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sincerelymarinette · 4 years

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A Recorded Life (50/50) - Miraculous Ladybug

Words: 1839 Chapter Summary: After defeating Hawkmoth, there are still a few things Team Miraculous has to round up. A month later, everyone is still coping, but there are things to look forward to. Author's Note: oh my gosh...the last chapter of this story! I've been writing this for over a year and I love it so much. Thank you so much for sticking around and reading, I appreciate it more than you know! Make sure to check back in a few weeks for the mini sequel!!

Prev / Mini Sequel part 1 / Masterlist

Epilogue

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One Month Later

"Don't be bemused, it's just the news," Nadja Chamack's voice rang through the TV, much less energetic than usual.

The five heroes sat on Marinette's couch, dressed in black, and emotionally exhausted. Everyone had tear-stained faces, and no one was saying anything, just sitting and coping.

"Just two hours after Emilie Agreste's proper burial, Gabriel Agreste has been found guilty for multiple counts of public endangerment, and multiple counts of kidnapping. We have reporters on the field seeing him being taken away," She reported, and the video turned to an overhead view of Gabriel Agreste in handcuffs, leaving the courthouse in the back of a police car. Adrien shut his eyes for a few seconds until the screen changed again.

Nadja continued. "His assistant, Nathalie Sancoeur, has also been charged with multiple counts of complicity but could be released early because she claims she was forced to help him. That is currently being investigated. We want to send a heartfelt message to our heroes to say thank you for keeping Paris safe and continuing to do so. The public will always support you, and we hope to see you at the statue ceremony in a few days."

Marinette squeezed Adrien's hand to remind him that she's there for him, and they would get through this together. All five of them were a mess, and just glad it was all over.

"This broadcast is dedicated to Emilie Agreste, may she finally rest in peace," Nadja said, and the TV went to commercial.

Adrien started crying again, not sure how much more he could cry before he ran out of tears. They all looked down, and Marinette shut the TV off, still holding Adrien.

---

Marinette focused her camera on her friends and pressed record, then took her seat. They definitely weren't ready to be on camera all the time, but they knew this video had to be made.

"Hi, I'm Marinette," She began the video, less energetic than her videos were used to. "And I've got my team with me. Today we're doing a final Q&A about being superheroes," Marinette said. "Like before, we will choose the questions to answer, as we still have to protect some things. But most questions will come from Twitter and YouTube," She clarified.

The team was still going through a lot, emotionally and psychically. Initially, they weren't going to make any videos until they were back to normal, or as normal as they could be, but once they all agreed to take a step back, a final Miraculous video needed to be made.

"There are still some sensitive topics," Alya piped up. "So Marinette and I have already chosen the ones we will be answering, and not all of us may answer every question," She explained, hoping it would keep people from commenting anything rude.

"Are we all ready to begin?" Marinette asked the group with a soft smile, and with a round of yes, she asked the first question. "Thank you guys so much. How are you doing? We care about you and value you more than you know," She read. "I'll start. I think it's safe to say we're still kind of a mess, but we're getting better every day. It feels like one weight is off my shoulders, for now, at least," Marinette said.

There were a few nods around her, agreeing. "My head is still a mess from everything. But we've been working through it together," Alya added. "It helps that we're all together, definitely."

Adrien cleared his throat. "Marinette said it straight. I'm a mess, and I can't be any more clear than that. But having a new schedule and helping around The Bakery keeps my mind busy, but there is a new stress of starting school," He said, forcing a chuckle at the end.

"Very true!" Chloé echoed. "At least then we'll all be focusing on something to keep us busy!" She said.

Nino didn't answer as most of the emotions were covered. "Speaking of school," Alya said. "Our next question asks what's next for you guys now that the Akuma threat is gone?" Alya asked.

"I guess this is as good a time as any to announce some updates for all of us!" Marinette said and took a deep breath. I'm sure you've all noticed my lack of uploads, for obvious reasons, and they will not be going back to how they used to be. That's because I will be busy studying at my top school for design!" She said, excitedly. "I do want to get back into uploading more fashion videos, and I hope I'll be able to incorporate stuff from school into them, so keep an eye out," She winked.

Marinette looked to Adrien to let him talk about his plans. "I am going to school to study business, so I can fully take over Agreste Fashion in a few years. Right now, it is being run by the CFO, and I will be working with him and his team to help me prepare for that responsibility. In a few years, the Agreste Fashion, you know now, will be completely different, and I hope the best designer out there will be willing to tag along," Adrien nudged Marinette with a smile.

She brushed it off with an eye roll and looked to Alya next. "The Ladyblog really took off with everything going on, and I have taken a job as a full-time reporter as well as going to school for writing!" Alya said. "It will be a change of pace, but I'm really excited. Chloé?" She directed.

"Plain and simple, I'm going to study politics," She said, not elaborating anymore.

"And possibly our most exciting one...Nino?" Marinette smiled wide and turned to him.

Nino jumped when he heard his name. "Oh yeah!" He said. "I'm going to be taking a year off because I'm going on tour with Jagged Stone!" Nino said and put his fist in the air in excitement.

Jagged Stone made the offer to Nino only a few days before, and everyone was excited for him, though sad he was going to be gone for so long. The questions continued on, asking about favorite things to do as heroes, what changes they would make to their costumes, if they could switch their Miraculous for another which one would it be, and some that weren't related to superheroes at all.

They talked about how their relationships with each other have changed, and also what they wish they could have done in high school.

"Now for what I'm sure you've all been wondering, why is this the last Miraculous superhero-related video?" Marinette said, and everyone's mood changed from having fun to being somber. "We, as a group, have decided to take a step back. At least for a little bit," She said. "Hawkmoth and the Akumas are over, and crime rates are very low. Plus, it gives us a chance to focus on something different," Marinette explained.

"We love being superheroes, but it's time," Adrien added, followed with nods form the team.

Marinette took a deep breath. "But! We do have an exciting announcement. This Saturday, we will be doing a stream with Jagged Stone to finally listen to his album and talk about all the work!" Marinette said, and everyone else murmured things about it. "Check the information below to be sure to listen with us!" She said. "But I think that's it for today. Thank you all so much for watching, and I hope you'll check out our social media," Marinette took a deep breath. "Bug out."

Marinette had the video out as fast as she could, and the comments flew in.

oh man, catch me crying right now i love you guys so much

i know this is an important step for them but im still sad that its the end of an era

BUG OUT BUG OUT BUG OUT

she said BUG OUT this cant be the end of ladybug and chat noir

I hope you guys know how much we love and value you! I hope you guys are feeling better and keep getting better. Excited for everything in the future!!

OMG CONGRATS GUYS on all your achievements! Can't wait to see what you all do! ESPECIALLY YOU mari and i cant wait to see what adrien does with Agreste Fashion!!

ugh i love you guys SO MUCH

i love that mari would choose to be chat like,,, can i see that please?

I'm so buying tickets to Jagged mostly for Nino !!

thank you guys so much <3

To say they were pleasantly surprised with the comments was an understatement.

---

Right after the video was uploaded and the team read through the comments, they sat in Marinette's home, waiting for their visitor. There were mixed feelings, and no one knew what to say. When there was a knock on the door, the air in the room grew thick.

"Hello, Master," Marinette said as she welcomed Master Fu into the home. The Kwamis floated behind their holders, clearly sad to be leaving, and not saying anything.

"Are you all ready?" He asked.

No one spoke, just looked at each other. "Well, that's good, because I would like to say something," Master Fu said. "You five are the best Miraculous holders. I am very proud of all of you for what you've accomplished while also having the stress of life," He said, and grabbed the Miracle Box out of his bag. "Which is why I want to pass this onto you, Marinette."

All five gasped, and Marinette was shocked. "W-what?" She asked, her jaw on the floor.

“My time as guardian of the Miraculous is up. I have been guarding these since I was just a boy, and Marinette and Adrien, you two were easily the best Ladybug and Black Cat there has ever been. You work well together and are true leaders. All five of you have the best teamwork I could have ever imagined, and after all you have been through with Hawkmoth, it is clear that it is time for a change," Master Fu said and handed the Miracle Box to Marinette, which she hesitantly grabbed. "Marinette, you were made to be Ladybug. You were made to be a Guardian."

Her friends began celebrating with wide smiles, clearly excited for Marinette. The Kwamis were exchanging confused looks as to what this meant, and Pollen was the one to speak up.

“Does this mean we can stay with our owners?” Pollen asked.

Marinette turned around, holding onto the Miracle Box tight. She took a deep breath and formed a smile. “You know, it’s probably a better idea to not have them all in one place. Who knows, maybe the world will need us again," She said, and everyone joined in a group hug. After all this stress, emotional and physical pain, it was time for them to live their lives, with their best friends (humans and Kwamis alike) by their side.

THE END

edit: (except now there’s a sequel)

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@lady-of-the-roses-and-lilies @bookishserendipity03 @avatheexceed @gkz10 @coccinellegirl @kat-thatoneweirdo @strawberryblondish @snow-swordswoman @lilgaga98 @evufries @toodaloo-kangaroo

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httpjeon · 5 years

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❝ blowing dandelions ❞ pjm ― m.

― summary:

as a child, you met park jimin. as an adult, the same jimin is much different.

badboy!jimin/reader | e2l, childhood friends | angst, fluff, smut | 7.8k ↬ content warnings: blowjob, deepthroating/facefucking, pet names, praise kink, dirty talk, cunnilingus, multiple orgasms, light pain kink, mentions of death (no one major), mean!jimin, crying, fighting, light physical abuse(he like shakes u), jimin gets in a fight, tae tries to keep the peace

a/n: it’s kind of long im sorry. also this is from a fic title game i played ages ago!

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You always think back to the summer when you were 10. It was a time where you held some of your best memories, a truly tranquil and happy time of your life. It had been the first time you left your home in Seoul to see the ocean. You and your family had rented a little home near the beach and you could always remember how much fun you had when your feet touched the ocean for the first time.

The fondest part was when you had met a little boy, his name was Jimin. You remembered his chubby cheeks and endearing smile; he was happy and bright and it was truly contagious. He lived in Busan, in fact, he lived near the ocean and since it was summer, he had all the time in the world to play in the sand.

“I’m here with my Mama!” He had declared oh so proudly while drawing nonsensical things in the sand.

It didn’t take you very long after meeting Jimin to learn his mother was his whole world, he went on and on about how much he loved her. He had told you, a sad smile on his face, that he didn’t have a dad around. It was just him and ‘Mama’.

Somewhere along the way, you found yourself developing a crush on the bubbly boy. Every morning he would come to the house, ringing the doorbell and asking if you were awake because he wanted to play. Your mothers would sit on the porch chatting and laughing while watching the two of you run around and laugh.

You taught him how to make flower crowns as well. There was a little patch of wildflowers you two had discovered one day and as Jimin watched you weave the flowers together he had begged you to teach him how to. At that age, you didn't know much about flower arranging and truthfully it didn't turn out very pretty. It was a mixture of small flower-like weeds and dandelions. His fingers shook slightly as his tongue was poked out in concentration.

You found yourself watching him with a huge grin on your face and your cheeks burning with the realization that you found him cute.

One particular evening, there were fireworks being set off and you and Jimin spent the entire day preparing to watch them. You had set out blankets and towels, even asking your mothers to prepare a little picnic for you -- which they readily agreed to.

So during that night, as you and Jimin watched the night sky explode in an array of colors that reflected off the ocean, you were happy. Small fingers intertwined together and shy eyes met; he was your first crush and you couldn't even find it in yourself to be embarrassed. Jimin had a certain quality about him that made you confident, you knew he wouldn't ever judge you.

Jimin was your first kiss -- at the tender age of 10 it was nothing but a little peck but it was meaningful.

As an adult, you still held to it than that soft boy from Busan that you spent 3 fateful summer months with was your first crush, first kiss, and first love.

Busan held a special place in your heart and you hadn't been able to return to the sea-side city since those days. So when you had the opportunity, you decided to apply to college there. You were eager to see the ocean again and also to escape the city of Seoul that you'd spent your whole life in.

Saying goodbye to your family was sad, heartbreaking even, but with your pet cat in his carrier and boxes of your belongings packed in the trunk...you felt ready.

The apartment you got wasn't spectacular by any means -- one bedroom and one bath. The kitchen was small and conjoined with the living room and there wasn't a designated space for eating. Still, you spent days decorating it until it was up to your tastes.

The apartment was near the place you stayed at that summer -- so when you walked outside you could smell the salt of the sea in the air. As a student away from home, your school helped you in getting a job -- coincidentally at a flower shop. It was fitting considering your major being in plant sciences.

In order to work full time, you mainly attended online courses while having to go on campus to take your exams.

You were happy.

You were working at the flower shop, Sweet Arrangements it was called, for a few months before you met Kim Taehyung. He had practically skipped his way into the shop, boxy smile and messy hair.

"Hey, you have Tulips by chance?" He asked and you noticed that his shirt was sticking to his chest with sweat.

"Yeah, you need them arranged?" You asked, resting your elbow on the desk with your chin in your hand.

"No, no I just need a couple alone," He responded, shoving his hands into his jeans pockets.

"They're right over there, we have a few selections for you to choose from," He followed your pointing finger, and scampered over to the corner where he squatted and began to pick a few of his chosen flowers.

"Alright," He breathes, placing a bunch on the table in front of you. With practiced ease, you clipped the stems a bit and wrapped them so they were bunched together. His dark eyes made you feel a little nervous for some reason, and you found yourself exhaling slowly to ease your racing heart. He was a very attractive man and there was no way you could deny that.

"That'll be ₩27,000,"

Flashing a smile, you took his money and wished him a nice day as he booked it out of the shop. You briefly wondered why he was in such a rush -- perhaps he forgot an important date for a girlfriend or boyfriend.

With that, it didn't take you long to realize how often Taehyung needed flowers. He would come in at least once a week asking for the same thing; simple tulips. You never asked why he wanted them until what felt like his 1000th visit.

"So, tell me why you always buy this specifically," You asked one day while you were cutting the stems for him.

"Oh, well, I actually put them on a grave," He said, smiling softly. "She really liked tulips,"

"Your mother?" You asked, immediately feeling bad for asking before shaking your head. "That was insensitive, I'm sorry,"

"No it's alright," He smiled, taking the flowers from your hands. "It's something like that. She was like a mother to me,"

"I see, well, I think it's very sweet of you to do this so much," The two of you fell into a weird silence, just sharing a strange atmosphere.

"Hey, I...I wanted to know since you moved here if you've had time to make any friends?" His sudden question shocked you, and you blinked, adjusting your position to shove your hands in your apron pockets.

"Not particularly, I mostly just work and go home," You responded, shrugging your shoulders.

"Well, I think that we'd get along really well and...you're pretty nice so...if you'd like, some friends and I are going out for dinner tonight if you want to tag along," He seemed quite sheepish as he spoke, scratching the back of his hand and biting his lip.

"Well, I get off work at 7," Your response seemed to shock him, his eyes snapping up to meet yours in wide surprise.

"That's perfect!" He grinned, a boxy bright smile. "I'll come by to pick you up and walk you there!"

You didn't get to say another word as he turned on his heel, running out the door with a final jingle of the bell. You watched him out the window, running down the street until he disappeared from sight.

The sun was setting when you stepped out from behind the counter, untying your work apron to hang on the hook for Monday. You felt your shoulders relax at the idea that you had two days off from work.

"I'll see you Monday, Kyungok!" You called the owner, who was watering the plants. She grinned, waving and giving you a small 'see you' before you stepped out the door.

"Oh, right on time!" Following the deep voice, you were met with Taehyung's boxy grin."Come on, the wing place is just a few blocks,"

As you walked, you asked Taehyung what his friends were like. You were a little nervous, it was always anxiety-inducing when you were meeting an already established group of friends.

"They're a good bunch of guys," He told you, a proud smile on his face. "Jin is the oldest and he kind of looks after us and makes sure we don't get into trouble, he also acts like the youngest sometimes. Yoongi is quiet but he seems cold but he's the quiet kind of kind but when he's drunk...he's loud, it's really fun. Hoseok is really loud and really bright, he laughs a lot and he's just really happy. Namjoon is kind of the one who we all really go to for everything, he's our confidant and he keeps everyone mellow -- really smart guy too. Jungkook is the youngest in our group and he's kind of a crackhead, he does a lot of stupid shit and usually is the reason for Jin's rage," He paused for a moment, seeming to think about something. "The last is Jimin, I'm not sure if he'll show up...he's kind of hit or miss. He's...how do I put it? He's kind of a troubled guy, he's got a pretty nasty temper and he's kind of cold but I've known him since we were kids so he's my best friend, to be honest. But on his good days he's really nice and he honestly really cares for us and always makes sure we're doing well,"

"They sound nice," You replied easily, though feeling a little more anxious after hearing of Jimin's mean tendencies.

"Here we are," You found yourself standing in front of a little out-of-the-way restaurant. There were only a few groups of people inside that you could see and as Taehyung opened the door, there was a loud cheer from a particular group of boys.

"Tae!" They called as Taehyung escorted you over.

"Guys, this is _____, she works at the flower shop!" He introduced, which resulted in several greetings and introductions.

Seokjin was a man with a beautifully sculpted face and wide shoulders. Yoongi was a small, pale guy with sharp eyes and blonde hair hanging in his face. Hoseok had the brightest smile you had ever seen and he greeted you with a warm hug (much to your shock). Namjoon wore circle lens glasses and was dressed immaculately, showing you a pretty dimpled smile. Jungkook had an adorable bunny smile that contradicted his muscular, tall build and all black clothing. Finally, Jimin who merely flicked a bored gaze to you before taking a sip of his drink.

It didn't take long before you were familiar with all the boys and even added to their group chat on your phone. It was almost startling how well you got along with them, making each other laugh and having dinner with them almost every Friday night.

The first time you witnessed Jimin's temper, however, you were sure that all the boys would never want to see you again. That you'd be cast out for making him upset like that and causing an argument between the group and Jimin.

Hoseok picked you up from the flower shop on a Friday, but instead of going to a restaurant, you were taken to an apartment complex.

"We're heading to Jimin's," Hoseok explained, a little bounce in his step and a serene smile on his face.

"Really? For what?" You were surprised, you hadn't been to Jimin's place before.

"I don't know really, Taehyung just told me to bring you here instead of the wing place," Hoseok explained, exiting the elevator onto the 5th floor which was apparently where Jimin lived.

Room 510, you remember the number being. After several knocks, the door was opened by Namjoon who grinned at the two of you -- even placing a kind hand on your head in greeting.

"Hey, you!" Taehyung called happily, coming down the stairs with a smile on his face.

"Why am I here?" You asked, taking a seat on the offered couch beside Jungkook, who was playing a video game. He still took a moment to smile and say hello when you sat down.

"Jin's cooking tonight and I thought it'd be great for you to taste some of his delicious food," Taehyung explained, dropping down onto the loveseat where Hoseok had taken a seat. Namjoon disappeared into the kitchen to presumably help Jin cook, Jungkook played video games, and Yoongi was curled up on a recliner watching something on his phone.

"That sounds lovely," You breathed, relaxing in your seat to watch Jungkook murk a bunch of zombies.

You didn't get to watch him for very long before Jin and Namjoon were setting the table with a delicious pot of shrimp fettuccine alfredo that smelled absolutely divine. Jin greeted you happily, cracking an unnecessary joke that had Yoongi groaning and Hoseok cracking up.

"Jimin, come down for dinner!" Jungkook shouted up the stairs after pausing the game while everyone else took a seat.

Heavy footsteps followed, though you were more interested in the steaming, delicious food Jin was piling into pristine white bowls. Your mouth was actually watering, it smelled divine and you didn't hesitate to tell Jin so, earning you the nicest hug and thank you from the man you'd ever received.

You learned quickly they greatly appreciated having a girl in their midst, not because they could flirt or date you -- but because you offered a nice sweetness and lightness with your femininity to the group that was otherwise missing.

The peaceful atmosphere was rudely disrupted by a harsh voice spewing curse words.

"What the fuck?" All heads snapped to the foot of the stairs where Jimin was standing with fists clenched at his sides. "Why the fuck is she here?"

"Oh Jimin," Jin greeted, completely disregarding Jimin's words to greet him.

"I asked a fucking question, I didn't invite her," His voice was so low, it was almost a growl and his chest was rising and falling rapidly.

"I invited her!" Taehyung chirped, completely unbothered by Jimin's growing temper.

"Why the fuck would you do that?! I don't want her here!" Jimin snapped, making you jump.

"She's our friend, Jimin," Yoongi spoke up, mouth full of pasta.

You were feeling increasingly uncomfortable with the way you were being talked about -- like you weren't here on top of his nasty words.

"Jimin, come on, just sit down," Hoseok sighed, frowning but looking quite concerned on top of that. "We all want her here, so let's just have a nice dinner,"

"Shut up, Hoseok," Jimin snapped, making the older man stiffen beside you.

"Watch it, Jimin," Hoseok warned, narrowing his eyes as he obviously tried to keep himself calm.

"I want you out," Jimin snarled, finally addressing you directly.

His tone of voice had you scrambling to your feet, accidentally knocking over an empty glass. With trembling hands, you picked it up and scampered back over to where you had kicked your shoes off.

"No, ____, don't leave!" Jungkook stood up, whining at you.

"Go, _____!" Jimin snapped, making you jump in surprise at his volume.

"I-I'll just head home," You muttered out, nearly stumbling in your haste to get your shoes on.

Before you shut the door, you caught sight of the boys frowns, watching you leave. You tried to offer a smile, but you're sure it didn't meet your eyes judging by the way Taehyung's shoulders slumped before the finalizing click of the door closing.

While you received apologies from the other boys, you didn't hear anything from Jimin. In fact, the next time you saw him, he completely ignored you. He showed no sympathy or any sign that he felt bad for kicking you out that night which only planted a seed in your head telling you he hated you.

Still, you were pleasantly surprised to be invited out once more after that horrible dinner night. From then on, you rarely ever went to Jimin's place -- just because you didn't know if it was a bad night or he really didn't want you around. You felt as if you were walking on eggshells around him, he made you quite nervous to accidentally step out of line.

You eventually decided to forgive and forget. You couldn't let someone's bad mood ruin good times that you could be having with your friends.

One day, you were asked to meet at your usual wing place by Namjoon. It was a bit unusual because you truly didn't hang out with Namjoon alone often, he was usually just an integral part of the group.

"So we're holding a little...get together," The way Namjoon attempted to ease you into it immediately had you on edge.

"...What are you planning?" You squinted suspiciously at him.

"I know you don't want to go to Jimin's after last time, but the party is at his place," Namjoon explained and you sighed, but before you could say anything he stopped you. "We already spoke to Jimin and we said if you weren't invited then we wouldn't have the party so he agreed!"

"He agreed to let me inside his house?" You asked, receiving a nod. "For the party?" Another nod.

"So you'll come right?" He asked, gazing at you over the rims of his glasses.

"Fine, I'll come," You sighed before immediately being brought into a bone-crushing hug.

"They'll be very happy to hear it," Namjoon grinned, beautiful dimples and shining smile.

"I'm sure," Your reply was a little dry, but Namjoon continued to smile despite it.

The two of you continued with your small lunch and you learned the boys had drawn straws to see who would have to talk you into coming.

The party was hosted on a Friday night and when you entered Jimin's apartment, you noticed how much food and alcohol there was available.

By the time you had arrived, the party had already begun with you being the last to show. Jimin and Taehyung were on the couch, both of them nursing red solo cups filled with who-knows-what. Hoseok, Namjoon, and Yoongi were all standing around the entrance to the kitchen chatting amongst themselves. Finally, Seokjin and Jungkook were bickering over what to play on the stereo -- Jin wanted chill music and Jungkook wanted something to jam to.

"Hey guys," You greeted softly, earning all of their attention at once.

"_____!" Various cries of your name along with muddled greetings.

Before you knew it, you were pulled into the party. Jungkook ended up winning, so strong bass and beats flowed from the speakers. You sipped from the generously filled up of alcohol while picking at the bowl of chips in front of you.

It didn't take you long to realize they'd all been drinking much longer than you had because within an hour 5 of the 7 men present were passed out drunk. The last men standing were Taehyung, and Namjoon.

Jungkook and Seokjin had gotten into a drink-off with Jungkook winning because he ended up running off to puke while Jin quite literally dropped to the floor and was out like a light. Hoseok's cheeks had turned red several minutes before he curled up complaining that the room was spinning, before promptly passing out. And Yoongi, you weren't sure if he passed out or just went to sleep. Jimin, you were sure, had probably been drinking the longest out of all of them as he was the first one to tap out and fall asleep on the couch.

Taehyung and Namjoon were having a little conversation, thought you couldn't quite make out what they were saying through the giggles and slurred words.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom," You mumbled, standing up and blinking several times as the room spun a bit.

Maybe you were drunker than you thought. Either way, that alcohol went right through you and you had to pee.

Scampering upstairs, you quietly slipped into the bathroom.

However, as you came back out, you couldn't help but notice Jimin's bedroom door was open. Maybe it was the alcohol flowing through your veins giving you courage or maybe it was just pure stupidity, but you slipped into his room.

The first thing you noticed was how lovely his room smelt, most likely due to the soft vanilla candle burning on his nightstand. His bed was unmade and a few articles of clothing were strewn about, including his favorite leather jacket laid across his bed.

However, the one thing that caught your attention was the big book labled photo album sitting on a shelf as if it were a shrine. You walked up to it and grabbed it, finding that there was absolutely no trace of dust on it -- it was either well used or well taken care of. Kind of strange for a photo album.

You took a seat on the edge of his bed with the album in your lap, flipping it open. The first page was a dedication page that simply said "Park Family".

Surely he wouldn't mind that much if you looked at it right? After all, it was just a family photo album. Plus this could be a great way to get to know more about him!

With that thought in mind, you began to flip through the pages. At first they were just old pictures, presumably his mother and father getting married. There were also some old highschool photos of his mother and father, and eventually you came across Jimin's baby photos. You smiled as you saw what a cute baby he was, chubby cheeks and all.

It wasn't until you got about 10 pages in that you began to notice something; Jimin looked awfully familiar as a child. As your suspicions rose, you continued to flip until you found the pictures of when Jimin was about 10.

He was on summer vacation at a beach and when you took note of a picture -- Jimin standing beside a young girl as both of them wore flower crowns made of yellow dandelions, two women stood behind them as they all smiled happily, you realized why he looked so familiar.

Fate had a funny way of playing games and for some reason she decided now was the time to start one.

Park Jimin, the bright boy who always had a smile on his face that you spent a wonderful summer watching fireworks reflect off the ocean; was the same Park Jimin who absolutely hated your very existence.

Part of you was thankful you made this discovery at that moment, because as soon as the puzzle pieces fell into place, a dark ominous voice came from the doorway.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

You nearly jumped out of your skin, turning your head to see Jimin standing there. He had his fists clenched at his sides and you swear you could see anger flashing in his eyes.

"J-Jimin--" Before you could explain yourself, Jimin was storming towards you and ripping the book from your hands.

"Who the fuck said you could go into my room?" He snapped, slamming the book closed but delicately placed it on the shelf as if he weren't even angry.

"I just...I thought..."

"You thought what?" He was growing angrier with every second that ticked by.

"I just wanted...to get to know you, but Jimin--" A harsh laugh cut you off, the man not giving you a second to get your complete thoughts out.

"Get to know me? What? So I could like you? Are you that desperate for people to like you that you have to be a little fucking creep and go through peoples shit?" He badgered you, asking questions that truly weren't meant to be answered. "I really don't see what they fucking like about you. You're a pest, you're nothing and I could go my whole life never seeing your pathetic face around me or my friends again,"

No matter how much his words cut you or how badly your eyes began to sting with tears, you still wanted to ask him one question.

"Where's your mom?"

He fell silent at that, staring down at where you still sat on his bed. Then, with terrifying stealth, he was in front of you. You could feel his breath fan your face from how close he was, his nose brushing yours and it could definitely be mistaken as him moving to kiss you if it weren't for the very apparent rage burning in his eyes.

"You..." He growled, his jaw clenching angrily. "You don't ever speak about my mother, do you understand?"

"But Jimin--" Again he cut you off, but this time he was violently grabbing you by the arm and hauling you to your feet.

You whimpered at his tight grip, reaching to push him away but his hold on you was much too strong. He was holding you by your upper arms and brought you close to him again.

"Do you," He breathed and you were sure you had never seen someone so angry. "understand me?"

When you failed to answer, he roughly shook you -- making you cry out. You couldn't understand how to boy you knew as a child could be this mean, cruel man.

"You're pathetic," He hissed, finally making the tears fall from your eyes. He simply laughed, finally releasing and stepping back. "Don't think crying is going to make me pity you,"

"J-Just listen, please," You choked out, sniffling softly when he scoffed.

"Get the fuck out of my home," He left no room for argument and you turned on your heel as fast as you could.

When you got downstairs, everyone but Taehyung was passed out. When he saw the tears falling down your cheeks and heard the little sobs come from your lips, he jumped up in surprise.

"______!"

"I'm leaving," You whispered, giving no other information as you grabbed your coat.

As you went to step out the door, he grabbed your arm -- where Jimin had been holding you earlier and you hissed. Taehyung quickly let go but didn't back off.

"What happened?"

"Don't worry about it, it was my fault," You whispered, stepping out and shutting the door behind you before Taehyung could say anything more.

As you laid in bed a couple nights later, you couldn't help but wonder what happened to Jimin. What had turned him into such an angry, volatile person that he was now. Then you thought about how he had responded to your question about his mother -- he had gotten so angry. He was such a mama's boy when you knew him, positively clinging to his mother skirt and holding her hand every chance he got.

Your thoughts were disrupted by your doorbell ringing. It wasn't too late but it was still past a courteous hour. You simply slid on an oversized cardigan that was sitting on a chair in the corner of your room.

You wished you could pretend to see Taehyung standing there, a sheepish smile on his face as he saw you. He had been blowing up your phone since that party, trying to fix what Jimin had done but you hadn't bothered answering him. It had only been a matter of time until he would show up -- and there he was.

"Hi..." You sighed at his small voice, like he was worried you would send him away. As much as you didn't want to face this problem, you didn't have the heart to send him back home. So you let him in.

It was when you attempted to offer him a drink that he opened the conversational door.

"Jimin's not a bad guy," He suddenly said, making you frown.

"Maybe not to his friends," You replied fiddling with the hem of your shorts.

"L-Look, he was mean I know!" He cried, taking one of your hands in his. "And he had no right to touch you like he did, but he's really not a bad guy. He's just temperamental and he's got some problems but --"

"What happened to him?"

"What do you mean?"

"To make him such...such an angry person?" Taehyung paused, seeming to not know how to go about responding to that question.

"It's really not my place to tell you," He finally settled on and you sighed. You should have anticipated that. As much as Taehyung wanted to redeem his best friend, he would never go about telling his secrets.

"I understand," You replied. "Well thank you for coming to talk to me Tae, but it's late and I really should get to bed,"

"_____,"

"It's okay, I'm not mad about it," You reassured, smiling when Taehyung's shoulders relaxed.

You never thought to expect that just the next evening, you would be meeting Jimin once again.

You had been asked to stay later to water the flowers and plants as Kyungok had a family emergency to attend to so you were left to lock up. However, just as you stepped out of the shop to begin your trek home, there was a terrible commotion from the small alleyway beside the shop. You weren’t going to investigate, simply planning on ignoring it and going home.

It seems fate wasn’t too keen on letting that happen because before you knew it you were sprawled on the pavement with a scraped knee and elbow.

“Oh shit!” A familiar voice had you looking around to investigate only to see the wide eyes of Park Jimin. “Are you okay?”

“Y-Yeah, I think so…” You muttered, dusting yourself off and shakily standing up. When you met his gaze, you were unsurprised to see nothing in them -- like being here was a chore. “What the hell was that about?”

“Got into a bit of scuffle, nothing to worry about,” He shrugged, shoving his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket like he didn’t have a care in the world.

“Over what?”

“Don’t worry about it,” He growled, glaring at you.

“Well I feel it’s my business when you’ve literally made me bleed, you jerk,” You grumbled, your words reminding you of the burning sting in your knee and elbow. When he didn’t reply, you scoffed and turned your back on him -- ready to walk away.

“Where the hell are you going?” He snapped, heavy footsteps following after you.

“Don’t worry about it!” You mocked, which seemed to only aggravate him more because he groaned behind you. “Stop following me!”

“Why? Does it annoy you?” He sounded much too pleased with himself, he was teasing you.

When you didn’t reply, the two of you fell into silence. If it hadn’t been for his heavy boot-clad footsteps behind you, you could have been mistaken that he was gone. He didn’t speak up again for another several minutes; asking why we were at the beach. At that, you froze and looked around, coming to the realization that you were in the place from that summer.

“This is…”

“I’m going home,” Jimin’s voice had lost all teasing tone it once had, and was instead empty and monotonous.

“Wait,” You grabbed his arm, halting him from moving.

“Let me go, I wanna go home,” He snapped.

“I know,”

“You know?” He scoffed, turning to look at you now. “What the hell do you mean you know?”

“I know why you don’t want to be here,”

“Shut up,” He snarled, ripping his arm from your grasp. “You don’t know shit!”

“Yes I do!” You cried, grappling onto him again. “When you were 11, you spent a summer here with your mom in one of the little beach houses down there!”

“What?” He softened immediately at your words, furrowing his brows together. “How did you know about that?”

“You were next door to me and my mom, we hung out all summer together,” You supplied, giving a sad smile.

“You’re lying, there’s no way…”

“I taught you to make flower crowns and you kissed me -- it was my first kiss,” Slowly, his look of disbelieving turned into one of shock.

“_____...her name...your name...and your mom--”

“Sooyoung,” You supplied, smiling when he softened completely.

“How can I really believe you?”

“I have a picture…” You pulled out your phone and went to your gallery -- the glare from your screen making you squint. “Here,”

It was a picture you’d asked your mom to send you after you found out about Jimin. You had asked for it just to make sure. When you showed it to Jimin -- just a picture of you and him holding hands on the porch of his beat house, he smiled. You swear Jimin had never smiled at anything you’d ever said or done and it filled you with a fluttery giddy feeling.

Then, the smile disappeared.

“She died…” He whispered, still staring at that picture. “About 2 months after you left, there was an accident -- dead on arrival,”

Before you knew what you were doing, you were pulling him in for a hug. He was warm and he smelled just like that vanilla candle that was once burning in his room. His shoulders shook as he sobbed into your shoulder, holding you tight as you consoled him.

“I was so lonely, all I could think about was how that summer was the happiest I’d been -- with you and Mom,” He stuttered for air as he spoke. “I’m so sorry I’ve been so horrible to you -- to everyone. I was just so...angry. I still am. I miss her so much, _____,”

“I know, Jimin,” You whispered, reaching up to gently stroke his hair, making him sigh. “I forgive you,”

“R-Really?” He whimpered.

“Yeah,” You pulled back lightly, getting a look at his teary eyes and trembling lips. You suddenly realized he had a little scrape on his cheek that was starting to cause his eye to bruise. “Come to mine, let’s get cleaned up and we can talk, okay?”

Once comfortably situated on your couch, you took a moment to clean your own scapes before sitting down to carefully disinfect and take care of Jimin’s so his cheek wouldn’t scar.

Neither of you realized how close your faces were together until you felt his breath fanning across your lips. When you met his eyes, you were shocked by the intensity in them; they were dark but help such deep emotion. Then, as if moving in slow motion, he leaned in to meet your lips in a kiss.

Your eyes fluttered closed, easily losing yourself in the kiss. His fingers cupped your jaw, angling your head so he could deepen the kiss. He lead it, completely dominating you but you truly couldn't care less as he let his tongue sneak into your mouth.

He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours and sighing.

"You're a better kisser than you were," His words had you laughing, playfully shoving his shoulder and in turn making him crack a smile.

"I was 10!"

"Well, you've gotten better," He teased, leaning in to kiss you once again.

You smiled into the kiss, your hands wandering up his chest to his shoulders to push his jacket off his shoulders. You could feel his body stiffen at the action and you could only hope he got the hint you were trying to convey. He seemed to, as he pulled away and tightening his grip on your chin.

"Are you sure you wanna do that, babygirl?" His tone was dark, full of dominant promise.

"Y-Yeah," You breathed, already feeling your body heating up at the way he was looking at you.

"Where's your bedroom?" You felt your heart speed up as you stood up, taking his hand in yours to lead down the hallway to your bedroom.

Despite the fact he had treated you horribly, you could see it in him that he was falling back into what he once was. Perhaps knowing who you were had helped taped some of the wounds his mother's death had left in him. You were from a happy part of his life and he appreciated that.

Before you could sit down on your bed, he caught you by the waist, fingers curiously inching your t-shirt up. In a flurry, you stripped your shirt off and let it flutter to the ground silently. His lips were on your neck in an instant, nipping and licking along the skin of your shoulder and collarbone. His fingers were rough, callused as he caressed you -- wanting to touch every inch of your skin that he could.

Before he could reach your bra to take it off, you were pushing his shirt up to pull over his head. The material scattered his hair, fluffing it up and making it messier than it already was. As you looked at his body, you noticed a small tattoo located on his ribs. Tracing your fingers over the ink, you noticed they were dates -- no doubt dates to do with his mother. He smiled sadly at you for a split second before pulling you into another kiss.

"Let me suck you off?" You asked, biting your lip as you gazed up at him through your lashed. He groaned, nodding his consent before you took a seat on the edge of the bed. You were at just the right height now. Mentally, you thanked the gods that you wouldn't end up with rug burn on your knees over this.

The veins in his hands bulged through the skin as he pulled his belt from the loops and dropped it on the floor -- the carpet muffling the noise. He flicked open the button, the zipper easily coming down afterwards and you felt yourself gush into your panties when you noticed he was bare beneath them.

"No underwear?" You asked softly, earning a cocky smirk from him.

"Go ahead and touch, princess,"

Truth be told, he wasn't spectacularly long but he was thick in a way they you knew would leave a delicious burn in the wake of him stretching you open. Precum beaded at the tip and as you wrapped your fingers around him, you could feel his pulse through the velvety soft skin.

Leaning your head down, you swirled your tongue around the pretty pink head of him. He groaned, fingers finding their way into your hair -- a soothing sting settling in your scalp at the force he was holding you. The deeper you took him into your mouth, the harder he got. His precum was sweet, hot, and a little bitter and you were eager to taste more on your tongue. Glancing up at him through your lashes, you were met with the sight of his lidded eyes and thick bottom lip tucked between his teeth. He was tense, eyes paying close attention as you sucked him off.

"Take me all the way," He ordered, using his grip on your hair to urge you to take him until he was edging his way down your throat, past your gag reflex.

He groaned, cussing explicitly when your nose met his pelvis. Your eyes were watering, a few stray tears tipping past your lash line. It felt dirty when his hand, abandoning its anchor in your hair to cup your throat where it was stretching and bulging as it contained his thick cock.

After several seconds, you pulled up with a soft gasp, spit dribbling past your lips and down your chin as you did so.

"Messy baby," He cooed, wiping some off your chin only to pop the digit in his mouth with a sigh. "Let me see your pretty tits, yeah?"

As he leaned over you, you took his cock into your mouth again. He groaned, but continued on with his task of undoing the clasp of your bra. When it was freed, he tossed the fabric away and stood up straight to gaze at your bare breasts.

"Will you let me fuck your throat, baby?" He asked, reaching down to cup one of your breasts as you continued to suck him off. You nodded, refusing to free your mouth of him to answer. He muttered a little praise of 'good girl' before bracing himself to begin thrusting into your mouth.

You relaxed your throat, getting used to the first few shallow thrusts -- just a little taste of what was to come.

When your hands gripped his thighs, it was like a band snapping and then he was fucking your throat. He held nothing back, making you choke and gag around him. He groaned, feeling how tight and hot your throat was around him and it only turned into a moan when you cupped his ball -- full and heavy against your palm.

"Dirty girl," He chuckled, bangs matted to his forehead with sweat.

By the time he was done, everything was messy with your spit and he was sticky with sweat. Once you caught your breath, you leaned forward to press a light kiss to the tip of him -- his precum and your own saliva mixing together.

"Fuck, you're so good," He cooed, picking up his disposed shirt to clean up your mouth and chest where you had drooled down onto.

"Thank you," You replied, a little smirk on your lips which made him chuckle.

"How about I pay you back, hm? For being such a good girl," You nodded, already feeling excited. "Lay back for me,"

You did as he asked with no hesitation, getting yourself comfortable in your pillows. He stripped off his jeans, leaving him bare before you while also giving you a little show. You decided to follow his lead to save a little work and by the time he crawled onto the bed you were naked as well.

He didn't waste a single second situating himself between your thighs -- spreading your thighs for him to expose your wet cunt to his greedy eyes. His lips were swollen from being bitten but they felt phenomenal capturing your clit between them.

"Mmm, such a pretty little cunt, baby," He cooed after releasing the bud, swirling his tongue around it to make you whine. "You're so sensitive too huh? When was the last time you let someone eat your pussy?"

"I-I--" You gasped when his tongue found its way into your pulsing hole -- moaning at your taste.

"Answer me," He growled, voice muffled.

"I don't remember! A-A little while," You admitted, feeling your face burn at the admission of not getting laid in so long.

"Hmm, how sad," He smirked, introducing two fingers he used to spread your folds. "A cunt this pretty should be eaten every day, I think,"

You face burned further at his words -- he had such a dirty mouth.

He didn't seem to expect an answer this time because he dove back in -- eating you out like a man starved. You were almost close already; maybe you were needy than you had thought. Or perhaps it was just Jimin's impact on your body.

"Ah, if you're gonna cum," He stopped, grinning wolfishly before laying beside you on the bed. "it's gonna be on my cock,"

Taking the hint, you straddled his hips. He gripped his own cock, helping you lower yourself down onto him. He hadn't prepared your entrance very well so there was quite a sting but fuck did it feel good. When you bottomed down, you were were trembling.

"Go ahead, baby," He encouraged, holding your waist as you eagerly started to ride him.

You whined, gripping his hands on your body as the pleasure began to rise once more -- remnants of your denied orgasm.

"Close?" He breathed, abandoning his hold on one of your sides to find your clit with his deft thumb. Circling the throbbing, swollen little bud had you flying over the edge into your orgasm.

"Fuck!" You cried, tossing your head back as your body trembled. Jimin groaned beneath you, feeling the way your cunt tried to milk him of his own orgasm -- which he expertly held back.

As you settled down, panting and trembling calming but you were still speared on his cock.

"Such a good girl," He cooed, sitting up to press a kiss to your lips before your world suddenly flipped and you found yourself on your back with Jimin on top of you.

He was fucking you again -- hips moving at a breakneck speed as the head of his cock nailed your g-spot with crippling accuracy. You were still so sensitive from your orgasm that you couldn't help but claw at his back -- probably drawing blood. He didn't seem to mind, however, as the prick of pain only seemed to spur him on.

You were thrown into an orgasm once again, your eyes rolling back as you cried out his name. This time Jimin couldn't hold his orgasm back -- spilling into you with a soft whine into your chest.

The everything was still. It felt like an hour passed before he moved, pulling out of you and getting up.

You felt oddly cold without him near. He came out of the bathroom with a towel -- one that was in the cabinet. You didn't really peg Jimin as one to really care enough to clean up his partner but tonight had opened a lot of doors of unexpectedness from him.

"Can I crash here tonight?" He asked suddenly as he cleaned the last bit of his cum off your thighs.

"Yeah of course," You replied easily, feeling giddy from having him with you for longer.

He crawled into bed with you -- neither of you really caring or feeling like stripping the bed or putting clothes on. It was a problem for tomorrow.

Then, under the blanket of darkness after he turned out the light, he pulled you close to his body.

"I don't wanna lose you, ____," He whispered, his breath fanning across your face.

"Me either," You also whispered, any louder feeling wrong.

"I hope you'll stay by my side and forgive me for how I've treated you,"

"I already do, Jimin," You kissed his cheek, smiling at him through the darkness. "And I'm not going to go anywhere, I promise,"

"Do you remember that summer, it was the last day and we both knew we weren't going to see each other again," He started, tightening his hold on you. "And we were making wishes by blowing dandelions?"

"Yeah, I remember,"

"I wished that I would be as happy as I was then again one day," He confessed, nuzzling you softly. "And I think I'm that road now,"

#bts smut #jimin smut #bts scenarios #jimin scenarios #bts imagines #jimin imagines #bts reactions #jimin reactions #jimin preferences #bts preferences #bts fanfic #jimin fanfic

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bellamygateoldblog · 4 years

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best and worst relationships?

There’s a lot of varables to consider here, and I’m feeling sick and bored out of my mind, so i’m going the long way round. This is a nightmare to read on mobile, im so sorry.

‘Best’ and ‘Worst’ labels depend on a number of things:

— Story of the pairing

— General intrigue and how enjoyable their dynamic is to watch

— Chemistry of the two (or more) characters

— Presence (or lack of) valuable relationship qualities (is this relationship healthy according to the world it exists in?)

and the importance of each of those differs from person-to-person.

Note: Sticking to popular relationships. I’ve blocked names, but I’m also throwing it under a Read More because it’s long and negative. It’s largely anticlarke because she’s a terrifying character and her mere existence derails most of her dynamics. Ship and like whatever you like, I hate fandom gatekeeping. But you asked so let’s go.

There’s also no order to this. Welcome to chaos land.

Best ‘Best’ List: objectively good relationships

— Linctavia

— Marper

— Spacekru

— David and Nate Miller

— Raven and Sinclair

Unconditional love, mutual respect and support, found family, would die (and live) for the other. I can’t find fault in them.

Memori

I had a bit more to say about this one because there’s something so highly romantic in two people abandoned by their clan, cast out, finding each other in a literal desert wasteland. Like they’re each other’s oasis. In meeting Emori, Murphy finally found acceptance after spending far too long alone, and being told he was worthless by people who’s approval meant something. And Emori having someone prepared to do whatever it takes to protect her and make her happy is everything I could’ve wanted for her. They’re so deeply in love.

Best List

Becho (pre-season six)

Your local enemies-to-lovers. partnership over co-dependency. Compromise. Affection and emotional support from both sides. Willing to throw themselves right into line-of-fire for the other. A cut ‘i love her’ scene which i’ve personally decided wasn’t cut. I LOVE THEM.

Arguments against:

- ‘killed’ Gina (moreso she aided her death) while acting on orders from her superiors

- ‘killed’ Octavia while acting on orders from her superiors

- killed Ilian/ attempted to help Roan win conclave over Octavia

- almost killed Clarke (season five)

- happened offscreen

Arguments to discredit previous arguments because I’m sick and tired of seeing them in the pro tags:

- Echo was Bellamy’s enemy through those first three listed events. Bellamy had no reason to expect loyalty or respect, or anything else from her. She was always looking out for her people just as Bellamy was his own. That was quite clear.

- In fact she actually tried to help Gina because she was important to Bellamy, apologised that she couldn’t and did save Bellamy’s life despite their enemy status.

- ‘killing’ Octavia was not in cold blood. It was actually an accident.

- This one is nonsense. She wanted to kill Clarke during season five “even though she’s important to Bellamy”…after she just left him to brutally die and held Echo and her family at gunpoint and threatened to kill them. Context matters.

- not a fan of the time jump either, but if you’re able to accept the Madi-Clarke relationship which also developed offscreen, you can deal with this one.

Hard to talk about this one without defending it. Echo deserves better than season six Bellamy, who would abandon her in order to chase a woman he knew for 6-ish months 6 years ago. I say it’s his loss.

Jonty

It was a beautiful relationship and then a beautiful breakdown of one. I really enjoyed their dynamic. About to get controversial and suggest Monty could’ve taken a different approach with Jasper. I’ve never committed genocide and had to learn to live with it while watching my best friend suffer from the decision, but I do have clinical depression and somewhat relate to Jasper. There was this scene, where in the background you see Jasper go to hug Monty goodbye and he avoids it. It was such a small but sad detail. I felt Monty wanted Jasper to deal with his grief in a certain way and got frustrated when he didn’t. Sometimes he could be insensitive and blaming, and i think had there been more communication their friendship could’ve been very healing for the both of them. I think we learn at one point Jasper actually thought Monty was “fine” and didn’t even realise or understand that Monty hurt too. Jasper had this tendancy to only consider his own feelings, and this put a rift between them. Tough love doesn’t work for everyone, and I think Monty’s sometimes cold approach held that rift in place. The simple fact that both sides are so easy to understand and empathise with, and that this gradual undoing of what was once an incredibly strong bond was inevitable, made watching it all wonderfully bittersweet.

Zaven

This was good, but it was so rushed it made me bitter towards them. While it was Raven being thrown with yet another random guy, this did strike me as much more meaningful than her fling with Wick and I think it would’ve been a lovely relationship had it been able to continue. I think this was that love Raven deserved. It’s a damn shame it was used as just another level of torture for her. I think if they had let it develop more naturally and not been so full-on so soon, and of course if the actor hadn’t opted to leave the show, this would’ve been up on my best ‘best’ list.

Dropping this here: being intelligent isn’t actually important when pairing Raven up. Fandom acts like she needs someone “on her level” or “at her speed” (shudders), someone to challenge her, which has always come across as very demeaning of characters with less intellectual capacity, as if they’re less than Raven because of this when they are absolutely not. This mentality also denies Raven of partners that can value her and treat her well just because they aren’t Stephan Hawking. A romance isn’t a competition or a class project. Shaw was good for her, not because of what his brain could do, but because of who he was.

Bellamy and Octavia

This bitch toxic, YEET. I adore it. I really do. It’s such an intriuging and complex dynamic. The poisonous nature of their relationship is neither of their own faults, they’re both a victim of their own circumstances and, in Octavia’s case, a lack of socialisation and, by extension, non-understanding of grey area is also intrinsicaly linked to it. They truely love one another, but aren’t learned in how to show this in healthy ways. Makes that back-and-forth an entertaining watch.

Main grievance:

Beating your brother bloody while he’s chained down and unable to defend himself against you is disturbing and inexcusable in any context, and whether or not you’re grieving is irrelevant.

Neutral List

C//exa

Placing this one here just because i don’t care about this relationship, but did like bits and pieces. I think this one ended before it even started. For me most of it’s appeal is in the gradual moulding of the dynamic and the many phases it went through. I did find intrigue in that journey. However the fact the show reminds me at least a few times a season that Lexa was the one has me digging my heels in. I hate being told what to think.

I don’t really remember it all that well so I don’t necessarily have strong opinions. I know some people do. At this point in the show I was growing more and more annoyed with Clarke, and eventually i went from liking Lexa to being indifferent to her, so a dynamic consisting of them both was the least interesting thing in the world to me by the time it started heating up.

I will say this is probably one of the only significant relationships Clarke has where she doesn’t ultimately have more power than the other half. There isn’t a mechanism there that allows one to use to do harm to the other to advantage themselves; Lexa is the commander, but Clarke is constantly pushing back and Lexa respects and listens to what she has to say. There is literally a shot of Clarke backing the most powerful person on the ground into a table. I think Clarke was a positive influence on Lexa, but during this time Clarke was slipping into worse and worse versions of herself.

Some thoughts:

I found it was innappropriate for Clarke, as a leader of her people who’s primary concern is supposed to be what’s best for them, to have become romantically involved with the commander of the people they hadn’t a stable relationship with, and who ultimately has the power to strip them of all freedoms. It’s so easy for those romantically and sexually charged feelings to cloud and confuse what are extremely important considerations to be made about the people back home. It wasn’t a very responsible relationship.

On the flipside of that, from this relationship Lexa was convinced to grow into peace. Which is quite obviously a positive affect. Though I found it was odd that Clarke, just a random teenage girl from space, would be (successfully) telling the commander how to manage her people when she herself was not at home overseeing the climate of her own. It just has some very weird implications.

Lexa’s betrayal at mount weather, actually a very silly and counter-productive decision, was what forced Clarke to lose her humanity in what was the most traumatic event of her entire life. The fact it was forgiven so easily was hard for me to get over.

M//rphamy

Season five was good for them. It seemed as if they’d grown, were much closer, more respectful, and more affectionate. Then season six happened, and Bellamy was back to treating Murphy like he was beneath everyone. He started again to talk about how therapeutic it would be to hurt him, as he has, physically, many times in the past. Just tearing open old wounds at this point. In season five he reminded Murphy he wasn’t worthless, that he did belong with the group, but in season six he went back on all that, and put Clarke ahead of him at every turn, and prioritied her feelings over his very real pain. They’ve had a complicated history of violence, usually coming from Bellamy’s more hot-headed side.

I put this here because it’s an immensely compelling dynamic. These characters work well together, there’s heaps of chemistry and allure in each of their interactions. It’s just an entertaining time whenever they share scenes. But despite that, I don’t know where I stand with them and I don’t know where they stand with each other as of season six.

Worst List

Be//arke

There is a mess of negative thoughts inspired by this relationship about proportionate to the amount it’s shoved in my face. Clarke is just no good for Bellamy. Is the concise way of putting it.

Here’s a list of some of them which I usually like to bury deep inside my head for sanity purposes:

Ignoring whether or not actions were for the people/the only option and focusing solely on how the relationship is affected by them regardless

- Clarke has a tendancy to view the most important person (pre-season five) in Bellamy’s life as necessary collateral damage. She has brought/almost brought harm to Octavia on multiple occasions, the two most notable being TonDC and the conclave. Both while being on the same side as Bellamy from a political standpoint, and both while his friend who he had reason to expect affirmation, consideration, and loyalty from. Clarke betrays those key values. This happens again in season five when Clarke’s Plan-A solution is to “take her out.”

( this is also what sets her apart from Echo, who was never in the position to make her own choices. Clarke has that agency and control that Echo’s superiors had, but never Echo. )

- and saying that, I think it’s incredibly hard for Clarke to maintain any meaningful relationships being in the position she’s in. How do you have friends when you have to always put them second?

- speaking of the conclave, Clarke held Bellamy at gunpoint in order to prevent him saving his sister’s life. She said she “didn’t pull the trigger” and that was that. All is forgiven. However she did pull the trigger in what was an attempt to scare him into submission so I really don’t even know what to say here. The writers kinda forgot?

- they aren’t equal. They haven’t been co-leaders since season one. He was demoted almost immediately to second-in-command beneath Clarke. Clarke is the leader, the literal head. She makes the choices while Bellamy gets her out of the trouble she usually gets herself into, risking himself and others in the process. It’s a racist trope. It’s the ‘white princess and her brown knight.’ She has agency and power and he’s her loyal soldier, subordinate. Inequality isn’t inherently a bad thing but this power imbalance between them is utilised in harmful ways.

- speaking of “the good knight by his queen’s side,” this comes across as codependency. Clarke relies on Bellamy’s support, validation and loyalty, while ‘the heart needs the head to tell it to beat.’ That’s paraphrased from season six, that’s an actual line in the show. Bellamy needs her to guide him, to “keep [him] centred,” that’s another line from the show. That’s still not enough? He literally tells us in season six that he needs her, and has needed her in the past if his psychosis episode is anything to go by. He has impeccably low self esteem and views himself less than. I mean if you need further convincing of they’re inequality, just look to their places on the ark which are quickly reinstated once it reaches the ground. Clarke is upper class, she’s later the daughter of the chancellor, she comes from a loving family, from one of (if not, the) more well-off stations, she’s educated and she has passions, but Bellamy? From the poorest ark station, raised by an emotionally abusive mother, a janitor, his whole motivation his entire life has been to love and protect Octavia. I think a lot of this devotion he has for her comes from a place of idolisation, of seeing something in her he wants for himself.

- now this ugly trope could also come from an absense of Octavia. The moment they get to the ground Octavia is on a journey of self-discovery. And eventually, she becomes her own protector, and she finds a home in Lincoln. So naturally Bellamy looks for the closest relationship he can find that resembles that old one. It’s Bellamy and Clarke. Now, instead of Octavia, he’s driven by and found purpose in protecting Clarke. In fact, the Clarke-Bellamy dynamic has so many similarities to the Octavia-Bellamy one I can absolutely see the sibling like quality to Be//arke.

- Clarke abandons Bellamy after mount weather. She leaves because she can’t bare the reminder of “what [she] did to get them here.” So she leaves and instead Bellamy is the one forced to see the faces of the 48 every day, reminding him of what he did to get them there. Clarke comes across as completely oblivious in this entire situation. Bellamy and Monty are both written using the word “we” to refer to the mount weather genocide, but Clarke? It’s “I” and “me” every time. It’s as if she truely believes she’s the only one suffering from it, she’s bearing it so they don’t have to, except that isn’t true at all and that fact is so painfully clear. Later she tells him she knew she could leave because the people had him, but who did Bellamy have? He dealt with that weight and that grief alone because the only other person who could possibly understand, the one who pulled the lever with him, ran away. After she had convinced him not to in season one. She then comes back informing him she’d been acting on behalf of her people in Polis, without the people’s own knowledge or consent, but i digress, and he’d just ruined everything. So much for co-leaders. And he blows up at her, and we see how badly this action hurt him.

- In season five she leaves him to die out of spite and took her daughter to the people he saved her from at the beginning of the season. It could’ve been avoided, but she decided to punish him. That’s all it was. Don’t give me none of that “I had to!!!” she screams in season six to mindspace!Octavia. Bellamy was forced into role of father at just 6 years old and has proved time and time again he was prepared to risk it all in order to protect his child, there was nobody more equipped to handle Madi than him and her yelling in his face that he couldn’t understand was perhaps the biggest betrayal of them all.

- In season five she tortured and almost murdered his entire family. After switching sides again at the end of the season, all this pain inflicted was meaningless. You can talk all you want at me about Clarke’s *reasons* but all she did was take the path of most destruction towards the same end-point. It was just unnecessary violence caused because she had this desperation to take the wheel.

- all of this works because the writing is always in Clarke’s favour. The show is framed in a way that makes Clarke sympathetic, emphasises how much causing others pain hurts her, and that means that she’s never held to any of these actions, she might get a stern talking to but she’s forgiven insanely easily and allowed to go on with no actual change.

Pr//ncess M//chanic

Unfortunately, from what i’ve gathered, there’s a lot of racism in this one just as there is in Be//arke. I mean the entire nature of the relationship relies on the elevation of Clarke and the narrative power to demote Raven to ‘second best’ and prop over and over again. Raven, a girl who works her ass off to make most of the victories in the show possible, actually spoke the words “she saved us again” after launching a pod from an exploding planet into space and fixing the ark while space walking. It’s mindblowing. Raven’s (and others’) successes are handed to Clarke on a silver platter and we’re just meant to eat that up and blindly accept that Clarke is our one true saviour. I’m not going into this because it makes me feel sick and Raven deserved better.

Unrelated thoughts:

I don’t see their relationship as friendly at all post-season two. I got the impression Raven actually didn’t like Clarke, but it was all very complicated.

I also think it’s terribly convinient Raven never found out the true nature of Clarke’s relationship with Lexa because I don’t believe she would’ve ever been okay about Clarke again if she had (if the writers were going for realistic).

Madi/Clarke/Abby

Clarke strapped a torture device around her daughter’s neck for means of control and activated it under the guise of protection and that isn’t okay in any world or any context. Madi is a little girl who is dependant on Clarke and Clarke betrayed that trust. Those shock collars were used on her early in the season, she experienced the torture herself and still used it on her child. A lot of Clarke’s more unfavourable and/or unhealthy behaviours and characteristic are also present in Abby, which leads me to believe those are a product of her upbringing. Like mother like daughter, Abby also electrocuted Raven. Abby and Clarke have this strange rival-like relationship and I find it particularly cold, maybe because they’re so similar.

Abby and Raven

Abby has physically harmed Raven more than once. Out of anger and spite, or out of desperation. People hurting each other on this show is pretty standard and while this isn’t as overwhelming a mistreatment compared to others, her hitting Raven while she was acting chancellor was a pretty gross abuse of power. Its a visual display, with Abby’s imposing figure looming over a sitting and emotionally vulnerable Raven. We’re supposed to view this, i think, as mother-daughter. Abby says very early season one that Raven reminds her of Clarke, but she’s never shown treating Clarke in the way she does Raven. I liked the relationship during season one. From then and with Abby’s slow descent into villainy, not so much.

Ontari and Murphy

*She raped him. Next.

Cl//phy

Clarke is a cause/reason, whether direct or indirect, of a huge chunk of Murphy’s suffering, all of which she’s never been held accountable for due to Murphy’s position as undesirable. I, along with Murphy, had to be told she cares about him in season six because her otherwise complete disregard for his life has been pretty apparent.

Notable mention:

Chaining up him and Emori like dogs and promising to sacrifice the woman he loves, against her will, for the greater good after he saved her life. He has to beg her, plead with her and her almighty god complex, and it’s all quite uncomfortable and eery. (She later draws a picture of this event in her sketchbook which is…kinda weird.) And, in true Clarke fashion, she refuses to accept responsibility for this action and hides behind the same old trend of gaslighting and screaming “i had to!!!” I can’t root for a friendship between these two no matter how fun their back-and-forth can be. Especially since I can’t recall a single time they’ve shared a nice moment. Oh, and here’s a post about why Clarke and Murphy will never bond over isolation and survival.

*The clashing of Ontari and Murphy’s personalities was hilarious and I enjoyed watching them on screen together.

#the 100 #anticlarke #antibellarke #anti princess mechanic #anti bellarke #finally free of this question #the100meta #tw; child abuse #tw; rape #ro.answers

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ateezwriters · 5 years

Text

Part 1: Just Another Day in Crackhead Paradise (ateez beachy au)

Genre: Crack, humor, fluff, a lil spicy spice, mostly crack

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: just cussing and a lil spice (not much at all really)

Also the reader is gender neutral :)

Brought to you by Admin Venus and Admin Mars (yes the same admins from the main blog, we’re all keeping the same admin names) with some help from Admin Sun :) hope you enjoy or at least laugh a lil

-ok so

-your friend Yerin invites you to a weekend with some of her friends at a beach house

-can you guess who those friends are?

-wow y/n you're so smart

-it’s ateez

-so basically

-you and Yerin arrive at the beach house (more like mansion) in the morning and you’re more nervous than you’d like to admit

- “so how many people are going to be here?” you ask for the hundredth time while staring at the beach house (mansion) in amazement

- “um, about fifteen including you and i” Yerin answers with a bright smile, hooking her arm through yours to drag you up to the front door

-she rings the doorbell impatiently, bouncing slightly as the two of you notice a figure moving toward the door

-a tall guy with blonde hair opens the door, giving Yerin a warm smile before pulling her into a hug and exchanging pleasantries

-Yerin gestures to you and you bring yourself back to the conversation in time to introduce yourself politely, shaking his outstretched hand

-you learn his name is Yunho and you’re hoping that if you repeat his name enough in your head, then you’ll be able to memorize it before you meet the next person

-unfortunately, that’s not how it goes and you end up meeting the entire group at the same time because they were all gathered in the living room waiting for everyone to arrive to choose rooms

-and you two just so happened to be the last to arrive, perfect luck

-Yerin introduces you to everyone in a long line of faces and names that you don’t quite catch, though you recognize a few

-but when you reach the end you lock eyes with a smiling boy with dark hair

-your heart beats a little faster in your chest and you force yourself to smile so you don’t seem weird or impolite

-he introduces himself as Wooyoung and you make a mental note to prioritize his name in your memory

-so after meeting the guys, gals, and non-binary pals

-Yunho offers the idea to spend the day at the beach behind the house

-for the next couple of hours, everyone is having a grand-ol’ time

-you’re still kind of shy since you’ve only just met most of these people so you opt to observe more than take part in the crackheadery that these individuals are partaking in

-the girl in the yellow bathing suit (you think her name is Anna) jogs up to you and asks if you can take a group pic for her

-you, being the nice person you are, smile sweetly and take the camera from her, watching quietly as everyone squeezes together to fit in the frame

-anna jumps on her boyfriend Jongho’s back and throws up a peace sign while everyone else poses and smiles as you begin to take a variety of different pictures of them in different poses

-this wasn’t the first time you felt slightly left out, unfortunately

-when everyone starts to play chicken, partnering up quickly and teasing one another, you watched enviously, wishing for a second that you hadn’t accepted Yerin’s invitation

-speaking of Yerin, your disappointment doesn’t last for long as you watch your friend climb on the shoulders of the boy she’s been talking about lately, you’re pretty sure his name is Yeosang

-they’re up against Anna and Jongho and unfortunately, you know your friend is about to take a swim in the ocean because those two are no match for the younger couple

-you haven't known the other couple for long, but you can tell these two are unbeatable

-your prediction comes true as you watch Anna give Yerin a strong shove, successfully pushing her off the boy’s shoulders, sending them both falling into the water

-your eyebrows raise at the sight of the victorious couple, vowing not to mess with either of them (because that was quite the yeet if you do say so yourself)

-your amusement luckily continues into the next activity as a handful of people from the group decides to start a game of tag on the beach

-at first you were impressed at how serious everyone was taking the game and how fast they were managing to run on sand, like that’s a hard thing to do my guy

-but you are also incredibly scared that someone was going to eat shit and you might witness a hospital visit today, so you are covering your eyes every time you think it is going to happen

-and then it does, but not quite in a way you are expecting

-Yeosang reaches out to tag Yerin, but as he’s reaching his hand out to tap her, he manages to trip on the sand and fall forward, catching the back of her bikini top in the process

-your eyes widen as you watch the incident unfold

-as Yerin trips and falls onto the sand with her hands expertly holding her top to her body for dear life, Yeosang lands on top of her

-all while this is unfolding Jongho, manages to sneak away and grab the camera to record the fall for his and Anna’s youtube channel

-everyone is silent for a couple of seconds as they try to process what just happened

-then, laughter and wheezes fill the air as Yeosang scrambles off of Yerin while she tries to retie her top with one hand

-after that whole ordeal, everyone agrees that they should take a break and settle down into the sand

-a little while later, Anna again asks you again to take their pictures, but reassures you that if you’d rather relax, that's fine too

-and once again, being the sweet soul you are, you accept and begin taking pictures of yerin, anna, and another girl named sun-hee

-the three girls pose seductively as you snap each flattering angle, making sure they look good for Anna’s instagram

-the small voice in the back of your head keeps nagging

- “why are you hanging out with these people? Your looks literally cannot compare like at all. They’re all so gorgeous and you’re just...you”

-little do you know, a boy by the name of jung wooyoung has been noticing your small facial expressions and downcast looks

-after a day at the beach with your new friends, everyone heads back to shower and regroup for nightly festivities

-since everyone is tired from a day of running around doing stupid shit and having fun, it was a collective idea to relax and eat good food (with a little side of booze)

-there were 8 bedrooms in the house

-so there were two people per room (except for Yunho. He was rooming alone cuz his girlfriend couldn't make it to the mini vacay rip)

-you were chilling in the living room waiting for yerin to finish showering

-while you were waiting

-Yeosang knocks on the door to the room, asking for a towel

-no answer

-he opens the door slowly and is faced with Yerin’s ass on full display as she bends down to pick up her shirt

-aksjdldllajdjf he’s so embarrassed and blushy and splutters out some incoherent words as Yerin turns around

- “don't act like you haven't been staring at my ass the entire day. You're not slick boi I see you”

-Yeosang doesn’t know what to say as Yerin approaches him

- “and what if I say that’s not true”

-Yerin narrows her eyes at him, a small smirk forming. “Then we’d both know you’re lying and you’d be missing out on an opportunity.”

- “an opportunity?”

- “so if I kissed you right now, would you say no?”

- “no” he replies almost instantly, his cheeks reddening at the lightning-fast answer

-the way her smirk widens at his answer makes something in him lose control and he grabs her waist, pulling her to his body

-the feeling of her skin against his only serves to heighten the mood, sending his common sense spiraling down the drain as his lips move against Yerin’s fervently

-trails of fire run across his skin where her fingers brush and her lips touch, sending a chill down his spine

-he hums against her lips as she pulls his hair, sucking on his tongue

-he pulls away after a few more moments, attaching his lips to her neck and leaves light kisses down the side until he reaches the base of her throat, stopping to suck a dark hickey into the skin

-he repeats this action a few more times along her neck before she pulls him away to leave her own set of hickies along his skin

-while this is happening, you make your way upstairs to the room, assuming that Yerin is done bc she hasn't come down in a while

- “hey Yerin are you do-”

-your voice gets cut off as your eyes take in yeosang sucking Yerins face off

- “kdjfglsdhdljalka im so sorry I’ll leave omo-”

-you dash out and end up knocking on Anna’s and Jongho’s door to use their shower instead lol

-once everyone has finished showering and freshening up, you all gather into the living room

-San and Hyejin and Anna and Jongho are coupled up on the love seats and the other seats are occupied… except for the one right next to Wooyoung

-you make your way to sit next to the boi, not seeing how he blushes and scoots a lil bit to make more room for you

- “long day?” he asks you as you lean into the back of the couch, its large cushions almost swallow you

- “yeah, im not used to hanging out with so many people”

-you internally cringe at how much of a loner you sound

- “me neither. Its usually just me and the guys but since Jongho and Anna and Hyejin and San are dating, it makes sense for us to all hang out together” Wooyoung says smiling

-your heart beats a lil bit faster at his attempt to make you feel better uwu so cute

- “so what do you guys wanna do?” Sun-hee asks the group, sitting on the arm rest near Hongjoong

- “maybe we can have a night in? Like relax, eat, drink, enjoy the sunset? y/n seems kinda tired so we should have a chill night”

-you blush at the sound of Wooyoung taking your tired state into consideration

-everyone seems to be kind of worn out so they all agree

- in the next couple of minutes, pairs are designated for each role: buying booze, cleaning up the deck, buying snacks, buying and setting up stuff for a bonfire, making a playlist, cleaning the living room and doing laundry, and setting up the bar

-just as Yerin is about to ask you to stay at the house to clean up, she sees Wooyoung standing behind you, making a neck slicing motion toward her, unbeknownst to you

- “i wanna partner with her1!11!” he mouths to Yerin

-she secretly puts her hands up to surrender while you look away, talking to Joonhee

- “actually, i might pair up with Yeosang. Why don’t you and Wooyoung go... get snacks or something”

-you turn back to Yerin, eyes wide

- “are you up for it?” Wooyoung comes to stand next to you

-you nod, scared your voice would betray you, not being able to function with him standing so close to you

- “alright people, let’s meet back here in 2 hours. Don't do stupid stuff or get arrested. Jongho, don’t let Anna let weird people into the house- don't give me that look young lady. No one knows what you may do. You literally strike conversations with strangers” Seonghwa gives the youngest a stern look

-and with that, the second part of the day is underway

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damn-stark · 5 years

Text

Dark Hope ch.6

A/N- it’s a long one im sorry! But I really enjoyed writing this chapter so I hope you guys like it!

Warning- violence and talking about phyiscal abuse

Pairing- Kylo Ren x reader

Tagged- @angelmarie823

(Let me know if you want to be tagged)

It was a cold and dark you could feel fear and anger but you also felt power. A lot of power. It felt tempting to go towards it. But on the other side it was bright you could feel peaceful, calm but the power you felt was in the way of the dark and not the light. You did what you thought was right and went towards the light even if you could feel the darkness call to you. A voice you recoginzed was calling you towards that side.

“Y/N” the voice sounded deep like that of a man’s. You recognized the voice and you tried to place a face to the voice put you couldn’t it came out blank. “Y/N” the voice called out again. You looked towards the light and the dark . The light side didn’t call to you like the dark side did. You kept ignoring the voice but it was tempting your legs wanted to move that way but you couldn’t you wouldn’t.

When you got close to the light side you could see glimpses of something. Like a vision. But none of it scared you. You saw someone hold a purple lightsaber. It was a man and he looked like a Jedi. But the vision of him quickly vanished as you tried to touch it. You saw another man and yourself. Their was a smile on both of your faces. But once again it was gone. You felt warm and happy and calm but the other side still called to you. The voice is more demanding and the need to recognize it was killing you.

“Hey little star.” You heard the voice say. You instantly recognized it. Your eyes got watery and your lips parted to say something but you couldn’t say it. Your fingers inches from the light vanished. You were now moving towards the dark.

“Dad?” You felt yourself running towards the dark side. When you reached it he was gone. You were some place else. Some place you didn’t recognize. It was cold and wet from the rain. You looked around and didn’t see anything. Your clothes were soaked from the pouring rain. You heard something and your head snapped towards the sound. It was a red lightsaber. Their was a lot of people with their faces covered all holding a weapon. But the one that was holding the red lightsaber was in the middle in front of all the covered faces. He had a helmet on and he seemed to be looking at you. The sight of all them should’ve scared you but it didn’t. He extended his hand out for you to grab it but as you were about too it disappeared.

The rain was gone now but you could still feel everything else. But what most called out to you was the power. You now saw a hooded figure not like the man with violet lightsaber this one was different. His hood was black unlike the Jedis who’s was tan.You could feel fear but as you wanted to look more of this hooded figure it was gone and then you saw your dad.

“Hey little star.... I’m going away okay? Just for a little I’m coming back though okay?” He said and you saw your past self. So little with no scars or marking on your arm that you had now. You looked at your arm and your fingers ghosted over the black markings. Like lines from a circuit board. It helped the people that had you as a slave identify where you were best at. You sighed at painful memories and looked back at your young self. Tears in your eyes crying for someone who left you to fend for yourself. Who let you be a slave. You closed your eyes for a brief moment and when you opened them again you saw your father in front of you.

His eyes were glossy. He had his hand on your shoulder and he kissed your cheek. You looked down at the ground not wanting to see him.

“Okay I’m leaving now. I’ll be back okay?” He said again. You nodded and finally looked up at him. His brown eyes watery now. He moved and had a sad look on his dark complexion. He moved to his ship and as he was closing the door you ran towards him.

“No! Please don’t leave me! Please! Dad! No!” You ran towards him but he was gone. You felt yourself being pulled back. And now everything was different. You were where you hated most. The place you were alone in where you suffered so much. A women came with a whip that had electricity all around it and as it hit you again and again you screamed and saw flashes of everything. Of your past and new things. They all felt painful and alone except for one. A flash of a man the same man with the red lightsaber. That vision felt warm but it was gone and you felt pain again.

You screamed at the top of your lungs until you were shaken awake. In an instant you jumped up covered in sweat. You were shaking and Breathing heavy. You felt arms on your shoulders and you gasped and flinched in response. You looked over and saw a worried Han.

“Hey kid you okay? It was dreams okay? Look I’m real. You’re alright.” Han said as he wrapped you into a comforting hug.

“Please don’t leave me alone please.” You whispered your voice hoarse from screaming with tears going down your cheeks.

“I won’t. I’m right here I’m not leaving you alone.”

You storm your way through the first order base trying to go after Kylo Ren. Letting the anger within you control you not letting you think clearly. Kylo Ren sends storm troopers after you to stop you but you slice through them easily. The sight of Han dying flashes through your head making it the only thing you can think of and only causing you to get angrier.

A group of storm troopers surrounds you with their blasters aiming at you. You can see some of them shaking scared of what you have done to their peers. You raise your saber and look around at all of them. You smirk and put your saber down on the ground. You raise your hands up and kneel down as if you were about to surrender. You look around at all of them and you lower your head and look at the ground your smirk not disappearing. You finally snap your head back up and you put your hand out and all the storm troopers start floating up. They’re confused at first and start shooting at you but you stop their blasts midway. The blast are in a circle making it a beautiful sight really. All the red around you.

The stormtroopers trying to struggle to be let go but you make it hard for them to move. You then close your first and they are gasping for air, you move your fist slightly to the side and all their necks snap and you drop them to the ground. You bring your saber to your hand and then pick your self up to your feet. You send the blast that are still frozen around you the opposite way and they crash into the walls. You then start going after Kylo Ren again.

When you make it outside it’s snowing and cold. It’s hard to see in the darkness but the only thing you see is a red saber. You turn on your purple double sided saber and he turns around. You glare at him as you bring your saber over head and do twirl it in your fingers while doing so.

“You’re going to regret what you did.” You spat at him. He stays quiet and brings his hand up to you.

“You’re untrained you’ll never beat me.” He says in return. You scoff and slowly walk towards him.

“We’ll see about that.” You say with a scowl. You swing at him but he stops you and makes you go up. Your feet swing midair and you put your hand out but he stops all your movements making you fly back and hit a wall and then everything goes black.

“Noooo!!” You scream awake. You lift your head and feel a pounding headache coming from the back of your head. You’re a little a dazed but that doesn’t stop you. You stand up and you you wobble a bit as you do but you keep moving. It’s only colder causing you to shiver. You keep walking with no direction really but you just walk where you feel is right. You hear distant sounds of sabers crashing into one another and you quicken your step to get their faster. When you get to the location where you kept hearing the lightsabers you see Finn fall to the ground. You hear him say your name before he falls.

Kylo Ren stands apart from Finn as he sees you go down to check on him. When you feel him breath you sigh in relief. You press a light kiss on his head and stand up again. In the distance you see Rey on the ground too. You know she’s alive. They’re both alive. You look over at Kylo Ren and he looks at you. You see the same brown eyes as his dad’s. His seem softer and seem sad even if his face says something different. Eyes never lie. He seems to be reaching for something. You look towards the direction his hand is reaching for and see a lightsaber on the ground. It’s halfway to his hand but you stop it and you’re both fighting for it but you win and send it flying some place else.

“I’m back you thought you took me down but you didn’t.” You spat at him your voice full of posion as you feel the rage within you. You get your lightsaber out and turn it on. The purple blades making whiz sound as they come out. He does the same thing with his saber. “How could you kill your own father?” You shout to him as you take a step closer to him.

“It was necessary I had to do it.” He says as he takes a step himself. “But look at you. You’re so consumed by your own rage that you don’t see the bigger picture.” He says as he brings his saber up.

“And what is that? That I shouldn’t kill you? Because I am.” You bring your own saber up making the purple color from your saber brighten your facial features. And brightening your scowl.

“That you’re untrained and that you can lose yourself if not trained. That anger can consume you completely. You need me. I can train you. let me.” He says to you but you only roll your eyes and scoff.

“You killed Han and are trying to kill my friends why would I let you do that? You’re the thing I’m promising to destroy.” You take a step closer and so does he.

“You have untamed power but with me you can be more powerful than you already are. With me, you can tap into that power you don’t know you have.” He says making every word tempting but you can’t let yourself you won’t let yourself.

“Why? Why do you want me? Rey. She’s powerful I can feel it.” You say sounding almost sad but it quickly disappears.

“Because I see something in you. Something I can’t define but I see something.” He says and your face softens at what he says and you remember glimpses of what you’ve dreamed of so many times. And it’s him he’s the man you see in both sides.

“no no no he killed han. He killed han he’s trying to trick you.” You say to yourself. That makes you come back from what ever you were feeling. You swallow hard and the scowl returns. “No.”

“Fine. Let it be that way but you won’t be able to beat me.”

You both bring your sabers up and swing them at eachother causing them to clash into one another. As the purple and red clash into one another they make a magenta color. You both are trying to push one another as the sabers are clashed into one another, you plant your heels but he’s stronger than you so he pushes you back. You then you use the force and push him back. He falls to the ground but jumps back to his feet immediately. He goes to you and swings his saber at you but you swing back and avoid the swing. The red illumaniates your face making Kylo admire the way your eyes stand out by the light but pushes that feeling down.

You swing back up and swing your saber and it hits him on the shoulder. As he moves back it only makes your saber hurt him more and the scratch trail down to his chest. You kick him back and he grunts in pain. He swings at you again but your saber clashes into his again and again. Neither of you getting a hit.

“You killed your own father! He loved you and you killed him!” You yell at him. He doesn’t say anything but try to swing at you but you avoid his swing. You’ve finally had enough of neither you beating one another so you take your double bladed saber apart and it turns into a twin lightsabers. You twirl them around your fingers and get them into a fighting position.

You jump and swing at him but he sends you back hitting the ground into the snow. You pick yourself and go towards him and you swing at him with one saber but he swings back and they clash together. You smirk at him and he looks at you confused until you bring your other saber up and trap his saber in between the both of yours. You turn your hands to the side making his do the same. He tries to get saber free but as he’s about to turn it off you disarm him and throw his saber aside. He looks at it and then at you with a surprised expression on his face. You connect your sabers back and he’s reaching for his saber but you send him back making him hit a tree. You stop him from moving and have your saber inches from his neck.

You don’t say anything but look at him with the same scowl. “You said I wouldn’t beat you and yet here I am. An untrained girl.” He just looks into your eyes and you look away.

“I can see it you know. Your anger but yet you don’t want to kill me. You try to repeat Hans death in your head. You trying to blame me.But yet you can’t kill me.” He tells you. You look at the ground trying to deny the truth he says. You shake your head and bring the saber closer to his neck making him feel the heat. You see what he does to Han and you try to repeat the scene in your head. “But go ahead do it! kill me! Let the anger consume you and turn into the thing you’re trying to avoid.”

“Shut up!” You yell and you see it in his eyes the fear. You use the force and see what he feels. It was mistake on your part because your eyes soften and your shoulders drop. Your eyes get watery and you meet his gaze. The purple saber illumanites his features. But his eyes stand out to you the most. You both remain quiet. You two looking at one another. Something in the both of you clicks.

“Do it y/n!” You hear Rey shout. You snap your head her way and as you do Kylo catches you off guard and sends you back hitting the tree hard. Everything goes black once again.

Your eyes flutter open and your eyesight is blurry. You feel yourself moving but you’re not the one moving. You look up and see him.

“Ben?” You whisper. He looks at you and he seems suprised by the way you said his name. “Ben?” You whisper again but you go unconscious again.

22 notes · View notes

chnsfairy · 5 years

Text

even a shadow needs light to exist | bang chan

words ; 7,870

genre ; angst, and just kinda sad sorry

warnings ; language, um sad

a/n ; look this is my first long fic and i worked hard on it, i get its not the best out there and stuff but im kinda proud of it so thanks for reading if you do and sorry in advance,,, also hopefully this will show up in the tags this time yay

It’s like a memory.

Yet, it’s something completely different, because they don’t exist anymore, he doesn’t exist anymore, and the universe seems to want to torture you with that fact. The world’s funny like that isn’t it.

You catch glimpses of him periodically; sometimes as you pass by his studio, untouched as you’re too scared to set foot in it again, where you sometimes see him working at his computer. Always creating music he was, music in which the world will never be able to hear, music that once graced your ears and lulled you sleep throughout the painful nights. However, since then, you couldn’t bring yourself to listen to it nor anything else he’s made. It’s still too raw. Still too painful, the wound still fresh in your mind and in your heart.

But it’s not his fault, it’s not his fault the universe bestowed this ‘gift’ upon you. One that ends up causing so much pain on a daily basis. One where you could be simply eating breakfast or watching television, the times where you were almost at peace with the world, and seconds later he would walk out of what used to be your shared bedroom; curly hair atop his beautiful bare face and adorable dimples that made you want to cry at the sight of them and at the sight of him. Different memories would flood through your mind, you would remember his scent and his warmth when you would wake up in the mornings. How he would cling onto you with his arms until you would force him to get out of bed, and as soon as you found your way to the kitchen he would always return to his position by resting his chin on your shoulder as he wrapped his arms around your stomach. You would remember the late night kisses always full of love and compassion as you sat with him listening to music, talking about everything you could think of and sometimes nothing. You would just sit with each other and enjoy the company, the presence of one another was enough for you.

Sometimes you would cry, and sometimes you would squeeze your eyes shut in hope he’ll be gone by the time you open your eyes. He’s not there. That’s not him. It’s a curse you often think, but maybe it’s a blessing, or maybe it’s some cruel trick the universe wanted to play on you.

You thought you would’ve been used to it at this point, this occurring many times in the past and especially during your younger years. Nightmares. Your parents would classify them as.

Your head is playing tricks on you.

You just imagined it.

Scary daydreams, don’t worry.

Sure, maybe it was, but the seconds and blips you continue to see of people who shouldn’t be able to walk the earth anymore on a daily basis only made you worry and more anxious as time went by. Friends were starting to feel concerned as you jumped at the smallest things and freaked out about, well, nothing. It was impossible for them to see. How do you tell a person these things? How do you make them believe you? Truth is: you can’t. So, you don’t. You haven’t, and you suffer on your own.

So here you are, sitting in the corner of a small cafe, eating a warm muffin as you attempt to focus on your work. Trying to keep your mind busy, trying to think of anything but him and the others you see around. But it’s hard as the bustle of the small shop continues to drag your mind to different places, allowing your eyes to skim off your laptop and across the sea of strangers. Although, some really aren’t strangers at this point. You’ve been visiting the coffee shop more than you ever have in the past, it’s become an escape from your apartment and nowadays you feel it’s better to be anywhere but there. Sure, it can be loud, especially in the mornings where the rushing college students and workers attempt to wake themselves up from the dead feeling of sleep. Yet that loudness is almost soothing, it’s nice to see people being able to get up in the morning with a purpose and goal. You, unfortunately, lost that some time ago; and sometimes you envy those who haven’t.

As the days go by, you’ve continuously recognized these strangers that aren’t, exactly, strangers anymore. For example, there’s always this small group of teenagers that pour into the shop on Fridays, they laugh and talk the day away until one of them has to leave; causing a chain reaction after that as they head home. There’s also a couple that sometimes comes in around lunchtime, they usually order the same thing before leaving after a couple hours. You’ve noticed things over the past couple weeks that probably only a barista who works here would notice, you’ve seen the different groups and types of people come in and out of the cafe. Day in and day out, people have routines, people have lives, and you’ve come to recognize more and more of them. There are then the ones who, well, shouldn’t be here. At least you shouldn’t be able to see them. The small blips they have as they fracture in and out of existence in front of your eyes and your eyes alone. One being an elderly lady with her silver hair up in a tight bun, wearing a floral patterned dress and sandals, sometimes you see her walking her dog down the street and other times she’s sitting peacefully by the window staring off into space. Those are some of the less painful ones, other times you catch a glance of this little boy, no older than five, in a school uniform sitting on a bench outside. He always looks like he’s waiting for something, someone, and unfortunately that person probably never ended up arriving.

Throughout all that time you’ve also grown accustomed to the barista that always seems to be working when you arrive. “Han Jisung”, you read aloud his name tag during your first visit.

“Yep! And your name…?” He had asked motioning to the pen and cup he held in his hand.

“Oh um, it’s y/n,” The lack of social contact you’ve had over the past couple weeks, as well as the just excruciating pain you’ve got through, has lowered some built up confidence and self-esteem. “Sorry” you had then muttered as you fumbled through your mess of a bag, takeout receipts littering the bottom as well as an almost empty chapstick tube and a couple coins. You pulled out your wallet before handing over the amount due to the man in front of you, who gave you a bright smile as he handed you your change. On a cloudy day, one might mistake him for the sun if it wasn’t for his work attire, his fluffy grey-slightly blonde hair and plump cheeks just made him shine even more compared to everyone else in the shop.

Since that time he’s almost always working the register when you arrive at the cafe, smiling and talking with customers, cracking jokes here and there; just being a delight. It wouldn’t be completely wrong to say that at this point in your life you were the complete opposite of him, as you’ve attempted to hide from the world for the time being. Having as little social interactions as possible, the only ones being with the delivery man and well, Jisung. You weren’t expecting nor planning to make a friend anytime soon but I guess the stars aligned and it was just a perfect moment for not only you but him as well.

Jisung was in his third year of college, where he was studying to get his degree in music. He’s always been in love with the beautiful sounds people call music that he’s heard since he was a child, so when he got older he started creating himself. Jisung wanted to show the world his music and meaningful lyrics to anyone he could, he would find himself lost in his computer late at night not bothering to watch the clock tick past three am. Nowadays though, he never seems to be anywhere but class, the cafe where he works or locked up in his dorm/studio working on something. He’s rarely out anymore and his friends often go weeks without seeing him, and at this point, they’ve deemed this type of lifestyle completely unhealthy. They’ve tried to get him out of this funk he’s in, inviting him to parties and movies, but nothing seems to work anymore. So at some point, they just kinda stopped, but that’s ok; Jisung rathers it to be this way.

Neither of you are exactly sure when this weird friendship started if that’s even a way to classify it, as he just feeds you coffee and sweets and you simply keep him company when things get slow. Maybe it started the first day you stopped by when you made some witty remark and had Jisung laughing for a good five minutes, or maybe it was when he decided to stop by your table to ask what you were doing.

“Trying not to focus on too many things,” you said before turning back to your laptop and murmuring “or people.”

“Well that’s probably hard in a noisy place like this,” Jisung replied, it had been just two weeks of your visiting this small cafe that he worked at and you always piqued his interest. You always looked on edge, as if you were avoiding something, possibly someone; and it never seemed like you had anywhere else to go. It was like you were always here, were you hiding from something? He constantly asked himself these questions as the days went by and you continued to sit in your little corner of the world. Sure he’s had regular customers before but that was different, they’d come in, order and then head off to school or work. The regular evening crowd would be mainly college students trying to get homework done somewhere other than their dorm. But you, you never left, well that might be exaggerating it a bit but you really were constantly there. Not that he didn’t mind, it just…worried him a little. So that’s why one day two weeks after your first showing he decided to make conversation, not only did it seem like you needed it but he did too.

“Want some company?” He asked, slowly sliding into the seat across from you, your gaze never left his face as you sat there puzzled, you were just kind of confused about this whole situation. Doesn’t mean sitting in a corner mean you want to hide from everyone? Doesn’t it just shout ‘go away’? Clearly not anymore, and this man is proving that to you more and more every day.

“Um, aren’t you supposed to be working?” You asked carefully, you found yourself irritated and slightly intimidated by this sunshine in front of you. It’s been a while since you’ve made any decent conversation but you guess it’s better than thinking about him, or continuously staring at what seems like nothing to the naked eye.

“I’m on a break right now,” Jisung stated a matter of factly before checking his watch, “and I’ve got five minutes.”

“And you came over here because…?” You asked him, still confused but distracted from most things nonetheless so it wasn’t a total loss talking to him.

“Because you seem like you need a friend, and… well, I wanted to ask why you’re always here,” he looked up to see your face in a slight frown before shaking his head to rephrase his previous statement. “N-not that it’s a bad thing! It’s just unusual you know? I’ve come to recognize people who come and go a lot but no one just stays here throughout most of the day so I’m wondering if you’re ok…?”

“And what place are you in to be asking me that?” You argued, not feeling in the mood to talk with somebody, a complete stranger nonetheless, about your problems. “Well, clearly I’m in no position to tell you really anything but you seem like you’re not doing to well, and we’ve all been there.”

“Not here you haven’t.” You gritted through your teeth, at this point you just wanted this conversation to be over and done with, you were gaining nothing from it and you didn’t really feel like talking to anyone anyway. Your drink was cold at this point and it would be better to leave. And if someone had really noticed you after all this time maybe it would be best to find another place to spend your time.

“Ok, maybe not…but well-”

“Just what do you want?!” You screamed at him, the sudden outburst caused the few other customers in the cafe to look your way, Jisung gave them a smiled and waved them off in apology before turning back to you. He was unsure of what to say, maybe it was a mistake to come over here; he wasn’t too sure as to why he did it himself.

“I-I, um, w-well-”

You interrupted him before he could finish his thought.

“My best friend, the love of my life, is fucking dead and I’d rather not be at home, it doesn’t even feel like home anymore, ok?” You felt sick to your stomach, it was the first time those words fell out of your mouth, the first time you finally admitted it to yourself, and you felt yourself choke up from all the repressed emotion building up at once, and your eyes started to water slightly.

“It’s fucking torture so why don’t you mind your own business and get back to work, your break should be over right?” You were fuming, and you suddenly felt like running away from the whole world, what was the point without your other half? The person that kept you grounded, the one reason you had to keep living in this horrible world and he’s gone now. There was nothing you could do about it except watch his remains the universe left for you in blips of time, continuously fading in and out of existence. The exact same pain you’ve lived with your entire life but it was never this traumatic, the world is a tease, he’s right there and yet he’s never there at the same time. You’ve never felt the excruciating pain of losing someone so important and so close, and now that you have you don’t even know what to do with yourself.

What Jisung saw day after day as you locked yourself away by plugging your headphones in and typing furiously away at your computer, always just looking dead. There was no other way to describe it, sometimes you ate, sometimes you didn’t but you never looked fully alive. It was like you were only partially there, unbothered by the happenings around you as you sit there being…alive. It didn’t look like, nor did it feel like to you, living anymore; you felt so empty.

He himself knew what that felt like, it may not have been as horrible as the experience you’re going through but at one time or another, he’s known the feeling. So he saw someone in need, someone who needed a friend and maybe, just maybe, he needed one too.

So when saw you quickly shoving everything back in your bag he immediately felt horrible, he had poked around too much where it wasn’t his place to poke, he felt like he had to do something to make it up to you. Or apologize at least, he couldn’t leave feeling this guilty.

“No, please don’t go I’m sorry, you were right. It wasn’t my place to be asking you these questions,” He attempted to stop you but it was too late now, you wanted out of here and you were going to do anything to achieve that. “Um, this may be inappropriate at this point but I’m really sorry for your loss.” Jisung looked up at you as you swung your bag over your shoulder, tears were spilling out of your eyes at this point and he wasn’t exactly sure of what to do. Frantically he grabbed a napkin and awkwardly offered it to you, you ignored his gesture and shoved straight passed him and through the front doors, passed the fading elderly lady and down the block and the boy sitting on the bench. By now, Jisung couldn’t even run after you to apologize, his break was over and he was being motioned over back behind the counter. Full of regret, Jisung walked slowly towards the register and continued with his shift, he was slightly dazed from the previous conversation. It was unexpected, to say the least, he didn’t at all predict what you were going to say to be that dark and serious; and above everything else he was feeling he felt absolutely horrible, he upset you, a stranger nonetheless. You didn’t even know each other but he still felt like he owed you something for putting his nose your business like that, he just hoped that you would come back to give him that chance.

After four painful days locked up in your cold and empty apartment, you finally decided to take another visit to the cafe, in the moment all you had felt was anger but the guilt had been gnawing at your stomach ever since the conversation you had with Jisung. You felt absolutely horrible, you had no right to yell at him for that, he was just being kind. An incredibly kind soul he was, and you felt downright terrible for yelling at him like that. But you were too scared to confront him about it, you were never good with talking to people anyway; he was always there to help you with that stuff. But now, you’ve got no one to offer you support, sometimes, it almost feels like you’ve been abandoned, and you know that’s not the case. You had no control over what happened, and with whatever the universe decided to give you, you may never come to terms with what happened if he always seems to be everywhere. Always appearing and disappearing throughout existence, at your worst it felt like he was haunting you, but without a present state of mind in him, that was clearly not the case.

When Jisung saw you enter the cafe he immediately felt better, it put a smile on his face to see you return. After day two he was worried he scared you away for good, he didn’t want to go throughout his day knowing he’s the reason for your never returning. Similar to you, he felt completely guilty for what he said and wanted to do something to make it up to you. So he quickly stood up from his stool and watched you shyly walk over to the counter, scratching the back of your neck as you contemplated on what to say.

“I should apologi-”

“I’m really sorry!”

Jisung was shocked by your sudden burst, he thought you were just going to completely ignore him and return to your corner once again. Instead, you’re apologizing to him? Before he even got a chance? He’s the one at fault right? He stood there staring at you dumbfounded for a couple seconds, the atmosphere had become awkward as he realized he hadn’t said anything in response. You were worried you did something wrong, maybe you should leave again, he doesn’t care about you - he barely knows you.

“W-why are you apologizing to me? It’s supposed to be the other way around!”

Fumbling around with the smooth leather bracelet around your wrist you slowly looked up at Jisung who had a confused look planted across his face.

“Because well, because you didn’t deserve me being so rude to you, your heart was in the right place, and I...I was just being a dick.”

“I-I, um, sorry I don’t really know what to say now, initially I was going to apologize but it just feels weird now,” Jisung still felt as terrible as ever, here you were, looking almost scared as you stood in front of him; fidgeting with your fingers you stayed silent. “But I’m still sorry, so I hope you can forgive me for being a bit nosy.”

“You know what, fuck this let’s start over,” You said before sticking your hand out, “So my name is y/n, my life is pretty fucked up right now and I’m not in the best place and I choose to be here rather than my apartment, and...yeah...that’s about it.”

Jisung took your hand and gave you a small smile, “Well then it’s nice to properly meet you, let’s hope I don’t mess up this time around, yeah?”

Two weeks ago you would’ve hit yourself for letting another person in your life, in the end, it only causes you pain so what’s the point anymore? You weren’t necessarily planning on making any friends anytime soon, and you would’ve been a burden to them in this state anyway. But then Jisung popped into your life, and he was suddenly a friendly face in a crowd of strangers. Sure, the first interaction between the two of you was a bit off-putting and unexpecting for anything else to happen after that, to say the least. But after a while to two continued to make small conversation as your time spent in the cafe grew longer, and especially as the weather got colder.

The small coffee shop turned into a more welcoming space than your apartment had been in weeks, the familiar smell of espresso beans, spices and pastries became something of a calming scent. The barrier you’ve placed around you breaks apart slowly when you enter, it’s like you feel safer? If that’s even a way to put it. Sometimes though, you feel absolutely horrible thinking all these things, without your other half next to you you’re not sure if it’s right anymore. You’re not sure if you’re ever going to be able to move on from what happened; especially if it, no he, continues to just somehow exist. It’s not fair. Why does the world seem to want to do this to you? Haven’t you gone through enough already?

Pushing your thoughts aside you attempt to focus on the moment now, where you find yourself sitting on a stool behind the counter. You’re not exactly sure how you ended up back here, you guess Jisung convinced you it would be fine and that his boss was pretty laid back so you wouldn’t get in trouble. Although his coworker, Hyunjin, thought otherwise. Hyunjin was usually making the drinks with all the fancy machines behind Jisung, instead of working the register, so the two of you had only exchanged very few words over the past couple weeks. But you had become familiar with blonde, you learned that he was a dance major at the same college Jisung was attending, and that he was surprisingly very clingy to his friend.

“Jisungie~ y/n’s taking you away from meee.” He whined one day, you had been sitting in the back behind the counter reading a book you had brought in that day. Minding your own business and chatting with Jisung about his school work from time to time, and clearly, Hyunjin hadn’t been getting the attention that he wanted.

“Jinnie, we’re friends leave y/n be.” Jisung laughed as Hyunjin clung onto his back, luckily there were no customers that needed to be tended to at the time so the two had some time to goof off.

It was nice to have these lights in your life, until now, it felt like a never-ending black hole. You never seemed to feel at peace with anything anymore and nothing brought you happiness, at least now, a rare smile can be seen forming across your lips. As time went by and the more you grew to know Jisung the more he reminded you of, well, him. His love and adoration for music alone was enough, and sometimes you would catch him writing lyrics in a small notebook during his break, reminding you of the small book of never seen before lyrics lies untouched in your apartment. You had planned on reading through it, but maybe it was still too soon to go do that. So you ended up setting it aside for another time.

The first time Jisung showed you a song he was working on you burst into tears in the middle of the cafe, luckily it was basically empty so you didn’t draw much attention to yourself. You were surprised nonetheless, confused as to why it’s bringing you to tears maybe it reminded you of the past too much. How you would always get demos of new songs before anyone else got a chance to listen to them, you always treasured those moments and it felt weird, almost wrong, spending them with someone else.

“y-y/n, um, what’s wrong? Are you ok? Did I do something?” Jisung had already made you angry once and now that he was the cause of your sudden sadness he wasn’t sure what he should do. Immediately closing his laptop he pulled you towards him and wrapped his arms around you, you just stood there stiffly as tears still pooled out of your eyes.

“Look, I’m sorry about...that...whatever that was, I feel really bad but I hope you know that you can talk to me about things if you want,” Neither of you had moved, your arms stayed frozen and your sides as his squeezed you even tighter. “Look we may not have known each other for very long but you’re really interesting and fun to talk and hang out with. I would love to help you get through whatever is going on in your life, but you can’t keep building all that pent up emotion inside of you, it’s not healthy.”

“You won’t believe me even if I tell you.” You whispered, there’s only one other person who knew about the things you’ve seen, but he’s gone now and there’s no one else to help you go through that anymore. You’ve thought about telling Jisung, out of everyone you’d assume he would understand you the most. Maybe even believe you, unlike your family and old friends you laughed at you when you told them.

“Well, we won’t know that until you explain it, now will we?” Jisung finally let you of you, still standing right in front of you he turned to check the clock. “How about this: after my shift is over I’ll walk you home, you can choose to talk or not to talk, whatever you want. But I’ll listen the entire time and only talk when you’re done, ok?”

Without saying anything you nodded your head and sat back down, pulling out your book once again as Jisung went to go help a customer. Although you were staring at these words on the pages of this book you found yourself not reading them, you continued thinking about what you were going to say to him if you found the confidence in yourself to even explain these things. You lost faith in most of humanity some time ago, and you’ve always had very few friends, but there was only one that completely understood you and believed everything you told him. So it’s been a while since you’ve trusted someone and much as you did him, but Jisungs been nothing but kind to you. So maybe, just maybe, you’ve found someone who won’t go running for the hills when he finds out about these weird things you see daily. You hope at least.

It was already 6:30 before you knew it, night time was creeping over the buildings outside as it engulfed the entire city in darkness. The evening crew was filing in through the back, getting ready to take over the other two’s jobs as they prepared to head home. You stood by the front doors as Jisung grabbed the rest of his stuff from a locker in the very back on the shop, still going over in your head what you should even say to him.

“Ready?” You looked up to see Jisung already holding the door open, motioning you to step out into the cold February air. You nodded your head before walking outside and to the left, it was only a ten-minute walk from here back to your apartment and you didn’t feel like being out in the cold for very long.

The two of you walked side by side for a couple minutes in silence before you finally pulled up the courage to start this dreaded conversation. Still, as anxious as ever, you took a deep breath before you started to speak.

“As you know, um, m-my best friend, my rock, my e-everything,” You already felt tears starting to well up in your eyes, after a couple seconds you felt a warm hand grip onto yours. Looking up, you saw Jisung give you a small smile on encouragement to keep talking, giving your hand a quick squeeze.

“He died.” You’re breath hitched as a single tear fell down your cheek, and you watched as the cold air turned your breath into steam in front of you, still trying your best to remain calm.

“It was painful to find him, you know? Heart attack, they told me after the paramedics came. It was apparently too late to do anything about it at that point too,” a sad smile found itself on your face as you thought back to that day. “You remind me of him a lot, you should know, and maybe that’s why I find myself trusting you.” Jisung nodded his head, staying silent just as he promised.

“Now this next part you’re not going to believe me, I’m telling you that now,” You took another right as you crossed the empty street, only hearing a single car in the distance of this quiet neighborhood you live in.

“Do you believe in the supernatural?” You asked Jisung, looking at him in hopes of some sort of positive response.

“It depends,” he said. “Should I?”

A small chuckle escaped your soon to be frozen lips, shaking your head a little you look up at the night sky.

“You know, nowadays, when I lift my head up I can’t see any stars,” The night was cloudy, and yet the brightness of the moon still shown through it all. “Jisung what do you think happens to the place where a person dies?”

Shrugging his shoulders, Jisung kept walking by your side, hanging onto every word you say.

“All that stuff where people say the final resting place is the grave is just a bunch of bullshit,” At this point, you weren’t shaking anymore and words were falling out of your mouth before you had a chance to stop them or even think. You weren’t sure where this sudden feeling of anger and annoyance came from, maybe you were just finally fed up with the world. “And I know, cause I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Everybody who’s died stays there, repeating things over and over again as they continuously fade throughout time and existence. They don’t leave no matter how much I hate it and I can’t communicate with them no matter how much I want to. My apartment is torturous now! He’s always there, with his stupid perfect face and stupid smile! And I can’t do shit about it!” You were yelling now, waving your hands about as fought the incoming tears that threatened to spill down your face.

“Hey, hey y/n, shhh calm down,” Jisung whispered as he held your arms down at your sides so you wouldn’t accidentally wack him in the face, your cheeks were now red from yelling and possibly from the cold. “Why don’t we get you home, yeah?”

“You don’t believe me.” You froze in your spot, you knew it, it was a stupid idea to tell him. You shouldn’t be able to trust anybody anymore.

“Now that’s not true at all, surprisingly, I do. But I feel like you should get home and eat something.” Jisung started guiding you down the street, slowly you nodded your head as you started to walk with him in silence.

“I’m never at peace anymore you know,” Your voice was so faint, any quieter and Jisung wouldn’t have been able to hear it. “It’s like I’m hiding from something that doesn’t exist.” Turning on his heel Jisung stood directly in front of you, he held onto your shoulders causing you to stop moving as you looked up at him.

“What?” You asked, slightly irritated.

“Visit his grave,” You looked at him with such a confused and pain filled look on your face. “Maybe going there will help you come to terms with what happened, ever thought of that?” You stared at your feet, slightly embarrassed and a bit annoyed. Of course you thought of going, why wouldn’t you? But he’s right, you never went. Because you didn’t want to face the truth quite yet, and if it weren’t for Jisung you might never have. You stayed silent and walked passed him, unsure of what to say you headed straight for the door of your apartment complex. But before you could get inside Jisung grabbed your arm and turned you around.

“What if I go with you?” He asked, hoping for a response but you instead stayed quiet, staring at your feet as you stood in the cold air. “Tomorrow I have off, I’ll be here to pick you up around ten-ish, ok?”

“Why are you doing this?” Jisung gave you a quick smile before taking a couple steps back down the street.

“Because I know that you deserve to be happier than you are now,” You almost ran after him but fought against it. “And I wanna do everything in my power to make that happen! Goodnight y/n!” Jisung then took off across the street and out of your sight, stunned, you stood outside in the cold for a couple more seconds. Replaying the previous conversation in your head. It was one of the first times that someone didn’t freak out or run away immediately when you told them about these people you still saw, and you were incredibly grateful for that.

Unlocking the door to your apartment you were welcomed by the familiar smell of him, and the always eerie silence without him there to engulf you in a hug for your return home. Luckily he was nowhere to be seen at this time so you walked over to your half empty fridge and opened it, there wasn’t much inside as you expected. Closing it and walking over to a cupboard you grabbed the last bag of chips you had and found yourself sitting on the couch staring out the window and up at the sky. Still nothing. Just the clouds in the moon, so turning to the TV you flipped through Netflix before deciding on some movie to watch in the meantime.

At some point, you’re not sure when you fell asleep on the couch with the movie still playing in the background. When you finally came to the clock read 10:47, there was no chance of you falling back asleep in your bed now. Suddenly, the sound of footsteps could be heard in the studio down the hallway, freezing in your place you tried not to look over, just focus on the TV, you thought to yourself.

“What have you done to me…” You asked yourself as you continued to stare at the television, although you weren’t actually paying attention to whatever was happening on the screen, your mind was occupied with other things at the moment. Mainly, fighting the urge to look down the hallway, even though you know what you’ll see you still can’t help yourself.

Fortunately, by the time you turn your head he’s already gone, disappearing again only you’ll know he’ll be back at some point or another. ‘Why not move?’ One might ask, but being a broke graduate who’s still trying to pay back student debts you can’t afford to move, and even if you could you’re unsure if you would even want to. You would end up leaving behind so many memories of this place, the smiles and laughter the two of you shared here over the years would belong to someone else, and you didn’t want to do that.

After a couple hours, you found yourself dragging your feet across the cold wooden floor and into your bedroom, with your bed still unmade from the previous night you stripped off your clothes from the day and into a comfortable t-shirt and pair of shorts before you finally climbed into bed and under the covers. Sleep wasn’t welcoming you quick enough and it let your mind wander for a while. You thought about how long it had been since you’ve had a friend like Jisung and how he was one of the kindest humans you’ve met in a while. Now the line between strangers and friends has definitely been crossed but you wouldn’t consider yourself that close to him, you have fun hanging out and all but you don’t think you’re ready to pour out all your fears and secrets to him yet. Which is quite hypocritical as you basically just emptied out your heart in front of him, he even walked you home so maybe you were closer to him than once anticipated. Whatever it was, you were glad to have somebody like him back in your life. Soon, sleep took over your body has the clock read 2:24, earlier than you had thought and earlier than most nights, you gratefully fell asleep in hope that the nightmares would leave you be tonight. You’ve had enough for once.

Coffee mug in hand, and a bouquet of flowers on your left, you sat on the stairs leading up to your apartment complex - it was a quarter after ten and you were worried Jisung forgot about you. Right as you were getting ready to turn around and go back inside a silver car pulled up on your block, and as the window rolled down you could see Jisung sitting in the inside - music blasting through the speakers. He was wearing a simple grey sweatshirt and a black jacket over it, his grey-blonde hair still messy from the previous night of sleep.

Jisung waved his hand before leaning over and opening the passenger side door, relief rushed through you as you walked over to the car and as climbed into the seat next to him. Jisung turned down the radio and turned to you as you buckled your seat belt and put down your coffee mug in a cup holder next to you.

“Sorry I was a bit late I was busy getting that,” Jisung laughed a little before he pointed to behind him in the back of the car, where around five more bouquets of flowers and a couple wreaths sat. “I couldn’t decide on what flowers to get so I just kinda asked them to choose and stuff so-”

“Jisung, y-you didn’t have to do that...you don’t even have to take me there yet here you are being the sweetest human being.” You sat there astounded at the array of flowers that lay behind you.

“Well, it feels right and I wanted to,” Jisung scratched the back of his neck before he faced the front once again and turned the music back up. “You ready?”

“Probably not.” Jisung shrugged and smiled at you.

“That’s ok, no one ever is, are they?”

Looking down at your lap where you placed your small bouquet you gave yourself a sad smile and Jisung started driving down the street - music playing in the background you whispered only loud enough for yourself to hear.

“No, I guess not.”

The graveyard is quiet on a Friday morning, in the distance you can see few families gathering together to honor their passed loved ones. Surprisingly you can also see those who have already passed, some stand next to their family as they smile at them, others seem to be wandering aimlessly through the grass and trees further away. You shook your head and attempted to pay them no mind, Jisung and you were a bit too busy carrying flowers to think of anything else at this moment anyway.

You passed multiple rows of graves before you found a spot that was even remotely familiar, at this point you felt your breath grow heavy and your legs started to feel like they were being weighed down by chains. Your arms dropped everything you were carrying without a care in the world as soon as your eyes landed on the tombstone, the truth is, you hadn’t seen it until this point. Now, you felt your knees buckle under you as you heard a worried Jisung cry out your name. But you were too busy focusing on what laid in front of you.

Here Lies

Christopher Bang

A beloved son, brother, friend and lover.

Soon the tears started to fall and they seemed to have no plan on stopping, burying your face in your hands, the sounds of what could only be sobbing erupted from your mouth. You really weren’t prepared to see this, it felt too real, maybe up until now everything felt a bit surreal. Maybe, given time, you could’ve convinced yourself that it was all a bad dream. But now, being here, it all came crashing down on you at once. He really is gone.

You felt the warm presence of Jisung sit down next to you, he placed his hand on your back and took your hand in his.

“I’m gonna go back and get some stuff from the car, who knows, maybe it’ll be good for you to sit here on your own for a bit,” You could hear Jisung stand back up and take a couple steps back, face still buried in your hands you hear the wind rustle the grass and trees around you. “I’ll be back in a bit.” Jisung’s footsteps grew faint as the seconds ticked by and as you finally looked back up at the tombstone in front of you.

“Well, it sure has been a while hasn’t it Chan…” The distant conversations people are having as well as the rare chirp from a nearby bird seem to be the only other noise you can hear other than yourself. Sitting cross-legged on the grass you found yourself playing with a small rose in your hands, unsure of what to do - or say.

“You know, I’m not sure if you would be disappointed or proud of me at this point. For starters I haven’t really done much at all since well, you know...but I did make a friend. Yeah I know, I’m surprised too. But he reminds me a lot of you, he’s like a younger version more or less. He makes music too, and it’s honestly really good, you two would hit it right off if you met. Maybe you could’ve made something together, I don’t know.” You found that the tears had slowed down now, a few droplets fell only every so often.

“I can imagine what you would be saying to me right now, ‘time goes, and we can’t change what happens’ probably something under those lines. But still, without you here I keep wondering if ‘should I just give up?’ Before I lost my mind, the one who stood in front of me was always you. You always held onto me and told me to hold on a little longer, these days, starting to feel better is my one wish, it’s what I’m thinking about mostly but I’m not sure on how to fulfill that without you.” You sniffed and looked up at the sky, reading the words over and over again became too painful to do anymore.

“Y-you know I always told you you were gonna make it one day but look where we are now, honestly I think it should’ve been me, not you. You still had so much to offer the world.”

“y/n don’t you ever talk about yourself like that,” Whipping your head around you saw that Jisung had now returned with a couple more wreaths and flowers to decorate with. “I’m pretty sure Chan would tell you the same thing.”

“I-” You started in protest.

“No don’t say anything, help me with these, yeah?” He motioned to the pile of bouquets the two of you had brought, slowly standing up and wiping your jeans you walked over and grabbed one of the small wreaths of flowers before placing it directly in the middle of the tombstone. Nodding your head in satisfaction you turn back around you help Jisung with the rest, placing them in different spots and you almost ended up covering the entire front. When looking from a distance it really stands out compared to everyone else, it was quite a display and you were pretty happy with it. Chan would’ve liked this. You thought before stepping back and admiring your ten minutes of work, a smile found itself plastered on your face as a few tears still dropped down your cold cheeks.

“You know,” Jisung started as he found a spot standing next to you. “Shadows need light to exist, so don’t worry, you’ll get through this.” A soft chuckle was heard from you as you nodded your head and wiped your face of any remaining tears.

“Chan would’ve said that too,” You took the small rose you had been holding and planted a small kiss on the top of it before settling it in front of the grave. “Always one with words he was.”

“You ready?” Taking a few steps back you turned to Jisung and nodded your head, slowly walking passed him and down the hill, pass the wanders and other families all the way back to the car - Jisung only a couple steps behind you.

“Thank you for this,” You said as you closed the door on your side of the car. “Really, it means a lot.” Jisung turned the keys and started the engine before smiling at you.

“Anytime, y/n.”

The car pulled out of the small parking lot and through the gates, you took one more look of the hill now behind you. A small gasp escaped your lips as you could see Chan sitting ever so calmly next to his grave, picking up the rose you left before looking back up at the sky. The wind running through his blonde curls as you could clearly see a content smile across his face. He looked happy.

“y/n, you ok?” Jisung asked, looking back one more time you could see that Chan had disappeared once again, the small red rose now flying in the wind.

“Oh yeah, everything will be just fine.”

#skz #stray kids #kpop #skz imagines #stray kids imagines #kpop imagines #skz scenarios #stray kids scenarios #chan #bang chan #han jisung #jisung #chan imagines #stray kids fluff #bang chan imagines #han jisung imagines #kpop scenarios #bang chan x reader #han jisung x reader

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keelywolfe · 5 years

Text

Fic: Hearts and Hopes

Summary: It's been a long week and Edge is tired. His husband still has a trick up his sleeve but that's okay, he keeps his heart on his sleeve, too. It's a fair trade.

Notes: If you thought to yourself that I couldn’t possibly get more fluffy with this, brace yourself.

Tags: Spicyhoney, Established relationship, Fluff, hurt/comfort

part of the ‘by any other name’ series.

Read it on AO3

Read it here!

~~*~~

The monitor screen was starting to blur in his vision and Edge rubbed at his sockets irritably, trying to focus. It was late enough in the day for it to be close to pointless and the stacks of folders at his elbow were a clear sign that he hadn’t gotten nearly enough done over the course of the day. Janice was sorely missed and as much as he wanted her to take her time recovering, he’d be relieved when she finally came back. Working without her was like trying to type with a hand tied behind his back, doable but slow going.

Edge sighed tiredly. He was being unreasonably annoyed with himself and he knew it. Along with missing his assistant, he hadn’t slept well, nightmares lurking in the corners of his sleep. Those dreams always came back when he was stressed. He hated that particular weakness, didn’t allow his nightmares to follow him into his waking hours but still, his sleep was interrupted, and it left him drained.

It was endlessly irritating that his subconscious mind refused to leave the past in the past. Underfell no longer had a hold on his daytime life, when would it leave his nights in peace? The probable answer to that was not one he particularly liked.

A knock on his door made him jerk and Edge swore under his breath. It was nearly time for him to go home, he wasn’t in the mood to deal with anyone else’s problems today and without Janice to run interference, he was going to have to put his own diplomacy to the test.

“Come in,” he called, trying to keep his irritation from his voice.

To his surprise, Stretch poked his head in the door, grinning cheekily. “heya handsome, you about done?”

Edge could only sigh in a mixture of fondness and exasperation. Days after Stretch had promised him to be careful coming down here, if he came down here, which he rarely did, of course that would be when he showed up at his door.

“okay, you can stop with the look,” Stretch chided. Not that there was a look, Edge was certain of that, but Stretch could always read him better than anyone. “i shortcutted into the lobby from the bus stop, as per. no one saw me outside. i even called reception before i did so no one would have a shitfit about me coming out of nowhere.”

“Thank you for your caution,” Edge said dryly, masking his relief that Stretch was at least taking him seriously. “Can I ask why you’re here when I would have been home shortly anyway?”

“you can ask and i’ll even answer,” Stretch grinned happily, rocking on his heels, and Edge waited, suspiciously. “i want you to drive me someplace.”

“That shouldn’t be a problem,” Edge gave him a narrow look. “Where am I driving you?”

Stretch’s grin turned sly and he tapped the faint protuberance of his nasal bone, “now, see, that’s where you’ll need to be patient, babe. you’ll see when we get there.”

For one moment, he considered begging off. Whatever game Stretch was playing was surely heartfelt, but he was tired and wasn’t really feeling up to a mysterious road trip. Janice was supposed to be back next week, and even so they’d be days catching up to the backlog of work.

Tempting, but to do so would steal that look of glee from Stretch, his visible delight in whatever it was he had planned. Stretch would accept it if he asked, Edge knew, he wouldn’t complain or protest, and whatever disappointment he felt would be held back, muted into nothing but dimmer eye lights, his normal exuberance only slightly subdued. Nothing that most people would notice.

But Edge would know.

“Let me pull the car up to the sidewalk,” Edge sighed. “You can see it from reception, and you can shortcut to it.”

“Whatever makes you happy,” Stretch said agreeably, bouncing on his toes as he waited for Edge to put on his coat.

You make me happy, Edge didn’t say, though he did reel Stretch in for a quick kiss, one that was happily given.

He did hope it wasn’t a long drive.

~~*~~

Stretch really hoped this wasn’t a mistake.

For one, he could tell Edge was tired. That was fucking disturbing as it was, Edge was usually a six-foot energizer bunny, his baby could go and go, and usually did. He wasn’t used to seeing lingering weariness in him, the way his eye lights were dimmer than normal.

Yeah, that and the nightmares he’d been having this week, thanks, if Edge thought he was hiding those, he was ever-fucking-wrong, and maybe he didn’t wake up screaming loud enough to peel the linoleum but even still, he wasn’t sleeping well.

Tempting as it was to play the hypocrite card and point out that he’d gotten dragged to a therapist when his nightmares were bad, eh, even he couldn’t pretend it was quite the same. His own issues had always been a little deeper than just a few bad dreams. Not that Edge probably wouldn’t benefit from a therapist; fuck, between him, Sans, and the Fell brothers, they could probably see about getting a group rate, but it didn’t feel like a battle worth fighting.

Not yet, anyway.

So, after spending a few days wracking his brain, trying to come up with something to do for Edge, he’d finally had an idea. Good idea? Time would tell, but he was hedging enough on it to have Edge following the GPS on his phone without letting him see the final address.

The building they pulled into was unimpressive, only two other cars in the parking lot and there was no sign to betray him.

Edge followed him up the walkway, waiting with silent wariness as Stretch knocked on the unassuming door. They didn’t have to wait long for a young Human woman to answer, smiling warmly even though she’d only met Stretch face to face once before, that very morning. They’d known each other on Twitter for a long time and had a pretty good working relationship, and she’d been eager to help when he asked for this very particular favor.

“Hello,” she said brightly, holding the door open, “Come on in, you’re right on time.”

“deena, this is my husband, edge.” Stretch told her as he toed off his shoes. Edge did the same, slower, though he nodded to her politely, shaking her hand when she offered it.

“It’s good to meet you in person, Edge,” Deena smiled. “Just follow me.”

“What is this?” Edge muttered, low enough to only carry to Stretch. His confusion deepened at the sound that was getting louder as they walked down the hallway, whimpers and whines. At the end was a doorway blocked by a baby gate and behind it were crying balls of fluffy puppy, all of them piled together in front of the gate.

“Get back, you little beasts,” Deena laughed, stepping over the gate. She made her way to the back of the room where there was a table laden with items. “You’ll have to excuse their manners, they’re hungry.”

Stretch followed her and, more reluctantly, Edge. The puppies milled at their feet and Stretch reached down to pick one of the squirmy bundles up.

“this is the hearts of hope animal shelter,” Stretch told his husband, petting the eager puppy in his arms. “i post for them all the time on my twitter for donations and adoptions. someone found these little guys in a box behind a dumpster and they’re fostering them until their old enough to adopt.” Without waiting for any protests, he thrust the puppy into Edge’s hands, waiting only long enough for him reflexively catch it before letting go and snagging up another.

“Rus…” Edge murmured warningly.

“it’s not what you think, i promise. i’m not angling for another pet, the chickens are good.” He grinned, nuzzling into soft fur. “but come on, look!”

The puppies looked like little toasted marshmallows, puffy white overlaid with tan, the leftover little ones tumbling around their feet, whimpering and crying. Deena came back carrying a box of filled bottles, handed one to Edge and Rus before gathering up a puppy of her own.

“Here you go, greedy Gus,” she laughed as the puppy latched on to the nipple instantly, suckling hungrily. “They eat so much at this age.”

Stretch offered the bottle to the puppy in his arms, sinking down to sit on a clean spot on the floor. Another puppy took the opportunity to clamber into his lap, and Stretch laughed, snagging another bottle and trying to feed two at once.

It was worth all the effort, all the worrying and planning, to see Edge shifting to sit next to him, inexpertly handling his own puppy, but soon each one of the floofs had a bottle and were eating with blissful eagerness.

It didn’t take long for them to drain the bottles and that left them with a lapful of sleepy little critters, their tummies round and full.

“There we are, you little troublemakers,” Deena crooned. She gathered up her puppy and sat it fearlessly into Edge’s lap where it curled up with his sibling. Stretch loved her a little for that, but then, she had a lot of experience in dealing with bruised souls, didn’t she? “Hold them for a bit, could you, while I clean up?”

“I…all right,” Edge agreed, a little helplessly, as Deena gathered up the empty bottles and left. He stroked a tentative hand over his puppies, petting gently. One of them kicked a foot, whimpering indistinctly and sighing as Edge scratched behind one tiny ear. Softly, he asked, “What made you think to bring me here?”

Stretch shrugged a little, petting his own sleepy fluffies. “you told me once how loyal the dogs of your Snowdin were. i just thought…you sounded like you maybe you missed them.”

“They were very loyal,” Edge agreed. It did not escape Stretch’s notice that he didn’t say anything about missing them. “But puppies of Aboveground are not the same as Monsters.”

Stretch only shrugged again. No, they weren’t, but Edge didn’t stop petting them, either.

He did slant Stretch a narrow look. “We aren’t taking one home.”

“nope, not even asking,” Stretch agreed, gathering up one of his puppies to nuzzle soft fur. “these are more like…therapy dogs.”

“I don’t—” Edge began and stopped, biting off the words.

“don’t what?” Stretch settled his drowsy puppy back into his lap, trailing his fingers through silky fur. “don’t need therapy? you can say it, i’m not offended.”

A flicker of something like guilt tinted Edge’s expression. “I don’t mean to imply there is anything wrong with needing it.”

“you aren’t,” Stretch said firmly. “now c’mon, these little guys need your help.”

It was deliberate phrasing, and even if Edge knew what he was doing, it tended to work. Edge was hardwired somewhere in a way that made him like helping. Even puppies.

“My help?” Edge said dubiously, but he took the sleeping puppy Stretch handed him, gently adding him to his pile.

“yep. he needs pets and loves.”

There was something indescribably precious about seeing his fierce, proud husband with a lapful of sleeping puppies curled against him. Petting them carefully, heedless of the shed fur clinging to his expensive trousers. No wonder Edge had so many clothes; married to Stretch, he sure as hell went through them. Their drycleaner was going to be able to retire in the tropics.

He couldn’t resist snapping a picture of it, planning on making it the background on his phone. Only to blink in surprise when Edge asked him, hesitantly. “Do you think posting a picture to Twitter would be helpful for adopting them out? My appearance is sometimes…unnerving for Humans.”

Well, that was an unpleasant realization to sneak in amidst all the adorable. Was that really why Edge didn’t like Stretch posting pictures of him online? It was on the tip of his tongue to say it wasn’t true and even if it was, he didn’t give a flying fuck. Edge was fucking gorgeous, sexy as all hell, and he didn’t give a shit what any coldhearted Humans thought about it.

He choked it back. That wasn’t going to help and Edge preferred honesty, even if it was unpleasant. They were using his Twitter and Instagram for propaganda, that was a fact, and Edge did look fierce sometimes to people, no, to fucking idiots who couldn’t look beneath the hard crust to see the marshmallow filling beneath. A picture didn’t give context; Stretch knew his love, knew how tender, how gentle and caring he was.

Stretch took a long, slow breath, and considered his words carefully. “tell you what, i’ll get a few shots that’ll let me post about the puppies online but still protect your privacy, yeah? so people don’t stop you on the street to ask for your autograph. and you can see them first, get veto rights.”

Must not have done too badly, because Edge’s smile was easier, his hesitance falling away, “All right.”

They stayed for a while longer, cuddling the puppies. One of them woke up enough to gnaw on Stretch’s fingers a little too enthusiastically with his needle-sharp little teeth, making him curse and Edge chuckle. It woke the rest of them and soon they went from snoozing balls of fluff to playful, tumbling ones, tugging eagerly on a rope toy as Edge held it or clambering into his lap for more pets and scritches, until they both were laughing, Deena staying tactfully away for the time being.

Not a cure for nightmares, Stretch knew, not an answer to his husband’s troubles, but it was hard to be too miserable when you were covered in puppies.

-finis-

#spicyhoney #papcest #keelywolfe #underfell #underswap #underswap papyrus #underfell papyrus #by any other name

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sadb0ysims · 5 years

Photo

THE SIMSELF TAG featuring yours truly and her wonderful assistant, antoinette

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? mia and thats all ur getting out of me

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? oh god we have some embarrassing ones but jordan and jords are nicknames of mine and u might be able to guess the other obvious ones dgjhfdj

3. BIRTHDAY? february 25th babey

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? OH uhh princess diaries by meg cabot probably

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? not to sure about those funky alien dudes but ehh yeah i believe in ghosts

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? i’d say michael morpurgo but that’s probably because his books were shoved down my throat at an early age DKJDFGJ if you can have a favourite poet i can answer this: atticus and lang leav

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? radio one probably!!

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? the purple one. like, starburst? purple. wine gum? purple

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? being the millenial i am probably Uh...li...litty

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG? OH Hm i’d say ocean eyes by billie eilish

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? Hm!

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO? copycat by billie eilish!!

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? LIE TO ME IS THE UNDER APPRECIATED SERIES OF THE CENTURY

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? oh uhh i don’t watch films a lot and especially not if i’m feeling?? sad

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? never heard of them

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? OH jesus lets say. being forgotten or making no difference in the world

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? oh Jesus not a lot of these GJFDH over the past mm month or so i’d say i’ve grown a lot as a person in the fact that i have more respect for myself than i used to, and if i have an opinion on something i evaluate it and decide Do People Really Need To Know? (DPRNTK)

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? EASY my weird. defense mechanism thing. i’ve gotten a bit better in my opinion but the reason i’m usually in so much trouble is because as soon as i’m attacked, i act with anger? its some weird defensive wall that i put up and regret later because i’m not really thinking like a rational person. i just see that i’m being attacked and my first thought is to fight back

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? OH cats because i haven’t had one in ages. one of our cats was run over and the other was taken by our neighbours and now he doesn’t even remember us or respond to his name so thats really fun

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? SUMMER because my skin turns olive in the summer and right now. a bitch is pale! also school is so much nicer in the summer... the whole yeargroup feels like much more of a community because we all sit together outside n it’s just overall very fun and makes me nostalgic of year 7

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? bitch u really thought-

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? still in it but. because of a lot of things i was forced to grow up very fast. something i miss is having everyone in the house (my siblings are both a lot older than me so they’re never around) and not having to worry about fitting into certain stereotypes or WASHING MY HAIR!!!!!

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? oh god ok so i have a “best friend” but we don’t. agree on a lot of things and she takes everything i say 100% seriously so even though we’re not close i’d consider this group of boys from my school my best friends. and online ofc i have Many Many good friends which i would name but i dont wanna leave anyone out bc i talk to A Lot of people DGHDFJ

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? blue blue blue

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? blonde babey

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? my brother

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? would say myself but sometimes i’m not even sure i can trust HER

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? i think about people loads because im a lonely romantic so. i’d say Love Interest and i think about myself a whole lot too like who does this bitch think she is

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? all the time i’m looking forward to things bc. not a whole lot happens in my life so if Love Interest looks at me a certain way i’ll look forward to going to school for the next couple weeks FDJGHFDJ

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? i think of the future way too much. she’s a dreamer

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? oh god uhhh i used to cry at in the night garden all the time when it ended bc i hated that iggle piggle sailed away on his boat DJHFD it was probably still my favourite though

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? i had a best friend who moved away after year seven and i feel like i could but. who knows we haven’t seen each other for years

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? sigh i think so like does it count if my tarot deck says not to do something because. i trust those tarot bitches with all my soul if i have one

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? don’t like the dark, i have a fear of holes, can’t sleep without the door open, can’t sleep when i can see in a mirror (fun fact theres a mirror in my room but it’s on a shelf which i can barely see at night like. i can see a glimpse. but knowing it’s there freaks me out so its flipped and has something covering it)

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT? oh ummmm in front i guess because 1. i look horrible in photos other people have taken of me 2. technically being in front of it. you can still take selfies and 3. the people i know take pictures from really weird angles

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? we love a bit of vidya games but i love reading poetry because i’m a whore and also i like singing but that doesn’t mean im good at it!

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? UHHH god i really dont read uhh probably lullabies by lang leav

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? romeo and juliet (the blessed one featuring young leo dicaprio)

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? i can play the guitar, the recorder, a bit of the piano

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? GIRAFFES it’s really sad that they’re now endangered. if ur talkin domestic pets i love guinea pigs, cats and (i’ve never had them but rats

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? don’t. this’ll turn into a follow forever and i won’t get any clout bc it’s in such a long post !

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? OH hm. i thought as hard as my tiny brain could about this and i think teleportation would be interesting but if we can choose ANY superpower. is magic one? that’d b pretty wack

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? when i’m walking to school at half 7 in the morning and no one’s there and i can hear the trees lining the field rustling in the wind in the distance. it was rainng this morning and even though my whole ass was exposed from the wind and i was soaking it was really peaceful. also there’s a red kite that’s resident to our school field and i love to stand there in the morning and watch it sometimes

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? feeling included DGJHDJ doesn’t happen a whole lot

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? i play a lot of sports because i’m in school obviously but i’m really good at rugby bc a bitch is Tactical and Nimble. i love hockey and badminton and stuff though

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? i LOVE smoothies and milkshakes and everything ugh. i’d be bold enough to say i love drinks more than i love food. like apple juice orange juice MIXED juice smoothies BROWN BAG MILKSHAKES! BITCH! THE STRAWBERRY ONE IS SO GOOD UGH

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? oh jesus um. 4 years ago

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? fuck yeah brother

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? UGH A LOT OF THINGS like. people biting their nails. people tapping their foot on my chair. people not listening when you’re explaining something THEY needed help with. tapping a pen on a desk or clicking it on and off

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? nop

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? my mother is a vegetarian so i eat a lot of vegetarian meals. sometimes i get really put off meat but like. a bitch is 13 and doesn’t pay for her own meals so she doesn’t really get a say in what she eats

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? always wanted to entertain people and be nationally recognised. take that as u will

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? TOO MANY let’s go... the arcana so i can marry the 1 (one) love of my life dr julian ilyushka devorak... chill in the hanged man’s realm...

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? i don’t worry about a lot not gonna lie to u

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? cheers i’ll drink to that broe

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? if the screeching sound i make to a slight tune counts as singing then. yes

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? not illegally but i’ve had days off sick where i wasn’t sick bc i couldn’t be asked

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? alone

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? somewhere safe

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? yeah i have a dog and a cat but as i said m cat got taken by my neighbours and doesn’t even remember us so sjfhdjg

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? night owl but if i’m rested well enough i love being up early

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? sunsets

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? no a bitch is 13

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? probably headphones bc i can’t lose them and the sound quality is better but i’m not a MONSTER so earphones. also headphones automatically make old people scoff at u and hate u more

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? nah

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? whatever’s poetic enough to be On Brand

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? don’t really have one

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? no

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? the holier than thou attitude Often showcased on simblr by some. familiar faces

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? it doesn’t really make a difference

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? computer science (mainly for the people because right now we’re just making fucking. powerpoints) or english bc of the people again

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? yee a brother and a sister

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? christmas presents and some perfume & a purse for me

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5′4

75. CAN YOU COOK? not well

76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? attention DFJHGSDJ uhh being kind to people who deserve it and hard work paying off

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? patronization, people who believe their opinion is the only opinion and people who cause minor inconveniences for you for no reason

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? more female probably but i prefer guys

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? i say bisexual but no one’s ever been close enough to let me find out

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? party in the UK

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? kyla rosymiel

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? UHHH i really can’t remember i know me and kyla were talking about something and i started crying JGFHDGJ

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? oh god umm probably smii7y but i also really like all his friends like. kryoz etc

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? when i look good FJDHSJD

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? would say tumblr but she’s gone ! right now i’m really feeling zepeto bc It May Be Tracking Me but it lets me take pics with all my online friends and i have some sort of weird following on there SDFHSDJ

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? i don’t think i’ll ever be able to fully confide in them, i really like my dad but there’s elements of him that don’t really float my boat. same with my mum but i’m less close with her

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? probably australian or. is it swiss? might be swiss.

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? france and ofc america

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 4

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? with like 2 things skdghsd

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? not really but i believe in a higher power of some sort and a life after death. i believe there’s something out there that is listening but i prefer to think it’s the stars

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OF THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? i find the ocean really ineresting but man will always romanticise space

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? im a 13 year old white girl how ruthless can i be

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? sesame seeds

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? nop but everyone else in my family can

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? nope

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? whenever i realise

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? forest

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? it’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR? i lie all the time but i am. SO terrible ASJDFHJ i would love to lie less but it’s so easy to slip into one

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? gryffindor

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? hell yea brother

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? kyla put ambivert so i looked that up and. yeah

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? did when i was younger but i guess tumblr is somewhat of a personal diary

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? depends

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? turn it in most likely

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? “yes, but you should never forget about their past” thanks kyla

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? only monsters aren’t

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? nope

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? i have my ears pierced. WILD i know

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? UGH FUCK DR JULIAN ILYUSHKA DEVORAK!! it’d be illegal for him to marry anyone but me though

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? yep! i have a tattoo on my back. i plan on getting a lot more tattoos in the future, but i don’t want anymore in the near future

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? being outspoken and not. watching things pass by

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? of course

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? nopee

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? oof i really don’t know because of what’s happened to me i don’t know if i could knowing i could never protect them from everything. idk pregnancy seems very nice but once the kid gets annoying thats It for me

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? “i think everyone is smart in their own way” thanks kyla

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? i started laughing once in drama and i pissed myself a lil and i was like ehh thats fine i do that all the time and then i didnt stop pissing and someone was like ‘whats that wet on the floor? they were like mia have u pissed urslef i was like nOSDJF so i had to ask the teacher to leave. u coiuld see the piss down my leg

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? have u SEEN these bags. she’s seen hell

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOUR CLOTHES? like varying tones of beige and then grey/black

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? of course

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? oh uhhh i feel like maybe when i was younger but i’ve. repressed that memory if i have it

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 13 years young

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? oh jesus something poetic and by atticus probably let’s see

after spending more time searching for a quote than i did on literally this whole tag, i decided on this. and then i realised. it will always be ‘YOU ARE A SAD BOY’

#the last one was abt food #but i thought the quote was a nice finishing touch #sadb0ysims #ask game #?

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iin-desuyo · 6 years

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Rules: Tag 10 followers you want to get to know better

I was tagged by the wonderful @awsmazingfandoms Thank you <3<3

Name: Marte

Gender: female

Star sign: Capricorn

Height: About 161 cm or 5′2 feet

Sexuality: well I thought I was pan, but maybe I am a lesbian or maybe I’m straight, though i might be bi, or maybe I am actually pan, so honestly i don’t know anymore hAHAh

What image do you have as wallpaper: On my computer I have BTS on the stage looking out over the crowd of armys. On my IPad I have BTS getting an award. On my Phone I have that “The late night show” BTS group picture of all their faces squished together ;;u;;

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?: Nope, but i remember once in kindergarden I looked at a Kindergarden Aunt and thought “is it possible to like girls?”, so I wouldn’t call that a crush but wow little me, i can’t believe I had forgotten this until recently

Where do you see yourself in 10 years: Not sure at all, I’m scared I’ll still be sick and miserable without being able to go to school or get a job... Though I wish to be a full time artist

If you could be anywhere else right now, where?: Ohhh somewhere comfortably warm on a isolated beach, swimming. My family not being too far away, but not with me at the beach, as i just want some comfortable peace and quiet

What was your coolest Halloween costume?: My family never celebrated Halloween

What’s your favorite 90s show?: Is Friends a 90′s show

Last kiss?: lmao NEVER (keeping this hahahah same)

Have you ever been stood up?: Yeah :// several times

Have you ever been to Las Vegas?: no

Favorite pair of shoes: My sneakers, I basically only wear sneakers or mountain shoes

Favorite fruit: CLEMENTINES

Favorite book: Silo by Hugh Howey, I recommend it!!!

Stupidest thing you’ve ever done: I’m not sure what the stupidest thing I have done is... but once i was at my grandmas for a family gathering and was talking to my older cousin about VSauce on youtube, and i blurted out “OH!! Have you seen his RedTube series??” WHILE I ACTUALLY MEANT HIS YOUTUBE RED SERIES OH MY GOD HIS EYES WENT SO WIDE I CANT BELIEVE I UTTERED THOSE WORDS IN THE RELIGIOUS HOME OF MY GRANDMA WITH ALL MY RELATIVES PRESENT ASDFGHJKLDSDFGHJSFG!!!! KILL ME!!! WHY DOES YOUTUBE RED HAVE TO BE YOUTUBE RED WHY NOR USE LITERALLY ANY OTHER COLOUR THAT ISNT SIMILAR TO A PORN WEBSITE OH MY GOD!!??

so.... yeah.... it was an honest mistake but that might not be very far away from the stupidest thing i have ever done wow im sorry

tagging: @pandajelo @jawololo @ttachibana @dark-lore-chan @thebluehoodie @sleepingwonders @bahare-no No pressure, only if you want to <3

#me #wow it's been so long!!#thanks for tagging me <3<3 #you are awesome #hope i didnt ramble too much lmao #martemumbles

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iftherebethornsrp · 6 years

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EVENT 13 - AU WEEK!

23 December 2017 - 03 January 2018

Beginning on 12:00am CST on Saturday, our roleplay will be taking a pause moving forward. This is both so that the roleplay as a whole can enjoy an alternative universe and so pressure is off during the holidays and we can all have a bunch of fun into the new year!

For those of you new to this idea, an alternative universe week is when you are able to break away from what your character might normally do and assume a different story for your character. Read below for more information! At the end of reading all of this, if there are any questions, please ask! What I think makes sense might not be what actually makes sense.

There will be a post at midnight on Saturday letting you know starters are free to be posted!

Also, to give everyone the same information, I’d love for people to write in and give a brief 1-2 sentence explanation of where their character is in the two open AUs. For example, “Tilden Toots has survived the war as a neutral observer, but his marriage to Daisy Hookum did not last the stress of the war and he now is a Radio Talk Show host living alone in the outskirts of London.”

OOC INFORMATION!

There are three different ways to be involved in this AU week and a half. As a whole roleplay, there will be two scenarios you can post open starters to (this is your time for Happy Everyone Survives Time!) Then, you have the choice to post closed starters that you have planned with someone else. You can be involved in all three, two, or just one! The choice is yours. Read more below!

1. One group AU is starting in September of 1991. Harry Potter and the gang will be starting their first year of Hogwarts. Voldemort has been defeated as far as anyone knows. The night he went to murder the Potters, Lily and James’s intent to sacrifice themselves for Harry backfired on Voldemort same as it did in canon. After that moment, many of his followers were captured and sentenced to Azkaban. Where has your character been since that night? Was your character found at fault for following the Dark Lord? Did they manage to claim Imperius curse? Have they been living it up in some swanky job at the Ministry, or did the war ruin them? Is Hogwarts their new place of employment or do they have children attending? Endless possibilities! Come actually have happy future for once! (TL;DR: Everything is the same except Lily and James didn’t die, and yes, characters who may have died may still live, of course!) Please tag all starters with Thorns91.

2. The second group AU is starting in September 1980, only a month after the downfall of Voldemort. In this AU, a large fight broke out between the Death Eaters and the Order. Heavy losses were taken on both sides. The group sacrifice had a chain reaction and as Voldemort attacked, a bright light appeared and he was no longer there. The suddenness of it all meant the Oder was able to defeat the Death Eaters swiftly, shocking everyone. The world, both magical and muggle, is still rebuilding. Names of Voldemort’s followers are still coming to lights. Those who fought in the Order and on the Order’s side have received Order of Merlin awards, but not everyone feels like they deserved it. Heavy losses were taken on both sides and everyone still needs to heal. Both in the fright of the height of the war as well as the joy of Voldemort’s downfall, engagements and weddings have been popping up left and right as well as news of pregnancies and other exciting events. How will you celebrate the downfall of the Dark Lord? (Once again, characters who died may live, etc) Please tag all starters with Thorns80.

3. This is not a group AU. This is your opportunity to do whatever AU you want. The main rule is that all of these starters have to be closed. So, anything you do here needs to be discussed with another player and just between you and that player (or you and a couple of players if you want a three/four/five way thread.) In other words, should you want to play out Antonin Dolohov and Dolores Umbridge as leaders of the free world, the Antonin and Dolores players would have to decide this on their own and make a closed starter for it that only the two of them can write. With these, there are no limits to what you can make the AU. Mermaids, werewolves, high school, childhood, New York City, Broadway, drug lords, military, and anything else you can think of. All I ask is that starters are pre-planned and closed since you can post open starters for the two group AUs that still stick to the main verse. Feel free to do this plotting via IM, OOC, inbox, whatever you find easiest. I don’t mind the OOC flooding with “Does anyone want to do a Star Wars AU?” post and letting multiple people reply!

WHERE ARE THEY NOW - 1991:

Alice Longbottom - After the war, Alice went to St. Mungo’s to train as a healer, which had always been her personal goal. She and Frank welcomed two more children to the family and spend their free time together at their family home.

Augustus Rookwood - He’s finally settled down, and Mr Skeeter-Rookwood couldn’t be any happier. After spending years watching from afar as Rita took the backseat in her own life, he was more than willing to let her chase her dreams (and her scoops) when she made her way back to him. Now, Rita works, and Augustus stays home with Astor while Gabriel is off at school after having retired young from his post in the Dept. of Ministries.

Andromeda Tonks - Now that Nymphadora is older, Andromeda has gone back to St Mungo’s and resumed her career as a healer. The years have been rough at times, but nothing has ever been more important to Andromeda than family, and family dinners have never been dull- not with the Blackinnon, Jily, and sometimes Skeetwood, families around.

Caradoc Dearborn - Caradoc found happiness. He works as a muggle vet and also lives in the forest in a cabin he built himself. He lives off the land and still protests for world peace. He’s also running a successful home company of brewing Rum. Gladys is back to be his long-term room mate now she has returned from her travels, as opposed to going back and forth as she had for the last several years.

Charity Burbage - After spending the past few years avoiding her parents and living a quiet life in a small muggle town, Charity seems to have finally found her place in the world. She is back at Hogwarts, the one place she truly felt at home, and is the brand new Professor of Muggle Studies. She couldn’t imagine anything better than getting to ramble on and on about her favorite topic: muggles. She seems to think that she brings a fresh take on them, especially after living among them for so long. Although, Charity does have issues with some of the children.

Gladys Gudgeon - Barely a year after the war was over, Gladys returned to Egypt. While there, she lived out her dream of being a curse breaker. She had her flings and fun, but nothing ever stuck. After a while, she began to feel unfulfilled. When her team returned from Egypt, she came back with them. She’s hoping to potentially apply as a teachers assistant at Hogwarts, but is currently back to being Caradoc’s full time roommate (whereas she was going back and forth between his place and Egypt) while she figures out her next step.

Glenda Chittock - Glenda is currently in a relationship with another woman and she is now a broadcast producer, still working for the WWN and hosts her own 1 hour programme every evening called The Witching Hour. Her siblings are now older, grown up, her younger sister Stella still lives with her- although now they live in a nicer area and larger house. She has also adopted two children from the magical orphanage as she discovered that she couldn’t have children after a curse in 1979.

Gwenog Jones - Although she remains unmarried, Gwen has two children by different fathers and the eldest is going off to Hogwarts. She is a renowned Quidditch star and is the front-runner to become the Harpies’ new Captain.

James Potter - It simply did not seem possible that Harry was old enough to go to Hogwarts this year, but James couldn’t be more excited. He’s been instilling the idea in all four of his children that they’re going to be Gryffindors when they go away to school, and he has dreams of them all playing quidditch someday, just like him. It’s gotten harder, being on the road and playing quidditch professionally with his children growing up, and Lily and James have begun to discuss his retirement from the sport within the next year.

Lily Potter - Still happily married to James, and the mother of four, Lily is still a whiz at Potions and keeping her skills from growing rusty, as she plans to take over for Slughorn in the next year or so. Life is never boring at the Potters’, though, and as she chases her children (aged 11, 9, 6, and 4) and Sirius, Ruby, and Scarlett around the house, there’s always joy and laughter. With Harry going off to Hogwarts this year to join Gabriel and Nymphadora, Lily is ready to tackle new adventures with James (as soon as he’s done being the Quidditch god she’s so proud of) and their ever growing brood.

Lucius Malfoy - The Malfoys got busy and now have five children. Lucius spends his time raising them with Narcissa but still makes sure he is caught up on politics with visits to the Ministry every other week.

Lucy Karoonda - Lucy and Benjy managed to get along well enough to a point where the two were able to give living under one roof a chance for the sake of their son. With Quidditch no longer in the picture, she has taken a position as editor of the Sports section of the Daily Prophet.

Marlene McKinnon - In a place where she never thought she’d be, Marlene is amazingly married to Sirius with their daughters, Scarlett and Ruby. While she never fulfilled her original dream of running the auror department, she works part time as an assistant to the Minister for Magic. Her knowledge of the muggle and magical world as well as the pureblooded world served the minister well. Once Ruby is in school, Marlene intends to take on the position full time and keep rising.

Narcissa Malfoy - After they managed to make it through the fall of the Dark Lord in one piece, Narcissa focused on rearing her children and supporting her husband. She enjoys a place in the upper echelons of pureblood society and frequently hosts balls and parties at Malfoy Manor.

Remus Lupin - Regardless of how hard he tries, Remus has been unable to get a job at the Ministry. Countless failures have left him feeling as though he is wasting his potential, sticking to the occasional odd job instead of fully applying himself to anything in the magical community.

Rita Skeeter - Rita is happily married to Augustus. She now runs The Daily Prophet and writes for a few muggle tabloids. She’s a working mum, leaving the now two boys at home. She’s also about to see her son off for his 3rd year.

Severus Snape - Ironically, Severus does end up at Hogwarts again. Now the Healer in charge of the Hospital wing channeling his own personal "saving people thing" into something much less stressful than war. With a long white apron and hair kept neatly back in a braid, he is a happier and more mellowed out version of his former self. Still, the children are all doxy egg-eating dunderheads and he is quick to tell them so.

Sirius Black - Marlene and Sirius are now married and living together with their daughters Scarlett and Ruby. She’s about to head off to Hogwarts. Sirius now works for the Auror office but also fixes motorcycles and cars in his spare time for his neighbours and town. He lives next door to Jily and their kids, he and James never being able to separate.

Ted Tonks - Ted landed a position on the Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee and is quite proud of it. He hopes to save up enough for him and Andie to take a brief vacation while Nymphadora is at school.

WHERE ARE THEY NOW - 1980:

Alice Longbottom - Alice and Frank somehow escaped the war - not completely unscathed or unharmed, but together and alive. Now that the Dark Lord is gone, they’re focusing on rebuilding their lives and pouring all their love into little Neville.

Andromeda Tonks - She’s a Healer at St Mungo’s, but lately, she’s been considering that it might be time to take a sabbatical and focus on raising her daughter, Nymphadora. Andromeda never wanted her child to feel unloved, and with everything that’s happened to their family, Andromeda wants Dora to know how cared for she is.

Augustus Rookwood - He’s been hard at work in the Dept of Mysteries practically since the moment he graduated, though he did take a little time out of his busy schedule to father a secret lovechild with Rita. She’s married, though, and he knows the story, so this is a fact that he’s kept to himself. Still, knowing that Rita, and his son Gabriel, are out there on the otherside of the world, the guilt of what he had done ate at him until he came clean. About 6 months earlier, Augustus went to Dumbledore to trade amnesty for information; he cleared his conscience, and along the way, gave the Order plenty of information on the Death Eaters. SInce he never took the mark, it was easier for Dumbledore to vouch for him, and now he’s in the clear.

Caradoc Dearborn - Caradoc was affected by the war. He found himself drawn in, fighting for his loved ones. Now, he’s lost and troubled, unsure on just what he was supposed to do. He currently has no job. His plans being put on hold since the war. He currently has no partner.

Charity Burbage - Charity had been working in the Misuse of Muggle Artefacts Office for the past 6 months, which is a job she hoped she would have loved. As it turns out, she dislikes it more and more each day and has seriously been contemplating quitting. This would most likely mean moving back in with her parents, which is something she would like to avoid at all costs.

Gladys Gudgeon - During the war, Gladys was in Egypt working as a cursebreaker. Although she knew someone was taking the information she learned back to the height of the war and using it against Voldemort, she was not in the loop and was not an integral part of the war. With the war over, she has returned home for a little while to check on her family.

Glenda Chittock - With the war freshly over, Glenda is working for the WWN. She had been a news correspondent, reporting from the front line, keeping the wizarding world informed on what was happening- especially with The Prophet being afraid to speak up. She also helped the Order, despite her siblings protests. With her gained independence, she won the rights of custody for her two younger siblings Stella and Matthew. She now lives with them in Battersea in a small flat.

Gwenog Jones - Gwen avoided getting embroiled in the war effort and instead joined the Holyhead Harpies as a Beater. With the defeat of Voldemort, she is looking forward to putting together a new life in a time of peace.

James Potter - Fathering a newborn is definitely not an easy job, but James is definitely glad to now be the only job that he has going on now. While the end of the war definitely came as a bit of a surprise, he can’t deny that it wasn’t a welcome one. Now, James is just excited to be able to raise his son in a world where he doesn’t have to worry about dark wizards, and spend time with his wife. Though, he can’t deny that Quidditch is starting to call his name once more.

Lily Potter - Mother to a newborn Harry, relieved is not a strong enough word to describe Lily’s feelings about the war’s end. She is happily married to James, and with their best friends next door, she finally feels like she can breathe again. If only she could get some sleep. Who would have known that babies were such hard work?

Lucius Malfoy - Having a newborn son left Lucius doing as was expected of him for the cause and nothing else to avoid getting his hands dirty since his family is more important. He retreated just before things got rough and nearly broke down when the Ministry took an interest in his involvement. Having been forced into it by his father left Luius able to give a convincing lie about having been acting under the imperious curse. With a son already in the picture it was made clear that he regretted anything he may have done under the curse.

Lucy Karoonda - A one night stand after a Quidditch victory against England left Lucy with an unexpected pregnancy that forced her into giving up her career. She has a gut feeling the baby's father is Benjy but has yet to get the nerve to mention the pregnancy.

Marlene McKinnon - For the next two years after graduation, she struggled with the war and her family. For the first time, she was able to be proud of her family when her father refused to financially support the war. The pride was short lived when they also refused to support the Order, claiming the entire war was foolish. During the final battle, Marlene admitted her feelings to Sirius after being separated since graduation. The excitement of surviving left them in a night together and, in the most cliche result Marlene could think of, left them pregnant. As she is just now finding out, Marlene has to decide what she wants the rest of her life to look like with no job and no promise of how Sirius will want to move forward.

Narcissa Malfoy - Narcissa Malfoy came through the war unscathed, with one baby and a second on the way. Her main priorities now are to keep her family safe and out of trouble.

Remus Lupin - Feelings of guilt have left Remus silent. He rarely speaks and has been trying to hand back his Order of Merlin award due to feeling unworthy of it. The damage done by the Order has left him realizing the monster inside him appeared without the full moon being present.

Rita Skeeter - Rita has come home for the first time since the birth of her son Gabriel in 1978 She previously moved to NY. Married into a wealthy publishing family. At the height of the war, being called back to see her family safe the pressure of her high profile marriage and the rules being thrust upon her drove her into Augustus’s arms- as a result Gabriel was conceived. She’s a trophy wife, her career on hold to supply children. She’s not happy.

Severus Snape - Severus Snape spied for the order for a few short but harrowing months. Now without the crushing guilt of Lily Potter's death, he does not feel beholden to Dumbledore and resists being forced into a teaching position at Hogwarts. Free to pursue his own interests, Severus has taken a Healing apprenticeship. He still makes a hobby of supplying his friends (the ones not in Azakaban) with potions he brews in his grotty London flat.

Sirius Black - With the war over, Sirius is currently in a predicament with Marlene. After splitting up after graduation and spending the past couple years fighting for survival- he now finds himself facing a brand new challenge. Admitting his feelings to Marlene which ended up with them sleeping together. They know have a baby on the way but he’s still trying to find his place in a world he truly thought was over for him. He doesn’t have a job, but the Ministry have offered to fast track him into the Auror programme.

Ted Tonks - An explosion the Death Eaters took credit for in muggle London took his brother Nolan's life and left his mother and Eli severely injured. Ted has closed off to everyone but his family and a select few, spending most of his time visiting his family in the hospital and doting on Nymphadora.

Questions asked and Answered:

Q. In the open AUs, is everything else the same? A. Yes, up until now, everything that has happened in the roleplay has still happened! Amycus still secretly stole everyone’s art work, the star gazing event happened, the Christmas parties... all of it. This is your chance to change the future - to live out that happily ever after your character might not’ve gotten! Perhaps they proposed during the war, afraid it was their last time to speak to their loved one? Maybe they ran and now are coming back a coward? It’s basically “canon” with a happier ending, if that makes sense. Not to say that your character can’t have suffered losses! They did just fight a war.

#thornsevent #thornsau

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warmau · 7 years

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hi!!!!! can I please request for a minhyun college au? I am addicted to your writing (･´з`･) thank you in advance xxx

for nu’est ive decided it’d be cool to make them all medical students!! so consider it residency-college!au LOL~

specialty: minhyun is doing his residency in dermatology

is known as the “pretty boy” of the unit and other residents are always joking that patients favor him because,,,,,,,,well one he has gorgeous skin,,,,,,,but everything else about him is literally just as gorgeous

is really sweet and tries his best to be polite,,,,,,even if taking another 10 hour shift is literally going to Kill Him,,,,,minhyun just smiles and is like : ) it’s fine : ) im fine

his superiors like him the most and their favoritism shows because guess who doesn’t get yelled out for taking a five minute snack break? it’s minhyun

but even though he comes off so mannered and mature,,,,,he has a lil nerdy side,,,,,like his phone background is always his cute niece and him but one day someone noticed that his lock screen was literally a screenshot from the transformers movie,,,,,,,like,,,,,,,,,

everyone keeps asking if he’s dating and minhyun is just like,,,,i,,,,,d,,dating?!?!?!?! and they’re like oh my god you have the face and you’re telling us you haven’t used it yet

and minhyun is like ?!?! i use it everyday to eat, to read - and everyone is like oh jesus no that’s nOT WHat we MEANT

but if anyone as much as dares to try to do ‘corrupt’ minhyun (as dongho affectionately refers to it) minhyun just turns pink and bites his lips and is like i!! don’t know anything about that,,,,,

boy is already in residency and sometimes if a patient get too close he has to excuse himself,,,,,,,soft boy

speaking of dongho and the rest of nu’est they all do residency in the same hospital so every now and then they’ll meet up to eat lunch outside

and everyone swoons because they’re the ~visual residents~ a group of goodlooking guys in white doctors coats,,,,,,what a dREAM

and then dongho gets crumbs all over his scrubs and minhyun is like come here i need to clean it - don’t you dare run from me- come bacK

is really good at his job though, so much so that people are like he doesn’t even need to do residency he knows sO MUCh

graduated at the top of his class in med school, still studies as diligently as before, literally takes notes on e v e r y t h i n g the doctors say

jr jokes that when minhyun opens his own dermatology clinic he should give all of them face lifts but minhyun is like,,,,,,,,im not doing that im doing immunodermatology wanna hear what i learned about leprosy-

jr: i gtg rn i was just trying to make a joke i am so sorry

anyway you also work in the hospital,,,,,but not as a resident or anything you’re actually in the tech department

and you know about minhyun because how can you not,,,,,but also,,,,,,,,he’s called the tech department like a minimum of twenty times a week because for some reason he’s super smart

but takes like ten years to type in a patients chart notes and he’s always getting a bit confused with the hospitals interface

and you,,,,,,,dont mind being the one called to help him i mean like have you /SEEN/ him

just standing beside him is like basking in the sunlights glow and u dont mind. not one bit. tbh u r not gonna like lie when u see a call from the dermatology dept u basically fight people for the phone

buuuuut you also know that it’s a one sided kinda thing,,,because minhyun could have anyone,,,,,,,literally

u can tell from the fact that his lab coats pockets are always full of candy, letters, and more that both patients and staff give him and yeah it makes ur heart sink a bit but like,,,,

whatever the short moment where you get to stand beside him at the desk and tell him (for the 15th time) how to reset the scheduling system works like,,,,,it’s enough

which is why when you get called down again, minhyun voice sounding apologetic over the phone u cheerily tell him it’s no problem - you’ll be right down to see what happened

but since the elevator is taking too long u decide to go down the stairs where,,,,you hear voices echoing as you get closer to the floor ur supposed to meet minhyun on

and???? they sound familiar,,,,,one is obviously dongho’s,,,,,and the other???? minhyun?

and u stop your steps,,,listening to their echoing words

“are you going to ask them? minhyun it’s been two weeks since you decided to say something and you’re still putting it off.”

“,,,,,what if they don’t like me-”

“NO OFFENSE BUT THATS NOT POSSIBLE”

you blink,,,,wondering if you’re hearing another voice,,,,,and it is,,,,this one belongs to another resident. ren

“minhyun, seriously you’re handsome. i dont say that a lot. but ur handsome. very handsome. look at me minhyun does it look like i would lie.”

and finally,,,,the calmest voice of the bunch belong to jr: “you should go for it. i think they like you too.”

and you’re not sure what else they say because the door opens and a couple of nurses rush by you, their footsteps making noise

and in your head you’re wondering,,,,,,who is it that minhyun likes,,,,,,,

but not wanting to get lost in your thoughts you rush down coming out into the dermatology dept and seeing minhyun leaning against the wall near the elevators.

you pat his shoulder,,making him jump a bit and the both of you breaking into blushing apologizes but then he mumbles that he’s pretty sure something is going on with the vital monitor

and you go inside the room to check it out

and as you’re doing your work,,,,you don’t notice minhyun bite his lip,,,,shy eyes trying to avoid your figure in the center of the room

quietly fidgeting with his name tag pinned to his collar

and when you turn, smile on your face “done! it just got unhooked-”

“are you free,,,,,on sunday?”

minhyun’s sudden question catches you off guard and you’re like w-what?? and he’s like,,,,,,,, “i-,,,,i have a shift,,,,but i can- it ends at 8 so i could take u to dinner,,,,,maybe,,,,,-”

minhyun,,,,with all his pretty features and polite personality cannot seem to stutter out a date invitation

but,,,,you also cant believe ur ears???? the person minhyun liked?????was you???

and you’re like “d-don’t you not have many free days? you should rest-”

“it’s ok! i want to,,,,,spend it with you.”

there’s something of a shy smile on his face,,,,but his eyes are nervous and you’re always feeling your palms sweat

because god u really want to say yes,,,,the happiness in your stomach is turning to butterflies,,,,,but you also know that minhyun should rest

so you go “ok,,,,,but how about we do something simple,,,,like watch a movie at my place?”

and minhyun almost turns cherry red at the mention of coming over and he refuses,,,,,saying it’d be un-gentlemen-y of him but ur just like pleassse it’s fine

safe to say you guys do have that date at your place but you purposly pick a boring movie so minhyun falls asleep fifteen minutes in and you let the tired med student sleep soundly on your shoulder as you do your own thing

and ofc when he wakes up minhyun is a mess of “im sorrys” and “im not a creep i promise” but u just laugh and tell him it’s ok,,,,,it was a perfect first date because u were able to see him rest

which honestly just makes minhyun’s heart flutter even more about you,,,,,on the way home he texts ren and is like “i think they’re an angel,,,,,,,”

dating med student!minhyun is slow at first because he’s surprisingly shy about pda or skinship,,,,,to the point where when he first holds ur hand he has to let go 5 minutes later and be like “its not that i dont want to,,,its just,,,,,my hand got sweat and i didnt want u to think thats gross-” and u had to grab his hand back and be like idc if its sweaty i want to hold it forever, minhyun once he gets more comfortable has a habit for always dusting off your uniform or tucking strands of your hair back because he thinks u look cute when ur all neat and whatnot, tbh dongho and jr tell minhyun it might be a lil weird but u like it,,,its minhyun’s personality so u accept it, since he works super long hours u dont really get to see each other often but minhyun really likes it when u text him what ur doing after work esp if u include pictures, at first he’d just be like oh! cool :D or looks yummy! but as you two get closer he’ll kinda be a little sappy saying things like even your silhouette is pretty or i wish i could be beside you right now, a constant struggle is showing people photos of you and minhyun together looking cute in the hospital lobby doing peace signs and ur like that’s my boyfriend! and people are like no no no thats a celebrity honey and ur like,,,no,,,,,no he’s my bf,,,,,,,basically people r just really shocked because minhyun’s visuals are no joke, whenever someone confesses to minhyun whether it’s a patient or a staff he gets all embarrassed but also secretly reaLLY likes saying he has a significant other that he is head over heels for, ren makes fun of him so much for it he imitates his voice and calls out ur name and is like head !!! oveR HEELs~~~!! and minhyun is like pLEASE and ren is just kiss kiss love love u two are sooooo corny, on an anniversary minhyun had work but he sent you a video of him playing on the piano and singing your favorite love song and it legitimately made you tear up, does this thing where when he gets really really tired he’ll never admit it but one kiss from you makes it feel like he can take on the WORLD, an exchange resident named aaron comes to visit and minhyun introduces you to him and is like he’s my bff and aaron is just like “so what base have you and minhyun reac-oK FINE I WONT ASK”, those rare times where residents get more than a day off minhyun always insists on doing the absolute most for you and sometimes you have to literally argue with him to let you do something because he works so hard you want to support him and make it easy, you cooked for him once and you can’t tell if him telling you he LOVED it was fake or real,,,,,,,you guys got matching sweaters from the nu’est boys as a gift and they’re bright pink and corny and minhyun refuses to wear them until you giggled and put it on and minhyun melts for anything you do so he was like ok FINE, surprised you once by pulling you into a storage closet at the hospital and letting a hand slip up your shirt and you were like minhyun?? ?against his neck and he,,,,,couldn’t keep it up you felt his cheeks go hot and he was a stuttering mess like ten minutes in but he was also like i just,,,i really wanted you i dont know what came over me ,,,,,WHAT A FREAKING CUTIE AMIRIGHT THO,,,,promises that once he is done with residency he’s going to get a good job and take you on vacation for never leaving his side through the hardest years of his life and you just kiss his nose and tell him not to worry about it,,,,,but seriously the only thing on minhyun’s mind sometimes (which he finds fascinating) is how much he really rEALLY wants to make you happy,,,,,,,,,,he wants a future,,,,with you

find others here: ong seongwoo | kang daniel | lee daehwi

#nu'est scenarios #nuest scenario #minhyun scenario #minhyun au #minhyun imagine #produce 101 scenarios #produce 101 season 2 #pd101 imagines #pd101 scenarios #nu'est au #nuest imagine #hwang minhyun #sfw #college!au #wanna one scenarios #wanna one

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kxias · 7 years

Text

...so, yeah, don’t rlly know how the fuck i got accepted to be quite honest w you??? like that definitely sounded fake but yet here we are??? anyways, hi, i’m red (she/her pronouns please) i’m 19 and i live in the est timezone and i am so, so excited about this roleplay — like i said, highkey was not expecting to get accepted so it certainly came as a shock when i refreshed the main before leaving to grab dinner and saw my post? i’ve been dying to put this muse of mine into play for a month or so now but i really haven’t been able to find a group that i was Down for up until i saw this one ! i am a heaux for uni rps, an even bigger one for the greek life rps since i in a million years would never be able to join greek life (yay introvert!!) and while i wasn’t here first time around, i’m happy to be here now and writing w all you lovely people ; i’m working on getting her stats and wanted connections up so pls bear with me, classes started back today and i’m trying to sift thru all the junk of my online courses while attempting to enjoy my last moments of freedom but they’ll be up soon ! in the meantime, there’s a bit beneath the cut about my baby angel and a few ideas to tide you over, make the heart go red and i’ll pop in your ims for plots ! and yes, i do ramble like this all the time so Get Ready !!

tw: death, slight depression, mentions of verbal/emotional abuse

have you read the gossip blog lately ? apparently, a GIGI HADID lookalike was seen strolling across campus with their DANCE textbook. but nah, that’s just KAIA ZAMAN, the TWENTY year old JUNIOR, i’m sure you know HER. they’re mostly known as THE SANGUINE because they’re very SILVER-TONGUED and INTREPID but also RETICENT and GUILELESS.

so kaia was born and raised in chicago, illinois, the only child her parents ever had due to a few factors — one of which being that it was incredibly hard for her mother to carry a child + rushed into an emergency hysterectomy right after kaia’s birth, so she was their rainbow baby

her parents did everything in their power to make kaia as happy as they possibly could since she had been everything they’d wanted for so long, so whether it was letting her watch another cartoon before bed or enrolling her in dance classes at the age of three after a full-fledged obsession with the nutcracker reached its pique, they pretty much granted her any wish she could’ve possibly had

at age four, a few nights after christmas, kaia and her parents were on their way home from dinner, taking a road that was pretty notorious for collecting black ice in the winter and got into a really bad accident, and this cost her both of her parents

so in her father’s will + due to a lack of any other eligible family members, kaia was left in the custody of her uncle ( dad’s younger brother ) and it was...disastrous, to say the least; daniel had pretty much resigned to a life of forever being a bachelor and fucking around and now he had a four year old niece that he was expected to raise???

her uncle was a trashbag with a few shreds of decency (driven by guilt) in him — he wasn’t going to dump her into the foster system but he sure as hell didn’t want anything to do with her ! so in true trashbag fashion, he just decided to completely neglect her, pretend like she wasn’t there and hope she’d get the hint, and it took her a while to figure this out?? kaia was a sweet kid who went from having a shit ton of affection and love to being ignored and treated like she was a nuisance, and it fucked w her head at four years old

she wound up raising herself; all her uncle was good for was giving her a place to live, making sure she had clothes on her back and food in her stomach, and putting on an act when people gave a second glance their way. the only time he really wanted anything to do with her was when he could benefit her somehow, like keep one of his girlfriends around ( they all found kaia adorable and daniel ‘admirable’ for stepping up ) or when it came to the $$, her parents had left her a little but daniel pretty much absorbed it and took it for himself, to throw more parties or buy booze or play sugar daddy to one of his hookups?? like i said, trashbag

kaia and her uncle were roommates at best, and that was pushing it — she struggled a lot with the neglect internally, and her way of coping was to push it down, push it down, suppress with a smiling face and act like all was well. daniel was enough of a decent person to let her continue with the dance lessons which she absolutely adored, dance was her Everything, and by the time she hit high school, she started teaching classes at the studio she learned at in order to make some $$ that daniel wouldn’t take for his own

the older she got, the more she’d fight back a little against daniel and they had their fair share of fights ( which usually ended in daniel saying something to shut her down entirely and she’d scramble away ) but even despite that, sHE NEVER GAVE UP HOPE ON HIM...?? like, kaia always gave him the benefit of the doubt even though he’d proved himself time and time again thAT HE DIDN’T DESERVE IT

to her it was v black and white, she didn’t understand why tf he wouldn’t just get over himself and be a Family ( daniel is Where she gets her stubbornness tbh ) but despite having a little resent towards him, kaia never ever stopped hoping that he’d wake up one day and they’d start being a family and she still hasn’t bc optimist in the highest degree

when it came to college, kaia knew if she didn’t get out of chicago she was literally going to be sick, there was just smth about the loneliness there that made her skin crawl ( she also hates the winter now so she had to get as far away from snow as possible lmao ) and so she was like “alright i need a college on the west coast and w my dance major”, found crawford, and it was Settled

you ain’t getting my gossip blog secret out of me *wink*

anyways, now that the tragic backstory has been #unlocked...onto kaia

she’s the sanguine, which basically means bitch is a ball of sunshine, which she is — there’s no such thing as a stranger in her world, she likes constantly being surrounded by people ( bc she gotta make up for being lonely all those childhood years, thanks a ton dAN ) and making new friends and going out, she just loves people and people usually love her, she knows how to reel them in and keep them by her side, girlie will do Anything

she flat-out refuses to see the bad in people, even if it is staring her in the face, and this is where her stubborn nature comes in to play?? you can’t tell her anything, once her mind is set on something there is no hope of ever talking her out of it, she’s got to come to her senses on her own and even then it’s usually too late or she diminishes the impact of it?? she’s rash and got bad tunnel vision so it’s p clear where disaster lies w her

has the unhealthiest coping mechanisms on the history of the planet, tbh; she thinks the cure to everything is putting a smile on and acting like it’s not a problem and while that works when one fails a test, it doesn’t work w everything and she’s just forced so much pain and depression and anger down that it is Bound to come right back up at some point, so basically homegirl is a ticking time bomb

kaia’s also a people pleaser, she’d literally give you a kidney if you asked, which makes it easy for people to manipulate her?? and she doesn’t always see when she’s being manipulated either?? and won’t always stand up for herself when she’s being treated unfairly??? she just likes keeping the peace if at all possible

blurs the line a lot between doing things because she can and doing things because she feels an obligation to so she doesn’t let anyone down

ever since her parents died, she doesn’t like to give anything a second-guess — if she wants to do something, then she’s doing it, because it may not come back around again or she may not have the chance to. is the Definition of living in the moment, which is nice in theory, but kaia is v bad at compartmentalizing so it’s easy for her to get off track or ofc do things that will come back to bite her

dance is life, i’m not even gonna go into detail on it bc this is long enough already and like.....it’s just her whole world, ok, moving along

she wants everyone to let her in but she very rarely returns the favor, which is why i gave her the reticent trait?? she doesn’t tell people about her parents or her uncle, doesn’t let people see that iceberg of emotions underneath the surface, she acts like if it doesn’t exist then it doesn’t as far as anyone’s concerned???

girl is one of the greatest friends you could ever have but is a piece of work when you think about it, tbh, so that being said come love us !

and if you read this far: the reason this STUPID vine is my ooc tag is bc i have an ex named kyle who is a piece of trash and that vine is a p accurate description of how i feel about him.....plus it just makes me laugh ok going now

#「 •• 𝓸𝓯 𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓾𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓼 ; what the fuck is up red.#crwfrd.intro

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