#im not sure they're always detailed or make sense but I like sharing when something exciting happens | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wasyago · 9 months

Note

YAGO!!!! GAHFRHRHAHARHAHRHRF IM BACK (Design Detail Anon back << i dont know what to call myself LOL) I HAVE MORE WORDS

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON BIOLUMINESCENT TRITONS?!!!?! Obviously Gillion's eyes and coral already glow cause of his funky scrungly squelchy magic BUT what if... he had little glowing freckles... scales? im not fully sure how fish people work.

Your designs for Gillion and Edyn already do an amazing job of separating their underwater biology from humans like Chip and Jay (thinking of the glossy skin, the tails, and the yellow sclera/slitted eyes)- like it's very easy to tell by looking at them that while they are People they are very much FISH People. Which of course sounds pretty obvious but I mention it because a lot of triton art I see usually just looks like a blue person with gills and fins, if that makes sense.

But to expand on my original question- both Gill and Edyn are from the trench, and, in my logic, adjacent at the very least, to other deep sea creatures like anglar fish and some squids. They already have darkvision but the image of them having little hidden patterns when they get super deep in the ocean is... so cute...

im realizing after Ive written all of this that it kinda stopped being a question and started being a ramble so I do apologize :']

(on another note I love your caspian redesign it does a really sweet job of incorporating literal elements of water into his features *smooches him* **respectfully***)

OMG!!!! i love all your thoughts this is so cool thank you for sharing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (and thank you!! i tried very hard to make caspian look like a water spirit and not an ocean creature and still make him interesting visually...)

you know, now that you've said that the trench is deep under water im realizing that it's something i didn't actually think about. like, i remember hearing Gill say that he's from the trench, but it never actually registered in my brain that trench = deep and dark. everything makes so much sense now oh my god.... finn saying "why did they keep this from us" about the sun, because the sun simply doesn't reach to where they live...

i dont know why i imagined the capital as this bright white sunny coral reef when it should be dark and mysterious and harsh with no sunlight. bruh. it makes so much seeeense. and all the talk about strict rules for safety and foodchain and danger, because they're literally so deep there's a lot of giant spooky creatures.... hold on im having a worldview change.... oh god....

considering all this... YES bioluminescent tritons!!!!!!!!!!!! i imagine they don't glow too much, since while tritons are pretty smart they don't have a lot of natural protection from predators and attracting attention would be suboptimal. but they do have glowing parts for um... reasons. idk, they're magical creatures in a magical world.

i imagine their stripes and eyes and hair and underbellies all emit a glow in low lighting, and in complete darkness only the stripes are visible. and every triton has a unique stripe pattern or color so they're all different like that.

idk how it actually works. like, if they glow in any darkness or only in the darkness under water (although it wouldn't make a difference since they're always wet) or only when they're very deep or if they can choose when to glow or when to not, but its still a very cool detail!!!!!!!!!!! glowy fishy people yayyy

#yagotalk #my art #sketch #oh boy do i tag this.... its a long text post......#aah yeah fuck it we ball #gillion tidestrider #edyn tidestrider #jrwi riptide

358 notes · View notes

zombiifyd · 8 months

Note

Can you tell me your analysis of the Albatrio’s relationship? I love hearing the nuances of people’s different takes on their dynamic!

AHAIHSJEH WOULD I?????? absolutely.

this post is gonna be so long its just gonna be a bunch of word vomit i swear. so i am so sorry.

OKAY SO I'M GONNA BE LIKE,,,, breaking down all of their relationships one by one, with like two individual people and then their all in whole because its SO IMPORTANT to look at the details.

———

1. chip and jay

these two have so many dynamics. i don't really see them as brother and sister but their fights definitely do remind me of that dynamic. to me, they're more like best friends that have that close of a bond. especially because of how they met, they kind of just instantly clicked. it one of those friendships where two unlikely people have the most chemistry and it never dwindles. obviously it has to do with the fact that they go on all of these adventures together. and they probably spent a couple of days at sea before finding gillion. so they must have gotten close, even if jay was a "spy" at the time, she never really acted like she was. chip found her, and in stead she found herself. and its really touching.

i would say they're definitely the closer two of the bunch even though trust has been broken a couple of times but they always come back stronger. i really love jay and chip.

2. jay and gillion

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING. these two mean literally everything to me. (hi navyseal shipper here) i'm sure i made a post about my thoughts about their relationship on my blog once. but might as well rehatch it and apply the new things i've learned with all the new episodes i've listened to. i still think their relationship is so pure and just so UGHHHH /pos. LIKE JUST ALL OF THE TOUCHING MOMENTS THEY HAVE. but even all of the normal moments they have also. i think the whole albatrio is just unlikely people who have found each other and just clicked with insane amounts of chemistry. because even though in the early episodes, gillion was a little strange and trying to figure out this new world. jay found him strange, but fun. and a good guy.

and it shows in future episodes and even going to him for ADVICE before the block and the reveal she was a spy and everything. and even after that gillion STILL trusted her. willing to literally to everything to keep her with them. like IM TEARING UP JUST YHINKUNG ABOUT IT. "just tell me what you wan't and i'll fight for it." HOLD ME BACKCKCKC I WILAHAJWHJE i am so notmal about them. anyway yeah thats jay and gillion

3. fish and chips

hey guys. listen. fish and chips???? yeah. i agree.

anyway, they are so important to me. they have a weird relationship though, to me at least. like in the beginning they were rough and bumpy but they were still close and affectionate. and dude, let me say, that when they we're crying and holding onto each other in the mud and fighting bugs in laffinlot, they had my entire heart. but in more recent terms from where i am listening, where they were about to go to grimms party, their relationship has evolved so much?? but it had barely even changed. if that makes sense???

especially when chip now almost refuses to lie to gillion anymore. if anything, i think the ice dome broke but made their relationship stronger because gillion confronted chip about what he has been doing. and chip now kind of understands where gillion is coming from??? because gillion doesnt share much of what is in the undersea with the two other than the mentions here or there of his laws and his beliefs, and strongly believing them. and i guess chip is still trying to process that gillion is NEW to this world and everything. even now in the episodes i'm in.

they have a really interesting relationship but i cannot put it into words bc if i do i will explode. but i love them.

4. THE TRIO!!!

all in all, they're idiots who found each other and in turn are trying to find themselves in this big vast, and new, world. they are idiots who have insane amounts of chemistry even when they first met. they are idiots who walk straight into navy bases and fuck shit up bc it's what they do as the best pirates ever!!! they consume my heart and mind and they will never leave. they are a package deal and they refuse to leave one another behind because they are friends. they are co-captains. they are family. they are each others persons. and that's it to them.

okay i think i'm done. SORRY AGAIN

#quinn rambles #runs away bc i just started rambling #im so sorry (not really? idk this was so fun to do)#jrwi #jrwi riptide #jrwi chip #jrwi gillion #jrwi jay #jrwi albatrio #jrwi navyseal #jrwi mockingjay #jrwi fish and chips #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

31 notes · View notes

petruchio · 6 months

Note

hope this isn't a weird and irrelevant reply to your personal post but honestly i really get what you mean. tbh i've been there too. i get how being in a place where you're confident in some aspects of yourself and doing enviable (?) things can be pretty isolating, especially if you're (perceived as) a woman, you feel like you're good at [insert some skills that matter to you], and you generally like the way you look. it can feel like you lack empathy because you don't share some of the insecurities that people around you experience and bond over (though you may be struggling with something different that they don't get), it can feel like you can't tell if you're a good friend or not because others talk about you in terms of what you've accomplished or what you have rather than who you are as a person, it can feel like your positive emotions aren't real because they're atypical and viewed as "unrelatable" idk. i feel like loving yourself and believing in your abilities is a net good but not a substitute for being around people who actually relate to your experiences. for me it's essentially feeling likable but not understandable (or understood), and ime it's something that isn't "solved" by having a lot of friends. it makes sense if you feel like that's not enough. not sure if any of this is actually similar to what you're going through, but i hope you get the chance to be around people who Get It, and i hope you feel less alone soon. you seem like a genuinely kind person on top of being great at writing/analysis -- i love the way you write about the things you're excited about. wishing you all the best <3

it's not weird or irrelevant AT ALL! it honestly always does make me feel better when i come on here and speak about something i'm struggling with and other people say, hey, yeah, me too. especially when the thing i'm complaining about is feeling alone, it's comforting to know that other people feel the same way. like, we're all lonely together, which makes us less alone in our loneliness.

and yeah i think you're right -- confidence is one of those weird things where the more you work on it, the more difficult it can become to relate to other people. people are always telling me i'm so confident and asking my advice on things and i'm always like... idk how to tell you to just stop caring what people are thinking. i mean, obviously i do care what people think of me, but maybe the problem is that because i'm my own worst critic, i can't imagine anyone hating me more than i already hate myself, which paradoxically means that i assume everyone loves me? or maybe it's because i can't imagine anyone genuinely giving a shit about what i do, so it's easy to just do whatever i want. because it's not that i don't care what people think, but just that i pretty much assume they aren't thinking about me, so why would i bother trying to impress them? (like some of my friends will describe in detail the logic behind their instagram story posts. and i'm just like... do you really think other people are noticing this? do you really think people care that much what you, some random person, is posting? it's kind of crazy to spend so much time thinking about yourself through the lens other people. just post if you think it's funny, or don't. nobody is actually thinking that much about you.)

but to your point, i feel like that is kind of where a lot of the loneliness comes from. because people describe certain insecurities or thought patterns that they have, and i'm just like yeah i truly cannot relate to that, or yeah, i would never do that. and when i do express things i'm struggling with, people act so shocked and never offer any kind of support because they're like "but your life is so perfect!" (which is INSANE! nobody has a perfect life! and i know it sounds like the most obnoxious problem ever, like oh my life is so great that nobody believes me when i say i'm still inexplicably sad, but it is a really isolating and lonely existence!!) and then i guess it kind of becomes a cycle where people say or do certain things, i don't relate to them at all, and then i wonder why i'm still struggling so much even though i'm honestly doing fine, and then i feel guilty for even struggling or feeling down because i don't really know what else i can do to get better, since again, i'm objectively doing fine.

i get what you mean about feeling likable but not understandable. recently i was on a second or third date with someone, and i had this weird out of body experience where it was like, i could see myself doing everything right -- i could see that he was totally into me and that i was saying all the right things and laughing at the right times and making the right jokes, but i didn't feel like a person? i knew i could make him like me, and that it wouldn't even be that hard, but i knew he would never actually know me, not even if we kept dating for years. he would always have just "liked" me, like you said. it was a really weird and uncomfortable feeling. i came home and wrote in my journal "sometimes i feel like i'm so good at pretending to be a person that i don't feel like i'm actually a person at all"

SORRY for these long rambling answers. i guess i'm feeling some type of way about my inability to function normally lately. being 24 is just weird i guess. it's uncomfortable and awkward and frustrating, and so much of it feels like this sense of cognitive dissonance between being really good at acting like an adult but still feeling like you just want to scream and cry and throw things like a toddler but you know you can't. i guess someday it will all make sense. or maybe it won't. but i'll keep writing about it either way <333

#answered #anonymous

10 notes · View notes

transmascore · 1 year

Note

hiyo

i wanted to ask if you have any advice for overcoming the thought that i cant be a gay trans man because "what makes gay men gay is the fact that they only like dick and not female parts"

(im sorry if thats rather graphic but this is literally the thing stopping me from acceoting myself or transitioning socially or physically)

Something to keep in mind is that orientation is people-based. The reason gay men date other men is because they're attracted to men themselves - the way they present outwardly, the way they speak, the way they wear their hair. Genitals aren't the only or even the main part of the equation (although they can factor in). There's every other aspect about a person to consider.

I'm T4T (trans for trans) so my attraction to men is framed by that lens. I find I'm attracted to patchy facial hair and androgynous voices - things that signal transmasculinity to me. And, for me, it's because I know I will have things in common with these men. We have shared community, shared experiences. I know I can open up to another trans man and that he will understand me. And, aside from that, I do legitimately feel a strong sense of desire and romantic love when I encounter other trans men. It isn't just safety, but a genuine want to be with them.

And gay men, regardless of AGAB, feel pretty much the same way across the board. It's attraction to little details here and there, as well as the entire person, and it's also that sense of relating to one another on the basis of queerness. Knowing that you can be yourself around this person.

Now, sure, men looking for a quick hookup on Grindr aren't in the same headspace as someone looking for an actual relationship. So it's important to keep that in mind. People on hookup apps tend to be rude or chasers (a cis person that fetishizes trans people). But there are also genuine men you'll encounter (regardless of AGAB) that are totally cool with hooking up with a trans guy and aren't weird about it. Everybody's different.

And while some sections of the gay male community can come across as very phallocentric, we (transmascs) have been in those spaces the entire time.

I'll share some gay trans men now.

Billy Lane, who in 1998, WON the Mr. Leather competition:

Lou Sullivan, an activist and author who fought for gay trans men to be recognized by the medical field so we could receive gender affirming care:

Rupert Raj (pansexual rather than gay), who did so many things it's easier for me to just show you than to recap.

Dr. James Berry, an extremely talented surgeon who fought in two wars, was a duelist, and slept with men.

We have always been here, we will always be here, and we are here right now! Even though a lot of our history has been overshadowed and lost to time.

Also, something I tell every transmasc, especially gay transmascs, is this: When we first come out, first realize who we are, we feel very vulnerable. We want to be seen as people. We want to be validated and comforted. Like Pinnochio, we want someone to tell us "you're a real boy." And, often times, trans men will seek out that validation from cis men, because they view them as some higher authority - a gatekeeper of masculinity that will confirm your identity and metaphorically hand you a Man Card. And a lot of trans men get hurt, have their hearts broken, because they're putting all of their stock into this.

But I'm here to deliver you good news: Transness stands on its own, it doesn't require cis men to prop up the pillars. You are just as much of a man as cis guys are, and their opinion of you is irrelevant. It may not sound true right now - we all go through this initial stage, especially if our dysphoria is bad. But you'll get through it - and once you make it out the other side it is incredible. To expedite the process, best thing you can do is surround yourself with trans art and videos and books and friends.

The other thing, too, is that fear of not being loved. Society can have us believe cruel things about ourselves. That we, transmascs, are not worthy of love. That we're somehow inferior. And that just isn't true - there so many happy, partnered trans men out there. Many of them married! Many of them polyamorous with multiple partners! Many of them who have started families, are fathers!

Don't delay your transition - or call off your transition entirely - because you are afraid of what a future partner might think. People date each other for a reason: because they love each other. You want to find someone who will love you for you, unconditionally. And those people ARE out there. A real partner will be supportive of your endeavors, will be happy to see you comfortable in your own skin. Take care of yourself first, and the rest will come. The pieces will fall into place.

In the meantime, to be kind to yourself. Know that you are enough. Know that you are loveable. Know that you are desirable. Know that you have a future. Know that you don't need permission from anyone to be who you are. And know that you belong! Know that you're gay and you're a man and you're trans and that none of these things contradict one another. They weave together like beautiful threads to form the person that is you. And that there are many people like you - always have been. And if anyone is an asshole about it, ignore them.

#asks #anonymous

52 notes · View notes

imhereforbrownies · 1 year

Note

Congrats on 250!!! It's always so exciting to see growth 🤗

pronouns: she/her

personality: i am emotionally intelligent and easygoing. my friends describe me as someone who they can always count on to have fun with. i have adhd so i tend to be airheaded at times, and i like to make jokes despite my friends saying they're horrible. i am a bit clumsy as well so i make messes on accident all the time. I like to believe im the mom of the friend group even though my friends are more responsible than me. I've told i act like the wine aunt. I also really love crystals

Hobbies: Hiking, music, road trips, reading, crafts

Favorites: The Breakfast Club(Movie), Little Words By The Happy Fits/Thunderous By SKZ(Song), Pasta(Food), in a kayak on the river/Concerts (Place), Harry Potter (Books)

Pets: Im a cat and dog lover but i have such a speacial connection to dogs and i have a little dog named Rocko !!

Dreams: To be at peace with life and to do something that makes me happy

Zodiac: Virgo sun, Libra moon, Cancer rising, Leo venus

Aesthetic: Hippie/Acadamia

Group: SKZ BABY

Scenario: carnival date ive always wanted have one

Hello! Thank you so much for your support and for making a request! I appreciate it a lot 💗

Btw we have so much in common when it comes to our personalities omgggg! I too love Breakfast Club tbh so I'm really glad to share some interests with you as well :)

PS I'm really sorry this took me so long.

Now to your ship...

I'm pretty sure about this one and I'd ship you with Chan.

My reasoning behind it:

- you're the mom of the group, he's the dad of the group - it just makes sense, ya know?

- I feel like the two of you would really click in when it comes to your personalities and could quickly bond through that :)

- I also feel like Chan would find your clumsiness very cute and would be very understanding toward your ADHD

- road trips with Chan????? Yes, please!!!

- also I think he'd be so interested in your crystals and would definitely ask a million questions about each of them and let you explain all you know in detail while he watches you with heart eyes uwu

- he would also definitely adore your dog because we all know how much he misses Berry so I'm sure he'd be so glad to spend time with your little baby lol <3

- also you give me this kind of a sunshine vibe (??) and I feel like Chan would be so whipped for you lol I'm sorry

"Over here!"

Chan can't help but grin once he spots you sitting on the bench, waiting for him patiently.

After all the attractions you two tried out tonight, you got quite thirsty and he offered to buy you some soda so he was forced to leave your side for a while and he's really glad to be back.

"Here you go," he smiles once he reaches you, handing you the cup and you take it, looking up at him with gratitude.

"Thank you so much, Channie," you murmur, the way you're gazing at him making his heart flutter.

"No problem, Y/N," he replies, scratching the back of his neck shyly before he sits down next to you.

You two have been friends for quite a while, ever since Jisung introduced the two of you to each other and Chan can swear he's been drawn to you from the moment he laid his eyes on you. However, it took him some time to actually ask you out and when he eventually did, it was mostly because of Jisung who wouldn't stop whining about how the whole thing is definitely mutual and Chan should just finally go for it and so he did. And looking at you now, sitting next to him and playing with the straw, the cute Hello Kitty headband he bought for you sitting on top of your head as you sway your feet rhythmically, he's so glad he did.

"Where are we going next?" You glance at him with a smile, taking him out of his thoughts and he chuckles.

"You still don't have enough?" He teases and you pout at him.

"Come on! There's so much we still didn't get to try out!" You state, making him smile.

"You're right," he murmurs, making you grin.

"I'm thinking about the shooting game," you say, taking a sip of your soda and he hums in agreement.

"Sure. That's a good idea," he nods and so you jump to your feet with a smile on your face.

"I'm about to kick your ass so bad," you say with a smirk, making Chan laugh.

"Oh, are you?" He teases, straightening up too.

"You can bet," you state and he chuckles.

"We will see about that," he leans a bit closer to you just to wink at you, making your heart do a little jump in your chest but you decide to ignore it, finishing your soda and throwing the cup in the nearby bin before you approach Chan again.

"Let's go then," you say excitedly and he smiles before slipping his hand into yours, intertwining your fingers, making your breath hitch in your throat as your eyes meet his.

"Right after you," he murmurs, his cheeks tinted pink, making you think about how cute he is.

"Sure," you reply, giving him a smile as you squeeze his hand a little tighter before leading him through the crowd, a silly grin on your face and your heart racing.

You've been waiting for this moment for so long and now that it's here you can't believe it's real. But feeling the warmth of his hand in yours, you know this is no dream. And you couldn't be happier.

#skz #stray kids #skz fanfic #stray kids fluff #250 followers celebration #shipping hours #bang chan x reader #kpop #skz bang chan #chan skz

11 notes · View notes

canarydraws · 2 years

Text

I plan to clean this up but I’m so excited about how my last dnd game went down I really wanted to share! Things got a little spicy XD I guess Lucéena has a girlfriend now? More under the cut!

I’ll definitely share more once I finish the pic but, to summarize, recently my group went on a little break. Right before we left off tho, Blue, the beloved npc and childhood friend of Echo, had been abducted by her and Echo’s old slave master and we set out to get her back and kick the guy’s butt. We planned to split up to cause a distraction while some of our more quiet party members snuck around to find Blue but we ended up converging in the back of his home with no idea where she could be.

We ended up finding Blue tied up in the gardens w their old master and a fight broke out. It was rough, easily the most insane battle we’ve had this campaign. Echo went unconscious at the end and earlier Lucéena ended up dying before being revivified by our cleric. In the end we all made it out alive w some new scars (and withered hands, don’t know what’s up w that yet).

After the fight and making sure Blue was ok, Echo approached Lucéena for help cutting off her old master’s head, and while the rest took a break, the two went off to find a spike to stick it on (peak romantic activity I know lol).

They ended up talking about the fight and how Echo was feeling after it and standing there, under the spiked head of Echo’s master and his house in flame behind them, they ended up kissing. They’ve been having a lot of heart to heart convos after crazy terrible things happen but Lucéena still didn’t really expect it. She’s had a crush on Echo for a long time but I don’t think she thought her feelings might be reciprocated. All she’s ever wanted was to look after Echo and the other members of the party. If nothing ever happened she’d still have been happy knowing that she did her best to keep Echo safe, it’s the simplest way Lucéena can express her affections. But now they could be more, which is something Lucéena wasn’t fully prepared for.

They ended up spending the night together after that but they haven’t had the chance to talk about it or what that means they are. This is uncharted waters for Lucéena so I look forward to seeing how this goes!

#art #digital art #wip #dnd #dnd story #dnd art #Lucéena #I sort of regret playing an emotionally confused character lmao #she’s the worst at reading other people and she always assumes she is less appreciated than she actually is #so now she’s like 😳#it’s so weird I get to play a whole side of her I wasn’t sure I’d get the opportunity to #she’s been emotionally starved for like 5 years give this girl a hug XD #also for being an elf (and therefore being long-lived) she’s pretty inexperienced with relationships #she was always family oriented then work oriented and when her mom used to find her partners she never liked the boys #AND NOW SHE KNOWS WHY SHE DIDNT LIKE THE BOYS LMAO #worried it’s too late to find out your gay? Dw she didn’t figure it out til she was 130 #I hope people like these updates I share #im not sure they're always detailed or make sense but I like sharing when something exciting happens

68 notes · View notes

tsukishimas-shortcake · 3 years

Text

Relationship Headcanons

↦ Character(s): Hakkai Shiba x fem!reader

↦ Rating/Warning: No rating though there are some light mentions of abuse (if you have read the manga you are aware of what I am talking about, I’m not going very deep into it though it literally just mentions it), mentions of anxiety attacks (no detail though), fluff, not proof read

↦ Word count: 1.8k (longer than planned, sections are bolded)

↦ Your Momo’s Receipt: Hello~ I’m post yet another TR headcanon and this was requested by the lovely @strawbub I hope this doesn’t disappoint, it did get longer than planned but I enjoyed writing it. I'll prob do a part two that's more of a scenario based on your first date or something since I didn't go into it here. Please note: for those of you who don’t know my blog is currently under construction, meaning I will not be updating my masterlist for the time being.

So how did you guys meet, well mostly because of Yuzuha,

One day in like elementary you’re walking home and you see this super pretty middle school girl just like yelling at this small group of guys

The guys end up running off just because they don’t wanna deal with her or the attention she's drawn to them

Behind her was a boy, taller than her but obviously younger. You didn’t assume they knew eachother though.

The boy and yuzuha began walking in opposite directions because one was going home while the other was going to pick up something like groceries

You’re so entranced by how she stood up to them yet she’s a girl who was far smaller and you end up catching up to her, almost stepping on her heels

You end up absent mindedly following her into the grocery store and eventually she just freezes, turns, and stare directly at you

Your eyes widen since you must’ve been staring and she just goes “may I ask why you’re following me?” And you explain how cool she was earlier. She invites you over for dinner (esp since her older brother won’t be home) and figured it’d be good for Hakkai to meet someone his age

You end up going over but Hakkai didn’t come down to eat so you never actually got to meet him, though from then on you would see Yuzuha every so often, visit every other weekend or so

But no matter how often you came over the next few months, you never once met hakkai,

That was until you both reached the end of your middle school education and we’re about to begin high school

You had gone over because you were going to borrow an old work book from Yuzuha, and when you go to knock on the door the door opens before your closed fist could hit it, instead hitting a firm chest

You blush and quickly apologize but the person in front of you doesn’t move at all, doesn’t say anything and almost looks like they drifted into space with their dead stare

You assume this is yuzuha’s older brother because you’ve also never met him and you immediately turn to walk away but Yuzuha calls over hakkai’s shoulder

“Y/N-Chan! You just got here where are you going?” This was def not yuzuha’s older brother. There’s no way she’d be that happy with him around; oh my god. Realization hit, the guy who you hit (though it was more of a tap) was hakkai.

The hakkai you had only caught a glimpse of in yuzuha’s photos, never talked to or actually seen in person despite going to the same school and living in the same neighborhood

He must hate you. That’s why he avoids you. That’s def why - is what you think

Yuzuha drags hakkai back inside and invites you in; you sit down with them in the living room and watch hakkai visibly relax now that he’s inside his house, his own space, with a pillow behind him and a blanket covering his lower half, he almost curls up into it as he continues to avoid your stare

“Hi hakkai…Kun? Im L/N Y/N” you say and you see his face dead pan once again

Yuzuha can be heard laughing from the kitchen as she comes back in.

She leans over and begins explaining that hakkai literally just freezes with any interaction between him and girls who aren’t in his family

You nod, thinking maybe it’s an anxiety thing? Which is the case with you, but only because he’s been watching you since you’ve come over (not in a creepy way) wanting to and working the courage up to talk to you

The 5th or so time you came over after that encounter he was inches away from introducing himself before the house phone rang causing everyone to kind of “wake up” in a sense

Every time since then he gets closer and closer but isn’t able to say anything; he even realizes he has a crush on you.

The way you sit when you do homework and how cute you look when you’re focused.

How your forehead scrunches up when you’re trying to figure something out and you end up just sitting back with a small huff followed by yuzuha’s signature laughter.

It’s also a huge thing that you get along with Yuzuha.

So enough with first meeting time for the confession.

He ends up confessing accidentally. He didn’t know you were coming over to begin with so he was flustered out of his mind. And how was he supposed to know you hadn’t actually fallen asleep and you could hear him over the tv

The tv was more white noise than anything and the day was hot since it was the middle of summer causing the window to be open and the sound of soft wind and small birds to drift in; this was the hot that makes you tired so you were all sprawled out of just sitting in a daze

So while resting your head on the table you’re dozing in and out but then you hear hakkai begin to speak, something he never really did around you

Now did you and hakkai text? Yes. Did it take him an hour to reply because his brain would explode when you replied to him? Yes. But was it a start to communication? Also a yes.

You hear him say your name quietly before he moved closer, you can feel his gaze on your features

“I like you” is all he says. Simple and sweet. But you sit there in shock, trying not to blush so he’ll have no idea you heard him but he can tell because your forehead scrunches

You heard him and are focused on if you should reply or not. And he knows that.

You open your eyes and just look up at him, he’s closer than expected. His hand close to yours on the floor and he reaches over and grabs it lightly. Hoping you’ll also return the gesture by holding his hand instead of leaving your hand limp inside his.

And you do, thank goodness, and Hakkai almost mentally can’t handle it.

Once you start dating it’s more so just hanging out at his house or yours; however he talks a bit more and you text a lot more. He’s gotten better at replying. It usually takes him like 15 minutes now

He’s kinda stressed about your relationship but not due to anything you or him did

He’s stressed because of the mentality his older brother gave him

Is he even allowed to be this happy?

He finally has someone thats small enough and naive enough that he can protect you; compared to constantly being protected it’s a sudden, strong, yet good change for him

He’s touch s t a r v e d

Yes Yuzuha shows affection; but he stopped accepting her hugs when he was around 8 just because he physically wasn’t able to handle it due to his bruises and such

But with you, even with his bruises and all you take care of him. Able to coax him into using medicines and toning down the physical violence (that he can control himself)

He also finds it super soothing when you lightly brush over his scars (especially those that his brother gave him), it helps him believe that scars are only physical and can fade with help

One thing that stresses him out the most is trying to hide you from his brother. Any time you leave something at the house its easy to pass it off as yuzuha's but when it comes to things like photos he has with you, he can't hang them up, show them off, or have them as his phone Lock Screen, etc. because he just really doesn't want his brother to know and target you since he'll then know that you're his weakness (aside from yuzuha as well)

Sometimes won't explain why he can't hang out and has legit pushed you out of his house before at the last minute notice of his brother coming home

Will always make sure you get home safe though, usually by having Yuzuha go with you since then she can just say you're a friend from school

Your parents love him, though they were a bit hesitant it became a "you always have a place to stay" because they learned about their family situation from you and yuzuha. So expect him to spend the night when he's too scared to deal with his brother. Same with yuzuha. (yes I know this isn't yuzuha head canons but its hard to write for him without mentioning her when they're so close)

We're talking three person sleep overs. Yuzuha and you of course share the bed and Hakkai takes some time to even set foot in your room much less sleep on a mattress that's on the floor

He has a small heart attack every time he comes into your room because he's overwhelmed with everything, he's never been so comfortable and it makes him feel restless. Like he's never and I mean n e v e r been less stressed and slept better than when he does so in your room

The smell, the colors, just being surrounded by you is something that completely changes his mood

Once showed up after he fought with his brother, tears in his eyes and clothes a bit tattered and you just pulled him to your room, and sat down with him.

You laid on your bed with him laying down onto of you, head on your chest as you rubbed his head and only said a few words "its not your fault"

He ends up crying so hard he falls asleep and gets dehydrated and you have to make him drink a bunch of water when he finally wakes up.

NSFW

super fucking careful w you

almost annoyingly so, but you're understanding

He knows that he might be taking things frustratingly slow but he knows that since you understand and know his history that you can help him get through it

Your first time you think you'll have to call it off because he's shaking so bad

"baby... are you sure it won't hurt you?" he keeps asking.

pretty sure that's the longest its ever taken him to finish because he was so anxious

despite being so slow and hesitant, late he isn't too scared to get a bit rougher

but im not talking anything crazy im talking like he's willing to pull your hair a bit or nip a bit harder at your neck.

Please never ask him to do anything like degrade you or some type of harsh physical rough shit, he can't

like literally im 99% sure that if you ask him to choke you or something he will pass out because of the anxiety attack he would have at even the thought.

in short with nsfw though he is sweet boy. He's a switch through and through. Loves when you take care of everything because then he doesn't have to be scared of hurting you.

339 notes · View notes

pinkydude · 3 years

Note

Just because I love you and your content and racoon-boy, I got to ask you... what do you think what kind of relationship/connection did Mitch and (my most beloved) Scorpio (who died fricking too early) have?

AFHFHHF

Sooo my views on that actually evolved during the months

First few months, I actually saw their relationship as romantic-ish? And I remember seeing in the tags people that also saw it as Fruity and all afhfh so yeah I vibed with that

Now, I grew to really love the character of Mitch and of all the other Aldecaldos, with a Lot of replays of Panam's quests etc it felt wrong? To me? To slap that on their relationship, given how Mitch trust you with dealing with Scorpion etc I'm sure the guy would've told us about any underlaying feelings when sharing the beers, you know

EDIT 03.09 : AEHHG WITH NEW INFORMATIONS IM BACK ON THE “Oh they might be gay” STUFF SO I CHANGED VIEWS AGAIIINN 🤡👉👈

Lets see the Canon stuff, with some interpretation

He tell us multiple time that he is/was his best friend, we see them sharing jokes via emails, they were really friendly even in serious situation like when the Kang Tao AV was crashing and all, you can see they're obviously close

Also fhfh dumb detail but, when asking why Scorpion is called Scorpion, Mitch says something like "Maybe he had a big stinger" (cant remember the exact line in english sorry) and he doesn't seem like the kind of guy to be embarassed about anything? if he had saw his bff dick he wouldve told us for sure, like "Because he had a big stinger" or something

I haven't gone too much into it but I read some of the cp2020 Nomad lore, but from what I've read Nomads don't have taboos about Nudity, Sex and everything, they're really open (They probably take shared shower to save water in the badlands, and they canonly have a big festival where multiple games take place, with org/ies etc so, yeah)

SO FHFH Given all that ^ to me their relationship was really close, like Bros BFFs that would slap each others ass, kiss each others platonically, not afraid to hug etc etc

They also were Soldiers together, one year together during the Unification Point, surely shared a Panzer at one point (even tho Mitch was a sniper, protecting them from afar?) meaning with connected mind etc- Did they got down and dirty together? Eeh probably at some point IMO

Worth noting that, when the Kang Tao shit went down, and you save Mitch, he seem almost... uuh "already at peace" isn't right, but he isn't breaking down over his best friend death- they talked about it before, told each others how they would like to go / to be taken care of, probably told one another that they will be waiting for them, that they will always be here for each other always etc etc- I dont know if I make sense AHFHF but like, he knew and he was ready for it (Doesnt mean it doesnt hurt like hell, if you wait in front of Mitch during I'll fly away, he mutter Scorpion's name. During the campfire, he's seen muttering alone to himself- tied to Scorpion or maybe general PTSD, and he dont forget about him, mention him until the end of the game, during the Star Ending)

NOW For my personal headcanons

Its been 7years since the Unification war, and I like to imagine that's where they met? On the field, two guys with freshly equipped War cybernetics, bonding over a year etc

With friends we had this HD that Scorpion was this kind of rebel little twink that was getting into trouble etc, and Mitch took him under his wing to push his ass and turn him into a True Soldier tm because they grew fond of each other, and Mitch didnt wanted the guy to die on the battlefield, to die so fast (I headcanon Mitch as older as Scorp)

EDIT 03.09 : ^ Not anymore, reading the game script they actually BOTH came back after war, meaning they were already Aldecaldos before the Unification War.

If I remember correctly, Mitch's database entry read as "(...) he came back to the Aldecaldos" after war, so that means he was with them before he joined the ranks, I headcanon that Scorp followed him, and was kind of a "new" member. We also know Mitch is one of the most respected Aldecaldos, and he act as the "Leader" of the vet group

God this got long AUGHFHJFJD--

But yeh, like, if one of them told the other "I think I love you" in a romantic way? I think the other one would've been ok with it. They were really close, but not "officially together", just really close bros that wouldnt have minded holding hands and snuggling in public

I HOPE THIS IS Readable, I just woke up and saw this and wanted to give it some thoughts- it turned into a wall text LMAOOFVFV

THANKS YOU FOR LIKING MY BOY AND MY CONTENT

*I Feel like I need to write this here but- if you ship them romantically thats valid as fuck, as well as if you see them as bros or anything- I'm just sharing my own vibes and views on it! Please don't deform my words, this is not in ANYWAY the truth and only my own vision

#cyberpunk 2077 #Mitch Anderson #Scorpion #Driss Meriana #Aldecaldos #Long post #Ask #Anonymous #THANKS YOU This was a cool questiooon #I just woke up and I dont have all the words to express myself correctly sORRY FOR MY ENGLISH #but yeah I could talk about the Aldecaldos and this game for hours fhhf deadasss #-waiting for a dumbass who can't read to pick on that post to say I manipulate people somehow hah #personal #Mitch Lore

14 notes · View notes

bigskydreaming · 3 years

Note

Continuing on that observation because I forgot to add this part, as a gen z I'm glad you understand that we or young people don't invent new ways to be evil, but it's not completely true. You aren't seeing new forms of online abuse in every platform, I doubt second hand information is going into details as well. Also the fact that you are a white man, there are things being said and done to poc in various online communities that I don't expect you to be privy to. Harassing fans of color and poc media has become a lot more common and normalized which parts of the fandom at large will never see. I don't know if anon did all of the thinking before saying "gen z bad" but they're not completely wrong looking at the kind of mass bullying behavior literal kids are exhibiting. They are learning from or being encouraged by older people but that shouldn't take the focus away from them to blame only the older people.

And my ask regarding Barbara, you assumed I hadn't thought about if my disdain for the character could have come from ableism. I had tho, granted you couldn't have known that and it was surely a possibility, so I'm not saying I'm mad about it, I was at that time a little bit. But you could perhaps give your anons a little more credit sometimes. Sometimes people know what they're talking about, you don't need to explain other possibilities to them each time.

Once again, sorry if this came off as very rude I just needed to share that observation and among many other instances these two were really highlights and kept bothering me. My issue with Barbara goes in a different direction than anything to do with her appearance and I've personally faced online abuse from people younger than me in ways that technologically, even politically, wasn't possible or as easy a few years ago, so you can maybe see why...

Please keep in mind that whatever context you have for yourself or your ask when you come into my inbox on anon......I have none of that. You have an awareness of yourself relative to whatever you asked me. I literally only know an anon by the words they put into my inbox and nothing else.

Also please keep in mind that every anon I answer, I do so in the larger context of my own interactions with tumblr overall. I have a lot of precedent with things I say being taken out of context, misrepresented or even just me not conveying myself as well as I like.

So the combination of those two things is that a) I literally just don't KNOW what any anon does or doesn't know and b) If I'm going to answer an anon, I tend to want to answer as fully and clearly as possible.

I can understand it coming across as being talked down to, so I'll work on that, but I would ask people to remember the above and keep that in context too when weighing my responses.....am I actually being condescending in every case, or does it simply feel that way because I'm including stuff you already know in my response? And if its the latter, is THAT something I COULD know about you without knowing who you are or you as a person and not just a paragraph sent in anonymously?

I'd rather be safe than sorry, and so from my POV since there's no harm in somebody seeing someone cover information they already know as PART of their overall answer or response, like, there's no reason for me not to include whatever I think is relevant and just expect readers to decide for themselves what about my response, if anything, is helpful, and like....just ignore the rest, y'know?

Also, just for the record, I am ADHD and I save my medication for when I'm working or writing or have stuff I absolutely need to get done, which doesn't include my usual blogging. So I'm usually posting while not on my ADHD meds at all, hence the rambling tendencies and the length. Another aspect of ADHD that doesn't get talked about much ime is we tend to over-explain, part out of just excitement/interest in whatever it is that has our attention, and also in part because we're used to people not necessarily following the leaps our minds take when jumping around rather than proceeding in an orderly thought pattern.....so, part of why I break things down so incrementally is I literally just don't know where my way of looking at things diverges from the way neurotypical thinking views things, so I want to draw as detailed a map as possible in order to ensure the most people possible can follow my thought process, just in case.

(And again see, this is something you might already know, and hell, you could have ADHD yourself, I just literally have no way of knowing that so rather than just mention it and be like "oh and also I have ADHD and so that's something to keep in mind" I'd rather explain WHY I feel that's particularly relevant to your question, since I'm kinda like, why not answer as fully as I have the spoons for? People can stop reading at any time if I go on too long. Its fine).

As for the specific asks you're referencing - my response to the gen z anon was not meant to convey that the sort of things you're describing don't occur among gen z, so sorry for giving that impression. Its actually the opposite of my point, which was simply that I don't think its a generational thing, or that anything is gained by treating it as a generational thing. This kind of behavior exists in gen z, yes, but it also existed before gen z. Its not gen z SPECIFIC, or limited to just that generation. That's all.

And the other ask, the one you made about Barbara - to be honest, I don't have anyway of knowing for sure which one you meant, and there are a couple it could have been, but if its the one I THINK you're referencing, I believe you asked how to stop people from assuming you dislike Barbara for reasons rooted in ableism when its because of other things? If that's the one, then I mean, the thing is....I DID answer your question, in as much as anyone could. I addressed the perceptions other people might have of your stance there, but basically - there IS no way to ever ensure people take you at your word or any kind of guarantee you can present your POV in a way that won't be misrepresented or misunderstood. So ultimately, I just had no real useful advice for that?

And so I expanded into the only thing I think anyone CAN control, aka their own thoughts and words, and suggested that you just double check to be sure of your own possible biases that others might read into your words without you being aware you were putting them in there. That wasn't meant as an insult or to suggest you hadn't already examined yourself for possible ableism - it was simply saying it never hurts to check again, y'know? We don't always catch everything every time we do a self-review, and internal biases are inherently tricky to pick up on ourselves. And it just loops back into the fact that I really had no way to know what you had and hadn't already considered, you're essentially a blank cipher to me....and in my experience, a lot of people are a lot more ableist than they realize.

And this isn't an insult either! It applies to me and I'M physically disabled! I'm constantly to this day unpacking new realizations about how I still have more ableist views and opinions than even I realize, even after about five years of living with chronic pain, vertigo, nerve issues and associated problems stemming from only half a working mouth lol. I'm not trying to insult people by asking them to just do what I do every day and just like....make sure I'm not the problem when other people have a problem with me. Because sometimes, even after reflecting as fully and genuinely as I can, I think they're still wrong! I don't have to agree with their conclusions! But that doesn't mean that they're never right.

And for the record, I do think its still worth examining on your end, because I don't love that you said your issues with Barbara have nothing to do with her appearance, when we're talking about ableism specifically. It very well could be just a poor word choice on your part and not a reflection of your actual views, but it could also be a suggestion that you tend to think of physical disability as something that's limited to there being a visual sign of, and there's a lot of invisible symptoms and changes to the ways a disabled person interacts with society and society with them that don't alter a disabled person's appearance in anyway...and many of these things are the exact stuff a lot of unacknowledged ableism revolves around.

So I'd like to give you and other anons more credit and the benefit of the doubt and assume you know what you're talking about and don't need things broken down as much as I tend to break them down to - but keep in mind I don't OWE you that, and its a lot to ask someone to take you on faith when you've already made the conscious choice to present yourself to them anonymously, and deliberately limit how much a person even CAN know about you before answering, when you have an equal opportunity to present yourself by name, allowing someone the full context afforded by your blog, that they can use to familiarize themselves with you and what you likely do or don't know before answering. I don't think its entirely reasonable to anonymize YOURSELF and then expect people to still give you the benefit of the doubt.

Especially when not giving you the benefit of the doubt only really results in me over-explaining something you don't think you need explained in certain ways or in as much depth. Its not hurting anyone, and you're not going to be the only one reading this response and maybe that over-explanation ISN'T something other people know and it could still be of use to someone else, y'know?

But lastly, please keep in mind that you came to me, and I just answered in the way that made the most sense to me. If that didn't work for you or wasn't what you're looking for, that's fine, but like. You knew way more about me going into this interaction than I could possibly know about you, and assuming good faith of you and your interest in my response and giving you as much of a response as I did in the first place, let alone now, IS giving you the benefit of the doubt in the sense that I'm assuming you can find some way in which these responses are of use to you.

And if not, like....just don't send me more asks? LOL. I kinda feel like you just didn't expect the answer you got, and that's sitting weirdly with you. Which I get, to be honest, but I don't particularly think that's a me problem, because that has nothing to do with anything I can control.

I can only give the answer that occurs to me when I read and think about an ask. I can't guarantee it'll ever be the answer the asker actually WANTS.

3 notes · View notes