#im not super mad about it anymore but my step mom likes to tell me she cant do anything about anything i talk about

[unfortunate-development]

ngl if you say shit like “dont go all teenager-y on me” i kinda hate u. theres a reason they act like that and its probably not listening to them or making them feel like theyre not welcome to come to you and then making them feel like shit when they bottle stuff up or something. or just not trusting adults in general cause they did shit like this to them. like.

#its windy in these sewers #< vent tag #im not super mad about it anymore but my step mom likes to tell me she cant do anything about anything i talk about #or tells me she cant deal with this shit (even though its Her Kids) #and then she tells me that??? like ma'am. how do i explain that youre shitty at listening to me i am Going to be Frustrated

[from-a-reckless-writer]

They were fighting.

In the DEO.

Again.

“Moms fighting again?” Nia casually leans on the desk next to Brainy, who is currently hunched over some screen. 

“It appears so,” He answers, not really paying attention. In the distance you can hear yelling and the tell-tale woosh of a cape. 

Nia had removed her comms the moment Supergirl spotted Lena Luthor on the field. She’s pretty sure half of the agents did the same. They all knew what was coming. 

And well, if the approaching bickering were any indication... 

“I had it covered!”

“Yes, because an on-coming missile with your name on it was you having it covered, clearly.”

“I saved ten lives today, Supergirl. Jealous you only saved three?”

“It isn’t about that and you know it.”

Nia sees Alex stride in, obviously going in for an attempt to pacify Supergirl. 

And also because it was partly Alex’s idea to send Lena with the Alpha team, in her defense Lena was the only person she could trust enough not to tamper with the device.

“Come on, Supergirl, Lena is more than capable in the field and she volunteered. She saved the day, you kno—”

“Butt out of this, Alex.” Supergirl grits out, too busy staring Lena down to even spare her sister a glance. 

“Sorry?” Alex scoffs, shocked at how easy she was brushed aside. She was tempted to pull rank and use the ‘I’m the Director, here.’ card, if she was being honest.

“No, Alex is right,” Lena points out, “I did save the day. Time for you to acknowledge that the both of us are just as capable as the other. And if saving the day means getting in the line of fire, then so be it.”

“This isn’t about you being incapable-”

“Then tell me what exactly is it about?”

Supergirl licks her lips, swallows and Lena braces herself for another retort but instead she fixes her with a stare that only Supergirl reserves for the bad guys and coolly states, “You are not to go out in the field and that’s final.”

She turns to walk out but Lena’s temper just skyrocketed tenfold. 

“Wow. You did not just say that to my face.” There was something in the way that Lena Luthor’s voice dropped that made Supergirl turn around. DEO agents are openly watching on now, not even bothering at subtlety anymore. The two women fighting in front of the whole agency certainly haven’t tried subtle at all. 

“Let’s make something clear here, Supergirl,” Lena fumed,  “This is my life and I get to call the shots. You don’t get a say in what I decide to do or not to do. Who the hell do you think you are?”

“I don’t have a say? Rao, sorry my mistake! Forgive me for thinking that my sharing a last name with you means a cent to you as much as it does to me. You’re right, who the hell am I anyway? Sorry for wanting to keep you alive.”

Supergirl is breathing heavily two inches away from Lena’s face. Heat and anger rolling off the both of them in waves. They’re in a world of their own now. A world in which Lena is having trouble deciding on whether she should scream some more or pull Supergirl’s lips into her own. 

“Im sorry- Last name?” 

The voice wakes them to reality. A reality that makes both of them sober up and realize they’re in the middle of a very exposed DEO headquarters; makes them aware of the collective gasp that has just happened. 

Supergirl backs away. 

“Please, fucking tell me that I heard you wrong. Or I swear to God-”

Alex heads straight for Supergirl and Lena quickly realizes the implications of what Supergirl had just said. She essentially confirmed to the entire place that they’re— 

“Alex, I can—”

“Yes or no, are you or are you not married?”

So, this is how Alex Danvers makes criminals confess. Lena had never seen Supergirl cower before, but by the looks of it, if Lena had been the one in the hero’s boots she’d also be shaking. 

“Yes.”

Oh, no. 

“Alex, listen,” Lena starts and Supergirl looks at her—no, not Supergirl, Kara—Kara looks at her and Lena sends her a reassuring gaze that screams, ‘I’m with you.’

In that instant it must’ve looked like a switch had been flipped. From Lena attacking Kara to Lena defending Kara in a split second. 

“Listen, we were going to tell you. It isn’t like what you think—“

“Oh, no no,” Alex quickly dismisses Lena, “I’m not going to listen to you. This is between me and you,” Alex hissed not even looking at her, directly glaring at Supergirl instead. 

“Alex, just—” Lena tries but she does the mistake of moving her shoulder in an attempt to put an arm on Alex and she cuts off with a, “Fuck.”

The Danvers sisters look up at her yelp of pain, concern flickering through their faces. Supergirl swiftly speeding to her side, and the shoulder wound she was so trying so hard to keep Kara from seeing, is now out in the open, bleeding profusely. 

“You’re hurt.”

“Fuck,” Lena says again as she tries to take in a breath, pain shooting down her entire right side. 

“Take her to the Med Bay,” Alex orders, eyes briefly tracing Lena’s shoulder before turning to Supergirl again, “If you think this discussion is over, you’re sorely mistaken. You and I have a lot to talk about. And I fucking mean it.”

Lena watches as Supergirl swallows in fear at the sight of the DEO director walking out. 

“Everybody, back to work! Show’s over, morons!”

As if somebody had hit the play button, a buzz resumes almost exaggeratedly; DEO agents immediately flailing to get back to work, embarrassed at being called out so blatantly. 

Lena tunes back in to Kara, “C’mon, hold on to me,” she mumbles, quickly bending down to put an arm around Lena’s knees and pulls her to a bridal carry. 

She doesn’t point out that it’s her shoulder that was injured, not her legs; doesn’t point out that she can walk absolutely fine. Lena can clearly see how Supergirl needs to be as close to her as possible right now. 

So, she clings tightly and presses harder back against her chest.

*** 

Lena’s mind is running a mile a minute right now, she needs to know what’s going in her wife’s mind and she needs a plan on how the both of them are going to do damage control. 

Kara lays her down softly on a Med bed and without a word Lena strips herself off. 

Both of them silent as Kara gets supplies on a nearby table. She sits behind Lena and cleans the wound wordlessly. She’s patched Nia up in secret, way too many times, to know how many stitches Lena needs.

“I’m still mad at you.”

Are the first words that Kara utters.

“Good. I’m still mad at you too.”

She hears Kara sigh and she doesn’t need to turn around to know that Kara’s face is scrunched up in a pout and a crinkle. 

“But...that doesn’t mean I won’t protect you against Alex.”

“I don’t need protection from Alex.”

“Really?”

“Okay, fine she scared me a bit.”

Before Lena can reply she hisses in pain and Kara brings her lips near the wound and “Sorry,” she whispers. 

“We have to talk about this don’t we?” Kara sighs out, finally addressing the elephant in the room.

“Yes, darling, we do.”

“We also have to reach a compromise about this, don’t we?”

“Yeah, Kara, yeah we do.”

Lena hears another sigh and she can guess what Kara would say next.

“Just so you know, I hate this. I hate this very much. If I could have my way, we’re not having this discussion and you’re staying put and staying safe and not running off to danger. Hell if I can have it my way you won’t even be stepping inside the DEO. But...I can’t have my way can’t I?”

“No, darling, I’m sorry.”

Kara sounds so helpless and Lena just wants to make all the complications in their relationship go away. But that’s not how real life relationships work. Relationships are hard and messy and work. God, they are so much work, but being with Kara is worth all the work in the world. They’ve come a long, long way for this. 

If this had happened two years ago, the both of them would not even think about compromise. Kara would just push through with what she believes is the best way to keep Lena safe and would have insisted on keeping Lena locked in a safe house somewhere. And she guesses past Lena wouldn’t even consider the merits of communication with Kara, either.

“I just want you safe.”

“I know.”

“Never want to see you hurt.”

“I know, baby. But Kara you can’t always keep me safe, do you understand that?” Lena says carefully, she wishes she could turn around right now and cup Kara’s face.

“I know it’s hard for you, but this is what the both of us signed up for. Do you think I’m happy whenever you fly off to God knows where, when I see getting shot at in the news, when you leave in the middle of the night? I’m just as scared as you are, Kara.”

But that’s the price the both of them have to pay for falling in love when one is a super hero and the other is a world saving genius.

Kara bandages her neatly and Lena turns around to face her, moving a bit up in the bed and pulls gently at Kara’s wrist to join her.

“I know,” Kara breathes into Lena’s hair as she positions herself,  “I’m sorry. For fighting, for yelling, for...accidentally telling everyone that we’re married.”

Lena tries not to laugh at how Kara pouts at the last one. 

“Forgiven already. I’m sorry too.”

“I love you, you know that?”

She feels more that hears as she fits herself underneath Kara’s chin, tucked tight beside her. 

“I love you too, so, so much. So much that I agreed to a secret wedding,” Lena tells her, “And as much as I would love to continue our little heart to heart, I really think you should go to your sister now.”

“Nooo, Lena noo,” Kara groans out, “Come on, we can just stay here and cuddle and I can kiss your shoulder better and maybe you can give me a kiss too and I don’t have to talk to Alex.”

“Oh, but you do.”

“Have I mentioned I also hate when you’re right?”

“Once or twice.”

“Mmph. Fine. But half an hour of cuddles first and then I go talk to Alex, deal?” 

“Deal.” 

Lena agrees, greedy for Kara’s warmth and also thinking that Alex certainly needs more than half an hour to cool off. Kara certainly needs more than that to think about the words she’s going to tell her sister. She’ll probably die by the end of their conversation but at least she died knowing that the whole world knows Lena Luthor is her wife, right?

***

“Alex, I know you’re mad-”

“Oh, I’m not mad, I’m livid, Kara. Livid.”

Maybe it was a bad idea to talk to Alex in an empty DEO training room where her sister could easily turn on red sunlamps and deck her for keeping things secret.

“What, did it not occur to that, oh I don’t know? ‘Oh I’m having a wedding maybe I should text my sister an update? Leave her a note maybe? Dear Alex I’m getting married today!’” Alex roars and Kara flinches. Rao how could she be this stupid?

“Anything would have been fucking nice, than to hear about it in the middle of a heated fight. Tell me, if you didn’t slip up just now were you even going to tell me?” Alex tries to coat the words in anger but she doesn’t miss the way it wavers on fear and insecurity.

“Rao, yes of course I was going to Alex! I- we-” Kara tries.

“Save it.”

“Alex please,” She begs her to listen as she steps in front of her and reaches to hold Alex’s hands.

“When?” Alex snarls and Kara gulps because her sister definitely would not like the answer.

“Remember that time that Lena and I broke up? Then we ran to each other in the rain, made up? And then two weeks later she got assassinated by those CADMUS wanna-be’s and we had to use the Fortress’s tech to track her down?”

Alex remembers that one so clearly. It was funny at the time, how Jess had caught them making out in the middle of an ‘interview’. How Kara was so happy that she won Lena back.

“Yes and?” Alex quips, eager to know the answer.

“And well, remember how I asked to have some time alone with Lena once we rescued her? And made all of you guys leave?” Kara croaks out, fear apparent and Alex just stares at her clearly impatient at how Kara rambles.

“Well, I uh-kinda suggested we get married on the spot because I didn’t want to spend another day not being married to her when people want to kill both of us, every day.”

Alex lets out a heavy, shakes her head and pinches the bridge of her nose. 

“You know this is the part where I say, ‘Not even surprised.’” She states dryly, “Of fucking course you’re the kind of people who would pull this kind of shit.”

 Kara tries to get a word in but, “You fucking owe me a wedding and Mom and J’onn and Alura-”

“Oh my god! Kara! Your Mom deserves to see the daughter she whisked off to another planet, get married! You fucking owe Clark a wedding-”

“Actually…” Kara starts off sheepishly, knowing full well Alex will explode from what she’s about to say.

“Oh for fuck’s sake! Clark knows doesn’t he?!”

Kara flinches again. Good thing her superhearing is dampened here. 

“Well, uh,” Kara wrings her fingers when she realizes there are no glasses to fiddle with.

“Lena said she wanted a Kryptonian wedding so we had Kelex call Kal and uhm he officiated…”

Alex doesn’t say anything to that, just clenches and unclenches fists at her side. 

“I’m sorry!! Okay! I was going to tell you immediately but we kinda got carried away sneaking around and then it just completely slipped my mind because you guys keep pointing out how we’re an old married couple anyway! And and and—“ Kara is grasping for words, anything just to make this all better. 

“Damn it, I messed up haven’t I?” She whispers, realizing  now that the only thing to make this better would be them admitting their mistake and going for amends. 

“Yeah, you did, Kara.”

Kara feels shame course through her.

“I am so mad at you right now for denying me the privilege of seeing you walk down the aisle.  You know I don’t even want that, I just wanted to see you have your dreams come true and see you have what I have with Kelly, god damn it Kara, I love you and I wanted to be there.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I hate your pout. I hate your stupid pouty face. Your billionaire wife better pay for a grand wedding for all of us.”

“Does that mean I’m forgiven?”

“Mom’s not going to let you down easy though.”

Her sister doesn’t really need to point out the obvious.

“I know. Could you maybe be the-”

“Nuh-uh. No. You tell her yourself or have Lena tell her. I’m not doing that shit for you.”

“Fine.”

Kara will take what she can get. 

“I love you, Alex.” She breathes in relief when she sees Alex affectionately roll her eyes at her.

“I love you too, you stupid alien.”

***

“It’s official then? We guys get to call you Moms now?”

Lena never really expected that to be the first words Nia says to her when she enters the Med Bay.

“Yes, Nia. And also, yes, you’re a bridesmaid,” She answers immediately knowing that Nia was going to ask.

Nia lights up and Lena shakes her head at how similar she and Kara beams. 

Yeah, ‘Moms’ really is a fitting term.

“Alex making you do another wedding huh?”

“Yes, she is.”

Nia snorts, “You say that as if you don’t want the world to know Kara Danvers is wholly and solely yours.”

Well, she isn’t wrong, not that Lena is ever going to admit that though.

“Can I please plan your wedding? I have prophetic dreams. I can totally tell you what would look perfect on that day oh, oh, oh! I can even tell you if it’s going to rain, if you want an outdoor wedding that is. Oooh, maybe I could even see who’d catch your bouquet— “

“Nia, slow down,” Lena mutters before Nia plans out the whole wedding then and there.

“Kara and I will talk about it, but I think she’ll agree, you don’t really need to convince us.”

“Yes-yeah uh right sorry, you should definitely do that. Sorry it’s just I’ve been shipping you and oh my this is so exciting!” 

Trust Nia to say ship is now endgame in regards to their marriage.

Nia jabbers on as Kara walks in and gives the both of them a big grin, Alex trailing behind her. 

“I guess, congratulations are in order, Danvers.” Alex rolls her eyes and it takes Lena a moment to realize that she was referring to her.

She tries to calm down the happy flutter in her heart and the emotions bubbling out of her as she utters a weak, “Th-thank you, Alex.”

“Actually, Luthor-Danvers, we hyphenated,” Kara clarifies, which really doesn’t help the happy flutter at all, just adds to it. 

Alex just sighs and mumbles an ‘Of course you did.’

Before walking towards the bed and surprising Lena with a tight embrace.

“You do know, now you have two Danvers worrying for you every time you walk out in the field now, right?”

 And Lena just laughs. Because for the first time in forever she’s got people genuinely wanting her to exist. To the point that they’d do anything to keep her safe. 

She’s got family now and if it means overprotective Kryptonians and fierce blaster wielding older sisters, she really wouldn’t have it any other way. 

***

They’re fighting. 

In the DEO.

Again. 

“Moms fighting again?” Nia doesn’t really know why she keeps asking, this is like a daily occurrence now. Agents don’t even bat an eye when bickering echoes off the halls, nowadays. Apparently, this is what happens in the CatCo bullpen and L-Corp offices too. 

Alex appears next to her. 

“You know you really should stop calling them that, especially since—“

“WE ARE NOT NAMING OUR KID, POTSTICKERS!”

#the idea of them secretly getting married is just so funny to me #and kara accidentally telling everyone is even funnier #i guess to those people asking for a follow up to the magazine story uh this is it guys... #they get married in secret and then they get married again and they bicker a lot but they love each other a lot too #hope u guys liked that #happy valentines! #supercorp endgame! #the reckless writer writes #a supercorp fic #of sorts #rcklss writes

[mammonsvulva]

Hi there! I just discovered your page and i loved the bachata headcannon!

On that same line, can you do a female latina headcannon? Like, more specifically, Colombian, you know, an MC that's like normally fluent in english but when mad she just burst on angry spanish screaming session with latin curses and a strong accent and also just getting really mad if deemed as Mexican by default? I'd love that! Thank youuuu (also feel free to ignored this if it's not of your fancy)

I hope you have a great day!

Of course! I really hope you like it! :)

(I tried to incorporate things some of my relatives say as Colombians please don’t hate me🥲)

The Brothers + Datables and a Latina MC with Colombian Habits

Lucifer❤️

Lucifer has always been amused by the boldness MC portrayed, that is until Mammon pissed her off

MC actually f*cking explodes, calling Mammon “culicagao” (like a bratty kid) and a bunch of profanities out of rage

Actually leaves Lucifer surprised, who could she hate so much that she’d put a curse on them?

Is actually kind of scared to speak up after she went silent, kinda just stares at her like “what the fuck do I do”

“I’ve told Mammon A THOUSAND TIMES. IM NOT F*CKING MEXICAN”

(Oooohh Mammons gonna get his ASS WHOOPED)

“MAAAAAAMMMMOOOOONNN????”

Mammon💛

Could learn a thing or two from MC, had some strong clap backs

Is counting his money when OUT OF NOWHERE MC just starts incanting a literal curse

Literally has his quaking in his boots dude, like he’s genuinely terrified

He can’t keep up with anything she’s saying and feels like his time to die has come

Doesn’t say A WORD when she calms down, jumps when she starts apologizing for reacting like that

“W-w-what happened? ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )”

“I LOST 10 GRAND IN BLACK JACK! ITS FUCKING RIGGED!”

Is genuinely more cautious for a while, kind of traumatized him

Mammon thought it’d be a great Idea to take her to meet one of his witches, MC already didn’t like her but listen to this

First thing the witch said was “Aren’t you that Mexican transfer student or whatever?”

(‘Oooh Ms. Girl you fucked up’)

Leviathan💙

Wishes he could have MCs confidence, ‘how does she respond like that 0•0’

He’s reading Manga while MC just lost on the same level for the 5th time

Accidentally shifts to his demon for he got so scared

Has to whip his tail up and grab the controller before she could slam it, genuinely terrified for his well being

Once she calms down she goes to give him a hug, to help with her frustration

*PANICS* “I-I can h-help you with that level, if y-you want..”

MC watches as he beats it with ease and heaves a sigh of relief, literally such a stupid game

Gets just as offended as MC when somebody said “I went to Mexico on vacation once, what was it like growing up there?”

Will let her handle it and he’ll be her Moral Support <3

Satan💚

Loved that MC was always ready, he was like that too being the Avatar of Wrath

Is genuinely amused when MC burst out swearing because she got a bad grade, he actually thought it was hilarious

Thinks of like a game to keep up with everything she’s shouting, makes her more upset

“What the fuck are you laughing at juemadre de la-“

“You’re Hot when you’re mad, Did you know that?”

Makes her go silent immediately, why is he like this, making people wanna act up on DIAVOLO

When they’re BOTH mad at something it’s like a f*cking BOMB RAID bro

They both just keep adding more, even when Satans speaking a Demon Dialect and MC is speaking Spanish LMAOO

When an arrogant soul decides to purposely mislabel MC as Mexican, the fool needs to count his seconds with MC and Satan both getting on his ass

Asmodeus💞

Has always liked the spunk MC had, it entertained him to watch her bicker with his brothers

Surprised, but not happy AT ALL with the fact that MC could blow up like that

Gets on MC for lashing out, “MC! THIS IS TERRIBLE FOR YOUR SKIN, DO YOU WANT WRINKLES?”

Gets MC to tell him what made her loose her cool like that

“That stupid b*tch from class posted saying “That Mexican transfer student isn’t pretty enough to be this annoying”

Almost explodes as bad as MC did

“MS. GIRL SHE SAID WHAT? Lemme hop on Devilgram and end her career real quick💖”

Devilgram post- Asmodeus 19:34: “Aw sweetie, Not everybody can be as gorgeous as MC and muah, but don’t go trying to drag her in the dirt with you. Filthy🥱”

No mercy on the haters💔

Beelzebub🧡

Like Asmo, found it entertaining to see MC bicker with his brothers every now and then

MC just couldn’t keep calm anymore when she messed up the recipe she was working on AGAIN

Beel becomes more concerned than scared, ‘Is she ok? :(‘

Gets up to hug MC, hoping it’ll help calm her down a bit

She explains that she kept ruining the dessert no matter how hard she tried

“MC, it’s ok to do it wrong, because it helps you learn how to do it right :)”

She’s tried again, except this time with Beel to help her :)

Gets upset when someone defaults MC as Mexican, knowing how much she hates it

He may be a teddy bear but man don’t f*ck with his Chef

Belphegor💜

Thought MC was amusing with the way she made sure everyone knew she wouldn’t take any BS

MC just happened to stub her toe while Belphie was sleeping, and now he’s awake, and heated

“What the f*ck happened?”

Is actually more concerned than upset, she wouldn’t lash out like that for no reason

When MC explains that a picture of her in the RAD Catalog still ended up being there even though she made it clear she was against it

“Oh, MC- you look good in every photo, I wouldn’t be upset about it”

Assures her it’s not a big deal and then invites her to come take a nap with him

Will mean mug the f*ck out of anyone who assumes MC is Mexican, because he finds extremely disrespectful (as it is)

Might commit homicide if they keep saying Mexican but I ain’t no snitch

+

Diavolo♥️

At first took MC as disrespectful, but learned it was only when she felt she was being disrespected (then by all means, go off)

Surprisingly, Diavolo speaks Spanish, but he still kind of struggles to keep up

He’s just laughing the whole time too, like MC isn’t furious

Later, MC calmly explains just some random student pissed her off again

“Who is this student you say? Do I need to have a chat with them as the Demon Lord of The Devildom? :)?”

Dia actually admires how passionate MC is about her home country, agrees that it’s disrespectful to mislabel someone

Because he can, Dia starts to learn about Colombian culture and throwing parties just for MC

Starts saying shit like “politas pa la rumba!” (I’ll buy beers for everyone¿) just to sound cool to MC

Barbatos💟

Barb doesn’t understand how someone could be so beautiful but so hostile sometimes, overall doesn’t really mind though

Is surprised that such things could conde from MC, kind of chuckles thinking about it

He figured he should try and step in to calm the situation

“Is there anything I can do to ease you, MC?”

It ended up being that Diavolo was completely ignoring her and brushing her aside when he never did that with Solomon

Asks if she’d like him to talk to Dia about it, since he may approach it better than she will

Barb will quietly correct anybody who believes her to be Mexican, just so MC won’t have to deal with their arrogance herself

Takes his free time and makes dishes from Colombia, or Colombian themed cookies or cupcakes to make MC happy :)

Simeon🤍

Is trying to teach MC better ways to respond to idiots, more Angelic ways

When MC blows up for the first time in front of him, the literal shock she sent him into omfg

*GASP* “MC?! WHY ARE YOU SAYING SUCH VILE THINGS?”

Like, HELLOOO? SHE DARES TO SAY SUCH THINGS IN AN ANGELS PRESENCE?

Helps to calm her down after showing distaste for her words

“You’re lips are to beautiful to speak such sinful things”

Will go on to give MC a long but kind lecture about why exploding like that is bad for her Aura and whatever

Will politely make it known that someone was wrong for assuming MC is Mexican, does get a bit irritated though

He now goes up to MC when she’s getting upset, to remind her to breathe and comfort her with a deep hug :)

“See? It’s ok MC~ just breathe in and out for me, ok? :)”

Solomon⚛️

Will piss MC off on purpose just to see her pop off, he LOVES it

Literally her #1 cheerleader when she blows up, adding on to what she’s upset about

“Period MC” “No way she said that! What a fugly b*tch” “Right, she’s just a hater”

Hypes her up all the time, even when she’s obviously in the wrong

Sol needs ALL the tea, pulls up like “who we talking shit about?”

Will get on someone’s ass just because, now think about when someone mislabels MC😳💥

Gives MC a sense of pride hearing him say “Cagué” when he messes up a potion, he obviously picked that up from her

Luke⛅️

Gets kinda (really) scared when MC becomes a little aggressive

Actually bursts out crying because he was scared MC was mas at him

MC traumatized this kid so bad, he ran to Simeon like he was getting chased be some demons

“M-m-mom is really m-mad and *sobs* I’m s-scared *sobs more*”

MC IMMEDIATELY feels super bad because she scared away his soul

Simeon, having talked to her about it already, mouthed “Apologize now.” In a very not polite manner, kinda scaring MC too🚫🧢

Has MC apologizing PROFUSELY, trying to explain it wasn’t Luke’s fault

Once he calms down, they go to bake cookies like usual, except this time he’s sniffing the whole time :( 💔

I really hope this fit what you asked for :( </3

#obey me headcanons #obey me #om! #shall we date #swd mc #obey me lucifer #shall we date lucifer #obey me mammon #shall we date mammon #obey me leviathan #shall we date leviathan #obey me satan #shall we date satan #obey me asmodeus #shall we date asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #shall we date beelzebub #obey me belphegor #shall we date belphegor #obey me diavolo #shall we date diavolo #obey me barbatos #shall we date barbatos #obey me side characters #obey me simeon #shall we date simeon #obey me solomon #shall we date solomon #obey me luke #shall we date luke

[anxiousgaypanicking]

okay so i recently watched the metal family (the english dub) on youtube and i sent my friend a ton of information on it - my thoughts, my theories, etc, and then i thought of a sanders sides related universe for it 

technically some things differ, as in the part i wrote glam and chive (who ive assigned to logan and remus) eventually end up together, but whatever 

and, because im a whore for attention im going to post here exactly what i rambled about because i was spilling out thoughts that just made my heart beat faster. so basically, the metal family: sanders sides edition 

spoilers for the metal family. 

basically i was thinking of logan and remus basically as these two characters, with logan as glam/sebastian and remus as chive, and logans parents putting a lot of pressure on him as their only child, and his dad is suffering abuse to so he cant even stick up for logan, and when he does bad he has to put out his arm and roll his sleeve up and his moms hits it repeatedly, and in the show glam doesnt react until he showers bc thats when it stings (until a certain scene where glams dad slaps it so hard he fucking bleeds a lot and starts sobbing and its like part of when he snapped) but thats probably what he does, and obviously the butler also gets mad and snaps on him a lot too, but when he goes to that music exam and gets second place to remus (who he met briefly on the way to the music exam - youll understand this more if you end up watching the series), hes shocked, and as remus walks him home he explains what he did on the guitar, and gives him the bach vinyl and logan squints but takes it anyway, and when he announces he got second he gets scolded, they mock him for who he lost too, and the back vinyl is taken by his mother, hes scolded for thinking he could ever be on par (logan plays the violen btw - he entered the music exam with a violen and its what his mouther abuses him for when he plays wrong or doesnt answer right/right away to note related questions) with bach, and then hes hit with the ruler and sent back to his room, where he plays the bach vinyl thinking it will be bach but then its metal and it sort of awakens something in logan and he sort of snaps

when he runs into remus again remus offers to teach him, steals an amp and guitar from the observatory, and then when he goes home then this is where hes hit until his forearm is literally dripping with blood and hes sobbing, but sort of that unhinged sort of sobbing where hes like :) while sobbing and bleeding, and his mom is saying hes no longer allowed to take walks because he was late, went through the park, ran in a suit, etc, and how logan will be studying with her daily from now on, and through gritted teeth, a sob, and a smile, as he clutches his bloody wrist hes like "yes mother, ill study under you every day. every day. every day." and he and remus had luckily agreed already to meet by the dumpster at midnight, and thats what they start doing

remus teaches him how to play, and logan literally gets no fucking sleep and becomes more and more sleep deprived as hes taught more and more and it makes him more and more manic and unhinged, and he has periods where he fucking snaps and can play the bass super well because hes fueling his anger and his trauma into how aggressively he plays and is actually super good, and eventually he and remus get a gig with these two other bandmates 

and that happens to be the day that the way he hides his diary (where he gets out his murderous thoughts over his father, writes about lying to him, and writes down notes for music he wants to make) and his model of the city (which hed spent a lot of time on and cared about a lot and made out of every day things like lightbulbs and pencil shavers and had to keep hidden) were revealed and his mother found them, and she threw it into the trash where logan saw it crumbled as he walked home in the rain, and while his mother is aggressively shouting at him she says something along the lines of "who are you going to choose. your family, or some vagrants!?" and logan sort of snaps, goes wide eyed, and walks the other way, despite the fact its rianing and his mother demands him to come back, and then starst screaming about how if he ever comes back to the door hell never be allowed back inside, and thats where that episode ends

and basically i was thinking that logan leaves, and sort of walks around in his suit with his violen for a while, before he goes back to the alley where he hides his guitar that remus stole for him and his punk clothes, and he grabs them both and sort of mindlessly wanders until he ends up back in front of remuss trailer

when logan shows up remus doesnt realize until he opens the door of his trailer and prepares to leave and logans just standing there staring, utterly soaked, and he craves his neck up when remus walks out and remus is like "holy shit dude, you scared me. its not even midnight here. how long have you been here?" and logan doesnt answer, and hess not used to tocuhing people or being touched gently, but he sort of falls into remus, and collapses against him, and he starts sobbing because he just lost his family, and he left his dad all alone, but ehs finally free from the abuse, and hes so tired and so confused and hes never felt so unsure of his next move but remus just pulls him inside, brings his stuff inside, they step over his sleeping and drunk parent, and remus takes logan to his room (possibly the one he shares with roman ?) and basically just hugs logan as he sobs and cries and eventually passes out against him because hes literally so fucking sleep deprived, and remus takes liberty to change logan out of his sopping wet clothes, but then both of logans arms are covered in scars, some of them still scabbed, and remus is immediately concerned but he decides hell ask about it when logan wakes up, and basically ust goes out and shoplifts some food or steals from his parent to buy shit, and when logan wakes up hes given low quality food that he accepts gratefully, apologizes for showing up unceremoniously and being so informal, but remus just hesitantly wraps an arm around him, and logan accepts it, and remus says its fine while cuddling with him and then again hesitantly asks what happened

and logan sort of goes silent and doesnt talk about it, but clears his throat and asks if its okay he stays here, and theres already three people living in this trailer so he feels bad for asking, but remus just pulls him closer and is like "yeah man! of course you can stay!" because obviously hes not going to tell logan no after what he just pulled, so he lets logan stay, and remus and roman bicker for it a bit when logan uses their small ass bathroom to shower, and by the end remus has basically bribed roman into going along with it

and logan has to adjust to not being a wealthy - althought not spoiled - person anymore, and sometimes he reacts to things on instinct. he breaks something and remus comes up behind him and asks what happened and logan just sort of stares straight ahead, rolls up his sleeve, and sticks out his arm, and remus is like  logan?? and it takes logan a few seconds to snap out of it and he sort of gazes at remus, goes wide eyed, and then apologizes as he brings his arm back in and rolls down his sleeve, and he seems really awkward but also quite relieved, and remus has never hurt him before, but it was just sort of that reactive thing, and that happens to be the day where remus decides to ask what those scars are, and asks to finally treat them properly because he hears logans whimpers and hisses in the shower

he and roman have their fair share of scars from their own shitty drunk parent, so they know pretty damn well how to take care of them, and how to steal bandages and shit, so remus helps clean them out and up while logan sort of quietly tells remus all about his life, why the music exam was such a big deal, and how remus basically changed his life, and how hes still confused and doesnt know if he made the right decision, and remus doesnt respond until the end where he bandages up logans arms and then gently grabs his hand and tells logan that hes safe now, and that being surronded by people who only put you down and more so hurt you isnt good, and that he believes logan made the right decision because hes safe here with them (the twins make sure to keep him guarded from the drunk parent) and roman seconds that from his spot on the bed, and so logan tries to put his past behind him and instead focus on playing music with remus, and playing shows at bars and stuff where they slowly gain a larger and larger fan base, and they make more and more money from the awesome music they play, and eventually use that money to buy their own house

i know its a lot, but just imagine. imagine

#tw abuse #cw abuse #tw blood #cw blood #cw alcohol #tw alcohol #basically a big tw #sanders sides au #sanders sides #intrulogical #sanders sides angst #potential roceit #roceit #metal family #the metal family #mfssau #i know its a lot #but im so hyped #might write something with this

[icecoffeesimpwriting]

Hey so I was thinking. Super angsty Edward x reader where the reader is upset about how he up and left like in new moon. we still go to volterra to save him, right? but as soon as he's safe you walk away. you're like "my work here is done" and eddy boi is like "what? you don't want me?" and you argue bc he's a dumb boy who you can't trust? I know you wanna see eddy boi get his feelings hurt. I support this, so hurt. his. feelings. i guess you can end it fluffy and cute too if you want :* <3

OHHHHH I LOVE HURTNG PEOPLE’S FEELINGS NGL I MIGHT MAKE MYSELF CRY WRITING THIS ALSO WARNING IM CALLING OUT ON SOME OF THE TOXICNESS I SAW WITHIN EDWARD IN THE MOVIES

Edward Cullen x Reader but plot twist the reader ends up someone else 

~When Edward left you felt so broken and betrayed he had left to protect you but that didn’t make any sense 

~You had given him everything, you stopped hanging out with the wolves it hurt but you had still texted them without him knowing, the wolves were pissed they saw how toxic Edward was and they knew he had under his thumb but still it wasn’t healthy for you

~After staying in your room and thinking about what had happened you had locked yourself away from the world just needing time to think 

“Hey dumbass open your door”

“Go away”

“Y/n open this door or I’ll break it down you know I will”

~The voice of Leah was behind your door you knew she would keep her word and so you got out of your bundle of blankets and opened the door Leah came and looked around there were cups and plates around your room 

“Damn it Y/n come on go take a shower I could smell you outside your house”

“Leah, fuck off”

“Hey you shut the hell up go shower and get ready we got somewhere to be”

“What the hell are you talking about Clearwater?”

“You need to get soooo me and you are going to go have fun and then hang out with the pack at Mom’s house plus they miss you”

~You huffed and did what as she said the shower had felt good and getting out and brushing your teeth for the first time in a while felt even better.

~When you got back into your room you saw that all the dishes and trash were picked up as well as your bed being made,

~You knew Leah had done it she always looked out for you when life was kicking your ass, you had gotten dressed and done your usual routine coming down stairs to see Leah waiting 

“You ready slow ass?”

“Clearwater shut up”

~You two stared at each other and then busted out laughing you had forgotten how easy it was to talk to Leah unlike the Cullen’s you felt like you didn’t have to hold back the Cullen’s were nice and had their fun moments but most of the time you felt like you were stiff around them

~You two walked out and got into Leah’s truck as you drove around town just talking and catching up you felt emotions stir inside of you, you had feeling for Leah before you met Edward but you always pushed them away scared that she didn’t feel the same and when you met Edward it made the feelings disappear slowly but they were still there and now seeing her and talking you made you remember them and they were just as strong maybe stronger than what you felt for Edward

~As you drove around you stopped at little coffee shop in town you had came here with Leah a lot but when you dated Edward you had stopped going it felt wrong to go without her as you two pulled in you felt your mouth thinking about the amazing drinks and cakes they had when you two had placed your order you two had sat down and talked,

“So about Edward”

“What about him Leah?”

“I know you don’t want to hear this but Y/n listen to me he wasn’t good to you he was toxic and kept you away from us”

“Leah please”

“No listen, please Y/n we’ve known each other for years I know you and when you dated Edward you were not you. You were stiff and kept in a cage basically he kept you away from us”

“Leah,,,”

“You know I’m right Y/n”

~You felt like crying she was right and you hated it you hated knowing she was right Edward had kept in you in cage and hearing her say made reality hit you felt the tears spill over

~Leah reached over and grabbed your hand took you outside when outside Leah wrapped her arms around you holding you as you cried 

“Y/n listen to me I know it’s hard and I want better for you I wished you could see it someone out there could love you and give you what you need, I could- I mean someone else could give you that”

~Wait what had Leah just almost confessed?

“Leah did you just say you could be that person?”

“Y/n I’m sorry I know you don’t like me like that but I-”

~You kissed her you wrapped your arms around her and kissed her

“Leah Clearwater I love you, I loved you before Edward and I was so scared that you didn’t feel the same and when I felt some feelings for him and started dating him the feelings were still there and then he took me away from you and that hurt more than anything”

“Y/n you’re a dumbass”

“Huh? I just confessed to you and you me a dumbass?! What the fuck Leah?!”

“Listen L/n I called you a dumbass for thinking a a vampire could replace me I love you more than anything but damn you think someone could replace me?”

“Pftttt Leah shut up and kiss me again”

~And she did it felt right and better than it ever did with Edward it felt passionate and warm and loving

“Alright we gotta go or else the pack will be mad at us”

 ~When you had gotten to the house the pack welcomed you back and they were happy to you and Leah together finally Seth had joked around that if he had to hear Leah talk about you again he would fling himself off a building and Embry jumped in and soon the rest did too all joking and picking at you two Leah was to happy to care at the moment but then when she took you home things changed

~Leah stood on guard in front of you 

“Wait there’s someone in your house”

~The said person came out and there stood Alice with a shocked look on her face

“Alice what are you doing here?”

“What I am doing here is seeing what you are doing, why are with the wolves?”

“Why do you care?”

“Y/n please Edward is going to Italy to see the Volturi he wants to kill himself”

“What?! Why?!”

“I saw you get into a car with someone and get hurt and a bunch of other things and Edward saw thinking you were dead”

“Shit, Alice we have to do something”

“Wait Y/n don’t this isn’t your problem”

“Stay out of this wolf this none of your business”

“It actually is my business cold one me and Y/n are in a relationship now”

“What, Y/n tell me it isn’t true?”

“Yes Alice we made it official tonight I love Leah and I always have even with Edward and no offense but your brother is an asshole and treated me like shit! He kept me away from my friends and that’s not healthy! Leah has always treated me good I will go with you to save Edward but then I’m done I don’t care anymore I’m happy now and it took me being treated like shit from your brother to realize that Leah will always be the only one for me”

“Y/n,, I had no idea I’m sorry okay let’s go”

“Alright but Leah’s coming with us and don’t try to argue with me”

“Damn right I’m coming”

~When you two had made it there you and Leah had raced out of the car towards Edward Leah using her nose to help you to him you had finally found him and when you did he was about to step out into the sun you tackled him just in time.

“EDWARD DONT”

“Y/n you’re okay, you’re alive”

“Yeah no thanks to you”

“What?”

~You stepped away from him went back to Leah back to where you belonged

“Y/n why is she here?”

“Because Edward I’ve moved on I came here to save your sorry ass and now I’m going back to Leah and the pack I’m sorry but we weren’t good together you treated me bad and kept me from my friends I’m sorry but I can’t do this anymore I’m going back to Forks with Leah and I’m going to forget about you”

“Y/n please”

“Please nothing goodbye Edward I hope you treat partner better than you did me”

~When you two left you felt no guilt you were with the love of your life and and were finally happy and that’s how it should be

~fin~

#edward cullen #edward cullen x reader #leah clearwater #leah clearwater x reader

[lover-of-trash-and-people]

bittersweet netflix shadow and bone finale (s1 e8) rewatch; accoutrement: white wine with ice cubes in it (no YOU'RE a mom drink shh)

my wine's like fruity I love her

light and darkness title card we love to see it

Inej looking at Alina before she goes below deck to hide <3

okay that 'what can you really do on your own' was like not fun that shit hurted

okay but Jesper's 'not enough'? <3

oh no my baby Zoya's first inkling that Darkles does not really care

omg Helnik just appeared and I remembered how much heartbreak I have to face in this episode

gods I love Danielle as Nina so so much

'this can't be it' said she with her pleading smile with downturned eyebrows MA'AM I-

don't break my dumb little heart

I might hate Calahan's little accent but they're making me tear up

oh gods I literally cannot keep a hold on myself when Dani's accent bleeds through with full force, it's like she comes more alive or smth

'I will keep you warm' SIR WHAT-

I am surprised they showed a leaning in for a kiss so soon but I'm not mad about it

her little eyebrow twitch at 'what are waffles'

when that rando said 'i hunt slavers now' a dread settled into me because I knew what was about to go down

Matthias looking somberly at the stuffed wolf's head </3

I am so incredibly entranced by this exchange between Fedyor and Nina and what it represents, it's very interesting that they pushed up their storyline to match with the timeline

damn it's kind of jarring to be back in the Fold

'REMEMBER WHO'S DRIVING'??!!!! *you better stop* meme, *i am, disgusted* meme, *oh wow, oh wow* meme

Mal you fucking idiot you could never take the crows by surprise

the music rising as Kaz starts explaining his thought process, fucking perfection

haha Mal bitchass Inej caught you

'Because if he isn't with Kirigan's crew, he's with ours' WHEN I TELL YOU I SCREAMED

'And why would we destroy the Fold? It's the greatest weapon we've got' valid point at the moment but you know I don't necessarily agree with your methods

the use of the light tunnel in the show instead of Alina just being a super flashlight in the books is quite an interesting addition as well

is this an inappropriate time to point out how pretty Ben Barnes is

okay I kind of love the depiction of the shadow powers okay sue me

'they are traitors who tried to kill you' why are you suddenly making valid points despite having kind of committed low scale genocide

'i never said I was smart' YES MAL BE THE VOICE OF HIMBOS EVERYWHERE

Kaz's face going from 'can you believe this idiot' at Mal to 'fuck me I'm gonna do the same thing aren't I' at Inej

'For who would oppose us now?' *himbo romantic rival appears out of nowhere and shoots at him* god I love this show

him standing calmly in his ridiculous all black attire after nodding at his soldier to stop the himbo in his tracks, i fucking can't

could she summon light without the Darkling making her after he put the collar on her until the uhm moment in the books? idts but in the show she can hmm

'only because I'm not in the game' you tell him Jesper

not me snickering at 'you'll be seen not as a saviour, but as a heretic' LMFAO

'Shame. I'll have to give that speech again now.' THIS SHOW IS A FUCKING COMEDY AND YOU CAN'T PROVE ME WRONG

YES LET'S FUCKING GO SULI SOLIDARITY

Darkles casually whipping the Cut out like a shuriken or a throwing knife at Jesper because he shot at him lmao I can't

INEJ FUCKING GHAFA STABBED ONE THE OLDEST AND MOST POWERFUL PEOPLE IN THAT WORLD AND THAT IS VERY TELLING OF HER POWER

that moment where you actually think that affected him despite having read the books and watched the show

and then he has to go and fucking say 'it will take more than this' and I can't be help but be a little bit impressed at this old fool's resilience

throwback to when he said 'the king is a child' sir you make some valid points sometimes and it does make it difficult to hate you

I would just like to inform everyone that it is currently 6:09 am IST and I am sipping my second mug of wine while watching netflix sab for the second time instead of doing my three papers that are due tomorrow

I'm sorry but Inej jumping to check on Zoya after she gets knocked over by the volcra? first class display of solidarity and sisterhood as well as Inej's inherent kindness

Kaz jumping in front of a FUCKING VOLCRA AND STABBING IT WITH HIS CANE to save Inej, you best believe love is true, kids

god the volcra are so ugly and gross, they did such a good job with them

they kind of remind me of these creatures (I think they might have been called Hollows or smth) from the Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children movie

STAG VISION TIME

despite my dislike for the callous nature with which the stag plotline was handled, I kind of dig the stag vision scene

'It's just me and you now, Alina. And we're all we need, anyway.' I actually feel bad for this old fool simping for this wonderful gorgeous powerful woman despite lying to her and manipulating her and exploiting her power

okay 'I never needed you' *stabs the bone fragment out of his hand* beautiful power move I fucking love you so so much

alright ben looking like ✨ that✨ not only in physical pain but also emotional pain at what the Darkling clearly considers another betrayal from this girl he wants to give the world and maybe? loves? maybe? or at least has feelings for makes my fucking heart hurt while simultaneously soar at Alina taking back control and reclaiming her power as her own and stepping into her own

'how do you claim such power' okay could have had better dialogue there writers

the fucking score lifting as she says 'you cannot claim what was not given to you' good people my heart is full

one day I'll talk about my defense of the chosen one trope because god damn I kind of love it

hmm I wonder was that brief hesitation that we saw on Alina's face due to her thinking about the 'you chose to betray our people' comment or the 'i was trying to save us' comment because that will define some of her actions in the later seasons (hopefully god if we get some, I honestly don't know what with this stupid brownface debacle)

I'm not saying talking about brownface and pointing out that it is wrong (for further context, I am actually brown) and harmful is stupid btw I'm talking about the incidents involving brownface in question

I don't wanna talk about this anymore but I might feel like I need to and end up posting about it idk

goodness Ivan actually believing in this cause makes me so sad because he too has been victimized by the system that ostracizes Grisha and he has every right to feel the way that he does

Ben actually fighting in that ridiculously heavy cloak and kefta when he's about to turn 40 this year makes me super impressed because I as a 19 year old sometimes wake up with muscle pulls after weeks of inactivity it's weird idk

also I understand that this Mal Darkling fight is completely fanservice and serves nearly no purpose to the plot in general but like I? love it?

'I don't have to kill you Darkling. Your past will do it for me' YES HIMBO GO OFF YOU TELL THAT OLD MAN GODS THAT WAS SEXY AS FUCK

maybe it's because I know Darkles will survive and will come out of it more powerful but I can't get myself to feel bad for him at the moment

Inej and Mal tearing up at Alina's condition made me almost feel something despite it being super obvious she was gonna be fine and save their asses at the last moment

HER POWER

a solitary Kaz in spotted on the western side of the newly expanded fold in his signature all black emo boy look

okay but the crows with zoya and malina is such an adorable team? I literally love them so much?

INEJ'S FUCKING SMILE AT ALINA GIVING HER THE DAGGER AND KAZ LOOKING AT HER AGSGSGSHSJSJSK MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE

SHE KNOWS JUST WHAT TO NAME IT WELL GIRLIE I KNOW IT TOO AND MY FUCKING HEART IS LITERALLY GONNA BURST

okay I know they had one interaction but Mal and Jesper would be besties in another universe

Kaz glaring at Jesper when he answers ''course not' to Alina's 'will you still be trying to kidnap me?' tell me one fucking adaptation that got the dynamics between characters this perfectly

okay why do I love that Alina kept the jewellery as maybe a small nod to she has the wits to, um, you know, I don't wanna say steal, but, um, yeah, steal it because she knew she would need money to survive on the run

oh Jessie I love you so much I wish you hadn't said those things on you ig story about the brownface

it's like every single celeb I grow attached to god's like nope that one is going to do or say something problematic (hey btw im not reassigning blame to god for stuff people have done out of their own free will, 'twas a joke)

AAAAAAAH them saying 'the deal is the deal' in the show even though they didn't have to but like they did and I love them for it

Inej literally not being able to not stare at Kaz's face and smile after this <3

'I didn't expect it to burn at all. But it can be destroyed in the end. Just like him' babe you're not wrong but like um just you wait

god Mal being on supportive boyfie mode is well, absolutely adorable, obviously, but I wish we got to see more of him as a person outside of his attachment to Alina

kaz my little demjin I wish you hadn't have had to suffer so much to meet the crows and find your calling

fastforwarding Zoya's arc is also an interesting choice to me

I wish the hug hadn't been done though, it didn't feel earned

maybe Alina awkwardly and half-heartedly (remember, at this point the alliance is fresh and they still don't entirely trust each other) reached for a hug and Zoya avoided her? and then the rest of Zoya's lines followed? that would have made more sense to me at least

I love Sujaya as well, she brought life into Zoya with whatever little screentime and scraps of writing she got

inej asking kaz 'what's your angle?' beep bop bleep morp I sense another incoming embarrassing love confession

'but we do need you' *stares at her face intensely* 'I need you' ah look at the clock, look's like it's time to screech and flap your arms like you're a volcra because you're incapable of containing your emotions

NO YOU CAN'T GO DIRECTLY FROM KANEJ PROGRESS TO HELNIK BREAKUP (TEMPORARY, MIND YOU)

helnik my loves you don't deserve this I'm so sorry for both of you

Matthias fucking smiling ruefully while he says 'this was... just a cruel joke all along' THIS IS NOT FUCKING OKAY

omg hellgate

AAAAAAAAH NINA IS ON THE SAME FRAME AS THE OG CROWS I CAN'T HANDLE THIS

CAMERA PAN FROM KAZ SAYING 'JUST HOW THIS ALL STARTED... WE'RE GONNA NEED A HEARTRENDED' TO NINA OVERHEARING HIM AND LOOKING OVER?????!!!!!! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING THIS TO ME?!

Nina genuinely being curious as to the status of the sun saint because she obviously still cares

Also, 'But she is a Saint' okay Kaz trying to earn brownie points you have succeeded

DID THAT SAILOR JUST SAY 'GOED MORGEN FENTOMEN' TO MALINA BECAUSE I AM NOT OKAY WITH THEM JUST THROWING THAT IN MY FACE ALL OF A SUDDEN

gods I know I'll probably see them again but my heart is full of sorrow as my eyes drink in the sight of my crows for the last time for a while

I know people were annoyed at the meadow flashbacks but guess what? as a darklina, I loved them

'now that the Darkling is dead' could have phrased that a little differently my dudes that line needed to hold more weight

am I glad that they showed Darkles in this state with his nichevo'ya as a tasty little cliffhanger despite not being entirely true to the source material? maybe but only because Ben Barnes saying 'follow' and the nichevo'ya doing exactly so sent a chill down my spine

well, that's it for now, I'll have to move on I guess, get back to my real life which I'm obviously not ready to do

thank you to whoever actually read these things

I probably should have just made reactions or commentary videos instead but I'm lazy

my tumblr will probably go into inactivity once more as I emerge from my stint in the grishaverse

it was quite short (less than 2 months), considering the length of my other obsessions but it was definitely more intense than the other ones

#netflix shadow and bone #shadow and bone #grishaverse #grishaverse spoilers #six of crows #sab #soc #tgt #the grisha trilogy spoilers #netflix shadow and bone spoilers #shadow and bone spoilers #six of crows spoilers #sab spoilers #soc spoilers #tgt spoilers #alina starkov #jessie mei li #ben barnes #aleksander morozova #the darkling #general kirigan #darklina #malyen oretsev #malina #zoya nazyalensky #sujaya dasgupta #fedyor kaminsky #julian kostov #ivan no last name #ivan

[dipplie]

Temporary list of my stories and OC’s until one day I make a comprehensive and well made list:

Blinded:

Polli: My oldest OC and fun fact was my persona till she become edgy and I wasn’t 12 anymore. Everyone’s favorite yes yes I’m aware. Yellow, energetic, eats dirt and bugs, I can’t tell if she’s evil because of a wisp possession or just crazy. Breaks the 4th wall. Is she a Mary Sue???????? Who knows.

Melody: NOT Polli’s girlfriend despite Polli’s delousions. Has an abusive mom :(. Only has one eye and then no eyes and then robot eyes or smthn idk she becomes a badass when she gets older. But otherwise trembling in her shoes all the time.

Melodys Mom/Sharren: Bitch. Okay well all I’ll say is she’s old and grumpy and probably smells bad.

Louise: Total hotty, rich kid, FtM, got bullied as a kid for his weight. Had a squad of fans basically in high school. Lived with his mom after his parents got a divorce but his mom was semi abusive, projected her femininity onto him, and wouldn’t have been supportive of his transition, so between middle and high school he went to live with his dad and got his sex change and testosterone. His best friend in elementary and middle school stopped talking to him after his transition, and became his competition for the most attractive and sought after boy in school (except Louise is a sweetheart while his friend Tommy is a dick and really gross) His dad runs a company that specializes in technology, and after meeting and falling in love with Melody (even after all her abusive trauma and losing both her eyes) he has his dad and some of the developers create a way to get her vision back and I mean honestly I love him how could you not love him he’s so perfect.

Watching:

Fick: Big nerd boy with thick glasses. I feel like he’d use Reddit but don’t quote me on that. Big crush on Vivinya. Boy don’t wander into the woods- oh look dead body with a curse on it don’t touch it- aaaand now he has a wisp that makes him kill people, way to go kid. Panic attack central.

Vivinya: True crime girl, yucky yucky. Probably had a knife collection. “uwu I’m insane” except she actually is and starts using Fick to kill people for her and treats him like her “Yandere boyfriend” or something cringe and gross oh god. She deserves jail. JAIL. Needs to learn guys need to give consent too. Just overall sucks 1/10.

Tommy: I mentioned him early to be Louises ex best friend and rival. He used to have a crush on Louise actually but that don’t excuse being a BITCH!!!! Also needs to learn people gotta give consent he is just as gross as Vivinya. Cheats on all the girls he gets with because he’s again, a bitch. Idk if he deserved to get murdered though I mean he was still a teenager but it’s fine. Thinks of the song Seventeen from Heathers actually this story does feel a tad reminiscent of heathers with vivinya being a crazy and wanting to off a bunch of students. Huh.

Suzannie: Tommy’s older sister who’s a detective. What a coincidence. Monotone and depressed. Probably because her little brother got murdered. Gets real awkward when she’s talking about her brothers murder(s) to Fick and Vivinya like “when I find who did this to him they’ll regret being born”. Kind of really pretty actually.

Adolescents (there isn’t actually a story here yet but don’t worry about it shhhh):

Nelson: HIMBO HIMBO H- Jock stupid idiot big dork god he’s so awkward and his main personality trait is having a crush on Naomi and being a dork when talking to her. Probably could benchpress you.

Naomi: Gamer or something and a nerd geek. Her main personality trait is having a crush on Nelson and also being a dork when talking to him. Probably a weeb and fandom dweller. Can’t draw but she commissions artists to draw. She does write copious amounts of fanfiction though.

Andrés: Ohhh the school bad boy babyyyy. Baseball bat with nails in it or something. There’s like... A thing between him in Charlotte and he wants to be a thing but she’s being difficult and makes it hard to talk to her or about her and ugh.

Charlotte: Princess, high school princess. She’s actually pretty nice when you get to know her- but she’s a diva. Ballerina after school. Best friends with Naomi and doesn’t know what she’s talking about when she mentions ships or OTPs but she listens anyways because she’s a good friend. There’s like... A thing between her and Andrés but she doesn’t know if she’s super into him but geez he’s really hot but she gets such mixed responses when she asks her friends about it and what if it doesn’t work outttt.

Marlon: They/Them but they’re okay with either pronouns they aren’t sure yet, he or she is okay... Box boy box boy. Autism... He doesn’t want to admit He’s attracted to men but he’s totally attracted to men. He lives alone which is probably illegal for his age but somehow he manages. Everyone thinks he’s “the quiet kid” and he’s really sad about it no don’t make jokes like that please guys ahh-

Sing for Me:

Kat: The color pink, addahadda(adhd), angry and loud and short. For being only like 10 and being an adorable little lesbian dressing in sparkly pink dresses she actually likes screaming a lot and would totally sing heavy metal if her producers let her. Loud and mad but gets so soft around her girlfriend. “If anything happens to Brie I’m killing everyone in this room and then myself”.

Brie: French... Birds and stuff. Loves her girlfriend even though she is so loud. So fast. So much. Likes to write pretty things. Is only like an inch taller than Kat. Filled with so much love for everything.

Elliot: The girls manager. Lots of coffee. Stressed out of his MIND please help this man. Probably gay. Seems like a smug dick but he is just a tall and lanky dork that loves puppies and wants nothing more than for Kat and Brie to be happy. Accidentally brands them as sisters and then Kat kisses Brie and- oh fuck oh shit oh no what has he done. Hides the fan and non fan responses from them. Poor guy.

Horror Hosts:

Ichabod: Hot demon who’s the son of the current ruler of hell or something. I mean he’s hot, smart, and royalty, what more do you want. I very specifically hear the dub voice of Kyoya Ootori from OHHC as his voice don’t @ me. Goat legs????? Yeah??? Don’t be rude.

Barnabie: Ohhhhhhhhh big orc teddy bear I’m crying I love him????? He puts up a more confident ploy and the given stereotypical personality orcs supposedly have but he’s just a shy boy that wants to give girls flowers and call boys pretty. Help him.

Garrison: Gary Burger. Fat hairy gay man. I mean werewolf. Wouldn’t it be funny if I made the whole werewolf thing backwards and made him transform into a HUMAN only on the full moon??? Party animal, pun absolutely intended. LOUD AND FUNNY he’s a dork. Bites. Horny on main Garrison please you’re supposed pamper and flirt with the guests but not quite that much.

Vincenzo: Token Vampire but he’s Italian because I felt like it. Talk and lanky of course. Bitch face. Blood coffee? Yeah lots of coffee. Tired. Let him sleep in Ichabod. Steps on people. Can summon and reanimate corpses but has a bitter attitude towards them because they get annoyed with him as much as he gets annoyed with- everyone else. He does have a soft spot but idk where it is. When he’s talking to guests he’s more suave and sexy though.

Kai: Genderfluid haha get it because slime fluid-... I’ll stop. Probably objectively the hottest because they can look anyway they want and shift their vocals to sound like almost anything, also probably objectively the best in bed (if you’re okay with the texture of Jell-o) and honestly come on save some for the rest of us it’s not fair. This boy can SING oh my god seranade me and whisper in my ear baby. Spunky and sassy.

Hallvor: BABY OCTOPOD BOY OHHHHH I LOVE HIM HE’S SO SWEET AND IS AN ANGEL DARLING BOY SO EMBARRASSED SO SHY SOFTEST VOICE OHHH- ohhh nooo he’s got a knife ohhhhh Hallvor baby don’t be like that ohhhh... Used to work in hentai actually (I wonder why) but quit because of immoral practices and good for him we love that. Okay he’s not actually a yandere or whatever but he DEFINITELY wants to squeeze you a little too hard and has those crazy eyes.

Carla: Main character of this OHHC monster clone. She sucks I don’t like her because listen listen she kills monsters as a living and when she tries to kill our boys here, Ichabod catches her and goes “no” but then the rest (not knowing her murderous intent) fall in love with her and Ichabod is like: “shoot well I’ll keep you alive and around but I’m watching you” and blah blah romance and feelings and character development and wow she seems like she’s grown to care about them... So Ichabod removes a curse he put to prevent her from harming them or leaving... AND THEN SHE STABS THEM ALL IN THE BACK IM CRYING. I mean she might have an extra reason for needing to kill them but I haven’t decided if I want to actually put it in the story yet so.

Fingertips:

Maria/Marianna: Was this goth angry chick and the head of these losers but after a failed heist, fire, and being betrayed and dropped from a window on a 3rd or 4th story down into flames, and going to the hospital and changing her name, she changed totally and become a soft pretty girl... And then the next three boys went “HEY BOSS WE FOUND YOU” and she went “oh no” and now she’s just an anxious wreck like “no no no no no I don’t shoot people in the face anymore no no no no no” And has a fear of hands. Also was Diamontés best friend in primary school and yes all these characters went to the K-12 school all the other characters do/did. Pretty voice. The story is mostly about her being anxious around all the other characters because who was it that betrayed her and dropped her into the flames below? Find out next week on th-

Nikki: He’s that character that you see and immediately go “oh he’s gross and is angry and is a bitch” and you’re right he is and has a cockney accent and screams a lot and probably swings a knife around a lot, but he’s got a sweet interior (somewhere in there... somewhere) Screamo heavy metal. Him and the rest of these character briefly talked about having a band and then they didn’t and then at the end of the story they do and although he plays guitar mostly, if he does do lead vocals he screams a lot. Bitch.

Anthony: Pretty boy but like the “was in the army” pretty boy vibe. Probably played football in highschool. Pyromaniac. Punches Nikki a lot. Almost gives himbo vibes sometimes, almost. Kind of likes the old timey cozy aesthetic. Plays the piano sometimes but “oh I’m not very good at it” Plays extremely well

Diamonté: TALL. Purple goth boy aesthetic hellll yeahhhh. CRAZY EYES AND THEY SPEAK VOLUMES WATCH OUT. Drums. The scary kind of quiet because he just smiles at you. Crowbar. Okay but he’s actually really sweet though. Secretly loves watching Anthony and Nikki get into fights so that’s why he rarely puts a stop to it. I think he’s a sadist. Can be a gentle giant, but can also be a not so gentle giant. The only time he’s really talkative is after copious amounts of booze.

Unnamed/Undesigned 1: Literally a pimp and he’s pretty gross. Blonde hair and pink and white clothes.

Unnamed/Undesigned 2: Chick that likes to throw knives and be angry and threatens Marianna a lot but in a quiet and monotone way, Marianna is pretty scared and hopes that these are just shallow threats uhhhhh.

Unnamed/Undesigned 3: Sells guns (without a lisence of course) and wears a bandana over his face a lot. Tired. Grumpy.

Unnamed/Undesigned 4: Like Marianna, was cold hearted and cool but then got caught in the fire and got all soft. He only has one eyes but how sweet his eyepatch is a heart. Recoved along side Marianna and they are good friends good friends tha- wait Marianna are you going back with them oh god you can’t do that oh dear oh no oh-

(I don’t have a story or name for these two but they’re my comfort ship OC’s and my current hyper fixaction right now):

Rodriquéz: I literally designed him with almost all the traits I find attractive in a guy other than freckles so as you can imagine I find him super HOT. I also designed his personality on what I find attractive from a guy so as you can imagine I find him super GREAT. But anyways he’s grumpy and closed off and monotone and smug. I really could go on for hours about how I want him to step on me I’m so sorry guys. Both him and Samantha give the “21 and having immature fun” vibes. They’re a thing but they like going to bars together and splitting off and doing their own thing (or doing someone else’s thing if you get what I mean haHhahHhahGahGhaha-) But so help them if anyone doesn’t oblige by the “no” from one of these two, someone’s gonna get beat up.

Samantha: (She literally just my personality shhhhh don’t tell anyone it’s a secret) Bubbly, energetic, a little shy by extroverted, bombshell blonde or something? It took me way too much time and effort to design her but I’m really happy with how I finally designed her, I love her outfit. She could kick me in the face and I’d say thank you. Girly drinks at the bar. Got that trauma and anxiety™️ secretly though. Skips and jumps a lot. As I’m typing this I keep looking up at the drawing of her and more and more I would want her to also step on me.

(Space Story I don’t have a nice title for):

Unnamed/Undesigned 1: So... Funny story this story originally was with me and uh... My ex I guess... So I gotta replace the MC’s... Whoops ahaha... Awkward. But anyways the MC is a robot and a girl and is a slight tsundere or smthn.

Unamed/Undesigned 2: Has a space ship, works for this organization in space that protects the galaxy. Is cocky, lazy, sly, oblivious, and an idiot. The love interest- obviously. Probably accidentally committing space crimes. (Like space pirating hAHAHA-) Kind of cool when he wants to be.

Dandelion/Dandy: CAT. WITH A JET PACK. Kind of an asshole. Fun fact used to be Polli’s cat but then when the Second MC crash landed on earth she was like “fuck this noise I’m going with space boy laterz” (okay she can’t talk but she thought it).

Zizii: Lesbian alien? Yeah???? Okay but I mean her main character trait is being a dorky back alley doctor and engineer obsessed with the MC because they’re a sentient robot with emotions and a lazer arm and rocket boots WOW!!!!!!!!

Story I want to revive:

So I had a story I started writing a long time ago about this tech theatre kid that had a crush on this other theatre kid character, but in a play that other character has to kiss another person for the show, and as the story progresses the MC convinces themselves that it isn’t just a play and that their crush actually loves and is kissing that other kid. And in the play, that other character is supposed to die. Show night comes along and they die, but like actually, and by the hands of the MC (Idk maybe like a light falls on em or smthn). So it’s a grotesque scene the audience sees as just an act. (Mutters I dunno I think my idea’s cool...) So I’ve been wanting to design these characters and work more on the story but I’m busy being obsessed with Rodriquez and Samantha so. (And the Horror Host Club too I love them too still).

Other Characters that either don’t have a specific story or are kind of like background characters:

Jacqueiliquinne Merril: Sara Berry vibes from 35mm (go look up The Ballad of Sara Berry, maybe like an animatic idk the first one that comes up is nice) But otherwise rich, pretty, popular, bitch. Tries to like, steal Louise from his squad and it’s like bro that’s unnecessary who hurt you that’s so rude. She gives Nui from Kill La Kill Vibes too. Oh she knows her name is long and annoying but you have to say the whole thing.

Brianna: Jaqueiliquinne’s sister. Big titty goth gf??? She’s pretty popular too and kind of a bitch too but to a much lesser degree. Her and he sister throw hands a lot when no one is around, you know, “THEY GIRLS ARE FIGHTINNGGGG”.

The Louise Fan Club: 4 characters I haven’t named yet. One writes fanfiction of Louise and shares it with the others and with him sometimes and although he thinks it’s a bit weird he also finds it a tad endearing and supports her. One is an aspiring photographer and is constantly asking Louise to model for him. One is an artist and draws Louise all the time. And one is an aspiring musician who writes songs based of Louise’s relationships which again he finds a little weird but endearing and supports her.

The Jacquiliquinne Merril Fan Club: Genderbent-ish (I say ish because one of the characters is a little bit less defined gender wise) versions of the Louise Fan Club. Yes I’m lazy, and no they don’t get along with them, infact they hate each others club with a passion. 

Unnamed/Undesigned: I wanna make some hacker kid just because I wanna have one.

Unnamed/Undesigned: I also really wanna have a super cutesy magical girl and then a really super duper generic boring character probably like star vs the forces of evil idk I never watched that show but it looks cute.

Me: I exist in the universe fukc you I can do what I want it’s my story and I get to chose the who also if you wanna be in the mess of a universe go ahead draw yourself with my OC’s I allow and encourage and appreciate it. I literally made the Horror Host Club as a sort of Harem story and you are absolutely allowed to make out with them if you’re a monster fucker DO it GO ahead it’s canon.

and that is ALL I have FOR now Knowing me I’ll make like 12 more characters by July, and I mean I need more characters for the high school anyways so...

#Super Long #Characters #OC's #ALL my characters so far

[sbawnmendes]

30 things i learned about shawn after 30 q&a's (part 2):

hii, im back with a part 2 because you all seemed to like the first part & i absolutely loved making it! there is always something to learn so im here to share 30 MORE things ive taken away from another set of 30 q&a's on this tour!

(photo creds to owner)

1)  “to be honest with you, i started realizing that people are actually entitled to have their own opinion. they can think i am not good..not everybody is going to like me. i used to get mad & i realized i’m wrong for thinking that they have to think i am good.” that right there is growth. live by your own rules, makes yourself happy & in being happy with yourself, you’ll see that the people that love you & the ones that matter the most will be the ones to stick around. 

2) he owns a pair of crocs which leads me to 3 very important question - why have we never seen him wear these things & what colour are they & does he have any of those cute little charm/pin things in the holes? like a little guitar or something

3) shawn on bullying & the best way to combat it - “this is one problem i have..i remember being in school & i remember hearing ‘if someone is being bullied don’t say anything. step back. don’t get involved. go tell a teacher.. which i also agree with BUT i also think it is very important..if there is a situation going on that could be harmful & you could get hurt, be careful don’t get involved but to show love to people who need to feel the love. there is not enough. we even do this to ourselves..we critique & judge ourselves so much & we don’t love ourselves enough. i think everyone is so scared of being cocky or over the top confident & so scared of telling someone they love them 100 times a day & that is ridiculous because we will be the first to tell someone when they’re doing something wrong & we will be the first to tell ourselves when we are doing something wrong & i think that it is like..in those situations i find that the one who is bullying is the one who needs the most love & the most attention & the most support. we need to focus more on the people who are bullies & why they are & giving them the information as to why they shouldn’t be doing that & how much it is hurting. it is really up to you to choose the path of love for yourself & everyone around you over the path of negativity & hate & that starts with you.”

4) he. is. MeLtiNg.

5) the smell of popcorn makes him DIE on the inside, the drama is seriously expected at this point from sir leo 

6) touch is his love language - ‘LikE HuGs” yes shawn..like hugs 

7) “every time i think something negative i’m like, ‘ooh i’m feeling tired today’ i go, ‘no..could be worse. i could have diarrhea but i don’t’.”

8) forgive yourself.

9) apparently he is too good for chocolate now & sour peaches are his new favourite candy?? leave it to shawn to like the most random candy on this planet

10) his will to live through a zombie apocalypse is high..like 3rd last to live buuuttttt his need to feed is way higher so byebye shawn 

11) he just keeps getting funnier & funnier..i don’t know what brian is putting in shawn’s wheaties in the morning but keep doing it!!  

12) still really wants to eat a bug?? first it was a cricket & now he is telling flies he is going to eat them..some sort of bug whisperer i think. ‘shawn’s bugs be gone’

13) he is “moving away from calling fans honey” (no he isn’t) & suddenly he thinks it is just totally acceptable to call them darling..someone come get romeo over here

14) he is absolutely amazing at expressive faces when he is telling a story in the most dramatic way possible. there is no room for guessing. if he is confused, he is the most confused he has ever been. shocked? literally looks like he survived the electric chair. the look of complete & utter adoration? got that one down pat..where is the ring?

15) 60 shows later, he stretches sooOooo much & still can’t touch his toes 

16) *poses like superman, deepens voice & practically whispers* “mi amor” i know i know,..no need to elaborate (right milo?)

17) no gluten, no dairy, no problem! & thank the LORD he isn’t allergic to dogs anymore *cough cough* @ buzzfeed 

18) he is performing at the area 51 raid so be there or be..abducted (what is this set list going to look like?)

19) he thinks ferb would win over phineas in a fist fight which duh 

20) shawn’s baby fever is at an all time high & has tried to schmooze multiple parents into letting him take their toddlers on tour with him. mom/dad/guardian, need a day off? send your 3 year old off with this extra tall baby across the continent for a few days..i’m sure they’ll be fine! 

21) apparently shawn doesn’t actually look at his clothes before buying them because somehow he managed to buy the weird but oddly cute white t-shirt with the little monsters on it without realizing there was even the drawing on it 

22) treat you better is & always will be “the shit” 

23) mr. attitude. his sass levels are level 108 & it is hilarious..still loves to mock people BUT he combats his sass with the sweetest little interjections or comments whether that be “i love your earrings” or “hello beautiful” or “you’re adorable...i hope you just know that forever you’re adorable”. sour then sweet, kinda like a sour patch kid. sour patch - rockstar edition 

24) remember that one kid in 7th grade that argued with their teacher to the point of tears only to dramatically leave the classroom & run into the bathroom where the teacher had to go after him & get him out? yeah..that was shawn mendes. also “hEy 7tH GRadERs, iT’S sHaWN”

25)  if there was a fire in his house, screw everything & everyone else..the guitars are priority 

26) shawn’s advice on self love - “we spend all day judging ourselves. we will be like, ‘why did i say that that way?’ or ‘why did i laugh like that?’ that’s a very normal thing to do. what we never do is compliment ourselves. every single time you hold the door for someone and they say thanks, you never go, ‘shawn that was really nice of you!’ or someone is walking & you smile at them & they smile back, you probably just made their day but you never walk away like, ‘you’re such a nice person!’ if we spend so much time judging ourselves for things that are wrong, we need to fight that & compliment ourselves every time we do something right. keep a mental track now. wake up in the morning like, ‘i did my hair so nicely today! yeah, looking great!’ compliment yourself & you’ll start gaining a habit of loving yourself as much as you do telling yourself you suck & then your whole life will change.”

27) he does this really cute thing where he says things without thinking & will ramble for like 30 seconds without making any sense & then say something like “i don’t know why i just said that” or “i don’t know what i’m talking about” & basically talks to himself out loud in front of 200 people & it is probably the most endearing thing ever 

28) “there is something about being in love with poison that is super attractive to me”

29) he likes both green & red (purple? i don’t know) grapes because “they all taste the same” & i’m not sure if that was supposed to be a metaphor for ‘no matter what you look like on the outside, were all the same on the inside’ but i’m tearing up either way

30)  shawn bought 30 of his friends, 30 of them, airpods for the bus ride from toronto to nyc for his 21st birthday. 30 friends. 30. rich

#sm #text #q&a #smtt #shawn mendes the tour #shawn mendes #shawn peter raul mendes

[risingmoonyue]

An Unconventional Relationship!AU

I uh... I made a thing.

Basically, I read Lucid Dreams on FF.Net, and their cover story spawned this monster of a plunny. Expect stuff in the future, cause I have a fic in the works and at least one presentable piece of fan art (btw it’s fem!Shin)

xxxx

Long story short, Yukiko, Yuusaku and Chikage got waaaaaay too drunk

I mean, it wasn’t like what happened was originally their idea

It just sorta

Happened??

After way too many shots of way too strong alcohol??

So like

After they’re all drunk, they have a thought

Together they’ve got a son (Kaito) and a daughter (Shinichi)

They’ve both got secret identities

They’ve both got a particular dislike for the color black

And one’s a detective and the other’s a magician-thief

What’s more romantic than that??

And clearly they would make amazing beautiful detective-magician-thief grandchildren

So obviously they need to get married

So right after this, they all go on a mega wedding dress/suit shopping trip

Which basically means they spent millions on outfits they were gonna wear once

And probably no one was gonna see if the actual people in question had any say in it

Which

Let’s be real

They probably don’t

Then they go ambush their kids, like, three hours before school starts

And proceed to kickstart one of the most unconventional relationships known to mankind

Purely out of a fit of drunken madness

So, on Shinichi’s side—

Look, she’s had a long day, and it was barely five AM

She was up till three in the morning reading detective novels Ran definitely would never let her read in any normal circumstances considering she’s kinda still seven right now

Got probably less than two hours of sleep

And then she woke up to Edogawa Fumiyo stumbling into their house

Slurring a random excuse

And just

Leaving

Without her coffee

She only got one cup a month now because “it’s bad for kids to drink coffee, Conan-chan!”

And now she’s being dragged off

Without her coffee

And her parents aren’t giving her any answers (as usual)

They’re kidnapping her instead of talking to her like normal people (as usual)

And they decided to include her in their drunken, fanciful whims (as usual)

Really, she’s not sure why she’s surprised anymore

So, after getting no answers and being dragged off into a car ride that miraculously didn’t end in any collateral damage, she’s shoved into a building so fast she can’t even tell where she is

And finds out, hey, they apparently got a temporary antidote from Haibara—and were shoving it down her throat giggling gleefully she wants to run away now why would Haibara betray her like this???

And shoved into a big, poofy wedding gown

And suddenly, she is so, so suspicious

About where she is

And what they are doing

And very much hoping she is wrong

Because mom, dad, what the f***

(And this sounded way too much like them for her liking—)

She still didn’t have her coffee da** it!!!!

And on Kaito’s side—

To be fair, he’s had a better morning

Of sorts

If only because this isn’t the first time she’s been so drunk shenanigans happened

That usually ended in traumatized people

And I mean, he’s already a mind breaking, rule of physics ignoring magician-thief

He breaks minds everyday at school

Just look at Hakuba!

What’s the worst that could happen?

Well, apparently, the worst was her taking away ALL his supplies

ATTACKING his hair

GRAPPLING him into a suit

And waging PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE on him

Saying things like “you’ll absolutely definitely positively love this idea!

And “this is the best idea we’ve ever had!” (Who is the “we” in this equation???)

Really, all he wanted was to prank people a little. Maybe look up Aoko’s skirt. Avoid a witch that kept trying to seduce him. Destroy a jewel of immortality. Simultaneously catch the people that murdered his father.

Was that so much to ask?

Well, MOM, apparently it WAS

Seriously, where were they and why was she shoving him into a suit and where are they going now???

Kaito had a feeling he wasn’t gonna like this any more than all the other times Chikage went three sheets to the wind

And finally, the moment of truth—

So like, they are all finally in the same room

And Shin-chan and Kaito finally see each other

And are like—

“Please don’t tell me this is what I think it is”

And their parents are like—

“Oh honey, it’s exactly what you think it is”

Just……. very drunkenly

With gosh darn tears in their eyes, sniffling while daintily dabbing said eyes and whispering about how this was the happiest days of their lives

Shinichi and Kaito take a moment to share commiserating looks for having to deal with parents like this, because what the f***????

“You too, huh?”

“Yeah.”

So they end up being forced to sign the marriage contract

Because they both know their own respective parent(s)

And they knew they weren’t going anywhere until it was signed

And Shinichi was kinda on a time limit

And would like to know at least what kind of husband she was stuck with (what was her life???)

So they sign the contract to get on with their lives

And go out for coffee and hot chocolate

Because she STILL hasn’t had coffee

Kaito wanted to drown his woes

And they both needed to sit down and talk about what the frick they were gonna do now

Because marriage

And of course Shinichi “Corpse Magnet” Kudo strikes again cutting their talk short

And Kaito learns very quickly what the rest of his life is gonna be like

By the end of it, her time is up, and she’s running off while shoving Kaito her number like—

“Here’s my number gottagohavefunbyeeeeee—”

And Kaito’s just standing there gaping like a fish finny thing thinking “wat dafudge???”

Que months of nervous step-toeing around secret identities—

“Hey, I saw this seven year old that reminds me of you!” “O-oh really? That must be Conan-chan! Great kid, that girl, wish I could see her but I’m not here! At all! Definitely not!” “Uhhh…. okay?”

“Hey, you’re a magician right? Do you do stuff like Kaito KID?” “Yeah, KID-sama’s my idol—” “And Hakuba keeps saying you’re KID??” “I HAVE LIKE THREE ALIBIS I SWEAR SHIN-CHAN HAKUBA’S JUST A STUPID MEANIE HEAD DON’T LISTEN TO HIM—”

Trying to secretly protect each other from suspiciously similar super secret organizations—

“Oh hey, look at that black fedora guy, he has cool hair—” “OH LOOK A COFFEE SHOP I WANT COFFEE LET'S GET COFFEE!”

“At KID’s heist Conan-chan tells me there was a guy with a handlebar mustache, do you know—?” “HA HA FUNNY GUY I THINK THAT WAS JUST AN INTERESTING FAN I’VE SEEN HIM AROUND HE’S A JERK THOUGH YOU BOTH STAY AWAY FROM THAT MEANIE—”

And learning to read each other waaaaay too well

“So today I played a great prank—!” “You put Hakuba into a dress, dyed his hair red, pink, and green, then taped him to the ceiling. Later, you flipped Aoko’s skirt, replaced all the furniture with origami replicas, and screamed like a little girl after Aoko made fish for dinner when you guys got home.” “.....Shin-chan, are you stalking me~? I knew I was amazing but—” “Don’t push it.”

“Oh, I went on a walk today, it was gorgeous!” “Three bodies, two in a river one from the sky.” “......... Kaito. If you sent your stupid birds after me I swear—” “IM NOT STALKING YOU SHIN-CHAN HONEST—”

#dcmk #edogawa conan #kuroba kaito #kaito kid #fem!shinichi #unconventional relationship au #kaishin #i did a thing #theres no going back #arranged marriage #via crazy parents #detective conan #magic kaito

[mysteryofren]

So happy together part 3 (Ben Solo x Reader au)

Part 2

Note: Thanks for the likes on the last few chapters!! theres not too much ben in this one just a lot of sappy shit with ya gramps. also starting next chapter im gonna start naming them.

______________________________________________________________

  A day had passed and you had heard nothing from Ben. You wondered if he was still on campus or if he was just staying with his uncle until it was time to come back. It's not that you cared, it's that something told you to be worried about the guy. He seemed so defensive. You talked to Elaine about it over the phone. She told you not to worry about him, that he was just another rich kid asshole like everyone else at the school. She also took the time to try and lure you to her house for the week. You happily informed her you wouldn't be spending Christmas alone anymore. 

“See i know your grandpa wouldn't leave you hanging,” she said over the phone, “i just wish you would get over it and call your parents to see what they're doing.” 

  Your parents. You did try. They didn't bother to call back, not even send a text back. You didn't have the heart to tell her though. 

“My parents are actually in Russia for some business so it's hard to get a hold of them, but my pop pop did say he's having people over Christmas day, you want me to see if you can come?”

“I don't think my parents will let me. We usually do our gift exchange the day after remember?” 

“Shit that's right, I forgot. My bad, maybe you can still come over to his house for the exchange.”

“Yeah id love to see him again, besides I haven't seen him since the thing”

  The thing being your grandma's funeral. Mama and pop pop were the idea of what love is. They met young and were together right until her last breath. You were there too. You loved them both to death. They raised you more than your actual parents did so when mama died, you were heartbroken. You stayed with pop pop about 2 weeks after. He drove you to class everyday and picked you up after. You guys spent every moment together for a month after the funeral. The day you said goodbye to her was also the last day you saw your parents. They didn't stay long. Claimed they had a flight. That's when you decided you were done trying to connect with them.

“yeah , i'm sure he misses you. You're basically his other grandchild.” 

You heard someone over the phone call her name. “Hey I've gotta go, dinner time. Talk tomorrow?”

“Of course, have fun. Say hi to mom for me!”

“You know I will! Love you, bye” she shouted as she hung up.

You wondered what it was like eating dinner like a real family.

 A couple days passed and it was finally Christmas eve. You woke up earlier than normal, showered, and got dressed. You played some music while you packed a bag for the night and next day. You looked out your window and saw Ben walking across campus. Probably headed to his uncle's office. You decided to ignore him and kept packing. 20 minutes later you finally get a call from your pop pop telling you he's down stairs waiting. You have a car. You know you could just drive, but you love that he still insists on getting you. You lock your dorm and run downstairs when you run into a wall you were positive was never there before.

  You took a step back and saw the wall was in fact Ben. He turned around and looked at you with an unreadable face. Was he mad? Annoyed? What's with this dude in the first place? He opened his mouth to say something before he shook his head and walked off. After the awkward encounter you skipped out the doors and over to the old truck you were all too familiar with. To put it lightly your family was loaded. Your pop pop especially, but he still found it wasteful to buy a new car when he has one that still works. Even though he's had it since your dad was a kid. 

You threw your bag in the bed and swung the door open. 

“Hello there,” you heard your grandpa say. It was his classic greeting.”I've been looking forward to this since our conversation on the phone.” 

You got in the truck and slid towards him to give him a hug. You always loved his hugs. They were warm and comforting, and made you feel at home. You look at him and notice his hair was a bit longer than when you last saw him. He usually kept it short and simple.

“I missed you so much.” you say as you two separate. 

“We saw each other last month.”

“I know but that's too long to go without seeing you.”

“I know it is my dear, but hurry and get your seat belt on. I've got treats waiting for you at the house.”

You quickly put your buckled up on and looked out the window. That's when you caught another glimpse of Ben. He was walking again, looking at you in the truck. You give him a smile and wave goodbye. He stared at you, as if he was wondering what was wrong with you. Then he looked at the ground and continued walking. That's okay though, it didn't get to you. Almost nothing bothers you when you're with your grandpa.

  The entire ride to his house you guys listened to his old country music. Country wasn't exactly your vibe, but the old CDs in the glove compartments, and his favorite radio station were your entire childhood. You sang along with him as you approached the woods where his house was. Even though they were always business savvy, and spent their time in the city, your grandparents were country folk at heart. They had a condo in the city that they always stayed at from time to time when they had a lot to do in the city, but how for them was the house in the woods. They both took part in designing the whole house. They wanted it to be their perfect home.a place to raise their kids, retire, and take care of their family. It wasn't small, but it wasn't unnecessarily massive like your house was. It was 3 stories, had 5 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms. It had a cute little den for your grandparents when it was just them, a bigger living room for when they had company, and  a beautiful dining room. It had a long elegant table and the whole room was nothing but windows looking out towards the hills and forest. It was your favorite part of the house.

  He pulled into the driveway and stopped the car. He got out of the car and rushed over to open the door for you. You stepped out and grabbed your bag from the bed of the truck while he went to open the house. You stopped for a second to take in your surroundings. You listened to the sounds of the trees moving as the wind blew, you heard the animals calling out to each other. You saw the trees sway above the house, and watched the bird fly back and forth between their nests and the ground. You walked to the front door after your grandpa, and headed upstairs to the guest bedroom. You set your stuff down, dug out some pjs, and changed. After that you stopped by a photo of mama in the hallway. You looked at it remembering how beautiful and angelic she was. After a moment you headed back down stairs to see what was planned for the night. 

“Pjs already? You don't waste a single second young lady.” he said as he pulled out pots and pans,”so here's the plan for tonight. We are going to make a super special pancake breakfast, then we're going to watch movies and bake cookies, then for dinner have ingredients for homemade pizza, and we can do presents after my final surprise.”

“Sounds like the things needed for the best Christmas ever,” you exclaimed, “have you heard from mother or father lately?” 

“Last i spoke to them they were packing for a trip. I do wish they would come spend the holidays with us. Your aunt and cousin are on vacation with your uncle's side of the family, so they won't even be able to come” 

“We don't need 'em anyways,” you say playfully, “cause we're already having a better time than them.”

  The day went by fast. Faster than you would have liked it to. Your cookies came out great, although the last batch was a bit burnt. He had bought all your favorite toppings for the pizza too. You guys spent most of the day watching the movies on the little TV he kept on the kitchen table. You funneled through all the classics before it got dark. 

“Okay so gifts, who's going first?” he asked as you two munched on cookies in the den.

“Let me give you yours first,” you said as you stood up and made your way upstairs.

 You opened your bag and dug to the bottom when a flat gift wrapped in regular brown paper was laying. You grabbed it and held it close as you ran back downstairs. 

 “It's not too big. I hope you don't mind,” you handed it over to him. 

  He tore into it with a big smile and looked down at it. His smile dropped as he gazed in awe at it. You had saved up for 2 months to get this for him. It took a lot of money, but it was worth it. He always had a favorite painting of mama when she was younger. He loved it so much, it was the photo he chose to display at her funeral. She was done up pretty formally. Had her make up, and hair done, and was wearing the most beautiful jewelry you could imagine. I had recreated the painting for him but with me in it. I had gotten every little detail, even down to the small beauty mark under her left eye. 

“ you're even more beautiful than her.” he said as tears welled up in his eyes. You were glad he liked it.

 He placed it down and got up to hug you. You stayed in each others arms and quietly talked about how much you both missed her. After the tear fest was over he pulled an envelope out of his pocket. He sat down and handed it over to you. 

“It's not nearly as good as this was, but it'll have to do.” you gently took the envelope from his hands and opened it. Inside were two plane tickets. You looked at the destination. 

“Italy?” 

“Yes I asked Luke and he told me when spring break was so I could plan accordingly,” he said as he searched for a place to put the small painting.”You and I will be spending the week in Italy, seeing what the city has to offer. Were going to explore Florence so we can see all the amazing art in the city, the Venice, Rome and finally Milan” 

Italy was always your dream. It was a beautiful country filled with art, fashion, culture, and history. You adored fashion and art above anything else. He chose the perfect gift. After you helped him find a spot for the painting you hugged him tight. Believe it or not as rich as you were you had never been out of the country. You always figured it was something to do later in life. Now you can actually experience it. 

“Now for my final surprise, follow me.” he walked out of the den and towards the dining room. You followed after wondering what was up. As you walked into the dining room you noticed he had added curtains along the giant windows. You could tell it was to hide whatever he had waiting outside for you. He opened the door leading to the backyard and motioned for you to walk out. You slowly walked towards the door and stepped outside. Sitting in the middle of the yard was a large tent with little lanterns sitting outside of it.

“We used to do this all the time when you were a child. I thought it'd be a nice comfort to do it again.” the memories hit you all at once. Every weekend your nanny would drop you off at their house. You, mama, and pop pop would camp out in the backyard. You would all roast marshmallows, while the sound of their old country records played from inside the house. You all would gather the blankets from the house and lay them out in the tent as cushions to protect you from the cold harsh ground. Every morning the sun would shine through the tent waking you up and you would shake your grandparents awake so you could all watch it rise together. 

  You didn't realize that tears were falling down your face until he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, giving you a good squeeze. You wiped the tears from your cheeks and you turned to hug him. The tears continued to fall when it occurred to you. Nobody could ever love you this much. Not as much as they always did. Nobody would do little things like this to make you happy. Mama was already gone. What were you going to do when pop pop was gone too. 

“I love you,” you said sniffling, as you withdraw yourself from the hug, “I love this.” 

He wiped the tears away and looked like he was going to cry himself, “I love you too my dear.”

  You made your way towards the tent and unzipped the opening. It was exactly how you remember it. All the blankets were spread out. He had included pillows too, and you even noticed an old princess pillow you had left here once when you were a kid. You crawled in and felt at home. He crawled in after and sat down with a grunt.

“I suppose my old body isn't what it used to be.” he huffed out as he pulled a blanket over himself. You two stayed up talking. He told you about everything happening at his company. If you were quite honest you still weren't sure what he did for a living. What type of company did he run? It was something to do with weapons of some sort. It didn't matter though, you still listened. He asked about classes, and he even asked about how Elaine was doing. You seized the opportunity to ask if she could come over the day after Christmas to spend time with you guys, and of course he said yes. You also told him about the friendship you apparently had with Hux, even he was shocked by the news of your friendship. The town you lived in was fairly small, there were 4 main families that dominated and worked together. The Skywalker Family, the Hux family, the Palpatines, and your family, the Kenobis. The Hux family was known best for how professional and uptight they were, your father's words not yours. 

It felt like you two had spoken for an eternity before you eventually drifted off.

#teen!ben solo #ben solo fanfiction #bensoloxreader #ben solo #ben solo x reader #star wars tfa #star wars au #star wars fanfiction #star wars tros #star wars #kenobi!reader #star wars x reader #teen!reader #reader insert #obi wan kenobi #armitage hux

[delicioustrashlove]

To me : a honest open letter to my self. deep breath and open up and express 

What do you know . You went back there again and all though you held on super tight you couldn’t keep him could you? Of course not. You’ve lost your self every-time chasing him and you’ve never been able to catch him.

I thought I wouldn’t survive this one. I thought honestly I was not going to make something of my self . I whole heartedly was ready to give up . What ever happened happened and I could care less it’ll never be as bad as losing you. And I truthfully connived my self that my happiness only lied in your arms.

It took me so long to cry . Once I got back Colorado the reality of my new home, it was such a blur . For a while I pretended you died. To some how help my heart forget you. And thats all I wanted was to forget you. I deleted every picture and every single video .I blocked you on everything I could think of that youd have access to talking to me through . And for what . Just to black out once a week and tell you how much  I miss you and that I love you . I drank my self silly . I mean every event every party every outing I had to be there I had to be anywhere but in reality . Because reality meant no you. It meant what once was and will never be again,, reality meant excepting my feelings. And I wanted so badly to be tough and strong. I’ve gotten my heart shattered a million times by you , you’d think I would get easier . It didnt it was worse . I was so fully invested in you that life didnt exist with out you in it . I didnt know what that felt like anymore . I was so wrapped up In you so blind to reality . Loving you meant losing my self . I lost my self 4 times a year for 5 years trying to keep your heart. I broke my own heart letting you back in to my life so many times . I knew better . But the love I had for you was so much stronger . I couldn’t stay away . I also revolved my entire world around you , so when you where gone I felt so literally like the world was ending . I lost my whole life . I realize now thats not healthy . You have to always prioritize your health and well being before anyone . You have to love you before you love anyone. So wed break up id self destruct then Id put all my pieces back together the ones you broke. Id fix my self and I would get back on track I was moving on I was happy then just like that . One phone call at 10pm where you clearly to drunk to remember the conversation id be on a plane. Drop my job my home my family My friends … quite literally everything just to be with you . Just to love you. All I ever did in this world was so unconditionally love you. I thought I could hate you I did for a while . But I dont anymore . You where apart of my journey and it almost killed losing you but it was supposed to happen . It was part of the plan that god has for me. You coming int o my life brought so much love and bond that ill never feel with anyone else . I will never love someone the way I let my self love you. And when the lesson has finally been learned only then I can move forward to the next chapter. And your purpose in my life was love and lots of lessons and lots of growing . You think god doest hear your heart crying you think he gave up on you ya know , but he never did. In the end you’ll see there was such bigger picture. 5 years I spent going back to you and leaving you. Why did I always go back ? Because loved you but I clearly wasn’t seeing what god prepared for me. He wouldn’t believe his lessons or fallow his guidance so he kept bring ing me back to you so I could relearn and remember why I left and well you might be my soulmate your not meant to be in my story forever . Only a couple chapters . And once you’ve served your purpose to my life that god wants me to have experienced and learned I will be able to move forward. I first must let you go . And I finally am starting to. I got so unhealthy and so sad and so stuck and caused so many health problems to my body . So much that was almost to much to prepare. But I made a choice one day . I chose my self , and not you. I chose to love me and not love you anymore. I commented intently to my family and I mean really gave it my all. I learned that no matter what my parents wouldn’t never leave mom behind .and im going to everything in my power to be a good girl to them and build our love and our relationship . And I think that was gods purpose all along. You cant keep whats not for you . And I didnt understand that when we parted ways. I accept that now . And I know as I continue to stay on the right path god has such beauty waiting ahead for me… look how much I loved you and all I did for you imagine how much I will love the right man. I did alot. Every time we break up I have to fix my self . But I know now its all apart of the journey . All those trials with you just made me stronger it made me braver it made me wiser and it made men grateful for the good ones.  You breaking my heart was one of the best things to happen to me in the end. Because I never would stopped loving you I never would have left you behind. I would have always been your biggest fan and continued to love you till I ended up hating my self. You have the courage to set me free was the kindest thing you ever did for me. At the time I didnt get it but who I am now and what I ve accomplished for my self and how when you try really hard to be better and I mean really hard things kind of fall in to place. God smiles and says okay you deserve this you’ve learned you’ve grown . I manaaged to accomplish that goal of being close to my family . We are so close and we love trust and respect eachother so much . Our bond is very very strong . I managed to get my self too a doctor , I found out I complete sabotaged my health . And oh ya I have 14 allergies !!!!  And some of the effects of those allergies after time has caused a harmful build up to where I was 3 years away form being diabetic , my thyroid completely stopped working . Amplifying my anxiety and my depression . The last month. I was in az i would get sick a lot . Id eat something and get sick . The problem was I was so fuxking drunk all the time I didnt ever thing anything of it. I’ve destroyed my guy and its a blessing that wildly and randomly this doctor asked if she could test me . And we found a lot of issues and also got a lot of answers to a lot of my health issues. Im starting treatment for that . Ill be injecting my self every other day with medicine to help my body repair the damages I have done and it will also help fight allergic reaction and build immunity so this doesnt happen again . I also !!! Am taking my meds again . Different ones but im glad I chose to take this chance on them again . I figured if im going to  put my health and happiness first I dotn need to be drinking and If im not drinking a lot fo stuff is going to come to the surface and I don know how well ill be able to handle that reality. I also like I said thought. Was going to kill my self. I was so heartbroken so so so sad. I knew I needed help and I reached out and got. Now im happy and stable and I get out of bed and I have energy and im so present and to active. I work out everyday . I eat healthy and I lost some weight . My highest weigh t was 168 before our florida trip I got down to 147 , when worked for Linx I was 145 then after being with tj again my mental health went hay wire and I lost my self again . Completely lost. And when I got back to co I was 153 pounds …. I would shift from 145 to 147 … then I just stopped worrying about it and started doing something about it. I channeled all my sadness in to exercise . Im sad go work out im bored go work out im happy hey go work out get that good flow !!  Your angry you miss him what ever it was I worked out then it became all I could focus on cus I learned to love it so Much . I took on running again I put in the work . Things finally where falling into place . I was getting my self back and this time it was better then ever . Better then ever before . I unlocked this door and its been so beautiful. I one day weighed my self just to see assuming id be 145 I was 137 !!!! Wow !!! A week later I was 135 and today I am 133!!!!! Its so cool and feels so good to not be depressed not feel pretty in my clothes. And iliv Amy self. So much . I hope I start working at hooters soon and continue to have a great life. I finally got approved for unemployment and ally back pay and also and extra 13 weeks after mine runs out. Things are just happening . I wasn’t going to get any hadn’t outs . But I was at the bottom thats for sure and you know who was there ? Not tj not the guy you literally did everything for no not him . My mom and my step dad and my brother . They took me in . And it was hard and uncomfterable , but I just stopped going out stopped drinking as much . And did things for them no matter if they where mad at me or if it was awkward.i committed to being good fo them . And I knew it would take time . But little by little ive managed to accomplish all my goals . When I used to be the queen of quitting. I cant wait to see even more of what god has in store for me. And who I become . My skins cleaning up my body is losing weight I more active im healthy and im very in touch with my desires and my well being . I care and love and respect my self so so much. Its like a huge spiritual awakening. I love being alone . I dont feel like alone deserves me right now to be honest .Its gong to take a lot for me to love again but its okay . Not everyone deserves that form me anyway. I worked so hard to me this . To be who I am right now and I won’t let anyone take that away form me. You cause harm to my heart my well being just by !! If you disappoint me disrespect me or hurt me its done . You lost you dot meet my needs your not benefiting and there’s to many many and women on this planet . Ill never waist my time on the wrong one . Ever again. I respect my self to much to put someone over me! And I stand by that now and forever!!!  The new be is bette then ever and its gong to take a hell of a person to change my relationship status . And that cool im honestly not even interested . I dont care to date or hang out or hook up or even have sexual contact with anyone . Im so content with me myself and this beautiful transition im goin through I just want to focus on me and my family and my health. Because this is what its all about. This is what living is. this is life. This is beauty . This is whats important. I feel like im living . And im happy and im only going to get better and better. Thank you god for this life and thank you for giving me the strength to turn the page and start a new chapter on life. I fully trust you and the processs. And that brings me back to “god will never leave you behind” I needed to learn all those things that all may mistakes have taught me . And god has a way of constantly bringing things back Into your life if it has not yet served its purpose or taught you what you needed to learn.  I see that now. Positive mind set is very powerful . Loving your self is amazing and living through god is the best thing you can do . I will always you tj and I will always in some way wish there was a me and you forever .but I cant ever betray my self like that again. That door is officially closed.  See I thought my life was over when you said our relationship was over. But really it had just begun. Everything happened for a reason exactly how its meant to happen . Losing you meant I could finally find my self. It just lit up the path .  God bless <3 no angry  im happy and im I accept this and I forgive my self and you . Life is so Beautiful .

Some one very wise once said … -Life is not about how much you hurt its about how much your willing to suffer. ~VP

Im not willing to suffer any longer.  Except it feel it and then forgive and move forward.

[shhh-no-ones-home]

religious disbelief josh balz x reader

+++++++++ The end is a little darker than I meant it to be 😬

this is my first time ever writing for balz so if it sucks im sorry. also its broken into parts, the beginning is the beginning of the school year and the other two parts are after graduation.

im making a balz one with a similar concept and completely different outcome so if this one was bad or hard to read that one will be much more light hearted I promise.

Song: the reaper by as it is

tag list: @thisplace-ishaunted @ryansitkowskiswifey @alilpunkrock @theoneandonlykymberlee @svintsandghosts @cynic-spirit +++++++++

i walked down the sidewalk shoulder to shoulder with my best friend. josh and i had known each other for what felt like forever, only recently had it turned into something more than a friendship though. i laughed at what he had said to me.

"i told you once, ill tell you a thousand times. the day i decide to get on that two wheeled death machine is the day i decided you can take me away from this town."

i hated his motorcycle just as much as i hated the thought of moving away. i was kind of scared of both to be honest. everything i knew was here, especially him and i didnt want that to change. he nudged my arm with his.

"im telling you, youd be perfectly safe riding with me. but if your stakes are getting you out of this town i will gladly find every excuse."

i shook my head at him.

"you know i dont want to leave."

he sent me a look.

"come on y/n you cant really want to stay here all your life do you? i mean, whats holding you back, your parents? me? hell ill be gone in a year anyways."

i frowned at him.

"and you would just leave without me? given that we're still together at that point that is."

he looked a little offended.

"you planning on leaving me by graduation in the spring?"

i laughed with him.

"of course not silly, im just thinking ahead. if you leave, what am i gonna do? we all know itll take an act of god to get me outta here. even if i did decide to leave on my own my parents would never let me."

he smirked at me.

"true about the parents, but maybe we need an act from something a little darker than God."

he winked at me and i shook my head at him as we walked up the stairs to my house.

"yeah keep saying that and you wont be able to come over anymore. ever since my parents found out you listen to metal music theyve added you to the prayer list at our church."

we both laughed a little at that. he took my hand in his.

"oh come on, when are you gonna stop going? we both know you hate organized religion, and you listen to metal too."

i giggled a little bit.

"just imagine if my parents knew about my tattoo."

i said quietly. he hugged me to him and kissed me gently.

"i think theyd burn it off you, your dad would at least."

he smiled down at me, pushing my hair away from my face as the wind blew it around. i raised my brows.

"wouldnt that be something."

he kissed me again. then there was a knock on the living room window that made me jump. i turned around to see me mom knelt on the couch watching us. josh waved at her condescendingly, making me laugh.

"dont provoke her."

i turned back to him and he kissed my forehead.

"ill see you later. we've gotta work on that science project after all."

he winked at me as he turned and walked down the steps to my house. when he was almost to the sidewalk he turned around and walked backwards, waving goodbye to me.

"i love you."

he called to me and i smiled widely at him.

"i love you too!"

i watched him for a second before opening my front door and greeting my mom with a smile.

"how was work?"

i asked as i made my way to the stairs.

"work was fine, just tired, i wanted to wait for you to get home before i went to bed though. its nice being able to see you everyday now, not just on weekends."

i held onto the stair rail as i turned to her.

"well im glad i get to see you everyday now too, even if it is just for a little bit. ill probably start dinner about five thirty before dad gets home."

she nodded.

"okay sweetie."

°°°°°°°°°

i stood in front of my mirror and nervously shook my hands out. graduation was finally over and we had gone back to the house for me to change before the school led lock-in for the graduates. i wasnt nervous about the lock-in though, i was worried about my parents realizing that josh would be there too. they barely liked him at the beginning of the school year and as much time as we spent together since my parents were getting more and more infuriated with him. it also didnt help that he liked to take them to the edge on almost everything, arguing and getting on their nerves as much as he possibly could. i was shaken from my thoughts when my mom knocked on my bedroom door.

"you ready baby? you dont wanna be late."

i nodded and picked my bag up off the floor.

"yep, we can go."

i looked in my bag one last time to make sure i had everything, phone, playing cards, medication, water bottle, the likeness. when we hit the bottom of the stairs my dad looked up at me over the newspaper he was reading in the low light of our living room.

"where did you get that shirt?"

he asked and i looked down at it. shit. i had gotten it from josh.

"uh, a friend."

he raised a brow at me.

"have i met this friend? surely not i suppose if they are giving you clothing with satanic symbols on it."

he looked over at my mom who was now wearing a frown too.

"do you have time to change?"

he asked and i looked down at the time on my phone.

"no daddy, im already late."

i said in my best pouty voice. normally that worked, he couldnt resist the charms of his little girl. i watched him fold the newspaper up and set it on the couch next to him.

"fine but when we pick you up in the morning its going in the trash."

i walked to him and kissed him on the cheek.

"okay daddy."

i followed my mom to the door and out to the car. when we were buckled in she took off towards school. i looked down at my phone and opened a message to josh.

"what are you wearing?"

i hit send, a second later he texted me back.

"am i supposed to say nothing?"

i tried to suppress a laugh and just shook my head.

"no dork, im wearing one of your shirts and i need to change into something less 'metal'"

i hit send again and waited. then i got a new message.

"sorry babe, i dont think thats gonna happen."

then i got the picture of him in another shirt with the same band on it. i breathed deeply and sent him back an 'okay.' when i looked up we were already pulling into the schools parking lot.

"when are we supposed to be getting you again?"

my mom asked as i stood out of the car. i leaned down and looked at her.

"uh dont worry about it mom, its super early so im just gonna have someone else bring me home."

i looked across the car, through her window at joshs motorcycle. damn him. i turned my attention back to her.

"okay baby, well ill see you tomorrow then."

"thanks mom."

i said, closing the door and walking into the school. as i walked up to the table to get my bag checked i noticed josh standing in the back next to one of the vending machines. A second later my phone buzzed. it was a text from him asking where i was. i smiled to myself, thanking the counselor for giving my bag back and walked quickly to him.

"im right here."

i said making him jump and clutch at his chest.

"jesus y/n you scared the shit out of me!"

i laughed and took his hand in mine, kissing his cheek.

"i think thats a small price to pay for bringing your motorcycle."

he blushed and gave me his best sorry face.

"i forgot?"

he said trying to play it off. i just shook my head at him.

"its whatever, ill grill you tomorrow when we leave."

he smiled at me.

"okay."

i squeezed his hand in mine.

"come on, i wanna see what all they had planned, i heard there was supposed to be a magician."

he laughed as me as i dragged him down the hall towards the gym.

"sure babe."

°°°°°°°°°

i held onto josh tightly as he pulled up in front of my house. i knew my parents would probably be awake already, dad at least getting ready for work. the sound of the motorcycle wouldnt be any help though. i stood up off of it and took my helmet off, swinging my hair out. josh took his off too.

"you want me to wait a minute before leaving?"

i looked back at my house, the sun barely peaking over our fence, it was still so early. I looked back at him.

"i was gonna say no, but maybe."

he nodded.

"text me when its safe to leave."

he winked at me and i kissed him gently.

"thanks for bringing me home."

i pushed my helmet into his hands and walked up to my front door, pushing it open. i was surprised it wasnt locked. i looked around for a second, seeing no one and ascending the stairs. when i moved to go to my room i heard my parents door creak.

"shirt."

my dad demanded. i turned to look at him and sent him a nervous smile.

"daddy can i at least change first? i just walked in the door."

he looked kinda mad. i knew i shouldnt have let josh bring me home on the bike. he held his hand out.

"shirt."

i frowned at him.

"okay just give me a second."

i stepped into my room and went to close the door but he pushed it back open.

"give me that damn shirt before i have to rip it off of you."

"cant i change by myself?"

he went to grab for it but i pushed him away.

"you got it from that no good josh kid didnt you? thats the friend. You know how we feel about him."

he said sternly.

"daddy hes my boyfriend."

he tried to grab at me again, holding the shirt firmly by the collar.

"i told you to stop seeing him. hes no good for you, especially if hes pushing you further and further away from god."

he moved his other hand up to tear the shirt but i held his hands in place.

"what is so wrong with that?!"

i shouted, eyes closing tightly. he paused for a second and i only opened my eyes back up when he let me go.

"how dare you say that in this house! if you are going to live under my roof you are going to love and respect the lord that built it."

"the lord didnt build shit! and maybe i dont wanna stay in this house anymore!"

he was fuming now.

"fine! you wanna go to hell? then you can fuck your boyfriend right to the gates of it, tell the devil kiss my ass while youre at it!"

he shouted at me, turning on his heel and storming out of my room. i breathed heavily for a second before looking outside. josh was still sat on his motorcycle out front, looking between his phone and the house. then i got an idea. i grabbed a bag from under my bed and started shoving shit in it, anything i could find. my favorite shirts, socks, undergarments, pants, money, anything id need. when it was full i slung it over my head, shoved my phone charger into my purse/bag that i still had on from the lock-in and stormed out of my room too. when i hit the end of the stairs i was met with my father sat on the couch, angrily putting on his work boots.

"where do you think youre going?"

he said a little snarky. i gripped my bag tightly.

"if you dont want a non believer living under your roof then ill find somewhere else to live."

i walked quickly to the door and just as i opened it he grabbed me by the hair, pulling me back.

"or maybe you just need an attitude adjustment."

he pulled me back and i reached out.

"let go of me!"

i practically yelled. i could hear him breathing heavily.

"you will learn to love and respect the lord as well as the family he has put before us. if you wont do it willingly, then ill make you."

"is that really a good idea?"

i heard josh say and i looked over at him standing in the doorway. my dad pushed me away from him.

"look at what youve done! youve corrupted my little girl! she's a satanist because of you!"

i ran to josh and he held me tightly to his side, he looked down at me as tears fell from my eyes.

"sir, in all due respect she has never once praised the devil. i would know, im the only one she hangs out with when shes not at home."

my dad looked beyond mad.

"if anything id say you pushing the lord down her throat her whole life has made her denounce your religion. so maybe you should be looking at yourself, not me."

my dad started after us and i pushed josh out the door, slamming it behind me. it swung open as we ran down the sidewalk to joshs bike.

"get back here you little shit!"

Josh jumped on first, starting it up and handing me my helmet.

"drive!"

i shouted as my dad got closer. next thing i new we were booking it down the street. i just held myself tightly to josh, resting my head on his back as tears fell heavily from my eyes. when we were a few streets over he stopped. i sat up and took my helmet off.

"you okay?"

he asked, holding his own helmet against him and looked at me very concerned. i sniffled and wiped my face.

"i am now. but i wanna get as far away from here as possible."

he looked between my eyes.

"are you sure?"

i nodded quickly.

"please josh, just take me somewhere safe. somewhere i dont have to deal with this anymore. wherever its just me and you."

he kissed me gently, pulling away and resting his forehead against mine.

"ill take you wherever you wanna go."

i pulled away and nodded at him.

"I love you josh."

I leaned forward and hugged him to me, feeling him kiss the top of my head.

"I promise I'll keep you safe."

#wattpad #x reader #miw #josh blaz #balz #imagines #one shots #unedited #178

[bitchmilsky]

betrayal

a/n: this did not turn out as i planned. like. at ALL. its too domestic at the end and totally deviates from the theme and also i didnt proofread so. whoops. also all the sections are like super short until the last one???? like i went OFF there. ig i just wanted a happy ending???? anyway ENJOY!!!!

summary: a divorce leads to 8 years of turmoil for henry hart. 771 words

tags: @cactus-con @rorythevambire @mychenrymadness @coolies326 @kiddangers @up-the-tube @bijerbear @chenoahchantel @pearlselegancies @henryhearts @ciara-knightly @an-anxious-gay-mess @im-a-bucketeer @agentbootyreportingforduty (if you ever want to be added/removed, lemme know!!)

Betrayal. That's all Henry could feel as he watched his own father walk out the courtroom doors, arm-im-arm with none other than Ray. His mother had left minutes earlier, trailed by her "tennis coach", Darius. Salty tears rolled down his cheek as he realized that his family would never be the same. Piper walked over to him, and he lifted her onto his hip, like he did when they were younger. No words were spoken - or if they were, he didn't hear them.

~~~~~

Kid Danger was gone a week later. The Mancave only brought him pain. He was the one to take the elevator down that morning. He was the one who saw his dad wearing Ray's bath robe. He was the one who ran off in a fit of tears without a word. He barely heard Ray's "Henry, I can explain," through the elevator doors, but he was already gone. He didn't want an explanation, he didn't want an excuse. He wanted it to be over.

~~~~~

So yes, Henry was mad. He was mad that his mom was sleeping with Darius. He was mad that his dad was sleeping with Captain Man. But he was livid that Ray had let it happen. Ray, who Henry had confided in. Who he told everything to. Who knew Henry's concerns about his family life. And who had ASSURED him that if anything went wrong, the Mancave was always open. But not anymore. Jake had moved into the Mancave, and Henry wanted out.

~~~~~

He fell into a rhythm of sorts. When he was at his mom's, he didn't talk to anyone but his sister. When he was at the Mancave, he talked to Schwoz, Charlotte, and Jasper if they happened to be there, but that was it. Piper did the same. Under different circumstances, it wouldn't be like this. But both of his parents had cheated. Both of them tore the family apart. And right now, he didn't want anything to do with that.

~~~~~

Henry left Swellview as soon as he could. He went to college out of state, and didn't plan on moving back. His relationship with his family improved bit by bit over the years, but never quite made it back to where it had been before. He wasn't sure it ever would. All the lying, the stepping out, going behind each other's backs, not to mention the neglect that happened even before the divorce - it was too much for him.

~~~~~

Henry hadn't been back to Swellview in 6 years. Charlotte had secured a job as a lab assistant out in California while working on her graduate degree. Jasper had started up a Bucket Hut of his own somewhere in Minnesota. Piper was studying fashion out in New York. His dad and Ray kept in touch a little, but stopped trying to invite him back. His mom just stopped talking to him. So really, he had no reason to return. Until he got The Letter. Henry was bringing up the mail that chilly November evening, when he noticed he had something from the Mancave. Save the date! it read. Ray and Jake's wedding. Saturday, April 15, 2028. Be there or be square!

Henry laughed. Of course Ray's save the date would have something cheesy like that. And then he realized.

Ray's wedding.

Ray and Jake's wedding.

His father's wedding. To Ray.

Henry froze. They didn't even bother to tell him. Although, he supposed, I never really gave them the chance. He recalled Ray mentioning he was going to ask Jake something important, but Henry hadn't really been paying attention and never thought anything of it. They really are happy together. And Henry came to a conclusion. He could still be mad that his father cheated. He never had to forgive him for that, and he never had to get over it. But he could still love him, and he could still love Ray. He could go to their wedding and be supportive and love them and be angry. Their relationship was damaged, but not irreparable. It would never be perfect, but it would be something. And so he did something he hadn't done since the divorce 8 years ago - he called the Mancave. His heart raced as the Facetime call rang, but he couldn't help smiling when Ray's face appeared and immediately lit up.

"Honey! It's Henry!" he called behind him. Jake walked on screen, saw Henry, and ran over.

"Henry! How are you?" he asked.

"I'm good, I'm good. I just, y'know, wanted to say... congrats. I'm... I'm happy for you two." Ray put his arm around Jake and grinned, but then looked solemn.

"Hey, Hen, I know things have been weird between us, but, well, we've been wondering..." Ray trailed off.

"Wondering what?" Henry looked concerned.

"We were wondering if... maybe..."

"We want you to be in the wedding!" Jake interrupted.

"W- You- Me? But I-"

"You're my son," said Jake, "and nothing can change that. We deserved that treatment, and if you say no-"

"We totally get it. See, I can interrupt too, babe," Ray joked.

"Listen, you guys..." Ray and Jake looked at Henry with eager anticipation. "I'll totally be your wedding."

"Hey-hey! We did it babe!" Ray threw his hands up in excitement, and quickly kissed Jake. "Now, for the wedding itself..." Ray trailed off into venues and bakers and the officiator, and Henry zoned out a bit. His mind flew in different directions, and he knew he would always be angry, and the relationships would be tense. He wouldn't be returning for good, but he could survive Swellview for one wedding.

#I THOUGHT IT WAS LONGER IM SO UPSET NXBFHS #henry danger #henry hart #piper hart #jake hart #kris hart #ray manchester #jasper dunlop #charlotte page #fanfic #rayke #cheating #divorce

[absolutelykippen]

@thegirlykoala asked me to write a fic where tj’s ex runs into tj+cyrus while they aren’t dating

thank you for sending this and i apologize for it being so late + me saying that id post it three days ago :/

-

TJ knows he likes Cyrus, he’s just too afraid to tell him. The recurring thought falls back upon him when he’s at the swingset. Cyrus is with him as well, swinging slightly above the floor with his feet scraping at the sand, sending dust into the air. Meanwhile TJ stays with his feet planted on top of the mound of sand, digging his heels into it to make patterns of his shoeprint. His eyes are trained onto Cyrus’ face, everso adoring his small but cute smile and the way the sunlight reflects across his skin.

“Why aren’t you swinging?” He then asks, making TJ quickly blink and look away from Cyrus. He silently hopes that Cyrus hadn’t caught him staring. “You’re usually the one to…” Cyrus laughs awkwardly, and slowly his swinging comes to a full stop.

“Just thinking,” TJ answers with a shrug, “‘Bout stuff.”

Giggling, Cyrus says, “Oh, stuff. What stuff?”

TJ, of course, doesn’t tell him the truth. Instead he says something about being nervous for their upcoming physics exam. Cyrus gives him a sympathetic smile, “You should ask Buffy to tutor you. Or- or I can, you can totally come over anytime and we can work-” TJ looks behind Cyrus, his voice becoming tuned out as he tries to make out the figure that’s walking towards them. He gets an unsettling feeling in his stomach as soon as Cyrus asks him, “Are you good?”

“What? Yeah, it’s- Evan?”

TJ barely sees Cyrus’ confused expression before he’s standing up from the swing. His hands automatically feel sweaty, and he rubs them down his thighs to rid of the clammy feeling. The boy leans against the swing set with a smile on his face and says, “Hey, TJ.”

“Evan,” TJ repeats, “Hey.” He looks back to Cyrus. The brunette boy is facing the sand, shoulders tensed seeming ever so uncomfortable. TJ doesn’t blame him, he does, too. “What are you- what’re you doing here?”

The boy, Evan, shrugs. “I came here with my family and spotted you. Told my mom I was coming over here to say hi, so,” he explains, “She misses you, by the way.”

Cyrus ends up standing, moving away so he isn’t in between them anymore. He mumbles under his breath, something about wanting to let them be. TJ wants to turn around, wants to keep Cyrus right beside him.

“Is he your new boyfriend?” Evan asks. The question causes TJ’s eyes to widen. Subconsciously he takes a step back and turns his head to look at Cyrus.

“No, no. Just- we’re just friends.”

The words feel like lead on his tongue.

“Right,” Evan grins, “Anyway, I should head back. We were getting ready to leave. Maybe I’ll see you around.”

He leaves with a salute, a thing he has always done. TJ waves, mouthing a farewell that he’s sure Evan didn’t catch. Once Evan had disappeared past the trees in the park, back to his family, TJ executes a deep breath. “Who was that?” Cyrus asks while hesitantly stepping back to his respective swing.

TJ bites the inside of his cheek, mind battling over whether or not he should tell Cyrus the truth. But then Cyrus grabs ahold of TJ’s wrist, letting their connected hands hang between them, and it then occurs to TJ that he could really tell Cyrus anything.

“My… my ex-boyfriend. My first and only ex, actually.”

“I didn’t know you were- I mean- that’s-” Cyrus stutters.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, if you’re mad or anything, I get it.”

Cyrus’ jaw drop slightly. Then he laughs. “Dude, why would I be mad? I’ve been wondering if you were into guys for months.”

The single word slips from TJ’s mouth before he has time to comprehend what Cyrus had said, “Why?”

“‘Cause I like you! You’re so oblivious sometimes, dude.” He crosses his arms over his chest, and bites down onto his bottom lip.

They’re both silent for a minute or two as soon as Cyrus stops speaking. The brunette looks worried, face having contorted into a painful countenance. During this, TJ feels his heartbeat speeding up while his mind is racing for something to say. Is that what it took? His ex appearing at their usually hangout spot?

“I like you, too,” TJ says, almost whispering.

Cyrus’ shoulders fall and he heavily sighs, showing how anxious he’d been while waiting for TJ to say something. And something positive, at that. “Can’t believe it took me getting jealous over you talking to an ex to tell you.”

TJ smirks. “You were jealous?”

“At the precise moment you told me he was your boyfriend at one point, yeah. But it was overclouded by the revelation that you aren’t straight.”

The smirk vanishes, and TJ falls into that same adoring smile from earlier. And this time around, he doesn’t have to hide it.

-

thanks sm if you read this. im not proud of it but school is getting super stressful rn and i didn’t want to just ignore the prompt ask. i really really appreciate it though and hope u liked it :)

#again it was just a bit too long for the ask #tyrus #tyrus fic

[fluidityandgiggles]

Sleep Is For The Weak - Chapter 12

Previous Chapters: Prologue, Chapter 1, Chapter 5, Last Chapter

Writing Masterlist - for previous chapters not otherwise linked, Read on AO3

Notes (I guess): Thanks a lot to @ilovemygaydad for updating y’all about my wifi situation, the wifi works semi-well now, and... well...

WRITING THIS CHAPTER WAS HELL AND A HALF AND IM SO GLAD ITS FINALLY FINISHED.

Ahem. Excuse me. I have a couple of very important things to say, though.

If any of you haven't read the latest chapter of Keep Him Safe, which is right here, please go do so. I read it the moment it was posted and... I was at dinner with my family, so I had to hold in my squealing... to be perfectly honest with y'all, I already knew what was going to happen in that chapter since I started writing chapter three, I think...? So I have known about this for a very long time, but it still made me super happy to see it actually happen in writing. So... go read KHS, y'all. You really should. It's awesome.

(Quick update: I checked my screenshots and... yeah, I've known about that since July, which is when I started writing this fic. Again, I've known about what happened in sleep for six months, and surprisingly didn't spoil almost any of it to anyone around me. I deserve a fucking prize.)

To anyone who just came over from Eva's shameless plugging of me - hello, nice to have you here. In this fucked up piece of angst we discuss queer history as well as Remy's personal history, or - as I said to myself while reading and re-reading what Eva has to say about this fic - "well, this story is as much about queer history as it is about Remy, where he came from, where he's going, where he came from cotton eye joey'n". And to anyone who's a regular reader, I'm so glad you're sticking around to read this... this thing. It's become a monster in my head, I can promise you that much.

As always, thanks to @broadwaytheanimatedseries for the original idea, to @whatwashernameagain for the original fic (can you believe it’s been six months since we came up with chapter 23?), to @anony-phangirl and @asleepybisexual and @winglessnymph for the help wherever needed, and a special one to Morgan - again - for helping me get the word out. All of those people are my shining stars and I love them so much.

Tag list (sort of): @bunny222, @ab-artist, @sweet-and-sour-shadowling, @your-username-is-unavailable, @virgilcrofters, @why-things-go-boom, @ilovemygaydad (thanks again, kiddo!), @violetblossem. @maybe-i-like-the-misery, @book-of-charlie, @thatsanswitch

(Wanna be tagged? Just lemme know!)

Trigger warning: period appropriate transphobia (the early 00s were not exactly trans-friendly). This chapter discusses rape again, this time in a bit more detail (nothing graphic, it’ll never be graphic, I promise), and includes a... panic attack of sorts. Be warned.

—————

January 24th, 2003

Emile's smile faltered.

"...so what if I got raped?" He muttered, putting down the stack of chairs he was holding. "What's done is done. They had their fun—"

"They…?" India tilted her head. Oh shoot… "There was more than one person?"

"More like three… what? Why are you looking at me like—"

The stack India was holding fell to the floor.

"Did you tell anyone?" Emile stared at the floor. Maybe she'll go away if he doesn't cooperate. "Emile! Did you tell anyone?"

"I told the doctors…" Emile's voice faltered. "What's going on?"

"I'm surprised you're even alive right now!" India's pacing was… terrifying. For some reason… she suddenly just… turned so scary. "Mixing date rape drugs with alcohol, which is what I'm assuming happened to you, is so dangerous! And I'm only assuming that's what happened because I heard from Remy that they found GHB traces—"

"I'm not proud," Emile managed to stutter. "Of… all this. I just… I can drink, okay? I made some mistakes in the past—"

"You're seventeen!"

"I made some mistakes in the past, and… this one makes me feel like all those mistakes have been trying to tell me that I shouldn't exist…"

"No… no, peach, please." He already started crying by the time she stepped in to hug him. "I get that. I really do. Sometimes I think about how much better my life might've been if I pretended like I'm 'cured' of being transgender after conversion. My cousin wouldn't have done what she did, that's the biggest plus. But… I wouldn't have come here. I wouldn't have started on my way to become a statistics analyst. I wouldn't have met Jenna. I would probably be living a sad, closeted life back home, and that isn't such a nice thing."

"You were too…?"

"I was too, yeah… as victims, we gotta stick to each other."

The wet spots on India's sweater were getting larger by the second. But she didn't mind it.

"Like I was told when I was sixteen," she said, much quieter than before. "Nobody is going to believe a man who says he was raped. We gotta stick together, whether we like it or not."

——

"Hey, isn't that that friend of yours?" Remy heard behind him about two minutes before the meeting started.

Oh, good.

"Hey, didn't you deliberately choose to forget that I live in the other side of the US from you because you wanted to be a little fuck?" Remy asked back, looking at Chris turn redder than a tomato.

"I swear to god, I had no idea!"

"Suck it and your excuses, Mendez."

"Hey, hey… come on, Remy. Won't you at least let me make it up to you?"

Remy couldn't stay angry… well, he could. But not as angry. It was a stupid reason, too…

"I will." Chris beamed at him. "But it'll take a very long time."

"...you have a week."

"I won't let you down," Chris said with the same wide, obnoxious grin, quickly kissing Remy's cheek and taking a seat.

Fuck him and his obnoxious self.

On the third of January, Remy and Emile sat down on the hotel bed in what was probably the fanciest hotel Remy's ever been to (though he never really visited any hotels in his life, no time or money for that). They were listening to Gustav Holst's The Planets as Emile performed a one-man dramatic reading of No Exit, and Remy couldn't feel more at peace.

This situation right here - all the people, all the tension, Chris right there a few steps away from him - was the exact opposite.

"Do you want me to leave?" A quiet voice said and Remy felt himself being squeezed so tight, he was sure his ribs would crack. Emile. "I can leave if you—"

"Come on, sit next to me," Remy said as quietly and took a rather far seat from Chris. Serves him right.

"Happy Friday, everyone," India opened the meeting. "I see that we got some new people after the break, so we're going to do another name round. Who wants to start?"

Emile raised his hand almost immediately.

"I'm Emile, I'm— do we mention our major?"

"If you want to."

"I'm Emile, I'm a psychology major, and I'm probably gay. Or asexual. I just… don't really know if I'm more gay or asexual yet."

——

Monday, January 27th

"Look, I find some of what you teach suspect," Emile hummed to himself as he skipped behind Remy back to their building after a particularly entertaining sols 20 class. "Because I'm used to relying on intellect, but I try to open up to what I don't know, because reason says I should've died three years ago…"

"Em, stop it," Remy half-laughed. "I get it, you're still thinking about Rent."

"It was such a good show!" Emile whined - well, sort of. "Jai Rodriguez was really good!"

"I met Idina Menzel through this," Remy said with another chuckle. "She's nice… kind of a diva, if you ask me."

"So… like you?"

"What do you mean, like me?"

"Nice, but kind of a diva." Emile nudged him. "I'll bet you she's totally selfless and sweet but acts like she doesn't care about anything in the world—"

"No, actually… she isn't." Remy sighed. The memories were foggy - it was over eight years ago - but… "Dad is working on some project with her again. Her and Kristin Chenoweth…"

"Kristin?" Emile shrieked. "Good golly, I love her! She's so sweet and talented!"

"I'm really not supposed to tell you anything," Remy laughed, and then stopped.

A figure made him freeze at his doorstep. A small, shaking figure, with braided brown hair and an ill-fitting, black, puffy coat.

Leah was rapidly knocking on Remy's suite door.

——

"Why did you think it was a good idea to come here?" Remy asked, careful not to scream. Leah sat in the living room, her hair dripping wet from the shower he made her take, wrapped up in the clothes she brought with her in her lime green schoolbag. She was waiting on her hot chocolate.

"I wanted to."

"How did you even get a bus ticket? You're seven!"

"I took money from mom and went to the bus station!" Leah huffed. "I know where the buses are, and I know how to—"

"I didn't say you don't know, Leah Mae," Remy chastised, putting the cup of hot chocolate on the table quite forcefully. "But you're seven years old! This was incredibly dangerous of you—"

"I don't wanna live at home anymore!" Leah screamed. "Mom was mean all of Christmas, and Lizzie wasn't being nice when we went back to school, she didn't want me to be her friend anymore, and Rachel was annoying—"

"Sweetie, they're going to think I kidnapped you!" Leah was taken aback. Remy was worried to the point of terrifying. "They're going to think I kidnapped you, Leah. It won't end well!"

"I didn't think…" the tears started coming out. Oh shit… "I didn't mean it! I just… I don't like being home! Don't be mad at me!"

"Oh, baby, no, I'm not mad at you!" Remy was quick to take her in for a hug. His poor baby sister… "I'm just worried, Leah. Extremely worried. Never do such a thing ever again, okay?" She nodded in his arms. "There's nothing we can do about this now, but—"

The door opened with a bang, and "I brought the bunnies!"

Leah immediately perked up. Mycroft tried to hop straight into her lap the moment he was close enough, since he already knew her and was very worried for the tiny human, but Lestrade took his time getting to know her. She was new, and he didn't know her yet, and what if she wasn't going to be nice?

"Leah, this is Lestrade," Emile said with a huge smile, closing the door and coming to cuddle them all - Remy included. "He's Mycroft's brother, and I adopted him after Christmas!"

"But you don't celebrate Christmas."

"No I don't, but you do." He booped her nose, making her giggle. "Lestrade is a nice boy. Give him a bit, he'll jump into your lap in no time."

As Leah entertained herself, playing with the bunnies and telling them stories, Remy pulled Emile to the side.

"She ran away from home!"

"I heard that when you asked me to go get the bunnies, Remy."

"She's seven years old! What do I do with a seven-year old runaway? Is it even a thing? A seven-year old runaway?"

Emile kisses Remy's cheek quicker than he could process it happening. "It's going to be fine. Call Linda, let her know that Leah is here—"

"Leah asked me not to tell anyone she's here," Remy sighed, rubbing his face in frustration.

"I understand, but… Linda is still your mom. Leah is still seven years old. She needs to go home, whether you like it or not." When Remy still seemed like he's having trouble processing it, Emile pulled him into a hug. "Do you want me to talk to her about it for you?"

Remy could only say a very weak "yes please" before Emile went back to the couch, to talk to Leah.

He was jittering. He was angry, and scared, and disappointed, and proud, and he felt everything so intensely and was so shocked and confused that he couldn't name it. He barely turned eighteen last July, he didn't even know how to drive yet, and he was absolutely, most definitely, going to be in trouble for this seven-year old child showing up at his door after running away from home.

He wasn't going to call Linda. But he couldn't keep Leah over. And he didn't know shit about raising children, for the period of time he was going to have Leah over, until he figures out what to do. Remy wanted to scream, how much he wanted to. But he couldn't.

So he did the next best thing he could do. He dropped to the floor and started crying.

He was too tired, physically and emotionally, to pick himself back up at that particular moment.

#kylo cant write #sanders sides #remy/sleep #emile picani #keep him safe #sleep is for the weak #the remy centric prequel #tw: period appropriate transphobia #tw: rape mention #tw: rape discussion #tw: panic attack #tw: emotional overwhelm