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#im only partly kidding
hey-scully-itsme · 1 year
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wish there was an aubrey-maturin tv adaptation so i could make an edit of stephen and diana set to 'your type' by carly rae jepsen
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starryaike · 7 months
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I can't breathe
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theokusgallery · 4 months
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I freaking love your au and your latest comic because MAN
I FELT THOSE LAST WORDS AND I WAS LIKE "OH FUCK"
First panel was already a bit unsettling itself - like you get it's just intimate manners as you do as a couple but he felt so possessive already and
Sunny's inner thoughts
I'm sure 100% his abandonment anxiety will increase drastically the more he stays with nick and honestly slay
I mean it's kinda obvious
But like I felt that
Yeah
Nick is unhinged
Nick is crazy
Y'all are gay for him
Good 😵💥
Sunny has soooo many issues. So many of them. He's so vulnerable and he makes himself vulnerable to Nick while still being intimidated by him, it's... Dude's got some problems.
#ive talked about mental illness and nick before but not sunny...#well. only a bit. ive said sunny's autistic#but he's also got other problems-- such as abandonment issues as you said#sunny's very insecure in relationships - partly because he has a very limited experience with them#and partly because he has self image issues.#when you grow up as an undiagnosed autistic kid you tend to be very aware you're different while not knowing how to change it#everyone thinks and says you're weird but you have no idea what's weird about you so you can't even try to fit in#a friend of mine told me once that she thought i was so brave for not being scared of being different in middle school#i wasn't. i wasn't brave. i just had no idea why people thought i was weird#sunny in this au knows how deeply different he is from other people but he doesn't know /what/ makes him different or how to change it#and as a result he just doesn't open up very much. he's very reserved and doesnt talk to many people. he has like two friends total#which also conviently makes him easy for nick to isolate#sunny also has bpd! and he gets deeply attached to people who show him any kind of affection very easily#as i mentioned before he also tends to fall for people who intimidate or scare him -- people he sees as mentally superior to him#his self image is constantly oscilliating between 'im the greatest person to have ever lived' and 'im the worst thing to have ever existed'#he's extremely unstable. he has mood swings. he gets obsessive easily. he seeks out relationships with mostly toxic or older people#he doesn't have a good support system. he's socially anxious and an introvert. he's openly trans. most people think he's weird.#he has no stable sense of self. he has panic attacks. he's both hypervigilant and oblivious to lies and attempts at manipulation#all of this makes him a very easy target for someone like nick.#at least- at /least/-- nick genuinely loves him.#ask#tosteur-gluteal#rant#arsenic#i start talking about psychology and i get lost. my apologies
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piningprecussionist · 1 month
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Kim you a Kamen Rider fan
Uh, no? Don't think so.
Name sounds vaguely familiar... one of the other clowns around here might be acquainted with it.
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I didn't really watch too much TV as a young kid? I liked to mess around with my kit or go fuck around in the forests, for the most part. I started watching stuff more in highschool and college.
Some stuff I enjoy, or enjoyed, off the top of my head- Batman: The Animated Series, Are You Afraid of the Dark?, Buffy the Vampire Slayer... There are definitely more things that I watched, but I'm not sure what all I really stand by enjoying... sometimes, you just watch something because it's so weird it fascinates you, ya know?
#ooc: name sounded familiar so i went to look it up. kinda get the impression that it's probably not something she watched- partially due to+#+ runtime/reception i think. unless i misread something#ooc: LOOKING UP SHOWS THOUGH I MIGHT BE GOING A LITTLE UNHINGED... SOOO MANY THINGS I WANT TO GIVE HER...#ooc: I DONT CARE IF ANY OF THESE MAKE SENSE ACTUALLY IM GIVING HER MY MEDIA TASTES THEY KINDA ALIGN. FUCKING. BITE ME.#((ooc: the last comment is about Dinosaurs. if you are unfamiliar. look it up and then stare at the costumes for a minute syckdhdkhfjfh))#(ooc: fun pine facts! my family has that series as a DVD set and has for Many Years now- so that IS a show i watched as a kid actually)#(ooc: i did also watch buffy- though i only watched B:TAS more recently)#(ooc: someone has a hc in the discord that scott went to college to be a cartoonist- so her watching it is partly just i see no reason she#+cant be into animation and partly maybe Scott could've watched it? ik he's more of a marvel guy but the animation is good- he could have +#+ watched it just for that! and kim would have indulged him and actually come to quite like the characters maybe)#(ooc: also i love are you afraid of the dark... i havent seen very much of it but i own one of the dvd sets and i was OBSESSED as a kid. +#+ loved it more than goosebumps but i could never find any more CDs :( so if anyone knows where i can watch it online--)#(ooc: also! i havent watched it so idk if Kim would- but Sabrina the Teenage Witch. thoughts?)#ooc: also she watches Futurama because I fucking said so. i take no criticism.#ooc: it we want more things i could see her watching maybe ask abt specific ones! i could give her thoughts on them maybe#ooc: use them as an excuse to rewatch some stuff maybe xycifkchfbf#pine.txt#asks#rp#kim pine#sp comic#spvtwtg#spto#spvtw#janstaratthedisco#not in standard continuity#?
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winglssdemon · 1 year
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Disabled people on/trying to get ssi/ssdi should be able to unionize.
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genkais-arcade · 1 year
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Thanks for posting that t-shirt link and thank you for making gifs! Every YYH post I see is +1 to mental health
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<3 <3 <3
Running this blog is like, my 13-year-old self's dream! It makes me so happy and the act of making gifs can feel very zen sometimes. So, its good for my mental health to create it :)
(The t-shirt link in question)
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santonali · 1 year
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2021/22 season how i miss you how i love you how i cry for you how i long for you how i worship you
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desafrey · 2 years
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witchesandstitches replied: des 🤝 dean 🤝 juliana
is...is juliana taking  girlfriend / fwb applications - 
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sparkbright · 7 months
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popular fandom swaps alex and luke's overall roles in the group dynamics send tweet
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raideo · 9 months
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This is a god damn Heaven and Hell Soul Exchange blog now sorry folks
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bellejolras · 3 months
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i don’t mean to go on a rant but I’ve been reading reviews of Poor Things bc i hate being happy and ohhhh my goddddd
spoilers under the cut but I have complaints about people’s (lack of) media literacy
Oh my god okay so first of all, if you haven’t seen a movie how are you going to comment on it. Reading summaries and other people’s reviews only is not sufficient to make an original point. you do not know what you’re talking about. just stop.
Second, the movie is. satirical. Which I thought was obvious from the absurd premise and surreal visuals? This is not supposed to be the real world. Nor is it advocating for all the stuff it shows. In fact, it’s even actively indicting some of what it shows. For example: fucked up power dynamics in sexual relationships exist in the movie, but the movie is not saying they are good, it’s criticizing them. Is this not getting through to people?
Third, and related, it’s not ! just ! about ! a sexy baby !! Partly because again, satire. But also partly because she rapidly goes through childhood & adolescent maturity. And it’s not meant to be, like, linear… the regular laws of empirical data and science do not apply to this world… so she is not in fact, like 6 when she’s having sex but more like 16. Which you could argue is still a minor, and im not disputing that, because again the movie is critical of this part and duncan is a total loser. But there’s a massive difference between the mental development of those two ages. ALSO there’s literally nothing inherently wrong with baby bella autonomously discovering masturbation. That’s extremely normal for little kids, often just as a way of self-soothing because it feels nice and not with any awareness of sexuality. And it’s fine if you thought that was a weird scene! but it’s hardly pedophilia to include in the film when the “baby” in question is in fact played by fully grown adult emma stone and I cannot believe that I’m seeing people accuse this movie of that
Fourth, if you claim your takeaway from this movie is “it wants me to believe that women’s power only exists through their sexuality” then I don’t believe you’ve seen the entire movie (see point 1). Narratively it’s only a means to an end for Bella, and when she gets tired of it, she stops! She gets bored of duncan and reads philosophy! She leaves her sex work career and becomes a medical professional! And, even in the sex scenes, while there are many, they center her and her experience, her pleasure. Yes, her tits are out a lot but the sex scenes are weird, intentionally grotesque without being violent. The montage with duncan is shot through a fisheye lens and literally pans away from the bed to focus on a bird landing in the room. Duncan can proclaim himself the best lover in the world, but he’s really not important to the scene ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
In conclusion, I know the people I’m complaining about aren’t going to read this, but just in case, I urge you to learn media literacy. And anyone else who read all of this, thanks lol!! accepting good faith discourse in the notes/replies
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rubysparx · 3 months
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Ok im gonna try and be mostly images for real this time (and im going to fail)
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"From most to least interesting, the types of monsters he likes are: dragons = animals > magical beings > plants > insects > undead > spirits." (-Dungeon Meshi world bible/adventurer's guide, page 5)
at first glance that statement is easy to dismiss, ofc he doesn't really like undead or spirits, they're not really even monsters. Just dead humans, and he doesn't like humans. But there's more to it, he hates spirits because that's what got Falin outcast by the rest of the village (to the point of their father, the village chief, sending her away to magic school to get her out).
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(Notably, the above is from the spirits chapter, "sorbet" chapter 11) but on top of blaming spirits, he also blames himself. Because it was his choice to sneak out into the graveyard when he heard there was a spirit there as a kid, he took his sister with him. He got attacked for his arrogance, and Falin saved him, revealing her powers to the villagers who never saw her the same afterwards. "If only I had been the one eaten by the dragon" "If there were only some way for me to take your place, then I would gladly"
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So much of Laios' feelings of guilt and shame are directly tied to Falin. He feels guilty for being alive. He feels guilty for leaving the village and leaving her to eat alone for such a long time. But he also feels guilty for letting her run away from magic school and come to the island with him. It all just feels like a long repeat of when he let her come to the graveyard with him.
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"she could've had a better life at the academy" "I left a year before she did"
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He likely even blames himself for messing up her opportunity at a job he recommended to her when her gift was first revealed.
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"Adults are just scared of magic" "laios grew up somewhere humans hated other humans for any reason they could find, so of course he hated them right back, esp being so othered already. and then seeing his sister be so othered, and partly blaming himself for it. Of course it was his fault, of course he was so hateful, he's a human after all." <- something relevant I said while talking about this on disc
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and I don't wanna hide this in the tags, one last comment, I feel like it's important to note that in the fourth image posted above (Chapter 88, Winged Lion 3, page 17) Laios is witnessing Falin be shoved away from playing with another kid from the village, due to the village seeing her as a freak. The rest of that panel is humans doing bad things directly to him, but that one it's to his sister. But even still he left her alone in the village, what a very human thing to do.
Also, if you enjoyed this dive into Laios might I direct you to this post about representation of autistic anger? I really liked it and will be reblogging it in a few minutes
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starluvsx · 3 months
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★𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐣𝐞𝐜𝐭
𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 𖦹 𝐏!𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤
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proofread:YUPPP
word count:1.4K
WARNINGS:swearing?thats rlly it
A/N:i wanna do more headannons and stuff like this.this was rlly cute and fun to write.also I look wish the baby project was like a thing at my school but we don't even got working lights in some of the bathrooms soooo.
nick
you guys turned to each other as soon as the teacher said you could choose parameters
y'all were so convinced you would be great at taking care of the kid
you were wrong
You guys didn’t know you were supposed to change the baby until one of your friends told you
the first night nick took the baby too his house and left it on the kitchen table for six hours
he didn't realize he left it there till his mom came home from work and heard crying
you left it in your backpack twice
people said you were starting to look like an actual mom because of how stressed you were over this robot baby
almost set the bay on fire then you guys were trying to make pancakes
"so then I told her I was like why the fuck would you-"you began before you realized neither of you had the baby.you looked around before seeing the babies head dangerously close to the fire coming from under the pan in the stove. "Nick oh my gosh!"you said as you shot up from your seat at the table, grabbing the plastic baby from the counter. “you almost killed her!"you dramatically said as you cradled the baby, touching it's now warm head lightly.you didn't let him touch the baby for the next 2 days.
"y/n I have to hold the baby eventually,I don't wanna fail."He tried to negotiate a few days later.
"only if you promise not to put my baby's head near an open flame again."you asked him to do while rocking the baby.
"bitch im not gonna burn your baby."he joked, making the two of you laugh.you then handed him the baby, still smiling at your best friend's stupid joke. as soon as the baby was in his arms though it began to cry and wail. "Actually you can have your baby back"he said before handing it back to you jokingly.his gesture made the both of you laugh even more.
you guys got a C+, partly because some of the babies' hair was a little burnt.
Matt
treated that baby as if it was real.
literally named it Issac
set timers for every time he had to feed it and change it
The baby had a built-in voice box to make him laugh so he loved to make it laugh and giggle.
wouldn't let the kid go
had to stay on the phone with you on the nights you kept the baby
like the whole night
there was one time where you forgot to feed the baby and he literally freaked out
on the last week of the project he realized he didn't wanna give the baby back
you were already done with it though
everyone at school said you guys were like actual parents by the end of it
you didn't even realize how attached he was to the baby until you walked in on him sleeping cuddled ups that the baby
your phone rang from inside your pocket.the gas station you worked at was empty at the moment so you didn't hesitate to answer it. "Matt" read the caller id, confusing you because he knew you were at work but you still picked it up nonetheless. "Hey baby."he said into the phone.
"hi matt, what’s up,i’m at working right now so I can't talk for long" you explained as you saw a car pull into the parking lot.the headlights standing out in the darkness
"Well i was just wondering if you wanted to come over after your shift, i got some snacks but nobody to share em with." he asked cheekily though the phone.the people from outside stepped into the gas stations mom and her daughter.you laughed at his slyness until faint baby cries in the background.
"Is that isaac?did you forget to feed him?''you asked worriedly through the phone.the mom and her daughter looked at you confused as your young face was talking, presumably, about her baby.
"No I just have to change him" he explained through the phone.shuffling could be heard from the other line before you could say anymore.matt letting out a dad like groan while getting up made you smile to yourself.
"ok yea i'll come over in a little, probably like 9:30, is that okay?"you asked through the
phone.he mumbled a small 'yea thats fine' before we said 'I love you's and 'goodbye's and hung up.the lady and her kid coming up to the register once I put my phone in my pocket.
later
I let myself into the house and was greeted with Mary Lou and Nick watching a movie in the living room. "Hey guys,"I said sweetly, smiling and waving at the pair. They greeted me the same way before I asked "is Matt in his room?"
"Mhm" Mary Lou hummed. I walked down the hall till I made it into his room.i knocked on the door before opening in slowly.i was met with matt sleeping soundly,plastic baby cuddled up to his chest.i giggled a little before taking out my phone to take a picture.
Once I snapped the picture I tapped him on the shoulder lightly to not scare him.he fluttered his eyes open and looked at me tiredly. "oh hey babe" he mumbled out while sitting up and looking around wearily. "Was I cuddling with the baby?" he asked,confused at the doll that was in his now unraveled arm.
"yea you were"I laughed out before moving the 'baby' and climbing into bed with him.
"I was wishing it was you"he said as he pulled closer to him.the little comment making me laugh lightly.
I turned my body to face him before asking "so where are the snacks?" which made him
reach over to his bedside table and grab some chips, candy and 2 sodas.
"right here"he said while smiling and kissing me on the cheek.
you guys got an a+ on the project and your teacher even said you would be “perfect parents one day"
Chris
he actually asked you to be his partner instead of it being the other way around
It was way more stressful than you guys thought it would be
First you guys lost the bottle for a whole day
Literally looked up and down to find it but you just actually could not.
Turns out Chris left it in his locker
He def posts pictures of him and the baby with captions and stuff saying “ me and @youruser babyyyy” and “I think she looks more like me but idk” on instagram and snap
Was actually a very good parent despite thinking he wouldn't be
Dropped the baby like twice though
He also bought like little clothes for the baby so she wasn’t just walking around nakedly
you were so confused when he brought them home
when he would play video games you would tease him and ask him to "not swear in front of the child"
both of you ended up very emotionally attached to the kid
was very committed to being an actual dad after the fact
you guys were tired.watching a movie in chris' bed after a long day at school wasn't the best idea for staying awake.but while you were very tapped into the movie, you could also simultaneously feel his eyes boring into you.you didn't know why but also didn't think much of it.he's always been a bit of a starer.
you decided to continue focusing on the movie until it was abruptly paused. "hey why'd you do that?"you questioned.looking over at the boy who had been looking at you most of the night.
"Wanna have a kid?"he asked.the question leaving you stunned and confused at the sudden idea.kids had always been a possibility in both of your minds but it never something that could manifest into a real physical thing.
"Right now, like at this age?"you asked him to clarify.
"well now, in a years, five years, i don't really care"chris answered
"definitely not now, maybe when we're older with a house, a steady paycheck and you know, a high school diploma."you attempted to explain.
"I can't wait that longggg."he whined
"Well I definitely can,"you sassed. "Now turn the movie back on, I wanna see how this ends."
"probably with them having a baby."he joked under his breath as he reached for the remote to do what you asked
"chris you've seen this movie before you know how it ends"
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mamawasatesttube · 4 months
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hi im lost in the kon & clark + kon & the kents sauce today.
thinkin about how clark takes him to live with ma and pa shortly after "our worlds at war" - after kon has lost guardian, and now mickey and dubbilex and everyone he knew at cadmus has vanished and left him on his own. after he's been used and discarded by knockout, tana, and rex leech. he's not even two years old and there is a whole list of adults who he relied on and who he's already lost because, as he believes, of his own inability to be what they needed him to be. he wasn't savvy enough to realize rex was using him for money, he wasn't heroic enough to save knockout from herself, he wasn't mature enough for tana to love him, he wasn't good enough of a superhero to prevent guardian from being killed in the leadup to everything with apokolips...
anyway, what i'm getting at is that he's used to nearly all of his relationships with adults having a time limit, and to being left alone to fend for himself when that time limit runs out. so, uh, the first time he has any sort of argument with clark, or clark expresses any frustration with him...
which, imo, is extremely possible because, like. kon's an impulsive kid who doesn't always listen to others or ask for help when he needs it (partly because he's so used to fending for himself!) and clark definitely has a protective streak, and i think it'd frustrate clark that kon didn't even tell him he had nowhere to go after cadmus went underground. like he gets that kon's got issues but also Please For The Love Of God. People Who Love You Want To Help You But You Have To Tell Them You Need Help. he wants to help and protect kon but kon doesn't even realize the things he's gone through are fucked up and that he shouldn't have had to deal with them, let alone on his own. suggesting that he should lean on others would make him bristle. and he definitely doesn't want to be a bother or a burden on superman.
so it's a point of contention but like, the love is there. it's a point of contention BECAUSE the love is there.
anyway i'm just thinking of the first time clark tries to talk to kon about opening up and asking for help and telling him or ma or pa or lois when something is up, and kon getting mad at him because he can handle himself and he's not incompetent, and clark being like that's not what i'm trying to say at all, i'm plenty competent and i lean on people when i need to and so should you. but kon's a traumatized and headstrong teenager who doesn't want to hear it, even (especially) from his idol, and clark gets a little frustrated, and then kon ??? stops arguing and just gets really disproportionately upset out of the blue??? and shuts down and then runs off??? and clark doesn't understand what happened exactly but clearly SOMETHING is wrong. figures he'll give kon some space and talk to him again in the evening when he's had a chance to cool off.
instead not even an hour later martha kent hollers for clark to get over to kansas and explain his side of things because she KNOWS the boy she and jonathan raised would Never have told kon he's sick of cleaning up his messes and wants him out of his parents' house and might even be planning to take his name back from him. (clark, hearing this: HE THINKS I WHAT???????? D: D: D:)
(ma sent pa to check on kon when he didn't come down for dinner and pa found him sniffling and stuffing clothes into a suitcase. he said clark hadn't told him to get out yet but it was only a matter of time. they are gonna have a nice long family heart-to-heart and at the end of it pa is going to have to talk ma down from hunting down rex leech with a shotgun.)
anyway kon gets a Really good family group hug that he TOTALLY doesn't cry about (he's cool as a cucumber about it!! really!!) and gets whacked across the head with a boatload of affirmations and reassurances that even if any of them ever argue, his place here and his name and status as part of the family are never going to be in question. (ma wants the shotgun again when he seems genuinely surprised by this.) it might even be the origin of them coming up with "conner kent". a second name just for him, as part of clark's family on earth too.
i am just. so not immune to stories about a little guy who's not used to having a family Getting A Family you know?????
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darling-i-read-it · 1 year
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Reunion
Trevor Philips x fem!reader
Word Count: 5k
Warnings: smut, unprotected smut, gta5 story spoilers, 
Author’s Note: I am very aware this is the randomest thing to post. I have been replaying gta5. I am in love with Trevor. He’s my best friend, he’s the funnest to play, and I need him (nefarious motives). I unironically have a part 2 to this I’ve half written where the reader and Trevor meet up with Michael so let me know if anyone is invested <3 This is partly inspired by me going into the strip club to go to the atm and then going batshit insane. i am no better than a man but it is never the women im objectifying.
Summary: The reader did the original heist with Brad, Michael and Trevor. Afterwards, when everyone got split up, Lester told the reader that both Trevor and Michael were dead. After the jewelry store the reader wonders if he was lying about both of them. The reunion is filled with anger and also long lasting tension. 
I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director/creator
(not my gif)
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“You see him at all? After the incident?” Michael’s voice trailed off into a feign disinterest. Lester and him both knew; this is what the conversation had been leading up to. The conversation had dissipated away from the task at hand, casing the jewelry store. Neither of them seemed to care. 
“I kept tabs on him for a while. Needed to know that he didn’t blame me,” Lester complained, reminding them both of the idicotic ways of their former friend. 
“Yeah, where’d he go?” Michael questioned, trying to be nonchalant. 
“North, south, east, west. Wherever there were liquor stores to turn over and hitchhikers to disappear.” There was a beat of silence as Michael climbed further up the roof to get a better vantage point. The words could have remained in the air, if Michael hadn’t pushed further. 
“Where did they bury him?”
“They buried him? Not as far as I know.” 
He wanted to ask. He knew he had to. 
“You see her?” 
Lester was glad Michael couldn’t see his face. It was a knowing look. Oh God, Michael wanted to talk about her again! Something so familiar that it didn’t even seem out of place, not even after everything.
“No. She left all together.”
“She still…she still around?”
“She’s alive if that’s what you’re asking. Moved, made a better life for herself. Better than he could’ve gaven her. Or you for that matter. Still got the bullet wound to prove she was there though. Physical therapy for months on that shoulder.” 
Michael was hit with a sudden pang of nostalgia. He thought about the pandering, the vein attempts to make himself look better for you. The fight’s he and Trevor used to have all the time, arguments on who deserved you and who would get you. He had hoped you were oblivious. Now he wasn’t so sure he believed that. 
“I told her he was dead.” 
Michael paused on the roof, his movements only momentarily stunned. 
“You feel bad about that?”
“It was the only thing to do. She would’ve found him. They would’ve found you. Bad for everyone.” 
“And especially your cover.”
“Especially that.”
You were living a life where both he and Trevor were dead. You had moved on because it was the only thing you were able to do. He yearned to know what it could’ve been like if things hadn’t gone to hell. The danger was intoxicating but never as intoxicating as you. 
He thought about Amanda. How she had never been you, how that’s the reason he was never able to love her the way he wanted. Clearly she had never loved him quite as much either, as was the case from her tennis performance. You were out there somewhere. 
“I don’t wanna know,” he decided. If Lester told him even the smallest thing, a job, a marriage, a kid…he would go looking. He knew himself better than that. 
“I wasn’t gonna tell you if you asked.” 
Another short beat. He was almost to the highest vantage point. 
“She deserved better than both of you. But you have to know she would’ve always chosen him.” 
“There’s no need to hash up old shit okay? I was just asking to see who was still around. There’ll never be a better get away driver than her.” Even his deflection felt fake and vein. Lester saw right through it but decided to let it be. Michael thought of Franklin, diverging his thoughts. He could have him work, train him, mold him. He huffed as he got to the highest point. 
“Now just to take a picture of the vent up there,” Lester said, evenly. The conversation was over. They wouldn’t talk about you or Trevor again today. 
-
You were sitting at the small dining room table of your apartment. It was more of an island honestly but you called it the dining table because it was the best you could get. Los Santos was an expensive city and you were lucky to have found a place you could afford at all. Not that you weren’t doing well here.  
The television was on to the news, though you weren’t necessarily paying attention. You poked at your mashed potatoes, proud of yourself for making anything tonight. You grabbed the remote with the intention of changing it to a shitty reality TV show when the screen shifted. ‘Breaking News’ painted the bottom of the television in red. A man was speaking but the volume was too low to hear it. You turned it up, out of sheer curiosity. You were reminded of a life before this one, a bang of guilt in your chest that you had desperately tried to get rid of. 
Was it the guilt that brought the nostalgia forward? Or was it the way they reported it to be set up? Was it the cars, the hacking, the timing? Was it the sheer familiarity that made you sit forward? Or was it the fact that looked exactly like a Michael Townley job? 
“You forget a thousand things everyday,” the witness said, shaken, “make this one of them.” 
Your food was forgotten. Your face had gone blank with confusion. 
“That motherfucker,” you muttered. The urge to throw something came back with his face in your head, the funeral you went to, the life you left. You saw his face on a big portrait and cried in front of it, wishing you had been faster. You left before ever seeing if anyone held a funeral for Trevor but now you wished you had stayed. What if you had spent all this time alone when they were out there, somewhere. What if Trevor was still alive? 
The TV was now a ghost. It was now a time long forgotten. It was the bullet wound in your shoulder that now ached, something you hadn’t felt in a long while. That jewelry store was in Los Santos. It was here. Michael was here. 
Lester told you him and Trevor were dead. 
You searched for your phone. You didn’t have his number anymore, you couldn’t. He had changed it. He was too smart to keep the one he had years before. You recklessly searched anyway, knocking over the chair you were sitting in, tossing your pillows aside. Finally you grasped the phone in your hand, frantically searching in your contacts. His name remained, under L, and you called the number. It rang and rang and rang. You were already starting to think about how you would find him when the line picked up. Your breath caught. 
“Y/N.” 
“You fucker. You motherfucker. You fucking fucker.” You almost didn’t recognize the voice coming out of your mouth, you were so dedicated to the rage you felt. It was almost Trevor’s, almost the same cadence that you had picked up from him. It was amazing how fast all of that came back to you. How, just like that, you were her again. You weren’t her anymore, even when you took a turn too fast or knew the fastest routes out of an issue. 
“What are you talking-”
“You know what I’m talking about,” you seethed. You failed to think about how he had kept the phone just for you, just in case you needed him one day. It didn’t even cross your mind that Lester had loved you too, that they all had. You were friends in the purest sense of the word. You were all each other's people. Now, you hadn’t heard or talked to Brad since he was arrested. Now you were a different person. 
Lester was laying low but he still answered your call. 
“I don’t know-”
“Is he dead?” You couldn’t say his name.  
“Michael? “
“No.” 
“I don’t know.” 
“I don’t believe you.” There was a bitterness in your voice you almost didn’t recognize. Her, her, her. When did you stop being her? “Lester tell me the fucking truth.”
“I don’t know. I used to follow him but there was no use.” 
“What do you mean you used to follow him?” There was a long pause. Too long. “What do you mean?” You sat down slowly on the chair by your island. You grabbed the edge of the counter. Your knuckles were strained. “Did he live?” 
Silence. 
You were gonna kill Lester. You were gonna kill him and you were gonna enjoy it. 
“Where did you see him last?” 
“Sandy Shores. But that was ye-” You hung up the phone. You should’ve asked about Michael, you knew you should’ve. You wanted to but the anger was too much. If you saw Michael now, you’d kill him with your bare hands. Sandy Shores was not a large place. And you were a determined person. 
-
Trevor looked in the mirror at the tattoo he had for Michael Townley, his dead best friend. His formally dead best friend. On his other arm was a tattoo for the only girl he had ever really loved. She was supposedly dead too. 
He broke the mirror with a fist. His knuckles started to bleed from the glass cuts. He ignored it. Ron was standing in the doorway, shaking, leaning over. Trevor almost made a shitty joke about his posture but for some reason, he didn’t. He had already sent Wade to find Michael Townley but he had kept you to himself. He wanted to find you but he’d do that with his own two hands. No one else needed to know you were out there. If you were out there. A Townley job did not mean you were still alive. Just because Michael lived didn’t mean you had. 
“What the fuck do you want Ron?” 
“Sorry boss.” He moved out of the doorway, down the steps outside. He looked around eagerly, glancing back at Trevor but not holding eye contact too long. Trevor followed him outside and walked past him. “Bikers had been scoping out here while you were gone.” 
“Did you tell them to fuck off?”
“No?” 
“Well next time, tell em to fuck off!” Trevor approached his truck with the intention of going to the city himself to find Michael. Michael would know if you were alive. 
Trevor thought about that time little. He thought about leaving his friend, about the bullets that flew past him, the moment he knew he would never see you again. He thought about the bullet wound in your shoulder, the one in him, the wounds that will never fully heal. A constant reminder of the near death experience he lived through and shouldn’t have. In drunken nights he always wished it had been you who was in his place. You would’ve made a life. Had you made a life? Had you done it without him? 
He hopped in the truck. He needed more booze. 
“Where ya going boss?” Ron questioned. 
“Bar.” He started the engine. It rumbled to life underneath him and it was already hot from the heat. He turned his head to Ron. “Get lost Ron.”
Ron nodded eagerly, already starting to stumble away. Trevor needed to clear his head. He needed to cloud his head some. He pulled away, mentally going through the map closest to him. If he went to a strip club, he was extra sure not to think about anything else. But the better booze was always cheaper at just a bar. If he went all the way to the city he could search for Michael at the bottom of a bottle. 
All of those options seemed like good options. He wanted to beat the shit out of somebody. He should probably stay in Sandy Shores to do that. But where’s the fun in doing what you’re probably supposed to do? He made a sharp turn, almost running over a girl crossing the street. 
“Hey don’t you see I’m driving here!” he yelled, feeling better already knowing he had probably ruined someone's day with their near death experience. 
“Watch where you’re fucking going! Jesus Christ, some people don’t know how to fucking drive,” you called, anger lacing your voice.
The cogs turned at the same time. 
You were standing on the side of the road, in the dust of the truck. You stopped walking completely, replaying that voice in your head again like it was your favorite song. The familiarity ached at you. You knew it the second you heard it. 
Trevor had gotten about half way down the road when he hit the brakes. Hard. He was in the middle of an intersection. People were honking at him but he just sat there, both hands on the wheels, eyes squinted in confusion. 
With ease he put the car in reverse. Much to the dismay of the few drivers around him, he backed up. You were staring at the truck as it did so, not sure if you should laugh or cry or yell or have any reaction at all. 
He stopped beside you, head turned. You stared at each other for a moment. Eyes so familiar it was like coming home after a long time away. Like the feeling of your own sheets but someone else had made the bed. 
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost sweetheart,” he hummed, his voice as cocky as it had always been. “Which can’t be true because if I remember, you’re my ghost.” Your lips parted. You approached the truck and he let you, wordlessly. You were in shock. You were stunned. There had to be a word for seeing a ghost from your past you thought was dead. You wrapped your fingers around the edge of the door. 
“You motherfucker,” you whispered, in awe. 
“I’m the motherfucker?” 
“Yes.” 
“I’m not the motherfucker.” You wanted to hit him. You wanted to kiss him. You wanted to slash his car tires. You wanted to take him home. 
“I thought you were dead. I mourned you, Trev.” The car behind him honked. Neither of you had even noticed they were there. You both turned and it was like you were possessed by your respective ghosts. 
“Can’t you tell we’re having a fucking moment?!” Trevor yelled. They honked again. Trevor pulled out a handgun. You watched him wordlessly. He shot the window. He missed. The car quickly diverged around and was gone in the dust again. You opened up the car door, his gun still smoking. He watched you, eyes curious. He thought he had memorized your entire body but now that you were there in front of him he realized his memory had never done it justice. You shut the door behind you and turned to him. The hand with the gun was slung against the passenger seat. 
“I need a drink,” you muttered. He chuckled lowly. 
“My girl.” He started to move forward again. Closest bar would do, he decided. 
-
Lester wasn’t sure if he should even tell Michael. It was probably for the best that none of them had any contact for a while after the robbery. He had set that rule himself. They would lay low, stay straight, stay away from each other. Still, after the phone call with you it seemed stupid to not let Michael know, in some capacity, that you were going to be looking for him. Maybe he was more worried about you finding Trevor and then dealing with the aftermath of the havoc the two of you could bring. 
Lester stared at his phone. He could text Michael. He could call. He could drop a place to meet. He knew that his friend would come if he asked, ever the rulebreaker. If you and Trevor remerged together that would be bad for everyone. That was bad for this whole thing. 
Lester finally picked up the phone. He decided a text would do. 
She knows. 
Michael picked up his phone. He had been desperately attempting to hide from his kids and Amanda. He was glad for it, honestly, that the life he had chosen had chosen him back. But when he saw the text from the number with no photo with it, his jaw tightened. He had told Lester he figured Trevor was dead but now a risk was going to have to be made. You were out there and you were either looking for him (which was bad) or Trevor (which was worse). 
Trevor and you were better off thinking the other was dead. The world was better for it. The money, the people, the general crime rate were all better for it. 
“I want the TV,” Tracey said, approaching him. Her voice was muffled. It was like he was hearing her from underwater. “Dad. Give me the remote.” He looked up at her then, eyes still wide from worry. She made no note of his mood. He handed her the remote. He stood up, grabbing his car keys from the side table. 
“Where do you think you're going?” Amanda questioned when he ran into her in the hall. He didn’t come up with an excuse fast enough and the judgemental look in her eyes creeped in.
“Gonna try and find an old friend,” he admitted. 
“Yeah? How old?” Amanda dripped in annoyance. Did he mean a stripper? Did he mean a criminal? Somehow she knew it would negatively affect her. 
“Old.” He pushed past her. Amanda looked at him and knew there were only two options to that answer. Neither were good. 
Michael opened his phone to Lester’s number. 
Where? 
-
You sat beside each other in a bar that wasn’t memorable, drinks in hand you didn’t know the name of. You sat as close to him as you could get, legs touching. You didn’t want to ever not be touching him again. 
“I had no idea,” you told him. “Lester told me you died.”
“Fucker.” 
“I know, I know. Trust me, I’ve got a bullet with his name on it.” You took a sip of your drink. He looked at you, watching eagerly. You looked different. Well, you looked the same, but the clothes you were wearing were different. You must’ve had some sort of office job that required clothes on you he had never seen before. You used to steal his shit all the time, when it was clean. “I’ve got seven bullets for Townley. I’m makin sure that motherfuckers dead this time.” 
Trevor smiled. 
“Fuck girl, I thought you bled out from that shoulder wound. I thought I left you there.” 
“You did leave me.” He glared at you. You had told him to leave and he did, only after you begged. “Lester told me you were gunned down in the escape.” 
“You saw the fucking jewelry-”
“Yup.” You shook your head. “Bold of him. Really bold.” You finished your glass. You pulled down your blouse at the shoulder, revealing the bullet wound scar. He put his hand on your shoulder. He hadn’t touched your skin since seeing you again. It made you shiver. He poked it, making you roll your eyes. “Don’t be a dick.”
“All I know how to be.” 
He rubbed it with his thumb, shaking his head. 
“Looks like it hurt.” 
“Yeah well.” You put your sleeve back up. 
“So you haven’t seen him?”
“Nope. Went to find you first.” 
“I’ve always been your favorite,” he bragged. You rolled your eyes, a sly smile playing on your face. It was true. It had always been that way. “You got any leads?” You were more reliable than Wade. 
“Lester know’s where he is. I was gonna pay him a visit anyway.” “Well there’s no time like the present,” he offered. You gave him a look. He couldn’t read it. People skills had never been something he was particularly good at. You tilted your head. 
“You haven’t seen me in nine years and you wanna go find Michael right now?” 
His eyes went wide. 
“Nine years and she finally admits it.”
“You knew it then. Don’t pretend you didn’t.” He did remember it. He remembered all of it, every second of it. He leaned in. 
“I’ve got a shitty trailer with a shitty bed.”
“That sounds like heaven right now Trev,” you said under your breath. He had been wanting to kiss your lips as long as he had known you. It took so much of him not to do it all the time when you saw each other regularly. After he thought you were dead, he regretted not doing it every chance he had. 
You threw money at the bartender, too much he noted, and piled into his truck. Your lips were on each others before the car even stopped. You crawled over the middle of the truck, wondering if you would even make it to the bed, wondering if you even needed to. 
Ron came rushing out of the front door, talking before he registered, “Boss the bik-” He stopped, literally putting a hand over his mouth. It wasn’t odd to find Trevor fucking a girl in his truck but Ron knew he didn’t like to be interrupted. Trevor left your lips for only long enough to speak. 
“Get the fuck out of here Ron!” He nodded, scrambling away. You popped open the truck door and slid out. You weren’t touching Trevor for a mere moment and he grabbed you again, pulling you towards him. “You’re not getting outta here again,” he promised, voice low and threatening. You smiled brightly. 
Ron opened the door to his place nearby and peaked through the window. You were dragging Trevor behind you, hands interlocked, a puppy dog look in his eyes. Ron was used to seeing Trevor with girls. He wasn’t used to seeing Trevor with girls he liked. He lost the two of you as you entered the trailer. 
Trevor’s lips didn’t leave yours, even when the door hit him from behind. He hugged you close to him. How close could he get to you? How close could he make you so that you never left him again? 
You hadn’t expected Trevor’s lips to taste so good. You expected beer or weed or unbrushed teeth or something shitty but something about them was intoxicating. He had a firm grip on your ass, pulling you closer to him. You tripped over something on the ground. You pulled away to see where you were going. 
The trailer was a mess. There were beer cans littering the ground, half naked girls on the walls, unwashed dishes in the sink. He let go of you just to move shit off of his unmade bed. He grabbed the pictures he had of girls and tore them off his wall. 
“Disrespectful,” he grumbled, kissing you again. And just like that you could have been anywhere in the world and it didn’t matter. You had waited long enough. 
He was clawing at your clothes with one hand while the other dragged up your back under your shirt. You shoved him down onto the bed. He chuckled, falling onto his back. 
“I think I’m in love with you.”
“Think?” You crawled on top of him, cupping his face in your hands. Why hadn’t you done this before? Why hadn’t you done this so many times? His hands reached for your shirt and it wasn’t until then that it hit him. You were alive. You were here. You were in his arms. He had beat the stupid longstanding fight him and Michael would always spat about over drinks. You were here, with him. He took off your shirt. 
“God woman.”  He cupped your breasts, eyes wide like they were gonna pop out of his head. You put your finger under his chin. 
“Eyes are up here Trev.” He kissed you like he would never be able to do it again. He needed to be on top. The rising tension in his sweats were hard to ignore as you sat on top of him. He could feel your every movement. You slid your hands slowly up his shirt and then down again, fingertips electric. You hummed as you trailed kisses down his chin. While you were distracted he flipped you onto the bed. You made a surprised noise that caused him to chuckle.
“My girl.” He took off his shirt. He couldn’t remember the last time he had slept with a girl and wanted to make it last. When was the last time it was less fucking and more something else, something he could barely remember the name to? You gripped his shoulder. There was a tattoo there, your name in faded ink. Your eyebrows softened. He didn’t seem to notice. “My girl,” he repeated, whispering against your skin. 
“Trev,” you whined. He was already shimming down his pants. He kicked them off the bed onto the floor. You could feel his hardness against your clothed core. He fixed his fingers around the loops of your jeans, pulling it down with ease. You raised an eyebrow at his expertise but he was so caught up in the taste of you he didn’t notice. 
“God!” You arched your back, looking up at him with wide eyes. He couldn’t wait any longer. Without warning he was inside you, all of him. You gasped at the sudden change and then eased. He gave you no time to calm down or adjust but he was leaning over you and his lips were permanently on your skin and it was like the room had gotten ten degrees hotter in the span of five minutes. You could probably fuck around all night. Trevor could go again and again but he needed to do this right now. 
He placed a finger on your clit. You gasped, eyes locking with his. He grinned smugly. You kissed him to shut up whatever he was about to say. 
Your breath hitched as he sped up, moving his fingers wildly and without care. Somehow he managed to hit just the right spot. 
You came together, plagued by moans and spasms. 
Still inside you he smiled, self satisfied. 
“Never thought a dead guy would make you cum huh?” You snorted, eyes shut tightly. 
“Fuck you Trevor.” You were laughing through your words. 
“Haven’t gotten enough yet?” 
He collapsed beside you. You found the bed more comfortable now in your bliss. You grabbed a pillow, placing it under your head. 
“Get me a beer T. I can go all night.” 
-
When Trevor woke up you were still in bed. He had a hand on your thigh, now clothed, much to his dismay. He had no idea what time it was. You had thrown on one of his clean shirts, one of the rare ones. You were hunched over your phone, sitting beside him. He rubbed his eyes. You turned your head, realizing he was awake.
“Mornin’ sleepy head,” you said, a pleasant smile on your face. Your hair was a mess of the night. He could still feel it on the tips of his fingers. He could still taste you on his lips. 
It hadn’t been a dream. You were here. You were with him. It wasn’t a wet dream, it was reality. Just the thought made him dizzy.
“Let’s get drunk and get hitched.” You laughed gently. 
“Now that’s an idea.” He sat up and kissed you aggressively, throwing you off but not by much. Your phone fell from your fingers. You turned to him. His girl. His girl. His girl. You pulled away, much to his dismay. “I think I know where Michael is.” 
He groaned. 
“You had to remind me.” He fell back onto the bed with a flop.
“Los Santos. There’s a Michael De Santa with two kids and a wife. Amanda.” He perked his head up. 
“You check the plastic surgery records?”
“I did not but I have a rough estimate.” You stood up. The bed was cold without you. Couldn’t you just live forever like this? Why go find Michael at all? 
And then he remembered his anger.
“They’re living in a mansion, Trev,” you said. You hadn’t taken any money from that robbery. You couldn’t, it wouldn’t make any sense. But Michael was out there and he was using that money somehow. He had taken it all for himself. 
Trevor’s anger intensified. He was here in the slums of San Andreas in a shitty trailer. He had put his life on the line. He had lost everything he cared about. Michael got the house and the family and the life they had all risked it for. He had lost you for nine years. 
He tossed you the truck keys. 
“Start it but don’t drive it,” he said. You rolled your eyes. 
“You think you’re a better driver than me T?” You both sat in the memories of you driving away with money, evading the cops, knowing nothing but the danger in your speed. 
“I’m the only one that drives that truck.” You put your hands up in surrender, backing out. 
“Yes sir.” 
God he wanted you back in bed. 
Part 2
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just-null · 6 months
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ooh hb noritoshi in a grimreaper's outfit ? 🎃
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WE'RE SO BACK W THE COSTUMES I HAVENT FORGOTTEN. these are taking a lot longer than anticipated, partly bc I want to draw Noritoshi in these costumes for a bit.. but im still going strong
I love grim reapers!!! I completely forgot abt their existence until you requested this! I felt like it was too plain with just a robe, so I modified the outfit a bit. and yes, that's body paint. and yes, that's supposed to be a harness. that scythe is probably fake...... it just looks real...... probably plastic....... i doubt ppl would feel safe if Noritoshi was seen w a huge sharp weapon considering he looks like he has his eyes closed 24/7
[Doodles under the cut!]
shout out to Miwa and Todo, my other two favorites from Kyoto! I like them all!
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bro tbh, if noritoshi were a grim reaper, there'd be so many lost souls out there. me included. YOUR ASS SEES THIS DUDE WHEN YOU DIE, ITS LIKE WAKING UP TO AN ANGEL TF.. guiding you to the afterlife, my ass. why would you wanna leave this fine as hell man?
OH, THE OTHER KYOTO KIDS ARE TEASIN HIM (except miwa) WHEN HE FLOUNDERS AROUND TO GET IN CHARACTER IT'S SO CUTE. F UCK
DOES THE LAST ONE COUNT AS SUGGESTIVE???? DONT LOOK AT IT TOO LONG. YOU JUST SMOOCHED HIM THATS ALL.
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heh. Noritoshi's hands aren't as smudged as his face bc he didn't want to ruin the bodypaint himself, but you really think he's strong enough to decline a kissy??? fucking wrong. his ass probably thinks his face is only slightly smudged up.
👏 congrats
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