him, giving him a small nod to assure him that you understood, 
“good luck on your performance, uhh…”
“lucas”
“good luck on your performance lucas,” giving him a small smile, you finally walk away and back into your room, leaving lucas to watch your retreating figure. 
---
“hey, you okay?? you look like you just saw a ghost,” your band member says, snapping you out of your thoughts.
“hmm? i'm fine, just a bit tired,” you reassured them
“here, i got you coffee,” they said, handing you your go to iced americano and you can’t help but smile at the warm memory the caffeinated drink brings. 
---
“ow!” 
“ohmygod, i am so sorry!” the boy who accidentally bumped into you panics, frantically running to the stationary where the cafe keeps all the napkins and then proceeding to try and wipe the coffee that has now spilled all over your shirt. 
you wince, thats definitely going to stain, “you’re supposed to dab not rub”
“huh?”
the boy finally looks up and you realize that you're looking into the same brown eyes you met with the week before. 
“uhh lucas, right?”
“aha yeah... y/n sunbaenim...im so sorry,” he says apologetically.
“sunbaenim?”
“well, you debuted before me,” lucas says, letting out a small, awkward grin, his hands again finding the back of his neck.
you scoff, “you can just call me y/n, sunbaenim makes me feel old and i'm pretty sure were the same age,” 
“ok y-y/n,” he tries it out at first, still feeling awkward at how your name rolls off his tongue.
“ok lucas,” the awkward tension getting heavier by the second and you can't help but laugh at the situation you’re in. lucas looks at you, bewildered at the fact that you’re not mad at him and soon his own laughter followed yours. 
“uhm, can i buy you a new shirt?”
you wave his offer off, “you don't have to?”
“but i feel bad,” he argues, the sincerity clear in his eyes
“ok how about you just buy me a new coffee?”
“but..but your shirt probably costs more!”
“it does,” you respond honestly,  “but i can’t really work properly without my daily dose of coffee,” you shrug, throwing him a small smile before grabbing one of his hands and dragging him along to the counter so you can finally get your fuel for the day. 
“can i get an iced american and also a uh..” lucas looks towards you, waiting for your order, “also an iced americano,” you respond. 
“sure, name?” the barista asks without even sparing the two of you a glance.
“xuxi”
“ok sir, we’ll call you once it’s ready,”
“thanks!” lucas says cheerfully, turning back to you as you guys head towards a table far from all the windows.
“xuxi huh?” you teased, “is that your fake alias?”
he giggles at your question “it’s actually my real name,” he admitted, “i'm not famous enough to have a fake alias yet,” he grinned. 
you match his expression, finding the boy in front of you adorable. “so… i watched your music core performance backstage that day,” you say, starting a conversation.
his eyes slightly widening while his cheeks were slowly being painted a soft pink. “wh-what did you think of it?”
“hmm,” placing your chin in the palm of your hands, you tease him pretending to think of an answer when you already knew exactly what you were going to say.
lucas sits in front of you, nervousness just oozing off of his body. there was something about you that makes him feel like the cats got his tongue. maybe because you’re one of the most popular idol in the industry right now but i mean, he is friends with mark lee, so it can’t be that.
“i think… you killed it,” you beamed.
lucas lets out the breath that he didn’t even know he was holding, a huge smile etching on his face but this was quickly out lived as soon as he heard the word “but…” come out of your lips.
he looks down, ready for the criticism that he was about to hear
“...you’re very different in real life,” you finish as he looks at you with a puzzled expression. he always thought that one of his best attributes was how real he was in front of the camera. how he never seems to hold back, and frankly, sometimes he thinks he’s showing too much of himself. 
“what do you mean?”
“well… boss lucas seemed to be very confident on that stage but xuxi seems like a cute, shy boy,” you replied. 
“im not shy!” he says a little too loudly, defending himself as you giggled at his outburst. 
“it’s just uh… you’re pretty and you make me nervous,” lucas continues, registering the words that left his mouth and regretting it as soon as it hit his ears. you stare at him, thinking of what to say to his sudden confession. 
“xuxi?” a low voice appears
“uh, yeah,”
“here’s your order,” the barista says, interrupting the stare down that the two of you were having. 
you clear your throat as lucas hands you your americano, “thanks for this xuxi,” you say, not really sure yourself if you're thanking him for the coffee or for the butterflies that erupted in your stomach.
--- 
“y/n, we have to go,” your band member says, breaking you out of your thoughts for the second time today. 
“wait, where are we going?”
“you weren’t listening huh?”
“uhh no...sorry,” you admit, smiling at your band member and hoping that they would take that as an apology. 
“we have to do a quick segment with wayv,”
“oh okay”
‘fuck.’
“hey, are you sure you’re okay?”
“yeah i'm fine, don't worry,” you chirped, a little too happy for your liking and you thank the heavens that your band member chose to be convinced. 
you make your way over the tiny box location where the segment was supposed to be held, plastering on your best smile as you and your group wait for cue cards and instructions from the crew. after a few minutes of you trying to calm your beating heart, wayv finally walks in and just to your fucking luck, lucas was placed at the front, right next to you. 
‘just great’ you think to yourself, ‘the universe must really hate me.’
you nod at him but you don’t turn to him. you don’t look him in the eye. you don’t say a word. he does the same. 
and you can’t help but think of how different it was from before. 
--- 
lucas has his hands around your face, playfully squishing your cheeks as punishment for telling a really corny joke.
“ok ok im sorry, please xuxi... let go of me,” you plead, looking straight into the beautiful brown eyes that you have grown accustomed to seeing. 
he giggles before letting go of your cheeks and wrapping you in a hug, the warmth of his body leaving a tingling sensation on your skin as you let out a sigh of relief. you’ve stumbled into lucas a couple times since the cafe and you took these mere coincidences as a sign that the universe wants you two together. 
however, starting a relationship wasn’t ideal with lucas’ career just starting to skyrocket and yours continuing to go beyond its peak and so you chose to not put a label on it. sneaking around here and there, trying not to get caught was, admittingly, very tiring.
but as you lay here with him on your bed, remnants from the night before on your sheets and the boy holding you like you were his and his only, you tell yourself that it’s all worth it. as tiring as it was, it was also fun. 
he made you feel alive. 
“are you thinking of how handsome your man is?” lucas teased. the more you got to know him, the more you realized that he was right. he wasn’t shy. in fact, he’s probably the most confident person you know and you could learn a thing or two from how he carries himself. 
he was so full of life, bringing with him the brightest of sunshines and the happiest of days. a breath of relief from the chaos that surrounds you. and you never want to lose him. 
“i'm thinking about how lucky i am to have you,” you admit, caressing his face softly.  this brings a smile to lucas’ face as he leaned down to plant a soft kiss upon your lips. everything about this moment was perfect. 
“i’m yours.” he whispered before attacking your face with kisses, each one feeling like a shooting star. 
‘yours,’ you thought. how ironic. was he actually yours if no one else knew he was? was he actually yours when people ask about him and you pretend you don’t know him? 
and you? 
were you his even though he hides you from the world? or when the two of you are at award shows and he doesn’t even spare you a glance? 
is this what it was like to belong to someone? 
---
“WayV, can you please give us a little bit of information about this song?” the mc’s voice rang out, snapping you back to reality.
“so, our song Say It is about realizing that the love you had for someone is just a lie even though you want to so badly believe that it wasn’t,” lucas responds before handing the mic to xiaojun so that he could give the audience a preview. 
you had to physically stop yourself from rolling your eyes at what he said. it’s a good thing you’ve been in this industry for a long time otherwise you would have yelled at him, cursed him, hell, maybe even hit him. you just wanted to be angry. 
because between the two of you, who lied? 
---
seated together on your couch, some random movie on netflix playing on the tv ahead, you can’t help but just admire the boy that was sometimes yours.
“what if we just tell people that we’re together?” you whisper, afraid of the answer that you’ll hear. 
lucas sighs. lately he’s realized that you’ve been wanting more from him but he couldn’t give you that. not because he couldn’t risk his career for you but because he didn’t want to. there was too much on the line for him. plus he was happy with things the way they are now so why couldn’t you be? it’s been like this since it started so why does it have to change? 
he wonders if he should just pretend that he didn’t hear you but he can tell from his peripheral vision that you were fixated solely on him and there’s no way you’re going to let this go tonight. 
“you know we can’t,” he said, eyebrows furrowing as he let go of the hand that was once clutched in his. 
“why not xuxi?” you say frustrated, “both of our dating bans are over, you’re not going to get in trouble,”
“why do we have to y/n?”
“because!”
“because what!?”
“because i’m tired of sneaking around like were fugitives! i’m tired of just seeing you at night time when no one’s looking! i want to tell the world that i love you! that you love me! why can't we do that?!” 
“because it would just be a lie.” he sneered, voice as cold as an icicle that just shot through your heart. 
you look at him, bewildered, as the boy refuses to meet your gaze. you reach out for his hands but he pulls back. instead he looks at you with an expression you can’t read, it was almost like his eyes held no emotion. the brown eyes you love were now black and you swear you’ve never felt fear until this moment. 
“xuxi… ” you whisper, your voice trembling
“i never said i loved you.”
and then you saw red.
“so what the fuck have we been doing for the past year? what was all this?” you say, your voice laced with both anger and pain but you tried to keep a calm composure. 
“a crime. something that never should’ve happened.”
and with that he grabbed his jacket and stormed off. leaving you there, doe-eyed, watching him flee the scene. 
---
“ok Melody, what’s Favorite Crime about ?” the mc continued as all pairs of eyes landed on you, waiting for an answer.
“well, this song is about loving someone so much that you’re willing to do everything to call them yours,” you explain, trying so badly to hide the pain that was begging to be let out. 
just like xiaojun, one of your band members sang a quick line before the MC continued with the segment. 
“well, since it seems like the theme for today is love, why don’t we do 3 different heart poses!” since you were trained idols, you all do exactly what the script says. it was all going great with only one heart pose left, until the mc read the next part of the script, “why don’t the people in the middle combine their hearts?”
and of course, who was in the middle? you and the devil himself. 
you give him the biggest, fakest smile before sticking out your half hearted shaped hand, lucas mirroring your actions. it was the first time you guys made eye contact but the small glimpse of his brown eyes was enough to remind you of all the pain that you went through. 
---
“xuxi, please just call me back or just come to my place, please, im sorry”
“let’s just talk it out please, i promise it won't happen again”
“hey, let’s just forget about everything that happened please? can you please meet me at the cafe”
“ok uhm i waited for you but you didn’t come, please just… just text me back at least? please xuxi”
“xuxi i know youre getting these, please”
“xuxi...i-i love you…”
every voicemail you sent was left with no response until one day you finally got your answer, 
“the number you are trying to reach is no longer in service.”
you wish you could say that there was more to this story. you wish you could say he came back for you but that was it. lucas debuted with superM quickly after which prompted for immediate promotions in america and completely no connection between the two of you. you wanted the screaming, the crying, the “i hate you’s” yet he left you with nothing but a bloody, broken heart. 
---
as soon as the segment was over, you ran. 
everything felt suffocating and you just needed to catch your breath. just for a second. you needed to get away from them, from him. yet the boy had other ideas as he quickly followed after you, your name easily leaving his lips like it meant nothing. 
after a while of just walking around aimlessly and bumping into a couple of people, lucas finally grabs your hand, dragging you to an empty room. 
“fuck y/n, just talk to me!” you stop thrashing against him, turning to him with a piercing gaze.
“talk to you?” you snickered, an almost cynical laugh leaving your lips, feeling insulted, “how could you ask for something you never gave me?”
“are you seriously still not over it?” he says rolling his eyes, an annoyed expression on his face and you realize that he didn’t even feel an ounce of regret. 
god, you wanted to punch him.
“over it? was it really that easy for you?” you jeered, trying to push away the tears that you could feel were slowly forming.
lucas scoffed, “it was your fault for assuming that this was something more than what it was.” 
“right.” you nodded, reality finally slapping you in the face. “it was nothing but a crime.” you finish, finally coming to your senses. 
“and apparently, your favorite,” lucas joked and all you could do was smile at him. your eyes burning holes to his head as you imagined the cruelest way to finish him off right there. 
“i hate you lucas.” 
a/n: thank you for reading! feedback is always welcomed!
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zackcrazyvalentine · 3 years
Note
Hiyo! This is gonna be a bit specific so i hope you dont mind haha;;
Would it be alright to request for HC's for Mammon, Beel and Belphie(if you only take one char per request then Mammon's fine!) with a GN! reader, where in the reader is extremely obssessed with bug critters? Like tarantulas, moths, all that jazz and they often have a lotta them in their room
Im a big bug lover myself but it often freaks people out when i show them a beetle i caught but honestly its just pretty funny to me more than anything haha
Sorry for this long ask!! And take care~☆
Oh~ this is an interesting prompt :o
I myself am squeamish with bugs, but very much respect enthusiasts and entomologists!
Without further ado, here’s your request!!
-- -- --
😈💛 Mammon 💰💸
“Yo... think we can sell these to witches for some cash? Y’kow, for their rituals and generally to keep as pets? Think ’bout- OW, HEY!!”
This one I see recoiling back once you show him a bug. Doesn’t matter if it’s trapped in a jar, or held by your hands, he will get surprised if the critter is shoved in his face
Back in the Devildom, if you ever wandered out and somehow caught one of the unique dangerous bugs within, he would freak out and worry about your safety
“WTF [Name], put that down!! Its bite/sting is dangerous and hurts a lot! PUT IT DOWN!” “Relax, Mammon, your panic will distress it and provoke it to attack! I’ve got this.”
However, in the first weeks of your stay with them, he won’t care at all. Remember how he acted all irritated and mad when you were lumped onto him, right? Yeah, that’s it
Things change when Lucifer gave a stern warning, in his own Lucifer way, to keep you safe at all times
“Drop that, you don’t want to anger it”  “How many times do I need to tell you to stop with that?! Pesky human..”  “Oi, ya dumb mortal! Hands off, no pets allowed!”
Little “I’m not interested” warning will be given, which then morph to “Not worried about you but in reality I very much am” as time goes on and he warms up to you (damn tsundere, this one)
Once he grows fond of you and a friendship is established (and maybe other feelings surface), he will issue the more panic filled warnings
But otherwise, he will admire the little things. The ones with shiny exoskeletons and vibrant colors immediately catch his eye
He will eventually look forward to see what new friends you bring, even more so once you go over to the human world
Just...keep an eye out for his typical Mammon shenanigans of taking stuff to sell. He knows witches who would absolutely love to have some of your critters so, watch out.
You may find him baby talking to a particular bug he’s fond of from time to time (Mammon and the cat audio drama~)
Takes some time for him to stop being squeamish and handle the bugs
Totally the one to look at whichever critter, point at it and go “haha...Lucifer/[any other of his brothers]” (he may have led you to name a scorpion ‘Asmo’)
If he sees accessories or keychains that are bug related, he’ll buy them for you  “D-Don’t take it out of context! It just reminded me of [bug] and thought of getting it… totallydidn’tremindmeofyou,no”
Any colorful and/or shiny insects interest him, but I can see him loving centi- and millipedes (and pill bugs too, but those are crustaceans aha)
👿❤️ Beelzebub 🍔🤤
“Ah, I can do that too!”   “Beel, don’t! My papers-!!”   *cue him buzzing his wings and all documents are blown away*
At the beginning of your friendship? He’d just be like “...cool…” and keep doing whatever he was doing
Not one to flinch away from the bugs (he welcomes them)
Tell him ants or X bug/s are exceptionally strong, and he’ll begin to take interest in your bug keeping shenanigans
He feels for them, the strength of the tiny things. He’s one half of the youngest brothers, and very physically capable, one could say he relates to them (so tiny, but oh so strong = youngest brother, but oh so buff)
His signature animal is a fly, claims he has a special connection to bugs, but this “sense” was previously not explored… until you came to his life~
Out of the three, I think Beel will be the one to get on with the idea faster, even helping you take care of the bugs. Will also go out of his way to catch a particularly eye catching one for you.
“[Name], look! This one was hanging out near me/was on my path when going somewhere, thought of you and caught it” (insert Reader’s heart full of soft feelings for this teddy bear)
He’s the enabler of you keeping dangerous Devildom bugs. He can do the catching if you’re afraid of getting hurt
Just say the word and he’ll help you clean enclosures, feed critters, free them back to nature, anything
Honestly, you may very well wake up a hidden talent and surprise hobby of his
Please, introduce this boy to any and every bug you come across in the human world! Show him pictures and tidbits of information about all of them, but more so the ones you previously told him are so strong
If you introduce him to an ant farm, he will sit down and eat his snacks while observing the colony closely
Not afraid to handle your bugs at all, likes the sensation of their little legs crawling up his arms
Says he doesn’t have favorites, but absolutely does (he sneaks his favs snacks from time to time, it’s so cute)  Beetles and ants are in his top 5
Mixed feelings about entomophagy (insect eating)
Congratulations! You now have a bug enthusiast buddy to fan with!
👿💜 Belphegor 🛏️💤
“That one’s fuzzy… Can I pet it, hold it maybe?”
Belphie is pretty chill in general, so I don’t see him making a fuzz whenever a bug is brought up to his face
He may act indifferent to your obsession at first, perhaps Beel’s curiosity rubs off on him eventually
Very curious about your moths and tarantulas, and bees (when you get the chance to introduce him to them)
He’s drawn to the fuzzy fluffy bugs because they look comfortable to pet and hold (and sleep with lol)
Beware: DO NOT wake him up to introduce him to a bug, he WILL be cranky. On the same note, don’t even DARE let a critter crawl on his body while sleeping, won’t hesitate to exterminate the thing
This one… edgy boy… The one to warm up and love your arachnids (technically not insects, but let’s let it slide~   remember you’re talking to a biology nerd here, me)
Introduce him to the deadly insects of your word and he will repay the favor by teaching you about any highly dangerous Devildom bugs he knows about
Butterfly magnet. Let your moths and butterflies free in the room and most likely, they’ll land on him. His calm demeanour seems to attract them
Along with Beel, he will invite yourself to you room to look at the fluttering wings of butterflies   “They lull me to sleep”
Perhaps the one that gained a soft spot in his heart is the tarantula. Relates to it in a sense: people are afraid to approach it when it’s actually quite chill (when not provoked)
If you have Madagascar roaches… This was one of the first times you saw him flinch and let out a (very monotone) yelp, the hissing spooked him good
He may buy a blanket with bug patterns on it because it reminds him of you, sleeps with it when missing you
He’s more of taking pictures and sending them to you if cool bugs, spiders, and even snails cross his path. He will text a “Reminds me of you”  “Cool bug”  “Is this a bug?” along with the pics
Up in the human world: PLEASE catch a jar of fireflies for this boy! His eyes will light up at the amazing little natural light bulbs trapped within
Will want to take some fireflies back to the Devildom bc they remind him of the night sky and its stars
A very chill boy towards your obsession, but will eventually encourage you to keep doing what you love
Thank you for your request~! This was great to think about, if I do say so myself Hope it is to your liking!
You take care as well, anon~ ❤️
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thesunicarusfellfor · 3 years
Text
Found (Outside the Screen) (CC!Dream x GN!Reader) Part 2
Request: That dream angst fuckin wrecked my heart..any chance for a part 2 with comfort(im not the og requester so if not thats fine its just OUGH my heart)
I have written this three times over because tumblr didn’t save it. THEN. Tumblr doesn’t show it to ANYONE unless they check my account. This happened to my Ranboo fic as well... I will honestly cry if no one sees this.
Once again. This is a completely fictitious story and version of Clay.
TW: Panic attacks, self deprecating thoughts,
"(Y/n)!"
His voice echoed through the house as you scrambled around corners to escape the possible wrath of your boyfriend. Or maybe even soon to be ex boyfriend.
Despite living in this house with him for a little over two years, it was beginning to feel like a maze. You couldn't tell which way was left and which way was right, your head spinning with panic as you gasped for breath.
He's gonna find you...
The house wasn't even that big, and quite an open concept, so you had no idea why you were finding it so confusing. All you knew at the moment was...
Get out.
Once your eyes landed on the door that lead out, you made a beeline towards it and flung it open. Maybe you should've known better than to attempt to run from the manhunt god...
The footsteps pounding against the floor not too far behind you startled you enough to jump outside and slam the door behind you in hopes of giving yourself enough time to run farther.
There were plenty of things failing to register in your mind as you ran down the empty sidewalks. Such as the poor choice (or lack) of shoes you were wearing, or even the heavy night rain pelting down on your shaking body.
Your lungs were burning.. But your brain had thrown itself so far into fight or flight mode that you had no care for anything around you, hardly blinking twice as the signs of unfamiliar street names flew past you.
Eventually, when you physically couldn't breathe any longer, you sat on a bench and took awhile to think. The consistent rain pelting down on your head was actually a decent grounder to help you snap yourself out of it... But that only caused more confusion and another wave of panic to wash over you.
Where... were you?
Doesn't matter. Don't go back.
Oh God... He hates you..
Why wouldn't he..?
He was too embarrassed to show you to his chat!
What did you do that was so embarrassing?
God.. What was so wrong with you that he stayed in his streaming room for days on end!?
Pulling your knees up to your chest, you choked back a few sobs, trying your best to keep what was left of your composure. Very quickly, however, you gave up on trying to hold yourself together and broke down, hiding your face in your knees.
Time seemed to pass by way too quickly but also way too slowly at the same time.. Like time itself was giving you the one finger salute. When you finally stopped crying, you leaned back against the back of the bench and gave a shaky sigh before you decided to attempt to think rationally again.
You had no clue where you were. Nothing looked familiar. What time is it? No clue, you don't have your... Your phone!
You quickly scrambled to your pocket to pull out the cellular device, and stared at the black screen for a few seconds. Anxiety was the reason for your hesitance as you stared into your reflection, frowning slightly. Without thinking twice, you pressed the button and the screen lit up with various arrays of colours.
78 Missed calls from Clay💚
2 Missed calls from George👓🇬🇧
7 Missed calls from Sapnap🔥
Was... He so mad that his friends were trying to yell at you too? You tilted your head slightly and scrolled through the other notifications on your lockscreen.
Twitter seemed to be losing their minds over your boyfriend's stream and wondering who the stranger was. Seeing the headlines flooded you with immeasurable guilt and you almost put your phone down again, if your phone didn't start buzzing.
You glanced down at the screen and say Clay was making call number 79... Man, he was persistent.. and he would probably continue to call until you answered...
Your finger hovered over the decline button, before slowly moving over and landing on the green one instead. "...Hello...?"
"(Y/n)...?" Had... He been crying...? "Oh my god! You're alive!" He gasped out with glee before giving a few sobs of... relief...?
"...You... Aren't... Mad?" You whispered very softly and hesitantly, your voice scratchy and sore from crying.
He sighed and there was a little bit of shuffling as well as a few male voices in the background. "No. Not in the slightest... Where are you? I want to apologize in person.. And when it doesn't sound like you're in a hurricane.."
You lifted your head up to look at the rain that was continuing to pelt down on you before looking around. "..I'm not sure.." You heard your partner echo your statement in question form as you looked for street signs through the rain. Glancing back at your phone, you saw the screen light up again, this time it was a warning label.
Your battery was almost dead...
"C-Clay.. My phone is going to die.." You murmured softly, your heart filling with dread as you turned down your brightness and closed any unnecessary apps.
There was a little bit of clattering and shuffling on the line as Clay hurriedly walked from the windows to the door, trying to see you from the home. "G-give me landmarks! Hurry!" He practically begged as you shot up from your bench, ignoring the burning soreness in your legs.
Spinning around quickly, you began listing off a few company buildings you saw, trying to shout over the rain and a few cars driving by. "Yeah-yeah! There's also that little sushi place beside the restaurant too.."
You heard the furious typing of his computer before another almost sob of relief. "You're on Rosewood Avenue... How the hell did you run that far? Okay, you're going to walk in the opposite direction of the sushi place until you reach a road called Miller Road, got that?" He waited for a verbal noise of agreement before continuing, "Once you get there, turn left and keep walking straight until you get to a steakhouse. I'll meet you half way, if you don't see me there, don't move unless you have to. Got it?" He asked firmly, with a small hint of desperation in his tone.
You rubbed your face as you mentally repeated the directions to yourself. "Yeah.. Yeah.. I got it." You began to walk along the sidewalks, your shoulders beginning to tremble from the water induced shivers trailing up and down your spine.
"..(Y/n)?"
"Yeah?"
"I lov-"
Your phone died..
Pulling the device away from your head, you pressed the buttons a few times before groaning and shoving it into your pockets as you began to walk.
Your mind was blurry but also hyper aware along the walk to the road where Clay told you to go. 'What was he going to say? If... He doesn't hate me... was he going to say- No.. no. He hadn't said that line in over a few months now.. No reason why he would say it now..' You mentally scolded yourself.
The rain didn't seem to be too keen on letting up as you walked through large rippling puddles. Your clothes were soaked, your hair completely drenched and you were pretty sure you were gonna need to buy a new phone with how much your current one was getting waterlogged..
You rose your arm to shield your face from the onslaught of water that a car had caused by driving through a large puddle before running your hand down your face.
Part of you was still a bit.. angry... at Clay... He had ignored you for so long and wanted nothing to do with you.. Then suddenly you spill hot coffee on yourself and then boom, you have the man more focused than when he has a good speed run seed. What about all those times you were begging him to come to bed, or at least eat dinner at the table with you? Did you only matter when you were in pain?
Biting your lip, you shook off the thought as you looked up again to see the steakhouse that you were directed to go to, the signs glowingly and people shuffling in and out through the doors...
Then there was another man, standing under a large black umbrella wearing a damp lime green hoodie...
Only you'd recognize that face anywhere where others wouldn't.. Standing in the street lights perfectly was your boyfriend, Clay.
Your heart trembled but also melted slightly upon seeing that he wasn't paying attention to his screen anymore. You. He was focused on finding you...
As you began to walk closer, you saw him lift his head and stare at you for a few seconds before dropping the umbrella and lunge forward to wrap you in a loving embrace. "I'm sorry.." Was the first thing he whispered, his voice almost as hoarse as yours. "I know.. that a simple apology will never excuse what I put you through... You cared for me, and even after a stupidly ignored you... You still didn't leave, or get angry. I don't deserve you, I know that, and you have every right to be upset, angry or whatever you're feeling right now.. Please, it doesn't matter how long it takes... Just let me make it up to you and let me prove myself worthy of your love again.."
Your lips parted in surprise as you stared at him, the streetlight poorly capturing his normal beauty, but still doing it well enough that you felt your heart soar. "Clay..." Your eyes traced his features, his puffy and reddened eyes and his cheeks stained with tear tracks, "You have a lot to work and make up for... I'm not going to forgive you immediately, but I'm not going to leave you.. We can work things out.. Together, okay?"
He eagerly nodded and gently held your face in his hands before pressing a light kiss to your forehead. "I'll break away from video editing and streaming for a while.. So I can focus on repairing things with you.."
You buried your face into the male's sweater, that was beginning to become soaked as well from the rain and you, and closed your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him.
"(Y/n)?"
"Mm..?"
"I love you."
"I love you too, Clay."
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mammonsvulva · 3 years
Note
Hi there! I just discovered your page and i loved the bachata headcannon!
On that same line, can you do a female latina headcannon? Like, more specifically, Colombian, you know, an MC that's like normally fluent in english but when mad she just burst on angry spanish screaming session with latin curses and a strong accent and also just getting really mad if deemed as Mexican by default? I'd love that! Thank youuuu (also feel free to ignored this if it's not of your fancy)
I hope you have a great day!
Of course! I really hope you like it! :)
(I tried to incorporate things some of my relatives say as Colombians please don’t hate me🥲)
The Brothers + Datables and a Latina MC with Colombian Habits
Lucifer❤️
Lucifer has always been amused by the boldness MC portrayed, that is until Mammon pissed her off
MC actually f*cking explodes, calling Mammon “culicagao” (like a bratty kid) and a bunch of profanities out of rage
Actually leaves Lucifer surprised, who could she hate so much that she’d put a curse on them?
Is actually kind of scared to speak up after she went silent, kinda just stares at her like “what the fuck do I do”
“I’ve told Mammon A THOUSAND TIMES. IM NOT F*CKING MEXICAN”
(Oooohh Mammons gonna get his ASS WHOOPED)
“MAAAAAAMMMMOOOOONNN????”
Mammon💛
Could learn a thing or two from MC, had some strong clap backs
Is counting his money when OUT OF NOWHERE MC just starts incanting a literal curse
Literally has his quaking in his boots dude, like he’s genuinely terrified
He can’t keep up with anything she’s saying and feels like his time to die has come
Doesn’t say A WORD when she calms down, jumps when she starts apologizing for reacting like that
“W-w-what happened? ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )”
“I LOST 10 GRAND IN BLACK JACK! ITS FUCKING RIGGED!”
Is genuinely more cautious for a while, kind of traumatized him
Mammon thought it’d be a great Idea to take her to meet one of his witches, MC already didn’t like her but listen to this
First thing the witch said was “Aren’t you that Mexican transfer student or whatever?”
(‘Oooh Ms. Girl you fucked up’)
Leviathan💙
Wishes he could have MCs confidence, ‘how does she respond like that 0•0’
He’s reading Manga while MC just lost on the same level for the 5th time
Accidentally shifts to his demon for he got so scared
Has to whip his tail up and grab the controller before she could slam it, genuinely terrified for his well being
Once she calms down she goes to give him a hug, to help with her frustration
*PANICS* “I-I can h-help you with that level, if y-you want..”
MC watches as he beats it with ease and heaves a sigh of relief, literally such a stupid game
Gets just as offended as MC when somebody said “I went to Mexico on vacation once, what was it like growing up there?”
Will let her handle it and he’ll be her Moral Support <3
Satan💚
Loved that MC was always ready, he was like that too being the Avatar of Wrath
Is genuinely amused when MC burst out swearing because she got a bad grade, he actually thought it was hilarious
Thinks of like a game to keep up with everything she’s shouting, makes her more upset
“What the fuck are you laughing at juemadre de la-“
“You’re Hot when you’re mad, Did you know that?”
Makes her go silent immediately, why is he like this, making people wanna act up on DIAVOLO
When they’re BOTH mad at something it’s like a f*cking BOMB RAID bro
They both just keep adding more, even when Satans speaking a Demon Dialect and MC is speaking Spanish LMAOO
When an arrogant soul decides to purposely mislabel MC as Mexican, the fool needs to count his seconds with MC and Satan both getting on his ass
Asmodeus💞
Has always liked the spunk MC had, it entertained him to watch her bicker with his brothers
Surprised, but not happy AT ALL with the fact that MC could blow up like that
Gets on MC for lashing out, “MC! THIS IS TERRIBLE FOR YOUR SKIN, DO YOU WANT WRINKLES?”
Gets MC to tell him what made her loose her cool like that
“That stupid b*tch from class posted saying “That Mexican transfer student isn’t pretty enough to be this annoying”
Almost explodes as bad as MC did
“MS. GIRL SHE SAID WHAT? Lemme hop on Devilgram and end her career real quick💖”
Devilgram post- Asmodeus 19:34: “Aw sweetie, Not everybody can be as gorgeous as MC and muah, but don’t go trying to drag her in the dirt with you. Filthy🥱”
No mercy on the haters💔
Beelzebub🧡
Like Asmo, found it entertaining to see MC bicker with his brothers every now and then
MC just couldn’t keep calm anymore when she messed up the recipe she was working on AGAIN
Beel becomes more concerned than scared, ‘Is she ok? :(‘
Gets up to hug MC, hoping it’ll help calm her down a bit
She explains that she kept ruining the dessert no matter how hard she tried
“MC, it’s ok to do it wrong, because it helps you learn how to do it right :)”
She’s tried again, except this time with Beel to help her :)
Gets upset when someone defaults MC as Mexican, knowing how much she hates it
He may be a teddy bear but man don’t f*ck with his Chef
Belphegor💜
Thought MC was amusing with the way she made sure everyone knew she wouldn’t take any BS
MC just happened to stub her toe while Belphie was sleeping, and now he’s awake, and heated
“What the f*ck happened?”
Is actually more concerned than upset, she wouldn’t lash out like that for no reason
When MC explains that a picture of her in the RAD Catalog still ended up being there even though she made it clear she was against it
“Oh, MC- you look good in every photo, I wouldn’t be upset about it”
Assures her it’s not a big deal and then invites her to come take a nap with him
Will mean mug the f*ck out of anyone who assumes MC is Mexican, because he finds extremely disrespectful (as it is)
Might commit homicide if they keep saying Mexican but I ain’t no snitch
+
Diavolo♥️
At first took MC as disrespectful, but learned it was only when she felt she was being disrespected (then by all means, go off)
Surprisingly, Diavolo speaks Spanish, but he still kind of struggles to keep up
He’s just laughing the whole time too, like MC isn’t furious
Later, MC calmly explains just some random student pissed her off again
“Who is this student you say? Do I need to have a chat with them as the Demon Lord of The Devildom? :)?”
Dia actually admires how passionate MC is about her home country, agrees that it’s disrespectful to mislabel someone
Because he can, Dia starts to learn about Colombian culture and throwing parties just for MC
Starts saying shit like “politas pa la rumba!” (I’ll buy beers for everyone¿) just to sound cool to MC
Barbatos💟
Barb doesn’t understand how someone could be so beautiful but so hostile sometimes, overall doesn’t really mind though
Is surprised that such things could conde from MC, kind of chuckles thinking about it
He figured he should try and step in to calm the situation
“Is there anything I can do to ease you, MC?”
It ended up being that Diavolo was completely ignoring her and brushing her aside when he never did that with Solomon
Asks if she’d like him to talk to Dia about it, since he may approach it better than she will
Barb will quietly correct anybody who believes her to be Mexican, just so MC won’t have to deal with their arrogance herself
Takes his free time and makes dishes from Colombia, or Colombian themed cookies or cupcakes to make MC happy :)
Simeon🤍
Is trying to teach MC better ways to respond to idiots, more Angelic ways
When MC blows up for the first time in front of him, the literal shock she sent him into omfg
*GASP* “MC?! WHY ARE YOU SAYING SUCH VILE THINGS?”
Like, HELLOOO? SHE DARES TO SAY SUCH THINGS IN AN ANGELS PRESENCE?
Helps to calm her down after showing distaste for her words
“You’re lips are to beautiful to speak such sinful things”
Will go on to give MC a long but kind lecture about why exploding like that is bad for her Aura and whatever
Will politely make it known that someone was wrong for assuming MC is Mexican, does get a bit irritated though
He now goes up to MC when she’s getting upset, to remind her to breathe and comfort her with a deep hug :)
“See? It’s ok MC~ just breathe in and out for me, ok? :)”
Solomon⚛️
Will piss MC off on purpose just to see her pop off, he LOVES it
Literally her #1 cheerleader when she blows up, adding on to what she’s upset about
“Period MC” “No way she said that! What a fugly b*tch” “Right, she’s just a hater”
Hypes her up all the time, even when she’s obviously in the wrong
Sol needs ALL the tea, pulls up like “who we talking shit about?”
Will get on someone’s ass just because, now think about when someone mislabels MC😳💥
Gives MC a sense of pride hearing him say “Cagué” when he messes up a potion, he obviously picked that up from her
Luke⛅️
Gets kinda (really) scared when MC becomes a little aggressive
Actually bursts out crying because he was scared MC was mas at him
MC traumatized this kid so bad, he ran to Simeon like he was getting chased be some demons
“M-m-mom is really m-mad and *sobs* I’m s-scared *sobs more*”
MC IMMEDIATELY feels super bad because she scared away his soul
Simeon, having talked to her about it already, mouthed “Apologize now.” In a very not polite manner, kinda scaring MC too🚫🧢
Has MC apologizing PROFUSELY, trying to explain it wasn’t Luke’s fault
Once he calms down, they go to bake cookies like usual, except this time he’s sniffing the whole time :( 💔
I really hope this fit what you asked for :( </3
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