#im so stupid for jeopardizing it

[radioconstructed]

Did you think romance was like... real before you realized you're aro? I thought it was all people copying movies when I was a kid lmao

⌖ I thought they were EXAGGERATING! Perhaps to emulate the movies, SURE!

⌖ You see, I've been known to GET A LITTLE STUPID for sufficiently CHARMING individuals! I assumed that's what everyone ELSE was experiencing! I thought THAT was the extent of romance! I simply thought I was UNIQUELY INTELLIGENT for NOT making disadvantageous choices 'out of love' like the rest of the public! HAHA!

#// by 'get a little stupid' she means QP affection/crushes! #⌖ online #⌖ answers #anonymous #⌖ aro #she means like... sometimes people make decisions that are not the best bc they're in love. she can get stupid but when she sees ppl like #idk make decisions that jeopardize or uproot their career or friendships or familyships without sufficient payoff she's like '????' #'im quitting my job to move in with my bf across the country. he has no job and lives in his mom's basement' 'uh? why?' #'bc we're in love?' 'ah so you went full stupid. got it.' yes she's judgmental (though less now than she used to be lol)

[yutas-girlfriend]

megumi x reader oneshot

you and megumi get into an argument about your safety.

warnings: nothing too nsfw, makeout, yelling

looking him dead in the eyes, without a hint of hesitation, you notice his eyes flare like a fire being fed with gasoline. his jaw clenches and he swiftly grabs your wrist urgently and begins stomping away. a look of confusion and excitement spreads accross your face as the rest of the group begins to chatter once more.

you’ve always known how to press megumis buttons. hes an easy target, practically anything can annoy him to the point of snapping, and you fed off it. you were an excellent fighter both physically and with words, and so was megumi. you fought day in and day out since your return to jujutsu tech, but this was different. this was not a normal friend fight. the only thing you didn’t enjoy arguing about was your safety. he was no saint, definitely a rule breaker, but not in a way that would jeopardize his ability to see you again. you on the other hand, were a rule breaker without many boundaries. you often found yourselves fighting about the situations you got yourself into, and the possible danger.

he dragged you into the nearest classroom and sat down on one of the few desks. it was dark, with only the sunset shining through the windows. you wanted to get this over with, it was getting late now. you begin rubbing your temples, as he exhales sharply.

“i just dont want you to get hurt. you have to understand where im coming from, don’t you?“ he says sharply, looking at your face once more.

“i never said i didn’t understand, but i’m fine. i always am. name one time i’ve been seriously hurt.” the words sting as they come out of your mouth. you already know whats coming next. he huffs, and a small sarcastic chuckle leaves him.

“name one? just one fucking time of the hundreds youve been seriously injured? are you kidding me?” he begins standing and walking towards you, stopping a few inches from your face. “i didnt see you for months because you went on that stupid mission that almost got you killed! ” he says loudly. “what about the time you decided to be a hero and go back for that woman? or the time you jumped in front of me? you are lucky to be alive.” he says pointing at you as he stares daggers into your eyes. you’re no pussy, so you stand staring back at him, not breaking eye contact for a second. he’s breathing heavily, his arms hanging loosely. your pissed, but even when the rage he fuels you with is flowing in your veins, you have to admit hes beautiful. he has a tall, slender but purely muscular frame. his jet black hair is messy but purposely, it sits softly framing his face. his bright eyes gleam in the sun light, as the bright beams bounce around the room, reflecting off the perfectly polished button on his jacket. but by far, one of his best features, were his lips. never dry, always perfectly plump and a soft pink colour, even though he bit them when he was angry, uncomfortable or nervous. you allow yourself a swift momentary glance at his lips. his breathing hitches for a moment. shit. he noticed. he looks at yours. shit. hes still breathing as if hes angry, the rage from before still sitting with you both. you continue breathing heavily and staring at each other, but the anger is slowly fading. it seems to be replaced by something else, something deeper. lust?

in the blink of an eye, he grips your face from above as he steps forwards and kisses you roughly. you grip the sides of his neck as you continue. he moves his hands slowly downward to your hips as you press yourself to his chest. you pull closer and suck his lip gently, clearly igniting something within him. you place your leg upwards towards his hip as he moves his hands to your thighs, lifting you up and onto the counter by the wall. he moves his hands to your hips and pulling you closer to him. you grab his hair in your hand, pulling his face as close as it could possibly be to your own. wrapping your legs around his waist, you pull his hips against your own. he kisses you harder, and you let out a small hum at the feeling.

suddenly, he pulls his mouth from yours, a string of saliva between you. he looks drunk, eyes droopy and hair messy. he kisses you one more, but softer, much more tender this time. he holds your face in his hands and you place your own over top. he pulls away once more and rests his forehead against your own. “please be careful,” he mumbles, placing his face in the crook of your neck. your hands find his again, and you turn your head slightly so he can hear. “i’ll try,” you say quietly back.

he lets out a sigh of relief.

#jjk #jujutsu megumi #jujutsu kaisen #megumi fushiguro #make out #angst #yelling #oneshot #megumi x reader #megumi x you #jujutsu kaisen megumi #fushiguro x reader #jjk fushiguro #fushiguro x y/n #jujutsu kaisen fushiguro #fushi

[luvyeni]

IMAGINE UNIVERSITY BOYFRIEND JISUNG.

Meeting up in his dorm to have a study session and it's starts off that way with you sitting on his bed and him sitting at his desk. He finished his work early so he decides to start gaming, and you're still trying to finish your work getting progressively frustrated.

You decide to take a break to clear your head when you see jisung with his headset on with his eyes fixed on the game. You decide you wanna be all clingy so you start sitting on his lap (faving him) and at first it's all innocent, but every now and then you plant a kiss on his face until you start to feel needy and try to get off, so you move your hips and he put his hand on your waist to stop you but you keep going until he's pulling his dick out and forcing you to keep his dick in you while he games thrusting every now and then when he gets frustrated.

this is cute to me sorry , im not gonna hide my crazy.

like imagine your sitting at the desk with him , and he's clicking at whatever game he's play while your next to losing hair over some stupid assignment , you eventually give up , turning to see what he's doing, deciding you want to be as physically close to him as you possibly can.

climbing into his lap , he's just trying to play , moving his to see, whining "baby i can't see." so you just quickly sit down , settling back down , it really does start off innocent, you leaving kisses on his jaw everytime he scores (or whatever they do in video games idk).

then all of a sudden you start to feel needy so you slowly start to move your hip , your kisses becoming more like you sucking little marks on his neck , he finally feels you , covering his mic grabbing your waist. "not right now , please baby just sit still." and you whine , continuing on with your movements.

jisung can only take so much of this , before his pulling his hard cock out , pulling your panties to the telling you to sit on it , of course you do, but he doesn't tell you to move. "now be a good girl and sit there and warm my cock for me, if you let me play , i'll fuck you when im finished. "

you actually listen this time not wanting to jeopardize that , but that's really hard when he's thrusting up into you everytime he gets frustrated. "j..jisung." "be good baby , i told you to be patient."

after a while he finally turns the game off after what feels like hours , wasting not time , thrusting deeply inside you , making you moan , "f..fuck."

"i told you i'd fuck you if you were a good girl for me, didn't i?"

#luvyeni: nctdream hard thoughts #nct dream hard thoughts #nct dream hard hours #nct dream headcanons #nct scenarios #nct dream smut #nct dream x reader #nct smut #park jisung headcanons #park jisung x reader #park jisung imagine #park jisung scenarios #park jisung smut #park jisung hard thoughts #park jisung hard hours

[princesssmars]

wildfire

some starmora x reader nsfw headcanons

wc : 1.162

cw : nsfw content! triad poly relationship (fmf). dom!gamora, switch!peter, sub!reader. some sex position links bc i think they're fun. strap-on sex. anal. pda with butt slapping. masturbation.

an : watched gotg 3 and definitely not broken. new gamora is cool but im always gonna miss og gamora so expect more starmora stuff to come bc im bisexual and sad <3

so lets say you joined the guardians early, peter and gamora already have that spark between them and now you've arrived and thrown them for a loop.

while you and gamora are still mostly trying to deal with your romantic feelings, peter is being driven crazy by his sexual ones. he's not stupid enough to jeopardize the budding relationship he has with the both of you by sleeping around.

(not to say he didn't get tempted, there was this one chick with blue skin, big doe eyes and four arms and-)

still. he's not that stupid. but, he does have needs, so he jerks off. a lot. every time he does it he thinks about the both of you. the feel of gamora's skin when his hand brushed against it that morning, the smell of the new shampoo you pick up on the last planet. even just the memory of you two laughing at one of his shitty jokes is enough to make him finish.

not to say gamora doesn't get herself off as well. i don't think she would have that much sexual experience or at least not as much as peter does. just a brief hook-up occasionally to take the edge off. but when you complimented a new armored top she bought that complimented her arms and peter agreed with that stupidly charming yet sleazy smile of his, she couldn't help but lay in her bed that night and rub her puffy clit until she had to bite down on her hand as she came.

it wasn't long after that you all became official.

in the bedroom, gamora is a dom and peter is a switch. to her, there's something about quill commanding the team during missions and casual settings and being reduced to a man on his knees begging for you to touch him anywhere.

but don't for a second think you're off the hook. if you ever get too cocky when she's dominating peter, she won't hesitate to put you in your place. her favorite way to do it was sitting you on a cushion with a direct view of the bed, your hands bound behind your back with a vibrator stuffed inside you as you were left to whimper and beg as she rode peter into oblivion. she keeps eye contact with you while she has her hand around his threat, teasing you about how flustered you look.

gods help you when they're both in a dominating mood. it's mostly after they got roughed up after a mission or the person who hired you was more of an asshole than usual. on those days they don't hesitate to toss you around like a ragdoll and do with you as they please.

one time you were left behind to take care of the ship while they negotiated with the person who hired you, which must have gone wrong with the looks on their faces when they got back. before you know it you're pressed into an arch on your bed, gamora's hands pushing your mouth and tongue deeper inside of her pussy, as peter grabs your hips and helps you throw it back on his dick.

peter would love positions where he can make eye contact, loves the intimacy of it and loves to see the facial expressions you make. doing the counterblow or fireworks in the pilot's seat, a deck chair, or python in bed when your both craving contact. right before you both cum he'll pull away from sucking on your tits or neck to look you in your eyes, whispering "i love you"'s and "cum for me, cum all over me baby"'s as you both reach your highs.

gamora will take you in any position she can. not to say she doesn't love the intimacy occasionally as well. there have been more than a few times where she gently drags you to her room, places you on the bed, and eats you out agonizingly slow for over an hour before crawling on top of you and slotting herself over you, riding your cunt until neither of you can move from overstimulation. her faves would be 69, eagle, plain, and a full nelson if she's feeling pent up.

oh and gods help you when she gets her hands on a strap-on. she found it in a sex shop on a little excursion to a shady planet for rocket to find some rare materials for an invention. quill had seen it first, practically begging the two of you to go inside with him. while he and you were pointing at different beads and gadgets and giggling at the obscenity and absurdity, gamora is busy stalking along a back wall, looking at the different dildos and harnesses with piqued interest.

when she tells you that she booked a hotel room for the three of you for the night, you can't help but get a little giddy at the idea of another night of pleasure with the two of them without having to quiet yourself by biting or gagging. you don't expect gamora to come from the bathroom, a black harness around her hips with a long and thick dark red dildo attached to it. after she gets your consent and gets you prepped, your body is held up and squished between the two as peter thrusts into you from the front while gamora takes the back. you didn't leave the hotel room for two days.

they are very different in how much pda they like to show in public. gamora is more subtle, still wary to let others know how much you really mean to her, plus she likes to keep the romantic and sexual side of her life more private. she'll settle for soft smiles across the room, brushing her hand across yours when she walks by. if she's feeling devious she'll come up behind you while you're doing something under the guise of "helping you", when in reality she's pushing her entire body against yours and maybe throwing a small little thrust in there too. nine times out of ten it will leave you flushed beyond belief and she'll walk away satisfied.

peter is. a whore (affectionate). he is not afraid to be affectionate with you in public. hand holding, hugging, kissing, etc. you already know he's fond of slapping your ass, and will do it every opportunity he gets. if you do it back to him he will literally go like :0. definitely doesn't get a boner.

their aftercare is unparalleled. while you're coming down from your high, peter will rush to get a rag for you all to wash off the liquids and sweat, while gamora will whisper sweet gentle praises while making sure the both of you are hydrated. no matter how rough or quick the sex was. they will always end it with you cuddling in their arms as they whisper to you how much they care about you. <3

#marvel x reader #marvel #mcu #mcu x reader #guardians of the galaxy #gotg x reader #peter quill x gamora #peter quill #peter quill x reader #gamora #gamora x reader #peter x reader x gamora #starmora x reader #starmora #starmora x reader smut

[sugawarassoulmate]

im foing thru a bully!osamu brain rot so imagine samu pissing reader off somehow (like collaterally: i imagine him fucking up and KNOWING he fucked up) n is trying to do some damage control by being the sweetest he's ever been I JUST WANT TO SEE HIM GROVEL

i Imagine him to be piss scared at the prospect of u ever breaking up w him over smth he did jendkd

i am incapable of not writing a happy ending for these two idiots

words: 805 cw: fem!reader, post-love confession bully!osamu, jealousy, arguing, insecurity, implied breakup, sfw but minors dni always

honestly, bully!osamu's biggest problem is his jealousy and it's something he still struggles with even after you become official. at first, you kind of deal with it, but as his girlfriend now, you wish he'd trust you enough and get over it.

"i'm tired of having the same argument with you, again and again, samu," you finally said after so much back and forth.

he really did it this time.

you and a classmate were working on a project together worth a big part of your final mark, which obviously meant spending a lot of time together. of course, osamu had a problem with it since it was a guy.

you tried to be understanding—you texted samu every time you were with him and you always did work in the library so you two would never be totally alone. but that wasn't enough for osamu. he still found a way to get upset and grill your partner to the point where he was considering talking to your professor about working with someone else.

when he apologized for it, you, you'll admit you blew up on him a bit.

"it's not just about the stupid project, samu. but thanks soooo much for making that situation harder than it needed to be," you snap, taking him by surprise since you've never raised your voice at him.

"but what's gonna happen in the future? do you just not trust me? i'm sick of feeling guilty about something that it's my fault." after stopping for a moment and catching your breath before sighing. "sometimes i think you're never going to change..."

and osamu doesn't like that. the way the tone of your voice changed just then. panic immediately sets in when you leave the room without looking back at him.

he goes into damage control, but he isn't sure what to do. osamu's never been one to apologize before and if he did, it wasn't in words. he's pretty sure cooking a meal or fucking you won't get him out of this one.

he asks no begs for your forgiveness. it's so stupid, of course, he trusts you. sometimes osamu gets in his own head and doesn't want anyone to have you, but that's immature of him.

osamu gives you some space before he apologizes—holding onto your waist as he tells you how right you are and how he's going to make things right. first, he goes to your project partner and apologizes to him as well (it stings to do so, but osamu knows it's right)

your partner accepts and agrees to continue working with you so neither of your grades is jeopardized. but osamu knows it's not enough.

it starts with breakfast in the morning because hey, he's gifted with amazing cooking skills and he's gonna use them. osamu makes your favorite and serves it to you in bed.

the stern smile on your face tells him that you appreciate the gesture but you're still upset, which he expected.

for the record, miya osamu does not grovel, but he'd be lying if he said your words didn't scare him a little bit. sucking up his pride, osamu kneels next to the bed and takes one of your hands.

"i do trust you, baby," he breathes, choosing his words carefully so as to not upset you.

you pick at the food sitting on the tray. "it doesn't feel like you do sometimes. and it's not just my project partner, but it's our friends. i can see you getting uncomfortable when suna's around and — fuck, samu sometimes i swear you think i'm gonna run off with your brother or something."

ok, that hurt, but he deserves it.

he takes another deep breath. "i will work on it. yer my girlfriend and i trust ya," he says with a steady voice. "and next time i'm bothered by somethin', i'll talk to ya instead of lashin' out."

that perks you up a bit. "and?"

"and...i'll be better about you hangin' out with tsumu and suna. they're yer friends too and i shouldn't be so possessive."

finally, finally you give him a smile, leaning over for a quick kiss. "samu, was that so hard?" you said, running your fingers through his hair. "that's all i want to hear."

for the first time, osamu can breathe easy. the sweetness in your voice is back and you're actually eating his food — a sight he'll never get tired of. "shit, baby, ya had me scared for a second,”

your eyes harden for just a moment. “don’t get too comfortable, samu. changed behavior means more than just an apology.”

and just like that your smile is back, the revolving door of emotion gives osamu whiplash that he’s never experienced before, but he’s more than willing to work on himself if it means you’ll stay.

©sugawarassoulmate 2022 all rights reserved - please do not repost/translate my work on other platforms!

#haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #osamu x reader #osamu miya x reader #miya osamu x reader #osamu #osamu miya #🍑 #🍑osamu #bully!osamu

[leviathanspain]

Hi! Saw you were taking requests!

If you want, maybe a Daemon or Aemond x reader drabble with 'if I can't have you, no-one can'. Maybe childhood friends/ unrequited love and reader comes back in a happy marriage to someone else. Or Daemon/ Aemond had an argument with their betrothed/spouse reader and someone else who was obsessed with reader attacks her (maybe even kills her).

Basically I want pure angst! No real happy ending!

Thank you and have a great day!

let me back into your life

daemon targaryen x reader

synopsis: daemon should’ve never come to winterfell

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“why are you here?” you asked, breaking the awkward silence that had been between the two of you for the last hour. daemon had asked for you to meet him privately, and considering you were married to the son of the lord of winterfell, getting the things you asked for required no sneaking of any kind.

“i wanted to see if the rumors were true.” he whispered, and looked down at your belly, “a child..is it his?”

you scoffed, and ran a hand down the front of your belly, “yes. it is. but i see no reason why that concerns you.”

you paced the room and daemon stood up abruptly from the chair closest to the fireplace. he was standing over you, overbearing, intimidating as always. “don’t act stupid. i’ve had you hundreds of times, i’ve reveled in your pleasure as you in mine. i have good reason to ask if that is my child you bare.”

you faltered, and pushed him away slightly, moving under his gaze.

“i was never yours to have, daemon!” you yelled at him, your hands on your belly as you paced your chambers nervously. “im not the one who got married first, daemon! if you remember, rhea royce exists! she’s your wife! she’s the one you should be with!”

daemon rolled his eyes, “the bronze bitch? you know i had no choice-“

you had enough. your eyes narrowed as you moved to shove him against the wall, hands bunching into his shirt, “and you think i did?” you looked at daemon with disdain and shook your head, “you were the one who didn’t ask my father for my hand, you were the one who jeopardized our future!” you let go and daemon let out a puff of anger.

“don’t ever lay your hands on me again, woman.” he threatened, his pride clearly hurt. he fumbled for his composure as he dusted his clothing of you, and held the sight of you with little regard.

you let out a bitter laugh, “now i’m woman? not..princess? my love? issa ābrazȳrys?” you looked at daemon who’s eyes were glued to the rich rugs on the floor, “you are a coward, daemon targaryen. you were a coward since the day i met you, a coward since the day i left you. why did you come back? certainly the cowardliness didn’t leave so soon, as even now you find it difficult to gaze into my eyes.”

you were cold, “am i the mistake you made? a loose end you needed to tie up? im sure viserys doesn’t know you are here, so why go through so much just to argue with me?”

daemon closed his eyes and shook his head, “stop.” he whispered, “stop!”

the fury in his eyes faded as defeat took over. you faltered and didn’t move from your spot. your child’s feet thumped furiously in your belly, and you parted your lips to say something, “im sorry daemon. but you need to leave.” you looked at him once more before you called in your personal guard.

“y/n! please, please just let me back into your life…” he cried, but you shuddered the thought away, “don’t make me get my husband.” you threatened, and daemon quieted as your guard hauled him away.

the child you bore had white hair, a trait of his true parentage that you tried to excuse with it being something passed down by your targaryen mother. your husband believed you, but you knew that word had spread of the child, and rumors had reached the rogue prince’s ears. even in his depression of losing you, he was happy to know that at least a part of him had made it back into your life.

#hotd angst #hotd x reader #daemon targaryen angst #daemon targaryen x targaryen!reader #daemon targaryen smut #daemon targaryen #daemon targaryen x reader #daemon smut #daemon angst #hotd

[zeephyre]

CR3 EPISODE 78 SPOILERS

god. i love this fucking campaign. this one's gonna be long as shit.

despite how genuinely depressing this episode was, it also made me really giddy because i love hurt/comfort and there's no point of that if there's no hurt or angst.

im probably gonna go down the line with each member of bells hells, discussing what i can remember off the top of my head, i hope i don't forget anything in my rambles cause this was one of my FAVORITE episodes of the whole campaign and that's saying something.

i love ashton. i have loved ashton the most since the very beginning and for a lot of it i was really worried that ashton was deliberating running from opening up with bells hells while also going out of their way to have one-to-one convos with different members that were deep and insightful but never went as far as they needed to.

i am projecting a bit with analysis of ashton but taliesin does it best when rp'ing for ash and generally talking abt him in interviews. ashton reminds me of myself, which is not a compliment and is actually really terrible. ironically enough, ashton said the same thing abt fcg. i have spent a lot of time hurting myself by sabotaging the things i love, or embracing the worse parts of myself simply because it's become habit. there's always going to be a piece of you that finds the sadness, anger, guilt, emptiness, whatever -- comforting because it's all you've known.

ashton mourns a life that he never lived. i find myself mourning versions of myself that i would hate but still...yearn for them like an itch or an ache that comes from hurt. ashton wanted their family back, in whatever desperate, corrupted way he felt he should have done it, and hearing how he described feeling like he looked past the cautionary tale simply because he thought the pain they caused him should have meant something else made me think of imogen.

beautiful, sweet, powerful, dangerous, sad imogen temult. i won't comment on how everyone berated ashton because that's not really surprising nor was anything imogen said or did pertaining to ash shocking whatsoever. but... there's smth abt the destruction that ashton did to feel close to the idea of a family that doesn't really exist that just parallels so well with the fight that imogen has been undergoing since childhood. against the red storm, now against the call of ruidus, and the temptation and attachment she felt and still feels to her mother, despite everything liliana has done that jeopardizes everything imogen is fighting for.

abandoned by her mother, shunned by her own town, ignored and feared by her father.

going back to ashton again, there's smth to be said abt the guilt and shame that comes from making horrible choices that put yourself and the ppl you love in danger that forever changes the way they perceive you. I've done it. i had to fight to make things better. it can't be enough to love someone enough that would die for them, you have to fight to stay alive. if not even for yourself, for THEM.

i know it can be unhealthy to rely on others so much, but it's certainly not easy to fight for yourself when the foundation isn't there. learning how to love without throwing yourself on a blade is more important than self sufficiency. that comes afterwards.

i...don't like laudna's reliance on delilah briarwood this episode. i... there's smth very ironic about laudna being worried abt ashton's betrayal and the way he hurt her and the others with his deception and selfishness, coupled with my understanding of the absolute fucking insane, borderline stupid danger of even SPEAKING to delilah briarwood, let alone working WITH her.

i think it's hypocritical, but i don't feel any animosity towards laudna. just..sadness. delilah is a parasite. a disgusting, cruel, evil bitch who wants laudna to be... that weak little girl easily crushed under her thumb. she may preach abt laudna's latent power and potential, but laudna won't serve her purpose if she TRULY gains the strength to cast delilah aside forever. i don't think delilah was telling the truth abt their fates last episode, and that's why i so deeply want laudna to toss aside that defeatist mindset that has only gotten worse since episode one. maybe im wrong, maybe delilah was actually being genuine.

i kept watching imogens/laura's face during laudna's moments speaking with delilah alone, and it just made me sad because she didn't need to be alone. she had imogen, but she still felt the need to run and hide away. god i just want her to be happy.

i really liked the doll she made for ashton, even though delilah made it really creepy for no reason, the dramatic cunt she is. her assessment of ashton as being a child may seem rude or even a projection but to me it's the truth. ashton has not grown past his childhood. past abandonment and pain and mistrust and love that never lasts and always hurts. that shit followed them to adulthood and anyone who has any number of mental illnesses and childhood trauma will tell you that it's so easy to feel yourself stuck as a reactive, stubborn, bitter little kid trapped in a shitty cycle of pain. both ashton and laudna this episode felt like they were both broken, sad children interacting. laudna clinging to comfort from delilah, hiding away, mentally reverting to the person she was the last time she was in whitestone. ashton, clinging to his lost childhood and the acceptance of laudna's doll, the admittance that they'd never had a doll before. god... they're so sad, im gonna scream.

fcg apologizing for forcing faith down ashtons throat was sweet and so was ashton apologizing for being so bitter abt fcg's faith. now i just need fcg to apologize for the multiple instances where he put laudna in danger by casting turn undead with no acknowledgement of laudna afterwards.

fcg saying that ashton didn't love anyone or care about anyone hurt me a bit, because while i understood why they were saying those things, it was so... obviously untrue. before all of this, ashton has shown again and again and again how much he loves bells hells, and especially fcg. i know that ashton almost dying over smth so arrogant, desperate and foolish would make anyone question what someone's idea of "love" is, but still. it stung. maybe because i have been there. i know what it's like to be doubted and mistrusted because you ruined smth good callously and carelessly.

chetney... chetney really loves fearne. i don't care if y'all don't get it or if y'all still think chet is some joke character with no substance, I never understood that shit and i simply never will. chet and fearne probably have the best relationship in all of bells' hells -- and yes, that includes imogen and laudna because god knows those two have shit brewing under the surface that needs to be HANDLED, i.e: laudna being defeatist abt their relationship even tho it's barely begun.

chetney's a good man. him going after fearne was the best choice and im glad he gave her a couple laughs before she went off to wander. he cares about her so much, and he BELIEVES in her so much, and i love them. i LOVED the way he went in on ashton. hurting fearne by making a shitty decision and letting her bear the burden of watching ashton die right in front of her was... bad. it is very complicated but, that's pretty cut and dry.

i like him testing ashton again and again. telling him to leave but also being glad they chose to be brave and stay, and face the consequences of their actions. attacking ashton to see what all of any of that shit was even for. (im a little bummed that the shard didn't fully wake up yet but...i love the suspense im just impatient).

FEARNE. CALLOWAY. i love fearne, and i love the breakdown during the first part of the episode. it was such a raw moment and it established the tone of the episode so quickly. im glad that fearne knows that while ashton fucked up royally, her rejecting of the shard and complacence in ashton's plans was also royally stupid. i don't think her being terrified of taking the shard is bad or stupid, it's actually one of my favorite fearne character choices. no one ever actually asked her WHY she didn't want it, and when she said she didn't want it, it was still decided by the hells that the shard would go to fearne. (they're very shit at communication, poor babies). im happy that she specifically clarified that ashton did not threaten or manipulate her (plus he gave her many opportunities to not be involved with his bullshit if it made her uncomfy so im hoping the insane critters who keep treating ashton like some evil, predatory person finally stfu).

fearne being so scared of a version of herself that was sad, lonely, and "evil" to the point that she chose to believe that it was ashton's destiny to take in both shards is so... so rich. i hope she talks about that more in the next episode because i don't think she's EVER brought it up since exu. i don't think the shard would change fearne's personality but god the fact that SHE is so afraid of herself and what she's capable of.... AHHHH. love this damn party.

i hope liam knows that expect really painful roleplaying from him when he comes back cause i really do need ashton and orym interactions like i need air.

the choice to go to the fey realm was brilliant and i missed nana morri so it's a win for me. bells hells COULD have done what they've been doing for a while now, which is ignoring the pain they're all feeling and pushing forward, but ashton doing what they did was the straw that broke the camel's back and im GLAD because i have been begging them all to have real conversations with each other that don't get cut short prematurely for whatever reason.

i do hope that they do really lean into the self care aspect involving therapy and talking through their issues with ALL of the members present or even in groups, and it isn't just fun and games. they're prone to distraction. i love my little guys.

:( two weeks without bells hells. is it thursday, yet???

#critical role #cr3 #critical role campaign 3 #bells hells #cr spoilers #ashton greymoore #fearne calloway #imogen temult #fresh cut grass #fcg critical role #cr chetney #chetney pock o'pea #cr laudna #laudna #orym of the air ashari #cr orym #fearne x chetney #fearne x ashton #laudna x imogen #imogen x laudna #imodna #c3 e78 #cr3 ep78 #cr campaign 3 #critical role spoilers

[a-b-riddle]

A Simple (Mis) Understanding Chapter One: Location, Location, Location

John

"MacTavish," It had been about three months since the 141 had returned from our last OP. It had been a rough one and, although, we had all come back alive, we didn't come back unscathed. And we all had to thank a pretty little IT 'expert' to thank for that. Stupid fucking Omega...

"Usually I'm the one calling you. To what do I owe the pleasure?" I threw back the amber colored liquor, finishing the last of my latest bottle. It seemed all I had in my free time was drinking myself into an early grave.

Good.

"Care for a hunting trip, Cap'n?" Johnny's tone was playful, which was almost always never a good sign. MacTavish could seek out trouble like a bloody bloodhound. 

"What d'ya have in mind?" I humored. I had come home to a sedentary life style. Any ideals I had about settling down, extinguished. I wasn't as young as I used to be, but I'm still too into the fight to retire now. So whatever Johnny had in mind, surely must be something worth at least entertaining.

"A pretty little flower." He says and I swear I can almost hear the see the smirk on his face. "Stands at about five foot three. Has a knack for stabbing a man in the back right after suckin' 'im dry."

Daisy.

"You got a lead then I take it?" I try to stifle the anger as I feel it beginning to bubble. Every Alpha instinct is telling me to track, hunt, kill. Before, every biological urge I had toward our flower was to protect, keep, and fuck until she forgot her own bloody name. Now, I wasn't so sure I could stand the sight of her long enough to get the answers I wanted-- needed-- before absolutely tearing her to fucking shreds. 

"Aye." He confirmed. "Wanted to see if you were up for it before I called the lads."

"How polite."

"You're still, Cap'n."   "And I know you had more..." There was a shift in his tone. Unease as he tried to find the words, but couldn't. He couldn't. None of us could. Because none of us could describe what had happened with Daisy. Betrayal is too gentle of a word, too short and modest of a word to describe what she had done to us; hell, me. Johnny cleared his throat. Clearly uncomfortable and wanting to retract the beginning of whatever statement he had intended on making.  "Join me to settle an old debt, ye?" 

I didn't need to think twice about Johnny's officer. An opportunity to finish what we started back in Austria. I didn't regret stopping Johnny as much as I did not getting the answers I needed before the little bitch disappeared like a damn thief in the night. Now was the chance. Not only revenge for what we had been through, but the betrayal she had put us through. Jeopardizing not only the 141, but the few loved ones we had. My mum, MacTavish's sisters, Garrick's entire fucking family and the little solace that Simon had. A peace of mind knowing if he wanted to start living again, he could. All of it was almost lost. 

"You got eyes on our-" No. She wasn't ours anymore. Not our girl. Not our flower. Sure as fuck never our Omega. "On her."

"I got an address." If he noticed my pause, he didn't say anything. For that I'm grateful. I can't be weak again because some of doe-eyed little Omega. One who whispered sweet lies about how good my knot felt and all the things she wanted in life. Things we-I- wanted.  "Had an old contact have her name pop up. Hen is too fucking dense to make sure to use an alias especially considering she stayed on our side of the pond."

Don't really plan on going home after this. Not really anything waiting for me back there except some student debt. She had hid the pain of having no family well, but, now after everything, nothing seemed genuine. Every kiss, every touch, every smile and laugh she had thrown my way was now tainted.

Now it was time to bury it all.

"I'll call Garrick." That was all the confirmation Johnny would get out of me. I didn't want to seem too eager to finally get my hands on her. I needed to be collected. Level headed. I was the Alpha. I was the one my team looked to for guidance. I had already failed them once. I damn sure wouldn't be doing it again. "I'll let you convince Riley to come along."

"Lettin' me call in the boogeyman?" Johnny was smiling again. Could fucking hear it in his voice. He was the one who had probably fallen the hardest for the little bitch. Indulging him in soft touches and soothing his temper. Probably the same reason he had put a barrel to her forehead the moment she had admitted to it.

I was going to tell you. She had tried to excuse her delay as if that were the issue. I just didn't know how to tell you. But can you blame me? Yes. We could. And we did. For the shitty last seven months. For the constant worry all of us had for having to pull our mind out of the mission to worry about what was going on back home.

Her tears didn't save her. Only until Laswell came in raising an absolute bloody stink. Claims of how the very audacity to potentially injure an Omega on her team could cost her career. Fuck her career.

"Send me the details." I pulled another bottle off the shelf. Promising myself it would be the last one I had until I finally pulled that weed of a woman out of existence. Killing her meant I could finally move on. Find someone, certainly not a fucking Omega, to settle down with. I could heal from the heartbreak I would never admit to. It would be the ending that we all needed.

"Will do Cap'n." Johnny didn't wait for my dismissal before he hung up. He was just as ready for a hunt as I was.

#captain john price #john soap mactavish #john price #simon ghost riley #ghost #kyle gaz garrick #kyle garrick #omegaverse #angst #betrayal

[wlntrsldler]

poisoned mercury is so good! it’s truly one of my fav aus i’ve read in a minute and the way you write the characters is absolutely phenomenal ! i saw that you wanted some song recs for future chapters/inspo so here i am

“waste the night”/“vapor” by 5sos

>wtn is STUPID cute for luke and yn. “smoke in your lungs” is so them kissing on her their bench

> vapor i can see chris and luke writing for clar and yn respectively. like luke and chris just giggling and writing a song for their girlfriends is so cute

“perfume”/“cigarettes and wine” by del water gap

>perfume i can see luke writing as his first song out of writers block, after yn beats him in another game of pool in her cabin and he’s so enamored with her and she’s cocky about beating him and its cute and still ‘will they won’t they’

>cigs&wine i see as them having a full blown camp rock moment and they sing a duet last day of camp (although yn isn’t musically inclined, i picture her still being able to carry a tune)

”girlfriends” by the academic

> ITS SO THEM I CANT EXPLAIN IT

“lover” by the hunna

> luke writes it for their 1yr and it’s cute

hope these help with some inspiration and what not! keep up the great work!! can’t wait to see where it goes :)

OH ANON MY HEART IS SO ?!!?!!!!

waste the night/ vapor by 5sos

i love how we all collectively agree that poisoned mercury is 5sos in an alternate universe (especially 5sos in their self titled and sgfg era lol)

im definitely thinking of doing small blurbs of luke x five star interactions in between the longer chapters now because waste the night is SO perfect for them 😭

thinking of luke realizing that he needs to let five star call the shots in their “relationship” because he has a track record of failing at relationships and the last thing he wants to do is mess things up with five star before it even begins.

and five star is waiting begging for him to make a move because she realizes no matter how hard she tries, she was falling for luke castellan. but bc of her past, she’s afraid of making the first move.

the lyrics fit both of them in very very different ways, but they’re both just love-struck and pining and ugh!

for vapor, i can see luke and chris (both equally whipped for their girls) thinking about what will happen to their respective relationships when they leave chb. long distance isn’t easy. being the gf of a guy in a band came with it’s own problems. they both know that five star and clarisse trust them that they won’t cheat or do anything to jeopardize their relationships but they still cant help but worry about it :(((( (my angst sleep paralysis demon is clawing at my brain)

perfume/ cigarettes and wine by del water gap

perfume is set after r u mine? in my head!!!! i won’t say too much about this one because this will probably be one of the extras i write in the future hehe

cigarettes and wine is post chb!!!!!!! when poisoned mercury is back on tour and luke is missing five star extra. they definitely wrote it together because even tho five star isn’t musically inclined, i like to think that she can write (or at least says things to luke in a poetic way that inspires a song)

girlfriends by the academic

luke writes this about five star!!!!!! this is their song!!!!!! this is literally them ur so right

lover by the hunna

ONE YEAR OF LUKE AND FIVE STAR WHO ELSE CHEERED??????

“they’re not used to our ways” is def the public causing a commotion that luke castellan is in a COMMITTED relationship like the whole world is shook

“that makes me a better me” YEAAAAAAA THIS GOES FOR BOTH OF THEM!!!!!! they’re always better when they’re with each other. soulmates if you must.

anon, you are god-sent. these songs will go into the poisoned mercury playlist i’m creating. thank u for these song recs!

#frances replies #i love luke castellan #luke castellan #poisoned mercury chats

[lemontreefantasy]

Sails and Anchors - Part 2

wc: 6.4k damn this is long

genre: fluff, smut, angst

warnings: mentions of mental illness, robberies, gunshots, choking, overstimulation, rough sex idk (?)

taglist: @corvidqueen319 @katelynnsqueendom​ @marievllr-abg​ @eclecticranchzonkcookie @supernintendobabe​ @stayoffmybyunsworld​ @ateezourstars​ @voidcupidz​ @seonghwarizon​

A continuation of Part 1 - Abandon Ship

Part 2 – Batten Down The Hatches

After becoming friendly with one of the top army majors in town, an old friend from high school reappears. The merchant’s ball is soon approaching and brings along bittersweet events.

a/n I know I took super long to post this but it’s my child at this point I’ve put so much time and effort into it lol im sry, also please like AND reblog!

How could you miss such a handsome face like his around town? Did you ever notice him come to the bar? You had never seen him around town until your encounter with him that day. Then again, you never really ventured out too much to come across any army men either.

“Shall I accompany you to your destination?” he asked

Honestly, with a face like his, you would just be downright stupid to deny a request like that. You also figured it would probably be good to make a connection with him in case you ran into any trouble at the bar. You spoke with him as you both walked along the port, with the vast ocean in view.

“Of course,” you complied giving him a shy smile. “So Seonghwa… are you from around town?”

“Yes, I am, actually. Born and raised.” He walked alongside you with one hand on his holster and the other behind his back.

“Oh really?”

“Why? Not much good-looking militants out here?” he joked with a slight chuckle leaving his lips. You noted his cocky tone but chose to dismiss it as a joke.

“I don’t really waltz around town a lot. I usually spend most of my time at the training headquarters near the central palace teaching the newcomers.”

“I see. Haven’t really seen a face like yours ‘round here so…”

“I actually finished my day’s training and decided to take a trip down to the merchant markets. It’s been months since I’ve explored down here.”

“Months?”

“Yes, months. It may seem like a lot but I don’t really have time to venture out most days. Before being transferred to the army, I served on the naval ships for a while. The ones that would be out for months and months. So.. not much time spent on land, you know?”

“Oh wow, navy and army. Damn.”

“Damn, indeed. Enough about me, how is business?”

How’s business? How did he know about the bar?

“Wait I’m sorry… do you know me?” you questioned him.

“Of course! Everyone knows you, you’re the boss, aren’t you? Or… boss… lady? Right?”

“Well, yeah. Didn’t think I was that popular though.”

“I’ve never seen you before, only overheard some colleagues talking about you. They didn’t mention how beautiful you were though” he said to you in a deep voice, giving you a wink.

You palmed off the compliment, as you normally did with most men, even though his words gave you a butterfly or two in your stomach.

“What did your colleagues say?”

“They were speaking about how some no-good thieves robbed you all. But don’t worry, we’re looking into it.”

“Oh… yeah. That shook me up a bit, I won’t lie.”

“Have you had any repeated experiences like it since then?”

“No, not really. I mean, shoddy men come in all the time but they mean no harm. It’s hard to tell who has bad intentions.”

“I hear ya. But if anything like that happens again, send for me right away. Even if you need someone to hang around for safety’s sake. We’re trying our best to keep the community as safe as we can right now. If things only escalate, we can jeopardize the merchant markets, the sea ports… it would all be just a big mess.

And of course… I wouldn’t want you to get hurt.”

There he goes again. Slipping in those innocent lines. For some reason you couldn’t seem to believe anything a man said to you after hongjoong left. You were not going to be that naïve this time.

“Thank you, that really means a lot to me. I do have watchmen but they’re like family to me now. If something happens to them I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself.”

“I understand.”

When you approached the tavern, you invited him in for drinks on the house. After all, as cocky as he is, the man did save your life. You fixed him a beer and sat with him as the business was a bit slow.

“You know, I knew your father.”

With eyebrows raised, he piqued your curiosity. “You did?”

“Not personally, but he and my father got along quite well. They would meet at the merchants’ ball and have long discussions about politics and the economy, things like that.”

“Ah, the merchants’ ball that he never took me to.”

“I’m pretty sure you’ll be invited this year. It’s happening next month at the central palace. My father always took me with him but I was never really interested.”

“What did your father do?”

“He was an investor. He tried to get me into it but I was more interested in exploring unknown territory and making a life for myself.”

“I feel like my father never took me because he thought he would be around. Sadly, you never really know when your last day is.”

“I’m sorry, he really was a good man. A man of his word.”

That evening you and seonghwa spoke for quite a while. He stayed with you until it was time to close and made sure you wrapped up the day without incident. You appreciated the gesture but didn’t put your full trust in him, after all, you had only known him for a few hours.

~

A few months had passed. A huge election took place which booted the current serving government and led to the installation of a new one. One with promises to make the streets safer, promote business among merchants and boost the number of visitors who came to buy and sell goods. Fortunately, those promises were not empty and for the first time in a very long time, things seemed normal again. You were less worried about being targeted, more foreign visitors came to the tavern and business was alive. As a result, the merchant’s ball was pushed back until the new government had settled in.

Seonghwa was promoted to a Major and as time progressed, you had realized how well-respected he was among his colleagues and most townsfolk. Servicemen knew him as the sharp-shooter who had golden aim and businessmen knew him from his father’s successful investment portfolio. Commoners knew him as the handsome patrol guard. He would often visit the tavern closer to weekends to have a drink or two but his visits were more frequent as the weeks went by.

There was still, however, no sign of hongjoong. You remember the letter he scribbled before he left.

“Please do not despise me. I love you with every fibre of my being”

But there was only so much you could take. How long do you have to wait for love that is not even guaranteed to last? Being with hongjoong still felt like a fever dream. But that dream was slowly coming to an end, withering away, flames fading.

On the other hand, you and Seonghwa had grown closer. Much quite like the opposite of hongjoong, dare you say. He always made sure to visit you ever so often when he had time, whether he was just coming for a drink alone or with colleagues, or just making sure you were okay during his occasional patrols. Hell, he even broke up a few barfights on crowded nights on his own accord. Seeing him in action like that… you had to check the wet spot in your knickers. It was certainly a sight to see.

However, you kept your walls up but as time progressed, Seonghwa kept breaking them down one by one. He made you feel secure and protected. He was someone you could always rely on when you needed it and you knew you could tell him anything and he would never tell a soul; your secrets were sure to be safe with him. Not to mention a part of you inside melted a bit whenever he would smile at you. You remember times when he would come to see you after closing hours. He would take you for a walk along the dimly lit dock and tell you stories of his navy days while looking at the moon’s reflection dancing on the ocean. Some days he would take you out for picnics in the botanical gardens where you would spend the day in the sunlights taking in the beautiful flora. When you were with seonghwa, you were at peace. He was your anchor on your turbulent days and the relief you needed when you felt alone.

~

At the end of the week, the both of you went out for dinner in the town. Seonghwa had mustered up the courage to ask you on a date to which you accepted. You thought that if anyone deserved to go on a date with you, it was him. He treated you with respect and always made time for you, and honestly, you were curious to experience what the night would be like. Dinner was lovely and afterwards, the both of you went back to his house to relax and have some wine. His home was quite large, as you had expected, and contained mostly wooden furnishings and high ceilings. He took your coat and hung it on the carved coat hanger and sat you down on a velvet burgundy couch in the living area as he fetched the wine from his cellar. You try to make yourself comfortable in the new environment and in no time, he returns with two glasses and a bottle, pouring you a half glass of red wine. After setting the bottle down, he saunters over to a small table and picks up a peculiar, pastel green envelope and hands it to you.

“I was given the opportunity to personally give this to you, miss y/n,” he smiled, handing you the envelope.

“What’s this?” you asked.

“Open it.”

“On behalf of the ministry of trade, we cordially invite you to join us as we celebrate the success of small-business owners at the annual Merchants’ Ball,”

“So, it’s that fancy, is it? God, what do I wear? Is it really formal? What do you even do at these things?”

“Relax, it’s not that bad, just wear something nice. Guests mostly go to catch up on old times or network with new people,” he explains taking a seat next to you after pouring himself some wine.

“Are you going?”

“Why? Does that matter to you?” he asked in a playful, nagging tone.

“I was just asking…”

“I am going, actually. I don’t want to but it would be good to show face, you know?”

“Oh, really?”

“Would you like to go together? You can keep me company for the night while I introduce you to some of the merchants. That’s if you want of course.”

You hated to admit that he was right. You despised big social settings with hoity-toity businessmen who thought they owned the world, not to mention how bad your social anxiety would be if you went alone. You really had no idea who the other town’s business owners were. You were always busy in your father’s own business or your schooling that it was never a priority for you.

“That would be nice, thank you.”

Seonghwa gave you a small smile, knowing that his request was successful, “you know I’ll always be there for you.”

A bottle of wine later and the both of you were now tipsy, heads dizzy, jokes and giggles fill the air. Seonghwa notices you gazing at him, admiring how handsome he was, how he made you laugh and he slowly leaned in and gave you a light kiss on the lips. It was so delicate and slow. You felt your cheeks burn and your heart beat so hard you swear you could hear it. Raising your hand to caress his jaw, he returns the gesture, putting his fingertips on your chin. The kiss deepened as he sucked on your bottom lip, prodding further as he felt your hands slip down to his chest. You wanted him so badly, so you took him. Pushing him into the back of the sofa, you hoist one leg over him, sitting on his lap facing him. You hold his face in your hands and kiss him once more. Seonghwa took the opportunity to trail sweet kisses and love bites down your neck and on your chest. You loosen the straps of your dress so that it fell over your shoulders. His doe-eyed expression turned you on as you lowered the top of your dress to expose your breasts. Licking and sucking on your buds, he sneaked a hand up your long skirt and began rubbing your clothed clit.

“Fuck yes seonghwa,” you moaned.

Humming around your nipple he lowered his tone, “that’s right baby, say my name again.”

After moaning his name a few more times, he had enough and carried you bridal-style to his bedroom. Laying you down gently, he climbed over you making sure his knees parted your legs. His stare on you was  hungry like if he was the hunter and you were his prey. You had no complaints whatsoever as the look on his face was enough to send you over the edge. Stripping you of your underwear, he made no hesitation in parting you and licking your folds, making sure his lapping on your sweet bud. A loud scream escaped your lips as he moaned into you, adding two digits into you one by one. Soon enough he had you at your peak, curling his fingers up into you. He noticed you gripping onto the sheets, toes curling and your back arched and continued his pace as your overstimulation only turned him on more. Your legs closed in on his head but his tongue still had access to that sweet spot of yours. You had to physically pry him off of you for  him to give you a break. He gave you a few minutes for the stars in your vision to dissipate before he lay next you, kissing you once more. You grasp his member, now red and rock hard, patiently awaiting your attention. You pump him in your hands for a few minutes while trying to handle seonghwa’s tongue down your throat.

“I need you to fuck me,” you whispered in his ear.

“You’re going to have to ask a little nicer, baby.”

“Please, seonghwa. I need you inside me now,” you cry out grabbing onto his chest.

He flipped you onto your stomach and positioned himself behind you. Like a natural instinct, you were on your knees with your back arching into the mattress. Shifting your weight to your forearms, you feel his member gliding through your folds. You hear a him spit on his cock before he slowly breached your walls. He notices you fisting the sheets and he hears your quiet muffled moans.

“Tell me darling, do you like that?” he says as he pushes further into you.

“Fuck yes, I want it,” you manage to stifle out

You feel his hand run down your back towards your hair where he grasps a good handful and uses it as leverage to fill you to the brim. He finds a rhythm of deep, stable strokes that send you into a daze. Your juices coat his cock as he strikes your ass with one swift motion, begging him for more. The sweet sting and the burning in your core were enough to send you over the edge. Moans and sweet nothings spilling from your lips.

“Cum on this cock, darling. I want to see you cum.”

Again, his overstimulation kink kicked in and seonghwa didn’t stop until you were a convulsing little mess under him. After coming down from your high, it was his turn. He turned you onto your back and re-entered your soaking wet cunt. He leaned over you and locked you in place. Your legs were suspended in the air and his hands hooked under your back to grip your shoulders. If you thought the previous position was intense, this one was worse. With seonghwa’s face hovering over yours, you watch his face contort as he slammed into you, desperate to orgasm. One hand over his back and the other on his neck you whisper in his ears.

“You fuck me so good, seonghwa. Give it to me,” and with that, you feel his pace weaken as he buried his face into your neck and spilled his warm seed in you. You closed your eyes and drank in the sound of his breathy moans as he collapsed beside you. A few minutes later he sprung back out of bed to clean you up before falling asleep in his arms for the rest of the night.  You weren’t exactly sure what to label this relationship with seonghwa as, but as for tonight, it was simply just drunk sex to you.

~

Later that week, you set out into the city to find an evening gown for the ball. You enter one of the popular boutiques and a nice lady greets you. “What can I help you with today miss bosslady?” You recognize the nickname but can’t help but wonder how much people really know who you are. Even in the city?

“Hello, I’m looking for an evening gown for the merchant’s ball. Can you help me find something?”

“Of course, love. We got lots of new styles for ya.”

After trying on many cheesy, lacy, awkward fitting dresses, you finally decide on a simple black, one-shoulder dress, fitted but long with a slit to the side. You thank the woman for her help and start your trek back home.

It had been quite a while since you came to this part of the city. You were always so cooped up at the bar that going out wasn’t really on your to-do list. Nothing really changed. You spot a bakery at the end of the street and try to make your way there when a tall man with an impressive physique began flagging you down. You had second thoughts of whether you should stop or not, but upon a closer look, you realized it was your old classmate Choi San. You notice his hair had grown out quite a bit and he seemed just as handsome as he did in high school.

However, while the average woman would run to him no questions asked. It was a little different between you and san. A few years before your father had passed away, his father started a rumour accusing your father of hiring men to destroy his business place. Everyone eventually figured out that it was all a big tale as your father’s character was very far from the story that spread. But unfortunately, this caused a bit of friction between you and san going to school. Both of you weren’t friends per say, but after that incident it was quite awkward between you both. At the time, you were pissed that his father had that audacity to say such a thing and the fact that san said nothing to you during that time, not even an apology, you had no intentions of interacting with him.

That was until today. You pause your stride to face him from across the street and flash an awkward smile.

“Y/n is that really you?” he smiled and asked

“Yes, hi san.”

He walks across the street and approached you. “Ah it’s been so long, I heard about your dad. I’m so sorry.”

“Yeah, well that’s life, I guess. I’m doing alright now though.”

“That’s good to hear. I know we didn’t speak to each other much but I just wanted to say I’m really sorry for all the trouble my father caused. He isn’t well right now… mentally that is. I fear it may have started earlier than his actual diagnosis. Please understand that.”

“Oh… I didn’t know that. It’s okay san. Let’s just put all this behind us and move on with our lives yeah?” You extend your hand to shake his and he returns the gesture.

“Thank you. I’d really like to start over from now. A clean slate between two business owners, you and I.”

You give him a small smile before attempting to leave the conversation. “I should probably get going. I need to sort out some things back at the shop.”

“It was really nice seeing you y/n. Feel free to drop by anytime.” And with that, san gazed at you as if he longed for you to stay a bit longer. But the situation was so awkward for you that you didn’t quite know how to navigate it.

~

A few days passed and it was finally the day of the merchant’s ball. You had your entire look planned and took the day off from the shop. You took a shower, and stepped into your dress. You did your hair in large bouncy waves that you swept to one side of your shoulder and put your black heels on.

Not too long after you finished your makeup, your handsome escort had arrived dressed in a black suit adorned with embellishments. His hair was shaved at the sides with a side part, hair sweeping to one side of his head. He looked absolutely delicious and you tried your best not to be nervous around him. You took his hand as he led you to the carriage that he came in.

“You look exceptionally gorgeous tonight, darling,” he said to you.

Darling.

“Thanks, Seonghwa. You look really nice as well.”

The ride to palace was quiet and short. Seonghwa exited first and told you to wait. He opened your door and helped you out. Holding on to you the entire time, helping you up the grand staircase outside the palace. Upon entering you were greeted by palace staff who ushered you both into the main hall where the function took place. It was a giant hall with high ceilings, large crystal chandeliers, giant tiles on the floor, imported paintings and gold furnishings. Guests appropriately dressed, not overly fancy but not boring either, you could say that you fit in quite well.

Of course, as soon as you walked in, many guests had stopped seonghwa to greet him and catch up on old times as he was attending on behalf of his father. He introduced you to some of the shop owners in town as well as some of his army associates, all of which were pleased to meet you as they knew your father. You had really underestimated how many people knew who you were but you didn’t complain. The more connections you made in this town was better for you. As seonghwa spoke to a more matured woman who claimed to know him since he was a child, you spot the eating area where the hors d’oeuvres were being served. You gestured to seonghwa the direction that you were heading and proceeded to fill your stomach. After getting something to eat, you feel a pair of eyes on you but honestly you were so caught up in eating that you didn’t care to pay attention to your surroundings much. The gentleman approached you with a hand to the small of your back.

“Mind if I join you?”

You look up at the man, only to notice it was the one and only choi san. He takes a seat next to you and sips on his drink.

“You look really lovely tonight. It’s nice to see you here.”

“You look great as well, san. And yeah, it’s my first time coming to the ball.”

“I’ve only been to about two of these before. You don’t miss anything really, haha. Just a bunch of old folks talking about each other’s business.” You both chuckle as he takes another sip of his drink and you both look blankly into the distance. There seemed to be no more tension between the both of you, but more so a shared feeling of having the weight of the responsibility of managing the family business passed down not by choice but by default. You didn’t mind doing it, but it took a toll on you even though you tried not to show it, and after hongjoong left, life just seemed a bit emptier.

“I don’t know if this is right to say now but… I really regret what happened between our fathers. God, you must have hated me in school. I was really insecure back then. I just didn’t know how to handle it.” At this point, you’re unsure if this is the alcohol speaking or not.

“Look san, we put all that behind us, remember? A new generation has started. Times are changing, things are different. What happened then is in the past, there’s no need to go back there now,” you explained.

“I know, I know. I just, not that it matters now but, I really liked you back then. When he said that shit, I was so angry. I knew you wouldn’t dare look my way after that. So, I never approached you.”

“Wait, really?” you chuckle at his confession. “And what about now?”

“What about now?” he asks.

“Do you still have feelings for me?” you ask jokingly.

San turns his head to look at you and rests his drink on the bar counter. He slowly takes your hand in his and closes the space between you.

“Maybe I do. But seeing you walk in with Park Seonghwa, arm in arm like that… I don’t know how to feel now.”

“I mean, he asked me to accompany him. It’s a bit complicated right now.” You overhear the classical music in the background growing louder and louder and notice the guests have started to dance.

“Well,” he says pulling you closer, “is it so complicated that I can’t dance with you?” he asks, offering his hand to you.

Without saying a word, you hesitantly held his hand. You wondered if seonghwa would be okay with this, but then you remind yourself that you didn’t belong to him. You didn’t belong to anyone as a matter of fact. You were a free woman. Honestly you were a bit shocked to know that san had eyes on you after so many years. Life was so chaotic the last thing you needed was ANOTHER man in your life. But you didn’t like seeing san sulk the way he did. You felt really bad but it wasn’t like it was your fault?

San guided you to the dance floor and placed one hand on your waist, the other in your hand. Meanwhile your hand naturally gravitated towards his shoulder. With light feet, you drifted across the floor. Round and round in circles you went, occasionally glancing at san who’s grip on you was solid, his eyes never wavering. It was as if this was the moment that he waited for for so many years. You notice the glances of many other guests on you both. Pleasant ones. You felt like somewhat of a princess being twirled around, trying to keep up with the tempo of the music as it was your favorite song, Merry Go Round of Life.

As the song came to an end, you were breathless. Gripping onto san’s shoulders you let out a sharp exhale. It was too much to handle in one night. You felt nauseous and hot and you didn’t know if it was your anxiety or the one too many drinks you had. You needed to be alone for a few minutes before you pass out in front of all the guests.

“I’m sorry, please excuse me,” and with that, you ran to the restroom to catch your breath and calm yourself down.

Seonghwa saw every second of it. He knew that he was just your escort but part of him was annoyed at the show you and san put on. For one, he had always thought of choi san as a snobby rich boy who had anything handed to him as a kid. He always thought that he never had to really work hard because of his father’s shop and while he wasn’t wrong, san did have his own struggles to face. After the dance he noticed you run off and decided to follow to make sure you were okay.

Meanwhile in the bathroom, you sipped some water, took a few deep breaths and that constricting feeling in your chest soon began to subside. You fixed your hair and makeup and took a few more minutes before going back out into the hall. After emptying your bladder, you were ready to go again.

Suddenly you hear loud booming noises coming from the main hall. You wondered what in the name of God could have made that sound. A few more bangs of what seemed like gunshots rang off outside. You begin to hear the screams of women and the security yelled for persons to exit the hall immediately.

Do I stay here? Lock the doors and wait it out? Or should I try to find Seonghwa and make a run for it? No, I shouldn’t it’s too dangerous. Fuck. What do I do?

You figured if it was your time to die, you might as well embrace it with open arms. However, the chances of getting out alive seemed high as you were away from the main crowd so you decided to leave the bathroom and run into the winding corridors of the palace. You had no idea where you were going, you just ran as fast as your feet could take you as soon as you saw that the coast was clear.

That was until of course, you bend the corner and collide with a masked man in black, his wide brimmed hat hiding even more of his features. In the scuffle, you push past him so that you both now stared at each other facing the opposite direction you both were originally heading.

But… wait.

You both lock gazes, his eyes now widening as he looked at you, up and down. You knew those eyes. Those almond eyes, smudged with black liner.

But it can’t be… How? Why…

It was him. You knew him and he knew you all too well. Both your frozen stances created an awkward gap of silence. He had no intentions of hurting you and you didn’t fear him. But he said nothing. He turned his back on you and ran. He ran away, right into the chaos. Staggering backward, you hesitantly try to run.

But you couldn’t.

You turned around and picked up the pace in his direction and ran after the masked man. You see him overlooking the foyer to the hall and as he turns around to spot you, he runs toward you and pulls you back into the corridor so neither his men nor the guests see.

“I need you to leave right now. I’m so sorry. I will explain later, I promise.”

“Hongjoong, I-,” he cuts you off

“Y/n please just listen to me. It’s not safe here, please just go!”

You drop to the floor as more shots ring out. Your adrenaline kicked in and you regained your balance and ran for your life throughout the winding corridors. Soon enough you find an exit into the courtyard but you didn’t have a single idea as to how you were going to get home. That was when you spot seonghwa’s carriage handler in the distance and you ran once more.

“Where’s seonghwa?” you ask him

“He’s gone to help with the attack, please get in. I’ll take you home immediately. From the looks of it he won’t be coming back anytime soon.”

You quickly hopped into the carriage and it sped off. You figured seonghwa would have remained with the army to secure the area but you really hoped he would be okay. Thankfully, you made it home safely but only one thing lingered on your mind. Not seonghwa, not san, but hongjoong. He was back in town and you didn’t even know.

As you returned to the tavern you explained to your barmaids and guards what had happened in the palace and they were all glad you made it back in one piece. You decided to close the bar at midnight for everyone’s safety. But unfortunately for you, you couldn’t get a wink of sleep. That stare from the corridor haunted your brain. To think that he didn’t even come to see you, not even at the early hours of the morning.

“That bastard,” you thought to yourself. You went back downstairs to the bar and poured yourself a big glass of wine and with that, you were back in bed and out like a light.

Little did you know, hongjoong did in fact come looking for you that night, or rather, early that morning around 2am. He knocked on the tavern door but there was no response. He knew he had to explain himself to you and the more time had passed was the more he felt like your trust in him had dwindled. He scaled the building in an effort to get to you. Perching himself on the window sill, he tried to quietly jolt the window open to get inside. Luckily for him, it slid right open and he hopped into your room but unfortunately, he noticed you were already in a deep sleep from the glass at your bedside which smelled of alcohol. He didn’t want to wake you, so he spent the rest of the night taking a short nap on your couch in the study and hopefully explain himself in the morning.

A few hours later, slowly drifting back to reality and out of your slumber, you open your eyes and see your bedroom door slightly open. In your disoriented state, you slowly pull yourself out of bed to investigate why it was open, only to find a man who seemed to be asleep in your quarters. Your eyes shot open, hand flying to your mouth as you grabbed a crowbar you kept under your bed. Slowly approaching the intruder, you lower your guard as you realize who the person was. As your fear subsided, rage started festering inside you and your blood began boiling. Did he really have the audacity to send you away then break into your room and now sleep on your couch?

You walked up to the sleeping captain and grabbed him by the throat, jolting him out of sleep, eyes opening in shock, a lack of oxygen stifles him as he holds onto your hands. Realizing he can’t breathe in your grasp, you let go. Thinking about what you had just done.

“Kim Hongjoong, you bastard.”

Coughing and holding his throat he falls to his knees before you.

“First you leave me for months, no goodbyes, nothing. You come back to town, not even bothering to come see me only for me to recognize you in a mass holdup where I could have possible been killed! And now you’ve broken into my bedroom and had the audacity to fall asleep on my fucking couch? You’re a fucking handful aren’t you.”

Hongjoong, still catching his breath, stays on his knees and grasps onto your legs. “I’m so sorry y/n. I came earlier but I didn’t see you. I figured you had gone to the ball. I wanted to warn you before but it was too late.”

“Why did you run from me then…”

“What?”

“In the corridor. Why did you run away from me?”

“I couldn’t explain everything to you then. It was best for you to get out of there. I didn’t want you to get hurt in my mess. If we were seen together, it wouldn’t look good for you.”

“Why the ball? What did all those people ever do to you?”

“This wasn’t our doing y/n” he explains, “Remember you had been robbed a few months ago?”

“What about it…”

“Those men were part of a huge gang in this city. They were ordered to rob your bar as an initiation. My crewmates and I had spied on them one night before we left. We caught them stealing, we asked them who they worked for and what was their business robbing the merchants.”

He continues as he sees the puzzled look on your face.

“They were so scared they told us everything.. who their boss was and all kinds of evil things they do. While we were in France, we got word of a big heist that was said to take place. We weren’t sure when but someone told me that the merchant’s ball was very near in the future so I figured it would take place then. We decided to return because we knew that if anything happened to the markets it would affect so many people, including us. Trade would never be the same if we didn’t step in tonight. We realized that they infiltrated the palace through the staff. Impersonators in the kitchen staff, guards, custodians. So nobody realized that there were gang members so close to all these famous business owners. We had to wait until the very moment that they attacked to retaliate. We couldn’t even go to the police because they would probably throw us all in jail for conspiring or some shit. That’s why when I saw you, I just told you to run. You could’ve easily gotten hurt if you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

You sat there trying to process all this information so early in the morning. There was a long pause after hongjoong’s explanation.

“I hope that kind of explains the bigger picture. I know I didn’t come to visit you and for that, I apologize,” he says stroking your cheek, “I just didn’t want to bring any kind of danger to your door. It would bother me so badly if someone targeted you because of me.”

“I understand now. It’s alright,” you mumble, taking a seat next to him, “did anyone get hurt?”

“I believe some civilians were injured, unfortunately. We couldn’t avoid it, though. We tried our best to single out the gang members without the palace guards noticing. It was hard but the men we set out to kill were all taken out.”

You stare at the floor as he quietly spoke, eyes widening at that last statement.

“I see you’ve made a few friends as well?”

“What do you mean?”

“Mr. Prince Charming who waltzed you into the hall? And twinkle toes on the dance floor?”

If you had water in your mouth, you would have surely spat it out at this point. Hongjoong saw everything. And what he didn’t see, his men did.

~

part 3 coming whenever my brain starts working again idk

#hongjoong smut #seonghwa smut #san smut #ateez smut #Ateez hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #ateez san #ateez x reader #ateez fanfiction #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez wooyoung #ateez hongjoong #ateez mingi #ateez jongho

[anatomical-puppet]

Listen ok maybe this is just me being bad at analyzing characters or something BUT. I think one of the most interesting things abt herbert is that like. Sometimes i really and genuinely cannot tell whether he’s being sincere or not. Like he’s a morally bankrupt dude so you’d think it’d be made obvious to the audience when he’s being a lying lil weasel, but sometimes i just. Cannot tell whether he’s being genuine

The main thing that comes to mind with that is rufus’ death, because im not gonna lie i honestly cannot decide whether i believe herbert’s explanation or not. On one hand, it feels like a very obvious This Dude Is A Liar And A Freak moment in the context of the movie, like it’s a horror movie and he’s a fucked up scientist so OBVIOUSLY he’s lying and he totally killed that cat

But on the other hand .. idk i just dont think herbert is stupid enough to think killing his roommate’s cat is a good idea. He needs that lab space more than he needs this one test subject, and he has to know that even if he made up an excuse then dan would still be suspicious of him and it could jeopardize his whole living situation. And like also, they are in the northeast us, so it’s not like there are no other small mammals around, if he needed a test subject. I just. Idk i cant figure out whether i believe him in regards to what happened to rufus it’s tricky for me to parse out

#jeffrey combs please stop being such a good actor youre making it very hard for me to figure out herbie’s deal >:(( #re-animator #herbert west #reanimator #tw animal death

[mousiekosmos]

HI UHM IM ALIVE AND ALSO FORGOT TO DO THIS YESTERDAY JE SUIS HIGHLY STUPID BUT YES !!!!!!! PART TWO HAS BEEN RELEASED FROM CAPTIVITY AND IS HERE WOW LET THE COURTING CONTINUE

Summary:

'“Kaveh cannot know about this.” Alhaitham felt the words leap out of his throat like bullets from the barrel of a gun, “There is too much risk to tell him something so severe outright. The chance it would jeopardize what remains of our friendship is too substantial of a gamble."

Cyno hummed as if to himself, ordering another drink from the same waitress that'd swung by a little while ago and sipping at the final dregs of amber pooling at the bottom of his near barren glass. He stared Alhaitham dead across the table, and it wouldn’t have taken even the slightest shred of intelligence from any of the three admittable geniuses present at the table to pick out the bright twinkle of glee at his teeth and the silvery snark of his tone that came with it.

"Well, if it's abruptness you're worried about, you could always try courting him."

or

alhaitham is ridiculously in love with kaveh. now, he just needs to make him believe it'

#genshin impact #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin impact fic #complete #fluff #angst #multichapter #sumeru #alhaitham #kaveh #haikaveh

[andi-is-bored]

ok i have watched episodes eight and nine of Ted Lasso from the times of two days ago to now and i have some stuff to say.

first off, i love Keeley and Roy’s relationship, the end of episode eight with them getting together and stuff is great. i like that when Roy asks Keeley out on a date, the day after he was ignoring her which caused her to sleep with Jamie, it didn’t cause a bunch of stupid drama with her keeping it from him and shit, she just told him point blank and they dealt with it, it’s extremely refreshing cause i hate that trope in tv.

also, Roy has become one of my favorite characters. i don’t know if it’s his dialogue or his actions and the way they are resolved or if i just really like Brett Goldstein as this character but whatever the reason, he’s my favorite and i want good things for him.

now for the good stuff.

Rebecca finally telling Ted about all the shit she’s pulled and her trying to right some of the wrongs in a way was done really well and i really liked it. i don’t know how to put it into words exactly. Rupert coming to her and saying him and Bex were having a baby being the final straw for her was something that didn’t click until a few minutes later, when she went to Higgen’s house. but it makes sense, her realizing that destroying the club wasn’t going to make Rupert’s life hell like she wanted it to and seeing that in doing it she was jeopardizing her relationships with the only people who have stuck by her during the aftermath of the scandal was very satisfying and done so well it’s weird.

also the confrontation with Rebecca and Ted was so good i can’t believe it. Ted forgiving Rebecca just like that, with any other characters would have been terrible. but since it’s Ted it’s in character and i think it was the only way they could have done it well.

also (again) i’m just gonna say that everyone in this show is a fucking good actor. they all bring so much personality and charm to these characters it’s crazy. the emotional moments as well are so good, i can almost feel their emotions through the screen (i know it’s so cheesy i hate myself for it but it’s true)

ok i’ve rambled enough, im very excited to watch the season finale so i’ll do that soon.

#i’m in love with rebecca walton and i want her to be happy #and i want rupert to die in a hole for treating her like dog shit #ted lasso #ted lasso season 1 #ted lasso season 1 episode 8 #ted lasso season 1 episode 9 #rebecca welton #keeley jones #roy kent

[hauntedwoman]

titanic watch notes (4/14/23)

when jack saves rose from the back of the ship and the colonel asks cal to give a reward to jack and he offers money rose asks him "is that the going rate for saving the woman you love?" that means she knows that he loves her yet she still shoves him or any pathway to effective communication aside. this also insinuates that their relationship probably used to be better than what we see in the movie

it's said that nathan (cal's father) was the claimant for the insurance claim that was placed on the necklace after the ship went down but it was filed under terms of "absolute secrecy" So that could mean a few things 1) simple damage control 2) he sees cal as incompetent and he feels the need to cover up such a huge financial loss at the hands of cal's impulsivity (this could hint at their relationship being strained)

why doesnt cal end up keeping the drawing ????? considering how badly he wants to possess rose why wouldn't he have held onto a drawing of her naked body ?? maybe he didnt because of the intent behind the drawing and it wouldve been too painful to look at but it is still very much A Question

and on that note why does cal tell rose that he framed jack???? if he wanted her to get onto a lifeboat and go back to her life in first class and still marry him and everything why would he jeopardize all of that for a snarky one-liner ???? ("you know it's a pity i didn't keep that drawing it'll be worth a lot more by morning") im just gonna chalk it up to james cameron being bad at making characters with actual dimension

continuing on that: there are so many stupid cartoonish one-liners that cal has throughout the film just to very much communicate to the audience that he is The Bad Guy. one example of this that annoys me is the whole "something picasso" bit like oh god forbid someone who's morally ambiguous have any appreciation for art or culture (rose being into these things somehow makes her morally superior ???) another one i really hate is the whole "i suppose i might start minding what she reads from now on" at the lunch scene when rose makes that dick joke abt freud

also lol when she makes that joke that insinuates she knows what d*ck is (subtext into cal and rose's relationship ???)

when brock is talking to old rose about to hoto he regurgitates the same thing that cal told her he gave her the diamond (worn by louis the sixteenth, very rare, etc, etc.)

when jack saves rose from jumping she grabs his hand that doesnt have her engagement ring on it

cal gives rose the diamond the same night she tries to kill herself. he knows what she was really doing at the back of the ship, or at least some semblance of it

THAT SAID:

still totally hung up on the whole "john calvert is actually cal" theory lol of all of the names that james cameron could have chosen for her new surname it Had to be That ???

cal and rose both act the same way under any sort of scrutiny (defensive and they automatically move to insulting the other person)

why is it scandalous that madeline astor (who is rose's age) is pregnant but not scandalous that another man is clearly traveling with his mistress (spoiler alert: it's misogyny)

the presence of god and christianity throughout the film ("god himself could not sink this ship", the church service on the morning of the day the titanic hits the iceberg - which is only available to upper class passengers ??? - the priest praying and speaking psalms as the ship is sinking) i think that the larger cultural commentary here is that during this age (early 1900s to 1910s) there is so much innovation and invention happening that humanity begins to feel that they are on par with god (esp the wealthy)

jack and rose have s*x right before the ship hits the iceberg, big juxtaposition between life and death there

still cant get over how rose put her name on the survivors list as rose DAWSON…. theres no way cal didnt know she was alive they saw eachother again after the sinking even if it was him seeing her on a poster for a movie/play or her reading headlines about him or maybe one day they seek each other out but regardless yea theres no way they didnt have contact again

also on that note old rose is an extremely unreliable narrator bc when she talks about cal killing himself she says at the end "or so i read" so there's a level of ambiguity there, there's also some hesitation of her to admit that she kept up with him all of those years bc then it would have completely discredited everything she had said about jack being her one real love etc etc

#if anyone has anything theyd like to discuss or add or debate pls pls pls send asks/dms i could talk abt this stupid movie every single day #for the rest of my life <333

[wafaelsx]

awesome thoughts I

ok, this will be a more lighthearted series of stuff for u to read and not either pity me or wanna kill yourself from what im saying. these are thoughts that i have that are very slightly interesting! like seinfeld episode opening where jerry would say something kind of funny that has todo with the episode but here goes

you’ve probably seen this thing thats a common trope in both fiction and real life actually, where a person is trying to reach an important person who has security around them or whatever, and the security guys like yo u cant get that close or whatever the fuck. then the important guys like woah wtf are u doing hes alright and lets the guy through to talk/be with him, and everyone sees the security guard as the bad guy. i think that is fucking stupid. him being like oh okay sure go ahead in the beginning would prob make him lose his job or jeopardize it, but if u dont let the guy thru for whatever reason ur the villain of this wholesome story that ppl try to feed you

im putting myself on what i like to call the ‘female trait diet’. basically im gonna eat like half or a 3rd of how much id normally eat and see if my stomach actually shrinks and im not just tired and lightheaded all the time from not enough calories. i mean im already tired all the time so that might be another female trait (chronic fatigue syndrome). i really unironically don’t like eating, and for a while ive been just refusing to eat whatever i dislike which i still believe is perfectly fine its fucking free will man. ppl talk about how short life is why eat some shit u dont like if life is indeed so short bro. but basically the whole point is i dont like to eat food anyway so ill just try to eat but an amount small enough to the point where itll be gone before i can be pissed about it.

bonus: i might do a social experiment where i make my whole personality correcting pronouns for a month or something, idk im bored

thanks for reading, perhaps more not so depressing shit in the future

#awesomethoughts

[winters8child]

It´s been a long, long time Chapter 2

If I had to describe Bucky Barnes in three words, I would say hes charming, courteous and handsome. So would any other girl in our neighbourhood. The girls loved Bucky and Bucky loved the attention. He loved the cookies they baked him, he loved that they sewed on the buttons back onto his shirt. He loved the fact that they all got giddy when he passed them.

Who could blame him? He was a 14 year old boy after all. Steve and I would watch the girls fall over themselves, while we enjoyed the cookies Bucky did not care to eat. Sometimes Steve would get a certain look on his face, as if he thought to himself "If I just could get the fraction of that attention…". Which always made me sad, because Steve was one of the kindest souls I had ever met. On a particularly hot saturday the three of us were sitting outside of our building, trying not to melt into puddles. Just as I was about to go back inside, I spotted two girls, staring in our direction. I did not have to think twice, why that was.

Something in my stirred, something that I did not like. It reared its ugly green head and bit me in my heart. "Dont you get tired of it Bucky? Stringing them along?", I asked. He looked confused, because I had never commented on his little affairs. "Who said I was stringing them along? Maybe Im just looking for the love of my life?", he proclaimed. "Yeah right", I heard Steve mumbling under his breath. Bucky was getting kinda angry, which surprised me, because I had never seen him getting angry. "You are just jealous, thats all.", he said. I was caught me off guard,because all these months I had tried to not show any sign of jealousy. He was my friend after all, just my friend.

Before I could come up with an answer, Steve stood up and said "No Im not, I dont want to be like you, I just feel sorry for the girls. Thats it." and walked away. Bucky looked at me with an expression on his face, I could not decipher. Without a word, he made his way over to the girls and left me standing there. I spent the next days holed up in my room, reading or trying to more like. It felt weird, not to spend every waking hour with the boys. But I didnt want them to think that I was acting weird around Bucky. I assumed that spending a couple of days apart, might supress that ugly feeling of jealousy. I did not want to jeopardize our friendship, for a stupid crush. Because thats what it was. I was just like all the other girls, falling for his charm.

On the fifth day I heard a knock on my bedroom door. I assumed it was mom, needing some help in the kitchen. "Come in", I called. The door opend and revealed the exact person I was hiding from. "Hey, your mom let me in. I hope its ok", he stated. In that moment I noticed that, those days apart did not help at all. He was gorgeous as ever and I felt as stupid as ever. "Uhm yeah its ok, Im just feeling a little sick…so its better if you leave", I stuttered. "So you are not beeing weird?", he asked. "What? Me weird? No never, just sick is all.", I lied.

He seemed relieved, I felt like a fraud. "So we can hang out again? I mean when you feel better?", he asked. My heart made a jump at that thought, which made me almost jump, because I was afraid he could see right through my chest. "Yeah sure, I missed you…I mean you guys, Steve and you of course.", I replied. He smiled at that, put his hand on my shoulder and said "We missed you too, I would not want to be without my Lottie. My girl best friend".

Oh yes who would not want to be Bucky Barnes girl best friend.

#bucky barnes #steve rogers #marvel fanfiction #marvel #the avengers #sebastian stan #fanfiction